Original subtitles

Yes!

Two Days Ago

With this, you'll instantly be a better chef, and your husband will want to come home early.

Look closely;

dicing onions, slicing onions,

it's great for your health and you'll look fabulous.

In 3 days you'll look like Cleopatra, in a week, like Kiyokawa Nigiko.

You can really keep your family healthy with this.

You, young lad!

Yes you, the one looking all lonely.

This is also perfect for someone unhealthy looking like you. Here, take a look.

Come on, just for a bit. Take a look!

Here we go, just take a look at that cutting action!

With this slicer you can make all the difficult cuts that the professionals can.

Just look at the smoothness of that surface!

Look at that!

This can be had for just 3800 yen, can you believe it?

There just isn't another kitchen implement that can do so much.

Now all you need to do is buy it and see the results for yourself. How about it?

It's amazing.

But...

But?

I'm not sure I'll use it.

Then give it to your parents. They'll love it.

But I need the money for games....

Your body's become weak playing too many games, and you're shaming your family.

Whether you choose is up to you. What do you say? Your body's become weak playing too many games, and you're shaming your family.

Whether you choose is up to you. What do you say?

(Buy it, buy it. You should buy it. Your family will be happy. Buy it.)

Yaman, you vile creature plagueing our world, (Buy it, buy it. You should buy it. Your family will be happy. Buy it.)

Yaman, you vile creature plagueing our world,

let me give you some of my treatment!

Mina-Kick!

Did you see that!

Matsunaga-san, you're drooling man.

Episode 17, and we finally get to see Mina's punch.

And that exquisite glimpse of her panties.

I'm loosing faith in the production staff myself; they've reached their limits.

I hope I've got it all properly recorded at home.

Matsunaga, you shouldn't be so into a production with such mediocre levels.

None of my friends think that, Kawamoto-shi!

And that just makes it worse.

Sorry I'm late.

Yamada-shi, you're late. What happened?

I got sidetracked.

So what kind of evils did we give into today?

A slicer, one of new electric shavers,

and also some animation software.

Uhh, and...

this is...

Our chairman's amazing isn't he? Usually a company party-

He just wants to show off a little.

It looks like everyone's trying to show off today!

You're pretty dressed up yourself, Yuuko.

Do you really think so? I didn't realize!

Hey. Do you really think so? I didn't realize!

Hey.

Just because you're young doesn't-

Oh my gosh.

What, where?

There.

Ok, I'm going to show you what it means to be experienced. You just watch.

Where's Saori?

Probably drawing the attention of men all around her.

Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry!

That's stale.

So Karin, what do you wear when you go to sleep?

Umm...I sleep at night in a pajama.

A pajama! Ok, and what color is this pajama?

I've recently bought a pink one.

Pink. Just imagine it folks, pink!

Hey, what are you doing?

I'm copying every word, like it says in the magazines.

And where do you wash yourself first in a bath?

Come on, tell us.

I wash my neck first.

What are you doing?

If I'm going to be listening to Mina's voice, then I have to be looking at her too.

Right?

Ok folks, this is what you've been waiting for, picture time!!

From when I say so, you have 1 minute.

Start!!

Look here, look here!

Karin's smile, you have 1 minute to capture her smile.

Your ankles, show me your ankles!

Mina, let me see your ankles.

More of your ankles. Please.

Sir, you have to be seated, stay seated.

I'm properly seated. See look.

Just barely!

Your ankles.

Let's capture that smile.

What is it?

Why is it you're smiling so much?

Maybe you knew I was there.

Nope. I was thinking about when Prince and Princess will meet again in the Milkyway.

You're so naturally pretty, it's cute.

A one minute photography session. They're so mean.

Yeah, I wanted at least a minute and a half.

Does 30 seconds make a difference?

It's totally different; with a minute and a half your subject will look at you twice.

That way you can get the pose that you want.

Now I get it.

Gentlemen, would you like to write your wishes for this year?

Oh yeah, it's almost...

time for Tanabata.

So that at least some of your wishes may come true,

I pledge to work ever harder to meet your needs.

What is it?

I don't know what Tanabata is.

It's about these two lovers, Princess Orihime and Prince Hikoboshi who

insult and beat up each other, then use robots to try to end it.

