Original subtitles

In the final years of the Ming dynasty,

disorder was rife and the eunuchs held great power.

Crane of eastern depot was the wickest of them all.

Meanwhile, the Bruneian empire, a diplomatic ally,

gifted a black furred beast to the emperor.

However, crane took possession of the monster with sinister intentions in mind.

Silence!

Chain his majesty's beast.

It hurts...

Ocean.

This toy is ferocious by nature.

It'll become a killer with a little training.

It needs to fear you

so that it'll obey you.

As the animal tamer of the imperial spy,

I've seen beasts of all kinds.

But this little monster is adorable by nature.

My conscience won't let me turn it into a weapon.

Get my monster back!

And bring ocean back, too!

Whoever gets the black monster alive

shall receive 30,000 taels of silver!

This sent the martial world into a hunting frenzy.

"Look to the heavens. The higher it is,"

"the smaller the people seem."

"The learned priest"

"for fame and power, we restrain ourselves in borders."

"We've lost too much and gained too little."

"The Seductive Swordswoman"

"it's easy to speak of love and loyalty."

"The Woody monk"

"it's important to have actions to back up those words."

"Goodness and villainy are hard to foresee in both human and beasts."

"The flirtatious nun"

"a split second is all it takes for evil to overcome."

"Just have a drink"

"lord of the beggars"

"and enjoy life."

We've been fighting endlessly over this monster.

Why don't we talk it out?

You said the same thing yesterday,

then you stabbed me in the back!

We agreed to split up into turfs,

then you stepped into mine!

That's enough. Why hurt each other?

You're the one that killed my deputy,

now you want to be a pacifist, you old spinster?

What? I'm still young.

Besides, he deserved to die for being a lecher!

If lechers deserve to die,

then what about you and the monk?

How dare you steal the nun from me, Baldie!

I'd always known that you're a slut!

You said yesterday that you're in love with me.

So what?!

You want a beggar? Don't you have any taste?

What about you?! I thought you loved only me.

What's with you and pinky?

Outta my way, all of you!

You jackasses!

Stay back or I'll unleash hell! I'll stab yal!

You're going to be in a world of pain. I'll stab ya!

Stop chasing me, damn you!

Stay back!

Boss, why aren't we in the fight?

They're fighting for real, man.

What are you eating? A bun.

Where's mine?

I forgot to save one for you.

Forget it, then.

You prick!

This is dangerous. Why don't we just leave?

We're the south Sichuan bandits.

If we just up and leave...

It'll be embarrassing.

It is if everyone sees us leave.

It won't be if we leave quietly.

You're right.

Why are you still after me?!

Help!

Why are you chasing me?! Help!

I'm getting dizzy!

We're all dead if we don't back off.

Then back off. Forget this. Let go of my foot.

Why can't you all back down first?!

Look, we'll all back down on the count of three.

Fine.

One, two, three.

You despicable jerks...

Boss, he has a bun!

Where?

This is mine for sure.

Don't steal from the dead. Give that back.

I want to eat it.

You're still alive?!

I didn't say that.

What the hell was that?!

He jinxed himself to death, boss.

Sorry, man, you can have the bun back.

Have it on the road to the afterlife.

Bless you.

Sorry, man, I'll leave you half.

Put that down.

Saucy!

It's a monster!

I'm sure I'm better looking than that.

It's like a lion with its mouth open.

Beware of thieves in the night!

Stop hollering.

I hear the flying thief showed up here last month.

The killer of all the watchmen is at large.

Aren't you scared?

Of what?

We're watchmen upholding justice.

Lightning doesn't strike in the same place twice, right?

True.

Was that lightning?

Maybe.

Did you hear that noise behind us?

Should we keep hollering?

No way. Just keep moving.

Move along quietly.

I see nothing in the dead of night.

Then why are you hollering?

This family is supposed to be wealthy. What's all this?

I like this.

This is nice.

This is huge! What do you need that for?

I want this!

Who is it?

Someone from your destiny.

What destiny?

Who do you think you are?

You trying to Rob the robbers?

Catch up, Bella.

I'm afraid of heights, blade.

I should stick to the ground.

You managed to keep up with me. Not bad.

You screwed up our payday.

What kind of pay do you expect from a place like this?

I have a real heist for you, if you two are interested.

What kind of heist?

Don't listen to her, blade.

30,000 taels of silver. How's that sound?

Sounds great.

See you tomorrow at Huatian courier station after sundown.

These are the code words.

See you there. My name is blade.

That's Bella, a fellow disciple.

We lead the Sichuan-Shaanxi chapter of the Guiyi army.

Wait, miss, what's your name?

Frigid.

Frigid?

There's definitely something fishy about her.

Look at that white get-up, pretending to be pure.

Aren't you afraid that she's a swindler?

The army is in danger. We have to take the risk.

Shut your traps, you damn mutts!

You lookin' for a beating?!

I'll smash you with my stinkpot!

The smoky place up ahead is Zhu village.

A wild fire wiped it out a few days ago.

The smoke still hasn't dissipated yet.

We can ward off natural disasters, but not man-made ones.

You know what to do if you see a troublemaker.

Execution on the spot.

My lord,

the monster hunters we recruited have been wiped out.

