Original subtitles

GILES: Previously on Buffy the Vampire Slayer--

We had to hide the key.

Made it human and sent it to you. BUFFY: Dawn.

Tell me what kind of demon I'm fighting.

TRAVERS: Glory isn't a demon. She's a God.

Did you know your sister took my key, Dawnie?

She won't give it back. I bet you know where she put it, don't you?

"They had to be certain the Slayer would protect it with her life,

so they sent the key to her in the form of a sister."

You're the key. Go. Before she finds you. She's here.

-I love you. -The only chance you had with me...

was when I was unconscious.

Let's see what you are.

Or who you are.

One soldier in a vast army.

KNIGHTS: The key is the link. The link must be severed.

Where is the key?

I'd die a thousand deaths before I'd tell you.

(Screaming)

No! No!

Tara!

No!

Tara, I'm so sorry.

-What are you gonna need? -They gave me a lot of stuff to keep her calm.

I told you this wasn't over.

Look at that. Look at that. It's pure green energy.

(chuckles)

(laughs)

(speaking Latin)

(people gasping)

-Buffy! -We have to keep moving.

I can't.

I really hate it when people touch my things.

-Last words, Slay-runt? -Just one: truck.

(tires screeching)

No! Not now, you idiot!

Let go of my body!

Oh, god.

(theme music playing)

And then, whoosh! All of a sudden, Glory's standing right there...

in front of us, all skanky and blond and thinking she's all that

just 'cause some bumpy heads kiss her stinky feet.

She does have nice feet. And she's coming right at us,

and Buffy's just standing there not even blinking,

like "Bring it on," and-- wham!

-Hell bitch in orbit. -Go, Buff.

I knew you'd best Glory eventually. I mean, all our years of training--

A truck hit her.

Oh.

You threw it at her?

Well, no. She more kind of waited for it to hit Glory.

But then Buffy ran really fast, and we got away.

I don't know how we got away.

That truck couldn't have slowed her down for more than a second.

Well, how isn't important. All that matters is that the two of you are safe.

(scoffs) Safe?

We've barely been able to manage not getting seriously dead

every time we've crossed paths with Glory.

Now that she knows that Dawn is the key--

There must be something

in the Book of Tarnis that we've missed,

something that we can use against Glory.

Piano.

Because that's what we used to kill

that big demon that one time.

No, wait. That-- That was a rocket launcher.

An, what are you talking about?

We should drop a piano on her.

Well, it always works for that creepy cartoon rabbit

when he's running from that nice man with the speech impediment.

Yes, or perhaps we could

paint a convincing tunnel on the side of a mountain.

Let's just keep thinking, everyone.

Perhaps we should reassemble at the magic shop-- We can't fight her.

Well, not yet, no.

No. Not ever. She's too strong, Giles.

We're not gonna win this with stakes or spells

or pulling out some uranium power core.

She's a God, and she's coming for us,

so let's just not be here when she starts knocking.

Run away?

Finally, a sensible plan.

That's not what she meant.

-Is it? -We can't stay here.

She'll just kill us off

one by one until there's no one left standing...

between her and Dawn.

Buffy, we all understand the severity of the situation, but there must be another--

No! We stay, we die.

Show of hands for that option.

All right. Nobody goes home. Nobody tells anybody we're leaving.

Just pack up whatever supplies we need, and that's it-- we're gone.

Cool. Don't have to study for that geometry test.

What about wheels?

I don't think everybody's gonna fit in the Xandermobile.

BUFFY: Just get your stuff together.

I'll handle the rest.

This is-- This is terrible.

I'll never be able to mend this. Not really my color anyway.

Oh, yes. Inappropriate humor. (chuckles)

Most amusing. Don't suppose you know what led to this sartorial tragedy.

That's not how it works. You know that. Yes, of course.

I just thought, maybe after Her Magnificent Incandescence

was returned to this manly and... painfully handsome assemblage,

you might have noticed something interesting--

a key in human form, perhaps,

lounging about unattended.

If I did, do you really think I would tell you?

Why do you insist on fighting the inevitable?

No one can stand against Her Blindingly Scrumptious Luminescence.

