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1
00:00:24,984 --> 00:00:26,277
(ELEVATOR BELL DINGS)
2
00:00:26,361 --> 00:00:27,737
(ELEVATOR DOOR OPENS)
3
00:00:38,831 --> 00:00:41,167
Where you going? Come here.
4
00:00:42,710 --> 00:00:44,045
(BOTH MOANING)
5
00:00:45,338 --> 00:00:46,839
(BOTH BREATHING HEAVILY)
6
00:00:48,508 --> 00:00:49,842
Wait, wait, wait.
7
00:00:50,134 --> 00:00:53,513
Sorry. You're right.
We barely know each other.
8
00:00:53,846 --> 00:00:56,015
Maybe we should
have a drink and talk.
9
00:00:56,349 --> 00:00:57,475
Actually...
10
00:00:58,017 --> 00:00:59,561
...my zipper just got
caught on my necklace.
11
00:00:59,644 --> 00:01:02,355
But if you want to talk,
we can. Sure.
12
00:01:03,147 --> 00:01:04,691
Okay, great.
13
00:01:05,191 --> 00:01:06,859
Or we can talk after.
14
00:01:08,027 --> 00:01:09,362
Yeah.
Yeah.
15
00:02:58,596 --> 00:02:59,931
(GIGGLING)
16
00:03:06,437 --> 00:03:07,814
Come on!
No!
17
00:03:08,106 --> 00:03:10,483
Let me tag along for a drink.
You said I'd like it.
18
00:03:10,650 --> 00:03:11,943
It's too soon.
19
00:03:12,318 --> 00:03:14,821
Once you meet my dad
and I meet your friends,
20
00:03:14,946 --> 00:03:16,447
they become
a part of this...
21
00:03:16,823 --> 00:03:18,991
...and I just want to stay in
our bubble a little longer.
22
00:03:19,158 --> 00:03:20,493
It's been eight weeks.
23
00:03:20,785 --> 00:03:21,869
You keeping track?
24
00:03:24,497 --> 00:03:26,332
Happy Anniversary
(GASPS)
25
00:03:27,375 --> 00:03:29,001
I saw it and...
26
00:03:29,293 --> 00:03:30,670
...I thought of you.
27
00:03:31,963 --> 00:03:33,131
Open it.
28
00:03:39,345 --> 00:03:40,680
(ALARM RINGING)
29
00:03:41,723 --> 00:03:43,933
KATE: Good morning.
(G ROANS)
30
00:03:44,142 --> 00:03:46,644
Why do I schedule
breakfast meetings?
31
00:03:46,978 --> 00:03:48,479
For the bacon, I think.
32
00:03:48,646 --> 00:03:50,356
But you need to
lay off that until
33
00:03:50,481 --> 00:03:52,150
your cholesterol's down.
Why not turkey?
34
00:03:52,316 --> 00:03:54,694
Screw turkey.
I like pig.
35
00:03:55,027 --> 00:03:57,363
Well, I heard
a story on the news...
36
00:03:57,697 --> 00:04:00,825
...about a guy who ate an
undercooked pork chop and...
37
00:04:01,159 --> 00:04:04,829
...got a worm that made his
brain swell up super fast.
38
00:04:04,912 --> 00:04:05,913
Uh-huh.
39
00:04:05,997 --> 00:04:09,876
And to relieve the pressure, they had
to cut out a chunk of his skull.
40
00:04:10,209 --> 00:04:11,294
Oh, wow.
41
00:04:11,377 --> 00:04:15,590
Like a triangle of his skull, they
cut it right out of his head...
42
00:04:15,840 --> 00:04:18,342
...and they implanted it
in his groin...
43
00:04:18,593 --> 00:04:20,261
...so it wouldn't die.
44
00:04:20,511 --> 00:04:22,513
Otherwise,
his brain would have...
45
00:04:22,764 --> 00:04:24,932
...his head
would have exploded.
46
00:04:25,016 --> 00:04:26,058
Mmm-hmm.
47
00:04:26,142 --> 00:04:27,685
The skull was
holding his brain...
48
00:04:28,019 --> 00:04:32,356
...which was swelling, and his
head would have just exploded.
49
00:04:33,566 --> 00:04:36,402
Just think of that
next time you eat pig bacon.
50
00:04:36,569 --> 00:04:37,737
I will.
51
00:04:40,198 --> 00:04:41,365
Here you go.
52
00:04:41,616 --> 00:04:42,950
Thanks, sweetie.
(DOG BARKING)
53
00:04:44,744 --> 00:04:45,787
(GROANS)
(GASPS)
54
00:04:45,953 --> 00:04:47,121
Thunder
55
00:04:47,205 --> 00:04:48,206
He needs training.
56
00:04:48,456 --> 00:04:50,458
I'm taking him to
obedience school today.
57
00:04:50,792 --> 00:04:53,377
Oh! And we need a check
for the painter, too.
58
00:04:53,628 --> 00:04:56,714
That reminds me, I need
you to sign these, honey.
59
00:04:56,964 --> 00:04:58,424
What are they?
60
00:04:58,549 --> 00:05:00,051
Oh, just some stuff
for the accountant.
61
00:05:03,054 --> 00:05:04,639
I don't even
understand this.
62
00:05:04,722 --> 00:05:06,140
I can't even read
these anymore.
63
00:05:06,224 --> 00:05:09,602
I already read it for us.
You just have to sign.
64
00:05:09,894 --> 00:05:11,854
No, I really
don't understand this.
65
00:05:11,979 --> 00:05:13,940
I feel like I need
to go to brain camp.
66
00:05:14,273 --> 00:05:15,775
Like, a brain camp.
67
00:05:16,108 --> 00:05:18,736
Where they give you
exercises for your brain?
68
00:05:19,111 --> 00:05:20,780
When people have
lazy eyes...
69
00:05:21,113 --> 00:05:22,782
...they get
their eyes worked out
70
00:05:22,907 --> 00:05:24,617
so they don't
have to wear glasses.
71
00:05:24,700 --> 00:05:25,701
Mmm-hmm.
72
00:05:25,785 --> 00:05:27,245
They should have
that for your brain.
73
00:05:27,328 --> 00:05:28,454
Like a brain camp.
74
00:05:28,746 --> 00:05:31,749
You could go lay on
a beach and get tan
75
00:05:31,958 --> 00:05:33,417
and drink gingko
balboa all day.
76
00:05:33,751 --> 00:05:35,461
You come back and
you're super smart.
77
00:05:36,003 --> 00:05:39,298
It's gingko biloba.
Balboa was Rocky.
78
00:05:40,633 --> 00:05:45,012
Right. See? See? That's why
I need to go to brain camp.
79
00:05:45,555 --> 00:05:46,764
(ELEVATOR BELL DINGS)
80
00:05:52,311 --> 00:05:53,646
Any messages?
81
00:05:54,272 --> 00:05:58,150
I don't think so. I've kind
of been in the zone here.
82
00:05:58,484 --> 00:05:59,944
You weren't going
to mention these?
83
00:06:00,111 --> 00:06:02,488
Why? They're the
first things you see.
84
00:06:03,322 --> 00:06:06,492
Micromacks? I thought Dave Cohen
was handling this merger.
85
00:06:06,826 --> 00:06:08,828
No. The client said
he was too emotional.
86
00:06:08,953 --> 00:06:10,997
They wanted a ruthless
law robot, so...
87
00:06:11,289 --> 00:06:13,207
I got Micromacks.
88
00:06:13,291 --> 00:06:15,293
Get Dave on the phone. I need
all pertinent materials...
89
00:06:15,459 --> 00:06:18,337
...and a set of
dates for deposition.
90
00:06:18,629 --> 00:06:20,131
Why do you work so hard?
91
00:06:20,673 --> 00:06:23,676
The point of being pretty
is that you don't have to.
92
00:06:23,801 --> 00:06:25,678
You don't see me worrying
about my job, do you?
93
00:06:25,845 --> 00:06:27,346
Unfortunately, no.
94
00:06:27,638 --> 00:06:30,558
That's because I have a Stan, okay?
He works.
95
00:06:30,975 --> 00:06:33,686
I come here because it's
like a hobby that pays well.
96
00:06:34,020 --> 00:06:36,480
Oh, by the way,
your dad called...
97
00:06:36,689 --> 00:06:40,151
...to confirm that you and he were
still on for drinks with "Mark."
98
00:06:41,694 --> 00:06:43,821
Who's Mark?
The guy I'm seeing.
99
00:06:43,988 --> 00:06:46,365
Obviously, but which one?
The only one.
100
00:06:46,699 --> 00:06:48,200
There's one guy?
101
00:06:48,534 --> 00:06:50,703
And you're calling
him Mark?
102
00:06:50,870 --> 00:06:52,538
You never
use their names!
103
00:06:52,830 --> 00:06:55,082
So, Model Man Boy
and Dr. Not So Smart...?
104
00:06:55,166 --> 00:06:56,125
Gone.
105
00:06:56,208 --> 00:06:57,209
The Hot Rabbi?
106
00:06:57,293 --> 00:06:59,170
And the Hot Rabbi's Cousin?
Cut them loose.
107
00:06:59,420 --> 00:07:00,588
You cleared the roster.
108
00:07:00,713 --> 00:07:01,881
I cleared the bench.
109
00:07:02,173 --> 00:07:03,132
Wow.
110
00:07:03,215 --> 00:07:05,384
You haven't dated
just one guy in a long time.
111
00:07:05,676 --> 00:07:08,054
It's not a big deal.
It's very new.
112
00:07:08,554 --> 00:07:12,558
No jinxies. I get it. It's good
that Mark doesn't have a nickname.
113
00:07:12,892 --> 00:07:15,895
It means he's still viable.
You haven't rejected him.
114
00:07:16,187 --> 00:07:17,521
He's not a donor kidney.
115
00:07:17,688 --> 00:07:19,398
Not the organ
I was thinking of.
116
00:07:22,068 --> 00:07:23,069
(HORN HONKING)
Hello?
117
00:07:23,235 --> 00:07:24,904
Hi. Red or white?
118
00:07:25,196 --> 00:07:27,239
Red or white what?
Wine.
119
00:07:27,531 --> 00:07:28,532
Did you forget?
120
00:07:28,741 --> 00:07:30,576
Forget what?
Dinner with Phil.
121
00:07:31,243 --> 00:07:32,912
You told me
that was next week.
122
00:07:33,245 --> 00:07:36,082
I said next week
last week so it's this week.
123
00:07:36,415 --> 00:07:37,917
I got to work tonight.
124
00:07:38,209 --> 00:07:41,379
Again? This is
the third night this week!
125
00:07:41,712 --> 00:07:45,299
The guys want to do dinner. So
I'll stay in the city tonight.
126
00:07:45,758 --> 00:07:48,761
Why don't I meet you
after your meeting?
127
00:07:49,387 --> 00:07:52,765
I'll drive in to meet you in
the city after your meeting!
128
00:07:53,099 --> 00:07:54,392
No, you don't
want to do that.
129
00:07:54,558 --> 00:07:55,893
I don't mind!
130
00:07:56,102 --> 00:07:57,436
We'll have so much fun!
131
00:07:57,728 --> 00:07:59,939
We'll go to that hot chocolate
place in the morning.
132
00:08:00,064 --> 00:08:02,108
We'll cuddle
and sleep in.
133
00:08:02,400 --> 00:08:04,276
Screw it.
I'm coming home.
134
00:08:04,568 --> 00:08:06,404
Really? Aw!
Really.
135
00:08:06,570 --> 00:08:08,447
Family comes first. I'll
see you when I get back.
136
00:08:08,572 --> 00:08:09,949
I'll make a steak
and salad--
137
00:08:10,241 --> 00:08:11,742
Shit!
138
00:08:12,410 --> 00:08:14,412
MARK: Wow,
look at you!
139
00:08:16,288 --> 00:08:18,416
How are you?
Not too great.
140
00:08:18,624 --> 00:08:19,709
Oh, what's wrong?
141
00:08:19,834 --> 00:08:20,918
The housekeeper called.
142
00:08:21,127 --> 00:08:23,796
A pipe burst in the bathroom--
I have to go handle it.
143
00:08:24,088 --> 00:08:26,590
Oh, no! You're going
to Connecticut now?
144
00:08:26,924 --> 00:08:29,260
I got to. There's two feet
of water in my basement.
145
00:08:29,593 --> 00:08:31,429
I can go with you.
That'd be fun.
146
00:08:31,637 --> 00:08:33,973
No, you go see your dad.
147
00:08:34,265 --> 00:08:36,100
I'll see if he can
meet tomorrow night.
148
00:08:36,308 --> 00:08:38,144
I won't be back
tomorrow night.
149
00:08:39,603 --> 00:08:41,272
And what about
meeting my dad?
150
00:08:43,274 --> 00:08:46,110
I'm sorry, baby.
I have to take a rain check.
151
00:08:46,444 --> 00:08:47,445
Yeah, okay.
152
00:08:47,653 --> 00:08:49,321
Don't be mad.
I'm not being anything.
153
00:08:49,613 --> 00:08:50,656
What do you
want me to do?
154
00:08:50,781 --> 00:08:51,782
Go to Connecticut.
155
00:08:52,116 --> 00:08:54,118
Really?
Yeah, really.
156
00:08:54,452 --> 00:08:55,619
Okay.
157
00:08:55,703 --> 00:08:56,954
Call me when you're
done being pissed.
158
00:08:57,204 --> 00:08:58,789
That might be a while.
159
00:09:00,166 --> 00:09:02,334
(INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS)
(JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING)
160
00:09:07,840 --> 00:09:09,675
Hi, hon.
161
00:09:10,843 --> 00:09:14,180
Here, you want this?
I'm switching to vodka.
162
00:09:14,263 --> 00:09:15,556
Ugh!
163
00:09:15,639 --> 00:09:16,974
Who orders gin?
164
00:09:17,349 --> 00:09:20,978
Uh, I couldn't read the menu because
I left my glasses at Nina's.
165
00:09:21,353 --> 00:09:22,855
Want to know
who Nina is?
166
00:09:23,147 --> 00:09:24,231
Not really.
167
00:09:24,356 --> 00:09:25,483
Indian girl.
Beautiful.
168
00:09:25,733 --> 00:09:27,651
Soft skin.
We met at Trader Joe's.
169
00:09:27,818 --> 00:09:29,737
She told me about
this naan bread.
170
00:09:29,987 --> 00:09:31,322
When did you
start eating naan?
171
00:09:31,572 --> 00:09:34,909
She's 24, a dance major. I eat
anything she tells me to.
172
00:09:34,992 --> 00:09:36,327
Ew!
173
00:09:38,746 --> 00:09:39,997
Where's your guy?
174
00:09:40,164 --> 00:09:41,415
I think we just broke up.
175
00:09:41,665 --> 00:09:43,334
No! How come?
176
00:09:43,584 --> 00:09:46,253
A pipe burst in his house and
he went back to Connecticut.
177
00:09:46,504 --> 00:09:48,839
And where in the story
does he act like a jerk?
178
00:09:49,090 --> 00:09:50,257
It's how he handled it.
179
00:09:50,508 --> 00:09:51,717
You're being paranoid.
180
00:09:51,842 --> 00:09:53,010
No, something feels off.
181
00:09:53,260 --> 00:09:56,013
And when I get this feeling,
I'm usually always right.
182
00:09:56,263 --> 00:09:59,100
Oh, please! Every relationship
I've ever had, something felt off.
183
00:09:59,350 --> 00:10:01,894
That's probably why you're
wrapping up divorce number five
184
00:10:01,977 --> 00:10:04,188
with one of my
sorority sisters.
185
00:10:07,274 --> 00:10:09,026
You really like
this guy, huh?
186
00:10:09,777 --> 00:10:12,196
So forget all this bullshit
and go surprise him.
187
00:10:12,446 --> 00:10:13,948
It's not bullshit.
It is.
188
00:10:14,198 --> 00:10:17,118
Put on something sexy, get
your ass out to Connecticut...
189
00:10:17,368 --> 00:10:19,453
...and fix that
young man's plumbing.
190
00:10:42,059 --> 00:10:43,769
Don't worry,
you look good.
191
00:10:44,103 --> 00:10:45,563
He'll love it.
Who?
192
00:10:46,438 --> 00:10:47,773
Whoever.
(CHUCKLES)
193
00:10:49,066 --> 00:10:50,943
Here you go.
Thanks for the ride.
194
00:10:52,236 --> 00:10:53,529
Need me to wait?
195
00:10:53,654 --> 00:10:54,947
Nah, I think I got it.
196
00:11:14,300 --> 00:11:15,426
(KNOCKING)
197
00:11:16,886 --> 00:11:18,220
(CLEARS TH THROAT)
198
00:11:21,974 --> 00:11:23,100
Hi.
Hi.
199
00:11:23,309 --> 00:11:24,977
I'm looking for Mark.
200
00:11:25,269 --> 00:11:27,104
Oh. What's this about?
201
00:11:27,605 --> 00:11:29,815
I'm Carly. You must
be his housekeeper.
202
00:11:30,107 --> 00:11:32,109
No, I'm his wife, Kate.
203
00:11:36,822 --> 00:11:39,325
Is this some kind of
stripper-gram or something?
204
00:11:40,367 --> 00:11:41,744
Oh.
205
00:11:42,494 --> 00:11:44,622
No. No. I have
the wrong address.
206
00:11:44,747 --> 00:11:46,832
I'm looking for
a different Mark.
207
00:11:48,000 --> 00:11:49,001
Mark Kink.
208
00:11:49,627 --> 00:11:50,628
Mark King?
209
00:11:50,836 --> 00:11:52,463
No! No, no.
210
00:11:52,713 --> 00:11:54,840
He's a short guy? Bald?
211
00:11:55,216 --> 00:11:57,468
Lives a couple of
streets over on Clark.
212
00:11:57,843 --> 00:11:58,844
There is no Clark Street.
213
00:11:58,969 --> 00:12:00,012
Anyway"
214
00:12:00,221 --> 00:12:01,639
Ooh!Ah!Ah!
215
00:12:01,805 --> 00:12:02,973
Oh, my God!
216
00:12:03,974 --> 00:12:05,017
Shit.
217
00:12:07,978 --> 00:12:10,481
Um. I'll send you
a check for your urn.
218
00:12:11,106 --> 00:12:12,149
(PANTING)
219
00:12:22,159 --> 00:12:23,661
Can't forget this.
220
00:13:02,366 --> 00:13:03,367
(GRUNTS)
221
00:13:11,041 --> 00:13:12,376
What happened?
222
00:13:12,793 --> 00:13:15,963
It must be big. You were crazy
about him two days ago.
223
00:13:16,213 --> 00:13:19,967
It can't be the sex-- you were a lot
nicer and your hair was more shiny.
224
00:13:20,217 --> 00:13:22,386
He has a wife, okay?
He's married.
225
00:13:22,803 --> 00:13:24,471
You don't think
you can take her?
226
00:13:24,722 --> 00:13:27,224
That's not the point.
I don't do married guys.
227
00:13:27,308 --> 00:13:29,393
I don't need to wreck
someone's home for a date.
228
00:13:29,601 --> 00:13:31,729
It's not always a wreck. Stan
and I were married when we met.
229
00:13:31,812 --> 00:13:33,564
We weren't happy.
Now we are.
230
00:13:33,814 --> 00:13:35,399
You wrecked two marriages!
231
00:13:35,649 --> 00:13:38,652
First, one was mine, so that
doesn't count. Second“.
232
00:13:38,902 --> 00:13:41,071
...Stan's wife was fat,
with no sexual charisma.
233
00:13:41,322 --> 00:13:43,907
That marriage was doomed,
so it wasn't cheating.
234
00:13:44,241 --> 00:13:45,826
I don't think
that's how it works.
