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And now a fireside chat
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00:00:03,712 --> 00:00:05,464
with the creators of
Comedy Central's "South Park,"
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00:00:05,589 --> 00:00:07,883
Matt Stone and Trey Parker.
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- Hi, I'm Trey Parker.
- And I'm Matt Stone.
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And this here's ole Scratch.
Say hi, ole fellow.
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We do a show called "South Park."
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Matt and Trey, tell us
a little bit about yourselves.
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Well, I-I met Matthew
at the University of Colorado
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where I was going to film school.
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00:00:28,779 --> 00:00:31,615
I actually met him
in Beginning Filmmaking class.
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I met him and found someone
who could make me laugh,
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00:00:34,368 --> 00:00:36,119
even when I felt like crying.
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00:00:38,038 --> 00:00:40,832
Guys, who would you say
are your role models?
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Well, I'd have to say
my biggest role model
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is Matt.
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I guess I'd have to say mine
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is Theodore Roosevelt, for his work
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00:00:48,507 --> 00:00:50,634
with the Rough Riders
in the Spanish American War.
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00:00:50,759 --> 00:00:52,928
Matt and Trey,
tell us about this episode.
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00:00:53,053 --> 00:00:55,097
This episode is called
"Cartman Gets an Anal Probe,"
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00:00:55,222 --> 00:00:57,099
and it's our favorite episode.
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In it, Kyle's baby brother Ike
gets abducted by aliens,
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and Cartman has strange things
implanted in his ass.
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I think that the reason
this episode is--
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00:01:05,023 --> 00:01:06,858
well, ole Scratch's favorite, anyway,
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00:01:06,984 --> 00:01:08,485
is because it's the only episode that
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Matt and I animated
completely by ourselves.
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You see, this was the pilot episode,
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done before we had a series.
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So Matt and I had to do
the whole thing by ourselves.
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For several months,
we were locked into
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a cold, dark, little room
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for long periods of time.
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You know, that "Kick the Baby"
game looks like fun.
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Have you guys ever
played it personally?
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00:01:29,923 --> 00:01:32,217
Well, neither Trey
or I have children.
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That's right,
the only family we have
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is each other and ole Scratch here.
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- We're not married yet.
- We can't even get dates.
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But the truth is,
until we have children,
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00:01:42,227 --> 00:01:44,479
we're not gonna know whether
or not we're gonna kick them.
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You guys seem to write
alien encounter material
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with a certain, uh, knowledge.
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Have either of you actually
ever been abducted?
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Trey, it's okay.
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Go ahead and tell.
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I grew up very near to South Park,
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and so I was abducted
when I was a small child.
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I remember the experience.
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I remember how horrible it was.
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I remember too much.
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So sit back, relax, and enjoy
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"Cartman Gets an Anal Probe."
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♪ I'm going down to South Park ♪
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♪ Gonna have myself a time ♪
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♪ Friendly faces everywhere ♪
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♪ Humble folks without temptation ♪
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♪ Going down to South Park ♪
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♪ Gonna leave my woes behind ♪
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♪ Ample parking day or night ♪
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♪ People spouting: "Howdy neighbor!" ♪
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♪ Headed on up to South Park ♪
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♪ Gonna see if I can't unwind ♪
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♪ So come on down to South Park ♪
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♪ And meet some friends of mine ♪
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♪ School days school days teachers... ♪
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Ah, damn it, my little brother's
trying to follow me
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to school again.
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Ike, you can't come
to school with me.
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Yeah, go home,
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you little dildo.
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Dude, don't call my brother a dildo.
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- What's a dildo?
- I don't know.
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And I'll bet Cartman
doesn't know either.
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I know what it means.
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Well, what?
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I'm not telling you.
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What's a dildo, Kenny?
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Yeah, that's what Kyle's
little brother is, all right.
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Ow.
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Dude, that kicks ass.
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Yeah, check this one out.
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Ready, Ike? Kick the baby.
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Don't kick the baby.
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Kick the baby.
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Aah!
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Whoa, Cartman,
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looks like you didn't get
much sleep last night.
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That's because I was having
these bogus nightmares.
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Really? What about?
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00:03:44,182 --> 00:03:46,101
Well, I dreamt that
I was lying in my bed,
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in the dark.
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When all of a sudden
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this bright blue light
filled the room.
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And slowly my bedroom door
began to open.
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00:03:55,235 --> 00:03:56,862
And then the next thing I remember,
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I was being drug through a hallway.
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Then I was lying on a table,
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00:04:01,908 --> 00:04:04,411
and these scary aliens
wanted to operate on me.
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00:04:04,536 --> 00:04:06,955
And they had big heads
and big black eyes.
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00:04:07,080 --> 00:04:08,874
- Dude, visitors.
- Totally.
102
00:04:08,999 --> 00:04:10,917
- What?
- That wasn't a dream, Cartman.
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Those were visitors.
104
00:04:12,711 --> 00:04:14,004
No, it was just a dream.
My mom said so.
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00:04:14,129 --> 00:04:15,672
- Visitors are real.
- Yeah.
106
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They abduct people
and they mutilate cows.
107
00:04:17,382 --> 00:04:18,800
Oh, shut up, you guys,
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you're just trying
to make me scared.
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And it's not working.
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Hello there, children.
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00:04:24,055 --> 00:04:25,474
Hey, Chef.
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What's gonna be
for lunch today, Chef?
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Well, today it's Salisbury steak
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with buttered noodles and a choice
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of green bean casserole
or vegetable medley.
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Kick ass.
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00:04:33,774 --> 00:04:35,192
Say, did any of you children
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see the alien spaceship last night?
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- Huh?
- Yeah, fat boy saw it.
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No, that... that was just a dream.
121
00:04:40,864 --> 00:04:42,741
And I'm not fat. I'm big boned.
