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Another victory on the cards.

The veteran champions lead 21-9.

Last serve for Retegui who need only one more point.

Amazing point for the challenger they want to get back in the match.

And another point makes 21-11.

21-15 now on the scoreboard.

Now they're level at 21.

The challenger has the serve.

The silence is incredible.

Difficult serve, bounce and 22-21!

Against all the odds, Beloki is the new champion!

For some the world is blue,

for others it's much blacker.

Good evening.

Sorry I'm late, fuck.

-I'm Serafin. -We'd given you up.

-Have you brought the money? -Yes, of course.

-Count it. -Just sit down, please.

Right. The money's all here.

15 million pesetas each. The house takes a percentage.

The winner takes 60 million.

You all know the rules?

Who doesn't?

Alain, if you please.

On the plate on right...

we have one delicious "Amanita caesarea" mushroom.

And on the left, four "Amanita phalloides",

or deathcup mushroom, absolutely deadly.

Now I'm going to make five omelets,

one with "caesarea" and four with the "phalloides",

which you have agreed to eat. "Bon appétit".

Right. The rules are simple.

The player who survives wins the 60 million.

Good luck, and enjoy your meals.

Remember, you pull out...

All you lose is your money.

I don't feel very hungry. Thank you.

Only four omelets then.

And only one is harmless.

"Et voil.".

Can I start? I like to be first in everything.

I don't know why I do this. I'm stinking rich.

Son of a bitches!

It's nothing personal. I'm allergic to mushrooms.

Your health, gentlemen.

Holy shit!

Right, gentlemen, you decide.

Okay, fifty-fifty then?

Come on, let's see if you've got the balls.

Eat, you bastard, it's equal odds.

What's a meal without bread and wine?

Where're you from?

-Logroño, sir. -Gibraltar more like.

Fill it up.

Fucking great!

I've been lucky!

Sorry Serafin, but you can still pull out.

Pull out? And leave this wine?

You crazy? I'm staying because I need the dough.

But you've got no chance.

This gentleman's survived.

So what?

I'm a gambler and I never give up.

Right then, if everything's in order...

one of us should snuff it.

Of course, everything's in order.

I don't fell well.

I feel bad, very bad. I think I'm gonna die.

Damned mushrooms, damned chef..

What bad luck!

I'm dying! I'm dying!

I'm sorry, gents...

can't stop for coffee.

My chauffeur's double-parked.

What a professional!

My dear friends...

Father Burutxaga...

Thank you for joining me... joining us...

...tonight.

It seems that it falls to me

to announce the forthcoming marriage

of my daughter, Araceli, baby...

and Juantxo Ortiz de Zarate.

This Saturday, the 6th.

Apparently his father, Don Serafin

is unable to be with us tonight.

Pity, isn't it Begoña? What a shame.

There is nothing more important for a mother...

What a mother...!

Hi, Angela!

Christ! What a surprise, Hermengilda.

How are you? Come, sit down with us.

Hi. How are you?

Fine, Angela.

Mom, I'll be with Konradin.

I was telling the girls...

that Jesus is the patron saint of pimps.

Did he not

get an erection when he saw Mary Magdalene on the cross?

I believe it's been proved.

It's not in the Scriptures because it was censored.

Yes, there's nothing more important for a mother...

...than the wedding of her daughter.

Which is why no expense or sacrifice has been spared.

As you can see from this habit...

There are 20,000 guys our age in this city.

How come my sister's spent 10 years running after the same dickhead?

I read about it this morning in the "Guinness"...

I didn't think it possible...

I want it to be a really special day.

And I've had two fabulous diamond rings...

with Colombian emeralds and two Indian rubies...

all set in white gold from South Africa

made by our great Basque artist and designer,

Omar Urretabizkaia.

Thank you, "habbibi".

They were rather expensive...

30 million each.

But worth every penny.

Juantxo...

I'm giving you two jewels.

Treat them with love and care.

Of course.

Now we'd all love to hear what you've got to say.

Speech! Speech!

Come on.

My boy.

Marquise...

and other ladies and gentlemen of the jury. I mean, in general...

The concept...

This really is a very important day for me.

-I can only say thank you... -Conceived without sin...

...especially to the marquise,

who is guilty...responsible for...all this.

And also to the Marquis of course... both inclusive...

...for having such a charming daughter as "Potxoli".

In thought or in deed?

...my sweet Araceli,

a woman I shall try to make happy.

Thanks to my parents, for everything...

...education, a position, and a legal practice...

Three Hail Mary's. I'm busy right now.

Ego te absolvo.

The concept is basically...

I think you could say that

I'm a very lucky guy.

Go for it, San Sebastian!

And finally

...let's raise our glasses and toast...

That's it, a toast!

Give me a glass of that. I'm dry.

Good speech, son, just like a lawyer.

Now have a rest.

Sorry I'm late. The traffic's fucking awful.

Started without me, did you? Well done!

Marquise, you look gorgeous.

What's with the bishop's outfit?

Not permanent, is it?

-How's the wine? -Fine, dad.

An '87 Beronia!

Shit! Excellent wine!

I'm not...

very good at this but it's a great day for me.

José Mari and Aurori's daughter...

is going to marry my boy, the eldest...

Just got his degree at thirty. Took his fucking time!

And now the best bit.

Thirty million, in cash. How it should be.

Dad, it's too much.

-No it's not. -You're tipsy.

Carlos! Champagne all round!

These days men's balls have shrunk to this size.

You guys missed the pelota game. Boy, was it exciting.

Excitement? There'll be plenty of that tomorrow.

-Who's playing? -Us against the Portuguese.

At 3 p.m. in my showroom.

What does it say, Angela?

-I bet it's something bad. -Pako's idea for sure.

It's for Juantxo. Pass it to him.

And for Konrado.

To be a rebel today has no meaning.

