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Subtitles by explosiveskull
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This is Eddie Krumble.
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00:00:37,077 --> 00:00:38,312
Leave a message at the beep.
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00:00:39,779 --> 00:00:41,547
Eddie, it's your mother.
5
00:00:41,549 --> 00:00:44,282
I'm leaving this message
on your machine.
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00:00:44,284 --> 00:00:47,688
We saw you on the television
here on your real estate show.
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00:00:48,320 --> 00:00:51,591
You looked very handsome.
Call your mother.
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00:00:53,591 --> 00:00:56,292
So you're trying to tell me,
with no money down,
9
00:00:56,294 --> 00:00:58,160
I can get a house?
10
00:00:58,162 --> 00:00:59,294
This is Eddie Krumble.
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00:00:59,296 --> 00:01:02,431
- Leave a message at the beep.
- I can get a house.
12
00:01:02,433 --> 00:01:04,431
Eddie,
it's the machine again.
13
00:01:04,433 --> 00:01:05,268
House.
14
00:01:06,302 --> 00:01:07,401
You're trying to tell me,
with no money down,
15
00:01:07,403 --> 00:01:08,436
- I can get a house?
- We're freezing here.
16
00:01:08,438 --> 00:01:10,604
You're trying to tell me,
with no money down,
17
00:01:10,606 --> 00:01:12,840
- I can get a house?
- We live in an icebox.
18
00:01:12,842 --> 00:01:14,575
I can get a house?
19
00:01:14,577 --> 00:01:16,810
A house? House?
20
00:01:16,812 --> 00:01:18,514
Eddie, tell 'em...
21
00:01:30,524 --> 00:01:35,429
♪ Now and again,
I'm getting sore ♪
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00:01:37,630 --> 00:01:42,300
♪ We saw them getting more ♪
23
00:01:44,269 --> 00:01:49,207
♪ Now and again, I get bored ♪
24
00:01:51,242 --> 00:01:55,646
♪ We saw them shake the shore ♪
25
00:01:58,147 --> 00:02:02,584
♪ We saw them shake the shore ♪
26
00:02:18,664 --> 00:02:24,269
♪ Let's go outdoors ♪
27
00:02:24,737 --> 00:02:29,507
♪ It's a hearty haze
With strange decor ♪
28
00:02:32,277 --> 00:02:37,714
♪ Let's go outdoors ♪
29
00:02:38,415 --> 00:02:43,653
♪ It's a funny phase
To making more ♪
30
00:02:45,388 --> 00:02:50,592
♪ It's a funny phase
To making more ♪
31
00:02:59,799 --> 00:03:04,537
♪ Now and again, I keep score ♪
32
00:03:06,673 --> 00:03:11,177
♪ We saw them taking more ♪
33
00:03:13,278 --> 00:03:18,183
♪ Now and again, I get bored ♪
34
00:03:20,484 --> 00:03:24,654
♪ We saw them shake the shore ♪
35
00:03:26,990 --> 00:03:31,628
♪ We saw them shake the shore ♪
36
00:03:33,829 --> 00:03:38,567
♪ Let's go outdoors ♪
37
00:03:41,235 --> 00:03:46,306
♪ Let's go outdoors ♪
38
00:03:46,806 --> 00:03:51,712
♪ It's a hearty haze
With strange decor ♪
39
00:03:53,713 --> 00:03:59,484
♪ It's a hearty haze
With strange decor ♪
40
00:04:01,653 --> 00:04:05,722
♪ Let's go outdoors ♪
41
00:04:05,724 --> 00:04:08,557
Next stop,
Hollywood and Highland.
42
00:04:08,559 --> 00:04:10,295
Enjoy your day.
43
00:04:14,696 --> 00:04:18,331
Hollywood bus tour!
$13 all day. Hop in, hop off.
44
00:04:18,333 --> 00:04:21,433
Hollywood bus tour.
Hey, Hollywood bus tour.
45
00:04:21,435 --> 00:04:23,536
Hollywood bus tour!
Hollywood bus tour!
46
00:04:23,538 --> 00:04:25,971
Hollywood bus tour.
Hop on, hop off, $13 all.
47
00:04:25,973 --> 00:04:27,538
- Hey!
- Harry!
48
00:04:27,540 --> 00:04:30,475
Hey, Chris, Eddie.
Another day in hell, huh?
49
00:04:30,477 --> 00:04:32,478
Living the dream,
living the dream.
50
00:04:32,480 --> 00:04:34,344
Hey, you doing
your shows today?
51
00:04:34,346 --> 00:04:37,015
Yeah, I got two questions.
Extra hundred bucks.
52
00:04:37,017 --> 00:04:39,517
Outta sight! Hey, you gotta
hook me up with that.
53
00:04:39,519 --> 00:04:42,019
I'll try, you know?
Making a living, right?
54
00:04:42,021 --> 00:04:43,954
Making a living, yeah.
Hollywood bus tour!
55
00:04:43,956 --> 00:04:46,523
Hop on, hop off.
$13 all day.
56
00:04:46,525 --> 00:04:48,556
Hollywood bus tour.
Hollywood bus tour, sir?
57
00:04:48,558 --> 00:04:51,494
Hop on, hop off, all day.
See Hollywood.
58
00:04:51,496 --> 00:04:53,763
- You good?
- I'm good.
59
00:04:53,765 --> 00:04:55,329
Filled up? All right.
60
00:04:55,331 --> 00:04:58,500
No money down!
No money down!
61
00:04:58,502 --> 00:05:02,569
No money down!
No money down!
62
00:05:02,571 --> 00:05:04,504
Yes, yes!
That's absolutely right!
63
00:05:04,506 --> 00:05:06,342
And remember,
what you're talking about here
64
00:05:06,508 --> 00:05:10,510
is almost an acre of property
for pennies on the dollar!
65
00:05:10,512 --> 00:05:14,613
Pennies on the dollar!
Pennies on the dollar!
66
00:05:14,615 --> 00:05:17,819
And at Tranquil Estates,
we have seven lakes
67
00:05:18,018 --> 00:05:20,084
just teeming with catfish,
68
00:05:20,086 --> 00:05:22,389
thirteen playgrounds
and three golf courses.
69
00:05:22,655 --> 00:05:24,991
Yes, go tweet about that
right now, sir.
70
00:05:27,693 --> 00:05:30,061
Uh-huh, yes, sir.
71
00:05:30,063 --> 00:05:32,961
So you mean to tell me,
with no money down,
72
00:05:32,963 --> 00:05:34,396
I can buy a house?
73
00:05:34,398 --> 00:05:36,865
You're a fine listener, sir.
Exactly!
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00:05:36,867 --> 00:05:40,001
Yes, my friends, we want you
to enjoy the neighbors,
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00:05:40,003 --> 00:05:41,569
the Clooneys,
the Kardashians,
76
00:05:41,571 --> 00:05:44,407
and that's if we still
have a lot for them.
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00:05:50,747 --> 00:05:52,713
One resident
was candidly quoted as saying,
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00:05:52,715 --> 00:05:55,982
the earth simply opened up,
and down the drain they went.
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00:05:55,984 --> 00:05:57,487
Oh!
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00:05:58,086 --> 00:05:59,051
Yeah, right?
81
00:05:59,053 --> 00:06:00,953
One day you're doing stuff,
the next day...
82
00:06:00,955 --> 00:06:02,688
You put yourself out there,
83
00:06:02,690 --> 00:06:04,590
something's bound to happen
sooner or later.
84
00:06:04,592 --> 00:06:06,694
Keep it simple.
That's what I'm saying.
85
00:06:07,494 --> 00:06:09,694
Pay me to clap,
maybe I get a question,
86
00:06:09,696 --> 00:06:11,695
make a few extra bucks,
I'm good.
87
00:06:11,697 --> 00:06:12,996
Oh, my God, no way.
88
00:06:12,998 --> 00:06:15,366
Alan Thicke, Alan Thicke!
That's crazy.
89
00:06:15,368 --> 00:06:16,667
Me and Chris, we were
just talking about you.
90
00:06:16,669 --> 00:06:18,535
We were in the audience.
I asked the question.
91
00:06:18,537 --> 00:06:20,103
No money down,
not one penny.
92
00:06:20,105 --> 00:06:22,971
Hey, you remembered that.
Good. Oh, great.
93
00:06:22,973 --> 00:06:25,440
By the way,
you said that perfectly.
94
00:06:25,442 --> 00:06:27,843
You nailed that line,
and you looked good.
95
00:06:27,845 --> 00:06:30,946
You guys were very good.
Best audience money can buy.
96
00:06:30,948 --> 00:06:32,680
That place is nice, right?
97
00:06:32,682 --> 00:06:34,748
Yeah, you're gonna...
you're gonna love it there.
98
00:06:34,750 --> 00:06:35,851
Sign up.
99
00:06:36,986 --> 00:06:41,019
So if I wanted to get a place
for, like, like just...
100
00:06:41,021 --> 00:06:43,456
No money down.
Not one penny.
101
00:06:43,458 --> 00:06:46,526
No money down! Yeah! Sorry.
Just from the show, right?
102
00:06:46,528 --> 00:06:48,426
- Yeah, you were listening.
- That's great.
103
00:06:48,428 --> 00:06:50,729
He's a candidate, that guy.
104
00:06:50,731 --> 00:06:54,433
Listen, you know, I just come
by here to grab a bite to eat,
105
00:06:54,435 --> 00:06:57,034
take it home with me,
long day at the office.
106
00:06:57,036 --> 00:06:58,603
I don't mean to bother you
or nothing.
107
00:06:58,605 --> 00:07:02,506
I'm asking Alan Thicke.
Is it really down there?
108
00:07:02,508 --> 00:07:05,008
Tell you what, the food's
taking a little while, okay?
109
00:07:05,010 --> 00:07:06,746
But here's what's gonna happen.
110
00:07:07,746 --> 00:07:11,350
If you guys don't shut up,
I'm gonna kill ya.
111
00:07:11,615 --> 00:07:14,885
And I'll hurt your friend.
Have a nice day.
112
00:07:15,985 --> 00:07:18,752
- How much gas do you need?
- Well, you never know.
113
00:07:18,754 --> 00:07:20,521
You just got
a quarter tank.
114
00:07:20,523 --> 00:07:22,590
I think you just like
going to this gas station.
115
00:07:22,592 --> 00:07:23,760
I'll be right back.
116
00:07:28,096 --> 00:07:29,599
- Hi, Judy.
- Hi, Eddie.
117
00:07:29,864 --> 00:07:34,469
Hey, so, um,
I'll do four dollars and...
118
00:07:36,004 --> 00:07:38,970
- Four-fifty.
- Pump three.
119
00:07:38,972 --> 00:07:40,741
I saw Chris earlier.
120
00:07:42,208 --> 00:07:43,907
Um, sorry, the speaker's broke.
121
00:07:43,909 --> 00:07:45,575
I saw Chris earlier.
122
00:07:45,577 --> 00:07:47,043
Oh, Chris?
Yeah, he's in the car.
123
00:07:47,045 --> 00:07:48,415
Gas can.
124
00:07:48,648 --> 00:07:50,751
Oh, he had a dog with him?
125
00:07:52,583 --> 00:07:54,617
What?
126
00:07:54,619 --> 00:07:56,020
A dog?
127
00:07:56,455 --> 00:07:58,523
I can't hear you.
128
00:08:00,490 --> 00:08:02,659
- Um, sorry.
- I can't... What?
129
00:08:02,993 --> 00:08:04,396
The speaker's broken.
130
00:08:05,127 --> 00:08:08,963
The... Can you hear me?
131
00:08:08,965 --> 00:08:10,501
Oh, yeah.
132
00:08:11,100 --> 00:08:14,034
Yeah, if you go over there
by the pump,
133
00:08:14,036 --> 00:08:15,501
you can hear me better.
134
00:08:15,503 --> 00:08:18,104
- Back here?
- Can you hear me now?
135
00:08:18,106 --> 00:08:20,639
- Okay.
- But I can hear you.
136
00:08:20,641 --> 00:08:22,641
- Right here.
- It's broken every other day.
137
00:08:22,643 --> 00:08:24,243
Yeah, you're right there.
138
00:08:24,245 --> 00:08:25,877
You said Chris has a dog?
139
00:08:25,879 --> 00:08:28,947
He walks his friend
Walter's dog, yeah.
140
00:08:28,949 --> 00:08:30,681
He's an optometrist.
141
00:08:30,683 --> 00:08:32,817
At least he says he is,
but I don't know.
142
00:08:32,819 --> 00:08:33,953
Chris's dog?
143
00:08:34,152 --> 00:08:37,556
No, the dog's not
an optometrist, Judy.
144
00:08:39,023 --> 00:08:40,691
Unbelievable.
145
00:08:41,492 --> 00:08:43,429
You know what would be
a good idea?
146
00:08:43,795 --> 00:08:45,927
I mean, just off
the top of my head,
147
00:08:45,929 --> 00:08:49,931
maybe put out some flash cards
for the customers
148
00:08:49,933 --> 00:08:52,868
so they can hold up the cards
that say what they want,
149
00:08:52,870 --> 00:08:56,936
like "cigarettes"
or "I want more gas" or...
150
00:08:56,938 --> 00:08:58,906
- Lottery tickets?
- Yeah, lottery tickets!
151
00:08:58,908 --> 00:09:02,208
You know, different cards for
when the speaker goes out.
152
00:09:02,210 --> 00:09:05,046
Yeah, that would be
really helpful.
153
00:09:05,513 --> 00:09:07,549
You always have
such good ideas.
154
00:09:08,048 --> 00:09:09,549
Yeah, thanks.
155
00:09:15,089 --> 00:09:17,587
Oh, my God,
you're killing me!
156
00:09:17,589 --> 00:09:19,625
I'm gonna get the gas, Judy.
157
00:09:20,260 --> 00:09:22,662
- All right.
- Bye.
158
00:09:25,029 --> 00:09:26,263
Bye, Eddie.
159
00:09:26,265 --> 00:09:27,897
Pull the trigger,
dispense the nail,
160
00:09:27,899 --> 00:09:30,098
and whack it in with one hand.
Or switch hands.
161
00:09:30,100 --> 00:09:32,202
It'll feel like someone else
is whacking it for you.
162
00:09:34,238 --> 00:09:38,039
So what you're telling me is,
"Goodbye, conventional hammer?"
163
00:09:38,041 --> 00:09:39,774
You hit the nail
on the head, sir.
164
00:09:39,776 --> 00:09:41,742
Goodbye, conventional hammer.
Goodbye, conventional nails.
165
00:09:41,744 --> 00:09:43,011
Goodbye, conventional life.
166
00:09:43,013 --> 00:09:45,714
And hello, Nailhammer!
167
00:09:48,684 --> 00:09:49,950
Much better
on the question, Eddie,
168
00:09:49,952 --> 00:09:52,118
but, Chris, you have
to be laughing harder
169
00:09:52,120 --> 00:09:53,753
when that sign comes on.
170
00:09:53,755 --> 00:09:55,988
Your little chuckles
aren't gonna cut it anymore.
171
00:09:55,990 --> 00:09:57,722
- No more chuckles.
- Right.
172
00:09:57,724 --> 00:09:59,958
And, Alma, enough with
the sandwiches already, okay?
173
00:09:59,960 --> 00:10:02,163
We're trying to do a show.
Stop with the eat...
174
00:10:03,163 --> 00:10:06,130
I had two questions today.
That's like an extra 100 bucks.
175
00:10:06,132 --> 00:10:10,034
Uh, sorry, word from above is
no more bonuses for speaking.
176
00:10:10,036 --> 00:10:12,935
- Yugoslavia!
- Yes, ma'am.
177
00:10:12,937 --> 00:10:15,605
Normal people
don't wear red, okay?
178
00:10:15,607 --> 00:10:18,174
That guy, he got a nail
in his hand, right?
179
00:10:18,176 --> 00:10:19,942
Thank you.
Thank you for the info.
180
00:10:19,944 --> 00:10:21,842
This stuff is
for SAG members only,
181
00:10:21,844 --> 00:10:23,912
so unless you have a SAG card,
I need you to keep it moving.
182
00:10:23,914 --> 00:10:26,580
Excuse me! We're part
of the show, all right?
183
00:10:26,582 --> 00:10:29,015
So we got every much a right
to that as anybody.
184
00:10:29,017 --> 00:10:30,686
Chris, get whatever you want.
185
00:10:32,255 --> 00:10:36,355
Okay, just... That's enough.
Use a plate.
186
00:10:36,357 --> 00:10:37,859
There's napkins.
187
00:10:38,927 --> 00:10:40,159
That's unsanitary.
188
00:10:40,161 --> 00:10:42,727
What's going on with
the sandwich police back there?
189
00:10:42,729 --> 00:10:43,929
That was unbelievable.
190
00:10:43,931 --> 00:10:46,064
These people walk all over you,
you know what I'm saying?
191
00:10:46,066 --> 00:10:48,198
You know why?
'Cause we don't have a union.
192
00:10:48,200 --> 00:10:50,034
That's what we need, a union.
193
00:10:50,036 --> 00:10:51,869
- Yep, totally.
- That's what I'm saying.
194
00:10:51,871 --> 00:10:53,937
You know what Rudy was telling
me, from market research?
195
00:10:53,939 --> 00:10:54,741
Oh, not Rudy.
196
00:10:55,742 --> 00:10:56,606
Yeah, he said that all
those shows in the '70s,
197
00:10:56,608 --> 00:10:59,176
all those clappers
are all dead now.
198
00:10:59,178 --> 00:11:00,143
I heard the same thing.
199
00:11:00,145 --> 00:11:01,344
So how do they use the new ones?
200
00:11:01,346 --> 00:11:02,644
They're all dead people.
201
00:11:02,646 --> 00:11:04,080
- Using who?
- The new ones?
202
00:11:04,082 --> 00:11:05,781
Yeah, they're like
dead people laughing.
203
00:11:05,783 --> 00:11:07,715
- How is that even possible?
- That's crazy.
204
00:11:07,717 --> 00:11:09,383
Wait, what?
Who's even telling the story?
205
00:11:09,385 --> 00:11:12,186
- Who?
- Me. I'm telling the story.
206
00:11:12,188 --> 00:11:14,055
Okay, if I wasn't
such an idiot,
207
00:11:14,057 --> 00:11:16,689
I would feel like a moron,
hanging out with you people.
208
00:11:16,691 --> 00:11:18,358
Oh, yeah. That's why I gotta
find a backup
209
00:11:18,360 --> 00:11:19,959
before we're all dead
and clapping.
210
00:11:19,961 --> 00:11:22,163
No, I don't want
to be laughing and dead.
211
00:11:22,664 --> 00:11:24,230
I don't even want to be
a part of that group.
212
00:11:24,232 --> 00:11:25,800
That's not a thing.
You can't.
213
00:11:26,100 --> 00:11:28,799
We ain't gonna make no money
laughing or dead.
214
00:11:28,801 --> 00:11:31,572
From
Hollywood, California,
215
00:11:31,804 --> 00:11:34,706
it's the Jayme Stillerman Show.
216
00:11:34,708 --> 00:11:37,577
Eddie, it's your mother.
217
00:11:37,710 --> 00:11:40,344
We saw you on the TV
talking about your juice thing.
218
00:11:40,346 --> 00:11:42,978
I'll tell you what
I really think.
219
00:11:42,980 --> 00:11:46,416
I think maybe you looked
not so good on it
220
00:11:46,418 --> 00:11:48,788
because the lights...
221
00:11:48,986 --> 00:11:52,087
Ma, hi, it's me.
222
00:11:52,089 --> 00:11:53,858
We saw your show!
223
00:11:54,258 --> 00:11:57,725
I keep telling ya, Ma,
these ain't my shows, okay?
224
00:11:57,727 --> 00:11:59,827
- What?
