Original subtitles

Most days, I'm Wonder Woman.

Invincible.

But some days, I'm not.

Everyone teaches us to be tough.

But why don't they teach us to accept our vulnerabilities?

After all, who has created these glass ceilings?

We did.

Us.

Women!

We feel we cannot break through this glass ceiling.

But actually...

...if you believe...

…that there is no glass ceiling…

...then the sky is the limit.

Thank you so much.

Any questions?

Yes, Ms. Roy.

Hi, Uma.

I'm sorry but...

...did I just hear you say what I think I did?

You really think that women are hallucinating…

…about being held back by men?

All I am saying is that one needs courage to be successful.

Not excuses.

Patriarchy is not some excuse.

Women have to work twice as hard to reach half as far!

And this is the problem with millennials…

…who look at everything from a male vs female point of view.

When fighting for feminism, then yes.

Feminism is not about hating men.

Feminism means equality.

And this equality will only come…

…when we stop feeling sorry for ourselves.

Papa, I made my first headline.

Really?

Breaking news!

The dining table has brown sticky things underneath it.

Further investigations have revealed…

…that this is Ashok Rizvi Roy's booger.

Ashok?

No way Mom!

She's lying!

Mrs. Rizvi Roy, would you like to check it yourself?

No! I believe you. Thank you!

Ashok Rizvi Roy…

…would you like to say something in your defense?

When I grow up, I'm going to be a journalist.

Just like my papa.

Ah!

There are my glasses.

Uma…

Hello.

I clearly remember our first board meeting.

You said you were happy because...

...a woman was starting the company.

And now you're just ganging up against me.

This is not some bus Damini…

…where you'll find a ladies seat.

I'm not asking for favours or handouts.

I'm asking for support, woman to woman.

Support? Ya!

I'm not your mother.

And please,

don't come to me with your problems.

Come to me with your...

...solutions.

What are the solutions?

To undermine my editorial decisions?

Because the legal department is just an excuse for you to censor me.

There is one solution, Damini.

Why don't you finally...

...take responsibility for your actions.

I take full responsibility Uma!

That's why I go after the lawbreakers and offenders! You know that!

Oh…so you think you're a crusader?

You're a vigilante, girl.

There is a difference.

I'd rather be a vigilante than be someone's puppet!

Stand up for me, Uma.

That's the least you can do.

I won't report a word about this conversation...

...to our other board members.

And this…

This is me standing up for you.

Oh! Look who's here!

My baby!

Did you have fun at Dadda's? Yes!

What did you do?

One big poo and three little poo.

Oh my god! We also went to the park…

...and we went swimming.

Wow!

But nothing is as exciting as a poo.

You can never compete with a good poo, right Arya?

Here you go…

Dadda, doll house.

Oh yes! Doll house!

C'mon! C'mon!

May I go up?

Yes? Oh my God. C'mon!

Let's go before she changes her mind.

Anjana!

Hi!

Hi.

Hi.

Hi.

I'm...I'm Kavya.

Of course!

Hi Kavya…Hi…

I'm sorry, I didn't realise there was someone in the car.

That's not your fault.

I mean brown dress…

...brown car upholstery.

Who even wears brown right?

Actually, I told Varun that I will get camouflaged with the car seat

But he said that the brown really brings out the color of my eyes.

Oh really?

He said that?

Ya, I know right?

By the way, it's really nice to meet you finally…

…and I hope Arya didn't trouble you too much.

No, no, she's such a doll!

And she's got a great sense of humour…

Smart and witty and...

...she picks up things so quickly!

I mean…I know…I'm her mother.

Oh and by the way, before I forget…

She wanted me to give you the recipe of this ragi dosa…

And it's just…

Actually, it's very simple. I'm sure you know…

Only don't forget to add jaggery and butter on top.

She just…she loves that. Thanks.

Wow…friends already?

Of course.

In fact, do you want to do lunch sometime next week?

