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- W-O-R-K.
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00:01:01,604 --> 00:01:02,396
Work.
3
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Today we're going to share
what our parents do for...
4
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- Work!
5
00:01:08,569 --> 00:01:10,988
- Work!
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- My mommy is a doctor.
7
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- My daddy is a truck driver.
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- My mom's a teacher.
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- And your dad?
10
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- My dad...
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He's...
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A liar.
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- A liar?
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Oh, I'm sure you don't
mean a liar.
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- Well, he wears a suit and goes to court
16
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and talks to the judge.
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- Oh! Oh! I see.
18
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You mean he's a lawyer.
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- Hey, Fletcher.
How'd it go in there?
20
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- Just another victory
for the wrongly accused.
21
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- Yeah right.
22
00:01:51,362 --> 00:01:53,322
- Mr. Reede, great job sir.
Do you want your coat back?
23
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- No, I'm sure you'll be
needing it again and again.
24
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- Mr. Reede, do you have a moment?
25
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- I'm sorry, I'm very late.
It's my day to be with my son.
26
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- A couple of reporters wanna talk to you
27
00:02:01,330 --> 00:02:02,790
about your big win today.
28
00:02:02,790 --> 00:02:04,875
- Oh, yeah? How's my hair?
29
00:02:04,875 --> 00:02:06,168
- Fabulous. You look great.
30
00:02:22,143 --> 00:02:23,144
- What time is it?
31
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- I'm sure your dad just
got held up in court again.
32
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- Dad!
33
00:02:35,865 --> 00:02:37,283
- Maximilian!
34
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Hey!
35
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How you doing, creep?
36
00:02:44,123 --> 00:02:44,957
- Good.
37
00:02:46,709 --> 00:02:50,254
- Me too, except my arm has
really been bothering me lately.
38
00:02:50,254 --> 00:02:52,256
- Oh, no, dad!
39
00:02:52,256 --> 00:02:53,507
- Oh, yeah!
40
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It's becoming a claw!
41
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Nothing can stop the claw!
42
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Run, boy! Run! Save yourself!
43
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- Do the claw to mom,
dad! Do the claw to mom!
44
00:03:12,693 --> 00:03:16,489
- Uh-oh! You found the
claw's only weakness.
45
00:03:16,489 --> 00:03:19,575
Sub-zero temperatures!
46
00:03:20,868 --> 00:03:23,412
- So, did you have any
trouble finding the place?
47
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- Okay, I'm late. I'm
sorry. I ran out of gas.
48
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The gauge is broken or something.
49
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Rough neighborhood, too.
50
00:03:30,920 --> 00:03:33,381
It's a good thing I was
wearing neutral gang colors.
51
00:03:33,381 --> 00:03:36,092
I might've had to pull out
my nine and bust a cap.
52
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- Well, they would never
hurt you, Fletcher,
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00:03:41,180 --> 00:03:42,765
you're their lawyer.
54
00:03:42,765 --> 00:03:46,435
- Oh! That was below the
belt. Try Keep the gloves up.
55
00:03:46,435 --> 00:03:48,688
- Mom, dad's taking me to see wrestling!
56
00:03:48,688 --> 00:03:50,189
- Fletcher!
57
00:03:50,189 --> 00:03:51,649
- Audrey!
58
00:03:51,649 --> 00:03:53,776
- Why do you have to take
him to see that stuff?
59
00:03:53,776 --> 00:03:55,152
It's very violent.
60
00:03:55,152 --> 00:03:59,323
- The boy must grow to
be a warrior.
61
00:03:59,323 --> 00:04:01,367
Who better to guide him than Rick Rude
62
00:04:01,367 --> 00:04:04,704
and Randy "Macho-Man"
Savage in the Cage of Death?
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00:04:07,248 --> 00:04:08,457
Good!
64
00:04:08,457 --> 00:04:09,667
- Jerry, how's it going?
65
00:04:10,584 --> 00:04:13,295
- Hey, Gipper! Look at you.
66
00:04:13,295 --> 00:04:15,506
You look like you grow by the minute!
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00:04:15,506 --> 00:04:16,841
- Fletcher, pleasure to see you.
68
00:04:16,841 --> 00:04:17,675
- Hey.
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00:04:17,675 --> 00:04:18,926
- Hi, honey!
- Hi.
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00:04:20,845 --> 00:04:25,808
- Wow, that was a nice
image. Deleted.
71
00:04:26,267 --> 00:04:27,643
- I have some more boxes for you.
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00:04:27,643 --> 00:04:28,936
- Oh! You're an angel.
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00:04:28,936 --> 00:04:30,521
- Boxes?
- Yeah.
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00:04:30,521 --> 00:04:32,148
Remember? I told you a few weeks ago.
75
00:04:32,148 --> 00:04:33,816
Jerry's moving to Boston on Friday.
76
00:04:33,816 --> 00:04:38,863
- Oh, right! The job, the
thing... What do you do again?
77
00:04:38,863 --> 00:04:39,989
- Hospital administrator.
78
00:04:39,989 --> 00:04:41,282
- Right! Right!
79
00:04:41,282 --> 00:04:43,033
- Well, the boxes are in my car.
80
00:04:43,033 --> 00:04:44,785
- Oh, those can wait.
81
00:04:44,785 --> 00:04:47,204
I made this young man a promise, didn't I?
82
00:04:48,831 --> 00:04:50,166
Got time to throw a few?
83
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- Sure!
84
00:04:51,000 --> 00:04:53,627
- Come on, then!
85
00:04:53,627 --> 00:04:55,171
- I forgot the boyfriend was moving.
86
00:04:55,171 --> 00:04:59,175
- Jerry! His name is Jerry!
And yes, he's moving.
87
00:04:59,175 --> 00:05:01,218
- I'm sorry, I hated him a lot less
88
00:05:01,218 --> 00:05:04,013
than your other boyfriends,
it wasn't serious, was it?
89
00:05:04,013 --> 00:05:05,931
- Semi-serious, yes.
90
00:05:05,931 --> 00:05:10,019
- You guys aren't, you know...
91
00:05:13,022 --> 00:05:15,441
- I've been dating him for
seven months. What do you think?
92
00:05:15,441 --> 00:05:17,026
- Really? Ew!
93
00:05:17,026 --> 00:05:19,028
I was hoping after being married to me
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00:05:19,028 --> 00:05:20,154
you'd have no strength left.
95
00:05:20,154 --> 00:05:22,239
- Well, you have to remember
that when we were married,
96
00:05:22,239 --> 00:05:24,492
I wasn't having sex nearly
as often as you were?
97
00:05:24,492 --> 00:05:25,993
- Ouch!
98
00:05:25,993 --> 00:05:27,995
And the ref takes a point away.
99
00:05:27,995 --> 00:05:29,789
- Yeah.
- Oh! Oh! And Out!
100
00:05:29,789 --> 00:05:30,915
- Yeah! Whoo!
101
00:05:30,915 --> 00:05:32,082
- Max is gonna miss him.
102
00:05:33,793 --> 00:05:34,585
- I'll be here.
103
00:05:35,711 --> 00:05:36,545
- Ready?
104
00:05:37,922 --> 00:05:39,298
Yeah!
105
00:05:39,298 --> 00:05:40,216
Play ball.
106
00:05:40,216 --> 00:05:42,092
- Max, come on. We've gotta go.
107
00:05:43,344 --> 00:05:45,429
- Dad, are we really going to wrestling?
108
00:05:45,429 --> 00:05:47,014
- Absolutely, Max Factor.
109
00:05:47,014 --> 00:05:49,433
We just have to stop by
the office for a minute.
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00:05:49,433 --> 00:05:51,060
- Excuse me, sir. Any spare change?
111
00:05:51,060 --> 00:05:52,770
- Oh, I'm sorry. I'm all out.
112
00:05:53,854 --> 00:05:54,688
-I can'tdo it.
113
00:05:55,564 --> 00:05:57,775
- Fred, it's your duty to present
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00:05:57,775 --> 00:05:59,985
the strongest case possible.
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00:05:59,985 --> 00:06:02,571
- The strongest case possible
consistent with the truth.
116
00:06:02,571 --> 00:06:04,532
- Will you let the judge
decide what's true?
117
00:06:04,532 --> 00:06:08,410
That's what he gets paid
for. You get paid to win.
118
00:06:08,410 --> 00:06:10,996
- If you insist that I take it to trial,
119
00:06:10,996 --> 00:06:14,834
I will represent Mrs. Cole
aggressively and ethically,
120
00:06:14,834 --> 00:06:17,586
but, Miranda, I won't lie.
121
00:06:19,004 --> 00:06:22,049
- Then we'll just have
to find someone who will.
122
00:06:23,926 --> 00:06:26,595
- 21st floor. Men's wear.
123
00:06:31,183 --> 00:06:32,560
- Hi, Mr. Reede!
124
00:06:32,560 --> 00:06:34,103
- Whoa! Hey.
125
00:06:35,271 --> 00:06:36,814
Did you do something to your hair?
126
00:06:36,814 --> 00:06:39,275
- It's a bit extreme, isn't it?
127
00:06:39,275 --> 00:06:43,153
- No! I mean that's... That's
the thing nowadays, right?
128
00:06:43,153 --> 00:06:45,573
- Well, he said it would
accent my facial features.
129
00:06:45,573 --> 00:06:46,490
- Well, that's what it does!
130
00:06:46,490 --> 00:06:48,576
It completely accents
your facial features.
131
00:06:49,785 --> 00:06:53,289
We're just gonna go to
my office now.
132
00:06:56,166 --> 00:06:57,209
- Hey, Fletcher.
133
00:06:57,209 --> 00:06:59,086
- Hey, Pete. You losing a little weight?
134
00:06:59,086 --> 00:07:00,880
- I don't know. Maybe.
135
00:07:00,880 --> 00:07:03,591
- Looks and personality.
A double-threat guy.
136
00:07:03,591 --> 00:07:06,010
- Hey, Mr. Reede.
- Hey, man.
137
00:07:06,010 --> 00:07:07,052
- It's Randy.
138
00:07:07,052 --> 00:07:08,679
- Yeah, I know.
139
00:07:08,679 --> 00:07:10,931
- Taking lunch orders Mr. Reede. Anything?
140
00:07:10,931 --> 00:07:12,182
- No, thanks.
141
00:07:13,434 --> 00:07:17,062
I had so much for breakfast,
I'm just about ready to pop.
142
00:07:17,062 --> 00:07:18,939
I mean, I'm full.
143
00:07:18,939 --> 00:07:20,357
- Okay.
144
00:07:20,357 --> 00:07:21,400
Great.
145
00:07:25,321 --> 00:07:26,530
- Max!
146
00:07:26,530 --> 00:07:28,157
- Hi, Greta.
147
00:07:28,157 --> 00:07:29,909
- Hey, what's new?
148
00:07:29,909 --> 00:07:31,410
- Well, it's my birthday's tomorrow,
149
00:07:31,410 --> 00:07:32,745
and we're having a party and everything.
150
00:07:32,745 --> 00:07:34,830
- Wow! I am sure that your daddy
151
00:07:34,830 --> 00:07:36,790
has got you something wonderful.
152
00:07:36,790 --> 00:07:37,875
- Yeah?
153
00:07:37,875 --> 00:07:41,295
- Yeah! You bet!
154
00:07:41,295 --> 00:07:42,963
Listen, kiddo, why don't you go
155
00:07:42,963 --> 00:07:44,298
play in my office for a minute?
156
00:07:44,298 --> 00:07:46,550
Sue somebody for everything they've got.
157
00:07:46,550 --> 00:07:49,553
Maybe you can send a fax
to one of your girlfriends.
158
00:07:49,553 --> 00:07:50,804
Hey, sorry.
159
00:07:51,680 --> 00:07:54,516
Damn it! I completely forgot.
160
00:07:54,516 --> 00:07:55,726
- Oh. What a surprise?
161
00:07:56,810 --> 00:07:59,730
- You are a saint. I
should buy you a gift.
162
00:07:59,730 --> 00:08:01,273
- You did.
163
00:08:01,273 --> 00:08:03,192
- I always do the classy thing. Any calls?
164
00:08:03,192 --> 00:08:05,527
- Judge Rollins' clerk
he needs your filing.
165
00:08:05,527 --> 00:08:06,654
- Tell him it's in the mail.
166
00:08:06,654 --> 00:08:08,364
- Right, you'll do it next week.
167
00:08:08,364 --> 00:08:11,909
Mr. McKinley phoned to
confirm your meeting tomorrow.
168
00:08:11,909 --> 00:08:14,828
- Strep throat. No, some kind
of virus, what's going around?
169
00:08:14,828 --> 00:08:15,746
- Asian flu?
170
00:08:15,746 --> 00:08:16,956
- Good one.
171
00:08:16,956 --> 00:08:18,332
- And your mother called.
172
00:08:18,332 --> 00:08:19,750
- I'm on vacation.
173
00:08:19,750 --> 00:08:20,876
- It's your fifth week.
174
00:08:20,876 --> 00:08:22,252
- Snowed in, phones are down.
175
00:08:22,252 --> 00:08:23,837
- Break mother's heart. Done.
176
00:08:23,837 --> 00:08:26,382
Now, that's it, except
Miranda's looking for you.
177
00:08:27,967 --> 00:08:30,052
- How much ass do I have to kiss
178
00:08:30,052 --> 00:08:32,429
to make partner in this damn place?
179
00:08:32,429 --> 00:08:35,474
Tell her I broke my
leg and had to be shot.
180
00:08:35,474 --> 00:08:37,810
- Why don't you tell her yourself?
181
00:08:37,810 --> 00:08:41,271
- And then send out a notice
of judgment on my win today!
182
00:08:41,271 --> 00:08:42,398
- I'll get right on it.
183
00:08:43,399 --> 00:08:48,362
- Miranda! Hey, I didn't see
you. You look beautiful today.
184
00:08:49,405 --> 00:08:51,740
Here! I bought you a gift.
185
00:08:51,740 --> 00:08:56,495
- Oh! Thanks. I heard about
your victory, congratulations.
186
00:08:56,495 --> 00:08:58,080
You know, you're making
quite an impression
187
00:08:58,080 --> 00:08:59,456
on the partnership committee.
188
00:09:00,374 --> 00:09:03,877
- Oh, that's right! You
folks are meeting again soon.
189
00:09:03,877 --> 00:09:05,337
I've just been keeping myself so busy,
190
00:09:05,337 --> 00:09:07,965
I haven't even thought about it.
191
00:09:09,717 --> 00:09:12,428
Anyway, I have a client in my office.
192
00:09:12,428 --> 00:09:14,096
Better not keep him waiting.
193
00:09:14,096 --> 00:09:15,347
- Actually, Fletcher,
194
00:09:15,347 --> 00:09:17,474
something rather important
has just come up.
195
00:09:18,475 --> 00:09:20,769
You're not busy tonight, are you?
196
00:09:28,527 --> 00:09:29,987
- We're not going, are we?