235
00:13:46,076 --> 00:13:49,079
But I think a married guy
is a perfect fit for you.
236
00:13:49,330 --> 00:13:51,665
Mark was able to lead
a whole other life
237
00:13:51,749 --> 00:13:53,584
without you
even noticing.
238
00:13:53,667 --> 00:13:55,836
You need a guy with
something to keep him busy.
239
00:13:56,003 --> 00:13:57,838
Not a wife!
(SIGHS)
240
00:13:57,921 --> 00:14:00,632
I don't do this. I'm
too old for this shit.
241
00:14:00,966 --> 00:14:04,762
I've been dating for decades!
I don't need this anymore!
242
00:14:05,637 --> 00:14:07,973
Somebody's being negative.
I'll go.
243
00:14:08,265 --> 00:14:11,101
I'll tell you what my mother
told me-- words to live by.
244
00:14:11,977 --> 00:14:15,147
Selfish people
live longer
245
00:14:15,939 --> 00:14:16,940
I'm just saying.
246
00:14:20,235 --> 00:14:21,612
(INTERCOM BEEPS)
247
00:14:21,820 --> 00:14:25,949
WOMAN: Miss Whitten? There's someone
here to see you--Kate King.
248
00:14:37,169 --> 00:14:40,005
Hi. I'm Kate.
I met you on Friday.
249
00:14:40,339 --> 00:14:45,010
Yeah, I remember. Sorry about your urn.
Why are you here?
250
00:14:45,803 --> 00:14:48,347
Um, I found your number
in my husband's phone.
251
00:14:48,639 --> 00:14:49,807
So, um...
252
00:14:50,015 --> 00:14:52,226
Well, actually,
the phone bill,
253
00:14:52,351 --> 00:14:54,520
because I couldn't crack
the code on his password.
254
00:14:54,812 --> 00:14:58,482
Which is fitting, as obviously I don't
know anything going on in his life.
255
00:14:58,690 --> 00:15:01,193
But, anyhow, I'm here.
256
00:15:01,527 --> 00:15:03,529
I thought maybe
we could talk?
257
00:15:03,862 --> 00:15:06,031
No, we can't.
If you have any questions
258
00:15:06,156 --> 00:15:08,367
about your husband,
you should ask him.
259
00:15:09,034 --> 00:15:11,662
Oh, well, I would,
but I'm pretty sure...
260
00:15:12,037 --> 00:15:15,374
...he's lying to me and
sleeping with you. (CHUCKLES)
261
00:15:17,709 --> 00:15:18,877
So...
262
00:15:23,715 --> 00:15:25,384
Am I right? (GASPS)
263
00:15:25,467 --> 00:15:26,802
Oh!
264
00:15:26,885 --> 00:15:28,554
Am I right?
265
00:15:29,054 --> 00:15:30,681
You're sleeping
with my husband?
266
00:15:31,014 --> 00:15:32,891
I'm sorry.
I had no idea. I swear.
267
00:15:33,225 --> 00:15:34,560
You're sleeping
with my husband?!
268
00:15:34,726 --> 00:15:36,019
Could you keep it down?
269
00:15:36,145 --> 00:15:37,312
Oh!
270
00:15:37,396 --> 00:15:39,565
Oh, gosh. Okay.
271
00:15:40,065 --> 00:15:41,900
Oh, oh...
272
00:15:42,609 --> 00:15:43,610
Ooh!
273
00:15:43,777 --> 00:15:45,863
I did not
expect this at all.
274
00:15:46,113 --> 00:15:49,783
I thought I would come here and
you would tell me I was crazy.
275
00:15:50,117 --> 00:15:54,121
I did not think that
I would be right at all.
276
00:15:54,788 --> 00:15:56,290
I mean,
maybe a little,
277
00:15:56,373 --> 00:15:58,625
in that too-horrible-
to-be-true kind of way.
278
00:15:58,709 --> 00:16:00,544
The say-the-awful-
thing-so-that-
279
00:16:00,669 --> 00:16:02,463
the-awful-thing-
doesn't-happen thing.
280
00:16:02,546 --> 00:16:04,047
(BREATHING HEAVILY)
Ooh! Oh!
281
00:16:04,131 --> 00:16:05,632
Does this--
282
00:16:06,300 --> 00:16:09,136
Does this open?
The window? Anywhere?
283
00:16:09,803 --> 00:16:12,973
There's got to be a little
latch or something.
284
00:16:13,974 --> 00:16:15,142
Does this window open?
(CLEARS THROAT)
285
00:16:15,392 --> 00:16:16,643
No, and for good reason.
286
00:16:16,727 --> 00:16:19,897
If you're having a panic attack,
go outside and get some air.
287
00:16:20,147 --> 00:16:22,316
Let me just lay
down for a minute.
288
00:16:22,649 --> 00:16:24,193
You sure
the window doesn't open?
289
00:16:24,318 --> 00:16:25,819
No. You'll be fine.
290
00:16:26,069 --> 00:16:29,490
This window. Just open it a little.
Crack it. Just crack it.
291
00:16:29,823 --> 00:16:31,492
If you don't mind...
292
00:16:31,825 --> 00:16:35,329
We're out of air. It's hot in here.
Just crack the window.
293
00:16:35,662 --> 00:16:38,916
Okay, I'll tell you anything
you want if you just leave.
294
00:16:39,249 --> 00:16:40,501
Anything?
295
00:16:41,168 --> 00:16:42,169
Anything.
296
00:16:42,252 --> 00:16:43,712
(BREATHING HEAVILY) Okay.
297
00:16:43,837 --> 00:16:45,172
Help me up.
298
00:16:45,714 --> 00:16:47,633
(INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS)
(MUSIC PLAYING)
299
00:16:56,350 --> 00:16:59,269
How long have you and my husband
been seeing each other?
300
00:16:59,520 --> 00:17:01,355
I don't know--
a couple months.
301
00:17:02,314 --> 00:17:04,983
Did you just start
sleeping together?
302
00:17:05,317 --> 00:17:09,321
We were going to hold off for prom,
but we just got carried away.
303
00:17:09,780 --> 00:17:11,782
We're adults. We had sex.
304
00:17:11,990 --> 00:17:13,325
The details don't matter.
305
00:17:13,617 --> 00:17:15,953
The details do matter,
because“.
306
00:17:16,161 --> 00:17:18,372
...there's a difference
between having sex
307
00:17:18,497 --> 00:17:20,666
one time and
having sex ten times.
308
00:17:21,291 --> 00:17:24,294
Oh, my God! Did you do
it more than ten times?
309
00:17:24,628 --> 00:17:26,296
I think specifics
are a bad idea.
310
00:17:29,675 --> 00:17:32,844
Okay, fine.
Gun to my head...
311
00:17:33,303 --> 00:17:34,304
...fifty.
312
00:17:34,638 --> 00:17:36,473
Fifty times?!
313
00:17:37,307 --> 00:17:38,976
Fifty times?!
314
00:17:39,309 --> 00:17:41,979
You had sex with my
husband fifty times?!
315
00:17:42,312 --> 00:17:47,150
Don't you have a job?! Or hobbies?!
What is wrong with you?!
316
00:17:48,193 --> 00:17:51,029
Does this mean he's not
training for the marathon?
317
00:17:51,196 --> 00:17:52,531
Yeah... No.
318
00:17:52,864 --> 00:17:56,201
This is not okay.
lam part of Team King.
319
00:17:56,493 --> 00:18:00,706
I quit my job so we could focus on his job.
I put off having kids...
320
00:18:00,998 --> 00:18:02,499
...because he wasn't ready.
321
00:18:02,708 --> 00:18:07,170
I went to China! Do you
know how far away China is?
322
00:18:07,504 --> 00:18:08,839
And it's not all
Hong Kong, either.
323
00:18:08,964 --> 00:18:10,340
Lots of pollution.
324
00:18:10,674 --> 00:18:12,843
What do I do?
Now I'm Barb Melman?
325
00:18:13,051 --> 00:18:15,846
Barb Melman got divorced
and now she has...
326
00:18:16,054 --> 00:18:19,057
...cheek implants and lives
in a condo in Norwalk...
327
00:18:19,349 --> 00:18:23,395
...and has to go on dates. lam
not equipped to go on dates.
328
00:18:23,729 --> 00:18:25,689
The last time I was
single, I was 24
329
00:18:25,856 --> 00:18:27,858
and the dating
pool was everyone!
330
00:18:28,191 --> 00:18:30,360
Now it's like
a shallow puddle...
331
00:18:30,694 --> 00:18:34,031
...of age-appropriate
men who are old...
332
00:18:34,239 --> 00:18:36,867
...and gross and
I don't want to do that!
333
00:18:37,034 --> 00:18:39,328
I know that you think
it's that bad,
334
00:18:39,453 --> 00:18:41,705
but honestly,
it's a lot worse.
335
00:18:41,913 --> 00:18:46,418
You know why? Even if you meet
a nice guy-- and by "nice"...
336
00:18:46,752 --> 00:18:48,712
...I mean that he's not
an obvious sociopath--
337
00:18:48,795 --> 00:18:51,423
you can't get
excited about it...
338
00:18:51,882 --> 00:18:53,634
...because it's just
a matter of time before
339
00:18:53,717 --> 00:18:56,887
someone gets bored and unhappy
and is saying it's over.
340
00:18:57,220 --> 00:18:59,890
And that's a happy ending.
A shitty ending...
341
00:19:00,140 --> 00:19:02,351
...is that there's
lying and cheating
342
00:19:02,476 --> 00:19:04,645
and you ambush
Prince Charming's wife.
343
00:19:04,978 --> 00:19:06,396
You're saying
I should stay with him.
344
00:19:06,647 --> 00:19:10,484
I'm saying everything fails eventually
and monogamy is not natural.
345
00:19:11,151 --> 00:19:13,987
If you can live with that, like
the French, then stay put.
346
00:19:14,237 --> 00:19:16,907
But if you can't, I suggest you
get a game plan and leave.
347
00:19:17,157 --> 00:19:21,828
But what about the people who try to
work it out? Maybe that's an option.
348
00:19:22,162 --> 00:19:23,997
Cheaters don't change.
349
00:19:24,247 --> 00:19:27,250
And if you work it out, he's
just going to do it again.
350
00:19:27,501 --> 00:19:29,503
You'll end up back
where you started,
351
00:19:29,628 --> 00:19:31,630
wishing you'd left
the first time around.
352
00:19:31,963 --> 00:19:34,341
But that's just me.
He's your husband.
353
00:19:34,758 --> 00:19:36,468
What does your gut tell you?
(BURPS)
354
00:19:36,677 --> 00:19:37,844
Jesus Christ!
355
00:19:38,095 --> 00:19:39,596
It was just a burp.
356
00:19:42,224 --> 00:19:43,892
(RETCHING)
357
00:19:44,017 --> 00:19:46,019
Can I get some napkins?
358
00:19:46,186 --> 00:19:47,521
That was throw-up.
359
00:19:49,773 --> 00:19:51,066
(LAUGHING) Ah!
360
00:19:51,149 --> 00:19:52,150
Oh, my God!
361
00:19:52,984 --> 00:19:57,155
Okay, great, come on. Let's get in the car.
Come on, come on.
362
00:19:57,322 --> 00:19:58,699
(LAUGHING)
363
00:20:01,660 --> 00:20:02,994
Okay, Okay-
364
00:20:03,286 --> 00:20:04,955
Bye! See you later!
365
00:20:05,330 --> 00:20:07,124
Bye, see you later!
366
00:20:07,457 --> 00:20:08,834
Bye, I'm going.
367
00:20:09,167 --> 00:20:10,669
This is a bag
full of vomit.
368
00:20:10,961 --> 00:20:12,671
It's not my first.
369
00:20:13,338 --> 00:20:15,132
Come on,
let's get you in the car.
370
00:20:15,298 --> 00:20:16,633
Get into the--
371
00:20:16,800 --> 00:20:17,968
That's enough.
372
00:20:18,176 --> 00:20:20,846
No, don't go just yet.
Just one kiss.
373
00:20:21,179 --> 00:20:24,516
One kiss and good-bye.
Okay, that was it.
374
00:20:24,808 --> 00:20:26,476
Okay, let's go.
(CAR ENGINE STARTS)
375
00:20:26,685 --> 00:20:29,354
Let's get into the car.
Be very careful.
376
00:20:29,688 --> 00:20:30,689
I don't want to go.
377
00:20:30,981 --> 00:20:33,358
Put your foot down.
Please go.
378
00:20:35,694 --> 00:20:39,030
Let me just-- Wait.
How are you doing that?
379
00:20:39,489 --> 00:20:41,116
(GROANING)
380
00:20:42,701 --> 00:20:45,704
Okay, let's go this way.
All right.
381
00:20:46,371 --> 00:20:48,540
Get over.
It's a step down.
382
00:20:48,874 --> 00:20:52,043
Step down. Step down.
Okay, there you go.
383
00:20:52,377 --> 00:20:53,670
There you go.
384
00:20:56,047 --> 00:20:57,716
FERNANDO: It's really nice,
what you're doing for her.
385
00:20:58,008 --> 00:21:00,719
Yeah, that's me--
Mistress of the Year.
386
00:21:01,052 --> 00:21:03,180
Okay, Fernando,
90,90,90!
387
00:21:03,889 --> 00:21:06,224
Best night ever! I!
388
00:21:06,391 --> 00:21:07,392
Ever!!!
389
00:21:07,726 --> 00:21:09,060
Bye!
390
00:21:09,770 --> 00:21:11,438
(WHOOPING)
391
00:21:11,521 --> 00:21:13,899
(LAUGHING) Yes!
392
00:21:14,191 --> 00:21:15,525
Holy shit.
393
00:21:15,734 --> 00:21:16,735
Call me!
394
00:21:17,027 --> 00:21:18,153
That is so weird.
395
00:21:56,608 --> 00:21:58,276
WOMAN 1:
My husband likes this pasta.
396
00:21:58,610 --> 00:22:00,278
WOMAN 2: Milk?
My husband prefers goat.
397
00:22:00,612 --> 00:22:02,948
WOMAN 3: My husband
likes a meaty sauce.
398
00:22:03,532 --> 00:22:04,908
(INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS)
399
00:22:09,955 --> 00:22:12,749
(WOMEN SPEAKING FRENCH)
400
00:22:24,094 --> 00:22:26,429
--doing the Benson
depo on Tuesday...
401
00:22:26,680 --> 00:22:29,850
...but if we want it on video, I
need a different court reporter.
402
00:22:31,017 --> 00:22:33,186
(WHISPERING)
Kate King is at security.
403
00:22:33,520 --> 00:22:34,771
What?
404
00:22:35,438 --> 00:22:36,773
Kate King.
405
00:22:41,528 --> 00:22:42,612
Excuse me.
406
00:22:44,447 --> 00:22:45,949
What's up, Leonard?
407
00:22:46,199 --> 00:22:47,284
Hey, Miss Whitten.
408
00:22:47,534 --> 00:22:49,494
Ray Charles over here
tried to pass herself off
409
00:22:49,619 --> 00:22:51,621
as a blind woman
to get upstairs.
410
00:22:51,872 --> 00:22:53,540
Oh, no, I didn't!
411
00:22:53,790 --> 00:22:56,710
I'm wearing these glasses
because I look like shit.
412
00:22:56,793 --> 00:22:58,879
He saw the dog and drew
his own conclusions.
413
00:22:58,962 --> 00:23:00,547
That did not happen.
414
00:23:00,630 --> 00:23:03,466
And if I was Ray Charles, I
would actually be blind and...
415
00:23:03,717 --> 00:23:06,595
...need this dog, so thanks
for making no sense.
416
00:23:06,678 --> 00:23:07,679
What is it?
417
00:23:07,762 --> 00:23:11,391
I'm not French. I had a
little Edith Piaf moment...
418
00:23:11,683 --> 00:23:13,810
...but the idea
of worrying about
419
00:23:13,935 --> 00:23:16,021
white shirts and
thin turkey and all that...
420
00:23:16,354 --> 00:23:19,649
...while pretending not to
know about his whores...
421
00:23:19,858 --> 00:23:23,403
...is really throwing me
into an all-American rage.
422
00:23:23,737 --> 00:23:26,072
Not that you're a whore!
You're not a whore.
423
00:23:26,239 --> 00:23:28,742
Okay, turn around.
Turn around.
424
00:23:28,992 --> 00:23:30,327
You're not a whore.
Let's go outside.
425
00:23:31,828 --> 00:23:33,538
I'm assuming you came here
426
00:23:33,622 --> 00:23:35,081
because you think
we're friends
427
00:23:35,206 --> 00:23:36,666
and that I care
about your problems...
428
00:23:36,917 --> 00:23:38,501
...but guess what?
I don't.
429
00:23:38,752 --> 00:23:42,589
I don't care about you or Mark
or your marriage or your dog.
430
00:23:42,839 --> 00:23:45,133
If Edith Piaf rises
out of the grave and
431
00:23:45,258 --> 00:23:47,510
you have a threesome,
I don't flipping care!
432
00:23:47,761 --> 00:23:49,095
I was keeping you
in the loop.
433
00:23:49,346 --> 00:23:52,349
I want out of the loop!
Take me out.
434
00:23:52,933 --> 00:23:54,601
Okay?
Okay!
435
00:23:54,935 --> 00:23:56,019
Thank you!
436
00:23:59,856 --> 00:24:01,358
Come on, Thunder.
437
00:24:05,362 --> 00:24:06,863
(DOORBELL RINGING)
438
00:24:17,582 --> 00:24:18,917
Oh, my God.
439
00:24:19,918 --> 00:24:23,380
Sorry. It's me.
Don't be mad. I just--
440
00:24:23,713 --> 00:24:26,466
I just want to talk. I thought
we could have some dinner?
441
00:24:26,967 --> 00:24:28,301
How do you know
where I live?
442
00:24:29,886 --> 00:24:31,137
We followed you home.
443
00:24:31,388 --> 00:24:35,225
But I didn't want to show up
empty-handed, so I brought food.
444
00:24:35,558 --> 00:24:37,811
Some food is right here.
445
00:24:37,894 --> 00:24:39,104
(CHUCKLES)
446
00:24:39,437 --> 00:24:40,939
How'd you get
in the building?
447
00:24:41,272 --> 00:24:44,609
We waited for someone to leave
and then snuck in.
448
00:24:47,278 --> 00:24:48,405
Hi.
449
00:24:48,613 --> 00:24:52,283
What is your deal? Do you
not get how weird this is?
450
00:24:52,575 --> 00:24:56,621
I just thought maybe we could
talk, because I, um...
451
00:24:56,955 --> 00:24:58,289
Because“.
452
00:24:59,332 --> 00:25:01,668
Because my whole
world just blew up
453
00:25:01,751 --> 00:25:03,294
and I don't have a job!
(SOBBING)
454
00:25:03,628 --> 00:25:05,797
I have no money of my own!
455
00:25:06,089 --> 00:25:09,926
And I honestly do not know
what I'm going to do at all!
456
00:25:10,135 --> 00:25:11,928
I have no friends
to talk to because
457
00:25:12,053 --> 00:25:13,805
my friends are
Mark's friends...
458
00:25:14,097 --> 00:25:16,099
...and they'll blab!
You are literally
459
00:25:16,266 --> 00:25:18,268
the only person
in the world...
460
00:25:18,476 --> 00:25:20,520
...who knows what's
happening besides me!
461
00:25:20,645 --> 00:25:22,647
And if I keep
talking to myself...
462
00:25:22,981 --> 00:25:27,485
...about it, I'm going to go
crazy...for real. Like, really.
463
00:25:27,819 --> 00:25:30,155
I can't talk to you
until you stop crying.
