Original subtitles

Previously on The Five Star Weekend:

- I come bearing booze. - Thank you.

- Wait, wait. - It's a good bottle.

- It's not cheap. - This is yours.

- Here I go. - Ooh.

I should-- I'm gonna go.

I got a weird message from the hospital.

They have my results already.

"Take care" like, "Chill out, you're fine,"

or like, "You're gonna die"?

I don't know, baby.

This Posey thing, it's not going away.

J.B. could fire me.

Stubbys and then it's spa time.

- Yum. - There's the lighthouse.

Dru-Ann: Oh, wait.

Maybe you could just order in?

I don't know how long I'll be here.

I'll be here as long as she needs me.

Well, I don't know

what you're in the mood for, babe.

What does your tummy feel like?

Maybe Thai?

I gotta go.

Hi. Hey.

- It's him. - Yeah.

- It's Matthew. - Okay.

I'm so sorry.

Oh, God. Okay.

- First thing-- - I'm sorry for...

calling you so last minute.

- Please don't be sorry. - I'm so sorry.

No, no, no, I am so glad you called.

It's okay, Hollis, it's okay.

Are those candy canes on your pants?

Oh, God. These are my Christmas leggings.

I don't usually wear them out of the house,

but I got your text and I came right away.

They're actually comfortable. Do you want them?

No, Hollis does not wanna wear your leggings--

- Maybe I do? - Okay, they're yours.

They're yours.

- Thank you for being here. - Of course.

Thank you.

- I think I need to sit down. - Yeah.

Okay, here we go. Here we go. There you go.

Yeah.

I just don't know how we do it.

I don't know how we do it. I just don't know how.

What will I tell Caroline?

How will I tell my daughter?

- I'm right here. I'm right here. - He's gone.

- Brooke? - Sorry, what?

You were so quiet during lunch. You okay?

I'm good. Yeah.

- Want a crisp? - No.

Okay.

We call them chips, um, in America.

Are we gonna be weird now?

Why weird? Did you guys fight?

- We had a healthy discussion. - We didn't fight.

It's Caroline.

I yelled at her in the street and--

And it felt amazing.

Good for you, woman, it's about time.

She shouldn't be helping me with my feelings,

I should be helping her work through hers.

Well, you're grieving too.

Thank you.

For that, you get a Twizzler.

Thanks.

Mm! How do y'all eat those things?

They taste like flip-flops.

You are so wrong about that.

- They're the perfect car candy. - They're the perfect car candy.

- Jinx. - Jinx.

Cheers.

Who's ready for the spa?

Mm! Hell, yeah!

I'm ready. Blood facials, diamonds up our butts, whatever.

Hell, no.

♪ Now there was a time ♪

♪ When you loved me so ♪

♪ See, I've been a bad Bad, bad, bad girl ♪

♪ And I've been deep ♪

♪ How do ya like me now? ♪

Good afternoon, welcome to Honey and Sage.

Excuse me. Allergies.

You have such a cute sneeze.

Oh. Thank you. Appointment or walk-in?

- Appointment. - Okay.

Electra Undergrove.

I'm checking in for the premium salt-glow body scrub

and the Morpheus8 treatment.

It's a pleasure to have you with us, Ms. Undergrove.

Question, has Hollis Shaw arrived yet with her party?

She's a close friend.

- Oh. - I am so moved

watching her get her groove back.

I just wanna say hi and blessings.

Without disrupting the flow of my services, obviously.

- Of course. - Yeah, so are they here yet?

It says they should be on their itinerary.

So, unfortunately, it is against spa policy for me

to give out information about other guests.

Excuse me.

I wonder if it's also against policy for you to come into work

while sick with some sort of avian flu.

Oh. Heh-heh.

- It's seasonal allergies. - Right.

Either way, I'm gonna go ahead and cancel,

just to be safe.

I should probably tell Hollis

not to bother coming either.

I wouldn't want you getting her sick.

- No, I-- - What's your name?

For my Yelp review?

You know what? Never mind.

I'll just write "the doe-eyed receptionist."

They'll be here at 1:00.

Wonderful.

Thank you so much, mama.

