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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:02:29,840 --> 00:02:31,640 You sure Crocker hasn't called? 2 00:02:31,640 --> 00:02:34,600 He was supposed to meet me here a half-hour ago. 3 00:02:34,600 --> 00:02:36,720 Another drink while you're waiting, Mr Whitney? 4 00:02:36,720 --> 00:02:38,080 Please! Seven's my limit. 5 00:02:40,160 --> 00:02:42,320 Hear you're off to England, Mr Whitney. 6 00:02:42,320 --> 00:02:44,080 Big stuff, Fred, the biggest. 7 00:02:44,080 --> 00:02:46,120 Business, huh? Henley Regatta. 8 00:02:46,120 --> 00:02:48,080 Boot the Yale boat home. 9 00:02:48,080 --> 00:02:51,680 Bulldog, Bulldog, bow wow wow. 10 00:02:51,680 --> 00:02:53,920 ♪ Eli Yale! ♪ 11 00:02:53,920 --> 00:02:55,200 Play ball! 12 00:02:55,200 --> 00:02:57,760 Crocker! Where the hell have you been? You're a half hour late. 13 00:02:57,760 --> 00:03:00,080 Relax, bass, I have been taking care of business. 14 00:03:00,080 --> 00:03:02,840 I've got your steamer ticket, English money, train ticket 15 00:03:02,840 --> 00:03:06,760 up to Henley, and I picked Little Eli up at Brooks Brothers. 16 00:03:06,760 --> 00:03:08,960 New letter sweater looks terrific! 17 00:03:08,960 --> 00:03:10,160 Oh! 18 00:03:10,160 --> 00:03:11,240 What about my passport? 19 00:03:11,240 --> 00:03:13,080 Nuts! Oh, I'm sorry, boss. 20 00:03:13,080 --> 00:03:14,840 I'll pick it up first thing in the morning, 21 00:03:14,840 --> 00:03:16,320 and bring it to you down on the boat. 22 00:03:16,320 --> 00:03:18,800 Damn it, Crocker, I want you down on Wall Street first thing 23 00:03:18,800 --> 00:03:20,440 in the morning to sell all my shares... 24 00:03:22,640 --> 00:03:25,560 QUIETER: ..to sell all my shares of Amalgamated Prestoleum. 25 00:03:25,560 --> 00:03:28,560 But boss, the firm's entire assets are tied up in Amalgamated. 26 00:03:28,560 --> 00:03:30,520 I got a hot tip from Charlie Blodgett. 27 00:03:30,520 --> 00:03:33,320 Amalgamated's going to sink like the Titanic. 28 00:03:33,320 --> 00:03:36,120 You always told me Charlie Blodgett was a liar and a drunk. 29 00:03:36,120 --> 00:03:37,480 He is. 30 00:03:37,480 --> 00:03:40,080 But he's a Yale man. 31 00:03:40,080 --> 00:03:41,520 One for the road, sir? 32 00:03:41,520 --> 00:03:43,760 Yeah, make it a double. 33 00:03:43,760 --> 00:03:45,160 Goodnight, gentlemen. 34 00:03:47,760 --> 00:03:50,000 Anybody call for me, Fred? 35 00:03:50,000 --> 00:03:52,560 Yeah, Harriet, Nancy, Lorraine... 36 00:03:52,560 --> 00:03:53,960 Two Lorraines. 37 00:03:53,960 --> 00:03:56,120 How about a Hope? Hope Harcourt? 38 00:03:56,120 --> 00:03:58,600 No, but there was a lady came in asking for you. 39 00:03:58,600 --> 00:04:00,640 He's wrong, Billy. It was only me. 40 00:04:00,640 --> 00:04:02,240 Reno! 41 00:04:05,160 --> 00:04:07,360 Oh, my God. We had a date. 42 00:04:07,360 --> 00:04:09,400 That's OK. I'd say forget it, but you already did. 43 00:04:09,400 --> 00:04:10,720 Reno, I am so sorry. 44 00:04:10,720 --> 00:04:13,320 My boss is going to London first thing in the morning, 45 00:04:13,320 --> 00:04:15,520 I had a thousand things to do for him. 46 00:04:15,520 --> 00:04:16,960 I'M going to London in the morning, 47 00:04:16,960 --> 00:04:18,760 and all you had to do for me was buy me a drink. 48 00:04:18,760 --> 00:04:20,040 What'll it be, ma'am? 49 00:04:20,040 --> 00:04:22,600 A martini, only make it with rye and put a cherry in it 50 00:04:22,600 --> 00:04:24,760 instead of an olive. Yeah, two Manhattans, Fred. 51 00:04:24,760 --> 00:04:27,440 You know, I'm getting worried about you, Billy. 52 00:04:27,440 --> 00:04:29,520 I don't think this Wall Street job is good for you. 53 00:04:29,520 --> 00:04:31,080 Hey, I'm making $35 a week! 54 00:04:31,080 --> 00:04:32,800 Yeah, but look at you. Look at your coat. 55 00:04:32,800 --> 00:04:35,440 What's the matter with my coat? It's got a fried egg on the pocket. 56 00:04:35,440 --> 00:04:36,720 That's an old school crest. 57 00:04:36,720 --> 00:04:38,320 From where? PS 88? 58 00:04:38,320 --> 00:04:39,760 You're in trouble, kid. 59 00:04:39,760 --> 00:04:42,680 If you keep acting like a stuffed shirt stockbroker, 60 00:04:42,680 --> 00:04:45,120 you're going to turn into one. Why do I put up with this, Fred? 61 00:04:45,120 --> 00:04:46,920 You're nuts about me. 62 00:04:46,920 --> 00:04:50,560 In fact, I've got a great idea. 63 00:04:50,560 --> 00:04:52,760 Why don't you come to London with me? 64 00:04:52,760 --> 00:04:54,120 Reno, be serious. 65 00:04:54,120 --> 00:04:56,040 I am serious. 66 00:04:56,040 --> 00:04:58,280 England won't be the same without you. 67 00:04:58,280 --> 00:05:00,760 Nah, guys like me are a dime a dozen. 68 00:05:00,760 --> 00:05:02,400 You won't miss me over there. 69 00:05:04,600 --> 00:05:07,080 Why are the cute ones always so dumb? 70 00:05:09,800 --> 00:05:14,800 ♪ My story is much too sad to be told 71 00:05:14,800 --> 00:05:21,080 ♪ But practically everything leaves me totally cold 72 00:05:23,280 --> 00:05:28,640 ♪ The only exception I know is the case 73 00:05:28,640 --> 00:05:32,000 ♪ When I'm out on a quiet spree 74 00:05:32,000 --> 00:05:35,280 ♪ Fighting vainly the old ennui 75 00:05:35,280 --> 00:05:38,520 ♪ And I suddenly turn and see 76 00:05:40,840 --> 00:05:44,000 ♪ Your fabulous face 77 00:05:46,800 --> 00:05:52,360 ♪ I get no kick from champagne 78 00:05:52,360 --> 00:05:57,320 ♪ Mere alcohol doesn't thrill me at all 79 00:05:57,320 --> 00:06:02,960 ♪ So tell me why should it be true? 80 00:06:02,960 --> 00:06:07,840 ♪ That I get a kick out of you 81 00:06:09,840 --> 00:06:15,400 ♪ Some get a kick from cocaine 82 00:06:15,400 --> 00:06:20,440 ♪ I'm sure that if I took even one sniff 83 00:06:20,440 --> 00:06:26,600 ♪ That would bore me terrifically too 84 00:06:26,600 --> 00:06:31,360 ♪ Yet I get a kick out of you 85 00:06:33,440 --> 00:06:44,840 ♪ I get a kick every time I see you standing there before me 86 00:06:44,840 --> 00:06:49,800 ♪ I get a kick though it's clear to me 87 00:06:49,800 --> 00:06:56,440 ♪ You obviously don't adore me 88 00:06:56,440 --> 00:07:02,400 ♪ I get no kick in a plane 89 00:07:02,400 --> 00:07:07,400 ♪ Flying too high with some guy in the sky 90 00:07:07,400 --> 00:07:12,760 ♪ Is my idea of nothing to do 91 00:07:17,080 --> 00:07:33,040 ♪ Yet I get a kick out of you. ♪ 92 00:07:34,240 --> 00:07:36,520 APPLAUSE 93 00:07:40,840 --> 00:07:43,680 Oh, hell, Reno, there's something I've got to tell you. 94 00:07:43,680 --> 00:07:45,360 Yeah? I'm in love. 95 00:07:45,360 --> 00:07:46,680 I'm in cabin 13. 96 00:07:46,680 --> 00:07:48,880 No, come on, Reno, not with you. 97 00:07:48,880 --> 00:07:50,320 I'm in love with a girl. 98 00:07:50,320 --> 00:07:52,120 God, she's fantastic! 99 00:07:52,120 --> 00:07:54,440 In fact, she is so fantastic she won't even talk to me. 100 00:07:54,440 --> 00:07:57,400 That's why I can't go to London. I've got to stay here... 101 00:07:57,400 --> 00:07:58,720 Oh, so that's it, eh? 102 00:07:58,720 --> 00:08:01,360 All this time, you were just giving me the runaround? 103 00:08:01,360 --> 00:08:02,680 The runaround? 104 00:08:02,680 --> 00:08:04,440 You had me thinking you wanted to marry me! 105 00:08:04,440 --> 00:08:07,360 How could you think that? I always treated you with respect. 106 00:08:07,360 --> 00:08:09,400 Exactly. Did you ever try and get me drunk? 107 00:08:09,400 --> 00:08:11,680 No. Did you invite me up to your apartment 108 00:08:11,680 --> 00:08:13,080 to look at your etchings? 109 00:08:13,080 --> 00:08:14,720 No. We've been any taxi dozens of times, 110 00:08:14,720 --> 00:08:16,000 did you ever once make a pass? 111 00:08:16,000 --> 00:08:17,200 No, not one lousy pass. 112 00:08:17,200 --> 00:08:19,600 You shouldn't have led me on like that if you didn't mean it! 113 00:08:19,600 --> 00:08:21,280 Reno, I never meant to mislead you. 114 00:08:21,280 --> 00:08:23,840 The hell you didn't! You never even laid a hand on me, 115 00:08:23,840 --> 00:08:26,080 and I'm not used to men treating me like that. 116 00:08:43,240 --> 00:08:47,080 ♪ I get no kick in a plane 117 00:08:51,160 --> 00:08:56,600 ♪ Flying too high with some guy in the sky 118 00:08:56,600 --> 00:09:01,880 ♪ Is my idea of nothing to do 119 00:09:07,080 --> 00:09:21,120 ♪ Yet I get a kick out of you. ♪ 120 00:09:31,280 --> 00:09:36,280 ♪ Oh, there's no cure like travel to help you unravel 121 00:09:36,280 --> 00:09:39,440 ♪ The worries of living today 122 00:09:39,440 --> 00:09:42,040 ♪ When the poor brain is cracking 123 00:09:42,040 --> 00:09:43,920 ♪ There's nothing like packing 124 00:09:43,920 --> 00:09:46,960 ♪ A suitcase and sailing away 125 00:09:46,960 --> 00:09:52,520 ♪ Take a run round Vienna, Granada, Ravenna, Siena 126 00:09:52,520 --> 00:09:54,400 ♪ And then around Rome 127 00:09:54,400 --> 00:09:56,520 ♪ Have a high time 128 00:09:56,520 --> 00:09:58,480 ♪ A low time, and in no time 129 00:09:58,480 --> 00:10:02,200 ♪ You'll be singing home, sweet home. ♪ 130 00:10:17,800 --> 00:10:19,280 Excuse me, Captain. 131 00:10:19,280 --> 00:10:20,920 Has a Mr Eli Whitney come aboard? 132 00:10:20,920 --> 00:10:22,560 Mr Whitney is in the bar. 133 00:10:22,560 --> 00:10:24,800 I thought you kept the bar closed till you sailed. 134 00:10:24,800 --> 00:10:28,680 He had a note from his doctor. Oh. Thank you. 135 00:10:28,680 --> 00:10:30,760 Captain, Captain, a catastrophe! 136 00:10:30,760 --> 00:10:32,560 We may have to delay the sailing! 137 00:10:32,560 --> 00:10:33,800 What is it? 138 00:10:33,800 --> 00:10:35,280 Icebergs? A hurricane? 139 00:10:35,280 --> 00:10:36,480 Worse! 140 00:10:36,480 --> 00:10:37,800 Charlie Chaplin just wired. 141 00:10:37,800 --> 00:10:40,600 He's cancelling his berth and sailing on the Mauritania. 142 00:10:40,600 --> 00:10:42,200 Good God! 143 00:10:42,200 --> 00:10:43,920 The passenger list, quick! 144 00:10:46,880 --> 00:10:51,040 Hope Harcourt, the debutante. That's not bad. 145 00:10:51,040 --> 00:10:55,880 The Normandie has Jimmy Walker and Machine Gun Kelly. 146 00:10:55,880 --> 00:10:57,320 Lord Evelyn Oakleigh? 147 00:10:57,320 --> 00:10:59,840 Nothing. Wealthy Englishman. 148 00:10:59,840 --> 00:11:02,160 Wait a minute! 149 00:11:02,160 --> 00:11:03,640 Napoleon! 150 00:11:05,600 --> 00:11:07,280 That's the dessert menu. 151 00:11:08,440 --> 00:11:10,240 Then we've got nobody! 152 00:11:10,240 --> 00:11:14,320 Quick, run down to the Stork Club and see if anyone's left over 153 00:11:14,320 --> 00:11:16,480 from last night. Aye, aye, sir. 154 00:11:17,880 --> 00:11:19,160 Would you just calm down? 155 00:11:19,160 --> 00:11:21,800 How can I calm down? We're about to spend six days 156 00:11:21,800 --> 00:11:25,600 pretending to be something that we're not, and why? Why?! 157 00:11:25,600 --> 00:11:30,640 So we can hitch a free ride on the world's classiest ocean liner, 158 00:11:30,640 --> 00:11:34,000 that's why. And you think you're the only person on this barge 159 00:11:34,000 --> 00:11:36,720 pretending to be something that he's not? Half the passengers... 160 00:11:36,720 --> 00:11:39,120 Hey, captain, where's the celebrities? 161 00:11:39,120 --> 00:11:41,680 This tab is deader than the Flying Dutchman. 162 00:11:41,680 --> 00:11:43,880 Oh, fellows, please! 163 00:11:43,880 --> 00:11:46,720 My two stray sheep! Come along. 164 00:11:46,720 --> 00:11:48,680 Ah, the gentlemen of the press. 165 00:11:48,680 --> 00:11:50,760 I am Henry T Dobson. 166 00:11:50,760 --> 00:11:54,240 Not THE Henry T Dobson?! 167 00:11:54,240 --> 00:11:56,520 Are you serious, Captain? Cut the bushwah. 168 00:11:56,520 --> 00:11:58,320 As you no doubt have heard, 169 00:11:58,320 --> 00:12:01,520 I'm on the way to the Westminster conference where I shall present 170 00:12:01,520 --> 00:12:04,920 my two newest converts, Luke and John. 171 00:12:07,520 --> 00:12:12,240 Luke here was a compulsive gambler, who, as a reminder of his former 172 00:12:12,240 --> 00:12:14,480 shame, still carries with him a deck of cards. 173 00:12:14,480 --> 00:12:16,640 And poor John was a compulsive drinker... 174 00:12:16,640 --> 00:12:19,160 Reno Sweeney! All right, now getting somewhere! 175 00:12:19,160 --> 00:12:21,720 I'll say. Hey, Reno, what are you doing on board this tub? 176 00:12:21,720 --> 00:12:23,640 Same thing I do at my nightclub, boys. 177 00:12:23,640 --> 00:12:26,240 I'll be saving sinners twice a night in the ship's lounge. 178 00:12:26,240 --> 00:12:28,440 I see you brought the sinners with you. 179 00:12:28,440 --> 00:12:29,960 Meet my angels. 180 00:12:29,960 --> 00:12:31,000 Purity. Hi. 181 00:12:31,000 --> 00:12:32,120 Chastity. Hi. 182 00:12:32,120 --> 00:12:33,440 Charity. Hi. 183 00:12:33,440 --> 00:12:36,440 And I'm Virtue. 184 00:12:36,440 --> 00:12:37,920 BOTH: Hi. 185 00:12:37,920 --> 00:12:39,640 The easy kind, no doubt. 186 00:12:39,640 --> 00:12:41,440 Say, brother, was that a pass? 187 00:12:41,440 --> 00:12:45,080 Miss Sweeney, I have no interest in either you or your fallen angels. 188 00:12:45,080 --> 00:12:47,400 I'm ashamed to be seen in public with you. 189 00:12:47,400 --> 00:12:50,160 How about a picture, boys? Yes, please. 190 00:12:50,160 --> 00:12:52,160 If you could just hold there. 191 00:12:52,160 --> 00:12:54,040 Make sure to send a couple to the Archbishop. 192 00:12:54,040 --> 00:12:56,600 HE GRUMBLES Luke! John! 193 00:12:56,600 --> 00:12:58,840 ANGELS: Bye! I tell you, boys, 194 00:12:58,840 --> 00:13:01,400 it ain't easy being New York's most notorious evangelist. 195 00:13:01,400 --> 00:13:04,160 Come, who will lead this sinner beside distilled waters? 196 00:13:08,040 --> 00:13:10,040 BOTH: What? 197 00:13:10,040 --> 00:13:11,520 Which way to the bar? 198 00:13:11,520 --> 00:13:13,280 Oh, just through there. Thank you. 199 00:13:13,280 --> 00:13:16,880 Oh, hey, girls, give us the hallelujah. 200 00:13:18,000 --> 00:13:20,480 ANGELS: Hallelujah! 201 00:13:20,480 --> 00:13:21,800 Ooh! 202 00:13:21,800 --> 00:13:23,840 Hey, look! Hope Harcourt! 203 00:13:23,840 --> 00:13:26,960 Hey, Miss Harcourt, are you presiding at the gold and silver 204 00:13:26,960 --> 00:13:29,400 ball this year? How about the Newport cotillion? 205 00:13:29,400 --> 00:13:32,200 Gentlemen, my daughter's debutante days are over. 206 00:13:32,200 --> 00:13:34,320 She's about to be married. 207 00:13:34,320 --> 00:13:36,800 BOTH: Married?! Yes, it's true. 208 00:13:36,800 --> 00:13:38,800 I'm marrying Lord Evelyn Oakleigh. 209 00:13:38,800 --> 00:13:40,880 We're getting married at St Paul's Cathedral, 210 00:13:40,880 --> 00:13:42,920 and I'm very, very happy. 211 00:13:42,920 --> 00:13:45,360 Hey, Edith, how about a smooch? 212 00:13:45,360 --> 00:13:46,840 I beg your pardon? 213 00:13:46,840 --> 00:13:49,480 That's a kiss, your Highness. 214 00:13:49,480 --> 00:13:51,680 No! How marvellous! 215 00:13:51,680 --> 00:13:55,480 You know, I'm making a collection of expressions you Americans use. 216 00:13:55,480 --> 00:13:58,680 "A smooch is a kiss." 217 00:13:59,800 --> 00:14:02,280 I say, darling, how about a smooch? 218 00:14:04,960 --> 00:14:08,520 Egad! Evangeline Harcourt! 219 00:14:08,520 --> 00:14:10,560 Elisha Whitney! 220 00:14:10,560 --> 00:14:12,000 HE GROWLS 221 00:14:12,000 --> 00:14:14,080 Down, boy, down. 222 00:14:14,080 --> 00:14:17,160 Eli, you haven't changed in 40 years. 223 00:14:17,160 --> 00:14:19,520 Me?! Look at you! 224 00:14:19,520 --> 00:14:22,080 You always did know how to fill a girdle. 225 00:14:22,080 --> 00:14:23,560 Eli, really! 226 00:14:23,560 --> 00:14:26,440 Have some respect for the memory of my late husband. 227 00:14:26,440 --> 00:14:28,240 Of course, forgive me. 228 00:14:28,240 --> 00:14:33,040 You know, if it's any consolation, I was just coming out of 229 00:14:33,040 --> 00:14:36,280 the stock exchange when he took off from that ledge. 230 00:14:41,480 --> 00:14:43,920 He jumped like a Yale man. 231 00:14:45,320 --> 00:14:46,680 Thank you, Eli. 232 00:14:46,680 --> 00:14:48,240 Boss, your passport. 233 00:14:48,240 --> 00:14:50,400 Oh, my gosh! Eli, you know my daughter Hope. 234 00:14:50,400 --> 00:14:54,400 And this is her fiance, Lord Evelyn Oakleigh. 235 00:14:54,400 --> 00:14:55,720 Her fiance? 236 00:14:55,720 --> 00:14:58,920 German word, Crocker. It means they're getting married. 237 00:14:58,920 --> 00:15:00,760 I don't believe it! I still don't either. 238 00:15:00,760 --> 00:15:04,160 And yet a week from now, my little Hope will be a Lady. 239 00:15:04,160 --> 00:15:06,640 This calls for a drink! Come along, everybody. 240 00:15:06,640 --> 00:15:08,320 Isn't Mr Crocker going to join us? 241 00:15:08,320 --> 00:15:10,760 No, no. He's got a date down on Wall Street. 242 00:15:10,760 --> 00:15:12,720 Get going, Crocker, and sell those shares. 243 00:15:12,720 --> 00:15:14,320 Yes, sir. This way, my dear. 244 00:15:14,320 --> 00:15:15,600 Hope, wait... 245 00:15:15,600 --> 00:15:17,960 WHISTLE BLOWS 246 00:15:17,960 --> 00:15:24,840 All ashore that's going ashore. All ashore that's going ashore. 247 00:15:26,000 --> 00:15:28,120 Who is God? The creator of all things. 248 00:15:28,120 --> 00:15:30,120 Where is God? God is everywhere. 249 00:15:30,120 --> 00:15:31,680 And what does God know? 250 00:15:31,680 --> 00:15:34,680 Who's going to win the Kentucky derby. 251 00:15:34,680 --> 00:15:37,000 You, have you seen a minister? 252 00:15:37,000 --> 00:15:38,240 A what? 253 00:15:38,240 --> 00:15:42,000 FBI. We're looking for a gangster dressed up like a minister. 