Original subtitles

- I let Lucifer out, I gotta put him back in. - Yes.

Sammy is long gone.

Sam has been locked in the cage...

...with Michael and Lucifer.

It's his soul. It's gone.

I can't erase Sam's hell, but I can put it behind a wall.

Keep digging, Dean.

- Are you gonna be cryptic or...? - It's about the souls.

I will save Sam...

...but only if you stand down.

- What happened to you? - I'm at war.

I wanna discuss a simple business transaction, that's all.

You wanna make a deal?

- With me? - It's the souls.

They're all inside me.

Millions upon millions of souls.

Angel blade won't work because I'm not an angel anymore.

I'm your new God.

You will bow down and profess your love...

...unto me, your Lord...

...or I shall destroy you.

Well, all right then.

Is this good or you want the whole forehead to the carpet thing?

Guys.

Stop.

What's the point if you don't mean it?

You fear me.

Not love, not respect. Just fear.

- Cass... - Sam, you have nothing to say to me.

You stabbed me in the back.

Get up.

- Cass, come on. This is not you. - The Castiel you knew is gone.

So, what then? Kill us?

What a brave little ant you are. You know you're powerless.

You wouldn't dare move against me again. That would be pointless.

So I have no need to kill you.

Not now.

Besides, once, you were my favorite pets before you turned and bit me.

- Who are you? - I'm God.

And if you stay in your place, you may live in my kingdom.

If you rise up, I will strike you down.

Not doing so well, are you, Sam?

I'm fine.

- I'm fine. - You said you'd fix him.

- You promised. - If you stood down...

...which you hardly did.

Be thankful for my mercy. I could have cast you back in the pit.

Cass, come on, this is nuts.

You can turn this around, please.

I hope for your sake this is the last you see me.

Sam, you okay?

Understand.

If you followed Raphael, if you stood against me...

...punishment is certain.

There is nowhere to hide.

The rest of you...

...our Father left a long time ago.

That was hard.

I thought the answer was free will.

But I understand now.

You need a firm hand.

You need a father.

And I am your father now.

Be obedient, children...

...or this will be your fate.

It is a new day...

...on Earth and in heaven.

Rejoice.

Come on.

Come on, baby.

So you fixing her or primal screaming?

Yeah.

Thanks.

Sam?

- He's still under but alive. - Oh, yeah?

What about God part deux?

I got all kinds of feelers out. So far, diddly.

And what exactly are you looking for?

Exactly. What?

Miracles, mass visions, trench coat on a tortilla?

- I don't know what I'm looking for. - Ah, well, he'll surface.

So say we do suss out...

...where New and Improved flew off to. Yeah?

Hell we plan to do about it?

Well, I don't know, Bobby. I got no more clue than you do.

I don't even know what book to hit for this.

Well, figure it out.

I'm sorry.

This ain't in no book.

If you stick your neck out, Cass steps on it.

So you know what I'm gonna do?

What?

I'm gonna fix this car.

Because that's what I can do.

I can work on her till she's mint.

And when Sam wakes up, no matter what shape he's in...

...we glue him back together too.

We owe him that.

I'm with you.

Hey, Dean.

Oh, you're, uh, walking and talking.

Yeah. I, uh...

I put on my own socks. Whole nine, heh.

Well, that's, um...

- I mean, uh, you sure you're okay? - Yeah.

My head hurts a little, but basically...

- Seriously? - I'm as surprised as you are...

...but, yeah, I swear. Good.

No reason to put the gift horse under a microscope, right?

Yeah. So, what happened with Cass?

- Help me with the car, I'll fill you in. - Okay.

Plenty speak for them and their so-called lifestyle.

Media, Hollywood.

Lady Gaga won't shut up for love or money.

Yeah, funny. But that's why we raise our voices...

...and picket their so-called weddings and their funerals.

Someone has to speak for God.

And who says you speak for God?

You're wrong. I am utterly indifferent to sexual orientation.

On the other hand...

...I cannot abide hypocrites like you, Reverend.

- Okay, fun is over, friend. - Tell your flock...

...where your genitals have been before you speak for me.

- And who the heck are you? - I'm God.

And he who lies in my name shall choke on his own false tongue.

And his poisonous words shall betray him.

- Mister. - For I am the Lord...

...your God.

Castiel.

Cass.

Sam.

No. No, no, no, this can't be happening.

Sam.

Sammy.

Hey, Sam?

What, are you taking a nap down here?

- It's Cass, we think. Come on. - Yeah.

Coming.

Sudden deaths of some 200...

...religious leaders are currently under investigation.