Serafin, it's not a joke. Let's pay the damn tobacco.

Ye of little faith!

I'll get this one.

TUESDAY, GRAND STAG PARTY. "Scandalo". 10 PM.

"Konrado Volvos." Hello.

Fitting an airbag, prick?

I bet you haven't got the car for tonight.

-Dad, can I borrow a...? -No.

Fuck you, dad!

They'll recognize my car.

Don't worry. They all look the same in the dark.

Sorry.

You'll be like a pig in clover, Juantxo.

They've got some mulatto girls that are hot stuff, man.

No, guys, I'll wait for you outside.

Don't be an asshole, it's your stag night.

-Right. -I'm just not in the mood.

Hey, guys, I'm worried about these spots at the bottom of..

Sometimes the PH in vaginal fluid can irritate the mucous.

What do you know about mucous aristocrat?

Have you brought the money, aristocrat?

Yeah, I've brought the money.

And something more important.

-This. -Let's see the instructions.

Come on.

Good evening.

What do you think?

The harem.

Don't tell me you've been here before.

Sure I have.

Let's get laid.

I'm going to talk about free love.

And the only professional of that love...

...Jesus.

I can see that all of you are rebels.

He was a rebel too.

And I also want to be one.

Long live free love.

Evening, girls.

I've brought a friend with bags of money.

He's getting married Saturday.

Right, "marquis"?

This one's gonna get his coffee with two sugars.

Ain't he now?

Gently...You like making love don't you?

Gently.

Poor thing. Where did you get that anaconda, big boy?

-You come along with me. -Yes, ladies.

I'm a rebel

because the world made me that way.

Because nobody ever showed me love.

Because nobody's ever listened to me.

Waow. It's getting as hard as rock.

This way.

I'm a rebel because I've always been that way.

They refused to give me what I asked for.

They just failed to understand.

I wanted to be

like any other kid,

any other man

who's happy.

I wanted

to give what's inside me

in return for friendship.

And laugh

and dream,

and forget rancour,

and sing

and laugh

and give

only

love.

I'm married.

Aren't they all, honey?

It's just...

Visa card or cash, my love?

Visa or cash?

Ah, now? In cash, okay?

We'll sort it out later.

But don't make it a habit.

Take your clothes off and wash it.

Wash what?

Oh, come on, honey.

Ph all the way!

It's freezing!

I'm sorry, it's a crappy tap. I scalded it.

I'll never get the hang of it.

Now with a nice bit of soap.

I don't like being kissed.

Stop, stop! I'll touch you.

-Are your hands clean? -Of course.

Oh, honey... it feels like gum.

Well...

Dry yourself.

You gonna give me the money?

It's there.

Excuse me.

Araceli de Alda? Your wife?

Yeah. Well, not yet, but...

Should have hangers in a place like this.

Well...?

Did you enjoy it?

Yeah, it was wild. Just great.

You're quite a performer.

Maybe a bit short.

Timewise I mean.

"Short but sweet", as they say.

You're so wise, my love.

And so virile.

I do my best.

Was it really too short?

Hey, you're a romantic.

You're a sweet guy.

Do you want to do it again?

I think it's getting a bit late.

Oh, come on, honey.

It's good to talk too

I love your accent.

Fucking's not everything. Making love, I mean.

What do you mean "love"?

You're nuts. That's great.

Ask, ask, I'll tell you.

What would you like to know?

You know something? I once saw UFO's in Patagonia.

And then I became a whore and now things are better.

Am I boring you?

Not at all.

I know. I've got you. You like action.

Have you done aerobics? I used to be a teacher.

-Here? -Yeah.

All together. We'll take it slow.

One, two, three...

Four.

Pump in, ventricular,

Pump out, auricular...

Ventricular

Auricular.

Come on.

Inhale, exhale...

Very good. You're doing great.

I'm okay now.

What's wrong, my love?

You don't like rubbers, do you?

Yes, I have to relax.

Better darling?

I'm relaxing...

Come here, give me your finger.

Suck my finger, darling.

Won't you do it for me?

-Suck my finger. -No

Cheers! To eternal screwing and UFO's.

And fucking them till they drop.

To the death!

Boy, did I sweat. I fucked her brains out!

And what a piece of ass, eh Konra?

Yeah, they were great.

She was gorgeous.

Look at him, Konra.

Not a cheep out of him. Did you score then?

Well, not exactly. Yes, I did. I mean...

What's the matter?

Are you OK?

My engagement ring.

Fucking kids! Go kill yourselves!

What happened?

I'm sorry about the ring.

-Why? -Because it was my idea.

Who hit you?

A lot of guys are into violence.

It turns them on.

And you...

Well?

Tell me.

It was my boss.

For not charging a client.

Look, about the ring...

I'm not talking about the damned rings.

Do you like your boss?

Shit!

Wait...

I like you. A lot.

I thought you were Cuban.

I like you too. You're fantastic.

It may sound like an excuse but it was my first time.

You were great.

You're an angel, but I don't have your ring

I didn't think so.

Who's got it?

It's dangerous.

Please.

Somebody who's into violence.

Your boss?

What's his name? Call him over.

-Why? -I know how to hit too.

Mr Villambrosa isn't here.

Where is he?

Can you really fight?

Sure.

I'm a karate black belt.

He's at the "Kokotxa" club.

Do you like hitting women?

That's a shame.

I deserve to be hit.

Poor creature, so full of vice!

Well, thanks, I've got to go.

Bye. Take care, karate kid.

Bye, Potxoli.

They'll kill me. Guys, it's all your fault.

-Why did we have to go there? -Cool it. We'll find it.

"Molest", 6 letters.

Harass.

And did she use her finger on you, too?

-None of your business. -What do you mean?

If you like it up the rear...

Up yours, Pako!

That's what I mean. It's not normal.

It's not normal? All right, it's not normal!

Hey, guys, don't get uptight.