197
00:09:43,751 --> 00:09:46,628
- Audrey, you know how
there are moments in life
198
00:09:46,628 --> 00:09:47,921
that you know are critical.
199
00:09:49,006 --> 00:09:50,966
And choices that have to be made,
200
00:09:50,966 --> 00:09:53,427
upon which all one's future
happiness will depend?
201
00:09:54,511 --> 00:09:56,180
Well, this is one of those moments.
202
00:09:58,307 --> 00:10:00,059
- What are you trying to say?
203
00:10:01,935 --> 00:10:02,895
- Will you marry me?
204
00:10:08,400 --> 00:10:09,485
- You're moving.
- I know.
205
00:10:09,485 --> 00:10:10,402
I'm moving to Boston, but I want
206
00:10:10,402 --> 00:10:12,196
you and Max to come with me.
207
00:10:12,196 --> 00:10:14,239
Audrey, I've been giving
this a lot of thought.
208
00:10:14,239 --> 00:10:15,741
And you know I'm not prone to wild,
209
00:10:15,741 --> 00:10:18,619
spontaneous flights of
romantic fancy.
210
00:10:18,619 --> 00:10:19,745
But the thought of you and I together
211
00:10:19,745 --> 00:10:21,997
just makes too much sense to ignore.
212
00:10:21,997 --> 00:10:23,832
Now, I'm ready, I think you're ready,
213
00:10:23,832 --> 00:10:28,253
I love Max, you love Max, it's
right, it fits.
214
00:10:28,253 --> 00:10:30,130
So what do you say?
215
00:10:48,023 --> 00:10:51,527
- Hey, creepy. Happy birthday.
216
00:10:51,527 --> 00:10:53,612
How old are you now, 22, 23?
217
00:10:53,612 --> 00:10:55,572
- I'm five, dad.
218
00:10:55,572 --> 00:10:57,074
- Okay.
219
00:10:57,074 --> 00:10:59,868
Return the beer keg.
220
00:10:59,868 --> 00:11:03,038
Cancel the dancing girls.
221
00:11:04,540 --> 00:11:06,250
I don't know what I'm gonna do.
222
00:11:06,250 --> 00:11:09,044
I feel completely unprepared for this.
223
00:11:09,044 --> 00:11:11,672
You see, I bought you a
present, but last night,
224
00:11:13,298 --> 00:11:14,591
I accidentally swallowed it.
225
00:11:14,591 --> 00:11:17,010
- Dad, it's in your belly!
226
00:11:17,010 --> 00:11:17,803
- Scalpel.
227
00:11:18,762 --> 00:11:21,223
I hope it's not partially digested!
228
00:11:21,223 --> 00:11:23,308
Look out!
229
00:11:23,308 --> 00:11:24,226
- Cool!
230
00:11:24,226 --> 00:11:25,144
- Cool!
231
00:11:25,144 --> 00:11:26,728
- What is it?
232
00:11:26,728 --> 00:11:29,815
- It's a surprise.
233
00:11:29,815 --> 00:11:31,608
All right, it's a pony. Just open it!
234
00:11:32,651 --> 00:11:35,112
I'm gonna help, ‘cause I can't stand it!
235
00:11:37,990 --> 00:11:39,408
- Baseball stuff!
236
00:11:39,408 --> 00:11:41,702
- Baseball stuff!
237
00:11:41,702 --> 00:11:43,162
- Cool!
238
00:11:43,162 --> 00:11:45,330
Can we play? I'll be Nomo.
239
00:11:45,330 --> 00:11:48,000
You can be Jose Canseco. Can
we play dad? Can we play?
240
00:11:48,000 --> 00:11:49,668
- Absolutely.
241
00:11:49,668 --> 00:11:50,669
- Yay!
242
00:11:50,669 --> 00:11:53,463
- Right after
your party tonight,
243
00:11:53,463 --> 00:11:55,382
we'll do it, you and me.
244
00:11:57,259 --> 00:12:00,512
I just have to really
concentrate on this right now.
245
00:12:24,119 --> 00:12:24,912
- Hi!
246
00:12:26,496 --> 00:12:27,956
Hey!
247
00:12:27,956 --> 00:12:29,499
Happy birthday.
248
00:12:29,499 --> 00:12:30,709
- Thanks, mom.
249
00:12:30,709 --> 00:12:33,253
- Happy birthday, Max!
250
00:12:33,253 --> 00:12:38,008
One, two, three, four,
five, and one for good luck!
251
00:12:38,008 --> 00:12:39,635
- He struck the child. Did you see that?
252
00:12:39,635 --> 00:12:41,678
- Look at what Dad got me!
253
00:12:41,678 --> 00:12:42,763
- Whoa!
254
00:12:42,763 --> 00:12:44,598
Great!
255
00:12:44,598 --> 00:12:46,892
Hey, you know what, I
have my glove in the car.
256
00:12:46,892 --> 00:12:48,143
Maybe we can stop at the park
257
00:12:48,143 --> 00:12:50,062
on the way home and play catch.
258
00:12:50,062 --> 00:12:51,688
And then tonight we can rub oil in it
259
00:12:51,688 --> 00:12:53,398
and wrap a big rubber band around it.
260
00:12:53,398 --> 00:12:56,860
It'll be great. Hey, great gift, dad!
261
00:12:56,860 --> 00:12:58,487
- Thanks, son.
262
00:12:58,487 --> 00:13:00,989
I'm so glad my gift could
bring those two together.
263
00:13:00,989 --> 00:13:03,325
My plan to phase myself
out is almost complete.
264
00:13:05,202 --> 00:13:07,329
- Something's come up,
and we need to talk.
265
00:13:07,329 --> 00:13:10,040
- Come on, mom. I wanna go play!
266
00:13:10,040 --> 00:13:11,583
- And, actually, it's kind of important,
267
00:13:11,583 --> 00:13:13,252
so maybe we could talk tonight?
268
00:13:13,252 --> 00:13:14,544
- Tonight?
269
00:13:14,544 --> 00:13:17,089
- Yes. Max's birthday party.
270
00:13:17,089 --> 00:13:19,675
- Oh! Yeah. Sure, of course.
271
00:13:19,675 --> 00:13:21,468
We'll talk then. Great!
272
00:13:23,762 --> 00:13:25,430
Maximus! I'm outta here.
273
00:13:25,430 --> 00:13:26,473
- Bye, dad.
274
00:13:26,473 --> 00:13:28,433
- Jerry, enjoy my wife.
275
00:13:44,491 --> 00:13:45,284
- Well,
276
00:13:46,451 --> 00:13:49,788
this is good, this is really smart.
277
00:13:49,788 --> 00:13:50,622
- Thank you.
278
00:13:50,622 --> 00:13:53,875
- Only, well, it's not true, I mean,
279
00:13:53,875 --> 00:13:56,086
does that present a problem?
280
00:13:58,005 --> 00:13:59,923
- Mrs. Cole, the only problem here
281
00:13:59,923 --> 00:14:02,759
is that after you've provided
years of faithful service
282
00:14:02,759 --> 00:14:05,095
and loving support of
raising his children...
283
00:14:05,095 --> 00:14:05,887
They are his?
284
00:14:07,014 --> 00:14:09,725
- Oh, yeah, yeah. One for sure.
285
00:14:11,643 --> 00:14:14,438
- After all that, your
husband want to denying you
286
00:14:14,438 --> 00:14:15,897
a fair share of the marital assets,
287
00:14:15,897 --> 00:14:17,941
based on one single act of indiscretion.
288
00:14:17,941 --> 00:14:18,775
- Seven.
289
00:14:18,775 --> 00:14:19,651
- Pardon me?
290
00:14:19,651 --> 00:14:22,612
- Seven single acts of indiscretion.
291
00:14:23,947 --> 00:14:25,991
- Seven acts of indiscretion,
292
00:14:25,991 --> 00:14:28,327
only one of which he has any evidence of,
293
00:14:28,327 --> 00:14:32,164
and all of which he
himself is responsible for.
294
00:14:32,164 --> 00:14:33,248
- He is?
295
00:14:33,248 --> 00:14:34,333
- Mrs. Cole.
296
00:14:35,292 --> 00:14:37,044
You're the victim here.
297
00:14:37,044 --> 00:14:39,254
The wife of a cold, distant workaholic.
298
00:14:39,254 --> 00:14:42,007
Starved for affection. Driven
into the arms of another man!
299
00:14:42,007 --> 00:14:44,009
- Seven.
- Yeah. Whatever!
300
00:14:44,009 --> 00:14:46,636
You're not trying to denying
him what is rightfully his.
301
00:14:46,636 --> 00:14:49,181
All you're insisting on is
what is rightfully yours.
302
00:14:49,181 --> 00:14:53,060
- Yeah
- And maybe a fraction more.
303
00:14:53,060 --> 00:14:55,562
I think you're bending over backwards.
304
00:14:55,562 --> 00:14:57,230
- Yeah.
305
00:14:57,230 --> 00:15:00,692
Well, I did offer to give him
joint custody of the kids.
306
00:15:00,692 --> 00:15:03,862
He is, after all, a wonderful father.
307
00:15:03,862 --> 00:15:05,238
- And how does he repay you?
308
00:15:06,573 --> 00:15:09,409
By dragging you through a
painful litigation process!
309
00:15:09,409 --> 00:15:13,372
No! No! No! No! This can't happen!
310
00:15:13,372 --> 00:15:14,706
With all due respect,
311
00:15:14,706 --> 00:15:16,833
this isn't about you and Mr. Cole anymore.
312
00:15:16,833 --> 00:15:18,752
This is about all women.
313
00:15:18,752 --> 00:15:20,670
Where would Tina Turner be right now,
314
00:15:20,670 --> 00:15:21,922
if she'd rolled over and said,
315
00:15:21,922 --> 00:15:25,634
"Hit me again, Ike, and
put some stank on it."
316
00:15:25,634 --> 00:15:28,011
Rolling on the river,
that's where she'd be.
317
00:15:28,011 --> 00:15:29,763
But she's beyond Thunder dome,
318
00:15:29,763 --> 00:15:32,307
because she decided to send a message.
319
00:15:32,307 --> 00:15:34,393
Wake up, sisters!
320
00:15:34,393 --> 00:15:35,185
There's no
321
00:15:37,145 --> 00:15:40,982
such thing as a weaker sex!
322
00:15:40,982 --> 00:15:43,110
- Oh!
323
00:15:43,110 --> 00:15:46,154
You know what? You're right, Mr. Reede.
324
00:15:46,154 --> 00:15:48,990
I am tired of getting kicked around!
325
00:15:48,990 --> 00:15:50,242
- Good for you!
326
00:15:51,618 --> 00:15:53,203
- Thank you,
327
00:15:53,203 --> 00:15:55,497
I am so grateful
328
00:15:55,497 --> 00:15:58,959
to have an attorney I can trust.
329
00:16:05,590 --> 00:16:07,509
- Oh, you are good.
330
00:16:07,509 --> 00:16:10,762
You are very, very good.
331
00:16:12,722 --> 00:16:14,391
You know, the Cole case is worth a
332
00:16:14,391 --> 00:16:16,518
truckload of money to this firm.
333
00:16:16,518 --> 00:16:19,771
If you win, I guarantee
you'll make partner.
334
00:16:19,771 --> 00:16:20,564
- Oh.
335
00:16:22,190 --> 00:16:22,983
- In fact,
336
00:16:24,860 --> 00:16:26,903
how would you like to make
337
00:16:26,903 --> 00:16:28,196
a partner right now?
338
00:16:29,906 --> 00:16:32,075
- Oh, I don't know, I mean, I should...
339
00:16:39,583 --> 00:16:43,086
7 Happy, happy, happy,
happy, happy, happy, happy *
340
00:16:48,967 --> 00:16:51,678
- So, honey, have you...
341
00:16:51,678 --> 00:16:54,389
Have you thought about, you
know, what we talked about?
342
00:16:55,265 --> 00:16:56,141
- Yeah.
- Great.
343
00:16:56,141 --> 00:16:57,559
- I can't go.
344
00:16:57,559 --> 00:16:59,311
- What? Why not?
345
00:16:59,311 --> 00:17:01,188
- Well, because of Max.
346
00:17:01,188 --> 00:17:03,106
- Oh, but he'll love it there.
347
00:17:03,106 --> 00:17:05,317
I'm gonna take him to Fenway Park.
348
00:17:05,317 --> 00:17:07,486
There's hiking and camping and--
349
00:17:07,486 --> 00:17:11,448
- Well, really, it's Fletcher.
350
00:17:11,448 --> 00:17:13,992
- Fletcher? I mean, come on, honey.
351
00:17:13,992 --> 00:17:16,411
He wouldn't even come over
unless you reminded him.
352
00:17:16,411 --> 00:17:19,289
- Well, I know, but when he
does come over, Max is so happy.
353
00:17:19,289 --> 00:17:21,708
I mean, it's like they have
their own little world together.
354
00:17:21,708 --> 00:17:22,918
- The Gipper and I have that, too!
355
00:17:22,918 --> 00:17:24,669
- Well, I know, but it's different.
356
00:17:25,629 --> 00:17:26,546
- How?
357
00:17:26,546 --> 00:17:27,339
- Well...
358
00:17:29,424 --> 00:17:31,635
He does the claw.
359
00:17:31,635 --> 00:17:32,552
- The what?
360
00:17:32,552 --> 00:17:33,428
- The claw.
361
00:17:34,304 --> 00:17:35,847
You know, it's like this...
362
00:17:37,474 --> 00:17:39,684
I don't...
363
00:17:39,684 --> 00:17:41,811
Run for your life. It's
the claw! The claw!
364
00:17:49,361 --> 00:17:51,029
Well, I can't really do it that good.
365
00:17:51,029 --> 00:17:52,030
Anyway, that's not the point.
366
00:17:52,030 --> 00:17:53,240
The point is...
367
00:17:54,074 --> 00:17:55,283
If they're 3,000 miles apart,
368
00:17:55,283 --> 00:17:56,952
they'll never gonna see each other.
369
00:17:56,952 --> 00:17:58,620
I mean, Fletcher is never
gonna come to Boston.
370
00:18:01,581 --> 00:18:02,415
Hello.
371
00:18:02,415 --> 00:18:03,250
- Audrey?
372
00:18:03,250 --> 00:18:06,002
- Fletcher! Fletcher! Where are
you? We are waiting for you.
373
00:18:06,002 --> 00:18:08,922
Max won't cut the cake until you get here.
374
00:18:08,922 --> 00:18:10,840
- Oh, man!
375
00:18:10,840 --> 00:18:12,592
Actually, something has come up.
376
00:18:13,635 --> 00:18:15,887
I've got this problem on a new case!
377
00:18:15,887 --> 00:18:16,721
- What happened?
378
00:18:16,721 --> 00:18:17,556
- Nothing!
379
00:18:17,556 --> 00:18:19,933
I stubbed my toe on the desk!
380
00:18:19,933 --> 00:18:23,645
Listen, I'm really sorry,
but I just can't make it.
381
00:18:23,645 --> 00:18:26,690
The boss is really riding me.