254 00:15:42,000 --> 00:15:44,320 You seen him? Yeah, he went that way. 255 00:15:44,320 --> 00:15:47,240 Show us. I've got to see somebody in the bar. 256 00:15:47,240 --> 00:15:48,680 BOTH: Show us. 257 00:15:48,680 --> 00:15:50,560 Look, guys, I really don't have time for this. 258 00:15:50,560 --> 00:15:52,840 Was it this way? This is ridiculous. Come on. 259 00:15:55,080 --> 00:15:57,560 Psst! Moonie! 260 00:15:57,560 --> 00:15:59,400 The coast is clear. Erma! 261 00:16:01,760 --> 00:16:03,160 Erma! Hey! 262 00:16:04,400 --> 00:16:06,120 Are we in England yet? 263 00:16:06,120 --> 00:16:08,240 Where's Snake Eyes? He hasn't showed. 264 00:16:08,240 --> 00:16:09,600 To hell with Snake Eyes! 265 00:16:09,600 --> 00:16:12,280 Come on, he's public enemy number one, he can take care of himself. 266 00:16:12,280 --> 00:16:14,560 Oh, my God, you don't suppose the cops nabbed him? 267 00:16:14,560 --> 00:16:16,800 I've got to find him! Snake Eyes! 268 00:16:16,800 --> 00:16:19,040 Snake Eyes! Quiet! Quiet! 269 00:16:19,040 --> 00:16:21,400 We're trying to make a getaway here, OK? Mm-hm. 270 00:16:21,400 --> 00:16:22,800 SNAKE EYES! Erma, just... 271 00:16:22,800 --> 00:16:24,720 Now look what you made me do. 272 00:16:24,720 --> 00:16:26,360 That's my "straddle various." 273 00:16:26,360 --> 00:16:29,160 Ah! A fellow cleric. 274 00:16:29,160 --> 00:16:30,920 No, I'm out of here. 275 00:16:30,920 --> 00:16:33,520 Allow me to introduce myself, Doctor. 276 00:16:33,520 --> 00:16:35,320 The Reverend Henry T Dobson. Yeah. 277 00:16:35,320 --> 00:16:37,640 Are you on your way to the conference? 278 00:16:37,640 --> 00:16:40,360 No, I was thinking of going to bed early tonight, OK? 279 00:16:40,360 --> 00:16:43,080 Oh, I mean the Westminster conference. 280 00:16:43,080 --> 00:16:45,440 No, you see, I'm not a west minister. 281 00:16:45,440 --> 00:16:48,000 I'm more in the east. 282 00:16:48,000 --> 00:16:50,040 What is your field, Doctor? 283 00:16:50,040 --> 00:16:51,640 Me, I'm a missionary. 284 00:16:51,640 --> 00:16:54,760 A missionary! Where? Way out in China. 285 00:16:54,760 --> 00:16:56,520 Oh, I served in China for years! 286 00:16:56,520 --> 00:16:58,760 Oh, wow, that's amazing. 287 00:16:58,760 --> 00:17:01,200 Well, I wasn't actually in China, I was more... 288 00:17:01,200 --> 00:17:04,560 Oh, I see, you were in Indochina. 289 00:17:04,560 --> 00:17:07,800 That's right, I was, it was Indoor China, yeah, yeah. 290 00:17:07,800 --> 00:17:09,280 And you were... 291 00:17:09,280 --> 00:17:11,120 BOTH: Outdoor China! 292 00:17:12,720 --> 00:17:14,240 That's so funny. 293 00:17:14,240 --> 00:17:16,960 Yes. We'll have lots to talk about. 294 00:17:16,960 --> 00:17:19,320 Sure. HE SPEAKS CHINESE 295 00:17:19,320 --> 00:17:21,280 I'm sorry? 296 00:17:21,280 --> 00:17:23,080 HE SPEAKS CHINESE 297 00:17:23,080 --> 00:17:25,280 You took the words right out of my mouth. 298 00:17:25,280 --> 00:17:26,640 Hey, there he is! 299 00:17:26,640 --> 00:17:29,440 FBI! Gotcha, Moon. 300 00:17:29,440 --> 00:17:31,240 Unhand me this instant! 301 00:17:31,240 --> 00:17:34,120 I am the Reverend Henry T Dobson! 302 00:17:34,120 --> 00:17:35,840 Save it for the judge, buddy. 303 00:17:35,840 --> 00:17:38,320 Oh, my God, they're taking him away! 304 00:17:38,320 --> 00:17:40,560 He's gone! He's gone! What are we going to do? 305 00:17:40,560 --> 00:17:44,120 Excuse me, captain, is there a casino on the ship? 306 00:17:44,120 --> 00:17:46,120 Why, no. 307 00:17:47,720 --> 00:17:49,480 There is now. 308 00:17:49,480 --> 00:17:50,920 Luke, stop! What are you doing? 309 00:17:50,920 --> 00:17:52,920 We're going to end up in the brig! 310 00:17:52,920 --> 00:17:56,720 I just wanted to say bon voyage to the lady, boss. 311 00:17:56,720 --> 00:17:58,760 You'll be saying bon voyage to your job, Crocker, 312 00:17:58,760 --> 00:18:00,960 unless you get the hell off this boat! 313 00:18:00,960 --> 00:18:02,480 SHIP HORN SOUNDS 314 00:18:02,480 --> 00:18:04,200 I can find Snake Eyes anywhere! 315 00:18:04,200 --> 00:18:06,640 What will I do? He's my man! He's my life! 316 00:18:06,640 --> 00:18:08,760 Erma, Erma, forget Snake Eyes! 317 00:18:08,760 --> 00:18:10,160 WOLF WHISTLE 318 00:18:10,160 --> 00:18:12,080 OK. 319 00:18:12,080 --> 00:18:13,720 Final call! 320 00:18:13,720 --> 00:18:16,480 All ashore that's going ashore. 321 00:18:16,480 --> 00:18:18,120 You blew it, Snake Eyes! 322 00:18:18,120 --> 00:18:20,200 Now what'll I do with his passport and ticket? 323 00:18:20,200 --> 00:18:22,480 Could you let me have them? Who are you? 324 00:18:22,480 --> 00:18:24,440 Give him the goods, come on, he saved my ass. 325 00:18:24,440 --> 00:18:26,160 Thanks a lot. 326 00:18:26,160 --> 00:18:28,000 "Murray Hill Cleaners." 327 00:18:28,000 --> 00:18:30,720 Murray Hill Cleaners? Where'd he get a name like that? 328 00:18:30,720 --> 00:18:32,080 The Yellow Pages. 329 00:18:33,240 --> 00:18:35,120 Final call! 330 00:18:35,120 --> 00:18:37,960 All ashore that's going ashore! 331 00:18:37,960 --> 00:18:40,080 Final call! 332 00:18:41,520 --> 00:18:43,200 Oh, what am I doing? 333 00:18:43,200 --> 00:18:45,640 I'm supposed to be down on Wall Street! 334 00:18:52,600 --> 00:18:53,960 ♪ Bon voy-age 335 00:18:53,960 --> 00:18:56,360 ♪ You mean bon voyage 336 00:18:56,360 --> 00:19:00,080 ♪ I hate to say goodbye, sweetheart 337 00:19:00,080 --> 00:19:01,800 ♪ By the seashore 338 00:19:01,800 --> 00:19:04,200 ♪ You mean sur la plage 339 00:19:04,200 --> 00:19:06,160 ♪ I'll wait and watch the sea 340 00:19:06,160 --> 00:19:07,920 ♪ Till you come back to me 341 00:19:07,920 --> 00:19:09,280 ♪ Oh, my dearie 342 00:19:09,280 --> 00:19:11,680 ♪ You mean ma cherie 343 00:19:11,680 --> 00:19:13,040 ♪ I'm yours for life 344 00:19:13,040 --> 00:19:15,640 ♪ You mean pour la vie 345 00:19:15,640 --> 00:19:17,680 ♪ So kiss me, pretty wench 346 00:19:17,680 --> 00:19:19,520 In English or in French 347 00:19:19,520 --> 00:19:23,680 ♪ Bon voy-age, bon voyage 348 00:19:30,880 --> 00:19:34,560 ♪ Oh, there is no cure like travel # Bon voy-age, I mean bon voyage 349 00:19:34,560 --> 00:19:37,120 ♪ To help you unravel # I hate to say goodbye, sweetheart 350 00:19:37,120 --> 00:19:39,280 ♪ The worries of living today # By the seashore 351 00:19:39,280 --> 00:19:41,400 ♪ When the poor brain is cracking # I mean sur la plage 352 00:19:41,400 --> 00:19:43,800 ♪ There's nothing like packing # I'll wait and watch the sea 353 00:19:43,800 --> 00:19:45,960 ♪ A suitcase and sailing away # Till you come back to me 354 00:19:45,960 --> 00:19:48,680 ♪ Take a run round Vienna, Granada, Ravenna, Siena 355 00:19:48,680 --> 00:19:53,400 ♪ And then around Rome # Oh, my dearie, I mean ma cherie 356 00:19:53,400 --> 00:19:55,520 ♪ Have a high time # So kiss me, pretty wench 357 00:19:55,520 --> 00:19:57,720 ♪ A low time, and in no time # In English or in French 358 00:19:57,720 --> 00:19:59,480 ♪ You'll be singing home, sweet home 359 00:19:59,480 --> 00:20:03,640 ♪ Bon voyage! ♪ 360 00:20:10,680 --> 00:20:12,600 ♪ Oh, there is no cure like travel 361 00:20:12,600 --> 00:20:14,320 ♪ To help you unravel 362 00:20:14,320 --> 00:20:17,040 ♪ The worries of living today 363 00:20:17,040 --> 00:20:20,040 ♪ When the poor brain is cracking 364 00:20:20,040 --> 00:20:21,840 ♪ There's nothing like packing 365 00:20:21,840 --> 00:20:24,720 ♪ A suitcase and sailing away 366 00:20:24,720 --> 00:20:30,760 ♪ Take a run round Vienna, Granada, Ravenna, Siena 367 00:20:30,760 --> 00:20:32,760 ♪ And then around Rome 368 00:20:32,760 --> 00:20:34,800 ♪ Have a high time 369 00:20:34,800 --> 00:20:36,560 ♪ A low time, and in no time 370 00:20:36,560 --> 00:20:39,640 ♪ You'll be singing home, sweet home. ♪ 371 00:20:42,520 --> 00:20:46,880 Last seating for supper. Thank you. 372 00:20:46,880 --> 00:20:50,160 Excuse me, Purser, I'm looking for Miss Hope Harcourt. 373 00:20:50,160 --> 00:20:51,560 Is she in the dining room? 374 00:20:51,560 --> 00:20:54,600 She and Lord Oakleigh were down for the 8.00 seating, Mr... 375 00:20:54,600 --> 00:20:56,600 Oh, Flowers. 376 00:20:56,600 --> 00:20:58,360 Murray Hill Flowers. 377 00:20:58,360 --> 00:21:00,680 "Murray Hill Flowers"? 378 00:21:00,680 --> 00:21:02,440 I mean "Cleaners"! Nuts! 379 00:21:02,440 --> 00:21:05,360 What is your name, sir? 380 00:21:05,360 --> 00:21:06,840 Billy Crocker! 381 00:21:06,840 --> 00:21:08,560 Oh hey, Billy, good to see you! 382 00:21:08,560 --> 00:21:09,680 You came after all! 383 00:21:09,680 --> 00:21:11,040 BILLY CLEARS THROAT POINTEDLY 384 00:21:11,040 --> 00:21:13,160 I didn't see you come aboard. Where you been hiding? 385 00:21:13,160 --> 00:21:15,080 HE CLEARS THROAT AGAIN How'd you get a ticket? 386 00:21:15,080 --> 00:21:16,920 Oh, you're still sore at me for last night. 387 00:21:16,920 --> 00:21:18,200 Listen, Billy, I wanted... 388 00:21:26,200 --> 00:21:28,560 You're not sore at me for last night. 389 00:21:28,560 --> 00:21:30,320 Well, you should be, I was out of line. 390 00:21:30,320 --> 00:21:32,280 Forget it, Reno. No, no, it's your love life. 391 00:21:32,280 --> 00:21:34,520 If you're satisfied with second-best, forget about me 392 00:21:34,520 --> 00:21:36,000 and go after Miss Fantastic. 393 00:21:36,000 --> 00:21:38,240 Well, I did. She's on the boat. 394 00:21:38,240 --> 00:21:39,680 Fantastic. 395 00:21:39,680 --> 00:21:41,800 Oh, Reno, I'm in a mess. 396 00:21:41,800 --> 00:21:45,000 I'm going to lose my job, my boss is going to lose his shirt, 397 00:21:45,000 --> 00:21:47,160 and all because of some damned dame. 398 00:21:47,160 --> 00:21:49,040 Well, she must be some damned dame. 399 00:21:49,040 --> 00:21:50,600 Oh, Reno, she is. 400 00:21:50,600 --> 00:21:52,360 You are going to love her. 401 00:21:52,360 --> 00:21:53,840 Her name is Hope. 402 00:21:53,840 --> 00:21:55,760 Hope Harcourt. 403 00:21:55,760 --> 00:21:57,440 Hope Harcourt? 404 00:21:57,440 --> 00:22:00,040 The debutante hope Harcourt? 405 00:22:00,040 --> 00:22:01,880 The one who came out on a Zeppelin? 406 00:22:01,880 --> 00:22:04,320 The one who chases foxes on the cover of Life?! 407 00:22:04,320 --> 00:22:06,120 What are you saying, she's out of my league? 408 00:22:06,120 --> 00:22:07,920 Billy... Hell, maybe she is. 409 00:22:07,920 --> 00:22:10,040 Billy... No, no, I can see it now. 410 00:22:10,040 --> 00:22:14,000 Guys like me deliver her groceries, they don't walk her down the aisle. 411 00:22:14,000 --> 00:22:19,800 Besides, she's engaged to some English guy, 412 00:22:19,800 --> 00:22:21,880 an earl or something. 413 00:22:23,520 --> 00:22:24,880 Billy... 414 00:22:28,200 --> 00:22:30,120 ..we've been friends forever, right? 415 00:22:31,480 --> 00:22:36,600 Yeah. So friend to friend, let me ask you something. 416 00:22:36,600 --> 00:22:39,560 Where the hell is the old Crocker confidence? 417 00:22:39,560 --> 00:22:42,000 You think some teabag can compete with you? 418 00:22:42,000 --> 00:22:44,840 You think he's got one tiny fraction of your brains, 419 00:22:44,840 --> 00:22:47,040 your looks, your... 420 00:22:49,640 --> 00:22:51,000 Your... 421 00:22:53,160 --> 00:22:55,440 ♪ At words poetic, I'm so pathetic 422 00:22:55,440 --> 00:22:58,200 ♪ That I always have found it best 423 00:22:58,200 --> 00:23:00,600 ♪ Instead of getting 'em off my chest 424 00:23:00,600 --> 00:23:03,520 ♪ To let 'em rest unexpressed 425 00:23:03,520 --> 00:23:05,720 ♪ I hate parading my serenading 426 00:23:05,720 --> 00:23:08,400 ♪ As I'll probably miss a bar 427 00:23:08,400 --> 00:23:11,000 ♪ But if this ditty is not so pretty 428 00:23:11,000 --> 00:23:14,120 ♪ At least it'll tell you how great you are 429 00:23:14,120 --> 00:23:16,800 ♪ You're the top 430 00:23:16,800 --> 00:23:19,240 ♪ You're the Colosseum 431 00:23:19,240 --> 00:23:21,600 ♪ You're the top 432 00:23:21,600 --> 00:23:24,240 ♪ You're the Louvre Museum 433 00:23:24,240 --> 00:23:27,840 ♪ You're a melody from a symphony by Strauss 434 00:23:27,840 --> 00:23:29,160 ♪ You're a Bendel bonnet 435 00:23:29,160 --> 00:23:30,600 ♪ A Shakespeare sonnet 436 00:23:30,600 --> 00:23:32,520 ♪ You're Mickey Mouse 437 00:23:33,720 --> 00:23:36,200 ♪ You're the Nile 438 00:23:36,200 --> 00:23:38,880 ♪ You're the Tower of Pisa 439 00:23:38,880 --> 00:23:43,600 ♪ You're the smile on the Mona Lisa 440 00:23:43,600 --> 00:23:47,160 ♪ I'm a worthless check, a total wreck, a flop 441 00:23:47,160 --> 00:23:52,160 ♪ But if, baby, I'm the bottom, you're the top 442 00:23:52,160 --> 00:23:54,560 ♪ Your words pathetic are not pathetic 443 00:23:54,560 --> 00:23:57,120 ♪ On the other hand, babe, you shine 444 00:23:57,120 --> 00:23:59,480 ♪ And I can feel after ev'ry line 445 00:23:59,480 --> 00:24:01,760 ♪ A thrill divine 446 00:24:01,760 --> 00:24:04,000 ♪ Down my spine 447 00:24:04,000 --> 00:24:07,680 ♪ Now gifted humans like Vincent Youmans 448 00:24:07,680 --> 00:24:10,320 ♪ Might think that your song is bad 449 00:24:10,320 --> 00:24:13,040 ♪ But I got a notion I'll second the motion 450 00:24:13,040 --> 00:24:16,480 ♪ And this is what I'm going to add 451 00:24:16,480 --> 00:24:19,200 ♪ You're the top 452 00:24:19,200 --> 00:24:21,680 ♪ You're Mahatma Gandhi 453 00:24:21,680 --> 00:24:24,120 ♪ You're the top 454 00:24:24,120 --> 00:24:26,520 ♪ You're Napoleon Brandy 455 00:24:26,520 --> 00:24:30,120 ♪ You're the purple light of a summer night in Spain 456 00:24:30,120 --> 00:24:31,560 ♪ You're the National Gallery 457 00:24:31,560 --> 00:24:33,040 ♪ You're Garbo's salary 458 00:24:33,040 --> 00:24:35,240 ♪ You're cellophane 459 00:24:36,240 --> 00:24:38,600 ♪ You're sublime 460 00:24:38,600 --> 00:24:41,160 ♪ You're a turkey dinner 461 00:24:41,160 --> 00:24:45,800 ♪ You're the time of the derby winner 462 00:24:45,800 --> 00:24:49,440 ♪ I'm a toy balloon that's fated soon to pop 463 00:24:49,440 --> 00:24:53,720 ♪ But if, baby, I'm the bottom, you're the top 464 00:24:55,720 --> 00:24:57,640 ♪ You're the top 465 00:24:57,640 --> 00:25:00,040 ♪ You're an Arrow collar 466 00:25:00,040 --> 00:25:02,400 ♪ You're the top 467 00:25:02,400 --> 00:25:04,880 ♪ You're a Coolidge dollar 468 00:25:04,880 --> 00:25:08,440 ♪ You're the nimble tread of the feet of Fred Astaire 469 00:25:08,440 --> 00:25:09,680 ♪ You're an O'Neill drama 470 00:25:09,680 --> 00:25:11,040 ♪ You're Whistler's mama 471 00:25:11,040 --> 00:25:14,000 ♪ You're camembert 472 00:25:14,000 --> 00:25:16,760 ♪ You're a rose 473 00:25:16,760 --> 00:25:19,240 ♪ You're Inferno's Dante 474 00:25:19,240 --> 00:25:23,720 ♪ You're the nose on the great Durante 475 00:25:23,720 --> 00:25:25,120 ♪ I'm just in the way 476 00:25:25,120 --> 00:25:27,360 ♪ As the French would say, "de trop" 477 00:25:27,360 --> 00:25:31,640 ♪ But if, baby, I'm the bottom, you're the top 478 00:25:33,200 --> 00:25:35,160 ♪ You're the top 479 00:25:35,160 --> 00:25:37,640 ♪ You're a dance in Bali 480 00:25:37,640 --> 00:25:39,440 ♪ You're the top 481 00:25:39,440 --> 00:25:41,560 ♪ You're a hot tamale 482 00:25:41,560 --> 00:25:44,760 ♪ You're an angel, you, simply too, too, too diveen 483 00:25:44,760 --> 00:25:46,360 ♪ You're a Botticelli 484 00:25:46,360 --> 00:25:48,040 ♪ You're Keats # You're Shelley 485 00:25:48,040 --> 00:25:49,400 ♪ You're Ovaltine 486 00:25:50,720 --> 00:25:52,280 ♪ You're a boon 487 00:25:52,280 --> 00:25:54,720 ♪ You're the dam at Boulder 488 00:25:54,720 --> 00:25:56,760 ♪ You're the moon 489 00:25:56,760 --> 00:25:59,160 ♪ Over Mae West's shoulder 490 00:25:59,160 --> 00:26:01,280 ♪ I'm the nominee of the GOP 491 00:26:01,280 --> 00:26:02,800 ♪ Or Gop 492 00:26:02,800 --> 00:26:11,160 ♪ But if, baby, I'm the bottom 493 00:26:11,160 --> 00:26:16,080 ♪ You're the top 494 00:26:23,000 --> 00:26:24,880 ♪ You're the top 495 00:26:24,880 --> 00:26:26,760 ♪ You're my Swanee River 496 00:26:26,760 --> 00:26:28,680 ♪ You're the top 497 00:26:28,680 --> 00:26:31,240 ♪ You're goose's liver 498 00:26:31,240 --> 00:26:34,200 ♪ You're the baby grand of a lady and a gent 499 00:26:34,200 --> 00:26:36,760 ♪ You're a dress from Saks's, you're next year's taxes 500 00:26:36,760 --> 00:26:38,480 ♪ You're Pepsodent 501 00:26:40,080 --> 00:26:41,680 ♪ You're a prize 502 00:26:41,680 --> 00:26:43,920 ♪ You're a night at Coney 503 00:26:43,920 --> 00:26:48,720 ♪ You're the eyes of Irene Bordoni 504 00:26:48,720 --> 00:26:51,800 ♪ I'm a frightened frog that can find no log to hop 505 00:26:51,800 --> 00:26:55,600 ♪ But if, baby, I'm the bottom, you're the top 506 00:26:57,160 --> 00:26:59,040 ♪ You're the top 507 00:26:59,040 --> 00:27:01,160 ♪ You're a Waldorf salad 508 00:27:01,160 --> 00:27:03,120 ♪ You're the top 509 00:27:03,120 --> 00:27:05,400 ♪ You're a Berlin ballad 510 00:27:05,400 --> 00:27:08,480 ♪ You're the boats that glide on the sleepy Zuider Zee 511 00:27:08,480 --> 00:27:09,840 ♪ You're an Old Dutch master 512 00:27:09,840 --> 00:27:11,160 ♪ You're Lady Aster 513 00:27:11,160 --> 00:27:13,680 ♪ You're broccoli 514 00:27:13,680 --> 00:27:15,960 ♪ You're romance 515 00:27:15,960 --> 00:27:18,280 ♪ You're the steppes of Russia 516 00:27:18,280 --> 00:27:22,200 ♪ You're the pants on a Roxy usher 517 00:27:22,200 --> 00:27:23,800 ♪ I'm a broken doll 518 00:27:23,800 --> 00:27:25,800 ♪ A fol-de-rol # A blop 519 00:27:25,800 --> 00:27:34,040 ♪ But if, baby, I'm the bottom 520 00:27:34,040 --> 00:27:41,600 ♪ You're the top. ♪ 521 00:27:41,600 --> 00:27:44,120 APPLAUSE 522 00:27:47,840 --> 00:27:51,880 Try taking deep breaths, dear, that always helps me. 523 00:27:54,760 --> 00:27:56,560 Maybe you should go lie down. 524 00:27:56,560 --> 00:27:58,040 And leave you all alone? 525 00:27:58,040 --> 00:27:59,600 I wouldn't dream of it. 526 00:27:59,600 --> 00:28:03,120 Besides, I'll be right as rain as soon as we escape these swells. 527 00:28:03,120 --> 00:28:05,960 But the sea's as flat as a pancake, dear. 528 00:28:05,960 --> 00:28:09,600 Oh, Hope, please, I wish you wouldn't mention food just now. 529 00:28:09,600 --> 00:28:11,760 Sorry. I'll go get you a Bromo. 