Why don't we just let fate take its course?

According to the theory of chaos...

Right! You got it.

See, Juantxo, how you get desperate so easily.

That's what creates chaos.

Just relax Listen to some music.

Relax? You're gonna fucking kill us!

No fucking way. This car's what you call life insurance!

Airbags on the driver's and passenger's sides.

Great. In the back it's my ass that's on the line.

-Don't say that word again! -I didn't say "ass".

-Yes, you did. -No, I didn't.

-You did! -I didn't!

"Harass". I said "harass".

Konrad!

"Molest... six letters."

"Harass".

A good word.

-Crash... collision. -How many letters?

Stop!

Shit!

DANGER. BATHING PROHIBITED

Shit! It's not our day.

I've wrecked the car!

Fuck you, dad!

That's all we needed.

So much for the airbags.

Hell, why didn't they work?

Driver, passenger, life insurance...

Shut up, will you! All this for your fucking ring!

And whose idea was it to...

To what? Stick your finger up her ass?

Up your old man's ass!

Anybody hurt?

Not yet, but...

Are you Villambrosa?

Jesus, do you know me?

No, I don't. That ring belongs to me.

Where have you been putting your finger?

You should be ashamed of yourself!

Cool it, Juanxto. I'll handle this.

He'll tell you.

-I can't hear you. -He'll tell you!

Well Pako decided to organize a stag party

-By the way, I'm Konrado. -And he's Pako, the driver.

Shit, Konrado! Cut the chat!

If you think it's so easy, you explain it.

Where was I?

Well, when Juantxo stuck his...

The Marquise de Alda gave it to him.

Yes, that engagement ring.

So the ring belongs to that young man?

Please give it back. It's got huge sentimental value.

What kind of huge value?

I dunno, millions. How much was it, Juanxto?

Hey, you!

Come back!

Shitbag!

Hey!

Thief!

Bastard!

Hey!

Shitbag!

Oh, shit, the airbags!

Just when we needed them.

Pako, will you stop this thing!

Stop this! Shit!

For God's sake!

I'm suffocating!

Try and breathe.

-I can't! -Take it easy.

It's got limited dimensions and it's explosion-proof.

Hey, mister!

Stop it!

That's the way it is!

Let's go.

I can't take it anymore.

-Damage doesn't look too bad! -Don't talk crap?

Konra, where're you going?

There's a huge chance that it'll explode.

Why should it explode?

-Like in "Starsky and Hutch". -If you say so.

Shit! run!

Run!

Rats.

Filthy blackmailers.

Some people have got no scruples.

30 million for some crap photos

that are out of focus.

That fucking kid was pretty cute. Incredible!

Hello? Yes, yes. It's Mr Villambrosa.

Palomeque, watch the puddle.

What about the briefcase?

I wanted the thirty million here today.

Today, tod..ay!

Look, Mr Candidate, I have business in Portugal.

And I've got problems with Souza.

Every time I talk to him my ulcer plays up.

Sir, I think we should call it a day.

I want to master this game before the elections.

There's still a week to go.

You'll have the money tomorrow.

Your money and the "gift" you wanted.

Still unopened.

You know I'm a good investment in your future.

Don't forget that.

Bye for now "Mr President".

Excuse me, sir, we're at the ...hole.

I don't feel very well.

Tourino, call Souza. No more fuck ups.

Oh, about "Russian Omelette"...

Call the Portuguese guy.

You're right there. Wait.

Pako's right.

You can't go back without the ring, Juantxo.

I've been away from home for 20 hours.

Yeah, that's true. Hold on.

His fiancée hasn't heard from him.

So fucking what?

Wait a second.

You guys are driving me nuts. I'm outta here.

Hey! Kiddos, you, Konrad, we need a car.

And Juantxo, we need money.

No way!

I Copied it exactly.

But then he put his glasses on.

I just don't know.

Glasses!

Hey, Guys!

I dunno.

ALENTEJO, SOUTHERN PORTUGAL.

Joao Villambrosa.

-My friend. How are you? -Fine.

But worse than you for sure.

How's the ulcer?

Better, thanks.

It's been fine the past few weeks.

In fact...

Since I last talked to you.

You should control that temper of yours.

I'll give you a home-made remedy on Friday. At the casino.

Brazilian medicine.

Don't worry.

On Friday I'll soon forget my pains when I see the "cattle".

I'm bringing the best girls you've ever seen.

Not just because I respect you.

I also have my own motives...

for wanting a serious agreement.

Yes, in Arosa not only will we sign our partnership

but seal our friendship.

By the way,

could we not bring the the swap forward to today?

Well, if you think it's necessary.

No but "Don't put off till tomorrow what you can do today".

And I say: "More haste, less speed".

I just thought that...

No...no

I don't mind doing you that favor.

You owe me one.

I'll tell Fatima do Espirito Santo.

-See you on Friday in my casino. -Look after your health.

Thanks. Don't nor...

I feel worse.

That's much better, Tourino.

We can't pick up the "macrowaves" inside.

We don't have a satellite dish.

Listen, Pazos, we're not going that way, so listen.

Have you got the "crabs"?

"Crabs"? No, it's not the season.

Only in the months with "r" in them January, February...

I said "crabs". Ten kilos worth.

The coke? Why didn't you say so?

The order arrived. Who picks up the drop?

The Portuguese will be there at 6.

The goods are worth 30 million.

Take the money and bring it to Arosa.

Do you think you can manage that?

Come on, boss, just trust me.

I'm an old hand at this.

They're professionals so try and act like one.

It's easy as peeling a banana.

Give my regards to Mr Villambrosa...

Sorry.

My poor child.

All under control, sir.

Pass me an "Almax".

They're real busy.

No, Konra, that's showing off.

-Sure this is it, guys? -Yeah, course it is.

La Kokotxa. Look prawns.