382
00:18:26,690 --> 00:18:30,026
- Oh, Fletcher, it's his birthday!
383
00:18:30,026 --> 00:18:33,822
- I know, I know. I'll make
it up to him, I promise.
384
00:18:33,822 --> 00:18:35,615
I'll pick him up from
school tomorrow, okay.
385
00:18:35,615 --> 00:18:36,783
- You're gonna pick him up?
386
00:18:36,783 --> 00:18:37,993
- Yes! Yes!
387
00:18:37,993 --> 00:18:39,035
- All right, well, hold on a minute.
388
00:18:39,035 --> 00:18:41,079
I'll get him, you can
say, "Happy birthday".
389
00:18:41,079 --> 00:18:44,249
- No! Gotta go! Good-bye.
390
00:18:45,625 --> 00:18:46,918
- Hello.
391
00:19:03,226 --> 00:19:05,812
- Okay, birthday boy. Make a wish.
392
00:19:08,898 --> 00:19:12,235
Come on, Max. It can be anything you want.
393
00:19:12,235 --> 00:19:14,487
Anything in the whole world.
394
00:19:29,169 --> 00:19:29,961
Max,
395
00:19:31,838 --> 00:19:35,342
your father is sorry, he had to work.
396
00:19:35,342 --> 00:19:37,177
- He said he was gonna
be here. He promised.
397
00:19:37,177 --> 00:19:40,263
- I know, I know, but he promises
398
00:19:40,263 --> 00:19:43,642
that he is gonna see you tomorrow, okay.
399
00:19:43,642 --> 00:19:46,144
He's gonna pick you up
from school. All right?
400
00:19:49,230 --> 00:19:49,981
So, come on.
401
00:19:51,816 --> 00:19:52,609
Make a wish.
402
00:20:05,538 --> 00:20:08,541
- I wish that for only one
day, dad couldn't tell a lie.
403
00:20:37,904 --> 00:20:39,698
- That was incredible.
404
00:20:41,825 --> 00:20:45,286
Was it good for you?
405
00:20:45,286 --> 00:20:46,371
- I've had better.
406
00:20:55,130 --> 00:20:56,798
"I've had better?"
407
00:21:00,176 --> 00:21:01,636
"I've had better?"
408
00:21:06,891 --> 00:21:10,812
"I've had better."
409
00:21:33,168 --> 00:21:34,252
Hi.
- Hi.
410
00:21:35,336 --> 00:21:36,546
- New in the building?
411
00:21:36,546 --> 00:21:38,131
- Yeah, I just moved in Monday.
412
00:21:38,131 --> 00:21:41,259
- Oh! You like it so far?
413
00:21:41,259 --> 00:21:42,927
- Everybody's been real nice.
414
00:21:42,927 --> 00:21:45,972
- Well, that's because you have big jugs.
415
00:21:45,972 --> 00:21:48,141
I mean, your boobs are huge.
416
00:21:48,141 --> 00:21:51,770
I mean, I want to squeeze them.
417
00:21:52,979 --> 00:21:53,855
Mama.
418
00:22:06,159 --> 00:22:07,577
- Any change, mister?
419
00:22:07,577 --> 00:22:08,787
- Absolutely.
420
00:22:08,787 --> 00:22:09,871
- Could you spare some?
421
00:22:09,871 --> 00:22:11,289
- Yes, I could.
422
00:22:11,289 --> 00:22:12,415
- Will you? How come?
423
00:22:13,792 --> 00:22:16,044
- Because I believe you
will buy booze with it!
424
00:22:16,044 --> 00:22:17,837
I just wanna get from my car to the office
425
00:22:17,837 --> 00:22:21,341
without being confronted by
the decay of Western society.
426
00:22:21,341 --> 00:22:24,052
Plus, I'm cheap!
427
00:22:25,261 --> 00:22:26,805
- Jerk-off!
428
00:22:57,585 --> 00:22:59,796
- You look like you're
having a rough morning.
429
00:22:59,796 --> 00:23:03,007
- Ding, ding, ding! What
do we have for her, Johnny?
430
00:23:04,634 --> 00:23:05,426
- Fletcher.
431
00:23:06,302 --> 00:23:07,554
- Dana.
432
00:23:07,554 --> 00:23:09,556
- All right Samantha,
how much will it take
433
00:23:09,556 --> 00:23:10,640
to put an end to all this?
434
00:23:10,640 --> 00:23:11,933
- 50% of your estate.
435
00:23:11,933 --> 00:23:14,853
- 50%°?
436
00:23:14,853 --> 00:23:18,314
With a prenup and proof of
adultery? What's your case?
437
00:23:18,314 --> 00:23:19,941
- Our case is simply this.
438
00:23:50,054 --> 00:23:51,764
- I can't stand this.
439
00:24:02,734 --> 00:24:04,903
- Very funny, Fletcher!
440
00:24:04,903 --> 00:24:07,572
You wanna play hardball? I'm game.
441
00:24:08,698 --> 00:24:11,409
- "You wanna play hardball? I'm game."
442
00:24:11,409 --> 00:24:14,412
- What are you doing?
What is wrong with you?
443
00:24:14,412 --> 00:24:18,708
- All rise for the Honorable
Judge, Marshall Stevens.
444
00:24:18,708 --> 00:24:20,960
- Honorable!
445
00:24:22,086 --> 00:24:23,212
- Good morning.
446
00:24:23,212 --> 00:24:27,508
Call case number BD09395.
447
00:24:27,508 --> 00:24:30,386
Samantha Cole versus Richard Cole.
448
00:24:30,386 --> 00:24:32,221
How are we doing this morning, Counsel?
449
00:24:32,221 --> 00:24:33,556
- Fine. Thank you.
450
00:24:33,556 --> 00:24:35,141
- And you, Mr. Reede?
451
00:24:35,141 --> 00:24:36,476
- I'm a little upset about a bad
452
00:24:36,476 --> 00:24:38,311
sexual episode I had last night.
453
00:24:42,357 --> 00:24:45,860
- Well, you're still young.
It'll happen more and more.
454
00:24:45,860 --> 00:24:49,405
In the meantime, what do you
say we get down to business?
455
00:24:50,448 --> 00:24:53,451
First, Mr. Reede, I
see where your client--
456
00:24:53,451 --> 00:24:55,620
- You Honor, I would like a continuance!
457
00:24:55,620 --> 00:24:57,830
- This case has already been delayed
458
00:24:57,830 --> 00:24:59,499
several times, Mr. Reede.
459
00:24:59,499 --> 00:25:00,667
- I realize that, Your Honor,
460
00:25:00,667 --> 00:25:03,628
but I would really, really,
really, like a continuance.
461
00:25:04,879 --> 00:25:07,298
- I'll have to hear a good cause, Counsel.
462
00:25:08,216 --> 00:25:09,133
What's the problem?
463
00:25:19,102 --> 00:25:22,105
-I can't lie!
464
00:25:22,105 --> 00:25:24,357
- Commendable, Mr. Reede, but I'm waiting
465
00:25:24,357 --> 00:25:27,068
to hear good cause, now,
do you have one or not?
466
00:25:27,068 --> 00:25:28,194
- Not.
467
00:25:28,194 --> 00:25:30,029
- Motion for continuance denied.
468
00:25:31,030 --> 00:25:33,282
Is there any chance of a
settlement in this case?
469
00:25:33,282 --> 00:25:34,534
- I don't think so, Your Honor,
470
00:25:34,534 --> 00:25:37,412
My client has offered
Mrs. Cole $2.4 million,
471
00:25:38,997 --> 00:25:39,998
but Mr. Reede has made it
472
00:25:39,998 --> 00:25:41,874
abundantly clear that he has no desire--
473
00:25:41,874 --> 00:25:44,585
- Settle! Settle! Settle! Settle! Settle!
474
00:25:44,585 --> 00:25:46,462
- I don't want to settle.
- You should settle.
475
00:25:46,462 --> 00:25:49,632
- Mr. Reede, you convinced me yesterday,
476
00:25:49,632 --> 00:25:52,719
I'm the victim here, I'm
starved for affection,
477
00:25:52,719 --> 00:25:54,971
I'm driven into the arms of another man.
478
00:25:54,971 --> 00:25:57,098
- Seven!
- Yeah, whatever.
479
00:25:57,098 --> 00:26:00,226
With the story you came up
with, I don't think we can lose.
480
00:26:00,226 --> 00:26:02,353
I want to proceed.
481
00:26:02,353 --> 00:26:04,564
- Mrs. Cole, you don't understand.
482
00:26:04,564 --> 00:26:07,233
- Mr. Reede. Do we have a settlement?
483
00:26:07,233 --> 00:26:08,026
- No!
484
00:26:13,364 --> 00:26:14,407
No, Your Honor.
485
00:26:14,407 --> 00:26:15,908
- There's no settlement.
486
00:26:17,118 --> 00:26:18,870
Trial to commence, 1:30 sharp.
487
00:26:38,389 --> 00:26:39,974
- It was me!
488
00:26:43,770 --> 00:26:46,272
- Hi, Mr. Reede! Like the new dress?
489
00:26:46,272 --> 00:26:48,274
- Whatever takes the focus off your head.
490
00:26:51,235 --> 00:26:52,070
- What's up, Fletcher?
491
00:26:52,070 --> 00:26:55,865
- Your cholesterol,
fatty! Dead man walking!
492
00:26:55,865 --> 00:26:56,783
- Hey Fletcher!
- Hey!
493
00:26:56,783 --> 00:26:58,284
You're not important enough to remember.
494
00:26:58,284 --> 00:26:59,577
- What's it gonna be, Mr. Reede?
495
00:26:59,577 --> 00:27:01,370
- A pockmark, eventually!
496
00:27:01,370 --> 00:27:03,748
Don't ask! For God's sakes, don't ask.
497
00:27:05,541 --> 00:27:07,585
All right. You can beat this.
498
00:27:07,585 --> 00:27:09,670
It's all a matter of willpower!
499
00:27:10,755 --> 00:27:12,215
A test.
500
00:27:12,215 --> 00:27:13,007
Something small.
501
00:27:19,889 --> 00:27:20,890
Red.
502
00:27:20,890 --> 00:27:22,141
Red.
503
00:27:22,141 --> 00:27:24,644
All right? Now, focus.
504
00:27:24,644 --> 00:27:29,524
The color of this pen is...
505
00:27:30,983 --> 00:27:35,780
The color of this pen is...
506
00:27:40,660 --> 00:27:45,581
The color of the
pen that I hold in my hand is
507
00:27:48,459 --> 00:27:49,335
royal blue!
508
00:27:54,382 --> 00:27:56,676
One lie, and I can't say it!
509
00:27:58,719 --> 00:28:00,221
I'll write it.
510
00:28:28,207 --> 00:28:31,836
Write it! Write it, or I'll break it off!
511
00:28:36,966 --> 00:28:38,426
Ah! No!
512
00:28:38,426 --> 00:28:39,218
Come on!
513
00:28:40,178 --> 00:28:41,095
Stop it.
514
00:28:51,314 --> 00:28:53,107
- Boss? What happened?
515
00:28:58,321 --> 00:29:01,824
- The pen is blue. The pen is blue.
516
00:29:01,824 --> 00:29:05,369
The goddamn pen is blue!
517
00:29:08,372 --> 00:29:10,708
- Mr. Reede, are you all right?
518
00:29:10,708 --> 00:29:12,126
- I gotta go home.
519
00:29:12,126 --> 00:29:13,794
- Home? Was the case settled?
520
00:29:13,794 --> 00:29:15,463
- No! I have to be in court at 1:30!
521
00:29:17,006 --> 00:29:18,549
- Then how are you going to go home?
522
00:29:18,549 --> 00:29:19,884
-I don't know. I don't know!
523
00:29:21,886 --> 00:29:23,346
- Okay.
524
00:29:23,346 --> 00:29:25,765
Mr. Reede, Rubin and Dunn called.
525
00:29:25,765 --> 00:29:28,684
They need to know where the
Darvis settlement offer stands.
526
00:29:28,684 --> 00:29:32,355
- I just proposed a settlement
to dick with them!
527
00:29:33,814 --> 00:29:36,234
- "Dick with them." Got it.
528
00:29:36,234 --> 00:29:39,153
And your mother called,
are you still on vacation?
529
00:29:39,153 --> 00:29:40,738
- No.
530
00:29:40,738 --> 00:29:41,572
- Then you're here?
531
00:29:41,572 --> 00:29:42,823
- Yes.
532
00:29:42,823 --> 00:29:44,825
- Thank you for clearing that up, sir.
533
00:29:44,825 --> 00:29:47,203
And your ex-wife called, she wants to know
534
00:29:47,203 --> 00:29:49,121
when you're coming to pick up your son.
535
00:29:49,121 --> 00:29:51,666
- Oh! I'm such a shit!
536
00:29:58,130 --> 00:29:58,965
- Hello.
537
00:29:58,965 --> 00:29:59,757
- Audrey?
538
00:29:59,757 --> 00:30:00,967
- Fletcher, hi, are you still
539
00:30:00,967 --> 00:30:02,343
picking Max up from school today?
540
00:30:02,343 --> 00:30:04,428
- Here's the thing. I really can't!
541
00:30:04,428 --> 00:30:06,639
I had a case I certain would settle,
542
00:30:06,639 --> 00:30:08,599
and it didn't, and I have to
go to court this afternoon.
543
00:30:08,599 --> 00:30:09,433
- Right.
544
00:30:09,433 --> 00:30:11,811
- It's true! I really wanna see Max today!
545
00:30:12,853 --> 00:30:14,563
How about that? I really do.
546
00:30:14,563 --> 00:30:16,941
- But things just keep coming
up at the last minute, right?
547
00:30:16,941 --> 00:30:18,317
- Yes, but this time it's different.
548
00:30:18,317 --> 00:30:19,986
- I see. And how is that?
549
00:30:19,986 --> 00:30:21,487
- Now I'm telling the truth.
550
00:30:21,487 --> 00:30:22,905
- And last night you weren't.
- No
551
00:30:22,905 --> 00:30:24,031
- Well, what were you doing?
552
00:30:24,031 --> 00:30:26,033
- Having sex!
553
00:30:27,159 --> 00:30:30,246
- Well, I hope that it was
with someone very special.
554
00:30:30,246 --> 00:30:31,664
- No! See, that's the thing.
555
00:30:31,664 --> 00:30:33,291
I don't even like her, but she's a partner
556
00:30:33,291 --> 00:30:35,626
and I thought I could help my
career by making her squeal.
557
00:30:39,130 --> 00:30:40,381
- Oh!
558
00:30:42,258 --> 00:30:44,135
- What's wrong with me?
559
00:30:45,177 --> 00:30:46,137
I'm getting what I deserve.
560
00:30:46,137 --> 00:30:48,306
I'm reaping what I sow. I'm--
561
00:30:58,941 --> 00:31:01,027
- Is dad still picking me up?
562
00:31:01,027 --> 00:31:02,403
- No, Max, he's not.
563
00:31:03,654 --> 00:31:05,156
I'm sorry.
