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NETFLIX PRESENTS

There's a barber in Barcelona

who only shaves people from Barcelona

who do not shave themselves.

But here comes the paradox:

the barber…

also lives in Barcelona.

So, the barber will shave himself

if, and only if, he doesn't shave himself.

This is a contradiction

in which "alpha" is only true in the case…

of "not alpha."

Welcome to the world of self-referential paradoxes,

which we will discover in Philosophy of Language.

Hi, Oti.

At last you answer a friend's call.

Sorry, I took a holiday after the thing with Etienne.

I understand, it was so unexpected…

Pol, man, we miss you.

Biel can't stop looking at my boobs.

I miss you too.

We just started "Philo" of Language.

Can I use your notes?

If you come to get them.

Get them ready, I'll go today.

THE STORK

Pol!

What?

Nothing, I was wondering…

if you're going to school today.

Yes. The faculty strike's finished.

And how are you doing at the car park?

As usual. My boss is a pain in the ass.

I'm off. Have a nice day.

All right. I'll also be late today.

A young chess master

is teaching us some moves.

Really? My goodness!

Bye, see you! -See you later.

Don't give me that look.

Once you start lying, it's hard to stop.

Yeah…

I'd tell her the truth

if I was as brave as you are.

Hello.

Hi, how are you? -You smoke, right?

Yes, take one.

I ran out of cigarettes.

Sorry to disturb your art.

It's nothing.

Do you smoke in here? -Yes.

Don't worry. It's under control. -No, no.

I prefer to light it up outside.

I see why you left my class.

You're the only one who can fix stuff here.

Maybe I'll sneak away.

Sneak away… That sounds good.

They say Metaphysics is also nice.

You can audit any class you want.

Isn't metaphysics most important in philosophy?

Not necessarily.

Well, ethics have existed since the beginning of humankind.

Metaphysics is about what already existed.

It's like the real philosophy.

Are your parents alive?

Yes.

I'll kill them tonight.

Tomorrow, you and I will talk about metaphysics.

Alfonso!

Alfonso!

Alfonso!

What the hell!

Are you deaf or what?

What are you doing, madam?

Why did you touch my underwear?

Well, I was doing the laundry.

You know very well that's Herminia's job.

OK.

You know, I usually do the laundry at my house.

I'm not your wife.

Do not touch my panties.

OK, all right, I'm sorry.

Oh, and pick up that plant I dropped.

Jesus, what a…

You! I hope you are giving Alfonso a push.

Pol Rubio, it's about time.

Where have you been?

I took a break.

It was hard to accept my dad's situation.

I see.

I gave you a hard time.

I made such a scene, man!

That's OK, it's cool.

Home life is weird.

Gloria's still upset over the tax fine.

Are you OK?

I'm fucking great. -Good.

I even took a wealthy holiday, just like you.

Look who's here!

Hello. -Hey!

It was about time. -Hi.

How are you? You thought I dropped out?

No way, I'll study my heart out!

What's up, Biel? -Not much.

Let's celebrate and have dinner at my place, OK?

Wow, caviar!

Come after you're off work. -I don't work there anymore.

The boss fired me. I didn't get renewed.

I'm looking for a job.

No way! You know, maybe Ángel can help you out.

Ángel who? The guy from Satanassa? -Yes.

He helped with "Philosoparty" and has cool ideas.

Well, the thing is that, as a waiter, he makes

a hundred euro in tips.

Wow! -Jesus, that's not bad.

I wish I could find a job, too.

You live off your dad.

Oh… -I'll call him,

I won't get a grant after that Ethics test.

Look, the missing man.

How are you?

How are you? You OK?

You were a little upset. -Oh, I'm fine.

I had a fight with Rai over something stupid.

I made such a scene… -It's all right.

I loved seeing you that way.

Oh, really? Wow…

Yeah, I mean, you look like a tough guy,

but I saw you are vulnerable too.

You love miserable people?

Did I say miserable? -No, no, but…

You like seeing people having a bad time?

You're a little sensitive.

No, people are not made of stone.

And I saw that you aren't either.

No, of course not.

We could meet.

That would be nice.

Are you free today?

I'm meeting a friend today to look for a job.

I hope you're lucky.

We'll see.

I'm off to Bolaño's class. What are you up to?

Will you come or do you have to work?

I have to work.

First-year students are less prepared every year.

And you are even worse.

Yes!

For you, everything started after you were born.

You don't care about what brought you here.

You're primitive creatures, full of superfluous information.

Come on, forget the barricades.

Saying this to you was useful

as an introduction to ask you the following question:

would ethics exist if we were completely honest?

I don't think so. -Why?

Because life would be chaotic if we always spoke the truth.