122
00:04:42,866 --> 00:04:44,743
Oh, was it the ones
with the big long heads
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00:04:44,868 --> 00:04:46,286
and the black eyes?
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00:04:46,411 --> 00:04:47,871
- Oh!
- They took him on their ship.
125
00:04:47,996 --> 00:04:50,373
Oh, did they give you an anal probe?
126
00:04:50,499 --> 00:04:52,250
- Oh!
- What's an anal probe?
127
00:04:52,375 --> 00:04:54,002
That's when they put this
big metal hoop-a-joop
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00:04:54,127 --> 00:04:55,754
up your butt.
129
00:04:55,879 --> 00:04:57,506
Whoa, they gave you
an anal probe, Cartman?
130
00:04:57,631 --> 00:05:00,592
No, I mean...
why would they do that?
131
00:05:00,717 --> 00:05:02,052
Dude, they did, huh?
132
00:05:02,177 --> 00:05:03,345
Aliens stuck stuff up your ass.
133
00:05:03,470 --> 00:05:05,222
- No.
- An probe.
134
00:05:05,347 --> 00:05:06,723
Shut up, dildo.
135
00:05:06,848 --> 00:05:08,266
Well, I got to get to the cafeteria.
136
00:05:08,391 --> 00:05:09,851
You children watch that fat boy, now.
137
00:05:09,976 --> 00:05:11,853
He could be under alien control.
138
00:05:16,107 --> 00:05:17,442
We told you they were real, Cartman.
139
00:05:17,567 --> 00:05:19,236
Sorry to hear about your ass.
140
00:05:19,361 --> 00:05:21,279
God damn it, they didn't do
anything to my ass.
141
00:05:21,404 --> 00:05:23,156
It was just a dream.
142
00:05:26,117 --> 00:05:27,536
Why you walking so funny, Cartman?
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00:05:27,661 --> 00:05:29,037
Shut up.
144
00:05:29,162 --> 00:05:30,539
No, Ike, go home.
145
00:05:30,664 --> 00:05:32,874
This is it, this one's for the game.
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Kick the baby.
147
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Good morning, Miss Crabtree.
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Sit down, we're running late!
149
00:05:46,346 --> 00:05:47,681
Damn it, he's still there.
150
00:05:47,806 --> 00:05:49,307
Oh, don't worry about him.
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00:05:49,432 --> 00:05:50,934
No, dude,
if something happens to him,
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my parents are gonna blame me.
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00:05:52,519 --> 00:05:54,688
Sit down back there! Aah!
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Yeah, whatever, you fat bitch.
155
00:05:56,940 --> 00:05:58,108
What did you say?
156
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I said I have a bad itch.
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Oh.
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Oh, my God!
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Visitors.
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00:06:06,324 --> 00:06:09,452
Ike! Stop the bus!
161
00:06:09,578 --> 00:06:11,830
Miss Crabtree,
you have to stop this bus.
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00:06:11,955 --> 00:06:14,291
Do you want an office referral?
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00:06:14,416 --> 00:06:15,959
- No.
- Then sit down!
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But I...
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Aah!
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00:06:24,259 --> 00:06:26,636
Cartman, are those
the same visitors you saw?
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Shut up, you guys, it's not working.
168
00:06:28,638 --> 00:06:29,973
We have to do something.
169
00:06:30,098 --> 00:06:31,266
Well, we can't do anything for now.
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00:06:31,391 --> 00:06:32,601
That fat bitch won't let us.
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00:06:32,726 --> 00:06:34,436
What did you say?
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00:06:34,561 --> 00:06:36,563
I said that rabbits eat lettuce.
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Oh. Well, yes, they certainly do.
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00:06:41,526 --> 00:06:43,028
What am I gonna do?
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00:06:43,153 --> 00:06:44,946
My little brother's been
abducted by aliens.
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00:06:45,071 --> 00:06:46,364
You farted.
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00:06:48,199 --> 00:06:50,327
Somebody's baking brownies.
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♪ ♪
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That's the third cow this month.
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00:06:58,293 --> 00:07:00,712
At this rate,
all my cattle are gonna die
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00:07:00,837 --> 00:07:02,255
before the winter's through.
182
00:07:03,882 --> 00:07:05,383
This is nothing out of the unusual.
183
00:07:05,508 --> 00:07:09,095
Cows turn themselves
inside out all the time.
184
00:07:09,220 --> 00:07:12,474
People been saying they've
been seeing UFOs around.
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00:07:12,599 --> 00:07:14,309
UFOs?
186
00:07:14,434 --> 00:07:17,687
Yeah, and black army
CIA helicopters and trucks.
187
00:07:17,812 --> 00:07:21,024
That's the silliest thing
I've ever heard.
188
00:07:23,401 --> 00:07:24,694
What was that?
189
00:07:24,819 --> 00:07:26,571
That... that was a pigeon.
190
00:07:26,696 --> 00:07:28,573
What am I supposed to do, Barbrady?
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00:07:28,698 --> 00:07:31,034
Just stand here and watch my cattle
192
00:07:31,159 --> 00:07:32,869
get mutilated one by one?
193
00:07:37,415 --> 00:07:39,459
Hey, my cattle!
194
00:07:43,004 --> 00:07:44,381
You see?
195
00:07:44,506 --> 00:07:46,132
There is something funny going on.
196
00:07:46,257 --> 00:07:47,968
There's nothing funny going on.
197
00:07:48,093 --> 00:07:50,011
I'll get those cows back.
198
00:07:52,472 --> 00:07:53,974
And now, children,
199
00:07:54,099 --> 00:07:56,017
our friend Mr. Hat
is going to tell us
200
00:07:56,142 --> 00:07:57,811
about Christopher Columbus.
201
00:07:57,936 --> 00:07:59,729
That's right, Mr. Garrison,
202
00:07:59,854 --> 00:08:02,607
Christopher Columbus
discovered America,
203
00:08:02,732 --> 00:08:04,943
and was the Indians' best friend.
