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1
00:00:00,346 --> 00:00:02,566
[birds singing]
2
00:00:02,609 --> 00:00:04,611
[dramatic music playing]
3
00:00:11,531 --> 00:00:14,795
[panting]
4
00:00:21,280 --> 00:00:23,195
[rustling nearby]
5
00:00:23,239 --> 00:00:24,457
[gasps]
6
00:00:24,501 --> 00:00:26,981
♪
7
00:00:27,025 --> 00:00:29,027
[grunts]
8
00:00:29,071 --> 00:00:31,334
[panting]
9
00:00:31,377 --> 00:00:33,162
Oh!
10
00:00:38,297 --> 00:00:41,039
-[growling]
-[shrieks]
11
00:00:42,301 --> 00:00:44,303
[laughter, indistinct chatter]
12
00:00:46,349 --> 00:00:51,180
Ah, it is so nice
to finally have a day off.
13
00:00:51,223 --> 00:00:54,357
-It's Sunday.
-Paul F. Tompkins doesn't
believe in Sundays.
14
00:00:54,400 --> 00:00:56,837
Or doctors appointments
or bathroom breaks.
15
00:00:56,881 --> 00:00:59,362
Well, since you have
all this free time,
16
00:00:59,405 --> 00:01:01,190
-have you finally
read my script?
-Oh!
17
00:01:01,233 --> 00:01:04,149
Shoot! I'm sorry, Jimmy. I did.
18
00:01:04,193 --> 00:01:06,151
And I... loved it.
19
00:01:06,195 --> 00:01:09,850
You captured the book perfectly.No notes.
20
00:01:09,894 --> 00:01:12,418
No notes?
21
00:01:12,462 --> 00:01:14,855
No... notes?
22
00:01:14,899 --> 00:01:16,509
Thank you, Edgar.
23
00:01:16,553 --> 00:01:19,382
Well, I shall just send it in
as is, then.
24
00:01:19,425 --> 00:01:22,559
-Final draft, incoming.
-[clears throat] Say, Edgar?
25
00:01:22,602 --> 00:01:24,735
-[clears throat]
Why, yes, Lindsay?
-You know what I miss?
26
00:01:24,778 --> 00:01:27,390
Handwritten letters? Landlines?Light brown M&M's?
27
00:01:27,433 --> 00:01:30,654
Sunday Funday. Remember that?
28
00:01:30,697 --> 00:01:33,004
I sure do, Lindsay!
29
00:01:33,047 --> 00:01:35,833
-What... is this?
-[gasps]
30
00:01:35,876 --> 00:01:39,184
It looks like
a Sunday Funday list.
31
00:01:39,228 --> 00:01:41,012
Nope, we're not doing
Sunday Funday.
32
00:01:41,055 --> 00:01:43,667
We retired it, remember?
33
00:01:43,710 --> 00:01:46,278
[laughing]: That's too bad,
because it's...
34
00:01:46,322 --> 00:01:50,761
BOTH: Bachelor/Bachelorette
Party Sunday Funday!
35
00:01:50,804 --> 00:01:52,763
-[horn honking]
-What?!
36
00:01:52,806 --> 00:01:54,460
-[Edgar laughs]
-♪ Sunday Funday♪
37
00:01:54,504 --> 00:01:56,245
♪ Sunday Funday,
Sunday Funday...♪
38
00:01:56,288 --> 00:01:58,203
What do you think, Jim-skillet?
39
00:01:58,247 --> 00:02:01,815
[singing along]:
♪ Sun-day Fun-day♪
40
00:02:01,859 --> 00:02:03,556
ALL:
♪ Better than a Monday♪
41
00:02:03,600 --> 00:02:05,558
♪ Can only do it one way♪
42
00:02:05,602 --> 00:02:07,299
♪ And that is the drunk way♪
43
00:02:07,343 --> 00:02:11,347
♪ Sunday Funday,
better than a Monday♪
44
00:02:11,390 --> 00:02:15,220
♪ Can only do it one way,
and that is the drunk way♪
45
00:02:15,264 --> 00:02:18,658
♪ Sunday Funday,
better than a Monday.♪
46
00:02:23,315 --> 00:02:26,623
♪ I'm gonna leave you anyway♪
47
00:02:26,666 --> 00:02:28,712
♪ I'm gonna leave you
anyway♪
48
00:02:28,755 --> 00:02:31,193
♪ Gonna leave you anyway.♪
49
00:02:36,285 --> 00:02:39,462
If I see one plastic
novelty penis,
50
00:02:39,505 --> 00:02:41,290
I'm shoving you off the bus.
51
00:02:41,333 --> 00:02:44,380
Don't worry, Gretch.
Only real ones.
52
00:02:44,423 --> 00:02:45,685
[squeals excitedly]
53
00:02:47,470 --> 00:02:50,473
ALL:
Surprise!
54
00:02:50,516 --> 00:02:52,736
-What the shit?
-Whoo! Hell yeah!
55
00:02:52,779 --> 00:02:56,174
Party bus bachelor party
Sunday Funday!
56
00:02:56,218 --> 00:02:58,524
-Whoo!
-Ooh!
57
00:02:58,568 --> 00:03:00,918
So honored to be included,
you guys.
58
00:03:00,961 --> 00:03:04,095
Gonna crush it.
You'll see... basically.
59
00:03:04,138 --> 00:03:06,402
-Where are all my real friends?-Which friends?
60
00:03:06,445 --> 00:03:07,838
How am I supposed to get buck
61
00:03:07,881 --> 00:03:09,927
with my future
ball-and-chain here?
62
00:03:09,970 --> 00:03:11,276
-Yeah!
-EDGAR: Check out
63
00:03:11,320 --> 00:03:14,105
all the amazing stuff
we have planned.
64
00:03:14,148 --> 00:03:17,935
First, the oldest tiki bar
in the San Fernando Valley.
65
00:03:17,978 --> 00:03:21,330
We'll then hop over
to crazy Topanga Canyon
66
00:03:21,373 --> 00:03:23,332
where real-life hippies will
teach us to throw pottery.
67
00:03:23,375 --> 00:03:29,294
Then, a coastal sundown drive
along the water.
68
00:03:29,338 --> 00:03:31,427
It's gonna be hardcore.
