Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:02,600 --> 00:00:05,240
Don't know where you were,
but here's what you missed.
2
00:00:05,480 --> 00:00:08,200
They're taking out the sewer main
and shutting water off.
3
00:00:08,440 --> 00:00:10,671
- What about Aunt Ginger?
- Let me spell this out.
4
00:00:10,880 --> 00:00:13,111
The city digs up some bones,
the police show up.
5
00:00:13,360 --> 00:00:16,592
You buried a body
and you stole from the federal government.
6
00:00:16,800 --> 00:00:18,598
You will never get out of prison.
7
00:00:18,800 --> 00:00:22,237
My-dad-is-gay-for-your-brother thing.
It's on a film loop in my brain.
8
00:00:22,440 --> 00:00:24,432
I'll be back for dinner. Buck up, kiddo.
9
00:00:24,640 --> 00:00:27,314
No biggie, just my universe falling apart.
10
00:00:27,520 --> 00:00:30,399
We are literally digging up a body.
11
00:00:30,600 --> 00:00:34,230
Walk away. Yeah, why don't you go cry
to your gay dad about it?
12
00:00:34,440 --> 00:00:37,080
- Hey, what did the doc say?
- I need to know the truth.
13
00:00:37,280 --> 00:00:39,317
- Can I have a baby?
- What about a surrogate?
14
00:00:39,520 --> 00:00:41,637
- You two will take it from me?
- Yes, Mama.
15
00:00:41,840 --> 00:00:44,196
It will be our child.
It will be your grandchild.
16
00:00:44,400 --> 00:00:48,076
Know the guy you beat? Wants me to sneak
into his mansion, take his crap.
17
00:00:48,280 --> 00:00:52,433
- What do you see in that geriatric Viagroid?
- Isn't afraid to kiss me.
18
00:00:53,160 --> 00:00:55,072
- I can take care of you.
- No, you can't.
19
00:00:55,320 --> 00:00:56,993
Get in the car. Get in the car.
20
00:00:57,240 --> 00:00:59,118
I love you, Debbie.
21
00:01:00,200 --> 00:01:04,638
Operator, can you connect me
with Child Welfare Services?
22
00:01:04,840 --> 00:01:07,799
I would like
to report a negligent situation.
23
00:01:08,040 --> 00:01:09,110
Who the hell are you?
24
00:01:09,320 --> 00:01:11,915
I'm Britney
from Child Protective Services.
25
00:02:36,160 --> 00:02:37,958
Whoa, wait. What the hell is going on?
26
00:02:38,160 --> 00:02:40,197
Department of Family Services
is taking us.
27
00:02:40,400 --> 00:02:42,437
- What? Can they do that?
- It won't last.
28
00:02:42,680 --> 00:02:44,990
- What was it last time, a week?
- Nine days.
29
00:02:45,200 --> 00:02:48,238
Twenty bucks says we're back in five.
30
00:02:48,440 --> 00:02:53,560
- Can I get their placement addresses now?
- Not until intake interviews are complete.
31
00:02:53,760 --> 00:02:56,150
Who reported us?
32
00:02:58,920 --> 00:03:01,037
Come on, who was it?
33
00:03:15,480 --> 00:03:17,278
Frank!
34
00:03:17,480 --> 00:03:18,834
Frank?
35
00:03:19,040 --> 00:03:20,110
Frank.
36
00:03:20,960 --> 00:03:22,553
Frank.
37
00:03:23,080 --> 00:03:26,596
I'm off to my hypnotherapy appointment.
I need you to watch Hiram.
38
00:03:26,800 --> 00:03:29,759
Kind of in the middle of something, Sheils.
Where's Jody?
39
00:03:29,960 --> 00:03:31,553
He's working at the tattoo parlor.
40
00:03:31,760 --> 00:03:34,434
Marking idiots with ink
so the rest of us can recognize them.
41
00:03:34,640 --> 00:03:37,200
Frank, you have tattoos.
42
00:03:38,000 --> 00:03:39,320
Point well taken.
43
00:03:39,520 --> 00:03:44,276
And if you're doing laundry, can you
put some of Hymie's onesies in?
44
00:03:44,480 --> 00:03:47,473
Might as well,
you're both covered in pee pee.
45
00:03:52,120 --> 00:03:53,349
Shh.
46
00:03:58,040 --> 00:04:00,396
Here you go, buddy.
47
00:04:02,640 --> 00:04:06,793
I just want you to know
that my dumping you and leaving town...
48
00:04:07,840 --> 00:04:11,356
...is in no way a reflection
of my feelings toward you, Hiram.
49
00:04:11,600 --> 00:04:13,831
I just gotta lay low a little bit...
50
00:04:14,040 --> 00:04:17,556
...in case they find Ginger's body
in my backyard.
51
00:04:27,600 --> 00:04:29,319
Shit, I got a shift in 10 minutes.
52
00:04:29,520 --> 00:04:32,035
Yeah, go to your shift.
I'll take care of this.
53
00:04:33,520 --> 00:04:36,160
- Wasn't sure I'd see you again.
- Yeah.
54
00:04:36,360 --> 00:04:38,033
I wasn't either.
55
00:04:41,920 --> 00:04:45,152
Gonna see if I can get one
of the cock-gobblers to cover my shift...
56
00:04:45,360 --> 00:04:48,512
...so I can get over to the DFS,
start tracking down the kids.
57
00:04:52,560 --> 00:04:53,596
You guys okay?
58
00:04:53,800 --> 00:04:56,634
Oh, yeah. Ain't our first time at the rodeo.
59
00:04:56,840 --> 00:05:00,834
Because Liam is still cute and little,
he'll go to some loving home with people...
60
00:05:01,040 --> 00:05:05,080
...who want a family, but waited so their egg
batter rotted, so can't have their own.
61
00:05:05,320 --> 00:05:07,596
Debbie and Carl will be placed together
because--
62
00:05:07,800 --> 00:05:10,872
Because the state always tries
to keep siblings together.
63
00:05:11,120 --> 00:05:14,272
And Lip and I can handle
whatever foster nut-jobs we end up with.
64
00:05:14,480 --> 00:05:17,951
Remember that last guy with the, uh...?
Was it the fucking bathroom peephole?
65
00:05:18,160 --> 00:05:20,550
- Yeah.
- This time's gonna be a little different.
66
00:05:20,760 --> 00:05:23,036
I've placed Liam and Carl together.
67
00:05:23,240 --> 00:05:25,994
But Debbie unfortunately
has to be placed separately.
68
00:05:27,760 --> 00:05:30,070
All by myself?
69
00:05:32,720 --> 00:05:36,919
And Phillip and Ian, you're too old to be
placed, so you're going to a group home.
70
00:05:48,240 --> 00:05:51,995
- Like a whore's period, late again, bitch.
- You're wasting your talents, Patty.
71
00:05:52,240 --> 00:05:54,152
You should be tweeting this crap.
72
00:05:56,440 --> 00:05:58,238
You're late.
73
00:05:58,600 --> 00:06:00,398
I know, I'm sorry. Look.
74
00:06:00,600 --> 00:06:04,116
I have a family emergency
and was wondering if I could skip my shift.
75
00:06:05,360 --> 00:06:06,476
Would you look at this?
76
00:06:07,320 --> 00:06:08,515
It's filthy.
77
00:06:08,760 --> 00:06:12,151
My back is filthy
because you haven't washed it.
78
00:06:12,360 --> 00:06:14,158
So, uh, why should I wash yours?
79
00:06:14,360 --> 00:06:17,910
Look, I need a couple hours to get
to the Department of Family Services.
80
00:06:18,120 --> 00:06:21,955
They yanked my brothers and sister
from our house. Gotta find where they are.
81
00:06:22,160 --> 00:06:26,154
Make sure they're safe and not
with any psychos or anything. Please.
82
00:06:26,400 --> 00:06:30,314
Sorry, but, uh, you know, if you can't
get anyone to cover your shift...
83
00:06:30,520 --> 00:06:34,355
You know as well I do none of those bitches
are gonna cover for me.
84
00:06:35,920 --> 00:06:39,516
I still have that video of you and have
no problem sending it to your wife.
85
00:06:39,720 --> 00:06:43,316
I have no problem going to DFS to tell
them you steal and show up high.
86
00:06:43,520 --> 00:06:47,560
- Your word against mine.
- Actually, the girls will back me up.