But deep in their hearts

they really loved each other. That why each year,

they meet in the Milkyway, and go crazy trying to kill each other. It's total murderous madness in the heavens!

In the end they throw tons of modified super missile punches at each other. And then it ends.

It's a nice story.

Isn't it?

And now, I'd like to give you all a present to express my gratitude.

Please join me now on the deck.

So what are you wishing for this year?

Me? Let's see...

Probably...

Mina in a movie. What else is there?

There's no way that's happening. Wish for something realistic.

And you? What do you want Kawamoto-shi?

Another season of Mina.

So you DO like Mina!

Well personally I think...that is to say...

So how about you, Yamada, what are you wishing for? Well personally I think...that is to say...

So how about you, Yamada, what are you wishing for?

For me...

I'd like to get transfered to a different division at work.

That's not the type of thing you're supposed to wish for.

That's true.

So ladies and gentlemen, if you could all join me in the countdown.

_10_

_9_

_8_

_7_

_6_

It's a serious issue for me.

To continue working in sales when I'm no good at it.

_3_

_2_

_1_

It really feels like summer.

Of course it does, it's already July.

The Train Man

I mostly get excited about ankles.

Just imagining Mina's ankles I-

Please don't. I only think about Mina for one thing.

Yeah, that face and at her age, she's a gift from the gods.

And Yamada-shi, what about you?

I'm...

a fan of her soft full lips.

Did you see yesterday's Robot Wars?

Of course. With that scene with Corporal Tsubaki in the cockpit.

Me too, I loved that scene.

See you tomorrow then.

Ok, good night.

Good night.

[There will be a short wait until the next train departs due to a change in schedule]

You can leave my stuff alone.

But-

I said, don't touch anything!

Ok.

Um, um.

What!

This brush, it's yours isn't it?

Please.

Yes...

That woman in front of us, do you think she's a model?

I thought so too. She's so pretty.

Isn't she? She's georgous.

Hehe. Old man, old man.

You've got a middle aged stink, you stupid.

Bastards gotta make these doors automatic.

Why is it in the summer, they won't put eggs on beef bowls when you're taking out?

They should give us a discount.

You, what are you doing ringing that phone for?

I wasn't-

Don't talk back at me you punk!

Now tell me where Japan's fastest roller coaster is!

I don't know, I don't know.

You don't know? It's Fuji Q's Keroppa. The Keroppa, you hear?

It's Udonppa you idiot. Hehehe.

What, who was that laughing over there?

You there, was it you?

Smokers like me are hated now. Do you know what it's like?

Do you?

I'm getting angry here!

It might be wrong, but, but I'm going to have me a smoke.

And you know what? I'm going to finish smoking this too.

Absolutely terrible. If only someone-

What was that? The bunch of you were insulting me weren't you?

We didn't say anything-

Shudup!

Now that they have dryers with washing machines, you women think you can play around all day huh?

Buying your way out everything! The world doesn't work that way!

Hey girl.

You're a real pretty one aincha?

Hey. So how about petting my little guy here. Yeah, pet it.

If you don't want to give it a rub here, we can go to a nice massage parlour together.

How about it? You don't mind do you?

Come on, baby, come on.

Stop it, please.

Stop it? I haven't done anything yet.

I know what it is; you probably think my thing's small don't you?

I can't have you thinking that. I might be short, but my bad boy's bigger than you'd think.

Let me show you. Here, take a look.

Stop it!

Say what?

What is it?

Ssstop it. I'm telling you to stop.

What d'ya think you're trying to do kid?

Can't you tell she doesn't like what you're doing?

What the &*%$! You think you think- How old you think you are eh?

Bastard... Just 'cause you're young, don't think you can- Ow, ow, ow...

It's a shame acting like this as an adult.

Let me go, darn it! Let me go!

Ow, ow. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I just got a bit drunk, that's all.

Is this the person who was causing the trouble? Ow, ow. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I just got a bit drunk, that's all.

Is this the person who was causing the trouble?

Yes.

Ok, let's go.

I can walk by myself. Leave me alone.

You've really drunk too much.

Are you alright?

You've got a nosebleed.

That Sariman was so cool.

And I look so lame.

And then he came our way. You wouldn't believe it. He was all dryer this, petting that. Oh my...

The things certain people say...