Afternoon. Mr Villambrosa?

Of course. I've just spoken to him.

I dunno, I expected you to have an accent.

Good afternoon.

Forgive me, but we think you have something that belongs to us.

Yes, in a minute.

But have a drink first. You must be tired.

-Yeah. Of going up and down. -We got lost three times.

Well just relax. We've got some girls you're gonna love.

On the house, as usual.

You're very hospitable.

Very kind. Nice and cool.

By the way, what about Villambrosa?

He's fine, thanks. I'll tell him you were asking after him.

Now tell me, has your car got airbags?

Driver, passenger and side, just fitted.

Fucking professional. Like a ring on a finger.

Mr Villambrosa could be a bit more discreet.

Did he say he was coming?

He's very definitely probably coming.

He was very clear on that matter.

I couldn't hear him very well.

We've had trouble with the immobile phone.

Listen.

Mr Villambrosa left the matter in my hands.

So no need to worry. It's all taken care of.

But now... a concept.

Why don't you relax and get laid?

We've got plenty of time. And I'll go get organized.

Marquitos! Tonin! Back to work. Fuck!

We're pushed for time. And feed those fucking hens!

I painted this in my hippy phase.

-What do you think? -Exquisite, colorful.

I'm an artist, man.

I was a sailor, a welterweight, and a sculptor.

But they don't appreciate me.

Move it!

Nayat! Navratilova!

One's Arabic, the other's Chechen.

High class, real pros.

Where's the action?

Well, well. Three young 'uns.

Great.

Sorry, but I've come here to...

No, you take it easy.

You and me are going to have a few drinks.

Us partners have got to get to know one another.

Girls...

Give 'em some liposuctions. You know what I mean?

I do indeed.

God, what a bunch of wimps!

Palmira, open that bottle of grappa of mine.

-Grappa? -I was keeping it...

for a special occasion.

I can see you've got a good eye.

It's not the standard Mini-Uzi.

It's the Micro-Uzi SMG.

A killing machine. A real gem.

You'd noticed of course.

-Hold it. -No.

-Hold it! -No.

Hold it for fucks sakes!

Holy shit!

And there's me explaining.

Shit! These foreigners come prepared.

"Somachinegun", eh?

Palmira, another bottle!

Very professional.

Right, that's it.

Christ, more tourists.

What a sight!

What a vision!

Don't get ideas. You don't stand a chance.

Want a bet?

Hi.

Smells of gunpowder. I like it.

Were you expecting me?

All my life.

I'm Fatima do Espirito Santo.

I understand you know about airbags.

Oh no, not again.

My partner's an expert. He spends all day fitting them.

Fantastic!

I like to go fast.

And I think I'd feel safer with one of those things.

Could you look at my airbags?

We don't mind, do we Konrad?

Where were we?

I like to go fast...

...and come slow.

Hello. Oh, it's you.

I have to check the airbags.

Of course. Let's get out.

So the bitch says:

"I'm leaving" "When you quit that job..."

"I'll be waiting for you."

I don't have to explain what this job's like.

I understand the concept...

The girls give you problems, maybe the cops.

No, not the girls. They just need a firm hand.

But the cops they come into your concept.

You gotta give 'em a bit of the take.

-You mean pay the police? -Look, amigo...

There are two basic options.

The money you'd spend on bullets you give to them.

So there's no risk factor delineation from either angle.

Let's not talk about that.

Look.

After 15 years of marriage,

with the kids at the best schools in "Cam Ford"...

They had everything.

Now I'm alone. All alone.

Ah, Carmina.

Her in Galicia and me in the Basque country.

I'm sorry, man. It upsets me.

Go ahead and cry. Let off some steam.

You said it. I'm all choked up.

You understand, don't you?

Of course.

Damn it all!

Come on "El Deport"!

You were right

I didn't listen to you.

I have to accept that

with a glass in front of me.

My head feels heavy

How I suffer.

I swear I need

to return.

There's a woman all alone waiting for me too.

Fuck it!

All checked, ma'am.

Konra, this is my friend...

Glad to meet you.

"Somachinegun".

I'm going.

Now?

I owe you a dance.

Fuck you, dad!

And the ring?

Fucking bitch!

Hey, amigo. Where's Villambrosa?

Watch your step with Villambrosa.

He's a son of a bitch.

He's got everything in ambulance, got it coming out of his nose.

He'll be at the "Big Club". The best place we've got.

Swish place. You ought to see it.

Straight ahead at the intersexual, and you can't miss it.

Okay, Pazos.

What do we owe?

-It's on the house. -Let's go then.

My money ain't good enough-- for you or what?

Dickhead!

Fucking hell!

I'll blow your fucking heads off!

A bit of respect, Christ sakes?

Easy, guys. Pazos is a cool dude.

Quit clowning around. Hand over the fucking case.

What case?

The one you got in your hand, fucker.

He's just goofing around.

Now let's check the goods.

First something to fire you up.

No, Pazos, amigo. No more firing, please.

We trust each other then.

Between you guys and Villambrosa there's an important engagement...

-The ring. 30 million pesetas worth. -That's why we're here.

30 million. I know. Trust is everything.

Professional. Very professional.

Harder!

Harder!

-Well I'll be fucked! -Nothing.

Son of a bitch. Nobody does a number on Fatima.

Hey, Mr Tourino. How are you?

Tell the president he'll have to tighten his belt.

We did the swap. But their case was sort of...

sort of...

sort of e-m-p-t-y!

Empty!

You'll have the goods, Mr Souza. In a few minutes.

No, I didn't know.

How was I to know it was a jack in the box?

Travelling with your buddies.

Money in your pocket and the tank full of gas.

And a lot of road ahead.

200 km to the "Big Club".

The world is red.

It's blue.

It's all black to me. The ring. Son of a bitch.

Don't stop. They look like punks.

-Who? -Those hitchhikers.