Why are you laughing, my lord?

These so-called martial artists fight day and night.

They're a potential danger to the throne.

I used this so-called monster hunt to lure them out

and let them slaughter one another over money.

I didn't even have to lift a finger.

Now do you know why I'm laughing?

That's brilliant, my lord!

Brilliant, indeed, my lord!

My lord has such a perceptive mind.

My lord's powers are almost godly.

My lord...

That's enough flattery from you.

Though it feels good to be flattered...

Constable Wang from west Sichuan has a message.

He says that he's captured ocean.

They'll spend a night at Huatian on the way to Jianzhou.

How far away is Huatian from here?

About 25 kilometers, my lord.

But the mountainous path is quite rugged. I suggest...

I don't want to risk anything. We're going to Huatian now.

Yes, my lord!

We're off!

Boss, I'm hungry again.

Hey!

You've eaten everything. I'm the starving one here!

I'm hungry coz I've eaten. You don't starve if you don't eat.

You haven't eaten a thing, and you're fine.

You're ridiculous.

Why don't we beg for some food?

We're proper martial artists. You expect me to beg for food?

Are you shameless or what?

Wait... Here, take this.

Keep your filthy hands off me.

Don't fight. I've got nothing.

I'm a civilized man. Don't provoke me.

Your fleas are hopping over. Here, have some.

I'll beat the next person that touches me!

Go over there. Don't fight.

What's wrong?!

Please give me some food. I'm starving!

Don't bite! Give it to him!

Let me see if I have more. Hurry, Bella.

This is my last piece of bread. Take it.

Let's go. I'm all out.

Thank you, sir. Thank you, miss.

You really will do anything for food, boss.

Shut up! I had to beg because of you.

Can you smell that, boss?

What's wrong? Is it poisoned?

There's meat.

I don't see any.

That guy has meat on him.

They definitely have meat.

Just a crummy piece of bread? That's insulting, boss.

It's so windy here.

Watch out for traps.

Women are better at talking. Go on.

Me again?

Who are you?!

It's just an old man.

Who knows when the lovers will reunite.

In this very moment...

Sorrow is what I feel.

Brother.

Old man.

Jeez, I feel sorrow looking at you two.

It's just a secret code. You don't have to be so into it.

Don't move. This is a robbery!

Give me the meat from your pack!

Don't move!

Aren't you the guy that bit me?

That was me. So what?

How dare you give me bread when you have meat?!

Guys, unless you have pressing matters,

I suggest you leave before you get in trouble.

You little pissant...

1... Boss.

Boss!

Fine.

I'll show you what getting in trouble is.

Go, saucy!

Go, old man!

Mr. mount, this is blade,

the leader of the Sichuan-Shaanxi Guiyi army.

Behind him is his fellow warrior, Bella.

This is Mr. mount, known for his lethal triple moves.

Who are these two weirdos?

I'm dash, leader of the south Sichuan bandits.

I'm second-in-command. Don't mess with me!

Cut the crap.

We should eliminate these thieves once and for all!

Stop!

They should join us.

The more people, the better.

Soon, constable Wang and his men

will pass by this place. That's when we'll ambush them

and steal the 30,000 taels of silver. Any comment?

You're gorgeous. Boss,

isn't stealing imperial silver punishable by death?

We can't lose our heads!

If you back out now, you die anyway.

Looks like we're in, boss. Miss frigid,

I'm not being petty,

but we're here to raise money for the Guiyi army.

The fewer silver we get, the less help the army gets.

This silver can make or break the army.

How do I know you're really giving it to the army?

Why, you... He's right.

Anyone would come up with some grand tale for the silver.

I won't let you insult the great leader of our army!

Don't force my hand. And you!

Insult each other all you want. I just want 30% of the loot.

If that old man can take 30%,

then each of us deserves at least 10%!

Already splitting the loot before we know how to steal it.

What's wrong with that?

You're all talk. Tell us how you plan to steal the silver!

Get the meat, Bella.

I told you she has meat in that pack, boss.

The meat is spiked. You feel like getting drugged?

We should probably leave that to someone who needs sleep.

I think you could use some sleep. Try it.

We can't just take the silver by force.

As long as we can get this meat into the soldiers' mouths,

then the silver is as good as ours.

A heist plan straight from water margins.

Slut!

Aren't I clever, Bella?

But how can you be sure that they'll eat the meat?

If there are many of them, how do we split it?

What if there are vegetarians among them?

What if they're not hungry?

How dare you question blade?!

He did it.

This one. Over there.

She did it.

He did it.

She did it.

He did it. This one.

I'm out of breath.

I'm the great monk's reincarnation. Just passing through.

Passing through? More like falling!

Get him, saucy!

Wait!

No, look...

It's an imperial decree plaque, frigid.

No, I mean...

I picked it... A member of the imperial police.

You're a lap dog for eastern depot!

No, I just picked it up.

They seem like formidable foes.

I don't stand a chance against them in a fight.

She's so gorgeous.

She must be the leader.

These two are about the same age and move together.

They must be from the same clan.

With an abacus in his hand, he must be greedy.

I can get rid of him if I offer him some perks.

Worn out clothes and sinister faces.