564
00:31:05,156 --> 00:31:07,616
But I'm gonna pick you up,
okay. I'll work it out.
565
00:31:08,784 --> 00:31:11,078
- I guess my wish didn't come true.
566
00:31:11,078 --> 00:31:12,288
- What wish?
567
00:31:12,288 --> 00:31:15,958
- I wished that for just one
day dad couldn't tell a lie.
568
00:31:21,964 --> 00:31:22,757
- Max?
569
00:31:27,011 --> 00:31:30,306
I have something important I
wanna talk to you about, okay.
570
00:31:30,306 --> 00:31:31,432
- Okay.
- Okay.
571
00:31:40,441 --> 00:31:41,317
Hello.
572
00:31:41,317 --> 00:31:44,612
- Audrey, let me explain.
Something has happened to me.
573
00:31:44,612 --> 00:31:46,864
- Well, something else is about
to happen to you, Fletcher.
574
00:31:46,864 --> 00:31:48,532
Max and I are moving to Boston.
575
00:31:48,532 --> 00:31:49,367
- What?
576
00:31:49,367 --> 00:31:51,410
- Jerry has asked me to
marry him, and Max and I
577
00:31:51,410 --> 00:31:53,788
are going with him this
weekend to look at houses.
578
00:31:53,788 --> 00:31:55,456
- I thought it was semi-serious!
579
00:31:55,456 --> 00:31:56,749
- Yeah, well, it's just been given
580
00:31:56,749 --> 00:31:58,417
a violent shove into serious.
581
00:31:58,417 --> 00:32:00,961
- You can't move to
Boston, I'll never see Max!
582
00:32:00,961 --> 00:32:02,213
- Well, then you'll have pretty much
583
00:32:02,213 --> 00:32:04,423
the same relationship you
have with him now, won't you?
584
00:32:04,423 --> 00:32:05,257
- Where are you?
585
00:32:05,257 --> 00:32:06,300
- I'm going home.
586
00:32:06,300 --> 00:32:07,843
- When you get there, just stay there.
587
00:32:07,843 --> 00:32:09,512
I'm coming over. We have to talk.
588
00:32:09,512 --> 00:32:11,263
- Fletcher!
- I'll be right there.
589
00:32:15,101 --> 00:32:18,187
- La, la, la, la, la, la!
590
00:32:25,778 --> 00:32:27,071
- Fletcher!
- Holy hell!
591
00:32:32,910 --> 00:32:36,163
- You can run, but you can't hide.
592
00:32:41,293 --> 00:32:43,212
- What's your problem, schmuck?
593
00:32:43,212 --> 00:32:47,174
- I'm an inconsiderate prick!
594
00:33:09,738 --> 00:33:10,531
Shit!
595
00:33:16,203 --> 00:33:16,996
Shit!
596
00:33:25,588 --> 00:33:26,964
- You know why I pulled you over?
597
00:33:26,964 --> 00:33:30,426
- Depends on how long you
were following me.
598
00:33:30,426 --> 00:33:33,179
- Why don't we just take it from the top?
599
00:33:33,179 --> 00:33:34,013
- Here it goes.
600
00:33:34,013 --> 00:33:35,931
I sped, I followed too
closely, I ran a Stop sign,
601
00:33:35,931 --> 00:33:37,391
I almost hit a Chevy, I sped some more,
602
00:33:37,391 --> 00:33:38,767
I failed to yield at a crosswalk.
603
00:33:38,767 --> 00:33:40,102
I changed lanes at the intersection,
604
00:33:40,102 --> 00:33:41,437
I changed lanes without signaling
605
00:33:41,437 --> 00:33:43,355
while running a red light and speeding!
606
00:33:44,982 --> 00:33:45,983
- Is that all?
607
00:33:45,983 --> 00:33:46,775
- No.
608
00:33:49,737 --> 00:33:52,740
I have unpaid parking tickets.
609
00:33:55,493 --> 00:33:56,285
Be gentle.
610
00:34:00,247 --> 00:34:01,790
Audrey! Wait!
611
00:34:05,628 --> 00:34:07,630
Wait, Audrey. Oh!
612
00:34:07,630 --> 00:34:09,006
Hold on. Wait! Wait!
613
00:34:09,006 --> 00:34:13,344
- Wait? Wait? I just had an
insight into myself, I'm crazy.
614
00:34:13,344 --> 00:34:14,720
You call me up and say,
615
00:34:14,720 --> 00:34:17,014
"Wait, right there. I'll be right over.”
616
00:34:17,014 --> 00:34:19,600
And here's the crazy
part, I actually wait.
617
00:34:19,600 --> 00:34:20,893
- I can explain this though.
618
00:34:20,893 --> 00:34:23,729
- I have missed a department
meeting. I have...
619
00:34:23,729 --> 00:34:25,773
Did you come here in a cab?
- Yes!
620
00:34:25,773 --> 00:34:26,815
- Where's your car?
621
00:34:29,610 --> 00:34:32,446
- Thank you! I can't tell you
how much this means to me.
622
00:34:32,446 --> 00:34:36,575
-I can. $1,654.11.
623
00:34:36,575 --> 00:34:37,952
- How do you sleep at night?
624
00:34:41,622 --> 00:34:42,498
I'm taking this.
625
00:34:53,259 --> 00:34:54,927
You scratched my car!
626
00:34:56,178 --> 00:34:58,597
- Where?
627
00:34:58,597 --> 00:34:59,723
- Right there!
628
00:35:01,100 --> 00:35:01,976
- Oh, that.
629
00:35:03,686 --> 00:35:05,437
That was already there.
630
00:35:05,437 --> 00:35:07,147
- Why, you...
631
00:35:08,315 --> 00:35:09,733
You liar!
632
00:35:10,818 --> 00:35:12,611
You know what I'm gonna do about this?
633
00:35:12,611 --> 00:35:13,988
- What?
- Nothing!
634
00:35:13,988 --> 00:35:14,989
Because if I take you
to small-claims court,
635
00:35:14,989 --> 00:35:17,032
it will just drain 8 hours of my life,
636
00:35:17,032 --> 00:35:18,075
and you probably won't show up,
637
00:35:18,075 --> 00:35:19,493
and if I finally got the judgment,
638
00:35:19,493 --> 00:35:20,828
you'll just stiff me anyway,
639
00:35:20,828 --> 00:35:24,373
so what I'm gonna do, is piss
and moan like an impotent jerk
640
00:35:24,373 --> 00:35:27,960
and then bend over and
take it up the tailpipe!
641
00:35:28,919 --> 00:35:30,921
- You been here before, haven't you?
642
00:35:32,381 --> 00:35:34,592
- Well, I can't remember
when I've had more fun,
643
00:35:34,592 --> 00:35:36,927
but if you'll excuse me, I have a class.
644
00:35:36,927 --> 00:35:38,971
- Are you marrying this guy
because you're mad at me?
645
00:35:38,971 --> 00:35:41,098
- No, I divorced you
because I was mad at you.
646
00:35:41,098 --> 00:35:42,391
- Audrey, wait. I wanna talk about this!
647
00:35:42,391 --> 00:35:44,351
- Really, what do you wanna say?
648
00:35:44,351 --> 00:35:47,521
- Is this guy right for you?
I mean, he is so not me!
649
00:35:47,521 --> 00:35:49,273
- Yes! that's one of his best qualities.
650
00:35:49,273 --> 00:35:53,694
- Yeah, but he's kind of Magoo. I'm sorry.
651
00:35:53,694 --> 00:35:55,487
- You're wrong, I mean, sometimes,
652
00:35:55,487 --> 00:35:57,281
maybe yes, he is a little--
653
00:35:57,281 --> 00:35:58,115
- Magoo!
654
00:35:58,115 --> 00:36:01,327
- Yes, but since we've been
going out... Oh, my God.
655
00:36:01,327 --> 00:36:02,328
I'm not having this conversation with you.
656
00:36:02,328 --> 00:36:05,289
- Audrey, you can't go. This is not fair.
657
00:36:05,289 --> 00:36:09,209
- Fair? Oh, okay. Let's
define "fair," shall we?
658
00:36:09,209 --> 00:36:11,545
Last night a 5 year old boy was crushed,
659
00:36:11,545 --> 00:36:13,422
because his father lied to him
660
00:36:13,422 --> 00:36:16,300
about coming to his birthday party, fair?
661
00:36:16,300 --> 00:36:17,217
- Last night--
662
00:36:17,217 --> 00:36:19,011
- Was none of my business.
- Thank you.
663
00:36:19,011 --> 00:36:20,054
- None of my business.
664
00:36:20,054 --> 00:36:21,972
Two years ago, it was
my business, but see,
665
00:36:21,972 --> 00:36:23,724
I don't have to care about that anymore.
666
00:36:23,724 --> 00:36:25,601
I don't care, that's the magic of divorce,
667
00:36:25,601 --> 00:36:27,269
but it matters to Max!
668
00:36:27,269 --> 00:36:28,979
Everything you do, matters to Max,
669
00:36:28,979 --> 00:36:30,773
and everything you don't do.
670
00:36:30,773 --> 00:36:33,108
- All right, now let
me tell you something.
671
00:36:33,108 --> 00:36:34,652
I'm a bad father!
672
00:36:37,946 --> 00:36:39,406
I mean...
673
00:36:45,037 --> 00:36:46,664
I'm a bad father.
674
00:36:49,208 --> 00:36:53,712
- You're not a bad
father, when you show up.
675
00:36:53,712 --> 00:36:54,838
- What if I come over right after
676
00:36:54,838 --> 00:36:56,256
court light-out and play ball with Max?
677
00:36:56,256 --> 00:36:57,883
Then you and I can sit down and talk
678
00:36:57,883 --> 00:36:59,843
before you make any rash decisions!
679
00:36:59,843 --> 00:37:01,720
- No, we are leaving tonight.
680
00:37:01,720 --> 00:37:04,932
- Please Audrey, give me one more chance.
681
00:37:04,932 --> 00:37:07,601
I'm throwing myself on
the mercy of the court.
682
00:37:07,601 --> 00:37:11,772
I lost you, but please,
don't make me lose Max, too.
683
00:37:15,442 --> 00:37:18,946
Give me a chance to be the
father I started out to be.
684
00:37:23,534 --> 00:37:25,661
- You're really coming?
685
00:37:26,578 --> 00:37:27,996
- This is ironclad.
686
00:37:27,996 --> 00:37:31,291
This is the mother of
all promises. What time?
687
00:37:31,291 --> 00:37:33,377
- Okay, 6:00.
688
00:37:33,377 --> 00:37:35,713
- 10 to 6:00.
- All right.
689
00:37:35,713 --> 00:37:37,172
All right, all right, all right,
690
00:37:37,172 --> 00:37:40,926
but if I tell Max that you're
coming, and you don't show up,
691
00:37:40,926 --> 00:37:43,220
and I have to see that look on his face,
692
00:37:43,220 --> 00:37:44,430
that heartbreaking look,
693
00:37:46,181 --> 00:37:47,725
we're going to Boston.
694
00:37:48,600 --> 00:37:51,186
- If I don't show up,
I'll pack you myself.
695
00:37:51,186 --> 00:37:54,815
I will lovingly wrap your
knickknacks with bubble paper.
696
00:37:54,815 --> 00:37:55,691
- I hope so.
697
00:37:58,277 --> 00:38:00,988
Do you know what your son
was doing at 8:15 last night?
698
00:38:02,239 --> 00:38:05,451
He was making a birthday
wish, that for just one day
699
00:38:05,451 --> 00:38:07,745
his father couldn't tell a lie.
700
00:38:13,542 --> 00:38:16,795
- Oh, my God! That's it!
701
00:38:16,795 --> 00:38:19,298
- "I do not like them, Sam I Am."
702
00:38:19,298 --> 00:38:22,509
"I do not like green eggs and ham.”
703
00:38:22,509 --> 00:38:24,803
"Would you like them here or there?"
704
00:38:24,803 --> 00:38:25,971
"I would not like them--"
705
00:38:25,971 --> 00:38:26,764
- Excuse me.
706
00:38:28,056 --> 00:38:32,060
Hi. I'm Max's bad father. I'm his father.
707
00:38:32,060 --> 00:38:33,437
- Dad!
708
00:38:33,437 --> 00:38:35,606
- Could I borrow him for just one second?
709
00:38:37,149 --> 00:38:38,984
Monster Max!
710
00:38:38,984 --> 00:38:41,236
- Dadzilla! You came to play catch?
711
00:38:41,236 --> 00:38:42,571
- I'd like to, but I can't right now.
712
00:38:42,571 --> 00:38:44,281
Max, I gotta talk to you.
713
00:38:44,281 --> 00:38:45,657
Your mommy told me about that wish
714
00:38:45,657 --> 00:38:48,202
you made last night, it came true, Max.
715
00:38:48,202 --> 00:38:50,788
- Really, you mean you
have to tell the truth?
716
00:38:50,788 --> 00:38:52,247
- Yes.
- No matter what?
717
00:38:52,247 --> 00:38:53,123
- No matter what!
718
00:38:53,123 --> 00:38:54,792
- Is wrestling real?
719
00:38:54,792 --> 00:38:57,002
- In the Olympics, yes. On channel 23, no.
720
00:38:57,002 --> 00:38:59,755
- Will sitting too close to
the TV set make me go blind?
721
00:38:59,755 --> 00:39:01,215
- Not in a million years.
722
00:39:01,215 --> 00:39:04,218
- If I keep making this face,
will it get stuck that way?
723
00:39:05,177 --> 00:39:07,513
- In fact, some people make
a good living that way.
724
00:39:10,557 --> 00:39:13,393
Now listen, Max, you
gotta do something for me.
725
00:39:13,393 --> 00:39:15,604
I need you to take back that wish.
726
00:39:15,604 --> 00:39:17,773
- So you can lie?
727
00:39:17,773 --> 00:39:18,857
- Yes.
728
00:39:18,857 --> 00:39:21,193
- But not to you, you see, Max,
729
00:39:22,361 --> 00:39:27,324
sometimes grownups need to lie.
730
00:39:27,741 --> 00:39:29,743
It's hard to explain, but if...
731
00:39:31,495 --> 00:39:32,913
Look, here's a good example,
732
00:39:32,913 --> 00:39:34,414
when your mommy was pregnant with you,
733
00:39:34,414 --> 00:39:35,916
she gained a good 40 pounds,
734
00:39:35,916 --> 00:39:38,585
there was nothing she wouldn't
eat, and daddy was scared,
735
00:39:38,585 --> 00:39:39,962
but when she'd ask me, "How do I look?"
736
00:39:39,962 --> 00:39:42,005
I'd say, "Honey, you look great."
737
00:39:42,005 --> 00:39:44,299
"You're beautiful. You're glowing."
738
00:39:44,299 --> 00:39:46,301
If I had told mommy she looked like a cow,
739
00:39:46,301 --> 00:39:48,428
it would have hurt her
feelings, you understand.
740
00:39:48,428 --> 00:39:50,889
- My teacher tells me real
beauty is on the inside.