- It's two in the morning there.
225
00:11:59,829 --> 00:12:01,598
Why are you calling me
right now?
226
00:12:01,864 --> 00:12:03,797
How on Earth
do some of these ideas
227
00:12:03,799 --> 00:12:05,398
ever make it on television?
228
00:12:05,400 --> 00:12:07,366
At least I wonder that.
Take a look at this.
229
00:12:07,368 --> 00:12:09,001
Okay, Gladys told you this?
230
00:12:09,003 --> 00:12:12,139
How did Gladys tell you this?
She can't speak English.
231
00:12:13,241 --> 00:12:15,440
It's a spoon, a fork and
collapsible plate all in one,
232
00:12:15,442 --> 00:12:17,209
and you don't have to wait
for anything ever?
233
00:12:17,211 --> 00:12:18,276
That's the best invention.
234
00:12:18,278 --> 00:12:19,779
It's three-dimensional.
235
00:12:21,014 --> 00:12:23,080
Ma, the whole reason
I moved out here was to move on.
236
00:12:23,082 --> 00:12:24,084
That's what I'm doing.
237
00:12:24,384 --> 00:12:25,652
Where's De Niro?
238
00:12:26,786 --> 00:12:30,286
Thanks, Ma, but I'm telling you,
these ain't my shows.
239
00:12:30,288 --> 00:12:31,755
I just get paid to clap.
240
00:12:31,757 --> 00:12:33,389
Sometimes I ask a few questions,
but I blend in.
241
00:12:33,391 --> 00:12:34,890
That's what I do.
I blend in.
242
00:12:34,892 --> 00:12:37,125
And the acting?
This guy's incredible.
243
00:12:37,127 --> 00:12:38,893
I'm not depressed.
244
00:12:38,895 --> 00:12:40,861
Take a look at this.
Words cannot describe this.
245
00:12:40,863 --> 00:12:44,099
Are you trying to tell me,
for no money down,
246
00:12:44,101 --> 00:12:45,703
I can buy a house?
247
00:12:45,967 --> 00:12:47,334
Where's Scorsese
when you need him?
248
00:12:47,336 --> 00:12:49,038
Ma, I gotta go.
249
00:12:49,271 --> 00:12:50,437
And that mustache.
250
00:12:50,439 --> 00:12:52,339
And then, as we're going
through the show,
251
00:12:52,341 --> 00:12:53,839
my producers and I are thinking,
252
00:12:53,841 --> 00:12:55,441
"Hey, doesn't this guy
look familiar?"
253
00:12:55,443 --> 00:12:58,243
It delivers a little grip
without slip.
254
00:12:58,245 --> 00:12:59,977
Grip with no slip!
255
00:12:59,979 --> 00:13:01,914
Can we freeze on that
for a second?
256
00:13:01,916 --> 00:13:03,749
And bring back
the previous one.
257
00:13:03,751 --> 00:13:05,983
Put a mustache on
the clean-shaven one. Ta-da!
258
00:13:05,985 --> 00:13:07,150
I don't know about you, Spider,
259
00:13:07,152 --> 00:13:09,322
but I'm definitely seeing
a resemblance here.
260
00:13:10,122 --> 00:13:12,789
As we're going through the
tapes, we keep seeing this guy.
261
00:13:12,791 --> 00:13:14,326
Look, it's him.
262
00:13:14,727 --> 00:13:17,460
That's him. And that's him.
263
00:13:17,462 --> 00:13:19,930
In case you thought our
audience member skills
264
00:13:19,932 --> 00:13:22,797
were limited,
he kicks butt too!
265
00:13:22,799 --> 00:13:26,435
I mean, this guy's everywhere.
266
00:13:26,437 --> 00:13:28,069
All right,
anybody with information
267
00:13:28,071 --> 00:13:30,939
leading to the identification
of this person,
268
00:13:30,941 --> 00:13:34,208
who we are officially
naming The Clapper,
269
00:13:34,210 --> 00:13:35,808
please get in contact with us.
270
00:13:35,810 --> 00:13:38,044
We need to know
who this man is,
271
00:13:38,046 --> 00:13:40,450
and we need him on this show.
Spider, take us out.
272
00:13:50,457 --> 00:13:51,989
If Louise
finds out about this,
273
00:13:51,991 --> 00:13:54,294
she's never gonna let me
work again, you know?
274
00:13:55,194 --> 00:13:57,127
She flips out if you wear
the same shirt twice.
275
00:13:57,129 --> 00:13:58,764
You saw what she did
to Yugoslavia, right?
276
00:13:58,965 --> 00:14:00,531
Being a face in the crowd,
that's our thing.
277
00:14:00,533 --> 00:14:02,398
- I'm done.
- You worry too much, Eddie.
278
00:14:02,400 --> 00:14:04,867
Nobody's probably ever gonna see
that sort of TV show anyway.
279
00:14:04,869 --> 00:14:06,035
Yeah? I'm telling ya.
280
00:14:06,037 --> 00:14:07,937
- The movie star, huh?
- Yeah.
281
00:14:07,939 --> 00:14:10,539
I saw you on the
Stillerman Show last night.
282
00:14:10,541 --> 00:14:12,774
- Yeah, thanks, Alfie.
- I was saying to my wife.
283
00:14:12,776 --> 00:14:15,811
Saw you on the Stillerman Show.
That was awesome.
284
00:14:15,813 --> 00:14:18,379
You are totally fucked, dude!
285
00:14:18,381 --> 00:14:19,980
Just tell Louise
I'm sick or something
286
00:14:19,982 --> 00:14:23,250
and find out what she's thinking
or what she knows, okay?
287
00:14:23,252 --> 00:14:24,551
All right.
288
00:14:24,553 --> 00:14:26,519
You're a star!
I give you some fries!
289
00:14:26,521 --> 00:14:28,021
How you doing, Alfie?
290
00:14:28,023 --> 00:14:29,522
Ma, I'm not trying
to get discovered.
291
00:14:29,524 --> 00:14:31,791
I just wanna work.
That's all I wanna do.
292
00:14:31,793 --> 00:14:33,526
Well, Gladys...
it's obvious, honey...
293
00:14:33,528 --> 00:14:36,462
thinks these disguises
are ridiculous.
294
00:14:36,464 --> 00:14:37,997
Yeah. Ma...
295
00:14:37,999 --> 00:14:40,497
She said the beard,
the mustache...
296
00:14:40,499 --> 00:14:43,801
Ma, Ma, I'm not trying
to get discovered.
297
00:14:43,803 --> 00:14:45,568
I'm just trying
to not get fired, you know,
298
00:14:45,570 --> 00:14:47,337
which has probably
already happened.
299
00:14:47,339 --> 00:14:49,306
I gotta go.
Tell Gladys I said hi
300
00:14:49,308 --> 00:14:53,075
and to lay off this TV stuff
because it's not helpful.
301
00:14:53,077 --> 00:14:54,976
I'll try and
shut that thing off.
302
00:14:54,978 --> 00:14:56,114
Okay, bye.
303
00:14:57,448 --> 00:15:01,215
Hey, hey, buddy,
you leave your stuff!
304
00:15:01,217 --> 00:15:03,450
- Judy in yet?
- Throw the garbage over there.
305
00:15:03,452 --> 00:15:05,052
Excuse me, is Judy in yet?
306
00:15:05,054 --> 00:15:06,420
Wow.
307
00:15:06,422 --> 00:15:08,021
No, fuck you.
What do you need?
308
00:15:08,023 --> 00:15:09,390
- What?
- Can I help? Fuck you!
309
00:15:09,392 --> 00:15:11,324
How can I help?
Fuck you.
310
00:15:11,326 --> 00:15:13,327
Wow.
311
00:15:13,329 --> 00:15:15,261
That is...
That is really loud.
312
00:15:15,263 --> 00:15:18,063
You should put a paper towel or
something on that 'cause it's...
313
00:15:18,065 --> 00:15:21,033
I know, I know.
Yeah, I know.
314
00:15:21,035 --> 00:15:22,500
- It's loud out here.
- Listen, listen.
315
00:15:22,502 --> 00:15:25,136
Pick up your garbage
and go fuck yourself.
316
00:15:25,138 --> 00:15:27,504
- Yeah, no, thanks.
- Thank you, buddy.
317
00:15:27,506 --> 00:15:29,041
Just get out of here.
318
00:15:29,409 --> 00:15:31,542
Hey, Judy! Judy!
319
00:15:31,544 --> 00:15:33,110
Over here. Buddy!
320
00:15:33,112 --> 00:15:35,311
Hey, buddy, where you going?
This not all right!
321
00:15:35,313 --> 00:15:36,412
Judy!
322
00:15:36,414 --> 00:15:37,784
Buddy!
323
00:15:39,384 --> 00:15:40,450
- Hey.
- Hey.
324
00:15:40,452 --> 00:15:42,351
Look at you.
You look like...
325
00:15:42,353 --> 00:15:43,886
You're outside of your box.
326
00:15:43,888 --> 00:15:45,523
Are you kidding me right now?
This is crazy.
327
00:15:47,591 --> 00:15:48,524
You're like a real person.
I didn't even know.
328
00:15:48,526 --> 00:15:50,290
- You look normal.
- I'm grabbing a soda,
329
00:15:50,292 --> 00:15:52,459
I have a 20-minute break, so...
330
00:15:52,461 --> 00:15:54,063
Okay, great.
331
00:15:54,464 --> 00:15:56,029
- Can I walk you?
- Sure.
332
00:15:56,031 --> 00:15:58,197
Yeah, 'cause I was just
driving around anyway, so...
333
00:15:58,199 --> 00:15:59,932
I'll just add that
to my list of errands.
334
00:15:59,934 --> 00:16:01,335
- Get a soda, you know?
- Great.
335
00:16:01,337 --> 00:16:03,505
- Cool. Light is green.
- Great.
336
00:16:03,905 --> 00:16:05,240
The light's green.
337
00:16:07,007 --> 00:16:08,910
Get whatever you want,
by the way.
338
00:16:09,477 --> 00:16:12,477
Oh, I have money.
It's okay.
339
00:16:12,479 --> 00:16:14,879
It's on me. This one is on me.
I've been thinking about this
340
00:16:14,881 --> 00:16:16,981
ever since I first got gas
at your place.
341
00:16:16,983 --> 00:16:20,050
I pulled in, and you were like,
"Can I help you?"
342
00:16:20,052 --> 00:16:22,288
And I was like,
"Yeah, yeah, for sure."
343
00:16:23,188 --> 00:16:25,554
You were talking about
how you'd like to go to Mexico
344
00:16:25,556 --> 00:16:27,089
'cause you got a goat
or something...
345
00:16:27,091 --> 00:16:27,957
Grady.
346
00:16:27,959 --> 00:16:29,025
- Yeah, he's got one horn.
- Totally.
347
00:16:29,027 --> 00:16:32,027
Got a one-horned goat.
I'm not gonna forget that.
348
00:16:32,029 --> 00:16:35,029
- You're too funny.
- How about I get the food?
349
00:16:35,031 --> 00:16:37,167
I'll get the food,
and you go sit down.
350
00:16:37,367 --> 00:16:39,966
Oh, get us a table inside.
There's never anybody in there.
351
00:16:39,968 --> 00:16:41,504
- Really?
- It's totally weird. Yeah.
352
00:16:41,938 --> 00:16:44,305
- Just less people, you know?
- Okay, yeah.
353
00:16:44,307 --> 00:16:46,309
- I'll go inside.
- Okay.
354
00:16:48,476 --> 00:16:49,608
Wow.
355
00:16:49,610 --> 00:16:52,279
Yeah. Fries are the best, right?
356
00:16:54,114 --> 00:16:56,515
It's crazy, right?
There's just nobody in here.
357
00:16:56,517 --> 00:16:58,286
It's like my quiet spot.
358
00:16:58,552 --> 00:17:00,150
Yeah, it's great.
359
00:17:00,152 --> 00:17:02,387
You know what's great is
you get a break from work.
360
00:17:02,389 --> 00:17:03,324
That's so great.
361
00:17:04,424 --> 00:17:05,256
Yeah, I'm just really worried
about getting fired.
362
00:17:05,258 --> 00:17:07,526
Fired?
They're not gonna fire you.
363
00:17:07,927 --> 00:17:09,258
If they fired you,
364
00:17:09,260 --> 00:17:11,261
getting gas there
would just be like getting gas.
365
00:17:11,263 --> 00:17:12,529
I wouldn't come back.
366
00:17:12,531 --> 00:17:14,129
They would lose my business
for sure.
367
00:17:14,131 --> 00:17:14,863
Thanks.
368
00:17:14,865 --> 00:17:16,467
- I'm serious.
- What about you?
369
00:17:16,935 --> 00:17:21,202
I mean, you must be so excited
about all your shows.
370
00:17:21,204 --> 00:17:23,038
I wouldn't...
I can't imagine doing that.
371
00:17:23,040 --> 00:17:26,340
It's all right.
I mean, you know, it's a job.
372
00:17:26,342 --> 00:17:27,574
I got this problem though.
373
00:17:27,576 --> 00:17:30,413
Do you know about
the Stillerman TV show?
374
00:17:30,679 --> 00:17:32,481
Do you know that thing on TV?
375
00:17:33,014 --> 00:17:34,981
My TV broke a while ago.
376
00:17:34,983 --> 00:17:37,183
I'm not really even
a TV girl anyway.
377
00:17:37,185 --> 00:17:39,488
Hmm. Yeah, okay.
378
00:17:40,155 --> 00:17:42,320
Don't worry about
this firing stuff.
379
00:17:42,322 --> 00:17:43,590
Honestly.
380
00:17:44,258 --> 00:17:45,958
Like, whatever's gonna happen
is gonna happen,
381
00:17:45,960 --> 00:17:46,959
or whatever those people say.
382
00:17:46,961 --> 00:17:48,659
Or something like that.
Did I say that right?
383
00:17:48,661 --> 00:17:50,728
Yeah, but even if everything
didn't work out,
384
00:17:50,730 --> 00:17:52,697
I would just go back
to the shelter with Grady.
385
00:17:52,699 --> 00:17:54,332
You know?
And there's just so many...
386
00:17:54,334 --> 00:17:57,132
there's all those freaked out
kind of animals.
387
00:17:57,134 --> 00:18:00,170
And then there are
these half-pig, half...
388
00:18:00,172 --> 00:18:03,706
- Half a pig.
- Yes. He wears an eye patch.
389
00:18:03,708 --> 00:18:05,911
- I know.
- Yeah.
390
00:18:06,242 --> 00:18:08,643
I guess I'm just
saying it wrong, really,
391
00:18:08,645 --> 00:18:12,179
but it's just amazing,
392
00:18:12,181 --> 00:18:14,314
- Yeah.
- I don't know. Someday.
393
00:18:14,316 --> 00:18:17,085
Well, I would miss you
if you went to Mexico.
394
00:18:19,321 --> 00:18:20,356
You're not married?
395
00:18:20,723 --> 00:18:23,254
Hmm? Uh, no. Yeah.
396
00:18:23,256 --> 00:18:24,292
What? No.
397
00:18:28,228 --> 00:18:30,398
Whoa! What?
398
00:18:31,130 --> 00:18:33,431
Whoa! What?
You gotta be kidding me.
399
00:18:33,433 --> 00:18:35,002
Unbelievable.
400
00:18:35,302 --> 00:18:37,434
Well, there goes
the peace and quiet.
401
00:18:37,436 --> 00:18:39,036
Okay, Donny!
402
00:18:39,038 --> 00:18:42,309
Let's get this piece of shit
out of here, baby!
403
00:18:43,109 --> 00:18:45,340
Thank you very much, buddy.
404
00:18:45,342 --> 00:18:49,314
Bye, Tony.
Thank you, buddy, thank you.
405
00:18:49,481 --> 00:18:51,779
So we received such positive
feedback from all of you
406
00:18:51,781 --> 00:18:53,582
about our Clapper friend
407
00:18:53,584 --> 00:18:56,451
that we're starting a new
segment tonight called...
408
00:18:56,453 --> 00:18:59,152
"Who is The Clapper?"
409
00:18:59,154 --> 00:19:01,788
So in our relentless quest
410
00:19:01,790 --> 00:19:05,491
to find our questioning,
clapping disguise man,
411
00:19:05,493 --> 00:19:07,060
we took it to the streets
412
00:19:07,062 --> 00:19:09,161
to ask this
one important question.
413
00:19:09,163 --> 00:19:10,630
Do you recognize
this gentleman here?
414
00:19:10,632 --> 00:19:13,267
This guy? He looks like
a straight-up idiot to me.
415
00:19:13,467 --> 00:19:14,636
Loser!
416
00:19:15,803 --> 00:19:16,936
He wants to get his picture
in the newspapers.
417
00:19:16,938 --> 00:19:19,536
Rob! Rob! We're from
The Jayme Stillerman Show,
418
00:19:19,538 --> 00:19:22,072
I love you. I love the Giants.
It's a great team.
419
00:19:22,074 --> 00:19:24,108
Do you recognize
this man right here?
420
00:19:24,110 --> 00:19:25,243
He looks familiar.
He looks like...
421
00:19:25,245 --> 00:19:27,677
maybe like a porn star
or something like...
422
00:19:27,679 --> 00:19:29,646
a doggy-style type
porn star.
423
00:19:29,648 --> 00:19:32,782
And just as we felt
our search was headed nowhere,
424
00:19:32,784 --> 00:19:34,716
right in our very own
backyard,
425
00:19:34,718 --> 00:19:37,389
we ran into a man
named Chris Plork.
426
00:19:38,055 --> 00:19:40,121
Do you recognize
this gentleman here?
427
00:19:40,123 --> 00:19:42,490
Yeah, I know this guy, yeah.
428
00:19:42,492 --> 00:19:44,059
Oh, my God.
429
00:19:44,061 --> 00:19:45,659
You actually know this man?
430
00:19:45,661 --> 00:19:47,261
You know The Clapper?
431
00:19:47,263 --> 00:19:48,197
Yeah.
432
00:19:49,165 --> 00:19:50,431
Tell me a little something
about him.
433
00:19:50,433 --> 00:19:52,769
He saw the stuff on the TV,
and he's like, you know,
434
00:19:53,800 --> 00:19:54,434
what's going on, you know?
435
00:19:54,436 --> 00:19:56,301
Does he have
any demands for us?
436
00:19:56,303 --> 00:19:58,403
If The Clapper
could talk to you,
437
00:19:58,405 --> 00:20:00,705
he probably would say
he wants you just to know
438
00:20:00,707 --> 00:20:02,306
he would just want it
to be okay for him
439
00:20:02,308 --> 00:20:04,442
to keep doing
his TV shows and stuff.
440
00:20:04,444 --> 00:20:05,611
Really.
441
00:20:05,613 --> 00:20:08,116
Can you get us in touch
with The Clapper?
442
00:20:10,282 --> 00:20:12,118
Oh, my God.
443
00:20:13,618 --> 00:20:15,352
I was there.
They came up to me.
444
00:20:15,354 --> 00:20:17,519
I was waiting
to talk to Louise.
445
00:20:17,521 --> 00:20:18,787
Did they even talk to Louise?
446
00:20:18,789 --> 00:20:21,490
No! She said she
didn't know you.
447
00:20:21,492 --> 00:20:24,226
To who? You just said
that she didn't talk...
448
00:20:24,228 --> 00:20:27,563
They had some kind
of cardboard cutout
449
00:20:27,565 --> 00:20:29,430
or something of you.
450
00:20:29,432 --> 00:20:30,864
- What?
- Yeah.
451
00:20:30,866 --> 00:20:33,202
It was beautiful.
Looked nice.
452
00:20:34,437 --> 00:20:37,273
Did Louise see
this cardboard cutout?
453
00:20:37,605 --> 00:20:40,807
She seen it sitting right there.