464
00:25:31,823 --> 00:25:33,324
I want to. (SOBS)
465
00:25:36,327 --> 00:25:38,496
Let me just--
I'm sorry.
466
00:25:39,164 --> 00:25:40,498
I just am sad.
467
00:25:40,790 --> 00:25:43,001
Then cry on the inside,
like a winner.
468
00:25:44,294 --> 00:25:46,629
You can't care for yourself
unless you toughen up.
469
00:25:46,880 --> 00:25:49,883
As far as talking to someone
who won't blab,
470
00:25:49,966 --> 00:25:51,718
I can give you the names
of three different lawyers.
471
00:25:51,801 --> 00:25:53,136
Lawyers cost money.
472
00:25:53,386 --> 00:25:55,513
You have money. You have
half of what Mark has.
473
00:25:55,680 --> 00:25:57,057
Okay. Thank you.
474
00:25:57,307 --> 00:25:58,725
You're welcome.
Are we done?
475
00:25:58,975 --> 00:26:01,311
Done? That wasn't
even a conversation.
476
00:26:01,394 --> 00:26:03,980
You mostly just yelled
at me the whole time.
477
00:26:04,064 --> 00:26:05,315
(DOG WHIMPERING)
478
00:26:08,359 --> 00:26:09,360
Okay, look.
479
00:26:10,904 --> 00:26:12,655
If I let you in,
we are not braiding
480
00:26:12,822 --> 00:26:14,574
each other's hair
and drinking Cosmos.
481
00:26:15,408 --> 00:26:16,576
You have one hour.
Okay.
482
00:26:16,826 --> 00:26:18,912
And I get first dibs
on what's in the bag.
483
00:26:19,162 --> 00:26:20,497
Sure thing.
484
00:26:20,830 --> 00:26:23,750
Have a seat, but please keep
your dog off of my furniture.
485
00:26:33,927 --> 00:26:35,261
(WHISPERS) Thunder...
486
00:26:36,096 --> 00:26:37,430
...get down.
487
00:26:37,764 --> 00:26:40,100
Get down. Get down.
488
00:26:40,600 --> 00:26:42,477
Down!
(SIGHS)
489
00:26:43,770 --> 00:26:45,939
Okay. That's great.
490
00:26:46,773 --> 00:26:48,441
He's juSt a PUPPY-
491
00:26:52,862 --> 00:26:54,280
Have a seat.
492
00:26:55,115 --> 00:26:58,201
I don't want to sit someplace
where you and Mark had sex.
493
00:26:58,868 --> 00:27:00,286
(CLEARS TH THROAT)
494
00:27:00,954 --> 00:27:02,455
ls the ottoman okay?
495
00:27:02,789 --> 00:27:04,207
Mmm...
496
00:27:05,542 --> 00:27:07,043
What about the chair?
497
00:27:13,633 --> 00:27:14,801
If I'm being honest...
498
00:27:15,051 --> 00:27:17,220
Are you serious?
It's a window!
499
00:27:17,470 --> 00:27:19,639
People can see in here!
500
00:27:19,973 --> 00:27:22,642
You just have to pick a spot
and be okay with it.
501
00:27:22,892 --> 00:27:25,061
Just have a seat.
(SIGHS)
502
00:27:30,733 --> 00:27:32,193
(CELL PHONE BUZZING)
503
00:27:35,989 --> 00:27:37,240
ls Mark calling?
504
00:27:40,827 --> 00:27:41,828
Yes, it is.
505
00:27:42,078 --> 00:27:44,247
Mark's in Miami.
Why is he calling you?
506
00:27:44,497 --> 00:27:46,166
I didn't know
he was in Miami.
507
00:27:46,416 --> 00:27:47,792
Why is he
calling you at all?
508
00:27:47,917 --> 00:27:49,335
I don't know that, either.
509
00:27:49,586 --> 00:27:52,088
I don't call a boyfriend back
after I find out he has a wife.
510
00:27:52,338 --> 00:27:53,756
So you haven't
called him, full silent
511
00:27:53,882 --> 00:27:55,300
treatment and
he's still calling?
512
00:27:55,592 --> 00:27:57,260
I'm pretty sure that's
why he's still calling.
513
00:27:57,427 --> 00:28:00,138
What if he's calling to say he loves
you and wants to be with you?
514
00:28:00,221 --> 00:28:01,222
I don't care.
515
00:28:01,514 --> 00:28:03,600
Well, what if he's
in love with you?
516
00:28:03,766 --> 00:28:05,852
I mean, has he ever
said he loves you?
517
00:28:06,102 --> 00:28:08,479
Has he talked to you
like that, or has he...?
518
00:28:08,605 --> 00:28:11,024
I mean, do you think
that he still loves me?
519
00:28:13,693 --> 00:28:16,529
If we're going to do this,
I need a drink.
520
00:28:19,032 --> 00:28:20,366
I get it.
Get what?
521
00:28:20,700 --> 00:28:25,205
You have the perfect place, and
you are the perfect girl...
522
00:28:25,538 --> 00:28:29,042
...and you could probably take off
all your clothes right now...
523
00:28:29,292 --> 00:28:32,462
...and have no flab
and not need a wax...
524
00:28:32,712 --> 00:28:35,381
...or anything and
just be ready to go.
525
00:28:35,715 --> 00:28:39,052
My situation's pretty situated
at all times, it's true.
526
00:28:39,385 --> 00:28:41,387
And see, lam not situated.
527
00:28:41,638 --> 00:28:45,058
I can't even remember
to shave my legs.
528
00:28:45,391 --> 00:28:48,728
I need like at least a week
of prep, minimum.
529
00:28:49,062 --> 00:28:51,314
Doesn't Mark see you
naked all the time?
530
00:28:52,232 --> 00:28:53,900
No.
He doesn't?
531
00:28:54,150 --> 00:28:56,319
No. It's...
532
00:28:56,903 --> 00:28:58,571
Nooooo.
533
00:28:59,072 --> 00:29:01,908
What's it like? Is it
like a '70s situation?
534
00:29:02,242 --> 00:29:03,743
It's like...
535
00:29:04,244 --> 00:29:07,497
...now I'm totally serious,
like...not...
536
00:29:10,833 --> 00:29:12,502
No man likes that.
537
00:29:13,086 --> 00:29:15,588
It's like a...
just not--
538
00:29:16,047 --> 00:29:18,007
I'm not saying
you have to be bald
539
00:29:18,174 --> 00:29:20,093
or anything.
Just like a fig leaf.
540
00:29:20,551 --> 00:29:21,886
That's all they want.
541
00:29:22,178 --> 00:29:23,846
They just need to have...
542
00:29:24,097 --> 00:29:27,517
...a pretty little
patch of happiness.
543
00:29:28,559 --> 00:29:30,895
You know,
lam like...
544
00:29:32,230 --> 00:29:33,898
...Martha Stewart...
545
00:29:34,565 --> 00:29:37,235
...but with big underpants.
546
00:29:37,694 --> 00:29:40,071
Let me tell you something
about Martha Stewart.
547
00:29:40,154 --> 00:29:42,699
She handled prison
like a boss!
548
00:29:42,907 --> 00:29:45,243
Thank you. Right?
549
00:29:46,244 --> 00:29:49,914
I still think I'm not ready to
compete with women like you.
550
00:29:50,206 --> 00:29:52,333
Though technically,
I have been competing
551
00:29:52,417 --> 00:29:54,419
with women like you
and just didn't know it.
552
00:29:54,711 --> 00:29:57,046
We're not in competition.
We got played
553
00:29:57,213 --> 00:29:59,590
by the same guy.
I call it a tie.
554
00:30:00,758 --> 00:30:02,093
Tequila or vodka?
555
00:30:02,343 --> 00:30:03,344
(LAUGHING)
556
00:30:03,428 --> 00:30:05,763
KATE: I can't believe
I'm in the mistress's closet.
557
00:30:06,055 --> 00:30:10,768
lam not a mistress. A mistress
knows she's dating a married man.
558
00:30:11,060 --> 00:30:14,272
I didn't know, so I'm not a mistress.
Can you say that, please?
559
00:30:14,564 --> 00:30:17,066
Seriously, can you please
say I'm not a mistress?
560
00:30:17,317 --> 00:30:18,985
Oh. You're not a mistress.
Thank you.
561
00:30:19,319 --> 00:30:20,653
Sorry.
(BOTH LAUGH)
562
00:30:21,154 --> 00:30:24,324
Try these on. These
ones are very special.
563
00:30:24,657 --> 00:30:27,327
I don't think we have the
same size foot. (GASPS)
564
00:30:28,494 --> 00:30:30,830
This looks like
a box of bungee cords.
565
00:30:31,080 --> 00:30:33,166
What it does is
hold your tits up.
566
00:30:33,666 --> 00:30:35,001
That's so awesome.
567
00:30:35,501 --> 00:30:36,711
This is like
a logic puzzle.
568
00:30:36,836 --> 00:30:38,004
It would look
so hot on you.
569
00:30:38,254 --> 00:30:40,089
I don't know why
men find these sexy.
570
00:30:40,631 --> 00:30:42,133
Mouse hammock.
571
00:30:42,216 --> 00:30:44,427
(LAUGHING)
572
00:31:22,673 --> 00:31:23,674
(GRUNTS)
573
00:31:24,300 --> 00:31:27,887
Wake up. You're making
out with your dog.
574
00:31:29,847 --> 00:31:30,848
Ugh.
575
00:31:31,557 --> 00:31:33,059
What is he doing?
576
00:31:33,810 --> 00:31:35,061
KATE: Oh, no.
577
00:31:35,311 --> 00:31:37,146
No,no,no!
578
00:31:38,815 --> 00:31:40,316
(BOTH GROAN)
579
00:31:41,067 --> 00:31:42,693
I'm sorry.
Ugh!
580
00:31:43,736 --> 00:31:45,071
Damn it!
581
00:31:46,072 --> 00:31:47,824
You want me to get it?
582
00:31:48,908 --> 00:31:51,577
I'm really sorry.
I thought I had him that time.
583
00:31:51,828 --> 00:31:52,995
Send me the cleaning bill.
584
00:31:53,121 --> 00:31:54,247
Believe it
585
00:31:55,623 --> 00:31:57,041
(WHISTLES)
586
00:31:57,250 --> 00:31:58,918
You'll send me
the lawyers' names?
587
00:31:59,168 --> 00:32:01,003
You still want those?
Yeah.
588
00:32:01,254 --> 00:32:03,923
Listen, Mark's shady. He
finds out you have a lawyer,
589
00:32:04,006 --> 00:32:06,259
you become the enemy.
If he thinks...
590
00:32:06,509 --> 00:32:09,929
...you're clueless, you have an edge.
Get your ducks in a row.
591
00:32:10,179 --> 00:32:12,432
Thank you for everything.
I really appreciate it.
592
00:32:12,682 --> 00:32:14,016
Yeah. That's fine.
593
00:32:15,852 --> 00:32:17,270
Thank you so much.
594
00:32:17,395 --> 00:32:18,771
No problem.
You're welcome.
595
00:32:19,939 --> 00:32:20,940
Bye.
596
00:32:31,284 --> 00:32:32,952
Holy shit.
597
00:32:34,328 --> 00:32:36,164
(KATE SCREAMING)
598
00:32:38,416 --> 00:32:39,959
(CELL PHONE RINGING)
599
00:32:47,467 --> 00:32:48,801
Shit.
600
00:32:52,305 --> 00:32:55,892
Oh, I'm sorry. I thought
you'd have your phone off.
601
00:32:56,142 --> 00:32:57,643
Then why even call?
602
00:32:57,894 --> 00:32:59,395
Why did you have
your phone on?
603
00:32:59,645 --> 00:33:00,980
What do you need, Kate?
604
00:33:01,230 --> 00:33:02,815
Well, it's not
a big deal, but...
605
00:33:03,065 --> 00:33:06,986
...you know how sometimes
you get like a...
606
00:33:07,236 --> 00:33:09,071
...just a hint of
a zit and you...
607
00:33:09,322 --> 00:33:11,157
...pick at it
a little bit, and...
608
00:33:11,491 --> 00:33:13,493
...you keep picking at it...
609
00:33:13,826 --> 00:33:15,828
...until it becomes this...
610
00:33:16,162 --> 00:33:20,333
...soul-sucking, life-ruining
face crater that you...
611
00:33:20,583 --> 00:33:22,418
...absolutely cannot hide?
612
00:33:22,668 --> 00:33:24,629
You're calling
because you got a zit?
613
00:33:26,339 --> 00:33:27,673
Not exactly.
614
00:33:28,841 --> 00:33:30,676
What the hell did you do?
615
00:33:31,010 --> 00:33:32,178
It was an accident.
616
00:33:32,428 --> 00:33:34,096
An accident?
I know.
617
00:33:34,347 --> 00:33:35,431
Were you on PCP?
618
00:33:35,932 --> 00:33:37,600
KATE".
Okay, here's what happened.
619
00:33:37,850 --> 00:33:40,686
I started digging around.
Everything was locked.
620
00:33:40,937 --> 00:33:43,940
And I started thinking,
maybe he is shady.
621
00:33:44,190 --> 00:33:46,359
And then I started
thinking that this
622
00:33:46,484 --> 00:33:48,694
whole room is filled
with lies and secrets.
623
00:33:48,945 --> 00:33:51,197
It was like this
red mist came over me.
624
00:33:51,864 --> 00:33:53,032
So...
625
00:33:53,533 --> 00:33:56,285
You know how I told you to
get your ducks in a row?
626
00:33:56,953 --> 00:33:58,704
Well, this isn't
putting your ducks in a row.
627
00:33:58,788 --> 00:34:00,373
This is putting your ducks
in a wood chipper!
628
00:34:00,456 --> 00:34:01,958
(DOORBELL RINGING)
Hold on.
629
00:34:02,208 --> 00:34:04,043
Shit, he's early.
Who?
630
00:34:04,293 --> 00:34:05,378
My brother, Phil.
631
00:34:05,628 --> 00:34:07,088
Don't mention
the whole mistress thing.
632
00:34:07,213 --> 00:34:08,631
But it's such
an icebreaker.
633
00:34:08,923 --> 00:34:09,924
(CLEARS TH THROAT)
634
00:34:12,218 --> 00:34:13,386
Who's this?
635
00:34:14,053 --> 00:34:16,222
I'm Carmela,
Kate's decorator.
636
00:34:16,305 --> 00:34:17,306
Oh.
637
00:34:17,390 --> 00:34:18,975
When did you fire Joel?
638
00:34:19,225 --> 00:34:21,227
I didn't.
No, he's, um...
639
00:34:21,561 --> 00:34:25,064
She's doing all of the stuff,
the feng shui...in the house.
640
00:34:25,314 --> 00:34:27,567
We met in Hong Kong.
I told you.
641
00:34:27,817 --> 00:34:30,152
We bonded over dim sum
and spatial reasoning.
642
00:34:30,403 --> 00:34:32,405
Two of my favorite things.
(BOTH LAUGH)
643
00:34:32,738 --> 00:34:36,742
That's so smart and funny!
That's really witty.
644
00:34:37,410 --> 00:34:38,619
So, this is
my brother.
645
00:34:38,744 --> 00:34:39,912
Yeah, you said that.
646
00:34:40,162 --> 00:34:42,164
He's a contractor.
Oh, a contractor.
647
00:34:42,415 --> 00:34:43,749
He'll look at
the office while you go.
648
00:34:44,000 --> 00:34:45,668
Unless you want to stay.
649
00:34:45,918 --> 00:34:49,922
I would love to, but it's
kind of a tricky project...
650
00:34:50,172 --> 00:34:52,216
...and I don't want
to complicate things.
651
00:34:52,341 --> 00:34:54,427
But it was really
nice meeting you.
652
00:34:54,760 --> 00:34:57,430
You, too.
I hope I see you again soon.
653
00:34:57,763 --> 00:34:59,265
Carmela? Really?
654
00:34:59,515 --> 00:35:01,684
Did you and Tony
enjoy Hong Kong?
655
00:35:01,767 --> 00:35:03,352
Or did Big Pussy and Meadow
miss you too much?
656
00:35:03,436 --> 00:35:06,272
You will thank me for using a fake name.
You want Phil...
657
00:35:06,522 --> 00:35:09,191
...mentioning your new
friend Carly to Mark?
658
00:35:09,442 --> 00:35:11,444
No. So you're welcome.
By the way,
659
00:35:11,569 --> 00:35:13,613
what is up with
your hot brother?
660
00:35:13,863 --> 00:35:17,450
No! No, you can't have my
husband and my brother!
661
00:35:17,783 --> 00:35:20,786
No! That's being very greedy.
662
00:35:21,120 --> 00:35:22,955
I think you're being greedy. Me?
663
00:35:23,205 --> 00:35:24,874
He's your brother.
What would you do with him?
664
00:35:25,124 --> 00:35:28,210
So is everybody like hot-hot
Phil in your family,
665
00:35:28,294 --> 00:35:29,795
or are most of them
like you?
666
00:35:29,879 --> 00:35:31,213
I'm cute-cute Kate.
667
00:35:31,464 --> 00:35:33,466
What about your father?
Leave Dad out of this!
668
00:35:33,716 --> 00:35:34,717
I bet he's hot.
669
00:35:34,967 --> 00:35:37,303
You and your vagina
need to just--
670
00:35:51,609 --> 00:35:52,777
Kate?
671
00:36:02,286 --> 00:36:03,621
Surprise!
672
00:36:04,121 --> 00:36:07,249
I started redecorating.
What do you think?
673
00:36:07,416 --> 00:36:09,418
What happened to
just painting it red?
674
00:36:09,585 --> 00:36:11,087
Oh, red is so cliché.
675
00:36:11,170 --> 00:36:14,423
I would expect that from other guys
in their offices, but not you.
676
00:36:14,632 --> 00:36:19,470
You deserve something different,
something better than that.
677
00:36:19,595 --> 00:36:21,472
Oh.
It's good, right?
678
00:36:22,431 --> 00:36:24,141
I think it's great.
You do?
679
00:36:24,975 --> 00:36:26,811
I love it.
Really?
680
00:36:27,103 --> 00:36:30,272
Because you know how I get carried
away with all the colors--
681
00:36:34,944 --> 00:36:36,320
I missed you.
682
00:36:38,823 --> 00:36:40,491
How was Miami?
683
00:36:40,783 --> 00:36:42,785
Miami was amazing.
684
00:36:42,993 --> 00:36:45,496
The guys loved your
gift card swap idea.
685
00:36:45,788 --> 00:36:46,831
SwipeSwitch?
686
00:36:47,123 --> 00:36:48,290
And guess what?
What?
687
00:36:48,499 --> 00:36:49,500
Guess.
688
00:36:49,792 --> 00:36:51,335
What? What?
689
00:36:51,669 --> 00:36:55,464
They're going to put in
half a million as seed money.
690
00:36:55,673 --> 00:36:57,341
Really?!
That's right!
691
00:36:57,633 --> 00:36:59,969
(SHRIEKS)
We did it, we did it!
692
00:37:00,511 --> 00:37:02,179
Oh! Team King!
693
00:37:03,639 --> 00:37:05,683
I'll tell you all
about it at dinner.
694
00:37:05,850 --> 00:37:06,976
With me?
695
00:37:07,184 --> 00:37:09,854
Yes. We're celebrating.
Just let me clean up.
696
00:37:13,983 --> 00:37:15,693
(CELL PHONE RINGING)
697
00:37:19,321 --> 00:37:20,823
How's it going?
Not good.
698
00:37:21,031 --> 00:37:22,032
What's wrong?
699
00:37:22,158 --> 00:37:23,200
We have a situation.
700
00:37:23,492 --> 00:37:25,286
If you killed him,
don't tell me.
701
00:37:25,411 --> 00:37:27,204
I can't defend you
if I know you did it.
