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1
00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074
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2
00:00:32,298 --> 00:00:33,731
So this is truly exciting...
3
00:00:33,833 --> 00:00:36,165
Two by one equals...
4
00:00:37,670 --> 00:00:40,537
Ah, Andy -- you could
come up here, please?
5
00:00:40,640 --> 00:00:41,698
Ahhh...
6
00:00:42,175 --> 00:00:43,642
Help out Mr. Puckov?
7
00:00:45,211 --> 00:00:47,736
Oh... Andy.
8
00:01:03,863 --> 00:01:04,727
Andy?
9
00:01:23,616 --> 00:01:25,777
Oh, Mr. Puckov.
10
00:01:26,553 --> 00:01:27,918
Oh, I want it.
11
00:01:28,021 --> 00:01:29,613
So bad I can taste it!
12
00:01:31,791 --> 00:01:32,883
Oh, teach me, Mr. P.
13
00:01:35,028 --> 00:01:36,495
Oh yeah, oh yeah.
14
00:01:36,596 --> 00:01:38,791
Ohhh yeah, yeah yeah.
15
00:01:38,898 --> 00:01:40,388
Oh, Mr. Puckov.
16
00:01:40,500 --> 00:01:42,627
Show me how it's done.
17
00:01:47,474 --> 00:01:49,101
Fill my virgin hole!
18
00:01:56,616 --> 00:01:57,878
Oh.
19
00:02:01,354 --> 00:02:02,651
Ooooo, Mr. Puckov.
20
00:02:05,125 --> 00:02:06,558
You're so raw!
21
00:02:07,594 --> 00:02:08,424
Ma!
22
00:02:08,528 --> 00:02:10,689
Did you eat all my
cucumbers again?
23
00:02:10,797 --> 00:02:12,025
Can you knock?!
24
00:02:12,132 --> 00:02:13,599
Well I'm sorry, sweetie.
25
00:02:13,700 --> 00:02:15,634
But every time I go to
make a garden salad...
26
00:02:15,735 --> 00:02:17,669
my vegetables vanish.
27
00:02:17,770 --> 00:02:20,204
I ironed your capand gown for you.
28
00:02:20,306 --> 00:02:22,331
We are so darn proud of you!
29
00:02:22,442 --> 00:02:24,137
Thanks, Mom.
30
00:02:27,547 --> 00:02:30,948
Oh, well... what
happened to your gerbil?
31
00:02:31,050 --> 00:02:34,178
Oh, ah, Sparky,
he... ran away.
32
00:02:37,524 --> 00:02:38,183
Oh.
33
00:02:52,739 --> 00:02:54,673
It's laundry day, Andy.
34
00:02:54,774 --> 00:02:56,765
I need everything dirty.
35
00:02:58,444 --> 00:02:59,376
Oh.
36
00:03:00,079 --> 00:03:01,808
Ready for graduation, son?
37
00:03:01,915 --> 00:03:04,509
Hey, hun -- there's
your cucumber.
38
00:03:04,617 --> 00:03:06,050
Dear Lord!
39
00:03:06,152 --> 00:03:07,551
No, no hun,
that's just a...
40
00:03:07,654 --> 00:03:09,588
shrink wrap they put on
at the supermarket.
41
00:03:09,689 --> 00:03:10,678
Is that not right?
42
00:03:10,790 --> 00:03:11,415
Yes.
43
00:03:12,792 --> 00:03:14,657
Hey, there's my
needle-nosed pliers!
44
00:03:15,495 --> 00:03:16,553
Ahhhhh!
45
00:03:16,663 --> 00:03:19,689
Mommie... Dad.
46
00:03:20,900 --> 00:03:21,924
Now calm down.
47
00:03:22,035 --> 00:03:22,967
Now stop it.
48
00:03:23,069 --> 00:03:24,297
You'll just makeyourself sick.
49
00:03:24,404 --> 00:03:25,234
Okay!
50
00:03:25,338 --> 00:03:27,169
Let's just go outside-this is a man's thing, okay?
51
00:03:27,273 --> 00:03:28,900
Could you get out
of here, please!
52
00:03:29,008 --> 00:03:30,737
Let's just step out here,
and I'll get you some
53
00:03:30,843 --> 00:03:32,435
nitroglycerin, okay?
54
00:03:32,545 --> 00:03:34,979
We'll watch that
Lawrence Welk DVD.
55
00:03:35,081 --> 00:03:36,378
AHHH!
56
00:03:40,553 --> 00:03:42,646
Well, I guess that's
life with a gay son.
57
00:03:45,225 --> 00:03:46,886
Hmmm.
58
00:05:01,634 --> 00:05:03,295
Woo!
59
00:05:03,403 --> 00:05:06,201
Your graduation speech
was awesome, Griff.
60
00:05:06,306 --> 00:05:07,830
I was so proud!
61
00:05:07,940 --> 00:05:09,271
I could always do better.
62
00:05:09,375 --> 00:05:11,070
You're the
Valedictorian, goober!
63
00:05:11,177 --> 00:05:12,735
Congrats on your baseball
scholarship, dude.
64
00:05:12,845 --> 00:05:13,675
Thanks, man.
65
00:05:16,049 --> 00:05:17,744
Welcome to
adulthood, children.
66
00:05:17,850 --> 00:05:19,215
Yay!
67
00:05:26,459 --> 00:05:29,019
So, who's gettin' laid at Muffler's
graduation party tonight?
68
00:05:29,128 --> 00:05:31,460
Well, Mr. Puckov said
he might drop by,
69
00:05:31,564 --> 00:05:33,998
and I'm technically not
his student anymore...
70
00:05:34,100 --> 00:05:35,727
so this could
be my big night.
71
00:05:35,835 --> 00:05:37,302
Heads up, here he comes.
72
00:05:38,304 --> 00:05:40,067
Oh, hello, Boys.
73
00:05:40,173 --> 00:05:42,004
Hearty congratulations.
74
00:05:42,108 --> 00:05:43,439
Thanks, Mr. P.
75
00:05:43,543 --> 00:05:44,669
And I just wanted to say,
76
00:05:44,777 --> 00:05:46,074
that I'm really
gonna miss your ass...
77
00:05:46,179 --> 00:05:47,703
...your class this year.
78
00:05:47,814 --> 00:05:49,679
And we were just wondering
whether or not you're going...
79
00:05:49,782 --> 00:05:51,579
to be coming on any of us
tonight 'cause I'm gonna...
80
00:05:51,684 --> 00:05:53,447
be coming and I would really
like it if you came, too.
81
00:05:55,321 --> 00:05:56,515
We shall see.
82
00:05:58,925 --> 00:06:01,155
Some schools get an
exchange student,
83
00:06:01,260 --> 00:06:03,387
we get an exchange teacher.
84
00:06:04,530 --> 00:06:06,760
Where the heck is
Tartaristan anyway?
85
00:06:06,866 --> 00:06:09,164
The Republic of Tartaristan
is a Muslim state...
86
00:06:09,268 --> 00:06:10,701
in the former Soviet Union.
87
00:06:10,803 --> 00:06:13,533
I believe the
capital is Kazan.
88
00:06:13,639 --> 00:06:15,106
Hey, Daisy!
89
00:06:16,642 --> 00:06:19,304
Forward, forward, good girl!
90
00:06:19,412 --> 00:06:22,279
Have you told her you're
quote "bi" unquote yet?
91
00:06:22,382 --> 00:06:23,406
No way!
92
00:06:23,516 --> 00:06:24,847
You know I don't like labels.
93
00:06:24,951 --> 00:06:26,509
Besides, it would
break her heart.
94
00:06:26,619 --> 00:06:28,018
So shhhh, here she comes.
95
00:06:29,155 --> 00:06:32,784
- Hey, Daze.
- Hi, Nico.
96
00:06:32,892 --> 00:06:36,350
I finished designing
your gown for the party.
97
00:06:36,462 --> 00:06:39,022
We are gonna make, like,
SUCH a cute couple.
98
00:06:39,132 --> 00:06:40,531
Okay, doll.
99
00:06:40,633 --> 00:06:42,692
Love ya, call ya,
drive safe.
100
00:06:46,072 --> 00:06:47,232
News flash, boys.
101
00:06:47,340 --> 00:06:49,274
Looks like I'm finally
takin' the plunge.
102
00:06:49,375 --> 00:06:50,399
Do tell.
103
00:06:50,510 --> 00:06:52,171
I've got a date and
he is totally my type.
104
00:06:52,278 --> 00:06:54,872
Oh?
And how do you define that?
105
00:06:54,981 --> 00:06:56,710
I'm an ASSMAN, son.
106
00:06:58,184 --> 00:07:00,015
Asses aren't all they're
cracked up to be.
107
00:07:00,119 --> 00:07:02,917
I personally prefer
a prodigious penis.
108
00:07:03,022 --> 00:07:05,616
You outta know, Griff.
I remember from 8th grade,
109
00:07:05,725 --> 00:07:08,421
yours is like WOW.
110
00:07:10,229 --> 00:07:12,163
What the FUUUUUCK!
111
00:07:15,768 --> 00:07:17,099
How you doin?!
112
00:07:17,203 --> 00:07:20,969
You boys still talkin' 'bout
pussy, steada gettin' it?
113
00:07:21,073 --> 00:07:22,438
Ha, ha, ha.
114
00:07:22,542 --> 00:07:24,669
Might wanna return those
shriveled-up skin flutes...
115
00:07:24,777 --> 00:07:28,406
of yours for a refund if you're
not gonna fuckin' use 'em.
116
00:07:28,514 --> 00:07:30,675
Hello, I've used mine.
117
00:07:30,783 --> 00:07:32,842
I mean... like for
blowjobs-n-stuff.
118
00:07:32,952 --> 00:07:39,653
Wake up, kids -- Fact is, none
of ya has done "the big A."
119
00:07:39,759 --> 00:07:40,817
The what?
120
00:07:40,927 --> 00:07:42,952
ANAL, dudes.
121
00:07:43,062 --> 00:07:48,193
You know, sausage-smugglin',
fudge-packin'...
122
00:07:48,301 --> 00:07:51,429
the old Hershey highway.
123
00:07:51,537 --> 00:07:52,799
Ewww!
124
00:07:52,905 --> 00:07:55,203
Well, my date's the captain
of the St. Mary's football team.
125
00:07:55,975 --> 00:07:57,408
And I think he's a bottom.
126
00:07:57,510 --> 00:08:00,240
All Catholics are
bottoms, my friend.
127
00:08:01,747 --> 00:08:04,238
Take it from the Muff-ster.
128
00:08:07,386 --> 00:08:09,581
I expect all of you
booty-virgins...
129
00:08:09,689 --> 00:08:12,283
will be coming to
my party tonight?
130
00:08:12,391 --> 00:08:13,756
We'll be there.
131
00:08:13,860 --> 00:08:14,827
Mmm-hmm.
132
00:08:14,927 --> 00:08:16,895
Ah, ha-ha...
133
00:08:17,563 --> 00:08:18,894
She is so full of shit.
134
00:08:18,998 --> 00:08:23,958
She probably never even
touched a... triangle.
135
00:08:24,070 --> 00:08:26,095
Ewww!
