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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:01:02,729 --> 00:01:03,981 Time. 2 00:01:05,357 --> 00:01:09,611 Time, it has been proposed, is the fourth dimension. 3 00:01:10,112 --> 00:01:15,158 Una' yet, for mortal man, time has no dimension at all. 4 00:01:15,242 --> 00:01:19,955 We are like horses with blinders, seeing only what lies before us. 5 00:01:20,038 --> 00:01:21,707 Hear, hear! 6 00:01:21,790 --> 00:01:24,459 Forever guessing the future... 7 00:01:25,168 --> 00:01:27,129 und fabricating the past. 8 00:01:27,212 --> 00:01:29,089 It's him. 9 00:01:29,172 --> 00:01:31,800 - Brilliant. - Quite right, Your Grace. 10 00:01:31,883 --> 00:01:36,054 How, you ask, can we lift these shackles... 11 00:01:36,138 --> 00:01:41,685 und live not in the moment but in the glorious expanse of time's continuum? 12 00:01:45,105 --> 00:01:47,649 Listen, und I shall tell you. 13 00:01:49,234 --> 00:01:53,947 The secret lies in the enduring power of our achievements. 14 00:01:54,031 --> 00:01:56,658 - Yes! - Our creations! 15 00:01:59,161 --> 00:02:02,581 As the pyramids testify to the Egyptians... 16 00:02:02,664 --> 00:02:04,875 so my glorious erection... 17 00:02:04,958 --> 00:02:09,338 shall represent our culture in perpetuity. 18 00:02:09,421 --> 00:02:12,633 Behold, rising before you... 19 00:02:12,716 --> 00:02:15,177 the greatest erection on the continent. 20 00:02:16,678 --> 00:02:18,847 The greatest erection of the age. 21 00:02:20,766 --> 00:02:23,518 The greatest erection on the planet! 22 00:02:30,108 --> 00:02:31,610 Hold this. 23 00:02:31,693 --> 00:02:33,403 Of course, sire. 24 00:02:40,369 --> 00:02:43,997 For the Hera/of Your Grace. I understand you'll be making an important announcement tonight. 25 00:02:50,962 --> 00:02:53,757 Good afternoon, ladies. Please, excuse me. Please. 26 00:02:53,840 --> 00:02:55,550 Good afternoon. 27 00:03:14,778 --> 00:03:18,824 And the Perrier-jouet should be chilled. You understand? Chilled. Leopold! 28 00:03:18,907 --> 00:03:21,159 Leopold, where have you been? 29 00:03:21,243 --> 00:03:22,911 Leopold! 30 00:03:22,994 --> 00:03:24,871 Otis, I demand explication. 31 00:03:24,955 --> 00:03:27,290 It's half past 5:00. He's not even dressed. 32 00:03:27,374 --> 00:03:28,917 He'll be ready, my lord. I assure you. 33 00:03:29,000 --> 00:03:31,670 I don't want him ready. I want him resplendent! 34 00:03:32,921 --> 00:03:35,006 Miss Blaine. 35 00:03:35,090 --> 00:03:38,760 You dance like a herd of cattle. 36 00:03:39,469 --> 00:03:41,346 You are a rare woman... 37 00:03:41,430 --> 00:03:42,889 who lights up a room... 38 00:03:42,973 --> 00:03:44,599 simply by leaving it. 39 00:03:45,600 --> 00:03:47,227 Might you be rich, Miss Blaine? 40 00:03:47,310 --> 00:03:50,021 You see, whilst I am the third duke... 41 00:03:50,105 --> 00:03:52,357 the little secret of those of us in the royal court... 42 00:03:52,441 --> 00:03:56,445 apart from our general uselessness, is our massive indebtedness. 43 00:03:56,528 --> 00:03:58,864 It's always been your misfortune, Leopold... 44 00:03:58,947 --> 00:04:02,951 that you so thoroughly amuse yourself with the sound of your own voice. 45 00:04:03,452 --> 00:04:07,789 In a life as stagnant as mine, that I can amuse myself at all is an evolutionary marvel. 46 00:04:15,756 --> 00:04:18,383 - Please don't touch that. - The device you were jabbering about- 47 00:04:18,467 --> 00:04:21,011 to take priests to the bell tower. 48 00:04:21,094 --> 00:04:23,638 To take anyone, Uncle, to the floor they so desire. 49 00:04:23,722 --> 00:04:27,184 Buildings continue to climb. Soon they will outstrip the stamina of our legs. 50 00:04:28,268 --> 00:04:30,771 You speak of progress and invention... 51 00:04:30,854 --> 00:04:33,690 yet what I offer you downstairs is reality. 52 00:04:34,357 --> 00:04:36,735 Take a wife. Marry. 53 00:04:36,818 --> 00:04:38,320 Marriage. 54 00:04:38,904 --> 00:04:41,072 Marriage is the promise of eternal love. 55 00:04:41,156 --> 00:04:44,701 As a man of honor I cannot promise eternally what I've never felt momentarily. 56 00:04:46,077 --> 00:04:48,997 Born into privilege, yet perversely ashamed of it. 57 00:04:49,080 --> 00:04:50,665 That is your tragedy. 58 00:04:50,749 --> 00:04:53,502 My God, if my brother could only see you, he'd be heartbroken. 59 00:04:53,585 --> 00:04:56,546 - You are no duke. - Of course I'm not. 60 00:04:56,630 --> 00:04:59,299 The monarchy is dead, Uncle. We are relics. That is reality. 61 00:04:59,382 --> 00:05:02,385 The new royals are men of accomplishment- men like Roebling with his bridge... 62 00:05:02,469 --> 00:05:06,097 Edison with his lamp, Diesel, Bell, Westinghouse. 63 00:05:07,557 --> 00:05:10,101 Those men made themselves from nothing! 64 00:05:10,185 --> 00:05:12,896 You, on the other hand, were born with everything... 65 00:05:12,979 --> 00:05:15,482 and from it, fashioned nothing. 66 00:05:16,733 --> 00:05:18,777 As of tonight... 67 00:05:18,860 --> 00:05:20,821 I wash my hands of you. 68 00:05:22,906 --> 00:05:25,492 Take a good look at your dance card, Leopold. 69 00:05:25,575 --> 00:05:28,745 A wealthy bride is your only surety. 70 00:05:41,007 --> 00:05:42,592 Jones 71 00:05:48,390 --> 00:05:54,271 Your Grace, may I present Miss Tree of the Trees of Schenectady, sir? 72 00:05:56,273 --> 00:05:57,774 Miss Tree. 73 00:06:02,737 --> 00:06:06,533 It's an honor to be making your royal acquaintance, Your Highness. 74 00:06:12,831 --> 00:06:14,749 Shall we? 75 00:06:35,520 --> 00:06:39,941 I've never been to England, but Father's teeth were made there. 76 00:06:40,442 --> 00:06:42,485 He's quite rich, your father? 77 00:06:42,569 --> 00:06:44,112 Oh, yes. 78 00:07:33,828 --> 00:07:35,830 Many dreams, all useless. 79 00:07:50,553 --> 00:07:52,347 Who are you? 80 00:07:57,435 --> 00:07:58,937 No, no, no. 81 00:07:59,020 --> 00:08:01,856 Look here. Really. Please. Wait. No. 82 00:08:01,940 --> 00:08:04,359 I don't want to harm you. Stop. Please. 83 00:08:04,442 --> 00:08:07,779 - Sir? - Wait, wait. Please. Stop! Please! 84 00:08:10,865 --> 00:08:12,367 ' Stop! ' LQOPOId! 85 00:08:15,829 --> 00:08:17,747 Pardon me. Pardon me. 86 00:08:19,874 --> 00:08:21,751 Go! Go! 87 00:09:36,076 --> 00:09:37,786 Stop, sir! Please! 88 00:09:54,010 --> 00:09:55,303 Oh, my God. 89 00:10:09,359 --> 00:10:10,860 No! 90 00:10:13,321 --> 00:10:15,031 Let go. 91 00:10:15,115 --> 00:10:17,408 Just let go. it's okay. 92 00:10:18,326 --> 00:10:20,161 You don't understand. Let go! 93 00:10:23,915 --> 00:10:24,916 Don't! 94 00:10:24,999 --> 00:10:27,168 Look. I don't want to hurt you. 95 00:10:27,252 --> 00:10:29,337 - Let go. - Look- 96 00:10:42,183 --> 00:10:43,560 Beth. 97 00:10:44,144 --> 00:10:45,562 What? 98 00:10:46,771 --> 00:10:48,356 I'm sorry. 99 00:10:48,439 --> 00:10:50,358 Yeah, well, you should be. 100 00:10:51,568 --> 00:10:53,528 It's just... 101 00:10:54,362 --> 00:10:57,991 if a guy like that can get a girl like you, what's left for a guy like me? 102 00:10:59,117 --> 00:11:01,911 A guy like that can get a girl like me. 103 00:11:01,995 --> 00:11:04,622 But a girl like me will never love him. 104 00:11:04,706 --> 00:11:08,001 - Are you saying you love me? - It's possible. 105 00:11:23,975 --> 00:11:25,894 Turn it up higher. 106 00:11:25,977 --> 00:11:28,062 Just more. Turn it up higher. 107 00:11:31,191 --> 00:11:32,901 I've never felt so happy. 108 00:11:47,790 --> 00:11:50,752 If you don't know what to write, you can just leave it blank, okay? 109 00:11:50,835 --> 00:11:53,338 It's really just about what you're feeling. All right? 110 00:11:54,589 --> 00:11:58,301 Okay, guy in the Windbreaker right there. Two ladies right in front of him. 111 00:11:58,384 --> 00:12:01,346 I don't know. We're doing the cards now. We'll have the numbers in about half an hour. 112 00:12:01,429 --> 00:12:02,388 - Hey. - Bye. 113 00:12:02,472 --> 00:12:05,850 - How do you think it went? - If I had to guess, mid-60s, Barry. 114 00:12:07,560 --> 00:12:09,854 - Why don't they love it? - She's not likable. 115 00:12:09,938 --> 00:12:10,939 - She's right. - Absolutely. 116 00:12:11,022 --> 00:12:13,483 - We should trim where she sleeps with her boss. - Cut that whole section. 117 00:12:13,566 --> 00:12:14,567 - Reshoot. - Reshoot. 118 00:12:14,651 --> 00:12:17,195 Excuse me. What are you talking about? 119 00:12:17,278 --> 00:12:19,072 The movie, Richard. Your movie. 120 00:12:19,155 --> 00:12:21,241 I'm aware of that. Look. I want to say something. 121 00:12:21,324 --> 00:12:25,370 I thinkjulie is likable- very likable in this picture. And real. 122 00:12:25,453 --> 00:12:27,872 Excuse me. You've never made a mistake in your life? 123 00:12:27,956 --> 00:12:30,541 You have no flaws? You've never slept with the wrong guy? 124 00:12:30,625 --> 00:12:33,419 I'm not the protagonist in a major motion picture. 125 00:12:33,503 --> 00:12:35,463 Let me tell you something. You people, with your tests... 126 00:12:35,546 --> 00:12:37,590 you are sucking the life out of American cinema. 127 00:12:37,674 --> 00:12:39,175 Richard, come on. 128 00:12:39,259 --> 00:12:42,804 It's a comedy, but it's also a drama. It can be about something! 129 00:12:46,015 --> 00:12:49,102 “You people are sucking the life out of American cinema.” 130 00:12:49,978 --> 00:12:52,730 “You people are sucking the life out of American cinema”? 131 00:12:52,814 --> 00:12:55,525 - You think he's got a point though? - What? 132 00:12:56,985 --> 00:13:00,488 Don't you ever think that what we do is a bit crass, cold? 133 00:13:00,571 --> 00:13:05,159 Darci, we find out what regular people think, and we pass on their wisdom. 134 00:13:05,243 --> 00:13:08,746 That's what we do. Is that crass? Is that cold? I don't think so. 135 00:13:08,830 --> 00:13:12,083 We make peanut butter creamier. We make cereal crunchier... 136 00:13:12,166 --> 00:13:14,377 sitcoms funnier, boring movies shorter. 137 00:13:14,460 --> 00:13:16,754 We made Smucker's get the seeds out oftheirjam. 138 00:13:16,838 --> 00:13:19,424 We did that. If you ask me, we're heroes. 139 00:13:19,507 --> 00:13:22,051 Guess it just goes with the territory that every once in a while... 140 00:13:22,135 --> 00:13:24,887 some pompousjerk sticks his head out of his cave and says... 141 00:13:24,971 --> 00:13:28,057 “Hey, I like seeds in myjam. Without seeds, it's just jelly. 142 00:13:28,141 --> 00:13:30,393 You people are sucking the life out of my condiments.” 143 00:13:30,476 --> 00:13:33,062 You know what I say to him? This is what I say, Darci. 144 00:13:33,146 --> 00:13:36,524 You- Baby, you are one percent of one percent. 145 00:13:36,607 --> 00:13:41,154 Your opinion is irrelevant. I went out with a visionary like you for four years... 146 00:13:41,237 --> 00:13:43,156 and I had to pay his rent... 147 00:13:43,239 --> 00:13:46,409 because he couldn't stoop down and get a job like the rest of us? 148 00:13:46,492 --> 00:13:48,411 - He couldn't even do that? - Kate, this is not about Stuart. 149 00:13:48,494 --> 00:13:52,957 Yes, it is! It is about Stuart. It's about anybody who can't face up to reality. 150 00:13:53,041 --> 00:13:55,293 I don't care if it's crass. just give me the numbers. 151 00:13:55,376 --> 00:13:59,088 Give me the bottom line. Give me the truth, straight up, no chaser. 152 00:14:11,559 --> 00:14:13,102 What the- 153 00:14:25,948 --> 00:14:27,241 Oh, no. 154 00:15:03,277 --> 00:15:04,737 Quiet! 155 00:15:15,748 --> 00:15:16,916 Shit. 156 00:15:17,583 --> 00:15:18,793 Ow. 157 00:15:26,592 --> 00:15:28,970 Oh, my God! 158 00:15:40,857 --> 00:15:44,694 We must remember, Bart, that sometimes... 159 00:15:44,777 --> 00:15:47,113 it is okay to color outside the lines. 160 00:15:55,329 --> 00:15:58,291 - Hello? - My PalmPilot- you still have it. 161 00:15:58,374 --> 00:16:00,501 Kate, it's 1:00 in the morning. 162 00:16:00,585 --> 00:16:03,004 And clearly you're awake, so what is the infraction? 163 00:16:03,087 --> 00:16:07,675 Kate, I don't know where your PalmPilot is, and I can't do this now. I'm expecting a call. 164 00:16:26,027 --> 00:16:27,778 Oh, Bart. 165 00:16:27,862 --> 00:16:29,822 I'm sorry, baby. 166 00:16:30,490 --> 00:16:32,700 She is not a happy person. 167 00:16:38,122 --> 00:16:40,208 Goddamn it! 168 00:16:45,171 --> 00:16:47,089 - You know what, Stuart? - Kate. 169 00:16:47,173 --> 00:16:50,760 - Stuart- - Please. I've got somebody here, okay? 170 00:16:50,843 --> 00:16:53,387 - I know. I saw her. - No, you d/dn': 171 00:16:53,471 --> 00:16:57,308 - Yes, I did! - /z"5 a hi/n, ifthatk any consolation to you. 172 00:16:57,391 --> 00:17:00,686 Look. Now that you know I'm not getting laid, just go to bed, okay? 173 00:17:00,770 --> 00:17:03,648 Do not hang up on me, Stuart. Don't do that. 174 00:17:04,148 --> 00:17:05,650 Kate. 175 00:17:05,733 --> 00:17:10,404 Please, I beg of you, something big is happening. 176 00:17:10,488 --> 00:17:14,200 Something... that validates my entire life. 177 00:17:14,283 --> 00:17:17,286 Something that validates your entire life? What could that possibly be? 178 00:17:17,370 --> 00:17:19,121 Are you sitting down? 179 00:17:19,205 --> 00:17:21,290 - Ye& - No, you're not. 180 00:17:21,374 --> 00:17:23,251 - Yes, I am. - No, you're not. 181 00:17:26,379 --> 00:17:27,380 Okay. 182 00:17:30,591 --> 00:17:32,343 I found it. 183 00:17:32,426 --> 00:17:34,887 - What did you find? - The portal. 184 00:17:35,930 --> 00:17:38,933 A crack in the fabric of time. 185 00:17:39,016 --> 00:17:41,394 It was over the East River, just where I said it would be. 186 00:17:41,477 --> 00:17:45,690 - You found the portal? - A portal into April 28, 7876. 187 00:17:45,773 --> 00:17:52,530 ljumped off the Brooklyn Bridge and took a walk in 1876 today. 188 00:17:52,613 --> 00:17:57,618 I followed my great-great-grandpa around old New York. 189 00:17:58,160 --> 00:18:00,037 - Are you listening? - Avidly. 190 00:18:00,121 --> 00:18:03,040 'Cause here's the twist, Kate. Here's the kicker. 191 00:18:03,124 --> 00:18:05,084 What's the kicker? 192 00:18:05,751 --> 00:18:07,920 He followed me home. 193 00:18:08,004 --> 00:18:09,964 - Your great-great-grandfather? - Yes! 194 00:18:10,047 --> 00:18:12,091 - The viscount of Buffalo. - No, he's nota Viscount. He's a duke. 195 00:18:12,174 --> 00:18:14,760 - Viscount- duke of Buffalo. - No, no. The duke ofA/bany. 196 00:18:14,844 --> 00:18:17,847 - Albany in Eng/and - Followed you home through a crack in time. 197 00:18:17,930 --> 00:18:19,974 He's a brilliant engineer. He patented the counterweight pulley. 