Glory. Her name is Glory.

And she's your God, you little scab, not mine.

With all due respect and fear of sharp objects,

you exist, sir, only because of her divine greatness.

You mean her divine failure, don't you?

I didn't ask for any of this. I just want to be normal.

We play the hand we're dealt.

Nothing's mine, is it? I mean, this life, this body-- it's all infected.

The only thing I've ever cared about, she's taken away from me.

You know why I wanted to become a doctor?

Flattering drawstring pants?

To be close to people, to witness their lives and their deaths,

to be there alongside them,

a part of everyday humanity.

Maybe it's the drugs.

Drugs, sir?

Find the right combination, keep her buried where she belongs.

Impossible!

Her Magnificence can never be fully contained.

She is a perfect, all-encompassing light,

one you should feel honored to be bathed in.

Oh, yeah, I'm thrilled,

especially with the part where she gets her key back, and I cease to exist.

True. This oh-so-appealing form will of necessity be shrugged off.

Not if I get the key first.

And if you did,

what then? Could you do it?

Take a human life with your own hands?

Oblivion is such a small inconvenience in the service of a deity.

Accept your fate.

I mean, you said it yourself.

This life was never really yours anyway, was it?

It doesn't matter how I came by it.

It's mine, and I plan on keeping it.

Anybody else feel that?

What?

Cold draft of paralyzing fear.

We just need to stay calm.

Calm. Right.

XANDER: Hey, we gotta be like Sergeant Rock--

cool and collected in the face of overwhelming odds.

ANYA: Overwhelming?

How much more than "whelming" would that be exactly?

Look, everything will be all right. We just need to stay here calmly.

-As soon as Buffy arrives-- -(tires screech)

We'll feel oddly worse.

What's he doing here?

Just out for a jaunt. Thought I'd swing by and say howdy.

Out.

He's here because we need him.

-The hell we do. -If Glory finds us, he's the only one besides me

-that has any chance of protecting Dawn. -Buffy, come on.

Look, this isn't a discussion! He stays. Get over it.

(engine idling)

Buckle up, kids. Daddy's puttin' the hammer down.

(engine revving)

Sign here.

(indistinct P.A. announcements)

Okay. That should do it.

See? Did I not tell you how easy it would be for us to--

Hey!

My pen.

The trees are singing water.

-You have him. -Yes, General.

Our brother has returned to the fold.

Welcome home, Orlando.

I swear by my sword your sacrifice will not go unavenged.

Shiny.

Yes. I suppose it is.

Pretty little girl, she's shiny too.

Watch him. Make sure he's comfortable.

So shiny.

Pretty little shiny key.

The key. You've seen it?

Pretty little shiny girl.

The monks, they've made it human.

We know the Slayer's protecting the key.

If what Orlando says is true--

-Prepare to advance. -Yes, sir.

We end this now.

Shouldn't somebody be asking, "Are we there yet?"

Isn't that what small, irritating children do?

That kinda only works if you know where you're going.

(groans) Do we know where we're going yet?

We'd already be somewhere if Captain Slowpoke would give up the wheel.

Hey, Gramps, bloody step on it.

Step on what? I've driven tricycles with more power.

-(R.V. rattling) -Ohh.

Is anybody else queasy?

He doesn't travel well. He's like fine shrimp.

I should've nicked that Porsche I had my eye on.

There's just enough room for me, you and big sis.

What?

Would you give it a rest or--

Or what, you're gonna toss your cookies on my shoes?

Or you can be undead man walking.

See how fast you can hitch a ride with a flaming thumb.

Fine. Shrimp.

(gagging)

That guy is bloodsuckin' the last nerve right out of me.

Well, Buffy has a point. In a confrontation, Spike may prove...

useful.

I don't know if Buffy's thinking too clear on that one...

or anything else right now.

I've never seen her so--

She's been through more than her fair share of late.

She just needs a chance to catch her breath, regroup.

GILES: She'll be all right.

Yeah. She'll--

XANDER: Yeah.

Any luck?

If you define luck as the absence of success, plenty.

There's a couple barrier spells,

but they only work on a fixed locus.