136
00:08:31,077 --> 00:08:32,510
I guess Muffler's
right, though.
137
00:08:32,612 --> 00:08:35,308
Scientifically speaking,
we're all still virgins.
138
00:08:35,414 --> 00:08:37,780
Guess I don't have to feel
like a TOTAL loser, then.
139
00:08:37,884 --> 00:08:40,216
Well, at least the rest of
us have SOME experience.
140
00:08:40,319 --> 00:08:43,015
Thanks, Jarod,
that feels nice.
141
00:08:43,122 --> 00:08:44,953
Can't we talk about
something else please?
142
00:08:45,057 --> 00:08:47,753
Coming-out stories
are pass๏ฟฝ bourgeoisie!
143
00:08:47,860 --> 00:08:50,556
This isn't about coming-out,
we're WAY past that.
144
00:08:50,663 --> 00:08:53,564
The topic is anus copulus.
145
00:08:54,834 --> 00:08:56,825
Hi-ya kids.
146
00:08:56,936 --> 00:08:58,631
Hi, Mrs. Hunter.
147
00:08:58,738 --> 00:09:03,607
Garsh darn, that Wal-Mart sure
does have a nice photo shop.
148
00:09:03,709 --> 00:09:06,940
If ya ask me, you and Daisy
shoulda been voted...
149
00:09:07,046 --> 00:09:09,105
King and Queen of the Prom.
150
00:09:14,453 --> 00:09:15,750
Mom!
151
00:09:15,855 --> 00:09:16,685
Oh!
152
00:09:22,628 --> 00:09:24,892
Don't you think it's about
time you came out to her?
153
00:09:24,997 --> 00:09:26,328
Are you kidding me?
154
00:09:26,432 --> 00:09:28,195
She doesn't have a clue.
155
00:09:28,301 --> 00:09:30,633
What about your
unique fashion sense?
156
00:09:30,736 --> 00:09:32,601
Your obsession
with gay cinema?
157
00:09:32,705 --> 00:09:34,297
Your lip gloss!?
158
00:09:35,741 --> 00:09:39,142
Mom suffers from an acute case
of "Paul Lynde Syndrome."
159
00:09:39,779 --> 00:09:41,713
She just thinks
I'm "special."
160
00:09:45,251 --> 00:09:48,152
Hey, who's Paul Lynde?
161
00:09:48,254 --> 00:09:49,448
Is he hot?
162
00:09:52,024 --> 00:09:53,787
Oh my goodness.
163
00:09:56,228 --> 00:09:57,957
So, Jarod.
164
00:09:58,064 --> 00:10:04,560
Did you ever like... you know, get to
third base... like, finger someone?
165
00:10:04,670 --> 00:10:07,002
Yeah, of course.
166
00:10:09,375 --> 00:10:11,502
So... what's it feel like?
167
00:10:14,547 --> 00:10:19,041
Like warm Quiche Lorraine.
168
00:10:23,623 --> 00:10:25,352
Ohhhh...
169
00:10:29,762 --> 00:10:30,228
Muff-ster!
170
00:10:30,496 --> 00:10:30,985
Muff-ster!
171
00:10:31,230 --> 00:10:31,753
Muff-ster!
172
00:10:32,031 --> 00:10:32,520
Muff-ster!
173
00:10:36,669 --> 00:10:38,261
What the fuck!
174
00:10:38,371 --> 00:10:39,861
How you do-in', man?
175
00:10:39,972 --> 00:10:41,439
Ha-ha-HA!
176
00:10:41,540 --> 00:10:43,235
Ladies.
177
00:10:43,342 --> 00:10:46,311
Anything I can do to make
your stay more comfortable...
178
00:10:46,412 --> 00:10:47,879
Hey, thanks for
letting us come, Muffler.
179
00:10:49,582 --> 00:10:52,050
Cindy, you
brought the twins.
180
00:10:53,252 --> 00:10:55,914
Welcome to my maxi-pad.
181
00:10:59,125 --> 00:11:00,990
Attractive garment.
182
00:11:01,093 --> 00:11:02,856
Nice COCK-tail.
183
00:11:02,962 --> 00:11:05,522
It's a Tijuana Sling.
184
00:11:05,631 --> 00:11:07,428
The new cosmo, Kojak.
185
00:11:07,533 --> 00:11:09,330
How festive.
186
00:11:09,435 --> 00:11:11,767
Now pull the cork outta
your ass and maybe...
187
00:11:11,871 --> 00:11:13,236
someone will fuck it.
188
00:11:17,643 --> 00:11:19,736
What the fuuuuck!
189
00:11:22,715 --> 00:11:23,943
Who's he?
190
00:11:28,020 --> 00:11:29,612
He's practically perfect.
191
00:11:29,722 --> 00:11:31,189
Yeah, sure.
192
00:11:31,290 --> 00:11:33,349
But what did hescore on the SAT?
193
00:11:47,540 --> 00:11:50,805
So... whaddaya think?
194
00:11:50,910 --> 00:11:52,207
Isn't Tyler hot?
195
00:11:52,311 --> 00:11:53,744
You're the stud, man.
196
00:11:53,846 --> 00:11:58,180
Yes, sir, he puts the
ZZZ's in Aberzombie.
197
00:12:00,286 --> 00:12:01,446
What do I care?
198
00:12:01,554 --> 00:12:03,749
He's a PNP power-bottom!
199
00:12:03,856 --> 00:12:05,721
Cool.
200
00:12:07,059 --> 00:12:08,788
What's PNP?
201
00:12:11,430 --> 00:12:12,897
Heck if I know.
202
00:12:17,169 --> 00:12:19,069
Who is that?
203
00:12:19,171 --> 00:12:21,639
Like, that's
Muffler's Grandpa!
204
00:12:21,741 --> 00:12:25,575
Ahsooo... he raise-a Dawn
after she parent die...
205
00:12:25,678 --> 00:12:27,441
in a Humvee accident.
206
00:12:27,546 --> 00:12:29,741
He looks likethe Marlboro Man.
207
00:12:29,849 --> 00:12:32,317
Dude's a fuckin'GILWAD, girl.
208
00:12:32,418 --> 00:12:34,613
What's a GILWAD. Buffi?
209
00:12:34,720 --> 00:12:38,417
G.I.L.W.A.D.
210
00:12:38,524 --> 00:12:40,719
"Grandpa I'd let
wine and dine me.
211
00:12:40,826 --> 00:12:42,453
pay for bigger
breast implants,
212
00:12:42,561 --> 00:12:45,257
and then fuck them
till I cum silicone."
213
00:12:45,364 --> 00:12:48,231
But this-a too many
letters, Buffi.
214
00:12:48,334 --> 00:12:49,995
Does not-a add up.
215
00:12:50,102 --> 00:12:53,196
I am a cheerleader, Tiki,
not a calculator.
216
00:13:04,450 --> 00:13:07,419
So you're like All-State
baseball, right?
217
00:13:09,121 --> 00:13:11,487
I heard you got a
full ride at UCLA.
218
00:13:12,658 --> 00:13:14,489
Yeah, whatever.
219
00:13:14,593 --> 00:13:17,721
God, you are so
straight-acting.
220
00:13:17,830 --> 00:13:20,765
Mind if I pretend you're
actually straight?
221
00:13:22,301 --> 00:13:24,292
Pretend whatever you want.
222
00:13:33,012 --> 00:13:35,071
Holy moley,
there he is!
223
00:13:45,524 --> 00:13:47,287
Tonight's the night,
I feel it in my bone.
224
00:13:48,494 --> 00:13:51,588
Word on the street is,
Mr. P. likes big shooters.
225
00:13:51,697 --> 00:13:53,961
Legend has it that in
college he had to have his...
226
00:13:54,066 --> 00:13:58,696
stomach pumped after he
serviced the entire golf squad.
227
00:13:58,804 --> 00:14:00,362
Big-time cum whore!
228
00:14:01,807 --> 00:14:03,775
Well I'll give him a
ride he'll never forget.
229
00:14:03,876 --> 00:14:04,774
Yeah!
230
00:14:04,877 --> 00:14:08,574
Say I'm Fuckov.
What would you do to me?
231
00:14:08,681 --> 00:14:11,775
Yeah, but you look
more like Ms. Mann.
232
00:14:13,352 --> 00:14:18,654
Ha ha - yeah, that's funny.
233
00:14:20,726 --> 00:14:23,854
Oooooh. Mr. Puckov -
yeah, you're so butch!
234
00:14:23,963 --> 00:14:28,263
Oh yeah... those strap-on plastic
balls banging against my ass!
235
00:14:29,902 --> 00:14:32,336
Yeah, oh I'm gonna shoot,
oh I'm gonna shoot!
236
00:14:32,438 --> 00:14:36,704
Ooooooohh Mr. Puckov --
I wanna have your BABY!
237
00:14:39,645 --> 00:14:43,046
Oh, ah, I wasn't talking
about you, Mr. Puckov.
238
00:14:43,148 --> 00:14:45,207
I was talking about a
different Mr. Puckov.
239
00:14:45,317 --> 00:14:46,341
Your... Dad!
240
00:14:46,452 --> 00:14:47,885
Thank you.
241
00:15:02,134 --> 00:15:03,101
So.
242
00:15:03,202 --> 00:15:05,602
You gonna take those off?
243
00:15:05,704 --> 00:15:06,636
Maybe.
244
00:15:06,739 --> 00:15:07,569
Good.
245
00:15:07,673 --> 00:15:09,504
'Cause I want you inside me.
246
00:15:15,915 --> 00:15:17,246
Ah, no.
247
00:15:17,349 --> 00:15:19,647
I'm allergic to latex.
248
00:15:21,553 --> 00:15:23,851
Bareback me, straight-boy.
249
00:15:26,091 --> 00:15:29,618
Ahhhhhhh!
250
00:15:31,297 --> 00:15:33,663
Ah... so much better.
251
00:15:39,939 --> 00:15:41,964
I had it made.
252
00:15:42,074 --> 00:15:48,479
Home free and then he went
and blew chunks all over me!
253
00:15:50,416 --> 00:15:52,247
Every dog has his day, J.
254
00:15:54,753 --> 00:15:58,985
Unfortunately, our lives
aren't coming-of-age films...
255
00:15:59,091 --> 00:16:02,254
where everyone magically
gets laid at the climax.
256
00:16:03,862 --> 00:16:06,797
This isn't
American Pie, Mary.
257
00:16:06,899 --> 00:16:09,800
What's a boy gotta do
to get some MAN SNATCH?!
258
00:16:11,103 --> 00:16:12,400
Deeper, Billy.
259
00:16:12,504 --> 00:16:14,199
Harder!
260
00:16:14,306 --> 00:16:16,240
I love you, Trena.
261
00:16:17,743 --> 00:16:19,643
What is wrong
with this picture?
262
00:16:19,745 --> 00:16:23,545
Everyone's kickin' it,
'cept us.
263
00:16:23,649 --> 00:16:25,776
If the heteros can have
pre-marital intercourse,
264
00:16:25,884 --> 00:16:27,283
we homos should, too.
265
00:16:28,921 --> 00:16:33,153
Hey, why don't you and
Griff just fuck each other?
