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1
00:01:28,735 --> 00:01:30,430
Aw!
2
00:01:43,483 --> 00:01:47,180
- Hey, what's going on?
- What are you doing in my car?
3
00:01:47,254 --> 00:01:49,688
Shit!
Where are we going?
4
00:01:49,756 --> 00:01:52,020
- How did you get in my car?
- What?
5
00:01:52,092 --> 00:01:54,458
You said I could sleep here.
6
00:01:54,528 --> 00:01:57,053
- You said it was comfortable too.
- No!
7
00:01:57,130 --> 00:01:59,496
- You didn't say that?
- No. Get out.
8
00:01:59,566 --> 00:02:03,366
- This is crap. Come on!
- Get out. I'm late.
9
00:02:03,437 --> 00:02:06,270
Man: Stop pulling.
You're hurting me.
10
00:02:06,339 --> 00:02:08,637
You know what you could do?
Eat it!
11
00:02:08,708 --> 00:02:10,938
- You lied, man.
- Yeah, yeah.
12
00:02:11,011 --> 00:02:13,275
- That's great.
- F you, pal.
13
00:02:13,346 --> 00:02:15,837
F you, buddy!
14
00:02:34,334 --> 00:02:35,961
Hey! Hey!
15
00:02:36,036 --> 00:02:38,061
I'm looking
for Cheerful Place.
16
00:02:42,476 --> 00:02:45,070
- What are you looking for?
- Cheerful Place.
17
00:02:45,145 --> 00:02:46,635
Isn't it right there?
18
00:02:51,518 --> 00:02:52,780
Jesus, no.
19
00:02:52,853 --> 00:02:55,151
Christ Almighty.
20
00:02:55,222 --> 00:02:56,484
Oh, fuck.
21
00:03:11,805 --> 00:03:15,468
Don't worry, kids.
Flappy's here!
22
00:03:17,611 --> 00:03:19,943
Hurry up,
we're gonna miss it.
23
00:03:20,013 --> 00:03:21,878
I'm trying!
24
00:03:24,918 --> 00:03:27,113
Man:
Get the hell off of me!
25
00:03:27,187 --> 00:03:30,179
There's no reason for all this.
We can handle this ourselves.
26
00:03:30,257 --> 00:03:32,418
Man:
It was an accident.
27
00:03:32,492 --> 00:03:34,323
It's a goddamn misunderstanding.
28
00:03:34,394 --> 00:03:38,262
Jill, would you tell them
we can handle this ourselves?
29
00:03:38,331 --> 00:03:41,391
- (baby crying)
- What the fuck are you looking at?
30
00:03:41,468 --> 00:03:44,528
It's your call.
You give me the say-so, he's gone.
31
00:03:44,604 --> 00:03:46,868
Excuse me!
Perhaps you didn't hear me.
32
00:03:46,940 --> 00:03:50,671
Man: For Christ's sakes, Jill,
open up your mouth!
33
00:03:56,516 --> 00:03:58,984
- Could you take him away?
- What?!
34
00:03:59,052 --> 00:04:02,249
- Officer: Get up!
- Just for a while, Travis.
35
00:04:02,322 --> 00:04:06,656
- Just until you cool down.
- You coerced her into saying that!
36
00:04:06,726 --> 00:04:10,093
- Simmer down, shitbag!
- Fine. Come on, you bitch!
37
00:04:10,163 --> 00:04:14,031
- Stop!
- Girl: Take him away already!
38
00:04:14,100 --> 00:04:15,294
Officer: Come on.
39
00:04:19,472 --> 00:04:21,565
Officer:
Come on, get in there.
40
00:04:21,641 --> 00:04:23,404
Get in there.
41
00:04:23,476 --> 00:04:24,807
Mrs. Lee?
42
00:04:26,513 --> 00:04:29,175
- I'm so sorry.
- Oh, no. Don't be.
43
00:04:29,249 --> 00:04:31,080
If you can wait,
I'll get you your money.
44
00:04:31,151 --> 00:04:33,949
- Is he giving you a hard time?
- Jill: No.
45
00:04:34,020 --> 00:04:37,512
- Not at all.
- Call me if you need anything.
46
00:04:39,626 --> 00:04:41,753
- The money...
- No. Don't.
47
00:04:41,828 --> 00:04:45,662
I understand. You won't be too old
for a clown next year.
48
00:04:45,732 --> 00:04:48,530
- Will I, Mommy?
- No.
49
00:04:49,636 --> 00:04:52,400
There it is, then.
Same time next year, Mom?
50
00:04:52,472 --> 00:04:55,407
- Sure. Thank you, Mr...
- Flappy.
51
00:04:55,475 --> 00:04:57,636
It's the illusion.
It's for the kids.
52
00:04:59,312 --> 00:05:01,007
I almost forgot.
53
00:05:01,081 --> 00:05:03,015
They would have taken away
my clown license
54
00:05:03,083 --> 00:05:04,744
if I'd let this one slip by.
55
00:05:04,818 --> 00:05:06,809
- You wouldn't rat on me, though?
- No.
56
00:05:06,886 --> 00:05:08,319
Here!
57
00:05:09,689 --> 00:05:12,089
And eat an extra
piece of cake for Flappy.
58
00:05:12,158 --> 00:05:14,422
You need it more than I do.
59
00:05:25,739 --> 00:05:29,300
- Twice in one day, loser!
- Fuck you, bastard!
60
00:05:46,793 --> 00:05:49,125
Free refill, please!
61
00:05:49,195 --> 00:05:51,288
Aren't you supposed
to be at a gig today?
62
00:05:51,364 --> 00:05:54,891
Well, it was canceled
at the zero hour.
63
00:05:54,968 --> 00:05:57,528
No wonder you are so damned testy.
What happened?
64
00:05:57,604 --> 00:06:00,539
The abridged version goes
something like this...
65
00:06:00,607 --> 00:06:02,700
will you cut it out?!
66
00:06:02,776 --> 00:06:05,540
Husband pounds wife.
Wife screams.
67
00:06:05,612 --> 00:06:08,479
Neighbors call cops.
Cops come, bust him.
68
00:06:08,548 --> 00:06:10,607
- The party's over.
- Raw deal.
69
00:06:10,684 --> 00:06:12,948
You got the cash, though?
70
00:06:13,019 --> 00:06:15,453
She didn't pay you?
Fuck that shit.
71
00:06:15,522 --> 00:06:17,615
Time is money,
spousal abuse or not.
72
00:06:17,691 --> 00:06:20,251
I'd be in small claims court,
if I were you.
73
00:06:20,326 --> 00:06:23,056
- Humanitarian to the last.
- Nevermind her.
74
00:06:23,129 --> 00:06:24,790
I almost forgot the big news.
75
00:06:24,864 --> 00:06:28,027
- My grandmother kicked me out.
- I've heard this before.
76
00:06:28,101 --> 00:06:29,591
She was pretty official
about it this time.
77
00:06:29,669 --> 00:06:33,298
Her lawyer sent me a letter saying
she doesn't want me around anymore
78
00:06:33,373 --> 00:06:37,002
because I don't pay bills
or get up before 12:00.
79
00:06:37,077 --> 00:06:39,170
- Nice.
- She can bite me anyway.
80
00:06:39,245 --> 00:06:41,975
I'll be flying solo soon.
I got a job.
81
00:06:42,048 --> 00:06:43,140
Where?
82
00:06:43,216 --> 00:06:46,014
Tuott the Basehead hooked me up
with Suds 'N' Stuff over the weekend.
83
00:06:46,086 --> 00:06:48,611
Watch yourself
on that corporate ladder.
84
00:06:48,688 --> 00:06:51,418
Listen to this bull.
Is that your limo outside?
85
00:06:51,491 --> 00:06:53,322
Driving around
in that little shitbox.
86
00:06:53,393 --> 00:06:56,021
That shitbox totes
your ass to and fro.
87
00:06:56,096 --> 00:07:00,396
You walk around with empty pockets
like some poor-ass church mouse.
88
00:07:00,467 --> 00:07:03,095
You know you need the extra cash.
Come work with me.
89
00:07:03,169 --> 00:07:05,399
- You get your own jumpsuit.
- No, thanks.
90
00:07:05,472 --> 00:07:07,906
That's how it starts.
Crappy job here, crappy job there,
91
00:07:07,974 --> 00:07:09,805
next thing you know,
you're 70 years old,
92
00:07:09,876 --> 00:07:12,538
living on the dole
wondering where your life went,
93
00:07:12,612 --> 00:07:15,547
and your best friend comes
cable-ready with a remote.
94
00:07:15,615 --> 00:07:18,015
That's beneath even you.
95
00:07:19,085 --> 00:07:21,349
- What's up your ass?
- Nothing.
96
00:07:21,421 --> 00:07:23,013
Shine bumpers if you want.
97
00:07:23,089 --> 00:07:25,250
Nobody's stopping you.
I'm sure you'll do well.
98
00:07:25,325 --> 00:07:27,953
You're right. I should hinge
my future on dancing around
99
00:07:28,027 --> 00:07:31,758
like a mongoloid on a bad acid trip
for a bunch of spoiled dick-heads.
100
00:07:31,831 --> 00:07:34,197
- You think what I do is stupid?
- All I'm saying
101
00:07:34,267 --> 00:07:37,293
is your life expectations
as far as clowning is concerned
102
00:07:37,370 --> 00:07:40,271
are far-fetched, dare I say,
totally unrealistic.
103
00:07:40,340 --> 00:07:43,468
It's what I want to do.
And I believe things will work out,
104
00:07:43,543 --> 00:07:47,240
and one day I'll make a good living
at it. Cliché, but humor me.
105
00:07:47,313 --> 00:07:49,338
How long did it take
to build Rome?
106
00:07:49,415 --> 00:07:52,145
Your problem is,
zero patience.
107
00:07:52,218 --> 00:07:56,211
I can see how the rise and fall
of Rome parallel your existence.
108
00:07:56,289 --> 00:07:57,449
You're barely surviving.
109
00:07:57,524 --> 00:07:59,287
The money you make...
sporadic at best.
110
00:07:59,359 --> 00:08:01,691
How much of your monthly take
goes for that nursing home?
111
00:08:01,761 --> 00:08:05,390
$200. But I only pay half,
'cause Uncle Sam picks up the rest.
112
00:08:05,465 --> 00:08:07,228
- How much do you make?
- It depends.
113
00:08:07,300 --> 00:08:09,860
I usually bring in...
114
00:08:09,936 --> 00:08:12,803
- maybe $500-$600.
- So, in other words, four.
115
00:08:12,872 --> 00:08:15,238
How do you pay rent,
car insurance and eat
116
00:08:15,308 --> 00:08:17,037
on 200 or 300 bucks a month?
117
00:08:17,110 --> 00:08:19,044
Mosier knocks
a couple of bucks off
118
00:08:19,112 --> 00:08:21,546
if I mow the lawn
or do some maintenance.
119
00:08:21,614 --> 00:08:25,448
Plus, to be honest, I don't exactly
pay insurance on that shitbox,
120
00:08:25,518 --> 00:08:27,008
as you so fondly referred to it.
121
00:08:27,086 --> 00:08:31,250
I'm in a quandary about
the resting home deal.
122
00:08:31,324 --> 00:08:33,315
Not for nothing, but your mom...
123
00:08:33,393 --> 00:08:35,258
- she's a bitch.
- Hey!
124
00:08:35,328 --> 00:08:36,886
That's my mom!
125
00:08:36,963 --> 00:08:38,692
My mother had a hard life.
126
00:08:38,765 --> 00:08:40,562
Her mother died
when she was three,
127
00:08:40,633 --> 00:08:42,828
and her father expected her
to take on the wifely duties...
128
00:08:42,902 --> 00:08:45,632
- all of them.
- I've heard this before.
129
00:08:45,705 --> 00:08:48,503
Why should you atone
for his shortcomings?
130
00:08:48,575 --> 00:08:51,408
- Plus, you call her names all the time.
- I know.
131
00:08:51,477 --> 00:08:55,004
But she's still my mom.
And there's a difference between
132
00:08:55,081 --> 00:08:57,242
calling your mother a bitch
and someone else saying it.
133
00:08:57,317 --> 00:09:00,980
Sorry.
She's such a bitch.
134
00:09:13,700 --> 00:09:16,168
- (beep)
- Recording: William, Sam Mosier.
135
00:09:16,236 --> 00:09:18,397
I don't want
to be a nut-biter,
136
00:09:18,471 --> 00:09:20,803
but I'll need
some money from you soon.
137
00:09:20,874 --> 00:09:23,138
There's just not
that much grass to mow.
138
00:09:23,209 --> 00:09:24,403
- (beep)
- Girl: Guess what,
139
00:09:24,477 --> 00:09:27,037
Mr. Flappy-the-Jerk-Off?
Your message sucks!
140
00:09:27,113 --> 00:09:29,377
- Girl: Clowns suck too.
- Girl #2: Tell him to eat shit.
141
00:09:31,284 --> 00:09:32,683
- (beep)
- Woman: Pick up the phone!
142
00:09:32,752 --> 00:09:34,185
I know you're there!
143
00:09:34,254 --> 00:09:36,586
I want to thank you
for being so goddamn worthless!
144
00:09:36,656 --> 00:09:38,988
They are asking me
for the money you owe!
145
00:09:39,058 --> 00:09:41,583
They want to know why
the rent hasn't been paid
146
00:09:41,661 --> 00:09:44,755
for this fucking cesspool
you've thrown me in!
147
00:09:44,831 --> 00:09:47,527
Try to understand this:
Bring the money today!
148
00:09:47,600 --> 00:09:50,000
- Now!
- (beep)
149
00:09:50,069 --> 00:09:52,162
Machine:
You have no more messages.
150
00:09:54,474 --> 00:09:56,032
Do you mind?
151
00:09:56,109 --> 00:09:58,339
Rumor has it
that backseat's comfortable.
152
00:09:58,411 --> 00:10:00,003
- Get away!
- (both laugh)
153
00:10:00,079 --> 00:10:02,104
What is he, your boss?
154
00:10:02,181 --> 00:10:04,411
- Are you his bitch?
- No!
155
00:10:10,423 --> 00:10:12,584
PA: Who's ready for bingo?
156
00:10:12,659 --> 00:10:14,684
Are you ready for bingo?
157
00:10:14,761 --> 00:10:18,822
The fun starts at 7:00
in the cafeteria.
158
00:10:18,898 --> 00:10:21,423
Don't forget your markers.
159
00:10:38,651 --> 00:10:41,176
Excuse me, ladies.
160
00:10:41,254 --> 00:10:43,085
How rude.
161
00:10:51,731 --> 00:10:54,393
- Get I get you anything else?
- No, not unless
162
00:10:54,467 --> 00:10:57,459
- you have a cure for my rheumatism.