702
00:37:27,538 --> 00:37:29,039
No, I didn't kill him.
703
00:37:29,540 --> 00:37:32,042
It's something
that rhymes with...
704
00:37:32,543 --> 00:37:33,878
...schlintercourse.
705
00:37:34,170 --> 00:37:36,172
What?!
You had sex with him?
706
00:37:36,380 --> 00:37:39,216
No! Of course not.
It's barely dark outside.
707
00:37:39,508 --> 00:37:42,845
He's just on a high from
the business trip and...
708
00:37:45,055 --> 00:37:47,433
...he's got that look
in his eyes, that...
709
00:37:47,516 --> 00:37:48,517
(GRUNTS)
710
00:37:49,393 --> 00:37:50,728
...you know, that--
711
00:37:51,020 --> 00:37:54,023
I just don't know
if I can hold out.
712
00:37:54,231 --> 00:37:55,566
What is going on?
713
00:37:55,858 --> 00:37:58,694
I don't know!
There's been wine, and...
714
00:37:58,903 --> 00:38:00,863
...hand-holding during dinner.
715
00:38:00,988 --> 00:38:02,907
It just felt so good
to be touched, you know?
716
00:38:03,240 --> 00:38:06,243
Yeah, I do, because
he used to touch me, too.
717
00:38:06,368 --> 00:38:08,204
Ugh! Why do you say that?
718
00:38:08,412 --> 00:38:10,080
A lot. I don't
want to hear that.
719
00:38:10,372 --> 00:38:11,415
Then why call me?
For permission?
720
00:38:11,540 --> 00:38:12,583
No!
721
00:38:12,750 --> 00:38:14,877
If you want to have sex with
your husband,do it
722
00:38:15,044 --> 00:38:17,379
I'm wondering, what if I
keep my clothes on...
723
00:38:17,713 --> 00:38:19,215
...while we're having sex?
Really?
724
00:38:19,423 --> 00:38:24,386
What if the top part of me hated
him, while the bottom part of me...
725
00:38:24,595 --> 00:38:26,055
...did all the dirty work?
726
00:38:26,222 --> 00:38:27,473
What if he just
put it in halfway...
727
00:38:27,556 --> 00:38:30,434
...and then I took a really hot
bath after and really cleaned up?
728
00:38:30,935 --> 00:38:32,061
You're making a mistake.
729
00:38:32,186 --> 00:38:33,270
I'm trying not to.
730
00:38:33,562 --> 00:38:34,897
Not really.
lam!
731
00:38:35,105 --> 00:38:38,609
If you're going to cave every
time he pays attention to you...
732
00:38:38,901 --> 00:38:40,110
...leave me out of it.
733
00:38:40,277 --> 00:38:42,321
You can waste your own time,
but I'm done.
734
00:38:42,404 --> 00:38:43,948
Fine! Be done.
735
00:38:44,240 --> 00:38:45,574
I am done.
I'm done.
736
00:38:45,741 --> 00:38:47,076
This is me being done.
Fine.
737
00:38:47,243 --> 00:38:48,244
Good-bye.
738
00:38:48,410 --> 00:38:49,411
Forget I called.
739
00:38:49,620 --> 00:38:50,830
Good-bye.
740
00:38:52,581 --> 00:38:53,916
(EXHALES SHARPLY)
741
00:38:56,377 --> 00:38:57,753
(SIGHS)
742
00:38:59,463 --> 00:39:00,464
Kate...
743
00:39:01,465 --> 00:39:03,467
...you hold it together.
744
00:39:03,801 --> 00:39:05,970
He is awful.
745
00:39:07,096 --> 00:39:08,597
(LAUGHING)
746
00:39:19,108 --> 00:39:20,359
Oh, my God.
747
00:39:20,442 --> 00:39:21,443
(BOTH MOANING)
748
00:39:21,652 --> 00:39:23,320
I've missed you.
749
00:39:26,365 --> 00:39:28,033
You taste good.
750
00:39:28,284 --> 00:39:29,618
Oh, my God.
751
00:39:29,952 --> 00:39:31,787
And you smell so good.
752
00:39:36,125 --> 00:39:38,961
Okay, hold on one second.
Just one second.
753
00:39:39,628 --> 00:39:41,755
(BREATHING HEAVILY)
754
00:39:44,800 --> 00:39:46,468
I'll be right back.
755
00:39:47,636 --> 00:39:49,138
Don't move.
756
00:39:51,640 --> 00:39:52,641
(GROANS)
757
00:40:09,366 --> 00:40:10,910
(CELL PHONE BUZZING)
758
00:40:21,837 --> 00:40:23,005
Hey, baby.
759
00:40:23,172 --> 00:40:24,715
WOMAN: Hi.
What are you doing?
760
00:40:25,007 --> 00:40:26,383
Oh, I'm still working.
761
00:40:26,550 --> 00:40:30,554
WOMAN: Well, I'm not working.
And I am so freaking hot.
762
00:40:32,389 --> 00:40:33,390
Um...
763
00:40:44,068 --> 00:40:47,404
MARK: I wish.
What are you doing?
764
00:40:48,864 --> 00:40:51,533
Oh, baby, send me a
picture, will you?
765
00:40:52,201 --> 00:40:53,661
Send me a few pictures.
766
00:40:53,786 --> 00:40:55,245
I'll send tons.
767
00:40:56,413 --> 00:40:59,541
We'll have the whole weekend in
the Hamptons to work that out.
768
00:40:59,750 --> 00:41:01,210
I miss you.
769
00:41:01,335 --> 00:41:02,753
Oh, I miss you, too.
770
00:41:03,420 --> 00:41:04,922
I miss you.
771
00:41:05,255 --> 00:41:06,715
I miss you.
772
00:41:10,886 --> 00:41:14,056
L I got to go.
I got to go, baby
773
00:41:22,314 --> 00:41:25,567
Bill, I told you,
don't call me at night!
774
00:41:25,901 --> 00:41:27,569
I'll call you tomorrow.
775
00:41:28,904 --> 00:41:30,572
I'm sorry, honey.
776
00:41:30,823 --> 00:41:33,993
It's okay. The wine hit me wrong--
I have a splitting headache.
777
00:41:34,243 --> 00:41:35,577
Really?
778
00:41:36,412 --> 00:41:39,248
Maybe I can make
it go away, huh?
779
00:41:39,498 --> 00:41:41,500
Sorry, honey,
not tonight.
780
00:42:05,524 --> 00:42:06,859
KATE".
"Sorry for the tough love."
781
00:42:07,109 --> 00:42:10,279
"Do what you need to do. I support you"?
Yeah, right.
782
00:42:10,612 --> 00:42:11,613
Bitch.
783
00:42:11,864 --> 00:42:13,532
You Okay?
Yep.
784
00:42:13,782 --> 00:42:15,951
You sure? You're
talking to your phone.
785
00:42:16,201 --> 00:42:17,536
I'm fine.
786
00:42:18,787 --> 00:42:20,122
So, how's Carmela?
787
00:42:20,456 --> 00:42:22,124
Bad!
How come?
788
00:42:23,292 --> 00:42:27,212
Because I said so. Why, do you like her?
Because she is fired!
789
00:42:27,463 --> 00:42:29,298
What's going on with you?
790
00:42:29,548 --> 00:42:31,341
I'll take a stab
and say it's because
791
00:42:31,467 --> 00:42:33,302
you realized
feng shui is bullshit.
792
00:42:34,803 --> 00:42:36,513
You shouldn't pay for that.
793
00:42:37,306 --> 00:42:39,641
Okay, you know what?
Feng shui rules.
794
00:42:39,975 --> 00:42:42,144
There are so many
people in the world
795
00:42:42,311 --> 00:42:44,480
and in China who
love feng shui. (SOBS)
796
00:42:44,730 --> 00:42:47,149
Feng shui is not
what you think it is!
797
00:42:47,274 --> 00:42:49,651
And I hate that you
keep saying it's dumb!
798
00:42:49,985 --> 00:42:50,986
I didn't mean it.
799
00:42:51,236 --> 00:42:53,572
Feng shui is good
'cause it's important...
800
00:42:53,822 --> 00:42:55,449
...to know where
to place things
801
00:42:55,574 --> 00:42:57,159
in order to make
yourself feel better.
802
00:42:58,035 --> 00:42:59,036
(sesame)
803
00:42:59,495 --> 00:43:01,538
Katie. Sweetheart?
804
00:43:03,165 --> 00:43:04,333
Katie?
805
00:43:04,666 --> 00:43:05,834
What are you doing?
806
00:43:06,168 --> 00:43:07,419
See? See?!
807
00:43:07,669 --> 00:43:10,130
This is what happens
when Carly makes
808
00:43:10,255 --> 00:43:12,674
me cry on the inside
like a winner!
809
00:43:14,009 --> 00:43:15,344
Who's Carly?
810
00:43:15,677 --> 00:43:17,137
She's Mark's girlfriend--
811
00:43:17,221 --> 00:43:19,431
and not "friend friend,"
like "boning friend!"
812
00:43:19,515 --> 00:43:20,849
Mark's cheating on you?!
813
00:43:21,058 --> 00:43:22,392
Like fifty times at least.
814
00:43:22,601 --> 00:43:23,602
Are you serious?
Or more!
815
00:43:23,852 --> 00:43:25,521
With who?
Carmela!
816
00:43:25,687 --> 00:43:27,356
But her real name is Carly.
817
00:43:27,606 --> 00:43:29,525
Is this some Tyler
Durden Fight Club thing?
818
00:43:30,359 --> 00:43:31,693
Are you Carly?
No.
819
00:43:31,902 --> 00:43:32,903
Is anyone Carly?
820
00:43:33,195 --> 00:43:34,863
Please focus.
I am focused!
821
00:43:35,114 --> 00:43:38,700
I don't want to keep explaining this.
Carmela is Carly!
822
00:43:38,951 --> 00:43:40,953
The feng shui
spatialist chick.
823
00:43:41,203 --> 00:43:42,538
Yes.
Oh, my God!
824
00:43:44,540 --> 00:43:45,624
Are you okay?
825
00:43:46,041 --> 00:43:47,376
Yeah, I'm fine.
826
00:43:48,210 --> 00:43:50,879
I never liked that guy.
I never liked him.
827
00:43:51,130 --> 00:43:54,967
I told you that before you married him.
What a piece of shit!
828
00:43:55,217 --> 00:43:58,637
Did you know she was his mistress
when she was in the house?
829
00:43:58,887 --> 00:44:01,390
I thought she was
his ex-mistress, but...
830
00:44:01,723 --> 00:44:03,892
...it turns out they're
still seeing each other.
831
00:44:04,143 --> 00:44:05,561
That makes sense.
832
00:44:05,686 --> 00:44:07,062
I heard him on
the phone with her...
833
00:44:07,312 --> 00:44:10,065
...then he comes to me,
"Oh, I have to go golfing."
834
00:44:10,315 --> 00:44:14,570
In Connecticut. "With the
Canadian crew." Which is code.
835
00:44:14,820 --> 00:44:16,488
For what?
Ca.
836
00:44:16,905 --> 00:44:18,824
Ca?
Ca.
837
00:44:19,408 --> 00:44:20,993
Ca?
Caaarly.
838
00:44:21,243 --> 00:44:24,079
Carly. Carmela. You're
talking about Carmela.
839
00:44:24,413 --> 00:44:27,749
She doesn't even know that I
know they're still together.
840
00:44:28,000 --> 00:44:29,751
She pretends
to be my friend,
841
00:44:29,918 --> 00:44:31,670
but she's spying on me,
like a double agent.
842
00:44:31,920 --> 00:44:33,088
And you let her
because...?
843
00:44:33,338 --> 00:44:35,007
That's how you run
a double agent.
844
00:44:35,257 --> 00:44:38,760
I don't even know if she's American.
I don't know.
845
00:44:39,011 --> 00:44:41,847
Katie, if she's full of
shit, call her out on it.
846
00:44:42,097 --> 00:44:44,766
Deal with her. And then
deal with the real problem.
847
00:44:45,100 --> 00:44:47,102
Oh, Mark.
Yes! Mark.
848
00:44:47,936 --> 00:44:50,939
Yes. Okay.
Right. Mmm-hmm.
849
00:44:51,106 --> 00:44:53,108
Where are you going?
I don't know.
850
00:44:55,027 --> 00:44:56,361
I'm really happy
we're doing this.
851
00:44:56,486 --> 00:44:57,863
Are you?
852
00:44:59,781 --> 00:45:01,950
How do you feel? I don't know.
How do you feel?
853
00:45:02,201 --> 00:45:04,536
I fee like I owe you an
apology for the other night.
854
00:45:04,786 --> 00:45:06,455
Do you?
Yeah.
855
00:45:06,788 --> 00:45:09,041
Sometimes I can be
more tough than love.
856
00:45:09,291 --> 00:45:10,375
Can you?
857
00:45:11,793 --> 00:45:15,130
Yeah. I just wanted to clear
the air, and say that...
858
00:45:15,881 --> 00:45:18,717
...whatever happens between you
and Mark is your business.
859
00:45:19,051 --> 00:45:20,802
Oh, is it?
860
00:45:21,803 --> 00:45:23,305
Yeah. Are you okay?
861
00:45:23,680 --> 00:45:25,807
Are you still sleeping
with my husband?
862
00:45:25,974 --> 00:45:27,643
What?
You heard me.
863
00:45:28,393 --> 00:45:29,561
Unbelievable.
864
00:45:30,729 --> 00:45:32,397
I was crazy to think
we could be friends.
865
00:45:32,648 --> 00:45:34,650
You don't get to walk out.
Don't ice me out.
866
00:45:35,651 --> 00:45:37,486
No. No. You can't--
What? What?
867
00:45:37,819 --> 00:45:40,322
You can't ice me out.
I'm going to ice you out.
868
00:45:40,572 --> 00:45:42,157
Here's my ice shield.
869
00:45:42,407 --> 00:45:43,742
Then what,
you pull out my weave?
870
00:45:43,867 --> 00:45:45,244
Just tell me the truth!
871
00:45:45,494 --> 00:45:48,413
You want to know the truth?
Your husband sucks!
872
00:45:48,664 --> 00:45:53,168
I am not sleeping with him! And the
fact you think I would, really hurts!
873
00:45:54,169 --> 00:45:56,546
Well, shit! I don't know!
All I know is what
874
00:45:56,672 --> 00:45:59,049
I heard,
and he's meeting somebody!
875
00:45:59,341 --> 00:46:01,677
Well, not me! So he's
cheating on both of us.
876
00:46:01,885 --> 00:46:04,179
Oh, my God, that's it!
He's cheating on us!
877
00:46:04,388 --> 00:46:06,056
I was kidding about that.
878
00:46:06,348 --> 00:46:09,851
If he's not seeing you-- I'm so
sorry I said that, that sucks--
879
00:46:10,060 --> 00:46:13,522
--but if he isn't seeing you,
he's seeing someone else.
880
00:46:13,730 --> 00:46:16,191
Think about it.
Between the two of us...
881
00:46:16,400 --> 00:46:19,236
...he has the perfect woman.
What else would he need?
882
00:46:19,528 --> 00:46:22,239
The one thing
we're not giving him--sex.
883
00:46:36,378 --> 00:46:37,546
Katie?
884
00:46:37,713 --> 00:46:38,714
Time to go, sweetie.
885
00:46:38,922 --> 00:46:42,551
Okay. Are you all packed for
your business meetings?
886
00:46:43,385 --> 00:46:45,095
I hate working
on the weekends.
887
00:46:46,054 --> 00:46:48,432
I feel bad for you.
Let me walk you out.
888
00:46:56,231 --> 00:46:57,733
Have a great weekend.
889
00:46:57,899 --> 00:46:59,401
You, too!
890
00:46:59,735 --> 00:47:01,069
Bye!
891
00:47:01,737 --> 00:47:03,739
You look gorgeous today.
Thanks, honey.
892
00:47:05,407 --> 00:47:06,408
Safe flight!
893
00:47:06,616 --> 00:47:08,452
I'll call you
when I get in.
894
00:47:09,244 --> 00:47:10,412
Don't forget.
(ENGINE STARTS)
895
00:47:27,929 --> 00:47:29,556
(CELL PHONE CHIMING)
896
00:47:40,567 --> 00:47:42,152
(TIRES SCREECHING)
897
00:47:52,788 --> 00:47:56,291
Let's go! He's probably
halfway there already!
898
00:47:57,000 --> 00:47:58,460
We're going to lose him.
899
00:47:58,960 --> 00:48:00,337
What's Thunder doing?
900
00:48:00,629 --> 00:48:03,465
No,no,no,no,no!
Are you kidding me? No!
901
00:48:04,966 --> 00:48:05,967
Sorry.
902
00:48:06,134 --> 00:48:09,971
Jesus, that was... I think that
might have been his balls.
903
00:48:10,305 --> 00:48:12,140
It was-- Ugh!
904
00:48:55,225 --> 00:48:58,687
CARLY: I don't think we should rush
into anything. What are you doing?
905
00:49:04,526 --> 00:49:07,612
When you're divvying up friends
in the divorce, keep this one.
906
00:49:13,118 --> 00:49:15,454
You won't see anything
through those hedges.
907
00:49:15,787 --> 00:49:19,291
You're being a very negative detective.
Give me a boost up.
908
00:49:19,541 --> 00:49:21,626
KATE:
Look, he won't catch us.
909
00:49:22,711 --> 00:49:24,087
(BOTH GRUNTING)
910
00:49:24,421 --> 00:49:25,714
KATE: Go higher.
911
00:49:28,133 --> 00:49:32,137
Oh, hell, no!
Now he's crossed the line!
912
00:49:33,305 --> 00:49:34,890
What? What is it?
913
00:49:35,140 --> 00:49:36,475
It's a Jetta.
914
00:49:36,725 --> 00:49:38,059
It's a Jetta!
So?
915
00:49:38,310 --> 00:49:40,145
Only young, hot girls
drive Jettas!
916
00:49:40,479 --> 00:49:41,480
I had a Jetta.
917
00:49:41,730 --> 00:49:43,732
That's what
I'm talking about.
918
00:49:43,815 --> 00:49:44,816
(BEEPING)
919
00:49:47,235 --> 00:49:48,236
(YELPS)
920
00:49:56,953 --> 00:49:58,121
Hi, there.
921
00:49:58,622 --> 00:50:01,500
I was out for a jog
and my hammies locked up.
922
00:50:01,833 --> 00:50:04,669
When that happens,
I have to stretch.
923
00:50:05,003 --> 00:50:06,004
CARLY: I'm not Gumby!
924
00:50:06,254 --> 00:50:08,256
Just pulled over
for a little stretch.
925
00:50:08,548 --> 00:50:09,549
(GRUNTS)
926
00:50:11,301 --> 00:50:13,136
That feels so much better.
927
00:50:15,430 --> 00:50:18,600
Yup. That's a lot better.
928
00:50:20,268 --> 00:50:21,561
(MAN SPEAKING SPANISH)
929
00:50:21,937 --> 00:50:25,941
You got to stretch it out.
Stretch it out.
930
00:50:26,858 --> 00:50:28,026
(GRUNTING)
931
00:50:35,700 --> 00:50:37,369
That is it!
932
00:50:37,619 --> 00:50:38,954
From now on,
you have to tell me
933
00:50:39,079 --> 00:50:40,372
what we're doing,
where we're going...
934
00:50:40,622 --> 00:50:43,208
...and what's happening, 'cause
I can't take it anymore!
935
00:50:43,458 --> 00:50:44,793
Let's go!
936
00:50:45,544 --> 00:50:47,045
Oh, God!
937
00:51:02,310 --> 00:51:06,231
PHIL: Well, well. Look who's
here-- the wife and the mistress.