530 00:28:13,600 --> 00:28:15,040 Hiya, Hope, how you doing? 531 00:28:15,040 --> 00:28:16,200 Hello, Billy. 532 00:28:16,200 --> 00:28:19,080 Billy! You know, you're beautiful when you're about to faint. 533 00:28:19,080 --> 00:28:20,720 Billy, I didn't know you were sailing! 534 00:28:20,720 --> 00:28:22,760 I didn't either. Then what are you doing here? 535 00:28:22,760 --> 00:28:24,240 I'm selling life preservers. 536 00:28:24,240 --> 00:28:27,760 No, Hope, I stowed away to be with you. 537 00:28:27,760 --> 00:28:29,880 I couldn't let you go. 538 00:28:29,880 --> 00:28:31,360 Oh, Billy. 539 00:28:31,360 --> 00:28:32,680 EVELYN GROANS 540 00:28:32,680 --> 00:28:37,200 Oh, Billy, this is my fiance, Evelyn Oakleigh. 541 00:28:37,200 --> 00:28:39,760 Ah, Billy Crocker, pleased to meet you! 542 00:28:39,760 --> 00:28:43,160 Forgive me, I'm afraid I rather overdid it in the dining room. 543 00:28:43,160 --> 00:28:45,480 Me too. Did you have the sweetbreads? 544 00:28:45,480 --> 00:28:47,240 Best brains I ever ate. 545 00:28:47,240 --> 00:28:49,760 Billy! Although I've never seen them serve that way before, 546 00:28:49,760 --> 00:28:51,600 with jellied eels and headcheese. 547 00:28:51,600 --> 00:28:54,280 Billy, stop it! Night, all! 548 00:28:54,280 --> 00:28:56,160 Billy, was that fair? 549 00:28:56,160 --> 00:28:59,640 Fair? I find you standing here in the moonlight with him. 550 00:28:59,640 --> 00:29:01,880 I didn't shoot him, I didn't push him overboard, 551 00:29:01,880 --> 00:29:03,360 I thought I was more than fair. 552 00:29:03,360 --> 00:29:05,120 You're being terribly bad, Billy. 553 00:29:05,120 --> 00:29:07,520 Why, we hardly know each other. 554 00:29:09,080 --> 00:29:10,920 "Hardly know each other"? 555 00:29:10,920 --> 00:29:15,480 We met one night at a party, we danced, had a little too much wine, 556 00:29:15,480 --> 00:29:17,680 we took a little spin round the park. 557 00:29:17,680 --> 00:29:20,720 You call five hours in the back of a taxi "a little spin"? 558 00:29:20,720 --> 00:29:23,200 Four hours. Five, remember you fell asleep after we...? 559 00:29:23,200 --> 00:29:24,760 I remember. 560 00:29:24,760 --> 00:29:28,560 And then I took you down to that little cafe by the docks. 561 00:29:28,560 --> 00:29:30,960 We ate breakfast as the sun came up. 562 00:29:30,960 --> 00:29:33,040 Yeah, we talked about going to California 563 00:29:33,040 --> 00:29:36,800 and getting a little bungalow, raising orange trees. 564 00:29:36,800 --> 00:29:39,120 Raising kids. 565 00:29:39,120 --> 00:29:41,360 Billy, that was a fantasy. 566 00:29:41,360 --> 00:29:43,280 Things like that just aren't done. 567 00:29:44,600 --> 00:29:46,840 Yeah! 568 00:29:46,840 --> 00:29:49,120 Yeah, I guess you're right. 569 00:29:49,120 --> 00:29:51,040 Me and you, huh? 570 00:29:52,520 --> 00:29:55,080 Who am I kidding? 571 00:29:55,080 --> 00:30:01,120 ♪ I know too well that I'm just wasting precious time 572 00:30:01,120 --> 00:30:04,200 ♪ In thinking such a thing could be 573 00:30:04,200 --> 00:30:09,040 ♪ That you could ever care for me 574 00:30:09,040 --> 00:30:16,800 ♪ I'm sure you hate to hear that I adore you, dear 575 00:30:16,800 --> 00:30:22,200 ♪ But grant me, just the same 576 00:30:22,200 --> 00:30:27,880 ♪ I'm not entirely to blame 577 00:30:28,880 --> 00:30:36,440 ♪ For you'd be so easy to love 578 00:30:36,440 --> 00:30:40,360 ♪ So easy to idolise 579 00:30:40,360 --> 00:30:44,480 ♪ All others above 580 00:30:44,480 --> 00:30:51,000 ♪ So sweet to awaken with 581 00:30:51,000 --> 00:30:58,040 ♪ So nice to sit down to eggs and bacon with 582 00:30:58,040 --> 00:31:04,400 ♪ We'd be so grand at the game 583 00:31:04,400 --> 00:31:07,960 ♪ So carefree together 584 00:31:07,960 --> 00:31:15,200 ♪ That it does seem a shame 585 00:31:15,200 --> 00:31:19,600 ♪ That you can't see 586 00:31:19,600 --> 00:31:24,680 ♪ Your future with me 587 00:31:26,200 --> 00:31:35,480 ♪ Cos you'd be oh, so easy to love 588 00:32:26,520 --> 00:32:33,000 ♪ So worth the yearning for 589 00:32:33,000 --> 00:32:38,000 ♪ So swell to keep every home fire burning for 590 00:32:40,160 --> 00:32:45,960 ♪ Oh, how we'd bloom, how we'd thrive 591 00:32:45,960 --> 00:32:56,600 ♪ In a cottage for two, or even three, four, or five 592 00:32:59,240 --> 00:33:04,400 ♪ So try to see 593 00:33:04,400 --> 00:33:09,000 ♪ Your future with me 594 00:33:11,640 --> 00:33:27,520 ♪ Cos you'd be oh, so easy to love. ♪ 595 00:33:29,680 --> 00:33:32,920 APPLAUSE 596 00:33:34,880 --> 00:33:37,240 Billy, this is all wrong. 597 00:33:37,240 --> 00:33:38,760 I'm marrying Evelyn. 598 00:33:38,760 --> 00:33:40,080 Nothing can change that. 599 00:33:40,080 --> 00:33:41,520 YOU can change that. 600 00:33:41,520 --> 00:33:42,880 All you have to do is say... 601 00:33:42,880 --> 00:33:44,000 No! 602 00:33:44,000 --> 00:33:46,280 If you don't leave me alone, I'll make a scene. 603 00:33:51,320 --> 00:33:54,360 You love me, Hope. 604 00:33:54,360 --> 00:33:56,560 You're going to marry me. 605 00:34:00,280 --> 00:34:06,520 ♪ We'd be so grand at the game 606 00:34:06,520 --> 00:34:09,840 ♪ So carefree together 607 00:34:09,840 --> 00:34:17,800 ♪ That it does seem a shame 608 00:34:25,040 --> 00:34:37,480 ♪ Cos you'd be oh, so easy to love. ♪ 609 00:34:42,040 --> 00:34:44,040 APPLAUSE 610 00:34:54,000 --> 00:34:58,080 ♪ I want to row on the crew, Mama 611 00:34:58,080 --> 00:35:01,880 ♪ That's the thing I want to do, Mama 612 00:35:01,880 --> 00:35:05,720 ♪ To be known throughout Yale as I walk about it 613 00:35:05,720 --> 00:35:09,600 ♪ Get a boil on my tail and then talk about it... ♪ 614 00:35:13,360 --> 00:35:18,360 Operator, get me stateroom 1616, Mrs Evangeline Harcourt. 615 00:35:22,440 --> 00:35:24,720 Evangeline, it's Eli. 616 00:35:26,480 --> 00:35:28,480 Eli Whitney. 617 00:35:28,480 --> 00:35:30,920 Listen, I just had a swell idea. 618 00:35:30,920 --> 00:35:35,360 I'm all alone down here, and you're all alone up there. 619 00:35:35,360 --> 00:35:37,240 At least, I hope you are. 620 00:35:37,240 --> 00:35:39,160 HE CHUCKLES 621 00:35:39,160 --> 00:35:42,760 So what? Who cares what time it is, my turtle dove? 622 00:35:42,760 --> 00:35:45,920 I think of you, and time stands still. 623 00:35:45,920 --> 00:35:48,440 Why, your face alone would stop a clock. 624 00:35:50,760 --> 00:35:52,000 Hello? 625 00:35:53,400 --> 00:35:55,320 Must be on her way! 626 00:35:57,680 --> 00:36:01,440 ♪ I'd like to be a big bloke, Mama 627 00:36:01,440 --> 00:36:06,760 ♪ And learn that new Argentine stroke, Mama 628 00:36:06,760 --> 00:36:09,840 ♪ You'll see your slim son 629 00:36:09,840 --> 00:36:13,400 ♪ Putting crimps in the crimson 630 00:36:14,480 --> 00:36:19,080 ♪ When I row on the varsity crew. ♪ 631 00:36:19,080 --> 00:36:21,320 {\an8}Would you listen to that squawking? MOONIE: Yeah. 632 00:36:21,320 --> 00:36:23,480 How do I look, Moonie? 633 00:36:23,480 --> 00:36:25,040 Where do you think you're going? 634 00:36:25,040 --> 00:36:27,400 The boiler room. A certain sailor is going to show me 635 00:36:27,400 --> 00:36:29,560 the finer points of stoking. 636 00:36:29,560 --> 00:36:31,600 Oh, please, you're going nowhere. 637 00:36:31,600 --> 00:36:34,200 With your big mouth, you could land us both in Sing-Sing. 638 00:36:34,200 --> 00:36:35,720 Sit down, we're going to play cards. 639 00:36:35,720 --> 00:36:38,560 I don't want to play cards. Hey, Erma, sit down. 640 00:36:38,560 --> 00:36:40,640 KNOCK AT DOOR Yeah? Who is it? 641 00:36:40,640 --> 00:36:42,160 It's me, Billy. 642 00:36:42,160 --> 00:36:44,000 Oh, that's the kid. 643 00:36:44,000 --> 00:36:47,880 One moment, my son, we're saying our prayers. 644 00:36:47,880 --> 00:36:50,360 Say the prayers. Say the prayers! 645 00:36:50,360 --> 00:36:52,480 Art's father, who art in heaven. 646 00:36:52,480 --> 00:36:54,800 Halloween's my name. 647 00:36:54,800 --> 00:36:57,680 The kingfish come, de-dum-de-dum, 648 00:36:57,680 --> 00:37:01,120 on Earth as in New Haven! 649 00:37:01,120 --> 00:37:03,680 Come in, my son, come in. 650 00:37:03,680 --> 00:37:05,200 Amen. 651 00:37:05,200 --> 00:37:07,200 And bless you, my child, yeah. 652 00:37:09,920 --> 00:37:11,920 What? You seem troubled. 653 00:37:11,920 --> 00:37:13,800 Oh, I've got to lay low for a while. 654 00:37:13,800 --> 00:37:16,880 I don't think the Purser believes I'm Murray Hill Cleaners. 655 00:37:16,880 --> 00:37:18,960 Well, maybe I can assist you in some way. 656 00:37:18,960 --> 00:37:21,080 I don't think a minister can help me, Doc. 657 00:37:21,080 --> 00:37:23,560 The girl I'm in love with is going to marry another guy. 658 00:37:23,560 --> 00:37:27,240 Yeah? Well, I could kill the other guy. 659 00:37:27,240 --> 00:37:30,480 ♪ When I row on the Varsity crew. ♪ 660 00:37:30,480 --> 00:37:34,080 That's my boss! If he sees me on this ship, I'm dead! 661 00:37:34,080 --> 00:37:37,080 Yeah? Well, I bet he couldn't see you if I swiped his glasses. 662 00:37:37,080 --> 00:37:39,040 I don't know what church you belong to, Doc, 663 00:37:39,040 --> 00:37:40,840 but you're one hell of a Christian. 664 00:37:40,840 --> 00:37:42,440 Watch me go. 665 00:37:47,800 --> 00:37:49,240 KNOCK AT DOOR 666 00:37:49,240 --> 00:37:50,840 One moment, my pet. 667 00:37:52,240 --> 00:37:53,880 The game's afoot. 668 00:37:54,960 --> 00:37:57,320 Entre-vouz, mon petit cabbage. 669 00:38:00,480 --> 00:38:04,600 Oh, my dear, you look ravishing. 670 00:38:06,560 --> 00:38:08,840 Yeah, I think I need a shave myself. 671 00:38:08,840 --> 00:38:10,920 What?! 672 00:38:10,920 --> 00:38:12,160 What the hell? 673 00:38:12,160 --> 00:38:13,680 Padre! What are you doing here? 674 00:38:13,680 --> 00:38:15,160 I've come to take up the collection. 675 00:38:15,160 --> 00:38:16,880 I thought you did that in the chapel. 676 00:38:16,880 --> 00:38:18,640 Why, are you planning to attend chapel? 677 00:38:18,640 --> 00:38:20,080 Yeah, well, no. 678 00:38:20,080 --> 00:38:22,160 Then pony up, or I'll come back in the morning 679 00:38:22,160 --> 00:38:23,760 when you're nursing your hangover. 680 00:38:23,760 --> 00:38:27,920 Look at that, that's funny, I seem to be wearing someone else's hat. 681 00:38:27,920 --> 00:38:30,960 Can you read the initials in there? 682 00:38:30,960 --> 00:38:32,160 Achoo! 683 00:38:32,160 --> 00:38:33,920 Bless you. No, bless you. 684 00:38:37,040 --> 00:38:38,600 Where are my glasses? 685 00:38:38,600 --> 00:38:40,680 Are you sure you had them on when you barged in here? 686 00:38:40,680 --> 00:38:42,000 What? This is my stateroom! 687 00:38:42,000 --> 00:38:43,400 Then what am I doing in here? 688 00:38:43,400 --> 00:38:45,360 I've never been so insulted in all my life! 689 00:38:51,000 --> 00:38:53,200 Yeah, so I stole his glasses. 690 00:38:53,200 --> 00:38:56,600 Now we're going to be OK as long as the captain doesn't show up. 691 00:38:56,600 --> 00:38:57,800 KNOCK AT DOOR 692 00:38:57,800 --> 00:38:59,400 Who is it? The captain. 693 00:38:59,400 --> 00:39:01,720 Oh! One moment, please. 694 00:39:01,720 --> 00:39:03,200 Quick, hide him, hide him. 695 00:39:03,200 --> 00:39:05,080 One moment, thank you. 696 00:39:05,080 --> 00:39:06,720 Yeah, come in. 697 00:39:06,720 --> 00:39:10,640 And that, my dear, is how Goliath slayed Moses and the whale. 698 00:39:15,000 --> 00:39:21,720 Amen. Sorry to disturb you, Doctor, but does a Mr Murray Hill Cleaners 699 00:39:21,720 --> 00:39:23,120 occupy this cabin? 700 00:39:23,120 --> 00:39:25,920 No, not very often. Why? Is something wrong? 701 00:39:25,920 --> 00:39:28,560 We've had a radiogram from Washington. 702 00:39:28,560 --> 00:39:32,720 The man you're travelling with is not Murray Hill Cleaners. 703 00:39:32,720 --> 00:39:34,200 He's Snake Eyes Johnson. 704 00:39:34,200 --> 00:39:35,560 Public enemy number one. 705 00:39:35,560 --> 00:39:38,920 Public enemy number one! Wow, Santa Claus-a. 706 00:39:38,920 --> 00:39:41,280 Don't worry, Doctor, my men can handle him. 707 00:39:41,280 --> 00:39:44,520 If he does turn up, just give a shout. 708 00:39:44,520 --> 00:39:47,240 BOTH SHOUT 709 00:39:47,240 --> 00:39:48,880 Just practising. 710 00:39:48,880 --> 00:39:50,440 BOTH SHOUT 711 00:39:57,400 --> 00:39:59,400 Get him out. Get him out. 712 00:39:59,400 --> 00:40:01,040 Stop me if I'm out of line, Doc, 713 00:40:01,040 --> 00:40:03,600 but I don't think you're really a minister. 714 00:40:03,600 --> 00:40:06,240 OK, kid, I'm going to level with you. All right? 715 00:40:06,240 --> 00:40:08,360 I'm not really a minister. 716 00:40:08,360 --> 00:40:10,520 I'm Moonface Martin. 717 00:40:14,400 --> 00:40:16,760 HE CLEARS HIS THROAT The famous gangster. 718 00:40:16,760 --> 00:40:19,960 Yeah, public enemy number 13. 719 00:40:21,040 --> 00:40:23,240 SARCASTICALLY: Help. Police. 720 00:40:23,240 --> 00:40:24,480 Shut it, Erma. 721 00:40:24,480 --> 00:40:27,200 Hey, hey, hey! You're not going to turn me in, are you? 722 00:40:27,200 --> 00:40:29,440 Doc, relax, we're pals. Then where you going? 723 00:40:29,440 --> 00:40:32,160 Well, I've got a wedding to bust up. No, you can't go out there. 724 00:40:32,160 --> 00:40:34,720 The captain thinks you're Snake Eyes Johnson. 725 00:40:34,720 --> 00:40:36,720 Hey, what I need is a disguise. 726 00:40:36,720 --> 00:40:40,200 Oh, yeah, what? Like a gorilla suit or a suit of armour or something? 727 00:40:40,200 --> 00:40:42,960 Or a sailor suit. Yeah. You want a sailor suit? 728 00:40:42,960 --> 00:40:44,600 No problem. 729 00:40:44,600 --> 00:40:46,840 BIG BAND MUSIC PLAYS 730 00:40:48,920 --> 00:40:50,320 Hey... 731 00:40:50,320 --> 00:40:52,040 CONVERSATION FADES OUT 732 00:40:58,360 --> 00:41:03,080 ♪ A sailor's life is supposed to be 733 00:41:03,080 --> 00:41:07,440 ♪ A hell of a lot of fun 734 00:41:07,440 --> 00:41:10,280 ♪ Yes, but when you're a sailor 735 00:41:10,280 --> 00:41:12,200 ♪ Take it from me 736 00:41:12,200 --> 00:41:16,480 ♪ You work like a son of a gun 737 00:41:16,480 --> 00:41:20,240 ♪ They give us jobs of every kind 738 00:41:20,240 --> 00:41:23,840 ♪ And chores of every sort 739 00:41:23,840 --> 00:41:29,120 ♪ But sweat away, sailor, you don't mind 740 00:41:29,120 --> 00:41:32,800 ALL: # Cos you know when you hit port 741 00:41:33,800 --> 00:41:39,920 ♪ There will always be a lady fair 742 00:41:39,920 --> 00:41:43,120 ♪ A Jenny fair or a Sadie fair 743 00:41:43,120 --> 00:41:46,200 ♪ There will always be a lady fair 744 00:41:46,200 --> 00:41:49,000 ♪ Who's waiting there for you 745 00:41:49,000 --> 00:41:52,600 ♪ There will always be a lady fair 746 00:41:52,600 --> 00:41:55,520 ♪ To smooth your troubles and to muss your hair 747 00:41:55,520 --> 00:41:58,680 ♪ There will always be a lady fair 748 00:41:58,680 --> 00:42:01,440 ♪ Who's waiting there for you... ♪ 749 00:42:01,440 --> 00:42:03,720 Hello, boys! Hey! How is it going? 750 00:42:03,720 --> 00:42:05,640 Ooh! 751 00:42:05,640 --> 00:42:07,640 ERMA LAUGHS 752 00:42:09,520 --> 00:42:11,160 Ooh! Come. 753 00:42:13,400 --> 00:42:17,120 ♪ There will always be a girl's caress 754 00:42:17,120 --> 00:42:20,360 ♪ To change your answer from a no to yes 755 00:42:20,360 --> 00:42:23,160 ♪ There will always be a lady fair 756 00:42:23,160 --> 00:42:25,760 ♪ Who's waiting there for you 757 00:42:25,760 --> 00:42:27,960 ♪ Bam-bam-bam-bam-bam 758 00:42:27,960 --> 00:42:29,640 ♪ Bam-bam bam-bam 759 00:42:29,640 --> 00:42:32,320 ♪ Bam-bam-bam bam-bam ba-ba bam-bam-bam 760 00:42:32,320 --> 00:42:35,520 ♪ Bam-bam bam-bam Bam-bam bam-bam 761 00:42:35,520 --> 00:42:37,840 ♪ Bam-bam bam-bam bam-bam. ♪ 762 00:42:37,840 --> 00:42:39,320 You're next. 763 00:42:39,320 --> 00:42:44,120 Sailor? Yes, sir. Keep this quiet. He is public enemy number one. 764 00:42:44,120 --> 00:42:47,280 We don't want to set off a panic amongst the passengers. 765 00:42:47,280 --> 00:42:50,760 You check the foredeck and report to me on the bridge. Aye, aye, sir. 766 00:42:50,760 --> 00:42:54,720 And remember, he is a master of disguise. 767 00:43:00,000 --> 00:43:03,880 This is ridiculous. These pants must be six inches too short. 768 00:43:03,880 --> 00:43:08,680 Yeah, I don't think Erma picked the guy for the length of his pants. 769 00:43:08,680 --> 00:43:09,840 Pull! GUNSHOT 770 00:43:09,840 --> 00:43:13,400 Don't shoot! I'm... Hallelujah the Lord. 771 00:43:13,400 --> 00:43:15,520 Excuse me, sir, what was that noise? 772 00:43:15,520 --> 00:43:19,280 That was the trapshooting contest. Crapshooting contest? 773 00:43:19,280 --> 00:43:23,640 Skeet shooting, Doctor. Yeah. First prize is $100. 774 00:43:23,640 --> 00:43:26,240 Whoa! Hey, can you use your own gun? 775 00:43:28,360 --> 00:43:31,160 Of course. Yeah, see you later. Hey, wait a minute! 776 00:43:31,160 --> 00:43:32,320 Ahem! Wait! 777 00:43:35,240 --> 00:43:36,600 Pull! GUNSHOT 778 00:43:36,600 --> 00:43:37,760 Miss! 779 00:43:37,760 --> 00:43:41,240 {\an8}Really, mother, we didn't lose all our money in the crash. 780 00:43:41,240 --> 00:43:43,720 Why, if I changed my mind right now 781 00:43:43,720 --> 00:43:47,560 and decided not to marry Evelyn, we'd be fine. 782 00:43:47,560 --> 00:43:49,840 We would not be fine! 783 00:43:53,640 --> 00:43:56,000 You too haven't quarrelled, have you? 784 00:43:56,000 --> 00:43:57,560 Oh, dear! 785 00:44:03,960 --> 00:44:05,880 I'm going to marry him, mother. 786 00:44:05,880 --> 00:44:08,160 Everything will be all right. Oh, good. 787 00:44:08,160 --> 00:44:09,440 Pull! GUNSHOT 788 00:44:09,440 --> 00:44:10,640 Miss! 789 00:44:10,640 --> 00:44:12,480 Pull! GUNSHOT 790 00:44:12,480 --> 00:44:14,640 Miss! Pull! MACHINEGUN FIRES 791 00:44:14,640 --> 00:44:16,440 EVERYONE SCREAMS 792 00:44:17,600 --> 00:44:20,240 MOONFACE HUMS 793 00:44:22,840 --> 00:44:24,640 Hey, hey, yeah! 794 00:44:28,040 --> 00:44:31,280 Excuse me, ma'am, are you Mrs Evangeline Harcourt? 