198 00:18:20,057 --> 00:18:23,227 - He invented the elevator, for Christ sakes. - You know what, Stuart? 199 00:18:23,311 --> 00:18:26,731 I'm not your girlfriend anymore. I haven't been for a whole month now. 200 00:18:26,814 --> 00:18:29,900 - You can tell me the truth. - lam telling you the truth. 201 00:18:29,984 --> 00:18:34,780 You can tell me you went and picked up a transvestite in Times Square. I don't care. 202 00:18:34,864 --> 00:18:37,199 You know what, Kate? This is it. Right here. 203 00:18:37,283 --> 00:18:39,910 This is it, in a nutshell. Our downfall. 204 00:18:39,994 --> 00:18:42,622 You never, not once, believed in me. 205 00:18:42,705 --> 00:18:47,209 I did, Stuart. I did, for four years, and I got burnt. 206 00:18:47,293 --> 00:18:49,003 Okay, you want to know who he is? 207 00:18:49,086 --> 00:18:55,760 I'll tell you who he is. He is a hacker. High-end. English. I know him from Columbia. 208 00:18:55,843 --> 00:18:59,221 He's in town for the Mac Expo at the javits. 209 00:18:59,305 --> 00:19:03,142 We went out, got a little sloppy on Guinness, and he passed out on my couch. 210 00:19:03,225 --> 00:19:06,729 - And that's the truth? - That's the truth. Okay? 211 00:19:06,812 --> 00:19:10,858 You happy now? Is that plausible enough for you and your little focus group? 212 00:19:12,026 --> 00:19:14,111 You know what, Stuart? 213 00:19:14,945 --> 00:19:17,198 I blew my best years on you. 214 00:19:17,990 --> 00:19:19,950 Those were your best? 215 00:19:26,207 --> 00:19:28,042 Look- 216 00:19:28,584 --> 00:19:30,336 I'm sorry. 217 00:19:30,419 --> 00:19:33,255 I have to go. You'll get your Pilot in the morning. 218 00:20:45,953 --> 00:20:47,413 Orange alert. 219 00:20:57,840 --> 00:21:00,134 Otis! Otis! 220 00:21:03,846 --> 00:21:05,139 Bart, no! 221 00:21:06,015 --> 00:21:07,433 - Otis! - It's okay. 222 00:21:11,020 --> 00:21:12,605 Quiet! Bart, stop. 223 00:21:15,900 --> 00:21:17,401 It's okay. 224 00:21:19,904 --> 00:21:21,822 - You! - It's okay. 225 00:21:21,906 --> 00:21:24,325 - Where am I? - Well... 226 00:21:24,408 --> 00:21:26,202 there's not an easy explanation for that. 227 00:21:26,285 --> 00:21:30,122 If it's a ransom you seek, my uncle won't pay a cent, except perhaps for my demise. 228 00:21:30,206 --> 00:21:32,750 No, you're not being kidnapped. Bart, quiet! 229 00:21:32,833 --> 00:21:34,835 I can scarcely see, thanks to your spray. 230 00:21:34,919 --> 00:21:39,381 My eyes feel like steak au poivre, so I ask you again, where the hell am I? 231 00:21:43,636 --> 00:21:45,846 I have no idea why I'm here- 232 00:21:49,350 --> 00:21:53,395 You do not tell me where I am, and as far as I'm concerned, you might bejack the Ripper! 233 00:21:53,479 --> 00:21:56,816 You would have me believe that I am being detained at present in the hereafter? 234 00:21:56,899 --> 00:21:58,692 - The time to come? - Yes. 235 00:21:58,776 --> 00:22:00,820 Bart, quiet! He needs a walk. 236 00:22:00,903 --> 00:22:05,324 And you would have me believe that you are my progeny, product of a marriage unmade! 237 00:22:05,407 --> 00:22:07,660 - Yes. - And you would have me believe... 238 00:22:07,743 --> 00:22:09,912 that you have found a crack in time! 239 00:22:09,995 --> 00:22:14,083 You of all people should understand. I mean, you're a scientist. You invented the elevator. 240 00:22:14,166 --> 00:22:17,461 What is an elevator? What the hell are you- Where the hell am I? 241 00:22:17,545 --> 00:22:20,548 I told you. You haven't actually gone anywhere. You're still in New York. 242 00:22:20,631 --> 00:22:23,050 That, sir, is not New York! 243 00:22:23,133 --> 00:22:24,760 I'm afraid it is. 244 00:22:26,053 --> 00:22:27,054 No, Kate. 245 00:22:27,137 --> 00:22:29,682 Hello. Hello there. What's your name? 246 00:22:29,765 --> 00:22:31,559 - Leopold. - Tell me something. 247 00:22:31,642 --> 00:22:37,398 I'm having trouble with my G5. How much RAM do I need to properly run OS 9.6? 248 00:22:38,691 --> 00:22:41,318 Clearly the Mac Expo is out. 249 00:22:41,402 --> 00:22:45,614 So you must be a man out of time- or Sergeant Pepper? 250 00:22:46,740 --> 00:22:49,493 - Actually, we could use a little privacy. - Stuart, I want my PalmPilot. 251 00:22:49,577 --> 00:22:52,830 - Maybe later on, Kate. - I'm serious! I just want my PalmPilot! 252 00:22:52,913 --> 00:22:54,498 - Stuart! - Okay. No. No. 253 00:22:54,582 --> 00:22:56,667 Give me my PalmPilot! Give it to me! 254 00:22:58,127 --> 00:23:00,880 This is madness. This is madness. Who was that? 255 00:23:00,963 --> 00:23:04,174 - I feel as if I've seen her. - Women have changed since your time, Leo. 256 00:23:04,258 --> 00:23:06,427 They've become dangerous. 257 00:23:07,469 --> 00:23:09,430 It's on the landing! 258 00:23:11,682 --> 00:23:14,685 You say this is no kidnapping. You say you mean no harm. 259 00:23:14,768 --> 00:23:17,771 Then why is it, sir, you will not unlock the door? 260 00:23:19,481 --> 00:23:22,318 I'm sorry. Okay? I'm sorry about her. 261 00:23:23,360 --> 00:23:25,154 Look. With all due respect... 262 00:23:25,237 --> 00:23:27,907 I can't let you just go running around free out there, okay? 263 00:23:27,990 --> 00:23:30,868 This is New York City. It's not just a safe place anymore. 264 00:23:30,951 --> 00:23:35,205 Look at you. You look like some sort of psychotic escapee from a Renaissance faire. 265 00:23:35,289 --> 00:23:39,209 I understand you have some anxiety, but you have to trust me. 266 00:23:39,293 --> 00:23:41,253 I'm gonna get you home, okay? 267 00:23:43,339 --> 00:23:45,090 I promise. 268 00:23:45,174 --> 00:23:46,800 Bart! 269 00:23:50,638 --> 00:23:52,556 The portal opens up again next week. Monday. 270 00:23:52,640 --> 00:23:55,517 I know that because it was my backup in case I didn't make it last night. 271 00:23:55,601 --> 00:23:58,938 It's on a cycle. Kind of like... total eclipse. 272 00:23:59,021 --> 00:24:00,773 Once every 2O years. You understand? 273 00:24:01,482 --> 00:24:04,944 Generally I understand everything. Since I've met you, nothing. 274 00:24:05,027 --> 00:24:09,490 I can only assume I'm in a nightmare brought on by agita, or else I am dead. 275 00:24:09,573 --> 00:24:11,283 You're not dead. 276 00:24:11,367 --> 00:24:13,327 Come here. Sit down. 277 00:24:13,911 --> 00:24:15,412 Here. 278 00:24:16,830 --> 00:24:18,666 Want some milk in yours? 279 00:24:20,125 --> 00:24:22,378 Bart, can I just have- 280 00:24:24,338 --> 00:24:27,174 Sorry. He's really gotta go out. 281 00:24:31,428 --> 00:24:32,930 Here. 282 00:24:34,390 --> 00:24:36,850 I'd be honored if you took a look at those. 283 00:24:36,934 --> 00:24:38,852 I'll explain everything when I get back. 284 00:24:38,936 --> 00:24:41,647 He's gotta go out, or he's gonna drop a bomb in there. 285 00:24:41,730 --> 00:24:45,275 Come on. Let's go. Go, go, go. That's it. 286 00:24:46,944 --> 00:24:49,071 Back in five. 287 00:24:56,286 --> 00:24:58,622 One quick trip to Spectra, Bart... 288 00:24:58,706 --> 00:25:02,167 and you and I will be Nobel... 289 00:25:02,251 --> 00:25:04,211 laureates. 290 00:25:11,010 --> 00:25:12,720 Come on, Bart. 291 00:25:12,803 --> 00:25:14,471 Hey. Let's go. 292 00:25:14,555 --> 00:25:16,181 Come on. Let's go. 293 00:25:25,065 --> 00:25:26,650 Jesus. 294 00:25:30,237 --> 00:25:32,948 Good boy, Bart. Stay. 295 00:25:33,657 --> 00:25:36,243 Stay right- Stay. 296 00:25:38,203 --> 00:25:40,205 Bart, please stay! 297 00:26:17,785 --> 00:26:20,996 Stuart, you forgot the pointy thing! 298 00:26:23,415 --> 00:26:24,416 Stuart. 299 00:26:37,096 --> 00:26:40,808 Look. This is not complex. He gave me the PalmPilot, but he forgot the pointy thing. 300 00:26:40,891 --> 00:26:43,393 - I've been warned about you. - Really? 301 00:26:43,477 --> 00:26:45,813 And what, pray tell, did the great disappointment say? 302 00:26:45,896 --> 00:26:48,065 That you were dangerous. Though you hardly look it. 303 00:26:48,148 --> 00:26:50,734 - Really? - A lady in trousers isn't dangerous, merely plain. 304 00:26:50,818 --> 00:26:53,237 - I take it you're a career woman. - Yeah, market research. 305 00:26:53,320 --> 00:26:55,989 Fine avocation for women- research. 306 00:26:56,073 --> 00:26:58,117 Perfect for the feminine mind. 307 00:27:00,828 --> 00:27:02,496 You're a trip, Lionel. 308 00:27:07,709 --> 00:27:10,629 I myself once courted a librarian in Sussex. 309 00:27:14,091 --> 00:27:16,009 Good for you. 310 00:27:18,345 --> 00:27:21,640 I must confess, I feel as though we've met on a previous occasion. 311 00:27:21,723 --> 00:27:25,394 Lionel, seeing as I've never met a single friend of Stuart's... 312 00:27:25,477 --> 00:27:27,396 and I'm not even sure he's ever had any... 313 00:27:27,479 --> 00:27:29,857 I really don't see how that's possible. 314 00:27:32,442 --> 00:27:34,695 Oh, man! Bart! 315 00:27:35,571 --> 00:27:37,447 He just made Lake Erie out there. 316 00:27:37,531 --> 00:27:40,868 You just can't toss a dog out into the hall like that. You can't do that! 317 00:27:40,951 --> 00:27:42,494 I assure you I did not. 318 00:27:44,329 --> 00:27:46,623 - Let's go. - I beg your pardon? 319 00:27:46,707 --> 00:27:48,208 Come on. Let's go. 320 00:27:50,127 --> 00:27:51,253 Bart. 321 00:27:53,463 --> 00:27:57,092 Look, pal. I don't care how many elevators you got. This one's in my building. 322 00:27:57,176 --> 00:27:58,927 Hang on a second. 323 00:27:59,553 --> 00:28:02,181 Sorry about the elevator, Miss McKay. I got 'em on the phone right now. 324 00:28:02,264 --> 00:28:04,766 Hey, Gracy. This is Lionel, Stuart's friend. 325 00:28:04,850 --> 00:28:06,310 - How do you do? - Hey. 326 00:28:06,393 --> 00:28:08,353 Ten minutes. I need someone here right now. 327 00:28:39,134 --> 00:28:40,928 - Watch it, man. - I do beg your pardon. 328 00:28:41,011 --> 00:28:45,015 Hey. What are you doing? You need to be going that way. Hello? 329 00:28:45,098 --> 00:28:48,101 - Hello? There's an electronics store. Hello. - I'm sorry. Yes. 330 00:28:48,185 --> 00:28:51,897 There's a patch of grass across the street. Take him there. He'll do his business. 331 00:28:51,980 --> 00:28:54,608 Can you give this to Stuart, please? It's his cable bill. 332 00:29:09,539 --> 00:29:13,919 They haul our furniture and cradle our children, but this morning, from the Battery to the Bronx... 333 00:29:14,002 --> 00:29:15,754 elevators have mysteriously- 334 00:29:15,837 --> 00:29:18,590 Elevator company mechanics- 335 00:29:29,101 --> 00:29:30,727 - So sorry. - Stupid! 336 00:29:30,811 --> 00:29:32,479 I do beg your pardon. 337 00:29:38,610 --> 00:29:40,279 I beg your pardon! 338 00:29:48,704 --> 00:29:50,664 Are you gonna remove that? 339 00:29:52,833 --> 00:29:56,503 - I beg your pardon? - Pick it up and put it in the trash. 340 00:29:59,506 --> 00:30:00,507 Absolutely not. 341 00:30:02,801 --> 00:30:04,720 Maybe you don't understand. 342 00:30:04,803 --> 00:30:06,722 It's against the law to leave it there. 343 00:30:08,015 --> 00:30:09,975 Are you suggesting, madam, there exists a law... 344 00:30:10,058 --> 00:30:12,561 compelling gentlemen to lay hold of canine bowel movements? 345 00:30:12,644 --> 00:30:15,981 I'm suggesting you pick the poop up and throw it away now. 346 00:30:18,150 --> 00:30:20,152 I refuse, respectfully. 347 00:30:22,738 --> 00:30:25,907 All right. What's your name, fancy pants? 348 00:30:25,991 --> 00:30:26,992 Leopold. 349 00:30:27,075 --> 00:30:29,828 Alexis Elijah... 350 00:30:29,911 --> 00:30:33,373 Walker Thomas Gareth Mountbatten. 351 00:30:37,753 --> 00:30:40,005 All right, Stuart. 352 00:30:41,048 --> 00:30:43,008 Have a nice day. 353 00:30:47,262 --> 00:30:50,932 I appreciate you putting in a good word for me, butj.j.'s not back from London. 354 00:30:51,016 --> 00:30:53,560 - Camden Research. - Right. No. Right. 355 00:30:53,643 --> 00:30:55,937 - What's with the elevators? - Happening everywhere. 356 00:30:56,521 --> 00:30:58,023 Dam. 357 00:30:58,106 --> 00:30:59,733 Last page. 358 00:31:10,744 --> 00:31:13,914 - I'm sorry. - Did everyone live happily ever after? 359 00:31:15,082 --> 00:31:17,918 He lost his leg to gangrene waiting for her on the island. 360 00:31:18,001 --> 00:31:20,754 - But they're together now. - Wonderful. 361 00:31:20,837 --> 00:31:23,590 - Look. You got your PalmPilot back. - A nightmare. 362 00:31:23,673 --> 00:31:26,218 Okay. So who do I owe? 363 00:31:26,301 --> 00:31:29,388 Okay, Bobby at Hasbro, Reeves at Crunch... 364 00:31:29,471 --> 00:31:31,306 and the finals came in for Love f0r5a/e. 365 00:31:31,390 --> 00:31:33,016 The call with the studio's at 4:00. 366 00:31:33,100 --> 00:31:36,144 The margarine thing's in 15 in the conference room. j.j. wants to talk to you before that. 367 00:31:36,228 --> 00:31:39,439 One more thing. I remember that you told me to start thinking ahead. 368 00:31:39,523 --> 00:31:42,025 So I know your brother's getting back from his retreat tomorrow... 369 00:31:42,109 --> 00:31:44,111 and if you want something in the fridge or- 370 00:31:44,194 --> 00:31:45,987 Dam. 371 00:31:46,071 --> 00:31:48,073 Can you tell me why I'm upset right now? 372 00:31:49,199 --> 00:31:50,742 Because- 373 00:31:51,451 --> 00:31:55,330 j.j. called this morning. That is why I have a cell phone- so you can call me whenever- 374 00:31:55,414 --> 00:31:58,667 Kate. He didn't call. He just popped his head in here and spoke two sentences. 375 00:31:58,750 --> 00:32:00,001 So he's back? 376 00:32:00,085 --> 00:32:02,796 Margo says he's gonna make a big announcement about the merger next week. 377 00:32:02,879 --> 00:32:06,049 Margo? What does she know? How does she know anything about anything? 378 00:32:08,176 --> 00:32:09,678 All right. 379 00:32:09,761 --> 00:32:14,391 He popped his head in here. All right. You have to tell me exactly what he said, Darci. 380 00:32:14,474 --> 00:32:16,518 You have to start at the beginning and tell me- 381 00:32:16,601 --> 00:32:19,813 He said, “Tell Kate I'm gonna sit in on Farmer's Bounty.” 382 00:32:21,314 --> 00:32:22,774 J-J- 383 00:32:22,858 --> 00:32:25,694 - Good morning, Kate. - Good morning. 384 00:32:26,278 --> 00:32:27,988 I'll see you in there. 385 00:32:47,215 --> 00:32:49,426 Good Lord, it still stands. 386 00:32:51,386 --> 00:32:55,724 The world has changed all around it, but Roebling's erection still stands! 387 00:32:57,392 --> 00:32:59,603 That, my friend, is a miracle! 388 00:32:59,686 --> 00:33:02,230 - What? - It's a miracle, man. 389 00:33:02,314 --> 00:33:04,065 It's a bridge. 