Holy Christ and all the saints in a barrel!

Stop after the bend!

We'll wait further on.

Was that good luck, corporal or bad luck?

What do you mean, lieutenant?

Three cars almost run us down in a few seconds.

That's bad luck.

But they didn't. So that's good luck.

It's a dilemma.

It depends how you look at it.

Sir, aren't you going to question them?

Of course.

Afternoon.

Why didn't you brake before?

Do you mean "before" in space or in time?

Good question.

The 1st would been seeing you and braking before.

The 2nd would mean that having braked

the car didn't stop in time.

Interesting.

So the question should be: who's to blame, car or driver?

Guilty.

I understand. Another dilemma.

So ask the question again properly.

Konrad, cut the chat.

Allow me, lieutenant.

Afternoon. The documents of the car.

-Konrad, where are they? -I'll get them.

Sorry.

I'm a lawyer, eh.

Get him to specify which documents.

Listen, smartasses.

Get the documents out of the fucking car right now...

Or I'll throw the fucking book at you.

-Don't hit the car, it's new. -So what!

So fucking what?

Didn't I tell you I was a lawyer, you clown?

Flathead!

-He's drunk. -Get out.

Don't hit the car, please.

Get out of the car.

Right...

now!

What the fuck are you doing?

Stop that!

Follow them! I'll call the station.

No, we'll both call the station.

Or we'll both call. That way we'll make absolutely sure.

I smell "crabs".

Your driving turns me on, you bastard.

Come on, step on it. They're ours.

I told you they were terrorists, lieutenant.

Get out! Get out!

Will you listen to me, damn it! Let the lawyer speak.

Fuck! I can't remember...

But I am not going in there.

-No way! -No chance!

-This is a paradise. -Paradise.

We shouldn't forget why we're here.

We won't.

-We'll just check out the place. -Let's go.

-Evening, gentlemen. -Evening.

Monica!

She'll fit the bracelets and explain the rules.

Hi.

-Welcome to the "Big Club." -Thanks.

Services are registered here.

Please accompany me, gentlemen.

Shall we go in?

What goes in must come out.

Two, four and six.

Pazos!

What the fuck's going on?

Lieutenant Llorente.

Great to see you in the club again.

What the hell was all that shooting?

And those alarms... and guns.

We thought we heard screams but it was a false alarm.

Look, Pazos.

It's not for me to tell you how to run your boss' business.

But I don't like your men. Look at them.

They look real serious.

Get ready for an inspection downstairs.

Sorry.

Pazitos, Pazitos.

Come on, boys.

Let's go.

Ladies and gentlemen, the Big Club

will be closing in a few minutes.

Don't forget our special offer for Easter.

Thank you for your visit.

Small world, isn't it?

-He's not here. -The next one then.

Okoito.

-What's that? -Bad PH.

It's the war. Hey, any cash left?

A bit.

Four more.

"Chica" for me.

-Do you like it, mom? -You look great.

Beautiful, dear.

It's the same as the one on Thursday, but worse...

Two more.

I've got a good deal.

Pass.

We'll talk later.

-Nothing would surprise me. -15,000?

25,000! What do you think?

I feel terribly guilty.

What about your banquet, Aurori?

-No, ours will be different. -It certainly will.

I've included a small menu for us vegetarians.

Help yourselves. There's more than enough.

Mom, "Obsolete Love" has started

Obsolete Love.

Episode 2005

Jose Alberto, my love, what's the real reason?

I'm beginning to think you don't want to marry me.

All right, Esmeralda, I'll tell you my secret.

When I find my real father I'll come back

and marry you.

And you know why?

-Because I love you. -Yes.

That's a relief

Cf course I do.

He won't come back.

Come on, Araceli, please don't cry.

You'll get us all going.

It's probably just a childish prank.

It's all Pako's fault. I know it.

If they don't show up tonight...

that bitch and her bastard will know what's good for them.

It's the wedding of the year and nobody will wreck it.

Don't worry.

If anything had happened we'd have heard.

They're not in any hospital and I checked with the morgue.

Paino! Fascist! You are the terrorist!

What if they've been kidnapped by terrorists?

My God! Let's have no more crying.

Conchi, close the window.

If you don't want to buy more tobacco just say so.

Temper, Conrado. It's an antique.

What's going on now? These damned kids!

Don't touch it. It could explode.

Conch!

Grave accusations of corruption and association with criminals

have affected the candidate's latest public appearances.

The voters have seen what the opposition's up to...

slandering me, associating me with undesirables.

Perhaps because of my fight against drugs,

juvenile delinquency,

and uncontrolled immigration.

Is that why?

Fair play, openness and honesty

have always been foremost in my campaign.

So let them

prove their charges if they can.

That's how meeting in the Basque country

of the presidential candidate Santiago Paino ended.

He's the leading candidate in the presidential race

according to all the polls.

Pako, the window.

According to the girls

we should be close. Konra, how much more?

Loads, but that's my last. Or second last.

You're out of it. Juantxo, how much more?

I told you yesterday. There are some bills left.

Fuck you, dad! I'm all alone. Man is all alone.

Vanesita...

She didn't charge me.

Look at him. He's crying like a baby.

Guys...

What are we doing? I'm a drug addict.

I've wrecked my life.

And your wedding, Juantxo...

Don't worry. We'll sort it out.

Take it easy, okay?

Sir, if there's gang warfare it'll ruin the campaign.

We mustn't be associated with any...

Don't get my balls in an uproar!

I pay you to solve problems not to fuck me around.

-Do you want a wood...? -A club. A clubbing...

We have to avoid scandals.

Okay... Call Villambrosa.

He always calls us.

Hey...

What an honor. What a surprise.

Marquise...

Allow me.

I received

your very generous donation to the party. Thanks.

The interests of a country are above

small personal sacrifices.

Just what I like to hear.

