Original subtitles

[WHISTLE]

CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY TURNER ENTERTAINMENT GROUP AND U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION

YEAH!

4,820, 4,824,

OOH, I LIKE WHAT YOU'VE DONE WITH THAT TUNNEL.

4,831, 4,835.

THAT'S EVERYBODY.

4,837.

[DOORBELL RINGS]

HMM?

[DING DONG]

[RAPID RINGING]

HMM.

[DING DONG]

NOW, PLEASE!

[DING DONG]

AAH!

[DING DONG]

HEY, DOUBLE-D! WHAT TOOK YOU SO LONG?

OH, HELLO, EDDY.

SO WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

HEY, WAS THAT YOU RINGING MY DOORBELL?

WHO, ME?

NAH.

WAIT, EDDY. YOU KNOW THE RULES.

AW, COME ON, EDD. NOT AGAIN.

[GROAN] ALL RIGHT!

SHEESH! STUPID SLIPPERS.

AND I'LL DISPOSE OF THESE.

OK. THE SLIPPERS ARE ON NOW--

OOOFF!

WE'LL HAVE YOU CLEAN IN NO TIME, EDDY.

ALMOST DONE.

GEE, THANKS, EDD.

AFTER YOU, EDDY.

YEAH. AFTER ME.

WAAA-HOO!

EDDY!

MESSY, MESSY, MESSY...

PLEASE DON'T DO THAT, EDDY.

UHH!

EDDY!

PLEASE RETURN THOSE LABELS TO THEIR RIGHTFUL DESIGNATIONS.

ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT!

DON'T HAVE A BIRD.

ARE YOU DONE YET? LET'S GO GET ED!

PLEASE BE PATIENT.

I HAVE JUST ONE MORE--AAAAGH!

IT'S GONE!

EDDY!

SOMEONE TOOK MY MAGNIFYING GLASS.

I FEEL SO VIOLATED.

MAYBE YOU MISPLACED IT.

NEVER!

WHAT HAS BECOME OF THIS WORLD?

IS NOTHING SACRED?

EVERYTHING IS SOILED!

WHO WOULD DO SUCH A THING?

WHO WOULD VIOLATE THE SANCTITY OF SOMEBODY'S ROOM

WITH THEIR FILTHY HANDS? OH!

OH, EDDY-- I FEEL SICK!

OOH, I FEEL NAUSEOUS!

I CAN'T BREATHE!

THANK YOU. I NEEDED THAT.

ANYTIME, PAL.

YOU KNOW, YOU CAN'T

HAVE SOMEBODY TOUCHING YOUR STUFF.

IT JUST ISN'T RIGHT.

OK! RACE YOU TO ED'S PLACE!

WHOO!

THERE HE IS.

HUH HUH HUH...

OOH!

SHH.

[WHISPERS] Quit fooling around.

HEY, EDDY!

WHAT'S UP?

DOGPILE!

HIYA, DOUBLE-D.

YOU GUYS MAKE ME LAUGH.

[STOMPING]

WHERE IS SHE?

WHAT? WHO?

MY DOLLY.

POLLY POO POO, THAT'S WHO.

[SCREECHES]

I--I NEED MY DOLLY.

BUT SARAH, I DIDN'T TOUCH HER.

LIAR!

DON'T YOU LIE TO ME, YOU DOLLY STEALER!

YOU GOT TO LOVE THESE FAMILY MOMENTS.

IF YOU DON'T TELL ME WHERE SHE IS,

REALLY ANGRY!

[CRASH]

[COUGH COUGH]

UH...ED?

YEAH, EDDY?

AS MUCH AS I REALLY LOVE THE SMELL

OF YOUR STINKY PITS,

CAN YOU LET GO OF MY HEAD NOW?

YOU KNOW, SOMEONE HAS TOUCHED MY STUFF ALSO.

REALLY?

DON'T YOU SEE WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?

IT'S EPIDEMICAL.