Sassy Spoon? Ya?

Ya… It's close to our office...

...and we can exchange notes about Mr Grumpy here.

He's so grumpy from the minute he wakes up!

I am not grumpy. I'm chirpy. No, of course you're not!

He's not…

Okay, so before you guys become besties and all…

…we gotta go. Bye.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye. See you.

It's so nice to meet you. You're so sweet.

What a bitch.

With inspiration like this, anyone can make six packs.

C'mon, five more.

I'm from Haryana.

Hot blood.

Give me one chance,

you won't regret it.

That's it.

Session over.

Did you get offended? Oh my god!

Die! Bastard!

Fucking bitch!

Umang, we have security footage.

There's enough evidence.

They could sue us for willfully harming a person.

That wasn't wilful.

He forced himself. Didn't you see that?

Everyone knows what's going on with you and Amit.

So he must've thought you're easily available.

You can't demand respect, Umang.

You have to earn it.

I don't want respect from these fuckers.

Tell them to keep their hands off me and their junk in their pants.

Then, perhaps, you should also learn how to keep your legs together.

You don't like that you're a woman?

Do you hate yourself for it?

Didn't your parents love you growing up?

Sorry, what?

Please transfer my salary to my account.

I quit.

Umang, come back here.

Excuse me, where is the beginner's ballet class?

3rd door.

Ok. Thank you.

By the way, parents are not allowed to stay with their kids.

I should hope so.

Hi.

Hi. This is the ballet class, right?

Yes. The class will start in 5 minutes.

Please leave your child there.

What child?

Kid.

Kit?

Kid.

Of course, I have my kit!

No ma'am, kid.

Good afternoon, sir!

Good afternoon.

New ballet teacher?

She looks stupid to me.

I don't like her.

I'm going to tell my mom.

I'm not your ballet teacher, I'm Siddhi Patel.

And I've also enrolled for this class.

Ma'am, this is beginner's ballet.

So? I'm no Anna Pavlova.

I mean for kids between 6 and 10.

What?! Yes.

But…but your website didn't mention that!

God, Sneha's going to kill me.

Shit! I even sent my driver back!

What do I do here now?

Sir, but why can't she also take class with us?

No, but... Yes!

Sir, please!

Okay, okay, quickly go change.

And 5, 6, 7, 8 and point...

Bring it back.

Plie.

And up.

And up 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8...

And open.

3, 4…Plie.

Repeat.

And point.

And back.

Plie.

And...releve.

2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8.

And open 2, 3, 4...

There's no glass ceiling.

We're all just imagining our problems! She is so fake!

You can't even tell she's faking it! She calls herself a liberal...

...but she thinks like a conservative!

Even the colour of her eye is fake! What is that!

This is me standing up for you, she says!

If liberals are like this I wonder what a conservative is!

Her nose is definitely fake!

There is no glass ceiling!

This is a woman's world, where men take women's last names!

Ladies.

Getting drunk in the middle of a workday.

I'm confused. Should I be happy or worried?

Worried. Happy.

Muddied.

Bloodied.

Ok guys,

I know that currently the villain in your life…

…is another woman. Just like Sneha is mine.

But.

To tell you the truth…

Your cribbing? It makes my world go round.

I mean, whenever I hear you guys blabber…

I feel like I'm home.

And that…all is well with the world.

Awww.

All is well with the world!

Cheers!

The board, our own people, want to censor us.

So what should we do?

Should we be scared?

Should we just sit idle?

Never.

We are going to go all out with the kind of...

...journalism Investigator.com is known for.

Bold, shocking, ballsy fucking stories!

We are going to investigate the hell out of Investigator.com!

Are you guys with me?

Yes.

Louder people!

Yes!

Good!

So give me those fucking stories!

I have one…

Walia’s extradition. Who is protecting him?

Meth. The new weight loss drug.

How deep is the doctor-cops-drug dealer nexus?

