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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,295 --> 00:00:07,715 Oh, man. You guys missed a great party last week. 2 00:00:11,511 --> 00:00:14,221 - Say hello to your new foster family. - You're one of five wives? 3 00:00:14,389 --> 00:00:16,432 - Married to a dude named Clyde? - Who's 65? 4 00:00:16,599 --> 00:00:18,767 Would it be all right if my son Jonah came to visit? 5 00:00:18,935 --> 00:00:21,562 Keep laughing. I will slit your throat while you sleep. 6 00:00:21,730 --> 00:00:24,898 - Shoplifting is out of hand. - You have to stand up to him. 7 00:00:25,066 --> 00:00:26,775 Tried that once with his father. 8 00:00:26,943 --> 00:00:29,403 No, hold it like you wanna do something with it. 9 00:00:29,571 --> 00:00:32,448 - Again? - What was I supposed to do? Shoot? 10 00:00:32,615 --> 00:00:35,534 No touching the forbidden fruit until I'm knocked up. 11 00:00:35,702 --> 00:00:37,161 Slept with someone. Not Kash. 12 00:00:37,370 --> 00:00:39,288 - This was like a booty call. - Whatever. 13 00:00:39,456 --> 00:00:42,875 Steve got a text from Candace. Is he dating someone else? 14 00:00:43,043 --> 00:00:44,460 Who the fuck is Candace? 15 00:00:44,627 --> 00:00:46,420 We work together. That's all. 16 00:00:46,588 --> 00:00:48,547 - I'm home. - Little brother! 17 00:00:49,132 --> 00:00:50,466 Hey, you. 18 00:00:50,925 --> 00:00:52,384 Mm. 19 00:02:07,544 --> 00:02:09,044 Okay, but you gotta promise. 20 00:02:09,212 --> 00:02:12,714 Okay, I promise. I won't tell Fiona. Now, whose house is this? 21 00:02:12,882 --> 00:02:14,216 I'm not sure. 22 00:02:15,218 --> 00:02:17,219 What the hell are we doing here? 23 00:02:17,387 --> 00:02:19,555 Trying to find out if Steve's cheating. 24 00:02:19,722 --> 00:02:20,848 What? 25 00:02:21,015 --> 00:02:23,725 Tell me that's not a woman's car parked out front. 26 00:02:26,896 --> 00:02:28,730 Fiona is a big girl. 27 00:02:28,898 --> 00:02:32,067 Fiona takes care of everyone, but no one takes care of Fiona. 28 00:02:32,235 --> 00:02:36,071 Is this about Candace? Because Fiona knows about Candace. 29 00:02:36,239 --> 00:02:39,533 She won't do anything. Too proud. So we have to. 30 00:02:40,285 --> 00:02:41,994 You're a sweet kid, Debs. 31 00:02:50,253 --> 00:02:51,461 Hey, bounce, come on 32 00:02:51,629 --> 00:02:54,298 Bounce, come on Bounce, come on, bounce 33 00:02:54,465 --> 00:02:56,175 Everybody, just bounce, come on 34 00:02:56,342 --> 00:02:58,468 Bounce, come on Bounce, come on 35 00:02:58,636 --> 00:03:00,262 Bounce, bounce 36 00:03:00,847 --> 00:03:05,058 I've just got this feeling About to lose control 37 00:03:05,268 --> 00:03:09,229 Did you purposefully order a Sex on the Beach so I'd say it to the gay bartender? 38 00:03:09,397 --> 00:03:12,065 Maybe. Maybe I was hoping you'd actually take me away... 39 00:03:12,233 --> 00:03:13,901 ...so we could have sex on a beach. 40 00:03:14,068 --> 00:03:16,570 I could barely get you overnight in a local hotel. 41 00:03:16,738 --> 00:03:18,572 Well, that was then. This is now. 42 00:03:18,740 --> 00:03:21,617 I just feel like I haven't seen a lot of you lately. 43 00:03:22,660 --> 00:03:24,912 You mean that you'd like to see more of me? 44 00:03:26,456 --> 00:03:29,166 Yes. I guess that's what I'm saying. 45 00:03:33,254 --> 00:03:35,297 Usually by this time in a relationship... 46 00:03:35,465 --> 00:03:39,426 ...guy starts just showing up for booty calls, or wants me to meet his mother. 47 00:03:39,594 --> 00:03:41,887 Either way, I start looking for reasons to walk. 48 00:03:42,055 --> 00:03:44,723 Well, my mom is in Michigan, so you don't have to worry. 49 00:03:44,891 --> 00:03:48,143 I think that's the first time you've ever mentioned your family. 50 00:03:48,311 --> 00:03:49,811 Really? 51 00:03:50,521 --> 00:03:52,689 Not much to say. I mean... 52 00:03:52,857 --> 00:03:54,942 ...they live in Michigan. 53 00:03:55,109 --> 00:03:56,318 The whole state? 54 00:03:56,486 --> 00:03:57,611 No. Near Detroit. 55 00:03:57,779 --> 00:04:01,323 Uh, Dad used to work for GM, so I try to send back what I can to help. 56 00:04:01,491 --> 00:04:04,993 Family business. He builds them. You steal them. 57 00:04:05,870 --> 00:04:06,912 Come on, let's dance. 58 00:04:10,250 --> 00:04:12,125 Come on. 59 00:04:16,339 --> 00:04:19,091 Liam is officially asleep. 60 00:04:19,259 --> 00:04:20,342 That was fast. 61 00:04:20,510 --> 00:04:24,263 Yeah, well, three pages from Deb's Eat Pray Love and he's out. 62 00:04:24,430 --> 00:04:27,516 If James Franco wasn't in the movie, I would've nodded off too. 63 00:04:29,769 --> 00:04:33,355 You got any cash you can float me? Florence and the Machine are playing... 64 00:04:33,523 --> 00:04:36,441 ...the Chicago Theatre. I wanna take Karen for her birthday. 65 00:04:36,609 --> 00:04:39,528 Pricey gift. Things getting serious? 66 00:04:39,696 --> 00:04:42,489 Fuck off. She's my best friend. 67 00:04:42,657 --> 00:04:46,243 Okay? You know I never spend that kind of cash on a girl anyway. 68 00:04:46,703 --> 00:04:49,663 All right. Well, I got a Hamilton. It's yours. 69 00:04:49,831 --> 00:04:51,123 Thanks, man. 70 00:04:53,501 --> 00:04:55,210 One, two, three. 71 00:04:57,130 --> 00:04:59,923 God bless Jonah, my sweet baby boy. 72 00:05:00,091 --> 00:05:01,675 And God bless my husband, Clyde. 73 00:05:01,843 --> 00:05:05,512 May those caring for him remind him to take his blood-pressure supplement... 74 00:05:05,680 --> 00:05:07,973 ...and his glucosamine chondroitin supplement... 75 00:05:08,141 --> 00:05:11,226 ...so that he can bend down to pick up our child. 76 00:05:11,394 --> 00:05:14,187 God bless the other wives who are on their knees now... 77 00:05:14,355 --> 00:05:18,108 ...asking you to bless me. - Separated from her kid. Gotta suck. 78 00:05:18,276 --> 00:05:21,111 Hopefully, the visit with him tomorrow will cheer her up. 79 00:05:21,279 --> 00:05:24,698 I'm kind of excited about it. Having a full house. Two kids. 80 00:05:24,866 --> 00:05:28,827 Don't get too excited. It's only temporary. 81 00:05:29,412 --> 00:05:30,454 Temporary, Kevin. 82 00:05:30,621 --> 00:05:31,705 - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Mm-hm. 83 00:05:31,873 --> 00:05:34,374 Are you gonna put those in my ass? I'm not even gonna feel it. 84 00:05:34,542 --> 00:05:36,918 They're earplugs, babe. And they're for her. 85 00:05:38,921 --> 00:05:41,006 That would have sucked, trying to fish those out. 86 00:05:57,940 --> 00:06:00,859 Hey. 87 00:06:01,027 --> 00:06:04,112 Wakey, wakey, Jackie Chan. 88 00:06:09,911 --> 00:06:12,120 Who the fuck are you? 89 00:06:12,955 --> 00:06:14,373 I'm Frank. 