DOUBLE-D'S MAGNIFYING GLASS,

SARAH'S DOLL.

OOF!

SOMEONE OR SOMETHING

IS TOUCHING EVERYBODY'S STUFF.

WE GOT TO SPREAD THE WORD.

WE HAVE TO WARN EVERYONE THAT'S THERE'S A--

A SERIAL TOUCHER ON THE LOOSE.

HOW ARE WE GOING TO DO THAT, EDDY?

HEY! I KNOW JUST WHAT TO DO!

HA HA HA HA HA!

ATTENTION, PLEASE!

HEY! BEWARE OF THE TOUCHER!

SERIAL TOUCHER ON THE LOOSE!

HIDE YOUR STUFF! HIDE YOUR VALUABLES!

SERIAL TOUCHER ON THE LOOSE!

THAT DIRTY TOUCHER TOOK MY DOLLY POO POO!

AAH! AAH!

IT'S TRUE. WON'T SOMEBODY HELP US?

[WORRIED CHATTER]

QUIET! QUIET!

EVERYONE JUST RELAX!

WE'VE GOT IT ALL UNDER CONTROL.

YEAH? WHAT CAN YOU DORKS DO ABOUT IT?

DORKS

ARE GONNA SOLVE THIS MYSTERY.

HA! I'D PAY MONEY TO SEE THAT.

ME, TOO.

YEAH, WE ALL WOULD.

WHAT DO YOU PROPOSE WE DO NOW?

OK, BOYS. HERE'S THE LANE, OK?

WE'LL START HERE,

THEN WE'LL CROSS THE STREET OVER BY THE CORNER STORE...

Edd: PLEASE DO NOT MOVE. THIS IS DELICATE WORK.

HA HA HA HA HA!

THERE'S NO WAY THE TOUCHER CAN RESIST THIS.

PERFECT.

SOMEONE'S COMING.

ED, DON'T MOVE.

AND STOP GIGGLING!

DORK!

DORK?

SHH! ED, SOMEBODY ELSE IS COMING.

WHATCHA DOING, ED?

OH, ED, I'M LIKING YOUR HAIRCUT.

WHAT'S THAT, PLANK? YOU WANT A FEEL, TOO?

OK.

ED'S BEEN TOUCHED. PULL! PULL!

[BELLS AND SIRENS]

AHA! DR. TOUCHER, I PRESUME?

WHOA! YOU GUYS ARE WEIRD!

GET HIM!

Eddy: COME ON!

WAY!

HE'S GETTING AWAY!

FOLLOW ME!

[PANT PANT]

UFF!

UHH!

AAH!

OH...OH...

THEY GOT ME, OLD BUDDY.

BUT YOU--YOU CAN STILL MAKE IT, PLANK!

RUN!

SAVE YOURSELF.

BE NICE! AWW!

HEY, JONNY, NICE HAIRCUT.

DOUBLE-D'S GOT A SURPRISE FOR YOU.

A LIE DETECTOR.

READY.

BETTER WATCH WHAT YOU SAY, JONNY.

YEAH, JONNY.

HEH HEH HEH...

YOU WOULDN'T LIE TO YOUR PALS NOW, WOULD YOU?

ED, LIGHT.

ALL RIGHT, JONNY. ENOUGH FOOLING AROUND.

SO, WHY DON'T YOU JUST TELL US WHERE EVERYBODY'S STUFF IS, HMM?

I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.

I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING!

WHAT'S THE WORD, DOUBLE-D?

[SNIFF SNIFF]

INCONCLUSIVE, EDDY.

ARRRGGH!

WELL, IF YOU WON'T TALK, MAYBE YOUR FRIEND WILL!

YOU MUST BE THE BRAINS, HUH?

WHERE'S THE STUFF, PLANKY? FESS UP!

OH...

SILENT, HUH?

AAAAAAGGGH!

SPLINTERS!

AAAH! LEAVE PLANK ALONE, EDDY!

[DING]

[SNIFF]

AS YOU CAN SEE, THE BOARD IS LYING.