On one hand,

we're becoming the world's number one rape country...

and on the other hand,

women can’t even protest against rape...

without being violently attacked!

That's our story Asha.

Let's give women a voice to express their dissent.

Let us be their voice.

#nocountryforwomen

Asha…you’re going to lead the story.

Get to work!

Umang.

Umang!

Umang.

Please spare me. I don't want any advice.

Not advice. I've come to congratulate you.

You're a rock solid woman.

Truly, respect.

Are you playing with me?

I'm in no mood for a joke.

There's a private client.

Very elite.

She has rejected everyone.

She needs a hardcore trainer like you for personal training.

They say they need a personal trainer...

...but they end up treating you like a personal assistant.

It's a lot of money.

And you'll have to travel with the client as well.

Set life.

Give me the number.

It's a high profile client.

I'll pass on your message to her team.

They'll get in touch with you.

You know, you don't look it but you're a pretty stand-up guy.

Was that an abuse or a compliment?

You're the one who comes to me to get tortured!

Kavya, where are the depositions?

What? I am talking to you!

Ma'am, me?

Yes.

But ma'am, I'm Prachi.

And that's what I said.

No, ma'am. You said Kavya.

I'm…I'm so sorry.

Prachi, right?

You know Kavya was my previous associate so...

...just a little confusion.

Can I have the deposition, please?

Sure ma'am.

Two weeks.

My periods are two weeks late.

They're never late.

I'm not pregnant.

Unless it's an immaculate conception.

Don't worry, you're not pregnant.

Thank God!

Not that I have a problem with babies.

I don't mind babies. I like babies.

But tell me something…

…why do all women need to feel maternal?

I think perpetuating the myth of the maternal instinct...

...actually harms women.

And impairs their growth.

Don't you think?

I know I'm a gynac but as a doctor can I ask you a question?

Sure.

When was the first time you started exhibiting...

...signs of compulsive behavior?

Like this?

I just don't...

You know what…as a Muslim, I've never felt like a minority.

But as a woman I have.

Amina, c'mon...

Arundhati Roy has just now won the Booker.

Ya…Diana Haydon is Ms. World.

Phoolan Devi just got elected to parliament.

Ya… Indian women are everywhere.

Please.

Three women amongst a million men.

And we should celebrate!

We can't even sell a car without a half naked woman.

Women are looked upon as sexual beings!

Look at the kind of songs we have.

"You bloody sexy thing!"

Damini, what do you have to say to this?

C'mon, Mahesh. She's just a child. What would she know?

No, no, we don't differentiate in this house. Right?

Mama…I'm hungry.

Food's ready in the kitchen, sweetheart.

Go have it. Good girl.

So I'm going to recommend…

…a therapist.

A therapist? Yep.

As in a shrink?

I don't need a shrink.

It's my shitty hormones and vagina that need fixing.

Not my brain.

Your vagina is fine.

It's perfect.

To a great first date.

To a great first date.

Proost!

Proost means cheers in Dutch.

Oh...

Okay…

You know, I mean I just love to travel.

Like especially since I got that new chartered airplane.

You know my friend's dad also owns one.

Yeah well, you know, that's the difference.

I'm a self-made man, Sindhi.

Siddhi.

Siddhi, ya of course.

Look, to be honest Siddhi…

Everytime I come to India…

…my parents set me up with some eligible girl.

But somehow I've never really found someone who truly gets me.

Like the real me.

You know what I'm saying?

I think I need to meet someone who knows where I've come from…

…and where I'm going.

Hibiscus. Have you heard of us?

Not really.

But, you know, my friend Damini? She has her own company…

Yeah, well I mean, I'm sure that's great for her here in Mumbai…

…but babe, you're really nothing till you haven't...

...made it big in Silicon Valley.

I mean, c'mon…

Oh…okay.

It's like, you know, Mark is my neighbor.

Mark?

Zuckerberg? Facebook?

Really?! Ya.