204
00:08:05,068 --> 00:08:07,445
He helped the Indians
win their war against
205
00:08:07,570 --> 00:08:08,989
Frederick Douglas,
206
00:08:09,114 --> 00:08:11,866
and freed the Hebrews from Napoleon.
207
00:08:11,992 --> 00:08:13,326
And discovered France.
208
00:08:13,451 --> 00:08:14,995
Oh, man. I can't just sit here.
209
00:08:15,120 --> 00:08:16,538
I have to help my stupid brother.
210
00:08:16,663 --> 00:08:17,956
I'll come home without him
211
00:08:18,081 --> 00:08:19,332
and my dad will start yelling,
212
00:08:19,457 --> 00:08:21,292
"Where's your brother, Kyle?
213
00:08:21,418 --> 00:08:23,128
You weren't looking out
for your little brother, Kyle."
214
00:08:23,253 --> 00:08:24,838
Okay, okay, let's ditch school
and go find him.
215
00:08:24,963 --> 00:08:26,006
"You know he can't think
on his own, Kyle.
216
00:08:26,131 --> 00:08:27,507
"Brush and floss, Kyle.
217
00:08:27,632 --> 00:08:28,925
Where has that finger been, Kyle?"
218
00:08:29,050 --> 00:08:30,135
Dude.
219
00:08:30,260 --> 00:08:31,636
Is there a problem, boys?
220
00:08:31,761 --> 00:08:33,138
Yes, Mr. Garrison, I have to go now.
221
00:08:33,263 --> 00:08:34,889
Oh really, Kyle?
222
00:08:35,015 --> 00:08:36,558
What is it this time,
another prostate tumor?
223
00:08:36,683 --> 00:08:38,768
No, my little brother's
been abducted by aliens.
224
00:08:40,186 --> 00:08:41,813
It's true. Ask Cartman.
225
00:08:41,938 --> 00:08:43,732
They gave him an anal probe.
226
00:08:43,857 --> 00:08:46,109
That's a little joke.
227
00:08:46,234 --> 00:08:48,695
Mr. Garrison, seriously,
I have to go.
228
00:08:48,820 --> 00:08:50,697
Can I please be excused from class?
229
00:08:50,822 --> 00:08:52,449
I don't know, Kyle.
Did you ask Mr. Hat?
230
00:08:52,574 --> 00:08:55,076
I don't want to ask Mr. Hat!
231
00:08:55,201 --> 00:08:56,661
I'm asking you!
232
00:08:56,786 --> 00:08:58,413
Oh, I think you should ask Mr. Hat.
233
00:08:58,538 --> 00:09:01,166
Mr. Hat, may I please
be excused from class?
234
00:09:01,291 --> 00:09:03,126
Well, Kyle, no.
235
00:09:03,251 --> 00:09:05,170
You hear me? You go to hell.
236
00:09:05,295 --> 00:09:06,963
You go to hell and you die.
237
00:09:07,088 --> 00:09:09,132
Hm, I guess you'll have
to take your seat, Kyle.
238
00:09:09,257 --> 00:09:10,467
Damn it.
239
00:09:10,592 --> 00:09:12,260
Ha-ha, Mr. Hat yelled at you.
240
00:09:12,385 --> 00:09:14,596
Ow, my ass!
241
00:09:14,721 --> 00:09:15,930
Damn, Cartman.
242
00:09:17,348 --> 00:09:19,059
Ow, my ass!
243
00:09:19,184 --> 00:09:20,727
Dude, he's farting fire.
244
00:09:20,852 --> 00:09:22,353
It's the alien anal probe.
245
00:09:22,479 --> 00:09:24,355
It's shooting fire
from Cartman's rectum.
246
00:09:24,481 --> 00:09:26,357
No, that was just a dream.
247
00:09:26,483 --> 00:09:27,942
Eric, do you need
to sit in the corner
248
00:09:28,068 --> 00:09:29,986
until your flaming gas
is under control?
249
00:09:30,111 --> 00:09:32,655
No, Mr. Garrison, I'm fine.
250
00:09:42,540 --> 00:09:45,960
♪ ♪
251
00:09:46,086 --> 00:09:48,379
Hey, you cows can't
get on this train.
252
00:09:48,505 --> 00:09:50,256
This is a people train.
253
00:09:50,381 --> 00:09:52,509
You cows have no business
on a people train, all right?
254
00:09:52,634 --> 00:09:54,552
'cause you're cows.
255
00:09:54,677 --> 00:09:56,346
No, no, no.
256
00:09:56,471 --> 00:09:59,599
Don't try any of that
cow hypnosis on me, all right?
257
00:09:59,724 --> 00:10:01,226
'Cause it's not gonna work.
258
00:10:01,351 --> 00:10:03,061
Hold it right there, cows.
259
00:10:04,521 --> 00:10:06,397
Come back here.
260
00:10:11,611 --> 00:10:13,822
Aah!
261
00:10:13,947 --> 00:10:15,907
Ooh. I sure am hungry.
262
00:10:16,032 --> 00:10:17,909
How can you eat
when you're farting fire?
263
00:10:18,034 --> 00:10:20,620
Shut up, dude,
you're being totally immature.
264
00:10:20,745 --> 00:10:22,455
Hey, look, there's Wendy Testaburger.
265
00:10:22,580 --> 00:10:24,541
Where?
266
00:10:27,669 --> 00:10:34,551
♪ ♪
267
00:10:40,807 --> 00:10:44,561
♪ Stan wants to kiss
Wendy Testaburger ♪
268
00:10:44,686 --> 00:10:46,563
Shut up, fat ass.
I don't even like her.
269
00:10:46,688 --> 00:10:49,107
I'm not fat and you
obviously like her
270
00:10:49,232 --> 00:10:51,067
because you throw up
every time she talks to you.