69
00:03:31,470 --> 00:03:33,907
-More like hard-snore.
-[scoffs]
70
00:03:33,951 --> 00:03:35,909
The only way to make this
impending disaster
71
00:03:35,953 --> 00:03:38,869
remotely fun now is
to immediately get hammered
72
00:03:38,912 --> 00:03:41,437
and enjoy what an utter failureEdgar and Lindsay
73
00:03:41,480 --> 00:03:44,483
-once again prove to be.
-Where the hell is
all the booze?
74
00:03:44,527 --> 00:03:48,531
I had the privilegeof crafting a special microbrew
75
00:03:48,574 --> 00:03:50,576
to commemorate the event.
76
00:03:50,620 --> 00:03:54,885
Introducing the Jimmy
and Gretchen... Strawberry...
77
00:03:54,928 --> 00:03:58,497
-Huh? Pale Ale!
-[laughter]
78
00:03:58,541 --> 00:04:00,543
[laughs]
What a laugh.
79
00:04:00,586 --> 00:04:03,023
[laughing]:
So jolly.
80
00:04:03,067 --> 00:04:05,417
This is going to be fun,
trust us.
81
00:04:11,075 --> 00:04:12,903
Paul aboard!
82
00:04:12,946 --> 00:04:14,731
[laughs]
83
00:04:14,774 --> 00:04:17,777
[Becca laughs, sighs]
84
00:04:25,394 --> 00:04:27,787
[whooping, cheering,
excited chatter]
85
00:04:27,831 --> 00:04:31,356
[clears throat]
Hello, everybody. Hi.
86
00:04:31,400 --> 00:04:34,490
As we get closer to Jimmy
and Gretchen's big day,
87
00:04:34,533 --> 00:04:39,582
I just want to say how much
I look forward to being firmly
88
00:04:39,625 --> 00:04:42,498
involved in their lives,
then even more than now.
89
00:04:42,541 --> 00:04:45,631
I'm gonna be there
is all I'm saying.
90
00:04:45,675 --> 00:04:50,244
And now a song to get
this party started!
91
00:04:50,288 --> 00:04:52,159
-[whoops]
-Just wait.
92
00:04:52,203 --> 00:04:54,945
Quickly, just right
after this, but quickly.
93
00:04:54,988 --> 00:04:56,512
-I just have a quick... [grunts]-[feedback hums]
94
00:04:56,555 --> 00:04:58,644
Hello, everyone! Hi!
95
00:04:58,688 --> 00:05:03,214
[laughs] Hi.
I have a huge announcement.
96
00:05:03,257 --> 00:05:04,998
-EDGAR: English.
-Is everyone looking at me?
97
00:05:05,042 --> 00:05:08,437
-English.
-Shut up, back there! Okay.
98
00:05:08,480 --> 00:05:10,613
-Drumroll.
-[Lindsay imitates drumroll]
99
00:05:10,656 --> 00:05:14,660
I'm going to have another baby![screams]
100
00:05:14,704 --> 00:05:16,619
What? What? [laughs]
101
00:05:16,662 --> 00:05:18,272
[chanting]:
Becca! Becca!
102
00:05:18,316 --> 00:05:20,623
-Becca!
-Seriously?
Hey, nerd, it worked!
103
00:05:20,666 --> 00:05:24,670
Oh, my. Huzzah! Huzzah!
104
00:05:24,714 --> 00:05:26,629
-[laughs]
-[car horn honks]
105
00:05:26,672 --> 00:05:29,283
-MAN: Shut up, jerk!
-Oh, sorry. Sorry. [chuckles]
106
00:05:29,327 --> 00:05:31,547
Hell yeah! What a miracle.
107
00:05:31,590 --> 00:05:33,766
-Little baby growing in there.
-Yeah.
108
00:05:33,810 --> 00:05:36,595
Gosh, can you believe
it's not just come anymore?
109
00:05:42,035 --> 00:05:45,561
-[radio changing stations]
-Me? A papa.
110
00:05:45,604 --> 00:05:48,041
What responsibility.
111
00:05:49,260 --> 00:05:52,568
-[music playing]
-[sighs]
112
00:05:52,611 --> 00:05:54,483
One more of these
ultra-low-ABV bad boys,
113
00:05:54,526 --> 00:05:57,529
and I'm liable
to tell you a little secret.
114
00:05:57,573 --> 00:06:00,010
-Uh, no.-Are you sure? It's quite juicy.
115
00:06:00,053 --> 00:06:03,100
Paul, I've never been more sure
of anything in my life.
116
00:06:03,143 --> 00:06:04,841
[laughs]: Oh!
That sounds like a challenge.
117
00:06:04,884 --> 00:06:07,844
But you have to swear
not to tell anyone.
118
00:06:07,887 --> 00:06:10,499
If you do,
you'll owe me $1,000.
119
00:06:10,542 --> 00:06:11,717
Okay, fine. Deal.
120
00:06:11,761 --> 00:06:15,808
Just tell me so I can be out
of this horrible conversation.
121
00:06:15,852 --> 00:06:18,463
[chuckles]
I impregnated Becca.
122
00:06:18,507 --> 00:06:21,292
Direct deposit method.
123
00:06:21,335 --> 00:06:23,468
[singsongy]:
With my member.
124
00:06:23,512 --> 00:06:25,122
[laughing]
125
00:06:27,429 --> 00:06:30,170
-Well, that is a good secret.
-I told you.
-[both laughing]
126
00:06:32,999 --> 00:06:35,175
[groans]
127
00:06:35,219 --> 00:06:38,135
Oh, bother. Oh.
128
00:06:38,178 --> 00:06:40,616
Hi, everybody.
I have an announcement.
129
00:06:40,659 --> 00:06:43,488
-What is it?
-And... sent.
130
00:06:43,532 --> 00:06:45,838
-[phone chimes]
-JIMMY: I feel like
we haven't given
131
00:06:45,882 --> 00:06:47,623
enough attention
to how thrilling it is
132
00:06:47,666 --> 00:06:49,973
-that Becca is pregnant again.
-No, no, no!
133
00:06:50,016 --> 00:06:51,583
Jimmy, no!