Positive people...

people in favor of things.

Speaking of favors... I came here to ask you one.

A favor.

My dear, no favors.

From you I only take orders.

I'm like a fox terrier, a doberman,

a wild orangutan trained to serve you.

At your service...

to the end.

Golf isn't your game, is it?

I prefer cards. All that "swing" and "green" and "tee".

It's sissy stuff.

Exactly.

Stick your butt out.

"Little house on the prairie"

You want the money but not to get even with Souza.

And that ain't easy, Paino.

I know reading's not your thing,

but it's the second time this week

I've seen your name next to mine.

So the problem with Souza can wait.

All right...

there'll be no war.

But that complicates matters.

It's not the first time I've been robbed by Souza.

And the money was going to you.

Chicken feed.

Fine. I'll settle the score my way

after the elections.

You'll have a lot to thank me for "Mr President".

I like the sound of that.

Tourino.

Call Souza.

Your men got the 30 million.

But we haven't seen one single gram.

A war!

That's the last thing a man of my age wants.

I trust Fatima.

She'll represent me. Tell me where and when.

My men will be there.

Unarmed.

We mustn't endanger our alliance.

I'd love to see your new casino,

my old friend.

Villambrosa.

Son of a bitch.

I swear to God I'll skin you alive.

Son of a Galician gutter slut!

Tourino.

Tell Pazos to be at the stadium at seven.

To fix things with the Portuguese.

No weapons.

-But he'll have to talk. -Then he'll have to learn.

-Hello, what's your name? -Rosana.

When do I start work?

Poor princess in captivity.

Can I call home now?

You'll soon have your own phone.

Let them go! But step on it!

We'll gain an hour and a quarter.

You don't know where the fuck we are.

Cool it, this is a great short cut.

God! Like in Angola!

This way we'll get them head on.

Fire!

Fools!

Hopeless idiot!

Too bumpy!

Bastard!

It's Mr Souza, ma'am.

Mr Souza.

Yes, sir.

What, sir? Make peace?

No weapons?

No weapons.

I understand.

But, sir...

Yes, sir.

What the hell are you doing?

-From now on I drive. -Cocaine makes you aggressive.

Anxiety, right? Anxiety.

Your driving's too jerky.

I feel awful, guys.

No more of that shit for me.

You can drive...

after the short cut.

Congratulations, Mrs or Miss?

Not all your men are here, but congratulate them.

They're real pros.

It's Miss.

You're very kind but I think you're wrong.

I'd have liked to see all your men, too.

And one in particular.

Congratulate them from me.

Let's not get into hieroglyphics.

We're here to clarify a couple of concepts.

Our bosses insist we get along together...

so I'll make an effort.

If you tell us where our money is.

And when you give us what's ours...

we'll discuss that concept in order to discuss it.

I see.

That's as clear as you can get.

Look, baby. Here we have a question.

The concept is the concept.

That's the question.

For example, you're

an educated woman.

And I don't object in respective to that because I'm broad-minded.

I don't go around saying all women are bitches in heat...

even if I think it.

But what about the concept?

I remit to the fax.

Very impressive.

I haven't given you so much thought.

And the concept?

No, I already said that.

Oh, fuck! What does it say here?

Well, let's try and get on together...

or a lot of blood could be shredded.

Mr Souza is respected all over Portugal.

In your country too. For two good reasons.

(a) he never double-crosses anyone and b)

He hates being double-crossed.

(a) and (b) huh?

Mr Villambrosa who is a "jentlemen".

He told me to sort this with pacifism.

So, a) Just as I could say one thing I could say another.

And b)...

Watch it, cos maybe you'll get a c).

Mine's longer than yours.

Hello.

I told you not to call me at work.

And me too... Pumpkin Pie.

Welcome, Mr Villambrosa. I'm so glad to see you.

Mr Paino rang at least 6 times.

He sounded rather upset.

It's going to be a grand night.

Just a roulette or two to fix up, that's all.

-Get it ready for tonight. -Mr Paino

said he had to speak with you. About the meeting

with the Portuguese.

The board room is ready

for you to sign the agreement with Mr Souza.

Have you heard from Pazos?

Not a thing.

-Come on, Roxanne. -Rosana, ma'am.

Locked away, asking for help. I think she's looking at me.

He's got a temperature.

I don't like the look of that bleeding.

Lack of sleep, too much coke. The body's an enigma.

We have to call home.

-We agreed not to. -To Pako's place.

Herme will understand.

Just say we're okay. We're heading back.

The wedding's the day after tomorrow.

We agreed we'd get the ring.

Fuck the ring!

Don't talk bullshit! Head for the next harem.

Get a hair of the dog that bit you!

Get the map out, Fuck you, dad!

Straight on to the "House on the prairie".

But first we need a...

"Reanimator", the drink with ginseng.

SPAIN

Killins?

-Which gang was it? -Three experts.

Experts?

They're not freelance.

They're Villambrosa's men.

I can smell it.

Dos Barros, tell the boys.

Fantastic.

Pity she's going to that politico.

Fonseca would have got much more out of her.

-Something went wrong. -What do you mean?

There was another gang. Three guys in a Volvo. Pros.

So, another bunch of jokers.

At the worst possible moment.

Those boys have made a big mistake.

Obsolete Love.

Episode 2006

Babe, I like the way it sounds.

Esmeralda.

I'm back.

After ten long years.

And nothing's changed, I see.

And I haven't found my father.

Good evening, everybody.

Are we all here?

Maid.

Help yourselves. There's plenty.

They cost the earth. Sent all the way from Denmark.

Delicious.

Hello.

I don't know about you, but I've made up my mind.

The police should be involved as soon as possible.

And if not, we'll call the Government representative.

Well, I think...

Tere, please.

You're not going to report my son missing

like some lost Pekinese.

We must reach an agreement.

Then decide if we call the police or the army or...