266
00:16:37,196 --> 00:16:39,562
Ewww -- no.
267
00:16:39,665 --> 00:16:41,599
We're like brothers!
268
00:16:41,700 --> 00:16:45,227
Besides, we're both
exclusive tops.
269
00:16:45,337 --> 00:16:48,670
And regardless, he
is so not my type.
270
00:16:48,774 --> 00:16:49,741
Oh yeah?
271
00:16:49,842 --> 00:16:51,104
What's wrong with me?
272
00:16:55,581 --> 00:16:57,344
Yeeeeeeeees!
273
00:16:57,449 --> 00:17:00,907
Plow that PUSSY!
274
00:17:02,421 --> 00:17:04,013
Oh my goodness.
275
00:17:26,078 --> 00:17:28,410
Like, thanks, Dawn.
I'll never forget this.
276
00:17:28,514 --> 00:17:29,981
Pleasure's all mine, Suzi.
277
00:17:39,124 --> 00:17:40,716
Dawn's awesome!
278
00:17:50,469 --> 00:17:53,336
Thanks for showing
me my G-spot, Dawn.
279
00:17:53,439 --> 00:17:55,236
Anytime, Buffi.
280
00:18:02,581 --> 00:18:04,048
My GOD.
281
00:18:10,589 --> 00:18:11,988
Bye, Tiki.
282
00:18:13,459 --> 00:18:17,225
Dawn make-a Tiki leaky.
283
00:18:20,265 --> 00:18:21,755
Oooh!
284
00:18:21,867 --> 00:18:24,199
Me love you long time.
285
00:18:33,112 --> 00:18:40,712
Once Dawn strikes.
they ALL go dyke.
286
00:18:40,819 --> 00:18:42,548
Virgins.
287
00:18:42,654 --> 00:18:44,212
What the fuuuck!
288
00:18:45,491 --> 00:18:46,788
What the fuuuck!?
289
00:18:51,230 --> 00:18:52,424
Muffler.
290
00:18:52,531 --> 00:18:53,998
She lays half the
cheerleading squad...
291
00:18:54,099 --> 00:18:55,930
and we can't even
cop a hand-job!
292
00:18:56,034 --> 00:18:59,629
We're all gonna go to
college... virgins!
293
00:18:59,738 --> 00:19:01,103
Brainstorm, boyz.
294
00:19:01,206 --> 00:19:03,197
We just need to make a pact.
295
00:19:03,308 --> 00:19:05,640
We all get laid before
the end of the summer.
296
00:19:05,744 --> 00:19:07,769
As if we haven't
been trying already.
297
00:19:07,880 --> 00:19:10,144
We don't know
shit about anal.
298
00:19:10,249 --> 00:19:13,241
Maybe we've been taking
the wrong approach.
299
00:19:13,352 --> 00:19:17,516
Maybe what we need...
is someone to teach us.
300
00:19:17,623 --> 00:19:19,284
Certainly logical.
301
00:19:19,391 --> 00:19:21,450
But... who?
302
00:19:21,560 --> 00:19:27,260
College guys, older dudes,
men with experience.
303
00:19:27,366 --> 00:19:30,392
Studs who can break us in and
show us how to kick it RIGHT.
304
00:19:30,502 --> 00:19:33,062
I'm beginning to
like this idea.
305
00:19:33,172 --> 00:19:36,801
Guys our age are sexually and
emotionally immature anyway.
306
00:19:36,909 --> 00:19:40,743
I want a seasoned older
gentleman who can fuck...
307
00:19:40,846 --> 00:19:42,837
all night and then
discuss the filmography...
308
00:19:42,948 --> 00:19:44,643
of Shelly Winters in the morning.
309
00:19:44,750 --> 00:19:46,877
Perhaps what you
want is a daddy.
310
00:19:46,985 --> 00:19:48,714
No way, horsecock!
311
00:19:48,820 --> 00:19:52,221
It's just
older men are... HOT!
312
00:19:52,324 --> 00:19:54,849
Our very virginity is
at stake here, fellas.
313
00:19:54,960 --> 00:19:56,951
This is it, this summer.
314
00:19:57,062 --> 00:20:00,225
This is our chance to make
all our fantasies come true!
315
00:20:00,332 --> 00:20:01,128
YES!
316
00:20:01,833 --> 00:20:05,735
First we each need to define
whether we're top or a bottom.
317
00:20:07,239 --> 00:20:10,072
Well, wait... we
have to choose?
318
00:20:10,175 --> 00:20:12,769
Well I, for one, am 100% top.
319
00:20:12,878 --> 00:20:15,278
Of course, me too.
320
00:20:15,380 --> 00:20:16,938
Who would want anything
up their butthole,
321
00:20:17,049 --> 00:20:17,947
in the first place?
322
00:20:20,619 --> 00:20:22,246
I hope you're
writing this down.
323
00:20:22,354 --> 00:20:24,151
But... I could be
into a dude, like,
324
00:20:24,256 --> 00:20:26,850
you know... taking control.
325
00:20:26,959 --> 00:20:29,291
Riding me.
326
00:20:29,394 --> 00:20:32,591
I'm putting you down
as a "submissive top."
327
00:20:32,698 --> 00:20:34,359
Not that I wouldn't consider
something in my back door.
328
00:20:34,466 --> 00:20:35,592
As long as it was small.
329
00:20:35,701 --> 00:20:37,328
Like, a finger.
330
00:20:37,436 --> 00:20:40,530
Submissive top,
pinky bottom.
331
00:20:40,639 --> 00:20:45,133
Isn't anyone "bottom curious?"
332
00:20:45,244 --> 00:20:48,270
What are you
curious about, Andy?
333
00:20:48,380 --> 00:20:51,042
Ohhh... ahhhh... we were
just talkin about...
334
00:20:51,149 --> 00:20:53,515
where do you get
your hair done,
335
00:20:53,619 --> 00:20:56,315
cause my mom is looking
for a new place?
336
00:20:56,421 --> 00:20:58,184
Oh, thanks.
337
00:20:58,290 --> 00:21:01,123
I highly recommend
Wal-Mart's Beauty Salon.
338
00:21:01,226 --> 00:21:03,126
Tell her to ask
for Mr. Lance.
339
00:21:03,228 --> 00:21:06,095
He is a genius with
a curling iron...
340
00:21:06,198 --> 00:21:09,793
and such a flirt!
341
00:21:13,705 --> 00:21:15,002
See!?
342
00:21:15,107 --> 00:21:18,133
She just doesn't get it.
343
00:21:18,243 --> 00:21:19,039
What about you, Griff?
344
00:21:19,144 --> 00:21:20,475
Still thinkin'
you're a top-daddy?
345
00:21:20,579 --> 00:21:21,944
Yes.
346
00:21:22,047 --> 00:21:24,072
But I don't know.
347
00:21:24,182 --> 00:21:26,514
I mean, it's all
so theoretical.
348
00:21:26,618 --> 00:21:29,746
That leaves you, Andy.
349
00:21:29,855 --> 00:21:31,982
Well I'm a top -- of course!
350
00:21:32,090 --> 00:21:35,355
"PUSSYBOY IN DENIAL."
351
00:21:36,928 --> 00:21:40,056
Okay, so... we all agree that
we're gonna fulfill the pact...
352
00:21:40,165 --> 00:21:42,599
by penetrating a
member of the same sex.
353
00:21:42,701 --> 00:21:43,793
What's the deadline?
354
00:21:43,902 --> 00:21:46,200
Muffler's Labor Day
Bash makes good sense.
355
00:21:46,305 --> 00:21:47,704
That gives us the
entire summer.
356
00:21:47,806 --> 00:21:48,773
All in favor?
357
00:21:48,874 --> 00:21:50,102
Aye.
358
00:21:50,208 --> 00:21:51,675
Motion's carried.
359
00:21:51,777 --> 00:21:57,409
Ready or not,
butt love here we COME!
360
00:22:27,212 --> 00:22:29,680
Okay, okay -- a little
to the left, honey.
361
00:22:29,781 --> 00:22:31,578
Right there, great.
362
00:22:31,683 --> 00:22:32,911
Now zoom out.
363
00:22:37,389 --> 00:22:38,981
I bet you look so handsome!
364
00:23:07,152 --> 00:23:10,280
Who's my daddy?
365
00:23:22,701 --> 00:23:23,497
- Son, I...
- Dad!
366
00:23:23,602 --> 00:23:25,433
Oh, dear Lord!
367
00:23:25,537 --> 00:23:26,595
Can you knock?!
368
00:23:27,305 --> 00:23:28,272
Oh, jeez.
369
00:23:28,373 --> 00:23:29,897
- I was...
- I had...
370
00:23:30,008 --> 00:23:31,407
I didn't seen anything.
371
00:23:31,510 --> 00:23:32,477
Okay.
372
00:23:32,577 --> 00:23:34,272
Whatever it was
you were doing...
373
00:23:34,379 --> 00:23:36,244
it's completely normal.
374
00:23:36,348 --> 00:23:38,509
What were you doing, anyway?
375
00:23:40,652 --> 00:23:42,517
I was... grooming myself.
376
00:23:43,955 --> 00:23:45,616
Is that a gay thing, son?
377
00:23:45,724 --> 00:23:46,656
I don't know.
378
00:23:46,758 --> 00:23:47,725
Do you shave yourself?
379
00:23:47,826 --> 00:23:49,088
- Well...
- No!
380
00:23:49,194 --> 00:23:50,525
You don't have
to answer that.
381
00:23:52,864 --> 00:23:56,027
Andy... in light of what
happened the other day...
382
00:23:56,134 --> 00:23:59,160
I thought that you deserved
an early birthday present.
383
00:23:59,271 --> 00:24:00,795
Thank you.
384
00:24:05,010 --> 00:24:05,999
Well... open her up?
385
00:24:09,915 --> 00:24:10,973
What is it?
386
00:24:11,416 --> 00:24:12,075
It's a butt plug.
387
00:24:13,385 --> 00:24:14,943
The butt plug,
Andy, is a device,
388
00:24:15,053 --> 00:24:17,078
generally made of
polyurethane,
389
00:24:17,189 --> 00:24:20,056
used to stimulate
the anal cavity.
390
00:24:20,158 --> 00:24:22,183
This, of course, is
the deluxe model.
391
00:24:22,294 --> 00:24:26,025
and ah... this is the
starter model, of course,
392
00:24:26,131 --> 00:24:28,929
with the handy suction base.
393
00:24:29,034 --> 00:24:29,693
Viola.
394
00:24:35,807 --> 00:24:37,570
"Anal Pleasure and Health"?
395
00:24:37,676 --> 00:24:39,405
Oh, Andy.
396
00:24:39,511 --> 00:24:41,945
This book was
VERY informative.
397
00:24:42,047 --> 00:24:44,572
In fact, I took the liberty
of highlighting some of the...
398
00:24:44,683 --> 00:24:47,777
passages under the chapter
"Getting to Know Your Sphincter."
399
00:24:47,886 --> 00:24:49,513
Ewwww.
400
00:24:50,322 --> 00:24:51,983
Oh, Andy, Andy Andy.
401
00:24:52,791 --> 00:24:55,021
Being the receptive partner
in a homosexual relationship...