Thank you so much for your help.

Not at all. Thank you so much for your help.

Not at all.

I was wondering. Wouldn't you give me your address? I'd like to thank you somehow.

It's really ok, I couldn't.

It'll make me feel better. Here, you can write it in this.

Umm. Would you mind giving me your address too?

Please?

Yes, ok.

Sorry.

It's ok.

You can see that lame otaku-fashion coming from 100 meters off.

Stop dressing like that.

You're disturbing the neighborhood just being here.

He's SO irritating.

Use this.

Really?

Oh, Mother's at a reunion, and is going to be late.

Huh? Something about that boy is so irritating.

I got asked my address. Hehe.

"Rant thread for single men"

Hello. I've always just lurked on this forum, but today I have some news to tell you about.

I was at an anime event in Akihabara today, and on the way back home an old drunk started harrassing the other passengers on the train.

Send

It was looking pretty ugly, so I worked up the courage and yelled "Stop it".

My voice was probably shaking. I'd never been in a fight before.

In the end, this sarariman came and helped me. That riman was so cool, and I looked so lame.

After that, I had to go to the police to write my statement.

After the older lady asked me for my address, the younger one asked me too.

I totally panicked. Even before the drunk came, I'd noticed how pretty she was.

Hey! Come on out! If you don't come out, I'm adding some more bruises!

I realized it later, but I wonder why I didn't get her contact info from her.

It was the first time I'd ever been thanked by a girl. I was so nervous.

If you gave her your address, she'll send you a present. That's what I think.

It was brave of you to stand up against a drunk. Good job.

So you got on some girl's address book, big deal.

What where the specs on the young one?

Probably around 25. She seemed older than me. Longish dark hair, and she had a slender body.

Her skin was fair, and she was so sweet and pretty looking.

I'm jealous that you even able to talk to a girl like that.

She lives in a different world from ours.

I'd say it's hopeless.

For my sake, I'm hoping this'll have a boring end.

I'm interested in what happens after this.

She'll forget all about any gifts by tomorrow.

An applause for our brave member. I await further developments.

Olay, olay!

The older lady was probably just asking for your address out of courtesy. I wouldn't expect much.

I gift. Oh man...

No way, no way. It's not going to happen. I can't get my hopes up.

Uhh, I didn't get a wink of sleep last night.

We'll be making stops at: Tsudanuma, Funabashi, Ichikawa, Shinkoiwa, Kinnshicho, Bakurocho, Shinnihonbashi, and Tokyo. Right, clear, Left clear-Hey!

You're late! What were you doing?

This door doesn't open.

This door can't be openned using the key for the jail.

You have to look for a golden key in the tower of light. I suggest you go back and look for it.

Inagi, Tsudanuma, Funabashi, Ichikawa...

Saori!

Morning. Good Morning.

Yesterday I saw this really weird dream. You were in it, and you were singing. No way! Really.

We're a placement agency here. What are you doing if you can't get our people jobs?!

Yamada!

You're looking tired, but did you spend all night looking for campanies?

Care to tell us your results?

There were no new companies last week.

Then all you're doing is maintaining the single contract the guy before you got!

I'm sorry sir.

What are you doing at our meeting then? Get out there and find us some clients.

Right now?

Now.

Yes, yes sir.

Ok, next Tanaka.

I got two placements at Shakai Shuuji in the system development division.

Marveleous Tanaka, marvelous. I'll give you a kiss later.

Hmm. This so good.

Oh that's right. Saori, I need you to come with me later to buy a new powder brush.

Sure.

You wouldn't believe this one annoying guy I met yesteday.

But did you have to throw it out right in front of him?

I'm serious, if it was you, you would have thrown it at him.

I mean there was all this dust, and moldy candy all over it.

I don't see how so much could stick on it in that short a time.

I guess that's the power of otaku magic!

Excuse me, but could you stop feeding the pigeons?

I'm sorry.

But you know, there are girls that like guys like them. It sort of stirrs a maturnal instinct in them.

No way!! Right Saori?

Hm? I like it.

What??

This lunch, it's good.

Oh, the lunch. I was worried there.

Excuse me, but I believe we talked on the phone just now.

I heard you had a problem with one of our people?

A problem. Yeah, I guess it's a problem.

