Original subtitles

YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE

Van Damme, turn here. Right there, mid-block.

It busts my balls that you call me Van Damme.

And what does your friend Seagal say about it?

Looking good today, huh?

Check out the dessert you're gonna eat!

It's gonna cost me tonight.

Fuck it!

I'm sorry.

How far are they following us?

Van Damme and Seagal?

What do I know? To the door.

I won't let them go any further.

I's a pain in the balls that they call us those names.

At least they should tell me who's who.

I'm Van Damme, obviously.

Yes. Because you spread your legs.

Obviously.

Van Damme.

Check out what the girl has.

And the boy?

- Is so much fuss necessary, guys? - Company orders.

Did you check underneath the bed?

No aliens or anything weird?

How can it be? One's looking after them and on top they fuck around with you.

So much ingratitude!

- Did you check out the round bed? - Huh?

I never got it,

how do they make the pillows?

Do they make them bended?

What do you do to be so looked after?

I'm a food engineer.

What?

I build bridges with broccoli.

For real?

C'mon, girl. If I want to talk, I've got my wife.

I didn't come for that.

Neither did I.

Unzip me.

God and Virgin Mary.

Sorry, Pancho, but this is getting too porn.

What's going on?

Tobías López. Nice to meet you.

C'mon, boys, c'mon, quickly.

Don't' you see we're in an intimate moment?

- What's going on? - Boss, it's all set.

- How is it going, Peña? - Mr. Dugès! Why?

"Mate"?

No. No, thanks a lot.

Mr. Dugès apologizes

for interrupting whatever it is you were up to.

You guys, thank you so much for everything, very nice, I'm leaving.

Stay still.

Very still.

Sorry for this casual meeting.

This is a casual meeting,

isn't it, sir?

It'd be more appropriate to say:

Casual, with formal decision making.

Look, I talked to your people. I heard your offer.

But you've got to understand, it was completely unacceptable!

Unacceptable?

I already gave my word to XM and I'm signing tomorrow.

They even gave me...

What, bodyguards?

I can't relinquish the patent. Are you insane?

And you are naked with a hooker.

Hey, my friend, I'm not a hooker.

- She's not a hooker. - Please,

don't be so sensitive.

Being a prostitute is a job, just like any other.

To prostitute you is not worse than being a lawyer or a politician.

What if I don't sign?

I've got nothing to do, boys, I'm heading home.

I think it's what's best.

Let's see, little girl,

it's OK to cover your shame,

but go right back to where you were.

Where were we, Mr. Peña?

My formula works.

It can keep the meat fresh for months without being frozen.

But for now, it has secondary effects.

That's why I was so firm.

That's it.

The last thing you said. Sign.

No! No!

Maybe you didn't get me

because we Spanish people lack an accent.

And you guys in Buenos Aires have that horrible intonation.

But I insist.

If you don't sign,

your legacy will be a picture in the police section, dead,

naked, on an ordinary bed,

in an ordinary room, with an ordinary hooker.

Tell him I'm not a hooker!

OK, an ordinary bitch.

Do you realize that this preservative kills people?

In a world so full of assholes,

we'd be doing humanity a favor.

Work with us.

We offer you a million-dollar bonus.

A million bucks?

Give it to me, I'll kill him myself. Give it to me!

I feel I'm running out of patience.

And how do I know you're not killing me after I give you the formula?

That's why we gave you a year

to improve the formula and avoid the...

Undesirable effects.

You probably understood: the undesirable effects.

Even cancer!

There's worse things.

Like what?

Bullets.

Who are you, dumbass?

- Ready? - Here it is.

I'd like a "mate" now.

We're out of water.

Darn it.

I'll wait for you outside.

I'm in the meat business

but I can't stand the view of blood.

What did they say?

Mister, Miss, I'll see you later.

Bye.

No!

How do you know the formula is correct?

That's right, I wrote a bluff.

Besides, the formula in itself is nothing.

You'll need the files with the development, the field evidence,

my team's work.

Let us go.

I'll take care of picking up everything and I'll make sure he doesn't run away, OK?

It seems like the kitty pulled its claws out.

I already had the files, the evidence, the team,

and since a few seconds ago, the formula.

Let's see which of your nine lives you're going to give me now.

Leave your little gun on the ground.

Little gun?

Put it down.

You don't know who you're messing with,

you big retard.

No,

but I know exactly what you did.

Give me that mobile phone right now.

I've got guys all over the building.