WELL, PLANKY?

I THINK IT'S TIME WE TRIED OTHER METHODS.

THIS WILL MAKE YOU SWELL UP GOOD.

AW! OHH...

OHHH...

[DRIP DRIP DRIP]

[MOANING]

[DRIP DRIP DRIP]

[DRIP DRIP DRIP DRIP]

AAAAAH!

OK! OK! I DID IT! I TOOK EVERYONE'S STUFF!

NOW LET ME GO! I GOTTA GO TO THE BATHROOM!

YOU HEARD HIM, BOYS. CASE CLOSED.

AAH! OOH! EEE! AUGH!

AAH! OHH!

[JINGLES]

SO, BOYS,

WHAT'S BIG, ROUND, COSTS A NICKEL...

JAWBREAKERS! JAWBREAKERS!

NOW AWAY WE GO!

NOW JUST A ROTTEN MINUTE.

I FOUND MY DOLLY UNDER MY BED.

IT'S TRUE.

AND HERE SHE IS, SEE?

Edd: EXCUSE ME, EDDY,

AHEM, UPON FURTHER INSPECTION OF MY PERSON,

I SEEM TO HAVE COME ACROSS...

MY MAGNIFYING GLASS.

HELP!

HEH HEH...

THAT EDDY THINKS HE'S SO SMART.

WE KNOW YOU DIDN'T DO IT, JONNY.

THANK YOU...

HANG TIGHT, JONNY.

THIS WON'T HURT A BIT.

SHOULD WE FEEL GUILTY ABOUT JONNY'S PREDICAMENT?

NAH. YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY--

A LITTLE CHILDHOOD TRAUMA BUILDS CHARACTER.

OHH! AAH! WHOA!

COME ON! GET THE JAWBREAKERS!

Edd: NOT SO FAST, LITTLE FELLA.

I SAW THIS THING IN A MOVIE,

I MADE A THORAX.

ANTS--CHECK, MILLIPEDES, CHECK,

MOTHS--

YEAH. IT'S A BUG.

WELL, EDDY, THE TIME HAS ARRIVED

FOR MY MONTHLY INSECT EXPEDITION.

A PAIR OF GALOSHES AND STERILE GLOVES

TO AVOID BACTERIA AND GERMS.

OH, INSECTS BUG ME.

POUR VOU.

OK, READY!

CHECK!

[INFLATES]

[CRASH]

SO, LET US PROCEED TO THE FOREST.

FOLLOW NATURE BOY.

ISN'T IT MAGNIFICENT?

ALL THE SPLENDORS OF NATURE,

DISPLAYED IN ONE GIANT PETRI DISH FULL OF LIFE!

[GULP]

I THINK I SWALLOWED A BUG.

[CRACK]

WHAT WAS THAT?

[OWL HOOTING]

THAT'S IT!

THIS NATURE STUFF'S FOR THE BIRDS!

WHOAAAAAH!

EDDY? EDDY?

WHOA, WAY BIG!

IT'S A MASTERPIECE OF NATURE.

LOOKS LIKE MY GRANDMOTHER'S HAIR NET.

WELL, LET'S GO, GUYS.

ED!

GET DOWN, YOU MANIAC!

YEE-HA! IT'S STICKY!

YOU'RE DISTURBING THE ECO-ENVIRONMENT.

[LAUGHTER]

UH, WHAT WAS THAT?

NOW YOU'VE DONE IT. ED, I SUGGEST--

[LAUGHTER]

[GULP]

Voices: ED, EDD, AND EDDY,

SITTING IN A TREE,

K-I-S-S-I-N-G!

ED! GET OFF THAT THING!

HUH?

[LAUGHTER]

HELP ME, GUYS!

I DON'T WANT THE FLUIDS DRAINED FROM MY BODY!

HOLD ON, ED!

WE'LL RESCUE YOU!