90 00:06:16,209 --> 00:06:18,126 Oh, my God. 91 00:06:18,294 --> 00:06:19,878 Did we? 92 00:06:23,341 --> 00:06:25,884 Oh, now, now. 93 00:06:28,221 --> 00:06:30,305 Chins up. 94 00:06:44,320 --> 00:06:46,071 Fuck off. 95 00:06:46,239 --> 00:06:48,407 How'd you know it was me? 96 00:06:48,574 --> 00:06:52,744 I was talking to my Promise Makers group and I want you to know... 97 00:06:52,912 --> 00:06:58,708 ...that I understand that so much of your bad behavior is my responsibility. 98 00:06:59,335 --> 00:07:02,421 If you leave a dog in the house alone for more than eight hours... 99 00:07:02,588 --> 00:07:05,507 ...you can't get mad at him for peeing the rug, right? 100 00:07:07,135 --> 00:07:10,679 I found this in an album in the basement. 101 00:07:12,890 --> 00:07:14,933 I don't know. 102 00:07:15,685 --> 00:07:21,440 Maybe we can try to capture more moments like these together. 103 00:07:33,870 --> 00:07:37,038 Why is it that I feel like you can't get away from me fast enough? 104 00:07:37,457 --> 00:07:41,168 - Ha-ha-ha! - Because you're paranoid. 105 00:07:41,961 --> 00:07:44,671 What happened to that computer class you were gonna take? 106 00:07:44,839 --> 00:07:47,591 They canceled it. Not enough people, I guess. 107 00:07:47,758 --> 00:07:50,218 Liam's gonna be up. I gotta get him fed and dressed... 108 00:07:50,386 --> 00:07:55,056 ...and to the clinic for some shots. Don't tell Jenny McCarthy. 109 00:07:55,224 --> 00:07:56,308 Hey, Debs. 110 00:07:56,476 --> 00:07:57,684 Steve. 111 00:07:58,603 --> 00:08:00,520 Liam up yet? 112 00:08:00,688 --> 00:08:05,192 Squawking a little. So everything cool with, uh, you and Steve? 113 00:08:05,359 --> 00:08:06,693 What? Why? 114 00:08:06,861 --> 00:08:09,112 No reason. I'm just checking in. 115 00:08:20,666 --> 00:08:24,419 Hi, baby bottoms. Did you have sweet dreams? 116 00:08:24,587 --> 00:08:26,463 I thought I was baby bottoms. 117 00:08:26,631 --> 00:08:29,674 No, I said you have a baby bottom. 118 00:08:29,842 --> 00:08:32,969 I swore I would never date a guy whose ass was smaller than mine. 119 00:08:33,137 --> 00:08:37,474 But I seem to be breaking a lot of my own rules lately, don't I? Don't I? 120 00:08:37,642 --> 00:08:39,601 He's assuming that was rhetorical. 121 00:08:40,937 --> 00:08:43,688 Hey, you wanna come by tonight after Liam's down? 122 00:08:43,856 --> 00:08:45,941 V gave me a copy of Queen of Outer Space. 123 00:08:46,108 --> 00:08:48,193 Zsa Zsa Gabor at her finest. 124 00:08:48,361 --> 00:08:50,779 We could watch it. And not watch it. 125 00:08:50,947 --> 00:08:53,406 - I gotta go to work. - Okay. 126 00:08:53,574 --> 00:08:56,284 Mm. Ahh. 127 00:08:57,245 --> 00:08:58,537 Hey, Steve. 128 00:09:01,165 --> 00:09:02,374 Debs, breakfast? 129 00:09:02,542 --> 00:09:03,959 I'm good. 130 00:09:06,254 --> 00:09:09,589 - Breakfast! - Hey, can I get a ride to the library? 131 00:09:09,757 --> 00:09:11,424 Motorcycle. No can do. 132 00:09:11,592 --> 00:09:13,802 - When did you get a motorcycle? - Always had one. 133 00:09:13,970 --> 00:09:16,096 I guess there's a lot I don't know about you. 134 00:09:16,264 --> 00:09:20,225 Truth? I'm in the CIA and this is all just a cover. 135 00:09:26,899 --> 00:09:28,066 Any calls, Kate? 136 00:09:28,234 --> 00:09:32,904 Yeah, actually, some A-hole was looking for you. Left this number. 137 00:09:33,072 --> 00:09:34,447 Hand me the phone, will you? 138 00:09:34,615 --> 00:09:38,243 Your tab is bigger than my ass and you smell like kimchi and vomit. 139 00:09:38,411 --> 00:09:42,038 Now, stop that. Your ass looks great. 140 00:09:42,206 --> 00:09:44,291 Like you in the sack, make it quick. 141 00:09:44,458 --> 00:09:46,501 I wasn't quick. I was just busy that day. 142 00:09:51,591 --> 00:09:52,632 Hello. 143 00:09:52,800 --> 00:09:55,427 Yes. I have Frank Gallagher calling. 144 00:09:55,595 --> 00:09:58,013 Hey, Frankie. Got great news. 145 00:09:58,180 --> 00:10:00,140 Who the fuck is this? 146 00:10:00,308 --> 00:10:01,808 Your settlement is in. 147 00:10:01,976 --> 00:10:03,727 Yeah. Which one? 148 00:10:03,894 --> 00:10:05,812 Yeah. Come see me. I'll give you the 411. 149 00:10:07,732 --> 00:10:11,484 Hey, everybody, next round's on me. 150 00:10:15,698 --> 00:10:18,491 Kev. Veronica. 151 00:10:18,659 --> 00:10:20,827 Didn't you just clean that yesterday? 152 00:10:20,995 --> 00:10:24,456 Child Protective Services is bringing my baby, Jonah, for a visit. 153 00:10:24,624 --> 00:10:27,417 Everything has to be just so. 154 00:10:27,585 --> 00:10:29,919 You're so lucky you have a baby. 155 00:10:30,087 --> 00:10:31,421 How old are you? 156 00:10:31,589 --> 00:10:33,548 Ten and a quarter. 157 00:10:33,841 --> 00:10:36,384 Two more years and you'll be old enough to start trying. 158 00:10:38,346 --> 00:10:39,554 Does it hurt? 159 00:10:39,722 --> 00:10:41,890 Sexual relations or childbirth? 160 00:10:42,058 --> 00:10:43,058 Both. 161 00:10:43,225 --> 00:10:44,893 Yes. 162 00:10:46,228 --> 00:10:48,188 He's such a douche bag. 163 00:10:48,356 --> 00:10:50,815 He's on this whole father-daughter purity-ball kick. 164 00:10:51,817 --> 00:10:53,068 Fuck! 165 00:10:53,235 --> 00:10:55,737 He wants me to take a vow of celibacy... 166 00:10:55,905 --> 00:10:58,615 ...so we can rekindle our father-daughter relationship. 167 00:10:58,783 --> 00:11:01,326 Maybe we could not talk about your father right now. 168 00:11:01,494 --> 00:11:03,328 Not what you had in mind for dirty talk? 169 00:11:03,496 --> 00:11:05,080 Not exactly, no. Unh! 170 00:11:07,124 --> 00:11:08,249 Fuck! 171 00:11:09,669 --> 00:11:11,086 Oh, shit! 172 00:11:11,253 --> 00:11:12,587 Shh! Carl's right outside. Shh! 173 00:11:12,755 --> 00:11:15,256 - Oh, fuck! Fuck! - Fuck. 174 00:11:15,424 --> 00:11:17,258 Oh, shit! Oh! 175 00:11:17,426 --> 00:11:21,012 - Shh! Shit! - Keep going! 176 00:11:26,602 --> 00:11:29,354 Yes. Shatterproof, my ass. 177 00:11:39,782 --> 00:11:43,618 Wanna go to the planetarium tonight and get high? 178 00:11:43,786 --> 00:11:45,620 I can't. I'm busy. 179 00:11:45,788 --> 00:11:49,457 - Doing what? Danielle? - Less you know, the better. 180 00:11:51,210 --> 00:11:53,086 Are we still on for Friday night? 181 00:11:53,254 --> 00:11:54,671 Yeah. 182 00:11:55,548 --> 00:11:57,632 Can you give me a hint? 183 00:11:57,800 --> 00:12:00,468 Yeah, but not gonna. 184 00:12:06,809 --> 00:12:08,059 Aha. 185 00:12:08,227 --> 00:12:10,478 Crucial Confrontations. 186 00:12:11,814 --> 00:12:13,440 Haven't seen you here in a while. 187 00:12:13,607 --> 00:12:15,316 Been kind of busy, Simon. 188 00:12:15,484 --> 00:12:17,777 I got a signed first edition of Harry Potter. 189 00:12:17,945 --> 00:12:20,447 Overrated. Made a better movie than a book. 190 00:12:20,614 --> 00:12:22,782 And now with all those kid actors grown up... 191 00:12:22,950 --> 00:12:25,577 ...they're scarier looking than the villains. 