These hoodlums aren't worth my time.

No one's touching that piece of meat.

It must be spiked.

This ragtag gang must be up to something.

What is it?

What are they up to?

If I'm not mistaken, you guys are planning to pull off...

That heist from water margins?

How did you know that?

Just a guess.

Looks like you're too smart for your own good.

Look, I'll tell you the truth.

I'm in charge of hygiene at an official's residence nearby.

Simply put, I'm a janitor.

Three months ago, I picked up that plaque on the street.

How do you pick up an imperial police plaque?!

You'll just have to take my word for it.

Besides,

I fell from the sky.

Maybe the gods sent me here to help you.

How can you help us?

I know this area better than anyone.

Tell us what you got.

Here we go.

Huatian was a rest stop between Hanzhong and Jianzhou.

There's no one within 15 kilometers in any direction.

Soldiers get exhausted transporting goods on this road,

so they always stop here for a break.

That's why this is the perfect spot for an ambush.

However, the station's been out of commission for a while.

6 people with weapons hanging out at an abandoned shack,

even a blind man can tell you're up to no good.

So your plan isn't going to work.

How do we put them at ease then?

It's easy. Clean the place up and turn it into an inn.

Hold a grand re-opening.

Do we have enough time?

That's what we need to make good use of.

Time!

Ready... action!

The soldiers must be rushing to move their cargo.

I'll place a Boulder on a narrow part of the path.

When the soldiers see it blocking their way,

they'll have no choice but to stop.

I couldn't find a horse.

The soldiers will do everything they can to clear the path.

You need a diet, boss.

Shut up!

Meanwhile,

we'll work together to spruce up the inn. Don't look, it's filthy!

Make it pretty and inviting to our esteemed guests.

There's no hair there.

Meanwhile, once the soldiers get the Boulder out of the way.

Go away, Boulder. Hurry.

That's right.

The imperial soldiers will kick the doors down

and see our polished, flawless establishment.

At their hungriest,

thirstiest hour,

we'll serve them the meat.

Come here, fatty.

I thought I'm the Boulder.

Now you're the leader.

This is the meat.

Hold your breath and take a bite.

Bro, how can you just leave me like this? Cover yourself.

The drug kicks in, the soldiers faint,

mission accomplished.

You're quite clever.

What's your name?

Are you interested in me, miss?

He's out of line!

What do you care?

My name is cypress.

I need some sleep.

I don't trust people who are too clever.

Especially those of dubious origins.

He's already told us his plan. No need to keep him around.

Hide him somewhere so he doesn't create trouble for us.

We need a rope for that first.

Let me use that cloth

around your waist. Don't touch me!

Stop moving.

I just need to loosen it. Don't touch me!

Let him borrow it, man.

Lift the legs. Bella,

get the clean-up started.

Stop!

Here they come!

Let me do it!

Dumping a Boulder in the middle of the road.

That's just plain rude.

Good work!

My goodness...

How powerful!

We're up, saucy. Go!

Who are you?

Bro, our family heirloom's been smashed!

That's right.

It's totally smashed! My illness will never be cured!

You're dying at such a young age, little bro!

You can have it back.

Now get out of the way!

Father! Mother!

You've been blown away by the wind! These idiots

are clearly swindlers.

Mother! Father!

Help!

There's another one of them?!

It was a tiger!

Who are you, ma'am? Please leave.

Your father's been eaten by a tiger!

Papa!

Pipe down!

Didn't you say these were your parents' ashes?

Now your father's been eaten by a tiger?

I'm their stepmother!

Mother!

I already got a new man, you fools.

You've been wronged, father!

The minute you're gone, she's already replacing you!

Don't take this road! There really is a tiger up ahead!

I think we failed.

I like fighting tigers!

Wash, wash, wash. Brush, brush, brush.

Stupid, dumb blade.

Running off instead of helping me...

I'm confused.

Why would the army be out here cleaning an old shack?

That stupid frigid must be a swindler.

Some Vixen pretending to be pure.

That damn fox!

I'm right here, Missy.

I'm not afraid of you, ugly Vixen.

So noisy...

Welcome!

After 9 months of extensive renovation,

we're finally re-opening our doors today.

And you're our very first customer, sir.

Tea cultivated at the top of Mengshan.

Don't worry, we use 100% genuine ingredients.

To ensure a good time for all our guests,

all our staff have gone through vigorous training.

This way, sir.

This is the renowned chef mount from capital.

He looks familiar...

Impossible! This way, please.

Good evening sir!

Is the water of suitable temperature?

What the hell is this?

Japanese-style milk foot bath.

A spot of health care, sir.

A spot of health care?

That's right, a teeny spot.

We're here to please all your senses.

You don't want to miss this!

You know exactly what I like, kid.

I like my women feral with a bit of meat.

You're looking slutty there, boss.

What do you know about belly dancing?!

Sir, please try our signature braised meat.

Wait.

Ask them to come down. I can pay.

Sure. You beasts...

Girls, come down for a drink with our guest.

Go on, saucy. Get down here and drink with our guest!

Come on down, babies.

It stinks in here! Is that underwear?!

Holy crap, look at those pigs.

Come on, baby.

Take it easy. Come here.

