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1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:04,162
WWW.MY-SUBS.CO
1
00:01:20,998 --> 00:01:21,999
There he is.
2
00:01:22,082 --> 00:01:24,835
Knew I'd get a handsome man in here
if I waited around long enough.
3
00:01:24,918 --> 00:01:26,670
Had to patch a tire
out on County Line.
4
00:01:26,753 --> 00:01:27,754
Too good for a tow?
5
00:01:27,838 --> 00:01:28,922
Too impatient.
6
00:01:29,006 --> 00:01:31,633
You city folk. Always in a hurry.
7
00:01:31,717 --> 00:01:33,510
By God, look who it is!
8
00:01:33,594 --> 00:01:35,178
- He's back!
- Hey!
9
00:01:35,262 --> 00:01:36,263
Welcome back, brother!
10
00:01:36,847 --> 00:01:39,808
Don't know why I ever leave.
A place to bowl, a place to fish.
11
00:01:39,891 --> 00:01:41,810
And a beer to hold doing it!
12
00:01:44,438 --> 00:01:45,439
Best friends!
13
00:01:45,522 --> 00:01:46,607
We love you, Ted!
14
00:01:46,690 --> 00:01:48,400
Ted!
15
00:02:20,807 --> 00:02:22,726
You still selling PVC?
16
00:02:22,809 --> 00:02:23,977
How's-how's business down there?
17
00:02:24,061 --> 00:02:25,687
Good enough to get me back up here.
18
00:02:25,771 --> 00:02:26,772
Think you could put in a word?
19
00:02:26,855 --> 00:02:28,690
Son, you don't wanna sell pipe.
20
00:02:28,774 --> 00:02:30,025
He just wants to lay some.
21
00:02:31,985 --> 00:02:33,654
Good to have you back, brother.
22
00:02:34,696 --> 00:02:35,822
Split a sixer?
23
00:02:38,200 --> 00:02:40,035
Marjorie's keeping the place
open late now?
24
00:02:40,118 --> 00:02:42,454
Yeah. Her mother passed
a few months back.
25
00:02:42,537 --> 00:02:43,830
Don't think she wants to go home.
26
00:02:44,414 --> 00:02:46,041
Everybody's runnin' from something.
27
00:02:51,213 --> 00:02:52,673
How's Luisa?
She still kick you out of bed
28
00:02:52,756 --> 00:02:54,383
- when you drink?
- Yep.
29
00:02:54,466 --> 00:02:55,759
Might as well keep drinking.
30
00:02:58,261 --> 00:02:59,846
Open the register
and gimme your wallet!
31
00:03:02,808 --> 00:03:03,809
No, no, no.
32
00:03:11,316 --> 00:03:14,111
- Teddy?
- Hello. There's a robbery.
33
00:03:14,194 --> 00:03:16,154
I think this guy's having
a heart attack.
34
00:03:16,238 --> 00:03:18,073
Ted, where you going?
35
00:03:18,156 --> 00:03:19,866
Hey! The cops are coming.
36
00:03:19,950 --> 00:03:21,535
Ted! Teddy!
37
00:03:21,618 --> 00:03:23,412
This guy's dying in here!
38
00:03:42,556 --> 00:03:44,433
- Alright, well, shit.
- What the hell? What the hell?!
39
00:03:44,516 --> 00:03:46,893
Looks like you learned
some things about your body.
40
00:03:46,977 --> 00:03:48,520
I'll make this simple, Ted.
41
00:03:48,603 --> 00:03:51,106
You're not a PVC salesman
from two states south.
42
00:03:51,189 --> 00:03:52,691
You're the smartest man
who's ever lived,
43
00:03:52,774 --> 00:03:54,818
and you were born
400 light-years away.
44
00:03:54,901 --> 00:03:56,319
You're on Beloi-6E.
45
00:03:56,403 --> 00:03:58,238
It's a primitive planet
with good country music
46
00:03:58,321 --> 00:04:01,241
and a shit-ton of snow,
real early '90s Earth vibes.
47
00:04:01,324 --> 00:04:02,784
They're 100 years from first contact,
48
00:04:02,868 --> 00:04:05,203
so they don't know who I am,
who you are.
49
00:04:05,287 --> 00:04:06,538
Which is the whole point.
50
00:04:06,621 --> 00:04:08,540
You think it's fun to be a god, Ted?
