Original subtitles

- We're getting married. - I have to warn you.

I'm a complete and utter nightmare.

"Duncan is a prick."

I guess that's one of the perks of being a barman.

No one really cares what you do, do they?

- Too much? - You're gonna scare him off.

Bambi: Stephanie says when he likes a girl, he's a loyal regular,

so I gotta get this just right.

- Hi, Richard. - Belle: What are you doing?

- Duncan: Just catching up with some people. - I love you.

Oh, my God. I didn't just say that, did I?

Bambi, this is Duncan. He's my boyfriend.

I love you, too.

Clients, like most people, can get stuck in a routine.

David, old favorite and plastic surgeon.

Good with his hands.

Don't you ever fancy something different?

Why? Don't you like this?

No, no, no, it's fine. It's just you look a bit bored.

It's just the same thing, every booking.

But I like it.

Yeah, but why do you always settle for a...

- Hand shandy? - Exactly.

When you can try some champagne?

Come on, there must be something else you'd like.

Some secret desire.

Some itch you'd like me to scratch.

What is it? Come on, tell me. I don't judge.

I'm impossible to embarrass.

And this is the one place you can be completely honest. Come on.

Whisper it.

- Is that okay?

Yeah. You know me. Anything goes.

You ever done it before?

Medical school.

Christmas revue. I sang South Pacific in suspenders.

Nice.

Not for the audience.

But I still remember the feel of them.

They were tight. Smooth.

And you haven't worn women's underwear since?

I did ask a girlfriend once.

Well, I didn't exactly ask.

Didn't go down well?

No. And she jumped to certain assumptions.

She made out I was some kind of...

Cross-dressing, deviant, latent homosexual?

Exactly. And I'm not.

At least not on a weekday.

Don't laugh. - I won't.

Wow. How does it feel?

It's unbelievable.

It should do. Pure silk.

Oh, God.

- Sheer tulle. - Oh, Christ!

- Chantilly lace. - Mmm!

Satin...

Everyone's got something.

It's just a case of finding out what it is.

Eventually, the truth will out.

Thank you.

Thanks.

Now, I didn't tell you because I didn't want you to panic,

- but this is actually our wedding day. - Hannah...

No, no, no. Don't worry, it's all sorted.

The vicar's a sweetie, your mum's hat is a triumph

and I've written you vows, top pocket.

Come on.

Weddings bring out the best in people,

even if you don't follow all the traditions.

Who said you had to be a virgin to wear white?

You don't have to be a prince to marry a princess.

And not all fairy godmothers carry a wand.

Hello.

- Bambi! Come on. - You okay?

Yeah, I'm just not sure where I'm supposed to be.

- Do you want me to find out? - Yes.

Here you go. Back in a minute.

What the hell are you doing here? I can't believe you came!

I didn't have much choice.

Couldn't you have made up some excuse?

Yeah, I did try. Believe me.

- Hannah. - Oh, hi.

Did you get my missed calls? Or is your phone...

No, no, no, I got them.

All 27 of them.

I was just checking to see which room we're in.

Oh.

It's the Westminster Room. Just up there.

- Nice list! - It's just in case I forget anything.

Mmm. Best man. It's an important job.

Yep.

Well, I best get back to Byron.

Yeah, yeah, me, too.

Bambi's as nervous as a kitten.

Are kittens nervous?

Maybe. You know, if there's a dog around.

Good afternoon.

Duncan, this is Stephanie. Stephanie, this is Duncan.

Stephanie is...

Mother of the bride. Pleased to meet you. Belle, a word?

Mmm.

How does two weeks in the Maldives sound?

The most fascinating client...

Jesus, Stephanie. This is a wedding.

In case you hadn't noticed, I have a boyfriend now.

I can't just disappear off.

Oh, what a shame. Did I mention he has his own island?

I'm really sorry, I can't. But thanks for thinking of me.

It's very kind of you.

Well, you know me, 60% heart, 40% commission.

Mmm-hmm.

- Rings? - In here.

- You all right?

Who needs family when you've got friends, right?

Oh, actually, I wanted to give you this.

Gear? Byron, really not the time.

No, I want you to look after it. Till after.

Right. Of course.

I don't want to be blurred, you know?

I want to remember everything today.

Sharp around the edges.

Come here.

- Listen. - Mmm?

I know you haven't always been 100% about Byron,

but I want us all to be friends. You, me, Byron,

Ben.

All that matters is you and Byron.

And that you're sure about this.

- I am. - Good.

And I'm not even gonna try and explain why because I'll just talk too much

and annoy you like I usually do.

Oh, Bambi.

I know that I try too hard.

I'm always saying the wrong thing

and then I see that look in people's eyes like I'm some kind of annoying fly.

Oh, don't.

But with Byron, I never have to stop myself,

or try and be something that I'm not. I'm just me.

And that's why I'm sure.

Do you know what? You're an inspiration.

What?

You just do it, you make the leap.

Maybe that's what I should do with Duncan.

- Belle... - Why not?

I can't keep just doing this.

I can't keep running away from how I feel.

I love him.

Oh, fuck.

What?

I know him.

He's a punter. Duncan is a client.

What?

I had him the other day. He called himself Richard.

He booked me. He said he would book me again.

I am so sorry.

But you should know, shouldn't you?

You should know the truth about him before you go falling in love with him.

Oh, Belle.

The registrar's ready. We're on.

The wedding ring is an unbroken circle.

It has no beginning and no end.