It was right there. Yeah.
454
00:20:40,809 --> 00:20:42,378
Then we don't have jobs.
455
00:20:42,844 --> 00:20:44,645
Yugoslavia said
the same thing.
456
00:20:44,846 --> 00:20:46,645
Yeah, well, he's right.
457
00:20:46,647 --> 00:20:49,181
Why couldn't you just say
you didn't know anything?
458
00:20:49,183 --> 00:20:52,586
I tried, but the producer guy
came up to me with his number
459
00:20:53,653 --> 00:20:55,252
in case you want
to call him.
460
00:20:55,254 --> 00:20:57,590
I don't want anything
to do with the show, Chris.
461
00:20:57,889 --> 00:20:59,722
You need to call him
and tell him
462
00:20:59,724 --> 00:21:03,596
that you thought you knew what
you were talking about, but...
463
00:21:03,896 --> 00:21:05,827
you know, or something,
but you didn't.
464
00:21:05,829 --> 00:21:07,499
And that's it, all right?
465
00:21:08,199 --> 00:21:09,731
Listen, I get it.
I'm not mad.
466
00:21:09,733 --> 00:21:13,567
I just need you to undo whatever
that was that happened there.
467
00:21:13,569 --> 00:21:16,139
You never know. Good things
could come out of this.
468
00:21:16,472 --> 00:21:19,806
Yugoslavia say he'd get us on
one of the Law and Order shows.
469
00:21:19,808 --> 00:21:21,307
What?
470
00:21:21,309 --> 00:21:23,843
Attention!
471
00:21:23,845 --> 00:21:25,513
Is that English?
472
00:21:25,515 --> 00:21:26,746
Eddie, what does that say?
473
00:21:26,748 --> 00:21:29,383
Attention, everybody,
attention!
474
00:21:33,219 --> 00:21:35,754
Pongasela.
Pongasela.
475
00:21:35,756 --> 00:21:38,659
Pongasela!
476
00:21:40,226 --> 00:21:42,159
No matter what,
if you win or if you lose,
477
00:21:42,161 --> 00:21:44,363
you need to put the wig on.
That was the deal.
478
00:22:04,580 --> 00:22:07,184
Judge Hermanos, yeah!
479
00:22:10,452 --> 00:22:12,555
I don't know what the hell
that was, but that was horrible.
480
00:22:12,721 --> 00:22:14,223
No doubt.
481
00:22:14,656 --> 00:22:15,857
How many more of these we got?
482
00:22:16,223 --> 00:22:18,658
Got like one
in like half an hour.
483
00:22:18,660 --> 00:22:20,529
At least it's something, right?
484
00:22:22,828 --> 00:22:24,261
Gracias, right?
485
00:22:24,263 --> 00:22:25,565
Next in line.
486
00:22:26,900 --> 00:22:28,632
I want to take Judy
on another date,
487
00:22:28,634 --> 00:22:31,872
but like even French fries
are a stretch right now.
488
00:22:32,572 --> 00:22:34,804
You gotta talk to Louise, man.
And for real.
489
00:22:34,806 --> 00:22:37,607
Tell her I just had nothing
to do with the Stillerman Show.
490
00:22:37,609 --> 00:22:40,677
Dude, dude, you're the dude!
Look! It's you! You're the guy!
491
00:22:40,679 --> 00:22:42,445
- You're you, man.
- What?
492
00:22:42,447 --> 00:22:44,979
You're The Clapper guy.
That's you!
493
00:22:44,981 --> 00:22:47,651
Dude, that's... that's you!
494
00:22:48,419 --> 00:22:49,985
And you're, what, a potato?
495
00:22:49,987 --> 00:22:53,290
Hey, man, you say potato.
I say nice mustache.
496
00:22:54,224 --> 00:22:55,259
It's okay, Eddie.
497
00:22:56,293 --> 00:22:57,291
Man, we were saying
how funny you are on the...
498
00:22:57,293 --> 00:22:58,358
We were saying
how funny you are.
499
00:22:58,360 --> 00:23:01,328
Yeah, the problem is
I wasn't trying to be funny.
500
00:23:01,330 --> 00:23:03,295
I didn't even want
to be on the show, okay?
501
00:23:03,297 --> 00:23:04,930
Yeah, they just sort of
took over my life.
502
00:23:04,932 --> 00:23:07,366
They did whatever
the fuck they wanted,
503
00:23:07,368 --> 00:23:09,501
You know what we should do?
We should put him in a net.
504
00:23:09,503 --> 00:23:12,403
And then we should bring him in
and get like a reward.
505
00:23:12,405 --> 00:23:14,404
Great, potato man.
I'd love to see you try that.
506
00:23:14,406 --> 00:23:16,574
Eddie, he's a potato.
Fuck him.
507
00:23:16,576 --> 00:23:18,442
- No, don't fuck him.
- Mom, that's the clap man!
508
00:23:18,444 --> 00:23:20,810
- It's him!
- That's not nice! Knock it off!
509
00:23:20,812 --> 00:23:22,679
You gonna be
Mr. Mashed Potato.
510
00:23:22,681 --> 00:23:24,448
No, no, he's right, yeah.
511
00:23:24,450 --> 00:23:26,716
You've seen me on TV.
I'm the clap guy, right?
512
00:23:26,718 --> 00:23:30,252
I'm The Clapper. See?
It's me. I clap!
513
00:23:30,254 --> 00:23:32,853
Hey, look at that!
Clap, clap, right?
514
00:23:32,855 --> 00:23:34,922
Ha-ha-ha-ha!
And I laugh!
515
00:23:34,924 --> 00:23:37,324
Not just a little chuckle, no.
516
00:23:37,326 --> 00:23:39,759
Like a big laugh,
like ha-ha-ha-ha!
517
00:23:39,761 --> 00:23:42,595
Ha-ha-ha-ha!
Ha-ha-ha-ha!
518
00:23:42,597 --> 00:23:45,733
Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
519
00:23:45,735 --> 00:23:46,966
Fuck you!
520
00:23:46,968 --> 00:23:49,768
Oh, come on!
Clap for us, Clapper!
521
00:23:49,770 --> 00:23:51,571
Do it!
522
00:23:51,573 --> 00:23:54,242
Do it! Do it!
523
00:24:03,850 --> 00:24:05,519
Ran out of gas!
524
00:24:11,555 --> 00:24:14,656
Ran out of gas,
but luckily, I was right here.
525
00:24:14,658 --> 00:24:19,028
Eddie, I still feel so bad
about your car getting towed.
526
00:24:19,030 --> 00:24:22,363
Yeah, but what are you
gonna do, you know?
527
00:24:22,365 --> 00:24:25,365
Is shove-it-up-your-ass-
credit-card-guy still here?
528
00:24:25,367 --> 00:24:28,835
No, he's...
he's not on tonight.
529
00:24:28,837 --> 00:24:32,541
- Great.
- Um, are you okay?
530
00:24:32,974 --> 00:24:34,309
Yeah.
531
00:24:34,876 --> 00:24:36,612
Yeah, I'm good.
I just...
532
00:24:37,511 --> 00:24:38,879
You know...
533
00:24:39,913 --> 00:24:42,913
maybe it's better that you
don't have a TV right now.
534
00:24:42,915 --> 00:24:44,985
Never mind.
535
00:24:45,352 --> 00:24:48,053
Your microphone's working,
the speaker.
536
00:24:48,055 --> 00:24:49,952
- Yeah.
- ♪ Lotta people out there ♪
537
00:24:49,954 --> 00:24:51,322
Yeah.
538
00:24:51,324 --> 00:24:53,923
Hey, is that Brian Wilson?
539
00:24:53,925 --> 00:24:55,958
Yeah. "Love and Mercy."
540
00:24:55,960 --> 00:24:57,592
- You kiddin' me?
- Yeah.
541
00:24:57,594 --> 00:24:59,832
That's unbelievable,
I love that song.
542
00:25:00,398 --> 00:25:02,732
Like, who talks like that?
Who says "crummy" anymore?
543
00:25:02,734 --> 00:25:05,399
My father used to say that
when I was little.
544
00:25:05,401 --> 00:25:07,002
Yeah, that's my favorite part.
545
00:25:07,004 --> 00:25:08,273
Yeah.
546
00:25:09,407 --> 00:25:12,839
♪ I was sittin'
In a crummy movie ♪
547
00:25:12,841 --> 00:25:15,812
♪ With my hand on my chin ♪
548
00:25:19,814 --> 00:25:22,384
You got a way of making things
all right, you know?
549
00:25:23,752 --> 00:25:25,550
- Thanks.
- Whole five bucks.
550
00:25:25,552 --> 00:25:28,020
You only ever get a little bit
of gas at a time.
551
00:25:28,022 --> 00:25:29,555
You noticed, huh?
552
00:25:29,557 --> 00:25:33,427
Well, I like to come by
and see you, you know?
553
00:25:34,961 --> 00:25:36,794
♪ Ooh ♪
554
00:25:36,796 --> 00:25:40,600
Yeah, I like...
I like seeing you, as well.
555
00:25:41,666 --> 00:25:42,834
Yeah.
556
00:25:44,569 --> 00:25:46,768
I got something.
I got something for you.
557
00:25:46,770 --> 00:25:48,307
I almost forgot. Hold on.
558
00:25:52,942 --> 00:25:58,415
♪ Ah ♪
559
00:26:00,747 --> 00:26:01,547
♪ Ooh ♪
560
00:26:01,549 --> 00:26:06,085
♪ Oh ♪
561
00:26:06,087 --> 00:26:09,824
♪ Oh ♪
562
00:26:09,990 --> 00:26:14,658
♪ Ah ♪
563
00:26:14,660 --> 00:26:16,026
♪ Oh ♪
564
00:26:16,028 --> 00:26:18,129
I was showing you
the idea, right?
565
00:26:18,131 --> 00:26:19,965
Just flash cards,
I don't know.
566
00:26:19,967 --> 00:26:22,465
You don't even need it now.
The speaker's fixed.
567
00:26:22,467 --> 00:26:24,870
It's still a good idea.
568
00:26:25,103 --> 00:26:26,472
It is what it is.
569
00:26:26,671 --> 00:26:29,505
- I don't know, it's all right.
- It's great.
570
00:26:29,507 --> 00:26:32,711
Yeah, I'm gonna get the gas.
571
00:26:35,413 --> 00:26:37,112
I'm invisible.
572
00:26:37,114 --> 00:26:39,147
You can't see me.
I'm invisible.
573
00:26:39,149 --> 00:26:40,581
No one can see me.
574
00:26:40,583 --> 00:26:43,683
No one can see me.
I'm invisible.
575
00:26:43,685 --> 00:26:46,823
I'm invisible, Judy.
No one can see me.
576
00:26:47,490 --> 00:26:49,756
- Hi, Thomas.
- Really, I need some water.
577
00:26:49,758 --> 00:26:50,793
Yes.
578
00:26:58,165 --> 00:27:00,032
Hey! Hey!
579
00:27:00,034 --> 00:27:01,633
What the hell, man?
580
00:27:01,635 --> 00:27:03,868
Eddie, it's okay.
That's Naked Thomas.
581
00:27:03,870 --> 00:27:06,774
His wife left him, and it says
it makes him feel better.
582
00:27:07,106 --> 00:27:10,741
The water.
It's weird, right?
583
00:27:10,743 --> 00:27:12,679
Uh, yeah.
584
00:27:12,844 --> 00:27:14,514
Weird. You think?
585
00:27:14,846 --> 00:27:16,615
No, he's harmless.
586
00:27:17,048 --> 00:27:19,782
All right, well, maybe I should
stick around a little bit
587
00:27:19,784 --> 00:27:21,117
to make sure, you know?
588
00:27:21,119 --> 00:27:22,784
Right? You never know
with people like that,
589
00:27:22,786 --> 00:27:23,820
especially naked ones.
590
00:27:23,822 --> 00:27:25,654
I got a chair, all right?
591
00:27:25,656 --> 00:27:27,222
It's right in the car here.
592
00:27:27,224 --> 00:27:28,993
I feel really bad for him.
593
00:27:29,592 --> 00:27:31,695
He must have
really loved her.
594
00:27:32,027 --> 00:27:35,798
That or he's just crazy, right?
595
00:27:37,533 --> 00:27:39,799
Is that all right if I sit here
for a little bit?
596
00:27:39,801 --> 00:27:40,970
- Yeah.
- Okay.
597
00:27:43,804 --> 00:27:46,473
- Eddie?
- Yeah? Huh?
598
00:27:47,540 --> 00:27:49,842
Do you think it's weird
that I'm working here?
599
00:27:49,844 --> 00:27:50,678
What?
600
00:27:51,544 --> 00:27:54,414
Do you think it's weird,
me working here?
601
00:27:56,215 --> 00:27:57,914
I mean, at the gas station?
602
00:27:57,916 --> 00:28:01,987
It's like the kind of job
that's like really blah.
603
00:28:02,621 --> 00:28:04,621
But do you know
why I work here?
604
00:28:04,623 --> 00:28:06,222
I don't think it's blah.
605
00:28:06,224 --> 00:28:08,926
I mean, maybe a little,
I guess.
606
00:28:09,693 --> 00:28:11,826
No, I mean,
like I need the money, right?
607
00:28:11,828 --> 00:28:15,830
But I don't know.
I mean, sometimes at night,
608
00:28:15,832 --> 00:28:20,067
it feels like
all the normal people,
609
00:28:20,069 --> 00:28:21,804
they just disappear.
610
00:28:22,270 --> 00:28:23,872
Can't argue with that.
611
00:28:24,840 --> 00:28:27,974
But like everybody
is kind of nowhere
612
00:28:27,976 --> 00:28:29,578
on a night like tonight.
613
00:28:30,978 --> 00:28:32,547
Does that make sense?
614
00:28:33,281 --> 00:28:35,583
Or am I just talking crazy?
615
00:28:39,686 --> 00:28:41,988
Yeah, no, I, I understand.
616
00:28:47,560 --> 00:28:49,858
I really liked
our French fry date.
617
00:28:49,860 --> 00:28:51,629
Me too.
618
00:28:53,598 --> 00:28:56,230
I love how weird you are,
you know?
619
00:28:56,232 --> 00:28:58,602
You're like totally wacky,
like me.
620
00:29:03,006 --> 00:29:06,106
I was hoping to save up to take
you to dinner someplace nice,
621
00:29:06,108 --> 00:29:09,742
but...
maybe we could just do
622
00:29:09,744 --> 00:29:11,746
another French fry thing
until then?
623
00:29:12,614 --> 00:29:14,083
- I'd love that.
- Yeah.
624
00:29:14,749 --> 00:29:17,652
All right, yeah.
That'd be great.
625
00:29:18,553 --> 00:29:20,522
I'll put it on my calendar.
626
00:29:20,954 --> 00:29:22,623
Me too.
627
00:29:23,957 --> 00:29:27,828
This is actually great,
you know, in a weird way.
628
00:29:28,228 --> 00:29:29,529
Definitely.
629
00:29:30,630 --> 00:29:33,196
He was just here,
yelling and clapping,
630
00:29:33,198 --> 00:29:34,764
and I just put it
on my Instagram,
631
00:29:34,766 --> 00:29:36,567
and I already have
a thousand hearts.
632
00:29:36,569 --> 00:29:40,636
Wow! Did you see that?
Personally, I don't know
633
00:29:40,638 --> 00:29:41,736
what the hell was
going on out there,
634
00:29:41,738 --> 00:29:44,673
but it seems our
Clapper has a baked potato
635
00:29:44,675 --> 00:29:46,707
and some sort of an outlaw
upset with him
636
00:29:46,709 --> 00:29:49,644
and his actions right out
there on Hollywood Boulevard.
637
00:29:49,646 --> 00:29:52,014
Spider, I'm a little worried
about the guy.
638
00:30:15,702 --> 00:30:17,634
I'm invisible.
No one can see me.
639
00:30:17,636 --> 00:30:19,768
I'm invisible.
No one can see me.
640
00:30:19,770 --> 00:30:21,874
I'm invisible.
No one can see me.
641
00:30:26,911 --> 00:30:30,679
Hey, hey, hey!
What do you do, buddy?
642
00:30:30,681 --> 00:30:32,680
Hey, get out of here!
Why do you do this?
643
00:30:32,682 --> 00:30:35,683
Oh, my God. Oh, my...
What do you do?
644
00:30:35,685 --> 00:30:37,185
Is Hercules watching?
645
00:30:37,187 --> 00:30:40,687
No, no.
He is doing his thing. Wow.
646
00:30:40,689 --> 00:30:43,156
Hercules?
That's a great name.
647
00:30:43,158 --> 00:30:45,024
I think he's still mad at you.
648
00:30:45,026 --> 00:30:46,092
- Me?
- Yeah.
649
00:30:46,094 --> 00:30:47,229
He towed my car.
650
00:30:47,630 --> 00:30:49,160
He said that
you threw trash everywhere
651
00:30:49,162 --> 00:30:52,831
and that you blocked his most
profitable pump purposefully.
652
00:30:52,833 --> 00:30:54,634
There's just no mistakes
with this guy, huh?
653
00:30:54,636 --> 00:30:56,100
Let's get out of here.
654
00:30:56,102 --> 00:30:59,337
Oh, my God.
What did you do?
655
00:30:59,339 --> 00:31:01,742
I never see no people
like this, buddy!
656
00:31:06,878 --> 00:31:09,011
- Is this weird?
- Hmm?
657
00:31:09,013 --> 00:31:10,081
Is it weird?
658
00:31:11,215 --> 00:31:12,283
Yeah.
659
00:31:12,850 --> 00:31:14,919
I mean, I've never
been here before.
660
00:31:15,819 --> 00:31:18,722
It's just nice to see
the animals not behind bars.
661
00:31:18,922 --> 00:31:19,991
Mm.
662
00:31:20,257 --> 00:31:22,060
I mean, like, you know, they...
663
00:31:22,358 --> 00:31:24,691
There's just nobody
stuck somewhere
664
00:31:24,693 --> 00:31:26,160
that you don't want to be.
665
00:31:26,162 --> 00:31:29,199
No, yeah. Hmm? Right.
666
00:31:34,769 --> 00:31:36,872
You asked if I was married.
667
00:31:37,270 --> 00:31:38,903
- Uh-oh.
- No, no, no, no.
668
00:31:38,905 --> 00:31:40,672
It's not...
It's nothing bad.
669
00:31:40,674 --> 00:31:42,710
I mean, I...
670
00:31:44,343 --> 00:31:46,779
Um, I was.
A long time ago.
671
00:31:47,714 --> 00:31:49,249
Diane. We grew up together
672
00:31:49,849 --> 00:31:53,886
And then one day,
she just was gone.
673
00:31:57,022 --> 00:31:58,119
She left you?
674
00:31:58,121 --> 00:31:59,091
Yeah.
675
00:31:59,956 --> 00:32:01,189
No, not like that.
676
00:32:01,191 --> 00:32:03,861
Like... the earth.
677
00:32:06,830 --> 00:32:09,030
Like one day we were
talking about traveling
678
00:32:09,032 --> 00:32:12,000
and all that cool stuff,
and then...
679
00:32:12,002 --> 00:32:14,033
and then all of a sudden,
she got sick,
680
00:32:14,035 --> 00:32:16,202
and the next thing I knew,
she was gone.
681
00:32:16,204 --> 00:32:18,073
And, um, you know.
682
00:32:18,473 --> 00:32:20,174
I'm sorry.
683
00:32:20,375 --> 00:32:21,809
Yeah.
684
00:32:23,177 --> 00:32:24,746
It's okay.
685
00:32:28,816 --> 00:32:30,985
I'm sorry about
all these cheap dates.
686
00:32:32,185 --> 00:32:33,886
No, really, like...
687
00:32:35,822 --> 00:32:37,921
There's like all this
TV stuff going on.