Have some meat, sir.

Wait.

I want you girls to feed me with your mouths.

Eat up!

Eat it.

Idiots.

Fine. You want mouth-to-mouth?

Here we go.

Saucy, your facial hair is showing.

Wait.

You're a special one. You even have facial hair.

Where the hell's my weapon?!

They screwed up. And it ain't my fault.

Whoops.

You clowns think you can swindle me?

We were just hoping to borrow something of yours.

Sure, but you have to get permission...

From him!

You're talking to...

You're talking to the white-browed...

White-browed...

Look, lady...

I know you want to fight, but let me finish my name...

Stop being rude!

Catch!

It's on fire!

Bella.

Who turned the lights out?

They're so damn rude!

Get them!

He's so obsessed with manners.

Here comes my abacus!

You've stomped my foot, saucy!

Take this!

Gotcha!

Please spare me!

Go to hell!

Take this.

I'll nail you bastards!

See ya!

I can't stay here.

See my blade!

Don't move!

Run away!

Time to go!

No sense in chasing him.

The silver's right here, saucy!

I'm not chasing him.

It's so heavy. We're rich!

Open the chest.

The silver's definitely in here.

It's coming!

The fight's already over, man.

When did he get out?

It's coming!

Who's coming? Get down and play dead!

What the hell?

Hide!

I'm talking to you!

Hide! What is this idiot doing?

What's going on here?

That sounds familiar.

What the hell is this thing?

What in the world is this?

It can't possibly be that thing again.

What the hell is that?!

The clouds are coming in!

Holy smokes!

Stop it. That hurts.

It's so cute.

Wait! Come back!

Careful, Bella.

Look at this thing, blade.

Such a cute puppy.

I think it's a monkey.

It's obviously a dog.

Where did it come from?

Are you a boy or a girl?

You like this?

Is this what you like?

Save me, blade! Bella, are you okay?

Asshole!

Don't scream.

What did you do to it?

It's hotter than me when it's big.

Back off!

Stay away from me!

Stop, or I'll fight back!

Why are you searching me?! You're too rough!

What the hell are you doing?

I don't know you.

Look, you damn furry thing,

my allergies are going crazy, I'm itchy all over

and you won't even answer me!

Step back, or I'll jump!

Hold that breath...

Hold that breath...

Don't be afraid, frigid.

I'll protect you!

Blade!

Put away your sword!

It gets agitated when it sees a weapon. Put it away!

Hurry! Put it away!

Put it away!

Don't eat me. I'm so bony and thin.

My meat looks smooth, but it tastes terrible.

Same with Bella. Neither of us is tasty.

Neither of us is tasty.

There's a fat one over there. Eat him.

You little weasel!

Good thing I'm trained in circus tricks.

He's gonna do what?!

That's a huge mouth.

You can do it, boss! Just a little harder.

Put your back into it!

Put your back into it!

Wait...

I can't believe that fits in his mouth.

I'm not hungry!

Wait, don't move. Stay there.

Crap!

What's going on?

Stay back,

or you're gonna get it.

This isn't mine!

Go!

Go over there!

I'm sorry!

Lucky!

Ocean hit me...

Go.

Go on!

Get out!

Ocean...

Who burnt you?

Lucky!

Lucky.

Ocean...

Frigid.

I've finally found you, ocean.

The fish and the goose are long gone.

I've always known that separation is painful.

Even a short reunion with my beloved...

Is worth giving up my time in the world.

"People fight for the vanity of glory."

"Like water, life moves in uncertain ways."

"To find the love of a lifetime,."

"I'm not afraid of treacherous paths."

"Knowing that the blade is heartless"

"makes this heart feel uneasy."

"We leave our grudges aside."

"Our reunions may be short-lived,"

"but this love in our hearts"

"will live on forever."

"The road ahead of us may stretch on."

"It may stretch on..."

"I'm not afraid of the blizzards ahead."

"There's always tenderness..."

"All that's left in life..."

Frigid, I'm using my power to get you out of here.

"I think back on our joys and sorrows."

"This love we share."

"I move forward with a proud smile at the sky,"

"despite all the vicissitudes of the past."

"I will no longer talk about the fleeting past.”

"The love in our hearts"

"can still live forever."

"I will no longer talk about the fleeting past.”

"This love can still live on forever."

Am I dreaming?

We'll never part again, ocean.

Blade. Frigid.

You're not fully recovered yet.

Who's this handicapped man?

I knew this woman was up to no good.

They're rekindled old flames.

This makes me sick.

Sick!

I'm sorry. There was no silver all along.

No silver?

I can stand losing a girl, but not losing money!

No way!

We've put our necks on the line by killing soldiers

so you can reunite with your boyfriend?!

You still have me, blade.

12 acupuncture points sealed by silver needles.

If you push them all out at once,

your body's inner balance will fall into chaos.

Must be a real master.

Look, the rogue imperial policeman!

Ocean!

Reward is 30,000 taels of silver!

You've got the wrong man.

They look equally ugly!

This is definitely him.

His clothes are a bit...

A bit dirty.

The hairstyle's wrong, too.

That's right. It's the hair.

Sir, if you don't mind...

If you're not him... Miss frigid, come here.