[GRUNTS]

ED, EDD, AND EDDY,

SITTING IN A TREE,

K-I-S-S-I-N-G!

[CRASH]

[LAUGHTER]

AAAAAAAH!

ED, EDD, AND EDDY,

SITTING IN A TREE,

K-I-S-S-I-N-G!

K-I-S-S-I-N-G!

K-I-S-S-I-N-G!

AAAAAAAAH!

THERE'S A WAY OUT! THROUGH THE TREES!

AAAAAAAAH!

[SPUTTERING]

HELP! QUICKSAND! HELP!

MY EYES!

[LAUGHTER]

AAH! AAH! AAH!

HEY, ED. SO HAPPY YOU DROPPED IN.

HOPE YOU LIKE OUR DAD'S ROBES.

HUH?

HOW DID WE GET INTO THESE?

HUH!

EEEEYAAAAH!

[LAUGHING]

THIS IS NOT GOOD.

GO AHEAD, YELL. NO ONE WILL HEAR YOU.

I'M MAY KANKER.

I'M MARIE KANKER.

AND I'M LEE KANKER. WE'RE THE KANKER SISTERS.

WE JUST MOVED IN.

I'M EDDY.

I'M ED.

I'M--

WE KNOW, DOUBLE-D.

DON'T YOU WORRY ABOUT THAT.

UH, DO YOU GIRLS KNOW WHERE OUR CLOTHES ARE?

THEY'RE DRYING OUTSIDE.

YOU BOYS SURE WERE DIRTY.

HUH?

WE'RE GONNA POP INTO THE KITCHEN FOR A BIT, BOYS,

AND FIX UP SOME HOME COOKING FOR YA.

WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

HEY! WAIT FOR ME!

THIS IS VERY STRANGE. LET'S GO.

HOLD IT, DOUBLE-D.

WHERE'S YOUR MANNERS?

THEY'RE NEW HERE.

AND THEY SAID THEY WERE GONNA MAKE US SOME FOOD,

DIDN'T THEY?

SO, WHY DON'T WE JUST HANG OUT FOR A BIT,

EAT FOR FREE, AND THEN WE CAN SPLIT.

COME ON, LET'S CHECK THIS PLACE OUT.

WHERE EXACTLY ARE WE?

LOOKS LIKE A POSTCARD I SENT MY BROTHER ONCE.

AH, TV!

AW, IT'S A RERUN.

NICE SPACE HELMET.

TAKE ME TO YOUR PLUMBER.

NICE HEAD, ED.

GET IT? IT RHYMES!

"HEAD", "ED".

I CRACK ME UP.

HUBCAP DIGEST.

THIS BOOK HAS NO PRINT.

THESE PAGES ARE BLANK!

HA HA HA! LOOK! HA HA HA!

ARTWORK!

IT'S ED AND MAY! HOW CUTE!

Edd: IS THAT ME?

WHAT THE--

AAAAAAGH!

THAT'S NOT FUNNY!

Marie: OK, BOYS.

COME AND GET SOME NICE, COLD, DELICIOUS POWDERED MILK.

Ed: THANKS. Edd: THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

[COUGH COUGH]

Marie: HOW ABOUT A VIDEO?

FISHBOWL 2-- A CLASSIC.

AH. AH. AH.

IT'S SO NICE TO HAVE THE BOYS HOME.

DOING THE FISH STICKS!

THEN GIVE ME THE SQUEEZE-IT LOG!

GIRLS, SHUT UP!

WE GOT LUNCH TO MAKE.

THE WAY TO A MAN'S HEART IS THROUGH HIS ARTERIES.

AND A LITTLE KANKER SECRET SAUCE--

KETCHUP!

DINNER'S READY!

AHH...

AHH...

THEY'RE SO DREAMY.

HA HA HA HA HA!

BE BACK IN A MINUTE, BOYS.

YEAH. WE'RE GONNA GO AND FRESHEN UP.

AHH...

[BURP]

HEE HEE HEE HEE.

WE'RE BACK!