192 00:12:26,871 --> 00:12:28,663 Hey, can you help me on the computers? 193 00:12:29,206 --> 00:12:30,248 What do you wanna do? 194 00:12:30,416 --> 00:12:31,833 Dig up some dirt. 195 00:12:32,001 --> 00:12:33,251 Name? 196 00:12:33,419 --> 00:12:36,463 Steve. Wilson? Wilton? 197 00:12:36,630 --> 00:12:39,299 You need to know what the name is before you can look it up. 198 00:12:39,467 --> 00:12:42,135 Try "Wilton." In Lake Forest. 199 00:12:46,140 --> 00:12:49,601 There are zero in Illinois, but there are 15 of them nationwide. 200 00:12:49,769 --> 00:12:51,436 - Can you do it backwards? - "Notliw"? 201 00:12:51,604 --> 00:12:54,939 No, I mean, if I give you an address, can you work from there? 202 00:12:55,691 --> 00:13:00,695 Hey, um, maybe sometime we could just casually hang out. 203 00:13:00,863 --> 00:13:03,198 Fine. Fine, yes. We can casually hang out. 204 00:13:03,365 --> 00:13:05,700 1055 North Ave. 205 00:13:06,494 --> 00:13:10,914 Says the property owners are Lloyd and Candace Lishman. 206 00:13:11,123 --> 00:13:12,999 Hello, Ms. D-Lish. 207 00:13:13,167 --> 00:13:16,336 - Cool. Then we can hang out sometime? - We just did. 208 00:13:27,223 --> 00:13:29,098 She opened an ING Direct savings account. 209 00:13:29,266 --> 00:13:32,644 Hasn't kept any large bills in there for months. Believe me, I've looked. 210 00:13:32,812 --> 00:13:35,605 - You know where she is? - No idea. How much you need? 211 00:13:35,773 --> 00:13:37,941 - Gotta buy concert tickets. - Yikes. 212 00:13:38,108 --> 00:13:41,528 Wish I had it. Maybe you should take Mrs. Niedereiter up on her offer. 213 00:13:45,241 --> 00:13:47,283 Well, that should do it, Mrs. Niedereiter. 214 00:13:50,621 --> 00:13:52,705 There are a lot of dark corners around my house... 215 00:13:52,873 --> 00:13:55,667 ...that could use some attention, Phillip. 216 00:13:59,171 --> 00:14:01,923 - Thanks for the idea. - You're not seriously gonna do it? 217 00:14:02,091 --> 00:14:03,925 - Mommy. - No. 218 00:14:04,093 --> 00:14:06,052 But I could smash her birdhouse again. 219 00:14:08,180 --> 00:14:09,514 Hey... 220 00:14:10,057 --> 00:14:11,933 ...what do you think of Steve? 221 00:14:12,101 --> 00:14:14,769 Ass is kind of small. Not really my type. 222 00:14:16,647 --> 00:14:19,107 You about to retreat and count your wounded? 223 00:14:19,275 --> 00:14:21,276 No, just... 224 00:14:21,443 --> 00:14:23,444 I just wanna know if I should trust him. 225 00:14:23,612 --> 00:14:26,823 That's like asking if you should believe in God. 226 00:14:30,411 --> 00:14:31,452 Just be yourself. 227 00:14:31,954 --> 00:14:34,455 Okay. Okay. 228 00:14:34,623 --> 00:14:36,875 Here we go. 229 00:14:39,211 --> 00:14:40,670 Hi. Come in. 230 00:14:40,838 --> 00:14:45,049 Jonah, baby! Mama missed you so much. 231 00:14:47,136 --> 00:14:49,846 Hi, baby. Hi. 232 00:14:50,806 --> 00:14:52,390 Good afternoon. 233 00:14:52,558 --> 00:14:53,600 - I'm Kev. Mm-hm. 234 00:14:53,767 --> 00:14:55,894 This is my wife, Veronica. 235 00:14:56,061 --> 00:14:58,771 Hello. Good afternoon. 236 00:14:58,939 --> 00:15:02,609 How you doing? I'm Andréa Johnson from DCFS... 237 00:15:02,776 --> 00:15:04,736 ...and I'm here to observe the home visit today. 238 00:15:04,904 --> 00:15:08,781 So if everything go good, then baby Jonah may stay overnight. 239 00:15:08,949 --> 00:15:10,992 Is your voice dressed up for Halloween? 240 00:15:11,160 --> 00:15:12,785 Excuse me? 241 00:15:12,953 --> 00:15:14,996 Think we don't know how to, ha-ha-ha, raise a child? 242 00:15:15,164 --> 00:15:18,166 Come tell me I don't know how to be a mother? 243 00:15:18,334 --> 00:15:20,418 Uh, you got it wrong, sister girl. 244 00:15:20,586 --> 00:15:23,504 I'm here to see how Ethel mothers, not you. 245 00:15:23,672 --> 00:15:25,673 What do you mean? Oh, please. Have a seat. 246 00:15:25,841 --> 00:15:29,802 That girl is only 13 years old, but she's still got her parental rights. 247 00:15:29,970 --> 00:15:33,014 I need to make sure the child can handle the child. You feel me? 248 00:15:33,182 --> 00:15:36,059 Mm-hm. - Yeah. I feel you. 249 00:15:37,645 --> 00:15:41,314 Oh, baby Jonah. Look at you. 250 00:15:41,482 --> 00:15:43,566 You're hung like a little bear, aren't you? 251 00:15:45,152 --> 00:15:46,611 Hey, Andrea? 252 00:15:46,779 --> 00:15:47,820 - Andréa. - Andréa. 253 00:15:47,988 --> 00:15:52,075 You think we could apply to get baby Jonah as a foster kid too? 254 00:15:52,284 --> 00:15:54,369 That's gonna be a crap load of paperwork... 255 00:15:54,536 --> 00:15:57,997 ...but we do encourage keeping family members together. 256 00:15:58,165 --> 00:15:59,499 Yay! 257 00:16:06,507 --> 00:16:08,132 All right, then. 258 00:16:08,300 --> 00:16:11,552 Uh, Eddie's just down in the basement. He'll be right up. 259 00:16:11,720 --> 00:16:15,431 And, of course, you will all get your shoes back when you go, so don't worry. 260 00:16:15,599 --> 00:16:18,059 It'd be great if mine came back shined. 261 00:16:21,063 --> 00:16:23,439 That would be great. 262 00:16:26,568 --> 00:16:28,194 But at last came a knock 263 00:16:28,362 --> 00:16:32,573 And I thought of the door With no lock to lock. 264 00:16:33,283 --> 00:16:36,744 Robert Frost. I was a poetry major in college. 265 00:16:38,247 --> 00:16:40,790 - If you'll open your Bibles to Psalms... - Oh, sweetie. 266 00:16:40,958 --> 00:16:44,585 - 127 verses three to five. - Okay. Um... 267 00:16:44,753 --> 00:16:46,921 "Children are a heritage of the Lord..." 268 00:16:47,089 --> 00:16:49,090 You guys? Okay. 269 00:16:49,258 --> 00:16:50,883 Oh, sweetie. 270 00:16:52,052 --> 00:16:53,803 Oh! 271 00:16:53,971 --> 00:16:56,097 Oh, you are ripe. 272 00:16:56,265 --> 00:16:59,517 Nothing a little Puerto Rican bath can't fix. 273 00:16:59,685 --> 00:17:01,894 Honey. Where were you last night? 274 00:17:02,062 --> 00:17:04,272 I had to spend the night with the kids. 275 00:17:04,440 --> 00:17:06,607 - They needed a little Frankie time. - Oh. 276 00:17:06,775 --> 00:17:09,902 You're such a good dad. Ha-ha-ha. 277 00:17:10,070 --> 00:17:11,195 Oh! Uh-oh. Uh-oh. 278 00:17:11,363 --> 00:17:14,282 Sorry, folks, I had a little plumbing issue. 279 00:17:14,450 --> 00:17:16,034 The house is not mine. 280 00:17:55,365 --> 00:17:57,950 - Lou? - Frankie boy. How's it hanging? 281 00:17:58,118 --> 00:18:00,119 Still from the left. Where the hell are you? 282 00:18:00,287 --> 00:18:02,747 Jesus, it's hard to take a piss with this thing on. 283 00:18:02,915 --> 00:18:05,166 That's a lie. It was the wiping that was tough. 284 00:18:05,334 --> 00:18:07,335 This from the escalator thing at the mall? 285 00:18:07,503 --> 00:18:11,089 No, no, no. This is the train doors closing on your ankle. 