Then sit down and let us examine you.

Is it like this?

Well?

He looks nothing like that. Really?

What are you doing?

No way. Let me do it. Is it wrong?

I think it's right. That's more like it.

Let me do it.

That's your spit, man. Check this out.

Here we go.

See? Not really.

Why don't we just do it at the same time?

It looks about the same.

Finally!

A humdrum hairstyle. Just like that on the poster.

He's really worth 30,000 taels of silver.

I pegged you wrong. You're on our side after all.

What's happening? That hurt!

That almost blew me away!

Are you all right, frigid?

Get up.

Hey, old man, - go away.

I thought you said he's hurt. Why did you help her up

instead of me?! I meant that

his powers were erratic.

Who's on your side?!

I didn't say a thing. Mercy, sir!

If you touch him, you damn bum,

I'll kill you!

I saved you because I love you.

Did you save me because you love me...

Or because of the price on my head?

Again?

Stop it.

We get it already.

I can't stand this. Just stop.

Let her dance. It's nice.

You're an official's daughter.

But since you met me,

you've suffered too much.

If turning me in will get you 30,000 taels of silver...

Then do it. I won't resent you.

Ocean.

You're all I care about.

Do you think ocean's injuries will affect his fertility?

Possibly.

I'm just kidding.

Lucky was chasing you. Did you burn it?

It's all a misunderstanding, man. Listen...

Ocean.

You...

He's down again. Just chill for a bit.

What does lucky have to do with you?

Who the hell are you? Speak!

You don't need to point a sword at me.

Wait, I have to figure out where to start.

"I'm cypress and I'm the man"

"who's well known across the land."

"One fine day, I got the inspiration"

"to serve the public and help the nation."

"I aced it at the examination,"

"with no problem winning altercations."

"I topped my class, becoming an elite."

"And I was soon given the prison beat."

"One stormy night, someone stormed the prison."

"They killed my friends and left my heart broken."

"Disillusioned, I left my dreams behind."

"I reached Zhu village which settled my mind."

"The village was haunted by a monster,"

"and the villagers' prayers went unanswered."

"I'm too kind not to save them from trouble,"

"cypress will ne'er, ne'er, ne'er"

"burst their bubble."

"I thought things through and had a master plan."

"A fire would make the monster leave its den."

"Badly injured, the monster ran and ran."

"I saved the day and saved their clan!"

We defeated the monster!

"The villagers then called me a hero."

"I would strive to reduce crime to zero."

"All the way to zero."

That was a pretty great story, right?

Did the story make you guys fall in love with me?

You know the rest of the story.

Any questions?

The monster... is it the one on the wanted posters?

Let me see it.

Another 30,000 taels of silver for the monster.

I have an idea.

Why don't we team up to catch it? Make this worth our time.

We can make a total of 60,000 taels!

That's right.

But I can't beat him. Can you?

If we aren't powerful enough to capture this bounty,

what makes you think we can get the one out there?

Listen, we've been chasing this monster for weeks...

I thought we had just started yesterday, boss.

But because of a small momentary error,

the monster managed to escape our grip.

We weren't even close to it, boss.

Anyway, since we're such selfless folks,

we've decided to share the reward with all of you.

But, boss, we couldn't catch it in the first place.

Can you shut up?

If I help you catch the monster, can I get a cut?

You wish.

Well said! Welcome to the team.

Boss, if they join us, then we'll have...

One... two... three...

A lot of people!

Besides, with the south Sichuan bandits around,

there's no way the monster can hurt any of you.

Do you think we'll be able to catch it, blade?

It's pretty scary when it transforms.

I wasn't confident, but...

We've got a bait right here.

Feed the spiked meat to the bait,

then have the monster eat the bait.

It'll hurt, right, bait?

Then the monster

will be in our hands. Good idea.

You bastards.

You people still call yourself human?

I don't think I can do it, either.

It's just too cruel.

Great men make sacrifices. He's a slapdog.

I left a long time ago!

If we treat him with such cruelty,

how does that make us better than him?

She's right, you'll be no different!

If his death keeps our army going,

I won't hesitate a bit.

You people... you...

The monster!

Where?

Hey, stop right there!

Blade, get back here!

Now I see that a human life is worth nothing to you.

And that the end will justify any means.

I'm worth nothing to you, either.

That's right. The silver is all you care about, isn't it?

Bella!

What's she mad about?

Bella!

Lucky!

Lucky!

You need to hide. People are coming for you.

Jeez, this is scary.

Ahh, I ain't afraid of you!

Lucky.

Lucky.

Who gave you such a tacky name anyway?

Lucky, are you crying?

Who's there?

Lucky...

What's wrong?

What's wrong?

You're hurt.

Are you hurt?

You're hurt, right?

Are you in pain?

How about some medicine?

Bells.

Here's some medicine.

Sit down right now!

Sit!

Down, right now!

Be good.

You know, if I don't put medicine on that,

it'll never heal. And it'll get worse.

Then you'll die. Is that clear?

I'll be sad if you die, okay?

Do you want me to be sad?

Things will get really bad if I'm sad. Sit!

Get over here!

Be good. Don't get big and scare me.

If you scare me, I'll die.