938
00:51:06,481 --> 00:51:07,816
I'm not a mistress.
939
00:51:08,233 --> 00:51:09,901
Not technically, anyway.
940
00:51:10,151 --> 00:51:11,987
KATE: She comes in peace,
so be nice.
941
00:51:12,153 --> 00:51:14,155
All right. Come on in.
942
00:51:15,240 --> 00:51:18,410
So can I ask, what the
hell are you two up to?
943
00:51:18,743 --> 00:51:20,412
Don't say it's
a social call, because you
944
00:51:20,537 --> 00:51:22,247
haven't been here
since I bought the place.
945
00:51:22,497 --> 00:51:25,750
We think Mark has another
mistress-- we're going to find her.
946
00:51:25,834 --> 00:51:26,835
Mmm-hmm.
947
00:51:29,254 --> 00:51:32,674
And what do you plan on doing
if you find this girl?
948
00:51:33,091 --> 00:51:35,427
Don't come at me
with all your...
949
00:51:35,677 --> 00:51:37,929
...weird little man logic.
This is a...
950
00:51:38,179 --> 00:51:42,183
...one-day-at- a-time operation.
Today is light recon day.
951
00:51:42,684 --> 00:51:45,020
A grappling hook?
Really?
952
00:51:46,771 --> 00:51:47,939
Damn.
953
00:52:01,953 --> 00:52:04,205
Look, I don't know if
you're here out of...
954
00:52:04,539 --> 00:52:06,124
...morbid curiosity,
or you and Kate
955
00:52:06,249 --> 00:52:07,792
are the weirdest
friends ever--
956
00:52:08,209 --> 00:52:09,878
We are.
The weirdest friends ever.
957
00:52:10,462 --> 00:52:11,880
--But she's a good person.
958
00:52:12,130 --> 00:52:15,050
And though Mark's an asshole,
they had something real.
959
00:52:15,300 --> 00:52:17,093
And when she's done
running around with you,
960
00:52:17,218 --> 00:52:19,012
she'll realize
that's gone.
961
00:52:19,095 --> 00:52:20,305
And it's going to suck.
962
00:52:20,972 --> 00:52:22,057
So...
963
00:52:22,641 --> 00:52:24,726
...try not to make that
part any worse for her.
964
00:52:25,810 --> 00:52:27,062
Okay.
965
00:52:30,148 --> 00:52:31,149
KATE: Okay.
966
00:52:31,816 --> 00:52:32,901
They are on the move.
967
00:52:33,902 --> 00:52:35,070
KATE: Okay.
968
00:52:35,570 --> 00:52:36,905
Nothing.
969
00:52:39,574 --> 00:52:40,909
Okay.
970
00:52:42,577 --> 00:52:44,579
He's up! CARLY: Really?
What's he doing?
971
00:52:44,871 --> 00:52:45,914
Kissing.
Uh-huh.
972
00:52:48,083 --> 00:52:49,417
KATE: Probably tongue.
973
00:52:49,501 --> 00:52:50,502
CARLY: Mmm-hmm.
974
00:52:51,086 --> 00:52:52,754
KATE: Probably enjoying.
975
00:52:53,046 --> 00:52:54,047
CARLY: Great.
976
00:52:54,255 --> 00:52:57,759
KATE: Okay, target is moving!
Target is on the move.
977
00:52:58,093 --> 00:52:59,177
All right.
978
00:52:59,260 --> 00:53:01,262
Oh, he's wearing
those cute shorts
979
00:53:01,429 --> 00:53:03,390
I got him for Christmas.
They look good.
980
00:53:03,473 --> 00:53:04,641
Okay.
981
00:53:04,724 --> 00:53:06,393
I can't believe
you're not interested.
982
00:53:06,601 --> 00:53:08,228
Just promise
when you meet her...
983
00:53:08,311 --> 00:53:11,856
...you won't lose your shit like you
did with me. Don't say you didn't.
984
00:53:11,940 --> 00:53:16,194
I did, because I was a mistress-virgin
and you were the first.
985
00:53:16,277 --> 00:53:18,863
Now I'm all worn in
like an old glove.
986
00:53:18,947 --> 00:53:20,740
She's getting UP!
987
00:53:21,533 --> 00:53:22,534
(GASPS)
988
00:53:23,785 --> 00:53:24,953
Oh, my God.
989
00:53:25,787 --> 00:53:27,288
Holy shit!
What?
990
00:53:28,081 --> 00:53:30,083
Oh, come on!
991
00:53:30,583 --> 00:53:31,918
What is that?
992
00:53:32,085 --> 00:53:34,003
Let me see. Let me see!
993
00:53:34,337 --> 00:53:36,506
Okay, but you're
not going to like it.
994
00:53:36,589 --> 00:53:37,590
Ah!
995
00:53:46,307 --> 00:53:48,476
She makes me look
like I'm wearing a diaper!
996
00:53:48,768 --> 00:53:50,437
You think she had that made?
997
00:53:50,645 --> 00:53:54,774
No. When you have a body like that,
everything fits you perfectly.
998
00:54:01,990 --> 00:54:06,369
This is just so unoriginal,
Mark! So cliché!
999
00:54:12,667 --> 00:54:14,836
She's the perfect
ten lemon tart...
1000
00:54:15,044 --> 00:54:16,129
Maybe an eleven.
1001
00:54:16,171 --> 00:54:18,298
...double-D, natural double-D.
A triple-D.
1002
00:54:18,506 --> 00:54:20,300
CARLY: It's like a midlife
crisis mistress!
1003
00:54:20,383 --> 00:54:23,344
She's like a cliché of every
wife's waking nightmare!
1004
00:54:23,636 --> 00:54:26,306
You have to admit, that's pretty good.
Seriously.
1005
00:54:26,514 --> 00:54:28,516
Okay, fine.
She's beautiful.
1006
00:54:28,808 --> 00:54:31,478
At some point you say--
I play tennis, right?
1007
00:54:31,686 --> 00:54:34,856
But if I play against John
McEnroe, I expect to lose.
1008
00:54:35,190 --> 00:54:36,524
You know what?
Right?
1009
00:54:36,816 --> 00:54:38,193
I am McEnroe!
1010
00:54:38,693 --> 00:54:40,695
What are you doing?!
1011
00:54:41,029 --> 00:54:43,698
Where are you going?! Wait!
1012
00:54:44,199 --> 00:54:45,533
No!!!
1013
00:54:46,701 --> 00:54:49,037
Stop!!!
1014
00:54:52,874 --> 00:54:55,210
What happened to being calm?!
1015
00:55:05,053 --> 00:55:06,387
Carlyl!
1016
00:55:06,721 --> 00:55:07,847
Carly!
1017
00:55:08,723 --> 00:55:10,725
Stop!!!
1018
00:55:23,404 --> 00:55:25,740
CARLY: I can't believe
he was cheating on me!
1019
00:55:26,074 --> 00:55:28,368
KATE: Oh, boo-hoo!
He cheated on me, too!
1020
00:55:28,535 --> 00:55:30,870
CARLY: You're the wife!
He's supposed to cheat on you!
1021
00:55:31,079 --> 00:55:32,163
Oh, my God!
1022
00:55:32,247 --> 00:55:34,249
Stop, you crazy housewife!
1023
00:55:34,415 --> 00:55:38,253
Stop the grappling!
I'm strong when I'm mad!!
1024
00:55:40,255 --> 00:55:41,923
(BOTH SCREAMING)
1025
00:55:43,716 --> 00:55:45,718
What's going on?
1026
00:55:48,805 --> 00:55:50,265
(BOTH PANTING)
1027
00:55:52,433 --> 00:55:53,601
BOTH: Hi.
1028
00:55:56,104 --> 00:55:58,565
I just can't believe
he'd lie to me.
1029
00:55:58,773 --> 00:56:00,942
I really thought
we were soulmates.
1030
00:56:01,609 --> 00:56:04,612
Oh, my God, lam so sorry.
I can't believe I said that.
1031
00:56:04,946 --> 00:56:07,240
You're his soulmate.
I'm a whore.
1032
00:56:07,448 --> 00:56:11,411
You must hate me so much. If it's
any consolation, I hate me more.
1033
00:56:11,619 --> 00:56:13,913
I don't hate you at all.
1034
00:56:14,122 --> 00:56:16,457
I got all that out of
my system with that one.
1035
00:56:16,749 --> 00:56:20,295
You're so amazing, to be friends
with your husband's mistress.
1036
00:56:20,587 --> 00:56:23,089
Yeah, it's like
a dream come true.
1037
00:56:23,298 --> 00:56:26,801
Ignore her. She's working
through some stuff right now.
1038
00:56:27,093 --> 00:56:31,139
She's kind of troubled. But you
smell amazing. What is that?
1039
00:56:31,472 --> 00:56:32,932
I think it's just sweat.
1040
00:56:33,975 --> 00:56:36,477
The worst part about this is,
you seem so nice...
1041
00:56:36,603 --> 00:56:38,980
...and he had me believing
you were the devil.
1042
00:56:39,272 --> 00:56:40,273
Wait, what?
1043
00:56:40,481 --> 00:56:43,026
He said you cheated on him,
then asked for a divorce.
1044
00:56:43,651 --> 00:56:46,487
He said that...
I was the cheater?
1045
00:56:46,821 --> 00:56:49,324
That's what he said?
That I cheated?
1046
00:56:49,616 --> 00:56:50,617
I'm so sorry.
1047
00:56:50,825 --> 00:56:54,329
That is so-- Okay.
That's-- What an asshole!
1048
00:56:54,621 --> 00:56:56,122
He's a liar, Kate.
Who cares?
1049
00:56:56,331 --> 00:56:57,999
Because it's not fair.
1050
00:56:58,333 --> 00:57:00,627
He made me the bad guy.
And he's divorcing me?
1051
00:57:00,835 --> 00:57:02,670
You know it's not actually
happening, right?
1052
00:57:02,962 --> 00:57:05,381
He could pick any scenario,
and he picks that?
1053
00:57:05,465 --> 00:57:06,883
And makes me
the villain?
1054
00:57:06,966 --> 00:57:09,344
And then divorces
me for fake-cheating?
1055
00:57:09,636 --> 00:57:11,638
I shouldn't have told you.
I'm sorry.
1056
00:57:11,846 --> 00:57:14,182
It's not your fault
I married a monster.
1057
00:57:14,474 --> 00:57:18,019
You are innocent in all this.
Let's go back to Phil's.
1058
00:57:18,311 --> 00:57:19,312
Okay, let's go.
1059
00:57:19,520 --> 00:57:21,689
Wait! What do I do?
You can't just leave me.
1060
00:57:21,856 --> 00:57:23,983
Mark will be back
any minute!
1061
00:57:24,317 --> 00:57:25,693
We'll get your number.
Can we keep her?
1062
00:57:25,985 --> 00:57:28,488
No, we can't keep her!
We have a dog at home!
1063
00:57:28,696 --> 00:57:30,865
You pulled my hair,
which is totally--
1064
00:57:31,199 --> 00:57:33,368
PHIL: Hey, hey, hey!
1065
00:57:33,660 --> 00:57:34,994
Watch what
I taught Thunder.
1066
00:57:35,370 --> 00:57:36,496
Thunder, get me a beer.
1067
00:57:38,665 --> 00:57:40,333
KATE: Unbelievable.
CARLY: Wow!
1068
00:57:40,541 --> 00:57:41,876
KATE: That's crazy.
CARLY: It's a miracle.
1069
00:57:42,168 --> 00:57:43,878
KATE: That dog is trying to break me.
CARLY: He really is.
1070
00:57:45,546 --> 00:57:46,714
Good boy.
1071
00:57:47,048 --> 00:57:48,883
So, how was the stalking?
1072
00:57:49,342 --> 00:57:50,927
Thunder! Traitor.
1073
00:57:51,219 --> 00:57:52,679
How'd it go, weirdo?
1074
00:57:53,346 --> 00:57:57,058
It was good! We ran on the
beach, met Mark's new mistress--
1075
00:57:57,350 --> 00:57:58,351
CARLY: Amber.
1076
00:57:58,559 --> 00:57:59,560
Twenty-two, super hot.
1077
00:57:59,852 --> 00:58:00,853
Are you jealous?
1078
00:58:01,062 --> 00:58:03,690
No, I'm not jealous. I just don't
have an insane girl crush.
1079
00:58:03,898 --> 00:58:05,525
I think it's good
she's super hot.
1080
00:58:05,650 --> 00:58:07,235
It brings up
our group average.
1081
00:58:07,527 --> 00:58:09,362
This isn't
frickin' Sister Wives.
1082
00:58:09,570 --> 00:58:11,030
You sure you're not angry?
1083
00:58:11,239 --> 00:58:13,157
Letting it out is better
than having to tell the cops
1084
00:58:13,241 --> 00:58:14,200
you didn't mean to
hug her to death.
1085
00:58:14,283 --> 00:58:15,284
(LAUGHS SARCASTICALLY)
1086
00:58:15,368 --> 00:58:18,204
You're so funny! You'll
see when you meet her.
1087
00:58:18,413 --> 00:58:20,581
What? When I meet her?
(LAUGHS)
1088
00:58:22,583 --> 00:58:23,918
KATE: Up high.
1089
00:58:24,002 --> 00:58:25,003
(LAUGHS)
1090
00:58:26,045 --> 00:58:27,380
You look so pretty!
1091
00:58:27,547 --> 00:58:28,881
AMBER: You look so pretty.
1092
00:58:28,965 --> 00:58:30,258
CARLY: It's really annoying.
1093
00:58:30,383 --> 00:58:31,592
PHIL: It's just bad.
1094
00:58:33,094 --> 00:58:34,929
What's that up there?
1095
00:58:35,263 --> 00:58:37,390
That's the best
part of the house.
1096
00:58:37,515 --> 00:58:39,600
You'll like it.
Come on. I'll show you.
1097
00:58:40,893 --> 00:58:42,103
KATE: You're such a good girl.
1098
00:58:42,395 --> 00:58:43,521
AMBER: Mark's an asshole!
1099
00:58:43,646 --> 00:58:44,772
KATE: He is.
1100
00:58:51,612 --> 00:58:52,947
Wow.
1101
00:59:03,624 --> 00:59:05,960
I know exactly what
I would do with it.
1102
00:59:08,463 --> 00:59:11,632
I would put a coffee
table right here...
1103
00:59:11,966 --> 00:59:14,469
...so I could have
my morning coffee.
1104
00:59:14,969 --> 00:59:18,431
You can't. There's too much morning sun.
lt would blast you.
1105
00:59:18,639 --> 00:59:22,477
No, this is where I would
want to exist, right here...
1106
00:59:23,478 --> 00:59:24,812
...looking at that.
1107
00:59:25,313 --> 00:59:26,314
You sure?
1108
00:59:27,315 --> 00:59:28,316
Yeah.
1109
00:59:29,650 --> 00:59:31,110
I'll think about it.
1110
00:59:31,444 --> 00:59:32,779
You better.
1111
00:59:33,821 --> 00:59:34,989
Okay.
1112
00:59:36,616 --> 00:59:38,743
(HIP HOP MUSIC PLAYING)
1113
00:59:49,462 --> 00:59:51,672
Kate might actually
have a point about
1114
00:59:51,798 --> 00:59:53,966
her bringing up
the group average.
1115
00:59:55,802 --> 00:59:57,804
Do you care if I smoke?
1116
00:59:58,012 --> 01:00:00,139
No! I kind of
want one, too.
1117
01:00:00,348 --> 01:00:01,474
Since when do you smoke?
1118
01:00:01,682 --> 01:00:03,351
Since whenever
I want to.
1119
01:00:03,643 --> 01:00:05,186
PHIL: This should be good.
1120
01:00:05,520 --> 01:00:07,063
If we find any
more mistresses,
1121
01:00:07,188 --> 01:00:08,689
I'll have to
send her to rehab.
1122
01:00:31,546 --> 01:00:32,547
(GROANS)
1123
01:00:40,221 --> 01:00:41,222
(SIGHS)
1124
01:00:43,391 --> 01:00:44,892
PHIL: Don't worry,
we didn't hook up.
1125
01:00:45,059 --> 01:00:47,353
We didn't? Oh, thank God.
1126
01:00:47,687 --> 01:00:49,897
You took off your clothes
to go skinny dipping.
1127
01:00:50,565 --> 01:00:51,983
Really?
1128
01:00:52,108 --> 01:00:53,526
You girls started
in on the tequila...
1129
01:00:53,734 --> 01:00:55,403
...and it all went
downhill from there.
1130
01:00:56,362 --> 01:00:58,865
You wouldn't get dressed, so
I buttoned you in backwards.
1131
01:00:59,073 --> 01:01:00,366
Shut up.
1132
01:01:01,075 --> 01:01:04,370
So let me get this straight.
I came into your bed naked...
1133
01:01:04,453 --> 01:01:05,580
...and tried to molest you,
1134
01:01:05,663 --> 01:01:09,709
so you made a straitjacket and a
pillow fort to protect yourself.
1135
01:01:09,917 --> 01:01:11,043
Yeah.
1136
01:01:11,919 --> 01:01:13,880
(SIGHS) Oh, my God,
I've hit rock bottom.
1137
01:01:14,088 --> 01:01:15,256
Nah. Don't worry about it.
1138
01:01:15,923 --> 01:01:17,884
We were pretty
out of our heads,
1139
01:01:18,009 --> 01:01:19,927
and I like to think
I'm a good guy, so...
1140
01:01:20,887 --> 01:01:23,764
So you needed
the pillows to resist me.
1141
01:01:24,473 --> 01:01:26,767
Let's say I was
hedging my willpower.
1142
01:01:29,770 --> 01:01:31,272
I'm going to take a shower.
1143
01:01:41,616 --> 01:01:42,950
Good morning!
1144
01:01:44,452 --> 01:01:45,453
What are you guys doing?
1145
01:01:46,287 --> 01:01:49,457
Phil went for a run
and Amber's making frittatas.
1146
01:01:49,790 --> 01:01:51,292
Have you packed?
I want to get on
1147
01:01:51,459 --> 01:01:52,919
the road before
traffic starts.
1148
01:01:53,127 --> 01:01:55,963
No, 'cause then I have to
go home and deal with Mark.
1149
01:01:56,756 --> 01:01:58,424
I was thinking,
what sucks...
1150
01:01:58,633 --> 01:02:02,637
...is that he should be the one freaking
out, not me. I didn't do anything.
1151
01:02:02,929 --> 01:02:06,641
Instead, he's totally fine and I'm
sitting here with the two of you...
1152
01:02:06,933 --> 01:02:08,768
...pretending
not to know you...
1153
01:02:08,976 --> 01:02:12,146
...and on top of it, I have
to get my ducks in a row.
1154
01:02:12,438 --> 01:02:13,773
What do you want to do?
1155
01:02:13,981 --> 01:02:17,318
This may sound wrong, but I
kind of want him to hurt.
1156
01:02:17,652 --> 01:02:19,320
I want to be the one...
1157
01:02:19,612 --> 01:02:21,489
...who makes him
start a new life
1158
01:02:21,614 --> 01:02:23,449
because i took
it away from him.
1159
01:02:23,658 --> 01:02:26,994
I want him to feel
what I feel, but worse.
1160
01:02:27,161 --> 01:02:29,330
So you're talking about
maximum pain, right?
1161
01:02:29,956 --> 01:02:31,332
We should kick
him in the balls!
1162
01:02:32,833 --> 01:02:34,961
That's like
a really good thought, and
1163
01:02:35,086 --> 01:02:37,171
I like the way your
brain works, but...
1164
01:02:37,463 --> 01:02:40,341
...we're thinking about something
a little bigger than that.
1165
01:02:40,633 --> 01:02:42,510
It doesn't matter anyway.