That's it, the army.

Well, just a manner of speaking.

-Well, I think... -Or the President.

We met him last year.

As well as the Sovereign Pontiff.

They're probably just out on the town.

We did the same before we got married.

You fool, the wedding's in sixteen hours.

Maybe he's smarter than we were and...

Don't be an idiot! How dare you in front of Begoña and... mat.

Peace, Aurori. Peace for God's sake.

My dears, I think you're all a bit touchy.

There is something I wanted to say.

I wasn't going to but we're all like one big family.

Yesterday I was worried about

Juantxo and the boys,

so I decided to take action.

I went to see Presidential Candidate Paino.

His security service is looking for the boys.

This evening we'll have the information.

You know me.

Always a step ahead.

Look, look.

A democrat on TV

A decision which could be described as surprising.

After receiving indecent photos,

Judge Rueda ordered

the imprisonment of Presidential Candidate Santiago Paino.

He is accused of illegal financing, association with criminals

and paedophilia.

It's all a pack of lies, a plot, a trick.

How was I to know she was only ten?

The parents are to blame...

for dressing them up like whores... Vote PNC!

Oh, my God,

What are we going to do?

-Back to square one. -Worse.

In this country imprudence has a high price.

Pako is to blame. He's a bad egg and so's his mother.

We're going to make a fool of ourselves tomorrow.

-Pako once asked me for a fellatio. -A what?

-Me too. -In your dreams?

That's it.

I'm going to call the police and look for that old slut, Herme.

And see what she says.

She'll be gadding about as usual.

What a shameful woman.

Whether she likes it or not, she'll have to explain.

Whenever you want.

Sorry ma'am. She wouldn't wait.

I've been waiting outside for a while.

Long enough.

What awful cakes.

From the local store, aren't they?

I've never really felt the need

to talk to you as a group. But now's a good time.

We were going to call you,

But we thought you wouldn't come.

Being invited is less fun.

This is ridiculous.

We all think Pako's to blame.

He's a bad influence on them.

That's true. I'm tired of all this hypocrisy.

What frankness, ladies!

I feel obliged to reply.

The truth is I was getting worried about Pako.

Too many hours with your boys.

I feared he was becoming like them.

An imbecile.

How dare you!

But after what's happened

I've discovered that

fortunately, they're just like their fathers.

You don't mean your husband. He left you 15 years ago.

Joao...

It was I who left that son of a bitch.

Look, the wedding's tomorrow

and we've got a serious problem.

Your sons have the problem, not you.

And that problem is their parents.

Serafin, are you going to let this slut insult us?

Serafin will say nothing

to this slut because he's a gambler and whoremonger.

What?

Herme... dear... don't stir things up.

Or do, or I don't know.

And Jose Mari,

and Konrado are demanding clients,

almost fussy, but exceedingly generous.

You slanderous slut!

The funny thing is for years

men paid to sleep with me.

Now there are some I'd pay to sleep with.

But I'm not the unfaithful kind. You are.

Did it never occur to you

that all these cheap bankers and politicians

you sleep with

then come to my clubs.

And they talk.

And not very nicely, my poor Jose Mari.

You're despicable.

Get out of my house or I'll call...

My best customers? Yes, I know.

Take it easy, dear.

I'm afraid I can't stay.

My masseur charges by the hour.

By the way,

I've got news from the boys.

They're...

they're fine.

Don't worry about the wedding. It'll all turn out fine.

Goodbye...

"ladies".

Jose Alberto, I'm your real father.

Bingo, that bastard's Cadillac!

What a joint, guys.

Well, we're here then.

We can't fail now.

That bastard's got the ring but it's not going to be easy.

He may well have a bodyguard.

How do you feel then?

Fucking great!

All set to go.

We have to stick together.

We'll try and play it cool

If that doesn't work...

We'll improvise.

Yeah, improvise.

As usual.

Well it looks like he ain't here.

We'll have look elsewhere. So let's split up, OK?

I'll stick around here. No need to worry about me.

Okay, Konrad.

What about you, Pako?

I'll check out the bar.

You know, bartenders remember people's faces.

I'll go on my own then.

And be careful...

with the PH.

Could you give me a rough idea of how to play this game?

Of course, sir.

Mr Villambrosa?

Excuse me.

What did you say?

Good evening, kind man.

I was just telling Einstein here...

that I want to speak to Mr Villambrosa.

For what purpose?

Look... I lost my engagement ring

up a mulatto girl's ass.

Mr Villambrosa chanced upon it.

And I've been following him from one bordel to the next.

So I guess he's expecting me.

Come in, come in.

What a joker!

Hurry up, the game's starting.

Here I am.

I know you, don't I?

Yes, we met on one occasion.

Excuse me, sir.

What is it?

Nothing serious, sir. Can you come please.

If you'll excuse me for a moment, please.

-How are you, sir? -What is it?

I didn't realize at first

but unless I'm very mistaken

the empty case those bastards gave me at the club is identical

to the one we gave to the Basque who ruined the "Russian Omelet".

And what the hell does that mean?

Not a fucking clue, boss.

Excuse me.

A small concept.

Do you play with wild cards?

Of course not.

The concept, that is the question.

Hey, Pazos!

What a surprise!

-Sir? -Yes.

He's one of te professionals.

The worst, the most dangerous.

Come on, El Deportivo!

Gentlemen,

I'm afraid the game is off.

Right now,

Mr Villambrosa.

I have to point out that that ring,

as you well know, is not yours,

but mine.

Now I remember.

You were in the crashed car.

And before that with Vanessa.

We have the same tastes, young man.

Do we really?

Like hell we do.

A small interruptus.

What's your father's name?

Serafin. Why?

The father takes our money and the son the cocaine.

Damned Basques! Sons of...

Wait a minute.

What money?

I'm sorry but we haven't robbed anybody.