51
00:04:08,623 --> 00:04:11,084
You think God's nipples get hard
when he murders a fish?
52
00:04:11,168 --> 00:04:12,377
Th-That's why every summer
53
00:04:12,461 --> 00:04:14,045
I take two weeks off and come here.
54
00:04:14,129 --> 00:04:16,631
I wipe my brain and pull all
but my survival tech.
55
00:04:20,051 --> 00:04:22,053
I go home with the peace
of mind stupid people get
56
00:04:22,137 --> 00:04:23,847
from watching Kevin Costner movies.
57
00:04:23,930 --> 00:04:26,892
So, look, if you're seeing this
because shit's gone sideways,
58
00:04:26,975 --> 00:04:28,477
hit the red button to be me again.
59
00:04:28,560 --> 00:04:30,228
If everything's cool,
hit the blue button
60
00:04:30,312 --> 00:04:32,606
to clear this from your memory
and enjoy the rest of your trip.
61
00:04:32,689 --> 00:04:34,191
Okay, Morty, that's a wrap on
62
00:04:34,274 --> 00:04:35,776
"If you've been
messing with my tech."
63
00:04:35,859 --> 00:04:37,903
Let's run the Taken scenarios.
64
00:04:54,836 --> 00:04:56,922
You here about the dishwasher job?
65
00:04:57,506 --> 00:04:59,591
Shit, you're a popsicle.
66
00:05:03,595 --> 00:05:06,515
You know me, right?
67
00:05:07,974 --> 00:05:09,684
I'd sure like to think so.
68
00:05:09,768 --> 00:05:11,269
I mean it. How could you?
69
00:05:11,353 --> 00:05:13,897
I'm just some guy
who shows up every year.
70
00:05:13,980 --> 00:05:16,107
Well, something keeps you
coming back here.
71
00:05:17,400 --> 00:05:19,027
Lay back. I got a surprise for you.
72
00:05:20,529 --> 00:05:22,531
Got this set up
since your last visit.
73
00:05:24,950 --> 00:05:25,951
It's nice.
74
00:05:26,034 --> 00:05:28,370
Haven't really found occasion
to use it.
75
00:05:28,453 --> 00:05:29,704
Thanks for giving me one.
76
00:05:30,247 --> 00:05:31,540
I don't mind the company.
77
00:05:33,500 --> 00:05:35,168
You still have
that spare room in back?
78
00:05:35,252 --> 00:05:37,003
I don't want to sleep in the RV.
79
00:05:49,850 --> 00:05:50,976
Don't go.
80
00:05:51,726 --> 00:05:52,811
I'm not gonna.
81
00:06:03,113 --> 00:06:05,240
Okay, obviously,
you're seeing this hologram
82
00:06:05,323 --> 00:06:07,325
because you ignored the
instructions from the last one.
83
00:06:07,409 --> 00:06:09,411
If you're seeing this hologram,
you decided to ignore the hologram.
84
00:06:09,494 --> 00:06:10,954
It'd mean you went pretty rogue.
85
00:06:11,037 --> 00:06:12,581
So just a gentle reminder,
86
00:06:12,664 --> 00:06:15,041
you're not a real person, you're me.
87
00:06:15,125 --> 00:06:17,085
You're permanently fucking up
your vacation spot,
88
00:06:17,168 --> 00:06:18,837
which hurts you more
than it hurts me.
89
00:06:18,920 --> 00:06:22,215
Though, in all honesty, we're both
getting hurt pretty severely…
90
00:06:27,178 --> 00:06:29,306
Ted, one of these days,
you gotta come up in July.
91
00:06:29,389 --> 00:06:32,684
I caught a muskie last summer
came about up to my neck.
92
00:06:32,767 --> 00:06:34,603
- Stop lying to the man.
- No fish in this lake.
93
00:06:34,686 --> 00:06:36,730
Actually, thought
I might stick around this year.
94
00:06:36,813 --> 00:06:38,440
- See the thaw.
- For real, Teddy?
95
00:06:38,523 --> 00:06:39,941
You're gonna… You're gonna stay?
96
00:06:40,025 --> 00:06:41,234
What about your company?
97
00:06:41,318 --> 00:06:42,736
Doesn't seem real.