And I've got cousins all around the suburbs.

Hey you, girl! Come here.

You don't call this one a "little gun", do you?

I'll give you the phone. I don't care about the rest.

Run!

Bad idea!

Run, you asshole!

Can't you wait for New Year's Eve, asshole?

This is not what we agreed!

Everybody, up!

A 30-year-old man with a beard and a Kiss T-shirt.

He's escaping with the whore.

Damned motherfuckers!

Where the fuck are they? I want them in a body bag!

What are you doing, asses? Knocking down the building?

Go get them! Go get them!

Stop! They're mine!

They're going back to the apartment!

What do we do?

This is what we've got.

There they are!

- I can't. - Hurry up!

I can't.

I'm cold.

You'll be OK. Easy.

I'm not a whore.

No.

You're beautiful.

A scammer.

I know.

C'mon. I won't leave you here.

Here. It's your life insurance.

It's worth more than anything you could record.

No, no.

Honey!

Please! Hang in there!

Hey!

Get down, assholes! He's escaping down the alley!

There he is! Go get him!

Lord, give me a hand.

Are you OK? Do you need anything?

Welcome.

There you are.

Let's go.

- The bus! - Right. The bus.

You've lost him.

You've lost him! You've lost him!

An asshole with a Kiss T-shirt in this hotel!

What else did you need, huh?

A light sign? The guy dressed up in a ballet outfit?

What are you, assholes? Assholes!

And what's with you? Stick your dick out. Stick your dick out,

so you'll call more attention! Put the gun away, retard!

We're searching for him, and getting him.

One thing: we won't lay a hand on him

until we have that contract.

Dugès will probably want to take care of this rat himself.

- Who's Kiss? - Who's Kiss?

Are you an idiot?

The ones who painted their faces white and stuck their tongues out.

- Kiss. - Did they step on baby chicks?

Baby chicks. Sons of bitches!

Get out. C'mon!

Is it possible that we can't do anything right?

Thanks, Lord.

Now that all of us are here,

I wanted to thank you on behalf of Rabbi Mendi,

for having traveled from so far to the community's yearly meeting.

Let's go to the temple.

Let's split up.

You two, that way!

Arzola, will you be standing there all day?

That way!

Anyway, they say it's a lie,

they didn't kill any baby chicks.

It's a myth. It's part of the show.

Maybe they killed one once,

and it stuck.

Will you stop busting my balls with the Kiss thing?

What matters, what really matters,

is that you find anything we can use to find

that fucking son of a bitch.

I want two of your men on it

24 hours a day.

And night.

24 hours a day include the night, asshole!

Anything you need, dude?

Yes.

Do you sell glue?

- What's up? - I thought we'd lost you.

Just yesterday I...

was talking to...

- you know... - Who?

Kosievski... Kosinski...

Come in.

It's my nephew's.

We always play switching stuff.

He goes to school with my briefcase,

and I've got the frog backpack.

Where were you hiding?

Thing is I'm not from here.

I went out for a walk and I got lost.

Well, we all get lost every now and then.

But if you're planning to stay in the community

first you have to see Rabbi Mendi.

Rabbi Mendi.

That's who I wanted to talk to.

You're an angel.

This way.

Yes? What do you need?

He's coming to see the rabbi.

At this time?

- Yes, yes, I was... - He was at the hotel.

He took the bus with us.

Don't be so paranoid, please.

You're hammered.

No, I'm sober.

OK, Pablo, follow me.

- I'm coming, too. - What's wrong with you?

Don't tell me he's not weird. He looks like a toad from another well.

What do you expect from guests at a national encounter?

They can't all be the same.

Yes.

Excuse us, Rabbi.

It's us.

Come in.

Rabbi,

he is Pablo. He was delayed.

- Hello. - What's up?

Can you wait outside, please?

Take a seat.

Very good.

- What's your name? - Pablo.

Pablo Cohen, sir.

You don't need to call me sir.

And we'd better use your Hebrew name.

What is it?

Shalom.

Shalom. Very good.

This house is open for everybody,

but I need to know a little

about the people staying here during the encounter.

Of course.

Good. Where do you come from?

- From Rosario. - You come from far.

No, Rosario has always been close.

And what do your parents do, exactly?

- What do you mean? - I mean for a living.

- They run a business. - What kind?

A butcher's.

Kosher meat, right?

Yes, kosher.

Tail of rump, sirloin tip...

OK, but the meat your father sells

is it Kosher?

Yes, yes...

