Original subtitles

Take the pills and I'll come inside you.

Okay, Rosemary.

I finished my book on Adderall. Here you go.

Fuck it. I wanna throw a party.

It's only weird if you make it weird.

Rosemary, I'm late for therapy.

Oh, we canceled because we're doing great.

If this is a demon,

you need to take care of this now.

ButI thought it was important

that we know the competition. What about that Blake fellow?

I wouldn't mind taking him home.

What did you do?

I just want us to be a normal family.

Terry, we're Phelps. We can do anything.

Aren't you an NPC?

I'm Daisy. I used to live here.

My mom always wore her necklace,

but she wasn't wearing it when she died.

I'm not afraid of you.

Okay.

Don't look down. Don't look down.

Oh, come on, man.

Oh, God. Oh, God.

Uh--

Shit!

Ah!

- Shh!

Roxy! Mommy's doing something!

- Shh! Roxy!

Mom, did you just kill Roxy?

Honey, we have to keep this a secret.

You remember how to keep a secret, right?

Dad!

Mom killed Roxy and is burying her in the backyard--

Oh, Jake!

Are you fucking kidding me?

Gaynor... it's not what you think.

Really?

Because I think you finally fucking snapped,

you crazy bit--

Hey, thought I heard you down here.

Is that my shovel?

Those our kids?

Fuck it!

Oh, my gosh.

Roxy! You're alive!

You do not fuck with someone's dog!

Wow, you really are just a hairy spine.

There you are. Whoa!

I don't think I've ever seen Roxy wet before.

Terry, I had the worst dream last night.

Yeah?

I dreamt that you and Roxy and the kids

were all buried in the backyard.

And then when I woke up, Roxy was covered in dirt.

I thought you were dead.

No, Roxy just got in the plants and--wait.

You thought the kids and I were dead,

but you stopped to wash Roxy?

She was really dirty.

I'd like to talk to you about last night.

No, thanks. I'm good.

I'm not. Something happened,

and I wanna tell you about it. I-I wrote it down, actually.

I just wanna choose my words very, very carefully.

- Um...

Uh, just "Pat... I--"

"I am sad to report, last night,

I violated our marriage covenant."

- What the hell? - I know.

Just please let me get through this, honey, okay?

"Though much of the past year has fluctuated from bad

to really, really terrible, I remain faithful and true."

- Oh, no. God. - Yes, it gets worse.

"Last night, fueled by many cocktails..."

Oh.

"...and a general lack of your sensitivity"--

we've talked about-- "I shared a kiss

with my coworker Kathryn Dunn."

- Holy fuck! - I know.

Listen, after everything that happened

last night, it was crazy.

You know, I wanna earn the trust back, okay?

I wanna fight for this. Tell me what to do.

- Pat! - What?

We're good. I trust you.

You're an amazing woman.

No, no. I'm really not.

- I have to go. - Wow.

Hey, Mom. You got a second?

No, I really don't.

Jesus, I asked you for one second.

And I told you, I don't have time.

Then don't act like you fucking care.

And those are my sneakers. You crazy bitch.

I don't think you know who you're talking to.

Hey, Mom, can I take this sword to school?

What? No.

We're already on the list because you brought in porn.

Oh, Jake--

Where are my fucking keys?

That's not a sword. That is an epee.

I actually used it in college when I fenced at Penn.

I need it in case Dan comes back.

Dan? You got a bully?

I'll teach you the passata-sotto.

This is Dan.

Gimme that.

Why can't you be normal?

Whoa, whoa. Pat, take it easy.

What?

I'm so sorry, sweetie. I'm so sorry.

For what?

I've gotta go. I've really gotta go.

Okay, is it just me,

or is Mom more batshit than usual?

Zeth, I got possessed.

Wow. Okay. Who am I talking to?

Pat Phelps.

How many fucking possessed women

do you get in here?

Slow it down.

We're gonna talk in calm, soothing tones.

What happened since I last saw you?

I invited the demon into my body.

She threw a party, did some blow,

and fucked the shit out of one of my guests...

and made some kind of turkey jelly thing.

Okay.

Has she tried to physically hurt you or any family members?

She did have me out on a ledge.

Oh, and the neighbor killed herself on the--on our fence.

And I found her necklace in my drawer.

Yep.

Demons tend to collect souvenirs from their victims.

- Thought it was serial killers. - Ha, ha, ha, ha.

That is actually what my novel is about.

Poltergeist serial killer.

In fact, and I hate to ask, but would you mind writing

a short little blurb for the jacket?

