Original subtitles

Ah, we're here!

Legend says these woods are evil...

the perfect place to sacrifice a kitten.

Oh, this place is creepy.

I'll be honest.

I only dress dark like this to meet new people.

OMG! Me too!

Then let's go chill at my parent's beach house!

Aah! Help!

Somebody call the sheriff!

Ugh!

Mr. Pickles!

S03E02 Momma's Boy

sync and corrected by ninh www.addic7ed.com

Morning, Mama!

You may eat now, Sheriff.

Yay! Now.

Num-num-num-num. Yummy!

Right, Abigail?

I know what's yummy.

There's pudding in that cupboard over there.

Aw!

- No pudding till after supper! - I'm sorry.

Here, I know how to cheer you up.

Oh, yeah.

You love it when I brush you, don't you, Mama? Mm!

- Yes, you do! - Oh, yes.

Why, Mr. BoJenkins!

What's up, man?

I was just chilling out, you know.

Just trying to get that pudding. Ha ha.

Wait. What are you doing here?

Oh. Uh...

I was just "pudding" some pipe down

up in your mama's bedroom.

Oh.

Thanks, man. You're a good friend.

Why don't you stay awhile?

Oh, not today, Mama.

I got to go see my Uncle Jimmy.

You're always going to see your Uncle Jimmy.

Hmph! Bye, Mama!

- Bye, Mama! - Sheriff...

I didn't know you were such a mama's boy.

You need to be a man, man!

What? I am a "man" man, man!

A man can eat whenever he wants.

Really?

Sheriff, how 'bout I show you how to be a man?

Oh, but leave your doll here.

She's not a doll!

She's Abigail.

Ugh.

Yah!

Are we going to see your Uncle Jimmy?

There's no Uncle Jimmy.

Yah!

Hyah!

Now, there's three things you got to do to be a man.

Step one, have a drink.

Two, get in a fight.

And, three, Sheriff, you ever been with a woman?

Oh, yeah, dude. Ha ha.

Nunh-unh, Sheriff.

- Abigail! - Boy, we got work to do.

- Oh. - Hey, Sheriff!

- Hey, good to see you, Sheriff! - Hi, Sheriff!

My man, two whiskeys.

I've never seen you drink, Sheriff.

I drink... sometimes.

Put that in a sippy cup.

You don't sip it, Sheriff. You shoot it.

Oh, yeah!

♪ Ooh Mmm. ♪

Ohh! Oh.

Whoa!

I feel good!

Ha ha! Now, on to step two.

No, seriously.

I feel all warm and cozy,

like I'm floating in a warm universe of...

happy liquids all over my wiggly body.

Say what, now?

Oh, what's this drink taste like?

Whoa! Easy, now, player.

I love you, man.

Oh, all right.

Oh!

- And I love this song! - Uh, Sheriff?

Hey, everybody! I'm having fun!

Yeah! Let's boogie-woogie-woogie!

Hey! Get your hands off my female...

Unless you trying to throw down!

All right, step two. Ha ha!

You want to fight?

Well, let's fight!

- Whoa! - Aah!

Not that kind of fight, Sheriff!

I think it's time you put a plug in that jug.

Don't tell me what to do!

Whoa!

Everybody just sit down and shut up!

Sheriff's got drinking to do.

Uh-oh.

Look, boy!

I found a rectangle.

I thought you were with your Uncle Jimmy.

Where are you? I want that sausage.

I'm by the River Tavern, and I don't have a sausage.

But I have a pickle you can eat.

No! This is for the talking rectangle to eat.

- Hello? Hey! - Hello?

Aah! Bang, bang!

Sheriff! Bang-bang, bang-bang!

Sheriff, be cool, man!

- Put the gun down! - No!

I'm the sheriff!

I'll arrest this whole universe...

even all the aliens.

Aliens? Sheriff, you drunk.

I'm not drunk!

I'm perfectly fine!

- Let's get out of here! - No, ladies, don't leave!

Oh, my God!

I better call his mama. Mm.

Hey. Where's my...

- Looking for this? - Uh-oh.

I found your talking rectangle!

- Mm-hmm. - Mm-hmm.

Sheriff, put some clothes on.

- Mama. - Oh, no.

Mr. Blur made me drink.

You think you can sex all of us

and lie about going to see your Uncle Jimmy?

Ladies, I can explain!

Hey. That's what you told Mama.

Uh...

So that means you had sex with Mama!

Oh! Whoa!

Aah! Ohh!

- Sheriff! - Sheriff!

Whoa! Hey, come back here!

Ohhhhh!

Oh! Oh! Aaaahhh!