- I wish.
163
00:11:03,009 --> 00:11:05,000
Will: Hi, Mom.
164
00:11:07,380 --> 00:11:10,076
It's my nap time.
Why don't you follow suit,
165
00:11:10,149 --> 00:11:12,014
and make like that
irritating little bitch?
166
00:11:12,085 --> 00:11:14,246
What are you talking about?
I just got here.
167
00:11:14,320 --> 00:11:18,814
I'm talking about you
being a source of embarrassment,
168
00:11:18,891 --> 00:11:20,688
a colossal disappointment!
169
00:11:20,760 --> 00:11:24,856
I wish I'd had the courage to take
that trip down the back alley.
170
00:11:24,931 --> 00:11:27,331
Come on.
I paid up some of the bill,
171
00:11:27,400 --> 00:11:29,994
so please,
can we have a nice visit?
172
00:11:30,069 --> 00:11:34,028
- Don't start with that.
- I am going to start.
173
00:11:34,107 --> 00:11:36,735
This room, if that's what
you want to call it,
174
00:11:36,809 --> 00:11:39,369
isn't provided
by some divine entity.
175
00:11:39,445 --> 00:11:42,346
I've had it up to here
with that bitch of a secretary,
176
00:11:42,415 --> 00:11:44,975
reminding me daily
that you're too stupid
177
00:11:45,051 --> 00:11:47,986
to remember that
I have to pay to live here.
178
00:11:48,054 --> 00:11:49,817
It's not
that I don't remember...
179
00:11:49,889 --> 00:11:53,484
Don't interrupt me. God damn it,
don't you dare contradict me!
180
00:11:53,559 --> 00:11:55,823
You show me
the respect I deserve.
181
00:11:55,895 --> 00:11:57,123
If your father were alive,
182
00:11:57,196 --> 00:11:59,528
I'd have him slap you
in your snotty little mouth.
183
00:11:59,599 --> 00:12:01,590
- Here we go.
- What did you say?!
184
00:12:01,667 --> 00:12:05,068
- How dare you? Get over here...
- Relax. I didn't mean it.
185
00:12:05,138 --> 00:12:08,198
- Get your ass over here!
- I won't let you hit me!
186
00:12:08,274 --> 00:12:10,742
Forget it, I'll leave
before that happens.
187
00:12:11,978 --> 00:12:15,914
Well, it wouldn't be
the first time, would it?
188
00:12:15,982 --> 00:12:18,348
That's always the way
it's been with you.
189
00:12:18,418 --> 00:12:20,784
Couldn't stand on your own two feet
to defend yourself,
190
00:12:20,853 --> 00:12:23,048
if your worthless
life depended on it.
191
00:12:23,122 --> 00:12:26,250
Run away, William.
It's your answer to everything.
192
00:12:27,427 --> 00:12:29,987
You don't have to stay!
193
00:12:31,064 --> 00:12:34,090
I know you don't want
to come to see me.
194
00:12:34,167 --> 00:12:36,135
Yes, I do.
195
00:12:36,202 --> 00:12:37,897
I like to come and see you.
196
00:12:37,970 --> 00:12:41,929
I just wish you'd relax a little
and not get so short-tempered.
197
00:12:43,009 --> 00:12:46,445
I get so lonely around here.
198
00:12:46,512 --> 00:12:48,810
Nobody talks to me.
199
00:12:49,882 --> 00:12:51,816
Nobody bothers with me at all.
200
00:12:51,884 --> 00:12:53,818
They have their own
little circles.
201
00:12:53,886 --> 00:12:55,854
They don't want
to know from anyone.
202
00:12:55,922 --> 00:12:58,686
- They think they're better than me.
- Come on, Mom.
203
00:12:58,758 --> 00:13:00,783
You know that's not true.
204
00:13:00,860 --> 00:13:03,624
So, suddenly, you're
some kind of big man, huh?
205
00:13:03,696 --> 00:13:06,028
Not so big that you can
earn a decent living,
206
00:13:06,099 --> 00:13:07,828
let alone take care
of your own mother!
207
00:13:07,900 --> 00:13:11,028
I am so happy that God showed grace
enough to take your father away,
208
00:13:13,973 --> 00:13:17,170
- The account is nearly paid up...
- You know what you are?
209
00:13:17,243 --> 00:13:20,041
- A whole lot of nothing!
- I'm trying...
210
00:13:20,113 --> 00:13:22,411
Trying won't get you
through life!
211
00:13:22,482 --> 00:13:24,677
Actions will get you through it.
212
00:13:24,750 --> 00:13:26,581
I thought you'd have
learned that by now.
213
00:13:26,652 --> 00:13:29,086
- If your father...
- Enough about him!
214
00:13:29,155 --> 00:13:31,555
What do you have to canonize
that son of a bitch?!
215
00:13:31,624 --> 00:13:35,651
I know the way he was.
I know what you went through!
216
00:13:35,728 --> 00:13:39,164
I'm sick of listening
to how fucking great he was!
217
00:13:42,602 --> 00:13:44,593
I'm sorry.
218
00:13:44,670 --> 00:13:49,266
- I shouldn't have said that.
- Get out!
219
00:13:49,342 --> 00:13:51,810
It was out of line.
I apologize.
220
00:13:53,112 --> 00:13:55,876
I said, get the hell out!
221
00:13:55,948 --> 00:13:58,246
Oh God! Somebody...
222
00:13:58,317 --> 00:14:00,046
get him out of here!
223
00:14:00,119 --> 00:14:03,748
I can't stand to look at you.
Get the fuck out!
224
00:14:07,226 --> 00:14:09,694
Woman:
Don't let him get away.
225
00:14:09,795 --> 00:14:12,161
You and me, go round to round,
Jersey style.
226
00:14:12,231 --> 00:14:14,495
Take it on,
you smelly bitch.
227
00:14:16,169 --> 00:14:18,330
Hey, it's clowny!
228
00:14:18,404 --> 00:14:20,634
- Give me a dollar!
- Yeah, give him a dollar.
229
00:14:20,706 --> 00:14:23,766
Those boys giving you
some trouble, Willie?
230
00:14:23,843 --> 00:14:26,744
- Nothing I can't handle.
- Bunch of roughnecks.
231
00:14:26,812 --> 00:14:29,110
- Did you get my message?
- Yeah. I'm sorry.
232
00:14:29,182 --> 00:14:31,582
I lost a couple of jobs
this past week.
233
00:14:31,651 --> 00:14:35,815
Will, I need your help.
Somebody's stealing my utilities.
234
00:14:35,888 --> 00:14:38,880
- Oh yeah?
- Maybe you overheard something?
235
00:14:38,958 --> 00:14:41,756
No, I haven't.
But I'll let you know if I do.
236
00:14:43,095 --> 00:14:44,960
I know your word, Will.
237
00:15:25,137 --> 00:15:27,037
# I wish I was a fry cook #
238
00:15:27,106 --> 00:15:29,768
# Hurray, hurray. #
239
00:15:29,842 --> 00:15:32,936
"Parking attendants." No.
240
00:15:34,013 --> 00:15:37,676
"Recreational Center
counselor." No.
241
00:15:37,750 --> 00:15:41,015
"Office manager."
Pff! Hell no.
242
00:15:41,087 --> 00:15:42,418
No.
243
00:15:42,488 --> 00:15:43,955
No.
244
00:15:44,023 --> 00:15:45,650
No.
245
00:15:45,725 --> 00:15:47,215
And no.
246
00:15:53,532 --> 00:15:55,966
"Let me watch you
fuck my wife"?!
247
00:15:56,035 --> 00:15:58,026
"Her, deliciously plump.
248
00:15:58,104 --> 00:16:00,664
You, big and Black
with huge set."
249
00:16:02,875 --> 00:16:05,366
"You supply
the bathroom brownies,
250
00:16:05,444 --> 00:16:07,378
I sample them."
251
00:16:09,282 --> 00:16:12,274
"Why settle for less when you can
have three holes going?
252
00:16:12,351 --> 00:16:15,980
Call Katlyn for an unforgettable
bachelor party."
253
00:16:16,055 --> 00:16:18,580
Sick, sick people.
254
00:16:23,095 --> 00:16:24,585
Bachelor parties.
255
00:16:43,282 --> 00:16:46,308
What's the occasion?
This place is fucking posh.
256
00:16:46,385 --> 00:16:49,650
What took you so long?
Why is your hair wet?
257
00:16:49,722 --> 00:16:52,657
Because I took a shower.
Good thing I did.
258
00:16:52,725 --> 00:16:55,319
- Check this out.
- What's this?
259
00:16:55,394 --> 00:16:58,989
An epiphany. The single
greatest idea I've ever had.
260
00:17:02,234 --> 00:17:03,895
What do you want?
261
00:17:03,969 --> 00:17:06,403
- Hi...
- Order something.
262
00:17:06,472 --> 00:17:09,407
Oh. Could I have a burger...
charbroiled...
263
00:17:09,475 --> 00:17:11,875
with an order
of fries and a coke?
264
00:17:17,283 --> 00:17:20,047
- What are you looking at?
- Nothing.
265
00:17:20,119 --> 00:17:22,349
Can I get a coffee? Black.
266
00:17:22,421 --> 00:17:23,911
I'm buying. Order something.
267
00:17:26,158 --> 00:17:27,489
Nah.
268
00:17:30,663 --> 00:17:32,290
What?
269
00:17:32,365 --> 00:17:33,992
- What's wrong?
- " You are invited.
270
00:17:34,066 --> 00:17:35,966
Come to my poop party"?
271
00:17:36,035 --> 00:17:38,026
You'll let people
take a dump on you?
272
00:17:38,104 --> 00:17:40,299
- What?
- You're sick.
273
00:17:40,373 --> 00:17:42,534
I thought I knew you, man.
274
00:17:42,608 --> 00:17:45,008
No. That's where
I got the idea from.
275
00:17:45,077 --> 00:17:48,376
- Nobody's gonna crap in your face?
- Of course not, you idiot.
276
00:17:48,447 --> 00:17:51,644
I changed my mind. Give me the same
as him, with two free refills.
277
00:17:51,717 --> 00:17:53,309
- Waitress: Too late.
- Quit screwing around and listen.
278
00:17:53,386 --> 00:17:56,753
Picture this.
It's the night before your wedding,
279
00:17:56,822 --> 00:18:00,087
and your friends have gotten together
to throw you a bachelor party.
280
00:18:00,159 --> 00:18:02,559
You expect some booze
and bawdy behavior,
281
00:18:02,628 --> 00:18:05,256
and of course,
the requisite buxom babe. Standard.
282
00:18:05,331 --> 00:18:07,856
This guy will eat
your boogers free, for nothing.
283
00:18:07,933 --> 00:18:12,063
That's where I come in.
The groom-to-be is expecting a bimbo
284
00:18:12,138 --> 00:18:14,766
with tits from here till Tuesday
and a gyrating lap dance.
285
00:18:14,840 --> 00:18:19,334
Instead, it's a male clown with
fishnets and garters and a bustier,
286
00:18:28,621 --> 00:18:31,920
Did you eat crack for breakfast?
What's the matter with you?
287
00:18:31,991 --> 00:18:34,425
It's a joke. Get it?
288
00:18:34,493 --> 00:18:37,223
Instead of the stripper,
I show up to the party
289
00:18:37,296 --> 00:18:38,923
and shock the shit out
of the groom!
290
00:18:38,998 --> 00:18:41,193
You're confident
there's a calling for that?
291
00:18:41,267 --> 00:18:43,861
No one will be ripping
my door off the hinges at first,
292
00:18:43,936 --> 00:18:46,302
but word of mouth advertising.
293
00:18:46,372 --> 00:18:48,772
I could develop
a cult following.
294
00:18:48,841 --> 00:18:51,776
Admit, you've never heard
anything like this before.
295
00:18:51,844 --> 00:18:54,904
- You got me there.
- Everyone except the groom-to-be
296
00:18:54,980 --> 00:18:56,242
is in on the joke.
297
00:18:56,315 --> 00:18:58,909
I show up 20 minutes
before the real entertainment,
298
00:18:58,984 --> 00:19:02,215
put on a show, then take off.
It'll be funny!
299
00:19:02,288 --> 00:19:03,812
Will you still use
the name Flappy?
300
00:19:03,889 --> 00:19:06,824
- 'Cause that will cause confusion.
- What do you think?
301
00:19:06,892 --> 00:19:09,122
What's your stage name?
You need a moniker.
302
00:19:09,195 --> 00:19:11,390
You can help me out with that.
303
00:19:13,499 --> 00:19:18,027
I know. How about " Will,
the naked and retarded clown"?
304
00:19:18,103 --> 00:19:21,266
I won't be naked.
Think of something else.
305
00:19:21,340 --> 00:19:24,366
Call a spade a spade.
What you're proposing is vulgar.
306
00:19:26,512 --> 00:19:28,002
Vulgar.
307
00:19:29,748 --> 00:19:32,216
It has sort of
a nice ring to it.
308
00:19:33,886 --> 00:19:37,219
- That might work, actually.
- Work it.
309
00:20:16,962 --> 00:20:19,157
37.
310
00:20:19,231 --> 00:20:22,564
Well, here goes something.
311
00:20:33,245 --> 00:20:35,008
Hello, boys!
312
00:20:35,080 --> 00:20:36,945
Guess who!
313
00:20:43,155 --> 00:20:45,680
Oh. I'm sorry.
314
00:20:45,758 --> 00:20:48,784
- I must have the wrong place.
- Not if you're ready to get down.
315
00:20:50,429 --> 00:20:53,398
- Looks like you are.
- Man #2: I got him!
316
00:20:55,434 --> 00:20:58,267
You and my dad,
you're going to do the dog.
317
00:20:58,337 --> 00:21:01,067
Man #1: Frankie, back off!
He don't need to know that just yet.
318
00:21:01,140 --> 00:21:02,937
You don't come near him
until I give the say so.
319
00:21:03,008 --> 00:21:05,738
This is my goddamn party!
I run the show.
320
00:21:05,811 --> 00:21:07,642
Get your pajamas on.
321
00:21:07,713 --> 00:21:08,702
Man #3: Whoa!
322
00:21:09,915 --> 00:21:13,373
I didn't get to do anything!
323
00:21:13,452 --> 00:21:15,545
You promised he'd be pretty.
324
00:21:15,621 --> 00:21:19,057
- He's fucking ugly.
- Close the lips, monkey balls!
325
00:21:19,124 --> 00:21:21,024
- He's Daddy's treat!
- Shut up, Frankie!
326
00:21:21,093 --> 00:21:23,687
- You're trying to kiss up...
- You're jealous, Gino,
327
00:21:23,762 --> 00:21:26,094
because Daddy let me hit the clown.
He likes me better!
328
00:21:26,165 --> 00:21:29,601
- He doesn't like you better.