402
00:24:55,126 --> 00:24:57,321
is nothing to be
ashamed about.
403
00:24:57,429 --> 00:24:58,054
Okay?
404
00:24:58,163 --> 00:24:58,993
Yeah, thank you.
405
00:24:59,097 --> 00:25:00,689
Okay. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah.
406
00:25:01,433 --> 00:25:05,267
In fact, this figure here 7.2
demonstrates the remarkable...
407
00:25:05,370 --> 00:25:07,065
adaptability of
the human anus.
408
00:25:08,039 --> 00:25:09,370
Oh My God!
409
00:25:09,474 --> 00:25:10,304
What?
410
00:25:10,408 --> 00:25:10,931
Look...
411
00:25:11,042 --> 00:25:11,599
Yeah!
412
00:25:11,710 --> 00:25:13,177
Okay, Dad - thank you!
413
00:25:13,278 --> 00:25:14,472
That's incredible, isn't it?
414
00:25:23,688 --> 00:25:24,848
What are these?
415
00:25:24,956 --> 00:25:28,221
Oh, those are
for your mother.
416
00:25:28,326 --> 00:25:30,294
I sure know here size.
417
00:25:30,395 --> 00:25:33,125
Okay, I thought this
went very, very well.
418
00:25:33,231 --> 00:25:35,927
And if you have anything else
that you wish to talk about,
419
00:25:36,034 --> 00:25:38,127
you feel free to come
knocking on my door,
420
00:25:38,236 --> 00:25:40,568
or call me, or even
a text message.
421
00:25:40,672 --> 00:25:41,866
- Okay?
- Okay.
422
00:25:41,973 --> 00:25:43,941
Great, it's just been great.
And ah, we'll talk.
423
00:25:45,110 --> 00:25:45,633
Sorry.
424
00:26:04,396 --> 00:26:05,055
Come on, Andy!
425
00:26:13,071 --> 00:26:14,265
Come on now.
426
00:26:15,073 --> 00:26:16,938
You got it, you got it.
427
00:26:17,776 --> 00:26:18,435
Oh yeah.
428
00:26:22,581 --> 00:26:23,946
Strike two!
429
00:26:24,683 --> 00:26:26,116
You can do it, Andy.
430
00:26:26,217 --> 00:26:27,479
You must "fuck-us".
431
00:26:53,378 --> 00:26:56,347
Go Andy, run, run!
432
00:27:13,031 --> 00:27:15,329
Strike three,
you're out!
433
00:27:28,446 --> 00:27:29,640
Yo.
434
00:27:29,748 --> 00:27:31,238
I'm Beau.
435
00:27:31,349 --> 00:27:33,010
Hey.
436
00:27:33,118 --> 00:27:34,415
Jarod.
437
00:27:34,519 --> 00:27:37,886
So... do you pitch or catch?
438
00:27:41,026 --> 00:27:41,856
I pitch.
439
00:27:44,095 --> 00:27:45,722
How 'bout you?
440
00:27:45,830 --> 00:27:48,390
Pitcher, in the streets.
441
00:27:49,801 --> 00:27:51,701
Catcher in the sheets.
442
00:27:56,808 --> 00:27:57,706
Strike one.
443
00:28:00,879 --> 00:28:07,580
So, what are the chances of us
playing some ball sometime?
444
00:28:07,686 --> 00:28:10,951
What are the chances of you
whackin' this ball over that fence?
445
00:28:59,337 --> 00:29:01,737
Did you know the male animal
can achieve orgasm...
446
00:29:01,840 --> 00:29:04,172
without even stimulating his shaft?
447
00:29:04,275 --> 00:29:09,542
Ah, hello - Did YOU know
Muffler is spreading a rumor...
448
00:29:09,647 --> 00:29:16,177
that Mr. Puckov trolls chatrooms
under the screen name "Rodzilla."
449
00:29:16,287 --> 00:29:17,447
HOT!
450
00:29:18,923 --> 00:29:23,451
Wish me luck, boys, I just
booked a date with baseball boy.
451
00:29:23,561 --> 00:29:25,085
Oh yeah?
452
00:29:25,196 --> 00:29:27,596
What's his name, anyway?
453
00:29:27,699 --> 00:29:28,757
Biff?
454
00:29:28,867 --> 00:29:29,697
Blaine?
455
00:29:29,801 --> 00:29:32,395
BLAND?
456
00:29:32,504 --> 00:29:33,596
Beau!
457
00:29:33,705 --> 00:29:35,570
And why do you keep
bustin' on him, like that?
458
00:29:35,673 --> 00:29:37,140
He's like perfect!
459
00:29:37,242 --> 00:29:38,402
Perfectly boring!
460
00:29:38,510 --> 00:29:40,375
YIPPEE!
461
00:29:40,478 --> 00:29:43,845
I got a response,
I got a response.
462
00:29:43,948 --> 00:29:47,008
Okay, the internet IS
the way to hook up!
463
00:29:47,118 --> 00:29:50,679
He's a little young
for me, but...
464
00:29:50,789 --> 00:29:55,317
He loves Liza with a
Z, and role playing,
465
00:29:55,426 --> 00:29:57,451
and investment banking.
466
00:29:57,562 --> 00:29:58,756
Ka-ching.
467
00:30:02,901 --> 00:30:04,562
Damn!
468
00:30:04,669 --> 00:30:06,637
That's almost as
big as Griff's.
469
00:30:10,275 --> 00:30:11,299
You okay?
470
00:30:12,277 --> 00:30:14,177
I've got a headache.
471
00:30:14,279 --> 00:30:17,339
There's aspirin in my
Dad's... medicine cabinet.
472
00:30:22,253 --> 00:30:23,379
Where's the soap?
473
00:30:31,696 --> 00:30:32,458
Score.
474
00:31:10,635 --> 00:31:11,602
Yes!
475
00:31:11,703 --> 00:31:12,761
I'm growing!
476
00:31:23,214 --> 00:31:24,112
It's stuck!
477
00:31:47,171 --> 00:31:48,001
What the...?
478
00:31:49,140 --> 00:31:50,573
Son!
What is going on?
479
00:31:53,311 --> 00:31:54,300
Help!
480
00:31:54,412 --> 00:31:55,879
Get it off me!
481
00:31:55,980 --> 00:31:57,504
Okay, don't panic.
482
00:31:57,615 --> 00:31:59,014
We can do this
together, okay.
483
00:31:59,117 --> 00:32:03,281
I'm gonna brace, and
you brace, and you PULL!
484
00:32:03,388 --> 00:32:05,549
FUCK!
485
00:32:05,657 --> 00:32:07,181
Awwwwwwww!
486
00:32:07,292 --> 00:32:09,021
Okay, I have another idea.
487
00:32:09,127 --> 00:32:11,561
Now, hold on there - and
I'm gonna smash this bugger!
488
00:32:13,097 --> 00:32:15,190
Fire in the hole!
489
00:32:15,300 --> 00:32:16,858
FIRE!
490
00:32:19,404 --> 00:32:20,928
Aaaaah!
491
00:32:25,109 --> 00:32:26,736
Aaaaaaahhh!
492
00:32:28,846 --> 00:32:32,338
Aaaaaaaaahhhh!
493
00:32:35,353 --> 00:32:39,915
You know, kids... penis length
is nothing to be ashamed about.
494
00:32:40,024 --> 00:32:40,820
Dad.
495
00:32:42,327 --> 00:32:45,353
I frequently measured my ownpenis when I was your age.
496
00:32:45,463 --> 00:32:47,260
Matter of fact, I still do.
497
00:32:47,365 --> 00:32:50,857
But no matter where
I place that ruler,
498
00:32:50,969 --> 00:32:53,733
darned if I can
break five inches.
499
00:32:53,838 --> 00:32:58,537
So, Jarod. I know what it'slike to feel insecure...
500
00:32:58,643 --> 00:33:00,611
about your manhood.
501
00:33:01,879 --> 00:33:04,404
Well, it all started back
in my Navy days...
502
00:33:04,515 --> 00:33:07,075
you know, showering with
my fellow seamen.
503
00:33:07,185 --> 00:33:08,413
Oh my God.
504
00:33:08,519 --> 00:33:13,320
Yes, siree... oh boy, we spent
a lot of time in the showers.
505
00:33:13,424 --> 00:33:14,755
There was this one sailor...
506
00:33:14,859 --> 00:33:18,317
Zeke McGee was his name,
gosh darned if Zeke's "snake"...
507
00:33:18,429 --> 00:33:21,091
didn't hang down
past his knees.
508
00:33:21,199 --> 00:33:24,498
And if I close my eyes
and think about it...
509
00:33:24,602 --> 00:33:28,129
I can SMELL it,
like it was yesterday.
510
00:33:28,239 --> 00:33:32,733
Do you still keep in
touch with Big Zeke?
511
00:33:32,844 --> 00:33:34,106
Now that
you mention it...
512
00:33:34,212 --> 00:33:36,874
Dad!
Thank you for rescuing Jarod.
513
00:33:36,981 --> 00:33:38,972
Now will you please
get out of here.
514
00:33:39,083 --> 00:33:39,913
Certainly.
515
00:33:40,018 --> 00:33:41,110
But before I go,
I just want to say...
516
00:33:41,219 --> 00:33:43,847
that I really enjoyed
our little chat.
517
00:33:46,257 --> 00:33:47,554
Oh my goodness.
518
00:33:53,264 --> 00:33:55,289
Step, step, PUNCH!
519
00:33:55,400 --> 00:33:57,027
Step, step.
520
00:33:57,135 --> 00:33:59,797
Bounce... bounce bounce!
521
00:33:59,904 --> 00:34:01,565
Step, step, PUNCH!
522
00:34:01,672 --> 00:34:03,401
Step, step, PUNCH!
523
00:34:03,508 --> 00:34:04,941
Sweat!
524
00:34:05,043 --> 00:34:06,977
Bounce, bounce.
525
00:34:09,514 --> 00:34:11,277
Step, step, PUNCH!
526
00:34:11,382 --> 00:34:13,077
Down!
527
00:34:13,184 --> 00:34:14,947
Bounce, bounce.
528
00:34:15,053 --> 00:34:16,418
Step, PUNCH!
529
00:34:20,758 --> 00:34:21,918
Arch your backs.
530
00:34:24,629 --> 00:34:25,596
Alright, alright.
531
00:34:25,696 --> 00:34:27,186
Take five, take five,
booty break.
532
00:34:29,167 --> 00:34:30,759
My God... she's is
such a slavedriver!
533
00:34:30,868 --> 00:34:32,631
I know, my ass has
NEVER been tighter.
534
00:34:40,878 --> 00:34:42,140
Yo, yo.
535
00:34:42,246 --> 00:34:44,214
What's wrong, dawg?
536
00:34:44,315 --> 00:34:47,648
I need more maximus
in my gluteus.
537
00:34:47,752 --> 00:34:50,118
You lookin' fine to me, Papi.
538
00:34:54,258 --> 00:34:55,156
Whassup?
539
00:34:55,259 --> 00:34:56,226
Angel.
540
00:34:57,662 --> 00:34:59,323
Pleasure to meet you.
I'm Griff.