688
00:32:37,923 --> 00:32:39,992
I'm just a little out of it.
689
00:32:40,357 --> 00:32:44,095
But I'm gonna bounce back.
690
00:32:45,931 --> 00:32:47,329
- That's how it is.
- Yeah.
691
00:32:47,331 --> 00:32:48,867
Right?
692
00:32:50,334 --> 00:32:51,499
What about you?
693
00:32:51,501 --> 00:32:53,502
Like, you want to
end up in Mexico
694
00:32:53,504 --> 00:32:57,338
and do, you know,
that place with the goat,
695
00:32:57,340 --> 00:33:00,975
and just do,
like, goat stuff?
696
00:33:00,977 --> 00:33:04,276
Yeah, I would like to,
you know,
697
00:33:04,278 --> 00:33:05,945
have my own place someday.
698
00:33:05,947 --> 00:33:07,947
It would be nice, you know,
699
00:33:07,949 --> 00:33:11,285
to start a shelter
or a pet store.
700
00:33:12,520 --> 00:33:15,854
You know, I want something
with stability.
701
00:33:15,856 --> 00:33:19,223
Yeah, no, stability,
I get it, yeah.
702
00:33:19,225 --> 00:33:21,094
So you gonna do that or what?
703
00:33:21,461 --> 00:33:24,230
I... Yeah.
I'm trying to save up.
704
00:33:24,763 --> 00:33:26,765
Okay, yeah.
705
00:33:28,233 --> 00:33:32,801
Well, you know, I mean,
we could be partners.
706
00:33:32,803 --> 00:33:36,005
I could, I could come in
as a partner or something.
707
00:33:36,007 --> 00:33:40,812
Like if that was...
I could partner...
708
00:33:50,252 --> 00:33:54,320
Eddie, two nights ago,
some guy came to my station
709
00:33:54,322 --> 00:33:57,258
at two in the morning,
wearing a TV on his head,
710
00:33:57,557 --> 00:33:58,959
and it worked.
711
00:34:02,129 --> 00:34:03,264
What?
712
00:34:04,364 --> 00:34:06,129
And all I could think about
was how much I wished
713
00:34:06,131 --> 00:34:09,135
that you were there with me
to see that.
714
00:34:10,302 --> 00:34:11,737
Yeah.
715
00:34:12,270 --> 00:34:14,239
And I just knew.
716
00:34:17,342 --> 00:34:18,744
I...
717
00:34:20,945 --> 00:34:22,847
I just can't tell you...
718
00:34:24,582 --> 00:34:26,751
how nice this is...
719
00:34:28,418 --> 00:34:30,221
to just sit here with you...
720
00:34:32,288 --> 00:34:33,322
and just...
721
00:34:34,856 --> 00:34:36,959
Stare at the bones.
722
00:34:38,560 --> 00:34:42,163
Bones. Yeah.
723
00:34:51,337 --> 00:34:52,339
See ya.
724
00:34:53,506 --> 00:34:55,307
Yeah, for sure.
725
00:35:16,292 --> 00:35:17,458
Mr. Plork.
726
00:35:17,460 --> 00:35:19,196
Door's open. Come in.
727
00:35:19,895 --> 00:35:21,596
Oh, God. You're not...
728
00:35:21,598 --> 00:35:23,463
Come on.
I'm not doing that anymore.
729
00:35:23,465 --> 00:35:24,930
You never know.
730
00:35:24,932 --> 00:35:27,133
Catch me masturbating once,
shame on me.
731
00:35:27,135 --> 00:35:30,101
- Catch me twice, shame on you.
- All right.
732
00:35:30,103 --> 00:35:31,936
Listen, I was just with Judy
at the thing,
733
00:35:31,938 --> 00:35:34,105
and I got this
pretty incredible idea.
734
00:35:34,107 --> 00:35:35,376
Who?
735
00:35:35,975 --> 00:35:38,075
You got...
What are you watching?
736
00:35:38,077 --> 00:35:40,178
The video on the computer.
737
00:35:40,180 --> 00:35:43,880
They added some kind of weird
music in there for the Internet.
738
00:35:43,882 --> 00:35:46,617
What? What is...
739
00:35:46,619 --> 00:35:48,018
What is that?
740
00:35:48,020 --> 00:35:49,585
Your head is about to explode.
741
00:35:49,587 --> 00:35:51,419
That's my head.
That's me.
742
00:35:51,421 --> 00:35:53,589
- Yeah, that's your head.
- That's my...
743
00:35:53,591 --> 00:35:55,091
- How did you do that?
- I didn't.
744
00:35:55,093 --> 00:35:56,625
It's on the computer.
It's a video.
745
00:35:56,627 --> 00:35:59,226
- You can take that off, right?
- Off the computer?
746
00:35:59,228 --> 00:36:00,662
- Can't.
- Why?
747
00:36:00,664 --> 00:36:02,530
'Cause I'm not Steve Jobs,
that's why.
748
00:36:02,532 --> 00:36:04,131
Somebody's making money
off of that,
749
00:36:04,133 --> 00:36:06,033
and it ain't us,
I'll tell you that.
750
00:36:06,035 --> 00:36:08,502
I should charge you like
five bucks right now
751
00:36:08,504 --> 00:36:10,069
- just for watching that.
- Why me?
752
00:36:10,071 --> 00:36:12,238
You can't watch me
without my permission.
753
00:36:12,240 --> 00:36:14,539
- Who put that there?
- I don't know. It's a computer.
754
00:36:14,541 --> 00:36:16,108
- Can I tell you something?
- Yeah.
755
00:36:16,110 --> 00:36:18,176
The producer guy
is behind this, right?
756
00:36:18,178 --> 00:36:20,645
This is from the TV guy.
That's from the producer guy.
757
00:36:20,647 --> 00:36:22,114
What's his number?
Give me his number.
758
00:36:22,116 --> 00:36:24,116
- Who?
- The TV guy, come on,
759
00:36:24,118 --> 00:36:25,917
It's time for him
to hear from me.
760
00:36:25,919 --> 00:36:28,021
He's gotta hear
from Eddie Krumble now.
761
00:36:28,988 --> 00:36:31,390
Can I just watch it explode
one more time?
762
00:36:51,708 --> 00:36:55,442
I'm... I'm here to see
the producer guy
763
00:36:55,444 --> 00:36:57,146
for the TV shows, the TV.
764
00:36:57,979 --> 00:37:01,012
His name is Ralph Ratner.
765
00:37:01,014 --> 00:37:02,384
I'm here for a meeting.
766
00:37:03,284 --> 00:37:04,483
The TV guy, a meeting.
767
00:37:04,485 --> 00:37:05,420
Chris!
768
00:37:06,420 --> 00:37:07,652
Chris Plork!
769
00:37:07,654 --> 00:37:09,955
- Chris Plork, it's Raf.
- Hi.
770
00:37:09,957 --> 00:37:11,556
Ralph Ranter,
from The Stillerman Show,
771
00:37:11,558 --> 00:37:13,158
- We spoke on the phone.
- Yeah.
772
00:37:13,160 --> 00:37:15,559
Awesome, man.
Is he here with you?
773
00:37:15,561 --> 00:37:16,693
- No. The Clapper?
- Yeah.
774
00:37:16,695 --> 00:37:18,028
No, he's not here.
775
00:37:18,030 --> 00:37:19,296
He just gave me this letter,
776
00:37:19,298 --> 00:37:22,165
said deliver it
to Mr. Stillerman and go.
777
00:37:22,167 --> 00:37:24,033
- Wow.
- And that's what I want to do.
778
00:37:24,035 --> 00:37:25,400
Mr. Stillerman,
that's my boss.
779
00:37:25,402 --> 00:37:27,906
I can bring you to him now.
You want to come inside?
780
00:37:29,039 --> 00:37:30,271
- Yeah.
- All right,
781
00:37:30,273 --> 00:37:32,175
He's good.
We can let him in.
782
00:37:33,343 --> 00:37:35,308
Chris, listen to me.
783
00:37:35,310 --> 00:37:37,378
Now, if you don't mind,
obviously you don't,
784
00:37:37,380 --> 00:37:39,447
I'm gonna go take it to Jayme.
He's gonna check it out.
785
00:37:39,449 --> 00:37:42,551
In the meantime, I want you
just to hang here: green room.
786
00:37:43,117 --> 00:37:45,086
Help yourself
to whatever you like.
787
00:37:46,454 --> 00:37:48,090
- See you in a bit.
- Okay.
788
00:38:00,367 --> 00:38:01,435
No.
789
00:38:39,466 --> 00:38:41,599
Number one trending topic
on Twitter is
790
00:38:41,601 --> 00:38:43,134
"Who is The Clapper?"
791
00:38:43,136 --> 00:38:44,536
It's your call.
What do you think?
792
00:38:44,538 --> 00:38:46,637
I don't know. I don't know much
about the guy.
793
00:38:46,639 --> 00:38:48,571
What if he's dangerous?
794
00:38:48,573 --> 00:38:49,807
Right. That's a valid point.
795
00:38:49,809 --> 00:38:52,276
What if this guy,
he drops a secret word,
796
00:38:52,278 --> 00:38:53,742
he launches a terrorist cell?
797
00:38:53,744 --> 00:38:55,677
Then what? My kids are
going to public school.
798
00:38:55,679 --> 00:38:58,583
He's not a cell. He's presently
afraid to eat our sushi.
799
00:38:58,784 --> 00:38:59,716
Literally.
800
00:38:59,718 --> 00:39:01,417
He makes
a good point, J. Stills.
801
00:39:01,419 --> 00:39:04,319
What do you think?
Just say fuck it. Let's do it.
802
00:39:04,321 --> 00:39:07,320
- Fuck it, let's do it.
- Let's put him on. Tina?
803
00:39:07,322 --> 00:39:09,523
Ladies and gentlemen,
it is my pleasure
804
00:39:09,525 --> 00:39:14,162
to introduce you to our
very own insider, Chris Plork.
805
00:39:19,100 --> 00:39:21,467
No, no, no!
Just give him the letter and go.
806
00:39:21,469 --> 00:39:22,735
Doing great, turn around.
807
00:39:22,737 --> 00:39:24,373
Good to see you, Chris.
808
00:39:25,505 --> 00:39:27,108
Welcome, Chris.
809
00:39:27,808 --> 00:39:30,408
This is Sarah,
Victoria's Secret model.
810
00:39:30,410 --> 00:39:31,277
Hey, Sarah.
811
00:39:32,379 --> 00:39:33,377
You all may recognize Chris,
who we previously met
812
00:39:33,379 --> 00:39:35,311
on one of our
"Out on the Street" segments,
813
00:39:35,313 --> 00:39:37,416
So, Chris,
tell us why you're here.
814
00:39:39,617 --> 00:39:40,684
Those two guys.
815
00:39:40,686 --> 00:39:42,321
My producer Raf?
816
00:39:42,553 --> 00:39:44,152
Yeah. Those two guys told me
817
00:39:44,154 --> 00:39:45,554
to come sit this way.
818
00:39:45,556 --> 00:39:47,556
That'd be Raf, our producer,
and Cadwell.
819
00:39:47,558 --> 00:39:48,823
They told you the right thing,
820
00:39:48,825 --> 00:39:50,758
'cause this is
where it all happens.
821
00:39:50,760 --> 00:39:52,359
I don't think
I should be here.
822
00:39:52,361 --> 00:39:55,499
No, no, Chris, stop thinking.
You should be here.
823
00:39:56,132 --> 00:39:58,165
And I tell you that because
I need you to be confused
824
00:39:58,167 --> 00:40:00,436
when I tell you
these things.
825
00:40:01,170 --> 00:40:03,136
Now I understand you have
some sort of letter,
826
00:40:03,138 --> 00:40:06,175
a list of demands
from The Clapper?
827
00:40:06,841 --> 00:40:09,676
His demands?
I don't know.
828
00:40:09,678 --> 00:40:11,710
Well, let's read 'em.
829
00:40:11,712 --> 00:40:13,411
I don't think
I should read it.
830
00:40:13,413 --> 00:40:14,648
Yeah!
831
00:40:15,449 --> 00:40:16,648
Read it, yeah!
832
00:40:16,650 --> 00:40:18,448
I don't know
if I should read it.
833
00:40:18,450 --> 00:40:20,183
- I don't, I don't.
- I think you should read it.
834
00:40:20,185 --> 00:40:21,819
We all think
you should read it.
835
00:40:21,821 --> 00:40:23,321
Everybody at home thinks
you should read it.
836
00:40:23,323 --> 00:40:25,722
DJ Spider thinks
you should read it.
837
00:40:25,724 --> 00:40:27,791
- Whoo!
- Read it!
838
00:40:27,793 --> 00:40:30,496
- Yeah!
- Read it, yeah!
839
00:40:32,196 --> 00:40:34,497
Read it, read it!
840
00:40:34,499 --> 00:40:35,600
All right.
841
00:40:37,267 --> 00:40:39,467
"A message to Mr. Stiller-mer.
842
00:40:39,469 --> 00:40:41,336
I see that you have
found an interest
843
00:40:41,338 --> 00:40:43,338
in my clapping, I guess."
844
00:40:43,340 --> 00:40:44,738
I guess?
845
00:40:44,740 --> 00:40:46,639
Yeah, he wrote "I guess."
is right there.
846
00:40:46,641 --> 00:40:48,645
- He wrote I guess?
- Yeah, he...
847
00:40:49,511 --> 00:40:52,081
That's pretty funny of him,
I guess.
848
00:40:52,479 --> 00:40:55,747
"It also seems to me that you
would like to meet in person
849
00:40:55,749 --> 00:40:57,119
on your show.
850
00:40:58,186 --> 00:40:59,183
I do not know how much
your normally pay guests,
851
00:40:59,185 --> 00:41:01,886
however me and my friend
would be happy to appear
852
00:41:01,888 --> 00:41:03,490
for one million dollars."
853
00:41:03,757 --> 00:41:05,357
One million dollars?
854
00:41:05,359 --> 00:41:06,723
"Enclosed is proof
of who I am..."
855
00:41:06,725 --> 00:41:08,725
Wait. Hold the phone there
a second.
856
00:41:08,727 --> 00:41:10,794
- Did you say a million dollars?
- Yeah.
857
00:41:10,796 --> 00:41:12,328
Well, thank you
for the discount.
858
00:41:12,330 --> 00:41:13,730
I want to get paid that
as well.
859
00:41:13,732 --> 00:41:16,498
So do I. That's a lot of money.
Hold on a second.
860
00:41:16,500 --> 00:41:18,835
Can somebody pull up my next
guest on the monitor for me?
861
00:41:18,837 --> 00:41:20,502
Ladies and gentlemen,
Mark Cuban.
862
00:41:20,504 --> 00:41:22,203
What's up, Jayme?
863
00:41:22,205 --> 00:41:23,571
Mark, you're a billionaire.
Let me ask you a question.
864
00:41:23,573 --> 00:41:25,573
How much are we paying you
to be on the show?
865
00:41:25,575 --> 00:41:27,708
Not a damn thing, Jayme.
866
00:41:27,710 --> 00:41:30,677
Just this amazing spread
of food that's awesome.
867
00:41:30,679 --> 00:41:32,181
Thank you, Mark.
868
00:41:32,382 --> 00:41:34,383
- What?
- Are you out of your mind?
869
00:41:35,283 --> 00:41:38,753
Hmm? I mean, are you
out of your mind, man?
870
00:41:39,287 --> 00:41:41,653
It was so simple. All you had
to do was give him the note.
871
00:41:41,655 --> 00:41:42,755
That's it.
872
00:41:42,757 --> 00:41:44,825
Shark Tank.
I love that show.
873
00:41:45,525 --> 00:41:48,695
- They asked me to read it.
- Yeah, of course they did.
874
00:41:49,495 --> 00:41:51,498
That's how they do it.
They just...
875
00:41:53,399 --> 00:41:55,798
You weren't supposed
to go on TV, Chris.
876
00:41:55,800 --> 00:41:57,466
Now you're in it,
you realize that?
877
00:41:57,468 --> 00:41:59,535
You just got roped in
over the airwaves.
878
00:41:59,537 --> 00:42:02,404
That's probably a federal
offense or something.
879
00:42:02,406 --> 00:42:03,605
I don't know.
We could go to jail.
880
00:42:03,607 --> 00:42:06,308
- They thought it was funny.
- I don't know what's funny.
881
00:42:06,310 --> 00:42:08,944
We're broke.
How's that funny?
882
00:42:08,946 --> 00:42:11,946
- Funny.
- I gotta think about this.
883
00:42:11,948 --> 00:42:13,651
I gotta think.
I gotta...
884
00:42:13,950 --> 00:42:16,516
I gotta go home
and think about this.
885
00:42:16,518 --> 00:42:18,818
I gotta go home and think
about this, and that's it.
886
00:42:18,820 --> 00:42:21,757
We are getting closer
and closer to The Clapper.
887
00:42:22,424 --> 00:42:25,290
"If that is too much money
that we are asking for,
888
00:42:25,292 --> 00:42:27,827
please let us know
how much can happen.
889
00:42:27,829 --> 00:42:29,265
Thank you."
890
00:42:32,666 --> 00:42:35,300
Oh, wow, look at who it is.
891
00:42:35,302 --> 00:42:36,902
Mr. Movie Star, huh?
892
00:42:36,904 --> 00:42:38,935
Yeah, you piece of shit.
893
00:42:38,937 --> 00:42:40,437
Where are you going, buddy?
894
00:42:40,439 --> 00:42:42,772
Huh? You don't want to stay in
Hollywood?
895
00:42:42,774 --> 00:42:44,743
Hi. Where's your camera?
896
00:42:46,777 --> 00:42:49,579
Oh, Mr. Movie Star, huh?
897
00:42:49,581 --> 00:42:50,716
Okay.
898
00:42:51,748 --> 00:42:54,449
Hey, buddy, get out of here.
That's right, go.
899
00:42:54,451 --> 00:42:57,254
And don't bring your fucking
movie cameras here again.
900
00:42:57,788 --> 00:42:59,253
Haul ass.
901
00:42:59,255 --> 00:43:01,391
Judy! Judy!
902
00:43:02,791 --> 00:43:04,594
Eddie, you can't
let him see you.
903
00:43:05,262 --> 00:43:07,326
You can't let him
see you, Eddie.
904
00:43:07,328 --> 00:43:08,694
What? Who?
What are you talking about?
905
00:43:08,696 --> 00:43:11,498
Some people came by tonight,
asking questions.
906
00:43:11,500 --> 00:43:12,634
They had a photograph of you.
907
00:43:13,867 --> 00:43:15,568
They were blocking the pump.
Hercules was just going nuts.
908
00:43:15,570 --> 00:43:17,602
And they said they were
following you.
909
00:43:17,604 --> 00:43:18,537
Like following you.
910
00:43:18,539 --> 00:43:20,371
And then they had this guy
with a camera.
911
00:43:20,373 --> 00:43:22,907
- Yeah, yeah.
- Are you in trouble, Eddie?
912
00:43:22,909 --> 00:43:24,842
No, I'm not in trouble
exactly,
913
00:43:24,844 --> 00:43:26,612
but I mean, sort of.
914
00:43:27,312 --> 00:43:29,446
Remember the Stillerman thing
that I mentioned?
915
00:43:29,448 --> 00:43:32,752
They got it in for me somehow.
They're basically stalking me.
916
00:43:33,352 --> 00:43:34,550
- Stalking?
- Yeah.
917
00:43:34,552 --> 00:43:36,985
Mm-mm, no, Eddie, you didn't
say anything about stalking.
918
00:43:36,987 --> 00:43:38,487
I don't know about that,
919
00:43:38,489 --> 00:43:40,023
but Hercules knows
that we are friends,
920
00:43:40,025 --> 00:43:42,758
and we can't just have
the police show up.