I knew we could figure this out together.

Where is the women's lounge?

So, you'll be, um, locker number three,

and it's right over there.

Thank you.

Bless you.

Sorry, stars.

Oh, my God.

Caroline, stop being a slut. What is wrong with you?

This is your new friend's boyfriend.

If anyone wants to add anything to your massage,

like hot stones, or aromatherapy,

or anything, go for it.

It's my treat.

You mean like rocks from outside?

Actually, I changed your massage to special healing energy...

- Jesus. - It'll be good. Just try it.

Okay.

Hey, Dru. Is this your estrogen patch?

I can barely see it.

Mine looks like a giant Band-Aid.

I still get my period. Sometimes.

Show-off.

Tatum and I started one day apart when we were 12.

Oh, wow, even your cycles are besties.

I'm excited for no more periods.

I'm ready to be fully discarded by society.

It is liberating.

What about you, Brooke?

You wanna join in on this pity party?

Yeah, no, I'm gross too.

Or what are you guys talking about?

- Menopause. - Oh, my meno hasn't paused yet.

But I've been really moody and I'm hairy.

- Hairy. - Okay.

Let's be showered and ready to head home by 4:00

'cause we need time to change before cocktails--

Holly, we are at a spa. Relax.

Yeah. I don't really do that.

Yeah, you know what? We have to turn your brain off.

How about...?

Weed mint, anyone?

Eat me.

I haven't been high in years.

It makes me really weird and paranoid and--

No, it's mild. You'll be fine. It's like a glass of wine.

I'll do it if Gigi does it.

All right then. Thanks.

- Mm-hm. - All right. Cheers.

- Brooke? - Yes.

- Cheers. - Yes, yum.

Delicious. Yummy, I love it.

Down the hatch.

- It's delicious. - Perfect.

All right, time to go and ice these bones in the cold plunge.

I'm gonna find some snacks before the munchies hit.

I'm gonna lay in the salt-room thingy before my massage.

Do you wanna come? Just warning, weed makes me existential.

- Mm. Me too. - Gigi, maybe we should go

to the steam room. You and me.

Hm.

- Okay. - Okay. I'll come with you guys--

Oh but, you have the facial.

I don't want you to overstimulate your pores.

Why don't we just go? We'll meet you there.

We'll meet you somewhere. We'll find you.

Hm.

Gigi : I think I'm sweating tequila.

This is amazing.

- My pores thank you. - What pores?

Okay, what's up?

Is this about the kiss? Because honestly, it's fine.

- You knew Matthew. - What?

Yes, I saw a picture of you together on your phone in the--

- Oh, my God. - The little memories part.

- You were together. - Oh, my God.

- We were but I can explain. - Do that.

Actually...

I can't.

Nothing I say can explain...

Yeah, that's what I thought.

...or justify any of this.

The whole thing is so fucked up, Brooke.

Okay, well, you better try to figure it out,

otherwise I'm gonna go tell Hollis who you really are,

and I'm gonna ruin this poor woman's already-ruined life.

Okay?

After Matthew died, I was so lonely...

Do not try to make me feel sorry for you. Please, please.

I'm not. I'm not.

I reached out to Hollis and we just-- We connected.

- Okay. Right. - And then we kept talking.

And it made us both feel better.

Okay, but why, why, why would you come here?

- Because she invited me. - But still.

I should never've said yes, but I didn't wanna let her down!

None of this was planned, I promise you.

Okay.

- Brooke... - What?

He was...

the first person that I've ever loved.

- Stop. Stop. Stop. - Neither of us

meant for it to happen. Sorry, sorry, sorry.

- Are you gonna tell her? - I don't--

I don't know. I don't know.

I need to figure out what's best for Hollis, Gigi.

If that's even your real name.

It's Georgina.

Oh...

That's so cute.

Fuck. Okay, no, I am going to go.

I'm leaving, you stay here.

Do not follow me.

Oh, my God.

Fuck!

It's the mom friend.

She saw one of those stupid memory

picture things on my phone--

Miss! I'm so sorry, there's no cell phones.

Oh, I'm sorry. It's the nanny.

Kids...