741
00:39:50,889 --> 00:39:52,850
- That's just something ugly people say.
742
00:39:54,434 --> 00:39:56,645
Max, no one can survive in the adult world
743
00:39:56,645 --> 00:39:58,313
if they have to stick to the truth.
744
00:39:58,313 --> 00:40:01,066
I could lose my case, I
could lose my promotion,
745
00:40:01,066 --> 00:40:02,651
I could even lose my job.
746
00:40:02,651 --> 00:40:04,278
Now, I need your help, Max. Okay?
747
00:40:05,737 --> 00:40:07,072
- Okay.
748
00:40:07,072 --> 00:40:11,201
- Okays, now do whatever
you did last night,
749
00:40:11,201 --> 00:40:12,411
only this time,
750
00:40:13,704 --> 00:40:15,038
make it an unwish.
751
00:40:25,007 --> 00:40:25,966
- I did it.
752
00:40:25,966 --> 00:40:29,595
- Excellent! Now, I
just need a little test.
753
00:40:49,323 --> 00:40:50,616
- Did it work?
754
00:40:50,616 --> 00:40:52,576
- Not like I'd hoped. Did you unwish it?
755
00:40:53,827 --> 00:40:56,496
- Only--
- What? Only what?
756
00:40:56,496 --> 00:40:59,833
- Yesterday, when I wished
it, I really meant it,
757
00:40:59,833 --> 00:41:01,793
this time when I unwished it,
758
00:41:01,793 --> 00:41:04,171
I only did it 'cause you told me to.
759
00:41:04,171 --> 00:41:06,673
- All right, then, do it again,
760
00:41:06,673 --> 00:41:08,550
and this time, mean it.
761
00:41:08,550 --> 00:41:09,801
- But I can't!
762
00:41:09,801 --> 00:41:11,011
- Why not?
763
00:41:11,011 --> 00:41:13,347
- 'Cause I don't want you to lie.
764
00:41:13,347 --> 00:41:18,060
- I explained this, I have
to lie, everybody lies.
765
00:41:18,060 --> 00:41:21,688
Mommy lies, even the wonderful Jerry lies.
766
00:41:21,688 --> 00:41:24,107
- But you're the only one
that makes me feel bad.
767
00:41:26,360 --> 00:41:29,738
- Max, recess is over. Come on in!
768
00:41:34,743 --> 00:41:36,703
- Mom says we're moving to Boston.
769
00:41:36,703 --> 00:41:39,331
- That isn't for sure yet.
770
00:41:40,207 --> 00:41:43,001
She promised we'd talk about
it when I come over tonight.
771
00:41:44,211 --> 00:41:47,547
I am coming! You believe
me, don't you, Max?
772
00:41:49,549 --> 00:41:51,009
I'll see you later, buddy.
773
00:42:01,603 --> 00:42:02,771
- Yo Fletcher. How's it hanging?
774
00:42:02,771 --> 00:42:04,898
- Short, shriveled and always to the left.
775
00:42:09,695 --> 00:42:13,281
- Boss, it's Skull, he
knocked over another ATM,
776
00:42:13,281 --> 00:42:17,244
this time at knife-point,
he needs your legal advice.
777
00:42:21,081 --> 00:42:24,668
- Stop breaking the law, asshole!
778
00:42:33,093 --> 00:42:35,220
- Boss, are you all right?
779
00:42:35,220 --> 00:42:36,847
- My son hates me.
780
00:42:38,598 --> 00:42:43,020
- Max loves you. I've seen
you together, you're his hero.
781
00:42:43,937 --> 00:42:44,730
- Oh, yeah?
782
00:42:46,606 --> 00:42:49,276
Last night at his birthday
party, he made a wish,
783
00:42:50,193 --> 00:42:54,072
that I wouldn't be able
to lie for one whole day.
784
00:42:54,072 --> 00:42:54,990
- Kids.
785
00:42:54,990 --> 00:42:56,825
- It came true.
786
00:42:56,825 --> 00:42:58,869
- What?
- Max's wish!
787
00:42:59,911 --> 00:43:00,954
It came true.
788
00:43:08,045 --> 00:43:11,173
- Boss, maybe you
should just take a few days off.
789
00:43:11,173 --> 00:43:13,383
- Greta, didn't
it seem weird to you
790
00:43:13,383 --> 00:43:15,719
that I kept telling the truth all morning?
791
00:43:15,719 --> 00:43:19,639
- Well, yeah, but...
792
00:43:19,639 --> 00:43:23,185
What are you saying? That
you are incapable of lying?
793
00:43:23,185 --> 00:43:26,605
- That's right! I am incapable of lying!
794
00:43:26,605 --> 00:43:27,814
- Just for today?
795
00:43:28,732 --> 00:43:30,901
- Apparently,
till 8:15 tonight.
796
00:43:30,901 --> 00:43:33,028
It's just one of those 24-hour curses.
797
00:43:33,028 --> 00:43:35,072
- Yeah, those are going around.
798
00:43:35,072 --> 00:43:36,239
- You don't believe me, do you?
799
00:43:36,239 --> 00:43:37,449
- Of course not.
800
00:43:39,076 --> 00:43:41,119
- How ironic!
801
00:43:41,119 --> 00:43:45,207
Okay, ask me something you think
I would normally lie about.
802
00:43:45,207 --> 00:43:46,625
- All right.
803
00:43:46,625 --> 00:43:48,919
Remember a couple of months
ago, when I wanted a raise?
804
00:43:48,919 --> 00:43:50,170
- Just forget it. I don't wanna do this.
805
00:43:50,170 --> 00:43:51,880
- And the company wouldn't give me one,
806
00:43:51,880 --> 00:43:54,132
and I asked if you would give it to me
807
00:43:54,132 --> 00:43:56,426
out of your own pocket, and you said
808
00:43:56,426 --> 00:43:57,719
that the company would not allow it,
809
00:43:57,719 --> 00:44:00,055
because it would create jealousy
810
00:44:00,055 --> 00:44:02,099
among the other secretaries.
811
00:44:02,099 --> 00:44:04,893
Now, was that true, or did you just
812
00:44:04,893 --> 00:44:06,436
not wanna pony up the dough?
813
00:44:09,564 --> 00:44:11,691
- Greta, please!
814
00:44:11,691 --> 00:44:13,568
Hello, Judge Stevens, hi!
815
00:44:13,568 --> 00:44:14,861
Fletcher Reede, I'm scheduled to be
816
00:44:14,861 --> 00:44:16,196
in your court in half an hour.
817
00:44:16,196 --> 00:44:19,574
Judge Stevens, I badly,
badly, need a continuance.
818
00:44:19,574 --> 00:44:22,160
Ill. Am I ill?
819
00:44:22,160 --> 00:44:24,287
That is the perfect
question for you to ask.
820
00:44:24,287 --> 00:44:25,914
Greta please lie to him for me!
821
00:44:25,914 --> 00:44:27,040
- I remember when you bought me
822
00:44:27,040 --> 00:44:31,002
this antique frame from
Tiffany's, Tiffany's?
823
00:44:31,002 --> 00:44:34,464
- Garage sale. $6.50 marked down from $10.
824
00:44:36,842 --> 00:44:38,135
I'll give you the raise!
825
00:44:39,970 --> 00:44:41,847
- Here's your raise.
826
00:44:43,431 --> 00:44:44,891
- Hi, Judge Stevens!
827
00:44:44,891 --> 00:44:46,893
Yes, I know I haven't
given you an answer yet,
828
00:44:46,893 --> 00:44:49,938
but, illness could mean so many things.
829
00:44:49,938 --> 00:44:53,108
Can you hold? Hello? Mom!
830
00:44:53,108 --> 00:44:53,900
Hi!
831
00:44:54,985 --> 00:44:57,028
I wasn't really on vacation,
832
00:44:57,028 --> 00:44:59,489
‘cause I didn't wanna talk to you!
833
00:44:59,489 --> 00:45:00,907
Because you insist on talking to me
834
00:45:00,907 --> 00:45:03,451
about Dad's bowel movements,
size, color, frequency.
835
00:45:03,451 --> 00:45:05,078
I'll call you later! Hello?
836
00:45:06,580 --> 00:45:11,668
Oh! Damn it! I cut him
off. I cut off the judge!
837
00:45:16,840 --> 00:45:19,176
Greta! Don't leave!
838
00:45:19,176 --> 00:45:21,261
I'm on my knees in a $900 suit!
839
00:45:23,930 --> 00:45:27,100
- Mr. Reede, several years
ago, a friend of mine
840
00:45:27,100 --> 00:45:29,019
had a burglar on her roof, a burglar.
841
00:45:29,019 --> 00:45:30,770
He fell through the kitchen skylight,
842
00:45:30,770 --> 00:45:32,105
landed on a cutting board,
843
00:45:32,105 --> 00:45:34,065
on a butcher's knife, cutting his leg.
844
00:45:34,065 --> 00:45:37,360
The burglar sued my
friend. He sued my friend!
845
00:45:37,360 --> 00:45:39,863
And because of guys like you, he won!
846
00:45:39,863 --> 00:45:44,284
My friend had to pay the
burglar $6,000. Is that justice?
847
00:45:44,284 --> 00:45:45,076
- No.
848
00:45:46,328 --> 00:45:47,537
I'd have got him $10,000.
849
00:45:49,122 --> 00:45:50,290
- Good-bye, Mr. Reede.
850
00:45:50,290 --> 00:45:52,667
- No! No! No! Wait! I didn't
understand the question!
851
00:45:52,667 --> 00:45:53,919
Ask me again! Ask me again!
852
00:45:53,919 --> 00:45:55,378
- Have a nice day in court.
853
00:45:55,378 --> 00:45:56,171
- Greta!
854
00:45:58,048 --> 00:45:59,549
- Hi.
- God in heaven!
855
00:46:00,884 --> 00:46:03,428
- It's nice to see you too
Fletcher. Are you busy?
856
00:46:03,428 --> 00:46:04,429
- Extremely.
857
00:46:04,429 --> 00:46:06,556
- Good. Would you follow me, please?
858
00:46:11,102 --> 00:46:12,896
Did you know that the
partnership committee
859
00:46:12,896 --> 00:46:15,398
is being headed up be Mr. Allan himself?
860
00:46:15,398 --> 00:46:18,193
You used to work directly
for Mr. Allan, didn't you?
861
00:46:18,193 --> 00:46:19,027
- Yeah!
862
00:46:19,027 --> 00:46:20,737
- Tell me,
863
00:46:20,737 --> 00:46:21,863
what do you think of him?
864
00:46:23,490 --> 00:46:25,909
- He's a pedantic, pontificating,
pretentious bastard!
865
00:46:25,909 --> 00:46:27,869
A belligerent old fart,
a worthless steaming
866
00:46:27,869 --> 00:46:31,122
pile of cow dung, figuratively speaking.
867
00:46:31,122 --> 00:46:34,167
- Really? How delightful. This way.
868
00:46:36,211 --> 00:46:38,797
Pardon me for interrupting your meeting.
869
00:46:38,797 --> 00:46:40,882
Mr. Allan, you remember Fletcher Reede?
870
00:46:41,925 --> 00:46:45,011
- Oh, yes, yes. Nice to
see you again, Fletcher.
871
00:46:45,011 --> 00:46:48,014
By the way, I'll be observing
you in court this afternoon.
872
00:46:48,014 --> 00:46:50,517
I've been hearing some good
things about you.
873
00:46:50,517 --> 00:46:53,728
- Well, Fletcher has been telling me
874
00:46:53,728 --> 00:46:56,064
how much he thinks of you.
875
00:46:56,064 --> 00:46:58,191
Oh, why don't you tell Mr. Allan.
876
00:46:58,191 --> 00:47:00,735
Well, what do you think of him?
877
00:47:07,826 --> 00:47:11,246
- He's a pedantic, pontificating,
pretentious bastard.
878
00:47:11,246 --> 00:47:13,290
A belligerent old fart, a worthless
879
00:47:13,290 --> 00:47:17,085
steaming pile of cow dung.
880
00:47:18,003 --> 00:47:20,463
Figuratively speaking.
881
00:47:40,650 --> 00:47:43,445
- That's the funniest damn
thing I've ever heard!
882
00:47:43,445 --> 00:47:47,824
You're a real card, Reede!
I love a good roast!
883
00:47:49,409 --> 00:47:50,285
Do Simmons!
884
00:47:51,619 --> 00:47:53,038
- Simmons is old!
885
00:47:55,248 --> 00:47:56,833
He should've been out
of the game years ago,
886
00:47:56,833 --> 00:47:58,835
but he can't stay home
'cause he hates his wife.
887
00:48:01,629 --> 00:48:03,173
You've met her at the Christmas parties,
888
00:48:03,173 --> 00:48:05,842
she's the one that gets
plastered and calls him a retard.
889
00:48:06,718 --> 00:48:11,014
And you, Tom, you're the biggest
brown nose I've ever seen!
890
00:48:11,014 --> 00:48:13,141
You've got your head so
far up Mr. Allan's ass,
891
00:48:13,141 --> 00:48:15,685
I can't tell where you end and he begins!
892
00:48:15,685 --> 00:48:18,104
- Priceless!
893
00:48:20,440 --> 00:48:22,984
- You have bad breath
caused by gingivitis.
894
00:48:22,984 --> 00:48:24,652
You couldn't get a porn star off.
895
00:48:24,652 --> 00:48:25,987
Your hairpiece looks like something
896
00:48:25,987 --> 00:48:27,489
that killed crossing the highway.
897
00:48:27,489 --> 00:48:28,740
I don't know whether to comb it
898
00:48:28,740 --> 00:48:31,618
or scrape it off with a
shovel and bury it in lime!
899
00:48:33,078 --> 00:48:34,287
Loser!
900
00:48:34,287 --> 00:48:35,288
Idiot!
901
00:48:35,288 --> 00:48:36,206
Wimp!
902
00:48:36,206 --> 00:48:37,415
Degenerate!
903
00:48:37,415 --> 00:48:39,042
Slut!
904
00:48:41,211 --> 00:48:43,880
- I like your style, Reede!
905
00:48:43,880 --> 00:48:45,965
That's just what this
stuffy company needs!
906
00:48:45,965 --> 00:48:47,717
A little irreverence!
907
00:48:47,717 --> 00:48:50,095
- Good! I'll see you later, dickhead!
908
00:48:51,888 --> 00:48:53,640
- Dickhead! Priceless!
909
00:49:10,615 --> 00:49:13,743
- Oh! Keep your eye on that boy.
910
00:49:13,743 --> 00:49:15,120
Dickhead!
911
00:49:36,141 --> 00:49:39,394
- Third District
Court is now in session.
912
00:49:39,394 --> 00:49:42,981
The Honorable Judge
Marshall Stevens presiding.
913
00:49:44,816 --> 00:49:49,195
- Afternoon, Counselors.
Are we ready to begin?
914
00:49:49,195 --> 00:49:50,029
- No, sir!