271
00:10:51,192 --> 00:10:52,443
I do not.
272
00:10:52,569 --> 00:10:54,487
- Hi, guys.
- Hi, Wendy.
273
00:10:54,612 --> 00:10:56,531
Here, Stan, this is for you.
274
00:10:56,656 --> 00:10:57,907
Eww.
275
00:10:58,032 --> 00:10:59,367
Bye, Wendy.
276
00:10:59,492 --> 00:11:01,786
Dude, what does the note say?
277
00:11:01,911 --> 00:11:03,496
Holy crap,
278
00:11:03,621 --> 00:11:05,456
it says she wants
to meet me at Stark's Pond
279
00:11:05,582 --> 00:11:06,916
after school.
280
00:11:07,041 --> 00:11:08,168
Whoa, maybe you can kiss her.
281
00:11:08,293 --> 00:11:09,419
Or slip her the tongue.
282
00:11:11,588 --> 00:11:14,424
What, how do you know
she has a cat?
283
00:11:18,720 --> 00:11:20,263
Come on, you guys,
284
00:11:20,388 --> 00:11:21,848
we need to figure out
how to get out of school
285
00:11:21,973 --> 00:11:23,349
so we can get my little brother back.
286
00:11:23,474 --> 00:11:24,976
- Hello there, children.
- Hey Chef.
287
00:11:25,101 --> 00:11:26,352
- How are you doing?
- Bad.
288
00:11:26,477 --> 00:11:27,937
- Why bad?
- Chef,
289
00:11:28,062 --> 00:11:29,189
have you ever had
something happen to you
290
00:11:29,314 --> 00:11:30,565
but nobody believed you?
291
00:11:30,690 --> 00:11:32,692
Oh, children, children.
292
00:11:32,817 --> 00:11:34,736
That's a problem
we've all had to face
293
00:11:34,861 --> 00:11:36,279
at some time or another.
294
00:11:36,404 --> 00:11:38,615
Here, let me sing you a little song.
295
00:11:38,740 --> 00:11:40,575
It might clear things up.
296
00:11:40,700 --> 00:11:44,412
♪ I'm gonna make love to you woman ♪
297
00:11:44,537 --> 00:11:47,957
♪ Gonna lay you down by the fire ♪
298
00:11:48,082 --> 00:11:50,877
♪ And caress your womanly body ♪
299
00:11:51,002 --> 00:11:54,339
♪ Make you moan and perspire ♪
300
00:11:54,464 --> 00:11:55,965
- ♪ Gonna get ♪
- Uh, Chef?
301
00:11:56,090 --> 00:11:57,634
- ♪ Those juices flowing ♪
- Chef.
302
00:11:57,759 --> 00:11:59,552
- ♪ We're making love baby ♪
- Chef!
303
00:11:59,677 --> 00:12:01,804
♪ Love baby
love love love love baby ♪
304
00:12:01,930 --> 00:12:02,805
Chef!
305
00:12:02,931 --> 00:12:05,600
Huh?
306
00:12:05,725 --> 00:12:07,769
- Do you feel better?
- No.
307
00:12:07,894 --> 00:12:09,938
Oh, come on, children,
what can be so bad?
308
00:12:10,063 --> 00:12:12,982
It's Salisbury steak day.
309
00:12:13,107 --> 00:12:14,609
Visitors took Kyle's baby brother.
310
00:12:14,734 --> 00:12:16,194
What?
311
00:12:16,319 --> 00:12:18,029
What the hell do you
think you're doing
312
00:12:18,154 --> 00:12:19,572
in school eating Salisbury steak?
313
00:12:19,697 --> 00:12:21,241
Go find him, damn it.
314
00:12:21,366 --> 00:12:22,617
Mr. Garrison won't
let us out of school.
315
00:12:22,742 --> 00:12:23,743
He thinks we're making it up.
316
00:12:23,868 --> 00:12:25,161
You are making it up.
317
00:12:30,250 --> 00:12:31,542
Whoa.
318
00:12:33,127 --> 00:12:34,879
- What?
- That was cool.
319
00:12:35,004 --> 00:12:38,049
It's some kind of symbionic
metamorphosis device.
320
00:12:38,174 --> 00:12:40,718
This can mean the visitors
want to communicate with us.
321
00:12:40,843 --> 00:12:42,470
Oh, I see.
322
00:12:42,595 --> 00:12:44,722
Now you're gonna join in
on the little joke, huh?
323
00:12:44,847 --> 00:12:47,725
It's no joke, children. This is big.
324
00:12:47,850 --> 00:12:49,602
Please, Chef,
if I don't get out of school
325
00:12:49,727 --> 00:12:51,187
and get my brother
back from the aliens,
326
00:12:51,312 --> 00:12:52,772
my parents are gonna disown me.
327
00:12:52,897 --> 00:12:54,774
Uh, hold on, now. Hold on, now.
328
00:12:54,899 --> 00:12:56,651
You got to help the children.
329
00:12:56,776 --> 00:12:58,987
Hey, you guys sure
are going a long way
330
00:12:59,112 --> 00:13:00,780
to try and scare me.
331
00:13:00,905 --> 00:13:02,365
I want my Salisbury steak!
332
00:13:02,490 --> 00:13:04,450
Fire drill, fire drill.
333
00:13:04,575 --> 00:13:05,994
Everybody out.
334
00:13:06,119 --> 00:13:07,870
Okay, children, this is your chance.
335
00:13:07,996 --> 00:13:09,706
Killer. Thanks, Chef.
336
00:13:11,040 --> 00:13:12,583
Man, oh, man.
337
00:13:12,709 --> 00:13:14,877
First contact with the alien visitors.
338
00:13:15,003 --> 00:13:16,504
I've got to get myself ready.