134
00:06:51,627 --> 00:06:54,499
But what is so extraordinary
about this event
135
00:06:54,543 --> 00:06:57,284
is the method by which
it transpired.
136
00:06:57,328 --> 00:06:59,765
You see, as it turns out,
137
00:06:59,809 --> 00:07:03,726
Paul used nature's baster.
138
00:07:03,769 --> 00:07:05,945
His willy! He used his willy!
139
00:07:05,989 --> 00:07:11,516
Paul put his penis inside Beccaand moved it in and out.
140
00:07:11,560 --> 00:07:14,432
-[giggling]
-Party officially set off.
141
00:07:14,476 --> 00:07:16,782
-[laughter]
-[feedback squeals]
142
00:07:16,826 --> 00:07:18,567
What-What?
143
00:07:18,610 --> 00:07:21,570
This is the first I'm hearing
of this shocking news.
144
00:07:21,613 --> 00:07:23,572
You guys are so lucky
you have us
145
00:07:23,615 --> 00:07:25,661
to make your lame-o party
awesome.
146
00:07:25,704 --> 00:07:28,011
-[Jimmy laughing]
-Hey...
147
00:07:29,708 --> 00:07:33,103
Okay, we're stopping at
the liquor store immediately.
148
00:07:33,146 --> 00:07:35,148
♪
149
00:07:45,724 --> 00:07:48,945
Oh, I can actually have
more than one because
150
00:07:48,988 --> 00:07:51,687
most women don't even knowthey're pregnant at this point.
151
00:07:51,730 --> 00:07:54,603
You've done a lot of shitty
things to me over the years--
152
00:07:54,646 --> 00:07:56,822
dropped me in the laundry chute,
153
00:07:56,866 --> 00:07:59,346
made me sleep in the backyard
because I breathed too loud--
154
00:07:59,390 --> 00:08:01,827
but sleeping with my husband
was the lowest,
155
00:08:01,871 --> 00:08:04,003
and I'm including
that summer you told me
156
00:08:04,047 --> 00:08:06,702
I had to drink your pee
or I wouldn't get boobs.
157
00:08:06,745 --> 00:08:08,834
Lindsay, I swear to you
158
00:08:08,878 --> 00:08:12,229
it was as passionless
as sex has ever been.
159
00:08:12,272 --> 00:08:15,537
You should know.
You married him.
160
00:08:23,414 --> 00:08:24,850
[Gretchen sighs]
161
00:08:26,852 --> 00:08:28,637
Oh, do I have a booger?
162
00:08:28,680 --> 00:08:30,769
Let's make a promise
that we'll do this forever,
163
00:08:30,813 --> 00:08:33,642
that this, our freest selves,
shall e'er rule
164
00:08:33,685 --> 00:08:37,646
and that marriageshall not change us in any way.
165
00:08:37,689 --> 00:08:42,259
I don't know. In five years,
my freest self might be sober.
166
00:08:42,302 --> 00:08:43,652
That's not funny.
167
00:08:43,695 --> 00:08:45,305
Who knows
what our lives will be?
168
00:08:45,349 --> 00:08:47,090
We can make
these big declarations,
169
00:08:47,133 --> 00:08:48,744
but it doesn't mean anything.
170
00:08:48,787 --> 00:08:50,746
Or worse,
we think it means something,
171
00:08:50,789 --> 00:08:52,443
so we force ourselves
to be this,
172
00:08:52,486 --> 00:08:54,532
even though
that's not who we are anymore.
173
00:08:54,576 --> 00:08:58,275
-But I am who I am.
-I am, too. For now.
174
00:08:59,319 --> 00:09:01,844
What's your favorite part?
175
00:09:01,887 --> 00:09:04,281
-Of what?
-Of the script, man.
176
00:09:04,324 --> 00:09:06,718
Come on. Was it
the Ramones concert intercut
177
00:09:06,762 --> 00:09:08,764
with Neville Chamberlain
announcing conscription?
178
00:09:08,807 --> 00:09:12,724
Or Kitty's seduction atthe hands of the church rector?
179
00:09:12,768 --> 00:09:15,858
[groans]
It was all really good, Jimmy.
180
00:09:15,901 --> 00:09:18,904
Well, that was markedly
disappointing. For our next...
181
00:09:18,948 --> 00:09:20,340
Well, well, well.
182
00:09:20,384 --> 00:09:22,821
[chuckles]: Edgar,
I thought you had jury duty.
183
00:09:22,865 --> 00:09:25,868
Oh, um, the guy confessed.
184
00:09:25,911 --> 00:09:27,304
Crazy.
185
00:09:27,347 --> 00:09:29,872
Uh, Jimmy,
this is Paul F. Tompkins.
186
00:09:29,915 --> 00:09:33,919
Hey, Jimmy.
Any friend of Edgar's.
187
00:09:33,963 --> 00:09:38,097
So, what are you guys
up to on this glorious Sunday?
188
00:09:40,186 --> 00:09:42,885
Howdy, everybody!
My name is Paul F. Tompkins,
189
00:09:42,928 --> 00:09:46,149
-and I will be your host
for this party.
-[others whooping]
190
00:09:46,192 --> 00:09:50,240
I regret to inform youthe old plan died of being lame.
191
00:09:50,283 --> 00:09:51,589
-Oh!
-[laughter]
192
00:09:51,633 --> 00:09:52,895
-Boo!
-New plan:
193
00:09:52,938 --> 00:09:55,941
-we're going to Las Vegas!
-[cheering]
194
00:09:55,985 --> 00:09:57,551
-Hit it!
-[lounge music playing]
195
00:09:57,595 --> 00:09:59,553
[chuckles]:
Oh.
196
00:09:59,597 --> 00:10:02,034
-♪ Vegas♪
-[laughs]
197
00:10:02,078 --> 00:10:05,081
♪ We're on our way
to Las Vegas♪
198
00:10:05,124 --> 00:10:07,736
♪ We're gonna go
where paying for sex♪
199
00:10:07,779 --> 00:10:10,739
♪ Is not a crime♪
200
00:10:10,782 --> 00:10:12,828
-[whoops]
-That's true.
201
00:10:12,871 --> 00:10:14,873
♪ I said Vegas♪
202
00:10:14,917 --> 00:10:17,267
-♪ We're gonna go where the...♪
-Hi, buddy.