87
00:06:47,800 --> 00:06:51,316
And I'm gonna want you to quit
so I don't have to pay you unemployment.
88
00:06:52,320 --> 00:06:54,118
Fuck you, Bobby.
89
00:06:54,320 --> 00:06:56,551
Tell you what, tickle the balls a little...
90
00:06:56,760 --> 00:06:59,594
...maybe I'll write you a letter
of recommendation.
91
00:07:06,880 --> 00:07:08,837
That really puts the "home"
in group home.
92
00:07:19,320 --> 00:07:21,880
It's only gonna be a couple days, okay?
93
00:07:22,120 --> 00:07:24,316
Every Gallagher can handle that, right?
94
00:07:24,520 --> 00:07:28,036
- I'll take care of Liam.
- Yes, you will.
95
00:07:33,120 --> 00:07:34,759
Hey, Debs.
96
00:07:37,600 --> 00:07:39,319
I'll see you soon, all right?
97
00:07:39,560 --> 00:07:41,074
Hey.
98
00:07:43,880 --> 00:07:47,191
Good day, gentlemen. My name is D'Andre
and this is Gunderson House...
99
00:07:47,440 --> 00:07:51,434
...a level-14 boys group home, housing
underage D&D's in the Chicago system.
100
00:07:51,640 --> 00:07:54,075
Is that "Dungeons and Dragons" or...?
101
00:07:54,320 --> 00:07:56,551
Delinquents and deviants. Follow me.
102
00:07:57,640 --> 00:08:01,156
This will be your primary residence
until we figure out which one you are.
103
00:08:01,360 --> 00:08:03,670
Your wallets and cell phones
will be in my care...
104
00:08:03,920 --> 00:08:07,596
...until you've proven to me
that you can follow the rules.
105
00:08:07,840 --> 00:08:10,878
- So this is like prison?
- It's up to you.
106
00:08:11,080 --> 00:08:15,677
You will be given an opportunity to earn
back your money and cell phone privileges.
107
00:08:15,880 --> 00:08:18,395
- Gee, thanks.
- You would do well to shut your mouth...
108
00:08:18,640 --> 00:08:20,597
...and keep your eyes open in here.
109
00:08:26,200 --> 00:08:29,477
Uh, the county database
says you're available for placement...
110
00:08:29,680 --> 00:08:32,798
...but, um, I'm concerned
there are too many children in your care.
111
00:08:33,000 --> 00:08:34,798
I'm sure there's some kind of limit.
112
00:08:35,000 --> 00:08:39,631
These ain't cats, honey, they're kids.
They need someone to take care of them.
113
00:08:39,840 --> 00:08:41,479
It's why the good Lord put me here.
114
00:08:41,680 --> 00:08:45,435
So I can take in all his babies
don't nobody else want.
115
00:08:46,600 --> 00:08:47,750
Come here, sweetheart.
116
00:08:50,040 --> 00:08:52,555
Come on, I'm not gonna bite you. Ha, ha.
117
00:08:53,560 --> 00:08:55,677
You're a blessing.
118
00:08:56,560 --> 00:09:00,349
Mama Kamala is truly blessed
to have you.
119
00:09:01,720 --> 00:09:02,949
Yeah.
120
00:09:04,880 --> 00:09:07,839
It's only for a few days. I'll be okay.
121
00:09:08,960 --> 00:09:11,077
Um, this is my number.
122
00:09:11,320 --> 00:09:12,754
If you have any questions...
123
00:09:12,960 --> 00:09:17,193
...or, you know, if you just want to talk
about anything, call me anytime, okay?
124
00:09:19,200 --> 00:09:20,395
Okey-dokey.
125
00:09:24,720 --> 00:09:26,552
Bye-bye, now.
126
00:09:33,840 --> 00:09:36,514
Rule number one:
No sitting on the good furniture.
127
00:09:37,160 --> 00:09:38,913
This is the good furniture?
128
00:09:39,520 --> 00:09:42,638
Rule number two: No sass, you hear me?
129
00:09:44,040 --> 00:09:46,635
Let me look inside that bag.
Give me that bag.
130
00:09:46,840 --> 00:09:50,311
Make sure you ain't got nothing in there
that get you in trouble.
131
00:09:57,640 --> 00:10:02,476
Why you standing there eyeballing me?
Get busy minding them kids.
132
00:10:09,200 --> 00:10:11,237
Hi. I'm Debbie.
133
00:10:11,440 --> 00:10:12,999
LaRonda.
134
00:10:13,200 --> 00:10:17,160
- You ain't getting your bags back.
- I know.
135
00:10:17,360 --> 00:10:20,034
And what's your name?
136
00:10:20,720 --> 00:10:23,155
We want to be completely honest
with you, Carl.
137
00:10:23,360 --> 00:10:26,671
We have been looking to adopt
a biracial baby for quite some time...
138
00:10:26,880 --> 00:10:29,600
...and when they called about Liam,
we were over the moon.
139
00:10:29,800 --> 00:10:32,634
And then the state told us about you.
140
00:10:33,240 --> 00:10:35,357
And we want to try to keep you
two together.
141
00:10:35,560 --> 00:10:38,678
- So let's give this foursome a try.
- Which one are you again?
142
00:10:38,880 --> 00:10:41,554
I'm Cassius and this is Lanier.
143
00:10:41,760 --> 00:10:43,558
So you guys are gay?
144
00:10:43,760 --> 00:10:45,240
- Yup.
- Yes.
145
00:10:45,440 --> 00:10:48,797
Does, like, shit ever get stuck
on the tip of your dick?
146
00:10:52,360 --> 00:10:53,396
Uh...
147
00:10:58,200 --> 00:10:59,953
Gallagher?
148
00:11:05,000 --> 00:11:06,434
I was hoping to see Marilyn.
149
00:11:06,680 --> 00:11:09,070
She's been our caseworker
the last couple years.
150
00:11:09,280 --> 00:11:11,875
Well, uh, the turnover rate in our field
is quite high.
151
00:11:12,080 --> 00:11:15,630
It's really a wonder Marilyn lasted
as long as she did.
152
00:11:15,840 --> 00:11:16,956
So how can I help you?
153
00:11:17,160 --> 00:11:19,311
Give me addresses
where the kids were placed.
154
00:11:19,520 --> 00:11:23,958
I told you I can't give out any information
about the case until intakes are complete.
155
00:11:24,200 --> 00:11:27,750
Come on, Marilyn always used to give me
the info so I know they're okay...
156
00:11:27,960 --> 00:11:31,840
...and can get them stuff
like books or clothes or whatever.
157
00:11:32,080 --> 00:11:34,879
That is a clear violation of policy
on Marilyn's part.
158
00:11:35,080 --> 00:11:37,640
Hey, I know you think you're helping...
159
00:11:37,880 --> 00:11:40,475
...but as someone who's been in and out
of the system...
160
00:11:40,720 --> 00:11:42,473
...I can tell you it's a nightmare.
161
00:11:43,480 --> 00:11:46,996
These kids have a big sister
and I just want to make sure they're okay.
162
00:11:47,200 --> 00:11:51,194
So give me something, Britney.
I mean, break a goddamn rule.
163
00:11:53,360 --> 00:11:58,560
I can tell you that I placed two together
in one foster home, and the girl in another.
164
00:11:58,760 --> 00:12:01,275
And the two older boys
are in a group home.
165
00:12:01,480 --> 00:12:02,800
The one on Hester?
166
00:12:03,480 --> 00:12:06,473
No, they're in a level-14 on Richmond.
167
00:12:09,720 --> 00:12:11,473
Thanks.
168
00:12:13,880 --> 00:12:18,397
If I can find one family willing to take in all
the kids, could they be placed together?
169
00:12:19,880 --> 00:12:21,394
In theory, yes.
170
00:12:31,080 --> 00:12:33,720
Hey. Stella been in yet?
171
00:12:33,920 --> 00:12:36,674
- What's with the bag?
- Uh, going fishing for a couple of days.
172
00:12:36,880 --> 00:12:39,679
I heard Stella's pulling a long haul
up to Northern Canada.
173
00:12:39,880 --> 00:12:41,473
- Hoping to hitch a ride.
- Fishing?
174
00:12:41,680 --> 00:12:45,674
- Gonna use your tiny dick as a worm?
- Caught some big whales with this worm.
175
00:12:45,880 --> 00:12:47,997
Yourself included there, Moby.
176
00:12:48,240 --> 00:12:50,675
Hello, Stella.