915
00:49:50,029 --> 00:49:51,406
We are not ready to begin,
916
00:49:51,406 --> 00:49:53,908
because my client has not arrived!
917
00:49:53,908 --> 00:49:55,910
- Hurry up! Move it! Move it!
918
00:49:58,830 --> 00:49:59,956
- Mr. Reede!
919
00:49:59,956 --> 00:50:01,207
- Sorry, Your Honor.
920
00:50:01,207 --> 00:50:03,960
- Go, go, go. and Lupe,
you keep those kids quiet.
921
00:50:03,960 --> 00:50:06,171
I'm not even close to kidding.
922
00:50:06,171 --> 00:50:09,549
Sorry. Billy threw up in the car.
923
00:50:09,549 --> 00:50:12,218
- You brought your kids to your divorce?
924
00:50:12,218 --> 00:50:13,803
- Sympathy.
- Well, it's working.
925
00:50:13,803 --> 00:50:16,431
I feel sorry for them already.
926
00:50:16,431 --> 00:50:19,392
- Miss Appleton, you may begin.
927
00:50:19,392 --> 00:50:21,853
From March 6 through June 12,
928
00:50:21,853 --> 00:50:25,607
I surveilled Mrs. Cole at
the behest of Mr. Cole.
929
00:50:25,607 --> 00:50:27,650
During that period, I noted that Mr. Cole
930
00:50:27,650 --> 00:50:31,529
left each day between 7:40 and 7:50.
931
00:50:31,529 --> 00:50:34,616
Thereafter Mrs. Cole would frequently have
932
00:50:34,616 --> 00:50:39,329
a male visitor arrive and
stay from one to four hours.
933
00:50:39,329 --> 00:50:44,125
I was able to take several
photographs of the male visitor.
934
00:50:44,125 --> 00:50:45,168
- I see.
935
00:50:46,878 --> 00:50:50,131
Do you know what Mrs.
Cole and her male visitor
936
00:50:50,131 --> 00:50:54,177
did during these frequent visits?
937
00:50:54,177 --> 00:50:56,971
- Well, they were good about
keeping the shades drawn,
938
00:50:56,971 --> 00:51:01,267
but I was able to make a
recording of one such session.
939
00:51:03,102 --> 00:51:05,313
- Your Honor, as you are aware,
940
00:51:05,313 --> 00:51:07,357
under the terms of the
prenuptial agreement,
941
00:51:07,357 --> 00:51:11,361
if Mrs. Cole commits adultery,
she is entitled to nothing.
942
00:51:12,237 --> 00:51:14,197
With your permission, we'd like to play
943
00:51:14,197 --> 00:51:15,865
the following tape recording.
944
00:51:18,159 --> 00:51:19,577
- Oh yeah.
945
00:51:19,577 --> 00:51:22,914
- Its that good to
you baby. Here comes Big Daddy!
946
00:51:22,914 --> 00:51:24,374
- Oh, God!
947
00:51:24,374 --> 00:51:26,751
Oh! Do it to me! Do it to me!
948
00:51:27,877 --> 00:51:32,840
Harder! Harder!
949
00:51:35,969 --> 00:51:37,095
- Oh! Come on!
950
00:51:38,137 --> 00:51:40,974
Your Honor, how can it be
proved that the male voice
951
00:51:40,974 --> 00:51:43,351
on that tape is not Mr. Cole himself?
952
00:51:43,351 --> 00:51:47,730
- You are such a better lover
than my husband! Oh, my God!
953
00:51:47,730 --> 00:51:49,607
- Your Honor, I object!
954
00:51:49,607 --> 00:51:51,276
- And why is that, Mr. Reede?
955
00:51:51,276 --> 00:51:53,278
- Because it's devastating to my case!
956
00:51:53,278 --> 00:51:54,279
- Overruled.
957
00:51:54,279 --> 00:51:55,405
- Good call!
958
00:51:56,656 --> 00:51:58,992
- I gotta go. I still
haven't cleaned your pool.
959
00:51:58,992 --> 00:52:00,076
- Your witness.
960
00:52:00,076 --> 00:52:03,288
- All right.
961
00:52:03,288 --> 00:52:05,790
- Well, Mr. Reede, you may proceed.
962
00:52:11,546 --> 00:52:12,338
- How?
963
00:52:37,864 --> 00:52:39,157
Your Honor, would the court be willing
964
00:52:39,157 --> 00:52:41,200
to grant me a short bathroom break?
965
00:52:41,200 --> 00:52:42,702
- Can't it wait?
966
00:52:42,702 --> 00:52:43,494
- Yes, it can.
967
00:52:44,621 --> 00:52:45,538
But I've heard that if you hold it,
968
00:52:45,538 --> 00:52:47,707
you can damage the prostate
gland, making it very difficult
969
00:52:47,707 --> 00:52:50,710
to get an erection or even become aroused!
970
00:52:50,710 --> 00:52:52,045
- Is that true?
971
00:52:52,045 --> 00:52:52,879
- It has to be.
972
00:52:54,589 --> 00:52:56,799
- In that case, I better
take a little break myself.
973
00:52:56,799 --> 00:52:59,302
But you get back here immediately
so we can finish this.
974
00:53:15,985 --> 00:53:18,946
- How am I going to get out of this?
975
00:53:22,367 --> 00:53:23,660
Think.
976
00:53:23,660 --> 00:53:24,452
Think.
977
00:53:25,370 --> 00:53:26,162
Think!
978
00:54:25,346 --> 00:54:27,181
- What the hell are you doing?
979
00:54:28,641 --> 00:54:31,352
- I'm kicking my ass!
980
00:54:31,352 --> 00:54:32,145
Do you mind?
981
00:54:58,087 --> 00:55:00,339
- I found him like this in
the bathroom, Your Honor.
982
00:55:00,339 --> 00:55:02,508
Somebody beat the hell out of him.
983
00:55:02,508 --> 00:55:03,468
- Who did this?
984
00:55:03,468 --> 00:55:05,887
- A madman, Your Honor!
985
00:55:05,887 --> 00:55:08,890
A desperate fool at the
end of his pitiful rope!
986
00:55:08,890 --> 00:55:10,391
- What did he look like?
987
00:55:10,391 --> 00:55:14,645
- About 6'2", 180 pounds,
big teeth, kind of gangly.
988
00:55:14,645 --> 00:55:16,731
- Bailiff, have the deputy
search the building.
989
00:55:16,731 --> 00:55:17,565
- Yes, sir.
990
00:55:19,442 --> 00:55:20,777
- Order!
991
00:55:20,777 --> 00:55:21,861
Order!
992
00:55:26,824 --> 00:55:27,950
Under the circumstances,
993
00:55:27,950 --> 00:55:30,286
I have no choice but to recess this case
994
00:55:30,286 --> 00:55:33,164
until 9:00 a.m. tomorrow morning.
995
00:55:33,164 --> 00:55:36,125
Unless, of course, you
feel you can still proceed.
996
00:55:40,254 --> 00:55:41,714
Can you?
997
00:55:47,011 --> 00:55:47,804
- Yes,
998
00:55:49,138 --> 00:55:49,931
I can.
999
00:55:51,641 --> 00:55:53,434
- I admire your courage, Mr. Reede.
1000
00:55:54,644 --> 00:55:57,688
We'll take a short recess so
that you can compose yourself,
1001
00:55:57,688 --> 00:55:59,023
and then we'll get started.
1002
00:56:09,116 --> 00:56:10,618
- Here you go.
1003
00:56:23,631 --> 00:56:24,799
- Hello?
1004
00:56:24,799 --> 00:56:25,675
- Dad?
1005
00:56:25,675 --> 00:56:27,343
- Max?
1006
00:56:27,343 --> 00:56:28,302
How's it going?
1007
00:56:28,302 --> 00:56:31,222
- Great, you know Paul and
Emanuel from across the street?
1008
00:56:31,222 --> 00:56:32,056
- Yeah.
1009
00:56:32,056 --> 00:56:35,017
- Well, they never wanna
play baseball with me,
1010
00:56:35,017 --> 00:56:37,270
but I told them I'm playing
tonight with my dad.
1011
00:56:37,270 --> 00:56:39,730
So now they wanna play
with us. Is that okay?
1012
00:56:39,730 --> 00:56:42,650
- Sure. The more the merrier.
1013
00:56:42,650 --> 00:56:45,236
- Coolest! Do you wanna be Jose Canseco?
1014
00:56:45,236 --> 00:56:46,863
- Oh, yeah.
1015
00:56:46,863 --> 00:56:49,615
Who else is gonna hit
that famous Nomo slider?
1016
00:56:49,615 --> 00:56:50,408
- Mr. Reede.
1017
00:56:51,826 --> 00:56:53,578
- I gotta go now, Max.
1018
00:56:53,578 --> 00:56:56,372
I'll see you in a couple of
hours, okay, all right, bye.
1019
00:56:56,372 --> 00:56:57,164
- Bye, dad.
1020
00:56:59,250 --> 00:57:02,628
He's really coming! He's really
coming! I'm gonna go change.
1021
00:57:02,628 --> 00:57:03,713
- Okay, go ahead!
1022
00:57:03,713 --> 00:57:04,505
- Yeah!
1023
00:57:09,552 --> 00:57:10,511
- Mr. Reede!
1024
00:57:11,637 --> 00:57:12,847
- "Mr. Reede! Mr. Reede!"
1025
00:57:16,392 --> 00:57:18,102
- This is my lawyer,
he's a little unorthodox,
1026
00:57:18,102 --> 00:57:19,979
you'll get used to him.
1027
00:57:21,397 --> 00:57:24,275
Mr. Reede, you remember Kenneth
Falk, the man from the tape.
1028
00:57:24,275 --> 00:57:25,151
- How could I forget?
1029
00:57:25,151 --> 00:57:27,028
- Hey, how you doing?
1030
00:57:27,028 --> 00:57:30,114
- I've slipped into the seventh
circle of hell, thank you.
1031
00:57:30,114 --> 00:57:33,367
- Shouldn't we be going over
our testimony right now?
1032
00:57:33,367 --> 00:57:36,329
- Basically, the plan is, I
walk you through the tape.
1033
00:57:36,329 --> 00:57:38,456
Step by step, I ask you questions--
1034
00:57:38,456 --> 00:57:41,417
- Right, and we give the
explanation you came up with.
1035
00:57:41,417 --> 00:57:42,293
- Exactly.
1036
00:57:42,293 --> 00:57:44,629
- So all we are gonna do
is lie. That sounds simple.
1037
00:57:44,629 --> 00:57:45,421
- Doesn't it!
1038
00:57:46,881 --> 00:57:49,133
Then I'll finish up with a
dramatic series of questions.
1039
00:57:49,133 --> 00:57:53,596
Something like, Mr. Falk, isn't it true
1040
00:57:53,596 --> 00:57:57,975
that you and Mrs. Cole have
never made...
1041
00:58:06,525 --> 00:58:07,944
I can'tdo it.
1042
00:58:07,944 --> 00:58:12,740
I can't finish the question
if I know the answer is a lie.
1043
00:58:27,672 --> 00:58:29,382
- You may proceed, Mr. Reede.
1044
00:58:43,312 --> 00:58:44,605
- Respondent calls,
1045
00:58:47,316 --> 00:58:48,484
Kenneth Falk.
1046
00:59:06,585 --> 00:59:08,379
- Raise your right hand.
1047
00:59:08,379 --> 00:59:09,922
Do you swear to tell the
truth, the whole truth,
1048
00:59:09,922 --> 00:59:11,674
and nothing but the
truth, so help you God?
1049
00:59:11,674 --> 00:59:12,466
-I do!
1050
00:59:13,551 --> 00:59:14,385
I mean...
1051
00:59:18,222 --> 00:59:19,015
- I do.
1052
00:59:26,480 --> 00:59:27,356
- Mr. Falk.
1053
00:59:32,945 --> 00:59:34,739
Do you know my client, Samantha Cole?
1054
00:59:35,865 --> 00:59:36,657
- Yes.
1055
00:59:40,369 --> 00:59:42,204
Isn't it true that your relationship
1056
00:59:42,204 --> 00:59:44,957
with my client is entirely platonic?
1057
00:59:44,957 --> 00:59:47,418
I object, Your Honor!
1058
00:59:47,418 --> 00:59:48,419
- To yourself?
1059
00:59:50,129 --> 00:59:55,092
- Yeah, but I would like
to rephrase the question.
1060
00:59:58,512 --> 01:00:02,349
Mr. Falk, would I be
accurate if I described
1061
01:00:02,349 --> 01:00:05,853
your relationship with Mrs.
Cole as totally professional?
1062
01:00:05,853 --> 01:00:08,064
I object, and I move to strike!
1063
01:00:09,231 --> 01:00:11,984
- Mr. Reede, I don't know what you're on,
1064
01:00:11,984 --> 01:00:14,361
but you better get to
the point, and quick.
1065
01:00:16,739 --> 01:00:17,531
- Thank you, sir.
1066
01:00:22,369 --> 01:00:24,538
Is your relationship with
my client entirely platonic?
1067
01:00:24,538 --> 01:00:27,374
Not! Is not your relationship
with my client...
1068
01:00:28,584 --> 01:00:29,502
Bad baby, bad baby!
1069
01:00:30,461 --> 01:00:34,882
Did you ever not make
lo... Did you...
1070
01:00:34,882 --> 01:00:35,758
- Mr. Reede!
1071
01:00:35,758 --> 01:00:38,719
- You had sex with her every
time you met, didn't you? Liar!
1072
01:00:40,096 --> 01:00:41,680
- He's badgering the witness.
1073
01:00:41,680 --> 01:00:42,515
- It's his witness.
1074
01:00:42,515 --> 01:00:44,016
- You slammed her! You dunked her donuts!
1075
01:00:44,016 --> 01:00:45,226
You gave her dog a Snausage!
1076
01:00:45,226 --> 01:00:47,978
You stuffed her like
a Thanksgiving turkey!
1077
01:00:50,689 --> 01:00:53,109
- All right! All right, it's true! Okay!
1078
01:00:53,109 --> 01:00:55,444
I humped her brains out!
There, now you happy?
1079
01:01:02,076 --> 01:01:04,745
- No further questions.
1080
01:01:23,305 --> 01:01:24,098
- No questions.
1081
01:01:26,725 --> 01:01:27,685
- You may step down.
1082
01:01:32,565 --> 01:01:35,734
Do I dare ask you to
call your next witness?
1083
01:01:39,321 --> 01:01:42,241
- I have no further witnesses, Your Honor.
1084
01:01:42,241 --> 01:01:44,785
- What are you doing? Call me!
1085
01:01:44,785 --> 01:01:48,372
- You do not understand. I can't lie.
1086
01:01:48,372 --> 01:01:51,458
I can't do anything
dishonest until 8:15 tonight!
1087
01:01:51,458 --> 01:01:54,670
- Listen, you bastard! I want my money!
1088
01:01:54,670 --> 01:01:57,882
I am not going to end up a 31
year old divorcée on welfare,
1089
01:01:57,882 --> 01:01:59,466
because my scumbag attorney
1090
01:01:59,466 --> 01:02:01,343
had a sudden attack of conscience!