Was it a mistake of some kind?

Not exactly.

There's a rumour going around that one of your female staff is seeing our Personnel Managaer.

Seeing? There's a rumour going around that one of your female staff is seeing our Personnel Managaer.

Seeing?

Yeah, they were shacking up.

Oh. They were shacking up.

So yeah, I wanted you to see if this rumour was true.

Whether they were shacking up or not?

So take care of it, ok?

So what did you want? I have to get back to work.

So Miss. Jinnkama.

Are you shacking up with the Personnel Manager here?

What? There're better ways of asking that, aren't there?

Well no, I couldn't think of anything else.

You could have just asked if I was sleeping with the Manager.

Huh? You slept with the manager?

You didn't know what it meant did you?

I'm sorry.

I didn't sleep with him you know.

Oh. I'm relieved.

But I can't stay here anymore.

Why not?

Isn't it obvious? I can't work here like I used to with these kinds of rumours going on about me.

That's true.

It's supposed to be your job to fix these problems, so why is it I'm telling you?

I'm sorry.

I'm leaving here. Find me another place. Got it?

Man I wish something good would happen.

If you gave her your address, she'll send you a present. That's what I think.

Was there a package for me?

Yeah, I left it in your room.

Really?

It looked like it was from a woman.

A woman?

Yessss!!

When I got home today, there was a package waiting for me.

No way.

This is amazing.

Come on what then?

The sender was the older woman. I knew it from the letter inside.

Come on, don't disappoint us like that.

It said, "From all of us women", but do you think this means it's the end of all this?

Yup, game over. There's no chance of a package from the younger one.

Forget the younger one, but I think the older women have something going for you.

It was all a dream, young one. You should return to reality ASAP.

That's true. I let it all go to my head.

I help the lady, she's indebted and gives me a gift, then I get to go out with her. It was too good to be true.

I finally came to my senses.

It's true that we can't expect anything else to happen. That's what I think.

Make no mistake; you were really something yesterday.

You've definitely moved forward. I got a little courage from what you did.

Everyone...

23rd Birthday

I turned 23 just now.

And I got live an amazing dream.

And now I'll return to my everyday boring life...

Oh my gosh. You really worked hard on this didn't you?

Well I really wanted this to be good.

A birthday cake. You guys, thanks so-

Look at the time! I'm going to be late.

How late does your Mother think she's going to be sleeping?

What is it?

Uh, th, that cake. What it is for?

It's been a year since Aoi and Shuuya started dating. This is to celebrate.

Didn't I tell you not to come down when I'm in the house?

That's too cruel.

Lowerling, take these documents to Future Soft. They're the resumes of the new workers.

Don't botch things up for me, you got it?

I'm sorry.

At the same time, take these to Jinkama Misuzu who's quitting as of today.

Look sharp, Yamada. There's plenty of people that can take your place you know.

What happened?

Want me to get that for you?

Can you really?

Pervert! Peeping around in broad daylight! Just because I'm a foreigner. Seriously!

Oww!

Don't go around accepting things you have no chance of doing!

What, what!

Idiot.

That's too cruel.

[empty] [empty] [empty]

Thank you very much.

You're welcome.

[We're sorry, but please use an alternate entrance]

I don't believe this.

What do you think you're doing there?

Shinnkama-san.

Do you know how long I've been waiting?

I'm so sorry.

Here.

What is this?

This is worthless like this!

You're hopeless. I don't believe you can't even deliver documents properly.

Do you even deserve to live?

Do you think if you just stand there, I'm going to forgive you?

Do you have any backbone at all?

Don't you have anything to say for yourself?

Hey, hey, what are you crying for?

It's my birthday today, and everything's going wrong.

I didn't know anything about that.

I said, don't touch anything.

You're disturbing the neighborhood just being here.

Idiot.

Look sharp, there's plenty of people that can take your place.

Do you even deserve to live?

This is to thank you for what you did on the train.

I was touched by your bravery.

I hope any injuries you had are getting better.

This is...

Could it be?

It's actually came!! This is amazing.

What am I doing with something precious like this?

I gotta tell everyone.

Ii i i it's unbelievable.

I got a package from the young lady on the train, containing a gift and a thank you letter.

What should I do?

The gift came!

It's a miracle.