1166
01:02:42,635 --> 01:02:44,011
He's always going
to wind up on top
1167
01:02:44,178 --> 01:02:45,554
because he's
a killer and I'm not.
1168
01:02:45,888 --> 01:02:47,807
That's not true.
You're not alone.
1169
01:02:48,015 --> 01:02:49,350
You have us.
Exactly.
1170
01:02:49,684 --> 01:02:51,978
Put the Lawyer, the Wife
and the Boobs together...
1171
01:02:52,061 --> 01:02:53,479
...you have
a perfect killing machine.
1172
01:02:53,646 --> 01:02:54,647
Yes! I do?
1173
01:02:54,855 --> 01:02:57,149
I know how assholes
do asshole-y things...
1174
01:02:57,358 --> 01:03:00,861
...you know how Mark does
everything, and Amber knows...
1175
01:03:02,697 --> 01:03:04,365
We'll find out
what Amber knows.
1176
01:03:04,657 --> 01:03:05,658
What are you saying?
1177
01:03:05,866 --> 01:03:08,202
I'm saying that if you
want to take him down...
1178
01:03:08,494 --> 01:03:11,372
...then let's take him down.
We have him surrounded.
1179
01:03:11,539 --> 01:03:12,540
Surrounded!
1180
01:03:12,623 --> 01:03:14,709
If we put our
brains together...
1181
01:03:14,834 --> 01:03:16,669
The three of us...
1182
01:03:16,794 --> 01:03:18,421
...can be just as
shady as he can.
1183
01:03:19,005 --> 01:03:19,964
I am in.
1184
01:03:20,047 --> 01:03:21,716
Are you in?
I'm in!
1185
01:03:47,241 --> 01:03:48,743
Hi, honey!
1186
01:03:52,747 --> 01:03:53,748
Mmm...
1187
01:03:56,208 --> 01:03:57,543
it tastes different today.
1188
01:03:57,752 --> 01:03:59,086
I added kiwi.
1189
01:04:00,755 --> 01:04:02,089
I like it.
1190
01:04:02,256 --> 01:04:03,549
I'll keep adding it!
1191
01:04:07,261 --> 01:04:09,263
(MOUTHING)
Fuck you! Fuck you!
1192
01:04:32,578 --> 01:04:35,623
I was going crazy without you.
I'm sorry for being a jerk.
1193
01:04:35,956 --> 01:04:38,459
No, no. You know what?
I overreacted.
1194
01:04:38,793 --> 01:04:40,628
I did. I really did.
1195
01:04:40,961 --> 01:04:43,422
It's just that you were
going to meet my dad...
1196
01:04:43,631 --> 01:04:45,132
...and I've been so
worried about him.
1197
01:04:45,216 --> 01:04:46,217
(CELL PHONE BUZZING)
1198
01:04:46,300 --> 01:04:48,636
He's going through so much
with this divorce, and--
1199
01:04:48,969 --> 01:04:51,639
Sorry. Do you mind?
I'll just be a sec.
1200
01:04:51,972 --> 01:04:53,307
No, that's fine.
1201
01:04:54,642 --> 01:04:55,768
Mike.
1202
01:04:58,312 --> 01:05:01,148
No, I was setting the mike.
What do you want?
1203
01:05:08,781 --> 01:05:10,783
I love this tie.
1204
01:05:26,674 --> 01:05:28,175
Hold that thought.
1205
01:05:29,468 --> 01:05:30,845
(CLEARS TH THROAT)
1206
01:05:34,056 --> 01:05:37,226
I'm sorry.
Um...where were we?
1207
01:05:37,476 --> 01:05:38,477
My dad's divorce.
1208
01:05:38,727 --> 01:05:39,895
Right.
1209
01:05:40,396 --> 01:05:42,064
You're worried about him.
I am.
1210
01:05:42,356 --> 01:05:44,775
He's going to have to give
this woman half his money.
1211
01:05:44,900 --> 01:05:47,361
Half of everything he has.
1212
01:05:47,695 --> 01:05:51,240
And she does nothing. Just lays
around the house all day long.
1213
01:05:51,574 --> 01:05:53,534
He has been
working his whole life...
1214
01:05:53,742 --> 01:05:57,037
...and she is going to take half of it!
It's not fair.
1215
01:05:57,246 --> 01:06:00,082
He can't give away
what he doesn't have.
1216
01:06:00,416 --> 01:06:02,418
You mean he should
hide his money?
1217
01:06:02,710 --> 01:06:04,420
Not hide. Lose.
1218
01:06:04,753 --> 01:06:06,422
I don't understand.
1219
01:06:07,214 --> 01:06:09,842
Maybe I should just
tell him in person.
1220
01:06:11,385 --> 01:06:12,803
You would do that?
1221
01:06:12,887 --> 01:06:13,888
(GRUNTS)
1222
01:06:13,971 --> 01:06:16,056
(CHUCKLES) Whoa!
1223
01:06:16,849 --> 01:06:17,850
(GROANS)
1224
01:06:19,852 --> 01:06:21,562
Are you okay?
Actually, no.
1225
01:06:21,854 --> 01:06:23,856
We should go. Now.
1226
01:06:24,190 --> 01:06:26,192
Really?
Please.
1227
01:06:35,659 --> 01:06:37,077
(FARTING)
1228
01:06:38,704 --> 01:06:39,747
Are you okay?
1229
01:06:39,872 --> 01:06:40,873
Something's not right.
1230
01:06:43,083 --> 01:06:44,418
You go.
I'll call you later.
1231
01:06:44,710 --> 01:06:46,420
I can wait for you.
I don't mind.
1232
01:06:46,712 --> 01:06:48,714
No, it's fine.
It's good.
1233
01:06:49,215 --> 01:06:51,300
Oh, shit! Oh!
1234
01:06:53,594 --> 01:06:55,095
Oh! Come on!
1235
01:06:56,764 --> 01:06:58,140
Oh!
1236
01:07:00,768 --> 01:07:02,102
(GROANING)
1237
01:07:05,814 --> 01:07:07,441
(FARTING)
1238
01:07:08,108 --> 01:07:09,735
(EXCLAIMING)
1239
01:07:12,071 --> 01:07:13,697
(GASPING)
1240
01:07:15,115 --> 01:07:16,700
(PANTING) Oh, God!
1241
01:07:16,784 --> 01:07:18,118
Oh! That was painful.
1242
01:07:20,120 --> 01:07:22,122
Oh, my God!
1243
01:07:22,206 --> 01:07:23,791
No! No!
1244
01:07:24,625 --> 01:07:26,418
(sesame) on, no.
1245
01:07:31,590 --> 01:07:32,925
Hey, buddy?
1246
01:07:34,635 --> 01:07:36,011
Can you help me out?
1247
01:07:36,303 --> 01:07:38,305
I need you to
buy me some pants.
1248
01:07:38,639 --> 01:07:40,808
Things got really
tough in here, huh?
1249
01:07:41,267 --> 01:07:43,143
I'm a 34-inch waist.
The fit doesn't
1250
01:07:43,269 --> 01:07:45,104
have to be perfect.
I like blue.
1251
01:07:46,105 --> 01:07:47,147
Or green!
1252
01:07:47,481 --> 01:07:48,482
(FARTING)
1253
01:07:49,191 --> 01:07:50,609
You still there?
1254
01:07:53,279 --> 01:07:54,613
Hello?
1255
01:07:56,323 --> 01:07:57,324
(DOOR OPENS)
1256
01:07:58,033 --> 01:07:59,451
(BREATHING HEAVILY)
1257
01:08:07,001 --> 01:08:08,669
What happened to you?
1258
01:08:09,003 --> 01:08:11,338
I had a fecal incident.
1259
01:08:11,672 --> 01:08:13,966
I needed some pants
and the only person
1260
01:08:14,091 --> 01:08:16,343
who didn't try to
rob me was a hipster.
1261
01:08:16,677 --> 01:08:19,805
I'm sorry, did you say you
had a fecal incident?
1262
01:08:19,888 --> 01:08:21,265
Like you pooped your pants?
1263
01:08:21,348 --> 01:08:24,852
Yes, Kate. Exactly like that.
I shit my pants.
1264
01:08:25,477 --> 01:08:29,356
And you know what? It's about to
happen again, so if you don't mind...
1265
01:08:29,648 --> 01:08:32,359
...I'm going to go see if our
toilet can take a punch.
1266
01:08:33,444 --> 01:08:35,237
(LAUGHING)
1267
01:08:36,030 --> 01:08:37,406
(INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS)
1268
01:08:37,531 --> 01:08:39,325
(INDISTINCT SHOUTING)
1269
01:08:56,884 --> 01:08:58,552
You found it!
I did.
1270
01:08:59,219 --> 01:09:00,554
Come sit down.
1271
01:09:01,055 --> 01:09:03,057
Is your shirt see-through?
1272
01:09:03,265 --> 01:09:06,393
The girl at the shop told me that
sheer is the next big thing.
1273
01:09:06,602 --> 01:09:08,270
Your Indian girl
didn't veto that?
1274
01:09:08,604 --> 01:09:11,440
Ah! I haven't seen her.
We didn't have that twinkle.
1275
01:09:11,857 --> 01:09:13,233
I like sheer shirts.
1276
01:09:13,567 --> 01:09:15,361
Dad, this is Amber.
1277
01:09:16,362 --> 01:09:17,363
Hi, Amber.
1278
01:09:18,405 --> 01:09:19,948
Hi. Um...
1279
01:09:20,741 --> 01:09:22,159
Mmm...
1280
01:09:24,453 --> 01:09:26,121
I'm fine, thank you.
1281
01:09:27,915 --> 01:09:30,918
I'm really okay. Thank you.
I hate being touched.
1282
01:09:31,377 --> 01:09:34,380
Where are we? Seriously.
What is this, Saigon?
1283
01:09:34,588 --> 01:09:37,591
Don't make fun of 'Nam.
Best years of my life.
1284
01:09:37,925 --> 01:09:40,094
This place is awesome.
My neck was so tight.
1285
01:09:40,260 --> 01:09:42,930
What's it called? "No
Hands." Isn't it great?
1286
01:09:43,263 --> 01:09:44,306
Watch this.
1287
01:09:45,516 --> 01:09:46,725
(SPEAKING MANDARIN)
1288
01:09:52,648 --> 01:09:54,650
You see? No hands.
1289
01:09:54,983 --> 01:09:56,985
I can't put
my finger on it,
1290
01:09:57,111 --> 01:09:59,154
but there's something
very wrong with that.
1291
01:09:59,446 --> 01:10:03,575
So, what's up? What's this big
mystery you want me to solve?
1292
01:10:03,909 --> 01:10:05,285
Hypothetically...
1293
01:10:05,452 --> 01:10:07,454
...if I wanted to
protect my money
1294
01:10:07,621 --> 01:10:09,623
by "losing" it,
what would I do?
1295
01:10:09,957 --> 01:10:11,291
Losing it?
1296
01:10:12,459 --> 01:10:14,795
You're not working with
hypothetical Feds, are you?
1297
01:10:15,003 --> 01:10:17,089
No! Do you have a
problem with the Feds?
1298
01:10:17,172 --> 01:10:18,215
Actually,
don't tell me.
1299
01:10:18,298 --> 01:10:19,383
What's this guy do?
1300
01:10:19,466 --> 01:10:20,968
Develops start-up
companies.
1301
01:10:21,260 --> 01:10:23,262
Ah, the Chuzzlewit Pinch.
1302
01:10:23,554 --> 01:10:24,555
Oh.
1303
01:10:24,763 --> 01:10:26,807
He ain't losing money,
he's robbing it.
1304
01:10:26,890 --> 01:10:27,891
Hmm...
1305
01:10:28,142 --> 01:10:31,270
Here's what you do-- look
for blind offshore filings.
1306
01:10:31,812 --> 01:10:34,273
Like in Switzerland
or the Bahamas.
1307
01:10:34,648 --> 01:10:37,317
If I was going to "lose"
money, that's where I'd do it.
1308
01:10:37,609 --> 01:10:39,153
Can I have
another drink?
1309
01:10:40,154 --> 01:10:43,323
You okay, baby?
You need my help on this?
1310
01:10:43,782 --> 01:10:46,994
No. I got this.
1311
01:10:51,331 --> 01:10:53,500
Stop frowning before
you break your face.
1312
01:10:54,835 --> 01:10:55,878
Better?
1313
01:10:55,961 --> 01:10:59,506
That's your Evil Genius smile. ls
somebody about to get screwed?
1314
01:10:59,798 --> 01:11:03,177
You screw me, I screw you back.
I'm a lady like that.
1315
01:11:03,844 --> 01:11:05,179
(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)
1316
01:11:07,055 --> 01:11:08,849
A three-way?
Yeah.
1317
01:11:09,850 --> 01:11:10,851
I don't know.
1318
01:11:11,143 --> 01:11:12,144
Please?
1319
01:11:12,686 --> 01:11:15,355
Come on.
You'll love Dana.
1320
01:11:15,856 --> 01:11:16,857
Dana?
1321
01:11:17,357 --> 01:11:22,196
It'll be so hot. I think it'd
be a game changer for us.
1322
01:11:23,989 --> 01:11:25,783
(GROANS)
1323
01:11:28,494 --> 01:11:29,995
All right.
If you really want to.
1324
01:11:30,329 --> 01:11:32,039
Yay! Thank you!
(LAUGHS)
1325
01:11:32,331 --> 01:11:33,665
Dana!
1326
01:11:35,375 --> 01:11:37,169
Baby, this is Dana.
Hmm?
1327
01:11:41,590 --> 01:11:42,591
What?
1328
01:11:42,716 --> 01:11:44,051
(G ROANS AND SCREAMS)
1329
01:11:46,386 --> 01:11:48,222
I knew you'd love her!
1330
01:11:49,473 --> 01:11:50,474
Ah!
1331
01:11:59,733 --> 01:12:00,734
(GASPS)
1332
01:12:07,658 --> 01:12:08,659
Oh!
1333
01:12:10,536 --> 01:12:12,204
What the hell?
1334
01:12:12,579 --> 01:12:13,580
Kate!
1335
01:12:14,206 --> 01:12:16,041
Yes? Kate! !
1336
01:12:16,875 --> 01:12:18,001
Look at this.
1337
01:12:18,126 --> 01:12:19,253
It looks like
you put on weight.
1338
01:12:19,545 --> 01:12:21,880
Yes. And have you ever
seen shit like this?
1339
01:12:23,715 --> 01:12:25,050
Oh, yeah!
1340
01:12:25,217 --> 01:12:26,218
Don't do that.
1341
01:12:26,552 --> 01:12:28,095
Are they sensitive?
Does that hurt?
1342
01:12:28,428 --> 01:12:30,222
Ah!
Tune in Tokyo.
1343
01:12:30,430 --> 01:12:32,015
(LAUGHS)
1344
01:12:32,558 --> 01:12:35,102
lt just looks like
you're a little bloated.
1345
01:12:35,644 --> 01:12:36,728
I have boobs!
1346
01:12:36,812 --> 01:12:38,438
These nipples look
like they've done
1347
01:12:38,605 --> 01:12:40,232
hard time in Africa
feeding a village.
1348
01:12:40,440 --> 01:12:41,608
You're overreacting.
1349
01:12:41,775 --> 01:12:42,943
They're straight
out of the Congo!
1350
01:12:43,235 --> 01:12:44,570
Just tape them up.
1351
01:12:44,778 --> 01:12:47,739
No! I can't go to
work with my tits taped!
1352
01:12:47,948 --> 01:12:49,950
Where are you going?
To do push-ups.
1353
01:12:50,409 --> 01:12:52,244
Did you want
this smoothie?
1354
01:12:52,452 --> 01:12:54,121
AMBER: He's back to
sexting like a freak.
1355
01:12:54,413 --> 01:12:56,164
CARLY: And the pictures!
1356
01:12:56,290 --> 01:12:58,083
Picking up my phone is like
being flashed on the subway.
1357
01:12:58,292 --> 01:13:01,920
KATE: Try living in the same house
with him. All I get is surprise penis.
1358
01:13:02,129 --> 01:13:04,506
It's like his sex
drive is tripled.
1359
01:13:04,590 --> 01:13:06,174
Non-stop.
1360
01:13:06,258 --> 01:13:07,467
I thought you were
giving him hormones.
1361
01:13:07,593 --> 01:13:08,802
I am!
1362
01:13:09,094 --> 01:13:11,096
Enough for
a pre-op transsexual.
1363
01:13:11,305 --> 01:13:12,973
He must be taking Viagra.
1364
01:13:13,265 --> 01:13:15,601
Well, now that sex
is off the table...
1365
01:13:15,809 --> 01:13:17,811
...we have to
speak to one another,
1366
01:13:17,936 --> 01:13:19,938
and I think he's
getting suspicious.
1367
01:13:20,314 --> 01:13:21,648
Really?
Yeah.
1368
01:13:22,149 --> 01:13:23,942
Maybe one of us
should sleep with him.
1369
01:13:24,151 --> 01:13:25,986
Are you crazy?
1370
01:13:26,153 --> 01:13:27,988
Just to let some
steam out of the pot.
1371
01:13:28,280 --> 01:13:30,616
No. Please keep
the lid on the pot.
1372
01:13:30,824 --> 01:13:33,285
You don't think
I can handle it?
1373
01:13:33,619 --> 01:13:35,621
You know what?
I'll do it.
1374
01:13:36,330 --> 01:13:37,664
I'll take one
for the team.
1375
01:13:37,956 --> 01:13:40,125
No. You think he's
an evil sociopath.
1376
01:13:40,334 --> 01:13:42,336
He is!
But better me than you.
1377
01:13:42,461 --> 01:13:44,129
I can weather
a little hate sex.
1378
01:13:44,338 --> 01:13:46,340
I'll do it. I don't
have a lot of feelings.
1379
01:13:46,632 --> 01:13:47,716
Come on.
1380
01:13:47,841 --> 01:13:48,967
You guys have
no faith in me.
1381
01:13:49,176 --> 01:13:50,844
I have a friend
who could do it.
1382
01:13:51,136 --> 01:13:55,474
No,no,no. We are not hiring a
hooker to sleep with my husband.
1383
01:13:55,682 --> 01:13:57,476
She's not a hooker.
She's just a slut.
1384
01:13:57,684 --> 01:14:00,354
Okay, we're done here.
I'm going to do it.
1385
01:14:00,646 --> 01:14:02,648
I'll do it. If you
do it, I do it.
1386
01:14:02,981 --> 01:14:03,982
Me, too.
1387
01:14:04,191 --> 01:14:07,819
Fine. Rock, paper, scissors.
Winner has sex with my husband.
1388
01:14:08,654 --> 01:14:09,821
Really?
1389
01:14:10,155 --> 01:14:11,490
It's the only way.
1390
01:14:11,698 --> 01:14:12,950
One time, or two out of three?
1391
01:14:13,075 --> 01:14:14,326
One time.
1392
01:14:20,999 --> 01:14:22,334
Well, Amber wins.
1393
01:14:22,542 --> 01:14:23,710
You okay with that?
1394
01:14:23,877 --> 01:14:27,172
Yeah. I couldn't
be more okay. What?
1395
01:14:29,216 --> 01:14:30,676
(sesame)
1396
01:14:41,895 --> 01:14:44,398
You're so full of shit.
1397
01:14:46,400 --> 01:14:48,068
(RATTLING)
1398
01:14:49,736 --> 01:14:50,737
Kate!
1399
01:14:50,904 --> 01:14:51,905
Pst!
1400
01:14:54,199 --> 01:14:55,200
Hey!
1401
01:14:56,576 --> 01:14:57,577
Where have you been?
1402
01:14:57,911 --> 01:15:00,747
Are you okay?
I've been trying you all day!