98
00:06:42,819 --> 00:06:46,656
It's like I've been pretending
I go somewhere when I leave,
99
00:06:46,740 --> 00:06:49,451
but I think I only exist
when I'm here.
100
00:06:49,534 --> 00:06:52,662
Like this is literally
the only place I'm actually alive.
101
00:06:54,164 --> 00:06:56,207
Does that… make sense?
102
00:06:56,291 --> 00:06:58,126
Good thing nobody's driving tonight.
103
00:07:01,838 --> 00:07:03,006
Hey!
104
00:07:24,527 --> 00:07:25,779
Fuck me.
105
00:07:26,696 --> 00:07:28,823
- Hello? Rick? Rick!
- Who is this?
106
00:07:28,907 --> 00:07:30,367
I'm really gonna
get in trouble for this.
107
00:07:30,450 --> 00:07:32,035
How are you calling my leg?
108
00:07:32,118 --> 00:07:33,370
I'm not supposed to ever
use the leg phone,
109
00:07:33,453 --> 00:07:35,330
but I-I just need you
to get in the egg.
110
00:07:36,539 --> 00:07:38,375
Don't pick a fight
with yourself, okay?
111
00:07:38,458 --> 00:07:40,502
I just want to get you home
before anything worse happens.
112
00:07:40,585 --> 00:07:43,088
Nothing's worse
than finding out I'm some character
113
00:07:43,171 --> 00:07:45,590
that asshole plays,
some costume he puts on to…
114
00:07:45,674 --> 00:07:47,550
He doesn't need you alive
to bring you home.
115
00:07:47,634 --> 00:07:49,636
It's not my home! I'm not him!
116
00:07:49,719 --> 00:07:51,972
You are. I mean, I agree with you.
117
00:07:52,055 --> 00:07:54,557
He can be kind of a dick,
but y'know, this…
118
00:07:54,641 --> 00:07:55,976
this is just how it is.
119
00:07:57,060 --> 00:07:58,645
No! Help! Help!
120
00:07:58,728 --> 00:08:00,522
And if you could just hang up
the leg phone?
121
00:08:00,605 --> 00:08:01,856
I'll just…
I'll never hear the end of it
122
00:08:01,940 --> 00:08:03,149
if the leg phone gets lost.
123
00:08:03,733 --> 00:08:05,610
Hello? Hello?
124
00:08:07,946 --> 00:08:09,114
Ted!
125
00:08:10,115 --> 00:08:11,116
Ted, are you okay?
126
00:08:12,534 --> 00:08:14,577
- Thank you.
- What is this thing, Ted?
127
00:08:14,661 --> 00:08:16,705
I'm not who you think I am.
128
00:08:16,788 --> 00:08:19,499
Is this your ship from space?
129
00:08:19,582 --> 00:08:21,042
Your spaceship?
130
00:08:21,126 --> 00:08:22,293
It's his.
131
00:08:22,377 --> 00:08:24,504
He's non-vacation me.
132
00:08:24,587 --> 00:08:26,715
I don't know him.
And I don't want to.
133
00:08:26,798 --> 00:08:28,258
But this asshole's coming for me
134
00:08:28,341 --> 00:08:30,468
and I don't intend to let him win.
135
00:08:31,302 --> 00:08:32,303
For the love of Pete.
136
00:08:32,387 --> 00:08:34,180
Do you understand what you're asking?
137
00:08:34,264 --> 00:08:36,391
I wouldn't ask at all
if there were any other way.
138
00:08:38,435 --> 00:08:41,062
Janice, Mary, I gotta send you home.
139
00:08:41,146 --> 00:08:42,230
We're closing early.
140
00:08:42,313 --> 00:08:45,942
- Come on!
- We're only three frames in!
141
00:08:47,819 --> 00:08:48,862
Thank you.
142
00:08:50,363 --> 00:08:52,240
Nobody gonna take me seriously.
143
00:08:52,323 --> 00:08:53,992
Janice's gonna have her word…
144
00:08:54,075 --> 00:08:56,661
Promise me you won't
come back here tonight.
145
00:08:56,745 --> 00:08:58,455
Always were dramatic.
146
00:08:58,538 --> 00:08:59,539
Promise.
147
00:09:00,415 --> 00:09:03,960
I just…
Don't die in my bowling alley.
148
00:09:04,044 --> 00:09:05,628
You hear me?
149
00:09:11,301 --> 00:09:12,594
Holy hell.