Okay, hold on.

You went to Hollis's house with pictures

of her husband on your phone?

That's what the cloud is for.

No, it was in my memories.

What am I gonna do?

You could just get the hell out of there.

- Hey. - Hey.

I can't leave now that Brooke knows.

If Hollis finds out the truth,

I want her to hear it from me.

Yeah, so, you're just living on Nantucket now?

No, I'm trapped.

And I think I'm high.

Oh, God. I'm trapped and high.

I am so stupid.

- I gotta go. - No, Gigi--

- Hey. - Hi.

- You feeling anything yet? - A little. But I'm cool.

I need this.

- Don't tell anyone. - No.

Um...

So, what's your deal, hm? What are you not telling us?

How do you mean?

I mean, did you win a Hollibabe caption contest?

Are you just trying to get a blue check?

'Cause you know you can buy those. What is it?

I'm just here for Hollis.

Like everyone else.

Well, I'm-- I need to go and sweat out my demons.

How is it?

Hi.

Hi.

You're still here.

I can think about you, and you're here.

I miss how you used to

shave over the sink and get all your beard hairs in it

and just leave them.

There is no way you miss that.

I do. I...

I miss the hairs.

I miss your sinus sounds.

When you were clearing your sinuses and like...

Ho-ugh!

I even miss...

getting bored by your bird talks.

- Bird talks? - Yes.

You would start talking about some

ruby-throated booby that you saw and--

- Warbler! - Okay, and I would--

Ruby-throated warbler!

I would pretend to listen, but really...

Really, I was just sending emails in my head.

You knew I loved you.

Right?

What do you think?

We were broken, weren't we?

- Hollis-- - Hollis?

I have you for a 2:00 p.m. massage?

Yes, thanks.

Just some charming crudités...

Yes!

Onion dip.

- Wow. - And cheese straws,

shortbread...

My mom is extremely domesticated.

It's very extra. I'm sorry.

Extra what? Extra dope?

I mean, my mom can't even toast Otis's waffle.

Like, I ask her to toast it,

and it's somehow burnt and frozen at the same time.

My mom is not cool like your mom.

- My mom isn't cool. - Come on.

She cares about how shit looks just as much as your mom does.

She-- She didn't talk to me for a week

after I told her I was pregnant.

- That's awful. - Mm-hm.

Well, my mom is an actual influencer,

which is just embarrassing.

She took something she was good at

and turned it into a job. I think that's cool.

I guess.

Oh, shit. Your house has a baby house.

That's sick.

I'm obsessed with this dip. I'm sorry.

- It's so good. - Yeah, you and the rest of the internet!

Everything I say here is anonymous, right?

- I'm sorry? - Meaning, anything I say

is confidential because of HIPAA, right?

Oh. That doesn't really apply here.

Then a completely hypothetical question:

What would you do if you found out something

that'd break your friend's heart?

Would you tell them or would you keep it from them

so that they could stay happy?

And this hypothetical "thing"

is that the husband cheated on the wife...

Oh. Pfft.

Yeah, that's-- I don't--

And the husband's dead.

- Dead... Wow. - I should say that.

- Sorry. Keep going. - Well...

- I think I would tell them. - But that would ruin their life.

Oh, yeah. So, maybe don't tell them?

- Mm, that's betrayal. - Oh.

Well, you can tell someone else?

That's what I'm doing right now.

I don't know.

Yeah. Sorry. Sorry. Yeah, sorry.

I think those are for your eyes.

I'm pretending they're Cool Ranch Doritos.

Hm.

What did you and Holly fight about?

We didn't fight. We just had a discussion...

between adult friends who have history, you know.

No, I don't know.

Hollis has a whole other life with you.

Tatum, look, I know things between us

are a little weirdly territorial?

But I don't not like you.

Yeah, well, after all that stuff at the wedding...

What stuff happened at the wedding?

I meant this weekend.

Things are weird because of what happened at the wedding.

- Seriously, you don't remember? - No. What happened?

Nothing, it's not worth it. We're good.

Miss Jones?

- We're good? - Yeah.

Okay.

All right.

I was looking for you.

You gotta come see these lights.