How are you, sunshine?
177
00:12:50,880 --> 00:12:53,076
- What the hell do you want?
- Oh, you know.
178
00:12:53,280 --> 00:12:56,512
Same as you.
Free pussy and a life on the road.
179
00:12:58,120 --> 00:13:00,237
- Could I hitch a ride?
- Where you headed?
180
00:13:00,440 --> 00:13:02,033
Anywhere but here.
181
00:13:02,880 --> 00:13:07,033
- Kill somebody?
- No, no. But I did bury her.
182
00:13:08,240 --> 00:13:09,720
Could always use some company.
183
00:13:10,440 --> 00:13:12,591
I'll meet you here
before I pick up my load.
184
00:13:12,800 --> 00:13:15,599
Couple boilermakers to take the edge
off a long haul, eh?
185
00:13:15,800 --> 00:13:17,154
I don't drink before I drive.
186
00:13:17,360 --> 00:13:20,797
I end up ramming Smart Cars
in the ass for shits and giggles.
187
00:13:27,760 --> 00:13:30,434
- V?
- Upstairs.
188
00:13:36,680 --> 00:13:39,991
Making a video for one of those
do-it-yourself websites online.
189
00:13:40,200 --> 00:13:42,351
Pays $150. This one's on a high colonic.
190
00:13:42,560 --> 00:13:44,438
Next week, I bleach my exit ramp.
191
00:13:44,640 --> 00:13:46,757
- DFS took the kids this morning.
- Oh, shit.
192
00:13:46,960 --> 00:13:49,714
Think you could talk to your
caseworker about taking them?
193
00:13:49,920 --> 00:13:53,038
- Five Gallaghers in my house?
- Just for a couple days. A week.
194
00:13:53,240 --> 00:13:55,880
Lip and Ian got placed
in a level-14 group home.
195
00:13:56,080 --> 00:13:58,720
- Level-14?
- For kids that light their parents on fire...
196
00:13:58,920 --> 00:14:01,389
...or stab them in the face
while they're napping.
197
00:14:01,600 --> 00:14:03,751
You're over 21.
Can't they release them to you?
198
00:14:03,960 --> 00:14:05,633
I'd have to file for guardianship.
199
00:14:05,840 --> 00:14:11,598
Five Gallaghers. I'm gonna be
the lone black dot on a map of Ireland.
200
00:14:21,200 --> 00:14:23,840
You've been in a group home before.
201
00:14:24,040 --> 00:14:25,315
It's always like this?
202
00:14:25,520 --> 00:14:28,718
No, last place I was in
was an actual home.
203
00:14:28,920 --> 00:14:31,833
This is more like a fucking labor camp.
204
00:14:35,360 --> 00:14:37,272
Give me your cash.
205
00:14:37,520 --> 00:14:38,954
- What?
- Give me your cash.
206
00:14:39,160 --> 00:14:41,038
Now. Come on.
207
00:14:44,840 --> 00:14:47,992
Hey, Salvador, check it out,
it's that chick from the movie Brave.
208
00:14:49,040 --> 00:14:51,157
- He your boyfriend?
- No. Brother.
209
00:14:52,320 --> 00:14:53,720
I'm Lip. This is Ian.
210
00:14:54,200 --> 00:14:58,513
Uh, we don't want any trouble, all right?
211
00:14:58,720 --> 00:15:02,475
- Just passing through.
- Long as you show respect, gonna be fine.
212
00:15:13,040 --> 00:15:17,432
You're like a fucking cockroach,
able to live anywhere and feed off anything.
213
00:15:17,680 --> 00:15:19,592
Lemonade, man.
214
00:16:18,920 --> 00:16:20,912
- Jimmy?
- Darker.
215
00:16:21,160 --> 00:16:23,152
Hey. Talk to your caseworker?
216
00:16:23,360 --> 00:16:24,396
Unfortunately, yeah.
217
00:16:24,600 --> 00:16:26,717
Two reasons
why we can't take in your brood.
218
00:16:26,960 --> 00:16:30,715
The fact that you had a foster child
in your home...
219
00:16:30,960 --> 00:16:33,270
...that ran away
under your "supervision."
220
00:16:33,480 --> 00:16:38,919
Technically, the investigation is still
pending as to the quality of your care.
221
00:16:39,120 --> 00:16:41,919
The quality of my care?
Her running away is my fault?
222
00:16:42,120 --> 00:16:46,319
Oh, you know what? Do not get all up
in my grill, sister-girl, okay?
223
00:16:47,080 --> 00:16:48,594
Well, it was worth a shot.
224
00:16:48,800 --> 00:16:49,916
Now what?
225
00:16:50,680 --> 00:16:52,114
Gotta kick it into high gear.
226
00:16:52,360 --> 00:16:56,149
Figure out where the kids are staying,
get the house ready for home inspection.
227
00:16:56,360 --> 00:16:58,955
They're gonna require a fit parent
to get the kids back.
228
00:16:59,200 --> 00:17:02,511
I'm hoping to find Monica
so I don't have to deal with Frank.
229
00:17:02,920 --> 00:17:05,640
Why does it always come down to Frank?
230
00:17:09,280 --> 00:17:11,112
Carl, it's dinner time.
231
00:17:11,320 --> 00:17:12,754
Carl!
232
00:17:12,960 --> 00:17:14,952
Where is that boy?
233
00:17:16,280 --> 00:17:19,079
Yeah.
Oh, that fucker's going up your ass.
234
00:17:19,280 --> 00:17:22,079
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
235
00:17:22,280 --> 00:17:25,398
Why don't you get those pants off
so I can get in your fucking hole?
236
00:17:25,640 --> 00:17:28,872
- Why do they all have mustaches?
- Out. Now.
237
00:17:29,800 --> 00:17:32,474
That was an invasion of our privacy
and we won't have it.
238
00:17:32,680 --> 00:17:36,071
You are not to touch things
that don't belong to you.
239
00:17:36,320 --> 00:17:37,356
Now sit down.
240
00:17:37,560 --> 00:17:40,029
- Am I allowed to touch the chair?
- Don't be smart.
241
00:17:44,120 --> 00:17:45,395
What the hell is this?
242
00:17:45,600 --> 00:17:47,592
Kale, brown rice and tofu.
243
00:17:47,800 --> 00:17:52,113
Your body is a temple, Carl, and you only
want to put things in it that are natural.
244
00:17:52,320 --> 00:17:54,357
Like fists?
245
00:17:54,560 --> 00:17:56,916
I saw it in that movie.
246
00:18:39,120 --> 00:18:41,237
Holes in your backyard have been filled.
247
00:18:41,440 --> 00:18:43,830
Hey, Grandma, it's Fiona.
248
00:18:44,040 --> 00:18:46,032
Gallagher.
249
00:18:46,240 --> 00:18:48,675
Yeah. Yeah, it's been a while.
250
00:18:48,880 --> 00:18:52,794
Yeah, I was just wondering if you, by any
chance, know where my mom might be?
251
00:18:53,800 --> 00:18:55,712
Your daughter.
252
00:18:55,920 --> 00:18:57,274
Monica.
253
00:18:59,400 --> 00:19:02,711
Yeah. Yeah.
I figured, but I just thought I'd try.
254
00:19:02,920 --> 00:19:05,389
Okay, thanks.
255
00:19:09,280 --> 00:19:13,433
- Now what?
- With no Monica, kind of have no choice.
256
00:19:13,640 --> 00:19:14,676
I gotta find Frank.
257
00:19:14,920 --> 00:19:17,389
Get him sober and ready
to appear in court.
258
00:19:18,080 --> 00:19:21,915
He's like my sad-ass Obi-Wan Kenobi.
259
00:19:24,320 --> 00:19:26,232
I can help you with that.
260
00:19:28,440 --> 00:19:33,071
That's a pretty nice offer considering how
much of a dick I was to you about your dad.
261
00:19:33,280 --> 00:19:34,430
You're always a dick.
262
00:19:34,640 --> 00:19:37,951
Seriously, I don't mean to be an asshole,
it's just...
263
00:19:40,160 --> 00:19:41,514
...genetic.
264
00:19:41,720 --> 00:19:43,439
You're not wrong.
265
00:19:47,640 --> 00:19:50,872
I need to suck it up
about my dad being gay.
266
00:19:51,120 --> 00:19:52,554
And a liar.
267
00:19:52,760 --> 00:19:55,150
Yeah, I need to get over it. And I am.