541
00:35:03,901 --> 00:35:05,732
You want a homey
to notice your ass?
542
00:35:08,439 --> 00:35:10,407
You gotta work it on OUT.
543
00:35:10,508 --> 00:35:13,739
Yo DJ, pump up the volume!
544
00:35:39,871 --> 00:35:41,168
You know what you got, dawg?
545
00:36:00,391 --> 00:36:01,449
Like what you see, Papi?
546
00:36:02,226 --> 00:36:03,124
Indeed.
547
00:36:10,134 --> 00:36:11,362
I dance at Bodangles.
548
00:36:12,737 --> 00:36:14,295
You want a private lesson...
549
00:36:15,306 --> 00:36:16,102
Holla.
550
00:36:37,328 --> 00:36:38,124
Right on!
551
00:36:44,969 --> 00:36:45,901
Shit!
552
00:36:49,640 --> 00:36:51,835
Maybe this isn't my sport.
553
00:36:51,943 --> 00:36:53,376
You just need few pointers.
554
00:36:53,477 --> 00:36:55,104
Here, stand behind me.
555
00:37:00,318 --> 00:37:03,344
Now feel how I grip my stick.
556
00:37:07,391 --> 00:37:09,359
I could teach you
a thing or two.
557
00:37:09,460 --> 00:37:10,859
Mmm-hmmm.
558
00:39:03,741 --> 00:39:05,174
Big time CUM WHORE!
559
00:39:05,643 --> 00:39:06,940
They're all gonnalaugh at you!
560
00:39:07,745 --> 00:39:09,406
They're all gonnalaugh at you!
561
00:39:32,069 --> 00:39:34,594
White party,
black party, red party,
562
00:39:34,705 --> 00:39:37,640
geez, it all sounds
so sophisticated!
563
00:39:37,742 --> 00:39:40,142
Yeah, I got so high
at the last Blue Ball.
564
00:39:40,244 --> 00:39:42,337
that I woke up with
a glow stick up my ass.
565
00:39:44,148 --> 00:39:45,410
It was blue.
566
00:39:46,250 --> 00:39:49,117
Ya know, we get you outta
those clothes and into the gym,
567
00:39:49,220 --> 00:39:50,744
you'll be
ready to party!
568
00:39:50,855 --> 00:39:53,449
My friends call me
"K," by the way.
569
00:39:53,557 --> 00:39:54,888
Cool.
570
00:39:54,992 --> 00:39:56,289
Is that short for something?
571
00:39:56,394 --> 00:39:57,793
Yeah, K-hole.
572
00:39:57,895 --> 00:39:59,726
But I'm all past that now.
573
00:39:59,830 --> 00:40:01,491
That's probably
for the best.
574
00:40:02,500 --> 00:40:04,764
Yeah, these days
it's all about the "G."
575
00:40:04,869 --> 00:40:06,200
I beg your pardon?
576
00:40:06,303 --> 00:40:07,861
GHB, girlfriend!
577
00:40:10,408 --> 00:40:11,272
Whew!
578
00:40:11,375 --> 00:40:12,307
You know what?
579
00:40:12,410 --> 00:40:14,378
I am an expert at dosing
right up to the limit.
580
00:40:14,478 --> 00:40:16,446
Whaddaya know, there's
a Charles Nelson Reilly...
581
00:40:16,547 --> 00:40:18,674
marathon on the
Game Show Network!
582
00:40:18,783 --> 00:40:21,149
Man, I am WICKED horny!
583
00:41:15,339 --> 00:41:16,169
Are you okay?
584
00:41:19,343 --> 00:41:20,332
Oh my God!
585
00:41:24,348 --> 00:41:26,543
One, two, three, four.
586
00:41:27,585 --> 00:41:29,212
It's not working -
it's not working.
587
00:41:29,320 --> 00:41:30,480
DO something.
588
00:41:33,123 --> 00:41:35,091
What are you DOING?
589
00:41:35,192 --> 00:41:37,023
Give me some of that.
I mean, let me try.
590
00:41:38,362 --> 00:41:39,454
We're not going to
lose another one.
591
00:41:39,563 --> 00:41:40,587
His belt's too tight.
592
00:41:40,698 --> 00:41:41,824
He's not breathing,
he's not breathing.
593
00:41:41,932 --> 00:41:42,864
Get some air in there!
594
00:41:42,967 --> 00:41:44,400
Oh, good Lord - it's
time for defrib.
595
00:41:44,502 --> 00:41:45,526
Lube, lube.
596
00:41:45,636 --> 00:41:46,864
Plan B - LUBE.
597
00:41:50,474 --> 00:41:52,704
Three, two, one - CLEAR!
598
00:41:53,944 --> 00:41:56,071
Three, two, one - CLEAR!
599
00:41:57,014 --> 00:41:59,039
Three, two, one - CLEAR!
600
00:41:59,850 --> 00:42:00,748
Muthafucker!
601
00:42:01,252 --> 00:42:02,742
Holy shit, it worked.
602
00:42:24,041 --> 00:42:24,871
Mom?
603
00:42:26,243 --> 00:42:26,732
Dad?
604
00:42:28,245 --> 00:42:29,507
Anyone home?
605
00:43:41,752 --> 00:43:42,912
Hey, little guy.
606
00:44:17,688 --> 00:44:18,655
Son!
607
00:44:18,756 --> 00:44:20,348
It's not what it looks like!
608
00:44:20,457 --> 00:44:21,446
Andy?!
609
00:44:22,159 --> 00:44:25,060
- Ooohh!
- Ahhhhh!
610
00:44:25,329 --> 00:44:27,058
Don't overreact.I'm sure there's an explanation.
611
00:44:29,266 --> 00:44:30,528
Oh my GOD!
612
00:44:33,837 --> 00:44:35,862
Mommie, I'm so sorry!
613
00:44:35,973 --> 00:44:39,636
I'm not mad at you,
I'm mad at the CRUMBS!
614
00:44:39,743 --> 00:44:42,940
This is not good,
it's not CLEAN!
615
00:45:06,937 --> 00:45:07,460
Mom?
616
00:45:11,442 --> 00:45:12,636
I didn't hear you.
617
00:45:15,679 --> 00:45:16,805
You didn't come home.
618
00:45:19,850 --> 00:45:21,112
What's going on?
619
00:45:24,388 --> 00:45:25,548
I think...
620
00:45:29,259 --> 00:45:30,783
I like guys.
621
00:45:39,369 --> 00:45:40,563
DUH!
622
00:45:42,773 --> 00:45:44,604
What took you so long?
623
00:45:50,180 --> 00:45:53,411
I was sure you led an
"alternative lifestyle"...
624
00:45:53,517 --> 00:45:55,985
the first time you did Madonna.
625
00:45:56,086 --> 00:45:58,748
I mean, cripe, how many three
year-olds can say...
626
00:45:58,856 --> 00:46:02,519
they've performed her entire
"Blonde Ambition" concert?
627
00:46:02,626 --> 00:46:04,617
Oh, "Strike a pose!"
628
00:46:06,096 --> 00:46:07,154
Remember?
629
00:46:08,632 --> 00:46:12,864
Gotta admit though, I did
start to suspect a lot earlier.
630
00:46:12,970 --> 00:46:17,907
Oh, see how you already had
that little "swish" in your step?
631
00:46:18,842 --> 00:46:22,608
Oh yeah, you were always
Mommie's "special boy".
632
00:46:23,747 --> 00:46:25,840
There you are at your
first rock concert.
633
00:46:26,784 --> 00:46:30,550
Carol Channing was
on fire that night!
634
00:46:30,654 --> 00:46:33,680
Oh, and that's the time you
dressed up like Karen Black...
635
00:46:33,791 --> 00:46:36,783
in Airport '75 when
we flew to Florida.
636
00:46:37,694 --> 00:46:40,060
"There's nobody
flying the plane!"
637
00:46:40,164 --> 00:46:41,927
Okay, okay!
I get it!
638
00:47:09,293 --> 00:47:11,523
Come on, get in!
639
00:47:12,563 --> 00:47:13,655
GET WET!
640
00:47:14,965 --> 00:47:16,557
I'm getting a start
on my summer reading.
641
00:47:17,968 --> 00:47:19,094
Hey, cut it out!
642
00:47:30,180 --> 00:47:31,442
No, Jarod!
643
00:47:31,548 --> 00:47:32,708
No!
644
00:47:32,816 --> 00:47:34,943
You know I pinned
you yesterday.
645
00:47:35,052 --> 00:47:35,882
No!
646
00:48:04,314 --> 00:48:06,214
Wo-ow.
647
00:48:07,217 --> 00:48:08,445
Look at those.
648
00:48:09,786 --> 00:48:10,718
What?
649
00:48:10,821 --> 00:48:12,083
Oh my God.
650
00:48:20,197 --> 00:48:21,562
I think I'm gonna fuck Beau.
651
00:48:23,734 --> 00:48:25,099
That's excellent.
652
00:48:25,202 --> 00:48:26,100
Yeah.
653
00:48:27,471 --> 00:48:29,063
We've been gettin'
really close.
654
00:48:30,307 --> 00:48:33,140
Almost did it the other day,
but... I stopped.
655
00:48:34,845 --> 00:48:35,709
How come?
656
00:48:36,713 --> 00:48:37,737
I don't know.
657
00:48:39,149 --> 00:48:40,309
I'm scared, Griff.
658
00:48:41,585 --> 00:48:43,143
What if I'm not ready?
659
00:48:46,390 --> 00:48:50,451
Well, the way I see it...
if you really like him,
660
00:48:50,560 --> 00:48:55,395
and you trust him...
then I say, go for it.
661
00:48:58,335 --> 00:49:00,997
No one understands
me like you do, Griffin.
662
00:49:01,104 --> 00:49:02,969
You're the best.
663
00:49:05,642 --> 00:49:06,734
Yeah.
664
00:49:16,086 --> 00:49:17,075
Oh, yeah.
665
00:49:17,187 --> 00:49:18,085
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
666
00:49:26,029 --> 00:49:27,018
Totally!
667
00:49:45,949 --> 00:49:47,177
BDSM?
668
00:49:50,921 --> 00:49:53,321
Of course.
669
00:50:09,306 --> 00:50:10,273
Oh yeah!
670
00:50:12,209 --> 00:50:17,340
Um... delicious.
671
00:50:22,019 --> 00:50:23,919
Oh yeah!
672
00:50:42,906 --> 00:50:44,635
What is the emergency?
673
00:50:44,741 --> 00:50:46,333
Griff finally tapped into
the security system...
674
00:50:46,443 --> 00:50:47,933
in the locker room.
675
00:50:48,045 --> 00:50:50,570
Straight boy's
about to get naked.
676
00:50:51,782 --> 00:50:52,908
Get the fuck out of here, man.
677
00:50:54,851 --> 00:50:56,546
Place your bets,
Gentleman.
678
00:50:56,653 --> 00:50:58,211
Ten bucks he's a show-er!
679
00:50:59,990 --> 00:51:02,049
Baby's got BACK!
680
00:51:02,159 --> 00:51:03,251
Dude, turn around.
681
00:51:03,360 --> 00:51:04,384
Deliver the package!