150
00:09:12,677 --> 00:09:15,805
- How's it going out there, Bowser?
- All good.
151
00:09:18,558 --> 00:09:19,726
Sprinklers, Antonio?
152
00:09:19,809 --> 00:09:21,394
Working on it. Little Mike?
153
00:09:25,440 --> 00:09:26,649
Okay, Big Mike.
154
00:09:44,626 --> 00:09:46,086
Now!
155
00:09:56,179 --> 00:09:58,389
We need those sprinklers, Antonio!
156
00:09:59,224 --> 00:10:00,934
It's not working.
157
00:10:01,810 --> 00:10:03,394
- There's too many!
- Fry 'em!
158
00:10:08,316 --> 00:10:09,442
Mike!
159
00:10:11,528 --> 00:10:13,488
Follow me, ya drone bastards!
160
00:10:18,368 --> 00:10:19,828
Teddy, drop!
161
00:10:26,751 --> 00:10:28,753
- Yes!
- Come on! Rack' em up!
162
00:10:28,837 --> 00:10:29,838
Time for a beer!
163
00:10:29,921 --> 00:10:32,257
Fuck you, you self-centered prick!
164
00:10:32,340 --> 00:10:34,384
Who's not a real person now, huh?
165
00:10:38,179 --> 00:10:39,180
Marjorie!
166
00:10:39,764 --> 00:10:41,182
Why'd you come back?
167
00:10:41,266 --> 00:10:43,268
I told you not to come back.
168
00:10:43,351 --> 00:10:44,936
You know me.
169
00:10:45,019 --> 00:10:47,147
I'm a stubborn old bitch.
170
00:10:48,064 --> 00:10:49,732
Never could leave.
171
00:10:52,110 --> 00:10:53,111
Oh, my God.
172
00:10:53,194 --> 00:10:54,821
I'm… sorry.
173
00:10:58,825 --> 00:11:00,618
Where you going, Teddy?
174
00:11:12,630 --> 00:11:14,257
Uh… Ted?
175
00:11:14,340 --> 00:11:16,259
He thought he could come here
and destroy me,
176
00:11:16,342 --> 00:11:18,595
so I'm gonna go there
and destroy him.
177
00:11:18,678 --> 00:11:20,013
Whattaya need from us?
178
00:11:20,096 --> 00:11:21,306
I need you to leave.
179
00:11:21,389 --> 00:11:22,682
I clearly can't keep you safe.
180
00:11:22,765 --> 00:11:24,225
I can't keep anyone safe!
181
00:11:24,809 --> 00:11:27,020
Well, we won't let
Marjorie die for nothing.
182
00:11:27,103 --> 00:11:29,355
Yeah, he may be
one bad son of a bitch,
183
00:11:29,439 --> 00:11:30,899
but you have us.
184
00:11:30,982 --> 00:11:32,901
Where you go, we go.
185
00:11:47,040 --> 00:11:49,500
There you are, motherfucker.
186
00:12:20,865 --> 00:12:23,284
Uh, how long has it been
since you flew, Mike?
187
00:12:23,368 --> 00:12:25,453
I never flew anything like this.
188
00:12:25,536 --> 00:12:27,080
We'll be okay.
189
00:12:27,914 --> 00:12:30,250
Luisa, te veré de nuevo.
190
00:12:36,589 --> 00:12:39,968
Boosters are go. Nav system, go.
Big Mike, on my count.
191
00:12:40,051 --> 00:12:42,262
Initiating in three, two, one.
192
00:12:50,061 --> 00:12:51,521
Up the pressure!
193
00:12:51,604 --> 00:12:53,648
It's not responding!
We gotta turn back!
194
00:12:53,731 --> 00:12:55,275
We can't turn back!
195
00:12:56,192 --> 00:12:58,111
Keep her together!
196
00:12:58,194 --> 00:13:02,156
Equalizing now!
We're almost clear of orbit!
197
00:13:02,240 --> 00:13:04,492
Hold her! Hold her!
198
00:13:10,456 --> 00:13:12,041
Are you seeing this?
199
00:13:12,125 --> 00:13:14,002
It's amazing.
200
00:13:17,588 --> 00:13:20,300
That was the easy part.
Hold on to your dicks.