1403
01:15:01,248 --> 01:15:03,458
Can you open
the door for me?
1404
01:15:03,959 --> 01:15:05,377
(SHRIEKING)
Wow.
1405
01:15:06,169 --> 01:15:07,587
(sesame)
1406
01:15:11,258 --> 01:15:13,260
What is going on?
1407
01:15:14,428 --> 01:15:15,762
Wow.
1408
01:15:16,263 --> 01:15:17,889
This is what
it's come to, huh?
1409
01:15:19,057 --> 01:15:21,935
I think I'm having
a nervous breakdown.
1410
01:15:25,772 --> 01:15:27,941
Is it ever going
to get any easier?
1411
01:15:28,775 --> 01:15:29,776
(SIGHS)
1412
01:15:30,402 --> 01:15:32,738
Yeah. It Will.
1413
01:15:34,072 --> 01:15:35,240
When?
1414
01:15:36,241 --> 01:15:38,910
Well, it's going to
suck for a little while.
1415
01:15:39,286 --> 01:15:41,288
Then it's going to
suck a little less.
1416
01:15:41,788 --> 01:15:45,459
And then one day that
ring will just be a ring.
1417
01:15:46,126 --> 01:15:50,797
You'll take it off and it'll just
be something you used to wear.
1418
01:15:51,798 --> 01:15:53,425
I hope so.
1419
01:15:58,430 --> 01:15:59,431
MARK: Katie?
1420
01:15:59,639 --> 01:16:01,475
He's supposed to be with Amber!
Shit!
1421
01:16:01,641 --> 01:16:02,642
MARK: I'm home!
1422
01:16:03,643 --> 01:16:05,645
No, there's no
room under the bed.
1423
01:16:12,194 --> 01:16:14,362
No, I can see you.
Go out the window.
1424
01:16:14,654 --> 01:16:15,989
Go out the window.
1425
01:16:16,114 --> 01:16:17,074
MARK: Honey?
1426
01:16:17,157 --> 01:16:18,492
CARLY:
I'm not going out the window!
1427
01:16:18,700 --> 01:16:20,077
(STUTTERING)
1428
01:16:21,453 --> 01:16:23,997
No! You can't get in there.
I'm ticklish.
1429
01:16:26,208 --> 01:16:29,002
Hi, sweetie!
You're home early!
1430
01:16:30,045 --> 01:16:32,506
I canceled.
What's all this?
1431
01:16:32,714 --> 01:16:36,343
Oh, you know, sometimes
I like to put on my dress.
1432
01:16:37,511 --> 01:16:38,887
It's pretty.
You do?
1433
01:16:39,179 --> 01:16:43,016
You know when you just feel like,
"Normal clothes are blah"...
1434
01:16:43,225 --> 01:16:45,894
...and you're just like,
"I wish I had a costume!"
1435
01:16:46,186 --> 01:16:47,521
You know when
you get like that?
1436
01:16:48,146 --> 01:16:50,148
No. Not really.
1437
01:16:51,024 --> 01:16:53,527
Why don't you come to my
investor dinner this weekend?
1438
01:16:53,985 --> 01:16:55,862
We'll get dressed
up and you can see...
1439
01:16:56,029 --> 01:16:57,197
...what I'm doing with
all your great ideas.
1440
01:16:57,364 --> 01:16:58,532
Okay!
1441
01:16:59,324 --> 01:17:01,368
MARK: I'll get us some drinks.
Scotch okay?
1442
01:17:01,701 --> 01:17:03,870
That'd be perfect,
thank you.
1443
01:17:04,871 --> 01:17:05,872
Get out!
1444
01:17:08,875 --> 01:17:10,210
Be careful.
1445
01:17:10,710 --> 01:17:12,045
Hold on! Wait, wait!
1446
01:17:12,712 --> 01:17:14,297
Ah! (GRUNTS)
1447
01:17:14,840 --> 01:17:16,174
Sorry!
1448
01:17:19,761 --> 01:17:20,762
Ow!
1449
01:17:21,346 --> 01:17:23,181
(INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS)
1450
01:17:28,728 --> 01:17:29,729
Big year.
Great job.
1451
01:17:29,938 --> 01:17:32,065
Kate, you remember
my partner, Nick.
1452
01:17:32,357 --> 01:17:34,067
Yes! Hi.
It's been ages.
1453
01:17:34,401 --> 01:17:35,735
Good to see you again.
1454
01:17:35,944 --> 01:17:38,071
This is Cece.
Kate's the one who
1455
01:17:38,196 --> 01:17:40,282
had the idea for
SwipeSwitch.com.
1456
01:17:40,574 --> 01:17:42,909
Oh, my God! I am
obsessed with that idea.
1457
01:17:43,118 --> 01:17:44,953
I can't wait for
the site to go up.
1458
01:17:45,245 --> 01:17:47,914
Wow! Thank you.
That really means a lot.
1459
01:17:48,248 --> 01:17:50,250
She's my little idea factory.
(LAUGHS)
1460
01:17:50,458 --> 01:17:52,419
Maybe you should ask her
about ServiceCircuit.
1461
01:17:52,544 --> 01:17:53,753
Is that still
circling the drain?
1462
01:17:54,087 --> 01:17:58,091
More like the toilet. But the potential's
there-- we could make it work.
1463
01:17:58,300 --> 01:17:59,467
How much?
1464
01:18:00,427 --> 01:18:01,469
Two million.
1465
01:18:03,597 --> 01:18:04,764
We'll talk about it.
1466
01:18:04,973 --> 01:18:07,434
But if two million doesn't
work, we shut it down.
1467
01:18:07,642 --> 01:18:08,894
Thanks. I appreciate it.
1468
01:18:09,102 --> 01:18:12,439
You made us a ton of money this year.
Nobody bats a thousand.
1469
01:18:12,606 --> 01:18:13,607
True.
1470
01:18:13,815 --> 01:18:16,109
On that happy note,
who needs a drink?
1471
01:18:16,318 --> 01:18:17,485
I do.
1472
01:18:18,945 --> 01:18:20,030
You want another?
1473
01:18:20,155 --> 01:18:21,281
Sure.
1474
01:18:22,616 --> 01:18:24,117
See you in a bit.
1475
01:18:26,912 --> 01:18:28,955
She's lovely.
She is.
1476
01:18:29,289 --> 01:18:30,373
Is it serious?
1477
01:18:30,498 --> 01:18:31,625
Uh, no.
1478
01:18:32,334 --> 01:18:34,711
Well, I was sorry to hear
about you and Julie.
1479
01:18:34,794 --> 01:18:35,921
Me, too.
1480
01:18:36,254 --> 01:18:39,007
But the lawyers say
it's all very amicable.
1481
01:18:39,299 --> 01:18:41,134
So fake it
until you make it.
1482
01:18:41,426 --> 01:18:42,469
Something like that.
1483
01:18:42,677 --> 01:18:43,678
MARK: Katie!
1484
01:18:43,845 --> 01:18:45,305
(MOUTHING) Come on.
1485
01:18:47,057 --> 01:18:48,475
(GIGGLING)
1486
01:18:49,601 --> 01:18:51,770
Oh, this is beautiful!
1487
01:18:53,480 --> 01:18:55,148
Wow.
Mmm.
1488
01:18:58,109 --> 01:18:59,110
(SIGHS)
1489
01:18:59,819 --> 01:19:01,279
Whoa!
Nice.
1490
01:19:02,155 --> 01:19:03,740
(BOTH SIGH)
1491
01:19:04,324 --> 01:19:05,992
This is pretty.
1492
01:19:07,327 --> 01:19:08,954
Hmm.
Hmm.
1493
01:19:09,329 --> 01:19:11,456
Did you ever think
when we had that shitty
1494
01:19:11,581 --> 01:19:13,667
little apartment
on Charles Street...
1495
01:19:13,959 --> 01:19:15,293
...we'd end up here?
1496
01:19:15,502 --> 01:19:19,339
That wasn't a shitty apartment.
That was a great apartment.
1497
01:19:19,631 --> 01:19:22,133
Remember how tiny it was?
1498
01:19:22,342 --> 01:19:24,678
And we had the bathroom
in the kitchen?
1499
01:19:25,011 --> 01:19:27,973
And every time I flushed the
toilet, the shower got cold?
1500
01:19:28,181 --> 01:19:29,766
I hated it.
(CHUCKLES)
1501
01:19:31,017 --> 01:19:33,019
I loved that apartment.
1502
01:19:33,353 --> 01:19:37,190
It just seems like everything
was so simple then. You know?
1503
01:19:37,315 --> 01:19:38,316
Mmm-hmm.
1504
01:19:38,483 --> 01:19:40,193
I was happy-
1505
01:19:40,402 --> 01:19:41,444
And I just wanted
you to be happy.
1506
01:19:41,569 --> 01:19:42,570
I am.
1507
01:19:44,572 --> 01:19:45,907
Are you?
1508
01:19:47,242 --> 01:19:49,202
You can tell me.
I won't be mad.
1509
01:19:49,869 --> 01:19:53,039
I wouldn't even
be me without you.
1510
01:19:54,374 --> 01:19:56,543
I might not always
get it right, but...
1511
01:19:57,377 --> 01:20:00,547
...I'm exactly
where I want to be.
1512
01:20:02,549 --> 01:20:04,217
Do you promise?
1513
01:20:08,054 --> 01:20:10,223
I'm so glad you're here.
We have so much to tell you!
1514
01:20:10,348 --> 01:20:12,559
Major breakthroughs.
1515
01:20:12,892 --> 01:20:13,852
What is all this?
1516
01:20:13,935 --> 01:20:15,562
Amber got Mark's password
off the nanny cam.
1517
01:20:15,729 --> 01:20:16,896
Hacked into his
computer the night
1518
01:20:17,063 --> 01:20:18,189
she was supposed to
have sex with him.
1519
01:20:18,273 --> 01:20:19,566
You saw him?
1520
01:20:19,691 --> 01:20:20,942
He came over after work.
1521
01:20:21,443 --> 01:20:23,111
Did you have sex?
No!
1522
01:20:23,403 --> 01:20:26,740
I know I said I would, but you looked
so sad when I won, I couldn't.
1523
01:20:26,948 --> 01:20:29,617
I chickened out and
said I had Chlamydia!
1524
01:20:29,909 --> 01:20:32,746
That's right, bitch!
Chlamydia!
1525
01:20:32,954 --> 01:20:35,123
He can't have sex till
he finishes his Z-Pak!
1526
01:20:36,082 --> 01:20:38,460
CARLY: Mark's not just a cheating scumbag.
He's a thief.
1527
01:20:38,752 --> 01:20:41,921
Look what I found. This is a list
of all the start-up companies...
1528
01:20:42,255 --> 01:20:45,800
...Mark's invested in. Three are
offshore and one's a blind filing.
1529
01:20:46,092 --> 01:20:49,429
No board of directors,
a P.O. box for an address...
1530
01:20:49,763 --> 01:20:52,307
...and it's been operating at
a total loss in the Bahamas.
1531
01:20:52,390 --> 01:20:54,225
ServiceCircuit.
1532
01:20:54,309 --> 01:20:57,437
That's not right. I heard about
ServiceCircuit last night.
1533
01:20:57,562 --> 01:20:59,272
They're putting
more money into it.
1534
01:20:59,481 --> 01:21:00,857
That's part of the con.
1535
01:21:00,982 --> 01:21:02,317
We just need to find
the bank he's using.
1536
01:21:02,609 --> 01:21:03,860
KATE: I was with
the board last night.
1537
01:21:03,943 --> 01:21:06,863
They seem really happy.
Mark is making them rich!
1538
01:21:07,113 --> 01:21:10,658
He's stealing, Kate. Making money
for them is the way he does it.
1539
01:21:10,992 --> 01:21:12,452
Kate, what's going on?
1540
01:21:12,994 --> 01:21:16,998
Nothing. I just think it's more
complicated than we thought.
1541
01:21:18,792 --> 01:21:20,543
You slept with him.
1542
01:21:20,627 --> 01:21:23,088
One night, and you go
back to being a Stepford?
1543
01:21:23,171 --> 01:21:24,297
What am I supposed to do?
1544
01:21:24,506 --> 01:21:27,175
He must have literally
screwed your brains out!
1545
01:21:27,467 --> 01:21:30,970
Maybe you just have to forgive
people to move forward.
1546
01:21:31,179 --> 01:21:32,847
But he didn't ask for
forgiveness, did he?
1547
01:21:33,139 --> 01:21:35,809
If you had something to lose, you'd
understand how hard this is.
1548
01:21:36,017 --> 01:21:38,853
Like what, a cheating
husband of my own? Stop.
1549
01:21:39,145 --> 01:21:42,524
Things shifted this weekend. It
was different. You don't know.
1550
01:21:42,816 --> 01:21:43,983
Really?
1551
01:21:47,529 --> 01:21:49,948
What are you doing? Seeing
if Mark wants to hang out.
1552
01:21:50,323 --> 01:21:51,449
What's wrong with you?
1553
01:21:51,574 --> 01:21:52,659
KATE: Everything!
1554
01:21:52,951 --> 01:21:54,160
Everything is wrong with you.
1555
01:21:54,285 --> 01:21:57,664
And I feel like an idiot
for trusting you over him.
1556
01:21:57,997 --> 01:21:59,499
I am done!
1557
01:22:04,003 --> 01:22:05,004
Kate, wait.
1558
01:22:06,631 --> 01:22:08,007
(CELL PHONE CHIMES)
1559
01:22:13,847 --> 01:22:15,181
(HORN HONKING)
1560
01:22:47,672 --> 01:22:49,549
Nothing from Amber, either?
1561
01:22:49,883 --> 01:22:53,219
No. And I feel like if Amber
won't talk to me, then...
1562
01:22:53,720 --> 01:22:55,388
...obviously I
did something wrong.
1563
01:22:56,556 --> 01:22:58,183
I think you're
being hard on yourself.
1564
01:22:58,516 --> 01:23:00,018
I can't tell.
(CHUCKLES)
1565
01:23:01,394 --> 01:23:03,563
I care so much,
1566
01:23:03,688 --> 01:23:06,065
and then it just
comes out so harsh.
1567
01:23:06,357 --> 01:23:09,402
You know, what the hell do you know?
You get it wrong all the time.
1568
01:23:13,198 --> 01:23:14,532
Sorry.
1569
01:23:14,616 --> 01:23:16,576
I'm usually a fun date.
lam.
1570
01:23:16,868 --> 01:23:18,119
I'm having fun.
1571
01:23:18,244 --> 01:23:20,747
Not a lot of it, but some.
1572
01:23:22,874 --> 01:23:25,376
You should think
about being nicer to me...
1573
01:23:25,585 --> 01:23:28,087
...'cause I'm not certain
I really like you yet.
1574
01:23:28,922 --> 01:23:29,923
I think you like me.
1575
01:23:30,089 --> 01:23:31,090
Do I'.
1576
01:23:31,341 --> 01:23:32,592
(LAUGHS)
1577
01:23:41,100 --> 01:23:42,101
Hmm.
1578
01:23:42,685 --> 01:23:43,686
(COUGHING)
1579
01:23:43,770 --> 01:23:45,772
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
1580
01:23:45,855 --> 01:23:46,856
Oh!
1581
01:23:47,440 --> 01:23:49,776
Don't get too close to me.
I'm getting sick.
1582
01:23:50,068 --> 01:23:51,402
What's wrong?
1583
01:23:52,278 --> 01:23:54,614
I went to the doctor.
He gave me a Z-Pak.
1584
01:23:54,906 --> 01:23:58,618
He said something nasty's going
around, and you should take one, too.
1585
01:23:58,743 --> 01:23:59,786
That's for you.
1586
01:24:00,078 --> 01:24:01,788
A Z-Pak?
But I'm not sick.
1587
01:24:02,080 --> 01:24:06,084
That's why you take it beforehand.
It's prophylactic.
1588
01:24:14,926 --> 01:24:18,304
Oh, honey? I need you to
sign some papers for me.
1589
01:24:18,805 --> 01:24:22,934
If you could, do it today. No need to
read it-- it's just the usual stuff.
1590
01:24:23,142 --> 01:24:28,147
It's boring stuff from the accountant.
ServiceCircuit again.
1591
01:24:28,481 --> 01:24:32,151
Plus, I'm traveling to Miami
and the Bahamas.
1592
01:24:34,654 --> 01:24:37,448
Did you just say something
about the Bahamas?
1593
01:24:54,882 --> 01:24:56,217
(SNIFFLES) I'm sorry.
1594
01:24:56,509 --> 01:24:57,844
Oh, I feel so awful.
1595
01:24:58,052 --> 01:25:02,056
No, you were right about everything.
And he's still lying to me.
1596
01:25:02,348 --> 01:25:03,975
He's still treating
me like I'm blind.
1597
01:25:04,100 --> 01:25:05,727
You're not.
1598
01:25:07,812 --> 01:25:08,813
(SNIFFLES)
1599
01:25:08,896 --> 01:25:13,234
I found this-- wire transfer instructions
for a company in the Bahamas.
1600
01:25:13,526 --> 01:25:15,194
Mark is flying
down this week.
1601
01:25:15,403 --> 01:25:17,447
You said we just
had to find out where
1602
01:25:17,572 --> 01:25:19,574
he banks, so let's
go to the Bahamas...
1603
01:25:19,866 --> 01:25:21,534
...and let's get him!
1604
01:25:21,743 --> 01:25:25,913
Kate, I'm sorry,
but I can't.
1605
01:25:26,414 --> 01:25:28,708
I can't stay in this
Mark moment forever.
1606
01:25:29,042 --> 01:25:33,087
If I'm investigating him
or I go to the Bahamas...
1607
01:25:33,421 --> 01:25:35,423
...then I'm still involved,
and...
1608
01:25:37,091 --> 01:25:39,427
.“and i just
can't do that anymore.
1609
01:25:40,136 --> 01:25:41,471
I'm sorry.
1610
01:25:42,722 --> 01:25:45,725
No, okay.
I get it. Okay.
1611
01:25:47,226 --> 01:25:49,228
Okay. I just, um...
1612
01:25:49,771 --> 01:25:50,772
Hey.
Hmm?
1613
01:25:52,315 --> 01:25:53,316
Thank you.
1614
01:25:54,067 --> 01:25:55,068
For what?
1615
01:25:55,818 --> 01:25:59,155
For basically forcing
me to be your friend.
1616
01:25:59,822 --> 01:26:02,992
You wanted to be friends, too.
You just didn't know it.
1617
01:26:03,159 --> 01:26:04,661
Yeah, well...
1618
01:26:04,911 --> 01:26:06,496
You jumped out
a window for me.
1619
01:26:07,080 --> 01:26:08,289
You pushed me.
1620
01:26:08,414 --> 01:26:09,624
I shoved you.
1621
01:26:09,749 --> 01:26:11,584
(BOTH LAUGHING)
Hard, too.
1622
01:26:13,002 --> 01:26:15,171
Okay.
I'll keep you in the loop?
1623
01:26:16,089 --> 01:26:17,256
Okay.
1624
01:26:17,757 --> 01:26:18,925
Bye.
1625
01:26:21,594 --> 01:26:23,680
(SIGHS)
1626
01:26:29,977 --> 01:26:30,978
(SNIFFS)
1627
01:26:39,821 --> 01:26:41,656
I'll be damned.
1628
01:26:46,619 --> 01:26:48,037
(INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS)
1629
01:26:54,502 --> 01:26:56,879
AMBER AND CARLY: Kate!
Kate! (WHISTLES)
1630
01:27:01,300 --> 01:27:03,469
You guys came!
1631
01:27:05,596 --> 01:27:06,806
(LAUGHING)
1632
01:27:08,474 --> 01:27:11,144
You think we could
let a sister down?