268
00:19:55,360 --> 00:19:56,510
I'm good.
269
00:19:59,880 --> 00:20:01,155
Silver lining?
270
00:20:01,360 --> 00:20:02,874
Huh?
271
00:20:03,080 --> 00:20:05,800
Finally have the house to ourselves.
272
00:20:10,280 --> 00:20:14,354
Sorry, I'm just not feeling it.
273
00:20:14,600 --> 00:20:17,195
You mind if we just lay here?
274
00:20:18,320 --> 00:20:21,791
Yeah. Yeah. Sounds nice.
275
00:20:33,480 --> 00:20:36,314
- What is this stuff?
- It's pus from your mother's monkey.
276
00:20:36,520 --> 00:20:39,638
- Thought you liked the taste of that.
- What is your problem, dude?
277
00:20:39,880 --> 00:20:42,395
Nick, Salvador, find another table.
278
00:20:42,600 --> 00:20:44,034
Come on, chop-chop.
279
00:20:45,800 --> 00:20:48,315
Proof of employment came through,
so you go to work.
280
00:20:48,520 --> 00:20:51,797
I need your employer to sign this.
Times in and out, you understand?
281
00:20:52,000 --> 00:20:55,550
I'm actually pretty excited to get out there,
start looking for work.
282
00:20:55,760 --> 00:20:59,674
Nice try, you have court-mandated
community service hours you owe.
283
00:20:59,880 --> 00:21:02,190
Only a few.
Then I can start looking for work...
284
00:21:02,440 --> 00:21:06,070
...so I can become a contributing member
of our great capitalistic society.
285
00:21:06,320 --> 00:21:09,199
You think you're better
than everyone here, don't you?
286
00:21:11,160 --> 00:21:12,799
Oh, that's...
287
00:21:13,040 --> 00:21:16,829
That's rhetorical, right? I mean,
you don't want me to answer that, do you?
288
00:21:17,080 --> 00:21:21,154
See, I could smack you across the face,
but I think it's better I get out your way...
289
00:21:21,360 --> 00:21:23,317
...let life bend you over instead.
290
00:21:28,360 --> 00:21:31,114
Dude thinks he's in an episode
of Scared Straight!
291
00:21:36,880 --> 00:21:39,111
- Ethel really fucked up our kid credit.
- Yep.
292
00:21:39,320 --> 00:21:41,198
Now we can't even get a foster kid.
293
00:21:41,440 --> 00:21:44,160
- Anybody can get a foster kid.
- I think it's a sign.
294
00:21:44,400 --> 00:21:47,120
Jerry Sandusky
could probably get a foster kid.
295
00:21:47,360 --> 00:21:49,591
Need to step it up
in the surrogate department.
296
00:21:49,800 --> 00:21:52,440
We did the baster thing with your mom.
See if it works.
297
00:21:52,640 --> 00:21:54,916
Mama pukes the morning after
she gets knocked up.
298
00:21:55,160 --> 00:21:58,437
It was like watching someone take ipecac.
Could set your watch by it.
299
00:21:58,640 --> 00:22:01,633
- My super-spermazoa too much for her?
- Spermatozoa.
300
00:22:01,880 --> 00:22:05,556
I don't think it worked.
We need to try something else.
301
00:22:06,760 --> 00:22:08,194
Frank?
302
00:22:08,400 --> 00:22:11,234
Goddamn it, did you sleep here last night?
303
00:22:11,440 --> 00:22:13,079
Guilty.
304
00:22:14,800 --> 00:22:16,359
Stella here yet?
305
00:22:16,600 --> 00:22:19,911
Oh, come on. I'm not helping you up.
Get up.
306
00:22:23,720 --> 00:22:27,509
As of right now,
you are officially on the wagon.
307
00:22:27,720 --> 00:22:30,189
DFS made a surprise appearance,
the kids got pulled.
308
00:22:30,400 --> 00:22:33,711
- Time for your father-of-the-year act.
- Oh, my God. They all right?
309
00:22:33,920 --> 00:22:37,470
Tell you what, meet back at the house
and we'll get this all settled.
310
00:22:37,680 --> 00:22:40,320
Looks heavy. Why don't I carry this
back to the house?
311
00:22:40,520 --> 00:22:44,230
But I need it for some errands
I'm going to run in a little--
312
00:22:44,440 --> 00:22:46,796
Back at the house now
or you'll lose your kids...
313
00:22:47,000 --> 00:22:49,117
...and the welfare checks
that come with them.
314
00:22:49,320 --> 00:22:52,950
I go to the house, the city
finds Ginger's body, I'm toast.
315
00:22:53,160 --> 00:22:55,470
I found Ginger and I tossed her bones.
316
00:22:55,720 --> 00:22:56,756
You're safe.
317
00:22:56,960 --> 00:22:58,758
Oh.
318
00:22:59,280 --> 00:23:01,237
- That's great.
- Not for you.
319
00:23:01,480 --> 00:23:03,597
You don't do exactly as I say...
320
00:23:03,800 --> 00:23:07,077
...I'll rat you out about Ginger's checks
and your fake disability.
321
00:23:07,320 --> 00:23:08,549
You don't have the balls.
322
00:23:09,120 --> 00:23:14,354
Jesus Christ, I need you to do this.
Can you just do this?
323
00:23:14,560 --> 00:23:17,951
I'm sorry, did you just say
you need me?
324
00:23:18,200 --> 00:23:21,432
Yes. I need you to get your shit together
and get the kids back.
325
00:23:21,640 --> 00:23:24,519
Well, seeing as how you need something
from me...
326
00:23:24,720 --> 00:23:27,474
...maybe I need something from you.
327
00:23:27,680 --> 00:23:30,878
For starters, I'd like to be shown
the respect which I deserve.
328
00:23:31,080 --> 00:23:32,753
I believe I'm already doing that.
329
00:23:32,960 --> 00:23:37,398
And this one is non-negotiable,
I want free roam of my own house.
330
00:23:38,280 --> 00:23:39,953
Fine.
331
00:23:40,840 --> 00:23:43,230
We're gonna go visit Lip and Ian
in the group home.
332
00:23:43,480 --> 00:23:47,554
God knows what they've been dealing with
in that shithole. Then we find your lawyer.
333
00:23:48,600 --> 00:23:50,671
He has a lawyer?
334
00:23:55,840 --> 00:24:00,198
Don't worry, soon as I steal enough stuff
from these guys, we're out of here.
335
00:24:06,760 --> 00:24:09,673
Oh, yeah. I spent some time here...
336
00:24:09,920 --> 00:24:13,391
...that summer Mom was sent away
for knifing a poodle.
337
00:24:13,600 --> 00:24:17,674
Hey, I missed you guys.
338
00:24:17,880 --> 00:24:20,634
- How you holding up?
- We're fine. Place is a joke.
339
00:24:20,840 --> 00:24:23,912
- Still serving that rotten porridge?
- He already on the wagon?
340
00:24:24,120 --> 00:24:27,079
- Why do you say that?
- As of right now. You out on furlough?
341
00:24:27,280 --> 00:24:29,556
I've gotta work.
He's gotta finish parole hours.
342
00:24:29,760 --> 00:24:33,117
- Guys want a lift?
- Gotta get our passes signed by the driver.
343
00:24:33,360 --> 00:24:35,875
- You find Debs and the boys?
- Not yet, but I will.
344
00:24:36,080 --> 00:24:38,800
- You need anything? Cash? Clothes?
- No, no, no. Look.
345
00:24:39,000 --> 00:24:41,071
Don't worry about us. We're fine.
346
00:24:42,120 --> 00:24:43,156
Worry about him.
347
00:24:45,640 --> 00:24:47,233
Where's my hug?
348
00:24:53,520 --> 00:24:55,159
I'll wash, you dry.
349
00:25:03,640 --> 00:25:06,553
Grab a cup of Kool-Aid from the table.
350
00:25:08,680 --> 00:25:12,560
Hey, Strawberry Shortcake,
get on in here and cut my toenails!
351
00:25:14,280 --> 00:25:16,033
Okay, take over.
352
00:25:17,560 --> 00:25:18,630
Come on, come on.
353
00:25:21,320 --> 00:25:25,314
I mean, there's just no privacy. If I wanna
jack off, I gotta do it in the bathroom.
354
00:25:25,520 --> 00:25:28,752
Can't even begin to imagine
what a pussy you'd be in juvie.