339
00:13:16,629 --> 00:13:18,339
♪ We got out of school ♪
340
00:13:18,464 --> 00:13:20,133
♪ No more school today ♪
341
00:13:20,258 --> 00:13:21,634
♪ We got out of school ♪
342
00:13:21,759 --> 00:13:23,136
Oh, you guys!
343
00:13:23,261 --> 00:13:24,846
My ass, seriously!
344
00:13:24,971 --> 00:13:26,848
Okay, Cartman,
you can stop farting fire now.
345
00:13:26,973 --> 00:13:29,142
I would if I could,
you son of a bitch.
346
00:13:29,267 --> 00:13:31,311
Okay, so how do we get
my little brother back?
347
00:13:31,436 --> 00:13:34,314
Hey, would you stop going on
about your little brother?
348
00:13:34,439 --> 00:13:36,065
I know it was just a dream.
349
00:13:36,190 --> 00:13:37,775
I know I didn't have an anal probe.
350
00:13:37,900 --> 00:13:40,320
And I know that
I'm not under alien control.
351
00:13:41,612 --> 00:13:43,323
♪ I love to singa ♪
352
00:13:43,448 --> 00:13:44,741
♪ About the moona
and the juna and the springa ♪
353
00:13:44,866 --> 00:13:46,367
♪ I love to singa ♪
354
00:13:46,492 --> 00:13:49,203
♪ About a sky of blue
or tea for two ♪
355
00:13:52,373 --> 00:13:53,708
What the hell was that?
356
00:13:53,833 --> 00:13:54,959
He is under alien control.
357
00:13:55,084 --> 00:13:56,252
That thing in his butt
358
00:13:56,377 --> 00:13:57,462
is linked up to the visitors.
359
00:13:57,587 --> 00:13:59,005
Oh, son of a bitch.
360
00:14:03,968 --> 00:14:05,219
You guys shut up.
361
00:14:05,345 --> 00:14:07,180
I'm not under alien control.
362
00:14:07,305 --> 00:14:09,098
Hey, if you visitors can hear me...
363
00:14:09,223 --> 00:14:10,516
- Hey.
- Bring me back
364
00:14:10,641 --> 00:14:11,893
my little brother, God damn it!
365
00:14:12,018 --> 00:14:14,520
Ow, that hurts, you butt licker!
366
00:14:14,645 --> 00:14:15,897
Kyle, look, it's them.
367
00:14:16,022 --> 00:14:18,232
Give me back my brother!
368
00:14:22,612 --> 00:14:25,073
Oh, my God, they killed Kenny!
369
00:14:25,198 --> 00:14:26,532
You bastards!
370
00:14:26,657 --> 00:14:28,117
Come back here!
371
00:14:28,242 --> 00:14:29,702
Come back!
372
00:14:29,827 --> 00:14:31,954
Damn it! We were so close.
373
00:14:32,080 --> 00:14:34,082
Hey, look, I think Kenny's okay.
374
00:14:36,584 --> 00:14:37,877
Oh.
375
00:14:45,635 --> 00:14:47,261
Wow, poor Kenny.
376
00:14:47,387 --> 00:14:48,304
Now do you believe us, Cartman?
377
00:14:48,429 --> 00:14:49,680
No.
378
00:14:49,806 --> 00:14:50,807
Cartman, they killed Kenny.
379
00:14:50,932 --> 00:14:52,100
He's not dead.
380
00:14:52,225 --> 00:14:54,185
Dude, Kenny is dead.
381
00:14:54,310 --> 00:14:55,812
See?
382
00:14:55,937 --> 00:14:57,021
Shut up, you guys.
383
00:14:57,146 --> 00:14:58,856
He's dead, Cartman.
384
00:14:58,981 --> 00:15:01,818
God damn it,
I didn't have an anal probe!
385
00:15:01,943 --> 00:15:03,820
Screw you guys. I'm going home.
386
00:15:03,945 --> 00:15:06,114
Go on and go home,
you fat chicken.
387
00:15:06,239 --> 00:15:07,240
Dildo!
388
00:15:08,491 --> 00:15:10,159
You're all I have left, Stan.
389
00:15:10,284 --> 00:15:11,869
Sorry, dude, I gotta go
meet Wendy Testaburger.
390
00:15:11,994 --> 00:15:14,372
You can't.
Poor Ike must be so scared.
391
00:15:14,497 --> 00:15:15,581
Up there all alone.
392
00:15:15,706 --> 00:15:16,791
You gotta help me dude.
393
00:15:16,916 --> 00:15:18,209
Dude, like Chef says,
394
00:15:18,334 --> 00:15:19,335
I gotta get a piece of loving
395
00:15:19,460 --> 00:15:20,962
while the getting's hot.
396
00:15:21,087 --> 00:15:22,797
Rats.
397
00:15:24,799 --> 00:15:25,967
Hello, Eric.
398
00:15:26,092 --> 00:15:27,176
Hi, Mom.
399
00:15:27,301 --> 00:15:28,428
How are you doing?
400
00:15:28,553 --> 00:15:30,388
Well, I'm pissed off.
401
00:15:30,513 --> 00:15:34,267
Here, I made you powdered
donut pancake surprise.
402
00:15:34,392 --> 00:15:36,060
I don't want powdered
donut pancake surprise.
403
00:15:36,185 --> 00:15:37,937
All the kids in school call me fat.
404
00:15:38,062 --> 00:15:40,148
You're not fat, you're big boned.
405
00:15:40,273 --> 00:15:41,816
That's what I said.
406
00:15:41,941 --> 00:15:44,110
You can have an eensy-weensy bit,
can't you?
407
00:15:44,235 --> 00:15:45,445
No.
408
00:15:45,570 --> 00:15:47,196
Just a weensy-eensy woo-woo?
409
00:15:47,321 --> 00:15:49,073
No, leave me alone, Mom.
410
00:15:49,198 --> 00:15:51,701
How about a nice chocolate
chicken pot pie then?
411
00:15:51,826 --> 00:15:54,996
But... well, that sounds pretty good.