I was hoping we could talk.

Beautiful.

These, these...

Yeah.

This is a different high than high school high.

So mellow... Yeah. Cowabunga.

This room...

I think it's like a womb. Warm and safe.

We grew inside our mothers and then we became mothers.

Am I saying the word wrong? "Mother"?

- No. Mother. - No?

No, you're doing it right.

- Mother, good. - Yeah.

- Um... I have to-- - Brooke.

Do you feel like we know each other?

Like, really know each other?

I mean, you know, I feel like as moms, you know, and...

Then I feel like when everything happened with Electra,

- I feel like we got closer. - Mm-hm.

And, um...

when you called me about Matthew...

I think this is gonna sound weird, but--

It won't, we're really high.

Yeah, we're high.

- I felt honored... - Yeah?

...that you trusted me to be there with you.

I felt like we were starting to become real friends?

I want to be.

- You do? - Mm-hm.

Me too.

Let's get naked.

I'm just gonna focus on your face for a moment.

It's such an important place.

When does the massage portion happen?

I slept on my neck weird.

We'll get there. Any health concerns?

Just my neck.

Stupid.

Dru-Ann Jones.

This is Lauren Armstrong from NBC Sports.

I'm calling for comment about what Posey Woodford posted

about in her stories and her dropping you as an agent.

- What? - Is this news to you?

'Cause we're going to have--

Can you go harder?

Take a deep breath for me.

Our bodies hold all of our anxiety,

and stress, and sadness...

And what I wanna do here today

is just show your body some love.

Remind it that it's healthy, it's strong,

that it can carry you through this world.

You can trust it.

Male Masseuse: Too hard?

No. It's not hard enough.

Female Masseuse: Take another breath for me.

My flight wasn't delayed.

I canceled it.

So I could see you.

This isn't my new route.

I changed my schedule so I could see you.

- You okay? - Yeah.

I don't believe you.

I don't wanna be someone who falls for a married man.

I'm terrified.

I don't wanna stop.

Hello?

The door's stuck. Hello?

- I can't breathe! - I'm here! I'm here!

I'm right here. I'm right here.

Oh, my God.

Hey, you're okay. You're okay.

- Okay, no, no... - No, seriously...

I had to call Poison Control Center for dogs,

and I had to say, "My dog ate a bottle of lube."

And his next poop just, like, slid right out.

Wow.

- Kind of amazing. - Yeah.

I have never told anyone that story

'cause I just...

felt embarrassed that I had lube.

- Lube. Lube. - Lube.

Are you sure you don't wanna get in?

I'm good. I'm good right here. And I can't get my bangs wet.

- Yeah. - It's a whole thing.

Mm.

This water feels so good.

Charlie gets massages.

Mm-hm.

With an ending?

Of happiness?

I've never told anybody that.

I'm glad you did.

I mean, I know he wouldn't need to do that

if I could just, you know, be more...

- Or maybe less... - Wait, no, Brooke, no.

- No? - This is not your fault.

- Right. - No, that's on him.

Not about you.

Yeah. Yeah.

Do you think Matthew ever, um, you know...?

With other women, or...?

No. No.

Yeah, sometimes you...

You just don't know.

How do you mean?

I think Charlie was inappropriate with an intern.

And I have to defend him on Tuesday.

Oh, my God, I am so sorry.

I had no idea you were going through that.

You were going through so much worse.

No. No, Brooke.

We are both dealing with a lot.

Oh God, will you not tell anybody about the deposition?

- No! - If Electra found out,

I don't know, she would destroy me.

No, what?

Why would I tell Electra? I would never.

She is not my friend. You're my friend, Brooke.

You are.

Not Electra Undergrove. Gross.

She's gross.

There she is!

Whee!

Oh, my gosh.

Should I get bangs?

- Mrs. Undergrove? - Yes, that's me.

I have you for a 3:00 p.m. facial.

Wonderful.

Your bangs, they look so good on you.

I think my forehead is getting longer?

Is that possible?

Maybe with age?

This view is amazing.

Okay, your grandma was like my mom's surrogate mom

after her mom died?

Yeah, she basically adopted her like a second daughter.