203
00:10:17,310 --> 00:10:18,921
We have a question.
What were you doing
204
00:10:18,964 --> 00:10:22,402
while another man
was having sex with your wife?
205
00:10:22,446 --> 00:10:24,361
Uh...
206
00:10:24,404 --> 00:10:26,929
I think I was watching a movie.
207
00:10:26,972 --> 00:10:28,931
Oh. What movie
were you watching?
208
00:10:28,974 --> 00:10:30,628
Was it A Cuckwork Orange?
209
00:10:30,672 --> 00:10:32,195
The Hunt for Red Cucktober?
210
00:10:32,238 --> 00:10:33,936
Uncle Cuck? The Mighty Cucks?
211
00:10:33,979 --> 00:10:36,329
-The Joy Cuck Club?
-Cuckleberry Finn?
212
00:10:36,373 --> 00:10:37,983
The Marx Brothers in Cuck Soup?
213
00:10:38,027 --> 00:10:39,593
-[laughter]
-Good Night and Good Cuck?
214
00:10:39,637 --> 00:10:40,943
One Flew Over
the Cuck-oo's Nest?
215
00:10:40,986 --> 00:10:42,379
-Mooncuck?
-Ha!
216
00:10:42,422 --> 00:10:44,598
Sick burns. So comical.
217
00:10:44,642 --> 00:10:46,383
Excuse me for a second.
218
00:10:46,426 --> 00:10:49,168
[laughter]
219
00:10:49,212 --> 00:10:51,954
I'm looking real bad
in this scenario, nerd.
220
00:10:51,997 --> 00:10:54,521
I got to tell 'em
the full, triumphant story.
221
00:10:54,565 --> 00:10:55,653
Vernon, you can't do that.
222
00:10:55,697 --> 00:10:57,960
-Hmm.-EDGAR:
The Cuck-il Wears Prada.
223
00:10:58,003 --> 00:10:59,657
What's it worth to you?
224
00:10:59,701 --> 00:11:02,225
[sighs]
225
00:11:02,268 --> 00:11:03,922
Are you on Venmo?
226
00:11:03,966 --> 00:11:05,881
Mm-hmm.
227
00:11:05,924 --> 00:11:07,578
BECCA:
Hey! Hey, hey, hey!
228
00:11:07,621 --> 00:11:09,798
-You know what? No, listen!
-[chatter quiets]
229
00:11:09,841 --> 00:11:11,843
You all should be ashamed
of yourselves.
230
00:11:11,887 --> 00:11:15,978
Vernon is a strong, secure man
who should be celebrated
231
00:11:16,021 --> 00:11:18,981
-for his open-mindedness.
-Aw, thanks, Bec.
232
00:11:19,024 --> 00:11:22,114
Yeah. And actually, I think
the movie he was watching was
233
00:11:22,158 --> 00:11:25,814
-I Heart Cuckabees!
-[howling laughter]
234
00:11:25,857 --> 00:11:27,772
Didn't see that coming,
did you, cuck?
235
00:11:27,816 --> 00:11:30,470
-Hey-o!
-[laughter]
236
00:11:31,950 --> 00:11:32,777
[phone chimes]
237
00:11:32,821 --> 00:11:34,692
No, no, no, no, no, no!
238
00:11:34,736 --> 00:11:37,651
-No, Vernon, no!
-I was there, too, you guys!
239
00:11:37,695 --> 00:11:39,915
I was in the room
where it happened.
240
00:11:39,958 --> 00:11:41,699
-[groans]
-I was a part of it!
241
00:11:41,743 --> 00:11:42,787
[horn honking rapidly]
242
00:11:42,831 --> 00:11:44,920
I came, too! So hard!
243
00:11:44,963 --> 00:11:46,008
[horn honking rapidly]
244
00:11:46,051 --> 00:11:47,270
We all came at the same time.
245
00:11:47,313 --> 00:11:49,011
It was super sexual.
246
00:11:49,054 --> 00:11:52,057
I helped his dong back in
and then Bec blew harder
247
00:11:52,101 --> 00:11:54,843
than she ever blew before.
We held hands after.
248
00:11:54,886 --> 00:11:58,977
I tried to kill myself, and thesex made me want to stay alive!
249
00:11:59,021 --> 00:12:01,937
That's about it!
I yield my remaining time!
250
00:12:01,980 --> 00:12:03,765
Sunday Funday!
251
00:12:12,077 --> 00:12:13,600
Who here's from out of town?
252
00:12:13,644 --> 00:12:15,689
Oh.
253
00:12:22,653 --> 00:12:25,047
So, you picked up a bus driver
and invite him
254
00:12:25,090 --> 00:12:27,179
-into your marriage bed?
-Oh!
-What?
255
00:12:27,223 --> 00:12:28,398
-No, no.
-[laughter]
256
00:12:28,441 --> 00:12:31,488
-Let me explain.
-I don't trust him, Jimmy.
257
00:12:31,531 --> 00:12:33,446
He's got that same look
in his eyes he had that day
258
00:12:33,490 --> 00:12:35,405
he made me eat
all that sour cream.
259
00:12:35,448 --> 00:12:37,711
Oh, you're just mad that he'smaking this party actually fun.
260
00:12:37,755 --> 00:12:39,713
Now, shush. I want to see
who he's going to
261
00:12:39,757 --> 00:12:41,063
take the piss out of next.
262
00:12:41,106 --> 00:12:43,979
Oh, you two are getting married!
263
00:12:44,022 --> 00:12:45,981
-That's right! [whoops]
-[others whooping]
264
00:12:46,024 --> 00:12:48,070
Oh, so great.
265
00:12:48,113 --> 00:12:50,072
Now, you know, things will
change after you get married.
266
00:12:50,115 --> 00:12:52,465
That's right. About to gain
that marriage weight, sucka!
267
00:12:52,509 --> 00:12:53,989
[laughter]
268
00:12:54,032 --> 00:12:55,686
So have you two had
all the big discussions?
269
00:12:55,729 --> 00:12:57,035
-We will.
-Oh.
270
00:12:57,079 --> 00:12:59,733
-Will is my handsy uncle.
-[laughter]
271
00:12:59,777 --> 00:13:01,997
Let's knock some of these out
right now.