I'm not writing a blurb for your fucking book.

- I'm possessed! - Mm?

Okay, get rid of the demon, and I'll give you a quote.

Excellent.

Okay, so, there's exorcism, but you're gonna have to go

through the Vatican, and it takes about a year.

I'll be a spider-walking down the stairs by then.

- What else? - Um, demons need a host.

Could destroy the vessel.

Me being the vessel?

Correct.

So I have to kill myself?

That, or you commit to leading a clean, anxiety-,

anger-, stress-, and drug-free life--

So I have to kill myself.

I know she wants to finish the book.

- What if I let her do that? - No, no, no, no.

When you make a bargain with a demon,

if you hold up your end of that bargain,

they own you forever.

So you're saying that I'm fucked!

There is...one thing we could try.

Evil, stay away from me.

- The enemy will surely flee.

I gain protection and defense.

Remove your wicked countenance!

- Get out! - What happened?

Did I do that?

Just get the fuck out!

It could have been so much worse.

You didn't die. Yet.

Just go!

Okay, Demon. Your story's over.

Damn it.

What are you doing, Patricia?

We had a deal, and it is not nice to break a promise.

Well, you broke my marriage

and possibly my jaw,

so I--I think we're even.

Hi, Kam.

Hey, Trish. Is now a bad time?

It couldn't be worse.

Okay, well, I have some really good news

and some really bad news.

What now?

We want your book for the summer.

It's gonna be our big release.

Oh, okay. What's the good news?

That is the good news.

What happened to Claire's book?

You know, it's so weird.

The day after your party, she slipped into a coma.

- Oh, shit. - I know.

But you know, we have to be practical about these things.

It's what Claire would've wanted. Maybe.

Kam, I'm sorry. I can't--I can't do it.

Don't pull a Pat on me. My ass is on the line.

Wait, are you wearing my shrug?

God, I've been looking for that.

Fuck!

Oh, you're so jumpy, Patricia.

That's because someone hasn't taken her medication.

I'm not taking the drugs.

So please get the fuck out of my house and out of my body.

And don't let the door hit my ass on the way out.

Don't do this, Patricia.

Or what?

You can't kill me. You need me.

So what are you gonna do?

- You've got mail. - Ooh.

Oh.

Terry, I swear it wasn't me!

Really? It sure looks like you,

except Blake's dick's in your mouth.

- I can explain that. - Please do.

You can start by telling me how you managed to open

your jaw like a cobra when you told me you had TMJ.

I paid for adult braces.

I do have TMJ. My jaw clicks. Listen!

No, I can't hear a thing.

You know what? It doesn't matter.

Terry, listen.

I didn't wanna tell you this, but there's a demon.

Yeah, I know. I'm looking right at her.

Terry, please.

Pat, it's over. You destroyed everything.

Hey, can I talk to you a sec?

Why? Do you wanna break up with me again?

'Cause I got it when you ghosted me, and then told me.

I don't know, maybe you post it?

Look, I'm a dick. I'm sorry.

It runs in my family. What can I say? It's genetic.

You don't even know who you are, but I see you.

You're kind and strong, and you have so much love to give,

but you give none of it to yourself.

Oh, my God. That's not who I am at all.

But that's really nice of you to say.

Yeah, well, I hope your next boyfriend

gets you more than I do.

Wait, what? You're breaking up with me?

No, I'm moving.

The real estate lady had, like, three offers on the house

by the time I got back from the funeral.

- Where are you going? - I don't know.

I got a pretty cool uncle in LA.

Might crash with him for a while.

Ugh, that's so awesome.

Come with me.

What? No, I can't.

Why not?

I don't know. What would we do for money?

I'm pretty sure my parents would stop

paying my credit card bill after they found out

I went to live with you and your "pretty cool uncle in LA."

I'm getting, like, a million dollars from the house,

plus, like, another half a million from the trust fund.

We could do whatever we want.

Oh, my God.

I'm in.

Really?

Yeah, let's get the fuck outta Shining Vale.

- I'm so happy. - I might be pregnant.

She had the affair with Frank

because she was depressed, but now she's happy.

I mean, she's writing her book again.

She's--she had a party.

It's like she's two different people.

I suspected something was wrong

when she canceled our last session.

She told me you canceled.

It was Pat. I have the voice mail.

Okay, well, I'm gonna ask you something,

and I need you to answer me honestly.

Do I have to pay for that?

We have a 72-hour cancellation policy.

Fuck. This day keeps getting worse.