921
00:43:42,760 --> 00:43:44,026
- Police?
- And that can't happen.
922
00:43:44,028 --> 00:43:45,426
It's just a TV guy.
923
00:43:45,428 --> 00:43:47,994
I like you, Eddie,
I really do,
924
00:43:47,996 --> 00:43:49,729
but I need my job,
925
00:43:49,731 --> 00:43:52,599
and I know it's a stupid,
stupid, stupid job,
926
00:43:52,601 --> 00:43:54,668
but I need it,
and you know that.
927
00:43:54,670 --> 00:43:56,935
- Of course I know that.
- It's stupid, I know.
928
00:43:56,937 --> 00:43:59,906
Yes, it's fine,
but I need the job, Eddie.
929
00:43:59,908 --> 00:44:01,408
And you know
that I need the job.
930
00:44:01,410 --> 00:44:04,376
- I get it.
- But is it about your shows?
931
00:44:04,378 --> 00:44:06,044
I don't understand.
I mean, shit!
932
00:44:06,046 --> 00:44:08,046
- It's just a...
- Thing with the Growing Pains,
933
00:44:08,048 --> 00:44:09,980
and you were with a TV star
or something?
934
00:44:09,982 --> 00:44:11,815
- Alan Thicke.
- Is that what it is?
935
00:44:11,817 --> 00:44:13,317
It's not funny, Eddie.
936
00:44:13,319 --> 00:44:15,420
- This isn't funny.
- No, I know. It's not funny.
937
00:44:15,422 --> 00:44:17,053
I'm not saying it's funny.
938
00:44:17,055 --> 00:44:19,455
I'm sorry.
I should've told you before.
939
00:44:19,457 --> 00:44:20,526
What?
940
00:44:21,492 --> 00:44:23,327
- It's embarrassing.
- What's embarrassing?
941
00:44:23,795 --> 00:44:25,061
The thing.
I don't know.
942
00:44:25,063 --> 00:44:27,730
- What?
- Well, how do I explain it?
943
00:44:27,732 --> 00:44:30,432
- It's like a...
- I have to go to work.
944
00:44:30,434 --> 00:44:32,066
- I'm going to work now.
- This is coming out all wrong.
945
00:44:32,068 --> 00:44:33,603
No. Yes, I am!
946
00:44:35,805 --> 00:44:37,040
I'm gonna fix it!
947
00:44:37,605 --> 00:44:41,310
I'm gonna fix it, Judy.
I'm so sorry.
948
00:44:42,911 --> 00:44:44,546
Chris, wake up.
949
00:44:44,778 --> 00:44:46,314
Come on.
950
00:44:46,948 --> 00:44:48,384
Chris.
951
00:44:48,850 --> 00:44:51,016
Chris, come on, wake up, man.
952
00:44:51,018 --> 00:44:52,286
Wake up.
953
00:44:53,288 --> 00:44:55,322
I need that producer's number.
What's his name?
954
00:44:55,855 --> 00:44:57,524
Ratso or something?
955
00:44:57,724 --> 00:44:59,292
Right? Come on!
956
00:45:03,096 --> 00:45:04,698
Hi. Um...
957
00:45:06,063 --> 00:45:07,097
You got singles?
958
00:45:07,099 --> 00:45:08,334
Sure.
959
00:45:08,566 --> 00:45:10,902
It's for the computer,
you know.
960
00:45:14,004 --> 00:45:15,573
There ya go.
961
00:45:15,839 --> 00:45:17,608
The computer's, uh...
962
00:45:18,042 --> 00:45:19,809
It's got a search thing on it?
963
00:45:20,410 --> 00:45:22,846
Yeah, we just had
a search thing installed on 'em.
964
00:46:22,729 --> 00:46:23,564
Ma.
965
00:46:24,631 --> 00:46:25,331
Eddie Krumble,
this is Jonathan Cadwell
966
00:46:25,333 --> 00:46:26,601
from The Stillerman Show.
967
00:46:27,834 --> 00:46:28,466
And believe me when I tell you
we know who you are.
968
00:46:28,468 --> 00:46:29,667
You are The Clapper.
969
00:46:29,669 --> 00:46:32,103
You moved here in 2008.
You have a girlfriend
970
00:46:32,105 --> 00:46:33,703
that works at
the Mobil station.
971
00:46:33,705 --> 00:46:35,639
You have several
unresolved fix-it tickets
972
00:46:35,641 --> 00:46:38,008
and a warrant for
an unpaid littering ticket
973
00:46:38,010 --> 00:46:39,843
dating back nearly a decade.
974
00:46:39,845 --> 00:46:40,743
Shall I go on?
975
00:46:40,745 --> 00:46:42,948
Listen, man,
how'd you get this number?
976
00:46:43,815 --> 00:46:45,547
Eddie, this is Raf Ranter.
977
00:46:45,549 --> 00:46:47,215
Look, we're not interested
in what you do
978
00:46:47,217 --> 00:46:48,550
legally or illegally.
979
00:46:48,552 --> 00:46:49,755
We're just interested in you.
980
00:46:51,088 --> 00:46:52,354
You're the biggest
thing since Stupid Pet Tricks.
981
00:46:52,356 --> 00:46:55,158
Yeah? Save the compliments for
somebody who's looking for some.
982
00:46:55,992 --> 00:46:58,891
And I'm not comfortable
with this being on television
983
00:46:58,893 --> 00:47:00,527
unless I'm getting paid.
984
00:47:00,529 --> 00:47:02,463
You hear me? Paid.
985
00:47:02,465 --> 00:47:03,666
Eddie, just keep this
between you and me.
986
00:47:04,065 --> 00:47:06,131
There's a driver waiting
outside your apartment.
987
00:47:06,133 --> 00:47:07,935
- What?
- Yeah.
988
00:47:09,970 --> 00:47:12,204
He's been instructed to take
you to the Hilton in Burbank,
989
00:47:12,206 --> 00:47:13,472
where you have a suite
waiting for you,
990
00:47:13,474 --> 00:47:16,677
for an all-expenses paid
little vacation, all right?
991
00:47:20,879 --> 00:47:22,111
And it's free, okay?
992
00:47:22,113 --> 00:47:24,147
Your buddy Chris
is super-pumped.
993
00:47:24,149 --> 00:47:26,682
- Chris?
- We just got off the phone.
994
00:47:26,684 --> 00:47:29,117
He gave us your number.
I hope that's okay with you.
995
00:47:29,119 --> 00:47:31,956
And tonight is the night
we want you to be on the show.
996
00:47:32,723 --> 00:47:36,158
Okay, so you're cool to pay?
How much are we talking about?
997
00:47:36,160 --> 00:47:37,426
We have
a very strict policy.
998
00:47:37,428 --> 00:47:40,528
We do not and cannot pay
our guests to appear, but...
999
00:47:40,530 --> 00:47:42,963
But the exposure can
lead to a lot of things.
1000
00:47:42,965 --> 00:47:44,131
A lot of great things.
1001
00:47:44,133 --> 00:47:47,867
Exposure?
1002
00:47:47,869 --> 00:47:50,971
I can't pay phone bills
with exposure, you know?
1003
00:47:50,973 --> 00:47:53,671
You cost me my job,
my friend Chris's job.
1004
00:47:53,673 --> 00:47:57,878
Why can't you just lay off
and stop harassing my girl?
1005
00:48:18,530 --> 00:48:21,099
He said they pay people
with home appliances.
1006
00:48:21,599 --> 00:48:22,998
These people,
they're so cheap.
1007
00:48:23,000 --> 00:48:24,899
You realize they get
that stuff for free, Chris?
1008
00:48:24,901 --> 00:48:28,236
It's like on one of our shows
when they give us, you know,
1009
00:48:28,238 --> 00:48:29,736
the book the guy's promoting
1010
00:48:29,738 --> 00:48:31,771
or the window cleaner
or whatever.
1011
00:48:31,773 --> 00:48:35,110
You gotta stop answering the
phone when they call, please.
1012
00:48:35,710 --> 00:48:37,743
Can you do that? Just don't
answer the phone when they call,
1013
00:48:37,745 --> 00:48:39,312
unless they're gonna pay us,
1014
00:48:39,314 --> 00:48:41,013
and then it's a different
conversation,
1015
00:48:41,015 --> 00:48:42,881
but like up till now...
1016
00:48:42,883 --> 00:48:45,550
I don't think they can pay
people to be on their show.
1017
00:48:45,552 --> 00:48:47,753
He tried laying that one me too.
I'm not buying it.
1018
00:48:47,755 --> 00:48:51,158
They're making like
a million bucks a day, easy.
1019
00:48:51,857 --> 00:48:54,692
Well, they pay people
by promoting them.
1020
00:48:54,694 --> 00:48:56,661
The only thing they're promoting
is me being an idiot,
1021
00:48:56,663 --> 00:48:57,897
and I don't want that,
all right?
1022
00:48:59,097 --> 00:49:02,901
Up till now, it's just been
bad news, all right, Chris?
1023
00:49:10,808 --> 00:49:11,876
Where's Judy?
1024
00:49:12,575 --> 00:49:14,544
Sorry, sir,
Judy's been replaced.
1025
00:49:14,944 --> 00:49:17,714
Who are you? What's...
What are you talking about?
1026
00:49:17,913 --> 00:49:20,614
She was causing some type of
commotion with a bunch of people
1027
00:49:20,616 --> 00:49:22,215
that kept coming back
with cameras,
1028
00:49:22,217 --> 00:49:23,816
blocking the pumps
or something.
1029
00:49:23,818 --> 00:49:25,317
Mr. Hercules, the boss,
he didn't like that.
1030
00:49:25,319 --> 00:49:27,652
- Fired her on the spot.
- Are you kidding me?
1031
00:49:27,654 --> 00:49:29,254
Do you have any idea
where she is?
1032
00:49:29,256 --> 00:49:30,823
Uh, home, probably. Home.
1033
00:49:30,825 --> 00:49:32,222
Probably looking
for another job
1034
00:49:32,224 --> 00:49:33,657
'cause she's unemployed
right now.
1035
00:49:33,659 --> 00:49:35,159
Is she gonna be by later
or something?
1036
00:49:35,161 --> 00:49:36,660
What are you talking about?
1037
00:49:36,662 --> 00:49:38,896
No, no, she's definitely
been let go.
1038
00:49:38,898 --> 00:49:41,699
- She's not coming back.
- Do you have her number?
1039
00:49:41,701 --> 00:49:44,167
Nah, that would be
privileged information.
1040
00:49:44,169 --> 00:49:48,303
No way! You're that guy.
That guy from TV, The Clapper.
1041
00:49:48,305 --> 00:49:49,872
- No, that's not me.
- Hey, baby!
1042
00:49:49,874 --> 00:49:51,707
It's that guy
from The Stillerman Show!
1043
00:49:51,709 --> 00:49:53,040
- I'm just looking for Judy.
- Naw, you're him.
1044
00:49:53,042 --> 00:49:55,076
I seen you on the show
last night on the TV.
1045
00:49:55,078 --> 00:49:57,378
I knew I recognized him.
Can I take a picture?
1046
00:49:57,380 --> 00:49:59,848
I knew I recognized you.
You're The Clapper.
1047
00:49:59,850 --> 00:50:01,381
- You're so funny, man.
- It's not me.
1048
00:50:01,383 --> 00:50:02,917
- He's phenomenal.
- Not me.
1049
00:50:02,919 --> 00:50:04,852
- Yeah, you're The Clapper.
- Okay, no.
1050
00:50:04,854 --> 00:50:06,287
Can I take a picture
for the booth, please?
1051
00:50:06,289 --> 00:50:08,320
- No, no, no.
- Just one picture.
1052
00:50:08,322 --> 00:50:09,688
- No big deal.
- Come on.
1053
00:50:09,690 --> 00:50:10,889
Don't be that guy!
1054
00:50:10,891 --> 00:50:12,324
You're being that guy
right now.
1055
00:50:12,326 --> 00:50:14,094
There ya go.
It's The Clapper!
1056
00:50:26,972 --> 00:50:28,372
What you're
talking about here
1057
00:50:28,374 --> 00:50:31,174
is almost an acre of property
1058
00:50:31,176 --> 00:50:32,908
for pennies on the dollar.
1059
00:50:32,910 --> 00:50:34,977
Pennies on the dollar!
1060
00:50:34,979 --> 00:50:38,713
Pennies on the dollar!
Pennies on the dollar!
1061
00:50:38,715 --> 00:50:42,017
And at Tranquil Estates,
there are seven lakes
1062
00:50:42,019 --> 00:50:43,817
bustling with catfish,
1063
00:50:43,819 --> 00:50:47,087
thirteen playgrounds,
and three golf courses.
1064
00:50:47,089 --> 00:50:49,024
Now that's the good news.
The bad news,
1065
00:50:49,026 --> 00:50:50,356
full disclosure here,
1066
00:50:50,358 --> 00:50:52,693
they're also planning
an entire slew
1067
00:50:52,695 --> 00:50:55,195
of retail outlet stores,
1068
00:50:55,197 --> 00:50:57,165
and each one of them...
1069
00:52:18,034 --> 00:52:22,305
Lumber Liquidators.
Hardwood floors for life.
1070
00:52:22,905 --> 00:52:25,071
Hi, folks, you know,
you can spend a fortune
1071
00:52:25,073 --> 00:52:27,475
and wait a lifetime
for your favorite artist
1072
00:52:27,477 --> 00:52:29,942
to come to your town
on a promotional tour,
1073
00:52:29,944 --> 00:52:32,344
or you can let us
do it for you.
1074
00:52:32,346 --> 00:52:34,447
Here's Brian Wilson, live,
1075
00:52:34,449 --> 00:52:36,915
promoting his new CD
of greatest hits,
1076
00:52:36,917 --> 00:52:40,088
singing one of my favorites,
"Love and Mercy."
1077
00:52:48,993 --> 00:52:52,228
♪ I was sittin'
In a crummy movie ♪
1078
00:52:52,230 --> 00:52:56,164
♪ With my hands on my chin ♪
1079
00:52:56,166 --> 00:52:57,999
Thank you.
1080
00:52:58,001 --> 00:53:01,369
♪ All the violence
That occurs ♪
1081
00:53:01,371 --> 00:53:04,941
♪ Seems like we never win ♪
1082
00:53:07,877 --> 00:53:09,543
♪ Love and mercy ♪
1083
00:53:09,545 --> 00:53:14,117
♪ That's what you need
Tonight ♪
1084
00:53:15,416 --> 00:53:18,884
♪ Love and mercy tonight ♪
1085
00:53:18,886 --> 00:53:20,953
Yes, yes,
you gotta love it.
1086
00:53:20,955 --> 00:53:23,322
Hey, when you really want
to reach out to people,
1087
00:53:23,324 --> 00:53:27,228
what better way than
right here on TV, isn't it?
1088
00:53:36,402 --> 00:53:39,502
Hey, Chris.
How ya doing?
1089
00:53:39,504 --> 00:53:42,939
- You must be...
- Yeah, no, I'm Eddie, right?
1090
00:53:42,941 --> 00:53:44,540
The Clapper or whatever.
1091
00:53:44,542 --> 00:53:46,141
And it's great
to finally meet you.
1092
00:53:46,143 --> 00:53:48,510
We've spoken already.
This is Jonathan Cadwell.
1093
00:53:48,512 --> 00:53:50,211
- He's our showrunner.
- How ya doing?
1094
00:53:50,213 --> 00:53:52,547
He's gonna quickly brief you
on a couple of the briefings.
1095
00:53:52,549 --> 00:53:54,852
Good stuff. Mr. Krumble,
just so we're clear,
1096
00:53:55,250 --> 00:53:57,884
you understand there'll be no
monetary compensation for this.
1097
00:53:57,886 --> 00:53:59,985
- Correct?
- But we have excellent prizes.
1098
00:53:59,987 --> 00:54:01,421
- We do.
- And goodie bags.
1099
00:54:01,423 --> 00:54:02,555
Who doesn't want
a new yoga ball?
1100
00:54:02,557 --> 00:54:04,427
- Am I right?
- It's all good, man.
1101
00:54:05,092 --> 00:54:07,192
I'm just here to promote, right?
1102
00:54:07,194 --> 00:54:10,129
That's the thing. I'm gonna
promote looking for Judy.
1103
00:54:10,131 --> 00:54:13,030
Of course, absolutely.
Chris got me up to speed.
1104
00:54:13,032 --> 00:54:16,035
We have her information.
Judy from the gas station.
1105
00:54:16,468 --> 00:54:19,470
She worked at a gas station.
She's not from a gas station.
1106
00:54:19,472 --> 00:54:23,840
I'll make a note. I'm gonna
log it away up here. Good stuff.
1107
00:54:23,842 --> 00:54:25,509
If there's any funny business,
we're outta here.
1108
00:54:25,511 --> 00:54:27,175
- No funny business.
- Eddie-cakes,
1109
00:54:27,177 --> 00:54:28,510
I'm offended
you'd even think that.
1110
00:54:28,512 --> 00:54:30,348
- What?
- Eddie Crumpets?
1111
00:54:30,914 --> 00:54:32,448
- No.
- Crumblecakes.
1112
00:54:32,450 --> 00:54:34,282
He don't really eat
cake like that.
1113
00:54:34,284 --> 00:54:35,353
Nothing with cake, right?
1114
00:54:36,587 --> 00:54:38,052
Eddie, we're here to find Judy.
That's what we're gonna do.
1115
00:54:38,054 --> 00:54:39,587
We good?
You guys feel good?
1116
00:54:39,589 --> 00:54:41,120
- Yeah.
- Let's find Judy.
1117
00:54:41,122 --> 00:54:44,290
Gentlemen, this is
Dr. Rogers Hay.
1118
00:54:44,292 --> 00:54:45,626
He's another guest
on the show tonight.
1119
00:54:45,628 --> 00:54:47,430
Please make yourselves
comfortable.
1120
00:54:47,997 --> 00:54:50,096
Hey, hey, Dr. Hay,
loved your book.
1121
00:54:50,098 --> 00:54:52,097
Well, my assistant did,
you know, so...
1122
00:54:52,099 --> 00:54:54,032
This might be the first book
I read in 10 years.
1123
00:54:54,034 --> 00:54:55,500
You're the total package, buddy,
1124
00:54:55,502 --> 00:54:57,468
and you know which one
I'm talking about.
1125
00:54:57,470 --> 00:54:59,037
We'll be right back.
1126
00:54:59,039 --> 00:55:01,075
Can I just say,
I don't really trust that guy.
1127
00:55:01,441 --> 00:55:04,175
You know, I feel like Charlie
Brown with Peppermint Patty,
1128
00:55:04,177 --> 00:55:05,179
like the football?
1129
00:55:06,280 --> 00:55:08,081
I think the character
you're referring to is Lucy.
1130
00:55:09,480 --> 00:55:10,946
- What?
- You know her?
1131
00:55:10,948 --> 00:55:13,616
No, I don't,
but I do know the cartoon,
1132
00:55:13,618 --> 00:55:18,119
and I think, Eddie...
your name is Eddie, yes?
1133
00:55:18,121 --> 00:55:19,153
Yeah.
1134
00:55:19,155 --> 00:55:20,956
That Stillerman
and all of them
1135
00:55:20,958 --> 00:55:23,290
are trying to control
your destiny.
1136
00:55:23,292 --> 00:55:24,995
Would you agree with me?
1137
00:55:25,395 --> 00:55:26,995
You're that guru guy.
1138
00:55:26,997 --> 00:55:30,963
The voice and the eyes.
I got it. I just placed it.
1139
00:55:30,965 --> 00:55:33,399
Remember? We did one of
your shows a while back.
1140
00:55:33,401 --> 00:55:35,334
We walked on like hot coals,
but they weren't.