272
00:13:02,040 --> 00:13:04,042
First question:
If you have a boy,
273
00:13:04,086 --> 00:13:05,914
-will he be circumcised?
-JIMMY: Yes.
274
00:13:05,957 --> 00:13:08,133
-Everyone calls it a turtle.
-No, that's mutilation.
275
00:13:08,177 --> 00:13:10,092
Will you raise your child
with religion?
276
00:13:10,135 --> 00:13:12,485
-Absolutely not.
-Yes.
277
00:13:12,529 --> 00:13:14,574
Wait, why is everything
about children?
278
00:13:14,618 --> 00:13:16,881
Next question:
Do you want children?
279
00:13:16,925 --> 00:13:20,102
-Probably not.
-Absolutely.
280
00:13:20,145 --> 00:13:21,755
-You're not religious.
-Yes, I am.
281
00:13:21,799 --> 00:13:24,149
I don't talk about it because
you'll make me feel dumb.
282
00:13:24,193 --> 00:13:25,890
Why would you say
that we want children?
283
00:13:25,934 --> 00:13:28,719
-Because I want them.
-Well, I don't.
284
00:13:29,938 --> 00:13:31,243
This feels bad.
285
00:13:31,287 --> 00:13:33,289
Is it just me,
or does this feel really bad?
286
00:13:33,332 --> 00:13:35,508
-You said you weren't sure.
-Well, I changed my mind.
287
00:13:35,552 --> 00:13:38,076
And I might change it again.Right now these are my beliefs.
288
00:13:38,120 --> 00:13:40,035
But who knows how I'll feel
in a couple years?
289
00:13:40,078 --> 00:13:42,951
Then they're not beliefs.
They're whims.
290
00:13:45,170 --> 00:13:48,695
Ooh, that is not
going to land well.
291
00:13:48,739 --> 00:13:51,960
He's right, we should make thesedecisions before we get married.
292
00:13:52,003 --> 00:13:53,700
What's even the point?
293
00:13:53,744 --> 00:13:55,702
Any rethinking I might do
isn't called "growth"
294
00:13:55,746 --> 00:13:58,531
but "weakness" because Jimmy's
so goddamn set in his ways.
295
00:13:58,575 --> 00:13:59,576
Can't you fucking
adjust something
296
00:13:59,619 --> 00:14:01,012
for me for once in your life?
297
00:14:01,056 --> 00:14:02,579
I have changed for you.
298
00:14:02,622 --> 00:14:04,059
Guys, quick,
name some of the things
299
00:14:04,102 --> 00:14:06,061
I've adjusted for Gretchen.
300
00:14:06,104 --> 00:14:08,759
-Um...
-Uh...
301
00:14:08,802 --> 00:14:10,369
Ha! See?
302
00:14:10,413 --> 00:14:13,982
-You can't name one thing...
-I sucked a dick for you!
303
00:14:16,985 --> 00:14:19,335
I'm sorry, I don't think
I heard that right.
304
00:14:21,119 --> 00:14:25,167
Gretchen told me
to suck a dick, so I did.
305
00:14:25,210 --> 00:14:27,299
I sucked one.
306
00:14:27,343 --> 00:14:31,216
LINDSAY: [sighs] I want a guy
to suck a dick for me.
307
00:14:31,260 --> 00:14:33,392
It all makes sense now,
because of how infrequently
308
00:14:33,436 --> 00:14:34,959
he wanted to make love.
309
00:14:35,003 --> 00:14:36,439
Was I at least
on the short list?
310
00:14:36,482 --> 00:14:38,397
I always thought
I'd be dope at that
311
00:14:38,441 --> 00:14:40,834
on account of how good
I am at Popsicles.
312
00:14:40,878 --> 00:14:43,837
-[bus rumbles]
-[all grunt, groan]
313
00:14:43,881 --> 00:14:45,187
Why are we stopping?
314
00:14:45,230 --> 00:14:47,537
-[groans]
-ALL: Oh!
315
00:14:47,580 --> 00:14:51,976
As far as I can hypothesize,I have an optic yeast infection.
316
00:14:52,020 --> 00:14:54,065
Happens to the best
home brewers.
317
00:14:54,109 --> 00:14:55,849
Move. I'll drive.
318
00:14:55,893 --> 00:14:57,242
We've also run out of fuel.
319
00:14:57,286 --> 00:14:59,375
-[groaning]
-What?
320
00:14:59,418 --> 00:15:01,899
-I don't have any service.
-What?!
321
00:15:01,943 --> 00:15:03,074
Me neither.
322
00:15:03,118 --> 00:15:06,034
This was your plan
all along, wasn't it?
323
00:15:06,077 --> 00:15:09,211
To trap us out here
in the desert.
324
00:15:09,254 --> 00:15:10,821
I'm simply trying to have fun
325
00:15:10,864 --> 00:15:12,866
with this couple
who, by the way, clearly
326
00:15:12,910 --> 00:15:14,346
-shouldn't be getting married.
-Hey!
327
00:15:14,390 --> 00:15:17,132
Don't make fun of my friends.
328
00:15:17,175 --> 00:15:19,134
Some group of friends, Edgar.
329
00:15:19,177 --> 00:15:22,224
The dick-hungry come loverwhose script you clearly hated.
330
00:15:22,267 --> 00:15:23,790
-[giggles]
-Edgar?
331
00:15:23,834 --> 00:15:26,141
I'm sorry, Jimmy, I didn't wantto hurt your feelings.
332
00:15:26,184 --> 00:15:28,273
And the sad girl
he barely even knows
333
00:15:28,317 --> 00:15:30,145
who tricked him
into sucking a dick.
334
00:15:30,188 --> 00:15:31,059
[laughter]
335
00:15:31,102 --> 00:15:33,061
Then there's this
alcoholic Gorgon
336
00:15:33,104 --> 00:15:34,671
who boned her sister's ex.
337
00:15:34,714 --> 00:15:37,021
I had her permission.
338
00:15:37,065 --> 00:15:39,023
-You did not!
-Do me! Do me!
339
00:15:39,067 --> 00:15:40,938
Then there's
her Howdy Doody husband
340
00:15:40,982 --> 00:15:43,245
who's too lame to even
waste a good insult on.