So do you guys like hang out and stuff?

Well, we go to the same coffee shop.

So do Salman and I but we're not friends.

Rushdie?

Khan.

Salman Khan?

I hate Bollywood.

You know, as a kid, when I used to travel to America…

…I used to love sticking my head out of the sunroof.

Driver, sunroof.

Really?!

Ya.

God! Your feet are so beautiful!

If your feet were on a dating app…

…you'd get maximum right swipes baby!

Owww! What the fuck!

Oh my God! I'm so sorry!

I really didn't mean to… shit! Blood! Blood!

I think you've broken my nose, you psycho!

Oops.

What am I going to do? I love my nose!

According to Leonardo Da Vinci's golden ratio…

…my nose is perfect for my face!

Listen, relax! It's just a nose bleed!

What?! Are you crazy?! What if it's permanently damaged?!

God!

What are you doing?!

I don't have a tissue but here…use this.

Oh my God. No!

You want me to put this on my face?!

It's not used.

Driver, stop the car.

Seriously?

Shut up!

What did you tell Sneha?

Simple.

That Pawan is a non vegetarian.

And will expect the same from me after marriage.

Shame…

John Mayer has said 'My body is a wonderland'.

How can I just defile… Ooh! Chicken wings!

By the way, Kavya called Varun Mr. Grumpy.

Anj, you're still obsessing with that girl.

She is playing a game with me and I will not…

Shit!

Woah!

I'm so sorry. My bad!

Nice catch, Jeh.

Guys! Samara Kapoor!

Guess who yelled at her…

And I still feel shit about it.

She is my childhood crush.

I love her!

I mean she's bubbly, she's pretty, she's hot…

I wish I could take her to the fields...

...and do some body weight exercises with her!

One more time.

I've got the trick now. Siddhi, c'mon do something.

Something.

Sneha!

Look up and smile bitches!

Hey, all good?

What?

Nothing.

Hey, can I ask you a question?

Ya...

How come you've been hanging back here lately?

Is that a problem?

No, no. Not at all.

Of course not. I'm...

I'm just curious.

I've just been stressed with work lately…

And I guess I don't feel like going back...

...to that empty house all alone anymore.

The walls feel like they're...

...closing in on me.

You know what I mean?

Trust me, I do.

The Japanese have invented something.

It's called the boyfriend-girlfriend coat.

So you wear it and…

then it hugs you and…

...asks you how your day was.

I should leave. No wait.

Hang on.

What?

Japanese single malt.

To the dichotomy of living alone.

Can't live with someone…

Can't live without someone?

Cheers. Cheers.

I love it.

Hi Anj…

Hey…

She sleeping?

Ya...

What's going on?

You want to come in?

No, I'm sorry I…

…I shouldn't be disturbing you at this hour.

Look...

Kavya's not home.

Please.

Just come inside.

Don't be so formal.

Coffee?

The one thing I did well…

...when we were married.

No, I'm fine.

Come.

Actually, we were watching TV…

…there were these cartoons on.

And she fell asleep here so... It's…

It's okay.

Sit.

Sometimes I can't believe she's ours.

Remember as a baby how she would sleep?

Those little froggy legs.

And her arms by the side of her head.

She's too beautiful.

And we created that.

Can you imagine?

We.

The two of us.

Two complete nutcases…

…created that.

Shit. I totally forgot to tell you.

Kavya had written down that dosa recipe.

And she said to give it to you.

You know, I think I'll just book a cab.

I have like a 9am meeting.

Ya? Ya.

You sure?

Rish.

Hi…

Hi, hottie.

When did you get into town?

Just this weekend.

A message would've been nice.

Ya but this is so much more spontaneous.

And…

Sexy.

Did you come?

Nope.

No?

Okay...

Every time.

Every time.

How's work?

Same old, same old.

Always the secretive Damini.

Rishabh…

Let me stay tonight…

You know me. You know how I am…

Ya...I know.

I know.