- (voices overlap)
329
00:21:29,668 --> 00:21:32,933
Where do you think you're going?
This party ain't over.
330
00:21:33,005 --> 00:21:36,133
There's a shitload of fun to be had
before you call this a night.
331
00:21:37,209 --> 00:21:38,801
Will: Help me.
332
00:21:38,877 --> 00:21:42,176
Get that, Gino.
This ain't no spectator sport.
333
00:21:52,725 --> 00:21:54,955
- I can do that.
- Well, do it.
334
00:21:58,397 --> 00:22:00,922
Gino, show your brother
a couple of steps over there.
335
00:22:01,000 --> 00:22:04,401
That boy has two left feet.
336
00:22:05,471 --> 00:22:07,371
Stop that kind of dancing.
337
00:22:21,520 --> 00:22:25,513
- Why do you get to be the clown?
- Because I'm older.
338
00:22:25,591 --> 00:22:28,219
And I don't want
any more lip from you.
339
00:22:28,293 --> 00:22:33,356
- What is going on over there?
- He won't let me be the clown.
340
00:22:33,432 --> 00:22:37,334
I'm older.
I'm pretending I'm the clown.
341
00:22:37,403 --> 00:22:40,372
Frankie's Daddy's little boy.
That's all.
342
00:22:40,439 --> 00:22:43,533
Frankie, listen to your brother.
He is the boss.
343
00:22:43,609 --> 00:22:45,042
No!
344
00:22:45,110 --> 00:22:46,668
Uh-oh.
345
00:22:46,745 --> 00:22:50,203
What the fuck are you saying?
Shut the fuck up!
346
00:22:50,282 --> 00:22:53,308
- I'll beat your ass!
- If you motherfuckers can't get along,
347
00:22:53,385 --> 00:22:55,285
I am never bringing you
with me ever again.
348
00:22:55,354 --> 00:22:57,151
Is that what you want?
349
00:22:57,222 --> 00:22:58,849
- No.
- No.
350
00:22:58,924 --> 00:23:01,256
You know it's sweet.
351
00:23:01,326 --> 00:23:04,454
Do you want to miss out
on your chance to...
352
00:23:04,530 --> 00:23:06,589
Shut your mouths!
353
00:23:07,833 --> 00:23:10,358
I want you to watch him.
Can you do that?
354
00:23:10,436 --> 00:23:13,166
- I can.
- Dad, he's getting away.
355
00:23:13,238 --> 00:23:17,334
- Will somebody stop him?
- I could have stopped him.
356
00:23:27,453 --> 00:23:29,921
Save some for us.
357
00:23:29,988 --> 00:23:32,422
Dad: Where did you put
my dust pipe?
358
00:23:32,491 --> 00:23:35,790
- In the shitbag.
- Oh, the shitbag.
359
00:23:35,861 --> 00:23:38,352
I almost forgot
about the shitbag.
360
00:23:38,430 --> 00:23:41,627
Gino... get the camera.
361
00:23:41,700 --> 00:23:43,691
I want to make a record of this.
362
00:23:43,769 --> 00:23:46,897
If I'm not mistaken,
Mr. Fuckface here is...
363
00:23:46,972 --> 00:23:48,234
cherry.
364
00:23:51,944 --> 00:23:56,608
Gino: Daddy,
you want it on SP, LP or SLP?
365
00:23:56,682 --> 00:23:58,775
I don't give a fat rat's ass,
stupid bastard.
366
00:23:58,851 --> 00:24:01,046
- Just turn it on.
- It is on.
367
00:24:02,354 --> 00:24:05,346
Shut the fuck up.
I'm gonna start the show.
368
00:24:05,424 --> 00:24:09,383
What's your name?
I asked you a question, sweet ass.
369
00:24:11,497 --> 00:24:12,930
Vulgar.
370
00:24:12,998 --> 00:24:16,729
- Vulgar the Clown.
- Suck my daddy, swine fuck!
371
00:24:17,803 --> 00:24:20,465
Gino: Daddy!
He's ruining everything!
372
00:24:20,539 --> 00:24:23,736
Shut the fuck up, Gino!
You fucking pussy!
373
00:24:23,809 --> 00:24:25,777
Get your sphincter
out of my frame, asshole!
374
00:24:25,844 --> 00:24:27,675
Cut it out!
375
00:24:27,746 --> 00:24:30,306
I mean, your real name,
funny man!
376
00:24:30,382 --> 00:24:33,874
Stop laughing.
Set him back up, you cocks.
377
00:24:33,952 --> 00:24:36,386
We'll just take that part out.
378
00:24:36,455 --> 00:24:38,616
All right, asshole.
Same question.
379
00:24:38,690 --> 00:24:41,989
- What the fuck is your name?
- William.
380
00:24:42,060 --> 00:24:44,290
- Will: Why are you doing this?
- Okay, William.
381
00:24:44,363 --> 00:24:45,352
Willy.
Willy Billy.
382
00:24:45,430 --> 00:24:49,161
- What is it that you do?
- I'm a party clown for kids.
383
00:24:49,234 --> 00:24:51,134
No, you're not.
You're a cocksucker!
384
00:24:51,203 --> 00:24:52,727
You want me blowing it
down your throat.
385
00:24:52,805 --> 00:24:55,467
- No.
- Liar. I know faggots like you.
386
00:24:55,541 --> 00:24:59,068
Nothing like the feeling of some
fucker's shaft down your throat, huh?
387
00:24:59,144 --> 00:25:01,009
Could be some basehead.
What do you care?
388
00:25:01,079 --> 00:25:02,944
Probably suck down
his infected manstuff,
389
00:25:03,015 --> 00:25:04,983
smile and call it
cherry pie.
390
00:25:05,050 --> 00:25:07,211
You get off on that shit,
don't you?
391
00:25:07,286 --> 00:25:10,312
- No...
- Yes, you do!
392
00:25:18,263 --> 00:25:20,163
Come on, let me go.
393
00:25:20,232 --> 00:25:21,756
I don't even know who you are.
394
00:25:21,834 --> 00:25:26,567
- My daddy's name is Edwina.
- Shut your hole, you moron!
395
00:25:26,638 --> 00:25:28,731
You always do that.
396
00:25:28,807 --> 00:25:31,367
I won't try to press charges.
397
00:25:31,443 --> 00:25:33,968
You're goddamn right you won't.
398
00:25:34,046 --> 00:25:36,981
He's afraid of Dad.
Look at him.
399
00:25:37,049 --> 00:25:39,415
He should be afraid of Dad.
Dad's tough.
400
00:25:39,484 --> 00:25:42,248
- Let me fuck his cock pouch.
- Dad: Not yet.
401
00:25:42,321 --> 00:25:44,755
- Now!!
- Dad: Soon, though.
402
00:25:44,823 --> 00:25:46,051
Soon you'll taste what's good.
403
00:25:46,124 --> 00:25:48,615
But first,
I want him to say the words.
404
00:25:48,694 --> 00:25:52,391
Say, "I love to suck cock."
405
00:25:54,299 --> 00:25:56,233
All right. All right.
406
00:25:56,301 --> 00:25:59,361
I love to suck cock.
407
00:25:59,438 --> 00:26:04,273
"My name is William,
and I love to suck cock."
408
00:26:04,343 --> 00:26:06,811
My name is William,
409
00:26:06,879 --> 00:26:08,938
and I love to suck cock.
410
00:26:09,014 --> 00:26:11,949
- Tonight's the night.
- Please, stop.
411
00:26:12,017 --> 00:26:14,713
What we have here
is a failure to communicate.
412
00:26:14,786 --> 00:26:18,278
- Some men you just can't reach.
- Please, Edwina.
413
00:26:19,358 --> 00:26:20,848
Turn that thing off!
414
00:26:20,926 --> 00:26:23,019
What the fuck
did you say to me?
415
00:26:23,095 --> 00:26:26,587
- Uh... tonight's the night.
- Before that.
416
00:26:26,665 --> 00:26:28,997
- You said my name.
- I'm sorry.
417
00:26:29,067 --> 00:26:32,662
- I didn't know.
- All right. Ass on the bed. Now!
418
00:26:32,738 --> 00:26:34,569
If I have to tell you again,
419
00:26:34,640 --> 00:26:38,041
the wind will be whistling Dixie
through a hole in your face.
420
00:26:38,110 --> 00:26:40,476
Me and you are going to bed.
That's a fact!
421
00:26:40,545 --> 00:26:43,708
I'm going to make hate to you!
Get your ass up there!
422
00:26:52,491 --> 00:26:55,358
What do you think?
We're going to kiss?
423
00:26:55,427 --> 00:26:57,292
Get him
on his fucking stomach!
424
00:26:57,362 --> 00:26:59,626
Quit holding me up, Gino.
Come on.
425
00:27:00,632 --> 00:27:02,224
Get away from me.
426
00:27:02,301 --> 00:27:03,791
Will: No!
427
00:27:05,304 --> 00:27:08,000
- Time for the dog, Pop.
- Don't rush me.
428
00:27:08,073 --> 00:27:11,167
- Daddy's going to cock him hard.
- Damn right, I am!
429
00:27:11,243 --> 00:27:14,576
And you boys
will toss the salad!
430
00:27:14,646 --> 00:27:17,513
- You never had it so good, did you?
- He never did.
431
00:27:17,582 --> 00:27:19,174
Rim job!
432
00:27:20,352 --> 00:27:23,321
- Now, the shame.
- (Will screams)
433
00:27:23,388 --> 00:27:25,652
Frankie:
Daddy's making his move!
434
00:27:43,041 --> 00:27:44,668
Mother: (distorted)
You know what you are, William?
435
00:27:44,743 --> 00:27:46,438
A whole lot of nothing.
436
00:27:49,681 --> 00:27:52,844
Do you know?
Who got the shitbag?
437
00:27:52,918 --> 00:27:55,386
You're holding it, Dad.
438
00:28:00,492 --> 00:28:02,483
He was good.
439
00:30:43,488 --> 00:30:45,115
You...
440
00:30:45,190 --> 00:30:47,681
you fucking nobody!
441
00:32:34,399 --> 00:32:36,458
(kno cking o n do o r)
442
00:32:39,804 --> 00:32:42,329
Open up, Will.
443
00:32:42,407 --> 00:32:45,274
When was last time
you cleaned this place?
444
00:32:46,344 --> 00:32:48,141
What are you doing?
445
00:32:48,213 --> 00:32:50,909
Shit, what happened?
446
00:32:50,982 --> 00:32:52,973
Who did this?
447
00:32:53,051 --> 00:32:56,418
Did somebody rob you?
One of those fucks outside?
448
00:32:56,488 --> 00:32:59,821
You sit there, all right?
You'll be fine.
449
00:32:59,891 --> 00:33:02,451
- I'll call the cops.
- No!
450
00:33:02,527 --> 00:33:04,825
Don't call anyone.
451
00:33:05,897 --> 00:33:08,991
- You couldn't, even if I let you.
- Why?
452
00:33:11,770 --> 00:33:15,262
Will, tell me
what happened to you.
453
00:33:15,340 --> 00:33:17,035
I'll tell you.
454
00:33:17,108 --> 00:33:20,271
I'll tell you. Just...
455
00:33:20,345 --> 00:33:23,109
don't say a word, 'cause
once I tell you, that's it,
456
00:33:23,181 --> 00:33:25,615
it's never mentioned again.
457
00:33:25,684 --> 00:33:28,812
- I don't think...
- I don't care about what you think
458
00:33:28,887 --> 00:33:30,980
at this precise moment.
459
00:33:32,991 --> 00:33:34,822
What I'm about to tell you...
460
00:33:34,893 --> 00:33:36,986
is not to leave this room.
461
00:33:37,062 --> 00:33:39,656
It can't and it won't.
462
00:33:40,732 --> 00:33:42,791
I'll deal with it
in my own way.
463
00:33:42,867 --> 00:33:46,359
So, please, no questions or
suggestions about what I should do.
464
00:33:46,438 --> 00:33:48,929
As far as anyone else
is concerned,
465
00:33:49,007 --> 00:33:50,736
I was down by Gravely Point,
466
00:33:50,809 --> 00:33:53,437
and got jumped by some guy
with a limp and a.44
467
00:33:53,511 --> 00:33:56,241
who pistol-whipped my ass
and took my wallet.
468
00:33:56,314 --> 00:33:57,645
All right?
469
00:33:59,084 --> 00:34:01,245
What choice do I have?
470
00:34:02,420 --> 00:34:03,751
This is what happened.
471
00:34:03,822 --> 00:34:06,723
- Will: I must have the wrong place.
- Dad: Not if you're ready to get down.
472
00:34:08,593 --> 00:34:10,720
Dad: Now, the shame.
473
00:34:11,029 --> 00:34:14,760
What happened after that,
I don't remember so hot.
474
00:34:14,833 --> 00:34:18,132
All I know is that I woke up
this morning alive,
475
00:34:18,203 --> 00:34:21,832
and I'm still trying to decide
whether I should be thankful for that.
476
00:34:21,906 --> 00:34:24,568
I don't believe this.
477
00:34:24,642 --> 00:34:26,439
What did the doctor say?
478
00:34:27,746 --> 00:34:30,306
You didn't go to the hospital?
479
00:34:30,382 --> 00:34:33,840
- I just wanted to be home.
- Somebody has to look at you.
480
00:34:33,918 --> 00:34:35,818
No questions, no suggestions.
481
00:34:35,887 --> 00:34:38,754
One of those scumbags
could have given you a disease.
482
00:34:38,823 --> 00:34:41,792
- You agreed!
- I know what I said!
483
00:34:41,860 --> 00:34:44,658
But we have to find these guys.
They're sick!
484
00:34:44,729 --> 00:34:47,664
- You could have AIDS!
- You think I haven't thought of that?
485
00:34:47,732 --> 00:34:50,257
You don't think
that was my first thought?
486
00:34:50,335 --> 00:34:53,031
Fucking A, right, it was!
But you know what?
487
00:34:53,104 --> 00:34:56,801
If one of them did have it,
there's nothing I can do.
488
00:34:56,875 --> 00:34:59,639
- Will...
- Will you shut the fuck up?!
489
00:34:59,711 --> 00:35:02,179
You're leaving them out there
to do it to somebody else!
490
00:35:02,247 --> 00:35:04,613
- Not my problem.
- It is your problem!
491
00:35:04,682 --> 00:35:07,116
Cops can track dogshit
like these guys down.
492
00:35:07,185 --> 00:35:09,710
- You can help.
- How would that look?
493
00:35:09,788 --> 00:35:12,951
- How would what look?
- A man dressed as a perverted clown,
494
00:35:13,024 --> 00:35:15,720
shows up to a party
for three men and cries foul
495
00:35:15,794 --> 00:35:18,126
- after being roughed up a bit?