341
00:15:43,288 --> 00:15:46,291
-[Lindsay laughs]
-All right, that's it.
342
00:15:46,335 --> 00:15:48,859
-Get off of this bus!
-[others oohing]
343
00:15:48,902 --> 00:15:50,730
Oh, let me think about it.
Um, no.
344
00:15:50,774 --> 00:15:54,125
-Get out! Get out!
-Watch yourself, Edgar.
345
00:15:54,169 --> 00:15:56,171
I can make it so you never workin this town again.
346
00:15:56,214 --> 00:15:58,912
I don't care. You can be
as hard on me as you want,
347
00:15:58,956 --> 00:16:02,264
but don't mess with my friends.
348
00:16:02,307 --> 00:16:05,180
What are you gonna do
about it, loser?
349
00:16:05,223 --> 00:16:06,224
I said...
350
00:16:08,270 --> 00:16:10,272
...get out!
351
00:16:11,273 --> 00:16:12,578
[sharp crack]
352
00:16:13,797 --> 00:16:14,798
[gasps]
353
00:16:20,325 --> 00:16:21,848
EDGAR:
Is he okay?
354
00:16:21,892 --> 00:16:23,850
Is he okay?!
355
00:16:23,894 --> 00:16:25,852
I don't know; I'm having
a hard time remembering
356
00:16:25,896 --> 00:16:27,158
what I'm supposed to do.
357
00:16:27,202 --> 00:16:30,161
R-I-C-E. What's the "I"?
358
00:16:30,205 --> 00:16:32,250
[coyote howls in distance]
359
00:16:32,294 --> 00:16:35,079
-Where the hell are we?
-PAUL: I may have taken
360
00:16:35,123 --> 00:16:37,212
a wrong turn when the yeast
started to activate.
361
00:16:37,255 --> 00:16:39,083
Why did you have to push him?!
362
00:16:39,127 --> 00:16:40,650
This is so bad.
363
00:16:40,693 --> 00:16:42,652
You guys don't know him
like I do.
364
00:16:42,695 --> 00:16:45,133
He is going to ruin my life.
365
00:16:45,176 --> 00:16:47,178
What are you doing?
366
00:16:47,222 --> 00:16:48,962
He's a hostile combatant!
367
00:16:49,006 --> 00:16:50,312
Oh, stop it.
You're acting
368
00:16:50,355 --> 00:16:52,227
as irrationally
as you did when you decided
369
00:16:52,270 --> 00:16:54,316
my screenplay needed work.
370
00:16:54,359 --> 00:16:56,970
Edgar's right--
we can't trust this guy.
371
00:16:57,014 --> 00:16:59,234
He called me an alcoholic.
[chuckles]
372
00:16:59,277 --> 00:17:00,365
PAUL:
What's happening?
373
00:17:00,409 --> 00:17:02,237
Who's fallen?
374
00:17:03,281 --> 00:17:04,935
[gasps]
375
00:17:05,849 --> 00:17:08,504
See? I told you.
376
00:17:08,547 --> 00:17:10,288
TOMPKINS [groans]:
What?
377
00:17:10,332 --> 00:17:13,465
-[gasps]
-Edgar?
378
00:17:13,509 --> 00:17:15,772
Guys? What's happening?
379
00:17:15,815 --> 00:17:17,121
Do not listen to him.
380
00:17:17,165 --> 00:17:19,558
TOMPKINS:
Edgar. [groans]
381
00:17:19,602 --> 00:17:22,735
You got to help me.
My back really hurts.
382
00:17:22,779 --> 00:17:25,260
Why did you push me
down the stairs?
383
00:17:25,303 --> 00:17:27,044
Why are you all
standing over me?
384
00:17:27,088 --> 00:17:28,611
What are you gonna do to me?
385
00:17:28,654 --> 00:17:31,527
I'm sorry if I've been
hard on you at work,
386
00:17:31,570 --> 00:17:34,007
-but don't do this.
-Why do you have this?!
387
00:17:34,051 --> 00:17:36,271
I-I was uncomfortable
working with you.
388
00:17:36,314 --> 00:17:39,709
I mean, you're a disgruntled
employee with PTSD.
389
00:17:39,752 --> 00:17:42,364
-He has a point!
-And then you pushed me
down the stairs.
390
00:17:42,407 --> 00:17:45,062
And then I woke up,and you're all standing over me
391
00:17:45,106 --> 00:17:48,239
in the middle of the desert!
[groaning]
392
00:17:49,675 --> 00:17:52,287
Hey.
393
00:17:52,330 --> 00:17:53,244
[groans]
394
00:17:57,640 --> 00:18:00,643
-[Edgar panting]
-What are we gonna do?
395
00:18:00,686 --> 00:18:03,080
I'll take care of him.
396
00:18:03,124 --> 00:18:05,735
-[blade stabs]
-[all screaming]
397
00:18:05,778 --> 00:18:08,303
It's okay. I'm fine.
398
00:18:08,346 --> 00:18:10,305
Oh, my God!
What's happening?!
399
00:18:10,348 --> 00:18:13,569
-[screaming continues]
-Someone tell me
what's happening!
400
00:18:13,612 --> 00:18:15,440
[Paul continues shouting]
401
00:18:17,442 --> 00:18:19,227
I'm so cold.
402
00:18:19,270 --> 00:18:21,794
Why can't I stand up?
403
00:18:21,838 --> 00:18:24,623
What did you do?! He's a doctor!
404
00:18:24,667 --> 00:18:26,234
He said he was gonna
take care of me!
405
00:18:26,277 --> 00:18:27,626
I-I thought he was
coming over to kill me!
406
00:18:27,670 --> 00:18:30,194
I told you he was a psychopath!
407
00:18:30,238 --> 00:18:33,415
[crying]:
Oh, God, and now he's dead.
408
00:18:33,458 --> 00:18:36,374
Just like all of you
are about to be dead.
409
00:18:36,418 --> 00:18:39,116
-[others gasp]
-What did you say?
410
00:18:39,160 --> 00:18:41,336
Oh, nothing.
411
00:18:41,379 --> 00:18:44,077
Just, um, spitballing here,
but, uh,
412
00:18:44,121 --> 00:18:47,777
I think maybe now
I have to kill all of you.