This is all I have left, so don't waste it.

Stop moving!

Or the medicine will come off.

Feeling better, lucky?

You're so cute when you laugh.

Such an adorable little thing.

Slow down, or the medicine will come off.

Lucky,

is this where you live?

It's roomy.

Practitioners can stretch their tendons and exercise.

Have the freedom...

To contract and release your meridians

and change your shape as you wish.

Is this how you learned to change in size?

Is this your father?

He only has one arm...

It's Yang!

Yang the one-armed warrior!

I love him!

It would be great if I can get an autograph!

I'm drooling already...

But I don't really mean that.

Don't come for me.

I'm a coward, really.

Let's never meet again.

Can't believe those idiots want to use me as bait.

Ocean, you're almost fully recovered. Don't get worked up.

Do you still remember me, sir?

I was a Minion back at eastern depot.

What are you two doing?

Oh, I get it.

You want to touch her, but she won't let you.

You won't take no for an answer,

and that's why you're pushing back and forth.

So you can't move. Let's see what's in your pack.

Do it if you want to die.

Don't get mad.

You'll regret it if you destroy your body.

Look at this meat.

I should feed a slice to each of you.

Once you pass out, I'll take you back to eastern depot

and all will be forgiven.

And you can die as star-crossed lovers. How's that?

Open your mouth, girl.

Why is it so hard to feed you?

See what you can do when I feed you both together.

It's kind of salty.

What is this place?

These are all graves!

There's a slice of bread here.

Boss, do you think cypress will get eaten by the monster?

He will.

Then let's get outta here. Sure.

Cowards.

Have you seen Bella?

You scared me! Bella's been eaten by the monster.

Did you see it with your own eyes? I didn't.

Did you? Nope.

It's just a cemetery. Why are they so freaked out?

Bella, where are you? Bella...

My lord!

Constable Wang? Where are your manners?

Aren't you supposed to be guarding the fugitive?

My lord...

We were ambushed by rebels at Huatian courier station.

The leader was far too powerful.

I was prepared to die, but I managed to escape.

I didn't think I would be so lucky to run into you, my lord.

I subdued ocean with silver needles. He's paralyzed.

Let's go to Huatian and destroy them!

Wang...

You've been my spy and vessel for some time, right?

Spy for five years, and vessel for another five.

Fifteen years altogether, my lord.

How dirty...

Any family members at home?

Quite a few, my lord.

Good...

They'll be busy during the grave sweeping festival.

That's right.

Get us to Huatian station now!

We're off!

Oh, no, frigid and the others are in danger.

Find a place to hide, lucky.

Oh, crap!

We have to run!

What's going on?

The eastern depot is here. I wanted to

use this idiot to bait the monster and then this happens.

Should we fight them head on?

With what?

They're killers from eastern depot!

I have an idea.

Run.

Saucy!

If you don't run now, it'll be too late.

I admire your chivalry!

Respect!

What's wrong with you people?

You got to wait for us. Let's go!

What's frigid going to do?

When we master our martial arts,

we'll avenge her. Come on.

No!

I'm sorry I offended you, frigid,

and I'm sorry that blade harassed you.

Please don't hold a grudge. We're sorry.

Our kung fu skills are limited, so we can't be of help.

Don't worry. You're a good girl.

I won't resent you. Take blade and go.

Let's go!

Frigid.

I'm the one eastern depot wants. Get to safety with them.

You still don't get it, ocean.

What is it?

I've been following you, with plenty of chances to save you.

But why do you think I chose to rescue you here?

Because there's no one within 15 kilometers in any direction.

When you're backed into a corner, you might as well be dead.

My whole family died at the hands of eastern depot.

I survived because you saved me in time.

Kill him!

I've been feeling uneasy because I haven't gotten revenge.

I was planning to fight eastern depot to the death anyway.

Come here and sit.

Sit down.

I'll face death with you.

I was touched by your love,

so I decided to die with you here.

Right. A true hero doesn't run at the first sign of trouble.

The south Sichaun bandits are all about loyalty!

No way we can abandon the old and weak here.

Just stop lying!

Spare the flowery excuses already.

The truth is...

We're stuck here! We're screwed.

We've been surrounded!

That's the commander of eastern depot...

Crane.

My god, I'm hungry.

We're so dead.

Crane,

how dare you?

How dare you raise your voice in here?

Don't you know that our lord likes silence?

Kneel...

since you know who I am...

For whom do you work for?

Ci-qing palace.

Ci qing palace?

Why would the crown prince send you here?

Since when does his highness

report to eastern depot?

Of course not.

I've simply come

to retrieve an escaped beast

and a fugitive named ocean.

You used the imperial police's tamer to tame those beasts

with the intention of assassinating his highness.

To cover your tracks, you slaughtered countless others.

That's punishable by death to you and your family.

How can you pin false accusations on me?

You need proof.

The proof is inside this building.

Hand me the evidence!

Yes, ma'am!

Ocean.

You think you can get away,

but his highness has been watching you for a long time.

Now I have both the animal and the fugitive in my hands.

What do you think of my evidence?

I swear it was a mistake.

Please think of the decades I've served the court

and spare my life.

Get me the execution cloth!