The Vatican has yet to issue a statement.

But some are already calling this an act of God.

We all saw him, no beard...

...no robe.

He was young and...

And sexy.

He had a raincoat.

Believed to be targeted hits high up...

...in white supremacy organizations.

The FBI now believes the Ku Klux Klan has been forced...

- ... to disband. - Can't argue with that one.

Freak lightning strike on the heels of the fire...

...that burned down the Center for Vibrational Enlightenment today.

Said a spokesman, " This tragedy represents the largest loss...

...in New Age motivational speaker history."

- Motivational speakers? - Yeah.

I'm not sure new Cass gets irony any better than old Cass.

Of course, old Cass wouldn't smite Madison Square Garden...

...just to prove a point. He is off the deep end of the deep end.

And there's no slowing down.

So what? Try to talk to him again?

- Sam... - All we can do is talk to the guy.

He's not a guy, he's God. And he's pissed.

And when God gets righteous, get out of the way.

- Haven't you read the Bible? - I guess.

Cass is never coming back.

He's lied to us, used us, cracked your gourd like it was nothing.

- No more. We've spent enough on him. - Okay.

Hand me that socket wrench.

In biblical times.

Leprosy was once so prevalent, colonies were found around the world.

Today, we're witnessing the unprecedented shutdown...

...of India's leper colonies...

...after what many are calling a miracle healing.

Here with us, health correspondent, Rob Lewitski.

Educate me, Lewitski.

And now someone else Is gettin' all your best

Hello, Crowley.

These boots are made for walking

You look stressed.

And that's just what they'll do

Bollocks.

These boots Are gonna walk all over you

So the jig is up.

- You found me. - I never lost you.

These scratches, they're all useless.

Still, can't blame a girl for trying.

- You fancy a drink before you smite me? - No.

You like to bend them right over, do you?

Let's go.

I'm not going to kill you, Crowley. I have plans for you.

- What? - Here's our new arrangement.

I let you live, you return to your post as king of hell.

- But? - But I choose where each soul goes.

- But... - I control the flow...

...and you take whatever I give you.

I take it you intend to keep the lion's share.

So, what you're saying is hell is being downsized.

I would've done away with it...

...but I need a threat to hold over my enemies.

And we need to keep Michael in Lucifer's cage.

Right.

- I gather this is not a, uh, negotiation. - No.

Then I graciously accept, boss.

I'll be in touch.

Dean?

Bobby?

She's looking good. Considering.

Considering?

I should do this professionally.

So, you seen Sam lately?

Yeah, why?

What? Well, spit it out.

How is that kid even vertical?

- I mean, Cass broke his damn pi�ata. - I know.

I mean, I get how he came to help us, back at the lab.

Adrenaline. Sure.

But now?

He says he's okay.

How?

I don't know. I just pray to God it's true.

We need to come up with a new saying for that.

Seriously, though, Bobby. I mean, look at our lives.

How many more hits can we take?

So if Sam says he's good, good.

You believe that?

Yeah.

No.

You wanna know why?

Because we never catch a break. So why would we this time?

But just...

Just this one thing, you know?

But I'm not dumb.

I'm not gonna get my hopes up just to get kicked in the Daddy pills again.

Hey.

Oh. How you feeling?

- Can't complain, heh. - Great.

- What's the word? - A publishing house...

...literally exploded about an hour ago.

The body count is getting up there. We gotta do something.

What we gotta do is hunt the sumbitch.

Unfortunately, I lost my God gun...

Is there some kind of heavenly weapon?

I mean, maybe something out of that angel arsenal that Balthazar stole?

There's gotta be something that can hurt him.

He's God, Sam.

There's nothing.

But there might be someone.

No.

No, no!

Come on.

Don't act so surprised.

My new boss is gonna kill me for even talking to you lot.

Lucky we're not stabbing you, you piece of...

Wait, wait, wait.

- What new boss? - Castiel, you giraffe.

Is your boss?

Is everybody's boss.

What do you think he'll do when he finds out we've been conspiring?

You do wanna conspire, don't you?

No. We want you to stand there and look pretty.

- Listening. - We need a spell...

...to bind Death.

Bind?

- Enslave Death? You having a laugh? - Lucifer did it.

- That's Lucifer. - A spell is a spell.

You really believe you can handle that horsepower? You're delusional.

Death is the only player left that has the kind ofjuice to take Cass.

They'll both mash us like peas.

- Why help on a suicide mission? - Look...

...you want Cass running the universe?

Some help, please.

Please?

Help?

Some help, please.

God bless you, sir.