682
00:51:06,096 --> 00:51:07,654
You guys are ill,
you know that?
683
00:51:07,764 --> 00:51:08,856
How so?
684
00:51:08,965 --> 00:51:11,900
Look at yourselves, lusting
after the straight guy...
685
00:51:12,002 --> 00:51:13,970
you can never have.
686
00:51:14,071 --> 00:51:15,333
Aren't we beyond that?
687
00:51:15,439 --> 00:51:16,929
It's so '90's.
688
00:51:18,508 --> 00:51:19,406
He dropped the soap!
689
00:51:21,678 --> 00:51:22,940
This is so wrong.
690
00:51:25,682 --> 00:51:26,671
We have bush.
691
00:51:27,150 --> 00:51:29,243
Repeat, we have bush.
692
00:51:31,721 --> 00:51:32,745
Oh... my.
693
00:51:34,558 --> 00:51:36,458
Can you zoom in on that?
694
00:51:36,560 --> 00:51:38,084
Yes, indeed.
695
00:51:41,531 --> 00:51:43,328
Our boy's a show-er!
696
00:51:43,433 --> 00:51:45,958
Is he doing what I
think he's doing?
697
00:51:48,071 --> 00:51:50,437
He's fingering himself!
698
00:51:53,310 --> 00:51:56,211
He is a show-er AND a grower.
699
00:51:56,313 --> 00:51:58,781
Abercrombie & BITCH!
700
00:51:58,882 --> 00:52:01,282
Where the heck is Andy?!
701
00:52:12,329 --> 00:52:13,261
Andy?
702
00:52:13,363 --> 00:52:14,762
Can I still come in?
703
00:52:16,333 --> 00:52:17,231
Rodzilla?
704
00:52:22,639 --> 00:52:23,731
Oh, what the hell.
705
00:52:30,947 --> 00:52:34,542
So, I take it you have
utmost experience?
706
00:52:34,651 --> 00:52:36,346
In "the scene?"
707
00:52:36,453 --> 00:52:37,784
Oh yeah.
708
00:52:37,888 --> 00:52:39,651
I'm an old pro.
709
00:52:42,058 --> 00:52:43,218
Cool hammock.
710
00:52:43,326 --> 00:52:45,556
Right.
711
00:52:49,232 --> 00:52:51,666
I use bicycle horn instead
of the safety-words.
712
00:52:53,170 --> 00:52:58,198
Excuse me while I go to slip into
something more comFORTable.
713
00:52:58,308 --> 00:52:59,275
Right on!
714
00:53:01,645 --> 00:53:03,738
What are you wearing?
715
00:53:03,847 --> 00:53:07,681
You mentioned water sports...
in case we wanted to take a dip.
716
00:53:09,452 --> 00:53:11,920
Marco... polo.
717
00:53:38,014 --> 00:53:38,708
C'mon!
718
00:53:38,815 --> 00:53:40,874
Go back to
lick-my-hairy-cherry.com!
719
00:53:40,984 --> 00:53:42,178
Holy shit.
720
00:53:47,424 --> 00:53:48,982
What the fuck?!
721
00:53:55,432 --> 00:53:57,730
There's a website where you
can tell the master...
722
00:53:57,834 --> 00:53:59,358
what you want
to do to the slave...
723
00:53:59,469 --> 00:54:04,099
Go to
rodzillas-interactive-dungeon.org.
724
00:54:04,207 --> 00:54:05,435
We're busy, Muff-ster.
725
00:54:05,542 --> 00:54:07,476
Yeah, sorry to break up
your little circle-jerk,
726
00:54:07,577 --> 00:54:09,477
but that's an ORDER!
727
00:54:13,950 --> 00:54:15,884
Hey, put that back!
728
00:54:18,321 --> 00:54:21,984
Oh... my... God.
729
00:54:46,983 --> 00:54:48,473
Rodzilla!
730
00:54:57,260 --> 00:54:58,693
Mr. Puckov!
731
00:54:59,696 --> 00:55:01,561
This is for my
Muslim comrades.
732
00:55:01,665 --> 00:55:03,155
Imperialist American SVINE!
733
00:55:03,266 --> 00:55:04,324
Ah, NO!
734
00:55:07,437 --> 00:55:10,600
Your "ugly American" scene
is driving me insane.
735
00:55:10,707 --> 00:55:13,835
Have another cheeseburger,
capitalist animal!
736
00:55:13,943 --> 00:55:15,501
OUCH!
737
00:55:15,612 --> 00:55:17,170
Oh my goodness.
738
00:55:17,280 --> 00:55:18,679
This is for Kathie Lee.
739
00:55:18,782 --> 00:55:20,374
Kelly Ripa, she sucks!
740
00:55:20,483 --> 00:55:24,544
Oh, go on, type
something in!
741
00:55:27,357 --> 00:55:30,383
Teach him a lesson!
742
00:55:31,728 --> 00:55:33,423
Okay, I'm serious,
that's enough.
743
00:55:35,131 --> 00:55:36,792
Could we just talk this out?
744
00:55:37,967 --> 00:55:39,491
Look, he hears us!
745
00:55:43,206 --> 00:55:44,639
Ahhhh!
746
00:55:44,741 --> 00:55:47,539
Supersize THIS,
mother-fucker!
747
00:55:48,278 --> 00:55:51,611
No. No. No. No. No...
748
00:55:51,715 --> 00:55:55,845
Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes.
749
00:55:55,952 --> 00:56:03,882
Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. YES.
750
00:56:03,993 --> 00:56:05,551
Holy shit!
751
00:56:05,662 --> 00:56:08,324
FIST HIS ASS!
752
00:56:10,367 --> 00:56:11,493
What's with the Cwisco?
753
00:56:15,338 --> 00:56:16,965
This might take the edge off.
754
00:56:23,580 --> 00:56:24,444
Ewwww!
755
00:56:30,120 --> 00:56:33,453
Okay, Mr. Puckov?
756
00:56:33,556 --> 00:56:35,387
You like my table?
757
00:56:35,492 --> 00:56:38,017
My GLASS table?
758
00:56:42,599 --> 00:56:43,964
What's he doing?
759
00:56:49,072 --> 00:56:51,768
This one's out of my
jurisdiction, kid.
760
00:56:55,044 --> 00:56:56,534
Am I supposed
to do something?
761
00:56:58,281 --> 00:57:00,442
Ooooo, I love how
you play so dumb.
762
00:57:01,084 --> 00:57:04,485
Just close your eyes,
relax, and enjoy...
763
00:57:09,459 --> 00:57:15,295
Rodzilla loves
Belgian chocolate...
764
00:57:35,952 --> 00:57:36,884
You know?
765
00:57:36,986 --> 00:57:40,251
Maybe this sex thing is just
not all it's cracked up to be.
766
00:57:41,057 --> 00:57:44,049
Maybe I should just hang
it up and become a Priest.
767
00:57:44,160 --> 00:57:46,856
Then you could finally
get laid, Sister Mary.
768
00:57:50,667 --> 00:57:54,433
Look, love is a
battlefield, kid.
769
00:57:55,038 --> 00:57:59,372
If at first we don't succeed,
you just try again.
770
00:57:59,476 --> 00:58:01,444
Yeah, but we're
running out of time.
771
00:58:01,544 --> 00:58:02,943
Summer's almost over!
772
00:58:03,046 --> 00:58:07,107
OK, who has a hot
prospect for the weekend?
773
00:58:08,785 --> 00:58:09,979
I do!
774
00:58:12,655 --> 00:58:13,314
Okay.
775
00:58:13,790 --> 00:58:18,989
International gay
superstar Richard Hatch...
776
00:58:19,095 --> 00:58:21,586
is coming to town
to sign his new book.
777
00:58:21,698 --> 00:58:25,190
So, I figured I'd go for it,
cause God knows...
778
00:58:25,301 --> 00:58:28,464
no one else around here
appreciates me.
779
00:58:28,571 --> 00:58:29,902
Rock on!
780
00:58:33,343 --> 00:58:34,640
What about you, Griff?
781
00:58:34,744 --> 00:58:36,336
Nada.
782
00:58:36,446 --> 00:58:38,539
Maybe the two of us
can check Bodangles.
783
00:58:38,648 --> 00:58:39,945
Yeah, sure.
784
00:58:40,049 --> 00:58:40,640
Cool.
785
00:58:42,252 --> 00:58:43,947
Hey kids, how's it hangin'?
786
00:58:45,855 --> 00:58:47,322
Dad, what are you wearing?
787
00:58:47,790 --> 00:58:50,816
Oh yeah, the old
man's "got it goin' on!"
788
00:58:50,927 --> 00:58:52,019
See ya at sea.
789
00:59:15,184 --> 00:59:16,481
Oh my goodness.
790
00:59:22,592 --> 00:59:25,356
It is such an honor
to meet you...
791
00:59:27,764 --> 00:59:29,561
without digital censorship.
792
00:59:32,702 --> 00:59:34,226
And who should I
make this out to?
793
00:59:37,640 --> 00:59:41,736
Mr. Ben Dover.
794
00:59:43,279 --> 00:59:44,644
Oh you beast.
795
01:00:28,958 --> 01:00:29,947
Hello.
796
01:00:30,059 --> 01:00:30,718
Hi.
797
01:00:35,999 --> 01:00:36,966
Nice ass, man.
798
01:00:38,001 --> 01:00:38,797
How are ya?
799
01:00:50,213 --> 01:00:50,907
Hey.
800
01:00:53,783 --> 01:00:54,807
Good day, gents.
801
01:00:58,888 --> 01:01:01,755
Damn, I'd tap that ass.It's so tight.
802
01:01:18,975 --> 01:01:20,169
Hi.
803
01:01:20,276 --> 01:01:21,766
Hey, Griff.
804
01:01:21,878 --> 01:01:23,812
Griff, hey.
805
01:01:23,913 --> 01:01:25,380
Jarod's has mentioned you.
806
01:01:25,481 --> 01:01:27,415
Cool.
807
01:01:27,517 --> 01:01:29,678
May I speak to
you for a minute?
808
01:01:29,786 --> 01:01:31,014
Sure thing.
809
01:01:34,223 --> 01:01:35,656
Alone.
810
01:01:38,528 --> 01:01:39,495
Be right back.
811
01:01:47,437 --> 01:01:49,132
What's goin' on?
812
01:01:49,238 --> 01:01:50,830
I thought it was going
to be just you and me.
813
01:01:53,009 --> 01:01:54,442
Is there a problem?
814
01:01:54,544 --> 01:01:55,875
Summer's almost over, J.
815
01:01:58,081 --> 01:01:59,571
Once we go off to college...
816
01:02:02,585 --> 01:02:03,574
Wait.
817
01:02:04,053 --> 01:02:05,680
Are you jealous?
818
01:02:08,024 --> 01:02:08,991
Fuck off.
819
01:02:14,630 --> 01:02:15,562
Everything okay?
820
01:02:20,269 --> 01:02:21,065
Yeah.
821
01:02:22,071 --> 01:02:22,935
Forget it.
822
01:02:26,642 --> 01:02:27,370
Griff.
823
01:02:29,679 --> 01:02:30,976
Rainbow Video,
Andy speaking.