390 00:33:04,149 --> 00:33:06,860 Tell me, when did they adapt it for steam engines? 391 00:33:09,321 --> 00:33:10,864 The fire brigade! 392 00:33:20,749 --> 00:33:23,168 Come here. it's okay. 393 00:33:26,296 --> 00:33:28,798 I don't know how it happened. Found him in the shaft. 394 00:33:28,882 --> 00:33:30,383 Stuart. 395 00:33:31,218 --> 00:33:33,345 Leopold, what are you doing out here? 396 00:33:33,428 --> 00:33:35,388 - Down, one, two, three. - Get back inside. 397 00:33:36,556 --> 00:33:38,308 One, two, three. 398 00:33:40,602 --> 00:33:42,896 They're taking him to Goodman Memorial. 399 00:33:46,691 --> 00:33:49,986 Fresh creamely butter. 400 00:33:50,070 --> 00:33:53,114 Is there anything more comforting? 401 00:33:53,198 --> 00:33:57,202 There is. And I know you will agree when you try Farmer's Bounty... 402 00:33:57,285 --> 00:34:00,121 with the essence of real butter. 403 00:34:00,205 --> 00:34:01,831 ya. In every bite. 404 00:34:01,915 --> 00:34:08,046 Your first choice. However, 45% of our demo circled “shifty” as his key descriptor. Not good. 405 00:34:08,129 --> 00:34:11,508 This is what I say. Everybody should be trying Farmer's Bounty... 406 00:34:11,591 --> 00:34:15,428 with the real rich, creamy taste of real butter. 407 00:34:15,512 --> 00:34:18,723 Try it, and you will be losing pounds! Poof, boom, voila'! 408 00:34:18,807 --> 00:34:22,978 Your second choice. Unfortunately, the group found him obnoxious, abrasive... 409 00:34:23,061 --> 00:34:27,023 and a whopping 72% found himjust plain creepy. 410 00:34:27,107 --> 00:34:30,277 The spot rolls out in four days. We have to shoot- 411 00:34:30,360 --> 00:34:32,779 The product is shipping. What the hell am I supposed to do? 412 00:34:32,862 --> 00:34:34,656 We have to do another session- tomorrow. 413 00:34:34,739 --> 00:34:38,910 I had my assistant book the response room at National so we can decide then and there. 414 00:34:42,664 --> 00:34:44,374 - Kate, are you all right? - You okay? 415 00:34:44,457 --> 00:34:47,836 - I'm fine. - Geez, Kate. I asked for a decaf. 416 00:34:47,919 --> 00:34:50,046 Monica, I need you to call Barneys. 417 00:34:50,130 --> 00:34:53,633 I need a white blouse, size small, in Kate's office by lunch. 418 00:35:05,437 --> 00:35:06,980 Oh, dear. 419 00:35:10,317 --> 00:35:13,153 Hi, you've reached Stuart. Please leave a message. 420 00:35:13,236 --> 00:35:18,199 Leopold? Leopold, don't be frightened. This is Stuart, okay? 421 00:35:19,534 --> 00:35:23,413 I say, is this Bell's talking telegraph? I saw a prototype at last year's fair. 422 00:35:23,496 --> 00:35:25,415 I need you to pick up the handset, Leo. 423 00:35:25,498 --> 00:35:29,044 You pick up the green handset because I need to talk to you. 424 00:35:29,127 --> 00:35:31,338 Yes, yes. Are you there? Hello? 425 00:35:31,421 --> 00:35:34,132 Leopold, thank God. Listen. They're taking me to X-rays. 426 00:35:34,215 --> 00:35:37,427 Everything's gonna be fine, but you have to stay in the apartment. Do you understand me? 427 00:35:37,510 --> 00:35:41,681 Stuart. I saw Roebling's bridge today. I saw it. Complete. 428 00:35:41,765 --> 00:35:44,559 Yes, yes, but listen to me. You can't go out again. 429 00:35:44,643 --> 00:35:47,145 You have to stay in the apartment. You have to stay in the house. 430 00:35:47,228 --> 00:35:48,730 Stay in the apartment? For how long? 431 00:35:48,813 --> 00:35:51,608 Leo, I'll be back tonight. I promise. No more field trips. 432 00:35:51,691 --> 00:35:53,360 Would you- Ow! 433 00:35:54,736 --> 00:35:55,820 Hello? 434 00:35:55,904 --> 00:35:57,739 Stuart? Hello? 435 00:35:58,782 --> 00:36:00,200 Blast! 436 00:36:03,578 --> 00:36:04,871 Hello. 437 00:36:05,747 --> 00:36:07,040 Hello. 438 00:36:07,582 --> 00:36:09,125 Who are you? 439 00:36:09,209 --> 00:36:13,380 Hector. My mom works late on Wednesdays, so I watch TV with Stuart. 440 00:36:15,924 --> 00:36:18,009 Want some Pirate's Booty? 441 00:36:18,093 --> 00:36:20,887 Of course these guys- Hang on. 442 00:36:20,970 --> 00:36:24,432 Excuse me,j.j. I wanted to thank you for the shirt. That was very nice. 443 00:36:24,516 --> 00:36:26,226 Come in. Come in. 444 00:36:26,309 --> 00:36:29,896 Yeah. Uh-huh. Absolutely. 445 00:36:30,563 --> 00:36:33,483 Good. Good. Yeah. She's here right now. I'll tell her. 446 00:36:34,067 --> 00:36:36,361 Okay. Okay. Bye. 447 00:36:37,570 --> 00:36:39,197 Sit down. 448 00:36:39,280 --> 00:36:42,826 That was Barry. He was thrilled with your work at the screening last night. 449 00:36:42,909 --> 00:36:44,953 Good. Good. 450 00:36:51,584 --> 00:36:54,129 You're a rarity among women, Kate. 451 00:36:55,338 --> 00:36:56,673 I'm sorry? 452 00:36:56,756 --> 00:37:01,261 You don't cling to illusion. You don't get caught up in emotion. 453 00:37:02,262 --> 00:37:04,097 You don't do pretty. 454 00:37:05,098 --> 00:37:08,977 - Idon%? - You skew male. You're like a man. 455 00:37:09,936 --> 00:37:15,567 A man who understands women- their desires, their needs. 456 00:37:16,693 --> 00:37:20,905 You understand them, but you're not really one of them. 457 00:37:22,866 --> 00:37:24,868 You don't mind my being frank, do you? 458 00:37:24,951 --> 00:37:27,120 No. I don't. No. 459 00:37:29,289 --> 00:37:30,331 Edamame? 460 00:37:40,925 --> 00:37:42,635 Kate? 461 00:37:56,733 --> 00:37:59,235 - One day he lowered thejolly Roger- - Stu? 462 00:37:59,319 --> 00:38:02,739 And set sail in search of another kind of treasure. 463 00:38:02,822 --> 00:38:07,202 Not money, not jewels, not gold, but a bride. 464 00:38:07,285 --> 00:38:09,704 Despite his being a ruffian of the brine... 465 00:38:09,788 --> 00:38:13,124 fearless in his plunder and merciless with the sword... 466 00:38:13,208 --> 00:38:15,502 the Pirate King was also lonely. 467 00:38:17,504 --> 00:38:19,589 You see, he had never met a lady. 468 00:38:19,672 --> 00:38:21,341 He never met a girl? 469 00:38:22,008 --> 00:38:26,262 No. Not a girl, not a lady, not even his own mother. 470 00:38:26,346 --> 00:38:28,389 So what happened? 471 00:38:28,473 --> 00:38:31,017 As with all comedies, the most ridiculous thing imaginable: 472 00:38:31,100 --> 00:38:34,562 The Pirate King fell in love with the Major-General's daughter. 473 00:38:34,646 --> 00:38:37,524 Had the good fortune to see the premiere last month at the Fifth Avenue Theatre. 474 00:38:37,607 --> 00:38:40,026 Since when is Penzance at the Fifth? 475 00:38:44,113 --> 00:38:47,575 Is it your habit, sir, to simply enter a conversation without introduction? 476 00:38:48,409 --> 00:38:50,870 You are deep in it. 477 00:38:50,954 --> 00:38:54,165 It's cool. I'm an actor too. I'm Charlie. I live downstairs. 478 00:38:54,249 --> 00:38:57,085 Kate McKay, senior vice president! 479 00:38:57,168 --> 00:39:01,005 Darci, it hasn't happened. All he did was dangle a carrot. 480 00:39:01,089 --> 00:39:04,384 Until he makes a decision, the pressure's double. 481 00:39:04,467 --> 00:39:06,719 When's he gonna make a decision? 482 00:39:06,803 --> 00:39:09,806 We're having dinner tomorrow to discuss it further- at Commune. 483 00:39:09,889 --> 00:39:10,890 - Kate. - Yeah? 484 00:39:10,974 --> 00:39:12,350 - I have Stuart on the line. - No. 485 00:39:12,433 --> 00:39:13,560 - He says he's in a- - No. 486 00:39:13,643 --> 00:39:15,603 Hospital. 487 00:39:16,229 --> 00:39:18,314 I got the number of a specialist. The bone guy. 488 00:39:18,398 --> 00:39:20,567 He did David Cone's elbow, so he'll check on you tomorrow. 489 00:39:20,650 --> 00:39:24,028 No, you're not listening to me, Kate. I can't be here tomorrow. I can't be here today. 490 00:39:24,112 --> 00:39:26,030 I have to go home now. 491 00:39:26,114 --> 00:39:29,450 Leopold is just sitting alone in my apartment. God knows what could happen to him. 492 00:39:29,534 --> 00:39:32,620 - Do you realize he got outside today? - Of course he did. I made him walk your dog. 493 00:39:32,704 --> 00:39:33,663 - What? - Yeah. 494 00:39:33,746 --> 00:39:37,000 No, Kate, you can't do that. He can't go outside. 495 00:39:37,083 --> 00:39:42,005 Jesus Christ, Kate. He's from 1876. He doesn't know our customs. 496 00:39:42,088 --> 00:39:44,716 If something were to happen to him, it could be catastrophic. 497 00:39:44,799 --> 00:39:47,135 His mere presence has already caused an occlusion. 498 00:39:47,218 --> 00:39:48,261 An occlusion? 499 00:39:48,344 --> 00:39:50,930 If he doesn't go back on Monday, I may cease to exist! 500 00:39:53,349 --> 00:39:57,103 I'm his descendant, Kate- along with God knows how many other people. 501 00:39:57,186 --> 00:39:59,814 If he doesn't go back to April 28, 1876... 502 00:39:59,898 --> 00:40:02,692 he doesn't get married, he doesn't have children, and you want to know what? 503 00:40:02,775 --> 00:40:05,612 What happened with the elevators today- that's gonna seem like a walk in the park. 504 00:40:05,695 --> 00:40:09,657 This is embarrassing. it's embarrassing now. All right? I am sorry that you got hurt. 505 00:40:09,741 --> 00:40:12,702 But there happens to be a lot going on with me right now. 506 00:40:12,785 --> 00:40:14,954 Someone has to keep an eye on him. 507 00:40:15,663 --> 00:40:17,373 Stuart, he's a grown man. 508 00:40:17,457 --> 00:40:19,709 He's a grown man. He's fine. He can take care of himself. 509 00:40:19,792 --> 00:40:21,294 - No. Wait. - I'm going. 510 00:40:22,754 --> 00:40:24,339 Kate, please. 511 00:40:24,923 --> 00:40:28,051 Just take this to Spectra, okay? Get it developed. 512 00:40:28,134 --> 00:40:30,637 You'll see. I'm telling the truth. Tell Manny it's important. 513 00:40:31,346 --> 00:40:33,014 You want double prints? 514 00:40:33,097 --> 00:40:36,643 That's not funny, Kate. This is not a joke. 515 00:40:37,894 --> 00:40:39,687 You need help, Stuart. 516 00:40:39,771 --> 00:40:41,814 You need help. 517 00:40:58,039 --> 00:41:00,500 Why don't we say it faster? 518 00:41:00,583 --> 00:41:02,585 I'm very good at integral and differential calculus 519 00:41:02,669 --> 00:41:04,671 I know the scientific names of beings animalculous 520 00:41:04,754 --> 00:41:06,422 In short, in matters vegetable, animal and mineral 521 00:41:06,506 --> 00:41:08,424 I am the very model of a modern major-general 522 00:41:09,300 --> 00:41:10,677 Charlie. 523 00:41:11,761 --> 00:41:13,054 Hey, Kate! 524 00:41:14,639 --> 00:41:16,516 Can I see you downstairs for a minute? 525 00:41:16,599 --> 00:41:18,893 I invited someone to dinner. He's up there all alone. 526 00:41:18,977 --> 00:41:20,979 - It's not just what you did. - Stuart's in the hospital. 527 00:41:21,062 --> 00:41:24,482 - I didn't think you'd have such a problem- - No, you didn't think, Charlie. 528 00:41:24,565 --> 00:41:27,110 You came home early- one day early- from actor camp. You didn't call. 529 00:41:27,193 --> 00:41:29,862 Okay, it's not actor camp, and yeah, I came home a day early. 530 00:41:29,946 --> 00:41:32,532 There was this tai chi broad who kept trying to stick her fingers- 531 00:41:32,615 --> 00:41:36,619 No, this is the point! You immediately march upstairs to my ex-boyfriend's apartment... 532 00:41:36,703 --> 00:41:38,788 - and you invite his freakish friend down- - That's what it's about. 533 00:41:38,871 --> 00:41:41,332 It's not that I went up there. It's that it was your ex-boyfriend's- 534 00:41:41,416 --> 00:41:43,292 No, it's not about Stuart. 535 00:41:43,376 --> 00:41:44,627 Greetings, Kate. 536 00:41:44,711 --> 00:41:47,088 - Charles. - Hey, Leo. 537 00:41:47,714 --> 00:41:49,382 Be nice. 538 00:42:11,404 --> 00:42:13,072 So when's Stuart getting back? 539 00:42:13,156 --> 00:42:15,074 A couple of days. Maybe a week. 540 00:42:15,158 --> 00:42:17,160 He promised me that he would return late this evening. 541 00:42:17,243 --> 00:42:20,788 Maybe he will, Leopold. He's so big on keeping his promises. 542 00:42:31,674 --> 00:42:33,426 May I have the next course? 543 00:42:35,219 --> 00:42:37,096 There is no next course. 544 00:42:38,639 --> 00:42:43,352 Where I come from, the meal is the result of reflection and study. 545 00:42:43,436 --> 00:42:45,396 Menus are prepared in advance... 546 00:42:45,480 --> 00:42:47,482 timed to perfection. 547 00:42:47,565 --> 00:42:53,029 It is said, without the culinary arts, the crudeness of reality would be unbearable. 548 00:42:53,112 --> 00:42:55,323 We had a saying in the McKay house. 549 00:42:55,406 --> 00:42:59,243 You shake and shake the ketchup bottle, none will come, and then a lot'll. 550 00:43:03,498 --> 00:43:05,374 - What is that? - I beg your pardon? 551 00:43:05,458 --> 00:43:06,959 Why are you standing? 552 00:43:07,043 --> 00:43:09,003 I'm accustomed to stand when a lady leaves the table. 553 00:43:18,763 --> 00:43:21,724 Tell me, Charles. When Stuart and your sister were engaged... 554 00:43:21,808 --> 00:43:25,061 did you happen to read his papers on the temporal universe? 555 00:43:25,144 --> 00:43:27,063 I spent the morning perusing them and must confess- 556 00:43:27,146 --> 00:43:30,108 Stuart and I were never engaged. Not even close. 557 00:43:30,191 --> 00:43:31,692 But I did read- 558 00:43:32,443 --> 00:43:36,030 Thank you. But I did read his papers, however, to show support. 559 00:43:36,114 --> 00:43:38,199 Is Stuart still trying to make a time machine? 560 00:43:38,282 --> 00:43:41,244 That's the beauty of it. He discovered no machine was necessary. 561 00:43:41,327 --> 00:43:44,580 All one had to do was to develop formulae to forecast portals- 562 00:43:44,664 --> 00:43:46,958 natural windows in the fabric of time. 563 00:43:47,041 --> 00:43:50,711 Apparently Stuart located one utilizing modern- 564 00:43:55,258 --> 00:43:57,468 Utilizing modern theories of weather prediction. 565 00:43:57,552 --> 00:44:01,097 - What's a portal? - An opening which exists for but a moment. 566 00:44:01,180 --> 00:44:03,516 This explains why one must jump through it from a height... 567 00:44:03,599 --> 00:44:07,019 in order to achieve the required velocity- the speed of gravity to be exact. 568 00:44:07,103 --> 00:44:08,813 It's quite brilliant. 569 00:44:08,896 --> 00:44:11,274 You are so Method! You don't even break for a second, do you? 570 00:44:11,357 --> 00:44:15,027 - It's unbelievable! - Stop it, please! No more! Stop. 571 00:44:15,111 --> 00:44:19,824 Please. I beg you. I'm tired. Can you go away? Can you just go away? 572 00:44:19,907 --> 00:44:22,743 - She's drunk, Leo. - Shut up, Charlie. 