1141
00:55:35,336 --> 00:55:38,904
- It wasn't hot.
- Of course they weren't hot.
1142
00:55:38,906 --> 00:55:41,107
No, because it was
all about your courage
1143
00:55:41,109 --> 00:55:43,509
to do something
of which you were afraid,
1144
00:55:43,511 --> 00:55:45,243
to show that
you were in charge,
1145
00:55:45,245 --> 00:55:49,613
that you had faith that
we would not burn your feet.
1146
00:55:49,615 --> 00:55:51,981
Yeah, that and we got paid
50 bucks.
1147
00:55:51,983 --> 00:55:54,318
- 75.
- Even if we paid you $100,
1148
00:55:54,320 --> 00:55:56,587
you wouldn't have burned
your feet, now, would you have?
1149
00:55:56,589 --> 00:55:58,090
Wait, how much?
1150
00:55:59,390 --> 00:56:03,158
Either way, you've gotta
take control of your life.
1151
00:56:03,160 --> 00:56:05,661
When people try to sway you
away from what you want,
1152
00:56:05,663 --> 00:56:07,695
you've got to
reel them back in.
1153
00:56:07,697 --> 00:56:09,533
You've got to reel them
back in.
1154
00:56:10,034 --> 00:56:11,566
Reel them in, Eddie.
1155
00:56:11,568 --> 00:56:15,405
Take control of your destiny.
1156
00:56:16,406 --> 00:56:18,138
Can I...
I'm sorry to interrupt.
1157
00:56:18,140 --> 00:56:20,541
I'm like super uncomfortable
right now.
1158
00:56:21,642 --> 00:56:24,077
Now, ladies and gentlemen,
without any further ado,
1159
00:56:24,079 --> 00:56:25,679
may I please introduce to you,
1160
00:56:25,681 --> 00:56:27,612
after much hard detective work,
1161
00:56:27,614 --> 00:56:29,614
everyone's favorite
audience member,
1162
00:56:29,616 --> 00:56:32,152
Eddie Krumble, The Clapper!
1163
00:56:38,992 --> 00:56:42,125
Thank you, Eddie, please.
1164
00:56:42,127 --> 00:56:43,293
Oh, man!
1165
00:56:43,295 --> 00:56:45,728
I gotta tell you,
it's a real pleasure
1166
00:56:45,730 --> 00:56:48,064
finally meeting the man
behind the, uh,
1167
00:56:48,066 --> 00:56:49,731
the clapping, I guess.
1168
00:56:49,733 --> 00:56:51,233
Yeah, sure.
1169
00:56:51,235 --> 00:56:53,301
Okay, Eddie Krumble,
you're a clapper?
1170
00:56:53,303 --> 00:56:54,303
Yeah.
1171
00:56:54,305 --> 00:56:57,304
Tell us how this works.
So you get paid to clap?
1172
00:56:57,306 --> 00:57:00,574
- Yeah, and laugh sometimes.
- When things aren't funny.
1173
00:57:00,576 --> 00:57:03,042
Sure, yeah, like when
they're supposed to be funny,
1174
00:57:03,044 --> 00:57:04,211
but they're not?
1175
00:57:04,213 --> 00:57:05,312
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
1176
00:57:05,314 --> 00:57:07,348
- You're preaching to the choir.
- Yeah.
1177
00:57:07,350 --> 00:57:09,684
The Chris cam,
ladies and gentlemen.
1178
00:57:12,487 --> 00:57:16,020
There he is, right there.
Does he know you're doing that?
1179
00:57:16,022 --> 00:57:17,622
- Does he know you're filming?
- Absolutely not.
1180
00:57:17,624 --> 00:57:19,459
That's what makes it so great.
1181
00:57:19,692 --> 00:57:21,625
- Hmm.
- So anyway,
1182
00:57:21,627 --> 00:57:22,760
somewhere along the way,
1183
00:57:22,762 --> 00:57:24,932
you sent your friend Chris
in here
1184
00:57:25,097 --> 00:57:28,064
uh, with a self-ransom note
1185
00:57:28,066 --> 00:57:33,469
to collect a million-dollar
bounty on you, funny enough,
1186
00:57:33,471 --> 00:57:34,940
is that right?
1187
00:57:35,272 --> 00:57:37,238
Well, we tried
calling your producer guy,
1188
00:57:37,240 --> 00:57:39,474
and he said that you didn't
pay anybody to come on the show,
1189
00:57:39,476 --> 00:57:42,744
so they offered us like
a toaster or something, right?
1190
00:57:42,746 --> 00:57:45,446
- It's a nice toaster.
- I mean, what is that?
1191
00:57:45,448 --> 00:57:47,482
What do you give the big stars
that come on here,
1192
00:57:47,484 --> 00:57:50,485
like Van Damme or somebody?
He's not gonna take a toaster.
1193
00:57:50,487 --> 00:57:52,452
I gotta be honest with you.
Nowadays I think Van Damme
1194
00:57:52,454 --> 00:57:55,425
would be happy with
a pizza pocket, huh?
1195
00:57:57,291 --> 00:58:00,160
But guess what. You're here,
and that's all that matters.
1196
00:58:01,763 --> 00:58:06,164
Yeah, all right, yeah,
so, you know, I...
1197
00:58:06,166 --> 00:58:08,232
Your guy said that people
come on here to promote things,
1198
00:58:08,234 --> 00:58:09,633
but I didn't have
anything to promote,
1199
00:58:09,635 --> 00:58:11,236
so I thought maybe
I could come on the show
1200
00:58:11,238 --> 00:58:13,237
and promote trying
to find Judy.
1201
00:58:13,239 --> 00:58:16,739
That's... Yeah.
'Cause of the promoting thing
1202
00:58:16,741 --> 00:58:21,045
Look at your boy.
1203
00:58:21,779 --> 00:58:25,281
Look at him.
He's all comfortable, legs up.
1204
00:58:25,283 --> 00:58:27,516
He's reading that book
1205
00:58:27,518 --> 00:58:31,787
He's reading a book.
What are you laughing at?
1206
00:58:31,789 --> 00:58:34,257
- Clap for us, Clapper!
- Yeah!
1207
00:58:35,524 --> 00:58:37,158
You see what I'm saying?
1208
00:58:37,160 --> 00:58:39,060
That's what I'm talking about.
Like what is that?
1209
00:58:39,062 --> 00:58:41,162
You wanted to clap?
What is that for?
1210
00:58:42,697 --> 00:58:44,697
How is that funny
or interesting?
1211
00:58:44,699 --> 00:58:47,268
Like this? What is that?
I don't get it.
1212
00:58:51,237 --> 00:58:54,104
Man, Eddie, take a deep breath,
all right?
1213
00:58:54,106 --> 00:58:55,705
You wanna make a big joke
out of me, go ahead.
1214
00:58:55,707 --> 00:58:59,410
That's fine. The only reason
I came here is 'cause I thought
1215
00:58:59,412 --> 00:59:01,411
is it's the only way
I could find her, right?
1216
00:59:01,413 --> 00:59:03,313
I thought maybe somebody
out there might know her
1217
00:59:03,315 --> 00:59:05,315
or can just
talk to her and tell her
1218
00:59:05,317 --> 00:59:09,385
that I just want to see her and
talk to her and sort things out.
1219
00:59:09,387 --> 00:59:10,819
- That's it, right?
- Awww!
1220
00:59:10,821 --> 00:59:14,392
Yeah, awww!
Save the sympathy, all right?
1221
00:59:14,792 --> 00:59:18,295
That's what I'm here for,
just to promote finding her.
1222
00:59:20,429 --> 00:59:23,096
Do you have a picture?
Maybe a description,
1223
00:59:23,098 --> 00:59:24,864
an artist's rendition,
a caricature, something?
1224
00:59:24,866 --> 00:59:28,037
We'll use, uh...
1225
00:59:28,703 --> 00:59:30,538
Well, yeah,
I mean, she's like...
1226
00:59:31,572 --> 00:59:33,206
She's beautiful, right?
1227
00:59:33,208 --> 00:59:36,140
She's got this like
kinda blond mousy thing
1228
00:59:36,142 --> 00:59:39,176
going on with her hair,
but beautiful.
1229
00:59:39,178 --> 00:59:42,383
And not in like a normal
beautiful way,
1230
00:59:42,883 --> 00:59:46,353
but beautiful, beautiful.
1231
00:59:46,619 --> 00:59:48,055
Aww.
1232
00:59:48,454 --> 00:59:51,190
Kinda like a cute emoji,
I'm picturing, you know?
1233
00:59:51,355 --> 00:59:53,188
But I think we're starting
to get you, Eddie.
1234
00:59:53,190 --> 00:59:55,357
So here's what we do now, guys.
Her name is Judy.
1235
00:59:55,359 --> 00:59:57,492
She has mousy hair
that's kind of beautiful,
1236
00:59:57,494 --> 00:59:59,561
but not normal kind
of beautiful, right?
1237
00:59:59,563 --> 01:00:02,430
And she was recently fired
from a gas station,
1238
01:00:02,432 --> 01:00:04,598
and we need you
to help us find her
1239
01:00:04,600 --> 01:00:08,869
because we will reunite
Eddie Krumble and Judy
1240
01:00:08,871 --> 01:00:10,770
right here on this show!
1241
01:00:10,772 --> 01:00:12,841
DJ Spider, play us out.
1242
01:00:14,709 --> 01:00:16,776
- You guys crushed it.
- Yes!
1243
01:00:16,778 --> 01:00:19,512
And we were wondering if you
would be willing to go out,
1244
01:00:19,514 --> 01:00:20,382
with pay, of course,
1245
01:00:21,750 --> 01:00:22,748
for one of our Stillerman
On The Street segments.
1246
01:00:22,750 --> 01:00:23,683
It was nice of you guys
to have us on the show,
1247
01:00:23,685 --> 01:00:28,386
but you'll let us know
if anybody calls.
1248
01:00:28,388 --> 01:00:30,354
- What?
- How much you paying?
1249
01:00:30,356 --> 01:00:32,889
We understand the situation
you guys are in financially,
1250
01:00:32,891 --> 01:00:34,624
both of you, and...
1251
01:00:34,626 --> 01:00:36,460
we're willing to do
whatever we can to help.
1252
01:00:36,462 --> 01:00:38,528
We're talking a monster payday
here for you, okay?
1253
01:00:38,530 --> 01:00:42,198
We are prepared to give you
$5,000 per appearance,
1254
01:00:42,200 --> 01:00:44,933
with a minimum guarantee
of five appearances.
1255
01:00:44,935 --> 01:00:46,301
All we're asking of you
1256
01:00:46,303 --> 01:00:48,306
is exactly what
you came to us for.
1257
01:00:48,604 --> 01:00:50,238
Help us all find Judy.
1258
01:00:50,240 --> 01:00:52,240
Oh, you ain't gotta do
no convincing here.
1259
01:00:52,242 --> 01:00:55,545
That's great.
Eddie, are you in?
1260
01:00:56,913 --> 01:00:59,416
That's it.
No other stuff like... Yeah?
1261
01:00:59,649 --> 01:01:00,646
- No.
- No.
1262
01:01:00,648 --> 01:01:02,381
Uh, yeah, yeah.
1263
01:01:02,383 --> 01:01:04,850
I mean, if that's all
we're doing, no other stuff.
1264
01:01:04,852 --> 01:01:06,519
You know what?
Okay, all right.
1265
01:01:06,521 --> 01:01:09,388
- Oh, that is great.
- Sound like we got a deal.
1266
01:01:09,390 --> 01:01:11,692
- Tina, get us some contracts.
- Guys, I love your faces.
1267
01:01:12,292 --> 01:01:15,595
Tina! Ohh!
Where the fuck are you?
1268
01:01:17,430 --> 01:01:20,463
- And action!
- Hi, I'm Eddie Krumble.
1269
01:01:20,465 --> 01:01:22,632
I'm here at the gas station
where Judy used to work.
1270
01:01:22,634 --> 01:01:25,235
She doesn't work here anymore
'cause she got fired.
1271
01:01:25,237 --> 01:01:27,369
Off to the side, tip it.
Let's see the Chyron.
1272
01:01:27,371 --> 01:01:29,837
Um, wait, can I do it again?
1273
01:01:29,839 --> 01:01:31,209
Don't look at me.
Look at the camera.
1274
01:01:31,408 --> 01:01:32,707
You're lookin' at me.
Don't look at me.
1275
01:01:32,709 --> 01:01:34,209
I know I'm talking to you,
but don't look at me.
1276
01:01:34,211 --> 01:01:35,410
Don't look at me.
Look at the camera.
1277
01:01:35,412 --> 01:01:36,846
You're looking at me again.
1278
01:01:39,516 --> 01:01:40,981
Go talk to that attendant,
ask about Judy,
1279
01:01:40,983 --> 01:01:42,616
where she is,
all that kind of stuff.
1280
01:01:42,618 --> 01:01:43,683
- That guy?
- Yes.
1281
01:01:43,685 --> 01:01:44,917
I'm not talking to that guy.
1282
01:01:44,919 --> 01:01:47,354
Anyone who blocks my pumps
is dead forever.
1283
01:01:47,356 --> 01:01:48,988
You can hit a strip club
in about 10 minutes.
1284
01:01:48,990 --> 01:01:50,188
We're gonna be completely
out of your hair.
1285
01:01:50,190 --> 01:01:52,724
I got a picture of your mother
right here by Dairy Queen.
1286
01:01:52,726 --> 01:01:55,394
Yeah, I'm sure you got a
yellow Mercedes Benz.
1287
01:01:55,396 --> 01:01:57,696
- That's wonderful, sir.
- I can sit here and jack off.
1288
01:01:57,698 --> 01:01:59,533
No, don't put that out there.
1289
01:02:01,634 --> 01:02:03,301
I want to make love
to everybody here.
1290
01:02:03,303 --> 01:02:05,602
Not you, sir.
You disgust me.
1291
01:02:05,604 --> 01:02:07,972
This is Eddie and Chris
for The Stillerman Show.
1292
01:02:07,974 --> 01:02:09,706
Have you seen Judy?
1293
01:02:09,708 --> 01:02:12,408
Yes, I saw a Judy.
1294
01:02:12,410 --> 01:02:14,712
Excuse me, Homo sapiens skull,
have you seen Judy?
1295
01:02:15,714 --> 01:02:17,315
I'm gonna take that as a no.
1296
01:02:21,751 --> 01:02:24,421
Who's the baddest motherfuckers
in late night?
1297
01:02:25,554 --> 01:02:27,755
All right, guys, listen,
you're gonna kill out there.
1298
01:02:27,757 --> 01:02:30,424
I love you, I love your faces,
I love your bodies, go win.
1299
01:02:30,426 --> 01:02:31,594
Whoo!
1300
01:02:35,396 --> 01:02:37,263
Okay, don't hurt yourself.
1301
01:02:37,265 --> 01:02:38,698
Sir, I love your style.
1302
01:02:38,700 --> 01:02:41,733
Maybe you can come on over
and join us?
1303
01:02:41,735 --> 01:02:44,335
We'll have a quick conversation
in front of the camera.
1304
01:02:44,337 --> 01:02:46,004
Hold on, hold on, sir,
this way.
1305
01:02:46,006 --> 01:02:48,272
Let's have a quick,
calm conversation
1306
01:02:48,274 --> 01:02:49,642
in front of the camera.
1307
01:02:53,911 --> 01:02:55,547
Yeah?
1308
01:02:57,683 --> 01:02:58,751
Hi. Louise?
1309
01:02:59,018 --> 01:03:01,651
Sorry to bother you.
Are you...
1310
01:03:01,653 --> 01:03:05,654
Do you do the castings
for the shows' audiences?
1311
01:03:05,656 --> 01:03:07,055
'Cause I'm a friend
of Eddie Krumble.
1312
01:03:07,057 --> 01:03:08,555
Oh, you're a friend.
1313
01:03:08,557 --> 01:03:10,325
I know that he used
to work here at least.
1314
01:03:10,327 --> 01:03:11,325
That's what he told me.
1315
01:03:11,327 --> 01:03:13,431
Okay, is this the idiot
you're talking about?
1316
01:03:13,863 --> 01:03:15,895
Hi, I'm Eddie Krumble.
I'm here at the gas station
1317
01:03:15,897 --> 01:03:17,063
where Judy used to work.
1318
01:03:17,065 --> 01:03:18,899
She doesn't work here anymore.
1319
01:03:18,901 --> 01:03:20,770
- She got fired.
- Oh, my God.
1320
01:03:22,003 --> 01:03:23,439
Um...
1321
01:03:23,938 --> 01:03:25,673
Sorry, yeah.
1322
01:03:27,441 --> 01:03:28,643
Thanks.
1323
01:03:31,745 --> 01:03:32,911
Ladies and gentlemen,
1324
01:03:32,913 --> 01:03:34,880
we have a huge surprise
for you today.
1325
01:03:34,882 --> 01:03:38,448
Backstage, we have Eddie,
and what he doesn't know
1326
01:03:38,450 --> 01:03:40,950
is through the help of you,
our viewing audience,
1327
01:03:40,952 --> 01:03:43,786
we have on hold right now,
1328
01:03:43,788 --> 01:03:46,024
the ever-elusive Judy.
1329
01:03:48,326 --> 01:03:50,591
So without further ado,
let's bring him out,
1330
01:03:50,593 --> 01:03:53,063
Eddie Krumble, the world's
most famous audience member.
1331
01:03:57,400 --> 01:03:59,802
Welcome back.
Good to see you.
1332
01:04:02,672 --> 01:04:04,004
Been quite a month, huh?
1333
01:04:04,006 --> 01:04:05,538
Sure has, Jayme.
1334
01:04:05,540 --> 01:04:06,939
Just think about it,
one month ago,
1335
01:04:06,941 --> 01:04:08,642
you were an obscure clapper,
1336
01:04:08,644 --> 01:04:12,744
and today the entire country
is rooting for you.
1337
01:04:12,746 --> 01:04:13,981
Yeah.
1338
01:04:14,615 --> 01:04:16,014
So let's get right down to it.
1339
01:04:16,016 --> 01:04:17,781
As you know,
last time you were here,
1340
01:04:17,783 --> 01:04:20,118
you were on,
looking for your friend Judy,
1341
01:04:20,120 --> 01:04:22,489
and I pledged
to help you find her.
1342
01:04:22,855 --> 01:04:24,488
And, well, um,
1343
01:04:24,490 --> 01:04:27,660
why don't we just let you
speak to her yourself.
1344
01:04:28,561 --> 01:04:29,496
Hello?
1345
01:04:30,497 --> 01:04:33,096
Hello. Eddie?
Eddie, are you there?
1346
01:04:33,098 --> 01:04:35,098
Judy, hi!
1347
01:04:35,100 --> 01:04:36,866
Is that you? Because
these people just called me
1348
01:04:36,868 --> 01:04:40,135
and Louise was showing me
you on the TV and...
1349
01:04:40,137 --> 01:04:41,836
- What's going on?
- Well...
1350
01:04:41,838 --> 01:04:43,537
And why were you at my job?
1351
01:04:43,539 --> 01:04:45,572
I saw you wearing this shirt
with my name on it,
1352
01:04:45,574 --> 01:04:47,608
making a joke about me
getting fired?
1353
01:04:47,610 --> 01:04:50,443
You think that's funny?
How could you do that?
1354
01:04:50,445 --> 01:04:53,446
Whoa, no, no, no.
They got this all wrong.
1355
01:04:53,448 --> 01:04:54,914
- I know what I saw, Eddie.
- No, Judy.
1356
01:04:54,916 --> 01:04:57,417
Eddie's actually really
gone to some great lengths
1357
01:04:57,419 --> 01:04:58,517
- to talk to you.
- Yeah.
1358
01:04:58,519 --> 01:04:59,952
Who is that with you?