286 00:18:11,256 --> 00:18:14,342 - Right. I haven't been the same since. - Yeah. 287 00:18:14,510 --> 00:18:19,555 All I need is your signature and Monica's, and the money is all yours. 288 00:18:19,723 --> 00:18:22,600 With the exception of a third of it. It goes to me. 289 00:18:22,768 --> 00:18:24,602 Plus expenses. 290 00:18:24,770 --> 00:18:26,479 Sounds fair. 291 00:18:26,647 --> 00:18:28,314 Me. 292 00:18:28,482 --> 00:18:29,899 And Monica. 293 00:18:30,067 --> 00:18:34,862 Yay. That was a hell of a warm-up. Unfortunately, those aren't the originals. 294 00:18:35,030 --> 00:18:38,658 You two will have to go down to the city legal offices and do it in person. 295 00:18:38,826 --> 00:18:42,245 What? I'm supposed to take off work to go do this? 296 00:18:42,412 --> 00:18:44,747 Of course not, because, as you know... 297 00:18:44,915 --> 00:18:47,375 ...this injury's prevented you from working, remember? 298 00:18:47,543 --> 00:18:49,001 Oh, shit. 299 00:18:50,838 --> 00:18:52,046 Hey, look at that. 300 00:18:52,214 --> 00:18:54,298 Client just went into labor. 301 00:18:54,758 --> 00:18:57,218 Is that gonna be a problem? Getting Monica to sign? 302 00:18:57,386 --> 00:18:59,053 No. Why would it be a problem? 303 00:18:59,221 --> 00:19:02,932 Well, if memory serves, she was a summa cum laude cunt. 304 00:19:03,100 --> 00:19:05,393 Yeah, well, she was a lot of things. 305 00:19:05,561 --> 00:19:06,853 You even know where she is? 306 00:19:07,020 --> 00:19:10,481 - I have a phone number. I'll make it happen. - Uh-huh. I hope so. 307 00:19:10,649 --> 00:19:13,317 She's a joint claimant on this thing. No Monica, no money. 308 00:19:13,485 --> 00:19:15,695 Do me a favor. Feed the dogs before you go? 309 00:19:15,863 --> 00:19:18,406 Bag of dog food in my desk drawer. Thanks, buddy. 310 00:19:18,574 --> 00:19:20,366 Yeah. 311 00:19:30,169 --> 00:19:31,502 Mm! 312 00:19:31,670 --> 00:19:34,172 All right. Come on. 313 00:19:34,339 --> 00:19:35,590 Get off of her. 314 00:19:36,508 --> 00:19:40,011 Hey, man. It's Lip. I'm calling you from a phone booth. 315 00:19:40,179 --> 00:19:44,098 Just hit me back at whatever number comes up on your cell. It's important. 316 00:19:52,524 --> 00:19:55,067 Thanks for taking long enough to let me enjoy the scent of urine. 317 00:19:55,235 --> 00:19:57,361 I didn't know phone booths existed anymore. 318 00:19:57,529 --> 00:19:58,946 What's up? Sounded urgent. 319 00:19:59,114 --> 00:20:02,783 Yeah. I was just wondering. You, uh...? 320 00:20:02,951 --> 00:20:07,538 - You think you can loan me a couple bills? - I can pay you for a job. 321 00:20:07,706 --> 00:20:10,166 - You got a driver's license? - Few of them, yeah. 322 00:20:10,334 --> 00:20:13,002 All right. Meet me by the EL at 11. 323 00:20:18,508 --> 00:20:20,509 Are you screwing my sister's boyfriend? 324 00:20:22,137 --> 00:20:25,223 If you're selling cookies, that's a hell of an opening line. 325 00:20:26,516 --> 00:20:27,767 Do come in. 326 00:20:36,526 --> 00:20:37,735 Can I get you something? 327 00:20:37,903 --> 00:20:40,071 Milk? Soda? 328 00:20:40,948 --> 00:20:43,574 A joint? It's medicinal. 329 00:20:43,742 --> 00:20:46,118 No, thank you, Mrs. Lishman. 330 00:20:46,286 --> 00:20:48,079 How do you know Steve? 331 00:20:48,247 --> 00:20:50,456 Who is Steve? 332 00:20:51,041 --> 00:20:52,875 He's my sister's boyfriend. 333 00:20:53,627 --> 00:20:55,461 How nice. 334 00:20:56,797 --> 00:20:58,005 So he's not pushing it into you? 335 00:21:01,009 --> 00:21:04,512 Hey, Mom, me and Chip are gonna swing by the hospital to see Dad... 336 00:21:04,680 --> 00:21:06,472 ...so you can relax tonight. - Oh! 337 00:21:06,640 --> 00:21:08,975 - Okay? - Thank you, Jimmy. 338 00:21:09,142 --> 00:21:11,394 You take such good care of your Mama Bear. 339 00:21:11,561 --> 00:21:13,229 Mwah! 340 00:21:14,731 --> 00:21:17,817 - Oh! Uh, this is, oh... - Debbie. 341 00:21:17,985 --> 00:21:19,026 Debbie Gallagher. 342 00:21:19,987 --> 00:21:22,822 Nice to meet you. Jimmy. 343 00:21:22,990 --> 00:21:25,324 Jimmy is my youngest. 344 00:21:25,742 --> 00:21:30,121 Top of his class at Michigan in med school. 345 00:21:30,706 --> 00:21:33,749 He is going to be a cardiothoracic surgeon... 346 00:21:33,917 --> 00:21:37,169 ...like his big brother and his daddy. 347 00:21:37,337 --> 00:21:39,338 He has been taking such good care of me... 348 00:21:39,506 --> 00:21:42,758 ...since his father went into the hospital. 349 00:21:42,926 --> 00:21:44,051 A fender bender. 350 00:21:44,219 --> 00:21:45,970 Broke his knee cap. 351 00:21:46,138 --> 00:21:49,557 And you know, doctors make the worst patients. 352 00:21:49,725 --> 00:21:52,977 Would you like to stay for dinner, sweetheart? 353 00:21:53,145 --> 00:21:56,105 Oh, shit. I liked her. 354 00:21:59,985 --> 00:22:03,237 Hello? Hello? 355 00:22:03,405 --> 00:22:05,489 Shit! Shit! 356 00:22:05,657 --> 00:22:07,283 Shit, shit, shit! 357 00:22:08,660 --> 00:22:09,994 Frank? 358 00:22:12,289 --> 00:22:17,335 Frank, I certainly hope you're not pooping in there. It's a closet. 359 00:22:18,253 --> 00:22:19,837 Frank? 360 00:22:25,010 --> 00:22:26,677 You didn't poop in there, did you? 361 00:22:26,845 --> 00:22:30,348 - I was waiting to surprise you. - Oh. 362 00:22:31,350 --> 00:22:32,725 - Surprise! - Aah! 363 00:22:34,519 --> 00:22:36,771 You got me! 364 00:22:37,564 --> 00:22:39,148 Oh, Frankie. 365 00:22:39,316 --> 00:22:40,649 Hey, do me a favor. 366 00:22:41,276 --> 00:22:45,946 Call this number and ask if Monica is there. 367 00:22:46,114 --> 00:22:48,949 And if she is, tell her... 368 00:22:49,284 --> 00:22:51,619 ...congratulations, she's won. 369 00:22:51,787 --> 00:22:53,704 Who's Monica? 370 00:22:54,164 --> 00:22:56,582 - Doesn't matter. - What'd she win? 371 00:22:56,792 --> 00:23:01,087 Uh, I don't know, whatever. A lottery. Something. 372 00:23:01,254 --> 00:23:03,172 - Lottery? - A prize. 373 00:23:03,340 --> 00:23:04,715 A teddy bear. 374 00:23:06,134 --> 00:23:07,176 What for? 375 00:23:07,344 --> 00:23:10,221 Jesus, with the questions already. 376 00:23:10,389 --> 00:23:13,766 Just call. Say it's a teddy bear. And a hundred bucks. 377 00:23:13,934 --> 00:23:17,478 And she has to pick it up. Just say that. 378 00:23:18,605 --> 00:23:20,147 Well... 379 00:23:20,649 --> 00:23:22,691 ...I hope this Monica... 380 00:23:22,859 --> 00:23:25,111 ...whoever she is... 381 00:23:25,278 --> 00:23:29,949 ...worked really hard for this prize. 382 00:23:32,285 --> 00:23:34,245 - Sheils. - I didn't get a teddy bear. 383 00:23:34,413 --> 00:23:38,040 Sheil. Shit. 384 00:23:42,796 --> 00:23:48,008 Hey. 385 00:23:48,176 --> 00:23:50,886 Come on. 386 00:23:54,099 --> 00:23:58,227 She didn't really win a teddy bear. 387 00:23:58,395 --> 00:24:00,271 But you wanna know what? 388 00:24:00,439 --> 00:24:02,648 If I was giving away teddy bears... 