1091
01:02:02,845 --> 01:02:03,679
- 31?
1092
01:02:04,638 --> 01:02:07,016
- If Mr. Reede has no further witnesses,
1093
01:02:07,016 --> 01:02:10,352
then I have no choice
but to rule in favor of--
1094
01:02:10,352 --> 01:02:11,520
- Your Honor!
1095
01:02:14,273 --> 01:02:17,109
I call Samantha Cole to the stand.
1096
01:02:19,528 --> 01:02:21,280
- Order.
1097
01:02:21,280 --> 01:02:23,365
Order!
1098
01:02:23,365 --> 01:02:25,075
Order!
- Knock it off!
1099
01:02:25,075 --> 01:02:25,951
- Sit down!
1100
01:02:28,454 --> 01:02:31,081
Mr. Reede, it is out of
sheer morbid curiosity
1101
01:02:31,081 --> 01:02:33,626
I'm allowing this freak show to continue.
1102
01:02:37,004 --> 01:02:37,796
Mrs. Cole,
1103
01:02:39,006 --> 01:02:39,924
if you dare.
1104
01:02:55,481 --> 01:02:56,690
- Mrs. Cole,
1105
01:02:58,108 --> 01:03:01,695
is this a copy of your driver's license?
1106
01:03:03,572 --> 01:03:05,157
- Yes.
1107
01:03:05,157 --> 01:03:06,700
- It says here you're a blonde. Are you?
1108
01:03:07,743 --> 01:03:09,995
If you don't remember,
perhaps Mr. Falk will.
1109
01:03:09,995 --> 01:03:10,913
- Brunette.
1110
01:03:10,913 --> 01:03:12,665
- We could play the tape
again, maybe it's on there.
1111
01:03:12,665 --> 01:03:14,291
- I'm a brunette!
1112
01:03:15,626 --> 01:03:18,045
- Thank you. Now, let's see.
1113
01:03:18,045 --> 01:03:19,922
"Weight, 105?"
1114
01:03:19,922 --> 01:03:22,007
Yeah! In your bra.
1115
01:03:22,007 --> 01:03:23,175
- Your Honor, I object!
1116
01:03:23,175 --> 01:03:24,051
- You would!
1117
01:03:24,051 --> 01:03:25,094
- Bastard!
- Hag!
1118
01:03:25,094 --> 01:03:27,888
- Quiet! Overruled! Weight?
1119
01:03:29,974 --> 01:03:30,766
- 118.
1120
01:03:32,059 --> 01:03:34,770
All right, fine, fine. I'm 127.
1121
01:03:35,938 --> 01:03:37,940
- And it says here you were born in 1964,
1122
01:03:37,940 --> 01:03:40,609
but that's not true either, is it?
1123
01:03:40,609 --> 01:03:42,403
- Is it?
- No.
1124
01:03:42,403 --> 01:03:43,570
- Can you tell me what it says here
1125
01:03:43,570 --> 01:03:46,448
on your birth certificate
under "Date of Birth."
1126
01:03:46,448 --> 01:03:47,533
- Your Honor, I object.
1127
01:03:47,533 --> 01:03:49,159
What does this have to do with anything?
1128
01:03:49,159 --> 01:03:51,912
- Overruled. Mrs. Cole,
answer the question.
1129
01:03:53,622 --> 01:03:54,415
- "1965."
1130
01:03:56,458 --> 01:03:57,960
- Now let me get this straight.
1131
01:03:59,003 --> 01:04:01,922
That would mean that
you lied about your age
1132
01:04:01,922 --> 01:04:03,924
to make yourself older.
1133
01:04:03,924 --> 01:04:07,219
But why would any woman wanna do that?
1134
01:04:08,345 --> 01:04:10,889
- I changed it so I could get married.
1135
01:04:10,889 --> 01:04:14,935
- And the truth shall set you free!
1136
01:04:16,228 --> 01:04:18,147
My client lied about her age!
1137
01:04:18,147 --> 01:04:20,065
She was only 17 when she got married,
1138
01:04:20,065 --> 01:04:21,859
which makes her a minor,
1139
01:04:21,859 --> 01:04:23,569
and in the great state of California,
1140
01:04:23,569 --> 01:04:26,196
no minor can enter into
any legal contract,
1141
01:04:26,196 --> 01:04:29,116
without parental consent, including...
1142
01:04:29,116 --> 01:04:30,409
- Prenuptial agreements.
1143
01:04:30,409 --> 01:04:33,996
- Prenuptial agreements!
This contract is void!
1144
01:04:33,996 --> 01:04:35,331
The fact that my client has been ridden
1145
01:04:35,331 --> 01:04:37,750
more than Seattle Slew is irrelevant.
1146
01:04:37,750 --> 01:04:39,501
Standard community property applies
1147
01:04:39,501 --> 01:04:41,587
and she is entitled half
of the marital assets
1148
01:04:41,587 --> 01:04:43,547
or $11.395 million!
1149
01:04:44,548 --> 01:04:47,760
Jordan fades back. And that's the game!
1150
01:04:49,219 --> 01:04:51,930
Nothing further, Your Honor.
1151
01:04:58,729 --> 01:05:00,147
- Order.
1152
01:05:00,147 --> 01:05:01,774
Order.
1153
01:05:01,774 --> 01:05:02,566
Order!
1154
01:05:05,819 --> 01:05:07,404
In light of this new evidence,
1155
01:05:07,404 --> 01:05:10,115
the court must rule in favor of Mrs. Cole.
1156
01:05:10,115 --> 01:05:13,869
She is hereby awarded
half the marital assets.
1157
01:05:15,788 --> 01:05:18,290
- The son of a bitch
pulled it off!
1158
01:05:18,290 --> 01:05:19,875
- I didn't know she was under age!
1159
01:05:19,875 --> 01:05:22,127
- It doesn't matter.
The contract's void.
1160
01:05:23,003 --> 01:05:26,256
- Order. Order.
1161
01:05:27,341 --> 01:05:29,510
I understand both parties have agreed
1162
01:05:29,510 --> 01:05:31,470
to joint custody, is that correct?
1163
01:05:31,470 --> 01:05:32,763
- Yes.
- Yes.
1164
01:05:32,763 --> 01:05:35,808
- No. I'm contesting custody.
1165
01:05:35,808 --> 01:05:36,642
- What?
1166
01:05:36,642 --> 01:05:37,976
- If I get sole custody of the kids,
1167
01:05:37,976 --> 01:05:40,979
that's another $10,000 in
child support payments.
1168
01:05:40,979 --> 01:05:42,898
- You just won $11 million!
1169
01:05:42,898 --> 01:05:45,984
- Hey, I'm the victim
here, you said it yourself.
1170
01:05:45,984 --> 01:05:47,820
Now I'm gonna hit him where it hurts.
1171
01:05:49,822 --> 01:05:50,614
- But you...
1172
01:05:51,657 --> 01:05:54,451
You said he was a good father.
1173
01:05:54,451 --> 01:05:55,244
- So?
1174
01:05:58,372 --> 01:06:00,207
- Well, Mr. Reede,
1175
01:06:00,207 --> 01:06:03,085
do we have an agreement on custody or not?
1176
01:06:06,755 --> 01:06:07,548
- No.
1177
01:06:08,882 --> 01:06:09,675
- I see.
1178
01:06:11,135 --> 01:06:12,344
In that case, there will be
1179
01:06:12,344 --> 01:06:16,390
a custody hearing, on
the 19th at 9:00 a.m.
1180
01:06:16,390 --> 01:06:17,891
Court is adjourned.
1181
01:06:25,816 --> 01:06:27,359
- Come on, let's go.
- Daddy!
1182
01:06:27,359 --> 01:06:29,319
- You stop whining, or I'll give you
1183
01:06:29,319 --> 01:06:30,362
something to whine about!
1184
01:06:30,362 --> 01:06:32,865
- I wanna go with daddy!
1185
01:06:32,865 --> 01:06:34,199
- Oh, come here, kids, come on.
1186
01:06:34,199 --> 01:06:36,201
It's all right. Don't you worry.
1187
01:06:36,201 --> 01:06:39,913
I promise we'll be together,
whatever I have to do.
1188
01:06:39,913 --> 01:06:41,623
It's okay. It's okay.
1189
01:06:41,623 --> 01:06:44,626
- Oh, for God's sake, will you
give me those? They're mine!
1190
01:06:44,626 --> 01:06:47,546
Let go of daddy! Let go
of him! Let go of daddy!
1191
01:06:47,546 --> 01:06:50,841
We're leaving now! Lupe, come on!
1192
01:06:50,841 --> 01:06:52,968
Don't you have some checks to write?
1193
01:06:52,968 --> 01:06:55,179
You haven't paid for them yet.
1194
01:07:06,982 --> 01:07:10,027
- I love children.
1195
01:07:10,027 --> 01:07:12,821
They give you so much
leverage in a case like this.
1196
01:07:12,821 --> 01:07:17,367
You did an incredible
job, partner.
1197
01:07:19,119 --> 01:07:23,040
Look at him. He's stunned,
he can't believe it.
1198
01:07:25,167 --> 01:07:28,378
- Your Honor, may I
please approach the bench?
1199
01:07:28,378 --> 01:07:30,339
- We're adjourned, Mr. Reede.
1200
01:07:30,339 --> 01:07:33,967
- Your Honor, I think
we've made a big mistake.
1201
01:07:33,967 --> 01:07:36,762
- Mr. Reede, I am tired and very cranky.
1202
01:07:36,762 --> 01:07:40,516
- I know, but this is
just wrong, isn't it?
1203
01:07:40,516 --> 01:07:43,685
I manipulated the system,
just because you bought it
1204
01:07:43,685 --> 01:07:45,812
doesn't mean I'm right,
it's a technicality!
1205
01:07:46,813 --> 01:07:49,775
- Young man, having my judgment
mocked in my own court,
1206
01:07:49,775 --> 01:07:52,653
is not something I'm prepared to tolerate!
1207
01:07:52,653 --> 01:07:54,029
- Well, maybe you can
tell that to the kids
1208
01:07:54,029 --> 01:07:56,782
when they're adopted by the Manson family!
1209
01:07:56,782 --> 01:07:59,159
- One more word out of you, Mr. Reede,
1210
01:07:59,159 --> 01:08:00,911
and I'll hold you in contempt!
1211
01:08:00,911 --> 01:08:04,498
- I hold myself in contempt!
1212
01:08:04,498 --> 01:08:06,375
Why should you be any different?
1213
01:08:06,375 --> 01:08:07,709
- Bailiff, take him away!
1214
01:08:07,709 --> 01:08:11,547
- This man is a good father,
and children are not leverage!
1215
01:08:11,547 --> 01:08:12,965
Oh, no, don't do this!
1216
01:08:12,965 --> 01:08:16,009
I have a date to play ball with my son!
1217
01:08:16,009 --> 01:08:19,263
I can't be late! It's my last chance!
1218
01:08:19,263 --> 01:08:20,639
I'm Jose Canseco!
1219
01:08:21,640 --> 01:08:23,016
I'm Jose Canseco!
1220
01:08:28,897 --> 01:08:30,190
Phone call! Phone call!
1221
01:08:30,190 --> 01:08:35,153
I get a phone call! I get a
phone call! I get a phone call!
1222
01:08:37,531 --> 01:08:38,448
- Hello?
1223
01:08:38,448 --> 01:08:39,283
- Audrey, it's me.
1224
01:08:39,283 --> 01:08:40,701
For the love of God, don't hang up!
1225
01:08:40,701 --> 01:08:41,994
- I can't talk to you right now.
1226
01:08:41,994 --> 01:08:43,245
Our flight leaves at 8:00.
1227
01:08:43,245 --> 01:08:44,329
- What?
1228
01:08:44,329 --> 01:08:45,622
- I'm taking Max someplace
1229
01:08:45,622 --> 01:08:47,583
where you can't do this to him anymore.
1230
01:08:47,583 --> 01:08:50,294
- Audrey, wait! The most amazing
thing has happened to me.
1231
01:08:50,294 --> 01:08:51,420
I swear, I'm a changed man!
1232
01:08:51,420 --> 01:08:55,007
Just come to the courthouse
with $1,000 and bail me out.
1233
01:08:56,675 --> 01:08:58,385
Hello? Hello!
1234
01:08:58,385 --> 01:08:59,219
- Time's up, pal.
1235
01:08:59,219 --> 01:09:01,763
- No, just one more
call. Just one more call.
1236
01:09:05,475 --> 01:09:07,644
- Okay. Let's go.
1237
01:09:09,146 --> 01:09:09,980
You ready?
1238
01:09:09,980 --> 01:09:10,814
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
1239
01:09:10,814 --> 01:09:12,441
Will you get the door, please?
1240
01:09:12,441 --> 01:09:13,233
- Okay.
1241
01:09:14,401 --> 01:09:15,193
- Thank you.
1242
01:09:16,361 --> 01:09:17,195
- Mr. Reede,
1243
01:09:18,822 --> 01:09:19,615
you made bail.
1244
01:09:20,532 --> 01:09:21,700
- Greta!
1245
01:09:21,700 --> 01:09:23,327
Oh! Thank God!
1246
01:09:23,327 --> 01:09:26,121
- Am I too late? Have you
been sexually molested yet?
1247
01:09:26,121 --> 01:09:27,956
Because I could circle the block.
1248
01:09:30,584 --> 01:09:31,501
- How did you know I was here?
1249
01:09:31,501 --> 01:09:33,795
- One of the other
secretaries called me at home,
1250
01:09:33,795 --> 01:09:36,381
said you went all noble
in front of Mr. Allan.
1251
01:09:36,381 --> 01:09:39,092
- Yeah, I think I'm
fired. Isn't that great?
1252
01:09:39,092 --> 01:09:41,595
Maybe I'll start my own
firm. Do you need a job?
1253
01:09:41,595 --> 01:09:43,305
- I don't think you can afford me.
1254
01:09:48,268 --> 01:09:49,686
- Oh man, I got to get my car.
1255
01:09:49,686 --> 01:09:50,812
Audrey's on her way to the airport.
1256
01:09:50,812 --> 01:09:52,022
I could lose Max forever.
1257
01:09:52,022 --> 01:09:53,940
I can't let that happen. I love him!
1258
01:09:54,816 --> 01:09:57,027
You know, this truth stuff is pretty cool.
1259
01:09:57,027 --> 01:09:59,029
I love my son!
1260
01:09:59,029 --> 01:10:00,155
I love my son!
1261
01:10:01,406 --> 01:10:03,325
I love my son!
1262
01:10:03,325 --> 01:10:04,451
I love my son!
1263
01:10:05,535 --> 01:10:08,580
Hey, need some change? Take everything!
1264
01:10:11,166 --> 01:10:13,335
But it's not gonna make you happy.
1265
01:10:13,335 --> 01:10:15,462
I love my son!
1266
01:10:15,462 --> 01:10:16,588
I love my son!