795 00:44:31,280 --> 00:44:34,720 Why, yes. Oh, no. The captain has asked me to find you. 796 00:44:34,720 --> 00:44:38,080 The ship has hit an iceberg. 797 00:44:38,080 --> 00:44:40,240 SHE SCREAMS 798 00:44:40,240 --> 00:44:42,400 Ssh! 799 00:44:42,400 --> 00:44:44,240 All the lifeboats are leaking except one, 800 00:44:44,240 --> 00:44:47,560 the captain is saving the last two places for you and your daughter. 801 00:44:47,560 --> 00:44:50,080 Billy, this isn't fair. Who cares if it's fair? 802 00:44:50,080 --> 00:44:52,680 The ship is sinking. I'm going to... 803 00:44:52,680 --> 00:44:55,920 Oh, do I have time to go back for my jewellery? 804 00:44:55,920 --> 00:44:58,920 Hurry, and remember, not a word to anyone. 805 00:45:00,400 --> 00:45:02,480 I hope you're proud of yourself, Billy. 806 00:45:02,480 --> 00:45:04,160 Now that you mention it, I am. 807 00:45:04,160 --> 00:45:06,720 12 hours after you tell me to leave you alone forever, 808 00:45:06,720 --> 00:45:08,920 I've got you all to myself. 809 00:45:08,920 --> 00:45:10,800 Oops, sorry, madam. 810 00:45:10,800 --> 00:45:14,720 Not quite all to yourself. Good morning, Mr Whitney. 811 00:45:14,720 --> 00:45:17,840 Oh, hello, my dear. Yeah, I'm looking for a sailor. 812 00:45:17,840 --> 00:45:21,440 Take a look at this one. Ah, now, I want to send a wire. 813 00:45:21,440 --> 00:45:25,120 This goes to William Crocker, Whitney Building, New York City. 814 00:45:25,120 --> 00:45:29,200 "Crocker, wire confirmation of amalgamated sale at once." 815 00:45:29,200 --> 00:45:32,520 Got that? Mm-hm. Better have him read it back. 816 00:45:34,480 --> 00:45:36,960 HIGH-PITCHED: "Crocker, wire confirmation 817 00:45:36,960 --> 00:45:39,200 "of amalgamated sale at once." 818 00:45:39,200 --> 00:45:43,040 You know, you remind me of somebody. Look out! 819 00:45:44,520 --> 00:45:47,360 What was that? The biggest seagull I ever saw! 820 00:45:47,360 --> 00:45:48,840 What? 821 00:45:48,840 --> 00:45:51,920 Oh! Got to run! I'll see you later! 822 00:45:59,600 --> 00:46:01,920 They've gone! 823 00:46:01,920 --> 00:46:04,120 Oh, captain, thank God! 824 00:46:04,120 --> 00:46:06,240 Where do I go? 825 00:46:08,440 --> 00:46:10,360 Where would you like to go? 826 00:46:12,320 --> 00:46:16,680 The lifeboat. Oh, the lifeboat drill is tomorrow morning, madam. 827 00:46:16,680 --> 00:46:19,080 But the sailor told us... Told you what? 828 00:46:19,080 --> 00:46:20,600 That the ship is sinking. 829 00:46:20,600 --> 00:46:24,360 What?! A joke, ladies and gentlemen. 830 00:46:24,360 --> 00:46:27,320 She's only joshing. HE CHUCKLES 831 00:46:28,720 --> 00:46:32,600 I suggest you have a little talk with the ship's doctor, madam. 832 00:46:32,600 --> 00:46:35,760 And in the meantime, stay out of the bar. 833 00:46:37,680 --> 00:46:42,200 Go on, go on, just do what I told you. But what if it's...? 834 00:46:44,640 --> 00:46:50,080 Excuse me, Father. Yeah? Can I assist you in some way, my son? 835 00:46:50,080 --> 00:46:52,920 Brother Luke has been playing cards... Mm-hm. 836 00:46:52,920 --> 00:46:55,200 Look. Yeah, that's the wages of sin. 837 00:46:55,200 --> 00:46:58,000 For shame, go hail a few Marys, will you? 838 00:46:58,000 --> 00:47:00,600 So, you've been playing cards, yeah? LUKE CHUCKLES 839 00:47:00,600 --> 00:47:02,800 Can you shoot craps? 840 00:47:02,800 --> 00:47:05,520 No. Kneel, Christian. Watch closely. 841 00:47:05,520 --> 00:47:08,360 Right, put up your money. I've put up my money. 842 00:47:08,360 --> 00:47:09,640 I throw a number. 843 00:47:09,640 --> 00:47:12,240 If I throw the same number before I throw a seven, I win. 844 00:47:12,240 --> 00:47:14,040 If not, you win. 845 00:47:14,040 --> 00:47:15,520 Bah! 846 00:47:15,520 --> 00:47:17,080 Craps! I win. 847 00:47:17,080 --> 00:47:18,960 JOHN AND LUKE LAUGH 848 00:47:21,640 --> 00:47:23,800 There's something wrong here. 849 00:47:23,800 --> 00:47:27,040 {\an8}Hey, thanks a lot. Yeah, don't mention it. What did I do? 850 00:47:27,040 --> 00:47:28,280 {\an8}You walked out on me. 851 00:47:28,280 --> 00:47:29,880 I nearly got nailed by my boss, 852 00:47:29,880 --> 00:47:33,040 and everyone's pointing at me in this stupid disguise. 853 00:47:33,040 --> 00:47:36,400 Don't knock the disguise! Come on, it's practically as good as mine. 854 00:47:36,400 --> 00:47:38,120 Hey, Billy, how you doing? Uh-huh... 855 00:47:38,120 --> 00:47:40,280 Moonface Martin, long time, no see! 856 00:47:40,280 --> 00:47:42,080 Reno, quiet! OK, quiet! 857 00:47:42,080 --> 00:47:44,160 You don't know me. I'm a hunted man. 858 00:47:44,160 --> 00:47:46,120 Oh, there he is! Don't shoot! 859 00:47:46,120 --> 00:47:49,200 I'm flying fish, there go the flying fish. My God. 860 00:47:51,880 --> 00:47:54,280 Dr, have you seen Mr Cleaners? Yeah. 861 00:47:54,280 --> 00:47:57,440 As a matter of fact, I think I saw him going into the mizzen mast. 862 00:47:59,840 --> 00:48:03,560 We don't have a mizzen mast. Yeah, must have been someone else. 863 00:48:05,440 --> 00:48:08,040 Sailor, come with me. I want you to help me find someone. 864 00:48:08,040 --> 00:48:09,200 Aye, aye, sir. 865 00:48:10,200 --> 00:48:12,640 Who's he looking for? He's looking for Billy. 866 00:48:13,960 --> 00:48:15,960 Billy ought to be a big help to him. 867 00:48:17,360 --> 00:48:23,440 What-ho! It's Reno Sweeney. I say, Lord Evelyn Oakleigh. 868 00:48:23,440 --> 00:48:25,120 Might I have your autograph? 869 00:48:25,120 --> 00:48:29,120 Why not? Do you know, I spent the most smashing night in your club. 870 00:48:29,120 --> 00:48:31,040 Lawdy lawdy! Saints preserve us! 871 00:48:31,040 --> 00:48:33,400 Your singing stirred me into a frenzy. 872 00:48:33,400 --> 00:48:36,760 Had me dancing about like Bojingles. 873 00:48:36,760 --> 00:48:38,480 Thank you. 874 00:48:38,480 --> 00:48:42,160 "Are you drunk or crazy? Good luck, Reno Sweeney." 875 00:48:46,120 --> 00:48:48,800 Oh, I say, why don't we all have tea in my cabin? 876 00:48:48,800 --> 00:48:51,160 I know that my fiance, Ms Harcourt, would love to meet you. 877 00:48:51,160 --> 00:48:53,120 That's very sweet of you, but I'm afraid that... 878 00:48:53,120 --> 00:48:56,440 Yeah, she'd love to. Oh, marvellous! Shall we say four o'clock? 879 00:48:56,440 --> 00:48:58,440 Four o'clock? Four o'clock? 880 00:48:58,440 --> 00:49:00,640 See you later...elevator. 881 00:49:02,920 --> 00:49:05,840 Mooney, that's the tommy that's been making time with Billy's girl. 882 00:49:05,840 --> 00:49:08,880 This is going to be like consorting with the enemy. Exactly. 883 00:49:08,880 --> 00:49:11,320 Here's the plan, right, you get to his cabin 884 00:49:11,320 --> 00:49:14,640 nice and early wearing something that slips off easy. 885 00:49:14,640 --> 00:49:18,280 I bust in, I catch him tearing your clothes off, 886 00:49:18,280 --> 00:49:21,120 and then we blackmail him into breaking off the engagement. 887 00:49:21,120 --> 00:49:23,840 Moon! That's despicable. You don't like it? 888 00:49:23,840 --> 00:49:25,160 I love it. Yeah, yeah. 889 00:49:26,160 --> 00:49:30,120 Reno, we should have teamed up years ago. 890 00:49:31,560 --> 00:49:35,640 We're two of a kind, all right. Partners. 891 00:49:35,640 --> 00:49:37,560 Through thick or thin. 892 00:49:37,560 --> 00:49:39,680 Night or day. 893 00:49:39,680 --> 00:49:41,960 Right or wrong. 894 00:49:41,960 --> 00:49:45,560 ♪ If you're ever in a jam, here I am 895 00:49:47,240 --> 00:49:50,640 ♪ If you ever need a pal, I'm your gal 896 00:49:52,240 --> 00:49:57,240 ♪ If you ever feel so happy you land in jail, I'm your bail 897 00:49:57,240 --> 00:50:00,760 BOTH: # It's friendship! Friendship! 898 00:50:00,760 --> 00:50:02,800 ♪ Just a perfect blendship 899 00:50:02,800 --> 00:50:05,560 ♪ When other friendships have been forgot 900 00:50:05,560 --> 00:50:07,600 ♪ Ours will still be hot! 901 00:50:07,600 --> 00:50:09,680 ♪ Lahdle-ahdle-ahdle dig-dig-dig! 902 00:50:09,680 --> 00:50:11,120 I'm diggin' that. 903 00:50:15,480 --> 00:50:20,520 ♪ If you're ever down a well, ring my bell 904 00:50:20,520 --> 00:50:23,920 ♪ If you ever catch on fire, send a wire 905 00:50:25,440 --> 00:50:29,560 ♪ If you ever lose your teeth when you're out to dine 906 00:50:29,560 --> 00:50:31,080 ♪ Borrow mine 907 00:50:31,080 --> 00:50:33,480 ♪ It's friendship! Friendship! 908 00:50:33,480 --> 00:50:36,040 ♪ Just a perfect blendship 909 00:50:36,040 --> 00:50:38,880 ♪ When other friendships have ceased to gel 910 00:50:38,880 --> 00:50:41,080 ♪ Ours will still be swell! 911 00:50:41,080 --> 00:50:43,080 ♪ Lahdle-ahdle-ahdle hep-hep-hep! 912 00:50:43,080 --> 00:50:44,640 Oh, I love that. 913 00:50:51,280 --> 00:50:54,760 ♪ If they ever black your eyes, put me wise 914 00:50:56,480 --> 00:50:59,960 ♪ If they ever cook your goose, turn me loose 915 00:51:01,720 --> 00:51:05,240 ♪ If they ever put a bullet through your brain 916 00:51:05,240 --> 00:51:07,280 ♪ I'll complain 917 00:51:07,280 --> 00:51:09,960 ♪ It's friendship! Friendship! 918 00:51:09,960 --> 00:51:12,360 ♪ Just a perfect blendship 919 00:51:12,360 --> 00:51:15,280 ♪ When other friendships go up in smoke 920 00:51:15,280 --> 00:51:17,400 ♪ Ours will still be oke! 921 00:51:17,400 --> 00:51:19,480 ♪ Lahdle-ahdle-ahdle goof-goof-goof! 922 00:51:19,480 --> 00:51:21,200 Ooh, getting stuck now. 923 00:51:25,760 --> 00:51:27,360 Ooh! 924 00:51:30,280 --> 00:51:33,920 ♪ If you ever lose your mind, I'll be kind 925 00:51:33,920 --> 00:51:35,480 ♪ Oh, baby! 926 00:51:35,480 --> 00:51:38,640 ♪ If you ever lose your shirt, I'll be hurt 927 00:51:40,440 --> 00:51:44,440 ♪ If you're ever in a mill and get sawed in half 928 00:51:44,440 --> 00:51:46,320 ♪ Ha! I won't laugh 929 00:51:46,320 --> 00:51:48,760 ♪ It's friendship! Friendship! 930 00:51:48,760 --> 00:51:50,920 ♪ Just a perfect blendship 931 00:51:50,920 --> 00:51:53,920 ♪ When other friendships have been forgate 932 00:51:53,920 --> 00:51:55,920 ♪ Ours will still be great! ♪ 933 00:51:55,920 --> 00:51:57,280 ♪ Lahdle-ahdle-ahd... 934 00:51:57,280 --> 00:51:59,320 You just cut me loudly. 935 00:51:59,320 --> 00:52:00,840 What's going on here? 936 00:52:05,560 --> 00:52:09,400 ♪ If they ever crack your spine, drop a line 937 00:52:09,400 --> 00:52:11,240 MOONFACE WHISTLES 938 00:52:11,240 --> 00:52:14,960 ♪ If they ever cut your throat, write a note 939 00:52:14,960 --> 00:52:16,440 Hey! 940 00:52:16,440 --> 00:52:19,400 ♪ If they ever make a cannibal stew of you 941 00:52:19,400 --> 00:52:21,840 ♪ Invite me too! MOONFACE WHISTLES 942 00:52:21,840 --> 00:52:24,360 ♪ It's friendship! Friendship! 943 00:52:24,360 --> 00:52:26,840 ♪ Just a perfect blendship 944 00:52:26,840 --> 00:52:29,760 ♪ When other friendships are up the crick 945 00:52:29,760 --> 00:52:31,400 ♪ Ours will still be slick! 946 00:52:31,400 --> 00:52:33,360 ♪ Lahdle-ahdle-ahdle... Quack-quack-quack! 947 00:52:33,360 --> 00:52:35,560 No, it's not... Yeah, it's quack. 948 00:52:35,560 --> 00:52:37,440 No, we decided not to do... Always been quack. 949 00:52:37,440 --> 00:52:39,800 Well, yes... Read it then. Read it. Read the lyrics. 950 00:52:39,800 --> 00:52:42,800 They're in the lyrics there. "Quack-quack-quack" No... 951 00:52:42,800 --> 00:52:45,760 No, you're... I don't know, were supposed to be partners. 952 00:52:45,760 --> 00:52:47,960 Yeah, we are partners. And you threw me off there. 953 00:52:47,960 --> 00:52:49,680 Just for the moment, just for the song, OK? 954 00:52:49,680 --> 00:52:52,600 I thought that we were... What's your problem? 955 00:52:53,600 --> 00:52:55,840 What? 956 00:52:55,840 --> 00:52:57,720 Oh, yeah. I forgot about them. 957 00:52:57,720 --> 00:52:59,000 Hi. 958 00:53:02,360 --> 00:53:04,880 What are you waving for? I don't know. They... 959 00:53:04,880 --> 00:53:07,440 I just thought I'd... We're supposed to be at sea. 960 00:53:09,560 --> 00:53:12,040 Look, we've got to come up with a big ending, OK? 961 00:53:12,040 --> 00:53:13,760 I don't like the look of the crowd. 962 00:53:15,160 --> 00:53:16,560 OK. Let's go for it. 963 00:53:16,560 --> 00:53:17,640 OK. 964 00:53:20,640 --> 00:53:22,760 No, I need another breath. 965 00:53:22,760 --> 00:53:25,800 OK, you ready? Oh, yes. Please. 966 00:53:25,800 --> 00:53:30,200 ♪ When other friendships have been forgot 967 00:53:30,200 --> 00:53:35,120 ♪ Ours will still be hot! ♪ 968 00:53:36,600 --> 00:53:37,960 Yeah. No, just a few. 969 00:53:39,000 --> 00:53:40,920 Come on, get it right! I'm just... 970 00:53:40,920 --> 00:53:43,680 How many awards do you get if you get it wrong? I'm just putting... 971 00:53:43,680 --> 00:53:46,720 I don't understand. Put your arms... Why are you pushing me? 972 00:53:52,480 --> 00:53:55,000 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 973 00:53:55,000 --> 00:53:56,880 I think we got them. 974 00:53:56,880 --> 00:53:59,680 You think? Yeah, we got them. It's okay. I feel good now. 975 00:53:59,680 --> 00:54:01,120 They're back on our side. 976 00:54:06,520 --> 00:54:08,080 Hey! 977 00:54:17,480 --> 00:54:19,120 Come on, you know... 978 00:54:19,120 --> 00:54:20,520 Whoa. 979 00:54:20,520 --> 00:54:22,440 OK, OK, OK, OK, OK, OK. 980 00:54:36,720 --> 00:54:38,880 ♪ Kiss me pretty wench 981 00:54:38,880 --> 00:54:40,600 ♪ In English or in French 982 00:54:40,600 --> 00:54:44,240 ♪ Bon voyage, bon voyage. ♪ 983 00:54:44,240 --> 00:54:46,280 KNOCK AT DOOR Ah, come in! 984 00:54:48,200 --> 00:54:51,600 Did you ring, sir? Yes. You might bring me my tea, please. 985 00:54:51,600 --> 00:54:53,160 And step in it. 986 00:54:59,040 --> 00:55:01,720 I'm sorry, sir? Oh, I mean sit on it. 987 00:55:02,800 --> 00:55:06,800 Sir? Oh, gosh. Just bring it right away, will you? Oh, yes, sir. 988 00:55:06,800 --> 00:55:08,520 I'll step ON it. 989 00:55:10,480 --> 00:55:12,280 Step on it? 990 00:55:13,480 --> 00:55:15,280 It makes no sense at all. 991 00:55:15,280 --> 00:55:16,800 KNOCK AT DOOR Ah, come in. 992 00:55:16,800 --> 00:55:18,400 Gosh, I say, you Yanks are fast. 993 00:55:18,400 --> 00:55:20,440 Um, just put it on the bed, will you? 994 00:55:20,440 --> 00:55:22,680 I really wanted it before I started to dress. 995 00:55:22,680 --> 00:55:25,360 I do hope that it's good and hot. Nobody's complained yet. 996 00:55:25,360 --> 00:55:26,600 Oh, dear me! 997 00:55:26,600 --> 00:55:28,640 I say, I thought you were the man with my tea. 998 00:55:28,640 --> 00:55:31,720 Well, what were you going to do if it was cold? Cut off his head? 999 00:55:32,800 --> 00:55:37,320 Oh, you mean Excalibur. Old family heirloom. 1000 00:55:37,320 --> 00:55:40,480 Mother Harcourt wants me to wear it for the wedding. 1001 00:55:40,480 --> 00:55:42,040 You know, it's odd, 1002 00:55:42,040 --> 00:55:44,840 but the old dear's as taken with things English 1003 00:55:44,840 --> 00:55:46,960 as I am with things American. 1004 00:55:46,960 --> 00:55:48,520 Well, I'm glad you feel that way, 1005 00:55:48,520 --> 00:55:53,480 because this American certainly feels gaga about you. 1006 00:55:53,480 --> 00:55:57,320 Gaga? I'm not sure I follow. 1007 00:55:57,320 --> 00:55:59,480 Does this make it any clearer? 1008 00:55:59,480 --> 00:56:00,840 Oh, marvellous. 1009 00:56:02,600 --> 00:56:08,280 "To feel gaga about a person means to rub his neck." 1010 00:56:08,280 --> 00:56:12,400 No, you don't understand. I mean, you do things to me. 1011 00:56:12,400 --> 00:56:14,080 Do things to you? 1012 00:56:14,080 --> 00:56:16,880 I mean, you send me... Send you where? 1013 00:56:16,880 --> 00:56:19,400 One look at you and I get hot pants. 1014 00:56:19,400 --> 00:56:22,000 Oh, dear me. Would a bit of ice do any good? 1015 00:56:22,000 --> 00:56:24,560 Evie, "hot pants" means that I'm crazy about you. 1016 00:56:25,920 --> 00:56:29,560 "Hot pants means that you're crazy about me." 1017 00:56:31,400 --> 00:56:32,720 Oh, smashing. 1018 00:56:32,720 --> 00:56:36,000 Because I think you're the absolute rat's pyjamas. Ha! 1019 00:56:37,360 --> 00:56:39,720 Oh. Oh, I say, um... 1020 00:56:41,720 --> 00:56:43,640 Is something funny? 1021 00:56:43,640 --> 00:56:47,280 Yeah, but it's also kind of cute. OK, what's going on in here?! 1022 00:56:47,280 --> 00:56:48,400 Aha! 1023 00:56:48,400 --> 00:56:51,480 So, this is what I find, huh? Oh, you beast. 1024 00:56:51,480 --> 00:56:55,040 You animal, you despoiling of innocent girlhood. 1025 00:56:55,040 --> 00:56:56,640 Look at this poor child. Look at her. 1026 00:56:56,640 --> 00:57:00,240 Her clothes torn off by your fiendish attack. 1027 00:57:00,240 --> 00:57:02,120 Standing there in all her nakedness. 1028 00:57:04,000 --> 00:57:05,640 There's something wrong here. 1029 00:57:06,640 --> 00:57:09,120 There's nothing wrong here. Just hold on a minute, Moonface. 1030 00:57:09,120 --> 00:57:11,760 No, do you think your girlfriend's going to marry you after this? 1031 00:57:11,760 --> 00:57:14,800 And don't think she won't know, because I am going to tell her. 1032 00:57:14,800 --> 00:57:15,920 Oh, do, do. 1033 00:57:15,920 --> 00:57:18,880 Only make it a bit thicker, she does complain that I lack fervour. 1034 00:57:18,880 --> 00:57:21,080 Hang on, buster, you've got the wrong attitude here. 1035 00:57:21,080 --> 00:57:24,640 You're talking to a very dangerous man. Oh, go on, Padre. 