You're a true believer.

People say I'm wrathful.

But I only punish liars and those who forsake me.

I am ajust God.

Excuse me?

See.

Oh, my God.

I can see.

Your face.

What's wrong with you?

Mistake.

Too late.

Let us out.

Let us out.

Let us out!

No.

Hello?

It's from Crowley.

Who feels like hog-tying Death tonight?

Old age is overrated anyhow.

We got most of this stuff, but we have to make a run...

...for a few things. Like?

Like an act of God crystallized forever.

- What's that supposed to mean? - Thinking actual crystal.

See, lightning strikes sand at the right angle...

...it crystallizes into the perfect shape of itself.

Lightning. Act of God.

Jenga.

You got yourself a fulgurite. We're gonna need a biggie.

And let me guess. Rare.

I found the records of an auction.

Winning bidder lives about nine hours from here.

Hey.

Excuse me, got any Grey Poupon?

Grey Poupon? Seriously?

It's what popped in my head.

Hi.

Uh...

I don't wanna hurt you.

- Really. - I'm the one with the firearm, son.

I get that.

Okay.

Yeah. Good.

Hey, guys.

Uh, so this is Dr. And Mrs. Weiss.

Hi.

- Sorry. - I found the God thingy.

Well, let's light this candle.

You're welcome.

Um...

Hello?

Death?

You're joking.

Sorry, Death. This isn't what it seems.

Seems like you bound me.

For good reason, okay? Just, uh, hear us out.

Um...

Fried pickle chip?

The best in the state.

That easy to soothe me, you think?

This is about Sam's hallucinations, I assume?

- What? - Sorry, Sam, one wall per customer.

- Now unbind me. - We can't.

Yet.

This isn't gonna end well.

We need you to kill God.

- Pardon? - Kill God.

You heard right, Your Honor.

- What makes you think I can do that? - You told me.

Why should I?

Because we said so and we're the boss of you.

I mean, respectfully.

Amazing.

- Cass. - I didn't want to kill you.

- But now... - You can't kill us.

You've erased any nostalgia I had for you.

Death is our bitch.

We ain't gonna die, even if God pulls the trigger.

Annoying little protozoa, aren't they?

God?

You look awfully like a mutated angel to me.

Your vessel is melting. You're going to explode.

No, I'm not.

When I've finished my work...

- ...I'll repair myself. - You think you can...

...because you think you're simply under the weight of those souls.

But that's not the worst problem.

There are things much older than souls in purgatory...

...and you gulped those in too.

Irrelevant.

- I control them. - For the moment.

Wait. Uh, what older things?

Long before God created angel or man, he made the first beasts.

The Leviathans.

Leviathans?

I personally found them entertaining...

...but he was concerned they'd chomp the entire Petri dish.

So he locked them away.

Why do you think he created purgatory?

To keep those clever, poisonous things out.

Now, Castiel has swallowed them.

He's the one thin membrane between the Old Ones and your home.

- Enough. - Stupid little soldier you are.

Why?

Because I dared open a door that he shut?

Where is he?

I did a service taking his place.

Service?

- Settling petty vendettas? - No.

I'm cleaning up one mess after another, selflessly.

- Quite the humanitarian. - And how would you know?

What are you really?

A flyswatter?

Destined to swat you, I think.

Unless I take you first.

Really bought his own press, this one.

Please, Cass...

...I know God.

And you, sir, are no God.

All right, put yourjunk away, both of you.

Look, call him what you want, just kill him now.

All right, fine.

Thank you.

Shall we kickbox now?

I had a tingle I'd be reaping someone very, very soon.

Don't worry, not you.

Well, he was in a hurry.

Yes, that's exactly why I'm running again. To save my constituents...

...from the godless policies of my opponents.

Couldn't have said it better myself.

- Sir, can I help you? - I'm here to see the senator.

Um...

- Regarding? - Abuse of power.

- Excuse me? - I'm not petty.

I'm punishing a woman...

...who causes poverty and despair in my name.

I put your needs first, don't you understand?

All of you.

I am a better God than my father.

How can I make you understand?

Ahem. Um...

Shut up, Dean.

I'm not here to tie your shoes every time you trip.

I warned you about those souls how long ago?

Long enough to stop that fool.

Here we are again, with your little planet...

...on the edge of immolation.

Well, I'm sorry, all right?

I've been trying to save this planet.

So maybe you should find somebody better to tip off.

Maybe I should spend my effort on a better planet.

Well, it's been amusing.

Wait, hold on. Hold on. Just...

Give us something. You have to care...

...about what happens to us. You know, I really don't.