I haven't found anything that will work while we're still moving.

So pretty. Can I have one?

Oh, come on.

Um, anyone hungry?

ANYA: Ooh! Snacks!

The secret to any successful migration.

Who's up for some tasty fried meat products?

-Hey! Ow! -Tara, no!

-(Tara crying) -WILLOW: What did I tell you?

Shh. I'm sorry. She didn't mean to.

(Tara continues crying)

- She doesn't know what she's doing. - We know.

No biggie. Look, the skin's already stopped smoking.

You go ahead and play peekaboo with Mr. Sunshine all you like.

It keeps the ride from getting boring.

All the light's gone.

No. Shh, baby. The light's still outside, okay?

All dark. All dark.

-Dark. -PATIENTS: Dark.

-All dark.

-Soon. -Dark.

-PATIENTS: Soon. Soon. -Dark. Dark.

Soon. Soon.

(Patients continue murmuring) Soon. Dark.

It's coming. The signs are in alignment.

Soon victory will be in our grasp.

All we need do is seize the moment

and squeeze until it bleeds.

DAWN: Hey.

I think Anya's gonna try to cook.

Wanna come watch the tears and recriminations?

Maybe later.

Thanks.

For what?

You know. Pretty much everything.

Yeah. I'm doing a great job.

You are.

I'm the Slayer, the Chosen One.

All mythic and defendery.

Evil nasties are supposed to flee from me,

not the other way around.

You're not fleeing.

You're... moving at a brisk pace.

Quaintly referred to in some cultures as the big scaredy runaway.

It's the most amazing thing anyone's ever done for me.

It just keeps coming.

Glory, Riley,

Tara, Mom.

I know,

but there's a bright side.

There is?

At least things can't get any crazier, right?

-(arrow impacts) -(gasps)

You know this is your fault for saying that.

MAN: Come out now!

Bring up the ranks! Advance!

(man shouts)

(sighs)

(horses neigh)

-Giles! -I see them.

SPIKE: See who?

(arrow whooshes)

-XANDER: Arrows! -SPIKE: Bloody hell!

-They're throwing arrows. -(arrow impacts)

Dawn, get down under the table.

-Horsies! -(neighs)

-Tara! -(arrows impacting)

-Weapons? -Hello! You're driving one.

Don't hit the horsies.

We won't.

Aim for the horsies.

Did we shake 'em?

Stay low! Watch out for--

Oh!

Now might be a good time for something heroic.

Xander, hatch!

(grunts) Up!

-Keep the pressure on. -Always do, sweet bit.

(screaming)

(shouting)

Not a piano, but hey.

(exhales)

Everyone all right?

(grunts)

XANDER: We gotta find shelter. SPIKE: Yeah. Right bloody quick.

I'm burnin' up out here.

(Giles groaning)

BUFFY: Careful. Spike?

-Careful. -Up.

-Okay. Wil? -I'm on it. Oh, careful!

-Are you sure you're okay? -Yeah, but Spike's hurt.

-Ow! Easy with the delicates. -They'll heal.

Florence Bloody Nightingale to the rescue.

ANYA: Um, you have another plan, right?

One that doesn't involve pointy knives and a Winnebago?

Well, we'll rest here for a minute, but then we have to keep moving.

-Where? -I don't know!

Uh, we just-- we-- we can't-- We can't stay here. It's too close to the wreck.

-We're too easy to find. -Buffy!

Wil, how is he?

BUFFY: Wil?

I think I've slowed the bleeding, but--

Okay. Okay, just-- just give me a minute.

-Dawn, down! -Oh!

(whimpering)

XANDER: We got company.

And they brought a crusade.

-(glass shattering) -Yeah!

-Willow! -I'm working on it!

Right!

Let's go! Let's go! Come on! Let's move it! Move it! Move it!

(screams)

Buffy!

(indistinct shouting)

The key.

Enemies high and tall. Circling arms, raise a wall.

(angry chattering)

(grunts)

They have the general. Clerics!

(chanting)

Energy barrier. A most powerful one.

-Can it be breached? -A witch's magic pales to the might of our God.

The infidels' wall shall tumble before us.