1036 00:57:24,640 --> 00:57:26,920 You're an old sweetheart, and you know it! 1037 00:57:26,920 --> 00:57:29,920 OK, I'm going to prove to you how dangerous I am, OK? 1038 00:57:29,920 --> 00:57:31,400 I'll show you. 1039 00:57:31,400 --> 00:57:32,760 Yeah. 1040 00:57:36,040 --> 00:57:38,240 Do you mind waiting here? I won't be long. 1041 00:57:40,960 --> 00:57:44,400 You know, I have noticed that these clergy sometimes go a bit off. 1042 00:57:44,400 --> 00:57:47,080 Oh, Evie, there's something I've got to tell you. 1043 00:57:47,080 --> 00:57:49,040 This was a set-up. 1044 00:57:49,040 --> 00:57:51,840 A set-up? We were going to frame you. 1045 00:57:51,840 --> 00:57:56,040 Frame me? He was supposed to bust in and catch us in a... 1046 00:57:57,240 --> 00:57:58,360 Clinch! 1047 00:57:59,920 --> 00:58:01,240 Oh, I say. 1048 00:58:02,320 --> 00:58:05,800 You mean, he thought I was going to make love to you? 1049 00:58:05,800 --> 00:58:07,320 That was the idea. 1050 00:58:09,160 --> 00:58:11,280 Oh, that is exciting! 1051 00:58:12,920 --> 00:58:16,160 You mean to say that he thought that you and...? OK, right! 1052 00:58:16,160 --> 00:58:18,760 Does this prove how serious this is? Moon, are you nuts? 1053 00:58:18,760 --> 00:58:20,440 Put that thing down. No. Put it down! 1054 00:58:20,440 --> 00:58:22,160 No! Down! Ooh! 1055 00:58:22,160 --> 00:58:24,120 It's all right, Padre. 1056 00:58:24,120 --> 00:58:26,560 You thought that I'd take advantage of Miss Sweeney here, 1057 00:58:26,560 --> 00:58:28,040 and you came to her rescue. 1058 00:58:28,040 --> 00:58:32,200 And I admire you for it. I really admire you enormously. 1059 00:58:32,200 --> 00:58:33,920 Ooh, what's the expression? 1060 00:58:33,920 --> 00:58:35,040 Oh! 1061 00:58:35,040 --> 00:58:37,440 I've got hot pants for you! 1062 00:58:39,000 --> 00:58:41,040 You come any closer and I'll shoot! 1063 00:58:42,680 --> 00:58:44,880 BIG BAND MUSIC PLAYS 1064 00:58:55,320 --> 00:58:57,600 DOG BARKS 1065 00:58:57,600 --> 00:58:59,360 I'm so sorry! 1066 00:59:01,760 --> 00:59:05,360 {\an8}Evening, folks! I trust you're enjoying the crossing. 1067 00:59:05,360 --> 00:59:08,440 This is the dullest passenger list I've ever seen. 1068 00:59:08,440 --> 00:59:12,280 There's nobody on board but nobodies. No celebrities. 1069 00:59:12,280 --> 00:59:17,120 I want celebrities! Oh, well, um, how about... 1070 00:59:17,120 --> 00:59:20,360 ..Gertrude Ederle? The Channel swimmer? 1071 00:59:20,360 --> 00:59:23,920 Is she onboard? Not exactly, but there she goes. 1072 00:59:25,080 --> 00:59:27,560 Well, I never! What does he take us for? 1073 00:59:27,560 --> 00:59:29,560 It's like crossing on a tug boat. 1074 00:59:29,560 --> 00:59:31,720 Next time, I'm booking with Cunard. 1075 00:59:32,920 --> 00:59:34,520 What does Hope see in that guy? 1076 00:59:34,520 --> 00:59:36,240 Hey, it must be her mother. 1077 00:59:36,240 --> 00:59:39,680 Yeah. She's the one behind all this. Hey, I could shoot the mother. 1078 00:59:39,680 --> 00:59:41,800 Moon! No, OK, I got another plan. 1079 00:59:41,800 --> 00:59:44,120 Yeah, well, I hope it's better than the last one. 1080 00:59:44,120 --> 00:59:47,840 Any sign of that criminal yet, men? Not yet, sir. 1081 00:59:47,840 --> 00:59:51,400 Apprehend that man immediately. BOTH: Aye, aye, sir. 1082 00:59:51,400 --> 00:59:56,360 And if you see any celebrities, apprehend them too. Yes, sir. 1083 00:59:56,360 --> 00:59:58,640 Hey, did you hear that? 1084 00:59:58,640 --> 01:00:01,000 I gotta do something about this disguise. Whoa! 1085 01:00:01,000 --> 01:00:02,760 Stay out of the kitchen 1086 01:00:02,760 --> 01:00:04,840 or I'll put you on the menu. 1087 01:00:04,840 --> 01:00:07,240 Sailor, find out who this belongs to. 1088 01:00:07,240 --> 01:00:08,680 Aye-aye, sir. 1089 01:00:08,680 --> 01:00:11,680 Now, if only I had a beard or a phoney moustache. 1090 01:00:18,800 --> 01:00:22,560 Whoo! 1091 01:00:22,560 --> 01:00:30,160 Cheeky! Oh... 1092 01:00:30,160 --> 01:00:32,000 Where is that dog? 1093 01:00:32,000 --> 01:00:34,960 Now, now. They always find their way home. 1094 01:00:34,960 --> 01:00:38,720 His home is in Oyster Bay, Long Island. 1095 01:00:38,720 --> 01:00:40,680 Be calm, my dear. 1096 01:00:40,680 --> 01:00:43,080 Oh, you're a trembling fawn. 1097 01:00:43,080 --> 01:00:44,840 Here, have a snort. 1098 01:00:44,840 --> 01:00:48,720 I told you, Eli, liquor has never touched my lips. 1099 01:00:49,840 --> 01:00:51,720 You know a shortcut? 1100 01:00:53,360 --> 01:00:57,520 Cheeky! Come here, doggie. 1101 01:00:57,520 --> 01:00:59,160 Cheeky! Oh, Evangeline. 1102 01:00:59,160 --> 01:01:01,400 Just look at the moon, huh? 1103 01:01:02,560 --> 01:01:05,960 This night was made for romance, my sweet. 1104 01:01:09,760 --> 01:01:12,080 Will you marry me? 1105 01:01:17,000 --> 01:01:20,120 I'm afraid I can't, sir. I'm already married. What? 1106 01:01:20,120 --> 01:01:23,560 But there is a lady round the corner looking for a dog... 1107 01:01:23,560 --> 01:01:26,200 Why don't you try her? Yeah. Um... Thank you. 1108 01:01:26,200 --> 01:01:27,880 You're welcome. 1109 01:01:34,800 --> 01:01:36,640 How does it feel...? Cheeky! 1110 01:01:36,640 --> 01:01:37,960 DOG BARKS 1111 01:01:37,960 --> 01:01:40,720 Quick, get rid of him! What do you do with a dog? 1112 01:01:40,720 --> 01:01:43,600 Just get rid of him. I know, I'll put him down here. 1113 01:01:45,640 --> 01:01:47,520 Stop. Stop, stop. 1114 01:01:49,200 --> 01:01:52,760 Oh, where is that dog? 1115 01:01:52,760 --> 01:01:54,040 Cheeky! 1116 01:01:54,040 --> 01:01:55,920 DOG BARKS 1117 01:01:55,920 --> 01:01:57,480 Agh! 1118 01:02:01,520 --> 01:02:03,760 Dear me. Are you all right? 1119 01:02:03,760 --> 01:02:06,120 Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine now. 1120 01:02:06,120 --> 01:02:08,800 Oh, Captain! Captain, thank God! 1121 01:02:08,800 --> 01:02:10,960 I need your help. 1122 01:02:10,960 --> 01:02:13,240 What is it this time, madam? 1123 01:02:13,240 --> 01:02:16,760 I can't find my little Cheeky. 1124 01:02:16,760 --> 01:02:19,840 Why, it's right beside your little nosy! 1125 01:02:22,000 --> 01:02:23,480 SHE SOBS 1126 01:02:23,480 --> 01:02:24,880 DOG BARKS 1127 01:02:24,880 --> 01:02:26,520 Ohh! SPLASH 1128 01:02:26,520 --> 01:02:28,440 How could you do that? 1129 01:02:28,440 --> 01:02:30,600 Oh, relax. Dogs are good swimmers. 1130 01:02:30,600 --> 01:02:32,280 This way, men! 1131 01:02:33,800 --> 01:02:36,360 We'll check the library, then the ballroom. 1132 01:02:36,360 --> 01:02:39,080 He's got to be on board somewhere. 1133 01:02:39,080 --> 01:02:41,280 Ka-ta! Ka-ta! 1134 01:02:51,120 --> 01:02:52,760 HE CLEARS HIS THROAT 1135 01:02:52,760 --> 01:02:55,280 Are you sure this is going to work? 1136 01:02:55,280 --> 01:02:58,720 Look, come on. Do you want me to take care of the mother or not? 1137 01:02:58,720 --> 01:03:00,120 Here she is. 1138 01:03:00,120 --> 01:03:02,600 COCKNEY ACCENT: Excuse me, miss. 1139 01:03:02,600 --> 01:03:05,200 We're from old London town. 1140 01:03:06,560 --> 01:03:10,120 And we're looking for Lord Evelyn Oakleigh. Do you know him? 1141 01:03:10,120 --> 01:03:12,880 I should say so. He's going to marry my daughter. 1142 01:03:12,880 --> 01:03:14,280 BOTH: Oh, no! 1143 01:03:14,280 --> 01:03:15,720 Is something wrong? 1144 01:03:15,720 --> 01:03:17,440 Allow me to introduce myself. 1145 01:03:17,440 --> 01:03:19,480 I am Lord Evelyn Oakleigh. 1146 01:03:19,480 --> 01:03:22,400 The man you think you know as Lord Evelyn Oakleigh 1147 01:03:22,400 --> 01:03:24,520 is, in reality, my brother. 1148 01:03:24,520 --> 01:03:26,440 Edna. Edna. 1149 01:03:26,440 --> 01:03:29,400 Your brother Edna? That's right. 1150 01:03:29,400 --> 01:03:32,640 His real name's Mona, but he changed it, you see, 1151 01:03:32,640 --> 01:03:35,040 cos he's a bit deranged, you know? 1152 01:03:35,040 --> 01:03:38,440 Several months ago, he escaped from the family suite at Bedlam. 1153 01:03:38,440 --> 01:03:41,000 You have a family suite at Bedlam? That's right. 1154 01:03:41,000 --> 01:03:44,200 I was driving him down to Savile Row for his new straitjacket 1155 01:03:44,200 --> 01:03:47,880 and suddenly, blinky-blonky, didn't half give me the slip, he did. 1156 01:03:48,880 --> 01:03:50,440 Who is this man? 1157 01:03:50,440 --> 01:03:52,600 Oh! My brother's keeper. Oh, dear me. 1158 01:03:52,600 --> 01:03:54,800 Oh, this is most upsetting. 1159 01:03:54,800 --> 01:03:57,720 It's all right. Don't worry. We know how to handle him. 1160 01:03:57,720 --> 01:04:00,320 Oh, yes. We have been through this a million times. 1161 01:04:00,320 --> 01:04:02,080 You mean this has happened before? 1162 01:04:02,080 --> 01:04:03,640 Oh, yeah, yeah. 1163 01:04:03,640 --> 01:04:07,160 He marries 'em, murders 'em, marries 'em and murders 'em. Ohh! 1164 01:04:07,160 --> 01:04:09,120 Murders their mothers. 1165 01:04:09,120 --> 01:04:10,680 Ohh! 1166 01:04:10,680 --> 01:04:14,480 But he seemed so normal. No... They all say that! 1167 01:04:14,480 --> 01:04:17,160 She doesn't know the signs. The telltale signs. 1168 01:04:17,160 --> 01:04:19,880 The fatal signs. The fatal signs. What signs? 1169 01:04:19,880 --> 01:04:22,480 There's a certain phrase he uses. Just before he snaps. 1170 01:04:22,480 --> 01:04:25,480 Have you ever heard him say...? What-ho! BOTH: That's it! 1171 01:04:25,480 --> 01:04:28,960 Edna... Ssh! I mean, Evelyn! 1172 01:04:28,960 --> 01:04:31,040 I've been looking everywhere for you, Mums. 1173 01:04:31,040 --> 01:04:33,000 I say, how do you like it? 1174 01:04:33,000 --> 01:04:34,840 Agh! Jesus Christ! 1175 01:04:34,840 --> 01:04:37,800 Dear me, is she all right? She's all right. She's just playing dead. 1176 01:04:37,800 --> 01:04:41,280 Oh, my God, Mother! Mother! Billy, what have you done? 1177 01:04:41,280 --> 01:04:42,880 Hope, I can explain everything. 1178 01:04:42,880 --> 01:04:45,360 You just don't know when to stop, do you, Billy? 1179 01:04:45,360 --> 01:04:47,720 His name isn't Billy, dear. It's Evelyn. 1180 01:04:47,720 --> 01:04:49,440 And Evelyn isn't Evelyn. 1181 01:04:49,440 --> 01:04:51,000 He's Edna. 1182 01:04:52,560 --> 01:04:55,720 And Edna's really Mona. I'll show you who he is! 1183 01:04:55,720 --> 01:04:58,920 It's him! Hey, he's getting away! 1184 01:04:58,920 --> 01:05:00,240 Come on, after him! 1185 01:05:00,240 --> 01:05:03,200 Evelyn, will you please take Mrs Harcourt back to her cabin? 1186 01:05:03,200 --> 01:05:06,600 Right-ho. Oh, dear me. What else can go wrong? 1187 01:05:06,600 --> 01:05:08,320 There, there, Mums. Cheer up. 1188 01:05:08,320 --> 01:05:10,400 Woof! Woof! Oh... 1189 01:05:10,400 --> 01:05:12,200 Cheeky! 1190 01:05:13,680 --> 01:05:16,280 How long are you going to keep up this ridiculous act? 1191 01:05:16,280 --> 01:05:18,760 I beg your pardon? You're in love with him. 1192 01:05:18,760 --> 01:05:21,480 Why don't you just admit it? I really don't think that this is... 1193 01:05:21,480 --> 01:05:24,320 He may want you now, but he's not going to stick around for ever. 1194 01:05:24,320 --> 01:05:26,400 Half the women in New York are crazy about him. 1195 01:05:26,400 --> 01:05:29,160 Why, just the other night, one of the best-looking dames I know 1196 01:05:29,160 --> 01:05:32,000 practically proposed to him. She did? Well, who was she? 1197 01:05:32,000 --> 01:05:33,360 Me. 1198 01:05:47,120 --> 01:05:48,800 SHE SOBS 1199 01:05:51,480 --> 01:05:53,680 Oh, I'm sorry. Forgive me. 1200 01:05:53,680 --> 01:05:55,080 I just can't help it. 1201 01:05:55,080 --> 01:05:56,640 Eh? 1202 01:05:56,640 --> 01:05:59,920 SHOUTS: I said, I just can't help it! 1203 01:05:59,920 --> 01:06:03,640 Oh, if only I'd have told him how I really feel... 1204 01:06:03,640 --> 01:06:05,080 How's that? 1205 01:06:06,360 --> 01:06:08,640 I'm crazy about him. 1206 01:06:08,640 --> 01:06:10,000 Eh? 1207 01:06:10,000 --> 01:06:12,320 SHOUTS: I said, I'm crazy about him! 1208 01:06:12,320 --> 01:06:14,560 This is tragic. 1209 01:06:14,560 --> 01:06:18,000 I've ruined my life! I've ruined his life! 1210 01:06:18,000 --> 01:06:20,040 I've ruined everything. 1211 01:06:20,040 --> 01:06:23,800 Oh, things don't look that bad to me. 1212 01:06:23,800 --> 01:06:27,320 ♪ The night is young 1213 01:06:27,320 --> 01:06:29,280 ♪ The skies are clear 1214 01:06:29,280 --> 01:06:34,440 ♪ And if you wanna go walking, dear 1215 01:06:34,440 --> 01:06:37,080 ♪ It's delightful 1216 01:06:37,080 --> 01:06:39,080 ♪ It's delicious 1217 01:06:39,080 --> 01:06:41,160 ♪ It's de-lovely 1218 01:06:42,720 --> 01:06:47,240 ♪ I understand the reason why you're sentimental 1219 01:06:47,240 --> 01:06:49,120 ♪ Cos so am I 1220 01:06:49,120 --> 01:06:50,760 ♪ It's delightful 1221 01:06:50,760 --> 01:06:52,200 ♪ It's delicious 1222 01:06:52,200 --> 01:06:54,480 ♪ It's de-lovely 1223 01:06:54,480 --> 01:06:57,720 ♪ You can tell at a glance 1224 01:06:57,720 --> 01:07:01,240 ♪ What a swell night this is for romance 1225 01:07:01,240 --> 01:07:05,400 ♪ You can hear dear Mother Nature murmuring low 1226 01:07:05,400 --> 01:07:07,200 ♪ Let yourself go 1227 01:07:07,200 --> 01:07:10,360 ♪ So please be sweet, my chickadee 1228 01:07:10,360 --> 01:07:13,080 ♪ And when I kiss you just say to me 1229 01:07:13,080 --> 01:07:14,640 ♪ It's delightful 1230 01:07:14,640 --> 01:07:16,160 ♪ It's delicious 1231 01:07:16,160 --> 01:07:17,760 ♪ It's delectable 1232 01:07:17,760 --> 01:07:19,360 ♪ It's delirious 1233 01:07:19,360 --> 01:07:20,640 ♪ It's dilemma 1234 01:07:20,640 --> 01:07:22,000 ♪ It's de-limit 1235 01:07:22,000 --> 01:07:24,280 ♪ It's deluxe, it's de-lovely 1236 01:07:25,760 --> 01:07:29,040 ♪ I feel a sudden urge to sing 1237 01:07:29,040 --> 01:07:32,520 ♪ The kind of ditty that invokes the spring 1238 01:07:32,520 --> 01:07:35,640 ♪ So control your desire to curse 1239 01:07:35,640 --> 01:07:39,000 ♪ While I crucify the verse 1240 01:07:39,000 --> 01:07:42,840 ♪ This verse you've started seems to me 1241 01:07:42,840 --> 01:07:46,440 ♪ The tinpantithesis of melody 1242 01:07:46,440 --> 01:07:49,800 ♪ So spare me please the pain 1243 01:07:49,800 --> 01:07:52,320 ♪ Just skip the damn thing 1244 01:07:52,320 --> 01:07:55,680 ♪ And sing the refrain 1245 01:07:55,680 --> 01:07:58,120 ♪ Mi-mi-mi-mi 1246 01:07:58,120 --> 01:07:59,920 ♪ Re-re-re-re 1247 01:07:59,920 --> 01:08:04,640 ♪ Do, sol, mi, do, la, si 1248 01:08:04,640 --> 01:08:07,800 ♪ The night is young The skies are clear 1249 01:08:07,800 --> 01:08:10,880 ♪ And if you want to go walking, dear 1250 01:08:10,880 --> 01:08:12,320 ♪ It's delightful 1251 01:08:12,320 --> 01:08:13,760 ♪ It's delicious 1252 01:08:13,760 --> 01:08:15,600 ♪ It's de-lovely 1253 01:08:16,600 --> 01:08:20,880 ♪ I understand the reason why you're sentimental 1254 01:08:20,880 --> 01:08:22,680 ♪ Cos so am I 1255 01:08:22,680 --> 01:08:24,160 ♪ It's delightful 1256 01:08:24,160 --> 01:08:25,720 ♪ It's delicious 1257 01:08:25,720 --> 01:08:28,000 ♪ It's de-lovely 1258 01:08:28,000 --> 01:08:31,480 ♪ You can tell at a glance 1259 01:08:31,480 --> 01:08:34,880 ♪ What a swell night this is for romance 1260 01:08:34,880 --> 01:08:39,720 ♪ You can hear dear Mother Nature murmuring low 1261 01:08:39,720 --> 01:08:41,400 BOTH: # Let yourself go 1262 01:08:41,400 --> 01:08:44,120 ♪ So please be sweet, my chickadee 1263 01:08:44,120 --> 01:08:46,680 ♪ And when I kiss you just say to me 1264 01:08:46,680 --> 01:08:48,720 ♪ It's divine, dear 1265 01:08:48,720 --> 01:08:50,360 ♪ It's diveen, dear 1266 01:08:50,360 --> 01:08:51,920 ♪ It's de-wunderbar 1267 01:08:51,920 --> 01:08:53,480 ♪ It's de-victory 1268 01:08:53,480 --> 01:08:56,320 ♪ It's de vallop, it's de vinner It's de voiks 1269 01:08:56,320 --> 01:08:58,640 ♪ It's de-lovely 1270 01:12:06,280 --> 01:12:09,920 ♪ So please be sweet 1271 01:12:10,960 --> 01:12:12,920 ♪ My chickadee 1272 01:12:13,920 --> 01:12:18,960 ♪ And when I kiss you just say to me 1273 01:12:20,880 --> 01:12:23,480 ♪ It's delightful 1274 01:12:23,480 --> 01:12:26,440 ♪ It's delicious 1275 01:12:41,840 --> 01:12:51,400 ♪ It's de-lovely... ♪ 1276 01:12:51,400 --> 01:12:53,880 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 1277 01:13:04,160 --> 01:13:06,360 Hope! 1278 01:13:06,360 --> 01:13:08,600 Oh, Hope! 1279 01:13:08,600 --> 01:13:10,080 My God, Mother! 1280 01:13:10,080 --> 01:13:12,000 Oh, Hope, there you are! 1281 01:13:12,000 --> 01:13:14,840 Cable from Claridge's. 1282 01:13:14,840 --> 01:13:19,440 Do we want cognac or Cointreau in the wedding cake? 1283 01:13:19,440 --> 01:13:21,240 The wedding cake? Of course. 1284 01:13:21,240 --> 01:13:24,040 I'll have to find out what the groom wants. 1285 01:13:24,040 --> 01:13:26,280 Well, cognac, Cointreau... 1286 01:13:26,280 --> 01:13:28,280 Whatever makes you happy, Mom. 1287 01:13:29,400 --> 01:13:31,200 Mom? Billy, stop it. 1288 01:13:31,200 --> 01:13:33,760 No, you're right, you're right. No more kidding around. 1289 01:13:33,760 --> 01:13:37,000 Mrs Harcourt, Hope has something she needs to tell you. 1290 01:13:37,000 --> 01:13:38,640 Honey, you're on. Honey? 1291 01:13:38,640 --> 01:13:40,880 Hope, what's this all about? 1292 01:13:40,880 --> 01:13:43,200 Go on, tell her, baby. The world won't end. I can't. 1293 01:13:43,200 --> 01:13:46,200 All right, I'll tell her. No! Look, Hope, I understand how hard this is 1294 01:13:46,200 --> 01:13:48,680 for you, but you have choose. I say! 1295 01:13:48,680 --> 01:13:51,720 Anyone have hot pants for a game of shuffleboard? 1296 01:13:51,720 --> 01:13:54,040 Captain, it's him! Don't just stand there! 1297 01:13:54,040 --> 01:13:56,120 THEY ALL SHOUT AT ONCE 1298 01:13:56,120 --> 01:13:59,160 We've got him, ladies and gentlemen, no cause for alarm. 1299 01:13:59,160 --> 01:14:02,120 Ladies and gentlemen, 1300 01:14:02,120 --> 01:14:04,920 the man we've just arrested 1301 01:14:04,920 --> 01:14:07,600 is Snake Eyes Johnson, 1302 01:14:07,600 --> 01:14:09,760 public enemy number one. 1303 01:14:09,760 --> 01:14:12,080 ALL: Ooh! 1304 01:14:12,080 --> 01:14:13,640 Take him away, men. 1305 01:14:13,640 --> 01:14:15,360 ALL: Aw... 1306 01:14:15,360 --> 01:14:18,240 You idiot! Release that man! ALL: Yay! 1307 01:14:18,240 --> 01:14:21,920 But I thought you wanted him clapped in irons? Clapped in irons?! 