389 00:24:02,816 --> 00:24:07,611 ...you would be absolutely top of the list. 390 00:24:26,047 --> 00:24:29,717 If you will do this for me... 391 00:24:29,885 --> 00:24:32,720 ...I will dress up any way you want. 392 00:24:34,139 --> 00:24:36,140 No safety word. 393 00:24:38,185 --> 00:24:39,602 Is this Monica? 394 00:24:42,731 --> 00:24:46,901 Well, hello. This is Sheila from Market Promotions. 395 00:24:47,068 --> 00:24:51,322 Can I ask you where you do all of your grocery shopping? 396 00:24:52,616 --> 00:24:54,825 Well, yes. That's right. 397 00:24:54,993 --> 00:24:59,205 You've won. First prize. Congratulations. 398 00:24:59,623 --> 00:25:01,999 It's $100. 399 00:25:02,167 --> 00:25:03,250 - And a teddy bear. - Yes. 400 00:25:03,418 --> 00:25:05,127 - And... What? - Teddy bear. 401 00:25:05,295 --> 00:25:07,171 - Teddy bear. - And a teddy bear! 402 00:25:07,339 --> 00:25:10,758 And a great big teddy bear. 403 00:25:12,511 --> 00:25:13,552 Hello? 404 00:25:13,720 --> 00:25:15,763 - What? - Yeah. 405 00:25:15,931 --> 00:25:19,308 - She's crying. - Oh, fuck. 406 00:25:19,476 --> 00:25:22,144 Yeah. No, I've never won anything either. 407 00:25:22,312 --> 00:25:23,479 No one cares. 408 00:25:23,647 --> 00:25:27,358 - It's so great. Yeah. I'm thrilled. - Zip it. 409 00:25:27,526 --> 00:25:28,901 I'm thrilled for you. 410 00:25:29,069 --> 00:25:30,277 Get to the fucking point. 411 00:25:30,445 --> 00:25:35,074 Anyway, prizes will be given out at 3:00. 412 00:25:35,659 --> 00:25:37,868 At the store. 413 00:25:38,495 --> 00:25:39,620 Yes. 414 00:25:40,247 --> 00:25:43,749 WGN's own Tom Skilling will be presenting. 415 00:25:43,917 --> 00:25:45,543 What? What? 416 00:25:47,212 --> 00:25:48,671 She doesn't know Tom Skilling. 417 00:25:48,838 --> 00:25:51,173 - I don't know Tom Skilling. - He does the weather. 418 00:25:51,341 --> 00:25:54,218 Tom Skilling does the weather on WGN. 419 00:25:54,386 --> 00:25:56,804 Anyway, 3:00 on the dot. 420 00:25:56,972 --> 00:25:59,348 - Jim Ramsey might be there too. - Oh, Jesus Christ. 421 00:25:59,516 --> 00:26:01,475 - He does weekend weather. Okay. - Hang up. 422 00:26:01,643 --> 00:26:03,644 Congratulations. See you there, Monica. 423 00:26:03,812 --> 00:26:05,563 What did she say? Is she coming? 424 00:26:05,730 --> 00:26:09,525 How can you not know who two of Chicago's weathermen are? 425 00:26:09,693 --> 00:26:11,360 What kind of person is this Monica? 426 00:26:11,528 --> 00:26:14,446 Is she coming to get the fucking prize or not? 427 00:26:14,614 --> 00:26:17,116 Yeah. She... Oh, she's going. 428 00:26:17,284 --> 00:26:20,411 She's excited about that teddy bear. 429 00:26:31,673 --> 00:26:37,344 You know, not sure I can prove it, but I think it's colder on the North Side. 430 00:26:38,555 --> 00:26:40,848 Let me take you home, Debs. 431 00:26:41,016 --> 00:26:43,517 I'm not supposed to take rides from strangers... 432 00:26:43,685 --> 00:26:46,061 ...and it's clear that you are a stranger. 433 00:26:46,688 --> 00:26:48,647 Oh, man. 434 00:26:49,065 --> 00:26:50,941 Are you gonna tell Fiona? 435 00:26:51,109 --> 00:26:53,527 Exactly what am I supposed to tell her? 436 00:26:54,112 --> 00:26:56,071 That your name isn't Steve? 437 00:26:56,239 --> 00:26:58,949 That you have a family in Chicago she's never met? 438 00:26:59,159 --> 00:27:02,453 Or that your mom kisses you on the lips? Which is really gross. 439 00:27:02,621 --> 00:27:04,997 Life gets really complicated when you're an adult. 440 00:27:05,165 --> 00:27:09,209 I mean, you can't possibly understand these things right now. 441 00:27:10,962 --> 00:27:15,007 I understand that you lied to my sister. Why? 442 00:27:15,175 --> 00:27:18,218 Because I was raised by a pack of wolves. 443 00:27:18,803 --> 00:27:21,930 Just like you were. Only my wolves went to Harvard. 444 00:27:22,098 --> 00:27:24,099 They have red wolves at Lincoln Park Zoo. 445 00:27:24,267 --> 00:27:26,852 Maybe we could go check them out sometime. 446 00:27:27,020 --> 00:27:29,730 Trying to distract me by asking me out on a date? 447 00:27:29,898 --> 00:27:33,525 I do not wanna be a doctor. I do not wanna be like the rest of my family. 448 00:27:33,693 --> 00:27:37,821 What I want is Fiona. I love her. 449 00:27:39,449 --> 00:27:42,785 Love is fleeting, Jimmy. What are your intentions? 450 00:27:42,952 --> 00:27:46,914 You're distracting her, and I need her in the game for at least a few more years. 451 00:27:47,666 --> 00:27:51,168 I can't have you breaking her heart or running off with her. 452 00:27:51,336 --> 00:27:55,297 So if you're not serious about sticking around, back off now. 453 00:27:56,216 --> 00:28:00,010 I bought her a house. Is that serious enough? 454 00:28:00,178 --> 00:28:01,595 You what? 455 00:28:02,806 --> 00:28:04,723 Come on. I'll show you. 456 00:28:17,445 --> 00:28:18,570 - Really? - Yeah. 457 00:28:18,738 --> 00:28:20,155 Yes! Yes! 458 00:28:20,323 --> 00:28:21,782 This was Mr. Harris' house. 459 00:28:21,950 --> 00:28:25,619 They said he died of lung cancer, but we're pretty sure it was full-blown AIDS. 460 00:28:28,790 --> 00:28:31,959 Oh, my God! 461 00:28:32,127 --> 00:28:34,920 - Has Fiona seen it? - No, she doesn't know about it yet. 462 00:28:35,088 --> 00:28:38,382 I was gonna fix it up a bit and surprise her when the time is right. 463 00:28:40,135 --> 00:28:42,261 Think we could build an aboveground walkway... 464 00:28:42,429 --> 00:28:43,971 ...that connects the two houses? 465 00:28:44,139 --> 00:28:45,431 What, like a Habitrail tube? 466 00:28:46,099 --> 00:28:48,142 That would be awesome. 467 00:28:49,185 --> 00:28:50,894 Are you gonna tell Fiona? 468 00:28:54,774 --> 00:28:56,567 Don't know yet, Jimmy. 469 00:28:56,735 --> 00:28:59,236 Saw a really cool pink vest at the mall. 470 00:28:59,404 --> 00:29:00,779 Really? 471 00:29:00,947 --> 00:29:03,449 And I could use a new rolling pin and flour sifter. 472 00:29:03,616 --> 00:29:05,909 Sheila's teaching me how to bake. 473 00:29:06,536 --> 00:29:07,619 Anything else? 474 00:29:10,290 --> 00:29:11,749 Not for the moment. 475 00:29:11,916 --> 00:29:15,753 So which room would be mine when I sleep over? 476 00:29:27,015 --> 00:29:30,142 Not going out with that Gallagher degenerate tonight? 477 00:29:31,519 --> 00:29:34,897 Good. You deserve better. 478 00:29:35,064 --> 00:29:37,775 I've been reading more about this purity-ball thing. 479 00:29:37,942 --> 00:29:41,028 It says here you can rededicate yourself as a virgin. 480 00:29:41,196 --> 00:29:43,530 Start over. Isn't that nice? 481 00:29:47,786 --> 00:29:50,704 I mean, you show up, you confess your transgressions... 