412
00:15:55,121 --> 00:15:56,372
Uh, Mom?
413
00:15:56,497 --> 00:15:57,832
Yes, hon?
414
00:15:57,957 --> 00:15:59,333
If anybody calls or comes over,
415
00:15:59,459 --> 00:16:01,252
I'm not here, okay?
416
00:16:01,377 --> 00:16:02,670
Sure, hon.
417
00:16:02,795 --> 00:16:04,422
You want some Cheesy Poofs too?
418
00:16:04,547 --> 00:16:06,007
Yeah, I want Cheesy Poofs.
419
00:16:09,177 --> 00:16:11,137
Well, looks like she's not
gonna show up, Stan.
420
00:16:11,262 --> 00:16:12,638
Let's go look for the visitors now.
421
00:16:12,763 --> 00:16:13,973
But her note said she'd be here.
422
00:16:14,098 --> 00:16:15,600
Hi, Stan.
423
00:16:15,725 --> 00:16:17,018
Ew.
424
00:16:17,143 --> 00:16:18,102
You can't talk to Stan, Wendy.
425
00:16:18,227 --> 00:16:19,103
He throws up when you do.
426
00:16:19,228 --> 00:16:20,605
But why, Stan?
427
00:16:20,730 --> 00:16:22,398
Ew.
428
00:16:22,523 --> 00:16:23,900
Look, could you guys
just get down to business
429
00:16:24,025 --> 00:16:24,901
so we can find my little brother?
430
00:16:25,026 --> 00:16:26,444
Huh?
431
00:16:26,569 --> 00:16:28,029
Just make sweet love
down by the fire.
432
00:16:28,154 --> 00:16:29,822
What happened to your little brother?
433
00:16:29,947 --> 00:16:31,824
As the reports of
UFO sightings increase,
434
00:16:31,949 --> 00:16:34,076
more mysterious crop circle
patterns are appearing
435
00:16:34,202 --> 00:16:36,037
in fields all around South Park.
436
00:16:36,162 --> 00:16:38,039
These crop circles,
when viewed from above,
437
00:16:38,164 --> 00:16:40,583
form strange patterns.
438
00:16:40,708 --> 00:16:43,961
Hey, that kind of looks like...
Tom Selleck.
439
00:16:44,086 --> 00:16:45,671
Could it be that aliens are trying to
440
00:16:45,796 --> 00:16:47,798
make contact with us,
here on Earth?
441
00:16:52,094 --> 00:16:54,472
No, kitty, this is my pot pie.
442
00:16:54,597 --> 00:16:56,724
No, kitty, that's a bad kitty!
443
00:16:56,849 --> 00:16:59,227
No, kitty, this is my pot pie!
444
00:16:59,352 --> 00:17:02,897
Mom, kitty's being a dildo.
445
00:17:03,022 --> 00:17:05,983
Well, then I know
a certain kitty kitty
446
00:17:06,108 --> 00:17:08,569
who's sleeping with Mommy tonight.
447
00:17:08,694 --> 00:17:10,780
What?
448
00:17:10,905 --> 00:17:12,406
And now I have
to go home without him,
449
00:17:12,532 --> 00:17:14,367
and my parents
are gonna have me killed.
450
00:17:14,492 --> 00:17:16,494
Well, why didn't you go
get the fat kid?
451
00:17:16,619 --> 00:17:18,538
- Why?
- Well...
452
00:17:18,663 --> 00:17:21,457
if the fat kid has something
implanted in his ass,
453
00:17:21,582 --> 00:17:22,959
maybe the visitors are using him
454
00:17:23,084 --> 00:17:24,460
as part of their plan.
455
00:17:24,585 --> 00:17:26,295
You should use the fat kid as bait
456
00:17:26,420 --> 00:17:27,630
to bring them back.
457
00:17:27,755 --> 00:17:29,298
Hey, you're right, Wendy.
458
00:17:29,423 --> 00:17:31,717
Come on, Stan,
we have to go get Cartman.
459
00:17:31,842 --> 00:17:32,718
Come on, Stan.
460
00:17:32,843 --> 00:17:34,303
Ew.
461
00:17:34,428 --> 00:17:35,596
Hey, wait.
462
00:17:35,721 --> 00:17:37,723
When do I get to make sweet love?
463
00:17:42,520 --> 00:17:44,981
No, kitty, you can't have any.
464
00:17:46,524 --> 00:17:48,359
No, kitty, this is my pot pie!
465
00:17:48,484 --> 00:17:49,819
Bad kitty!
466
00:17:49,944 --> 00:17:51,445
Oh. Excuse me, kitty.
467
00:17:53,322 --> 00:17:54,782
Eric, look who's here.
468
00:17:54,907 --> 00:17:56,576
Dude, weak, Mom.
469
00:17:56,701 --> 00:17:57,910
Come on, Eric, we're gonna go play
at the bus stop.
470
00:17:58,035 --> 00:17:59,495
I can't. My mom says--
471
00:17:59,620 --> 00:18:00,913
That's okay, Eric.
472
00:18:01,038 --> 00:18:02,290
I think you need to spend time
473
00:18:02,415 --> 00:18:04,000
with your little friends.
474
00:18:04,125 --> 00:18:05,626
But Mom, I don't want
to spend time with my...
475
00:18:05,751 --> 00:18:07,295
Don't be difficult, Eric.
476
00:18:07,420 --> 00:18:10,214
Now, you go out and play
in the fun snow.
477
00:18:10,339 --> 00:18:11,424
God damn it.
478
00:18:14,093 --> 00:18:16,137
You guys, I have to get home.
479
00:18:16,262 --> 00:18:17,847
Don't be such a fraidy cat, Cartman.
480
00:18:17,972 --> 00:18:19,390
This rope will make sure
481
00:18:19,515 --> 00:18:21,809
they can't take you on board again.