- A bit?!
496
00:35:18,196 --> 00:35:22,098
- There's more to it than that.
- Do you want to know why?
497
00:35:22,167 --> 00:35:24,397
Because that's what
a lawyer would do.
498
00:35:24,469 --> 00:35:26,562
And I won't sit in front
of a jury who thinks
499
00:35:26,638 --> 00:35:29,539
I'm some degenerate
defending my character.
500
00:35:29,607 --> 00:35:33,703
- You're not honest with yourself.
- Will you stop reacting,
501
00:35:33,778 --> 00:35:37,976
and think about it?!
They held me down and raped me!
502
00:35:38,049 --> 00:35:40,950
Exactly! That's why you shouldn't
let them walk!
503
00:35:41,019 --> 00:35:44,785
- You should...
- Syd, I don't want anyone to know!
504
00:35:44,856 --> 00:35:46,790
That's why.
505
00:35:48,293 --> 00:35:50,659
I don't want anyone to know.
506
00:35:50,728 --> 00:35:53,822
I just don't want anyone to know.
507
00:35:53,898 --> 00:35:57,390
- I don't want anyone to know!
- All right. It's okay.
508
00:35:57,469 --> 00:35:58,800
Syd: No one else, right?
509
00:35:58,870 --> 00:36:01,430
- (Will sobs)
- Nobody else.
510
00:36:01,506 --> 00:36:03,098
Nobody else.
511
00:37:17,215 --> 00:37:20,378
Will: Mrs. Affleck?
This is Will Carlson,
512
00:37:20,451 --> 00:37:23,284
the party clown.
I know it's short notice,
513
00:37:23,354 --> 00:37:25,117
I won't be able to make it.
514
00:37:25,189 --> 00:37:27,384
I'm sorry,
something came up.
515
00:37:27,458 --> 00:37:30,894
No, I can't. I can't.
516
00:37:34,198 --> 00:37:37,224
(with clown voice)
Yes, this is really Flappy.
517
00:37:37,302 --> 00:37:39,668
No, it really is.
518
00:37:39,737 --> 00:37:41,204
L...
519
00:37:41,272 --> 00:37:43,001
I'll be there, Benny.
520
00:37:43,074 --> 00:37:45,099
See you soon.
521
00:37:57,755 --> 00:37:59,780
- Whoa, hold up!
- (sirens wailing)
522
00:38:01,759 --> 00:38:05,422
- (crash)
- Watch where you're going, fuckstick!
523
00:38:05,496 --> 00:38:07,157
Sorry!
524
00:38:07,231 --> 00:38:08,755
- Hurry up!
- Will: What's going on?
525
00:38:08,833 --> 00:38:11,461
Some dickhead got
his walking papers.
526
00:38:11,536 --> 00:38:14,266
That thing friggin' rules!
Let's go!
527
00:38:14,339 --> 00:38:16,705
- Will: Walking papers?
- Divorce papers, dumbass!
528
00:38:18,643 --> 00:38:20,941
Where do you think
you're going?
529
00:38:21,012 --> 00:38:23,776
I'll have that shitbox
towed right out of here!
530
00:38:28,086 --> 00:38:30,486
Officer: Don't you people
have jobs? Let's go.
531
00:38:30,555 --> 00:38:32,113
Move it back. Let's go.
532
00:38:32,190 --> 00:38:34,317
Captain:
I repeat, put the weapon down.
533
00:38:34,392 --> 00:38:36,087
Let Ashley go, Travis.
534
00:38:36,160 --> 00:38:38,993
I repeat,
go fuck yourself!
535
00:38:39,063 --> 00:38:41,122
She's in charge here, not me!
536
00:38:41,199 --> 00:38:44,168
Travis: Not you, her!
Jill started all this shit!
537
00:38:44,235 --> 00:38:46,226
Ashley knows it too!
538
00:38:46,304 --> 00:38:47,794
You hear that?!
She knows!
539
00:38:49,340 --> 00:38:52,400
You think you can sneak around
on me and get a divorce?
540
00:38:52,477 --> 00:38:55,878
I want what's rightfully mine!
I want what's coming to me.
541
00:38:55,947 --> 00:38:58,211
Captain: I know you don't
want to hurt your daughter.
542
00:38:58,282 --> 00:39:01,376
We both know that.
This is about something else.
543
00:39:01,452 --> 00:39:04,478
Just talk to me.
Maybe we can figure something out.
544
00:39:04,555 --> 00:39:07,285
- It'd be better...
- I'll tell you what'd be better.
545
00:39:07,358 --> 00:39:08,985
Send that bitch in here!
546
00:39:09,060 --> 00:39:11,255
She comes in, Ashley comes out.
547
00:39:11,329 --> 00:39:13,661
Get your damn hands off me!
I have to go!
548
00:39:13,731 --> 00:39:17,098
If your mother would listen,
we wouldn't have to go through this.
549
00:39:22,306 --> 00:39:23,830
You think I'm fucking with you?
550
00:39:23,908 --> 00:39:25,637
You're talking about
clearing this shit up,
551
00:39:25,710 --> 00:39:27,268
you've got cops skulking around!
552
00:39:27,345 --> 00:39:29,245
Don't jerk me off,
Captain!
553
00:39:38,456 --> 00:39:40,447
Captain:
It doesn't have to be this way.
554
00:39:40,525 --> 00:39:42,516
That's the way it's gotta be!
555
00:39:42,593 --> 00:39:44,891
If I go out,
I ain't going out alone!
556
00:39:44,962 --> 00:39:47,453
I'll take a few
of you fucks with me!
557
00:39:47,532 --> 00:39:51,195
Captain: No one's been hurt.
Walk away with a clean conscience.
558
00:39:51,269 --> 00:39:54,170
- It'll be better for us both.
- I'm better than you!
559
00:39:54,238 --> 00:39:56,763
- Better than all of you!
- Captain: Talk to me, Travis.
560
00:39:56,841 --> 00:39:58,934
I need to know
everything's okay in there.
561
00:39:59,010 --> 00:40:01,103
We're going to arrange
a meeting with your wife.
562
00:40:01,179 --> 00:40:02,874
Nobody else, just her!
563
00:40:02,947 --> 00:40:04,812
Captain:
You know I can't promise that.
564
00:40:04,882 --> 00:40:07,407
Travis: You think
I'm some kind of asshole?!
565
00:40:07,485 --> 00:40:11,148
You think I don't know I'm fucked?
You're fucked too!
566
00:40:11,222 --> 00:40:12,450
No matter what you think,
567
00:40:12,523 --> 00:40:14,957
you're not walking away
from this a winner. No way!
568
00:40:15,026 --> 00:40:17,358
Captain:
Is there anything you'd like?
569
00:40:17,428 --> 00:40:18,827
Some sandwiches, coffee maybe?
570
00:40:18,896 --> 00:40:21,023
- Something for Ashley?
- Travis: No!
571
00:40:21,099 --> 00:40:23,465
There's only one thing
on my mind.
572
00:40:23,534 --> 00:40:26,162
You have the power
to grant me one request?
573
00:40:26,237 --> 00:40:28,000
Captain: Within reason.
What do you want?
574
00:40:28,072 --> 00:40:30,597
Bitch's head on a stake.
575
00:40:45,757 --> 00:40:47,782
A deranged father.
576
00:40:47,859 --> 00:40:50,054
An innocent young girl.
577
00:40:50,128 --> 00:40:52,790
It could have ended up yet
another statistic
578
00:40:52,864 --> 00:40:56,425
in the growing holocaust
of violent domestic unrest
579
00:40:56,501 --> 00:40:58,867
that plagues this country.
580
00:40:58,936 --> 00:41:01,336
But a hometown hero
got involved.
581
00:41:01,405 --> 00:41:04,272
Or rather,
a hometown clown.
582
00:41:04,342 --> 00:41:07,436
A clown who's got something
to smile about,
583
00:41:07,512 --> 00:41:10,811
one eternally grateful
little girl.
584
00:41:10,882 --> 00:41:13,680
Let's please welcome
Will Carlson,
585
00:41:13,751 --> 00:41:17,619
better known as Flappy the Clown.
Welcome to the show.
586
00:41:29,467 --> 00:41:30,627
Will...
587
00:41:30,701 --> 00:41:32,828
what I'd like you to do now
588
00:41:32,904 --> 00:41:34,872
is to take us back.
589
00:41:34,939 --> 00:41:37,203
Tell me what was going
through your mind,
590
00:41:37,275 --> 00:41:39,869
what the catalyst,
one might say,
591
00:41:39,944 --> 00:41:44,074
was that led you
to confront this maniac?
592
00:41:44,148 --> 00:41:48,084
I've given this some thought
over the past few days.
593
00:41:48,152 --> 00:41:50,177
To be totally honest,
594
00:41:50,254 --> 00:41:52,347
I still don't know.
595
00:41:52,423 --> 00:41:54,823
There was a little girl
that you saved.
596
00:41:54,892 --> 00:41:57,360
- A little eight-year-old girl.
- Yeah.
597
00:41:57,428 --> 00:41:59,521
Host: Then the fact
that it was a child,
598
00:41:59,597 --> 00:42:01,929
perhaps, that moved you
in some way?
599
00:42:01,999 --> 00:42:06,060
Call me old-fashioned,
but I've always had a soft spot
600
00:42:06,137 --> 00:42:08,367
for kids with guns
pointed at their heads.
601
00:42:10,041 --> 00:42:11,736
But seriously,
602
00:42:11,809 --> 00:42:14,107
you could have easily
have been killed.
603
00:42:14,178 --> 00:42:18,080
I can't tell you how many times
I've been told that,
604
00:42:18,149 --> 00:42:21,448
- but here I am.
- And here you are.
605
00:42:21,519 --> 00:42:23,783
Let's take a few questions
from the audience.
606
00:42:23,855 --> 00:42:25,482
Yes, ma'am.
607
00:42:26,557 --> 00:42:28,491
Hi, Flappy.
608
00:42:28,559 --> 00:42:30,356
Hi.
609
00:42:30,428 --> 00:42:34,228
I'm glad you killed that
worthless piece of trash.
610
00:42:36,200 --> 00:42:38,134
I didn't kill him.
611
00:42:38,202 --> 00:42:41,694
- I didn't kill him.
- You're no hero.
612
00:42:41,772 --> 00:42:44,434
Now, is there a ceiling
on how much crap
613
00:42:44,508 --> 00:42:47,238
we, as Americans, have to tolerate
from (bleep) like this?
614
00:42:48,746 --> 00:42:51,112
Also, I was wondering
615
00:42:51,182 --> 00:42:54,879
if you'd consider doing
another kind of party?
616
00:42:54,952 --> 00:42:58,945
Umm... I didn't quite catch
the first part of that question.
617
00:42:59,023 --> 00:43:02,083
And as for the latter...
I didn't get that either.
618
00:43:02,159 --> 00:43:04,593
I still do parties for kids!
619
00:43:09,066 --> 00:43:11,534
Only humans
can he heroes, right?
620
00:43:11,602 --> 00:43:14,093
Tell that
to Walt Flannigan's dog,
621
00:43:14,171 --> 00:43:16,799
a gutsy pooch who pulled
his screaming master
622
00:43:16,874 --> 00:43:18,774
from a burning
comic book store.
623
00:43:18,843 --> 00:43:21,641
That story and
other hometown heroes...
624
00:43:27,685 --> 00:43:28,879
Don't.
625
00:43:36,427 --> 00:43:37,519
Flappy.
626
00:43:38,896 --> 00:43:42,627
- May I suggest a sandwich, sir?
- You may suggest nothing.
627
00:43:42,700 --> 00:43:45,430
Please... he's a fucking party clown.
There's not too many of them.
628
00:43:45,503 --> 00:43:47,437
Now find him and get back to me.
629
00:43:47,505 --> 00:43:50,269
Jesus H. Christ, are you still
out here from last week?
630
00:43:50,341 --> 00:43:52,969
- Well, if it isn't Mr. Funny Pants.
- It's not his fault.
631
00:43:53,044 --> 00:43:54,807
There's been a horrible
wind shear all morning.
632
00:43:54,879 --> 00:43:56,870
Relax.
633
00:43:56,948 --> 00:43:58,939
Where have you been?
You're an hour late.
634
00:43:59,016 --> 00:44:00,745
Somebody's got
to secure our positions
635
00:44:00,818 --> 00:44:02,786
at the top of
the entertainment biz.
636
00:44:02,853 --> 00:44:03,785
Damn.
637
00:44:03,854 --> 00:44:05,822
You're not even fucking listening.
638
00:44:07,158 --> 00:44:08,625
All right, Marty,
what's on your mind?
639
00:44:08,693 --> 00:44:12,185
Well, Gil, how would you like
to be responsible for programming
640
00:44:12,263 --> 00:44:15,289
one of the most popular
kiddie shows of all time?
641
00:44:15,366 --> 00:44:16,765
Well, Marty, I'd love it.
642
00:44:16,834 --> 00:44:18,699
Kind of missed
my window, though.
643
00:44:18,769 --> 00:44:21,203
Sesame Street's been on
for quite some time.
644
00:44:21,272 --> 00:44:24,901
I'm talking about now,
about a new show.
645
00:44:24,976 --> 00:44:25,965
Gil?
646
00:44:27,144 --> 00:44:28,873
I'm talking about Flappy.
647
00:44:28,946 --> 00:44:30,573
- Who?
- He said Flappy.
648
00:44:30,648 --> 00:44:33,617
I know what he said.
Stand over there, please.
649
00:44:33,684 --> 00:44:36,244
You've got to tell me
what you're talking about
650
00:44:36,320 --> 00:44:40,188
- before I can give you an appraisal.
- First off, it's not a what.
651
00:44:40,257 --> 00:44:44,057
It's a who. And he's making
a big splash, Orca-style.
652
00:44:44,128 --> 00:44:46,995
It's the hero clown.
The one who saved the little girl.
653
00:44:47,064 --> 00:44:49,555
- The father and guns and everything.
- Boring.
654
00:44:49,633 --> 00:44:51,601
He's become a media darling.
655
00:44:51,669 --> 00:44:53,796
It's already transcended
the local networks.
656
00:44:53,871 --> 00:44:56,465
This guy has been on
two nationwide tabloid shows.
657
00:44:56,540 --> 00:44:58,508
And he's scheduled
for prime time tonight.
658
00:44:58,576 --> 00:45:01,511
And what did you say
his name is again?
659
00:45:01,579 --> 00:45:03,376
Flappy.
660
00:45:03,447 --> 00:45:05,381
How can you not love that?
661
00:45:05,449 --> 00:45:07,144
Not loving it.
662
00:45:07,218 --> 00:45:08,378
Fine.
663
00:45:08,452 --> 00:45:11,114
It's all right.
Just work on your...