Ugh!

Damn, Sheriff! You drank too much.

I didn't mean fight me!

Although that was step two.

Shut up!

If you're gonna have sex with Mama,

you're gonna marry her.

Now, just 'cause you take a hooptie for a test-drive

don't mean you got to buy it.

Don't try to change the subject.

I'm talking about Mama!

If you were a man, Mama's Boy, we'd never be in this mess.

Well, maybe I don't got to drink, fight,

and sex to be a man.

Maybe you're no friend at all.

Just a no-good bozo!

Fine.

Let's just go our separate ways.

Good luck in the wild with your doll, Mama's Boy.

She's not a doll!

She's... Abigail?

Abigail!

Shut up, Sheriff!

No, shut up, Sheriff!

- Shut up! - No, you shut up!

Seriously, shut up.

Something's out there!

All right, I'm shutting up.

But it's not because you told me to!

Aw.

Oh, man! My head hurts!

- Shut up. Shut up. - Why does my head hurt so bad?

Will you... Shut up!

There's something up in them woods.

It could be cannibals.

Or sexually-confused inbreds or...

Oh, it's just a bunch of wolves.

Wolves?!

Oh!

Sheriff, we got to man up

and fight these wolves!

Nah. You don't got to fight to be a man.

Uh, come get some, wolf bitches!

- Oh. Man. - Whuh! Ahh! Wa-haa!

Aah! Uhh! Uhh!

Good news!

I found Abigail!

Not now! They eating me! Aah!

Just tell the wolves to stop or you'll arrest them.

Good idea. Now, listen up, wolves!

Oh, great. I already got your attention.

Huh?!

Now, place your paws behind your heads.

Hey, the doll!

They like the doll!

I'm sorry. Who?

Abigail.

Thank you very much.

Now, hi, wolves!

My name is Abigail.

I'm a little funny girl. Look at me walk!

♪ Doop-de, doop-de, doop, boop ♪

And fly around. Whee!

I can sing a song.

♪ La, la-la, la-la ♪

What else can I do?

Look, I'm over here.

And now I'm over here.

And now I'm over here.

- Yeah, Sheriff! - And now I'm over here.

It's working!

And now I'm over here.

And now I'm over here.

And now I'm over here.

Sheriff, wake up!

Aaaaahhhh!

A-A-A-Abigail!

Oh! I am never drinking again.

Uh-oh.

The mama wolf!

Goodbye, Mama's Boy!

Uh! Uh! Aaaahhh!

Hey, I know how to cheer you up.

See, you are just cranky 'cause of these knots back here.

Oh, yeah.

You like it when I brush you, Mama Wolf.

- Yes, you do. - She likes you!

I guess being a mama's boy can be pretty handy.

Oh, yeah.

I'm pretty... pretty cool.

Oh! Oh.

- What? - I, uh...

What, man? What?

I think Mama Wolf likes you a little too much.

What do you mean?

Welcome to step three!

What?

Oh, no.

I can't do that.

You better go have sex with that wolf, or we're dead!

Oh, no.

Oh. Well, uh...

nice place you got, I guess.

Oh. Okay.

Look, uh, I don't know about this.

You know, I... Oh!

You're very assertive. Oh.

Look, you know, I'm kind of waiting for marriage and...

Oh. You want me to take my pants off?

Okay. Don't look.

Oh! Oh. Uh, okay.

Oh! Um...

Hey, uh, shouldn't we get to know each other a little first?

Hey, what are you doing to my pee-pee?

Hey! Aah!

Aah! Aah! What's happening?

Aah! Oh, can you slow down?

Owie, owie, owie, owie! That hurts!

That hurts!

Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!

Ow! Ow-ooooohhh!

Ha ha!

Sheriff, now you're a man.

Huh?

Sorry, babe.

I got to go see my Uncle Jimmy.

Huh? Uh-oh.

Her man's home.

Only one thing to do in this situation!

Run!

- Aaaaahhhh! - Aaaaaahh!

Oh!

I guess we outran it.

I don't think that...

Well, anyway, it's all good, man.

Just be good to Mama.

- Oh, and do me a favor. - Yeah?

Can you not tell anybody I had sex with a wolf?

Hi, Sheriff!

Sheriff, you had sex with a wolf?

Aw!

Hee! Oh.

♪ It started with a kiss, and then ♪

♪ I had to kiss you once again ♪

Hey, uh, I got to be honest.

There is no Uncle Jimmy.

But, look, I'm really not looking for a relationship.

Oh! What are you doing here, Mr. Pickles?

sync and corrected by ninh www.addic7ed.com

♪ What will your mama say