482 00:29:50,872 --> 00:29:54,833 ...and pledge yourself to be pure again in the eyes of the Lord. 483 00:29:57,128 --> 00:29:58,378 I'll give you the damn car. 484 00:30:00,924 --> 00:30:01,965 Really? 485 00:30:13,186 --> 00:30:16,980 Fiona would be pissed if she knew you were into this shit with me. 486 00:30:17,816 --> 00:30:20,818 Well, what she doesn't know won't hurt her, right? 487 00:30:21,903 --> 00:30:25,405 All right. Task at hand, you'll be driving the follow car. 488 00:30:25,573 --> 00:30:28,075 Golden rule: Always use a follow car. 489 00:30:28,243 --> 00:30:31,912 - Hey, silver Mercedes. - And a security camera at the intersection. 490 00:30:32,080 --> 00:30:34,790 Why don't we head up to some asshole town like Lake Forest? 491 00:30:34,958 --> 00:30:36,375 - Plenty of douche-mobiles. - No. 492 00:30:36,543 --> 00:30:38,252 - I was thinking... - Listen. No. 493 00:30:38,419 --> 00:30:41,088 Two hundred bucks to follow me after I lift the car. 494 00:30:41,256 --> 00:30:44,466 You get your concert tickets, I get my work done. That's it. Okay? 495 00:30:44,634 --> 00:30:45,717 All right, man. 496 00:30:50,348 --> 00:30:52,015 Shit. 497 00:30:52,183 --> 00:30:57,521 Rule number two: Always remember where you parked the follow car. 498 00:31:10,952 --> 00:31:12,536 Fuck. 499 00:31:28,887 --> 00:31:30,804 Monica. 500 00:31:44,903 --> 00:31:45,944 Monica? 501 00:32:05,924 --> 00:32:07,132 Deb. 502 00:32:07,675 --> 00:32:09,343 Jimmy. 503 00:32:09,969 --> 00:32:12,387 Fiona's next door with Liam. 504 00:32:12,805 --> 00:32:14,514 That my shut-up gift? 505 00:32:14,682 --> 00:32:18,018 Well, I like to think of it as a peace offering. 506 00:32:18,186 --> 00:32:21,438 A peace offering implies a one-time thing. 507 00:32:21,606 --> 00:32:24,358 This could take a while. 508 00:32:24,525 --> 00:32:25,817 How long? 509 00:32:26,569 --> 00:32:29,613 Until I'm sure that you're not still lying. 510 00:32:30,615 --> 00:32:31,698 Okay. 511 00:32:31,866 --> 00:32:35,035 I gotta get back up to Lake Forest. They're releasing my dad. 512 00:32:35,203 --> 00:32:39,206 I'm gonna take him home. You know everything there is to know. 513 00:32:39,374 --> 00:32:43,251 No more secrets. I promise. 514 00:32:44,879 --> 00:32:47,339 Sifter sifts and rolling pin rolls. 515 00:32:48,132 --> 00:32:50,384 Nice when things do what they say they will. 516 00:32:57,892 --> 00:32:59,977 - Jimmy. - Steve. 517 00:33:00,144 --> 00:33:02,312 - Is this your idea of a joke? - No, ma'am. 518 00:33:02,480 --> 00:33:04,856 Because you're scared of women with an opinion. 519 00:33:05,024 --> 00:33:06,108 - No. - Yeah? 520 00:33:06,275 --> 00:33:09,903 Yeah? Watch this, crinkle-dick. Oh, yeah, I'll show you what's funny... 521 00:33:10,071 --> 00:33:13,031 ...when I rip your fucking face off your fucking head! 522 00:33:13,199 --> 00:33:16,243 - Bob. Bob. No. No. No. - Out of the way, Monica. 523 00:33:16,411 --> 00:33:18,370 - Get out of my way! Out of the way, now. 524 00:33:18,538 --> 00:33:21,164 Put the shovel down. Let's just leave. 525 00:33:21,332 --> 00:33:23,959 - Just go. - I'm sorry. 526 00:33:24,127 --> 00:33:25,961 Who lies about a teddy bear? 527 00:33:26,587 --> 00:33:29,506 Wasting my fucking time! Are you sure this is the right store? 528 00:33:29,674 --> 00:33:31,758 - Yes! - Did they specifically say this store? 529 00:33:31,926 --> 00:33:35,929 Yes! I told you. Yes. I wrote it down. I wrote everything down. 530 00:33:36,097 --> 00:33:39,099 Stop talking to me like I'm stupid. 531 00:33:46,816 --> 00:33:49,192 Frank? 532 00:33:50,945 --> 00:33:53,113 - Frank! - What? 533 00:33:53,281 --> 00:33:55,699 Frank! 534 00:33:59,954 --> 00:34:01,329 Start the car! 535 00:34:01,497 --> 00:34:03,040 What? 536 00:34:03,416 --> 00:34:05,792 - Go, go, go! - What the fuck, Frank? 537 00:34:05,960 --> 00:34:07,753 - She saw me. - What's going on? 538 00:34:09,422 --> 00:34:11,590 Come on! We gotta get out of here! Go! 539 00:34:19,474 --> 00:34:21,892 I'm gonna rip it off when I catch you! 540 00:34:24,562 --> 00:34:27,814 - Can't this piece of shit go any faster? - No! 541 00:34:28,566 --> 00:34:30,650 Monica's batting for the other team. 542 00:34:30,818 --> 00:34:32,611 - What? - My wife's a lesbian. 543 00:34:32,779 --> 00:34:33,945 Shit! 544 00:34:47,168 --> 00:34:49,294 - No. No. No. - Shut up, Frank. 545 00:34:49,462 --> 00:34:51,088 No. No. 546 00:34:57,595 --> 00:34:59,971 Fuck off, lesbos! 547 00:35:01,516 --> 00:35:06,686 Okay. My advice to you would be to let Fiona live in her own relationship. 548 00:35:06,854 --> 00:35:08,897 You can't do it for her. 549 00:35:09,065 --> 00:35:10,607 There's things she should know. 550 00:35:10,775 --> 00:35:14,277 Well, sometimes, sweetie, when people are in love... 551 00:35:14,445 --> 00:35:17,906 ...they don't tell someone everything for a reason. 552 00:35:18,074 --> 00:35:19,616 That's like lying. 553 00:35:19,784 --> 00:35:24,871 No, sweetie, it's just... It's a little editing. 554 00:35:25,039 --> 00:35:31,503 Now, by sifting, see, we separate and aerate those flour particles... 555 00:35:31,671 --> 00:35:34,840 ...to make them absorb liquids better. 556 00:35:35,007 --> 00:35:37,467 Someone should sift my dad. 557 00:35:37,635 --> 00:35:41,429 Ha, ha. You Gallaghers. You're all so funny. 558 00:35:42,140 --> 00:35:45,851 - Frank! This is bullshit! - Lock the door! Lock the door! 559 00:35:46,018 --> 00:35:48,520 What is happening?! 560 00:35:48,688 --> 00:35:50,480 - It's okay. - I thought we lost them. 561 00:35:50,648 --> 00:35:52,691 Did you even have a plan back there? 562 00:35:52,859 --> 00:35:56,736 I was going to charm her into signing once she was there. 563 00:35:56,904 --> 00:35:59,072 How was I supposed to know she would show up... 564 00:35:59,240 --> 00:36:02,200 ...with ghetto Godzilla in a Peterbilt? 565 00:36:02,368 --> 00:36:05,537 I am seriously this close to punching you in the dick. 566 00:36:18,134 --> 00:36:20,260 Get... They're just girls. 567 00:36:20,428 --> 00:36:22,554 Stop. You talk to them. 568 00:36:22,722 --> 00:36:25,098 I need the key to the back door. 569 00:36:25,266 --> 00:36:28,018 That is not a sexual euphemism. I need the fucking key. 570 00:36:28,186 --> 00:36:29,561 What did you do with it? 571 00:36:29,729 --> 00:36:31,730 I don't know. I can't think when you yell! 572 00:36:31,898 --> 00:36:33,690 I'm not! What did you do with the key? 573 00:36:33,858 --> 00:36:36,818 - You're still yelling. - I need the key, Sheila! 574 00:36:36,986 --> 00:36:40,238 Okay. It's by the... It's by the... It's by the washing machine. 