That is, the lack of honesty helps us

to uphold order and avoid living as savages.

Dostoevsky wrote:

"If human beings told their most intimate secrets,

there would be a dirty, unbreathable smell in the world."

That's disgusting.

Yes.

I think ethics would exist even if we decided to be…

absolutely sincere.

Explain yourself.

I don't know…

I think that human beings tend to overcome

the worst of circumstances.

So, for pure survival,

wouldn't new ethics be created?

Certainly.

And the ethics would require a balance between telling the truth

and doing what's right.

Because "ethics" is not a synonym for "truth",

even if it is just as necessary as the air we breathe.

Yes, Joaquim Torné's son is in charge,

the master carpenter.

Now he's retired in Empordá…

and he left his business to Axel.

He'll have quite a career.

Axel!

Axel!

Hello.

Hello. Could you call Axel, please?

The members of the board are here.

I think he's in class.

Oh, that's true, we gave them an empty room

so they could store material.

This way, they have more space…

I see.

As soon as we make peace,

you ask me for something.

But I love this table.

Laura, I'm not buying you any furniture,

you and Víctor don't have a flat yet.

That's because you don't like any.

Oh, you're such a pain.

Most flats in Barcelona are shit.

Hi. -Hi.

Do you remember me?

Of course I remember you.

How are you? -Fine, you?

Come on, wait for me in the library.

All right…

So? Do you want to review the exam?

I wanted to ask if you would let me retake it.

Did you forget the pubic hair and want to raise your grade?

María, I fucked up.

I had a mental blank.

But I need to pass Ethics to get a grant.

You should've thought of that.

You won't believe me,

but I am an upright professor.

I'm not asking you to just pass me,

only… to let me retake the test.

I could do it today.

I will not give you favorable treatment,

no matter how much Iberian ham you give me.

Do you think this is a whim?

I'm not well, María. -I know that.

I can see it. That makes two of us.

But I can't let you retake the exam.

Had I known, I'd have cheated like others.

Excuse me?

Who cheated?

I won't tell you.

You tell me right now who cheated on a María Bolaño exam.

And I'll forget my professional ethics

so you can retake the test.

Sit, it will be just a moment.

Yes, sure.

Wow! Yes, that's great!

I'm so happy, I didn't expect this.

No wonder! You got an A!

Yes, yes.

Cross out the one.

Cross out the one.

But why?

I sure enjoyed watching you cheat with your phone.

And I've looked forward to this moment.

Seeing your face go from joy to misery.

Look, I…

It's not… I'm sorry.

Your explanations are so boring.

I just asked you one thing, and I said it twice,

don't make me say it a third time.

Madam…

Do you have to come in like a ghost?

Sorry. -What do you want?

We did not discuss my contract.

Again! Talk to Rai.

It's just that I cannot get paid cash-in-hand.

And another thing…

Could I leave early today?

Look, Gloria, my partner,

has no idea that I'm working here

to pay my debt to the Tax Office.

I can't think of any other excuse to cover why I'm not at home.

I wouldn't like Gloria to get mad.

I am a widow.

I've been alone for too long in my life.

You can leave whenever.

Say goodbye to the job.

I get to the main hall with the board,

and they told me you were auditing a class.

And I found this shit.

Doctor Llorenç, let's talk.

I won't be remembered as the rector who burned the hall down.

Your father told me I should watch you.

He said that?

And I confirmed it when we spoke today.

Did you tell him? -That's the first thing I did.

I don't doubt your talent, kid,

but the fact you smoked near such old wood is unacceptable.

You are free to go.

How do you know that butt was mine?

Isn't it yours? Whose is it?

A worker's?

No, not at all.

There are many people here.

You have a good sense of humor, Jesus!

You want me to look foolish.

That butt is not mine, nor my team's.

You should investigate before accusing.

You want me to investigate?

All right, I'll investigate.

Axel, who smoked in the main hall?

Look, I'll put it this way.

Do you want this job?

Whose butt is it?

I was about to fire Axel.

Axel?

Yes, he's auditing your class.

I thought it was him who smoked in the main hall,

but I know it was you.

Hey… -No, no. Don't deny it. I know.

Look at the carpenter…

You're a university chair and can't be fired,

but I can warn you.

Why would you warn me?

I know what you are going through.

Anxiety, distress, overcoming so much, great.

But if you do something that upsets me,

then we have a problem.

María,

you will not burn my main hall down.

Next time, I will pull all the necessary strings

so they send you home to smoke.

Unbelievable. I got an F.

Playing with Bolaño is very risky.

She first gave me an A, but then…

I don't get it, that's so mean.

Easy. I'll help you study for the next test.