I mean, there are other brands

but they do sell that one.

Do you have a Jewish education?

Super Jewish, yes.

What school did you go to?

School number 8, from Rosario.

Secular.

No, no. Public.

Still, non religious, lay?

Yes, lay.

And what temple did your parents attend?

To Rosario's...

It's the...

central synagogue of Rosario.

Shalom, seriously,

what are you doing here?

Tell me the truth.

The truth?

I'll tell you the truth.

I never had a father.

My mom raised me and my brother by herself.

But she died when I was 10.

It was shocking.

A huge shock, terrible.

Her things were kept in a trunk

for about 20 years.

A month ago

was the anniversary of her death.

And I brought myself to open it.

And I found a bunch of her stuff.

Letters. Photos. Relatives I had never heard of.

I don't get along

with my brother that much.

We hardly speak to each other.

And, out of the blue, something hit me.

In a letter my mom wrote to my grandma,

she called her "the Russian".

The Russian. My mom's mom.

- The Bobe. - No!

She was quite smart, actually.

She came from Russia.

My family comes from Russia as well.

What a coincidence!

My father, my mother, my uncles.

Russia is tough.

There's too many...

Russians.

And, so?

So, Jewish blood runs through my veins.

I felt a spiritual call

to the center of my being.

I felt I wanted

to meet with God.

Help me.

Yes, of course, we will help you.

But first, you've got to learn

some things you obviously don't know.

Yes, of course.

This is the house of God and it's open to all.

But if you don't respect it,

you'll have to leave.

I think it's fair.

Do you want a kippah?

Yes, please, I'm starving.

Do you like this one?

It's divine.

Just like the Pope's.

¡Sara!

Sara, Shalom is staying with us.

I ask you to give him a hand during the days of the encounter.

OK, perfect.

"Baal teshuva".

Cheers.

No. "Baal teshuva".

That's what we call the non-orthodox Jews that want to become one.

Something like: "He who returns."

That would be me: "Baal teshuva".

You'll share the room with him.

No, not with me.

No, no. Why me?

Because you've got two beds and you've been here for a year now.

Yosi, this is Shalom.

Shalom, this is Yosi.

I'm sure you'll get along.

- Come with me. - Please.

Go. Go.

Sorry, dude,

I didn't know we'd have to share the room.

I don't like dirt nor mess.

And that window, always open.

I'm claustrophobic.

Was I clear?

Like vodka.

Leonardo Andrade.

With his cell phone and things from his house we've completed his profile.

Everything we found there is weird.

- Weird? - Yes. Weird.

A cell phone with just one contact.

This girl's.

He's just discovered selfies.

He doesn't have a medical insurance,

never paid taxes in his life.

Doesn't have a Facebook profile.

He signed up for Instagram a month ago, uploaded just one photo.

- Another selfie? - Almost.

Nothing very special. He's from Lugano, lives in La Boca.

His parents died when he was a kid.

His education was religious, at youth shelters.

His brother is a priest,

but he doesn't have many special skills.

We'll catch him with no big fuss.

With no big fuss?

He can't run away for long.

One thing is true: he's fast.

He was raised in the streets, and can improvise with the unexpected.

Fuss.

The unexpected.

The unexpected.

- The unexpected. - The unexpected.

What is the unexpected for responsible people like us?

What is the unexpected for responsible people like us?

A mistake?

Exactly.

The unexpected is a mistake.

A mistake. That's right.

The unexpected is a mistake.

Good then. We all agree.

Good. We all agree, right?

If there's a mistake,

it's our duty to identify the cause.

If there's a mistake, it'd be our duty to identify the root.

I love to feel we're all on tuned in.

And I know

you will get my point

very well.

I'm very glad we all agree on this.

You guys, who know how to appreciate soccer.

You guys know how to appreciate soccer, right?

Messi,

trained with the most perfect resources in the world

in the richest club in the world,

Argentina's team captain in the 2014 final,

lost because of an unexpected event.

What was the unexpected?

Messi, with all the available resources at hand,

lost to an unexpected event. What was it?

The referee.

Higuaín's penalty.

That's weird.

The referee. Higuaín's penalty.

Very strange.

And in '98,

when Zidane,

a kid from one of the poorest neighborhoods in Marseille,

led France to victory...

Or better yet:

in '86, when Maradona,

a kid raised in the poorest environment, in Villa Fiorito,

led Argentina to the final...

It was thanks to what?