1308 01:14:21,920 --> 01:14:26,040 A celebrity like Snake Eyes Johnson? 1309 01:14:26,040 --> 01:14:28,320 Let me get this straight. 1310 01:14:28,320 --> 01:14:31,080 If I'm just a stowaway, you throw me in jail, 1311 01:14:31,080 --> 01:14:34,120 but if I'm a famous murderer, you roll out the red carpet? 1312 01:14:34,120 --> 01:14:36,800 You'll be my guest of honour at the captain's table. 1313 01:14:36,800 --> 01:14:41,360 Hang on, hang on! He's not the only famous gangster on this ship! 1314 01:14:41,360 --> 01:14:43,520 What do you mean, Doctor? 1315 01:14:43,520 --> 01:14:47,000 I'm not really a minister, you know. I'm...yeah! 1316 01:14:47,000 --> 01:14:50,640 I'm Moonface Martin, boo-hoo! 1317 01:14:53,960 --> 01:14:56,360 Yeah. I'm a public enemy too. 1318 01:14:56,360 --> 01:14:58,880 Public enemy number two? Um, yeah. 1319 01:14:58,880 --> 01:15:00,760 Moon! Shut it, Erma. 1320 01:15:00,760 --> 01:15:02,640 Well, ladies and gentlemen, 1321 01:15:02,640 --> 01:15:07,960 it appears that we have not one but two famous criminals on board! 1322 01:15:07,960 --> 01:15:10,640 Let's make them feel at home! 1323 01:15:10,640 --> 01:15:13,040 EXCITED CHATTER 1324 01:15:13,040 --> 01:15:15,840 Oh, Mr Johnson, can I have your autograph? 1325 01:15:15,840 --> 01:15:17,760 Can I touch your trigger finger? 1326 01:15:17,760 --> 01:15:20,040 Did you ever kill anyone who looks like me? 1327 01:15:20,040 --> 01:15:23,200 Hey, baby, room for one more! Oh, what fun. Go on, darling. 1328 01:15:23,200 --> 01:15:26,520 Ladies and gentlemen, I give you 1329 01:15:26,520 --> 01:15:31,240 the honorary captain of the SS American. 1330 01:15:31,240 --> 01:15:35,960 Hip-hip... ALL: Hooray! 1331 01:15:38,040 --> 01:15:41,320 ♪ Times have changed 1332 01:15:41,320 --> 01:15:44,480 ♪ And we've often rewound the clock 1333 01:15:44,480 --> 01:15:48,280 ♪ Since the Puritans got a shock 1334 01:15:48,280 --> 01:15:51,520 ♪ When they landed on Plymouth Rock 1335 01:15:51,520 --> 01:15:55,520 ♪ If today 1336 01:15:55,520 --> 01:15:59,040 ♪ Any shock they should try to stem 1337 01:15:59,040 --> 01:16:02,240 ♪ Instead of landing on Plymouth Rock 1338 01:16:03,480 --> 01:16:10,560 ♪ Plymouth Rock would land on them 1339 01:16:10,560 --> 01:16:15,640 ♪ In olden days, a glimpse of stocking 1340 01:16:15,640 --> 01:16:17,880 ♪ Was looked on as something shocking 1341 01:16:17,880 --> 01:16:23,280 ♪ But now, God knows, anything goes 1342 01:16:23,280 --> 01:16:26,440 ♪ Good authors too who once knew better words 1343 01:16:26,440 --> 01:16:29,360 ♪ Now only use four-letter words 1344 01:16:29,360 --> 01:16:33,160 ♪ Writing prose, anything goes 1345 01:16:33,160 --> 01:16:36,600 ♪ The world has gone mad today and good's bad today 1346 01:16:36,600 --> 01:16:39,360 ♪ And black's white today and day's night today 1347 01:16:39,360 --> 01:16:42,080 ♪ And most guys today that women prize today 1348 01:16:42,080 --> 01:16:44,560 ♪ Are just silly gigolos 1349 01:16:44,560 --> 01:16:47,920 ♪ And though I'm not a great romancer 1350 01:16:47,920 --> 01:16:52,200 ♪ I know that you're bound to answer when I propose 1351 01:16:52,200 --> 01:16:55,440 ♪ Anything goes... ♪ 1352 01:17:06,440 --> 01:17:08,480 ♪ Ba-ba-bam! ♪ 1353 01:17:08,480 --> 01:17:10,560 Oh, come on! 1354 01:17:11,880 --> 01:17:14,040 Oh, come on! 1355 01:17:16,920 --> 01:17:23,040 Pow! Pow! 1356 01:17:45,280 --> 01:17:46,760 Mwah! 1357 01:17:46,760 --> 01:17:49,160 ♪ ..When Grandmama, whose age is eighty 1358 01:17:49,160 --> 01:17:53,000 ♪ In night clubs is getting matey with gigolos 1359 01:17:53,000 --> 01:17:55,520 ♪ Anything goes 1360 01:17:56,840 --> 01:17:59,840 ♪ When mothers pack and leave poor father 1361 01:17:59,840 --> 01:18:03,720 ♪ Because they decide they'd rather be tennis pros 1362 01:18:03,720 --> 01:18:05,920 ♪ Anything goes 1363 01:18:05,920 --> 01:18:09,880 ♪ If driving fast cars you like If low bars you like 1364 01:18:09,880 --> 01:18:12,800 ♪ If old hymns you like If bare limbs you like 1365 01:18:12,800 --> 01:18:15,640 ♪ If Mae West you like Or me undressed you like 1366 01:18:15,640 --> 01:18:18,440 ♪ Why, nobody will oppose 1367 01:18:18,440 --> 01:18:20,920 ♪ When every night the set that's smart 1368 01:18:20,920 --> 01:18:25,360 ♪ Is intruding in nudist parties in studios 1369 01:18:25,360 --> 01:18:29,920 ♪ Anything goes 1370 01:22:41,960 --> 01:22:44,920 ALL: # The world has gone mad today And good's bad today 1371 01:22:44,920 --> 01:22:47,560 ♪ And black's white today And day's night today 1372 01:22:47,560 --> 01:22:50,280 ♪ When most guys today that women prize today 1373 01:22:50,280 --> 01:22:53,000 ♪ Are just silly gigolos 1374 01:22:53,000 --> 01:22:55,920 ♪ They think he's gangster number one 1375 01:22:55,920 --> 01:22:58,720 ♪ So they've made him their favourite son 1376 01:22:58,720 --> 01:23:00,600 ♪ And that goes to show 1377 01:23:00,600 --> 01:23:02,480 ♪ Anything goes 1378 01:23:02,480 --> 01:23:05,560 ♪ If saying your prayers you like If green pears you like 1379 01:23:05,560 --> 01:23:08,080 ♪ If old chairs you like If back stairs you like 1380 01:23:08,080 --> 01:23:11,040 ♪ If love affairs you like With young bears you like 1381 01:23:11,040 --> 01:23:13,520 ♪ Why, nobody will oppose 1382 01:23:13,520 --> 01:23:16,160 ♪ And though I'm not a great romancer 1383 01:23:16,160 --> 01:23:20,680 ♪ I know that you're bound to answer when I propose 1384 01:23:20,680 --> 01:23:23,760 ♪ Anything goes 1385 01:23:23,760 --> 01:23:26,160 ♪ Anything, anything, anything 1386 01:23:26,160 --> 01:23:36,320 ♪ Anything goes... Goes... ♪ 1387 01:23:38,800 --> 01:23:41,360 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 1388 01:23:58,080 --> 01:24:00,840 INSTRUMENTAL: Anything Goes 1389 01:24:06,000 --> 01:24:09,360 LAUGHTER AND CHATTER 1390 01:24:09,360 --> 01:24:11,840 ♪ Tonight there's going to be some fun 1391 01:24:11,840 --> 01:24:13,960 ♪ Some fun-o, some fun-o 1392 01:24:13,960 --> 01:24:20,400 ♪ For Public Enemy Number One-o 1393 01:24:20,400 --> 01:24:23,400 ♪ Our gallant captain has told the staff 1394 01:24:23,400 --> 01:24:25,840 ♪ The staff-o, the staff-o 1395 01:24:25,840 --> 01:24:27,760 ♪ It's time for killing the fatted calf 1396 01:24:27,760 --> 01:24:29,160 ♪ And I'm throwing the party 1397 01:24:29,160 --> 01:24:32,120 ♪ On behalf of Public Enemy Number One 1398 01:24:32,120 --> 01:24:36,280 ♪ Public Enemy Number One-o 1399 01:24:38,720 --> 01:24:44,760 ♪ Public Enemy Number One 1400 01:24:44,760 --> 01:24:51,000 ♪ Thank thee for everything thou hast done 1401 01:24:51,000 --> 01:24:57,040 ♪ Blessings on thee, thou noble chap 1402 01:24:57,040 --> 01:25:03,960 ♪ For putting this boat of ours on the map 1403 01:25:03,960 --> 01:25:10,080 ♪ Thank thee heartily, holy man 1404 01:25:10,080 --> 01:25:16,280 ♪ For taking this liner American 1405 01:25:16,280 --> 01:25:23,600 ♪ For henceforth we'll be crowded on every run 1406 01:25:25,320 --> 01:25:35,720 ♪ Due to thee, Public Enemy Number One 1407 01:25:35,720 --> 01:25:44,280 ♪ Amen... ♪ 1408 01:25:45,480 --> 01:25:47,840 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 1409 01:25:49,680 --> 01:25:55,640 You know, you break your back to cheat and steal and kill, 1410 01:25:55,640 --> 01:25:58,040 and you wonder if it's all worth it. 1411 01:25:58,040 --> 01:26:00,560 Then something like this happens. 1412 01:26:00,560 --> 01:26:02,200 You're beautiful! 1413 01:26:02,200 --> 01:26:04,640 Let's go, girls, we've got a show to do. 1414 01:26:04,640 --> 01:26:08,240 So, how do you like the royal treatment, Snake Eyes? 1415 01:26:08,240 --> 01:26:09,840 Nice! 1416 01:26:09,840 --> 01:26:12,040 HE CHUCKLES 1417 01:26:12,040 --> 01:26:13,840 OTHERS CHUCKLE 1418 01:26:13,840 --> 01:26:17,040 Listen, kid, I just saw Hope. She's all broken up. Aw! 1419 01:26:17,040 --> 01:26:18,720 HE CHUCKLES 1420 01:26:18,720 --> 01:26:20,480 OTHERS CHUCKLE 1421 01:26:20,480 --> 01:26:23,560 Oh, tough guy, huh? Suppose I told you she wants to marry you. 1422 01:26:23,560 --> 01:26:25,440 You're kidding me. She said that? No. 1423 01:26:25,440 --> 01:26:27,240 SHE LAUGHS INSINCERELY 1424 01:26:27,240 --> 01:26:28,560 OTHERS LAUGH INSINCERELY 1425 01:26:28,560 --> 01:26:30,800 Come on, Billy, you know she's nuts about you. 1426 01:26:30,800 --> 01:26:33,840 She wants to marry you. She just hasn't got the guts to say so. 1427 01:26:33,840 --> 01:26:36,200 Ladies and gentlemen, 1428 01:26:36,200 --> 01:26:38,560 Miss Sweeney's service is about to begin. 1429 01:26:38,560 --> 01:26:41,280 Last call for drinks before the service. 1430 01:26:41,280 --> 01:26:42,680 Hey, showtime, toots! 1431 01:26:42,680 --> 01:26:46,520 I would appreciate if you would cease addressing me as "toots", 1432 01:26:46,520 --> 01:26:49,360 and henceforth call me by my right name - 1433 01:26:49,360 --> 01:26:52,080 Mrs Moonface Martin! 1434 01:26:52,080 --> 01:26:53,480 Yeah. 1435 01:26:53,480 --> 01:26:55,400 M-M-Mwah! 1436 01:26:55,400 --> 01:26:57,320 R-R-Rargh! R-R-Rargh! 1437 01:26:57,320 --> 01:27:00,440 R-R-R... Rargh! 1438 01:27:00,440 --> 01:27:01,640 Rargh. 1439 01:27:01,640 --> 01:27:04,600 Let me guess - you performed the ceremony yourself? 1440 01:27:04,600 --> 01:27:06,600 Oh, God, it's not legal, is it? 1441 01:27:08,360 --> 01:27:12,320 Miss Sweeney's service will do you good, Eli. 1442 01:27:12,320 --> 01:27:15,400 You need to reform your ways. 1443 01:27:15,400 --> 01:27:17,680 What's the matter with my ways? 1444 01:27:17,680 --> 01:27:20,400 You proposed to a sailor! 1445 01:27:20,400 --> 01:27:23,600 I'm a lonely man, Evangeline. 1446 01:27:23,600 --> 01:27:26,840 Hey, Dudley, get a load of this. 1447 01:27:26,840 --> 01:27:28,920 My dear, 1448 01:27:28,920 --> 01:27:32,400 may I say you look like a million bucks! 1449 01:27:32,400 --> 01:27:34,560 Thanks, fellas. I'm touched. 1450 01:27:34,560 --> 01:27:36,040 Wah! 1451 01:27:36,040 --> 01:27:37,880 That's an expression. 1452 01:27:37,880 --> 01:27:41,040 Evelyn, I really don't feel up to this. 1453 01:27:41,040 --> 01:27:42,600 I want to go back to my cabin. 1454 01:27:42,600 --> 01:27:44,120 Don't be silly, darling. 1455 01:27:44,120 --> 01:27:45,800 Look, it's Snake Ears! 1456 01:27:45,800 --> 01:27:47,360 Evelyn, no! I say! 1457 01:27:47,360 --> 01:27:49,120 Mr Johnson! Mr Johnson. 1458 01:27:49,120 --> 01:27:50,960 Who am I? 1459 01:27:50,960 --> 01:27:53,520 AS JAMES CAGNEY: You dirty rat! 1460 01:27:53,520 --> 01:27:55,960 You dirty rat. 1461 01:27:57,160 --> 01:27:58,720 Noel Coward. 1462 01:27:58,720 --> 01:28:00,960 Oh, damn. Evelyn, stop it. 1463 01:28:00,960 --> 01:28:03,040 Hey, you want to make her happy, pal? 1464 01:28:03,040 --> 01:28:04,720 Do an imitation of me. 1465 01:28:04,720 --> 01:28:06,520 You can be very cruel. 1466 01:28:06,520 --> 01:28:08,400 That's how he got to be Number One. 1467 01:28:08,400 --> 01:28:10,040 Hope, wait. Come on. 1468 01:28:10,040 --> 01:28:13,560 And now, ladies and gentlemen, 1469 01:28:13,560 --> 01:28:17,160 the SS American is pleased to present 1470 01:28:17,160 --> 01:28:20,080 the world's most sensuous sermoniser, 1471 01:28:20,080 --> 01:28:22,520 Her High—Stepping Holiness, 1472 01:28:22,520 --> 01:28:24,800 Miss Reno Sweeney! 1473 01:28:24,800 --> 01:28:27,000 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 1474 01:28:33,440 --> 01:28:35,240 Hush! 1475 01:28:35,240 --> 01:28:38,760 Brothers and sisters, we are here tonight to fight the Devil. 1476 01:28:39,840 --> 01:28:42,520 There's only one way to fight the Devil, 1477 01:28:42,520 --> 01:28:44,280 and that's in the open. 1478 01:28:44,280 --> 01:28:47,280 I want each of you to turn to his neighbour and say, 1479 01:28:47,280 --> 01:28:49,640 "Bless you, brother. Bless you, sister." 1480 01:28:49,640 --> 01:28:51,880 ALL: Bless you, brother. Bless you, sister. 1481 01:28:51,880 --> 01:28:54,280 There's only one way to send the Devil packing 1482 01:28:54,280 --> 01:28:55,920 and that's to confess your sins. 1483 01:28:55,920 --> 01:28:59,440 Who will be the first to speak out and say, "I'm a sinner"? 1484 01:28:59,440 --> 01:29:01,040 I'm a sinner! 1485 01:29:01,040 --> 01:29:03,960 ALL: Hallelujah! Thank you, sister. Who's next? 1486 01:29:03,960 --> 01:29:05,640 I'm a sinner. 1487 01:29:05,640 --> 01:29:07,760 ALL: Hallelujah! Who's next? 1488 01:29:07,760 --> 01:29:09,960 Go ahead, Eli. 1489 01:29:12,120 --> 01:29:14,920 Ahem. Well... 1490 01:29:14,920 --> 01:29:16,920 ..there was a time when I drank. 1491 01:29:16,920 --> 01:29:19,760 Yeah? What time was that? Half an hour ago? 1492 01:29:19,760 --> 01:29:21,400 ALL: Hallelujah! 1493 01:29:21,400 --> 01:29:23,600 I'm cursed with sex appeal! 1494 01:29:23,600 --> 01:29:25,520 It's been my downfall. 1495 01:29:25,520 --> 01:29:29,040 She's not confessing. She is advertising. 1496 01:29:29,040 --> 01:29:30,840 ALL: Hallelujah! 1497 01:29:30,840 --> 01:29:34,040 Come on, get busy. Who will give us a real confession? 1498 01:29:34,040 --> 01:29:35,720 Um... I say, 1499 01:29:35,720 --> 01:29:37,160 may I have a go? 1500 01:29:37,160 --> 01:29:40,400 Speak up, brother, I want to hear this. 1501 01:29:40,400 --> 01:29:41,960 Um... 1502 01:29:41,960 --> 01:29:45,000 While I was visiting Singapore some time ago, 1503 01:29:45,000 --> 01:29:47,120 there was a girl named Plum Blossom 1504 01:29:47,120 --> 01:29:49,000 of whom I became extremely fond. 1505 01:29:49,000 --> 01:29:51,480 Eventually, we made a bit of unpremeditated whoopee 1506 01:29:51,480 --> 01:29:53,080 in the willows... 1507 01:29:54,400 --> 01:29:56,200 ..and I enjoyed it very much. 1508 01:29:56,200 --> 01:29:58,400 HE EXHALES 1509 01:29:58,400 --> 01:30:00,520 LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE 1510 01:30:03,080 --> 01:30:06,840 I was worried about you, brother, but I feel much better now! 1511 01:30:06,840 --> 01:30:08,600 ALL: Hallelujah! 1512 01:30:08,600 --> 01:30:10,320 FANFARE PLAYS 1513 01:30:10,320 --> 01:30:11,960 Do you hear that playing? 1514 01:30:11,960 --> 01:30:13,760 ALL: Yes, I hear that playing. 1515 01:30:13,760 --> 01:30:16,080 Do you know who's playing? 1516 01:30:16,080 --> 01:30:18,040 ALL: No, who is that playing? 1517 01:30:18,040 --> 01:30:20,720 ♪ It's Gabriel, Gabriel playing 1518 01:30:20,720 --> 01:30:23,520 ♪ Gabriel, Gabriel saying 1519 01:30:25,080 --> 01:30:27,880 ♪ Will you be ready to go 1520 01:30:27,880 --> 01:30:31,800 ♪ When I blow my horn? 1521 01:30:31,800 --> 01:30:35,720 ♪ Blow, Gabriel, blow 1522 01:30:35,720 --> 01:30:40,640 ♪ Go on and blow, Gabriel, blow 1523 01:30:40,640 --> 01:30:43,400 ♪ I've been a sinner I've been a scamp 1524 01:30:43,400 --> 01:30:45,760 ♪ But now I'm willing to trim my lamp 1525 01:30:45,760 --> 01:30:48,800 ♪ So blow, Gabriel, blow 1526 01:30:48,800 --> 01:30:53,120 ♪ I was low, Gabriel, low 1527 01:30:53,120 --> 01:30:58,120 ♪ Mighty low, Gabriel, low 1528 01:30:58,120 --> 01:31:00,800 ♪ But now, since I have seen the light 1529 01:31:00,800 --> 01:31:03,040 ♪ I'm good by day and I'm good by night 1530 01:31:03,040 --> 01:31:06,240 ♪ So blow, Gabriel, blow 1531 01:31:06,240 --> 01:31:10,880 ♪ Once I was cited for hell 1532 01:31:10,880 --> 01:31:15,720 ♪ Once I was headed for hell 1533 01:31:15,720 --> 01:31:17,800 ♪ But when I got to Satan's door 1534 01:31:17,800 --> 01:31:20,400 ♪ I heard you blowing on your horn once more 1535 01:31:20,400 --> 01:31:22,840 ♪ So I said, Satan, farewell 1536 01:31:22,840 --> 01:31:28,280 ♪ And now I'm all ready to fly 1537 01:31:28,280 --> 01:31:32,240 ♪ Yes, to fly higher and higher and higher 1538 01:31:32,240 --> 01:31:36,920 ♪ Cos I've gone through brimstone and I've been through the fire 1539 01:31:36,920 --> 01:31:39,760 ♪ And I've purged my soul and my heart too 1540 01:31:39,760 --> 01:31:41,680 ♪ So climb up to the mountain top 1541 01:31:41,680 --> 01:31:45,240 ♪ So start to blow, Gabriel, blow 1542 01:31:45,240 --> 01:31:50,200 ♪ Go on and blow, Gabriel, blow 1543 01:31:50,200 --> 01:31:52,680 ♪ I want to join your happy band 1544 01:31:52,680 --> 01:31:55,320 ♪ And play all day in the promised land 1545 01:31:55,320 --> 01:32:01,920 ♪ So blow, Gabriel, blow... ♪ 1546 01:32:11,760 --> 01:32:14,560 OTHERS GASP 1547 01:34:39,560 --> 01:34:41,160 Come on, you scamps! 1548 01:34:41,160 --> 01:34:42,560 Get up, you sinners! 1549 01:34:42,560 --> 01:34:44,840 You're all too full of expensive dinners! 