575 00:36:40,406 --> 00:36:42,574 - It's not by the washing machine. - It is. 576 00:36:42,742 --> 00:36:46,036 - I put it by the washing machine. - It's not by... 577 00:36:46,204 --> 00:36:47,662 Mom. 578 00:36:50,082 --> 00:36:52,626 It's Mom. 579 00:37:01,260 --> 00:37:03,261 Debbie. 580 00:37:04,972 --> 00:37:08,099 My sweet pea. 581 00:37:24,158 --> 00:37:27,661 What the fuck are you looking at? 582 00:37:31,916 --> 00:37:33,583 - I got nothing to do with it. - Sit. 583 00:37:33,751 --> 00:37:36,211 - I'm just the driver. - Sit your ass down. 584 00:37:43,302 --> 00:37:48,431 That was a nasty trick. Even for you, Frank. 585 00:37:48,599 --> 00:37:50,850 I had my heart set on that teddy bear. 586 00:37:51,018 --> 00:37:54,688 Poor Monica. Well, what about your kids? 587 00:37:54,855 --> 00:37:57,190 Remember? The six kids? 588 00:37:57,358 --> 00:38:00,151 Youngest was only 2 months old before you ran off... 589 00:38:00,319 --> 00:38:03,029 ...ended up with fucking Shrek here. 590 00:38:03,197 --> 00:38:07,617 - You want me to step in? - No. I didn't leave you, Frank. 591 00:38:07,785 --> 00:38:08,868 Yes, you did. 592 00:38:09,036 --> 00:38:13,373 I didn't choose to leave my family. You almost destroyed me. 593 00:38:13,541 --> 00:38:15,458 When I turned up at Roberta's that night... 594 00:38:15,626 --> 00:38:17,627 - ...I was an emotional cripple. - Emotional cripple. 595 00:38:17,795 --> 00:38:20,046 - With not one ounce of self-respect. - Bullshit. 596 00:38:20,214 --> 00:38:24,509 - I'm gonna start crying. - You drove me into the ground, Frank. 597 00:38:24,677 --> 00:38:31,141 You robbed me of any sense of dignity I ever had and... 598 00:38:32,268 --> 00:38:33,685 Where's the rest of the kids? 599 00:38:33,853 --> 00:38:37,522 - They're out playing. - They live down at Fiona's. 600 00:38:39,942 --> 00:38:41,901 You mind putting some bags on? 601 00:38:42,069 --> 00:38:44,154 Can you put some bags on your feet, please? 602 00:38:44,322 --> 00:38:48,074 - Bags on my feet? - Yeah, I need you to put bags on. 603 00:39:05,384 --> 00:39:08,428 - Don't, don't, don't. - Hell hath no fury like popcorn burned. 604 00:39:08,596 --> 00:39:09,679 All right. 605 00:39:09,847 --> 00:39:11,556 - Steve coming? - Hope so. 606 00:39:11,724 --> 00:39:14,225 Are you guys gonna make a baby while we watch Cosmos? 607 00:39:14,393 --> 00:39:16,186 Because that's gonna make me throw up. 608 00:39:16,354 --> 00:39:19,689 - Billions and billions of sperm. - Ew! 609 00:39:20,649 --> 00:39:25,570 - Can you please turn it on already? - Yeah, hurry up, I gotta get back to work. 610 00:39:25,738 --> 00:39:26,863 Cool. 611 00:39:27,031 --> 00:39:28,448 Shaped our evolution... 612 00:39:28,616 --> 00:39:29,657 Hey. 613 00:39:29,825 --> 00:39:31,576 - And what our fate may be. 614 00:39:31,744 --> 00:39:33,703 - Missed you, stranger. - You too. 615 00:39:36,290 --> 00:39:37,540 Get a room. 616 00:39:37,708 --> 00:39:39,834 - Get your tickets? - Yeah. Thanks. 617 00:39:40,294 --> 00:39:42,045 Glad I could help. 618 00:39:42,213 --> 00:39:43,463 Glad you're glad. 619 00:39:43,631 --> 00:39:44,756 Steve. 620 00:39:44,924 --> 00:39:46,674 Boy. 621 00:39:46,842 --> 00:39:48,718 This popcorn's burnt. 622 00:39:48,886 --> 00:39:50,428 Our microwave sucks. 623 00:39:50,596 --> 00:39:52,889 It doesn't mean I want you to buy us a new one. 624 00:39:53,057 --> 00:39:55,892 Universes smaller than atoms. 625 00:39:56,060 --> 00:39:58,436 - But it's also a story of our own planet... - Debs? 626 00:39:58,604 --> 00:40:00,230 ...and the plants and animals... 627 00:40:00,398 --> 00:40:03,817 - Honey, what happened? - Dad have one too many again? 628 00:40:04,777 --> 00:40:06,903 You just gotta ignore him when he's like that, Debs. 629 00:40:07,822 --> 00:40:09,823 Why do you always blame Dad first? 630 00:40:09,990 --> 00:40:11,241 Who else is there? 631 00:40:13,494 --> 00:40:15,036 She's over at Sheila's. 632 00:40:15,746 --> 00:40:18,123 - Who? - Monica. 633 00:40:18,290 --> 00:40:21,167 Exquisite interrelationships... 634 00:40:21,335 --> 00:40:23,628 ...of the awesome machinery of nature. 635 00:40:24,547 --> 00:40:26,965 - Who the hell is Monica? - Our mother. 636 00:40:27,133 --> 00:40:29,300 Shore of the cosmic ocean. 637 00:40:29,468 --> 00:40:30,677 On this shore... 638 00:40:30,845 --> 00:40:35,306 - Debs, did you s...? - What do you care? 639 00:40:35,474 --> 00:40:39,060 You'll be living with Steve in that house he bought next door. 640 00:40:45,985 --> 00:40:48,319 Surprise. 641 00:40:49,029 --> 00:40:51,823 Because the cosmos is also within us. 642 00:40:51,991 --> 00:40:53,867 We're made of stars. We are... 643 00:40:54,034 --> 00:40:57,537 - I'm going to work. - Ian, come on. Wait. 644 00:41:00,207 --> 00:41:02,876 Mommy. Mommy. 645 00:41:03,043 --> 00:41:04,586 I know. 646 00:41:04,753 --> 00:41:09,299 Mommy. 647 00:41:27,568 --> 00:41:28,693 What the fuck? 648 00:41:28,861 --> 00:41:31,279 - I need to see you. - Not a good time. 649 00:41:31,447 --> 00:41:35,116 Who keeps hanging their fucking laundry on my pull-up bar? 650 00:41:35,284 --> 00:41:37,035 I don't know where else to go. 651 00:41:38,746 --> 00:41:41,080 I thought you were working today. 652 00:41:41,916 --> 00:41:46,002 Linda's gonna have my ass. I'm supposed to be there now. 653 00:41:46,837 --> 00:41:48,588 I'll meet you there in 20. 654 00:41:52,384 --> 00:41:54,219 - Aw, bullshit! - Yes! 655 00:41:54,386 --> 00:41:57,597 - You physically abused me. - What? When? 656 00:41:57,765 --> 00:41:59,849 - That 4th of July. - Oh, come on! 657 00:42:00,017 --> 00:42:02,810 You hit me in the face with a tray of apple pandowdy. 658 00:42:02,978 --> 00:42:04,562 And you hit me back. 659 00:42:04,730 --> 00:42:07,732 Yeah, after you broke my nose and scratched my cornea. 660 00:42:07,900 --> 00:42:09,400 Oh, yeah? What about this? 661 00:42:09,568 --> 00:42:11,402 Oh, come on! You started that one! 662 00:42:11,570 --> 00:42:13,738 And I'll finish it if you lay a finger on her. 663 00:42:13,906 --> 00:42:16,533 - Roberta. - "Bob." Only Moni calls me Roberta. 664 00:42:17,117 --> 00:42:21,204 All right. Well, Bob, perhaps we're just in the way here. 665 00:42:21,372 --> 00:42:27,168 And we should make our exit and leave Monica for her apologies. 666 00:42:27,336 --> 00:42:30,713 Apologies? For walking out on this piece of shit? 667 00:42:30,881 --> 00:42:33,800 No. For walking out on them. 668 00:42:39,890 --> 00:42:42,267 Oh, my God. 669 00:42:42,810 --> 00:42:46,479 It's all right. I'm not one of yours. Just came to rubberneck. 670 00:42:56,490 --> 00:42:58,241 Ian! I did it! 671 00:42:58,409 --> 00:43:01,661 Linda's pregnant! Ian! 672 00:43:01,829 --> 00:43:04,038 Finally knocked her up! Where are you? I did it! 673 00:43:04,623 --> 00:43:06,124 It's over! 674 00:43:14,174 --> 00:43:16,301 What the fuck? 675 00:43:35,154 --> 00:43:36,654 You're all so big. 676 00:43:36,822 --> 00:43:38,448 Thank you. 677 00:43:39,408 --> 00:43:41,951 I missed you so much. 678 00:43:43,787 --> 00:43:45,496 Why didn't you take us with you? 679 00:43:48,542 --> 00:43:50,918 Because... 