664
00:45:11,188 --> 00:45:14,419
let me tell you about this one time
I brought this other kid's show
665
00:45:14,492 --> 00:45:16,357
- to Gil's attention.
- Hey! Hey!
666
00:45:16,427 --> 00:45:18,759
We agreed never
to bring that up again.
667
00:45:18,829 --> 00:45:20,524
Not even in jest.
668
00:45:20,598 --> 00:45:23,158
Nobody knew
that big, fat purple bastard
669
00:45:23,234 --> 00:45:25,099
would have such staying power.
670
00:45:25,169 --> 00:45:27,000
Who is this Flappy guy?
671
00:45:27,071 --> 00:45:30,700
People save kids
every day of the week.
672
00:45:30,775 --> 00:45:32,834
I heard some flea-footed dog
saved his master.
673
00:45:32,910 --> 00:45:36,573
- You want to give him a TV show too?
- People love him.
674
00:45:36,647 --> 00:45:38,444
If you're a parent and you haven't
secured him
675
00:45:38,516 --> 00:45:40,450
for your kids' party, forget it.
676
00:45:40,518 --> 00:45:42,611
You're meat.
They hate you.
677
00:45:42,686 --> 00:45:45,587
This guy's gonna be big!
I can feel it.
678
00:45:45,656 --> 00:45:47,783
That prehistoric
shitbag, dude, he's scrapnel.
679
00:45:47,858 --> 00:45:49,951
This Flappy
is prime fucking rib!
680
00:45:50,027 --> 00:45:53,292
- Strike while the iron's hot!
- All right. Listen.
681
00:45:53,364 --> 00:45:56,162
We've got two months
until our contracts are re-upped.
682
00:45:56,233 --> 00:45:58,599
- If he's still as hot then...
- Listen.
683
00:45:58,669 --> 00:46:02,230
- # I love you, you love me... #
- All right!
684
00:46:02,306 --> 00:46:05,935
All right, you pushy bastard.
Get this Flappy guy on board.
685
00:46:06,010 --> 00:46:08,069
- Yes!
- No... and I repeat...
686
00:46:08,145 --> 00:46:11,080
no long-term deal,
standard contract only.
687
00:46:11,148 --> 00:46:13,844
I'm not marrying some
wet-behind-the-ears rookie.
688
00:46:13,918 --> 00:46:15,681
Gil?
689
00:46:15,753 --> 00:46:17,983
Flappy's the word.
690
00:46:18,055 --> 00:46:20,546
# Flappy's the word,
is the word #
691
00:46:20,624 --> 00:46:22,319
- # Have you heard... #
- Marty, do you mind?
692
00:46:22,393 --> 00:46:23,325
It's cool.
693
00:46:27,531 --> 00:46:28,759
Flappy...
694
00:46:28,833 --> 00:46:30,630
you had better
have me golfing
695
00:46:30,701 --> 00:46:33,261
with some players
in Hawaii by year's end.
696
00:46:34,472 --> 00:46:36,633
He will, sir. He will.
697
00:46:36,707 --> 00:46:39,540
- The wedge!
- Wise choice, sir.
698
00:46:45,883 --> 00:46:47,748
(kno cking)
699
00:46:54,725 --> 00:46:57,250
Look, I don't know
who you're collecting for,
700
00:46:57,328 --> 00:47:00,354
but they can save a cell for me
down in debtors prison.
701
00:47:00,431 --> 00:47:01,989
Oh. Mr. Carlson.
702
00:47:02,066 --> 00:47:04,557
Hi. No,
I'm Martan Ingram.
703
00:47:04,635 --> 00:47:06,159
Jayram Television.
704
00:47:06,237 --> 00:47:08,137
You know,
out at the highlands.
705
00:47:08,205 --> 00:47:11,072
- Oh. I'm sorry. Come in.
- Thank you.
706
00:47:11,142 --> 00:47:12,666
Come in.
707
00:47:14,211 --> 00:47:16,771
You know how
those bill collectors can be,
708
00:47:16,847 --> 00:47:19,941
wanting payment on goods
and services, the nerve.
709
00:47:20,017 --> 00:47:22,508
They can be trying. Ummm...
710
00:47:22,586 --> 00:47:25,077
let me cut right to the chase.
711
00:47:25,156 --> 00:47:27,386
Have you ever done
any television before?
712
00:47:27,458 --> 00:47:29,426
A ton in the past few weeks.
713
00:47:29,493 --> 00:47:32,690
Oh, the news, but I'm talking
about before that.
714
00:47:32,763 --> 00:47:35,755
Well, once I was eating
at Ray's Ribtip Grill,
715
00:47:35,833 --> 00:47:37,630
and this old dude
smashed through the window
716
00:47:37,701 --> 00:47:40,192
and killed this retarded kid,
and they asked me for a comment
717
00:47:40,271 --> 00:47:41,465
on the 11:00 news.
718
00:47:42,540 --> 00:47:43,871
Well... l...
719
00:47:46,610 --> 00:47:49,408
I meant, have you thought
of hosting your own show?
720
00:47:49,480 --> 00:47:53,348
Well, I was trying to set up
something on cable access,
721
00:47:53,417 --> 00:47:57,979
- but air time doesn't come cheap.
- It can be pricey.
722
00:47:58,055 --> 00:48:02,185
I was thinking that l...
we, at Jayram...
723
00:48:02,259 --> 00:48:05,695
we're extremely enthusiastic
about you hosting your own show.
724
00:48:05,763 --> 00:48:07,993
Yeah, right.
Where's the camera?
725
00:48:08,065 --> 00:48:10,090
Who are you,
Allen Funt's evil twin?
726
00:48:12,469 --> 00:48:15,267
- You're serious?
- As a heart attack.
727
00:48:16,574 --> 00:48:19,668
I always wanted to say that.
You'd be syndicated,
728
00:48:19,743 --> 00:48:22,109
which means that every kid,
from Portland, Oregon
729
00:48:22,179 --> 00:48:24,807
to Portland, Maine,
would be watching your show,
730
00:48:24,882 --> 00:48:27,077
or more specifically,
you, the Flappy.
731
00:48:28,552 --> 00:48:32,454
- I don't know what to think.
- I brought a contract along,
732
00:48:32,523 --> 00:48:36,459
and it's spelled out fairly clearly.
I was hoping we could...
733
00:48:37,695 --> 00:48:38,855
jeez...
734
00:48:38,929 --> 00:48:41,124
I'm rushing you,
aren't I?
735
00:48:41,198 --> 00:48:44,031
God, I'm not even thinking
this is sudden for you.
736
00:48:45,269 --> 00:48:48,033
That's one way of putting it.
Surreal might be another.
737
00:48:48,105 --> 00:48:50,266
Why don't we do this
like real people?
738
00:48:50,341 --> 00:48:52,104
Do you want to have
dinner tonight?
739
00:48:52,176 --> 00:48:55,668
If you want, feel free
to bring your agent along.
740
00:48:55,746 --> 00:48:59,204
- That's fine with me.
- I don't exactly have an agent.
741
00:48:59,283 --> 00:49:00,910
Ooh.
742
00:49:00,985 --> 00:49:03,977
Well... if we had to,
we could wait.
743
00:49:04,054 --> 00:49:06,648
No! I mean, no.
744
00:49:06,724 --> 00:49:09,192
Why give those guys 10%?
745
00:49:09,260 --> 00:49:12,923
It's just that my car
is a bit on the fritz.
746
00:49:12,997 --> 00:49:15,522
Not a problem. We'll send
a car to pick you up.
747
00:49:15,599 --> 00:49:18,932
- 7:00?
- That would be great.
748
00:49:19,003 --> 00:49:21,130
Ummm... why, though?
749
00:49:21,205 --> 00:49:23,537
If you're partial
to public transportation,
750
00:49:23,607 --> 00:49:27,668
- by all means, take the bus.
- No, no. Why the show?
751
00:49:27,745 --> 00:49:30,680
Why me?
I know I helped a little girl...
752
00:49:30,748 --> 00:49:32,306
Helped her?
753
00:49:32,383 --> 00:49:34,908
You saved her.
754
00:49:34,985 --> 00:49:37,249
People remember
things like that.
755
00:49:39,390 --> 00:49:41,153
Have you ever heard of karma?
756
00:49:41,225 --> 00:49:44,160
- Yeah.
- Okay, then.
757
00:49:51,268 --> 00:49:53,498
Hi, Mom.
758
00:49:53,570 --> 00:49:56,038
Visiting hours are over.
You have to leave.
759
00:49:56,106 --> 00:49:58,939
The secretary said
I could drop by.
760
00:49:59,009 --> 00:50:01,671
I'm sorry I haven't been by
in a few days. I've been busy.
761
00:50:01,745 --> 00:50:04,270
- I saw you on the television.
- You did?
762
00:50:04,348 --> 00:50:06,077
That's what I'm here
to talk about.
763
00:50:06,150 --> 00:50:08,880
Of course, I was watching it
in the community room.
764
00:50:08,952 --> 00:50:11,921
I don't have a TV of my own,
like everyone else here.
765
00:50:11,989 --> 00:50:14,890
You will soon.
I have some pretty good news.
766
00:50:14,958 --> 00:50:17,290
- Sure.
- No, I do.
767
00:50:17,361 --> 00:50:20,558
Someone from one of the networks
saw what I did.
768
00:50:20,631 --> 00:50:22,929
It was a very stupid thing to do.
769
00:50:23,000 --> 00:50:25,059
Some people think that.
770
00:50:25,135 --> 00:50:27,535
It might not have been
one of my smartest moves...
771
00:50:27,604 --> 00:50:29,697
I don't know that you've
ever made a smart move
772
00:50:29,773 --> 00:50:32,071
in your whole miserable existence.
773
00:50:32,142 --> 00:50:35,305
I'm sorry about what I said.
When you talk about him...
774
00:50:35,379 --> 00:50:38,906
I didn't mean it.
I got a little mad.
775
00:50:38,982 --> 00:50:42,213
Can we forget it happened
and start fresh?
776
00:50:42,286 --> 00:50:44,379
I don't have to stand for that.
777
00:50:44,455 --> 00:50:47,356
I know. I said I'm sorry.
I didn't come here to fight.
778
00:50:47,424 --> 00:50:50,257
I came to tell you
that I got a job.
779
00:50:50,327 --> 00:50:51,851
On television!
780
00:50:51,929 --> 00:50:53,954
Television?
781
00:50:54,031 --> 00:50:57,398
They must have put you
on as a maintenance man.
782
00:50:57,468 --> 00:50:59,197
You have no skills.
783
00:50:59,269 --> 00:51:01,396
What could you be qualified for?
784
00:51:01,472 --> 00:51:05,306
I'm a clown, just like
I've always wanted to be.
785
00:51:05,376 --> 00:51:07,071
It finally worked out.
786
00:51:07,144 --> 00:51:08,941
For a while, it looked bleak,
787
00:51:09,012 --> 00:51:11,480
and I thought I might have
to give it up, but I'm glad I didn't!
788
00:51:11,548 --> 00:51:14,517
Still with the clown business?
789
00:51:14,585 --> 00:51:16,485
You'll go nowhere with that.
790
00:51:16,553 --> 00:51:20,922
I've tried to drum some sense
into that skull of yours for years...
791
00:51:20,991 --> 00:51:23,118
Mom, you're not listening.
792
00:51:23,193 --> 00:51:26,253
I have my own show,
my own regular TV show.
793
00:51:26,330 --> 00:51:29,390
It will be called, Flappy's Fun House.
794
00:51:29,466 --> 00:51:31,400
That's an absurd name.
795
00:51:31,468 --> 00:51:34,631
They thought of the name.
But it'll be pretty good.
796
00:51:34,705 --> 00:51:37,333
It has some positive messages,
and no violence.
797
00:51:37,408 --> 00:51:40,707
The idea is that it teaches
and entertains at the same time.
798
00:51:40,778 --> 00:51:43,178
What parent
in their right mind
799
00:51:43,247 --> 00:51:46,216
would let their child
watch such foolishness?
800
00:51:46,283 --> 00:51:48,581
It won't last.
Even I can see that.
801
00:51:48,652 --> 00:51:51,746
You'll end up right back
where you started.
802
00:51:51,822 --> 00:51:54,552
Seems you were born
to be a bumbling idiot.
803
00:51:55,726 --> 00:51:59,457
What is so hard
about being happy for me?
804
00:51:59,530 --> 00:52:03,523
Why can't you say anything nice?
805
00:52:03,600 --> 00:52:05,625
Why bother telling you?
806
00:52:05,702 --> 00:52:07,260
I'd just as soon
you didn't annoy me
807
00:52:07,337 --> 00:52:09,532
with such asinine fairy tales.
808
00:52:09,606 --> 00:52:12,837
- Television!
- Want me to show you the contracts?
809
00:52:12,910 --> 00:52:16,505
- What do you need? Written proof?
- Maven on the move.
810
00:52:16,580 --> 00:52:22,109
What you need to learn is what you do
is nothing more than a hobby.
811
00:52:22,186 --> 00:52:24,746
It's a job, not a hobby.
812
00:52:24,822 --> 00:52:28,280
Yes, well, you've overstayed
your welcome.
813
00:52:29,793 --> 00:52:31,693
Go on, get out!
814
00:52:31,762 --> 00:52:33,662
Bring some good news back
with you next time,
815
00:52:33,730 --> 00:52:36,130
not some bullshit
about having a real job!
816
00:52:36,200 --> 00:52:39,966
I'll believe you have a real job
the day you can walk in,
817
00:52:40,037 --> 00:52:42,562
and your hands aren't softer
than a newborn's ass.
818
00:52:42,639 --> 00:52:46,370
Out! I don't want to hear it.
You make me ill.
819
00:53:03,961 --> 00:53:06,794
Well, kids,
you won't believe this,
820
00:53:06,864 --> 00:53:09,890
but that's all the time
we have for today.
821
00:53:12,202 --> 00:53:15,069
Have no fear. We'll do it
all again tomorrow,
822
00:53:15,138 --> 00:53:18,665
with more fun and excitement
on Flappy's Fun House!
823
00:53:18,742 --> 00:53:20,607
Kids: Yeah!
824
00:53:21,678 --> 00:53:24,340
Now, I want to thank you,
825
00:53:24,414 --> 00:53:25,904
and you,
826
00:53:25,983 --> 00:53:27,507
and you,
827
00:53:27,584 --> 00:53:31,418
for helping me make
this first show a big success.
828
00:53:31,488 --> 00:53:33,718
I want you
to do what Flappy did.
829
00:53:33,790 --> 00:53:36,554
Stay in school and
take care of yourself,
830
00:53:36,627 --> 00:53:40,859
because you know what?
You're the only you you've got.
831
00:53:40,931 --> 00:53:43,456
And I'm not clowning around!