She taught her how to cook.

So, actually, I think your mom lowkey

owes my family like millions of dollars.

My mom's mom passed away when she was little.

And then your mom's mom passed away.

And when I was little, her dad passed away.

Now she's lost my dad.

She's lost everybody but me.

Oh, my God, it's happening to you.

- What is? - Mom empathy.

It's contagious and completely irreversible.

Oh, my God, Dylan.

The diapers are where the diapers always are.

Do you think you guys are gonna get married?

I don't know.

Um...

He used to be my favorite person.

And now sometimes I wonder if he's just the person

who gave me my favorite person?

Sometimes I think I'm with him

because it's what my parents want.

Yeah. Sometimes I think that about pre-med.

Yeah.

I'm failing out.

- Shit, really? - Yeah.

After my dad died and I went back to school,

I just couldn't go.

I just couldn't go to class.

It's like those dreams where you remember you have a big test,

but you haven't been to school in, like, five years.

Except it's real.

It's all just a bad dream.

And I can't wake up.

- What? - You're awake.

You're here.

Yeah.

Okay.

- Oh. Thank you. - Here you go. Yes.

Sorry.

I think I spa-ed too hard.

If that's even a verb.

Mm-hm. It is. I've been there.

Mm.

This is a nice break, you know?

I mean, Brooke, she's so...

Brooke.

I mean, I love her. I really do, but...

- Mm. - Sometimes...

Tatum's a lot too.

You know, she's great.

- You know, like... - No, please say more. Don't...

Don't leave me out here to bitch alone.

Like, come on, we get it.

You and your husband have a lot of eye-contact sex, congrats.

So true. I'm like, enough already.

I usually avoid big groups of women.

Yeah, me too. I grew up with three brothers, so...

whenever I'm around a bunch of ladies,

I feel like I'm in a tampon commercial.

I am a lone wolf.

I'm an angler fish.

A what?

- Angler fish. - Wait.

They're these fish that live at the bottom of the ocean.

They produce their own light.

I saw a picture of one once,

and I have never felt more seen.

Dru-Ann: Ah!

- Wait. This is you? - Mm-hm.

See?

Oh, that is not what I was expecting.

Are you gonna tell me what's really going on with you?

You were right.

This is an intense situation for me.

How so?

I recently had a relationship end.

And this is the first social thing I've done since.

And I want to be there for Hollis,

but I'm kind of having trouble compartmentalizing.

I get it.

I might never work again.

You know, all because of one

tiny, stupid thing I said.

And it's all I can think about.

Life doesn't stop, does it?

Unless you're Matthew.

- Oh, God. - That is so...

What is wrong with me?

Hey. How was your service?

- It was really nice. - Okay.

Look, I wanna pay for all of our treatments,

but before my friend Hollis sees, so use this.

- Actually... - Wait, no. This one. For points.

The bill's already been settled.

Did Hollis prepay?

No, another one of your party. Mrs. Jones? Ms. Jones? Dru-Ann.

Thanks.

Hey, everybody. So...

Dru-Ann paid for all of our treatments,

don't forget to thank her.

How dare you! I told you this was my treat.

I know, well, I got there first. So, I won the spa.

Mwah-ha-ha-ha-ha!

God, I think I might really be high now. Finally.

So nice. So generous.

- Is there a problem? - No.

Well, hello there, stars.

Oh, my God. No.

Electra?

Um...

- Hi. - Hi.

Oh.

I'm sorry, this is such a wild coincidence.

It's not a coincidence at all, mama.

Brooke gave me the entire itinerary

on the ferry yesterday. You didn't tell her?

I didn't give it to her, she stole it from me.

Who is this person? Are you a fan?

Electra Undergrove. I'm a close friend of Hollis's.

Oh, my God, you're such a liar.

You are not friends with Hollis anymore. You know that.

We co-chaired the Wellesley Women's Children's

Wellness Fundraiser together last year.

Did you not know that?

You co-chaired?

Yes, but--

We spent the entire fall together planning.

She even came to a few Rock and Roll Footballs.

Guess you're not as close as you thought.

Electra, it was so good to see you.