Instead, Zidane,

a kid from one of the poorest neighborhoods in Marseille,

led France to victory in '98,

yes, in the World Cup.

Better yet, Maradona, in '86,

a poor kid from Villa Fiorito, made Argentina a world champion.

It was thanks to what?

The hand of God!

No, no, no, no!

Zidane and Maradona

were raised in poor neighborhoods,

stupid!

Next time I hear any of you

underestimating a kid from the streets,

with the excuse that you have

all the means to catch him,

I guarantee I'll beat the hell out of you!

Understood?

This better not be something you made up.

- Where? - The green frog backpack.

Let's see.

I'm sorry, Mr. Mendi.

I didn't know toy guns weren't allowed.

It's not the same. He switched it.

It's for my nephew in Rosario.

I can return it if you want.

There's nothing to explain.

It was obviously a misunderstanding.

- I apologize. - It's all cool, man.

- I want to talk to you. - But, rabbi...

In my office.

Hello?

I've got a problem.

I'm doing good, Leo, thanks for asking.

After all this time...

Did you remember you have a brother?

Yes, yes, you're right. I'm sorry.

Done. Connected.

What are you calling me for?

I need help.

That's funny, you always call to ask for help,

never to offer it, right?

I was witness of a crime,

and the murderers are looking for me, to kill me.

You're a criminal, Leo.

And I have nothing to do with you.

These guys are dangerous. You're all I have.

Beautiful. Call the police.

No, you don't get it, Agustín.

These guys are hardcore, seriously.

They're looking all over for me to frame me.

They're broadcasting me as a suspect.

He's in Valentín Gómez and Ecuador.

And they probably know you exist.

C'mon! C'mon! He's here!

He's moving! He's here!

Stay still!

I need your smartest guy.

He needs to be experienced in the streets, speak Spanish

and be in the area.

The Romanian? OK.

I want him here. This is a blank check.

- This place is cool. - Yes.

And it's going to be splendid tonight

for the Sabbath ceremony and the closure of the event.

Two months ago,

the library and the assembly room

were destroyed by a fire.

Some skinheads from the neighborhood.

Truth is the community is supported through donations,

so we'll go by without a library

until we receive a contribution.

I swear, if I could,

I'd give you the best library of all.

Thanks.

And this is the Torah.

It's our law, our identity,

our sacred book.

The divine teaching that the people of Israel

received from Adoshem.

- From where? - Adoshem.

It's a way to say God.

I knew it. I was testing you.

No, no, no! It mustn't be opened, nor touched.

It's sacred to us, and we must protect it.

Sara!

I'm coming.

One second, please.

I want to thank Sara

for having prepared the meal for all the guests at this encounter.

It's 100% vegetarian and Eco-kosher.

I didn't find anything in the Talmud

that's opposed to this menu.

So, thank you very much.

¡Bravo!

Please, please.

I also want...

to welcome a young man who is back.

Shalom.

How is Russian gang doing?

What's wrong with this kid?

I don't know. He's a little...

As I was saying. Welcome Shalom,

and "lehaim"!

"Lehaime"!

Sorry for the delay,

but I also want to welcome Shalom.

Since we share the room,

I want to tell him this

is not something I like to have in my room.

I'm sorry,

but I was taught that it's rude to go through other people's stuff.

And I don't think this is something you can bring to a community.

Even less if it's a Nazi group

that has an SS at the end of its name.

You don't need to be familiar with this group to know what they are.

They're Jewish.

Yeah, right.

Seriously, they're Jewish.

The one with the long tongue, who spits blood,

that's Gene Simmons.

His real name is Chaim Klein Witz.

He's from Israel.

His mother is Hungarian and was in a Nazi concentration camp.

Chaim was born mute, and had an atrophied frenulum.

That's why he doesn't have a tongue, but a slice of ham instead.

What is he saying? He eats ham?

The one with the star of David on his face

is Stanley Eisen,

descendant of German Jews.

Yes. German Jews.

And The Three Stooges are also Jewish.

Mr. Spock and Captain Kirk,

from Star Trek.

- There you go. - And Adrián Suar.

- Adrián Suar is Jewish? - And Harrison Ford as well.

- Harry Son Forr? - Yes, yes...

Harrison Ford from "Witness",

remember?

That movie where

he tries to escape from some murderers

and enters a religious community.

Great movie.

But that kind of things don't happen.

Kirk Douglas, Paul Newman.

Ron Jeremy.

Ron Jeremy too?

And Jesus.

He's lying since he said hi, Sara.