573 00:44:22,827 --> 00:44:25,121 Can you go upstairs? Can you go away? 574 00:44:25,204 --> 00:44:28,541 I am truly sorry if I have offended you in any way. 575 00:44:29,333 --> 00:44:31,085 Good night, Charles. 576 00:44:33,379 --> 00:44:35,047 Good night, Leo. 577 00:44:39,719 --> 00:44:43,389 - What the hell was that? - He thinks he's from the 19th century, Charlie. 578 00:44:43,472 --> 00:44:46,475 - He thinks he's a duke. - I know. isn't that cool? 579 00:44:46,559 --> 00:44:48,561 - No. - Kate, he's in character. 580 00:44:48,644 --> 00:44:51,731 - He is an actor! - Really? For what show? 581 00:44:52,440 --> 00:44:55,359 You know that just because someone doesn't have a paying gig... 582 00:44:55,443 --> 00:44:58,821 it doesn't mean they're not working on their craft. 583 00:45:42,990 --> 00:45:44,951 What's going on here? 584 00:45:46,202 --> 00:45:49,789 I think there's something wrong with his... thing- 585 00:45:53,626 --> 00:45:56,087 - Give me that telephone. - No. 586 00:45:56,170 --> 00:45:58,089 - Give it to me! - No. I need to- 587 00:45:59,590 --> 00:46:02,218 What do you expect me to do? You took away my cell phone. 588 00:46:02,301 --> 00:46:05,513 - They're not allowed on hospital property. - I have to make a phone call! 589 00:46:05,596 --> 00:46:08,099 You're not going to make one now. 590 00:46:08,849 --> 00:46:11,352 No, no. You don't understand. This is a very important phone call. 591 00:46:11,435 --> 00:46:14,105 I have to leave this hospital now. I can't be here anymore. 592 00:46:14,188 --> 00:46:16,607 Mr. Besser, I am tired of telling you this. 593 00:46:16,691 --> 00:46:21,487 You are not going nowhere until Dr. Feinstein signs your release. 594 00:46:21,570 --> 00:46:23,948 You ever taken any Earth science, Ester? 595 00:46:24,490 --> 00:46:27,868 You look like a smart woman. You ever hear of the time-space continuum? 596 00:46:27,952 --> 00:46:29,912 Sounds important, doesn't it? Well, it is. 597 00:46:29,996 --> 00:46:34,625 You want to know something, Ester? it's broken! Okay? And I'm the only guy who can fix it. 598 00:46:34,709 --> 00:46:36,544 So why don't you go down the hall... 599 00:46:36,627 --> 00:46:39,755 and get on your little telephone and call Dr. Feinstein- 600 00:46:39,839 --> 00:46:42,341 - Good night, Mr. Besser. - You tell him that- 601 00:46:44,677 --> 00:46:46,679 You tell him that I- 602 00:46:51,100 --> 00:46:55,354 Point the toes, draw your shoulders back, take a deep breath in... 603 00:46:55,438 --> 00:46:58,607 and then exhale into downward-facing dog. 604 00:47:03,237 --> 00:47:05,406 ...straight up in the air. 605 00:47:05,489 --> 00:47:08,117 Be quiet! Be quiet! 606 00:47:22,381 --> 00:47:24,216 Bart, shut up! 607 00:47:25,343 --> 00:47:27,261 That thing is a damned hazard. 608 00:47:27,345 --> 00:47:29,889 It's just a toaster. 609 00:47:29,972 --> 00:47:33,059 Insertion of bread into that so-called toaster... 610 00:47:33,142 --> 00:47:35,603 produces no toast at all, merely warm bread. 611 00:47:35,686 --> 00:47:38,939 Inserting the bread twice produces charcoal. Clearly, to make proper toast... 612 00:47:39,023 --> 00:47:40,816 it requires one and a half insertions... 613 00:47:40,900 --> 00:47:43,861 which is something for which the apparatus doesn't begin to allow. 614 00:47:43,944 --> 00:47:49,325 One assumes that when the General of Electric built it, he might have tried using it. 615 00:47:49,408 --> 00:47:52,620 One assumes the General might take pride in his creations... 616 00:47:52,703 --> 00:47:55,164 instead of just foisting them on an unsuspecting public. 617 00:47:55,247 --> 00:47:59,668 You know something? Nobody gives a rat's ass... 618 00:47:59,752 --> 00:48:02,004 that you have to push the toast down twice. 619 00:48:02,088 --> 00:48:06,300 You know why? Because everybody pushes their toast down twice. 620 00:48:06,384 --> 00:48:08,135 Not where I come from. 621 00:48:08,219 --> 00:48:14,100 Because where you come from, toast is the result of reflection and study. 622 00:48:14,183 --> 00:48:17,019 Yes. You mock me. But perhaps one day when you've awoken... 623 00:48:17,103 --> 00:48:20,189 from a pleasant slumber to the scent of a warm brioche... 624 00:48:20,272 --> 00:48:22,691 smothered in marmalade and fresh creamery butter... 625 00:48:22,775 --> 00:48:27,655 you will understand that life is not solely comprised of tasks, but tastes. 626 00:48:28,823 --> 00:48:30,866 Say that again. 627 00:48:33,452 --> 00:48:35,079 Pardon me? 628 00:48:35,162 --> 00:48:37,081 - Did they start yet? - Yes. 629 00:48:37,164 --> 00:48:38,666 Session list. 630 00:48:39,375 --> 00:48:42,002 Leopold, Darci. Darci, Leopold. 631 00:48:42,086 --> 00:48:44,380 I'd like him to read. Can you tack him on at the end? 632 00:48:44,463 --> 00:48:48,467 Leopold, go with Darci. She'll take you to the greenroom and explain everything. 633 00:48:48,551 --> 00:48:50,886 I need to work out. I need a place I can work out. 634 00:48:50,970 --> 00:48:53,264 If I could get Mr. Duke. Is he ready? Where is he? 635 00:48:53,347 --> 00:48:56,183 Oh, my God. Look at this. Let's skip this one. 636 00:48:56,267 --> 00:48:58,436 Mr. Duke. Right here, on the floor. 637 00:48:58,519 --> 00:48:59,770 - Excuse me. - Right. 638 00:48:59,854 --> 00:49:01,897 That's your marker right there. just stand on that tape line. 639 00:49:01,981 --> 00:49:06,485 Forget this guy. I can't waste any more time,j.j. We need to make a decision now. 640 00:49:06,569 --> 00:49:09,447 All right. We got plenty of good choices. Let's cut it off, Kate. 641 00:49:10,573 --> 00:49:12,283 That would be a mistake,j.j. 642 00:49:13,117 --> 00:49:15,286 Kate, the client wants to move on. 643 00:49:15,369 --> 00:49:18,622 We should see this last guy. Two minutes. 644 00:49:18,706 --> 00:49:21,584 I think he looks like the Quaker Oats guy. 645 00:49:21,667 --> 00:49:25,463 Phil, it's really not about what you think. It's about what they think. 646 00:49:25,546 --> 00:49:28,090 They've been in a coma all day, and now look at them. 647 00:49:28,174 --> 00:49:32,219 To them, this guy is a dream. 648 00:49:32,303 --> 00:49:34,346 He's handsome, honest... 649 00:49:34,430 --> 00:49:36,974 courteous, stands when you walk in a room... 650 00:49:37,516 --> 00:49:40,019 brings you brioche in bed. 651 00:49:40,102 --> 00:49:42,021 If you eat his margarine... 652 00:49:42,104 --> 00:49:45,774 maybe your hips will shrink and he'll come to your door. 653 00:49:45,858 --> 00:49:49,361 I take it this is to be delivered in direct address, as on Geronimo? 654 00:49:50,070 --> 00:49:52,323 - Geronimo? - He means Gera/do. 655 00:49:52,406 --> 00:49:53,866 Exactly. 656 00:49:54,450 --> 00:49:58,037 Okay. Everyone quiet, please. And action. 657 00:50:04,627 --> 00:50:06,337 Start talkin', bud. 658 00:50:08,506 --> 00:50:11,217 Fresh creamery butter. 659 00:50:12,218 --> 00:50:14,553 Is there anything more comforting? 660 00:50:15,471 --> 00:50:18,599 I say there is. And perhaps you will agree when you sample... 661 00:50:18,682 --> 00:50:21,310 fat-free Farmer's Bounty... 662 00:50:21,393 --> 00:50:24,980 with the genuine essence of creamery butter in every bite. 663 00:50:25,481 --> 00:50:27,483 With every mouthful of Farmer's Bounty... 664 00:50:27,566 --> 00:50:31,445 you shall receive butter's luxurious comfort in your mouth... 665 00:50:31,529 --> 00:50:33,739 without adding to the luxury of your waistline. 666 00:50:34,323 --> 00:50:36,367 Not bad, Kate. 667 00:50:36,450 --> 00:50:38,369 Where'd you find him? 668 00:50:38,452 --> 00:50:40,246 He lives in my building. 669 00:50:41,163 --> 00:50:43,165 - Release form? - Right here. 670 00:50:43,249 --> 00:50:44,959 And here. 671 00:50:45,584 --> 00:50:46,669 Hi. 672 00:50:46,752 --> 00:50:49,255 - That was spectacular, Kate. - Thanks,j.j. 673 00:50:49,338 --> 00:50:51,507 We'll have to talk about it tonight at dinner. 674 00:50:53,592 --> 00:50:55,511 Nice work, Mr. Margarine. 675 00:50:55,594 --> 00:50:57,096 Thank you. 676 00:50:58,430 --> 00:51:00,766 Outfit was a great idea. Nice. 677 00:51:04,520 --> 00:51:06,981 Yes! Yes! 678 00:51:07,064 --> 00:51:10,067 Yes! Yes, yes! 679 00:51:15,197 --> 00:51:18,867 - You seem pleased. - You did so great in there! 680 00:51:18,951 --> 00:51:20,536 Man! 681 00:51:20,619 --> 00:51:26,417 You are gonna be on a national television spot! 682 00:51:28,252 --> 00:51:33,132 - I take it you're dining with that man tonight. - Yeah.j.j. He's my boss. 683 00:51:34,717 --> 00:51:37,344 You require a chaperone. His intentions are obvious. 684 00:51:37,428 --> 00:51:39,972 I'm alone with you. Do I need a chaperone? 685 00:51:40,055 --> 00:51:42,933 We're not courting, Kate. See, if we were, as a man of honor... 686 00:51:43,017 --> 00:51:45,603 I would have informed you of my intentions in writing. 687 00:52:05,080 --> 00:52:06,832 Good day. 688 00:52:08,083 --> 00:52:11,170 - Hey! - Kate, why don't we take one of these? 689 00:52:11,253 --> 00:52:13,047 They're for tourists. 690 00:52:13,756 --> 00:52:15,466 Sorry. She doesn't seem interested. 691 00:52:15,549 --> 00:52:17,676 Hey. Hello. Hello. 692 00:52:19,178 --> 00:52:20,888 Hey! Hey! 693 00:52:22,181 --> 00:52:24,725 Hey! Hey, you- 694 00:52:26,852 --> 00:52:27,936 Kate! 695 00:52:28,020 --> 00:52:29,563 Hey, you asshole! 696 00:52:33,108 --> 00:52:36,528 Hey! Fm gonna get you! 697 00:52:48,248 --> 00:52:49,750 Hey! 698 00:52:49,833 --> 00:52:51,168 Asshole! 699 00:52:53,504 --> 00:52:55,214 Goddamn it! 700 00:53:09,228 --> 00:53:11,271 - Give me your hand! - What? 701 00:53:11,355 --> 00:53:12,856 Your hand, woman! 702 00:53:30,124 --> 00:53:32,418 What do you think you're doing? 703 00:53:52,771 --> 00:53:53,939 Shit! 704 00:54:03,574 --> 00:54:06,660 I warn you, scoundrel. I was trained to ride at the King's Academy... 705 00:54:06,744 --> 00:54:08,495 and schooled in weaponry by the palace guard. 706 00:54:08,579 --> 00:54:11,206 You stand no chance. Where you run, I shall ride... 707 00:54:11,290 --> 00:54:14,501 and when you stop, the steel of this strap will be lodged in your brain. 708 00:54:39,777 --> 00:54:42,321 Your boyfriend's a very good rider. 709 00:54:42,404 --> 00:54:44,031 Yeah. 710 00:55:03,634 --> 00:55:05,594 Are you for real? 711 00:55:05,677 --> 00:55:07,387 Pardon me? 712 00:55:07,471 --> 00:55:09,389 Are you for real? 713 00:55:10,766 --> 00:55:12,476 I believe so. 714 00:55:13,727 --> 00:55:15,521 You're a duke? 715 00:55:17,105 --> 00:55:19,149 I was born a duke. 716 00:55:19,233 --> 00:55:21,235 But I've never felt like one. 717 00:55:26,990 --> 00:55:29,368 Stay. Sit. 718 00:55:30,702 --> 00:55:32,496 On your feet. Stay. 719 00:55:39,002 --> 00:55:40,254 Stay. 720 00:55:41,338 --> 00:55:43,006 Good boy. 721 00:55:49,179 --> 00:55:51,056 I'm off to dinner. 722 00:55:51,139 --> 00:55:52,850 - What are you two doing? - I don't know. 723 00:55:52,933 --> 00:55:56,979 Maybe we'll watch the rest of the game or go out- something. 724 00:55:57,062 --> 00:55:58,564 Thank you. 725 00:55:58,647 --> 00:56:02,025 Kate, may I repeat my offer to serve as a chaperone? 726 00:56:03,026 --> 00:56:04,903 No, thank you, Leopold. 727 00:56:04,987 --> 00:56:07,406 Charles, don't you find this inappropriate? As her brother, I would think- 728 00:56:07,489 --> 00:56:11,493 As her brother, I would think that my sister would invite me to an audition. 729 00:56:11,577 --> 00:56:13,996 Could bejust me though. Seems kind, but- 730 00:56:14,079 --> 00:56:15,581 Charlie. 731 00:56:15,664 --> 00:56:18,000 You're not exactly a margarine spokesperson. 732 00:56:18,083 --> 00:56:20,752 - I can't sell butter, Kate? - I don't mean to be insulting. I don't. 733 00:56:20,836 --> 00:56:23,463 It's insulting. I'm an actor. You don't have faith in me to sell butter? 734 00:56:23,547 --> 00:56:25,090 No. I'm sorry. 735 00:56:25,173 --> 00:56:27,426 I can do British, Kate. I'm an actor. I can be anybody. 736 00:56:27,509 --> 00:56:29,845 - You're a very, very good actor. You are. - I am a good actor. 737 00:56:29,928 --> 00:56:35,601 Fine. All right. A Victorian dude who's never seen a Mets game watching TV. 738 00:56:35,684 --> 00:56:36,768 Okay. 739 00:56:36,852 --> 00:56:37,853 Scene. 740 00:56:37,936 --> 00:56:40,522 I say, are those little people in that box of phosphors? 741 00:56:40,606 --> 00:56:44,484 Why, crikey, I believe it is. This game's more beguiling than cricket. 742 00:56:44,568 --> 00:56:48,405 Indian. Good gollyjesus. It looks like Mike Piazza just hit a game. 743 00:56:48,488 --> 00:56:50,824 Look at this. How about Canadian? 744 00:56:50,908 --> 00:56:54,453 Right on. Right on. You like butter? Yeah, what's that “a boot”? 745 00:56:54,536 --> 00:56:56,371 Right on. I think he hit a ball. 746 00:56:56,455 --> 00:56:58,874 - Good night. - Good night. 747 00:56:58,957 --> 00:57:01,418 Look at that. All those people up in that stadium. 748 00:57:01,501 --> 00:57:04,379 You know what they probably could go for? Some margarine! 749 00:57:04,463 --> 00:57:09,301 When your friend walked in in that outfit, I was getting a little nervous for you there. 750 00:57:10,510 --> 00:57:13,931 “If you eat his margarine, maybe your hips will shrink.” 751 00:57:14,014 --> 00:57:17,017 it's brilliant. You saved Phil from his own ambivalence. 752 00:57:17,100 --> 00:57:19,978 I knew it was the way to go, in my gut. 753 00:57:20,812 --> 00:57:22,898 I'm counting on that gut. 754 00:57:22,981 --> 00:57:26,652 Can I get a bottle of your '95 Lynch-Bages and a bottle of Evian? 755 00:57:26,735 --> 00:57:29,863 I'll tell you one thing. Your friend is gonna be bigger than Mr. Whipple. 756 00:57:30,948 --> 00:57:32,074 Thanks. 757 00:57:32,157 --> 00:57:33,992 You're not sleeping with him, are you? 758 00:57:35,619 --> 00:57:36,620 No. 759 00:57:38,163 --> 00:57:39,164 No. 760 00:57:43,335 --> 00:57:45,504 Leo. Leo, come on. Come here. 761 00:57:46,171 --> 00:57:47,839 How's it going, man? 762 00:57:52,928 --> 00:57:54,972 See the girl with the long, brown hair? 763 00:57:55,055 --> 00:57:56,598 That's Patrice. 764 00:57:57,182 --> 00:57:59,434 - She's lovely. - She's mine. 765 00:57:59,518 --> 00:58:01,520 Congratulations. 766 00:58:11,530 --> 00:58:13,448 Hey, everybody, this is Leo. 767 00:58:13,532 --> 00:58:16,118 - Leo, this is everybody. - Hey, what's up? 768 00:58:16,201 --> 00:58:17,285 - Dennis. - Hello. 769 00:58:17,369 --> 00:58:19,663 Shelby, Allison, Monica. 770 00:58:19,746 --> 00:58:23,125 And this is the insatiable Patrice. 771 00:58:24,001 --> 00:58:25,460 - Hey, Charlie. - Hi. 772 00:58:25,544 --> 00:58:27,504 - Hey. - How do you do? 773 00:58:27,587 --> 00:58:29,840 - Patrice, let me assist you. - Thanks. 