Thanks for saying hi.

Well, maybe I'll see you girls around.

Have we met before?

- Me? - Yeah.

I feel certain I'd remember.

Huh.

Well...

Hm-hm-hm.

My God. The only thing that's missing

is her coat made of puppies.

Can we have a minute, please?

Oh. Yeah. We'll meet you at the car.

You just told me you guys weren't friends anymore.

You lied.

Yes, but, Brooke, that woman

is so terrifying and unpredictable,

I didn't want there to be a problem,

so I've just been kind to her to keep the peace.

I'm sorry.

I-- God, I'm high.

Well, I'm not.

Oh.

Okay.

Wow!

You guys look nice. Very airbrushed.

Do you maybe want some golden hour group pics on the bluff?

Thank you.

What's the big deal?

She paid for your massage. It's just money.

It's not just money.

It's about...

legacy.

How is it about legacy?

Okay, it's about integrity.

Now you're just saying words.

What if you write about it?

In your own personalized journal.

- Heh. - I know what this is about, Mom.

This is you not wanting Dru-Ann to think you're trash.

At the end of your life, you don't wanna owe anyone anything.

Okay? You don't wanna be beholden to anyone.

You wanna mind your damn business

and take care of your people.

You hear me?

I am taking care of my people.

You know what? I'm over it. I can be the bigger person.

Okay. No, I can't. I'm angry.

I'm an angry little person.

Done.

She's fucking crazy.

- What are you doing? - I'm leaving.

- No, Brooke, don't. Don't leave. - God--

God, I felt so special when you invited me to this weekend.

- That's so sad. - Listen, Brooke,

all that Electra stuff, it was not a big deal.

It's not just "stuff" to me.

Heh. God, it's been like this my whole life.

I'm never enough, I'm never in on the joke...

I'm so sorry, Brooke. I didn't know you felt that way.

But you did.

I really don't wanna go home.

God, I don't wanna deal with Charlie.

I just needed this weekend for myself.

And I already know what I wanna order at Cru.

- Oh. - That lobster pot pie

looks amazing.

Fine, I'm staying.

But I'm still mad at you.

Okay.

Nice move with Venmo.

What is your problem with me?

You still think I'm cheap trash. With Payless shoes.

Wait, what?

Holly's wedding? We all had to wear those cream-colored shoes?

I wasn't about to spend a couple hundred bucks

on a pair I'd only wear once.

My heel broke at the reception

and I heard you tell all the bridesmaids,

"That's what you get when you buy your shoes at Payless."

I'm sorry, that is what you get

if you buy your shoes at Payless.

And then you made a big deal

about how you took Holly on a trip as a wedding present,

- stayed at some fancy hotel... - All right, look, Tatum,

I'm not gonna apologize for making money.

All right? I work hard.

So do I.

Look, I don't care about your money. I have money too.

I don't need to make a big deal about it. I'm happy, goddammit.

I like my life. I love it.

And it's probably too late now anyway.

- Too late for what? - Never mind.

Sorry, I was just testing the light.

You look like him.

Your dad.

I guess I saw a lot of his face in your mom's videos.

- Right. - Sorry, I just, you know...

- You're gorgeous. - So are you.

Picture time. Okay.

Where do you want us, Goose? This is perfect.

Tatum and Dru, can you guys get closer together?

And Brooke, go next to Gigi. And you go in the middle.

Tell her, don't tell her. Do what you want.

- I don't care. - Okay.

Thank you for doing this.

So many freaking pictures.

All right, or don't. That's fine. Um-- Okay.

Look like you like each other. And smile.

♪ Shake it out, shake it out ♪

♪ Shake it out, shake it out Whoa! ♪

♪ Shake it out, shake it out ♪

♪ Shake it out, shake it out Whoa! ♪

♪ And it's hard to dance With a devil on your back ♪

Perfect. We got it.

♪ Whoa ♪

I...

♪ Shake it out ♪

♪ And given half the chance Would I take any of it back? ♪

♪ It's a fine romance But it's left me so undone ♪

♪ It's always darkest Before the dawn ♪

♪ Whoa ♪

♪ Oh, whoa ♪