He's unlike any other.

- I find him amusing. - Amusing?

What's amusing about this "potz"? Not amusing at all.

Easy, your blood pressure will raise.

Your face is all red.

The potato knishes didn't agree with me.

The guitar player is Jewish.

The other one was born in Israel.

Some important knowledge I've got.

I'm so cultured.

He's got a bachelor's degree in "History of drug fiend musicians".

I'm sorry. I didn't know you were here.

It's OK.

I was looking for something for Sara.

- What are you doing? - Something going on there?

Why are you asking?

- Did Sara talk about me? - She did, but without words.

You're very funny.

No way she's your girlfriend.

Almost.

- Almost girlfriend. - Good! Very good!

Can I ask you a personal question?

Yes, yes. Go ahead.

How's Sara? Is she good?

Sara is a very good girl.

C'mon, don't fuck around.

I'm asking if she's good in bed.

I don't know about that.

Did you feed your dog a biscuit?

- Say what? - Did you do her or not?

I don't know what you're saying.

Stuffing the ole turkey, driving through the tunnel,

hiding the salami, the horizontal hula...

In other words, did you bury the bone or not?

No.

You're talking about making love.

No. I'm talking about tuning pianos, dude.

We've got to be married for that, didn't you know?

- Married? - Married.

You mean, you never, nothing...

- Nothing. - That's crazy.

- How old are you? - I'm 25.

And I'm about

to propose to her.

What the fuck! You'll get hairs in your palms!

We can't waste semen,

we don't use condoms.

Besides, you know what?

You're being disrespectful in so many ways, I feel dizzy.

Well, I'm sorry.

Seriously! You don't understand anything at all

about our tradition.

- Where did you come from? - Lugano.

You're not from Rosario?

I'm from Lugano,

but my love for Rosario is very deep.

And you'd better not get me into trouble,

OK?

Because I know a lot of things about you, did you hear?

Future husband...

And a virgin.

- Shalom... - Yes?

Everything happening to us is ruled by cause and effect.

Yes. Yes, that's true.

Some dumbass people produce effects with their defects.

My brother is like that.

He's never there when I need him.

And are you there when he needs you?

When you judge someone, you're actually judging yourself.

The defects you see in others,

those are the ones you need to fix.

How can you be so young

and so smart at the same time?

It's in the Kabbalah.

Have you read the Kabbalah?

No. I'm more about practicing it.

Once I put a paper in the freezer with the word "Cruzeiro" in it

for a game in the Libertadores Cup.

We won, obviously.

From then on, in every game,

I'd put a paper in the freezer.

That's my ritual.

- It's not about that, is it? - No.

I know there's a bunch of stuff I don't know.

What I do know is, your friend Yosi doesn't like me.

No... Yosi is a good person.

He's a little bit special.

Your boyfriend.

I'm sorry. That was out of line.

I'm sorry.

I've done things I'm ashamed of.

I lost a friend, and it was on me.

I've hurt my brother,

and now that I need him, he won't answer the phone.

By now, I don't know who screwed up.

Or who has to forgive whom.

Do you know what the Kabbalah also says?

That real forgiveness comes

when a person understands there is nothing to be forgiven.

C'mon, don't play it hard on me.

C'mon, c'mon.

The neighborhood won't get on the move without you.

This is what I'm here for. It's my job:

To help with what I can from here.

Take this to Rosita. She'll probably...

need it more than I do.

- See you tomorrow at the game? - See you tomorrow.

- The blessing, Father. - God bless you, son.

Virgin Mary...

Conceived without sin.

Tell me your sins, son.

My sins are old, Father.

They don't expire.

When I was six, I put sugar in grandma's gnocchi.

We had to fill on crackers for dinner.

Yes. Go on.

At 15, my big brother taught me how to drive.

At nights, we'd steal cars and race for money.

If someone didn't pay, he'd be beaten up.

When we were done, by dawn,

we'd leave the cars where we had stolen them.

Later, he had a morality attack,

and stopped loving me.

C'mon, so?

Before that, at 10

when mom died, a pigeon flew into the wake.

It landed on her, and started picking her hand.

I tried to scare it away and slapped mom.

Aunt Marta almost slaps my head off.

Ever since that day, I've hated those fucking birds

and that asshole aunt.

What do you want, Leo?

I'm sorry for always bringing trouble.

But this time it's for real.

Are you kidding me?

Get out of here!

Get out!

- Leave me! What are you doing? - Get out of here!