774 00:58:29,923 --> 00:58:32,509 You got it? That's cool. He'll get it. 775 00:58:38,849 --> 00:58:40,851 Let me get that for ya. 776 00:58:43,854 --> 00:58:45,439 Here you go. 777 00:58:45,522 --> 00:58:47,232 You look nice tonight. 778 00:58:47,315 --> 00:58:48,608 Very' 779 00:58:49,443 --> 00:58:51,611 Like a Judy Blume book. 780 00:58:53,447 --> 00:58:57,451 That's good, because I thought for a moment that body of water here was a moat. 781 00:58:57,534 --> 00:58:59,244 No, no. That's a pond. 782 00:58:59,327 --> 00:59:01,204 The gardens are devastating. 783 00:59:01,288 --> 00:59:03,415 They are. They're very, very beautiful. 784 00:59:04,541 --> 00:59:06,543 You'll have to come see them firsthand. 785 00:59:06,626 --> 00:59:08,128 Right. Right. 786 00:59:08,211 --> 00:59:11,006 After the merger, I'm gonna be stuck over there setting things up. 787 00:59:11,089 --> 00:59:16,053 I'll be craving a little face time from my new top honcho in New York. 788 00:59:17,929 --> 00:59:20,390 - What are you saying? - I'm saying you should come visit. 789 00:59:20,474 --> 00:59:22,184 I'll fly you over for the weekend. 790 00:59:22,267 --> 00:59:26,813 I heard that, but the other part. The part before that. 791 00:59:26,897 --> 00:59:30,567 The part about the top honcho. I didn't understand that part. 792 00:59:30,650 --> 00:59:32,944 How about catching an opera, Saturday? 793 00:59:33,028 --> 00:59:34,946 La Bohéme's at the Met. 794 00:59:36,656 --> 00:59:40,243 Okay, so she comes back- The audience is about to leave, she comes back onstage... 795 00:59:40,327 --> 00:59:44,623 and she starts squirting the audience with this turkey baster filled with this pine mist. 796 00:59:44,706 --> 00:59:47,584 And she's screaming, “Unsex me! Unsex me!” 797 00:59:47,667 --> 00:59:51,797 But no tears.just raw human passion. 798 00:59:51,880 --> 00:59:54,007 - Isn't Willem Dafoe part of that group? - Yeah. 799 00:59:54,091 --> 00:59:58,929 He did this monologue about how all the best things in life are hidden in people's basements. 800 00:59:59,012 --> 01:00:00,347 Like the Louvre. 801 01:00:05,268 --> 01:00:06,978 I'm sorry. You were saying, Charles? 802 01:00:07,062 --> 01:00:09,856 No, what about the Louvre? 803 01:00:09,940 --> 01:00:12,109 Tell us what you were gonna say. 804 01:00:12,192 --> 01:00:16,363 Only a fraction of the Louvre is on the walls. The rest is in the basement. 805 01:00:16,446 --> 01:00:18,990 - You've been in the basement of the Louvre? - Oh, yes. 806 01:00:19,825 --> 01:00:21,618 I was an art history major at Vassar. 807 01:00:23,286 --> 01:00:25,580 So, what's down there? 808 01:00:25,664 --> 01:00:28,500 That's where the real show begins... 809 01:00:28,583 --> 01:00:30,836 unspoiled by dilettantes. 810 01:00:30,919 --> 01:00:35,882 Da Vinci, Michelangelo, David, Chardin. 811 01:00:36,758 --> 01:00:38,969 “Allow me to assist you, Patrice.” 812 01:00:39,052 --> 01:00:41,012 “Let me light that for you, Monica.” 813 01:00:41,096 --> 01:00:45,433 “What, this? This is my family crest. Been in the family for”- 814 01:00:45,517 --> 01:00:47,769 “ln the basement. What do they have in the basement? 815 01:00:47,853 --> 01:00:51,982 Why, the works ofda Vinci, Michelangelo, Chardin, David. 816 01:00:52,065 --> 01:00:56,820 All surrounded by great coral sponges to absorb the moisture.” 817 01:00:58,530 --> 01:01:02,242 just for the record, I was working it. I was in the zone... 818 01:01:02,325 --> 01:01:03,952 and I would have gotten her number... 819 01:01:04,035 --> 01:01:08,039 if you hadn't turned the evening into a guided tour of the Louvre. 820 01:01:08,123 --> 01:01:09,708 My apologies. 821 01:01:10,584 --> 01:01:15,172 Let's get one thing straight. Patrice thought you were cute. Probably gay and cute. 822 01:01:15,255 --> 01:01:17,424 And cute, Leo- that's the kiss of death. 823 01:01:17,507 --> 01:01:19,134 - Perhaps. - Perhaps certainly. 824 01:01:19,217 --> 01:01:21,136 I believe this is her number. 825 01:01:21,761 --> 01:01:25,432 As I see it, Patrice has not an inkling of your affections. And it's no wonder. 826 01:01:25,515 --> 01:01:27,475 You, Charles, are a merry-andrew. 827 01:01:28,143 --> 01:01:30,604 - A what? - Everything plays a farce to you. 828 01:01:30,687 --> 01:01:32,939 Women respond to sincerity. 829 01:01:33,023 --> 01:01:35,984 This requires pulling one's tongue from one's cheek. 830 01:01:36,067 --> 01:01:38,653 No one wants to be romanced by a buffoon. 831 01:01:39,362 --> 01:01:41,239 Now that number rings her. 832 01:01:41,823 --> 01:01:44,326 - Yes. - So ring her tomorrow. 833 01:01:44,409 --> 01:01:46,703 I can't. She gave the number to you. 834 01:01:46,786 --> 01:01:48,872 Only because I told her of your affections. 835 01:01:50,373 --> 01:01:52,375 What did you say? 836 01:01:52,459 --> 01:01:55,295 Merely that you admired her, but you were hesitant to make an overture... 837 01:01:55,378 --> 01:01:57,714 since you'd been told she was courting another. 838 01:01:58,673 --> 01:02:00,759 Shit. That's good! 839 01:02:01,593 --> 01:02:04,846 - What did she say? - She handed me the napkin. 840 01:02:08,516 --> 01:02:10,268 Charles, it's quite late. 841 01:02:10,352 --> 01:02:12,229 No, no, dude. She won't be home yet. 842 01:02:12,312 --> 01:02:15,190 I get her machine, I leave a message, ball's in her court. 843 01:02:15,273 --> 01:02:17,317 You're ladling calculation upon comedy. 844 01:02:17,400 --> 01:02:20,111 The point is to keep the ball in your court. 845 01:02:22,322 --> 01:02:24,574 You're right. You're right. 846 01:02:25,116 --> 01:02:27,953 - Okay. - Nothing need be clone till tomorrow. 847 01:02:28,036 --> 01:02:30,622 Tomorrow. Then I make my move. 848 01:02:30,705 --> 01:02:34,209 An overture, Charles. Make your intentions known. 849 01:02:34,292 --> 01:02:37,212 Think of pleasing her, not vexing her. 850 01:02:37,295 --> 01:02:40,590 - No vexing. - You're intoxicated. We should retire. 851 01:02:40,674 --> 01:02:43,468 - I'm sure Kate will be home. - I doubt it. 852 01:02:43,551 --> 01:02:45,470 But it's nearly midnight. 853 01:02:47,889 --> 01:02:49,933 - You like her, don't you? - Who? 854 01:02:50,016 --> 01:02:51,268 Kate. 855 01:02:52,978 --> 01:02:54,813 - You do! - Charles. Charles! 856 01:02:54,896 --> 01:02:56,439 You like my sister! 857 01:02:56,523 --> 01:02:59,067 You made your intentions known, right? Right? 858 01:02:59,150 --> 01:03:02,696 - You've been drinking. - Leo, Commune right around the corner. 859 01:03:02,779 --> 01:03:05,198 We could stop in, you could give me a couple of pointers... 860 01:03:05,282 --> 01:03:06,825 pull out a chair or two. 861 01:03:06,908 --> 01:03:08,451 You could throw down a gesture here or there. 862 01:03:08,535 --> 01:03:11,162 See, it's one thing with Patrice. You don't give a shit. 863 01:03:11,746 --> 01:03:15,375 It's a whole other ball of wax when it's a girl you like, huh? 864 01:03:16,167 --> 01:03:18,795 Yeah, who's the merry-andrew now? 865 01:03:21,631 --> 01:03:23,800 You want to vex my sister! 866 01:03:24,592 --> 01:03:27,679 I have to confess that I'm a little bit confused. 867 01:03:29,139 --> 01:03:32,267 No. Thank you. When you asked me to dinner tonight... 868 01:03:32,350 --> 01:03:35,186 I was under the impression that we were here to discuss- 869 01:03:35,270 --> 01:03:38,606 - The merger. - Yes. Right. Yes. 870 01:03:38,690 --> 01:03:40,358 And a possible promotion. 871 01:03:40,442 --> 01:03:43,945 Yes. Yes, that too. 872 01:03:44,029 --> 01:03:47,282 And dinner is winding down... 873 01:03:47,365 --> 01:03:49,200 and we haven't really discussed... 874 01:03:49,284 --> 01:03:52,620 anything even remotely relevant to what I thought we came here to- 875 01:03:52,704 --> 01:03:55,457 I don't believe I've ever seen you this flustered, Kate. 876 01:03:55,540 --> 01:03:57,208 You haven't even kissed me yet. 877 01:04:00,086 --> 01:04:02,255 Yeah. Right. 878 01:04:03,381 --> 01:04:05,550 I like you,j.j., I do. I like you quite a bit. 879 01:04:05,633 --> 01:04:07,552 As a matter of fact... 880 01:04:07,635 --> 01:04:09,971 I think you would agree that a working- 881 01:04:10,055 --> 01:04:13,683 a successful working relationship requires a great deal of- 882 01:04:13,767 --> 01:04:16,269 - What exactly is our working relationship? - Kate. 883 01:04:16,353 --> 01:04:18,229 - I'm not- - Hi, Kate! 884 01:04:19,481 --> 01:04:21,566 - Hi. - Charlie? 885 01:04:21,649 --> 01:04:23,610 What are you doing here? 886 01:04:23,693 --> 01:04:25,445 Wejust thought we'd come by to say hi. 887 01:04:25,528 --> 01:04:26,738 - Kate. -j.j., right? 888 01:04:26,821 --> 01:04:28,031 Might I have a word with you? 889 01:04:28,114 --> 01:04:29,532 - Now? - I'm Charlie, the actor. 890 01:04:29,616 --> 01:04:30,784 - In private. - How you doin'? 891 01:04:30,867 --> 01:04:32,827 No! No. 892 01:04:32,911 --> 01:04:34,412 Mr. Margarine. 893 01:04:35,580 --> 01:04:37,415 Please join us. 894 01:04:37,999 --> 01:04:39,959 Where did you say it is? 895 01:04:40,043 --> 01:04:41,544 - In Sussex. - Near Balmore. 896 01:04:41,628 --> 01:04:43,922 - Yes. - Built in the 18th century. 897 01:04:44,005 --> 01:04:47,467 - Early 18th century. - Really? Are you quite sure? 898 01:04:49,469 --> 01:04:52,013 - Yes. - He's got pictures, Leopold. 899 01:04:52,097 --> 01:04:55,600 Perhaps you were swindled, because I can assure you as of the late 19th century... 900 01:04:55,683 --> 01:04:57,727 there's nothing but farmland near Balmore. 901 01:04:57,811 --> 01:04:59,729 - You're mistaken. - That's not possible. 902 01:04:59,813 --> 01:05:03,608 - It's quite possible, Leopold, that you are mistaken. - No, it is not. 903 01:05:03,691 --> 01:05:05,735 - It's actually quite possible. - Balmore- it's not possible. 904 01:05:05,819 --> 01:05:08,780 Balmore is the only manor house in the county. I know this because I grew up there. 905 01:05:08,863 --> 01:05:11,199 Leopold, it wasn't where you grew up. 906 01:05:11,282 --> 01:05:13,993 - Leo, do you enjoy opera? - I do. And do you? 907 01:05:14,077 --> 01:05:16,329 Yes. It keeps me alive. 908 01:05:17,497 --> 01:05:20,083 - Do you have a favorite? - Bohéme. La Bohéme. 909 01:05:20,166 --> 01:05:22,877 - La Bohéme. - I've seen it 12 times. 910 01:05:22,961 --> 01:05:24,921 That's how I learned to speak French. 911 01:05:25,547 --> 01:05:27,465 - You speak French? - Fluently. 912 01:05:37,308 --> 01:05:38,977 What did he say? 913 01:05:43,481 --> 01:05:47,485 “How sweet your face looks gently encircled by the soft moonlight.” 914 01:05:49,612 --> 01:05:52,740 - I like that. - From the opening scene of Bohéme. 915 01:05:52,824 --> 01:05:54,492 A stunning duet. 916 01:05:54,576 --> 01:05:56,161 Andre sings it to Mimi. 917 01:05:56,244 --> 01:05:57,787 Andre. 918 01:05:57,871 --> 01:06:00,415 I invited Kate to the Met next week. She's never been. 919 01:06:00,498 --> 01:06:03,168 Patrone is singing Andre, and she turned me down. 920 01:06:04,335 --> 01:06:06,171 Can you explain that, Leopold? 921 01:06:08,923 --> 01:06:12,969 Bohéme is one of man's great achievements and should not be missed. 922 01:06:13,052 --> 01:06:15,305 But perhaps Kate resists on moral grounds. 923 01:06:16,556 --> 01:06:19,017 - How so? - Should we get the check? 924 01:06:19,100 --> 01:06:22,228 Some feel that to court a woman in one's employ... 925 01:06:22,312 --> 01:06:26,900 is nothing more than a serpentine effort to transform a lady to a whore. 926 01:06:30,945 --> 01:06:32,822 J-J- 927 01:06:36,743 --> 01:06:38,745 This guy's charming, Kate. 928 01:06:40,246 --> 01:06:43,458 The Duke of Margarine thinks me a serpent. 929 01:06:43,541 --> 01:06:45,543 - No, he doesn't. - No, not a serpent. 930 01:06:45,627 --> 01:06:47,128 That's too grand a word. 931 01:06:47,212 --> 01:06:51,216 Simply a braggart and a cad who knows less French than I, if that's possible. 932 01:06:53,676 --> 01:06:56,638 By the way, there is no Andre in Bohéme. 933 01:06:56,721 --> 01:06:58,181 It's Rodolfo. 934 01:06:58,264 --> 01:07:00,975 And though it takes place in France, it's rarely played in French... 935 01:07:01,059 --> 01:07:03,394 as it is written in Italian. 936 01:07:03,478 --> 01:07:04,979 Good night. 937 01:07:14,072 --> 01:07:15,698 50W- 938 01:07:25,750 --> 01:07:27,919 Kate, might I have a word? 939 01:08:19,804 --> 01:08:21,389 Coffee. 940 01:08:25,310 --> 01:08:27,228 - Morning! - Hi. 941 01:08:27,312 --> 01:08:30,565 - You want some coffee? - No, thanks. 942 01:08:30,648 --> 01:08:33,401 - You want to read your paper? - No, thank you, Charlie. 943 01:08:33,484 --> 01:08:37,155 I want to go to work and try and clean up this mess you made. 944 01:08:37,864 --> 01:08:39,490 You sure you don't- 945 01:08:46,456 --> 01:08:47,874 Hey, buddy. 946 01:08:47,957 --> 01:08:49,250 Kate! 947 01:08:49,334 --> 01:08:51,294 - Kate! - What? 948 01:08:51,377 --> 01:08:55,715 I just thought maybe you'd want a kiwi for the subway. 949 01:08:55,798 --> 01:08:58,176 That's a papaya, Charlie. 950 01:08:58,259 --> 01:09:00,386 You're right. Okay. 951 01:09:03,306 --> 01:09:07,644 But while using the product, 80% found the product... 952 01:09:07,727 --> 01:09:10,980 too soft to be... effective. 953 01:09:11,064 --> 01:09:14,651 This, of course, presents a conundrum for us marketeers. 954 01:09:14,734 --> 01:09:18,071 How do we maintain a soft feel... 955 01:09:18,154 --> 01:09:21,115 on the exterior of a plastic wrap four-pack... 956 01:09:22,200 --> 01:09:27,413 while retaining a useful tensile strength in the sheets? 957 01:09:27,497 --> 01:09:29,290 I'm gonna suggest to the Summer Soft people... 958 01:09:29,374 --> 01:09:33,711 to scale back to a limited release of the product in the mid-Atlantic states... 959 01:09:33,795 --> 01:09:37,590 where we can refine the product on the basis of extensive- 960 01:09:41,177 --> 01:09:42,970 Dearest Katherine... 961 01:09:43,971 --> 01:09:45,932 I behaved as an imbecile last night... 962 01:09:46,599 --> 01:09:49,143 animated in part by drink... 963 01:09:49,227 --> 01:09:53,314 in part by your beauty, and in part by my own foolish pride. 964 01:09:53,398 --> 01:09:55,900 And for that I am profoundly sorry. 965 01:09:56,818 --> 01:09:59,112 Please accept as a gesture of apology... 966 01:09:59,195 --> 01:10:02,198 a private dinner on the rooftop tonight at 8:00. 967 01:10:04,742 --> 01:10:06,744 Okay, where are we on Farmer's Bounty? 