355
00:25:31,400 --> 00:25:32,800
You fuck anyone in there yet?
356
00:25:33,000 --> 00:25:34,150
God, no.
357
00:25:34,360 --> 00:25:35,555
Wise choice.
358
00:25:35,800 --> 00:25:38,315
Even if you're propositioned,
it's probably a setup.
359
00:25:38,520 --> 00:25:42,833
Guys find out if you're gay and pound
the shit out of you. Not in a good way.
360
00:25:43,040 --> 00:25:45,077
Great.
361
00:25:45,280 --> 00:25:49,194
Hey, my dad took my brothers
on a run out of town for a couple of days.
362
00:25:49,440 --> 00:25:52,592
You wanna ditch that dump
and crash at my place, you can.
363
00:25:54,920 --> 00:25:59,790
- Was I just invited to a sleepover?
- Fuck you, is what you were invited to.
364
00:26:06,520 --> 00:26:07,954
Fiona here? She's not home.
365
00:26:08,160 --> 00:26:10,629
Are you okay?
Did your foster parents hurt you?
366
00:26:10,880 --> 00:26:12,030
No. We ran away.
367
00:26:12,240 --> 00:26:14,880
You can't stay.
The police will come looking for you.
368
00:26:15,080 --> 00:26:19,040
We're with these gay guys and they keep
talking about how they wanna swipe Liam.
369
00:26:19,240 --> 00:26:22,631
You gotta go back. I know what it's like
to have a foster kid run away.
370
00:26:22,840 --> 00:26:25,036
- Come on.
- But what if they really keep Liam?
371
00:26:25,240 --> 00:26:28,995
Only reason they would keep him
is if they want him. Be sure they don't.
372
00:26:29,200 --> 00:26:30,395
Be creative.
373
00:26:30,920 --> 00:26:34,470
- Can you at least hold some of my stuff?
- What stuff?
374
00:26:44,360 --> 00:26:47,273
Jesus, Lou.
375
00:26:47,640 --> 00:26:50,030
- When did that happen?
- It's not mine.
376
00:26:50,240 --> 00:26:51,993
- Get to the point, Frank.
- Who's this?
377
00:26:52,200 --> 00:26:54,635
My daughter. And her girlfriend.
378
00:26:54,880 --> 00:26:57,156
- Who's in trouble?
- DFS snatched my kids.
379
00:26:57,360 --> 00:26:59,477
- I need you to get them back.
- Catch?
380
00:26:59,720 --> 00:27:03,680
I have no money and no promise
of any coming my way anytime soon.
381
00:27:04,800 --> 00:27:06,792
Okay.
382
00:27:07,000 --> 00:27:08,275
First order of business:
383
00:27:08,520 --> 00:27:12,673
You need to get your ass to DFS
and file a petition to reinstate custody.
384
00:27:12,880 --> 00:27:14,917
You're going to need to dig up that wife.
385
00:27:15,120 --> 00:27:18,557
It's always better to have signatures
from two instead of one.
386
00:27:18,760 --> 00:27:22,197
- What if we can't find her?
- Find someone that looks like her.
387
00:27:22,400 --> 00:27:24,756
You're going to need her
to take parenting classes.
388
00:27:24,960 --> 00:27:28,715
I'm going to go ahead and get the case file
and I will see you at the hearing.
389
00:27:28,920 --> 00:27:32,709
In the meantime, no drugs, no booze,
no poppy seed bagels.
390
00:27:32,960 --> 00:27:36,192
I need your piss clean
and your eyes white.
391
00:27:43,400 --> 00:27:45,312
Thanks for the phone call.
392
00:27:45,520 --> 00:27:47,796
You know how hard it is
to find a public phone?
393
00:27:48,000 --> 00:27:50,993
Ian managed. Then I had to track
your ass through the city.
394
00:27:51,200 --> 00:27:52,759
Sorry, I've been busy.
395
00:27:52,960 --> 00:27:55,873
Molly's mom showed up at my house.
396
00:27:56,080 --> 00:27:59,471
- She's still alive?
- Turns out Molly's a runner.
397
00:27:59,680 --> 00:28:03,071
- What, you just let her take her?
- Oh, I was supposed to stop her?
398
00:28:03,320 --> 00:28:05,630
If she ran, it was probably
for a good reason, no?
399
00:28:05,840 --> 00:28:08,639
Or not. I used to run away all the time
when I was little.
400
00:28:08,840 --> 00:28:11,150
My point exactly.
401
00:28:11,720 --> 00:28:15,430
My dad's out of town for a few days
and I told Mickey he could have the place.
402
00:28:15,640 --> 00:28:16,676
Can I stay with you?
403
00:28:16,920 --> 00:28:20,197
I got to play it straight
at this group home for a bit.
404
00:28:24,080 --> 00:28:26,834
Maybe I can sneak you in tonight, though?
405
00:28:27,040 --> 00:28:28,838
Promise I won't get gang raped?
406
00:28:29,040 --> 00:28:30,633
Nope.
407
00:28:31,360 --> 00:28:34,080
Whatever, I'm in.
408
00:28:37,720 --> 00:28:39,598
Why are you eating candy before dinner?
409
00:28:39,800 --> 00:28:41,951
Because it says here that dark chocolate...
410
00:28:42,160 --> 00:28:44,755
...has an amino acid
that doubles your sperm count.
411
00:28:44,960 --> 00:28:49,477
I didn't read that one, but Mama says
asparagus and garlic does the trick, so ta-da.
412
00:28:49,680 --> 00:28:51,876
If I eat all that,
my piss is going to stink.
413
00:28:52,120 --> 00:28:54,032
And Mama's bringing over oysters.
414
00:28:54,240 --> 00:28:59,759
But we got to think of a better
delivery system than the turkey baster.
415
00:29:01,760 --> 00:29:03,353
Squirt gun.
416
00:29:03,560 --> 00:29:07,349
- Kind of messy.
- What about a straw? Silly straw.
417
00:29:09,160 --> 00:29:12,278
- Jacobs.
- Here.
418
00:29:12,520 --> 00:29:15,513
And Weston.
419
00:29:16,880 --> 00:29:20,032
- Weston!
- Here.
420
00:29:20,520 --> 00:29:26,551
All right, good night you shits of Chicago,
pricks of Illinois. Ha, ha.
421
00:29:45,520 --> 00:29:47,557
Have fun.
422
00:29:58,480 --> 00:30:00,039
How'd you get the private room?
423
00:30:00,240 --> 00:30:01,276
I made some friends.
424
00:30:01,520 --> 00:30:04,479
This what it's gonna be like
when you sneak me into your dorm?
425
00:30:04,680 --> 00:30:08,594
Little different. Guessing my dorm mates
will be literate.
426
00:30:11,640 --> 00:30:15,236
You are out of your mind.
Have you seen that fucking ponytail?
427
00:30:15,440 --> 00:30:17,671
It's a powerful ponytail, man.
That's bullshit.
428
00:30:17,880 --> 00:30:19,917
Seagal could totally kick Van Damme's ass.
429
00:30:20,120 --> 00:30:24,512
Unless, unless
it's Double Impact Van Damme.
430
00:30:24,720 --> 00:30:27,030
Because that's some Van Double Damme.
431
00:30:32,280 --> 00:30:33,634
Fuck Van Damme.
432
00:30:42,920 --> 00:30:44,593
Are you out of your fucking mind?
433
00:30:44,800 --> 00:30:47,713
Kev is just going to lie with you
for procreation, not sex.
434
00:30:47,920 --> 00:30:50,879
- What is the difference?
- It's clinical so no one enjoys it.
435
00:30:51,080 --> 00:30:53,231
Millions of sperm died
in that turkey baster.
436
00:30:53,440 --> 00:30:56,797
This will deliver the biggest batch.
The bigger the batch, the better the chance.
437
00:30:57,040 --> 00:31:01,990
Uh-uh. No, honey, this is an express bus
to The Maury Povich Show.
438
00:31:03,400 --> 00:31:07,917
I want nothing more than to be able
to give you the baby that I know you want...
439
00:31:08,120 --> 00:31:11,875
...and the grandbaby that you deserve.
440
00:31:12,240 --> 00:31:16,632
But I can't. And it kills me.
441
00:31:18,320 --> 00:31:23,395
Please, just give it a go
while you're still ovulating.
442
00:31:28,960 --> 00:31:32,874
What kind of hard liquor you got
and how much?