His highness is in a merciful mood.

Considering that you served his majesty for so many years,

I'll make sure you have a fully intact corpse.

Oh no! Can't see me!

Lucky...

Since his majesty's beast is here,

that means the content of this bag

is definitely fake.

Who hit me?

He did.

Good job!

The little show you just did

was quite a performance.

If I'm not mistaken,

you're frigid, daughter of a traitor.

The loving glance that ocean just gave you

sold you out, I'm afraid.

I've had enough!

I told you this plan isn't going to work.

Shut your mouth!

Idiots!

All of you are idiots!

I told you already!

Stop playing tricks or going against the emperor.

But you guys didn't listen.

Now you all look like fools.

What are you so afraid of, blade?

We can die and take that dog with us.

You can die all you want,

but did you think about what I want?

Being stuck here with you is already torture.

You! To save that lump of coal,

you duped Bella and I to this godforsaken place.

Then that old man popped up, then came these two bandits.

Then this imbecile fell out of the sky.

Fine, I kept playing along.

Then you tell me that the money never existed?

You put us through all this

just to save your boyfriend!

You coward. You're saving your own ass

by pinning everything on her.

Who are you to lecture me?

An imperial police turned fugitive.

Was it for national security?

No, it was for this woman!

Ocean the great warrior... Do you deserve to be called one?

Sorry about this.

Calm down, blade.

Stay away from me!

I'm not your buddy!

I'm risking my life, and you're playing with a monster.

Then you call me ruthless?!

You're going too far.

I'm going too far?

Who here isn't doing worse things than me?

You!

You risked our lives for your stupid revenge.

That's downright evil.

You!

Greedy old man with the guts to demand 30% of the cut.

After we're killed, they should slice you three more times.

And you two bums...

Trying to kill us for a piece of meat, like some wild dog.

Who are you calling a wild dog?

I'll give you a bite right now!

What are you looking at?

You're the cruelest of them all.

Burning up a mountain and sacrificing lives

just to draw a monster to you?

You're a curse to anyone who runs into you!

La la la, blah blah blah.

Good job.

Good job.

That must feel good.

Honest, righteous young men like you

are in short supply these days.

What's your name, boy?

My surname is Zhen, named blade.

Formerly the Sichuan-Shaanxi rebel forces,

but now your humble servant.

If you don't mind...

I'd like to call you...

My godfather.

Come here. Godfather.

Good boy. I'll give you a hug later.

I've never seen anyone more shameless than me.

You're a despicable man!

What a coward!

I pegged you wrong, blade.

I should be saying that!

Blade.

That man is ruthless.

It won't do you any good to work for him.

Won't do me any good to stick with you, either.

Look at everything you've done.

You're all just looking out for yourselves.

I just want to live.

Is that so wrong?

Blade.

You loathsome scoundrel.

You deserve to die.

Crane,

we'll settle our score later.

Save me, godfather!

I'll help you, ocean.

So will well.

I'm going to kill you in the name of the Guiyi army!

This jerk has to die today!

Don't worry, my child.

How can I let any harm come to you?

I still need someone to speak the truth to my face.

My lord.

That stings.

I got you.

Great warrior ocean...

That was a bull's eye, right?

Damn it, it hurts like hell.

Right in his Achilles' heel.

Serves you right!

Crane's weak spot

is the central meridian on his back.

So our plan B

is to force him to use his power

while one of us stabs him in his Achilles' heel.

That's our only chance of survival.

Sounds good.

What are you trying to say?

Pretend to betray us

and get his trust.

Go around his back and stab his Achilles' heel.

You must be kidding.

How do I go around to his back

then stab him with a dagger?

You're unleashing some serious traitor vibes.

You're the best man for the job.

Do I look like a traitor?

You do.

You really do.

Stay out of this, you brat!

Sounds right. You can do it, kid.

My lord. Kill them all, right now!

Yes, my lord!

My fellow heroes,

leave this to the south Sichuan bandits.

That's right. You're about to see our moves.

Saucy!

The bandits combination fists!

Combination fists?

I'll make your eyelids close first!

Come on, we haven't merged yet.

Ocean,

I'll take care of this one.

Careful, sir.

How can you use a gun? That's cheating!

You want to take me on? You shameless thug!

I want that gun, blade!

It's so awesome!

It's right there. Go get it.

Who else wants to get shot?

This is great! Ocean's powers are back to normal.

Spare me, ocean!

We were just following orders.

Our consciences are killing us. We can't sleep.

We can't even eat. That old fart,

forced us to do bad things every day.

He's the killer. We are innocent. Spare us!

Long live the Guiyi army!

I'm with you guys now! I'm in, too!

I'm with you guys now!

You like hearing the truth, right?

Did you hear that?

This is eye-opening.

I've never heard so many truths in my life.

My lord!

I have a truth to reveal, too.

I actually serve the eastern depot.

I'm secretly serving you now.

Go away!

Did I not speak clearly enough?

You were loud and clear.

The problem is...

I don't trust anyone now.

Crane.

Didn't I get you in your Achilles' heel?

I've been practicing the Jiuyang virgin fist for years.

I don't have any Achilles' heel.

I'm invincible.

I told you this wasn't going to work!