968 01:10:07,495 --> 01:10:08,996 Kate? 969 01:10:09,497 --> 01:10:11,416 Care to share with us? 970 01:10:13,501 --> 01:10:17,004 - Farmer's Bounty? - Where we are. 971 01:10:17,088 --> 01:10:19,006 Where we are is good. 972 01:10:19,090 --> 01:10:22,343 As you know, we found our spokesperson. 973 01:10:22,427 --> 01:10:26,139 The response room final showed a 96 in the top two boxes. 974 01:10:26,222 --> 01:10:28,558 His key female descriptors... 975 01:10:29,600 --> 01:10:32,937 were “handsome,” “romantic,” with several write-ins of... 976 01:10:33,938 --> 01:10:35,440 “What a hunk.” 977 01:10:38,359 --> 01:10:40,153 Great. 978 01:10:42,572 --> 01:10:45,158 - Camden Research Group. - Would you hold this? 979 01:10:45,241 --> 01:10:47,368 J-J-?j.j., hi. 980 01:10:48,119 --> 01:10:50,955 Listen, I just want to apologize again for what happened last night. 981 01:10:51,038 --> 01:10:53,541 There was no need for things to get that way. 982 01:10:54,834 --> 01:10:56,586 I appreciate that. 983 01:10:56,669 --> 01:10:58,671 So... everything's okay? 984 01:10:59,839 --> 01:11:01,507 Yes, Kate. 985 01:11:04,385 --> 01:11:07,138 I didn'tjump. I fell. There's a difference. 986 01:11:07,221 --> 01:11:09,390 A subtle difference, but nonetheless a difference. 987 01:11:09,474 --> 01:11:12,435 - Why did you fall down? - Because there was no elevator. 988 01:11:12,518 --> 01:11:14,228 And you feel that was your fault? 989 01:11:14,312 --> 01:11:16,898 Look, if you brought your great-great-grandfather forward in time... 990 01:11:16,981 --> 01:11:20,067 before he'd had a chance to invent the elevator or spawn his seed... 991 01:11:20,151 --> 01:11:22,820 it stands to reason that nature would correct itself... 992 01:11:22,904 --> 01:11:25,823 and the elevator and you would cease to exist. 993 01:11:25,907 --> 01:11:28,409 But clearly, you do exist. 994 01:11:29,118 --> 01:11:33,790 You know what? I'm sorry. I can see that you are a very busy man... 995 01:11:33,873 --> 01:11:37,752 and I'm sure there are plenty of people clamoring for your particular brand of attention. 996 01:11:37,835 --> 01:11:40,254 Unfortunately, lam not one of them, so if you don't mind... 997 01:11:40,338 --> 01:11:42,340 would you please unlock this door? 998 01:11:42,423 --> 01:11:45,009 I'm concerned you might be a danger to yourself. 999 01:11:46,469 --> 01:11:49,305 - And in such cases, the state law requires- - Hello! 1000 01:11:49,388 --> 01:11:51,724 - That I keep you under- - Will someone please open this door? 1001 01:11:55,478 --> 01:11:56,854 Fuck! 1002 01:11:58,189 --> 01:12:00,358 Everything all right, Dr. Geisler? 1003 01:12:00,441 --> 01:12:02,735 Yes, Gretchen. Everything's fine. 1004 01:12:04,487 --> 01:12:08,699 So, Stuart, I'm going to prescribe something called Prolixin. 1005 01:12:09,325 --> 01:12:12,537 It's a mild antipsychotic. Nothing too strong. 1006 01:12:13,788 --> 01:12:15,665 “L was wondering- 1007 01:12:16,666 --> 01:12:19,377 I was wondering if you would like to accompany me- 1008 01:12:20,545 --> 01:12:23,714 ...spontaneous events. If you might have been previously engaged, I understand.” 1009 01:12:23,798 --> 01:12:26,384 134. You'll see a man called Gracy. 1010 01:12:27,301 --> 01:12:30,221 Tonight at 7:00, 7:30. Please don't be late. 1011 01:12:31,973 --> 01:12:33,808 I gotta talk to you about this, okay? 1012 01:12:33,891 --> 01:12:35,893 'Cause there's some shit here that just cannot be said. 1013 01:12:35,977 --> 01:12:37,812 Did you assemble a bouquet for Patrice? 1014 01:12:37,895 --> 01:12:41,774 I'm gonna get one of these. But you just can't tell a woman she's “gracefully serene.” 1015 01:12:41,858 --> 01:12:45,069 - No, no. This will not do. - Why? 1016 01:12:45,152 --> 01:12:46,821 What is wrong with this one? 1017 01:12:46,904 --> 01:12:49,282 The orange lily implies extreme hatred... 1018 01:12:49,365 --> 01:12:52,785 the begonia and lavender danger and suspicion, respectively. 1019 01:12:52,869 --> 01:12:55,371 Every flower has a meaning, Charles. 1020 01:12:55,454 --> 01:12:57,915 Might I suggest the amaryllis... 1021 01:12:57,999 --> 01:13:01,377 which declares the recipient a most splendid beauty? 1022 01:13:01,460 --> 01:13:03,588 Or the cabbage rose. 1023 01:13:09,760 --> 01:13:11,470 Dam'.! 1024 01:13:14,849 --> 01:13:17,351 - What is this? - It's a reply to Leopold's invitation. 1025 01:13:17,435 --> 01:13:18,978 Uh-huh? 1026 01:13:19,061 --> 01:13:21,981 - You're going, right? - I haven't decided yet. 1027 01:13:22,064 --> 01:13:25,484 You haven't decided if you want to have dinner on your rooftop with a duke? 1028 01:13:25,568 --> 01:13:28,571 Who thinks he's from 1876! 1029 01:13:28,654 --> 01:13:30,573 No! And I would appreciate it if- 1030 01:13:30,656 --> 01:13:32,199 Kate, come on, okay? 1031 01:13:32,283 --> 01:13:34,201 I don't know what this guy did to piss you off... 1032 01:13:34,285 --> 01:13:36,746 but that is the best apology letter in the history of mankind! 1033 01:13:36,829 --> 01:13:39,582 Just sign it, Kate. it's 4:30. We'll fax it. 1034 01:13:42,501 --> 01:13:44,462 Kate McKay's office. 1035 01:13:45,087 --> 01:13:46,589 They hung UP- 1036 01:13:49,550 --> 01:13:51,135 Hi. ls Patrice there? 1037 01:13:52,970 --> 01:13:55,222 Hey, Patrice? Hi! 1038 01:13:55,306 --> 01:13:58,434 - It's me, Charlie. - Hey, Charlie. 1039 01:13:58,517 --> 01:14:01,520 Hi. I was just calling to find out if you got my flowers- 1040 01:14:01,604 --> 01:14:04,106 your flowers. 1041 01:14:04,190 --> 01:14:06,817 I was calling to see if you got the flowers I sent you. 1042 01:14:06,901 --> 01:14:08,277 Yeah, I did. 1043 01:14:08,903 --> 01:14:11,948 I was wondering if you would like to go to a movie tonight... 1044 01:14:12,031 --> 01:14:16,243 and maybe afterwards perhaps accompany me to dinner? 1045 01:14:16,786 --> 01:14:20,331 I understand completely if you're otherwise engaged. 1046 01:14:20,414 --> 01:14:24,001 But, you know, I just wanted to say that- 1047 01:14:25,002 --> 01:14:26,170 Yeah? 1048 01:14:30,925 --> 01:14:33,427 I wanted to say that you've, you know- 1049 01:14:35,513 --> 01:14:38,015 you've made an impression on me. 1050 01:14:40,518 --> 01:14:42,561 And it's not just the way you look. 1051 01:14:42,645 --> 01:14:46,691 I mean, which are great. Your looks are, you know, top-shelf. 1052 01:14:46,774 --> 01:14:48,275 But- 1053 01:14:51,487 --> 01:14:53,572 I don't know. lt's- 1054 01:14:55,199 --> 01:14:56,701 What? 1055 01:14:59,453 --> 01:15:01,789 You're graceful. 1056 01:15:01,872 --> 01:15:04,542 You know, the way you move and speak. 1057 01:15:06,293 --> 01:15:09,171 Some people have a way with words, and you- 1058 01:15:10,172 --> 01:15:11,674 you do. 1059 01:15:14,051 --> 01:15:16,846 The bottom line is, I like you. 1060 01:15:22,268 --> 01:15:23,769 Patrice? 1061 01:15:24,478 --> 01:15:26,397 What about 7:00? 1062 01:15:27,898 --> 01:15:29,650 7:00? 1063 01:15:29,734 --> 01:15:31,819 7:00 would be... heaven. 1064 01:15:31,902 --> 01:15:33,988 Okay. See you then. 1065 01:15:35,156 --> 01:15:37,450 It worked! It worked! 1066 01:15:37,533 --> 01:15:39,744 Who's going out with Patrice? Charlie's going out with Patrice! 1067 01:15:39,827 --> 01:15:41,579 Over there. Charlie going over there. 1068 01:15:42,329 --> 01:15:44,665 Better go get ready. Better go get changed. 1069 01:15:44,749 --> 01:15:47,960 Shouldn't change too much though 'cause she likes me for who I am. 1070 01:15:56,260 --> 01:15:57,386 Hey. 1071 01:15:57,470 --> 01:15:59,555 - Charlie, you look fantastic. - Yeah? 1072 01:15:59,638 --> 01:16:02,058 - Yeah. - I got a date. 1073 01:16:02,141 --> 01:16:04,226 I gotta go. Bye. 1074 01:16:04,310 --> 01:16:05,811 Bye. 1075 01:16:09,565 --> 01:16:11,067 - Kate? - Yeah? 1076 01:16:12,860 --> 01:16:15,112 Have a good time tonight. 1077 01:16:15,780 --> 01:16:17,114 Bye. 1078 01:17:03,494 --> 01:17:04,995 Oh, my God. 1079 01:17:08,374 --> 01:17:10,042 This is beautiful. 1080 01:17:11,919 --> 01:17:14,171 The very word for which I was searching. 1081 01:17:16,549 --> 01:17:17,675 May I? 1082 01:17:37,069 --> 01:17:39,321 She was a real romantic, my mom. 1083 01:17:39,405 --> 01:17:42,658 When Prince Charles and Lady Di got married, she had a party. 1084 01:17:42,741 --> 01:17:45,119 She made crumpets and jam. 1085 01:17:45,202 --> 01:17:47,746 It was like a Super Bowl party, but for moms. 1086 01:17:48,330 --> 01:17:50,082 She cried for a week. 1087 01:17:50,166 --> 01:17:52,835 I don't know the story of Prince Charles and Lady Di. 1088 01:17:52,918 --> 01:17:56,547 You don't want to. It's a cautionary tale. Further proof. 1089 01:17:56,630 --> 01:17:59,049 - Of what? - You can't live a fairy tale. 1090 01:18:18,652 --> 01:18:20,654 I'm not very good with men. 1091 01:18:23,657 --> 01:18:26,076 Perhaps you haven't found the right one. 1092 01:18:31,707 --> 01:18:34,960 Maybe. Or maybe the whole love thing... 1093 01:18:35,044 --> 01:18:37,755 is just a grown-up version of Santa Claus- 1094 01:18:37,838 --> 01:18:40,966 just a myth we've been fed since childhood... 1095 01:18:41,050 --> 01:18:43,969 so we keep buying magazines... 1096 01:18:44,053 --> 01:18:46,513 and joining clubs and doing therapy... 1097 01:18:46,597 --> 01:18:50,809 and watching movies with hit pop songs played over love montages... 1098 01:18:50,893 --> 01:18:54,063 all in this pathetic attempt to explain why our love Santa... 1099 01:18:54,146 --> 01:18:56,607 keeps getting caught in the chimney. 1100 01:18:59,902 --> 01:19:02,071 Otis always told me love is a leap. 1101 01:19:03,781 --> 01:19:06,825 Lamentably, I was never inspired tojump. 1102 01:19:09,036 --> 01:19:11,747 By my 30th birthday, I had, according to my uncle... 1103 01:19:11,830 --> 01:19:14,208 become a blemish on the family name. 1104 01:19:14,291 --> 01:19:18,212 So he brought me to this country with the proviso I marry an American... 1105 01:19:18,295 --> 01:19:21,840 a girl with a good deal of- 1106 01:19:22,633 --> 01:19:24,093 Charm? 1107 01:19:24,176 --> 01:19:25,886 Money. 1108 01:19:25,970 --> 01:19:29,765 Since my parents died, our family fortune had become, shall we say, depleted. 1109 01:19:31,392 --> 01:19:33,727 I would be married now if I hadn't followed Stuart. 1110 01:19:33,811 --> 01:19:35,813 I was to announce a bride that night. 1111 01:19:38,274 --> 01:19:39,650 Who? 1112 01:19:43,654 --> 01:19:45,322 I don't know. 1113 01:19:47,324 --> 01:19:49,827 Someone. One of them. 1114 01:20:01,922 --> 01:20:03,590 What are you doing? 1115 01:20:03,674 --> 01:20:05,467 I'm just cleaning up. 1116 01:20:06,468 --> 01:20:08,345 Would you do me the honor of a dance? 1117 01:20:10,389 --> 01:20:11,890 Please? 1118 01:20:40,252 --> 01:20:42,296 I am not much of a dancer. 1119 01:20:42,379 --> 01:20:44,214 You're doing famously then. 1120 01:21:02,191 --> 01:21:05,986 Leopold. This was lovely. 1121 01:21:07,446 --> 01:21:09,782 But I don't know if I can leap... 1122 01:21:10,366 --> 01:21:12,576 even if I am inspired. 1123 01:21:14,828 --> 01:21:17,581 People might think I'm brave, but I'm not. 1124 01:21:18,082 --> 01:21:22,169 The brave are simply those with the clearest vision of what is before them- 1125 01:21:22,252 --> 01:21:24,254 glory and danger alike- 1126 01:21:24,338 --> 01:21:26,965 and, notwithstanding, go out to meet it. 1127 01:21:47,319 --> 01:21:49,655 - Hey. - Morning, Charles. 1128 01:21:50,864 --> 01:21:52,658 How was your evening with Patrice? 1129 01:21:53,325 --> 01:21:54,827 Good. 1130 01:21:54,910 --> 01:21:56,161 Nice. 1131 01:21:57,246 --> 01:21:59,123 How was yours? 1132 01:21:59,206 --> 01:22:00,707 Good. 1133 01:22:00,791 --> 01:22:02,292 Nice. 1134 01:22:14,179 --> 01:22:17,141 Leo, don't you think it's time you tell me who you are? 1135 01:22:19,393 --> 01:22:21,145 What do you mean? 1136 01:22:21,728 --> 01:22:24,523 It's a blast doing the duke thing with you 24-7... 1137 01:22:24,606 --> 01:22:28,694 but I don't want to see Kate go through Stuart: The Sequel. 1138 01:22:29,403 --> 01:22:32,406 I know she seems pretty tough, but she hasn't had it that easy. 1139 01:22:32,489 --> 01:22:35,659 She's always getting stuck with people who don't hold up their end. 1140 01:22:36,785 --> 01:22:38,287 Like me. 1141 01:22:39,746 --> 01:22:42,082 - I just don't- - I understand, Charles. 1142 01:22:42,166 --> 01:22:44,501 - You do? - Yes. 1143 01:22:44,585 --> 01:22:46,086 So... 1144 01:22:47,296 --> 01:22:49,506 who are you? 1145 01:22:52,676 --> 01:22:54,887 I am the man who loves your sister. 1146 01:23:02,811 --> 01:23:06,356 Okay, you pour the soap in, shut the lid... 1147 01:23:07,065 --> 01:23:09,026 push the drawers in. 1148 01:23:09,526 --> 01:23:12,863 Close the door, and you push this button. 1149 01:23:12,946 --> 01:23:16,492 Word to the wise- Don't press that till she wakes up. 1150 01:23:16,575 --> 01:23:18,785 So she sees you doing it. 1151 01:23:18,869 --> 01:23:21,330 Clever. The proverbial tree in the woods. 1152 01:23:21,413 --> 01:23:23,540 If a man washes a dish and no one sees it- 1153 01:23:23,624 --> 01:23:25,918 - Did it happen? - Did it happen? Right. 1154 01:23:38,722 --> 01:23:41,141 - A cup of coffee, my dear. - Thank you. 1155 01:23:44,436 --> 01:23:45,938 Breakfast? 1156 01:23:52,736 --> 01:23:56,323 Nine-grain toast with strawberries and mascarpone, madam. 1157 01:23:58,617 --> 01:24:01,453 It's apparently low... 1158 01:24:02,371 --> 01:24:04,540 in polyunsaturates. 1159 01:24:15,050 --> 01:24:17,052 It's really good. 1160 01:24:18,428 --> 01:24:19,972 It's good. 1161 01:24:23,684 --> 01:24:25,894 What should we do today? 1162 01:24:31,608 --> 01:24:33,652 Oh, no, no! 1163 01:24:34,236 --> 01:24:36,363 No. Thank you. No. 1164 01:24:39,366 --> 01:24:41,827 You know what makes me happy? You don't look good in those. 1165 01:24:41,910 --> 01:24:44,746 They'rejust so completely inappropriate for you. 1166 01:25:04,558 --> 01:25:05,642 Kate. 1167 01:25:06,310 --> 01:25:08,061 Kate, Kate, come. 1168 01:25:10,314 --> 01:25:11,815 Leopold? 1169 01:25:12,608 --> 01:25:14,151 Leopold! 1170 01:25:14,234 --> 01:25:17,070 - Hey, what are you doing? - It boggles the mind that it is still here. 1171 01:25:17,154 --> 01:25:19,156 This is my uncle's home. Well, was. 1172 01:25:19,239 --> 01:25:21,533 This is where I lived. Good Lord. 1173 01:25:21,617 --> 01:25:24,036 A portrait of my parents... and me. 1174 01:25:27,623 --> 01:25:28,832 Leopold? 1175 01:25:30,626 --> 01:25:34,963 I don't think that we should just be barging around here like that. 1176 01:25:36,006 --> 01:25:37,341 Leopold? 