443
00:31:35,320 --> 00:31:36,913
Damn, it's hot up here.
444
00:31:37,160 --> 00:31:40,153
That's because heat rises.
445
00:31:40,360 --> 00:31:43,558
Then how come space is so cold?
446
00:31:47,280 --> 00:31:48,873
I got it.
447
00:31:49,920 --> 00:31:51,115
Who's at the door?
448
00:31:51,320 --> 00:31:54,279
- Hey, uh...
- Who's at the door?
449
00:31:54,480 --> 00:31:56,790
- No, Frank, no.
- Wait.
450
00:31:57,000 --> 00:32:00,550
- You-- First of all, get out. Get out!
- Just hear me out.
451
00:32:00,760 --> 00:32:04,754
- You are not allowed in here. Get out.
- DFS pinched my kids.
452
00:32:04,960 --> 00:32:07,873
I need you to pretend to be Monica
to help me get them back.
453
00:32:08,080 --> 00:32:10,959
What? No, no.
Why should I do anything for you?
454
00:32:11,160 --> 00:32:15,074
- You left Hiram all alone.
- I am begging you.
455
00:32:15,320 --> 00:32:19,712
As someone who knows what it feels like
to lose a kid. Karen ran away.
456
00:32:19,920 --> 00:32:23,709
Can you imagine what it must feel like
to have them taken from you?
457
00:32:23,960 --> 00:32:29,035
This isn't for Frank, okay?
It's for Debbie and Carl and Liam.
458
00:32:31,080 --> 00:32:34,437
Maybe you should do it, Shelly Bear.
For the kids.
459
00:32:48,080 --> 00:32:50,311
Give it up, Kev.
460
00:32:50,520 --> 00:32:56,596
You can't make it dark enough
to deny what's about to happen in here.
461
00:32:56,800 --> 00:32:59,235
I wish I was drunk as you.
462
00:32:59,440 --> 00:33:02,717
No, I can't risk the whiskey dick.
Okay, let's get this going.
463
00:33:02,920 --> 00:33:06,470
- Ha, ha.
- Shh. Knock it off, Mama.
464
00:33:08,320 --> 00:33:11,233
Wait, wait, wait.
What's with the KKK costume?
465
00:33:11,440 --> 00:33:15,434
I saw them use something like this at that
super Jew-y wedding I went to last year.
466
00:33:15,680 --> 00:33:17,831
It keeps the skin from touching, a barrier.
467
00:33:18,040 --> 00:33:20,350
I feel like a ghost prostitute.
468
00:33:20,600 --> 00:33:23,877
You know, like that Jennifer Love Hewitt
show, you seen that?
469
00:33:24,080 --> 00:33:29,030
Where she's, like, a call girl for ghosts
or some shit.
470
00:33:29,240 --> 00:33:31,755
- That's two different shows.
- You two ready?
471
00:33:31,960 --> 00:33:36,000
Get me get the hell out of here first.
I can't watch this part.
472
00:33:39,000 --> 00:33:41,640
You okay out there?
473
00:33:42,480 --> 00:33:44,392
Yeah, I'm fine. How are you?
474
00:33:44,600 --> 00:33:46,717
- You need any help?
- No, I'm fine. I'm done.
475
00:33:46,960 --> 00:33:48,917
Thank you for asking, though.
476
00:33:49,480 --> 00:33:51,995
Why she didn't cut me a mouth hole?
477
00:33:52,200 --> 00:33:56,592
How am I supposed to--?
Whoa, hello! Ooh, ooh!
478
00:33:56,840 --> 00:34:00,356
Looks like I got a visitor down there. Ha, ha.
479
00:34:01,280 --> 00:34:02,873
Damn it!
480
00:34:03,080 --> 00:34:07,120
Ding, dong, ditch.
Somebody rang my bell, then ran away.
481
00:34:07,720 --> 00:34:09,837
Feel like I'm fucking Casper.
482
00:34:10,040 --> 00:34:12,077
Hey, you know, it's-- It's--
483
00:34:12,320 --> 00:34:14,994
It's getting seriously hard
to breathe under here.
484
00:34:15,200 --> 00:34:19,240
- Can I take this off my face?
- No! No.
485
00:34:24,120 --> 00:34:25,998
Can you dump Frank at DFS?
486
00:34:26,200 --> 00:34:28,317
I gotta drop some stuff off for Carl.
487
00:34:28,520 --> 00:34:30,671
Not a problem.
488
00:34:34,720 --> 00:34:37,758
Let's go, Frank. Showtime.
489
00:35:15,000 --> 00:35:19,119
Been a while since I've been in.
Maybe I need a new picture.
490
00:35:20,120 --> 00:35:24,592
We had a bad meth run last year and
you know what that stuff can do to you.
491
00:35:25,240 --> 00:35:28,597
They've got a website and everything.
492
00:35:30,960 --> 00:35:35,398
Well, now that you've filed your petition
to reinstate custody...
493
00:35:35,600 --> 00:35:38,035
...we'll need you
to sign up for parenting classes.
494
00:35:38,280 --> 00:35:40,351
- Parenting classes?
- Good.
495
00:35:40,560 --> 00:35:42,870
Also, there may be
some random drug tests...
496
00:35:43,080 --> 00:35:47,313
...and we'll need to set up a home visit
prior to the possible release of the children.
497
00:35:47,520 --> 00:35:51,799
So I will get the class registration.
I'll be right back.
498
00:35:53,920 --> 00:35:56,037
Fucking big brother.
499
00:35:56,240 --> 00:35:58,391
I don't want any
goddamn parenting class.
500
00:35:58,600 --> 00:35:59,670
What are they?
501
00:35:59,920 --> 00:36:03,311
You sit in a room and they lecture you
on how to be Ozzie and Harriet.
502
00:36:04,920 --> 00:36:08,834
I was thinking maybe I could figure out
where I went wrong with Karen.
503
00:36:09,040 --> 00:36:12,920
Kids come pre-wired.
It has nothing to do with your parenting.
504
00:36:14,080 --> 00:36:17,073
I pretty much like being a blond.
505
00:36:18,920 --> 00:36:21,674
I feel like cotton candy.
506
00:36:36,960 --> 00:36:42,513
Hi, uh, my name's Fiona Gallagher.
I'm here to visit Debbie.
507
00:36:42,760 --> 00:36:44,479
- She here?
- You her mother?
508
00:36:44,720 --> 00:36:49,431
Sister. I just want to say hi.
May I see her?
509
00:36:51,800 --> 00:36:54,872
I just want to talk to her.
510
00:36:55,560 --> 00:36:57,756
Hey!
511
00:36:57,960 --> 00:36:59,838
Do all your talking out here.
512
00:37:00,040 --> 00:37:02,874
I'm gonna need her back in 15 for chores.
513
00:37:05,640 --> 00:37:07,199
You okay?
514
00:37:07,400 --> 00:37:09,835
Yeah, I'm fine.
515
00:37:10,880 --> 00:37:12,872
There a million kids in there?
516
00:37:13,120 --> 00:37:15,112
Just a few, but they're really nice.
517
00:37:15,320 --> 00:37:17,277
And Kamala's not so bad.
518
00:37:17,480 --> 00:37:21,599
Bed's pretty comfortable
and there's hot water.
519
00:37:24,640 --> 00:37:28,236
I brought you some books and clothes.
520
00:37:28,680 --> 00:37:32,720
- Do you need any money?
- Nope, I'm good.
521
00:37:33,880 --> 00:37:36,839
When do you think
we can go back home?
522
00:37:38,200 --> 00:37:41,352
Soon. Real soon.
523
00:37:44,280 --> 00:37:46,192
I brought you some Hershey's Kisses too.
524
00:37:46,400 --> 00:37:50,679
These were like gold
when I was in my first foster home.
525
00:37:50,880 --> 00:37:52,678
Thanks.
526
00:38:15,040 --> 00:38:17,600
Hey, I got your brother's
working papers for today.
527
00:38:17,800 --> 00:38:20,998
- Great, I'll give them to him. Thanks.
- Where is he?
528
00:38:21,200 --> 00:38:24,159
Uh, latrine. He's been there
most of the night.
529
00:38:24,400 --> 00:38:27,552
Turns out eating diarrhea
can actually give you diarrhea, so...
530
00:38:27,760 --> 00:38:32,118
Signed. In and out.
And I better see him at lights out.