1550 01:34:44,840 --> 01:34:47,440 Stand up on your lazy feet and sing! 1551 01:34:47,440 --> 01:34:56,320 ♪ Go on and blow, Gabriel, blow 1552 01:34:56,320 --> 01:34:59,120 ♪ I've been a sinner I've been a scamp 1553 01:34:59,120 --> 01:35:01,440 ♪ But now I'm willing to trim my lamp 1554 01:35:01,440 --> 01:35:04,880 ♪ So blow, Gabriel, blow 1555 01:35:04,880 --> 01:35:08,840 ♪ I was low, Gabriel, low 1556 01:35:08,840 --> 01:35:13,560 ♪ Mighty low, Gabriel, low 1557 01:35:13,560 --> 01:35:16,360 ♪ But now, since I have seen the light 1558 01:35:16,360 --> 01:35:18,560 ♪ I'm good by day and I'm good by night 1559 01:35:18,560 --> 01:35:21,080 ♪ So blow, Gabriel, blow 1560 01:36:41,640 --> 01:36:46,320 ♪ Once I was headed foe hell 1561 01:36:46,320 --> 01:36:51,120 ♪ Once I was headed for hell 1562 01:36:51,120 --> 01:36:53,240 ♪ But when I got to Satan's door 1563 01:36:53,240 --> 01:36:55,600 ♪ I heard you blowing on your horn once more 1564 01:36:55,600 --> 01:36:57,320 ♪ So I said 1565 01:36:57,320 --> 01:36:59,640 ♪ Satan, farewell 1566 01:36:59,640 --> 01:37:03,480 ♪ And now I'm all ready to fly 1567 01:37:03,480 --> 01:37:08,680 ♪ Yes, to fly higher and higher and higher 1568 01:37:08,680 --> 01:37:12,880 ♪ Cos I've gone through brimstone and I've been through the fire 1569 01:37:12,880 --> 01:37:15,320 ♪ And I've purged my soul and my heart too 1570 01:37:15,320 --> 01:37:17,280 ♪ So climb up to the mountain top 1571 01:37:17,280 --> 01:37:21,000 ♪ So go on and blow, Gabriel, blow 1572 01:37:21,000 --> 01:37:25,720 ♪ Gabriel, blow, blow Blow that horn 1573 01:37:25,720 --> 01:37:26,760 ♪ Blow that horn 1574 01:37:26,760 --> 01:37:28,240 ♪ Gabriel, blow 1575 01:37:28,240 --> 01:37:29,480 ♪ Blow that horn 1576 01:37:29,480 --> 01:37:30,880 ♪ Gabriel, blow 1577 01:37:30,880 --> 01:37:32,200 ♪ Blow that horn 1578 01:37:32,200 --> 01:37:34,520 ♪ Gabriel, blow that horn 1579 01:37:34,520 --> 01:37:38,040 ♪ Blow that horn, blow that horn 1580 01:37:38,040 --> 01:37:42,320 ♪ Gabriel, Gabriel, Gabriel Gabriel, blow that horn 1581 01:37:42,320 --> 01:37:45,040 ♪ But now, since I have seen the light 1582 01:37:45,040 --> 01:37:47,280 ♪ I'm good by day and I'm good by night 1583 01:37:47,280 --> 01:37:49,000 ♪ So blow, blow that horn 1584 01:37:49,000 --> 01:37:50,600 ♪ Blow 1585 01:37:53,080 --> 01:37:55,320 ♪ Come on and blow that horn 1586 01:37:55,320 --> 01:37:57,400 ♪ Blow, blow, blow 1587 01:37:57,400 --> 01:37:59,160 ♪ Blow that horn 1588 01:37:59,160 --> 01:38:01,840 ♪ Gabriel, blow, blow Blow that horn 1589 01:38:01,840 --> 01:38:03,400 ♪ I want to join your happy band 1590 01:38:03,400 --> 01:38:05,720 ♪ And play all day in the promised land 1591 01:38:05,720 --> 01:38:14,840 ♪ So blow, Gabriel, blow... 1592 01:38:14,840 --> 01:38:21,520 ♪ Oh-oh-oh... ♪ 1593 01:38:21,520 --> 01:38:23,560 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 1594 01:38:34,200 --> 01:38:37,040 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE CONTINUES 1595 01:38:43,760 --> 01:38:46,360 Hallelujah! They've seen the light. 1596 01:38:46,360 --> 01:38:48,760 INSTRUMENTAL CONTINUES 1597 01:38:52,200 --> 01:38:53,880 Wait a minute! 1598 01:38:53,880 --> 01:38:55,440 What about Snake Eyes? 1599 01:38:55,440 --> 01:38:57,920 We haven't heard his confession. Yeah! 1600 01:38:57,920 --> 01:39:01,360 OTHERS: 1601 01:39:01,360 --> 01:39:03,240 We want Snake Eyes! 1602 01:39:03,240 --> 01:39:05,640 All right, all right. You want a confession? 1603 01:39:05,640 --> 01:39:07,680 I'll give you a confession. Right! 1604 01:39:07,680 --> 01:39:10,520 Three weeks ago, I met a girl and I... 1605 01:39:10,520 --> 01:39:12,640 Well, I fell in love with her. 1606 01:39:12,640 --> 01:39:14,560 How did I show it? 1607 01:39:14,560 --> 01:39:16,480 I hounded her. 1608 01:39:16,480 --> 01:39:18,560 I embarrassed her. 1609 01:39:19,640 --> 01:39:21,320 I made her cry. 1610 01:39:22,600 --> 01:39:24,640 I'm sorry... Hope. 1611 01:39:25,760 --> 01:39:28,040 I just want you to be happy. 1612 01:39:28,040 --> 01:39:29,720 I'll never bother you again. 1613 01:39:29,720 --> 01:39:33,320 What's going on? He doesn't sound like Snake Eyes Johnson. I'm not. 1614 01:39:33,320 --> 01:39:37,040 I'm not a gangster. I'm just a broken-down broker. 1615 01:39:37,040 --> 01:39:40,040 Then he's a phoney! I want my money back. 1616 01:39:40,040 --> 01:39:41,920 They ought to give him the chair. 1617 01:39:41,920 --> 01:39:44,200 Purser, clap that man in irons! ALL: Yeah! 1618 01:39:44,200 --> 01:39:46,600 Get behind me, kid. We'll shoot our way out. 1619 01:39:46,600 --> 01:39:49,160 OTHERS SCREAM 1620 01:39:49,160 --> 01:39:50,960 AUDIENCE LAUGHS 1621 01:39:54,480 --> 01:39:57,480 There's something definitely wrong here. 1622 01:39:57,480 --> 01:39:59,600 EXCITED CHATTER 1623 01:40:01,000 --> 01:40:02,480 Captain? 1624 01:40:02,480 --> 01:40:04,000 Yes, madam? 1625 01:40:04,000 --> 01:40:06,720 Captain, is it true that you have the authority 1626 01:40:06,720 --> 01:40:10,080 to perform weddings on board this vessel? 1627 01:40:10,080 --> 01:40:14,880 It is, madam. Then I would like you to schedule one for 10am tomorrow. 1628 01:40:14,880 --> 01:40:18,440 These young people are eager to get married, 1629 01:40:18,440 --> 01:40:21,120 and they would like to do so 1630 01:40:21,120 --> 01:40:24,160 before anything else can go wrong. 1631 01:40:24,160 --> 01:40:25,680 Mother... 1632 01:40:25,680 --> 01:40:28,040 Better make that 9.30. 1633 01:40:28,040 --> 01:40:29,840 As you wish, madam. 1634 01:40:44,840 --> 01:40:47,960 ♪ I first knew love's delight 1635 01:40:47,960 --> 01:40:52,480 ♪ When, presto, out of the blue 1636 01:40:52,480 --> 01:40:55,760 ♪ A dream appeared one night 1637 01:40:55,760 --> 01:41:00,920 ♪ And whispered, how do you do? 1638 01:41:00,920 --> 01:41:04,280 ♪ I knew I was tempting fate 1639 01:41:04,280 --> 01:41:10,600 ♪ But I took it straight to my heart 1640 01:41:10,600 --> 01:41:14,400 ♪ My fears were right 1641 01:41:14,400 --> 01:41:21,880 ♪ And now we must part 1642 01:41:21,880 --> 01:41:31,440 ♪ Goodbye, little dream, goodbye 1643 01:41:31,440 --> 01:41:35,400 ♪ You made my romance sublime 1644 01:41:35,400 --> 01:41:40,720 ♪ Now it's time to fly 1645 01:41:40,720 --> 01:41:45,720 ♪ For the stars have fled from the heavens 1646 01:41:45,720 --> 01:41:49,840 ♪ The moon's deserted the hill 1647 01:41:49,840 --> 01:41:56,160 ♪ And the sultry breeze that sang in the trees 1648 01:41:56,160 --> 01:42:02,520 ♪ Is suddenly strangely still 1649 01:42:02,520 --> 01:42:10,680 ♪ It's done, little dream, it's done 1650 01:42:10,680 --> 01:42:14,800 ♪ So bid me a fond farewell 1651 01:42:14,800 --> 01:42:19,320 ♪ We both had our fun 1652 01:42:20,680 --> 01:42:25,000 ♪ Was it Romeo or Juliet 1653 01:42:25,000 --> 01:42:33,320 ♪ Who said, when about to die 1654 01:42:33,320 --> 01:42:40,520 ♪ Love is not all peaches and cream? 1655 01:42:40,520 --> 01:42:50,200 ♪ Little dream, goodbye... ♪ 1656 01:42:54,760 --> 01:42:57,600 APPLAUSE 1657 01:42:57,600 --> 01:43:00,200 INSTRUMENTAL CONTINUES 1658 01:43:12,160 --> 01:43:16,280 OK, kid. Come on, take a card. Take a card, any card. 1659 01:43:19,200 --> 01:43:22,360 OK. Don't worry. I'll take one for you. 1660 01:43:22,360 --> 01:43:24,080 Now look at it. 1661 01:43:24,080 --> 01:43:27,200 OK. Don't worry. I'll look at it for you. 1662 01:43:29,120 --> 01:43:31,640 Now, don't tell me what it is. 1663 01:43:32,960 --> 01:43:36,440 I don't want to play cards. What do you want to do, shoot craps? 1664 01:43:36,440 --> 01:43:39,760 Yeah. I was thinking of shooting myself. Hey, come on, kid. 1665 01:43:39,760 --> 01:43:41,960 Aw, give me one good reason to live. 1666 01:43:41,960 --> 01:43:43,680 Oh... Cherry cheesecake. 1667 01:43:43,680 --> 01:43:48,080 A week ago, I was getting fitted for my first Brooks Brothers suit. 1668 01:43:48,080 --> 01:43:51,040 Now look where I am. Come on, this place ain't so bad. 1669 01:43:51,040 --> 01:43:53,080 Hey, were you ever in jail in Cicero? 1670 01:43:53,080 --> 01:43:55,280 I'm not talking about the new jail. 1671 01:43:55,280 --> 01:43:57,080 I'm talking about the old one. 1672 01:43:57,080 --> 01:44:00,080 Moon, please! My girl's getting married in the morning. 1673 01:44:00,080 --> 01:44:02,840 I'm never going to see her again. You know your problem, kid? 1674 01:44:02,840 --> 01:44:05,960 You got no philosophy. You know, life has taught me 1675 01:44:05,960 --> 01:44:07,440 to think more positive. 1676 01:44:07,440 --> 01:44:09,920 Like Dillinger once told me, 1677 01:44:09,920 --> 01:44:13,160 it's always the darkest before they turn on the lights. 1678 01:44:19,000 --> 01:44:22,440 You know, there's an old Australian bush song 1679 01:44:22,440 --> 01:44:25,240 that Melba used to sing. 1680 01:44:25,240 --> 01:44:29,200 A song that always cheered me when I was blue. 1681 01:44:30,840 --> 01:44:33,200 Even Melba said this bush song 1682 01:44:33,200 --> 01:44:36,040 was a helluva song to sing. 1683 01:44:36,040 --> 01:44:42,160 So be quiet whilst I render it for you... 1684 01:44:45,960 --> 01:44:50,560 ♪ When your instinct tells you that disaster 1685 01:44:50,560 --> 01:44:54,400 ♪ Is approaching you faster and faster 1686 01:44:54,400 --> 01:45:00,920 ♪ Then be like the bluebird and sing 1687 01:45:00,920 --> 01:45:03,640 ♪ Tweet tweet 1688 01:45:03,640 --> 01:45:07,720 ♪ Tra-la, la-la, la-la 1689 01:45:07,720 --> 01:45:12,320 ♪ When you know you're headed for the jailer 1690 01:45:12,320 --> 01:45:16,120 ♪ Don't allow tour old face to look paler 1691 01:45:16,120 --> 01:45:21,920 ♪ But be like the bluebird and sing 1692 01:45:21,920 --> 01:45:24,160 ♪ Tweet-tweet 1693 01:45:24,160 --> 01:45:28,120 ♪ Tra-la-la-la-la-la 1694 01:45:30,320 --> 01:45:36,480 ♪ Be like the bluebird who never is blue 1695 01:45:36,480 --> 01:45:45,200 ♪ For he knows from his upbringing what singing can do... ♪ 1696 01:45:45,200 --> 01:45:48,080 HE WHISTLES CHEERILY 1697 01:45:48,080 --> 01:45:50,160 BIRDS TWEET 1698 01:45:57,160 --> 01:45:58,600 ♪ Tra-la-la 1699 01:45:58,600 --> 01:46:00,760 ♪ La-la-la-la-la-la 1700 01:46:00,760 --> 01:46:06,240 ♪ Tra-la-la-la 1701 01:46:06,240 --> 01:46:08,520 ♪ Tra-la, tra-la 1702 01:46:08,520 --> 01:46:10,440 ♪ Tra-la-la 1703 01:46:10,440 --> 01:46:12,040 ♪ Tra-la 1704 01:46:36,080 --> 01:46:41,960 ♪ Be like the bluebird who never is blue 1705 01:46:41,960 --> 01:46:51,960 ♪ For he knows from his upbringing what singing can do 1706 01:46:53,320 --> 01:46:55,200 ♪ Ooh-ooh-ooh 1707 01:47:02,320 --> 01:47:06,680 ♪ And though by other birdies in the boughs 1708 01:47:06,680 --> 01:47:14,040 ♪ He may be told that his efforts are perfectly lousy 1709 01:47:17,520 --> 01:47:20,920 ♪ He sings on and on 1710 01:47:22,760 --> 01:47:25,920 ♪ Till his troubles are through 1711 01:47:28,640 --> 01:47:30,520 ♪ Tweet-tweet 1712 01:47:32,840 --> 01:47:34,480 ♪ Tweet... ♪ 1713 01:47:37,760 --> 01:47:40,800 BIRDS TWEET 1714 01:47:40,800 --> 01:47:47,680 ♪ Tra-la-la-la-la-la... ♪ 1715 01:47:47,680 --> 01:47:49,960 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 1716 01:47:57,560 --> 01:47:59,440 My, what a dump! 1717 01:47:59,440 --> 01:48:03,560 Irma! I've gotta talk fast. I've got a couple of sailors waiting for me. 1718 01:48:03,560 --> 01:48:07,120 They're gonna show me how to grease the hawsers. 1719 01:48:07,120 --> 01:48:09,160 What's going on up there? 1720 01:48:09,160 --> 01:48:11,480 Have you seen Hope? Yes. And let me tell you, kiddo, 1721 01:48:11,480 --> 01:48:13,240 you're well rid of that drip. 1722 01:48:13,240 --> 01:48:16,200 All she does is whine and cry 1723 01:48:16,200 --> 01:48:19,400 and stand around looking like Garbo in Camille. 1724 01:48:19,400 --> 01:48:21,720 Did she say anything about me? No. 1725 01:48:21,720 --> 01:48:23,760 But she did send you this note. 1726 01:48:23,760 --> 01:48:26,240 Hey, Moonie! 1727 01:48:26,240 --> 01:48:28,520 How about giving me your passports? 1728 01:48:28,520 --> 01:48:30,800 You ain't going to need them where you're going, 1729 01:48:30,800 --> 01:48:33,240 and I can sell them for a bundle. Yes, that's a good idea. 1730 01:48:33,240 --> 01:48:35,880 Come here, I want a little conversation with you. 1731 01:48:35,880 --> 01:48:37,480 By the way, Moon, 1732 01:48:37,480 --> 01:48:40,440 the new list of public enemies just came out. 1733 01:48:40,440 --> 01:48:43,760 You've been passed...by tooth decay! 1734 01:48:43,760 --> 01:48:46,040 SHE CHUCKLES 1735 01:48:51,160 --> 01:48:53,360 APPLAUSE 1736 01:48:55,480 --> 01:48:57,360 "Dearest darling. 1737 01:48:57,360 --> 01:49:00,120 "I love you so, but what good does love do 1738 01:49:00,120 --> 01:49:01,920 "when there is no hope? 1739 01:49:01,920 --> 01:49:03,840 "Love, Hope." 1740 01:49:03,840 --> 01:49:05,680 AUDIENCE LAUGHS 1741 01:49:14,520 --> 01:49:17,560 ♪ All through the night 1742 01:49:17,560 --> 01:49:23,000 ♪ I delight in your love 1743 01:49:23,000 --> 01:49:27,080 ♪ All through the night 1744 01:49:27,080 --> 01:49:30,200 ♪ You're so close to me 1745 01:49:32,000 --> 01:49:36,000 ♪ All through the night 1746 01:49:36,000 --> 01:49:40,560 ♪ From a height far above 1747 01:49:40,560 --> 01:49:48,200 ♪ You and your love bring me ecstasy 1748 01:49:50,200 --> 01:49:54,840 ♪ When dawn comes to waken me 1749 01:49:54,840 --> 01:49:59,160 ♪ You're never there at all 1750 01:49:59,160 --> 01:50:03,920 ♪ I know you've forsaken me 1751 01:50:03,920 --> 01:50:07,640 ♪ Till the shadows fall 1752 01:50:07,640 --> 01:50:11,640 ♪ But then once again 1753 01:50:11,640 --> 01:50:13,880 ♪ I can dream 1754 01:50:13,880 --> 01:50:19,240 ♪ I've the right 1755 01:50:19,240 --> 01:50:24,520 ♪ To be close to you 1756 01:50:24,520 --> 01:50:36,840 ♪ All through the night 1757 01:50:36,840 --> 01:50:41,800 ♪ I delight in your love 1758 01:50:41,800 --> 01:50:45,480 ♪ All through the night 1759 01:50:45,480 --> 01:50:50,480 ♪ You're so close to me 1760 01:50:50,480 --> 01:50:54,640 ♪ All through the night 1761 01:50:54,640 --> 01:50:59,600 ♪ From a height far above 1762 01:50:59,600 --> 01:51:08,800 ♪ You and your love bring me ecstasy 1763 01:51:08,800 --> 01:51:13,160 ♪ When dawn's overtaken us 1764 01:51:13,160 --> 01:51:17,440 ♪ We'll sadly say goodbye 1765 01:51:17,440 --> 01:51:22,360 ♪ Till dreams re-awaken us 1766 01:51:22,360 --> 01:51:25,840 ♪ And the moon is high 1767 01:51:25,840 --> 01:51:29,920 ♪ And then once again 1768 01:51:29,920 --> 01:51:37,320 ♪ Will I know I was right 1769 01:51:38,720 --> 01:51:43,840 ♪ Staying close to you 1770 01:51:43,840 --> 01:51:52,480 ♪ All through the night 1771 01:51:54,240 --> 01:51:59,840 ♪ Staying close to you 1772 01:51:59,840 --> 01:52:14,160 ♪ All through the night... ♪ 1773 01:52:14,160 --> 01:52:16,480 APPLAUSE 1774 01:52:23,760 --> 01:52:27,880 Moonlight, by Lord Evelyn Oakleigh. 1775 01:52:29,440 --> 01:52:31,920 A lonely figure walks the deck 1776 01:52:31,920 --> 01:52:35,280 The moonlight glancing off his beano 1777 01:52:35,280 --> 01:52:37,240 'Tis not the ship 1778 01:52:37,240 --> 01:52:38,920 'Tis he the wreck 1779 01:52:38,920 --> 01:52:41,480 His heart dashed on a girl named... 1780 01:52:41,480 --> 01:52:43,120 Miss Sweeney! 1781 01:52:43,120 --> 01:52:45,120 I say, you startled me. 1782 01:52:45,120 --> 01:52:46,600 Sorry. I couldn't sleep. 1783 01:52:46,600 --> 01:52:48,040 Nor I. 1784 01:52:48,040 --> 01:52:50,120 The Lord works in mysterious ways, Evie, 1785 01:52:50,120 --> 01:52:52,600 but this time, he's got even me stymied. 1786 01:52:52,600 --> 01:52:55,080 My two best friends are in the slam 1787 01:52:55,080 --> 01:52:56,920 and tomorrow morning... 1788 01:52:56,920 --> 01:52:59,160 Well, you know all about that. 1789 01:53:00,600 --> 01:53:02,520 Here's to the happy groom. 1790 01:53:02,520 --> 01:53:04,040 Oh... 1791 01:53:04,040 --> 01:53:05,960 Make that, here's to the groom. 1792 01:53:05,960 --> 01:53:08,040 AUDIENCE LAUGHS 1793 01:53:08,040 --> 01:53:12,080 Miss Sweeney, you see before you a man staggered by a revelation. 1794 01:53:12,080 --> 01:53:15,480 It hit me like a stone hammer in the middle of your service. 1795 01:53:16,680 --> 01:53:19,160 The woman I am destined to marry tomorrow 1796 01:53:19,160 --> 01:53:21,000 is not one and the same 1797 01:53:21,000 --> 01:53:22,800 with the woman I love. 1798 01:53:22,800 --> 01:53:25,280 You mean you're not in love with Hope? 1799 01:53:25,280 --> 01:53:26,560 That's great! 1800 01:53:26,560 --> 01:53:28,880 I mean, gee, it's a good thing you found out. 1801 01:53:28,880 --> 01:53:30,760 I mean, just in time, and everything. 1802 01:53:30,760 --> 01:53:33,000 Ah, there's the rub. 1803 01:53:34,800 --> 01:53:37,480 You know the Oakleigh family moto? 1804 01:53:39,440 --> 01:53:43,720 Nostrum fuglium sentorum. What does that mean? 1805 01:53:43,720 --> 01:53:45,520 No-one really knows. 1806 01:53:45,520 --> 01:53:47,440 AUDIENCE LAUGHS 1807 01:53:48,680 --> 01:53:53,120 But we're not supposed to go around backing out of engagements. 1808 01:53:54,960 --> 01:53:56,320 Ah, well... 1809 01:53:58,960 --> 01:54:01,040 Adieu, Miss Sweeney. 1810 01:54:05,600 --> 01:54:08,360 You know, there's just one thing I can't figure. 1811 01:54:08,360 --> 01:54:11,520 That whoopee in the willows business 1812 01:54:11,520 --> 01:54:13,520 with Plum Blossom. 1813 01:54:13,520 --> 01:54:17,320 How does that fit in with nostrum fuglium whatever? 1814 01:54:17,320 --> 01:54:20,120 Goodness, this is most embarrassing. 1815 01:54:20,120 --> 01:54:22,000 Must I explain? 1816 01:54:22,000 --> 01:54:23,600 It's your motto. 1817 01:54:25,240 --> 01:54:28,200 Miss Sweeney, I've never told this to anyone before. 1818 01:54:29,520 --> 01:54:31,920 It's the Oakleigh family secret. 1819 01:54:31,920 --> 01:54:36,120 There's something wild and passionate in our souls. 1820 01:54:36,120 --> 01:54:38,280 In mine especially. 