Calm down and take a deep breath.

I'll advise you.

Requesting details.

The package contained two tea cups, a cute envelope, and a cute letter with cute writing on it.

I think the letter smells good.

It's no good, my face is getting all hot, and drftg&j

I gotta calm down.

Calm down, you're just imagining that smell.

Can you tell anything from the contents of the letter?

It says "I was touched by your bravery.".

Doesn't this sound too good to be true? It sounds like he's just making things up.

You can't tell a lot from just that one line.

If it was a delivery, did you get her telephone number too?

H, hhher cell phone number!

Th, th, the delivery slip had her cell phone number on it!

Not her home, but her C E L L. Woow.

Why don't you give her a call? Not her home, but her C E L L. Woow.

Why don't you give her a call?

Don't take this guy seriously.

Call her.

This is crazy. I gotta relax for a minute.

Calling her is. Impossible.

There's no way I can call a girl up.

Just type her number in. You can think about what to say later.

First, pick up your cell.

It's no use. People can't change that quickly.

Maybe there's another way.

How about a letter?

I emphatically agree! You'll sound more keen that way.

It's late so wait until tomorrow before making any moves.

Women don't like being called out of the blue. It's late so wait until tomorrow before making any moves.

Women don't like being called out of the blue.

I'm a woman, but I wouldn't mind. I'd feel relieved that my package arrived properly.

I'd feel a sense of honesty.

It's late today. How about tomorrow?

Fool! You should act when you can.

What are your specs? I'll advise you.

I'm a regular anime otaku type guy.

I'm 23 years old, which is the number of years I haven't dated.

I make 27-36K a year, and live with my parents.

I have no car, and look like your stereotypical otaku.

Don't worry, we're all like that.

Why don't you treat it like a thank you call.

I'm sure she won't mind.

I can't.

I'm holding my cell, but I can't dial her number.

I need more courage than on the train.

My hands are shaking and my face is hot.

My heart's pounding.

This isn't just a thread topic anymore. We're behind you on this one.

Even I'm getting nervous.

Me too.

Everyone's hands shake the first time. It was like that for me too.

Come on, he's just making it up.

You can buzz off.

I'm cheering you on.

Just remember. The girl's alone, but you?

You have all of us supporting you. Don't forget that.

Thanks so much everybody.

I'm starting to cry thinking about your kindness, and how weak I am.

I want to change.

You can do it, you can do it!!

How about that letter?

With a letter, the chance of talking to her again is too low.

If it's two cups, then she's interested in you.

It's standard as a gift.

Do you know what brand cups they were?

He ru mess?

Har mess?

Which is it?

It says on the cups that they're H E R M E S

I wonder what brand it is?

What? Hermes? No way! Hermes?!!

Yes! Yes!!

It's pronounced Ermess.

Not the one with Lala on it. Hehe.

Whoa, Hermes eh? That's a rich lady we're talking about.

EeeHermes? That Hermes?

That's the brand that makes the bags right? Brand name cups...my hands are shaking.

Hermes!

I don't think she'd chose Hermes if she just wanted to thank you. That's what I think.

Thinks are really heating up here!

Call her, call her, call her!

Make it a letter. You'll never be able to speak properly.

Call her. Definitely call her.

Definitely DON'T call her.

It'll show you really appreciated the gift. Give her a call.

If you're going to call her, I'll be on standy to advise you.

After 11, it's couples hour. How depressing for me.

Make up your mind already, and call her!

It's too late already. Give it up.

In your position, what have you got to lose?!

What should I do?

The Train Man

It's amazing.

Dddensha Otoko (The Train Man). Is that me?

Everyone... I...

You can do it!

I'll do what the next post says to do.

Call her!!

Please, Densha Otoko. Change for our sake.

731-Alias Densha Otoko

I'm going to call her now.

[yes] [yes] [yes] [yes] [yes] [yes]

YES!

Go for it kid!!

Hurry up and make dinner, stupid! Do you want to get hit again?

Shut up! I'm not your house maid!

I was able to say it too.

_0_9_0_

Hey.

Yeah?

Are you thinking about your future seriously?

Marriage right?

No need to worry, I'm thinking about it.

_5_0_

You can do it. You're the best of us guys. You're great!!

Everyone.

It's ringing.