What are you doing, asshole? What're you doing?

It's not the crazy adventures of Tabbi Leo.

It's actual trouble.

What's this?

Since I was around,

I thought of stopping by

and apologize.

Now that all the country's police is searching for you,

you want to apologize?

No, wait.

Then I learned that real forgiveness comes

when you don't have anything to forgive.

So I'm not apologizing, and I'm not forgiving you.

What?

It doesn't matter. Sara says it better.

The problem here is they're looking for me

because I have something that's very important to them.

Give it to them, take it off your back, asshole!

I can't!

I'm witness to a murder.

The murderers are out to kill me.

What I thought is

I could take advantage of the situation to earn a few bucks,

and if it turns out good, I won't have to work ever again.

If not, I'll just blow it.

That's why I'm here too. To say good-bye.

To tell you to take care.

Because maybe they'll come and get you, get it?

Yes, I get it perfectly, yes.

You haven't changed a bit in all this time.

You're still my little brother, you know?

What're you doing, Agustín?

Yes, you were looking for...

Spare your words and come with us.

Give me the scarf.

Open the door, man, c'mon.

Agustín!

He's very sincere with me.

He tells you he comes from Rosario,

but he tells me Lu--

Leave it there. Look, Sara,

I'm always true to you.

I always tell you how I feel.

I need proof, Sara.

Aren't you hot in those outfits?

I'd be ashamed rather than hot.

These are the ones that burned the library.

Here. Take it.

No, not this.

Money? Do you want money? Here's some money.

If I wanted your money, or the girl's purse, I'd just take it.

Usurer.

So what do you want?

What do you want?

I don't know what I want. I'm thinking about it. But she looks good.

Run, Sara!

Where are you going, little Russian?

Hey, dickhead!

What do you want?

Look, another one.

Go.

I'll take care of this.

Take her away.

So, you'd be the superior race.

You make my ass laugh.

Let's check those braids, Laura Ingalls.

Sara,

let's go, c'mon.

He can manage.

Easy.

He's no good if he's dead. Open up, let him breath.

Let me out!

As soon as this Rambo guy gets here, we're leaving.

Listen: the guy who's coming now

is a master in undercover operations,

he rules at silent infiltrations,

an agent capable of passing by unnoticed

wherever he goes.

His nom de guerre

is Discretion.

My name is Harken.

I've worked for the Corza Rizzoli family,

and for Urano cartel from Calabria.

I've cleaned up Marseille and Alicante.

I've brought my own tools.

And now that we're introduced...

Who's the guy?

Who's busting your balls?

Here you are, sir. Excuse me,

do you spell Harken with an H or a G?

What do you care?

It must be with an H.

If it was a G, it'd be Garken.

Nobody can have that name.

Gender, ethnic group, height, body type, hair,

even ID number.

With all this information, you couldn't catch him?

You were once faster sperms.

It's him. He's been waiting for my arrival to call.

It's this...

connection I have with people who are about to die.

You're online with the seventh ring of hell, please, hold on.

Done? That's it?

Why don't you put me through with the real macho?

The one that shoots half-naked men and defenseless women?

I'm sorry, Tintin's friend

couldn't come in today,

you talk to me now.

Well, this is getting worse each minute,

now I can't get what you're saying even in Spanish.

Put the boss on.

Sorry, I don't get it.

With the queen bee, the top dog.

The bossman, the head honcho, the old shitbag that was with the Spaniard.

More respect, please, the man is French.

Frenchmen don't let South Americans insult them.

I'm on now.

So, what's up?

Where are you hiding your ass like a mole?

You're the mole, not me.

Listen to me.

In thirty minutes, you'll be where I tell you.

You're taking my brother and a bag with 200.000 dollars.

That much?

Yes, 200.000 cash if you don't want me to burn

your boss' shitty formula.

Easy, please,

remember we're being very nice to your brother.

Exactly. I've got 200.000 reasons to calm down.

To forgive that you mixed business with family.

Even when there's nothing to be forgiven.

There's an abandoned factory past the nature reserve.

Enter through the back street.

The door will be open.

See you.

I've got you.

I've got you!

We've got him!

Psst! Stop right there.

I told you to come alone.

- No, you didn't. - Yes, I did.

You didn't say alone.

I swear on my thing. I told you.

No, you never said alone.

It was obvious, man!

- Alone? - Yes.

It's just me and your brother now.

And he'll become a colander if you don't stop playing

your own version of Pokémon Go.