832
00:53:47,905 --> 00:53:50,965
- Woman: Excuse me.
- Marty: You are a natural.
833
00:53:51,041 --> 00:53:54,067
- You realize that, don't you?
- Hello, Flappy. Martan
834
00:53:54,144 --> 00:53:56,908
Cinnamon, get the door.
These kids, they just...
835
00:53:56,980 --> 00:53:59,813
- they love you.
- They do, don't they?
836
00:53:59,883 --> 00:54:01,817
Absolutely.
I'm no psychic friend,
837
00:54:01,885 --> 00:54:05,150
but I'll bet that within a year,
you'll be more popular
838
00:54:05,222 --> 00:54:08,589
than "It's Scotty"
and those powerful Rangers.
839
00:54:08,659 --> 00:54:11,127
- Will: Really?
- Yes.
840
00:54:14,698 --> 00:54:16,256
Fuck.
841
00:55:22,132 --> 00:55:23,929
It came, Mommy!
842
00:55:24,001 --> 00:55:26,561
- Flappy sent the video!
- So he did.
843
00:55:26,637 --> 00:55:28,969
- Want me to open it for you?
- "Want me to open it for you?"
844
00:55:29,039 --> 00:55:31,633
Would you two shut up?
I'm trying to watch a picture here.
845
00:55:31,708 --> 00:55:34,871
- Shut up, you old fool.
- Shut up, old fool.
846
00:55:34,945 --> 00:55:38,381
Hey, I don't want her
talking to me like that.
847
00:55:38,448 --> 00:55:41,383
- Can I watch it now?
- You certainly can.
848
00:55:41,451 --> 00:55:44,545
What?
I was watching something.
849
00:55:44,621 --> 00:55:46,885
Woman: I noticed.
850
00:55:46,957 --> 00:55:48,891
It's just that I don't care.
851
00:55:50,360 --> 00:55:54,729
- What? I pay the damn rent!
- Watch your English around her.
852
00:55:54,798 --> 00:55:56,561
What does that say?
Volume eight?
853
00:55:56,633 --> 00:55:59,363
Have you been buying that crap
and not telling me?
854
00:56:01,138 --> 00:56:03,538
- What is it?
- It's Flappy's Funhouse!
855
00:56:03,607 --> 00:56:05,632
I can read. What's a Flappy?
856
00:56:05,709 --> 00:56:07,700
I like and love Flappy.
857
00:56:09,646 --> 00:56:11,910
- That tells me nothing...
- Leave her alone.
858
00:56:11,982 --> 00:56:15,315
Leave me alone. He's mad
'cause Flappy's better than him.
859
00:56:15,385 --> 00:56:18,149
All right, that's it.
I'm going out with my boys.
860
00:56:18,221 --> 00:56:19,950
We're bowling tonight.
861
00:56:20,023 --> 00:56:22,651
- League champs, I might add.
- Oh, I care.
862
00:56:22,726 --> 00:56:25,320
Do they have social lives?
863
00:56:25,395 --> 00:56:26,987
I have never seen two grown men
864
00:56:27,064 --> 00:56:29,692
who'd rather hang out
with their father constantly
865
00:56:29,766 --> 00:56:33,532
instead of going on dates, or
at least attempting to meet women.
866
00:56:33,603 --> 00:56:35,696
Oh yeah?
Maybe that's what we're doing.
867
00:56:35,772 --> 00:56:38,332
- Have you considered that?
- Who in their right mind
868
00:56:38,408 --> 00:56:39,898
would be interested in you?
869
00:56:39,976 --> 00:56:42,444
I can't believe I was
for that fleeting moment.
870
00:56:42,512 --> 00:56:44,946
You know,
that front door hasn't moved.
871
00:56:48,085 --> 00:56:50,713
Look at this. A clown.
872
00:56:50,787 --> 00:56:51,879
How unique.
873
00:56:51,955 --> 00:56:54,515
No one has ever thought
of putting a clown on TV before.
874
00:56:54,591 --> 00:56:57,856
You people are so easily taken,
875
00:56:57,928 --> 00:56:59,520
especially you.
876
00:57:22,219 --> 00:57:23,777
Will's voice: My name's William,
877
00:57:23,854 --> 00:57:27,517
and I love to suck cocks.
I love...
878
00:57:27,591 --> 00:57:29,525
to suck cock.
879
00:57:30,794 --> 00:57:32,091
...for kids.
880
00:57:43,073 --> 00:57:46,167
Gee, Ed, if I had known
you were gonna develop
881
00:57:46,243 --> 00:57:47,471
such an affinity for it,
882
00:57:47,544 --> 00:57:50,206
I'd have signed you up
for his fanclub.
883
00:57:55,018 --> 00:57:57,282
- Mom!
- What's the matter, jackass?!
884
00:57:57,354 --> 00:57:59,549
He sure is one.
885
00:58:11,034 --> 00:58:14,868
I was like, " 10 grand
for a store opening?"
886
00:58:14,938 --> 00:58:16,929
I felt like
I was robbing the guy.
887
00:58:17,007 --> 00:58:19,407
I half expected him
to ask me for help trafficking
888
00:58:19,476 --> 00:58:21,501
black market babies to Mexico.
889
00:58:21,578 --> 00:58:25,014
Syd: I'd do it for 10 grand.
Which way to the border?
890
00:58:25,081 --> 00:58:27,675
I'm getting another call.
891
00:58:27,751 --> 00:58:30,777
Don't forget we're having dinner
with Phil at Raskin's tonight.
892
00:58:30,854 --> 00:58:32,981
I'll give you a call
around 8:00.
893
00:58:33,056 --> 00:58:34,819
Talk to you then.
894
00:58:34,891 --> 00:58:36,324
Hello?
895
00:58:36,393 --> 00:58:39,157
Ed:
Hello, fuckface!
896
00:58:39,229 --> 00:58:41,959
- Who is this?
- Ed: Say it isn't so.
897
00:58:42,032 --> 00:58:43,522
You've forgotten me already.
898
00:58:46,336 --> 00:58:48,770
And after we were so...
899
00:58:48,839 --> 00:58:50,466
familiar.
900
00:58:56,947 --> 00:59:00,280
- What the hell do you want?
- It's all coming back to you now?
901
00:59:00,317 --> 00:59:03,445
I thought it might.
What do I want?
902
00:59:03,520 --> 00:59:05,715
That's a good question.
903
00:59:05,789 --> 00:59:09,190
Immortality?
Legendary status?
904
00:59:09,259 --> 00:59:12,285
Wait! I've got it!
$50,000!
905
00:59:12,362 --> 00:59:16,799
For what?! Count yourself fortunate
your ass isn't in jail.
906
00:59:16,867 --> 00:59:19,597
I should have called the cops
on you, you sick fuck!
907
00:59:19,669 --> 00:59:22,001
Who the fuck do you think
you're talking to?
908
00:59:22,072 --> 00:59:25,337
I'll show them the goddamn tape.
I'll bury you!
909
00:59:25,408 --> 00:59:27,376
What tape?
910
00:59:27,444 --> 00:59:29,742
You put on a good performance
that night.
911
00:59:29,813 --> 00:59:31,781
You took off
the clown garments...
912
00:59:31,848 --> 00:59:33,577
did it all.
913
00:59:33,650 --> 00:59:36,483
The show was good.
Worth the money.
914
00:59:36,553 --> 00:59:39,181
I didn't put on any show.
You know it.
915
00:59:39,256 --> 00:59:41,781
What does your tape show?
What you did to me?
916
00:59:41,858 --> 00:59:44,725
Go ahead, shoot yourself
in the foot, by all means.
917
00:59:44,794 --> 00:59:46,819
You're trying to call my bluff.
918
00:59:46,897 --> 00:59:49,127
That's not all the tape
shows, handsome.
919
00:59:49,199 --> 00:59:51,030
It shows you getting down,
920
00:59:51,101 --> 00:59:54,161
but it seems you like talking
about what you do.
921
00:59:54,237 --> 00:59:56,899
- I don't believe you.
- That's fine.
922
00:59:56,973 --> 00:59:58,907
It's just that my boy Gino,
923
00:59:58,975 --> 01:00:02,172
if there's one thing he likes
it's fooling around with that camera,
924
01:00:02,245 --> 01:00:05,476
making little movies, editing...
925
01:00:06,549 --> 01:00:10,679
I knew it.
Give me my video.
926
01:00:11,821 --> 01:00:14,688
Now listen. You'll want
to work with me on this.
927
01:00:14,758 --> 01:00:17,022
If I show that tape
to a few people...
928
01:00:17,093 --> 01:00:20,256
the right people or the wrong people,
depending on how you look at it...
929
01:00:20,330 --> 01:00:23,128
Flappy's in for a world of trouble,
wouldn't you say?
930
01:00:23,199 --> 01:00:26,362
What assurance do I have
that this tape even exists?
931
01:00:26,436 --> 01:00:29,234
- Once you get the money, then what?
- You get the tape.
932
01:00:29,306 --> 01:00:30,364
This is the only one?
933
01:00:30,440 --> 01:00:33,773
How can I be certain another one
won't mysteriously pop up?
934
01:00:33,843 --> 01:00:36,835
- You can't be.
- Then why would I agree?
935
01:00:36,913 --> 01:00:39,143
Because you have no choice,
Mr. Fuck-face!
936
01:00:39,215 --> 01:00:41,581
Stop calling me that!
937
01:00:43,386 --> 01:00:45,149
- When?
- Tomorrow.
938
01:00:45,221 --> 01:00:47,121
How about the corner phone
at Snub and Cornwall?
939
01:00:47,190 --> 01:00:50,387
- I suggest you be there and wait.
- I want to know now.
940
01:00:50,460 --> 01:00:52,985
I'd let you know right now,
but I have my eye...
941
01:00:53,063 --> 01:00:55,258
on the most delicious
young gentleman.
942
01:00:55,332 --> 01:00:59,496
Couldn't be more than seven.
So supple at that age, so...
943
01:00:59,569 --> 01:01:01,560
goodbye, fuck-face!
944
01:01:12,148 --> 01:01:13,615
What?
945
01:01:15,885 --> 01:01:17,910
When you told me
what happened that night,
946
01:01:17,988 --> 01:01:20,548
you didn't mention a video camera.
947
01:01:20,623 --> 01:01:23,922
Think hard.
Are you sure you don't remember?
948
01:01:23,994 --> 01:01:26,087
I'm sure.
949
01:01:26,162 --> 01:01:28,323
I could barely remember
anything the next day,
950
01:01:28,398 --> 01:01:30,332
let alone a year later.
951
01:01:32,469 --> 01:01:35,097
What are the chances he would
hold on to something like that?
952
01:01:35,171 --> 01:01:37,162
I think he's bullshitting you.
953
01:01:37,240 --> 01:01:40,801
That's the thing.
I don't know.
954
01:01:40,877 --> 01:01:43,243
I'd like to believe he is...
955
01:01:44,314 --> 01:01:46,145
but I'm not sure.
956
01:01:47,384 --> 01:01:49,147
I don't think he is.
957
01:01:50,453 --> 01:01:52,614
What are you going to do?
958
01:01:52,689 --> 01:01:55,385
I'll pay him the money.
What do you think?
959
01:01:55,458 --> 01:01:57,449
- Why?
- Why?
960
01:01:57,527 --> 01:02:01,019
Take a look around you.
I worked hard to get where I am,
961
01:02:01,097 --> 01:02:02,689
and I won't let
some pissant take it away.
962
01:02:02,766 --> 01:02:06,634
- $50,000 is a lot of money.
- It's a gamble.
963
01:02:06,703 --> 01:02:08,967
I just hope
this is it after this.
964
01:02:09,039 --> 01:02:12,338
Then we can threaten him
with extortion after paying him.
965
01:02:12,409 --> 01:02:16,038
That's insane! Why should we give him
anything after what he did?!
966
01:02:16,112 --> 01:02:18,637
- "We" aren't giving him anything.
- Fine.
967
01:02:18,715 --> 01:02:21,650
Then what you should do
is use the money
968
01:02:21,718 --> 01:02:23,879
to hire somebody
to storm into his shitty house,
969
01:02:23,953 --> 01:02:27,218
beat his ass, get the video
and then we'd be done with him.
970
01:02:27,290 --> 01:02:30,054
He's a crazy old fuck.
How much of a threat can he be?
971
01:02:30,126 --> 01:02:31,093
Ed: Are these yours?
972
01:02:34,030 --> 01:02:37,522
You should never have
cut school today, young man.
973
01:02:37,600 --> 01:02:41,730
- See what happens when you're truant?
- (laughter)
974
01:02:47,177 --> 01:02:50,112
Dad, he don't look so good.
975
01:02:50,180 --> 01:02:52,410
And you do?
976
01:02:52,482 --> 01:02:55,178
- Right now, let's go!
- Dad!
977
01:02:55,251 --> 01:02:57,151
He smells like shit again.
978
01:02:57,220 --> 01:02:59,518
- I do not!
- Ed: Stop.
979
01:02:59,589 --> 01:03:03,423
Gino, do you plan
on fucking it sometime today?
980
01:03:05,028 --> 01:03:07,087
Well, I was thinking,
981
01:03:07,163 --> 01:03:10,860
since he doesn't
look so great...
982
01:03:12,168 --> 01:03:15,831
- what if I just finger-fuck it?
- Oh God.
983
01:03:15,905 --> 01:03:19,705
Dad, Gino's scared of
the little man's tiny hole.
984
01:03:22,112 --> 01:03:23,841
I wish you would, fecal freak!
985
01:03:23,913 --> 01:03:25,938
Did you ever see that movie?
986
01:03:26,015 --> 01:03:28,415
This little guy around his age...
987
01:03:28,485 --> 01:03:30,544
he's walking to school
and gets kidnapped.
988
01:03:30,620 --> 01:03:32,212
Next thing you know,
989
01:03:32,288 --> 01:03:35,018
some psychic sticks her nose
where it doesn't belong.
990
01:03:35,091 --> 01:03:36,956
In the end, the kid gets saved,
991
01:03:37,026 --> 01:03:39,460
lives to see the light
of another day.
992
01:03:39,529 --> 01:03:41,360
Damned her clairvoyant ass anyway.
993
01:03:41,431 --> 01:03:43,422
No fortuneteller will come
busting through that door
994
01:03:43,500 --> 01:03:45,627
to save your sweet little hide.
995
01:03:45,702 --> 01:03:47,636
I'll tell you what will happen.
996
01:03:47,704 --> 01:03:49,968
You will take my man-size cock
997
01:03:50,039 --> 01:03:51,904
between your pretty little lips.
998
01:03:51,975 --> 01:03:53,875
Then, it's time
to give up the ghost.
999
01:03:53,943 --> 01:03:56,309
I'm not sure you know
what that means.