So you're the slut that stole ocean from me.

How dare you?

What you have is nothing

compared to the 20 years I've had with ocean.

Let her go!

Ocean.

Is she prettier...

Or am I prettier?

Please don't look at me with those queer eyes.

Such an emotional man.

Fight me instead.

You really want to fight me? Fine.

I want her to watch you slowly die by my hand.

Ocean...

Ocean! Ocean! Are you alright?

Ocean! Frigid.

Don't die, ocean. Frigid.

If you die, then it's all over.

Are you all right?

You're the only real fighter we have.

I can't believe he perfected his powers.

Now he is invincible.

The only thing in this world

that can defeat him

is the extinct one-armed palm.

The one-armed palm?

I know it.

I know it!

How? I taught you everything you know.

I really do know it!

Seriously?

Positive!

Then give it a try. Does she really know it?

We're screwed.

Hang in there! Will this really work?

We've got a fighting chance. Help her!

Concentrate! Don't lose focus!

Should I run or should I help them?

Of course I should help them, you idiot!

Lucky! No!

A little thing like you is going to defeat me?

Stay away, lucky!

Run, lucky!

You'll die.

Run away!

Amazing!

You think I'll be intimidated because you turned big?

That looks painful.

Good thing that's not me.

Do it!

I'm not afraid of your crappy power.

Get his face again!

That's awesome.

He must at least be paralyzed by now.

You think this is victory for you?

You troublemakers.

All of you are going to die

right here with me.

What's this?

Scratching stick?

Is this one of those signal cannons from Persia?

Fire it into the air, and the brigade will fire at us, right?

Why do you have it?!

Let me refresh your memory.

When I told you just now that I work for eastern depot,

that's when I stole it from you.

So what if you have it?

Do you even know how to use it?

You must think I'm an idiot. It's easy. Just press like this...

You can have this. Idiot.

Don't give it to me! I don't know how to use it, either!

Hide! Oh my god!

Bella. Where do we hide, boss?!

Hide!

Lucky!

Ocean...

Don't go out there! You'll die!

Lucky!

Run!

You first, kid.

You first, sir. You first, kid.

You can have the last bun, boss.

You get hungry easily, saucy. You should eat it.

I don't need it.

I've got another bun here.

Didn't you say this was the last one?!

Don't worry, Bella, I'll protect you.

In all the years I've known you,

growing up together...

This is the first time you've acted like a man.

You first, sir. You first, kid.

You first, sir. Fine, then you can die first.

Get in here or you'll die!

Assholes!

Buddha palm!

Lucky!

Lucky!

You can't possibly be dead.

Lucky!

Lucky!

Lucky!

Lucky!

Lucky!

Lucky!

Luck...

Lucky!

Get up!

I still have to complete my training.

Lucky!

Damn it, you made me cry.

Can't believe it's laughing.

This is unbelievable.

That's harsh. Save me, ocean!

Get him!

I'm sorry! Good job!

You reap what you sow!

Thank you, frigid.

Stop following me! Why are you still on my ass?

What did I do to you, man?

We're not the same kind.

I've got no love for you.

Just get away from me.

Save me, ocean!

Master ocean!

Why won't he leave me alone?!

It's because of this.

I just picked this up in the woods.

It's a dangerous world out there.

If it's treacherous even for us,

imagine how it'll be for you.

Am I right?

Go back to the woods.

I hope this bracelet will bring you luck.

Ocean...

Don't cry.

Go on.

Don't be sad.

Will we ever see it again, blade?

Of course we will, the clever thing will find us.

Thank you, all of you.

I know we've been a burden

and dragged you all into trouble.

We're really sorry.

Actually, I should thank all of you.

I didn't even believe in myself,

but all of you believed in me

and gave me the important job of playing traitor.

Blade, I feel like my love for you just went up a notch.

After this ordeal,

I feel like we've come closer together.

I hope we can all be friends.

Look, everyone, I'm usually a lone wolf.

And it gets pretty lonely.

Where are you guys off to?

Would you all mind if I tagged along?

Join us.

Boss,

I feel like we've finally done something meaningful.

I'm overflowing with joy.

Ocean, I'm sticking with you from now on.

Sounds good!

You two are still young.

I've haven't done a decent thing in my old age.

I feel like...

I've matured.

But I think you've gotten younger.

I have a confession to make.

There's an eastern depot vault nearby.

It's completely unguarded,

and there are a lot of gold inside.

I'm not joking.

You can all grab as much as you like.

Call it a token of appreciation from the two of us.

In that case...

Bella and I have a small errand to run.

We'll take our leave.

We'll be right back.

We're not coming right back.

Maybe I'm better off alone after all.

I'm starving, saucy. Let's get something to eat.

Don't be a glutton. Then again, everyone's got to eat.

I'm starving, too.

How did you find time to put on so much make-up?

It's so nice that you should keep it on.

Let's go!

Let's go! What are you doing?

You want a bun? I've got some.

Oh, I shouldn't have said that. Buns?

I was just kidding. Where is it?

Where did you get the bun?

I'm getting angry now.

I don't want to do this anymore.

Fine, I'll fetch! I wanna go home...

Fetching is so much hard work...