Easy,

holes always match.

See how well they suit him? Easy.

Hey, hey, easy.

I've got my people all around the factory waiting for my signal.

So this is how it is?

Are you familiar with the Pascal theory?

No, I don't think I know any Pascual.

Pascal was a French philosopher,

17th century. A little less rough than my boss.

He used to say it's more convenient to believe in God.

If you die and you believe in God, and he exists,

you go to heaven.

But if you don't believe in God, and he exists,

you don't go to heaven, and you get nothing.

I know of someone who'll test Pascal's theory

in his own flesh.

You're having a faith crisis now, right?

And what if I believed in God before,

but not anymore?

Then...

Argentineans always twisting everything up.

No, no, easy.

No more deaths.

That's up to you, my friend.

I have your signed contract here.

This is what you need.

Let my brother go.

Let him go.

Agustín! Show me the bills.

It's a lot of dollars.

Good.

Come up, he won't do anything to you.

He needs this.

Do you think I'm...

how do you say it here?

- Asshole. - An asshole?

Let's do something.

I come down unarmed.

You release my brother with the bag.

OK, come down.

Easy.

With tenderness,

effort and saliva...

I told you were surrounded!

Now it's your turn to test Pascal's theory.

If he doesn't kill you,

I will!

He's a genius!

Leo, wait!

Good idea, bad aim.

- What are you doing here? - Take it.

Run! Run!

I hate dishonest people.

IF YOU READ THIS YOU'RE GAY

Oh God.

Follow me!

- Oh my God. - No, no, no.

You can do it, you can. You're becoming a man today.

What's the problem now?

- Not a chance. - Pablo, are you crazy?

That's what I've been telling you!

I haven't got all day! I've got things to do!

OK. I'll do it.

The Lord and I are with you, little brother.

We'll make it.

What are you doing, Leo?

No, no, no, no!

No!

- I'm next! - No! Don't be a dumbass!

What if we go down the stairs?

Easy, easy. Are you OK? Sure?

Be careful. Don't step there. Get down.

My brother.

- Good! - Are you stealing a car?

I'm borrowing it.

It was him, not me.

Start the car!

The contract, son of a bitch!

Who are you, fucking Terminator?

Not me, asshole!

Sara!

Shalom! Stop!

Let's go!

Where did you come from?

Did you call our people?

Cavalry is here.

Did you train yourself to be a dumbhead, or you never got it?

- What time is it? - 6.15. Why

I can't touch this. We're in Sabbath and it's forbidden by the Torah.

Grab the wheel.

I can't either, it's also forbidden by the Torah!

Not you, man, you're in the back.

You, Agustín.

Yes!

Yes!

I fucking lost it.

You're crazy, Leonardo. You're going to hell.

You're crazy!

And you! Why did you follow me?

On top, with Sara, are you stupid?

Who are you, Shalom? Who do you work for?

Why do you shoot people?

It's my first time.

When did it occur to you I'm one of the bad guys?

Ah, no, he's one of the good guys.

He's one of the good guys.

He comes out with the machine gun, tat, tat, tat!

He's a one of the good guys, right.

Be quiet, or I'll kill you.

Get it?

Pussy! Pussy!

Why don't you shut your mouth, asshole?

You're gonna meet that guy in hell.

Are you OK?

That depends on your definition of "Okay".

I can't breath!

I can't! I'm claustrophobic!

I'm feeling the LCI... I'm feeling it!

Watch out. Watch out. Careful.

March 12th, 2013.

The day they Francisco was elected.

At least it didn't explode.

Why won't I keep my mouth shut?

I was going to propose to Sara.

And I can't even protect her.

Now? For real?

Now, who told you

money was gonna fix any of your problems?

Turn yourself in, Leo.

You're responsible of all this fuss.

Turn yourself in, please.

I'm jeopardizing all people in my neighborhood.

OK. I'll do it.

And then all of us will become a problem.

We're lucky if we just go to jail, Agustín.

These guys want to kill us.

The neighborhood won't be any good for you. It is what it is.

It is what it is?

I don't want to go to jail because you happen to be around dangerous people.

If you had stood by me the first time I called you,

we would've done things differently.

I told you they were coming for you!

It's not my fault you're my brother.

It's not my fault you are an irresponsible trouble-maker who was always useless.

C'mon, asshole,

turn the other cheek.

I don't even know what contract you're talking about!

That's a lie.

Hello, Mr. Minister.