680 00:43:51,086 --> 00:43:54,047 ...I knew you'd be fine with Fiona. 681 00:44:21,909 --> 00:44:24,243 Fucking right, you keep your mouth shut. 682 00:44:28,457 --> 00:44:29,874 You better keep it shut. 683 00:44:32,086 --> 00:44:33,211 You hear me? 684 00:44:34,505 --> 00:44:36,839 Put the candy back, Mickey. 685 00:44:40,844 --> 00:44:43,638 Mm. That's sweet. 686 00:44:44,139 --> 00:44:46,057 I like them sweet. 687 00:44:47,101 --> 00:44:52,146 But then, uh, so do you, huh? Ha, ha. 688 00:44:52,314 --> 00:44:56,943 Put it back. Now. 689 00:45:00,948 --> 00:45:02,115 Fuck. 690 00:45:03,534 --> 00:45:06,703 - Kash, what are you doing? - It's a fucking Snickers bar. 691 00:45:07,663 --> 00:45:10,248 - Fuck! - Holy shit! 692 00:45:10,874 --> 00:45:14,085 - Jesus Chr... - Okay. 693 00:45:14,253 --> 00:45:15,586 - You okay? - Fuck. 694 00:45:16,880 --> 00:45:20,258 - Hey. Hey. Listen to me. Look at me. - You fucking suck! 695 00:45:27,474 --> 00:45:29,559 I thought you were at work. 696 00:45:30,894 --> 00:45:32,645 There was a shooting. 697 00:45:32,813 --> 00:45:34,230 Mickey and Kash. 698 00:45:34,648 --> 00:45:36,899 Holy shit. Mickey shot Kash? 699 00:45:37,067 --> 00:45:39,277 - Kash shot Mickey. - What? 700 00:45:39,445 --> 00:45:43,656 In the leg. He's fine. Just wanted to get out of there before the cops got there. 701 00:45:43,824 --> 00:45:45,158 Huh. 702 00:45:45,659 --> 00:45:47,744 What'd I miss with Mom? 703 00:45:47,911 --> 00:45:51,414 Well, you know how Dad's a total fucking asshole? 704 00:45:51,582 --> 00:45:52,707 Yeah. 705 00:45:52,875 --> 00:45:55,251 Turns out he's the good one. 706 00:45:55,419 --> 00:45:58,129 I can't believe you sucked me back in here for money. 707 00:45:58,297 --> 00:46:00,590 I did no such thing! 708 00:46:01,341 --> 00:46:04,677 But since you're in town, why don't you sign up for this little thing... 709 00:46:04,845 --> 00:46:07,096 - ...and I'll cut you in. - Fuck you, Frank! 710 00:46:07,264 --> 00:46:08,848 Wait. You brought her back here? 711 00:46:09,975 --> 00:46:11,142 Oh, Ian. 712 00:46:11,310 --> 00:46:13,853 Wait. You knew where she was the whole time? 713 00:46:14,021 --> 00:46:17,231 This little reunion was bound to happen sooner or later, anyway. 714 00:46:17,399 --> 00:46:20,026 We were thinking about coming around to talk to you. 715 00:46:20,194 --> 00:46:22,570 - No, no. Not now. - Yes, now! Yes, now! 716 00:46:22,738 --> 00:46:24,989 Moni and I wanna take Liam to live with us. 717 00:46:25,157 --> 00:46:26,908 - What? - Over my dead body! 718 00:46:27,075 --> 00:46:30,870 How about Moni sign whatever the hell it is you need, we get Liam? 719 00:46:31,038 --> 00:46:32,663 - Done. - No fucking way! 720 00:46:32,831 --> 00:46:34,081 You can't have Liam. 721 00:46:34,249 --> 00:46:36,542 Why the hell not? He's not even Frank's. 722 00:46:36,710 --> 00:46:38,628 Fact is Liam is black. 723 00:46:38,796 --> 00:46:41,047 All you white folks scooping up black babies... 724 00:46:41,215 --> 00:46:44,091 ...like fashion accessories have a rude awakening coming. 725 00:46:44,259 --> 00:46:48,137 No. There will be a backlash if people don't stop underestimating... 726 00:46:48,305 --> 00:46:52,767 ...the cultural importance of a black parent raising a black baby. 727 00:46:52,935 --> 00:46:55,770 Liam needs me and he's coming with us. 728 00:46:55,938 --> 00:46:58,064 No. Out of the fucking question, Roberta. 729 00:46:58,232 --> 00:47:00,733 Roberta and I wanna start a family of our own. 730 00:47:00,901 --> 00:47:02,902 How about you finish this one first? 731 00:47:03,070 --> 00:47:04,445 - Taking Liam? - Yes! 732 00:47:04,613 --> 00:47:09,700 - No. Nobody's taking anyone anywhere. - You don't get to abandon your kids... 733 00:47:09,868 --> 00:47:12,787 ...and then show up one day to take your pick of the litter. 734 00:47:12,955 --> 00:47:14,997 Oh, now, that's not fair. 735 00:47:15,165 --> 00:47:18,084 Your mother's made mistakes, but she's here now. 736 00:47:18,252 --> 00:47:21,796 - That's got to count for something. - Shut up, Frank! 737 00:47:22,172 --> 00:47:24,257 This isn't about you. 738 00:47:24,883 --> 00:47:26,425 This is about you. 739 00:47:26,593 --> 00:47:29,053 This is about what you didn't do. 740 00:47:29,471 --> 00:47:31,013 It's about what I did. 741 00:47:31,181 --> 00:47:35,601 And you know what? I did a fucking great job. 742 00:47:35,769 --> 00:47:37,478 Debbie is class president. 743 00:47:37,646 --> 00:47:40,606 She's on the debate team going to nationals. 744 00:47:40,774 --> 00:47:43,317 And Lip, he's top of his class. 745 00:47:43,485 --> 00:47:45,111 He set the curve. 746 00:47:45,279 --> 00:47:48,865 Ian was promoted in ROTC and he tested out of English. 747 00:47:49,032 --> 00:47:53,786 And Carl made something blow up for his science fair. And you know what? 748 00:47:53,954 --> 00:47:58,124 They did it all, no thanks to you, because you weren't here. 749 00:47:58,625 --> 00:48:03,588 And I appreciate that, Fiona, but I'm here now... 750 00:48:03,755 --> 00:48:07,592 ...and Liam belongs with me. 751 00:48:07,759 --> 00:48:09,927 - He doesn't even know who you are. - I'm his mother! 752 00:48:10,095 --> 00:48:12,138 You were my mother too! 753 00:48:16,643 --> 00:48:18,060 I don't! I don't know! 754 00:48:18,228 --> 00:48:21,647 Maybe I'll never be able to make things right with you... 755 00:48:23,650 --> 00:48:26,152 ...but there's still time with Liam. 756 00:48:27,362 --> 00:48:29,822 And, Debbie and Carl... 757 00:48:29,990 --> 00:48:32,658 ...I am so sorry if I hurt you. 758 00:48:34,161 --> 00:48:37,622 Please. I love you so much. 759 00:48:37,789 --> 00:48:40,416 Please let me be your mommy again. 760 00:48:40,751 --> 00:48:42,376 Please. 761 00:48:48,008 --> 00:48:49,342 Oh! 762 00:48:54,014 --> 00:48:55,222 You know what? 763 00:48:57,392 --> 00:48:58,851 You're right. 764 00:48:59,853 --> 00:49:01,646 You are their mother. 765 00:49:02,189 --> 00:49:05,650 And you're here now, so I'm done. 766 00:49:05,817 --> 00:49:09,862 I'm done with the school and the bills and the clinics. 767 00:49:10,030 --> 00:49:11,614 I'm done. 768 00:49:12,616 --> 00:49:14,909 They're all yours now, Mom. 769 00:49:15,494 --> 00:49:17,328 Good luck. 770 00:49:23,627 --> 00:49:25,336 It's okay. 771 00:49:52,572 --> 00:49:53,990 Come here. 772 00:49:59,162 --> 00:50:00,788 Show me the house? 773 00:50:00,956 --> 00:50:02,331 Yeah. 58103

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