1359
01:04:59,954 --> 01:05:02,891
- It's me, Jayme Stillerman.
- Who?
1360
01:05:03,491 --> 01:05:05,893
Just some guy on TV,
you know.
1361
01:05:06,126 --> 01:05:09,426
- On TV? Are we on TV now?
- You bet.
1362
01:05:09,428 --> 01:05:10,828
- No!
- No, not at all.
1363
01:05:10,830 --> 01:05:12,462
Not even one bit.
1364
01:05:12,464 --> 01:05:14,930
Yeah, we are, but it's not...
1365
01:05:14,932 --> 01:05:16,566
Are you kidding me?
1366
01:05:16,568 --> 01:05:18,467
Are these the people
you sent to my job,
1367
01:05:18,469 --> 01:05:19,635
the people that got me fired?
1368
01:05:19,637 --> 01:05:21,870
You told me these people
were stalking you,
1369
01:05:21,872 --> 01:05:23,605
- and now you're doing it to me?
- Stalking?
1370
01:05:23,607 --> 01:05:26,841
No, Judy. I don't believe Eddie
has been stalking you at all.
1371
01:05:26,843 --> 01:05:29,579
I'm sure he would love to, but
he doesn't know where you live.
1372
01:05:30,447 --> 01:05:31,912
Judy, you got the wrong idea.
1373
01:05:31,914 --> 01:05:34,048
I just didn't have any way
to get in touch with you,
1374
01:05:34,050 --> 01:05:35,214
so I did what I could.
1375
01:05:35,216 --> 01:05:37,583
You know how much that job
meant to me, Eddie.
1376
01:05:37,585 --> 01:05:39,823
You got me fired
for some dumb prank.
1377
01:05:40,455 --> 01:05:42,588
I can't believe
you would do that.
1378
01:05:42,590 --> 01:05:44,923
Please stop calling me,
stop harassing me.
1379
01:05:44,925 --> 01:05:46,892
I'm sorry.
Just stop, okay?
1380
01:05:46,894 --> 01:05:48,696
Hello?
1381
01:05:49,096 --> 01:05:51,431
Judy?
1382
01:05:51,632 --> 01:05:53,498
Somebody get her
back on the phone!
1383
01:05:53,500 --> 01:05:55,199
She says if we call again,
she's gonna call the police.
1384
01:05:55,201 --> 01:05:58,435
Okay. Okay, so she's
a little shaken.
1385
01:05:58,437 --> 01:05:59,604
Yeah, of course she's shaken.
1386
01:05:59,606 --> 01:06:01,906
You can't just call someone
and put 'em on television.
1387
01:06:01,908 --> 01:06:03,907
She was told straight away
this was gonna be a live feed.
1388
01:06:03,909 --> 01:06:05,474
She probably doesn't
know what that means.
1389
01:06:05,476 --> 01:06:07,177
I don't know what
a live feed means.
1390
01:06:07,179 --> 01:06:09,045
Just...
If you give me her number...
1391
01:06:09,047 --> 01:06:11,180
We can't.
Legally, we need permission.
1392
01:06:11,182 --> 01:06:12,417
Permission?
1393
01:06:13,484 --> 01:06:14,750
Since when do you give a damn
about permission?
1394
01:06:14,752 --> 01:06:16,151
You never asked for permission
any for stuff you did with me.
1395
01:06:16,153 --> 01:06:17,684
Wait, hold on a second.
1396
01:06:17,686 --> 01:06:19,519
When you did those infomercials,
you signed waivers
1397
01:06:19,521 --> 01:06:21,755
to any and all forms
of rebroadcast.
1398
01:06:21,757 --> 01:06:24,056
Yeah, well, you kinda took that
and ran with it, didn't you?
1399
01:06:24,058 --> 01:06:25,658
We want to see you
two back together.
1400
01:06:25,660 --> 01:06:27,093
The whole country
wants to see that.
1401
01:06:27,095 --> 01:06:28,962
I don't care what
the country wants.
1402
01:06:28,964 --> 01:06:29,999
I just want to talk to her.
1403
01:06:31,264 --> 01:06:31,831
We're gonna straighten this out.
We just need a couple of days,
1404
01:06:31,833 --> 01:06:33,668
I need you to trust me.
1405
01:06:35,503 --> 01:06:37,570
That's $15,000.
1406
01:06:37,572 --> 01:06:38,770
That is a lot of
applause, Eddie,
1407
01:06:38,772 --> 01:06:41,005
so just take a breath,
give us a beat,
1408
01:06:41,007 --> 01:06:43,007
and we are gonna get
the two of you back together.
1409
01:06:43,009 --> 01:06:44,578
- Promise.
- Like it never happened.
1410
01:06:45,477 --> 01:06:47,813
This isn't what I wanted.
You know that.
1411
01:06:53,817 --> 01:06:55,653
Ah.
1412
01:06:56,955 --> 01:06:58,424
Okay, Eddie.
1413
01:06:58,888 --> 01:07:00,524
Don't worry...
1414
01:07:01,624 --> 01:07:02,859
at all.
1415
01:07:05,728 --> 01:07:07,827
Just, you know,
like who could've thought
1416
01:07:07,829 --> 01:07:10,831
$15,000 would feel
so crummy, you know?
1417
01:07:10,833 --> 01:07:12,436
Yeah.
1418
01:07:14,102 --> 01:07:15,571
Thanks.
1419
01:07:16,238 --> 01:07:18,971
You're like always there,
you know?
1420
01:07:18,973 --> 01:07:20,041
Aw.
1421
01:07:20,507 --> 01:07:21,842
Well, yeah, I mean...
1422
01:07:22,809 --> 01:07:23,844
Yeah.
1423
01:07:24,779 --> 01:07:26,677
I can be a real jerk
sometimes, you know,
1424
01:07:26,679 --> 01:07:29,647
and you're like this guy,
1425
01:07:29,649 --> 01:07:31,248
and I know you got things
you could be doing,
1426
01:07:31,250 --> 01:07:32,850
but you're like
always there for me.
1427
01:07:32,852 --> 01:07:35,251
And I'm not trying
to make you uncomfortable.
1428
01:07:35,253 --> 01:07:37,456
I'm just pointing it out, okay?
1429
01:07:38,257 --> 01:07:40,460
Eddie, you're my friend.
1430
01:07:41,259 --> 01:07:42,627
Yeah.
1431
01:07:43,127 --> 01:07:44,125
That's it, huh?
1432
01:07:44,127 --> 01:07:45,896
- Yes!
- All right.
1433
01:07:46,763 --> 01:07:49,097
Don't worry. Everything's
gonna be okay, okay?
1434
01:07:49,099 --> 01:07:50,597
It is, right?
1435
01:07:50,599 --> 01:07:52,735
- I mean, that's...
- Gimme five, man.
1436
01:07:53,637 --> 01:07:54,902
See you tomorrow, okay?
1437
01:07:54,904 --> 01:07:56,069
- Okay.
- Later.
1438
01:07:56,071 --> 01:07:57,973
- Good night, Chris.
- All right.
1439
01:08:31,334 --> 01:08:33,335
Hello.
The Jayme Stillerman Show.
1440
01:08:33,337 --> 01:08:37,304
Can I speak to, um, Ralph?
Can I...
1441
01:08:37,306 --> 01:08:39,674
It's... It's Eddie Krumble!
1442
01:08:39,676 --> 01:08:41,912
I got to talk to Ralph Ranter
right now.
1443
01:08:42,945 --> 01:08:45,781
The... It's The Clapper!
1444
01:08:46,314 --> 01:08:48,582
- Hello, hello?
- Hey, Eddie.
1445
01:08:48,584 --> 01:08:50,350
- Hey, hey, Ralph.
- Listen, Eddie.
1446
01:08:50,352 --> 01:08:52,318
Things are starting to move
really fast here,
1447
01:08:52,320 --> 01:08:54,019
and I just have to ask you.
1448
01:08:54,021 --> 01:08:56,120
You don't have any kind
of criminal record
1449
01:08:56,122 --> 01:08:58,790
- or anything like that, do you?
- Are you kidding me?
1450
01:08:58,792 --> 01:09:01,224
What are you talking about?
I didn't even want to be on TV!
1451
01:09:01,226 --> 01:09:03,094
You're the ones
who did all this!
1452
01:09:03,096 --> 01:09:04,295
Criminal record!
1453
01:09:04,297 --> 01:09:06,996
I understand, man, but
she used the word "stalker."
1454
01:09:06,998 --> 01:09:08,799
I'm sure
it's a misunderstanding,
1455
01:09:08,801 --> 01:09:10,634
but there are a lot
of moving parts.
1456
01:09:10,636 --> 01:09:13,201
I'll come back on.
I'll straighten it all out.
1457
01:09:13,203 --> 01:09:14,469
I just gotta straighten it out.
1458
01:09:14,471 --> 01:09:17,973
We're gonna have to take a beat
on any further appearances.
1459
01:09:17,975 --> 01:09:20,674
- Why?
- There are rumors circulating,
1460
01:09:20,676 --> 01:09:22,811
and, uh, let me...
1461
01:09:22,813 --> 01:09:24,311
Rumors?
What are you talking about?
1462
01:09:24,313 --> 01:09:25,849
- Let me just call you.
- You can't...
1463
01:09:27,749 --> 01:09:30,184
Give me Judy's number.
I'll figure this out.
1464
01:09:30,186 --> 01:09:31,618
I can't do that, man.
1465
01:09:31,620 --> 01:09:33,752
She said what she said
live on air.
1466
01:09:33,754 --> 01:09:35,654
Once again,
she used the word "stalker."
1467
01:09:35,656 --> 01:09:37,357
That's a big deal
for the network, Eddie.
1468
01:09:37,359 --> 01:09:39,125
We're gonna have to kinda
just try to chill out
1469
01:09:39,127 --> 01:09:41,793
until all the dust settles,
and then we'll act.
1470
01:09:41,795 --> 01:09:44,896
Yeah, all right, we'll just sit
and let it settle, I guess.
1471
01:09:44,898 --> 01:09:46,697
- I'm sorry, Eddie.
- Yeah, all right.
1472
01:09:46,699 --> 01:09:48,999
The Clapper!
1473
01:09:49,001 --> 01:09:50,735
Hey, all right!
1474
01:09:50,737 --> 01:09:53,704
- We love you, Eddie!
- Ha-ha-ha!
1475
01:09:53,706 --> 01:09:56,609
Good stuff, right?
Good stuff!
1476
01:10:03,114 --> 01:10:05,113
Last night,
some stalking allegations
1477
01:10:05,115 --> 01:10:06,150
from Eddie Krumble,
1478
01:10:07,451 --> 01:10:08,985
better known as The Clapper,
from The Jayme Stillerman Show.
1479
01:10:13,922 --> 01:10:15,158
Hey, Marvin.
1480
01:10:16,224 --> 01:10:19,125
♪ Colorful ♪
1481
01:10:19,127 --> 01:10:23,731
♪ I'm in love with you ♪
1482
01:10:26,166 --> 01:10:28,870
♪ Colorful ♪
1483
01:10:29,137 --> 01:10:32,873
♪ Why am I loved by you ♪
1484
01:10:33,306 --> 01:10:38,274
♪ Sending out signals from me ♪
1485
01:10:38,276 --> 01:10:41,144
♪ Sending out signals ♪
1486
01:10:41,146 --> 01:10:43,313
The Clapper's
potential stalker past.
1487
01:10:43,315 --> 01:10:48,084
♪ Sending out signals to you ♪
1488
01:10:48,086 --> 01:10:51,122
♪ Sending out signals ♪
1489
01:11:25,718 --> 01:11:29,019
$13 all day.
High speed Hollywood bus tour.
1490
01:11:29,021 --> 01:11:31,087
Hollywood bus tour.
Hollywood bus tour.
1491
01:11:31,089 --> 01:11:34,055
Hey, Hollywood bus tour.
Hollywood bus tour.
1492
01:11:34,057 --> 01:11:36,192
Hollywood bus tour.
Hollywood bus tour.
1493
01:11:36,194 --> 01:11:38,927
$13 all day. Hop on, hop off.
1494
01:11:38,929 --> 01:11:40,929
Hollywood bus tour.
Hollywood bus tour.
1495
01:11:40,931 --> 01:11:43,000
And on tomorrow's
show, the return of The Clapper.
1496
01:11:43,266 --> 01:11:45,336
What's Eddie been up to?
Where's he been?
1497
01:11:45,735 --> 01:11:46,968
Has he found Judy yet?
1498
01:11:46,970 --> 01:11:49,806
All these answers and more
revealed tomorrow night
1499
01:11:50,005 --> 01:11:52,806
right here on
The Jayme Stillerman Show.
1500
01:11:52,808 --> 01:11:55,908
- Ah!
- Maybe it's good exposure.
1501
01:11:55,910 --> 01:11:58,410
No, it's not.
Not in this instance.
1502
01:11:58,412 --> 01:12:01,078
I don't like him going back
and doing those shows again
1503
01:12:01,080 --> 01:12:02,413
with those idiots.
1504
01:12:02,415 --> 01:12:04,349
I wanted him to move on
with his life,
1505
01:12:04,351 --> 01:12:06,150
but not like this, no.
1506
01:12:06,152 --> 01:12:08,919
- But, Ida.
- Last time, do you remember?
1507
01:12:08,921 --> 01:12:10,821
They made a damn fool
out of him.
1508
01:12:10,823 --> 01:12:12,523
He don't wanna answer the phone.
Is that what it is?
1509
01:12:12,525 --> 01:12:14,957
Well, I got news for ya.
We're gonna go out there.
1510
01:12:14,959 --> 01:12:16,962
Pack your bags, Gladys,
we're leaving.
1511
01:12:20,465 --> 01:12:21,963
Oh, there they are.
1512
01:12:21,965 --> 01:12:23,932
Eddie Krumble and Chris Plork.
1513
01:12:23,934 --> 01:12:26,235
Oh, so happy to be
back on the same team.
1514
01:12:26,237 --> 01:12:30,070
What's that old saying?
Tragedy plus time equals...
1515
01:12:30,072 --> 01:12:31,972
I don't know.
Who reads the Bible anymore?
1516
01:12:31,974 --> 01:12:34,775
Come on in, guys.
America missed you guys,
1517
01:12:34,777 --> 01:12:37,077
and we are gonna
spark this baby back up.
1518
01:12:37,079 --> 01:12:39,880
This is Eddie Krumble,
leave a message at the beep.
1519
01:12:39,882 --> 01:12:42,248
Eddie, it's your mother.
1520
01:12:42,250 --> 01:12:45,216
They finally let me
turn my damn phone back on.
1521
01:12:45,218 --> 01:12:46,484
I'm here with Gladys.
1522
01:12:46,486 --> 01:12:49,220
I'm here to talk some sense
into you, you big bozo.
1523
01:12:49,222 --> 01:12:53,393
The world's greatest
audience is in the hizzoua!
1524
01:13:01,800 --> 01:13:04,065
Now, ladies and gentlemen,
it is my utmost pleasure
1525
01:13:04,067 --> 01:13:06,868
to introduce mine
and your old friends,
1526
01:13:06,870 --> 01:13:09,141
Eddie Krumble and Chris Plork.
1527
01:13:18,146 --> 01:13:20,984
Eddie! Chris!
1528
01:13:21,516 --> 01:13:24,320
Hey, look at that,
they missed you.
1529
01:13:25,087 --> 01:13:26,151
Eddie and Chris,
1530
01:13:26,153 --> 01:13:30,123
first of all, it is great
to have you both back.
1531
01:13:30,125 --> 01:13:31,557
I mean, when my producers
reached out,
1532
01:13:31,559 --> 01:13:34,128
we were expecting
a solid no.
1533
01:13:34,295 --> 01:13:35,860
Hmm.
1534
01:13:35,862 --> 01:13:38,363
But why don't we start with,
well, I don't know,
1535
01:13:38,365 --> 01:13:39,529
where it all went wrong?
1536
01:13:39,531 --> 01:13:41,165
- Hmm.
- Yeah.
1537
01:13:41,167 --> 01:13:43,167
You gotta back up pretty far,
I guess, right?
1538
01:13:43,169 --> 01:13:46,069
It was like something
sort of in the beginning.
1539
01:13:46,071 --> 01:13:47,038
Right.
1540
01:13:47,972 --> 01:13:49,872
I mean, there were these,
you know, mis...
1541
01:13:49,874 --> 01:13:52,008
Um, like what,
misunderstandings?
1542
01:13:52,010 --> 01:13:54,043
Communication breakdowns.
1543
01:13:54,045 --> 01:13:56,411
Yeah, exactly.
Communication breakdowns that,
1544
01:13:56,413 --> 01:13:57,980
suffice to say,
were simply that.
1545
01:13:57,982 --> 01:14:01,882
There was no wrongdoing
on either part, you know.
1546
01:14:01,884 --> 01:14:04,153
Actually, I'm just happy
you're back, aren't we?
1547
01:14:06,389 --> 01:14:09,590
So, that's out of the way,
where have you guys been?
1548
01:14:09,592 --> 01:14:13,460
Um, we do, like,
some grand openings sometimes,
1549
01:14:13,462 --> 01:14:15,193
like Ralph's
Supermarkets, we did.
1550
01:14:15,195 --> 01:14:17,496
They did an Internet thing
with us too,
1551
01:14:17,498 --> 01:14:19,468
and we got a...
1552
01:14:19,967 --> 01:14:21,465
Chuck E. Cheese thing too.
1553
01:14:21,467 --> 01:14:24,201
I bet the kids are lining up
to meet you at Chuck E. Cheese.
1554
01:14:24,203 --> 01:14:27,272
- It's mostly for the parents.
- Yeah.
1555
01:14:27,274 --> 01:14:28,440
Thanks for clearing that up.
1556
01:14:28,940 --> 01:14:31,909
Yeah, we shake hands,
take pictures.
1557
01:14:31,911 --> 01:14:35,178
We're like balloons,
but people.
1558
01:14:35,180 --> 01:14:37,946
And people you are.
1559
01:14:37,948 --> 01:14:40,315
Now, Eddie,
1560
01:14:40,317 --> 01:14:43,050
the question
everybody's dying to know is
1561
01:14:43,052 --> 01:14:45,489
what happened
with you and Judy?
1562
01:14:45,990 --> 01:14:48,422
I don't give a damn
about a red light!
1563
01:14:48,424 --> 01:14:50,191
- Mom!
- Is that your mom?
1564
01:14:50,193 --> 01:14:52,893
I am his mom,
and you tell this moron
1565
01:14:52,895 --> 01:14:54,362
if he touches me again,
1566
01:14:54,364 --> 01:14:56,529
he's gonna be spitting teeth
out of his crapper.
1567
01:14:56,531 --> 01:14:58,397
- Mrs. Krumble is here!
- Gladys?
1568
01:14:58,399 --> 01:15:00,967
- Get out of the way.
- Are you nuts? We're on TV.
1569
01:15:00,969 --> 01:15:03,502
I know where we are, Eddie.
Hi, how are ya?
1570
01:15:03,504 --> 01:15:04,970
Ronnie, it's all right,
she's with us.
1571
01:15:04,972 --> 01:15:06,638
Oh, no, I'm not with this.
1572
01:15:06,640 --> 01:15:08,844
You bring my son,
and you put him on this show,
1573
01:15:09,109 --> 01:15:11,141
and you made a damn fool
out of him.
1574
01:15:11,143 --> 01:15:13,043
And all he was doing
was looking for his girl.
1575
01:15:13,045 --> 01:15:16,180
He came back on your show again,
your crummy show!
1576
01:15:16,182 --> 01:15:18,114
- Mrs. Krumble...
- Don't do it now.
1577
01:15:18,116 --> 01:15:21,484
- This is insane. We're on TV.
- I know where we are!