482
00:18:21,934 --> 00:18:23,561
Oh, man, this sucks.
483
00:18:23,686 --> 00:18:25,229
How come the visitors
aren't coming for him?
484
00:18:25,354 --> 00:18:26,647
I think we have
to signal them somehow.
485
00:18:26,772 --> 00:18:28,774
Ow!
486
00:18:28,899 --> 00:18:31,068
Hey, he's like Rudolph.
487
00:18:31,193 --> 00:18:33,404
Yeah, all you have to do
is fart some more, Cartman,
488
00:18:33,529 --> 00:18:35,364
and the visitors are sure to come.
489
00:18:35,489 --> 00:18:37,033
Really?
490
00:18:37,158 --> 00:18:39,535
Uh, I don't think I have
to fart anymore tonight.
491
00:18:39,660 --> 00:18:40,703
Sure you do.
492
00:18:40,828 --> 00:18:41,912
Come on, Cartman, fart.
493
00:18:42,038 --> 00:18:43,456
I don't wanna.
494
00:18:43,581 --> 00:18:44,874
He can't hold it in forever.
495
00:18:44,999 --> 00:18:46,334
Fart, damn you!
496
00:18:46,459 --> 00:18:48,294
Okay, that does it.
497
00:18:48,419 --> 00:18:49,629
Now, listen,
498
00:18:49,754 --> 00:18:51,213
why is it that everything today
499
00:18:51,339 --> 00:18:53,049
has involved things either going in
500
00:18:53,174 --> 00:18:55,509
or coming out of my ass?
501
00:18:55,635 --> 00:18:56,844
I'm sick of it.
502
00:18:56,969 --> 00:18:58,429
It's completely immature.
503
00:18:58,554 --> 00:19:00,473
Hey, it's happening again.
504
00:19:02,933 --> 00:19:04,769
Whoa, look at that.
505
00:19:04,894 --> 00:19:06,103
Now do you believe us, Cartman?
506
00:19:06,228 --> 00:19:07,772
You guys can't scare me.
507
00:19:07,897 --> 00:19:09,440
I know you're making it all up.
508
00:19:09,565 --> 00:19:11,984
Cartman,
there's an 80-foot satellite dish
509
00:19:12,109 --> 00:19:13,736
sticking out of your ass.
510
00:19:13,861 --> 00:19:16,113
Sure, you guys. Whatever.
511
00:19:17,948 --> 00:19:19,492
Oh, boy,
512
00:19:19,617 --> 00:19:21,869
the aliens are going
to make first contact.
513
00:19:21,994 --> 00:19:23,996
Hey, down here!
514
00:19:24,121 --> 00:19:27,166
We are ready for your wisdom!
515
00:19:27,291 --> 00:19:29,126
And you only got 20 minutes
516
00:19:29,251 --> 00:19:31,921
before "Sanford and Son" is on.
517
00:19:32,046 --> 00:19:34,423
You guys, I am seriously
518
00:19:34,548 --> 00:19:36,676
getting pissed off right now!
519
00:19:36,801 --> 00:19:39,679
I know there's
no such thing as aliens!
520
00:19:41,722 --> 00:19:44,141
Oh, God damn it!
521
00:19:44,266 --> 00:19:46,060
What the--?
522
00:19:46,185 --> 00:19:49,063
I tell you, there's crazy stuff
going on in this town.
523
00:19:49,188 --> 00:19:52,108
You can say that again, Mr. Garrison.
524
00:19:52,233 --> 00:19:54,944
Come down here, you stinking aliens.
525
00:19:56,696 --> 00:19:57,571
Uh, uh...
526
00:19:57,697 --> 00:19:59,073
Go on, Kyle,
527
00:19:59,198 --> 00:20:00,282
ask them for your
little brother back.
528
00:20:00,408 --> 00:20:01,826
V-visitors,
529
00:20:01,951 --> 00:20:03,494
this morning you took
my brother, Ike.
530
00:20:03,619 --> 00:20:04,995
He's the little freckled kid
531
00:20:05,121 --> 00:20:06,580
that looks like a football.
532
00:20:06,706 --> 00:20:08,374
At first I was happy
you took him away.
533
00:20:08,499 --> 00:20:09,792
But I've learned something today.
534
00:20:09,917 --> 00:20:11,335
That having a little brother
535
00:20:11,460 --> 00:20:12,920
is a pretty special thing.
536
00:20:13,045 --> 00:20:14,714
- Yeah.
- Aw, heck, Mr. Visitors,
537
00:20:14,839 --> 00:20:16,674
I'm just a kid all alone
in this crazy world.
538
00:20:16,799 --> 00:20:18,134
But if you can find it in your hearts
539
00:20:18,259 --> 00:20:19,552
or whatever you have
540
00:20:19,677 --> 00:20:21,220
to give my brother back to me,
541
00:20:21,345 --> 00:20:23,389
it sure would make
my life brighter again.
542
00:20:23,514 --> 00:20:25,099
That was beautiful, dude.
543
00:20:25,224 --> 00:20:26,142
Did it work?
544
00:20:26,267 --> 00:20:27,601
Nope, they're leaving.
545
00:20:27,727 --> 00:20:29,520
Hey, you scrawny assed [bleep]!
546
00:20:29,645 --> 00:20:31,355
What the [bleep] is wrong with you?
547
00:20:31,480 --> 00:20:32,940
You must be some kind of [bleep]
548
00:20:33,065 --> 00:20:34,650
to be able to ignore a crying child!
549
00:20:34,775 --> 00:20:36,068
Whoa, dude.
550
00:20:36,193 --> 00:20:37,153
You know what you [bleep] like?
551
00:20:37,278 --> 00:20:39,405
You like to [bleep]...
552
00:20:42,116 --> 00:20:44,660
Hey, Wendy, what's a [bleep]?
553
00:20:47,705 --> 00:20:49,915
Ike, jump down, now!
