Original subtitles

?1 I felt like I had a lot of time.

I know.

It's good. I'm good.

Yeah. We're, um... we're just getting off the freeway.

Yeah?

Did, Hugh pick you up at the office, or...

Yeah, he was coming in from Oakland.

He was late, of course. Then I took him...

And then, he took me to some lawyer bar.

A lawyer bar?

Yeah. A lawyer bar, kind of.

Yeah. I don't know. Everybody there seemed like a lawyer.

I felt like I was the only person without a tie.

Well, maybe we should get you a tie for emergencies.

Yeah, wardrobe emergencies.

Yeah.

Anyhow, we tried to take the freeway and...

Ke... Kevin?

I can barely hear you.

Is that better?

Not much.

Where are you? Are you there yet?

Yeah, I... I'm just pulling up right now.

I just got here. Um...

Yeah. I'm right here.

I... You know what? I need to parallel park and I'm not on my earpiece.

Okay.

Are you good?

Yeah.

You know, we should talk about, you know...

Maybe we can talk about, you know,

that little problem before we get into the party.

Okay.

Is it something we should talk about now, or...

Hello?

Kevin?

I lost you.

Oh.

Baby?

You gotta be kidding me.

I think olive oil would be good. A little more maybe?

- A drizzle. - A little more.

- Is this turning you on? - That is hot.

See how you're slipping? This is...

- It's... It's the bread, babe. - It's the two of you with the knives that...

I have not had carbs for a week.

I've been on this... this "cleanse."

How long have you been cleansing for?

About 21 days.

I had my juice and my smoothie earlier today...

and I do feel very, you know...

- Cleansed? Open? - A little faint maybe?

But I'm gonna eat,

I'm gonna drink and have a good time.

Hi.

- Hey. - How are you guys?

Nice to see you.

- Bend down to my level, please. - I know.

So, I just had Kevin on the phone and this happened.

It cracked.

As I was talking to him.

- You dropped it. - Our connection... No, I didn't drop it.

It just cracked as I was holding it.

Do you have insurance?

I... I actually don't know if I do.

Do you have the Skype app I showed you?

No, I think it's fine. He just said he wanted to talk about something,

But on the news, you know, they're talking about the comet.

- Yeah. - The Miller's Comet.

And they keep telling people that this can happen.

Yeah. I don't think it's the comet.

If you have Skype, it uses the home Wi-Fi.

No. The interference. They're saying things break.

Hey, do you want some wine?

Did Amir mention to you that...

he's bringing Laurie...

to dinner?

He's bringing Laurie?

Yeah. The Laurie.

Um, no, I didn't know that. I didn't know that.

- Who's Laurie? - Well, he is.

- You know Laurie. - Oh, Mike.

Long black hair. Kind of vixeny.

Wild and sexy.

- Oh. - Kinda strange, very mysterious.

- Very tight, tight, tight dresses. - Listen.

It's totally fine. It's such an Amir thing to do.

I was going to keep this...

This, my friends.

It's my own little rescue remedy concoction.

- Right. - It's our own mix.

- It's pretty s... It's very safe, I think. - Do you want a needle for that?

- Is it clean? - You can drop it into some water.

Just take the edge off, in case you're worried.

I don't know. I'm just... I'm offering.

It's echinacea, passion flower, a little valerian...

and ketamine.

- So it's all natural. - Ketamine?

That doesn't sound natural at all. That's a horse tranquilizer.

- Yeah, but it's just a whisper of ketamine. - I did that once.

I just thought maybe a celebration...

Are you offering this to me, because Laurie's coming here?

Well, I'm just saying...

- Now it's a party. - Ketamine or cheese?

It's right here if you change your mind. Oh, this is nice.

Where'd you get this?

Galaxy, that thrift store.

- Oh, I love that place. - Me too. I know.

Oh. Hi.

- Hi, baby. - What?

- Come on. Come here. - All right.

My wife.

- Hi. - Hey.

- How are you? - Hi. I'm good.

- Hi. - Hi.

- Do you guys want wine? - I do.

Cheese? Ketamine?

You look so good in leather.

Jesus Christ.

- Um... - I want water or something.

Did you know that, um,

- Laurie is coming? - There you go.

No.

- Laurie's coming? - Yeah.

Look at the smile on your face.

- It's not a smile. It's not that smile. - Oh, my God.

- Why is she coming tonight? - Amir's bringing her.

Beats me, because Amir's a total jackass.

Oh.

You know what? Put a quarter into the swear jar.

So, who did he tell?

Well, we got the... Yeah.

We got an e-mail about it. Just his plus one.

Plus one and then I was, like, plus what?

I need to know tonight?

My editor needs to know how to book hotels and flights.

I gotta do it. Let them know.

Gotta know tonight.

You know I-I... I can't...

I-I just need to think about it...

a little bit longer because...

I just don't want to make the wrong choice.

What if you came for a shorter time?

Like a month, not the full four months. Just come for a month.

It's still a very long time...

and I'm not saying no.

Babe, if you don't say yes, it becomes a no.

We're cold and hungry.

Hello?

- Hello. - Hi.

- Amir, you look great. - Thank you.

- Hi. - You remember Laurie?

Amir told me I wouldn't be...

- overdressed, now I'm feeling... - No. No, no.

We're underdressed.

- Hi. - Hi.

- How are you? - I'm good.

- Beth, do you remember Laurie? - Yes.

- Nice to see you. - You guys already said hello and...

How are you? Good to see you.

You guys want red wine?

Yes. I would love red wine.

- Lee? - I've been cooking. I've been cooking.

- How have you been? - I've been good. I've been really good.

- You? - I've been great.

Yeah. Life is looking very different from how it was a while back.

- In a good way, so... - Well, cool. That's good to hear.

- I would hope so. There you go. - Thank you.

Not A, C, E.

"Horace, listen.

I'll be down at the pyramid. Come on down and join.

We gotta talk about some deity stuff."

Does everyone else still not have service?

My phone is completely broken.

I'm living in the moment, but...

- Nothing. - I got zero.

That's weird. Maybe the tower's down.

The tower's down?

I'm telling you guys...

- It's not down. - That would be a big news story.

Comet. Comet.

- Miller's Comet. - Yes. Thank you.

I read something this morning about a comet in the 1930s.

It was in Finland.

- Knocked out all of the... - I actually...

the cell towers?

Actually, it was in 1923.

And, yes, it was in Finland.

- Um... - Thank you, Wikipedia.

It was actually crazy, because it affected the people.

After it passed, they would get lost.

They would end up in the wrong home. They would forget things.

They wouldn't really know where they were.

And I remember reading about this one woman...

who called the police and said,

"The man in my house is not my husband."

And then police came over...

and they said, "This is your husband,"

And she said, "No. This is not my husband.

- I killed my husband yesterday. - Awesome.

That's how I know it's not him."

But they couldn't arrest her, because he was standing...

right there in front in them.

Do they have any theories of why?

Think how lucky she is. She gets to kill him again.

Clearly she wants to kill this man.

- It's just the Finnish. - The Finns.

The Finns or Finnish?

- You guys remember Halley's Comet? - Yes.

I mean, it was such a big deal.

I remember at my school, we all had to, like, reenact Halley's Comet.

So, they assigned each of us something celestial to do.

My sister got to be Halley's Comet. I was very jealous.

I've never met your sister. Have you guys met her sister?

There's a picture of her right over there on the mantel, but...

- She's only a fleeting comet. - she looks a little ridiculous.

- That's your sister? - But why did you put it...

It's the door to nowhere.

In feng shui, a useless door,

which this is obviously a useless door,

you put a picture of someone...

you have e.vUmdvw