This is Patricia Phelps.

When a woman tells you she is feeling depressed,

listen to her.

Don't just prescribe her more medicine,

you misogynistic little prick.

We will not be coming in today or ever.

I'm going to kill us all.

Oh, also we need more Clonazepam.

That's Pat? That's terrifying.

That... doesn't even sound like her.

That's why I called for a three-day psychiatric hold.

What does that mean?

It means she needs to be put

into involuntary care immediately.

Why is this the first I'm hearing about this?

- Are you sure? - Absolutely.

She's a danger to you and your family.

I'll let you know exactly when I called it in.

Oh, my God...

Uh...

My apologies, Terry. It seems I forgot.

You forgot to call in a three-day psychiatric hold

on my wife?

It--it's been a very stressful year for me--

Holy shit!

You are the worst therapist ever.

Hey, I'm not paying for that last motherfucking session!

What the fuck, Dad?

You're driving worse than usual.

Gaynor, I don't have time for this, okay?

Listen, here's the deal. Everything's fine.

Okay? We're just gonna be spending a few days

at my parents' house. All right?

Wait, Doctor and Dr. Phelps are gonna let us stay over?

Uh, hope so.

We'll--we'll call them on the way. Stay here.

I'm not going anywhere without Roxy.

You made that exceedingly clear on the drive over.

Everything's fine.

I'm just gonna run over to the house,

I'm gonna get Roxy, I'll bring her back.

Everything will be fine. It's fine.

"Everything's fine"?

Why do you keep saying it's gonna be fine?

'Cause it is!

Lock the car, don't open the doors or windows

under any circumstances.

Everything's fine!

Why did you pick me?

I mean, why not Gaynor?

Not that I'm suggesting that.

It's just, I'm way past my possession years.

'Cause I come alive in your writing.

Come on,

that chapter with Blake?

That was a real page-turner.

Then why not Claire? She's half my age.

You could have gone inside of her

instead of putting her in a coma.

Sweetheart, no one writes me like you do.

What is so fucking important about this book?

By the way, I've read it. It's not great.

That's because you don't know how we finish.

Come, let me show you how it ends.

Roxy?

Roxy?

Roxy!

Terry.

Pat?

Mom.

You know I'm allergic to eggs, Mom.

You're not allergic to eggs, you just don't like them--

Coffee!

Elijah, you spilled the milk again.

Roxy!

No, that is you. That's not me.

But we are the same person, Patricia.

Two strong women driven to the brink by our families.

There's one tiny difference.

I'm not a psychopath.

Haven't you ever thought of killing your family?

I'm a mother. Of course I have.

Well, then just take these pills,

and we can finish the job together.

Oh, my God.

Rosemary.

I know there's a mother inside of you

that was angry, who was sad,

that lost her shit.

I get that. I can relate, I promise you.

And I am so sorry for you,

but I will not kill my family.

I've been trapped inside this goddamn place

for as long as I can remember.

I need to move on.

You are the only one who's strong enough

to take over.

You made the deal. You have no choice.

Fuck you.

I don't think you understand

who you are dealing with.

I don't think you understand who you're dealing with.

What are you doing? That's too much.

I'm destroying the vessel.

Oh, Patricia, that's revolting.

Fucking Joan.

I'm surprisingly bad at taking pills.

You could've gone out in style,

but instead you're overdosing like your mother.

You asked me to slaughter my family.

That's a pretty big fucking ask.

Okay, well, then, new deal, because no one likes

to kill their children or their pets.

But husbands, they're the ones who hold us back the most.

We still have a window. Come on, let's use it.

I'm not gonna kill Terry.

Nobody has been more supportive than that poor guy.

Oh, come on.

That poor guy has been holding you back your entire career.

Terry didn't give me writer's block.

Didn't he?

Your pen dried up as soon as you got married,

along with some other things.

Because I had kids.

Mm-hmm. Which he wanted.

Think about it, Patricia.

As soon as he thought you were successful,

he tried to fuck his secretary.

She's not his secretary.

He kissed her and then told me about it.

Let's face it.

The only time you two got along in this cursed house

was when I was cooking and cleaning for him.

In fact, right now,

he's trying to sabotage your new book.

Shut up.

He's on the phone with Kam.

Go on, pick up the extension.

It doesn't work that way, dumbass.

Patricia.

Patricia...

Patricia.

We have a lot of work to do, Patricia.

Hey.

Kam, have you read Pat's book?

Everything but the ending.

Well, I just read the ending.