That ring is mine.

What's your game?

Well, young man...

As you can see,

this is a place for gambling, so if you want the ring,

and you don't have my money to pay for it...

we'll play for it.

Your father seems to enjoy gambling.

And he's got balls.

Let's see if you're his son

or the postman's.

Your turn.

Right on!

What a pro!

Goddamn kid!

You got balls, kiddo.

You sure do.

But what good are they if you're a looney?

Not too smart either. There's only one bullet left.

And as I'm the generous type, I would like you to accept it.

I'm sorry.

I couldn't let you go.

Adios.

Holy shit, a woman!

Christ! Angela!

My daughter!

What?

Come on, Angelita, my darling.

I'm your father.

He's her father.

A present for you, dad.

They have a family thing.

They say he tried to get his leg over her.

And if that happens in a family, bad news.

Yep.

No, not this one.

So you had my money.

A thief who's robbed...

deserved it anyway.

Court is adjourned. Let's go.

Submachine gun.

Don't worry about it.

Gentlemen,

we can't stay for coffee.

That's 5,650,000 pesetas.

On the same number. 13.

Have you been playing long, young man?

Almost an hour.

Got it! Let's go!

Don't spoil the run, Juantxo. Look at this.

Are you crazy? I was born to play this.

What's going on?

Why the hell are you dressed up like that, Angela?

Come on, let's go.

Even if I have to drag you out.

Security!

What have you done, guys?

Guns! Dozens of them!

Think of something, Konra.

Where they least expect it. The front door.

-All right! -Logical. I love you, Konra.

I saw it in "Starsky and Hutch".

They're thieves! They've stolen the takings.

-Don't give them the ring. -No way!

I don't think they want it.

4 Thieves Killed

by the security services

of the Arosa Casino.

There're dozens of witnesses.

Citizens, and the city belongs to me.

And the judges too.

They could also be yours,

my children.

Your son? How?

Pako, this is papa.

Yes, Jose Fransisco...

You don't remember because you were studying abroad,

paid for by me.

It can't be true.

Son of a bitch!

Listen, Jose Francisco.

Fuck you, dad!

It was all a...

-set up. -Yes, a set up.

Pure slander.

Your mother

couldn't prove it.

I wasn't allowed to testify in court.

But I will now.

That's enough!

I gave you a last chance.

They're all yours.

So much for Starsky and Hutch, eh Konra!

-Where are we? -Hey, guys, this way!

Pako!

Pako!

Come on! Idiot!

Come on!

It's locked.

Shoot at the door.

The world is blue.

Let's go!

Konra, that's not style.

-It's showing off. -I was improvising.

Come on, this way.

What's wrong?

-Leave me alone. -So let's go.

Go and start the car!

Fuck! I don't get you!

Pako!

Trust me and start the car for Christ sake!

You owe me a dance.

Sorry, precious, you took too long.

A shame. Bye, darling.

Adios.

Is that mine?

That motherfucking pretty boy.

They've got the money and the coke.

They can't escape.

I hate to admit you're right.

Tires are flat, let's use the Dodge.

There's no room for you, fool!

If you squeeze over.

They're getting away!

They won't get far.

Fatima, you always surprise me.

Give me that!

Carmina?

I'm quitting this.

It's too stressing.

No, not interesting, stressing.

Hey, Carmina.

You were right.

But I wouldn't listen

I have to admit it

with a glass in front of me

and my head feels heavy,

how I suffer.

I swear I need to return.

Thank you

for coming, Governor, it's a great honor.

Thank you.

So nice, an open-air wedding.

Like in American films.

Or like in "Obsolete Love".

What a tragedy.

He went and did it.

I can't believe it. My own son.

I have to tell them.

We can't wait any longer.

The shame of it! I want to die.

I'm going to say a few words.

Quiet, quiet please.

Quiet.

Quiet!

Ladies and gentlemen,

as you can see

it's 12:30 and everything's ready.

But I regret to tell you

that the wedding

will not take place.

Will not take place

exactly on time.

I'm sorry for the slight delay. Thank you.

Juantxo, they're not manners It's just showing off.

All right. All right.

-Hello, Potxoli. -You had me worried.

Such a fool.

-What in God's name... -Shut up.

You had me worried to death.

For Christ sake, mom.

-Watch your language. -Balls.

Dearly beloved,

we are gathered here today to join together

Juantxo

Ortiz de Zarate

and Araceli de Alda.

Oh, Lord,

grant them eternal rest.

What took you so long?

A few problems with your ex.

Yes, I heard about it on the radio.

No, that's the funeral rites...

Ah yes, dearly beloved.

Juan Jose Crtiz de Zarate...

Juan Jose Ortiz de Zarate!

What?

Do you take Araceli de Alda

to be your lawful wife

in sickness and in health,

for better or worse, till death do you part?

I do.

The rings.

The other one.

Just a moment.

It but it must be here.

It must be somewhere.

What... My God!

Has joined together

let no man put asunder.

Your attention!

This is a revelation!

A sinful present.

Hey, Juantxo, there's a message from God for you,

Bless you, don't worry, you can sing with this chick.

Sugar daddy, come with me, I'll go with you and we'll be happy.

Good vices with me will be the best

but bad vices are bad for your nose.

Forget the power and about money, to be happy you don't need it.

Listen to this song, blessed be...

...those who sin to be happy.

Be good to her, she's a fine girl, a gift given to you by God.

Saintly Creature. You're delicious.

Long live the mother who gave you birth.

It seems God has earthly troubles, his celestial channel has no coverage.

He told me I'm his prophet, a bringer of new good to man.

Enjoy life and carnal sin,

there's nothing more sacred than to go to paradise

dancing. If it can be enjoyment, singing, dancing, singing...

Don't worry, my love.

We haven't lost anything.

That's my boy.

Or isn't it?

Is it? Oh, how should I know!