1267
01:10:17,881 --> 01:10:19,007
I love my son!
1268
01:10:22,386 --> 01:10:24,554
- Hey, there you are!
- Hi.
1269
01:10:24,554 --> 01:10:25,597
- Just in time.
1270
01:10:26,598 --> 01:10:30,102
Oh! This is the happiest
moment of my entire life.
1271
01:10:30,102 --> 01:10:31,561
- Oh!
1272
01:10:31,561 --> 01:10:33,146
Well, mine...
1273
01:10:33,146 --> 01:10:36,233
Well, ours also.
1274
01:10:36,233 --> 01:10:39,236
- Hey, Gipper. I have
something for you, young man.
1275
01:10:40,779 --> 01:10:44,700
Oh! Watch yourself, it's
the claw!
1276
01:10:44,700 --> 01:10:46,368
Oh! The claw's coming at you.
1277
01:10:46,368 --> 01:10:49,955
Oh! You're scared of the claw.
You're scared of the claw.
1278
01:10:51,373 --> 01:10:52,749
- Jerry.
1279
01:10:52,749 --> 01:10:54,292
Jerry.
1280
01:10:54,292 --> 01:10:56,044
It's okay. You don't have to...
1281
01:10:56,044 --> 01:11:00,298
- Tower Air flight
1511 to Boston is now boarding.
1282
01:11:00,298 --> 01:11:01,717
- That's us.
- Yeah.
1283
01:11:01,717 --> 01:11:02,759
- You ready to go?
1284
01:11:02,759 --> 01:11:04,928
- Yes. You ready?
1285
01:11:04,928 --> 01:11:05,762
Okay.
- Great.
1286
01:11:15,021 --> 01:11:15,981
- Excuse me!
1287
01:11:17,107 --> 01:11:20,193
What gate is flight 1511
leaving from? It's an emergency!
1288
01:11:20,193 --> 01:11:22,154
- Gate number 123, but
you'll never make it.
1289
01:11:22,154 --> 01:11:23,238
The flight's already boarding.
1290
01:11:23,238 --> 01:11:25,991
It takes a half hour to
get through security.
1291
01:11:25,991 --> 01:11:27,826
If you wanna go to Boston,
there's another flight
1292
01:11:27,826 --> 01:11:29,536
leaving tomorrow morning at 7:00.
1293
01:11:29,536 --> 01:11:30,495
Flight number 120...
1294
01:11:34,541 --> 01:11:36,418
- Lady
and gentlemen, welcome aboard
1295
01:11:36,418 --> 01:11:40,005
flight 1511, from Los Angeles
to Boston's Logan Airport.
1296
01:11:40,005 --> 01:11:42,424
We'll be departing shortly,
if you need help...
1297
01:11:43,383 --> 01:11:44,217
- Honey, can I help you with those?
1298
01:11:44,217 --> 01:11:45,010
- I'm fine.
1299
01:11:46,720 --> 01:11:47,554
- Are you sure?
1300
01:11:47,554 --> 01:11:49,222
- Jerry, I can open the bag!
1301
01:11:51,391 --> 01:11:53,643
- Would you like anything
to drink before takeoff?
1302
01:11:53,643 --> 01:11:55,896
- Yes. Anything with alcohol, please.
1303
01:11:56,980 --> 01:11:57,814
- Audrey.
1304
01:11:59,900 --> 01:12:01,151
- Now, if
you'll focus on the screen
1305
01:12:01,151 --> 01:12:03,445
ahead of you, we will be
running the safety video.
1306
01:12:03,445 --> 01:12:05,280
- How about that drink?
1307
01:12:27,803 --> 01:12:29,304
- Max!
1308
01:12:29,304 --> 01:12:30,096
Max!
1309
01:12:32,516 --> 01:12:33,308
Max!
1310
01:12:35,560 --> 01:12:36,353
Wait!
1311
01:12:42,442 --> 01:12:44,444
- That ought to do it.
1312
01:12:47,697 --> 01:12:48,782
Hey!
1313
01:12:48,782 --> 01:12:51,368
- Thanks! It's running great!
1314
01:12:59,835 --> 01:13:00,627
Hey!
1315
01:13:02,420 --> 01:13:03,213
Hey!
1316
01:13:04,756 --> 01:13:05,549
Hey!
1317
01:13:18,562 --> 01:13:19,771
Max!
1318
01:13:19,771 --> 01:13:20,647
I'm coming!
1319
01:13:32,117 --> 01:13:33,702
Max!
1320
01:13:42,961 --> 01:13:44,254
Max!
1321
01:13:44,254 --> 01:13:45,797
Max! Where are you?
1322
01:13:51,887 --> 01:13:52,721
- I love you.
1323
01:13:55,807 --> 01:13:56,600
- Thank you.
1324
01:13:58,351 --> 01:14:01,229
- That wasn't exactly the
answer I was looking for.
1325
01:14:01,229 --> 01:14:03,523
- Thank you very much.
1326
01:14:08,361 --> 01:14:10,572
I'm sorry. It's just--
1327
01:14:10,572 --> 01:14:12,407
- Too fast? It was too fast, wasn't it?
1328
01:14:12,407 --> 01:14:13,950
- No, it's--
1329
01:14:13,950 --> 01:14:15,911
- Chemistry? Whatever it
is, we can work on it.
1330
01:14:15,911 --> 01:14:18,204
- No, no, no. It's just that--
1331
01:14:18,204 --> 01:14:20,498
- Oh my God, it's Fletcher!
1332
01:14:20,498 --> 01:14:23,168
- No, no. This has nothing
to do with Fletcher
1333
01:14:23,168 --> 01:14:26,630
- It's Fletcher.
- What?
1334
01:14:26,630 --> 01:14:27,505
- Dad?
1335
01:14:29,049 --> 01:14:34,012
- I made it! I'm late, but I made it!
1336
01:14:34,012 --> 01:14:35,972
- What is he doing?
1337
01:14:35,972 --> 01:14:37,641
- He came to see us off. Wave.
1338
01:14:43,146 --> 01:14:44,773
- I won't let you go!
1339
01:14:53,239 --> 01:14:54,324
Oh! Shit!
1340
01:15:00,372 --> 01:15:04,376
- Control 19, this is Tower
1511 heavy, ready for takeoff.
1341
01:15:04,376 --> 01:15:05,168
- Hey!
1342
01:15:11,675 --> 01:15:12,509
- What was that?
1343
01:15:12,509 --> 01:15:14,469
- Looked like a shoe.
1344
01:15:14,469 --> 01:15:15,428
- Pull over!
1345
01:15:16,763 --> 01:15:18,682
Pull this thing over!
1346
01:15:18,682 --> 01:15:21,851
- Control 19, some idiot has
hijacked a flight of stairs.
1347
01:15:21,851 --> 01:15:22,978
We're gonna stopping this plane.
1348
01:15:22,978 --> 01:15:24,604
- 19 Control, we copy.
1349
01:15:28,608 --> 01:15:29,651
- Yeah!
1350
01:16:08,398 --> 01:16:11,109
Yeah
1351
01:16:11,109 --> 01:16:14,904
You people are all doing a wonderful job!
1352
01:16:14,904 --> 01:16:15,822
- That's far enough, folks.
1353
01:16:15,822 --> 01:16:18,950
- Yeah, he's my husband.
He was my husband.
1354
01:16:18,950 --> 01:16:19,784
- All right, go ahead.
1355
01:16:19,784 --> 01:16:20,618
Okay.
1356
01:16:20,618 --> 01:16:24,247
Max, you stay here with Jerry,
and I'll be right back, okay.
1357
01:16:27,417 --> 01:16:28,418
- Audrey!
- Fletcher!
1358
01:16:28,418 --> 01:16:30,086
- Great news!
1359
01:16:30,086 --> 01:16:31,254
Both my legs are broken,
1360
01:16:31,254 --> 01:16:33,256
so they can't take me right to jail.
1361
01:16:33,256 --> 01:16:36,092
- Fletcher, what were you
doing? Are you out of your mind?
1362
01:16:36,092 --> 01:16:40,972
- No, I'm thinking clear.
I've never been this clear!
1363
01:16:40,972 --> 01:16:41,765
- Dad?
1364
01:16:43,141 --> 01:16:43,933
- Creep.
1365
01:16:45,310 --> 01:16:46,436
- He was getting kind of upset.
1366
01:16:46,436 --> 01:16:48,605
- Are you all right?
1367
01:16:48,605 --> 01:16:49,397
- Yeah.
1368
01:16:50,774 --> 01:16:52,067
I'm hurting here, though.
1369
01:16:53,276 --> 01:16:54,611
I'm a dope, Max.
1370
01:16:55,737 --> 01:16:57,322
All this time, you've been here,
1371
01:16:57,322 --> 01:17:00,158
and I could see you anytime
I felt like it, but I didn't.
1372
01:17:01,409 --> 01:17:03,161
Then your mom told me you
were moving to Boston,
1373
01:17:03,161 --> 01:17:04,329
and I started thinking.
1374
01:17:05,288 --> 01:17:07,290
I could be sitting around sometime and
1375
01:17:08,291 --> 01:17:11,795
wanna look at you and hold
you and play with you,
1376
01:17:13,421 --> 01:17:14,506
and I won't be able to.
1377
01:17:16,633 --> 01:17:18,885
I don't think I'm gonna
do too well with that.
1378
01:17:21,012 --> 01:17:24,516
I love you more than anything
else in the world, Max,
1379
01:17:24,516 --> 01:17:26,184
and you know it's true.
1380
01:17:27,143 --> 01:17:29,521
I couldn't say it if it
wasn't true, not today.
1381
01:17:32,148 --> 01:17:37,112
I love you, and I'll never hurt you again.
1382
01:17:41,074 --> 01:17:44,160
- He's telling the truth,
mom. He's not allowed to lie.
1383
01:17:44,160 --> 01:17:45,286
I made a wish, and anything
1384
01:17:45,286 --> 01:17:47,956
dad says today has to be the truth.
1385
01:17:47,956 --> 01:17:49,249
- Max.
1386
01:17:51,042 --> 01:17:51,876
It's 8:45.
1387
01:17:53,461 --> 01:17:54,921
You made the wish at 8:15.
1388
01:17:55,839 --> 01:17:58,133
I've been able to lie
for the last half-hour.
1389
01:17:59,092 --> 01:18:01,386
- So you weren't--
- No, it was the truth!
1390
01:18:01,386 --> 01:18:03,555
I just wanted to be honest with you.
1391
01:18:03,555 --> 01:18:05,348
I always wanna be honest with you.
1392
01:18:12,313 --> 01:18:13,106
- Mom,
1393
01:18:14,566 --> 01:18:16,985
do we have to go to Boston?
1394
01:18:21,948 --> 01:18:23,533
- No, Max, you don't have to go.
1395
01:18:28,163 --> 01:18:31,708
- I, on the other hand, do
have to, a hospital to run.
1396
01:18:34,252 --> 01:18:36,754
That's an open-ended ticket
if you ever change your mind.
1397
01:18:37,881 --> 01:18:38,673
- Thank you.
1398
01:18:44,220 --> 01:18:45,930
- Looks like he's got his father back.
1399
01:18:45,930 --> 01:18:48,516
- Yeah.
1400
01:19:07,118 --> 01:19:08,453
- Okay, Max, make a wish.
1401
01:19:08,453 --> 01:19:12,916
- Ah! Wait! I don't know
if we should do this.
1402
01:19:12,916 --> 01:19:14,500
- Oh, Fletcher, come on.
1403
01:19:14,500 --> 01:19:16,502
What are the odds of that happening again?
1404
01:19:18,963 --> 01:19:21,341
- Yeah, I guess you're right.
1405
01:19:21,341 --> 01:19:22,634
Okay, Max, go ahead.
1406
01:19:30,683 --> 01:19:31,559
- Mom? Dad?
1407
01:19:48,785 --> 01:19:49,994
- Max!
1408
01:19:54,082 --> 01:19:57,418
Did you wish for your mom and
I to get back together again?
1409
01:19:57,418 --> 01:19:59,379
- No, I wished for Roller blades.
1410
01:20:03,591 --> 01:20:05,343
- Do you wanna cut the cake,
1411
01:20:08,054 --> 01:20:09,681
dad?
1412
01:20:09,681 --> 01:20:10,807
- I'd love to.
1413
01:20:12,016 --> 01:20:14,143
But I have this horrible pain in my arm.
1414
01:20:14,143 --> 01:20:16,145
- Oh! No! It's the claw!
1415
01:20:16,145 --> 01:20:20,441
- No one can stop the claw!
1416
01:20:20,441 --> 01:20:23,361
No one can stop it!
1417
01:20:29,033 --> 01:20:31,160
Nothing can stop the claw!
1418
01:20:54,726 --> 01:20:55,977
If I was a boxer I would
1419
01:20:56,978 --> 01:20:59,230
bounce those things
like Sugar Ray Leonard.
1420
01:20:59,230 --> 01:21:00,064
I'm sorry.
1421
01:21:02,859 --> 01:21:04,610
You brought your kids to your divorce?
1422
01:21:04,610 --> 01:21:06,195
- Sympathy.
- Well, It's working!
1423
01:21:06,195 --> 01:21:09,657
I feel sorry for them already.
1424
01:21:09,657 --> 01:21:12,785
For this you will pay a terrible price.
1425
01:21:15,747 --> 01:21:18,333
Well, it's working! I feel
sorry for them already.
1426
01:21:31,929 --> 01:21:32,930
Mrs. Cole.
1427
01:21:46,944 --> 01:21:47,862
A goose!
1428
01:21:51,866 --> 01:21:52,825
Including...
1429
01:21:52,825 --> 01:21:54,369
- Prenuptial agreements.
1430
01:21:54,369 --> 01:21:56,329
- Prenuptial agreements!
1431
01:22:04,629 --> 01:22:07,882
No! I'd have got him $10,000.
1432
01:22:07,882 --> 01:22:08,716
- Good-bye, Mr. Reede.
1433
01:22:08,716 --> 01:22:13,388
- No! Wait! I didn't
understand...
1434
01:22:36,160 --> 01:22:40,039
Shit. I can't do it.
1435
01:22:40,039 --> 01:22:41,207
Now, let's see.
1436
01:22:41,207 --> 01:22:44,085
"Weight, 105?"
1437
01:22:44,085 --> 01:22:46,087
Yeah, in your bra.
1438
01:22:46,087 --> 01:22:47,088
- Your Honor, I object!
1439
01:22:47,088 --> 01:22:48,005
- You would!
1440
01:22:48,005 --> 01:22:49,674
- Over actor!
- Jezebel!
1441
01:22:55,221 --> 01:22:58,015
- He put me up to it. Tom Shadyac.
1442
01:22:59,809 --> 01:23:00,977
- Yeah, sure he did.
1443
01:23:00,977 --> 01:23:02,395
- Oh, he did.
1444
01:23:02,395 --> 01:23:05,273
- Oh, no.
1445
01:23:05,273 --> 01:23:06,482
They're onto me.
102080
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