1000
01:03:56,379 --> 01:03:58,779
It's pain. It's darkness...
1001
01:03:58,848 --> 01:04:00,145
forever.
1002
01:04:00,216 --> 01:04:02,184
You're gonna die,
you dainty little fuck!
1003
01:04:10,260 --> 01:04:13,559
This is how I kiss.
1004
01:04:18,501 --> 01:04:21,834
And I'm gonna kiss you all over.
1005
01:04:25,041 --> 01:04:27,601
If there was a way
to be certain...
1006
01:04:28,845 --> 01:04:32,042
You should have done
something at the time.
1007
01:04:32,115 --> 01:04:34,049
It's fucking ironic
is what it is.
1008
01:04:34,117 --> 01:04:36,950
A year ago, we could have
nailed his ass to the wall.
1009
01:04:38,388 --> 01:04:41,721
It's a little too late for
"should haves" and "could haves."
1010
01:04:43,026 --> 01:04:46,587
What I have to worry about now
is how to get the money to him
1011
01:04:46,663 --> 01:04:48,995
without any traces back to me.
1012
01:04:50,233 --> 01:04:52,793
This is unreal.
1013
01:04:52,869 --> 01:04:54,996
He's going to get away with it.
1014
01:05:06,816 --> 01:05:08,943
Clean it up.
1015
01:05:13,756 --> 01:05:17,248
- He means you too, genius.
- Go on and clean.
1016
01:05:17,327 --> 01:05:18,589
Quit it, Frankie.
1017
01:05:33,743 --> 01:05:35,108
Hello?
1018
01:05:35,178 --> 01:05:38,636
Ed: I know you have it.
You would never let me down.
1019
01:05:38,715 --> 01:05:41,309
- No.
- Your mama didn't raise no fool.
1020
01:05:41,384 --> 01:05:43,614
Cut the shit!
This ain't no tea party!
1021
01:05:43,686 --> 01:05:46,484
Feisty. Don't get wise
with me, Mr. Fuckface!
1022
01:05:46,556 --> 01:05:50,014
You're fucking with the bull.
You know where I'll stick those horns.
1023
01:05:50,093 --> 01:05:55,053
Here's the news.
You'll be looking for a '64 Skylark.
1024
01:05:55,131 --> 01:05:57,065
Damn, that was a good year.
1025
01:05:57,133 --> 01:06:00,102
My Frankie had his first piece
of dick in a car like that.
1026
01:06:00,169 --> 01:06:03,297
Anyway, pull up the back-seat
and put the case in.
1027
01:06:03,373 --> 01:06:06,035
After that,
tell that old bastard Barron
1028
01:06:06,109 --> 01:06:09,772
that's not quite what you wanted.
Can he suggest something else?
1029
01:06:09,846 --> 01:06:13,577
When he does, that's where
you'll find your end of the deal.
1030
01:06:13,650 --> 01:06:17,347
That yard has ears, boy.
So don't try pulling any slick shit.
1031
01:06:17,420 --> 01:06:19,149
Money, then the tape.
1032
01:06:19,222 --> 01:06:22,282
Anything else would be
a tragic fucking mistake.
1033
01:06:22,358 --> 01:06:23,985
Capice?
1034
01:06:25,094 --> 01:06:27,255
"Do not enter."
That's what you read.
1035
01:06:27,330 --> 01:06:28,661
Back it up.
1036
01:06:39,509 --> 01:06:42,501
Barron: Skylark?
I've got one. A '64.
1037
01:06:42,578 --> 01:06:46,070
I got to shoot straight shit with you.
She's an ugly old whore.
1038
01:06:46,149 --> 01:06:48,481
- Ain't much to look at it.
- Will: That's fine.
1039
01:06:54,791 --> 01:06:57,624
Joe-Joe, run to the pharmacy
and get me some eye douche.
1040
01:06:57,694 --> 01:07:00,458
- You do it!
- Chop! Chop!
1041
01:07:00,530 --> 01:07:02,930
Got to keep these monkeys dancing.
1042
01:07:04,000 --> 01:07:05,661
What's with the case?
Are you a stockbroker?
1043
01:07:05,735 --> 01:07:06,827
No.
1044
01:07:06,903 --> 01:07:10,805
Holy shit!
You're not in the syndicate, are you?
1045
01:07:10,873 --> 01:07:13,103
One of those La Costra Nostra?
1046
01:07:13,176 --> 01:07:15,041
You got a machine gun in there?
1047
01:07:17,180 --> 01:07:19,045
No, I sell pools.
1048
01:07:19,115 --> 01:07:21,345
- Where's the car?
- You might as well be in the mob.
1049
01:07:21,417 --> 01:07:23,544
The prices you charge ain't
nothing but a shakedown anyway.
1050
01:07:23,619 --> 01:07:25,644
I sell them,
I don't own the company.
1051
01:07:25,722 --> 01:07:27,553
I heard that before.
1052
01:07:28,991 --> 01:07:30,253
Well...
1053
01:07:31,694 --> 01:07:33,821
here she is.
What do you think?
1054
01:07:36,432 --> 01:07:38,024
Barron:
Last one in the yard.
1055
01:07:38,101 --> 01:07:39,568
At least in this yard.
1056
01:07:39,635 --> 01:07:42,968
Yo, Pops, you got a problem
with one of Tony's aftermarkets.
1057
01:07:43,039 --> 01:07:45,803
Tell him to hold his water.
I'm with a customer.
1058
01:07:45,875 --> 01:07:48,742
He said, " Go to hell and get
your wrinkled ass on the phone."
1059
01:07:50,012 --> 01:07:52,879
Kick the tires.
Look it over, do something.
1060
01:07:52,949 --> 01:07:55,008
I'll be right back.
1061
01:08:16,239 --> 01:08:18,503
So what do you think?
Want me to gift-wrap her?
1062
01:08:18,574 --> 01:08:21,372
I was hoping you could suggest
something else.
1063
01:08:21,444 --> 01:08:24,140
Listen, Mr. Pool,
I have hundreds of cars.
1064
01:08:24,213 --> 01:08:26,147
You have to tell me
what you're looking for.
1065
01:08:26,215 --> 01:08:28,706
I'm not the Kreskin of the junkyard.
1066
01:08:28,785 --> 01:08:30,753
You are Mr. Barron, right?
1067
01:08:30,820 --> 01:08:32,845
I sure as shit
ain't jolly Saint Nick.
1068
01:08:36,492 --> 01:08:37,891
Shit.
1069
01:08:37,960 --> 01:08:39,791
I'd hate to be that guy.
1070
01:08:58,014 --> 01:09:00,209
Shit!
1071
01:09:00,283 --> 01:09:01,511
Fuck!
1072
01:09:01,584 --> 01:09:03,211
Damn!
1073
01:09:07,256 --> 01:09:09,747
What I'm saying is
he fucking ripped me off!
1074
01:09:09,826 --> 01:09:11,885
There still could be a tape.
1075
01:09:11,961 --> 01:09:13,826
Why wouldn't he at least
give you a copy,
1076
01:09:13,896 --> 01:09:16,023
just to let you know
he has one?
1077
01:09:16,098 --> 01:09:18,396
I think he's full of shit.
It doesn't make sense.
1078
01:09:18,468 --> 01:09:21,403
The fact that you think this guy deals
with anything on a rational level
1079
01:09:21,471 --> 01:09:24,463
speaks volumes
of how stupid you can be!
1080
01:09:26,909 --> 01:09:29,434
I'm sorry.
I shouldn't have said that.
1081
01:09:30,713 --> 01:09:33,375
I know you're not used to me
being the voice of reason,
1082
01:09:33,449 --> 01:09:35,440
but you have to do something.
1083
01:09:35,518 --> 01:09:38,248
You gave him a chance,
you didn't get the tape.
1084
01:09:38,321 --> 01:09:40,152
You don't want to hear this,
1085
01:09:40,223 --> 01:09:43,488
- but you should go to the cops.
- Let's get something straight.
1086
01:09:43,559 --> 01:09:45,584
Calling the cops
is not an option.
1087
01:09:45,661 --> 01:09:47,891
Not until I decide it is.
1088
01:09:47,964 --> 01:09:51,161
He won't go away by himself.
You haven't given him a reason.
1089
01:09:52,602 --> 01:09:54,229
I know.
1090
01:09:55,872 --> 01:09:57,863
I'll be right back.
1091
01:10:05,515 --> 01:10:07,710
- Will: Hey!
- Ed: Shitting with the common man?
1092
01:10:07,783 --> 01:10:10,013
I thought they built a throne
for your golden asshole?
1093
01:10:10,086 --> 01:10:12,486
- What do you want?
- An autograph!
1094
01:10:12,555 --> 01:10:15,319
We got your money.
We spent some already.
1095
01:10:15,391 --> 01:10:19,725
We were talking over dinner
on how you were a sweet boy,
1096
01:10:19,795 --> 01:10:22,059
so beautiful
before the consummation.
1097
01:10:22,131 --> 01:10:25,328
So here's what's what:
We want an encore performance,
1098
01:10:25,401 --> 01:10:28,029
- where you get fucked hard.
- Fuck this shit!
1099
01:10:28,104 --> 01:10:31,403
Easy. I wouldn't recommend
declining the invite.
1100
01:10:31,474 --> 01:10:34,409
If I show that tape, you go back
to being a party whore.
1101
01:10:34,477 --> 01:10:37,412
You don't show up, you get fucked
in more ways than one.
1102
01:10:37,480 --> 01:10:40,108
I want to taste you again.
1103
01:10:40,182 --> 01:10:42,673
- Get your hands off me!
- Oooh...
1104
01:10:42,752 --> 01:10:46,153
that's how I like it.
I'll be in touch, Vulgar...
1105
01:10:47,323 --> 01:10:52,056
to let you know about the party.
Make sure your tits hang out.
1106
01:10:52,128 --> 01:10:53,789
If you don't follow my rules,
1107
01:10:53,863 --> 01:10:57,162
people might see things that could get
a corn-holer like yourself
1108
01:10:57,233 --> 01:10:59,758
into some pretty hot water.
1109
01:10:59,835 --> 01:11:02,099
I'm going to fuck you again!
1110
01:11:22,792 --> 01:11:25,226
Syd:
Shit! What happened?
1111
01:11:25,294 --> 01:11:26,921
What happened?
1112
01:11:26,996 --> 01:11:28,463
He was waiting
for me in the bathroom.
1113
01:11:28,531 --> 01:11:29,691
Shit!
1114
01:11:29,765 --> 01:11:32,529
- Syd: Did you call security?
- They're gone.
1115
01:11:32,602 --> 01:11:33,967
Fuck.
1116
01:11:34,036 --> 01:11:35,697
What did he say?
1117
01:11:35,771 --> 01:11:37,238
He said...
1118
01:11:39,508 --> 01:11:42,204
he said he wants us
to kill him.
1119
01:11:49,352 --> 01:11:51,320
Hey, man!
1120
01:11:51,387 --> 01:11:54,481
- Have you seen my shirt?
- You're wearing a shirt.
1121
01:11:54,557 --> 01:11:56,286
Get back inside.
1122
01:11:57,360 --> 01:12:00,887
Good to see you. Haven't been down
at the car wash in a while.
1123
01:12:00,963 --> 01:12:02,487
You know that tall jigger Lamont,
1124
01:12:02,565 --> 01:12:04,396
started working there
about a month ago?
1125
01:12:04,467 --> 01:12:06,765
No. Can we go inside?
1126
01:12:06,836 --> 01:12:10,033
He's this big jerk-off claims
I owe him 20 bucks.
1127
01:12:10,106 --> 01:12:11,664
"Fuck that shit," I said.
1128
01:12:11,741 --> 01:12:14,209
That's when... bam!...
he hits me in the mouth!
1129
01:12:14,276 --> 01:12:16,471
Like I said, he's pretty tall,
1130
01:12:16,545 --> 01:12:20,379
so I'm going to stay away
till he cools down.
1131
01:12:20,449 --> 01:12:22,007
Sounds like a good idea.
1132
01:12:22,084 --> 01:12:23,881
Yeah, Lamont, he's...
1133
01:12:23,953 --> 01:12:28,253
as tall as Jay James, but he's got
the muscles of James, Sr.
1134
01:12:28,324 --> 01:12:31,088
He walks around
like he owns the place,
1135
01:12:31,160 --> 01:12:34,425
slapping people in the mouth,
taking people's jumpsuits.
1136
01:12:34,497 --> 01:12:37,466
I fucking hate it
when that fuck's there.
1137
01:12:37,533 --> 01:12:39,763
Anybody around?
1138
01:12:47,009 --> 01:12:48,977
Don't mind the mess.
1139
01:12:49,045 --> 01:12:50,740
Hey, boy.
1140
01:12:52,014 --> 01:12:53,675
This is Larry.
1141
01:12:53,749 --> 01:12:55,842
I'm thinking of changing it
to something else.
1142
01:12:55,918 --> 01:12:58,352
That name reminds me
too much of Lamont.
1143
01:12:58,421 --> 01:13:01,413
- If only you were Lamont.
- Tuott.
1144
01:13:01,490 --> 01:13:02,821
Sorry.
1145
01:13:02,892 --> 01:13:04,917
Can you give me
a hand over here?
1146
01:13:08,731 --> 01:13:10,756
Can you believe I found this?
1147
01:13:10,833 --> 01:13:14,325
Right near the garbage
just waiting for pick-up day.
1148
01:13:15,671 --> 01:13:19,163
Between you and me,
I found it in some guy's garage.
1149
01:13:19,241 --> 01:13:21,266
I'm sure he would have
thrown them out.
1150
01:13:21,343 --> 01:13:23,243
What an idiot.
1151
01:13:23,312 --> 01:13:26,304
These two
don't have any bullets.
1152
01:13:26,382 --> 01:13:28,043
That's a BB gun.
1153
01:13:28,117 --> 01:13:29,084
Oh.
1154
01:13:29,151 --> 01:13:32,552
These two do have bullets.
1155
01:13:32,621 --> 01:13:35,351
And they come with these things
that go on the end.
1156
01:13:35,424 --> 01:13:37,415
- Silencers?
- Yeah.
1157
01:13:37,493 --> 01:13:39,586
They make the gunshots, uh...
1158
01:13:39,662 --> 01:13:41,960
My friend told me that.
1159
01:13:42,031 --> 01:13:45,831
He said it's good because
they don't have serial numbers.
1160
01:13:45,901 --> 01:13:47,960
You need any skag?
1161
01:13:48,037 --> 01:13:49,561
No, I'm good.
1162
01:13:49,638 --> 01:13:51,970
(mo to r running)
1163
01:13:55,411 --> 01:13:57,641
Will: Do you feel like
you're going to throw up?
1164
01:13:57,713 --> 01:14:00,011
I do.