1821 01:54:39,760 --> 01:54:42,080 ♪ Long, long ago 1822 01:54:42,080 --> 01:54:45,760 ♪ So long ago I hardly know when 1823 01:54:45,760 --> 01:54:50,480 ♪ My great-great-grandmother now and then 1824 01:54:50,480 --> 01:54:53,240 ♪ Stepped out with a gypsy 1825 01:54:54,480 --> 01:54:57,960 ♪ Of course you may say she was 1826 01:54:57,960 --> 01:55:02,040 ♪ A little bit tipsy 1827 01:55:03,360 --> 01:55:06,160 ♪ But tipsy, no, no 1828 01:55:06,160 --> 01:55:09,800 ♪ Of their love there wasn't a doubt 1829 01:55:09,800 --> 01:55:16,000 ♪ So I can't wait to get the stage all set 1830 01:55:16,000 --> 01:55:22,960 ♪ So I can let the gypsy in me out 1831 01:55:26,720 --> 01:55:30,080 ♪ Hiding away 1832 01:55:30,080 --> 01:55:33,600 ♪ There's a little bit of gypsy in me 1833 01:55:35,080 --> 01:55:37,920 ♪ That's never been found 1834 01:55:39,120 --> 01:55:42,320 ♪ Waiting its day 1835 01:55:42,320 --> 01:55:45,560 ♪ There's a little bit of gypsy in me 1836 01:55:46,720 --> 01:55:49,440 ♪ Just hanging around 1837 01:55:51,000 --> 01:55:54,400 ♪ Till that magical night 1838 01:55:54,400 --> 01:55:57,200 ♪ When the stars by their light 1839 01:55:57,200 --> 01:55:59,480 ♪ Bring mystery 1840 01:55:59,480 --> 01:56:02,200 ♪ To the sleeping lagoon 1841 01:56:03,320 --> 01:56:06,760 ♪ While the haunting guitar 1842 01:56:06,760 --> 01:56:09,520 ♪ Not too near, not too far 1843 01:56:09,520 --> 01:56:12,320 ♪ Gaily strums away, hums away 1844 01:56:12,320 --> 01:56:15,120 ♪ A titillating tune 1845 01:56:15,120 --> 01:56:19,560 ♪ When I'm there in that dream 1846 01:56:19,560 --> 01:56:22,760 ♪ With the one in the world 1847 01:56:22,760 --> 01:56:26,080 ♪ I worship passionately 1848 01:56:27,640 --> 01:56:31,800 ♪ At the moment supreme 1849 01:56:31,800 --> 01:56:34,920 ♪ Will be shown the unknown 1850 01:56:34,920 --> 01:56:37,800 ♪ Gypsy in me 1851 01:58:46,560 --> 01:58:49,520 ♪ Ah-ah-ah-ah... ♪ 1852 01:58:49,520 --> 01:58:52,560 SHE HOLDS A NOTE 1853 01:58:56,360 --> 01:58:58,920 ♪ Ah-ah... 1854 01:59:00,600 --> 01:59:04,280 BOTH: # Ah-ah-ah-ah 1855 01:59:04,280 --> 01:59:08,240 ♪ Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah 1856 01:59:08,240 --> 01:59:11,120 ♪ Ah-ah-ah 1857 01:59:11,120 --> 01:59:18,640 ♪ Ah-ah, ah-ah-ah 1858 01:59:18,640 --> 01:59:20,400 ♪ Ah! ♪ 1859 01:59:44,400 --> 01:59:46,040 Ah! 1860 01:59:47,480 --> 01:59:50,040 AUDIENCE LAUGHS 1861 02:00:12,320 --> 02:00:14,560 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 1862 02:00:25,920 --> 02:00:28,520 EXCITED CHATTER 1863 02:00:28,520 --> 02:00:32,800 All right, you two, get in there and behave yourselves. Hey, hey! 1864 02:00:32,800 --> 02:00:34,360 What's going on here? 1865 02:00:34,360 --> 02:00:36,000 You'll only be in for an hour. 1866 02:00:36,000 --> 02:00:38,800 They cleaned out third class playing craps. 1867 02:00:38,800 --> 02:00:40,960 Some folks are pretty hot about it. 1868 02:00:40,960 --> 02:00:43,680 What about us? When are we getting out? I know this would happen! 1869 02:00:43,680 --> 02:00:47,800 I hope you're satisfied! Hey, hey, hey! You know you're problem, kid? 1870 02:00:47,800 --> 02:00:50,000 You got no philosophy. 1871 02:00:50,000 --> 02:00:53,840 There's an old Australian bush song... Would you forget about that? 1872 02:00:53,840 --> 02:00:55,680 What time is it? 1873 02:00:55,680 --> 02:00:57,480 Half past. Half past what? 1874 02:00:57,480 --> 02:00:59,880 I don't know. I lost the little hand. 1875 02:00:59,880 --> 02:01:02,760 The wedding starts at 9.30. We gotta get out of here. 1876 02:01:02,760 --> 02:01:05,400 Hey, you bums! Reno! Boys, I've got fabulous news, 1877 02:01:05,400 --> 02:01:08,640 the greatest thing that can happen to a person just happened to me! 1878 02:01:08,640 --> 02:01:11,400 You got parole? No, she's in love! 1879 02:01:11,400 --> 02:01:14,960 And what's more, Evelyn is in love with me. 1880 02:01:14,960 --> 02:01:16,440 What? That's great. 1881 02:01:16,440 --> 02:01:19,880 In fact, it's perfect. Yeah. That's right, cos Reno gets to marry 1882 02:01:19,880 --> 02:01:22,200 Evelyn, and Billy gets to marry Hope! 1883 02:01:22,200 --> 02:01:24,600 That only leaves one little problem. BOTH: What's that? 1884 02:01:24,600 --> 02:01:26,360 How do I put this? Let me out! 1885 02:01:26,360 --> 02:01:28,800 Reno, we've got to think of something. 1886 02:01:28,800 --> 02:01:32,400 Yeah, if only we were them. Them? Yeah, they get out in an hour. 1887 02:01:35,400 --> 02:01:37,000 Hey, guys! 1888 02:01:37,000 --> 02:01:39,800 That's a couple of fancy outfits you're wearing there. 1889 02:01:39,800 --> 02:01:41,480 Thanks, old buddy. 1890 02:01:41,480 --> 02:01:44,360 I have to say, I like the look of your duds too. 1891 02:01:44,360 --> 02:01:46,680 Yeah? You wouldn't fancy a little swap? 1892 02:01:46,680 --> 02:01:50,040 Clothes make the man! 1893 02:01:50,040 --> 02:01:52,520 LIVELY MUSIC PLAYS 1894 02:01:52,520 --> 02:01:54,760 EXCITED CHATTER 1895 02:02:04,840 --> 02:02:06,840 Now, what? Guys... 1896 02:02:06,840 --> 02:02:08,520 Oh, come on! 1897 02:02:10,720 --> 02:02:13,080 APPLAUSE 1898 02:02:19,400 --> 02:02:20,760 Oh... 1899 02:02:20,760 --> 02:02:22,760 HE GASPS 1900 02:02:26,480 --> 02:02:30,560 Erma, you're beautiful. And talented. 1901 02:02:30,560 --> 02:02:32,560 Make an honest man of me, Erma. 1902 02:02:32,560 --> 02:02:34,920 Marry me. No, marry me! 1903 02:02:34,920 --> 02:02:37,440 THEY ARGUE 1904 02:02:37,440 --> 02:02:38,880 Hey, fellas. 1905 02:02:38,880 --> 02:02:40,960 Getting married's for the birds. 1906 02:02:40,960 --> 02:02:42,440 Who needs it? 1907 02:02:42,440 --> 02:02:44,080 OTHERS: We do! 1908 02:02:44,080 --> 02:02:45,680 Yeah? 1909 02:02:49,920 --> 02:02:55,040 ♪ Buddie, beware 1910 02:02:55,040 --> 02:03:00,040 ♪ Buddie better take care 1911 02:03:00,040 --> 02:03:02,600 ♪ Though at heart, I'm a pearl 1912 02:03:02,600 --> 02:03:04,880 ♪ I'm a difficult girl 1913 02:03:04,880 --> 02:03:08,320 ♪ So, Buddie, beware 1914 02:03:08,320 --> 02:03:13,760 ♪ When I go to a show 1915 02:03:13,760 --> 02:03:18,480 ♪ I prefer the first row 1916 02:03:18,480 --> 02:03:21,240 ♪ When invited to dine 1917 02:03:21,240 --> 02:03:24,080 ♪ I can't eat without wine 1918 02:03:24,080 --> 02:03:28,040 ♪ So, Buddie, beware 1919 02:03:28,040 --> 02:03:32,920 ♪ During Christmas holidays 1920 02:03:32,920 --> 02:03:37,280 ♪ I develop taking ways 1921 02:03:37,280 --> 02:03:41,040 ♪ And I'm not at all anti 1922 02:03:41,040 --> 02:03:43,320 ♪ Pretty things Santy 1923 02:03:43,320 --> 02:03:46,360 ♪ Brings from Cartier's 1924 02:03:46,360 --> 02:03:51,040 ♪ Your devotion I prize 1925 02:03:51,040 --> 02:03:55,320 ♪ But you must realise, my boy 1926 02:03:55,320 --> 02:03:58,280 ♪ Other girls' luxuries 1927 02:03:58,280 --> 02:04:00,600 ♪ Are my necessities 1928 02:04:00,600 --> 02:04:04,040 ♪ So, Buddie, beware... ♪ 1929 02:04:04,040 --> 02:04:06,320 Oh! 1930 02:04:13,080 --> 02:04:18,400 ♪ ..I must warn you that I am simply never on time 1931 02:04:18,400 --> 02:04:21,560 ♪ So, Buddie, beware... ♪ 1932 02:04:28,240 --> 02:04:30,480 Let me down! 1933 02:04:31,840 --> 02:04:36,680 ♪ ..Somehow I don't feel nice when I wear a dress twice 1934 02:04:36,680 --> 02:04:40,480 ♪ So, Buddie, beware... ♪ 1935 02:05:01,840 --> 02:05:04,360 I see London, I see France, 1936 02:05:04,360 --> 02:05:06,560 I know all about your underpants! 1937 02:05:08,960 --> 02:05:10,760 THEY WOBBLE THEIR CHEEKS 1938 02:05:10,760 --> 02:05:12,400 Hello! 1939 02:05:23,960 --> 02:05:26,480 ♪ ..Buddie, beware 1940 02:05:26,480 --> 02:05:28,240 ♪ La-la-la-la 1941 02:05:28,240 --> 02:05:31,800 ♪ Mother, take care 1942 02:05:33,160 --> 02:05:35,680 ♪ Since the day I was weaned 1943 02:05:35,680 --> 02:05:37,920 ♪ I'm a caviar fiend 1944 02:05:37,920 --> 02:05:40,560 ♪ So, Buddie, beware 1945 02:05:41,920 --> 02:05:45,920 ♪ I feel I should put you right 1946 02:05:45,920 --> 02:05:50,000 ♪ As I lie in bed at night 1947 02:05:50,000 --> 02:05:54,320 ♪ While the twinkling stars dream on 1948 02:05:54,320 --> 02:05:56,680 ♪ With my cold cream on 1949 02:05:56,680 --> 02:06:00,960 ♪ I'm a lovely sight 1950 02:06:03,360 --> 02:06:08,840 ♪ And another thing too 1951 02:06:08,840 --> 02:06:13,800 ♪ When I'm married to you, my sweet 1952 02:06:15,200 --> 02:06:16,240 ♪ Ohh... 1953 02:06:18,640 --> 02:06:21,640 ♪ If to come home you fail 1954 02:06:21,640 --> 02:06:27,160 ♪ I'll open all your mail 1955 02:06:27,160 --> 02:06:36,320 ♪ So, Buddie, beware... 1956 02:06:36,320 --> 02:06:39,520 ♪ Whoo-ee! ♪ 1957 02:06:39,520 --> 02:06:41,960 SHE LAUGHS 1958 02:06:43,360 --> 02:06:45,720 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 1959 02:06:51,400 --> 02:06:54,040 UPBEAT ORGAN MUSIC PLAYS 1960 02:07:37,720 --> 02:07:39,360 Dearly beloved, 1961 02:07:39,360 --> 02:07:43,200 we are gathered here together over the bodies... Oh! 1962 02:07:43,200 --> 02:07:45,640 AUDIENCE LAUGHS 1963 02:07:49,640 --> 02:07:52,600 We are assembled here to join together 1964 02:07:52,600 --> 02:07:55,640 in the bonds of holy matrimony this young man... 1965 02:07:55,640 --> 02:07:57,200 Cease and desist! 1966 02:07:57,200 --> 02:07:59,960 BOTH: Cease and desist! 1967 02:07:59,960 --> 02:08:01,760 Good Lord, what is this? 1968 02:08:01,760 --> 02:08:03,480 My colleague and I are barristers 1969 02:08:03,480 --> 02:08:05,840 from the firm of Treacle, Treacle & Custard, 1970 02:08:05,840 --> 02:08:08,480 with offices in New York, London and Singapore. 1971 02:08:08,480 --> 02:08:11,800 We demand a hearing on behalf of our distinguished clients. 1972 02:08:11,800 --> 02:08:13,560 Distinguished clients? 1973 02:08:13,560 --> 02:08:15,960 Permit me to explain. 1974 02:08:15,960 --> 02:08:19,960 My clients have just come completed an extensive peregrination 1975 02:08:19,960 --> 02:08:21,960 in order to confirm most urgently 1976 02:08:21,960 --> 02:08:23,760 with this English gentleman. 1977 02:08:23,760 --> 02:08:27,840 It appears we have arrived in, as it were, the nick of time! 1978 02:08:27,840 --> 02:08:30,920 I'm afraid if you've come in reference to my Hong Kong interests, 1979 02:08:30,920 --> 02:08:33,440 you've chosen a bad moment. I'm about to be married. 1980 02:08:33,440 --> 02:08:35,800 The marriage is impossible. Impossible? 1981 02:08:35,800 --> 02:08:37,600 What on earth do you mean? 1982 02:08:37,600 --> 02:08:42,920 Allow me to introduce the mortified father of little Plum Blossom. 1983 02:08:45,040 --> 02:08:48,600 And who is little Plum Blossom? 1984 02:08:48,600 --> 02:08:50,680 Yes, who is little Plum Blossom? 1985 02:08:50,680 --> 02:08:52,960 This is little Plum Blossom. 1986 02:09:04,440 --> 02:09:06,920 I'm not sure I follow this. 1987 02:09:06,920 --> 02:09:10,520 Lord Evelyn took Plum Blossom to a willow grove 1988 02:09:10,520 --> 02:09:13,040 and returned with a Plum tart. 1989 02:09:14,640 --> 02:09:17,760 Dear me! Is this really true? 1990 02:09:17,760 --> 02:09:24,480 I'm afraid so. Evelyn, is this woman really... Plum tart Blossom? 1991 02:09:24,480 --> 02:09:26,960 I can't really say. 1992 02:09:26,960 --> 02:09:28,880 It all happened so long ago. 1993 02:09:28,880 --> 02:09:30,560 Oh, good Lord! 1994 02:09:30,560 --> 02:09:35,280 Apologies to one and all. But under the circumstances, 1995 02:09:35,280 --> 02:09:38,240 I don't see how I can possibly marry Miss Harcourt. 1996 02:09:38,240 --> 02:09:41,560 Don't be ridiculous. All these people want is money. 1997 02:09:41,560 --> 02:09:43,720 I'll give you $1,000 to clear out. 1998 02:09:43,720 --> 02:09:45,920 We'll take it. Do not insult our clients 1999 02:09:45,920 --> 02:09:47,600 with an offer of filthy money! 2000 02:09:47,600 --> 02:09:50,480 I'll make it $2,000! You cannot buy the honour. 2001 02:09:50,480 --> 02:09:52,400 I'll make it $5,000! 2002 02:09:52,400 --> 02:09:54,240 Yeah, yeah, honour sold. 2003 02:09:54,240 --> 02:09:55,960 No, Mr Whitney, don't pay him. 2004 02:09:55,960 --> 02:09:58,720 No amount of money can undo this great wrong. 2005 02:09:58,720 --> 02:10:02,600 You, sir, you are related to little Plum Blossom? 2006 02:10:02,600 --> 02:10:05,000 Like an O'Neill drama to Whistler's mom. 2007 02:10:05,000 --> 02:10:07,840 Then the only way to repay this debt of honour, Evelyn, 2008 02:10:07,840 --> 02:10:10,120 is for you to offer him...me! 2009 02:10:10,120 --> 02:10:11,680 No! 2010 02:10:11,680 --> 02:10:14,200 Oh, I say! What a marvellous idea! 2011 02:10:14,200 --> 02:10:17,320 Offer accepted! Congratulations, old boy. 2012 02:10:17,320 --> 02:10:20,160 You're getting quite a girl. What about the five grand? 2013 02:10:20,160 --> 02:10:22,800 Say, why does the English gentleman not join the club 2014 02:10:22,800 --> 02:10:25,200 and right the wrong done to poor Plum Blossom? 2015 02:10:25,200 --> 02:10:27,720 Right the wrong done to poor Plum...? Oh, I say. 2016 02:10:27,720 --> 02:10:29,800 HE CHUCKLES 2017 02:10:29,800 --> 02:10:31,800 Well, confound it, why not? 2018 02:10:31,800 --> 02:10:33,600 Now, look here, 2019 02:10:33,600 --> 02:10:35,560 Plum Blossom. 2020 02:10:37,960 --> 02:10:39,640 Will you marry me? 2021 02:10:39,640 --> 02:10:42,760 Oh, sweetie, I thought you'd never ask! 2022 02:10:42,760 --> 02:10:44,560 Why, Mother, what's the matter? 2023 02:10:44,560 --> 02:10:46,240 What's the matter? 2024 02:10:46,240 --> 02:10:48,160 We're poor again! 2025 02:10:48,160 --> 02:10:51,880 I shall have to spend the rest of my life 2026 02:10:51,880 --> 02:10:55,120 living in hotels... 2027 02:10:56,040 --> 02:10:58,120 Like hell you will! 2028 02:10:58,120 --> 02:11:00,400 Marry me, Evangeline! 2029 02:11:00,400 --> 02:11:03,760 Say yes, and spend the rest of your life in the lap of luxury. 2030 02:11:03,760 --> 02:11:05,520 Why, after that amalgamated deal, 2031 02:11:05,520 --> 02:11:08,640 I'm so damn rich I could buy this tub 2032 02:11:08,640 --> 02:11:10,760 and turn it into a private yacht for you. 2033 02:11:10,760 --> 02:11:13,760 Eli! My saviour! 2034 02:11:13,760 --> 02:11:16,880 My knight in shining armour! 2035 02:11:16,880 --> 02:11:20,080 Ah, Mr Whitney... Uh? 2036 02:11:20,080 --> 02:11:22,080 Oh, thank you, Crocker. 2037 02:11:22,080 --> 02:11:24,160 Yes, sir. Crocker! 2038 02:11:24,160 --> 02:11:25,920 How the hell did you get on board? 2039 02:11:25,920 --> 02:11:27,680 I have a confession to make. 2040 02:11:27,680 --> 02:11:30,000 I never made it to the Stock Exchange. 2041 02:11:30,000 --> 02:11:32,000 I stowed away aboard this ship. 2042 02:11:32,000 --> 02:11:35,160 I never sold those amalgamated shares. 2043 02:11:35,160 --> 02:11:38,160 You never sold the shares? You never sold the shares?! 2044 02:11:38,160 --> 02:11:40,480 That means I'm ruined! 2045 02:11:40,480 --> 02:11:41,840 Ruined! 2046 02:11:41,840 --> 02:11:44,600 Oh, I'm sorry, boss. 2047 02:11:44,600 --> 02:11:49,560 Oh, well, at least I have someone to comfort me 2048 02:11:49,560 --> 02:11:51,480 in my misfortune. 2049 02:11:52,720 --> 02:11:57,360 Well... Mr Whitney! Mr Whitney, urgent cable from New York, sir. 2050 02:11:57,360 --> 02:12:00,440 Amalgamated just went through the roof. 2051 02:12:00,440 --> 02:12:02,280 You're a zillionaire. 2052 02:12:02,280 --> 02:12:03,800 Eli! 2053 02:12:05,280 --> 02:12:07,720 How do you do it, boss? 2054 02:12:07,720 --> 02:12:12,360 How? Brains, guts and the world's finest education. 2055 02:12:12,360 --> 02:12:15,800 ♪ Bulldog, bulldog, bow-wow-wow 2056 02:12:15,800 --> 02:12:19,120 ♪ Eli Yale! ♪ 2057 02:12:19,120 --> 02:12:23,800 Speaking of dogs, does this belong to anyone? 2058 02:12:23,800 --> 02:12:26,160 Cheeky! Oh-oh-oh! 2059 02:12:26,160 --> 02:12:28,480 Where have you been? 2060 02:12:28,480 --> 02:12:31,160 We found him in the swimming pool. 2061 02:12:32,480 --> 02:12:35,800 And what was he doing in the swimming pool? 2062 02:12:35,800 --> 02:12:37,880 ALL: The dog paddle! 2063 02:12:39,080 --> 02:12:41,400 All right, Captain, let's get on with it. 2064 02:12:41,400 --> 02:12:44,200 You've got some weddings to perform here. Yeah, come on, Cap. 2065 02:12:44,200 --> 02:12:47,920 I've been waiting all my life to be a lady. Yeah, step in it. 2066 02:12:49,640 --> 02:12:52,640 ♪ We settle down as man and wife 2067 02:12:52,640 --> 02:12:55,760 ♪ To solve the riddle called Married life 2068 02:12:55,760 --> 02:12:58,320 ♪ It's delightful It's delicious 2069 02:12:58,320 --> 02:13:00,600 ♪ It's de-lovely 2070 02:13:00,600 --> 02:13:03,640 ♪ It feels so fine to be a bride 2071 02:13:03,640 --> 02:13:05,200 ♪ And who's the groom? 2072 02:13:05,200 --> 02:13:07,600 ♪ Why, he's slightly fried It's delightful 2073 02:13:07,600 --> 02:13:09,120 ♪ It's delicious 2074 02:13:09,120 --> 02:13:11,320 ♪ It's de-lovely 2075 02:13:11,320 --> 02:13:14,040 ♪ To the pop of champagne 2076 02:13:14,040 --> 02:13:17,320 ♪ Off we hop in our plush little plane 2077 02:13:17,320 --> 02:13:21,400 ♪ Till a bright light through the darkness cosily calls 2078 02:13:21,400 --> 02:13:23,120 ♪ Niagara Falls! 2079 02:13:23,120 --> 02:13:25,640 ♪ All's well, my love Our day's complete 2080 02:13:25,640 --> 02:13:28,280 ♪ And what a beautiful bridal suite 2081 02:13:28,280 --> 02:13:30,880 ♪ It's delightful It's delicious 2082 02:13:30,880 --> 02:13:33,680 ♪ It's delectable It's delirious 2083 02:13:33,680 --> 02:13:35,760 ♪ It's dilemma It's de limit 2084 02:13:35,760 --> 02:13:38,840 ♪ It's deluxe It's de-lovely 2085 02:13:38,840 --> 02:13:41,520 ♪ All is right as can be 2086 02:13:41,520 --> 02:13:44,760 ♪ Till one night at your window you see 2087 02:13:44,760 --> 02:13:49,360 ♪ An absurd bird with a bundle hung from his nose 2088 02:13:49,360 --> 02:13:51,320 ♪ Get baby clothes 2089 02:13:51,320 --> 02:13:53,520 ALL: # Anything goes 2090 02:13:53,520 --> 02:13:55,800 ♪ And though I'm not a great romancer 2091 02:13:55,800 --> 02:14:00,240 ♪ I know that you're bound to answer when I propose 2092 02:14:00,240 --> 02:14:03,400 ♪ Anything goes 2093 02:14:03,400 --> 02:14:09,160 ♪ Anything, anything Anything goes 2094 02:14:09,160 --> 02:14:16,320 ♪ Goes... ♪ 2095 02:14:16,320 --> 02:14:18,840 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 2096 02:14:26,160 --> 02:14:29,000 INSTRUMENTAL: Anything Goes 2097 02:14:29,000 --> 02:14:31,680 AUDIENCE CLAPS IN TIME 2098 02:14:36,920 --> 02:14:39,360 CHEERING 2099 02:15:02,240 --> 02:15:04,320 CHEERING INTENSIFIES 2100 02:15:06,480 --> 02:15:09,000 CHEERING 2101 02:15:24,040 --> 02:15:26,560 CHEERING INTENSIFIES 2102 02:15:31,840 --> 02:15:34,560 CHEERING INTENSIFIES 2103 02:16:13,480 --> 02:16:15,880 CHEERING AND APPLAUSE 145876

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