531
00:38:36,560 --> 00:38:40,270
That's it, Liam. Big circles.
532
00:38:43,240 --> 00:38:44,993
Please, come in.
533
00:38:45,200 --> 00:38:49,797
- Carl, Liam! You have a visitor.
- Hi there. I'm Lanier.
534
00:38:50,000 --> 00:38:53,960
- Hey, Fiona Gallagher.
- Fiona.
535
00:38:54,160 --> 00:39:00,680
Hey, look at you two. Hey.
536
00:39:00,880 --> 00:39:02,155
Wow, you look so clean.
537
00:39:02,400 --> 00:39:06,997
Yeah, they make us take baths every night.
They have this toilet that cleans your bits.
538
00:39:07,200 --> 00:39:08,873
A bidet.
539
00:39:09,080 --> 00:39:12,152
Sometimes in the summer
we use a wacky lawn sprinkler for that.
540
00:39:12,360 --> 00:39:17,037
But we got to watch the spinning arms.
We got to watch the spinning arms.
541
00:39:17,240 --> 00:39:19,152
Please, come. Have a seat.
542
00:39:19,360 --> 00:39:22,194
It's nice to see that the boys
have someone who loves them.
543
00:39:22,400 --> 00:39:24,915
We're glad you came.
544
00:39:26,040 --> 00:39:31,320
But just to make it clear,
we have filed the paperwork to adopt Liam.
545
00:39:31,520 --> 00:39:33,955
And we're seriously considering
adopting Carl too.
546
00:39:34,160 --> 00:39:37,710
But know that we would love for you
to stay in contact and visit often.
547
00:39:37,920 --> 00:39:41,755
We think it's important for the boys
to know where they come from.
548
00:39:41,960 --> 00:39:45,351
Why is my seat wet?
Oh, no, Liam.
549
00:39:45,560 --> 00:39:47,756
Did you pee on the couch again?
Was that you?
550
00:39:47,960 --> 00:39:52,034
- And the wall too?
- Liam, that is a matte finish!
551
00:39:52,280 --> 00:39:55,717
- How the hell are we going to get that out?
- It's paint, I can touch it up.
552
00:39:55,920 --> 00:39:59,516
Now, which color is that now,
Summer Shadow?
553
00:39:59,720 --> 00:40:05,318
He's just a baby. He didn't mean it.
Babies are just so messy.
554
00:40:08,960 --> 00:40:12,476
- Did you do that? Did you do that?
- I did it.
555
00:40:14,440 --> 00:40:16,193
All right, I got to get to work.
556
00:40:16,400 --> 00:40:19,837
All right, just give me a minute, okay?
557
00:40:20,320 --> 00:40:22,710
Want to do the honors?
558
00:40:24,000 --> 00:40:27,471
- Is that a rosary for giants?
- No.
559
00:40:27,680 --> 00:40:31,037
No, man, they're-- They're Ben Wa beads.
560
00:40:31,280 --> 00:40:34,671
You shove them in my ass
and you pull them out real slow.
561
00:40:35,400 --> 00:40:39,076
- How is that fun for me?
- Come on.
562
00:40:39,280 --> 00:40:41,875
All right, okay.
Just easy on the injured cheek.
563
00:40:42,120 --> 00:40:45,318
- I'll go on the other one, all right? Relax.
- Yeah.
564
00:40:56,200 --> 00:41:00,160
- Shit!
- What the fuck?
565
00:41:00,360 --> 00:41:02,272
Dad, Dad, hold on. Hold on.
566
00:41:02,520 --> 00:41:05,433
Mandy wasn't enough for you?
567
00:41:05,640 --> 00:41:08,917
You sick piece of shit.
568
00:41:11,440 --> 00:41:12,954
Get the fuck off him!
569
00:41:21,440 --> 00:41:26,231
No son of mine is going to be
a goddamn AIDS monkey.
570
00:41:27,360 --> 00:41:30,910
Sit your ass down, fucking ass-digger.
571
00:41:31,560 --> 00:41:33,313
Jeez.
572
00:41:49,480 --> 00:41:53,315
It's Terry. Send over the Russian.
573
00:41:57,120 --> 00:41:59,237
Okay, role play. All right.
574
00:41:59,440 --> 00:42:02,751
Monica, Frank.
575
00:42:03,280 --> 00:42:05,670
Okay, Monica, you play
the teenage daughter.
576
00:42:05,880 --> 00:42:11,990
And Frank, you be the father disciplining
her for staying out after curfew.
577
00:42:13,520 --> 00:42:17,309
Um, where the hell were you so late?
578
00:42:18,480 --> 00:42:21,439
I was fucking Mom's boyfriend.
What do you care?
579
00:42:21,680 --> 00:42:24,320
You're nothing but a little tramp.
Just like your mother.
580
00:42:24,560 --> 00:42:27,394
You know what?
If you weren't stealing from her--
581
00:42:27,640 --> 00:42:33,238
Bitch gave me herpes. As far
as I'm concerned, I deserve every dime.
582
00:42:33,480 --> 00:42:36,552
She fucking well did too.
583
00:42:43,920 --> 00:42:45,513
How was that?
584
00:42:57,760 --> 00:42:59,319
That one.
585
00:43:04,040 --> 00:43:07,317
She's going to fuck the faggot
out of you, kid.
586
00:43:08,560 --> 00:43:11,951
Ride him till he likes it, suka.
587
00:43:15,680 --> 00:43:18,479
And you're goddamn gonna watch.
588
00:43:55,920 --> 00:43:59,197
- How many more times?
- Until we complete the mission.
589
00:43:59,440 --> 00:44:02,194
Now, come on, baby.
You're Luke Skywalker...
590
00:44:02,400 --> 00:44:07,634
...and it's up to you to shoot one in
and destroy the Death Star.
591
00:44:09,200 --> 00:44:11,192
Okay. Where's the sheet?
592
00:44:11,400 --> 00:44:13,517
No. No, I couldn't breathe last time.
593
00:44:13,720 --> 00:44:16,189
Well, we got to put
a Guantanamo hood on her.
594
00:44:16,400 --> 00:44:18,392
- I don't know why I can't drink.
- Shut up.
595
00:44:18,600 --> 00:44:20,876
It's hard for all of us,
so both of you shut up.
596
00:44:21,080 --> 00:44:23,914
Now, everyone, get in your positions.
597
00:44:40,720 --> 00:44:44,475
Come on, man.
Don't do this, you piece of shit.
598
00:44:44,680 --> 00:44:46,353
You get hard when you smell pork chops.
599
00:44:46,560 --> 00:44:49,473
Yelling at it is not gonna help. Come here.
600
00:44:58,440 --> 00:45:02,229
- Come on, you piece of shit!
- Ow, ow, ow! Baby, you can't do that.
601
00:45:02,440 --> 00:45:04,796
You're gonna build calluses,
I won't feel dick.
602
00:45:05,000 --> 00:45:07,993
- Right now no one's feeling dick.
- You think this is easy?
603
00:45:08,200 --> 00:45:09,759
It's all my fault.
604
00:45:09,960 --> 00:45:16,400
You can't make the little soldier salute
if he doesn't see an officer in the room.
605
00:45:16,600 --> 00:45:19,069
I've lost all my stripes.
606
00:45:19,280 --> 00:45:22,990
Mama, this is not about you
losing anything.
607
00:45:24,480 --> 00:45:26,517
It's really me.
I'm under a lot of pressure.
608
00:45:26,720 --> 00:45:29,792
- It's all me, Mama.
- I haven't had a date in months.
609
00:45:30,000 --> 00:45:35,837
I'm old and fat and unattractive...
610
00:45:36,080 --> 00:45:38,037
...and I'm gonna die alone.
611
00:45:38,240 --> 00:45:40,994
No, you're not.
612
00:45:42,520 --> 00:45:45,479
Well, this is not helping me get hard.
613
00:45:48,760 --> 00:45:52,356
It's like when a plane goes down,
what do they call that?
614
00:45:52,600 --> 00:45:53,829
Shitty?
615
00:45:54,040 --> 00:45:58,557
No, it's never just one thing that causes it.
It's a chain reaction.
616
00:45:58,760 --> 00:46:01,832
Cascading failures.
That's what this feels like.
617
00:46:02,040 --> 00:46:05,920
Losing my job, losing the kids,
dealing with Frank.
618
00:46:07,880 --> 00:46:11,317
Someone recently told me...