1165
01:14:00,082 --> 01:14:02,573
Where did you get this car?
Whose is it?
1166
01:14:02,651 --> 01:14:05,848
Would you calm down?
You're making me nervous.
1167
01:14:05,921 --> 01:14:09,015
I bought it for cash.
It's untraceable.
1168
01:14:09,091 --> 01:14:12,185
One of Tuott's associates
helped me a little.
1169
01:14:12,261 --> 01:14:14,525
Will: I can't believe
so much of our faith
1170
01:14:14,597 --> 01:14:16,861
is placed in an arch-junkie.
1171
01:14:16,932 --> 01:14:19,526
We wouldn't have gotten this far
if it weren't for him.
1172
01:14:19,602 --> 01:14:21,627
Will:
Thank God for Tuott.
1173
01:14:22,872 --> 01:14:25,705
I want to be certain of one thing.
1174
01:14:25,775 --> 01:14:27,572
Are you still 100% on this?
1175
01:14:27,643 --> 01:14:30,476
Yes. I told you that already.
1176
01:14:30,546 --> 01:14:33,106
I'm not going in there
to have you pussy on me.
1177
01:14:33,182 --> 01:14:36,345
- We have to be in and out.
- I know.
1178
01:14:36,418 --> 01:14:39,581
The longer we stay, the better chance
we have of getting caught.
1179
01:14:39,655 --> 01:14:41,816
And if we get caught,
we go to jail.
1180
01:14:41,891 --> 01:14:43,882
And what they did to you
will seem like
1181
01:14:43,959 --> 01:14:46,257
a church social compared to
what goes on in prison.
1182
01:14:46,328 --> 01:14:48,353
You've never even gotten
a speeding ticket.
1183
01:14:48,430 --> 01:14:49,863
How would you know?
1184
01:14:49,932 --> 01:14:52,901
Did you ever see "Caged Heat"?
It is the same thing,
1185
01:14:52,968 --> 01:14:55,835
except totally different,
because you're with guys.
1186
01:14:58,541 --> 01:15:01,305
- Got some coffee change?
- Sure don't.
1187
01:15:01,377 --> 01:15:04,574
Come on, just a quarter.
It won't break your bank.
1188
01:15:04,647 --> 01:15:06,945
Bum:
Fuck you, tightfist!
1189
01:15:09,985 --> 01:15:12,180
My legs feel like rubber.
1190
01:15:12,254 --> 01:15:14,654
Maybe they thought
we called the cops.
1191
01:15:14,723 --> 01:15:17,487
- I doubt they're even in there.
- They're in there.
1192
01:15:17,560 --> 01:15:20,688
- I'm scared.
- So am I.
1193
01:15:20,763 --> 01:15:24,631
All right. Just walk in,
do what you have to do...
1194
01:15:24,700 --> 01:15:27,533
in and out. Can't be
any more dramatic than that.
1195
01:15:27,603 --> 01:15:31,198
- I'll be right behind you.
- I sure hope so.
1196
01:15:47,556 --> 01:15:49,251
Hold on.
1197
01:15:49,325 --> 01:15:51,122
Is it him, Dad?
1198
01:15:51,193 --> 01:15:53,559
- Please God, let it be him.
- Ed: Hold on.
1199
01:15:57,666 --> 01:16:01,227
Gentlemen,
the hole has arrived.
1200
01:16:03,572 --> 01:16:05,972
- Frankie: Woo-hoo!
- Calm down!
1201
01:16:06,041 --> 01:16:07,736
Don't go blowing
your loads yet.
1202
01:16:10,312 --> 01:16:12,780
Boom-boom, in and out.
1203
01:16:19,855 --> 01:16:22,483
- Ed: Are you alone?
- What do you think?
1204
01:16:25,160 --> 01:16:27,458
Get your candy ass
in here, then!
1205
01:16:35,571 --> 01:16:38,131
You must think your shit
smells like a spring rain.
1206
01:16:38,207 --> 01:16:40,266
Walk right by me
like I wasn't a person.
1207
01:16:40,342 --> 01:16:43,277
Next time I ask you a question,
answer me.
1208
01:16:43,345 --> 01:16:45,245
- Got it?
- Yeah.
1209
01:16:49,585 --> 01:16:52,179
It's mine now, motherfucker!
1210
01:16:56,659 --> 01:17:00,117
What do we have here, huh?
1211
01:17:00,195 --> 01:17:03,426
Look at you
and all your finery.
1212
01:17:03,499 --> 01:17:06,195
Isn't he easy on the eyes?
1213
01:17:06,268 --> 01:17:09,465
Not really, Pop.
1214
01:17:13,175 --> 01:17:15,268
Give me a hand, buttercup.
1215
01:17:15,344 --> 01:17:17,904
Let me lead you on a trip
down on memory lane.
1216
01:17:17,980 --> 01:17:20,107
Do him like
you did last time, Dad.
1217
01:17:20,182 --> 01:17:22,650
Frankie: Gino, last time,
Daddy had him...
1218
01:17:22,718 --> 01:17:27,280
- I know, because I was there.
- No, you weren't, liar!
1219
01:17:27,356 --> 01:17:30,018
You're such an idiot!
You know what I'm going to do?
1220
01:17:30,092 --> 01:17:32,424
I'll take you
to court for slander.
1221
01:17:32,494 --> 01:17:36,692
- You're a law-breaking freak.
- Frankie: What are you talking about?
1222
01:17:40,436 --> 01:17:42,529
Shut up!
You're scaring him!
1223
01:17:49,812 --> 01:17:52,406
Show us what you got hiding
under there.
1224
01:18:03,392 --> 01:18:06,884
- Gino, are you getting this?
- Yes. I'm not stupid.
1225
01:18:07,963 --> 01:18:09,931
A little more.
1226
01:18:19,441 --> 01:18:21,272
Shut that goddamn thing off!
1227
01:18:22,978 --> 01:18:26,072
I think somebody was fuzzy
with the instructions.
1228
01:18:26,148 --> 01:18:28,139
What were you thinking
when you got dressed?
1229
01:18:28,217 --> 01:18:30,242
You're here for me tonight.
1230
01:18:30,319 --> 01:18:34,119
Did that slip by you?
Are you brain damaged?
1231
01:18:36,392 --> 01:18:39,418
Turn it on. Don't miss
one second of this.
1232
01:18:39,495 --> 01:18:41,690
High and hard until we beat
the shit out of him.
1233
01:18:41,764 --> 01:18:44,528
High and hard. No other way
with a fuck like this.
1234
01:18:44,600 --> 01:18:45,862
Ed: You treat him...
1235
01:18:46,835 --> 01:18:48,564
- Gino: Don't shoot.
- (gun clicks)
1236
01:18:48,637 --> 01:18:50,662
Gino: We're sorry.
1237
01:18:50,739 --> 01:18:52,229
Oh God.
1238
01:18:54,076 --> 01:18:55,634
Is that the game
we're playing?
1239
01:18:55,711 --> 01:18:58,236
You try to kill my boys,
my flesh and blood?
1240
01:18:58,313 --> 01:19:01,441
As it stands, you've got the hardest
night of your life ahead of you.
1241
01:19:01,517 --> 01:19:03,883
I hope you watched
the sun rise this morning,
1242
01:19:03,952 --> 01:19:06,386
- 'cause it was your last chance.
- Suck it!
1243
01:19:06,455 --> 01:19:07,547
Want me to shoot him?
1244
01:19:07,623 --> 01:19:09,420
Let me fucking shoot him,
Daddy!
1245
01:19:09,491 --> 01:19:12,460
How does it feel?
You know what's coming?
1246
01:19:13,629 --> 01:19:16,792
Don't fool with that thing.
Dad, tell him to put it down.
1247
01:19:16,865 --> 01:19:18,833
Shut up, chicken-shit!
1248
01:19:18,901 --> 01:19:21,563
Cut it out!
Dad, he's gonna hurt somebody.
1249
01:19:21,637 --> 01:19:24,470
Ed: Frankie, listen to your brother
and put the gun away!
1250
01:19:28,744 --> 01:19:30,405
Frankie?
1251
01:19:31,480 --> 01:19:32,538
Frankie?
1252
01:19:32,614 --> 01:19:34,445
Frankie!
You'll be all right.
1253
01:19:34,516 --> 01:19:36,108
Just a couple
of stitches you'll need.
1254
01:19:37,186 --> 01:19:39,086
Frankie.
1255
01:19:39,154 --> 01:19:41,088
Listen to your dad!
1256
01:19:41,156 --> 01:19:43,624
Why did you do that
to my brother?
1257
01:19:45,094 --> 01:19:48,325
My brother!
You fucking, fuckhead!
1258
01:19:48,397 --> 01:19:49,625
You fucking pervert!
1259
01:19:53,669 --> 01:19:54,829
(kno cking)
1260
01:19:54,903 --> 01:19:56,996
Bum: I got your man.
I want some money!
1261
01:20:04,780 --> 01:20:07,340
Syd, get up!
1262
01:20:07,416 --> 01:20:09,111
I fucked up.
We're going to get caught.
1263
01:20:09,184 --> 01:20:11,744
- What were we thinking?
- Stop it. You didn't fuck up.
1264
01:20:11,820 --> 01:20:15,415
- Yes, I did!
- You didn't! We won't get caught!
1265
01:20:20,562 --> 01:20:24,123
Get into the car and
out of here, all right?
1266
01:20:24,199 --> 01:20:26,394
- Get out of here!
- What about you?
1267
01:20:26,468 --> 01:20:29,562
I'll meet you back
at the house. Go!
1268
01:21:19,188 --> 01:21:20,746
All right.
You caught me.
1269
01:21:20,822 --> 01:21:22,653
Now what are you gonna do?
Shoot me?
1270
01:21:22,724 --> 01:21:25,693
Go ahead,
you piece of shit. Do it.
1271
01:21:25,761 --> 01:21:28,924
It doesn't matter anyway.
You're finished, fuck-face!
1272
01:21:28,997 --> 01:21:30,931
Finished!
You're a murderer now.
1273
01:21:30,999 --> 01:21:34,457
You killed my boys.
You're going to prison. I have proof.
1274
01:21:35,537 --> 01:21:37,801
You don't have it
in you anyway.
1275
01:21:39,808 --> 01:21:42,402
You're shaking.
Even in this light I can see it.
1276
01:21:42,477 --> 01:21:45,344
You're scared.
Just lie down and take it.
1277
01:21:45,414 --> 01:21:47,541
I know you haven't got the guts.
1278
01:21:47,616 --> 01:21:48,981
So do you.
1279
01:21:54,656 --> 01:21:56,419
Not like this.
1280
01:21:56,491 --> 01:21:59,051
By this fuck.
1281
01:22:03,031 --> 01:22:05,625
Goddamn you, fuck-face!
1282
01:22:58,153 --> 01:23:00,280
Fuck you!
1283
01:23:33,455 --> 01:23:35,923
Kids: Flappy! Flappy!
1284
01:23:40,595 --> 01:23:42,790
Get down!
1285
01:23:59,414 --> 01:24:03,407
Well, once again,
injustice KO'd by Flappy,
1286
01:24:03,485 --> 01:24:08,149
of Flappy Funhouse fame
and our Special Girl Friday, Bella.
1287
01:24:08,223 --> 01:24:11,351
- Let's have a big round of applause!
- (kids cheer and applaud)
1288
01:24:11,426 --> 01:24:14,452
And let's have a bigger round
of good-natured boos
1289
01:24:14,529 --> 01:24:16,690
for our purveyors of
quite a bit of nastiness
1290
01:24:16,765 --> 01:24:18,392
around Flappy's Funhouse.
1291
01:24:18,467 --> 01:24:20,833
Our criminal clown brigade!
1292
01:24:25,674 --> 01:24:27,972
- Thanks, Bella.
- Ow!
1293
01:24:29,911 --> 01:24:33,210
Now, that's all the time
we have for today, kids.
1294
01:24:35,684 --> 01:24:38,414
Don't be like these guys.
Stay in school,
1295
01:24:38,487 --> 01:24:41,854
and take care of yourselves.
'Cause you know what?
1296
01:24:41,923 --> 01:24:45,324
Kids: You're the only you
you've got.
1297
01:24:45,394 --> 01:24:47,885
And I'm not clowning around.
1298
01:24:53,735 --> 01:24:56,761
# Kids, don't feel down,
'cause guess who's in town? #
1299
01:24:56,838 --> 01:24:59,739
# You know who's around?
Flappy the clown #
1300
01:24:59,808 --> 01:25:02,641
# If you feel blue,
he'll smile for you #
1301
01:25:02,711 --> 01:25:05,646
# He knows what to do,
flappin' at you #
1302
01:25:05,714 --> 01:25:08,615
# When you're not sure
if you'll see the light of day #
1303
01:25:08,683 --> 01:25:12,585
# He'll make you smile and play
with you, he does it every day #
1304
01:25:12,654 --> 01:25:15,919
# Hey! Kids, don't feel down,
'cause guess who's in town? #
1305
01:25:15,991 --> 01:25:19,483
# You know who's around?
Flappy the clown #
1306
01:25:44,152 --> 01:25:47,053
# Kids, don't feel down,
'cause guess who's in town? #
1307
01:25:47,122 --> 01:25:50,182
# You know who's around?
Flappy the clown #
1308
01:25:50,258 --> 01:25:53,056
# If you feel blue
he'll smile for you #
1309
01:25:53,128 --> 01:25:56,029
# He knows what to do,
flappin' at you #
1310
01:25:56,097 --> 01:25:59,191
# When you're not sure
if you'll see the light of day #
1311
01:25:59,267 --> 01:26:02,634
# He'll make you smile and play
with you, he does it every day #
1312
01:26:04,506 --> 01:26:06,133
# Hey! #
1313
01:26:12,547 --> 01:26:15,448
# Kids, don't feel down,
guess who's in town? #
1314
01:26:15,517 --> 01:26:18,850
# You know who's around?
Flappy the clown #
1315
01:26:18,920 --> 01:26:21,252
# If you feel blue,
he'll smile for you #
1316
01:26:21,323 --> 01:26:24,520
# He knows what to do,
flappin' at you #
1317
01:26:24,593 --> 01:26:27,562
# So when you're not sure
if you'll see the light of day #
1318
01:26:27,629 --> 01:26:32,760
# He'll make you smile and play
with you, he does it every day #
1319
01:26:32,834 --> 01:26:36,326
# Hey! Kids, don't feel down,
'cause guess who's in town? #
1320
01:26:36,404 --> 01:26:39,635
# You know who's around?
Flappy the clown #
1321
01:26:50,552 --> 01:26:53,851
# Hey! Kids don't feel down,
'cause guess who's in town? #
1322
01:26:53,922 --> 01:26:57,722
# You know who's around?
Flappy the clown. #
102483