Ooh, is it good?

"She chops up her family with an axe."

Can you send it to me?

Listen, you don't understand.

I mean, she is out of her fucking mind--

Here's Patty.

I'll call you back.

What the fuck is taking so long?

Can I tell you something personal?

It's not pervy, is it?

No. Can you just roll up the window?

I don't want other people to hear it.

What's going on, bud?

- Oh, my gosh!

Ew! So fucking gross.

You don't hotbox your sister!

- Sorry. I'm bored.

She's back.

Run!

Where are you going? Dad said not to leave.

Daisy said to run.

I'm not getting in trouble for you!

Roxy!

So... what did you think of the book?

To be totally honest, I didn't love it.

Hmm.

Hey, we're gonna put that axe down right now, okay?

And we're gonna sit down and we're just gonna talk

about this, okay?

Okay.

Holy fuck!

Pat, that's a load-bearing beam!

Crazy...

Roxy! Where are you?

- Roxy!

Hey sweetie.

What are you doing?

You're gonna get dirty, and no one likes cleaning you.

What the fuck?

God...

Mom? Mom!

What is it, sweetie?

Mom?

Remember that girl from the video game?

She said her name is Daisy.

She used to live here, but her mom killed her.

Her mom came back, but Daisy says

there is one way we can stop her.

- Mom?

Roxy!

Hey, sweetie, you're on your own.

Where are you going, Terry?

Pat, put down the axe, okay?

I don't want somebody to get hurt.

I'm not gonna hurt you.

I'm just gonna chop your legs off.

Right, well, I think that would hurt.

- Go. - Hey.

I spoke to Dr. Berg, okay? And not that it matters,

but he's not gonna charge us for that missed session.

I think maybe you should be taken to a hospital.

- So when do you think maybe - Dammit.

I should go to the hospital?

- As soon as possible. - "As soon as possible"?

Hey, I know you're high, Pat. I found the drugs, okay?

Just gonna--we're gonna get you help. Okay?

I forgive you for everything. For Blake, everything.

- You forgive me? - God damn it!

Has it ever occurred to you

what it feels like to always be forgiven?

I'm guessing by the crazed look in your eyes, not great.

No, it's not fucking great, Terry.

You set an impossible standard

for what it means to be a spouse.

I cheated on you, and you bought me

a fucking mansion in Connecticut.

Because I wanted you to be happy!

I can't be happy!

You can, Pat. We can.

We were happy before. We can be happy again.

Stop being so patient. It's exhausting!

I fucked a random guy

in a car that I bought with your credit card.

Do something!

That's a direct hit. In fencing, that'd be my point.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

Terry, Terry, I'm so sorry. That wasn't me.

Terry, please wake up.

Are you fucking kidding me?

Why is my godmother's necklace buried in the backyard?

And why is Dad dead?

He--he's alive. Gaynor--

Hey, don't you fucking touch me.

I don't have much time.

I know I haven't been the best mother--

You've literally been the worst mother.

Fuck it!

Mom!

Why do I have to go to a new school?

It's not fair.

'Cause this is a school for smart people,

- and you are smart. - Am I smart?

What? You are amazing!

What if I can't handle it?

Wait a second, Gaynor.

What was that word I heard? Huh?

"What if I--coconut?" Is that what I heard? Hmm?

Jake, what did you hear?

"What if I Corn Nut?" I don't know that word.

We don't know that--do we know that word, "can't?"

No, we can do anything, guys. You know why?

I'll tell you why. We--

Are Phelps. We are Phelps.

We are Phelps. We are Phelps.

To the beat, Dad.

We are Phelps! We are Phelps! We are Phelps!

We are Phelps! We are...

Mrs. Phelps. Mrs. Phelps.

Mrs. Phelps? Mrs. Phelps?

What's--where am I?

You're in the Shining Vale psychiatric hospital.

No, I'm not crazy. There--there's a mistake.

You overdosed on expired barbiturates.

What? Wait! Those are my mother's.

There was a ghost. There's a demon!

Gaynor! Gaynor!

- Tell them I'm not crazy. - It's okay, Mom.

They're just gonna take care of you for a little while.

Don't do this to me. Don't do this to me.

I'm possessed!

I'm not crazy!

Are we gonna be okay?

This can't happen to me.

Yeah. We are Phelps.

Gaynor, I'm not fucking crazy!

Gaynor!

Gaynor.

It's okay. It's okay.

Don't you touch me!

Don't you touch me!

That's my house.

Hello? That's my house.

Welcome home.