I have some nice techniques.

Cute. Shall we start today?

OK, come to my place.

With Arnau there? No, you come to my flat.

No, no… No.

What the fuck, Rai?

You're an asshole, Rai.

You scared me to death.

I have some firecrackers.

We'll use them after dinner. -Dinner?

I ordered sushi for everybody.

Let's meet at nine, OK?

I'm too upset to eat.

Come on… -I got an F in Ethics.

Biel will teach me study techniques.

Rai, it takes 45 minutes to get there.

Come on, that's not true.

What's the celebration?

I want to have dinner.

You can give me ideas to decorate, I sold the San Pedro.

What? -No way!

Yes. -But you loved that painting!

Well, not anymore.

Don't take it personally. We'll meet another day.

Freeze the sushi.

A two-meter flat bed?

Ferran will not find you at night!

No! I sent him the location yesterday!

She doesn't want to be found.

You are so mean!

Not at all! We are falling in love again.

And what about you? I feel bad talking about Ferran.

You are so lonely…

I'm proudly single. You know that.

And you, Vicky? Isn't it time you find someone?

Excuse me.

Madam, I'm leaving.

I left some soup in the fridge.

Oh, Alfonso, we had plenty of soup.

Yes, but it's not from the shop, I cooked it.

I even added chicken bones.

It's "Alfonso's special touch."

Well, that's all.

Enjoy your time and excuse me.

Well, well, well…

Who's this old man?

Alfonso is Henry's replacement.

Just the replacement around the house.

Oh, OK… -He's quite old, isn't he?

I hope he won't fall down the stairs.

Well, he doesn't look very fit. -Rai insisted a lot,

it's only a few months…

He seems nice, right?

And he cooked soup with "Alfonso's touch."

Can you ask for more?

Yeah, but the chicken bones…

It's better not to explain those things, right?

Are you praying?

I broke every ethical principle.

How so?

By telling the truth.

Damn.

Well, I did the opposite. I broke ethics by telling a lie.

But in class, you said

it's survival.

Yes, or selfishness.

"Ego te absolvo."

I listened to your mother.

And the first thing you do is start this place on fire?

About time you showed up.

I asked the rector to give you another chance.

For the record, I didn't do it for you,

but for your grandfather, for me,

for the company.

Your problem is that you don't accept the way I work.

Your way is smoking in here

and attending some classes.

Jesus, that's too bad.

You love to ridicule me.

That's how you made me feel: ridiculous.

Look, the rector knows I didn't smoke.

Yes, he told me.

It was a professor, right?

I don't know if that woman smoked in here,

but I'm sure you did. I know you.

Passion,

sacrifice,

satisfaction.

You lack those three things.

Well, if you study while listening to Baroque music,

your brain kind of expands, you know?

But does it have to be Baroque music?

Hello?

My mom.

What's the problem? -My mom!

OK, act like we're studying,

open the book, get some paper and do stuff.

This is Lluisa, my mom. -Hello.

I'm helping Biel study. What do you want?

Oti, your father is so worried.

He keeps talking about you.

We think you are lost.

And all because I left Arnau?

Honey, I can't talk in front of this kid.

Oh, I'll go. -You stay there!

We're not together, he's gay.

You seem like a good student.

Oh, yes.

And you, Oti? -She got an A in Ethics.

Isn't that right? An A!

You failed Ethics.

Mom, enough.

You are failing your subjects.

Tell me the truth. I can't tell lies, and if you want help

with your dad… -I failed a test.

What? You never failed?

I won't tell Dad,

but when he has to pay your tuition next course

and finds out, he'll cut you off.

Mom, why don't you leave?

Oh, Oti…

Do you really like philosophy?

Do you know what you want to do?

After so much work with termites,

he ended up behaving like one.

I didn't mean…

Stop with the "I didn't mean." You did.

OK, I did mean it.

Then be clear, dammit!

I meant to save my ass by unfairly accusing you.

You have this bad temper

that we all need to survive.

I guess I do.

Storks do it, why wouldn't you?

Storks are mean to their offspring.

Is it tiring to feed three little birds?

Let's throw the weakest one out and… problem solved!

That's what it's all about.

Axel!

You were right. The Metaphysics class

with Silvia Montoliu is worth it.

She was my student.

I hope you don't plan to come to class again

with that belt pouch.

OK, Ángel. I'll see you at Satanassa.

Don't worry. I know it's not definite.

Yes. Bye. Thanks!

They arrived today. They are Russians.

Why do tourists always laugh?

Let someone laugh, at least. Because here…

There are many secrets lately.

I'm not stupid.

Alfonso doesn't care about chess.

He got fined by the Tax Office.