NOTICE ANYTHING NEW, EDDY?

THE FINEST IN PROCESSED PRODUCTS.

ONLY THE BEST FOR YOU.

HEY, HOW ABOUT A REFILL ON THAT POWDERED MILK STUFF?

DO YOU LIKE OUR KANKER BURGER,

BIG ED?

IT'S GOOD. YEAH!

DON'T TALK WITH YOUR MOUTH FULL, MISTER!

AAH!

PLEASE REFRAIN FROM TOUCHING ME WHEN I'M EATING.

THANK YOU.

HMMP!

I'LL TOUCH YOU WHENEVER I WANT, BUDDY BOY!

IS THERE A PROBLEM?

EVERYTHING'S FINE!

HEY, MOVE IT! OUT OF THE WAY!

THIS IS THE BEST PART!

MOVE IT?

IT'S NOT GOOD ENOUGH THAT WE'VE WORKED HARD

AND BROKEN OUR BACKS FOR YOU?

HUH?

IF THINGS DON'T CHANGE AROUND HERE, WE'RE LEAVING!

IT'S TIME YOU GOOD-FOR-NOTHINGS

STARTED TO PULL OUR OWN WEIGHT AROUND HERE!

WHAT'S UP WITH THEM?

CLEAN THIS MESS UP RIGHT NOW!

Lee: HEY! OVER HERE!

CLEAN THIS MESS!

HEY!

YOU CALL THAT CLEAN?

GET WASHING!

AND SCRUBBING!

COME ALONG, LITTLE MAN!

TIME TO CLEAN UP!

AAH!

HEH HEH HEH.

AND YOU!

MAKE IT SHINE!

ED, YOU'VE RUINED MY DISHES.

HEADING OUTSIDE, EDDY.

SLACKER.

THAT BETTER BE FIGHTING OVER ME I HEAR IN THERE!

I'M GOING TO SANITIZE THE LIVING AREA.

Eddy: OK.

I'LL CLEAN THIS.

I'LL CLEAN EVERYTHING!

SHINE IT UP NICE.

HEH HEH HEH.

Girls: HEY, MUD-TRACKER!

YOU'RE TRACKING MUD!

MUD?

UH-OH.

UHH!

YOU BETTER NOT WRECK DADDY'S BUCKET.

HANG THESE OUTSIDE.

OK, EDDY!

Lee: YOU SAILORS ARE ALL ALIKE.

[SILENCE]

YOU SHOULD GO BACK TO DIVING FOR CLAMS.

THAT'S ENOUGH!

[WHIMPERING]

OK.

[WHIMPERING]

THIS IS THE THANKS WE GET FOR OUR HARD WORK?

[CRYING]

UH-OH.

US GIRLS HAVE GOT TO GET OURSELVES TOGETHER.

HAVEN'T YOU DONE ENOUGH DAMAGE ALREADY?

NOW GET OUT OF HERE!

AND NEVER COME BACK!

WELL, YOU HEARD HER.

LET'S GO.

THIS HAS BEEN QUITE EDUCATIONAL.

HELLO, FREEDOM.

AAAAAAAGGGH!

JUST A MINUTE THERE--

WHAT ABOUT EDDY JUNIOR?

HA HA HA!

AND ED JUNIOR?

DON'T FORGET DOUBLE-D JUNIOR!

AAAAH! AAAAH! AAAAH!

THAT'S IT!

RUN FOR IT!

AAAAAAAH!

THAT'S IT-- RUN, YOU COWARDS!

GET LOST!

AND DON'T TRIP ON YOUR SHOELACES.

OH, LOOK AT THEM RUN.

JUST LIKE A REAL MAN.

I THINK I'M IN L-U-V, LOVE!

OHH... OHH... OHH...

[LAUGHTER]

CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY TURNER ENTERTAINMENT GROUP AND U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION

ED, EDD, AND EDDY!

YEAH!

CAPTIONING PERFORMED BY THE NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE, INC.