201
00:13:32,437 --> 00:13:35,940
Okay, if you're… if you're
seeing this one,
202
00:13:36,024 --> 00:13:39,235
clearly the-the holograms
are-are… they're not working.
203
00:13:39,944 --> 00:13:41,279
Let's get him, boys!
204
00:13:44,490 --> 00:13:47,243
Forcibly deactivating vacation mode.
205
00:14:01,007 --> 00:14:03,718
Whatever you're doing out here
has broken the garbage disposal.
206
00:14:03,801 --> 00:14:05,511
Turn this thing off, or I fry her!
207
00:14:05,595 --> 00:14:08,348
Dad, do you want to call off
Deliverance here?
208
00:14:08,431 --> 00:14:10,475
My God. You're his daughter?
209
00:14:10,558 --> 00:14:12,894
It's unbelievable that
I'm not allowed to buy alcohol yet.
210
00:14:12,977 --> 00:14:15,271
Garage, override
code Charlie 7 alpha.
211
00:14:16,814 --> 00:14:18,066
Take her out, Mike!
212
00:14:18,149 --> 00:14:19,650
Wait! Don't hurt her.
213
00:14:19,734 --> 00:14:20,777
Jeez, you're back!
214
00:14:20,860 --> 00:14:24,655
Oh, wait.
Are you still Vacation Rick?
215
00:14:24,739 --> 00:14:25,990
Please tell me you have
the leg phone.
216
00:14:26,074 --> 00:14:28,910
You spring breakers
put a hole in my roof.
217
00:14:28,993 --> 00:14:30,787
I'm going back out to the pool.
218
00:14:30,870 --> 00:14:33,373
Hey, buddy, you made it
all the way home.
219
00:14:33,456 --> 00:14:35,416
And you brought your…
your little buds.
220
00:14:35,500 --> 00:14:37,085
- Ted?
- Stand down.
221
00:14:37,168 --> 00:14:39,337
- They didn't ask for this.
- You can say that again.
222
00:14:39,420 --> 00:14:41,047
Somebody better get
the disposal running.
223
00:14:41,130 --> 00:14:42,465
There's fishbones in there.
224
00:14:42,548 --> 00:14:45,259
It's called a garbage disposal!
225
00:14:45,343 --> 00:14:48,429
That was your voice on my leg phone.
226
00:14:48,513 --> 00:14:49,680
You're his friend?
227
00:14:49,764 --> 00:14:52,975
Kind of. I'm your grandson.
228
00:14:53,559 --> 00:14:55,895
Well, it looks like we're
gonna be here for a while, huh?
229
00:14:56,771 --> 00:14:58,106
Where's that fucking red button?
230
00:14:59,148 --> 00:15:02,860
Hey, uh, me? Hologram guy?
231
00:15:03,611 --> 00:15:05,321
- Garage?
- Yes?
232
00:15:05,405 --> 00:15:06,864
Y-You can hear me.
233
00:15:06,948 --> 00:15:08,866
Where's this guy keep his tools?
234
00:15:11,452 --> 00:15:12,662
Holy shit.
235
00:15:12,745 --> 00:15:14,163
Hey, Teddy.
236
00:15:14,247 --> 00:15:17,708
As long as you're building
spaceman stuff…
237
00:15:24,715 --> 00:15:25,925
Yeah. Alright!
238
00:15:27,051 --> 00:15:28,136
I'm gonna get another drink.
239
00:15:28,219 --> 00:15:30,763
Come on, Ted.
We were beating you before this too.
240
00:15:30,847 --> 00:15:32,265
- Gimme another pitcher.
- Sure.
241
00:15:32,348 --> 00:15:33,850
Are you one of those hicks
with robot arms?
242
00:15:33,933 --> 00:15:35,184
What'd you call me?
243
00:15:35,268 --> 00:15:36,894
I thought you guys were owning it.
244
00:15:36,978 --> 00:15:38,604
I'll make it interesting, Teddy.
245
00:15:44,235 --> 00:15:47,530
Tough luck!
That's a hard spare to hit.
246
00:15:48,906 --> 00:15:51,784
Guys, I'm gonna
have to ask you to leave.
247
00:15:53,202 --> 00:15:54,620
What are you doing out here?
248
00:15:54,704 --> 00:15:56,664
- Beth made pancakes.
- I'm busy.
249
00:15:56,747 --> 00:15:58,040
You're wearing his clothes now.