But I do find that little angel arrogant.

Great, let's go with that.

Your only hope is to have him return it all to purgatory.

Quickly.

We need a door.

You have everything you need at that lab.

Get him to return there...

...and compel him to give up the power.

- Compel? - Figure it out.

But that door only opens in the eclipse. And that's over.

I'll make another.

Three fifty-nine, Sunday morning...

...just before dawn.

Be punctual.

Don't thank me.

Clean up your mess.

Try to bind me again...

...you'll die before you start.

Nice pickle chips, by the way.

No.

No.

You want some coffee with that?

- Oh, it's 6 p.m. Somewhere. - We gotta hit the road.

How are we supposed to get Cass to that lab by friggin' 3:59 a. M?

We don't.

- What do you mean? - We can't bring the horse to water...

...and we can't make it drink. Why fool ourselves?

Dean, look. I know you think that Cass is gone.

- That's because he is. - He's not.

He's in there somewhere, Dean.

- I know it. - No, you don't.

I don't. But I was pretty far gone sometimes myself...

...you never gave up on me. Turns out...

...that you're about the same open book as you've always been.

Hallucinations?

Really? I gotta find out from Death?

What was I supposed to do?

How about not lie?

How about tell me that you've got crazy crap...

...climbing those walls? Why?

You can't help.

You got a lot of pretty severe crap swinging your way lately, I thought...

What, I thought why burst the one good bubble you had left?

It's under control.

What?

- What's under control? - I know what's real, what's not.

- Sam. - Look, we can debate this...

...once we deal with Cass.

Know how I'm gonna deal?

I'm gonna stuff my pie hole, I'm gonna drink.

And I'm gonna watch some Asian cartoon porn...

...and act like the world is about to explode because it is.

Hey. You gotta be kidding me.

"Massacre at the campaign office...

...of an incumbent senator by a trenchcoated man."

There's security footage.

Well, I think reaching Cass is, uh, out of the cards.

Hey, Castiel, um...

Maybe this is pointless.

Look, heh, I don't know if any part of you even cares...

...but, um, I still think you're one of us deep down.

I mean, way, way, way off the reservation...

...but, look, we still have till dawn to stop this.

Let us help.

Please.

Only if you turn that off.

Sam?

- Cass. - I heard your call.

I need help.

We need the right blood. There's a small jar.

End of the hall, supply closet.

Got it.

Dean.

- What, you need something else? - No.

I feel regret.

About you and what I did to Sam.

Yeah, well, you should.

If there was time, if I was strong enough, I'd fix him now.

I just wanted to make amends before I die.

Okay.

Is it working?

Does it make you feel better?

No.

You?

Not a bit.

I know it all seems so silly, doesn't it?

Hi, Sam.

Long time no spooning.

You're not here. You're in hell.

Now, that...

...you're right on.

Meat hooks...

...chains...

...you.

It's not real.

It's just my brain leaking memories from the cage.

Because of the wall breaking down.

That's all.

Mm, that's very good, your little theory.

It's wrong.

Sam, this isn't you going guano.

Everything else is.

- What? - Everything.

From the second you sprung out of that lock box.

- That's impossible. - No.

Escaping was impossible.

I have to say...

...I think this is my best torture yet.

Make you believe that you're free, and then:

Yank the wool off of your eyes.

You never left, Sam.

You're still in the cage.

With me.

Hang in there.

Just a couple of minutes.

Where's Sam? It's go time.

Sam?

Damn it.

That's good enough.

Okay.

Step right up, Cass.

I'm sorry, Dean.

Cass?

He's cold.

Is he breathing?

No.

Maybe angels don't need to breathe.

He's gone, Dean.

Damn it.

Cass, you child.

Why didn't you listen to me?

Cass?

Hey. Hey.

Okay. All right.

That was unpleasant.

- Let's get him up. - Easy there. Unh.

I'm alive.

Looks like.

I'm astonished.

Thank you. Both of you.

We were mostly just trying to save the world.

I'm ashamed.

I really overreached.

- You think? - I'm gonna find some way...

...to redeem myself to you.

Well, one thing at a time, come on. Let's get you out of here, come on.

I mean it, Dean.

Okay.

All right. Let's go find Sam.

You need to run now!

- I can't hold them back. - Hold who back?

They held on inside me.

They're so strong.

- Who the hell...? - Leviathan.

I can't fight them!

Run!

Go get Sam. Go get Sam.

Too late.

Cass?

Cass is, hmm.

He's gone. He's dead.

We run the show now.

Ah!

Now, this is going to be so much fun.