413
00:18:47,820 --> 00:18:50,258
-[chuckles]: You...
-I'm not joking, fuck-face.
414
00:18:50,301 --> 00:18:53,304
This is actually my dream.
415
00:18:53,348 --> 00:18:55,219
You drew first blood.
416
00:18:55,263 --> 00:18:56,655
The security camera on this bus
417
00:18:56,699 --> 00:18:58,657
will show you pushing me
down the stairs.
418
00:18:58,701 --> 00:19:01,834
But out here, no camera.
419
00:19:01,878 --> 00:19:07,405
Oh, yes, from here on out,
it's all self-defense.
420
00:19:11,757 --> 00:19:13,281
Oh, no.
421
00:19:13,324 --> 00:19:15,935
-No!
-[whimpering]
422
00:19:17,372 --> 00:19:19,330
You're first, Edgar.
423
00:19:19,374 --> 00:19:21,376
No. No!
424
00:19:22,681 --> 00:19:24,944
-[screaming]
-[Jimmy wails]
425
00:19:24,988 --> 00:19:26,511
He's okay, right?
426
00:19:26,555 --> 00:19:27,947
Yeah.
427
00:19:27,991 --> 00:19:29,949
You're okay. Are you okay?
428
00:19:29,993 --> 00:19:31,647
-[screaming]
-[grunting]
429
00:19:36,391 --> 00:19:38,175
[screaming]
430
00:19:41,178 --> 00:19:42,614
[whimpers]:
Oh, my God.
431
00:19:42,658 --> 00:19:45,182
[others gasping]
432
00:19:45,226 --> 00:19:47,489
Breathe. Just breathe.
433
00:19:47,532 --> 00:19:50,405
[hyperventilating]:
I am. I'm calm.
434
00:19:50,448 --> 00:19:52,929
[crying]:
We-we just killed someone!
435
00:19:52,972 --> 00:19:56,106
JIMMY:
Okay.
436
00:19:56,149 --> 00:19:59,370
We have to leave.
Um... Mexico.
437
00:19:59,414 --> 00:20:01,285
We have to go to Mexico.
438
00:20:01,329 --> 00:20:02,634
You'd do that?
439
00:20:02,678 --> 00:20:04,070
As long as we're together.
440
00:20:04,114 --> 00:20:05,289
-[crying]
-LINDSAY: You guys!
441
00:20:05,333 --> 00:20:08,423
I can't. I can't.
442
00:20:08,466 --> 00:20:10,163
-Calm down.
-I can't!
443
00:20:10,207 --> 00:20:14,124
Gretchen, you have to
hold this for me.
444
00:20:23,742 --> 00:20:25,135
-[stifled laugh]
-Shh!
445
00:20:25,178 --> 00:20:27,268
[laughter]
446
00:20:29,574 --> 00:20:31,446
-What the...?
-Surprise!
447
00:20:31,489 --> 00:20:33,317
[laughter]
448
00:20:33,361 --> 00:20:35,537
What is happening?
I don't understand.
449
00:20:35,580 --> 00:20:37,887
Which part?
The part where Lindsay and I
450
00:20:37,930 --> 00:20:39,541
orchestrated the best
451
00:20:39,584 --> 00:20:42,152
bachelor/bachelorette party
ever?
452
00:20:42,195 --> 00:20:43,414
-[laughter]
-[whoops]
453
00:20:43,458 --> 00:20:47,200
I, uh... yes. I'm speechless.
454
00:20:47,244 --> 00:20:48,550
-Bravo, everyone.
-Yeah.
455
00:20:48,593 --> 00:20:50,421
-Yeah!
-Oh.
456
00:20:50,465 --> 00:20:53,903
-Jimmy, is this real life?
-[panting]
457
00:20:53,946 --> 00:20:57,123
[sobbing]
458
00:20:57,167 --> 00:20:58,386
[retches]
459
00:21:02,781 --> 00:21:06,611
[chuckles]
So, pretty good, huh?
460
00:21:06,655 --> 00:21:09,614
[laughing]:
You let us murder someone.
461
00:21:09,658 --> 00:21:11,529
How did you...?
462
00:21:11,573 --> 00:21:14,053
Well, we knew
you'd demand real booze
463
00:21:14,097 --> 00:21:16,273
-if we had Paul make home brew.-PAUL: What?
464
00:21:16,317 --> 00:21:18,188
But I brewed the ale
in good faith,
465
00:21:18,231 --> 00:21:19,755
independent of the scheming.
466
00:21:19,798 --> 00:21:22,410
It led us to where Paul F.
Tompkins would be waiting.
467
00:21:22,453 --> 00:21:24,847
And you, sir...
468
00:21:24,890 --> 00:21:27,284
I knew eight years
of stage combat would pay off.
469
00:21:27,328 --> 00:21:29,373
Plus, I make my own squibs.
470
00:21:29,417 --> 00:21:31,244
-Oh.
-So, you and Edgar aren't...
471
00:21:31,288 --> 00:21:34,030
Working together anymore? No.
472
00:21:34,073 --> 00:21:36,249
So, with this, you are free.
473
00:21:36,293 --> 00:21:38,817
And you promise not to goto DB Industries' HR department
474
00:21:38,861 --> 00:21:42,430
with any more allegations
of alleged abuse.
475
00:21:42,473 --> 00:21:44,170
Got to say,
476
00:21:44,214 --> 00:21:47,043
that disgusting threesome runneryou guys made up?
477
00:21:47,086 --> 00:21:49,524
I almost broke, like,
five times.
478
00:21:49,567 --> 00:21:50,786
[chuckles]
479
00:21:51,917 --> 00:21:53,528
Oh.
480
00:21:53,571 --> 00:21:56,487
We are not leaving you behind.
481
00:21:56,531 --> 00:21:59,229
-Calm the fuck down.
-Okay.
482
00:22:06,105 --> 00:22:07,629
What?
483
00:22:07,672 --> 00:22:11,415
Mexico?
I thought you hated change.
484
00:22:11,459 --> 00:22:14,766
[chuckles] I suppose there mightbe some circumstances in life
485
00:22:14,810 --> 00:22:17,552
that do change things,
like murder.
486
00:22:17,595 --> 00:22:19,684
Or kids.