250
00:15:58,124 --> 00:15:59,750
It has pockets, it's not a symbol.
251
00:15:59,834 --> 00:16:01,586
Teddy, you know what would be cool?
252
00:16:01,669 --> 00:16:04,338
If I had laser eyes.
253
00:16:04,422 --> 00:16:06,757
Or, okay, one eye is a laser,
254
00:16:06,841 --> 00:16:08,384
and the other sees through clothes.
255
00:16:09,469 --> 00:16:10,887
What the hell is that?!
256
00:16:10,970 --> 00:16:12,138
Just go in.
257
00:16:14,265 --> 00:16:16,976
I can see our bowling alley.
We're going home.
258
00:16:17,059 --> 00:16:19,353
So, we won? We beat this guy?
259
00:16:19,437 --> 00:16:20,938
- Sure.
- Yeah!
260
00:16:21,022 --> 00:16:22,815
- We did it!
- We're goin' home, boys!
261
00:16:24,400 --> 00:16:27,278
And, uh, you'll gimme lasers
when we, uh, get back home?
262
00:16:29,113 --> 00:16:31,949
Hey, want me to keep an eye
on your old stuff?
263
00:16:32,033 --> 00:16:34,702
Sell it if you want.
Buy Luisa something nice.
264
00:16:41,459 --> 00:16:43,044
He looks pretty normal to me.
265
00:16:43,127 --> 00:16:44,879
Talk to him, then.
266
00:16:44,962 --> 00:16:47,298
- Dad?
- Oh, God!
267
00:16:47,381 --> 00:16:49,258
He's still Ted, apparently.
268
00:16:49,342 --> 00:16:50,718
There's a difference?
269
00:16:58,184 --> 00:16:59,352
You see what I'm saying?
270
00:16:59,435 --> 00:17:01,479
I'm not staying if I can't swim.
271
00:18:00,997 --> 00:18:02,665
Well, look who's back.
272
00:18:02,748 --> 00:18:05,042
Came to pour one out for Marjorie.
273
00:18:05,126 --> 00:18:06,168
Marjorie's over there.
274
00:18:06,961 --> 00:18:08,671
This is Little Mike.
275
00:18:08,754 --> 00:18:10,047
Oh, Jesus.
276
00:18:10,131 --> 00:18:12,049
He got run through
on his own robot arm.
277
00:18:12,133 --> 00:18:13,509
- My boy!
- Fuck.
278
00:18:13,593 --> 00:18:14,927
He was drunk.
279
00:18:15,011 --> 00:18:16,470
Guess he had something in his eye.
280
00:18:16,554 --> 00:18:18,598
I didn't mean for any of this
to happen, you guys.
281
00:18:18,681 --> 00:18:21,767
It was just nice
to vacation with dumb people.
282
00:18:21,851 --> 00:18:23,477
You did this,
283
00:18:23,561 --> 00:18:26,188
you fake outsider piece of shit.
284
00:18:41,871 --> 00:18:43,372
- Morty.
- We're in the middle of a game.
285
00:18:43,456 --> 00:18:45,750
Morty, Grandpa needs you.
286
00:18:45,833 --> 00:18:47,793
Grandpa needs you, Morty.
287
00:18:47,877 --> 00:18:50,129
- Come on, it'll just take a minute.
- Uh, okay, Rick.
288
00:18:50,212 --> 00:18:52,923
I mean, Ted. What are we…
What are we calling him now?
289
00:18:53,007 --> 00:18:54,925
Jesus! That's really dangerous!
290
00:18:55,009 --> 00:18:56,802
It's empty, I-I don't know how to…
291
00:18:56,886 --> 00:18:59,430
How do we get more, Morty?
We gotta get more.
292
00:18:59,513 --> 00:19:01,599
Oh, great, the one time
I was winning.
293
00:19:01,682 --> 00:19:02,892
Can you take your grandfather
294
00:19:02,975 --> 00:19:04,518
back out to the garage,
please, Morty?
295
00:19:04,602 --> 00:19:06,520
That is a troubling family dynamic.
296
00:19:06,604 --> 00:19:08,314
Everybody knows that, right?
297
00:19:08,397 --> 00:19:11,233
We can discuss it after we get
this thing off your father.
298
00:19:11,317 --> 00:19:13,110
Know what… Know what, Morty?