1177 01:25:50,896 --> 01:25:52,856 My old quarters. 1178 01:26:03,533 --> 01:26:05,494 What are you doing? 1179 01:26:08,664 --> 01:26:10,165 Hey. 1180 01:26:15,253 --> 01:26:18,340 The place where I put everything I most cared for. 1181 01:26:23,553 --> 01:26:26,306 Things I didn't want my uncle to touch. 1182 01:26:36,900 --> 01:26:38,860 My mother's ring. 1183 01:26:40,404 --> 01:26:42,239 It's beautiful. 1184 01:26:52,874 --> 01:26:54,876 You know, I live on an island... 1185 01:26:56,253 --> 01:26:58,755 connected to everything by bridges... 1186 01:26:59,297 --> 01:27:01,341 and I never cross them. 1187 01:27:02,718 --> 01:27:04,886 I've lived here for 1 O years... 1188 01:27:06,096 --> 01:27:08,849 and I've never been to the other side of anything. 1189 01:27:08,932 --> 01:27:10,934 You've never traveled? 1190 01:27:11,935 --> 01:27:13,603 No. 1191 01:27:25,907 --> 01:27:27,409 Do you- 1192 01:27:27,909 --> 01:27:29,411 What? 1193 01:27:32,998 --> 01:27:35,083 Do you miss where you're from? 1194 01:27:43,383 --> 01:27:45,135 In a way, I'm- 1195 01:27:45,802 --> 01:27:47,471 I miss- 1196 01:27:48,513 --> 01:27:50,474 I miss its rhythm. 1197 01:27:51,808 --> 01:27:54,144 It was slower? 1198 01:27:54,227 --> 01:27:56,480 Quite a bit slower. 1199 01:27:56,563 --> 01:27:58,565 - Like today? - Yes. 1200 01:28:12,329 --> 01:28:14,414 Do you hear that, Leopold? Do you hear that music? 1201 01:28:14,498 --> 01:28:15,540 Yes. 1202 01:28:15,624 --> 01:28:18,919 Have you ever seen the movie Breakfast at fifilvnyk? 1203 01:28:19,002 --> 01:28:20,003 No. 1204 01:28:20,086 --> 01:28:21,296 “No.” 1205 01:28:22,798 --> 01:28:24,466 Not yet. 1206 01:28:25,801 --> 01:28:28,428 You see that guy down there with the light on? 1207 01:28:29,387 --> 01:28:32,974 He listens to the soundtrack of Breakfast at T/finyk... 1208 01:28:33,058 --> 01:28:34,559 every night... 1209 01:28:35,685 --> 01:28:37,729 until exactly midnight. 1210 01:28:38,313 --> 01:28:41,733 And then he turns his light off, goes to sleep. 1211 01:29:05,173 --> 01:29:07,259 That means it's Sunday. 1212 01:29:07,342 --> 01:29:09,553 I don't want it to be Sunday. 1213 01:29:10,470 --> 01:29:14,140 I want more of this. More 1876. 1214 01:29:15,475 --> 01:29:17,602 But, Kate, you don't work on Sundays. 1215 01:29:17,686 --> 01:29:19,187 We can have more. 1216 01:29:19,271 --> 01:29:23,859 I don't know, 'cause Sunday is the day before the day I work... 1217 01:29:23,942 --> 01:29:27,487 so... it gets poisoned. 1218 01:29:28,822 --> 01:29:30,699 I see. 1219 01:29:31,491 --> 01:29:35,370 Besides, tomorrow is the day we shoot your commercial. 1220 01:29:47,883 --> 01:29:49,175 Kate. 1221 01:29:51,761 --> 01:29:53,680 Would you- 1222 01:29:54,764 --> 01:29:56,683 Might you ever... 1223 01:29:57,934 --> 01:29:59,477 consider- 1224 01:30:12,115 --> 01:30:13,783 it's time for bed. 1225 01:30:21,124 --> 01:30:23,335 I'm so relaxed. 1226 01:30:23,418 --> 01:30:25,295 That's all right. 1227 01:30:45,774 --> 01:30:47,734 You're tucking me in. 1228 01:30:47,817 --> 01:30:49,319 Yes. 1229 01:30:50,320 --> 01:30:52,364 You're my Otis. 1230 01:30:52,447 --> 01:30:54,240 Yes, Your Grace. 1231 01:31:01,039 --> 01:31:03,083 Hey. Hey, don't- 1232 01:31:04,084 --> 01:31:06,336 Don't go upstairs. Stay. 1233 01:31:52,257 --> 01:31:54,676 I love you, Kate McKay. 1234 01:32:07,397 --> 01:32:09,149 Scone, Your Grace? 1235 01:32:09,232 --> 01:32:11,276 Thank you, Millard. 1236 01:32:11,860 --> 01:32:13,820 And you brought the Farmer's Bounty? 1237 01:32:13,903 --> 01:32:15,864 But of course. 1238 01:32:18,450 --> 01:32:20,660 Fresh creamery butter. 1239 01:32:20,744 --> 01:32:22,579 Is there anything more comforting? 1240 01:32:23,663 --> 01:32:25,665 I say there is... 1241 01:32:25,749 --> 01:32:30,211 and perhaps you'll agree when you sample fat-free Farmer's Bounty... 1242 01:32:30,295 --> 01:32:34,591 with the genuine essence of creamery butter in every bite. 1243 01:32:34,674 --> 01:32:37,552 With every mouthful of Farmer's Bounty... 1244 01:32:37,635 --> 01:32:41,389 you shall receive butter's luxurious comfort in your mouth... 1245 01:32:41,473 --> 01:32:44,059 without adding to the luxury of your waistline. 1246 01:32:45,268 --> 01:32:50,398 - Farmer's Bounty. - On this one, take a bite and smile. 1247 01:32:54,486 --> 01:32:55,987 And... cut! 1248 01:32:56,071 --> 01:32:57,906 All right, check gate. Good enough for me. 1249 01:32:57,989 --> 01:33:00,784 Can we get a Dedo up here and something to back up- 1250 01:33:00,867 --> 01:33:05,622 Excuse me. Excuse me. Is this an actual sample of Farmer's Bounty? 1251 01:33:05,705 --> 01:33:07,707 Yeah. Why? 1252 01:33:07,791 --> 01:33:09,542 This tastes like saddle soap. 1253 01:33:09,626 --> 01:33:11,419 That's not really your concern, is it? 1254 01:33:11,503 --> 01:33:13,546 - Is this correct? - Not my concern? 1255 01:33:13,630 --> 01:33:16,716 This product tastes like raw suet! How is that not my concern? 1256 01:33:16,800 --> 01:33:18,718 Hey, pal. It's a paycheck! 1257 01:33:18,802 --> 01:33:20,011 - Wait. - A paycheck? 1258 01:33:20,095 --> 01:33:22,388 This is an outrage! 1259 01:33:22,472 --> 01:33:24,724 Don't worry about the taste. Come back. We need another shot. 1260 01:33:24,808 --> 01:33:26,643 Something that maybe brings the light up on this. 1261 01:33:32,816 --> 01:33:34,609 Leopold. 1262 01:33:34,692 --> 01:33:36,361 Leopold! 1263 01:33:37,362 --> 01:33:40,156 Hey! Leopold, what's going on? What are you doing? 1264 01:33:40,240 --> 01:33:42,784 - They need you back in there. - Do they? 1265 01:33:42,867 --> 01:33:46,412 Yeah. They have to shoot the rest of the spot. They're not finished yet. 1266 01:33:46,496 --> 01:33:48,498 I want no part of it. 1267 01:33:49,833 --> 01:33:52,544 - Why? - Have you tasted it? 1268 01:33:52,627 --> 01:33:55,338 - Farmer's Bounty? - Yes, Farmer's Bounty. 1269 01:33:55,421 --> 01:33:57,507 - Yeah, I've tasted it. - It's revolting. 1270 01:33:58,049 --> 01:33:59,467 I know. 1271 01:33:59,551 --> 01:34:03,304 You know it's revolting, yet you have no qualms enlisting me to endorse it? 1272 01:34:03,930 --> 01:34:05,640 It's diet. 1273 01:34:05,723 --> 01:34:08,601 It's supposed to be awful. What is the problem? 1274 01:34:08,685 --> 01:34:11,020 The problem is that for no reason beyond my affection for you... 1275 01:34:11,104 --> 01:34:13,857 I find myself peddling pond scum to an unsuspecting public! 1276 01:34:14,774 --> 01:34:17,443 Listen. The stakes are very high for me here. 1277 01:34:17,527 --> 01:34:20,405 - You can't just quit because you don't like- - Yes, I can. And so can you. 1278 01:34:20,488 --> 01:34:24,742 When one finds oneself participating in an endeavor entirely without merit, one withdraws. 1279 01:34:24,826 --> 01:34:26,369 No. No. 1280 01:34:26,452 --> 01:34:29,038 Because sometimes you have to do things that you don't like. 1281 01:34:29,122 --> 01:34:31,833 Sometimes you have to suck it up and finish what you started. 1282 01:34:31,916 --> 01:34:33,543 It's part of life. 1283 01:34:33,626 --> 01:34:35,295 You sound like my uncle. 1284 01:34:35,378 --> 01:34:39,966 Look, Leopold,jansen Foods is a very important account for my company. 1285 01:34:40,049 --> 01:34:43,094 If you don't go back in there, then I get into a lot of trouble. 1286 01:34:43,178 --> 01:34:45,513 Is this what you do at work, Kate? 1287 01:34:46,014 --> 01:34:48,516 Research methods to deceive people? 1288 01:34:48,600 --> 01:34:50,810 Refine lies until they resemble truth? 1289 01:34:50,894 --> 01:34:54,355 - It's no wonder you dread your work week. - Oh, man! 1290 01:34:54,439 --> 01:34:57,233 - I don't have time for this. - What has happened to the world? 1291 01:34:57,901 --> 01:35:00,820 You have every convenience, every comfort, yet no time for integrity. 1292 01:35:00,904 --> 01:35:05,575 No. What I don't have time for are pious speeches by ZOO-year-old men... 1293 01:35:05,658 --> 01:35:07,869 who've never had to work a day in their life. 1294 01:35:07,952 --> 01:35:09,704 You have no idea what I've done with my life. 1295 01:35:09,787 --> 01:35:13,082 And you have no idea what I've done with mine. 1296 01:35:13,166 --> 01:35:16,586 I haven't had all that many comforts and conveniences, Leopold... 1297 01:35:16,669 --> 01:35:19,589 because I've been paying dues all of my life. 1298 01:35:19,672 --> 01:35:22,175 And I'm tired, and I need a rest. 1299 01:35:22,258 --> 01:35:26,554 And if I have to peddle a little pond scum to get one, then so be it! 1300 01:35:31,726 --> 01:35:32,977 Very well. 1301 01:35:42,570 --> 01:35:44,572 We're kidding ourselves, Leopold. 1302 01:35:47,617 --> 01:35:50,662 In point of fact, I don't even really know who you are. 1303 01:35:54,207 --> 01:35:57,210 You still don't believe I'm the man I say I am? 1304 01:35:59,587 --> 01:36:02,257 We had a great weekend. That's that. 1305 01:36:02,340 --> 01:36:05,009 Now it's Sunday. it's over. 1306 01:36:25,655 --> 01:36:32,287 There's such a lot of world to see 1307 01:36:32,370 --> 01:36:36,207 Where was the parent? Why aren't the parents involved? 1308 01:37:25,506 --> 01:37:27,216 I know. 1309 01:37:29,218 --> 01:37:31,846 I know, I know. It sounds crazy. 1310 01:37:31,929 --> 01:37:33,723 Talking about... 1311 01:37:33,806 --> 01:37:36,768 finding a crack in time over the East River. 1312 01:37:41,564 --> 01:37:44,942 But in point of fact, Gretchen... 1313 01:37:46,986 --> 01:37:49,989 it is no more crazy than... 1314 01:37:50,073 --> 01:37:53,242 a dog finding a rainbow. 1315 01:37:55,578 --> 01:37:57,538 Dogs are color-blind, Gretchen. 1316 01:37:58,915 --> 01:38:01,000 - They don't see color. - Really? 1317 01:38:01,084 --> 01:38:03,252 Just like we can't see time. 1318 01:38:03,336 --> 01:38:04,921 We can feel it. 1319 01:38:05,588 --> 01:38:08,549 We can feel it passing, but we can't see it. 1320 01:38:08,633 --> 01:38:10,802 It's just a blur. 1321 01:38:10,885 --> 01:38:12,428 It's like- 1322 01:38:13,012 --> 01:38:16,933 it's like we're riding in a supersonic train... 1323 01:38:17,016 --> 01:38:20,269 and the world is just blowing by. 1324 01:38:21,437 --> 01:38:23,981 But imagine if we could stop that train, Gretchen. 1325 01:38:25,024 --> 01:38:29,570 Imagine if we could stop that train, get out, look around... 1326 01:38:29,654 --> 01:38:31,948 and see time for what it really is. 1327 01:38:33,241 --> 01:38:35,451 A universe... 1328 01:38:35,535 --> 01:38:38,579 a world, a thing as unimaginable... 1329 01:38:38,663 --> 01:38:41,707 as color to a dog. 1330 01:38:41,791 --> 01:38:44,043 And as real and tangible... 1331 01:38:44,127 --> 01:38:46,295 as that chair you're sitting in. 1332 01:38:48,256 --> 01:38:51,050 If we could see it like that- 1333 01:38:51,134 --> 01:38:53,094 I mean, really look at it... 1334 01:38:53,177 --> 01:38:54,887 then... 1335 01:38:55,972 --> 01:38:59,475 maybe we could see the flaws as well as the form. 1336 01:39:03,396 --> 01:39:05,314 And that's it. 1337 01:39:06,315 --> 01:39:07,859 It's that simple. 1338 01:39:07,942 --> 01:39:10,153 That's all I discovered. I'm just a- 1339 01:39:12,029 --> 01:39:14,615 just a guy who saw a crack in a chair... 1340 01:39:14,699 --> 01:39:16,451 that no one else could see. 1341 01:39:18,661 --> 01:39:21,706 I'm that dog who saw a rainbow. 1342 01:39:22,707 --> 01:39:24,417 Qnly... 1343 01:39:28,171 --> 01:39:30,840 none of the other dogs believe me. 1344 01:39:34,886 --> 01:39:36,888 I believe you. 1345 01:40:21,265 --> 01:40:26,020 I can see that some things have happened... 1346 01:40:26,103 --> 01:40:27,772 since I went away. 1347 01:40:28,856 --> 01:40:30,358 But... 1348 01:40:33,402 --> 01:40:35,404 you have to go back. 1349 01:41:02,431 --> 01:41:05,351 You understand you'll be going back to the same day you left- 1350 01:41:05,434 --> 01:41:07,019 - April 28. - Yes. 1351 01:41:07,103 --> 01:41:10,147 So you understand you might be repeating a few things. 1352 01:41:10,231 --> 01:41:12,441 You might even see me. 1353 01:41:12,525 --> 01:41:14,527 Just don't follow me this time. 1354 01:41:19,991 --> 01:41:21,951 Can I go in? 1355 01:41:25,788 --> 01:41:27,707 J-J-, you asked to see me? 1356 01:41:27,790 --> 01:41:29,667 Come on in. 1357 01:41:31,877 --> 01:41:35,673 I understand you put out a fire at the shoot yesterday. 1358 01:41:35,756 --> 01:41:38,134 Guess Mr. Dul 01:41:40,303 Yeah. 1360 01:41:41,637 --> 01:41:45,308 I'm going to England this week, and I made a decision. 1361 01:41:47,518 --> 01:41:49,687 You're going to be the top New York honcho. 1362 01:41:50,730 --> 01:41:53,983 So, this is going to be your office. 1363 01:41:54,066 --> 01:41:56,319 I'll be making it official tonight. 1364 01:41:58,487 --> 01:42:00,990 Thank you, 1.]. Thank you. 1365 01:42:01,907 --> 01:42:03,576 You earned it. 1366 01:42:04,327 --> 01:42:07,913 I'm heading over tojansen to sign the buy-out papers- FTC stuff- 1367 01:42:07,997 --> 01:42:11,083 so I'll see you later at the thing. 1368 01:42:12,168 --> 01:42:13,919 - What did he say? - I got it. 1369 01:42:14,003 --> 01:42:15,630 Oh, my God! That's wonderful! 1370 01:42:15,713 --> 01:42:18,049 Just give me one second. I'm sorry, Darci. One second. 1371 01:42:22,595 --> 01:42:25,264 Hi. You've reached Stuart. Please leave a message. 1372 01:42:25,848 --> 01:42:27,600 Hello? 1373 01:42:27,683 --> 01:42:31,687 Leopold, I don't know where you are, but if you're there, please pick up. 1374 01:42:33,356 --> 01:42:35,316 I got it. 1375 01:42:36,359 --> 01:42:38,527 I got the job. 1376 01:42:38,611 --> 01:42:43,616 I'm the new senior vice president at CRG. 1377 01:42:44,116 --> 01:42:45,743 Please call me. 1378 01:42:46,827 --> 01:42:49,497 I'm sorry about the way things came down yesterday. 1379 01:42:49,580 --> 01:42:51,207 I apologize. 1380 01:42:51,999 --> 01:42:56,462 I really need to see you. I'd love to see you tonight, but I have this thing at Farmer's Bounty. 1381 01:42:56,545 --> 01:42:58,839 But I'd love to see you later. 1382 01:42:59,382 --> 01:43:01,384 I miss you. 1383 01:43:01,467 --> 01:43:03,260 I miss you. 1384 01:43:05,971 --> 01:43:07,807 Hey, Stuart. 1385 01:43:07,890 --> 01:43:09,392 How you feeling? 1386 01:43:17,775 --> 01:43:19,276 Where's Leo? 1387 01:43:20,403 --> 01:43:21,904 He went home. 1388 01:43:51,976 --> 01:43:53,644 He was for real. 1389 01:43:57,189 --> 01:43:58,858 He was for real. 1390 01:44:10,619 --> 01:44:12,121 Holy shit! 1391 01:44:13,748 --> 01:44:15,458 Look at this! 1392 01:44:25,801 --> 01:44:27,636 Oh, my God. 1393 01:44:34,393 --> 01:44:36,729 Chilled. Do you understand? Chilled. 