7000 euro.

He's working at Rai's.

He's ashamed to tell you.

Hello.

Hi. Is Ángel around?

I'm here!

Kevin, get the bill for tables 2 and 4! Will you?

Well, well, my Discobolus! How are you?

Fine. -Come, you'll meet Dino.

Who's Dino?

The owner of the place, darling.

He's performing, but you'll talk later.

I see. Is he a good guy?

Well, he's special.

He may look at you and hire you straight away or…

Sorry.

He may talk to you and not be interested.

I see.

Give me a hand, man.

Sure! But first…

you need to smile, as if this was Disney World.

Bravo! -Come on, come.

I've seen things…

you wouldn't believe.

I've seen…

the attack of a group of macho men in the seats of an adult theater.

I've seen the sun rays

glimmer in Las Ramblas, near the Liceo gates.

All those moments will be lost in time, like tears…

down the drain of some toilet in Chinatown.

All hail my tuberose!

Some of you know my mother died a month ago.

I know there's a rumour around Gayland,

and I'm happy to let you down, you hyenas of Babylon,

because it's not true…

that I've decided to spend my savings on cloning my mother.

No. I'm not Barbra Streisand nor is my mother Sammy the dog.

You too. We have something in common.

Well, two things, right? We both are republicans.

Hello?

That's why I don't reach climax with men.

Arnau, are you annoying Amy?

Oti, shut up.

I'm a democrat, that has nothing to do

with supporting guns.

Well, we'll be in my room,

I'm showing her… some study techniques.

By the way, I mean,

the climax thing, were you serious?

I don't know, I think I freeze around penises.

I try, I give my all, but I can't reach it.

It's normal for your mom to ask what you want to do.

She wanted to be an asshole and she succeeded.

Don't say that.

OK.

I don't know. I'm sick of my parents.

And they threaten me with getting divorced,

but they wouldn't do that. -I see.

Never mind.

Look, I don't know what I'll do,

but I know how I want to live.

So…

How do you want to live?

Just like anyone else.

I don't want to be a workaholic.

You know? I want an easy and fun life.

And now I want to fuck.

Oh. -What?

I saw how you looked at me.

It's time we touch each other.

Can I touch your boobs?

I'll touch your cock.

Guys, I remember this memorable day.

Dino and I were walking on a secondary motorway

in Almendralejo.

1985?

1984? -That's it.

Then, two policemen

arrested us.

They were so handsome. -Yes, but we were lucky.

Huh?

Jesus! Both of them were active. -Oh…

Dino, sorry to interrupt.

I'd like to introduce a friend.

A Philosophy student named Pol.

Surname? Dancer. Mr Pole Dancer.

Penny, please!

Hi. -He came to see your show

and he wants to be a waiter,

in case we need him.

He's disciplined, responsible,

nice, smart… -OK, OK.

Relax, my Venezuelan Tommy gun.

Sit down.

Make some room.

Hello, hello. -Hello.

So, you like to serve drinks. -Yes.

Do you prepare cocktails?

Of course.

How are your Bloody Marys?

Delicious.

Why does a Philosophy student want to work here?

If I told you that I really need the money,

I'd be telling half the truth.

Then tell me the truth, the whole truth,

and I'll be satisfied.

I think too much at school.

Oh, and we don't think here.

As you can see, your physique

is not important to work here.

But a study by the University of Chicago reveals

that contemplation of beauty causes thirst.

I can confirm.

Stand up.

What are you wearing under your jacket?

A T-shirt.

Take your jacket off.

Go to the bar.

In two hours,

I'll check in and see how many drinks you served.

Oh my goodness.

What a cutie!

Three shots of tequila. OK.

Go ahead.

Tequila. -Tequila. Thanks!

A beer?

Don't shave.

I need the buffalo-hunter type.

Do I have the job?

I'll teach you something.

Loyalty is a feeling that overcomes ambition.

Honestly, I think you're quite a slut.

Just don't let me down.

I don't like to feel betrayed.

Then I can't work here.

I'm a little traitor.

I betrayed my dad today,

and a friend of mine. She failed a test because of me.

I put on an act for people all day,

especially the person I like most.

And I can't make a Bloody Mary.

I'm trying to survive.

Come with me.

Put four ice cubes in the cocktail shaker.

Add some vodka.

OK. Now, the blood.

A pinch of salt…

five drops of Tabasco sauce…

Perrins sauce…

Enough. -Enough?

Yes.

A little pepper.

And shake.

Slow down, boy.

Easy, as if you were massaging the balls of Zeus himself.

Now serve.

You close today.

Me?

So you know I trust you.

I don't like Pol.

I'll call you…

Apollo.