299
00:19:13,194 --> 00:19:15,321
I'm not going back there ever.
300
00:19:15,404 --> 00:19:17,073
Stupid bowling.
301
00:19:17,156 --> 00:19:20,451
Bottle-shooting morons. Idiot trophy.
302
00:19:20,534 --> 00:19:22,495
Aw, wait, no, you don't wanna
keep some of these?
303
00:19:22,578 --> 00:19:24,246
You look so happy.
304
00:19:25,206 --> 00:19:28,376
- Don't shred me, Rick!
- It's trash now, Morty! Drop it!
305
00:19:31,337 --> 00:19:33,839
I'm sorry I tried
to shred you, Morty.
306
00:19:33,923 --> 00:19:37,259
Y-Y-You're a nice kid, a good boy.
307
00:19:37,343 --> 00:19:38,761
You should have your grandpa.
308
00:19:38,844 --> 00:19:42,306
Not this…
I'm-I'm too stupid, Morty.
309
00:19:42,390 --> 00:19:44,141
Stupid Ted.
310
00:19:44,225 --> 00:19:46,227
If I were just
a little bit smarter, I could…
311
00:19:46,310 --> 00:19:47,812
I-I could figure it out.
312
00:19:47,895 --> 00:19:49,188
And be happy.
313
00:19:49,271 --> 00:19:50,648
I'm gonna push the button, Morty.
314
00:19:50,731 --> 00:19:52,316
I'm gonna do it for you.
315
00:19:53,359 --> 00:19:55,194
If that makes you feel better?
316
00:19:55,277 --> 00:19:56,737
Is he…
317
00:19:56,821 --> 00:19:58,364
Is he better at this?
318
00:19:58,447 --> 00:20:01,325
Rick? Um, yeah.
319
00:20:01,409 --> 00:20:03,202
Yeah, he is. You are.
320
00:20:03,285 --> 00:20:05,413
Don't-don't bullshit me, Morty.
321
00:20:05,496 --> 00:20:08,791
No, you're really smart,
really important.
322
00:20:08,874 --> 00:20:12,837
You have a great family,
and-and lots of friends.
323
00:20:12,920 --> 00:20:15,089
You're so happy.
324
00:20:15,172 --> 00:20:17,216
And we all really love you.
325
00:20:17,299 --> 00:20:18,467
Aw, fuck it.
326
00:20:27,852 --> 00:20:29,854
It… It didn't work?
327
00:20:30,563 --> 00:20:31,647
No.
328
00:20:32,481 --> 00:20:33,482
It did.
329
00:21:16,525 --> 00:21:19,737
We've always known you
as a tourist on our little island.
330
00:21:19,820 --> 00:21:22,448
But now we're gonna
know you as part of our family.
331
00:21:22,531 --> 00:21:24,825
I love you, Sallpock.
332
00:21:24,909 --> 00:21:26,410
Mush-mush-molock.
333
00:21:26,494 --> 00:21:28,537
I didn't think
I was the kind of man…
334
00:21:30,122 --> 00:21:31,123
Sorry. I, um…
335
00:21:31,207 --> 00:21:33,042
We love you, Sallpock!
336
00:21:34,126 --> 00:21:39,173
Should anyone object, speak now
or forever hold your peace.
337
00:21:39,256 --> 00:21:41,759
- Yeah, I object.
- It's a rhetorical statement!
338
00:21:41,842 --> 00:21:44,094
Shouldn't we let it play out?
He's not in danger.
339
00:21:44,178 --> 00:21:45,971
I've never seen
these people before in my life.
340
00:21:46,055 --> 00:21:49,141
Okay, Grandpa Rick. Let's go.
Vacation's over.
341
00:21:49,225 --> 00:21:51,268
It's not my vacation! It's my home!
342
00:21:52,978 --> 00:21:55,397
No, no! Let me go! No!
343
00:21:55,481 --> 00:21:56,690
Boom. Egged!
344
00:21:56,774 --> 00:21:58,275
It's okay.
345
00:21:58,359 --> 00:21:59,985
He's an alien
who removes his intelligence
346
00:22:00,069 --> 00:22:01,320
to hook up with locals.
347
00:22:01,403 --> 00:22:02,696
He likes that you're simple.
348
00:22:02,780 --> 00:22:04,198
He doesn't want to be known.
25273
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