619
00:46:11,520 --> 00:46:15,400
...to stop whining
and feeling sorry for myself.
620
00:46:16,520 --> 00:46:17,636
She sounds like a bitch.
621
00:46:17,840 --> 00:46:21,231
Well, she has her moments.
622
00:46:31,080 --> 00:46:35,632
Legally and morally there are acceptable
methods of punishment for children...
623
00:46:35,840 --> 00:46:38,150
...versus unacceptable methods.
624
00:46:38,360 --> 00:46:40,317
Uh, I'm sorry.
625
00:46:40,560 --> 00:46:44,873
Um, just hypothetically,
if one's teenage daughter gave birth...
626
00:46:45,080 --> 00:46:47,675
...to a baby with Down syndrome
and then took off...
627
00:46:47,880 --> 00:46:52,636
...relieving her of all responsibility,
if and when she should come back...
628
00:46:52,840 --> 00:46:54,559
...would you recommend grounding...
629
00:46:54,760 --> 00:47:00,119
...or in that instance
would a firm spanking be more...
630
00:47:00,320 --> 00:47:05,156
You know, before we take any more
questions, let's just go over some of...
631
00:47:05,360 --> 00:47:06,476
Give me a Valium.
632
00:47:06,680 --> 00:47:10,071
No, I only have one
and it's my safety net...
633
00:47:10,280 --> 00:47:12,397
...in case my hypnotherapy
doesn't work.
634
00:47:12,640 --> 00:47:16,111
Hypnotherapy is just paying to nap
in someone's office. Give me the pill.
635
00:47:16,320 --> 00:47:19,358
- It'll show up in your urine test.
- Give me the goddamn pill.
636
00:47:19,600 --> 00:47:22,320
What's the matter with you?
637
00:47:23,440 --> 00:47:25,591
Okay, come on.
638
00:47:26,520 --> 00:47:29,115
Here. Christ.
639
00:47:42,720 --> 00:47:45,394
How is she still ovulating?
What, is she part bovine?
640
00:47:45,600 --> 00:47:47,990
Shh. Focus on me.
641
00:47:48,200 --> 00:47:50,920
Now, you're gonna pretend like
you're in high school...
642
00:47:51,120 --> 00:47:53,760
...and you're going to come quickly
like a rabbit, okay?
643
00:47:53,960 --> 00:47:55,235
- Yeah.
- No, not that quick.
644
00:47:55,440 --> 00:47:57,352
Mama, get in here!
645
00:48:05,640 --> 00:48:07,711
- Not there, honey, no.
- Sorry, sorry, sorry.
646
00:48:07,920 --> 00:48:12,995
- You got a shoehorn or something?
- Can you not talk, please? Don't say a word.
647
00:48:19,280 --> 00:48:21,351
Are you crying? Oh, God, she's crying.
648
00:48:21,560 --> 00:48:26,157
Please don't cry. I'm sorry, okay?
I'm sorry, Mama.
649
00:48:26,360 --> 00:48:29,558
Okay! We're gonna do this shit,
and we're gonna be done with it.
650
00:48:29,800 --> 00:48:33,350
Kev, get that dick hard.
Mama, wipe your tears and focus.
651
00:48:33,560 --> 00:48:38,271
We need to give those little spermies
someplace happy to swim to. Lay down.
652
00:48:41,800 --> 00:48:44,679
Mama, get on it.
653
00:49:10,360 --> 00:49:12,192
Hi.
654
00:49:12,400 --> 00:49:15,757
I'm Monica. What's your name?
655
00:49:18,360 --> 00:49:22,400
Frank, wasn't the last time
I had to pee in a cup...
656
00:49:22,640 --> 00:49:24,791
...when I was pregnant with Liam?
657
00:49:25,000 --> 00:49:28,232
Remember that? It was just like yesterday.
658
00:49:28,480 --> 00:49:29,516
Oh.
659
00:50:19,600 --> 00:50:24,152
Uh, sorry, the shower ran out of hot water.
660
00:50:24,840 --> 00:50:26,991
Mama, you want Kevin to take you home?
661
00:50:27,200 --> 00:50:28,554
He can't drive with that leg.
662
00:50:28,760 --> 00:50:32,640
No, but he can get you home in a taxi.
It's the least we can do.
663
00:50:33,360 --> 00:50:36,000
Let me get my bag.
664
00:50:39,120 --> 00:50:41,191
- Hey, Carol.
- Hey, Fiona.
665
00:50:41,400 --> 00:50:42,470
Any work at the salon?
666
00:50:42,720 --> 00:50:46,111
Uh, not right now, baby,
but I'll keep you in mind.
667
00:50:46,320 --> 00:50:48,118
Thanks.
668
00:50:49,800 --> 00:50:54,113
- What was she doing here so early?
- She slept over after she and Kevin had sex.
669
00:50:54,360 --> 00:50:56,352
- What?
- Mama's the best surrogate we got.
670
00:50:56,560 --> 00:50:59,678
Turkey baster didn't work,
we had to do it the old-fashioned way.
671
00:50:59,880 --> 00:51:02,679
Jesus, V, I'm so wrapped up
in my own pity party...
672
00:51:02,880 --> 00:51:07,159
...I had no idea what kind of biblical shit
you had going on here.
673
00:51:07,360 --> 00:51:11,320
- You okay?
- If it works, I'll be fine.
674
00:51:13,240 --> 00:51:16,756
- How's Frank doing in rehab?
- So far he seems to be holding it together.
675
00:51:16,960 --> 00:51:19,998
Heading over to DFS now,
make sure he got all the paperwork in.
676
00:51:20,200 --> 00:51:21,395
What's with the asparagus?
677
00:51:21,640 --> 00:51:24,758
Know how Popeye gets all big and strong
when he eats his spinach?
678
00:51:24,960 --> 00:51:27,919
That's what asparagus does for sperm.
679
00:51:28,320 --> 00:51:29,356
Hmm.
680
00:51:35,720 --> 00:51:37,791
- You again.
- Me again.
681
00:51:38,000 --> 00:51:41,471
Just wanted to make sure Frank showed up
and all our paperwork was good.
682
00:51:41,680 --> 00:51:44,400
He did. He passed his urine test
with flying colors.
683
00:51:44,600 --> 00:51:47,513
And, yes, your paperwork is all set.
684
00:51:47,720 --> 00:51:51,031
So now we just wait for a hearing?
685
00:51:52,680 --> 00:51:54,831
You've done good, Fiona.
686
00:51:55,040 --> 00:51:59,273
You are a great sister
and those kids are lucky to have you.
687
00:52:05,400 --> 00:52:08,199
How did we show up on DFS radar?
688
00:52:08,400 --> 00:52:12,314
It was an anonymous phone call, actually.
689
00:52:12,560 --> 00:52:15,837
Bet it was that bitch we turned away
from daycare because her kid stunk.
690
00:52:16,040 --> 00:52:18,555
Um, no.
691
00:52:20,000 --> 00:52:23,152
- It was a man, actually.
- A man?
692
00:52:23,800 --> 00:52:27,077
It's never a man.
Men don't give a shit.
693
00:52:28,080 --> 00:52:31,676
How is it fair that someone can make a call
and completely ruin our lives...
694
00:52:31,880 --> 00:52:34,520
...and they get to be anonymous?
695
00:52:37,440 --> 00:52:38,954
I have to go to the restroom.
696
00:52:39,160 --> 00:52:42,710
I'd appreciate it if you didn't click
on this file while I'm gone.
697
00:53:06,040 --> 00:53:12,719
Yes, hello,
I would like to report a negligent situation.
698
00:53:12,920 --> 00:53:16,470
2119 North Wallace.
Gallagher.
699
00:53:16,680 --> 00:53:18,160
And what's the situation?
700
00:53:18,360 --> 00:53:23,355
Six kids living in squalor.
No parental supervision.
701
00:53:23,560 --> 00:53:28,476
When the father is there, he's drunk.
He hits them.
702
00:53:28,720 --> 00:53:34,034
Not that they don't deserve it.
They're all criminals, delinquents, vile--
703
00:53:34,240 --> 00:53:37,472
Excuse me, sir.
Could you give me your name, please?
704
00:53:37,680 --> 00:53:40,070
I would like to remain anonymous.
705
00:53:40,320 --> 00:53:42,198
Thanks for bringing this to our attention.
706
00:53:42,440 --> 00:53:46,798
No, thank you, and God bless you.
58912
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.