It symbolizes your unending and everlasting...

We have now come to the exchange of rings,

which is the traditional way of sealing the contract that you both..

I, Byron Seebohm, give you this ring,

as a symbol of my love.

I, Gloria White,

give you this ring as a symbol of my love.

You are everything. My best friend.

My Bam Bam.

Forever.

The day we met was the first time I felt...

I don't need this. You know how I feel.

And you know why?

'Cause you are the only one who ever asks.

I love you.

Yeah!

Whoo!

No, no, much closer, much closer. As if you like each other.

That's it, right in there.

Okay, after three. One, two, three!

All good? I have to get back to the office.

- Hannah? - No!

If you want me, you can pay for me.

Like you paid for the others.

Is it true? Just tell me.

Is what true?

Have you slept with Bambi?

- Hannah, please... - So you did?

You slept with her? You paid for Bambi.

- How many times? - Hannah...

Was it just a one off, or have you seen her before?

I have never been with her before.

But you've been with other escorts?

Yeah.

Was it because of me? The book? Did I push you towards it?

It wasn't the book.

But we never said what we had was exclusive.

You sleep with other men, I sleep with other women.

It's my job! It's what I do! It's different.

Is it?

How many times? How many times have you been unfaithful

since we've been together?

- Ten? More than 10? - Hannah...

More than 20? Who with? Is it just escorts or other girls?

Other writers? Do you fuck all your authors?

I mean, we all know how you like it over the desk.

All right, downstairs.

Hannah, this doesn't have to get unpleasant.

So why didn't you tell me if you thought it was all so fine?

Because I knew it would hurt you.

Okay, so if you knew it would hurt me,

then you must've known you were doing something wrong.

You don't even make sense!

If you look back over our relationship,

I never lied to you.

How can you say that?

Okay, well, you tell me.

When did I ever misrepresent myself?

I told you I was a fuck-up. I told you I was no good at any of this.

And that's your answer, is it? Your "Get out of jail free" card?

"I told you I was a fuck-up, therefore I can behave how I want,

"fuck who I want, lie when I want"?

- Hannah... - No, no, don't touch me!

What did you want, Hannah? What did you want me to give you?

I wanted honesty! I wanted a man who didn't lie.

I didn't. I never lied to you.

Yes, you did. And you know the biggest lie? You told me you loved me.

I did. I do. I do love you.

When I said it, I meant it.

And what about when you were fucking Bambi? Did you mean it then?

What was I to you? Just a story?

A cash cow?

Look into my eyes, tell me you love me,

squeeze me till the words come out?

No. Hannah...

I'm a whore,

who has sex for money, who gets judged and looked down on.

But you know what? When I look at you,

I can hold my head up high.

I wanted to punch him.

You know, like a proper punch. On the nose. Crunch.

Blood everywhere.

You'd have probably missed.

Or swung like a girl.

Arms flailing.

My job is to read men,

you know what they want, what they are,

and I missed it. I really didn't see that coming.

I should've listened to you.

Hannah...

Yeah, but you knew.

Not that. I didn't know that.

I didn't know anything.

Except I hated his stupid fucking llama face

and the way he spoke to me.

I'm sorry.

You know what I hated the most?

The way I felt when I saw you together.

Congratulations!

Gloria's husband started his honeymoon a bit early.

Ben, would you stop calling me that?

I'm sorry, Gloria.

He did really well today. - Really well.

You all right, Han?

You know what I think would make you feel better?

We should break into his office, steal back your book.

It's not written on some giant scroll, Bambi. I email it.

- Well, then we'll take his computer. - That's a good idea.

- Is it?

She's got a point, though.

About what?

You still want to do this book?

It was never really about the writing, was it?

Not this time. I just did it 'cause he wanted me to,

and then I got involved.

So write about him. Your last chapter.

Duncan and his little habit.

Do you really want Duncan to be the man who profits from your life story?

Right.

- You all done? - Yeah.

Feel better?

Maybe.

A bit.

So now...

We "send all."

He's never gonna publish it now.

You sure?

Sure.

What do men want from escorts?

Let's start with one man,

Duncan Atwood, my editor.

A serial user of prostitutes,

a man who tells stories for a living but doesn't know when to stop.

Some men use escorts

because they don't have time for a relationship.

Or they want something special.

Something their wives or girlfriends can't offer them.

And some men, like Duncan,

use prostitutes because they can.

Because it's easier,

a simple exchange without truth or consequence.

And for Duncan, a man so fundamentally dishonest

he doesn't even know when he is lying,

it's the closest to a real relationship he will ever get.

Come on, Gloria and her husband are taking us out for breakfast.

Belle, make him stop calling me that!

I have no control over Ben. Never have, never will.

In my job, secrets are unavoidable.

It's who you tell them to that really counts

and from now on, I keep my secrets

with those I love best.

- Hello? - Belle? Stephanie.

Listen, the offer still stands. The plane leaves at 4:00.

This time tomorrow, you could be waking up with the sand beneath your toes

and a man between your legs.

Your choice.

Okay, bye.

- Come on, then. - I'm starving!

I love my job. Hey.

- Ben? What is it? I'm about to get on the plane. - Look in your bag.

- What? - Just look in your bag.

- What's going on? - Read it.

Ben, what is this?

Turn it over.

Oh.

Ben. I can't talk, I've got to go to work.

I know. Go! Have adventures.

See the world.

Just come back to me.

Ben?

Really?

Ben?

Maybe.