1394 01:44:36,812 --> 01:44:39,607 And be sure to leave another case of the Chéteau Lafite. 1395 01:44:39,690 --> 01:44:41,650 - Yes, sir. - Leopold! 1396 01:44:41,734 --> 01:44:44,028 Leopold! Where have you been? 1397 01:44:44,987 --> 01:44:47,615 Otis, I demand explication. It's half past 5:00. 1398 01:44:47,698 --> 01:44:50,534 - He's not even dressed. - He'll be ready, my lord. I assure you. 1399 01:44:50,618 --> 01:44:53,287 I don't want him ready. I want him resplendent! 1400 01:44:53,370 --> 01:44:56,457 This is the invitation. You've got your table number, your car number... 1401 01:44:56,540 --> 01:44:58,542 and I've got Morty down there- the guy you like. 1402 01:44:58,626 --> 01:45:01,086 He's on the Madison side. Also, your phone sheet is in here. 1403 01:45:01,170 --> 01:45:04,381 And Stuart called you a couple times. Have a great time tonight. 1404 01:45:04,465 --> 01:45:06,467 You look beautiful. 1405 01:45:44,129 --> 01:45:47,758 I don't think this is right. I'm supposed to be going to 2640 Madison. 1406 01:45:47,842 --> 01:45:49,969 That's where we are, Miss McKay. 1407 01:45:52,054 --> 01:45:53,889 Have a nice evening. 1408 01:45:54,431 --> 01:45:56,433 - Hi. - Hello. 1409 01:45:56,517 --> 01:45:58,727 - Hi. Invitation, please. - Kate McKay. 1410 01:45:59,311 --> 01:46:00,813 Sorry! 1411 01:46:04,358 --> 01:46:06,819 No, no, no. Look, they're still plugs. 1412 01:46:06,902 --> 01:46:10,155 They'rejust randomly seeded with Minoxidil. No cornrows. 1413 01:46:10,239 --> 01:46:11,824 - Excuse me. - Hey, Kate. 1414 01:46:11,907 --> 01:46:14,076 - Congratulations. - Thank you. 1415 01:46:14,159 --> 01:46:17,079 To hell with the face-lifts. I'm into mini-lifts now. 1416 01:46:17,162 --> 01:46:19,290 Just a tiny little bit each year. 1417 01:46:19,373 --> 01:46:22,501 I hear they're bringing back the 840 next year, so I'm just running out my lease. 1418 01:46:22,585 --> 01:46:24,253 - Kate, congratulations. - Thanks, Bob. 1419 01:46:25,921 --> 01:46:28,048 - Hey, Kate. -j.j. Hello, Barry. 1420 01:46:28,132 --> 01:46:29,800 - Congratulations. - Thank you. Thank you very much. 1421 01:46:29,884 --> 01:46:31,552 Anyway, I'm just glad they've got 'em fixed. 1422 01:46:31,635 --> 01:46:35,264 - I was gonna move my office down to the lobby. - Right. 1423 01:46:37,057 --> 01:46:38,601 Excuse me. 1424 01:46:41,103 --> 01:46:43,188 Kate, don't powder your nose for too long. 1425 01:46:43,272 --> 01:46:45,774 - I gotta give this speech in a couple minutes. - Okay. 1426 01:46:49,111 --> 01:46:52,239 All this time I thought that I had pretzled fate... 1427 01:46:52,323 --> 01:46:53,991 and that it had to be untwisted. 1428 01:46:54,074 --> 01:46:57,244 But what I never considered is that the whole thing is a pretzel. 1429 01:46:57,912 --> 01:47:01,165 A beautiful 4D pretzel of I 01:47:03,834 Get off Park as soon as you can, and then go up Madison. 1431 01:47:03,918 --> 01:47:06,045 I was supposed to go back. 1432 01:47:06,128 --> 01:47:08,923 He was supposed to come forward, then he was supposed to go back again... 1433 01:47:09,006 --> 01:47:10,507 and... 1434 01:47:11,300 --> 01:47:12,801 so was she. 1435 01:47:14,970 --> 01:47:17,598 Now it is my pleasure and honor... 1436 01:47:17,681 --> 01:47:21,185 to turn this over to my friend,j.j. Camden. 1437 01:47:23,062 --> 01:47:25,064 Thanks, Bill. Terrific. 1438 01:47:25,147 --> 01:47:27,149 What an amazing evening. 1439 01:47:32,571 --> 01:47:36,408 The device you were jabbering about- to take priests to the bell tower. 1440 01:47:36,492 --> 01:47:38,827 You speak of progress and invention... 1441 01:47:38,911 --> 01:47:42,206 but what I offer you downstairs is reality. 1442 01:47:42,957 --> 01:47:45,167 Take a wife. Marry. 1443 01:47:45,250 --> 01:47:47,628 Let us not bother with this banter, Uncle. 1444 01:47:47,711 --> 01:47:49,380 Tell me whom you want me to marry. 1445 01:47:49,463 --> 01:47:51,131 Who has the most money. 1446 01:47:51,799 --> 01:47:53,175 Well. 1447 01:47:53,258 --> 01:47:55,886 That would be Miss Tree of the Trees of Schenectady. 1448 01:47:55,970 --> 01:47:58,555 Good. Consider it done. 1449 01:47:59,515 --> 01:48:02,685 Otis, fetch the ring. I will announce at midnight. 1450 01:48:03,811 --> 01:48:05,104 Invitation, please. 1451 01:48:05,187 --> 01:48:06,772 Hello. My name is Stuart Besser. 1452 01:48:06,855 --> 01:48:09,775 I'm sorry. I know we're not on your list, but his sister is Kate McKay. 1453 01:48:09,858 --> 01:48:12,528 - She works here. - I'm sorry, sir. I can't just let you in. 1454 01:48:17,199 --> 01:48:20,786 ...that I learned that there was one thing that I could do... 1455 01:48:20,869 --> 01:48:25,124 and it didn't require money, and it didn't require a fancy school. 1456 01:48:25,833 --> 01:48:28,335 I learned that I could please people. 1457 01:48:28,419 --> 01:48:31,422 And there is nothing wrong with that! 1458 01:48:31,505 --> 01:48:33,882 I am a people pleaser, people! 1459 01:48:37,386 --> 01:48:40,097 Thank you so much. I am so jazzed! 1460 01:48:40,180 --> 01:48:41,974 - Kate! - Stuart! 1461 01:48:42,057 --> 01:48:44,226 Charlie! What are you doing? 1462 01:48:44,309 --> 01:48:46,895 - Kate, I think you should look at these pictures. - No, no, no! 1463 01:48:46,979 --> 01:48:50,566 It's time to introduce the woman who's going to be holding down the fort in our New York offices- 1464 01:48:50,649 --> 01:48:53,902 our own little rising star, Miss Kate McKay! 1465 01:48:53,986 --> 01:48:56,613 - I can't look at pictures now. - Listen to me for a second, please. 1466 01:48:56,697 --> 01:48:59,116 - They're introducing me downstairs now! - I'm sorry I was a lousy boyfriend. 1467 01:48:59,199 --> 01:49:00,826 I'm sorry I let you down. 1468 01:49:00,909 --> 01:49:03,704 I know all you wanted was someone you could trust, someone you could believe in. 1469 01:49:03,787 --> 01:49:07,750 - I can't talk about our relationship now. - Kate,just listen to me, okay? Please! 1470 01:49:07,833 --> 01:49:10,544 - Maybe we weren't such a waste of time after all. - Kate? 1471 01:49:10,627 --> 01:49:14,173 - Maybe there's a reason I was your guy. - What are you talking about? 1472 01:49:14,256 --> 01:49:18,761 Maybe I was supposed to help you find your guy- Leopold. 1473 01:49:18,844 --> 01:49:20,345 Kate? 1474 01:49:20,429 --> 01:49:23,974 You gotta go back, Kate. You gotta go back there. 1475 01:49:26,143 --> 01:49:29,063 Go back? How? 1476 01:49:29,813 --> 01:49:33,442 You have tojump off the Brooklyn Bridge within the next 23 minutes. 1477 01:49:34,193 --> 01:49:35,736 Kate? 1478 01:49:36,779 --> 01:49:37,821 Katie. 1479 01:49:37,905 --> 01:49:39,656 Kate,just look at the pictures, okay? 1480 01:49:55,130 --> 01:49:57,841 Is there a Kate McKay in the house? 1481 01:49:57,925 --> 01:50:00,594 - Yeah. Here I am! - Kate? 1482 01:50:02,471 --> 01:50:04,473 Here she is. Here she is. 1483 01:50:05,474 --> 01:50:10,354 Without further ado, the new senior vice president of our New York offices. 1484 01:50:10,437 --> 01:50:12,689 Here she is, ladies and gentlemen... 1485 01:50:12,773 --> 01:50:14,316 Kate McKay. 1486 01:50:18,028 --> 01:50:19,613 - You okay? - Yeah. 1487 01:50:19,696 --> 01:50:21,406 - Sorry. Thank you. - That's okay. 1488 01:50:21,490 --> 01:50:23,617 - Thank you. - Quite an entrance, huh? 1489 01:50:23,700 --> 01:50:25,577 Thank you, 1.]. Thank you very much. 1490 01:50:25,661 --> 01:50:27,246 Thank you. Thank you. 1491 01:50:27,329 --> 01:50:28,831 Wow. 1492 01:50:28,914 --> 01:50:31,875 This is a great night. 1493 01:50:32,835 --> 01:50:35,963 We here at CRG... 1494 01:50:36,046 --> 01:50:39,424 have always considered ourselves to be in the “Find what people want” business... 1495 01:50:39,508 --> 01:50:43,762 and atjansen, you guys are in the “Make what people want” business. 1496 01:50:43,846 --> 01:50:46,723 So imagine what we can do together. 1497 01:50:47,432 --> 01:50:51,061 We'll be able to find out exactly what people want... 1498 01:50:51,145 --> 01:50:53,438 and make it... for them. 1499 01:50:53,522 --> 01:50:56,441 So... yeah. So our customers... 1500 01:50:57,526 --> 01:51:00,904 will be able to get exactly... 1501 01:51:07,953 --> 01:51:09,204 what they- 1502 01:51:12,583 --> 01:51:14,251 they want. 1503 01:51:40,903 --> 01:51:42,070 And... 1504 01:51:44,573 --> 01:51:48,577 it's a great thing to get what you want. 1505 01:51:48,660 --> 01:51:50,454 It's a really good thing. 1506 01:51:50,537 --> 01:51:53,999 Unless what you thought you wanted wasn't really what you wanted... 1507 01:51:54,082 --> 01:51:56,210 because what you really... 1508 01:51:57,085 --> 01:51:58,587 wanted... 1509 01:51:59,421 --> 01:52:02,841 you couldn't imagine, or you didn't think it was possible. 1510 01:52:06,345 --> 01:52:08,722 But what if someone came along... 1511 01:52:08,805 --> 01:52:12,100 who knew exactly what you wanted without asking? 1512 01:52:12,184 --> 01:52:14,269 They just knew, like they could... 1513 01:52:14,811 --> 01:52:18,774 hear your heart beating or listen to your thoughts. 1514 01:52:19,524 --> 01:52:21,944 And what if they were sure of themselves... 1515 01:52:22,611 --> 01:52:24,780 and they didn't have to take a poll... 1516 01:52:24,863 --> 01:52:26,949 and they loved you... 1517 01:52:27,491 --> 01:52:29,910 and you hesitated? 1518 01:52:35,624 --> 01:52:38,669 And... I have to go. 1519 01:52:43,298 --> 01:52:45,259 I'm sorry, but I have to go. 1520 01:52:47,970 --> 01:52:49,471 Kate? 1521 01:52:55,310 --> 01:52:56,770 Stuart. 1522 01:52:56,853 --> 01:53:01,149 Can you tell me in short, complete sentences featuring no words over two syllables... 1523 01:53:01,233 --> 01:53:03,527 why exactly I am in these pictures? 1524 01:53:03,610 --> 01:53:05,404 - Probably not. - Try. 1525 01:53:05,487 --> 01:53:07,781 - Because you were there. - I wasn't. I would remember. 1526 01:53:07,864 --> 01:53:09,741 Believe me, I would remember if I was there. 1527 01:53:09,825 --> 01:53:12,411 - Because you're going to be there. - If we get there in time. 1528 01:53:12,494 --> 01:53:15,289 These are pictures of the past, not the future. 1529 01:53:15,372 --> 01:53:16,540 Not exactly. 1530 01:53:16,623 --> 01:53:20,585 Theoretically speaking, if you go to the past in the future, then your future lies in the past... 1531 01:53:20,669 --> 01:53:24,006 and that is a picture of you in the future in the past. 1532 01:53:25,465 --> 01:53:27,551 We have to make a run for it. Let's go. 1533 01:53:29,511 --> 01:53:31,263 Come on! Come on! 1534 01:53:31,847 --> 01:53:33,307 Let's go. Let's go. Come on! 1535 01:53:33,390 --> 01:53:35,267 Where the hell do you think you're going? 1536 01:53:35,350 --> 01:53:37,352 6.80 on the meter, pal. 1537 01:53:39,062 --> 01:53:41,064 It's gonna close, Kate! Come on! 1538 01:53:49,072 --> 01:53:52,075 Ladies and gentlemen, may I have your attention? 1539 01:53:52,159 --> 01:53:55,704 The duke of Albany will be making a very important announcement... 1540 01:53:55,787 --> 01:53:58,749 in 2O minutes from this very stage. 1541 01:53:58,832 --> 01:54:00,917 And I believe it shall be an announcement... 1542 01:54:01,001 --> 01:54:05,339 that will justify the playing of a bridal waltz. 1543 01:54:05,881 --> 01:54:07,257 Good heavens! 1544 01:54:13,805 --> 01:54:16,350 - Okay. This is the hard part. - What? 1545 01:54:16,433 --> 01:54:18,143 - The girder. - The girder? 1546 01:54:18,226 --> 01:54:19,853 You have to cross the girder, Kate. 1547 01:54:22,439 --> 01:54:23,857 That girder? 1548 01:54:25,150 --> 01:54:28,987 - Stuart, I can't cross that girder. - You love him, right? 1549 01:54:29,071 --> 01:54:31,323 - What? - Leopold. 1550 01:54:32,074 --> 01:54:33,909 You love him, right? 1551 01:54:35,786 --> 01:54:37,120 Yeah. 1552 01:54:37,746 --> 01:54:40,207 That's all you need to know. Now go. 1553 01:54:40,290 --> 01:54:42,209 - You'll be fine. - Katie. 1554 01:54:42,834 --> 01:54:45,003 Charlie. Charlie, what am I- How are you gonna- 1555 01:54:45,087 --> 01:54:46,797 No, don't worry about me. 1556 01:54:47,923 --> 01:54:49,091 Now, Kate. 1557 01:54:49,174 --> 01:54:50,884 - Now? - The portal's gonna close. 1558 01:54:50,967 --> 01:54:52,386 - All right. - Go. 1559 01:54:52,469 --> 01:54:53,970 All right. 1560 01:54:54,554 --> 01:54:56,348 Jesus. 1561 01:54:57,057 --> 01:54:58,600 Oh, God. 1562 01:54:58,683 --> 01:55:01,937 You can do it. Don't look down. 1563 01:55:07,109 --> 01:55:08,568 Shit. 1564 01:55:24,584 --> 01:55:26,086 Charlie? 1565 01:55:28,839 --> 01:55:30,799 I'll love you forever. 1566 01:55:32,467 --> 01:55:34,344 I love you. 1567 01:55:38,140 --> 01:55:39,641 It's okay. 1568 01:55:44,479 --> 01:55:46,606 Lady. Lady, what are you doing? 1569 01:55:46,690 --> 01:55:48,358 - Step back, lady. - It's okay. 1570 01:55:48,442 --> 01:55:50,318 - Wait, wait, wait! - Come back, lady. 1571 01:55:54,614 --> 01:55:56,741 Central, be advised. This is Breech Post Four. 1572 01:55:56,825 --> 01:55:59,619 - I've got a jumper on the bridge. - Shit. 1573 01:55:59,703 --> 01:56:03,457 Have a supervisor, ESU and Harbor respond to this location forthwith. 1574 01:56:24,186 --> 01:56:28,106 Ladies and gentlemen, it is with a glad heart and a bright eye... 1575 01:56:28,190 --> 01:56:31,485 that I proudly introduce my beloved nephew... 1576 01:56:31,568 --> 01:56:34,237 Leopold, duke of Albany. 1577 01:56:34,321 --> 01:56:38,408 Thank you. Thank you, Uncle Millard. Thank you. 1578 01:56:38,492 --> 01:56:41,745 - I'm sorry, madam. This is a private affair. - No, you don't seem to understand. 1579 01:56:41,828 --> 01:56:44,831 I need to get inside. I need to get inside right now and- 1580 01:56:44,915 --> 01:56:46,791 What seems to be the problem? 1581 01:56:46,875 --> 01:56:48,585 Are you Otis? 1582 01:56:48,668 --> 01:56:50,212 Let us proceed. 1583 01:56:50,295 --> 01:56:52,339 Please raise your glasses... 1584 01:56:53,256 --> 01:56:55,842 so we may toast to my bride-to-be- 1585 01:56:56,968 --> 01:56:58,803 the woman whose welfare and happiness... 1586 01:56:58,887 --> 01:57:01,765 - shall be my solemn duty to maintain. - Sorry. Excuse me. Sorry. 1587 01:57:03,558 --> 01:57:06,228 The future duchess of Albany- 1588 01:57:10,524 --> 01:57:12,025 Kate McKay. 1589 01:57:16,988 --> 01:57:19,074 Of the McKays of- 1590 01:57:21,243 --> 01:57:22,953 Massapequa. 1591 01:57:25,539 --> 01:57:27,374 Massapequa. 1592 01:57:36,091 --> 01:57:38,426 - I love you. - I love you. 125896