I've got this girl, Sara Kreiner,

ID number 40.23...

We'll see if you voted in the last elections, pretty one.

What're you doing? I don't know anything!

That's a lie.

Pain is a weakness sign.

Pain is a humanity sign.

That's a lie.

I'm not afraid of you.

- That's a lie. - You're not afraid now,

but you will be.

It's over.

I've got the address.

It's a church, a Jewish temple, something like that.

Grinder? What's Grinder?

The contract is probably there.

Yes.

Listen to me, motherfucker.

We've got a contract. A piece of paper we don't give a shit about.

And you've got our friend, who you don't care about.

Hold on a second.

Can you repeat, please?

Listen to me, you cocksucker,

son of a fucking bitch!

I was saying...

that you need the formula,

and we want our friend.

So why don't we stop fucking around,

you send us Sara, and when she's safe and sound,

give me an address,

we send you the formula with a motorbike, a car or a taxi.

Done?

Cut her a hand.

What did he say?

He told me to cut the other hand.

No!

I'll do whatever you say, don't hurt her!

That depends on me, my friend.

She dies if I want. She lives if I want.

Your only chance

is to tell me where the contract is.

- Where is the contract? - It's hidden.

Where is the contract? Where is the contract?

At the temple, asshole.

At the temple, asshole!

Harken, all set?

It's not that simple.

Give me a couple of minutes.

So we would be the good guys, right?

So to say.

How's Yosi doing?

Pretty good.

Sara!

Sara!

Where do you think you're going in those outfits?

Don't waste my time,

don't you see I have a busy schedule?

Come, look,

it's high up, isn't it?

I transfer the intellectual rights of the aforesaid formula

to Dugès Laboratories.

My contract.

What are you reading?

This.

Where is Sara? Sara!

Sara!

Your attention, please.

We need you to calmly evacuate the building,

there's a fire alert.

What's going on here?

What are you doing?

We're not making this mess with all this people inside.

Sara!

Let her go!

I've got what's yours.

Very good, little fellow, you're starting to get it.

Now throw the bag, and maybe your girl stays alive.

I've been wanting you for a while, asshole.

You're not my type.

Don't mess with my brother!

- Oy Vey. - Give me my contract, now!

Who are you?

Son of a bitch!

No, no.

Give me the Jumash, and leave.

Mendi!

¡Shalom!

A fireman too?

Don't give him the contract, they'll kill us all!

I think they've already started.

Good-bye, midget.

Pain is a sign of weakness.

Sara!

Sara!

Life is cruel.

But not as much as Harken.

Sara!

Hang in there, Sara! I'm getting there!

You only live once.

Do you really want to waste it like this?

I'm sick of your crap.

Give me the contract, now!

And we'll be done with this shit!

Stop there or I'll burn it.

No, no! You won't.

No! No! No!

Hey, you frog!

You fucked it all up.

You'll pay for it.

I should've killed you from the start.

You

and your little whore friend.

I don't get a word you're saying.

Say hi to God on my behalf.

You don't have the balls.

Oh, no!

I did get the "whore" part.

Daughter...

Dad!

- "Daughter". - You didn't know?

No.

It's what it is.

The Jumash, dad? Did you burn it?

Your father is no fool.

I switched it for another.

And I imagine this

is very valuable.

I can think of a thousand more valuable things.

I think it's

a very wise decision.

Mr. Mendi, I, as a Jew...

Don't. Stop.

If you're Jewish,

I eat Spanish ham.

I'm proud of you.

It's over now. It's over.

No, no, no.

It's not over.

Sara,

do you want to marry me?

Yes.

Congratulations.

Mazel tov.

Bravo! Mazel tov!

Let's go.

Let the party begin.

Please, come closer,

I'd like to say a word.

First of all, I'd like to thank

Rabbi Mendi specially,

thanks so much for everything.

I want to dedicate this song to two people

I love very much:

my friends Sara

and Yosi.

To you.

Lehaim!

Lehaim!

Yosi, come up here, c'mon.

Yes, that's me.

Excuse me. Thank you.

One, two, three!

SHALOM LIBRARY

DONATED BY LEONARDO ANDRADE

You liked Sara, didn't you?

Yes. I'll have to get used to it.

I just never end up with the girl.

Me neither.

I totally understand you.

- Shalom. - Shalom.

Shalom.

We'll have to make you an honorary Jew.

How's that?

We'll have to slice your biscuit, your turkey, your salami...

- In other words... - Your bone!

It is what it is.