1578
01:15:21,486 --> 01:15:24,220
And he came with good intentions
because he's my son.
1579
01:15:24,222 --> 01:15:25,987
- He's a good boy.
- Absolutely.
1580
01:15:25,989 --> 01:15:28,523
He was trying
to find his girl,
1581
01:15:28,525 --> 01:15:30,026
and then when
there was a problem,
1582
01:15:30,028 --> 01:15:31,962
a controversy,
what did you do?
1583
01:15:32,229 --> 01:15:34,596
You dropped him
like a half-filled rubber.
1584
01:15:34,598 --> 01:15:35,931
- Yeah!
- Mrs. Krumble, please.
1585
01:15:35,933 --> 01:15:37,399
- Damn!
- Please, Mrs. Krumble.
1586
01:15:37,401 --> 01:15:39,099
We love Eddie here.
1587
01:15:39,101 --> 01:15:41,467
We love Eddie! Yeah, yeah!
1588
01:15:41,469 --> 01:15:43,136
Listen to this bullshit.
Shut up!
1589
01:15:43,138 --> 01:15:44,971
We just wanted what was
best for Eddie and Judy.
1590
01:15:44,973 --> 01:15:46,171
Oh, really? Oh, I see.
1591
01:15:46,173 --> 01:15:47,674
You want to know
what's best for my son?
1592
01:15:47,676 --> 01:15:48,809
- Is that what you want to know?
- Absolutely.
1593
01:15:48,811 --> 01:15:51,144
Is that what you're asking me,
what's best for my son?
1594
01:15:51,146 --> 01:15:52,011
Don't do it.
1595
01:15:52,013 --> 01:15:54,047
Let me tell ya
what's best for my son.
1596
01:15:58,151 --> 01:15:59,151
Hey, look at me!
1597
01:15:59,153 --> 01:16:01,421
- No, no. Let me beat the shit...
- Hey, Mom, Mom!
1598
01:16:06,024 --> 01:16:08,158
I want to talk to this man!
1599
01:16:08,160 --> 01:16:10,159
- I have something to say!
- Okay, but calm down!
1600
01:16:10,161 --> 01:16:12,428
This is nuts.
This is completely insane.
1601
01:16:12,430 --> 01:16:14,665
Nuts, nuts, nuts, nuts!
I know this.
1602
01:16:15,465 --> 01:16:18,303
Enough! This is nuts,
This is completely insane.
1603
01:16:18,436 --> 01:16:20,668
You gotta calm down, all right?
We're on TV here.
1604
01:16:20,670 --> 01:16:24,005
This TV stuff, it's too much.
1605
01:16:24,007 --> 01:16:26,277
- This is not for me, all right?
- All right.
1606
01:16:26,543 --> 01:16:29,375
You don't gotta fight my battles
for me, all right?
1607
01:16:29,377 --> 01:16:30,380
I can fight my own battles.
1608
01:16:31,581 --> 01:16:32,379
I was gonna come on here and
give you a piece of my mind.
1609
01:16:32,381 --> 01:16:33,380
I was really gonna
let you have it.
1610
01:16:33,382 --> 01:16:36,048
I was. I was, but I looked
around, you know,
1611
01:16:36,050 --> 01:16:37,650
I probably have my own part
in all of this.
1612
01:16:37,652 --> 01:16:39,185
Okay, now that is sounding
more rational.
1613
01:16:39,187 --> 01:16:41,553
- Oh, shut up.
- Of course. I'm over here.
1614
01:16:41,555 --> 01:16:44,122
Yeah, so no one's
innocent, right?
1615
01:16:44,124 --> 01:16:47,725
No one's innocent,
so we're just gonna go. Mom?
1616
01:16:47,727 --> 01:16:50,461
That's what we're gonna do.
We're gonna go, and that's it.
1617
01:16:50,463 --> 01:16:52,429
Eddie, Eddie, Eddie, wait.
1618
01:16:52,431 --> 01:16:56,165
Eddie, things just got
a little bit away from us.
1619
01:16:56,167 --> 01:16:58,067
- Oh, you think?
- Yes, we do, we do.
1620
01:16:58,069 --> 01:16:59,335
- Yes, I think.
- Oh, really?
1621
01:16:59,337 --> 01:17:02,474
No, it's all right,
Ma, relax, okay?
1622
01:17:02,640 --> 01:17:03,737
They're just doing their thing.
1623
01:17:03,739 --> 01:17:07,244
This is what you do, right?
We all played our parts.
1624
01:17:08,244 --> 01:17:09,314
It just...
1625
01:17:10,045 --> 01:17:11,412
I just lost the only person
1626
01:17:11,414 --> 01:17:15,152
that mattered to this
whole thing, all right?
1627
01:17:16,152 --> 01:17:17,553
And I had someone once.
1628
01:17:18,219 --> 01:17:20,619
- Diana.
- We had this dumb idea.
1629
01:17:20,621 --> 01:17:22,756
We were gonna come out here
and win a boat or something
1630
01:17:22,758 --> 01:17:24,092
on The Price is Right.
1631
01:17:24,257 --> 01:17:26,224
Yeah, but then she
went away, right?
1632
01:17:26,226 --> 01:17:30,763
She died, and I didn't have
a plan to do it without her.
1633
01:17:30,765 --> 01:17:32,099
It was too much.
1634
01:17:32,231 --> 01:17:34,298
But I came out here,
and I met Chris,
1635
01:17:34,300 --> 01:17:37,335
and we got this kinda fun job,
and after a while,
1636
01:17:37,337 --> 01:17:39,468
the sadness just kinda
slowly goes away.
1637
01:17:39,470 --> 01:17:42,474
And you know, it's still there,
but it's further back.
1638
01:17:44,175 --> 01:17:46,175
And then I got to know Judy,
1639
01:17:46,177 --> 01:17:50,111
and suddenly, even corny stuff
like going to the museum
1640
01:17:50,113 --> 01:17:51,780
was kinda fun, I guess,
1641
01:17:51,782 --> 01:17:55,352
and then, before you know it,
I'm like...
1642
01:17:56,285 --> 01:17:58,588
What, are you kidding me?
Like...
1643
01:18:06,827 --> 01:18:09,728
I can't believe I was gonna
be okay without that
1644
01:18:09,730 --> 01:18:11,500
the rest of my life.
1645
01:18:13,200 --> 01:18:17,005
Like, how does that work?
1646
01:18:19,173 --> 01:18:21,137
So you could have done
whatever you wanted with me.
1647
01:18:21,139 --> 01:18:22,773
I would've done anything.
1648
01:18:22,775 --> 01:18:24,378
You could have done
anything you wanted.
1649
01:18:25,143 --> 01:18:27,279
I would've played ball,
whatever.
1650
01:18:28,747 --> 01:18:30,412
I just wanted to find Judy
1651
01:18:30,414 --> 01:18:33,019
and tell her that
I loved her, I guess.
1652
01:18:36,287 --> 01:18:40,354
It is what it is, right?
It's okay. We're here.
1653
01:18:40,356 --> 01:18:42,690
Me and Chris,
we're gonna be fine.
1654
01:18:42,692 --> 01:18:44,595
We're good, we always are.
1655
01:18:45,361 --> 01:18:47,195
Hey, you know,
we got our thing.
1656
01:18:47,197 --> 01:18:49,195
We're gonna be
at the Big A Supermarket
1657
01:18:49,197 --> 01:18:51,765
tomorrow afternoon, right off
Santa Monica Boulevard.
1658
01:18:51,767 --> 01:18:54,667
Come on down and see us, right?
We're gonna be selling...
1659
01:18:54,669 --> 01:18:56,101
What is it, what?
1660
01:18:56,103 --> 01:18:57,303
National Nut Day.
1661
01:18:57,305 --> 01:18:59,508
Right, yeah, National Nut Day.
1662
01:19:00,775 --> 01:19:03,310
- Making a living.
- Making a living.
1663
01:19:07,346 --> 01:19:10,446
Well, the good news is
we're outta that monkey hut.
1664
01:19:10,448 --> 01:19:11,647
Oh, yeah.
1665
01:19:11,649 --> 01:19:14,450
Mrs. Krumble.
Mrs. Krumble, wait.
1666
01:19:14,452 --> 01:19:16,852
- Oh, God, not another one.
- No, no, it's not like that.
1667
01:19:16,854 --> 01:19:20,189
Mrs. Krumble, guys,
we just want you to know...
1668
01:19:20,191 --> 01:19:21,656
What, that you're
gonna give him a dryer
1669
01:19:21,658 --> 01:19:22,824
if he comes back on your show
1670
01:19:22,826 --> 01:19:25,159
and makes a monkey
out of himself?
1671
01:19:25,161 --> 01:19:26,327
That's not a bad comeback.
1672
01:19:26,329 --> 01:19:28,195
Look, if there's
anything we can do.
1673
01:19:28,197 --> 01:19:29,663
No. No, there isn't,
1674
01:19:29,665 --> 01:19:31,866
You've done enough, thank you.
1675
01:19:31,868 --> 01:19:33,602
Eddie, come on.
1676
01:19:35,238 --> 01:19:38,303
Hey, you know, I guess
TV's pretty cool, right?
1677
01:19:38,305 --> 01:19:42,243
As long as the whole world's
not laughing at you.
1678
01:19:44,211 --> 01:19:47,214
Yeah, hey. You know?
1679
01:19:48,215 --> 01:19:50,149
Goodbye, Mr. Stinkman.
1680
01:19:50,151 --> 01:19:51,486
Bye, Chris.
1681
01:19:51,884 --> 01:19:54,752
Hey, big thing
at the supermarket, guys.
1682
01:19:54,754 --> 01:19:57,157
Happy National Nut Day!
1683
01:19:59,490 --> 01:20:02,194
- Happy National Nut Day?
- I'm emotional.
1684
01:20:14,770 --> 01:20:16,737
I'm gonna get
something to drink.
1685
01:20:16,739 --> 01:20:18,141
You want anything?
1686
01:20:35,622 --> 01:20:37,258
It's a little doggie.
1687
01:20:46,666 --> 01:20:49,135
"Saw you guys on TV last night."
1688
01:20:52,836 --> 01:20:54,173
What the...
1689
01:21:02,645 --> 01:21:05,348
Okay, it's, uh...
1690
01:21:05,582 --> 01:21:06,746
There's a pig.
1691
01:21:06,748 --> 01:21:08,317
In the parking lot.
1692
01:21:08,950 --> 01:21:10,817
How's that work, huh?
1693
01:21:10,819 --> 01:21:13,589
- I've seen it all.
- Hey, man, what's going on?
1694
01:21:14,556 --> 01:21:16,424
- Hey!
- Pretty dog.
1695
01:21:21,696 --> 01:21:23,229
Hey, Judy.
1696
01:21:23,996 --> 01:21:25,532
Judy!
1697
01:21:27,567 --> 01:21:29,170
Hi, Chris.
1698
01:21:32,538 --> 01:21:33,671
Hey, uh...
1699
01:21:33,673 --> 01:21:37,776
Before you say anything,
I just want to tell you that...
1700
01:21:39,644 --> 01:21:42,280
I love you, also.
1701
01:21:47,617 --> 01:21:48,785
Come on.
1702
01:21:51,653 --> 01:21:52,688
What?
1703
01:21:53,723 --> 01:21:56,693
I love you, Eddie.
1704
01:21:58,626 --> 01:21:59,727
For real?
1705
01:22:04,898 --> 01:22:06,467
I love you.
1706
01:22:07,467 --> 01:22:08,899
All right, okay.
1707
01:22:08,901 --> 01:22:11,002
Um, I don't know
what to say.
1708
01:22:11,004 --> 01:22:12,506
Okay.
1709
01:22:12,904 --> 01:22:14,373
I love you too.
1710
01:22:15,507 --> 01:22:16,475
I love you too.
1711
01:22:17,976 --> 01:22:19,411
You know that, right?
1712
01:22:19,644 --> 01:22:21,910
Do you know
that I'm nuts about you?
1713
01:22:21,912 --> 01:22:23,281
No.
1714
01:22:24,549 --> 01:22:27,416
I'm crazy about you,
are you kidding me?
1715
01:22:27,418 --> 01:22:30,554
Yeah. I'm National Nut Day
nuts about you.
1716
01:22:33,822 --> 01:22:35,325
Hi, Grady.
1717
01:22:35,924 --> 01:22:37,360
He's got one horn.
1718
01:22:39,361 --> 01:22:41,497
- He's very excited to meet you.
- Apparently.
1719
01:22:44,166 --> 01:22:47,536
I'm so sorry about everything,
I just, I got out of my head.
1720
01:22:48,368 --> 01:22:49,570
Things got out of control,
1721
01:22:50,772 --> 01:22:52,838
and I didn't know how to,
I didn't know how to handle it,
1722
01:22:52,840 --> 01:22:54,905
and I did the wrong thing,
right?
1723
01:22:54,907 --> 01:22:56,373
I'm so sorry.
1724
01:22:56,375 --> 01:22:58,378
But you're here.
You came back.
1725
01:22:58,577 --> 01:23:00,481
I don't know where you went,
but you're back.
1726
01:23:00,847 --> 01:23:03,650
- I came from around the corner.
- That's unbelievable.
1727
01:23:04,816 --> 01:23:06,518
What are the odds?
1728
01:23:06,986 --> 01:23:09,588
What are the odds?
I love you, you love me.
1729
01:23:11,855 --> 01:23:13,458
You know what?
1730
01:23:16,393 --> 01:23:17,662
Let's get married.
1731
01:23:19,630 --> 01:23:20,731
What?
1732
01:23:21,398 --> 01:23:23,963
Let's get married.
Yeah, come on.
1733
01:23:23,965 --> 01:23:25,732
I mean, we love each other.
1734
01:23:25,734 --> 01:23:28,335
Don't think about it too much
because if you give me time,
1735
01:23:28,337 --> 01:23:29,968
I will screw it up,
I promise you.
1736
01:23:29,970 --> 01:23:32,038
- Okay.
- Okay. Wait. Okay?
1737
01:23:32,040 --> 01:23:33,773
- Yeah. Yeah.
- Huh? Wait, what?
1738
01:23:33,775 --> 01:23:35,842
- I mean, will you?
- Yes.
1739
01:23:35,844 --> 01:23:36,875
- Yes?
- Yes.
1740
01:23:36,877 --> 01:23:38,943
All right! Yes?
1741
01:23:38,945 --> 01:23:40,813
- Yes!
- Yes!
1742
01:23:40,815 --> 01:23:42,417
We're getting married!
1743
01:23:42,615 --> 01:23:44,415
Chris, we're getting married!
1744
01:23:44,417 --> 01:23:45,950
Come on! Oh, my God!
1745
01:23:45,952 --> 01:23:47,852
We're getting married!
1746
01:23:47,854 --> 01:23:50,553
Are you kidding me?
1747
01:23:50,555 --> 01:23:54,724
Oh, my God,
you're the best.
1748
01:23:54,726 --> 01:23:56,528
I missed you, Eddie.
1749
01:24:06,436 --> 01:24:08,873
Okay, let's get
some smiles in here.
1750
01:24:09,572 --> 01:24:11,439
Come on, look at the pig.
He'll make you smile.
1751
01:24:11,441 --> 01:24:13,806
Remember, it's a wedding,
not a funeral.
1752
01:24:13,808 --> 01:24:16,745
One, two, three!
Got you!
1753
01:24:18,579 --> 01:24:21,446
♪ Get on, get on, get on ♪
1754
01:24:21,448 --> 01:24:24,450
♪ They say
It's all about the chase ♪
1755
01:24:24,452 --> 01:24:27,418
♪ Get on, get on, get on ♪
1756
01:24:27,420 --> 01:24:30,422
♪ Some things you
Just can't escape ♪
1757
01:24:30,424 --> 01:24:33,056
♪ Bye, bye, bye ♪
1758
01:24:33,058 --> 01:24:36,025
♪ When all your life goes by ♪
1759
01:24:36,027 --> 01:24:40,598
♪ Bye, bye, bye, and bye ♪
1760
01:24:44,735 --> 01:24:47,436
♪ I tell you
I won't let you down ♪
1761
01:24:47,438 --> 01:24:50,671
♪ But I think
I might've spoke too soon ♪
1762
01:24:50,673 --> 01:24:53,408
♪ I never said
I could be friends ♪
1763
01:24:53,410 --> 01:24:56,511
♪ With everybody in the room ♪
1764
01:24:56,513 --> 01:24:59,013
♪ Get on, get on, get on ♪
1765
01:24:59,015 --> 01:25:02,149
♪ See the lines on my face ♪
1766
01:25:02,151 --> 01:25:04,885
♪ Come on, come on, come on ♪
1767
01:25:04,887 --> 01:25:08,020
♪ You know the night
Is getting late ♪
1768
01:25:08,022 --> 01:25:10,956
♪ Bye, bye, bye ♪
1769
01:25:10,958 --> 01:25:13,926
♪ When all your life goes by ♪
1770
01:25:13,928 --> 01:25:18,432
♪ Bye, bye, bye, and bye ♪
1771
01:25:19,699 --> 01:25:22,766
♪ Monday
Another whistle blows ♪
1772
01:25:22,768 --> 01:25:25,535
♪ Tuesday
I'm going to a show ♪
1773
01:25:25,537 --> 01:25:28,205
♪ Friday
I'm a working stiff ♪
1774
01:25:28,207 --> 01:25:32,644
♪ You don't know how I live ♪
1775
01:25:37,214 --> 01:25:40,114
♪ Your favorite film
Opened up ♪
1776
01:25:40,116 --> 01:25:42,882
♪ The year that I was born ♪
1777
01:25:42,884 --> 01:25:45,719
♪ I didn't know
What to say to you ♪
1778
01:25:45,721 --> 01:25:48,122
♪ But I knew we'd get along... ♪
1779
01:25:48,124 --> 01:25:49,657
Hi, I'm Billy Blanks.
1780
01:25:49,659 --> 01:25:51,156
- Nice to meet you.
- How can I help you?
1781
01:25:51,158 --> 01:25:52,724
I would like to become fit.
1782
01:25:52,726 --> 01:25:55,795
Your left shoulder.
Left, right, just like that.
1783
01:25:55,797 --> 01:25:56,599
One.
1784
01:25:57,599 --> 01:25:58,563
- Two, three...
- Okay, now hold that squat now.
1785
01:25:58,565 --> 01:26:00,031
What I want you to do is not
move your body
1786
01:26:00,033 --> 01:26:01,133
so much like this.
1787
01:26:01,135 --> 01:26:02,937
Just a little chuckle.
That's a joke.
1788
01:26:03,604 --> 01:26:05,672
♪ When all
Your life goes by... ♪
1789
01:26:06,005 --> 01:26:08,839
So it's a spoon and a fork
on a collapsible plate,
1790
01:26:08,841 --> 01:26:10,842
all in one, and you don't have
to wait for anything ever?
1791
01:26:10,844 --> 01:26:13,777
That's the best invention ever.
And it folds!
1792
01:26:13,779 --> 01:26:16,979
- And it's three-dimensional.
- Yeah.
1793
01:26:16,981 --> 01:26:18,179
Let me get this straight.
1794
01:26:18,181 --> 01:26:19,782
I can eat
anything I want all day,
1795
01:26:19,784 --> 01:26:22,818
take one of these pills,
and I'm good?
1796
01:26:22,820 --> 01:26:24,219
It is so simple.
1797
01:26:24,221 --> 01:26:27,222
It delivers a little grip
without slip.
1798
01:26:27,224 --> 01:26:28,889
Grip with no slip!
1799
01:26:28,891 --> 01:26:30,191
- Go one, count it.
- Two.
1800
01:26:30,193 --> 01:26:32,191
- Go, go.
- Three, four.
1801
01:26:32,193 --> 01:26:35,598
Go.
1802
01:26:54,849 --> 01:26:59,849
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