487
00:22:19,728 --> 00:22:21,512
Right.
488
00:22:21,556 --> 00:22:24,515
Or murder.
489
00:22:24,559 --> 00:22:26,430
[sighs]
490
00:22:26,474 --> 00:22:29,868
Congrats on knocking up
my big sister, you stud.
491
00:22:29,912 --> 00:22:31,827
[exhales]
492
00:22:31,870 --> 00:22:34,133
I heartily apologize.
493
00:22:34,177 --> 00:22:36,658
It's okay.
494
00:22:36,701 --> 00:22:39,661
-Sister fucker.
-[both laugh]
495
00:22:39,704 --> 00:22:42,620
Ew, you made my sister come.
496
00:22:42,664 --> 00:22:45,841
-[both laugh]
-Ew.
497
00:22:45,884 --> 00:22:48,234
No, don't make me laugh.
498
00:22:48,278 --> 00:22:49,671
Tears will feed the yeast.
499
00:22:49,714 --> 00:22:51,716
-[groans]
-[laughs]
500
00:22:51,760 --> 00:22:54,502
GRETCHEN:
♪ Anytime♪
501
00:22:54,545 --> 00:22:59,507
♪ You're feeling lonely♪
502
00:22:59,550 --> 00:23:03,293
♪ Anytime♪
503
00:23:03,336 --> 00:23:07,645
♪ You're feeling blue♪
504
00:23:09,995 --> 00:23:14,043
♪ Anytime♪
505
00:23:14,086 --> 00:23:18,090
♪ You feel downhearted♪
506
00:23:18,134 --> 00:23:22,704
♪ That will prove your love♪
507
00:23:22,747 --> 00:23:27,970
♪ To me is true♪
508
00:23:28,013 --> 00:23:31,713
♪ Anytime♪
509
00:23:31,756 --> 00:23:37,501
♪ You're thinking 'bout me♪
510
00:23:37,545 --> 00:23:41,287
♪ That's the time♪
511
00:23:41,331 --> 00:23:44,900
♪ I'm thinking 'bout you.♪
512
00:23:46,684 --> 00:23:48,730
So?
513
00:23:48,773 --> 00:23:50,079
-Hard-core?
-Ugh.
514
00:23:50,122 --> 00:23:51,776
-Hard-core.
-[laughs]
515
00:23:51,820 --> 00:23:53,082
-One plot hole.
-Hmm?
516
00:23:53,125 --> 00:23:54,562
How did you know we'd shoot him?
517
00:23:54,605 --> 00:23:56,215
Ah, we didn't know for sure,
but you did.
518
00:23:56,259 --> 00:23:57,956
You killed him to save me.
519
00:23:58,000 --> 00:23:59,871
Ultimate bad boy move, huh?
520
00:23:59,915 --> 00:24:01,133
-Yeah.
-[chuckles]
521
00:24:01,177 --> 00:24:03,179
Wait, where'd you get the gun?
522
00:24:03,222 --> 00:24:05,703
Oh, your dad bought itwhen he came to visit, remember?
523
00:24:05,747 --> 00:24:07,879
You've had a gun in your room
since then?
524
00:24:07,923 --> 00:24:09,707
-Mm-hmm.
-Wow. I've called you
525
00:24:09,751 --> 00:24:12,536
some truly awful things
this past year.
526
00:24:12,580 --> 00:24:14,538
You could've just ended it all.
527
00:24:14,582 --> 00:24:16,584
-Well, yeah, I mean...
-The constant nay-saying,
528
00:24:16,627 --> 00:24:18,455
the endless cooking
and cleaning,
529
00:24:18,499 --> 00:24:20,544
the irrational subservience.
530
00:24:20,588 --> 00:24:22,546
With a simple twitch
of your finger,
531
00:24:22,590 --> 00:24:24,766
the misery could have
ceased forever.
532
00:24:24,809 --> 00:24:27,638
And still, you chose
not to kill yourself.
533
00:24:29,510 --> 00:24:30,728
Bravo, Edgar.
534
00:24:33,862 --> 00:24:38,040
Hey, I'm sorry about the script,Jimmy, but you can't turn it in.
535
00:24:38,083 --> 00:24:41,043
[groans] I suspected
it wasn't very good.
536
00:24:41,086 --> 00:24:43,045
Will you help me fix it?
537
00:24:43,088 --> 00:24:45,787
[laughs]:
Yeah.
538
00:24:45,830 --> 00:24:47,397
I'll call the studio,
say you're consulting.
539
00:24:47,440 --> 00:24:50,226
-Cowriting.
-Fine.
540
00:24:50,269 --> 00:24:53,621
Just promise you'll never
lie to me again.
541
00:24:53,664 --> 00:24:55,666
I promise.
542
00:25:01,846 --> 00:25:04,066
Gretchen's been stealing meds
from my medicine cabinet,
543
00:25:04,109 --> 00:25:07,243
-a ton of them, for weeks now.
-So what? She loves pills.
544
00:25:07,286 --> 00:25:09,767
No. This is the serious stuff.
545
00:25:09,811 --> 00:25:12,248
And I don't think
it's for fun this time.
546
00:25:12,291 --> 00:25:15,730
[chatter, laughter]
547
00:25:15,773 --> 00:25:18,776
♪ We talked
till late that night♪
548
00:25:18,820 --> 00:25:20,386
♪ I walked her home♪
549
00:25:20,430 --> 00:25:22,780
♪ Debating gun rights♪
550
00:25:22,824 --> 00:25:25,783
♪ We put our differences aside♪
551
00:25:25,827 --> 00:25:29,831
♪ Under the parking lights♪
552
00:25:33,835 --> 00:25:37,795
♪ Two years soon passed♪
553
00:25:37,839 --> 00:25:41,494
♪ She sent a picture
from Spain♪
554
00:25:41,538 --> 00:25:45,194
♪ On a stone street,
a seedling♪
555
00:25:45,237 --> 00:25:48,850
♪ Was growing in a storm drain♪
556
00:25:48,893 --> 00:25:51,809
♪ Familiar plight...♪
557
00:25:51,853 --> 00:25:54,812
[dog barks]
558
00:25:57,859 --> 00:25:59,817
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH
38004
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