554
00:20:50,040 --> 00:20:52,918
For the love of God, Ike, jump!
555
00:20:53,043 --> 00:20:54,503
Don't hurt me.
556
00:21:02,303 --> 00:21:03,512
Moo.
557
00:21:10,853 --> 00:21:12,396
Come on, Ike.
558
00:21:12,521 --> 00:21:14,523
I promise I'll be nice
to you from now on.
559
00:21:14,648 --> 00:21:15,941
Don't kick the baby.
560
00:21:22,031 --> 00:21:23,741
What the hell are they talking about?
561
00:21:32,291 --> 00:21:33,292
Ike!
562
00:21:38,839 --> 00:21:42,635
Ike, do your impersonation
of David Caruso's career!
563
00:21:42,760 --> 00:21:44,136
It's my turn.
564
00:21:56,649 --> 00:21:59,151
You guys, get me down from here!
565
00:21:59,276 --> 00:22:01,737
Help!
566
00:22:01,862 --> 00:22:02,988
Help!
567
00:22:03,113 --> 00:22:04,990
Sons a bitches!
568
00:22:05,115 --> 00:22:07,701
Dildo!
569
00:22:07,827 --> 00:22:10,037
Phew, I'm sure glad that's over with.
570
00:22:10,162 --> 00:22:12,206
Yeah, boy, am I glad to see you, Ike.
571
00:22:12,331 --> 00:22:14,542
Fly in the sky.
572
00:22:14,667 --> 00:22:16,085
Wait.
573
00:22:16,210 --> 00:22:17,962
Where are you going, alien visitors?
574
00:22:18,087 --> 00:22:19,588
Come back.
575
00:22:19,713 --> 00:22:21,131
Well, Chef,
where's this amazing thing
576
00:22:21,257 --> 00:22:22,675
you were gonna show us?
577
00:22:22,800 --> 00:22:24,301
Well, it's in the bedroom, ladies.
578
00:22:24,426 --> 00:22:25,302
Come on in.
579
00:22:25,427 --> 00:22:26,804
Come on, Ike,
580
00:22:26,929 --> 00:22:28,222
we can make it
just in time for dinner.
581
00:22:28,347 --> 00:22:29,223
Thanks for your help, Wendy.
582
00:22:29,348 --> 00:22:30,432
Whatever, dude.
583
00:22:30,558 --> 00:22:31,934
Hey, I didn't throw up.
584
00:22:32,059 --> 00:22:32,935
Cool.
585
00:22:36,230 --> 00:22:40,025
♪ ♪
586
00:22:40,150 --> 00:22:42,027
Ew.
587
00:22:42,152 --> 00:22:44,363
- Sorry.
- Hey, look, a French fry.
588
00:22:44,488 --> 00:22:46,448
- Cool.
- And what is that?
589
00:22:46,574 --> 00:22:47,700
I think it's part of a Cheesy Poof.
590
00:22:47,825 --> 00:22:49,535
Hey, what's that?
591
00:22:49,660 --> 00:22:51,579
- ♪ I'm gonna make love ♪
- That's a hamburger.
592
00:22:51,704 --> 00:22:52,830
- That's from like two days ago.
- ♪ To you woman ♪
593
00:22:52,955 --> 00:22:54,331
Well, hey, what about that?
594
00:22:54,456 --> 00:22:55,457
I don't know what the hell that is.
595
00:22:59,587 --> 00:23:01,088
Gee, the bus will be here any minute.
596
00:23:01,213 --> 00:23:02,673
And Cartman still isn't around.
597
00:23:02,798 --> 00:23:04,508
Yeah, we're running out of friends.
598
00:23:04,633 --> 00:23:05,885
I wonder what that thing was
599
00:23:06,010 --> 00:23:07,386
that the visitors gave the cows?
600
00:23:10,639 --> 00:23:13,100
Ha-ha, cows, I got you cornered.
601
00:23:13,225 --> 00:23:15,477
Let's see you get away now.
602
00:23:17,021 --> 00:23:18,731
♪ I love to singa ♪
603
00:23:18,856 --> 00:23:20,649
♪ About the moona
and the juna and the springa ♪
604
00:23:20,774 --> 00:23:22,401
♪ I love to singa ♪
605
00:23:22,526 --> 00:23:24,778
♪ About a sky of blue or tea for two ♪
606
00:23:26,155 --> 00:23:27,239
Oh, hey, Cartman.
607
00:23:27,364 --> 00:23:28,616
Wow, Cartman.
608
00:23:28,741 --> 00:23:29,909
The visitors dropped you off
609
00:23:30,034 --> 00:23:30,910
just in time to go to school.
610
00:23:31,035 --> 00:23:32,411
Oh, man,
611
00:23:32,536 --> 00:23:33,996
I had this crazy
nightmare last night.
612
00:23:34,121 --> 00:23:35,539
Really? What about?
613
00:23:35,664 --> 00:23:37,917
Well, I was standing out in a field
614
00:23:38,042 --> 00:23:40,377
and I had this huge satellite dish
615
00:23:40,502 --> 00:23:42,129
sticking out of my butt.
616
00:23:42,254 --> 00:23:44,465
And then there was
hundreds of cows and aliens
617
00:23:44,590 --> 00:23:46,467
and then I went up on the ship
618
00:23:46,592 --> 00:23:48,385
and Scott Baio gave me pink eye.
619
00:23:48,510 --> 00:23:49,470
That wasn't a dream, Cartman.
620
00:23:49,595 --> 00:23:50,596
That really happened.
621
00:23:50,721 --> 00:23:51,931
Oh, right.
622
00:23:52,056 --> 00:23:53,432
Why don't I have pink eye then?
623
00:23:53,557 --> 00:23:55,267
Cartman, you do have pink eye.
624
00:23:55,392 --> 00:23:57,645
Oh, son of a bitch.
43075
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