824
01:02:31,647 --> 01:02:35,105
You are not gonna believe
who is in my room right now.
825
01:02:35,218 --> 01:02:36,207
Who?
826
01:02:36,319 --> 01:02:37,786
Richard Hatch!
827
01:02:37,887 --> 01:02:39,377
And I think he
wants to fuck me.
828
01:02:40,189 --> 01:02:44,057
I'm about to get anal froma million dollar bear!
829
01:02:44,160 --> 01:02:46,720
Are you like... prepared?
830
01:02:46,829 --> 01:02:47,727
Oh yeah.
831
01:02:49,232 --> 01:02:50,859
I'm all set.
832
01:02:50,967 --> 01:02:52,457
Gotta run, kid.
833
01:02:52,568 --> 01:02:54,433
Boy Nico is about
to become a man.
834
01:03:03,813 --> 01:03:05,246
Better safe than sorry.
835
01:03:36,646 --> 01:03:37,374
Woe.
836
01:03:59,368 --> 01:04:00,198
Woof.
837
01:04:07,343 --> 01:04:08,207
That's hot.
838
01:04:16,219 --> 01:04:18,016
Daddy likes it.
839
01:04:41,010 --> 01:04:42,875
I forgot my car keys.
840
01:04:46,782 --> 01:04:48,272
Oh, no, no, no, no!
I just...
841
01:04:48,384 --> 01:04:50,079
What's this?
842
01:04:50,186 --> 01:04:52,086
It's a plantain.
843
01:04:53,589 --> 01:04:58,288
Okay, doll, love you,
call you, drive safe!
844
01:05:00,429 --> 01:05:01,794
Maybe this wasn't
such a great idea.
845
01:05:18,681 --> 01:05:19,773
Are you alright?
846
01:05:21,250 --> 01:05:22,114
I'm fine.
847
01:05:28,391 --> 01:05:30,985
Can you excuse me
for one moment?
848
01:06:10,533 --> 01:06:11,557
Mmmm, yeah.
849
01:06:14,370 --> 01:06:15,394
How old are you?
850
01:06:17,740 --> 01:06:18,934
Seventeen.
851
01:06:20,843 --> 01:06:22,105
Sorry, kid.
852
01:06:22,211 --> 01:06:24,679
WAY past your prime.
853
01:06:43,599 --> 01:06:45,931
Hey Mr. DJ, gimme a BEAT!
854
01:07:12,528 --> 01:07:13,790
Whoa!
855
01:07:24,440 --> 01:07:27,307
Damn boy, you workin'
that shit OUT!
856
01:07:37,286 --> 01:07:38,776
Taught him everything
he know, yo!
857
01:07:45,561 --> 01:07:49,156
Bubble-butt, bubble-butt,
bubble-butt, bubble-butt!
858
01:07:49,265 --> 01:07:53,201
Bubble-butt, bubble-butt,
bubble-butt, bubble-butt!
859
01:07:53,302 --> 01:07:57,136
Bubble-butt, bubble-butt,
bubble-butt, bubble-butt!
860
01:07:57,240 --> 01:08:00,971
Bubble-butt, bubble-butt,
bubble-butt, bubble-butt!
861
01:08:31,641 --> 01:08:32,733
They're all gonnalaugh at you!
862
01:08:33,409 --> 01:08:34,569
They're all gonnalaugh at you!
863
01:08:45,721 --> 01:08:49,054
- Rainbow Vid...
- I'm about to explode!
864
01:08:49,158 --> 01:08:50,887
Did you take the enema?
865
01:08:50,993 --> 01:08:54,190
Yeah, three of them.
866
01:08:54,297 --> 01:08:55,696
Oh my God!
867
01:09:19,422 --> 01:09:20,286
Fuck this shit.
868
01:09:22,925 --> 01:09:25,155
Hey, Andy.
Who's calling?
869
01:09:25,261 --> 01:09:26,057
Ahhh... it's a wrong number.
870
01:09:32,301 --> 01:09:33,461
Oh my goodness.
871
01:09:39,876 --> 01:09:40,900
Richard?
872
01:09:57,059 --> 01:09:59,289
Your ass tastes so good.
873
01:10:07,770 --> 01:10:09,704
Looks like Little Jarod
likes it too.
874
01:10:10,373 --> 01:10:11,931
Little... Jarod?
875
01:10:20,216 --> 01:10:21,376
I've waited forever.
876
01:10:26,956 --> 01:10:28,446
Dammit!
I fuckin' suck!
877
01:10:31,494 --> 01:10:33,121
It's okay.
878
01:10:33,229 --> 01:10:34,389
I'll get him back up again.
879
01:10:38,501 --> 01:10:41,231
I'm sorry, it's not you.
880
01:10:42,505 --> 01:10:43,403
But...
881
01:10:48,244 --> 01:10:49,541
Can we try another time?
882
01:10:53,716 --> 01:10:56,617
Please... please, stop!
883
01:11:01,457 --> 01:11:02,481
Just take me home?
884
01:11:07,430 --> 01:11:08,124
Fine.
885
01:11:39,228 --> 01:11:39,785
Jesus!
886
01:12:18,300 --> 01:12:19,164
My eye!
887
01:12:23,139 --> 01:12:23,867
Dad?
888
01:12:40,356 --> 01:12:42,187
- Dad?
- Yep?
889
01:12:42,291 --> 01:12:44,088
Can I ask you a question?
890
01:12:44,193 --> 01:12:45,956
Certainly, son.
891
01:12:46,062 --> 01:12:50,522
How did you know when you
were ready to have sex?
892
01:12:50,633 --> 01:12:51,463
Oh.
893
01:12:52,601 --> 01:12:55,434
Uh, well...
894
01:12:55,538 --> 01:12:58,336
Unfortunately, my Uncle Earl
made that decision FOR me.
895
01:12:59,942 --> 01:13:03,036
But only you can make
that decision, Andy.
896
01:13:03,145 --> 01:13:04,442
Do you think you're ready?
897
01:13:05,548 --> 01:13:06,173
Yeah.
898
01:13:06,282 --> 01:13:08,307
I mean, a big
part of me does.
899
01:13:08,417 --> 01:13:11,978
But, I'm petrified
from the neck up.
900
01:13:13,522 --> 01:13:14,819
Sounds like you
have your answer.
901
01:13:16,225 --> 01:13:16,850
Yeah?
902
01:13:16,959 --> 01:13:17,857
Yeah, yeah.
903
01:13:17,960 --> 01:13:18,949
Yeah.
904
01:13:20,663 --> 01:13:24,360
I think I should hold on
to my cherry for awhile.
905
01:13:25,301 --> 01:13:26,165
Good boy.
906
01:13:27,503 --> 01:13:32,839
Um, ah... I have
something to tell you.
907
01:13:34,510 --> 01:13:35,670
Okay.
908
01:13:37,880 --> 01:13:39,245
Daddy's a bi-sexshul.
909
01:13:40,349 --> 01:13:41,475
And it's all because of you.
910
01:13:43,552 --> 01:13:44,678
Gee, thanks, Dad.
911
01:13:44,787 --> 01:13:50,453
No, what I mean is... you gave
me the courage to be "me."
912
01:13:51,627 --> 01:13:55,461
But, now Andy, I think
you're not gonna love me anymore.
913
01:13:55,564 --> 01:13:56,121
Dad...
914
01:13:56,232 --> 01:13:57,164
Well, that's what I think.
915
01:13:57,933 --> 01:13:59,230
I'm afraid.
916
01:13:59,335 --> 01:14:00,768
Oh, Dad, Dad, Dad.
917
01:14:00,870 --> 01:14:02,428
Hey, hey, hey.
918
01:14:02,538 --> 01:14:03,698
You're still the same person.
919
01:14:03,806 --> 01:14:04,431
I'm still...
920
01:14:04,540 --> 01:14:05,234
You're still the
same person...
921
01:14:05,341 --> 01:14:06,000
Still the same?
922
01:14:06,108 --> 01:14:06,836
And I will always love you.
923
01:14:06,942 --> 01:14:07,636
Always?
924
01:14:07,743 --> 01:14:08,767
- I will always...
- You, alw...
925
01:14:08,878 --> 01:14:10,004
- I will always...
- Alw...
926
01:14:10,112 --> 01:14:11,443
- I will always...
- Al...
927
01:14:11,547 --> 01:14:12,605
- I will always...
- Al...
928
01:14:12,715 --> 01:14:14,649
I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU!
Dad!
929
01:14:14,750 --> 01:14:15,717
You will always love ME?
930
01:14:17,586 --> 01:14:19,577
Oh, Andy.
931
01:14:23,492 --> 01:14:24,686
I will always love you.
932
01:14:24,794 --> 01:14:26,261
Now, stop.
933
01:14:28,998 --> 01:14:30,158
I gotta go, kid.
934
01:14:53,789 --> 01:14:56,087
I cannot believe I almost
sucked my Dad's dick.
935
01:14:57,693 --> 01:15:00,127
Desperate times call for
desperate measures, kid.
936
01:15:01,397 --> 01:15:02,728
Maybe you should've done him.
937
01:15:04,633 --> 01:15:08,399
I cannot believe a Survivor
Winner heard me take a dump.
938
01:15:09,305 --> 01:15:11,671
Suck it up, Girls.
939
01:15:11,774 --> 01:15:14,402
Looks like my Labor Day
soir๏ฟฝe is gonna be...
940
01:15:14,510 --> 01:15:17,877
your last chance to snag
a slice of the butt-pie.
941
01:15:18,647 --> 01:15:22,139
Sex, sex, sex, that's all
we're ever talking about!
942
01:15:22,251 --> 01:15:23,616
What's so good
about it anyway?
943
01:15:23,719 --> 01:15:25,584
I've had much more luck
with my right hand
944
01:15:25,688 --> 01:15:27,280
and my left index finger.
945
01:15:29,525 --> 01:15:32,323
I can't believe you wanna
screw that sketchy go-go boy.
946
01:15:32,428 --> 01:15:34,419
At least he's not
a brain-dead jock.
947
01:15:34,530 --> 01:15:37,055
Sorry we can't all
be studs like you!
948
01:15:37,166 --> 01:15:38,292
Guess what?
949
01:15:40,769 --> 01:15:42,396
Tyler was the first guy
I've ever been with.
950
01:15:44,707 --> 01:15:46,072
I was so nervous I
couldn't even get it up.
951
01:15:46,175 --> 01:15:50,475
Now Beau wants me to top him at
the party and I'm scared to death.
952
01:15:53,349 --> 01:15:54,475
Some STUD, huh?
953
01:15:56,719 --> 01:15:58,778
Well, aren't we
getting testy?
954
01:16:00,656 --> 01:16:05,719
Hey, hey, who told you
guys this was gonna be easy?
955
01:16:05,828 --> 01:16:07,921
Sex can be messy, kids.
956
01:16:08,030 --> 01:16:11,124
Full of penis drippings,
and ill-timed queafage...
957
01:16:11,233 --> 01:16:13,701
and thirty-one flavors
of genital cheese.
958
01:16:13,802 --> 01:16:15,565
What the FUUUUUCK!
959
01:16:18,741 --> 01:16:21,141
He heard me take
a fart, Dawn.