1633
01:27:11,352 --> 01:27:13,688
We're getting
the band back together.
1634
01:27:14,355 --> 01:27:15,857
(EARLY:
Those bank transfers...
1635
01:27:16,190 --> 01:27:19,986
...were for ServiceCircuit. Guess
whose signature is all over them?
1636
01:27:20,153 --> 01:27:21,154
KATE". Mark's.
1637
01:27:21,237 --> 01:27:22,905
No! Yours! You're the CEO.
1638
01:27:23,156 --> 01:27:24,782
He used you to
create the company
1639
01:27:24,907 --> 01:27:26,534
and put everything
in your name.
1640
01:27:26,868 --> 01:27:28,703
He's neck-deep in
fraud and if anything
1641
01:27:28,828 --> 01:27:30,663
goes down, they'll
come after you first!
1642
01:27:30,747 --> 01:27:32,123
You're his fall guy!
1643
01:27:32,206 --> 01:27:33,833
You could go to jail!
1644
01:27:33,958 --> 01:27:35,543
I can't go to jail!
No,no,no.
1645
01:27:35,877 --> 01:27:37,170
Turn the car around!
1646
01:27:37,295 --> 01:27:38,546
No one's going to jail.
1647
01:27:38,838 --> 01:27:40,006
I am not Martha Stewart!
1648
01:27:40,089 --> 01:27:43,217
I will wind up in gen pop.
Turn around.
1649
01:27:43,551 --> 01:27:46,888
I can't join a gang! I don't
know how to make shanks!
1650
01:27:47,221 --> 01:27:50,767
I have soft hands and a small mouth.
I will be the bottom!
1651
01:27:51,017 --> 01:27:52,351
Where are you going?
1652
01:27:52,602 --> 01:27:53,603
I don't want to
make license plates!
1653
01:27:53,728 --> 01:27:54,771
CARLY: You won't go to jail.
1654
01:27:55,021 --> 01:27:56,355
Turn the car around!
1655
01:27:56,606 --> 01:27:59,275
Go back! Go back!
1656
01:27:59,776 --> 01:28:01,360
My name's all over everything!
1657
01:28:01,611 --> 01:28:05,698
That's the good news!
Your name's on everything.
1658
01:28:05,948 --> 01:28:09,285
What are you talking about?
Do you know what she means?
1659
01:28:09,535 --> 01:28:11,788
CARLY: We need to find
Mark and his bank.
1660
01:28:12,038 --> 01:28:13,790
KATE: I know Mark is at
the One and Only.
1661
01:28:13,873 --> 01:28:15,750
CARLY: Perfect,
we're halfway there!
1662
01:28:32,058 --> 01:28:33,059
You see him?
1663
01:28:33,392 --> 01:28:34,393
Not yet.
1664
01:28:34,602 --> 01:28:36,020
How do you know he's here?
1665
01:28:36,145 --> 01:28:37,563
GPS does not lie.
1666
01:28:37,730 --> 01:28:39,065
AMBER:
I think I see a dolphin!
1667
01:28:39,232 --> 01:28:40,942
I got him! I got him!
1668
01:28:51,744 --> 01:28:54,080
Right there.
Twelve o'clock.
1669
01:28:55,289 --> 01:28:58,084
CARLY: Okay, what are we looking for?
What's the clue?
1670
01:28:59,752 --> 01:29:00,920
KATE: How about that clue?
1671
01:29:01,128 --> 01:29:03,130
AMBER: He's taken this
shit international!
1672
01:29:03,422 --> 01:29:05,925
KATE: Oh, come on.
1673
01:29:06,259 --> 01:29:10,096
Every time I look through binoculars,
he has another mistress.
1674
01:29:10,304 --> 01:29:11,806
You think he has
more than one here?
1675
01:29:12,098 --> 01:29:15,101
CARLY: Who cares? Where else has he
traveled? Please don't tell me Thailand.
1676
01:29:15,601 --> 01:29:18,855
KATE: Why can't he stuff it into
a tube sock like a normal guy?
1677
01:29:19,021 --> 01:29:20,606
I have so many
lotions at the house.
1678
01:29:47,884 --> 01:29:49,093
(CAR DOOR CLOSES)
1679
01:29:53,890 --> 01:29:55,641
KATE: Oh, there it is--
the end of the road.
1680
01:29:57,143 --> 01:29:59,103
Well, if we don't
leave until tomorrow,
1681
01:29:59,186 --> 01:30:02,148
I say it's our turn to take
this shit international.
1682
01:30:03,816 --> 01:30:06,068
(PLAYING CALYPSO MUSIC)
1683
01:30:22,835 --> 01:30:24,128
(CROWD CHEERING)
1684
01:30:24,211 --> 01:30:25,713
(WHOOPING)
1685
01:30:28,007 --> 01:30:30,217
(CHEERING)
1686
01:30:31,177 --> 01:30:32,511
That was so much fun!
1687
01:30:32,637 --> 01:30:34,013
So much fun!
1688
01:30:34,347 --> 01:30:36,515
Can we get three punches,
please?
1689
01:30:36,849 --> 01:30:38,184
Three punches.
1690
01:30:39,435 --> 01:30:40,436
(SIGHS)
1691
01:30:41,687 --> 01:30:42,855
Come join me.
1692
01:30:43,189 --> 01:30:44,857
(LAUGHS) Me?
Yeah, you.
1693
01:30:45,066 --> 01:30:46,400
Come join me.
1694
01:30:46,692 --> 01:30:49,528
What? No. (LAUGHING)
(MOUTHING) Go.
1695
01:30:54,367 --> 01:30:56,369
Who you sending the selfie to?
1696
01:30:57,870 --> 01:30:59,747
I just started seeing someone.
1697
01:30:59,872 --> 01:31:01,791
Mmm. Yeah?
1698
01:31:02,041 --> 01:31:05,711
It's completely crazy, and I
don't know where it's going...
1699
01:31:05,920 --> 01:31:08,047
...but we just
have that twinkle.
1700
01:31:10,883 --> 01:31:12,051
Right.
1701
01:31:14,387 --> 01:31:15,721
I do know.
1702
01:31:16,097 --> 01:31:17,723
(CHUCKLES) You know what?
1703
01:31:18,557 --> 01:31:21,727
The best thing to do is just
not think about it too hard.
1704
01:31:22,561 --> 01:31:26,232
As long as it works,
it doesn't really matter why.
1705
01:31:28,359 --> 01:31:29,360
KATE: Hey!
1706
01:31:30,736 --> 01:31:32,822
(LAUGHING)
1707
01:31:32,989 --> 01:31:34,907
(MUMBLING)
1708
01:31:35,241 --> 01:31:37,284
Oh, God.
(BOTH LAUGHING)
1709
01:31:37,368 --> 01:31:39,412
(LAUGHING)
1710
01:31:39,495 --> 01:31:40,496
(SCREAMS)
1711
01:31:46,752 --> 01:31:47,753
(SIGHS)
1712
01:34:20,906 --> 01:34:21,907
(SIGHS)
1713
01:35:35,981 --> 01:35:37,733
Hi, can I help you?
I can help you!
1714
01:35:38,317 --> 01:35:39,318
(CHUCKLES)
1715
01:35:39,735 --> 01:35:41,237
Mark King
to see Miss Whitten.
1716
01:35:41,487 --> 01:35:43,322
LYDIA: Mark? Hi.
1717
01:35:43,989 --> 01:35:45,991
Are you the famous Mark?
1718
01:35:46,325 --> 01:35:47,451
I must be. You are...?
1719
01:35:47,576 --> 01:35:48,661
Lydia.
1720
01:35:49,328 --> 01:35:51,997
I get it.
Things are coming into focus.
1721
01:35:52,498 --> 01:35:53,666
Good things, I hope.
1722
01:35:53,832 --> 01:35:55,000
Yeah, of course.
1723
01:35:55,251 --> 01:35:58,003
Miss Whitten asked if you would
wait in the conference room.
1724
01:35:58,504 --> 01:36:00,256
Ah...
Right this way.
1725
01:36:00,339 --> 01:36:01,340
(CHUCKLES)
1726
01:36:16,230 --> 01:36:17,231
Ugh.
1727
01:36:21,860 --> 01:36:22,861
Hi, Mark.
1728
01:36:22,945 --> 01:36:23,946
(GROANS)
1729
01:36:25,197 --> 01:36:26,365
AMBER: Hi, Mark.
1730
01:36:26,865 --> 01:36:28,534
Oh, boy.
1731
01:36:30,244 --> 01:36:31,870
This is awkward.
1732
01:36:33,289 --> 01:36:34,707
I want a divorce, Mark.
No.
1733
01:36:36,709 --> 01:36:38,043
Don't do this.
I love you.
1734
01:36:38,210 --> 01:36:39,211
It's too late for that.
1735
01:36:39,545 --> 01:36:41,130
Please don't do this.
1736
01:36:41,380 --> 01:36:45,217
Have I made mistakes?
Yes. Big ones. Huge ones.
1737
01:36:45,551 --> 01:36:48,470
KATE: Okay, but when you sleep
with that many people...
1738
01:36:48,721 --> 01:36:51,140
...it's not a mistake, honey.
It's pathological.
1739
01:36:51,390 --> 01:36:53,726
It is.
But we can work it out.
1740
01:36:54,393 --> 01:36:56,145
I can change.
You can help me.
1741
01:36:56,562 --> 01:36:57,980
How many were there?
1742
01:36:58,230 --> 01:37:01,233
Affairs?
You're looking at it.
1743
01:37:04,236 --> 01:37:08,574
Okay, one more. A couple, maybe.
Uh...three.
1744
01:37:09,366 --> 01:37:11,327
(SIGHS) Five, maybe...
1745
01:37:11,493 --> 01:37:12,786
(STAMMERING)
What do you want me to say?
1746
01:37:12,870 --> 01:37:14,413
I get more ass
than a toilet seat!
1747
01:37:14,913 --> 01:37:17,249
I'm insecure.
l have issues.
1748
01:37:17,583 --> 01:37:19,710
It's not like I cared
about any of them.
1749
01:37:19,835 --> 01:37:21,628
They were all flings,
and they knew it.
1750
01:37:21,754 --> 01:37:24,923
(CLEARS THROAT) Except for Carly.
We were exclusive.
1751
01:37:25,174 --> 01:37:28,427
You told me you'd get a divorce
and we'd move to Tuscany.
1752
01:37:28,677 --> 01:37:31,597
I did say that, but nothing
I ever told you was true.
1753
01:37:31,847 --> 01:37:33,807
Mark, you're a real
piece of shit.
1754
01:37:34,099 --> 01:37:35,059
ALL: Yeah.
1755
01:37:35,142 --> 01:37:39,146
And no matter how many women you
sleep with, or cars you buy...
1756
01:37:39,438 --> 01:37:43,150
...nothing will be enough to
fill the hole inside you...
1757
01:37:43,442 --> 01:37:45,361
...where
something real should be.
1758
01:37:45,444 --> 01:37:48,238
You are an empty man.
KATE: Mmm-hmm.
1759
01:37:48,322 --> 01:37:50,324
CARLY: If you weren't as
disgusting as you were...
1760
01:37:50,657 --> 01:37:52,951
...I would have never known
that I needed to change.
1761
01:37:53,035 --> 01:37:54,953
Mmm-hmm.
I realized that with you.
1762
01:37:55,162 --> 01:37:58,499
You're so much better now.
Thank you.
1763
01:37:58,832 --> 01:38:01,001
CARLY: Anyway,
speaking of changes...
1764
01:38:03,170 --> 01:38:04,296
What is this?
1765
01:38:04,505 --> 01:38:05,839
CARLY: Divorce papers.
1766
01:38:06,465 --> 01:38:08,801
We valued everything
you own, and...
1767
01:38:09,009 --> 01:38:12,137
...that number at the bottom
is your joint net worth.
1768
01:38:14,014 --> 01:38:15,974
You girls think
you can shake me down
1769
01:38:16,100 --> 01:38:18,018
for all my money,
you're crazy.
1770
01:38:18,310 --> 01:38:21,522
Not all. Just half. That's
what equal partners get--50%.
1771
01:38:21,980 --> 01:38:24,900
AMBER: Though we did have to
significantly reduce your share.
1772
01:38:27,986 --> 01:38:29,446
(MARK STUTTERING)
1773
01:38:29,655 --> 01:38:32,991
What is this?
Why does it say zero?
1774
01:38:33,200 --> 01:38:34,660
The money you stole
from ServiceCircuit?
1775
01:38:34,785 --> 01:38:36,203
I don't know
anything about that.
1776
01:38:36,495 --> 01:38:38,664
KATE: That's funny, neither did I.
But apparently...
1777
01:38:38,872 --> 01:38:42,543
...I'm the CEO. I'm the CEO of
several companies, actually.
1778
01:38:42,876 --> 01:38:45,003
But sadly, I had to
empty those accounts.
1779
01:38:45,212 --> 01:38:47,714
(STAMMERING) Empty? What are
you talking about? How...?
1780
01:38:48,048 --> 01:38:49,675
CARLY: We looked.
1781
01:38:49,758 --> 01:38:51,510
That's what happens
when you piss people off.
1782
01:38:51,844 --> 01:38:56,056
What? You robbed me.
You three girls robbed me.
1783
01:38:56,348 --> 01:38:58,183
No way! I don't buy it.
1784
01:38:58,392 --> 01:39:01,061
You don't have it
in you to rip me off.
1785
01:39:01,353 --> 01:39:02,896
You sure about that?
Yes!
1786
01:39:03,188 --> 01:39:07,693
Didn't you notice our skin?
That nice Bahamian glow?
1787
01:39:08,527 --> 01:39:10,571
Incredible.
He didn't even notice!
1788
01:39:10,863 --> 01:39:12,197
MARK: Honestly, Katie...
1789
01:39:12,406 --> 01:39:14,533
...I don't know
what's going on with you,
1790
01:39:14,658 --> 01:39:16,743
but for your sake,
I hope you're lying.
1791
01:39:17,035 --> 01:39:19,538
It's your signature
all over those contracts.
1792
01:39:19,746 --> 01:39:22,416
It's you who's liable.
So don't threaten me, honey.
1793
01:39:22,749 --> 01:39:24,626
Because if you did
empty those accounts,
1794
01:39:24,751 --> 01:39:26,587
you're the one
going down, not me.
1795
01:39:26,879 --> 01:39:29,923
We thought you might say that.
Then Carly explained...
1796
01:39:30,215 --> 01:39:32,217
...a concept
called restitution.
1797
01:39:32,426 --> 01:39:34,928
Or payback. That's how
we framed it with Nick.
1798
01:39:35,429 --> 01:39:37,097
(INTERCOM BEEPING) You
framed it with Nick, now?
1799
01:39:37,431 --> 01:39:40,434
You included Nick?
Bullshit! Now I know you're--
1800
01:39:40,767 --> 01:39:44,438
Hey, Nick!
Hey, man! I... What?
1801
01:39:46,607 --> 01:39:48,609
I don't know
what they told you.
1802
01:39:48,942 --> 01:39:51,278
They're having some kind
of group breakdown.
1803
01:39:51,570 --> 01:39:53,780
They didn't tell me anything.
They showed me.
1804
01:39:54,281 --> 01:39:57,951
It's over. I'm getting my ideas
direct from the factory now.
1805
01:39:58,285 --> 01:40:02,789
What? From her?! Is this some kind of joke?
You're firing me?
1806
01:40:03,081 --> 01:40:06,793
Firing you is the least of it. The only
reason you're not going to prison...
1807
01:40:07,085 --> 01:40:09,129
...is because your wife
repaid all the money.
1808
01:40:09,463 --> 01:40:12,299
Oh, no, no, no.
You're all lying.
1809
01:40:12,633 --> 01:40:16,970
It's bullshit. it's bullshit!
Global bullshit! I call bullshit!
1810
01:40:17,262 --> 01:40:18,597
Bullshit! ! !!
1811
01:40:18,805 --> 01:40:20,641
My wife's not some
criminal mastermind.
1812
01:40:20,933 --> 01:40:24,770
She needs freakin' brain camp!
That's my money!!!
1813
01:40:25,187 --> 01:40:26,188
(GRUNTS)
1814
01:40:26,939 --> 01:40:28,148
(CHOKING)
1815
01:40:28,398 --> 01:40:29,900
(GROANING)
1816
01:40:33,153 --> 01:40:36,323
Mark, you're not
a very nice person.
1817
01:40:36,657 --> 01:40:37,991
Shut up!!
1818
01:40:40,035 --> 01:40:41,036
(BREATHING HEAVILY)
1819
01:40:42,120 --> 01:40:43,664
Get away. Get away, get away!
(SCREAMS)
1820
01:40:45,290 --> 01:40:46,458
That can't be right.
It's a trick!
1821
01:40:46,542 --> 01:40:47,709
(KEYBOARD CLACKING)
1822
01:40:48,293 --> 01:40:49,294
No!
1823
01:40:51,004 --> 01:40:54,341
No,no,no,no!
1824
01:40:54,675 --> 01:40:56,301
That's my money!
1825
01:40:59,137 --> 01:41:00,806
You won't get
away with this.
1826
01:41:01,014 --> 01:41:02,808
You won't get
away with this!!!!
1827
01:41:08,063 --> 01:41:09,064
(GROANS)
1828
01:41:17,573 --> 01:41:18,907
(GROWLING)
1829
01:41:22,619 --> 01:41:23,620
(EXHALES)
1830
01:41:28,542 --> 01:41:30,168
Excuse me.
1831
01:41:30,377 --> 01:41:31,920
(GLASS CRUNCHING)
1832
01:41:42,180 --> 01:41:44,141
Oh, oh, oh! Hey! Hey!
1833
01:41:44,224 --> 01:41:46,059
Hey,buddy!
I'm here! Stop!
1834
01:41:46,351 --> 01:41:47,686
It's already hooked.
1835
01:41:47,894 --> 01:41:49,229
It's barely in the red!
1836
01:41:49,354 --> 01:41:50,689
It's already
in the air, guy.
1837
01:41:51,356 --> 01:41:53,025
That's a $300,000 car,
asshole!
1838
01:41:53,233 --> 01:41:54,693
You can afford it, then.
1839
01:41:55,902 --> 01:41:57,070
Welcome to New York.
1840
01:41:57,362 --> 01:41:59,197
You get back here!
1841
01:42:00,907 --> 01:42:03,577
See?! This! This!
1842
01:42:03,910 --> 01:42:06,079
You mother--
(HORN HONKING)
1843
01:42:08,957 --> 01:42:10,375
(SCREAMING)
1844
01:42:12,044 --> 01:42:15,589
Huh, could this day
get any worse? Really?!!
1845
01:42:16,465 --> 01:42:17,549
What?
1846
01:42:21,887 --> 01:42:23,889
Next time,
call a plumber.
1847
01:42:29,728 --> 01:42:31,563
There she is!
1848
01:42:38,236 --> 01:42:39,279
What a cute dress!
1849
01:42:39,404 --> 01:42:40,447
Thank you!
1850
01:42:40,614 --> 01:42:41,615
(SIGHS)
1851
01:42:42,074 --> 01:42:43,241
Hi.
1852
01:42:43,450 --> 01:42:44,951
CARLY: Can I make a toast?
1853
01:42:46,286 --> 01:42:48,288
Here's to having friends...
1854
01:42:49,289 --> 01:42:52,250
...friends that
love every part of you.
1855
01:42:52,459 --> 01:42:53,877
And though it
brought us together,
1856
01:42:54,002 --> 01:42:55,420
let's never sleep
with the same guy again.
1857
01:42:55,629 --> 01:42:57,255
CARLY: Good idea. Never Even
1858
01:42:57,923 --> 01:42:59,257
Cheers.
132406
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