960
01:16:22,478 --> 01:16:24,309
Okay, fine.
961
01:16:26,382 --> 01:16:28,145
You still don't
get it, do you?
962
01:16:29,652 --> 01:16:31,517
Even after all
you've been through.
963
01:16:33,122 --> 01:16:37,957
I was a stud long before
I ever licked a pussy.
964
01:16:38,060 --> 01:16:40,290
Oh, great, a bull dyke's
gonna instruct us...
965
01:16:40,396 --> 01:16:41,829
on the art of being men!
966
01:16:41,931 --> 01:16:43,990
Damn right, bitch!
967
01:16:45,200 --> 01:16:51,002
When you boys learn that having sex
doesn't make you a man...
968
01:16:53,642 --> 01:16:58,204
maybe you'll finally pull
your pricks outta your poopshoots.
969
01:17:01,984 --> 01:17:03,679
Crimony, kids.
970
01:17:03,786 --> 01:17:06,516
I sure do hope you
get some ass-play.
971
01:17:26,809 --> 01:17:27,741
You're sure, right?
972
01:17:29,278 --> 01:17:30,040
Yeah.
973
01:17:31,380 --> 01:17:32,472
I want you to top me.
974
01:17:33,582 --> 01:17:35,743
You guys are gonna
BUTT-FUCK, aren't you?
975
01:17:35,851 --> 01:17:37,045
Butt-fuckers!
976
01:17:37,152 --> 01:17:38,176
Butt-fuckers!
977
01:17:38,287 --> 01:17:39,686
Butt-fuckers!
978
01:17:40,823 --> 01:17:43,758
Mini-Muff, get the
fuck out of here!
979
01:17:43,859 --> 01:17:46,293
C'mon, I wanna watch!
980
01:17:46,395 --> 01:17:48,192
NOW, Mini!
981
01:17:48,297 --> 01:17:49,127
Awww, man.
982
01:17:52,234 --> 01:17:53,496
I may need this.
983
01:17:53,602 --> 01:17:55,160
Dude, don't be
a dick-burglar.
984
01:18:17,326 --> 01:18:19,351
I'm glad you called
me back, Papi.
985
01:18:19,461 --> 01:18:23,056
You know, I likes you
just the way you are.
986
01:19:22,524 --> 01:19:25,186
Silver foxy...
987
01:19:27,429 --> 01:19:29,056
You're Muffler's grandfather.
988
01:19:30,332 --> 01:19:32,027
I've been accused of that.
989
01:19:32,134 --> 01:19:34,728
And you are...?
990
01:19:36,171 --> 01:19:37,832
Nico.
991
01:19:37,940 --> 01:19:39,532
I'm Dawn's friend.
992
01:19:41,677 --> 01:19:43,611
Enjoying yourself, Nico?
993
01:19:45,047 --> 01:19:47,242
I'm startin' to feel
pretty darn happy.
994
01:19:50,953 --> 01:19:52,147
Is that so?
995
01:19:53,288 --> 01:19:57,782
And where is your
date this evening?
996
01:19:58,594 --> 01:20:01,995
You're lookin' at one
stag fag, Herr Muffler.
997
01:20:03,866 --> 01:20:05,561
Can I trouble you
for a highball?
998
01:20:06,835 --> 01:20:09,167
I've had my fill
of this swill.
999
01:20:10,305 --> 01:20:12,796
I'm afraid I'm gonna have
to see some proper I.D.
1000
01:20:16,211 --> 01:20:18,907
You have any good tequila?
1001
01:20:19,014 --> 01:20:20,447
Anejo?
1002
01:20:23,118 --> 01:20:24,813
Mmmmhmmm.
1003
01:20:25,454 --> 01:20:28,116
Aged eighteen years...
1004
01:20:28,223 --> 01:20:30,851
Just the way
Grandpa likes it.
1005
01:20:56,084 --> 01:20:57,016
What is it, Papi?
1006
01:21:06,795 --> 01:21:07,955
You're feelin' your boy, huh?
1007
01:21:09,531 --> 01:21:10,498
I'm sorry, Angel.
1008
01:21:11,099 --> 01:21:12,430
It's all good, kid.
No sweat.
1009
01:21:14,269 --> 01:21:14,963
Use what you got.
1010
01:21:16,338 --> 01:21:17,362
And hurry.
1011
01:21:25,981 --> 01:21:27,073
- Wait!
- Shit!
1012
01:21:28,083 --> 01:21:29,050
Griff?
1013
01:21:29,151 --> 01:21:31,984
- I need to talk.
- I'm kinda busy, dude.
1014
01:21:32,087 --> 01:21:33,145
It's an emergency.
1015
01:21:38,026 --> 01:21:39,755
Can you hold that thought?
1016
01:21:39,861 --> 01:21:41,852
You gotta be
fuckin' kidding me.
1017
01:21:50,772 --> 01:21:52,706
This better be
fucking good, Griff.
1018
01:21:52,808 --> 01:21:54,708
I had to tell you
before it was too late.
1019
01:21:58,413 --> 01:21:59,937
I love you, Jarod.
1020
01:22:03,051 --> 01:22:04,075
I'm in love with you.
1021
01:22:07,956 --> 01:22:08,923
For a long time.
1022
01:22:12,628 --> 01:22:13,595
I don't know what to say.
1023
01:22:14,463 --> 01:22:15,657
You don't have
to say anything.
1024
01:22:15,764 --> 01:22:18,392
I just had to let you know.
1025
01:22:23,272 --> 01:22:24,762
We gonna fuck, or what?
1026
01:22:24,873 --> 01:22:26,170
Cause my balls
are turning blue.
1027
01:22:29,911 --> 01:22:30,878
I'm sorry, Beau.
1028
01:22:32,281 --> 01:22:33,373
I didn't know...
1029
01:22:35,617 --> 01:22:36,879
I had a boyfriend.
1030
01:23:25,834 --> 01:23:27,859
Yeah... yeah... yeah.
1031
01:23:40,215 --> 01:23:42,547
And how Bette Davis
didn't win the Oscar...
1032
01:23:42,651 --> 01:23:46,280
for All About Eve is one of
the mortal sins of Hollywood!
1033
01:23:55,697 --> 01:23:58,723
If I told you you are
worldly, polished,
1034
01:23:58,834 --> 01:24:04,101
and sophisticated, would
you hold it against me?
1035
01:24:04,206 --> 01:24:09,439
My dear young boy, are
you trying to seduce me?
1036
01:24:11,279 --> 01:24:13,440
I don't know.
1037
01:24:13,548 --> 01:24:14,572
Am I?
1038
01:24:23,825 --> 01:24:28,694
Fasten your seatbelt, sonny
It's going to be a bumpy night.
1039
01:24:39,674 --> 01:24:40,504
So. where's Jarod?
1040
01:24:42,077 --> 01:24:42,771
He dumped me.
1041
01:24:49,050 --> 01:24:49,982
Where's Griff?
1042
01:24:51,286 --> 01:24:53,151
Papi kicked me
to the curb, yo.
1043
01:25:06,501 --> 01:25:07,900
Oh, wow.
1044
01:25:08,003 --> 01:25:09,163
Wow.
1045
01:25:09,271 --> 01:25:11,466
Okay!
1046
01:25:11,573 --> 01:25:13,234
Oh, yeah.
1047
01:25:24,519 --> 01:25:28,421
So. um... well.
1048
01:25:36,832 --> 01:25:37,526
Wow.
1049
01:25:40,035 --> 01:25:42,196
So where are you guys from?
1050
01:25:45,474 --> 01:25:46,133
Okay.
1051
01:25:47,742 --> 01:25:49,039
Awww!
1052
01:25:49,144 --> 01:25:49,803
OH!
1053
01:25:53,181 --> 01:25:53,943
Aaahhh!
1054
01:25:56,585 --> 01:25:57,552
Grandpa Muffler!
1055
01:25:57,652 --> 01:26:00,382
Oh Nico, heavens to Betsy!
1056
01:26:00,489 --> 01:26:02,616
Tap Grandpa's ass!
1057
01:26:03,792 --> 01:26:05,259
Oh, that's good.
1058
01:26:13,401 --> 01:26:15,835
Yo, you got
room for one more?
1059
01:26:16,671 --> 01:26:18,263
Ho!
1060
01:26:26,181 --> 01:26:30,174
There's a special place
inside me that you have FOUND!
1061
01:26:30,285 --> 01:26:31,616
My God help me!
1062
01:26:32,854 --> 01:26:36,119
Oh, "Queer as Folk", eat
your fuckin' heart out!
1063
01:27:12,694 --> 01:27:13,456
Good morning.
1064
01:27:15,564 --> 01:27:16,496
Thank God.
1065
01:27:18,533 --> 01:27:19,625
What?
1066
01:27:22,938 --> 01:27:23,996
I wasn't dreaming.
1067
01:27:41,856 --> 01:27:42,982
Morning, Beau.
1068
01:27:45,327 --> 01:27:46,294
Angel.
1069
01:28:14,856 --> 01:28:16,448
And the moral of
the story is...
1070
01:28:16,558 --> 01:28:19,721
real men take it up the ass!
1071
01:28:23,465 --> 01:28:27,526
And the best butt-love...
is when you're really in love.
1072
01:28:30,905 --> 01:28:32,668
Don't look so blue.
1073
01:28:32,774 --> 01:28:35,072
We're gonna find
husbands someday.
1074
01:28:35,176 --> 01:28:36,165
I know.
1075
01:28:37,445 --> 01:28:39,037
It's just that...
summer's over.
1076
01:28:40,615 --> 01:28:41,877
We're not kids anymore.
1077
01:28:44,786 --> 01:28:47,050
I'm really gonna
miss you guys.
1078
01:28:47,155 --> 01:28:48,952
What the fuck!
1079
01:28:49,057 --> 01:28:50,524
You KNOW we're doin'
Spring Break...
1080
01:28:50,625 --> 01:28:52,616
in Ft. Lauderdale, bitch!
1081
01:28:54,562 --> 01:28:55,586
To the sequel.
1082
01:28:56,564 --> 01:28:58,156
To the sequel!
1083
01:29:56,057 --> 01:29:57,388
Would you like to dance?
1084
01:29:57,492 --> 01:29:59,187
I thought you'd never ask.
1085
01:30:13,208 --> 01:30:14,072
My lady.
1086
01:30:25,386 --> 01:30:26,910
Awwwww.
1087
01:30:39,601 --> 01:30:41,432
Hiya, kids.
1088
01:30:41,536 --> 01:30:43,003
Hi, Mrs. Hunter.
1089
01:30:44,706 --> 01:30:45,638
Muffler.
1090
01:30:47,709 --> 01:30:50,701
Oh... Mrs. Hunter.
1091
01:30:53,248 --> 01:30:54,180
Wow.
1092
01:31:02,423 --> 01:31:04,755
Okay, okay, we gotta know.
1093
01:31:05,226 --> 01:31:05,988
Muffler...
1094
01:31:07,962 --> 01:31:09,293
What's your secret?
1095
01:31:17,205 --> 01:31:18,866
Arghhhhrghhhhhh.
1096
01:31:19,305 --> 01:31:25,224
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