Wil, how long will it hold?

Half a day maybe.

(chanting)

Or until Heckle and Jeckle punch a hole through it.

So, what's the story with these role-playing rejects?

BUFFY: Let's find out.

You sure Scarface here can hab the English?

He understands me.

Don't you?

You were warned we would return, Slayer.

Took you long enough.

What are you supposed to be, some kind of chief?

General.

General.

In charge of what, getting captured?

You do not frighten me, child.

The instrument of chaos must be destroyed.

Look at her that way again, and she will be the last thing you ever see.

As I've been told, you protect the key of The Beast.

-It's not that simple. -Yes.

The key has been transformed, given breath, life.

Yet, this makes no difference.

The key is the link. The link must be severed.

Such is the will of God.

She doesn't remember anything about being this key you're all looking for.

The only thing that she remembers

is growing up with a mother and a sister that love her.

What kind of God would demand her life

for something that she has no control over?

We are not your enemy.

Tell your men to stand down.

No. It is not her fault! She's human now!

The key is too dangerous to be allowed to exist,

no matter what form it has been pressed into.

-I will not let anyone tell me-- -(Tara cries)

WILLOW: Shh! Shh!

-Shh. Shh. (shushing) -What happened?

I don't know. She just went nuts.

-(whimpering) -Shh. Shh.

Time! T-T-Time!

WILLOW: Tara. Tara.

(grunting)

Tara!

We have to do something.

She can't just stay this way. Buffy.

-Time, time, time. -Shh.

PATIENTS: Time, time, time.

Time, time, time.

No, it's not time for your meds. Just lie back and--

Time! Time! Time!

Doctor! Dr. McCarthy!

Time. Time. Time.

Time. Time. Time.

Time. Time. Time. Time.

-It's time. It's time. -No, no. Shh.

There's nothing to fear, my brother.

The Beast may have taken your mind,

but I swear to you,

she will never know the taste of your heart.

(stabs)

Clerics!

I want the witch's barrier down. Now!

(chanting)

I'm sorry.

What for?

We should've stayed.

If we had, none of this would've happened. Don't.

What you did...

w-was necessary,

what I've always admired.

Uh, running away?

Being able to place your heart above all else.

I'm so proud of you. You've come so far.

You're everything a Watcher--

everything I could have hoped for.

Willow.

Open a door.

Speak. One of my friends was hurt when you attacked us.

And 10 of my men are dead. Honorable men.

Shall we balance the scale?

Will you let someone come and help him or not?

Give quarter to an agent of The Beast?

What madness would move me to such action?

-I'm done asking. -Whoa! Whoa, hey. Uh...

This is war, isn't it?

And if there's one thing I've learned from Sergeant Rock is...

in war, there are rules.

Or at least there should be,

if you're as honorable as you think you are.

Plus we do have your General Forehead guy.

Discharge and bring life.

Handier than a Swiss knife.

Look, the door to my crypt's got this nasty squeak. Maybe you could--

Hey, uh, it's Buffy.

I need to ask you a really big favor.

You, uh, forgot to mention the costume party outside.

Sorry. I didn't know who else to call.

No, it's okay.

I mean, yeah, not how I pictured seeing you again,

but, uh, I'll take what I can get.

Thank you... for coming.

My pleasure.

(panting)

All right. I think I got him stabilized, but there's a lot of damage.

We need to get him out of here.

Well, I think the guys with the pointy swords kinda have other ideas.

Don't they always?

Look, I know this must seem extra Outer Limits to you.

This? No, I've seen things you wouldn't believe.

You know, emergency room, full moon on a Saturday night.

Look, if this gets too weird, just tell me. I'll understand.

Don't worry about me. I won't leave until I've worn out my welcome.

(panting)

Ow.

Thanks.

You know those things will kill you.

Oh. Right.

I mention today how much I don't like you?

You might have let it slip in... once or twice.

-How are your feelers? -(sighs)

It's nothing compared to the little bits we're gonna get chopped into

when the Renaissance Faire kicks the door in.

And here we bloody sit.

It's not like we got much of a choice. We could make a break for it.

Use General Armor All as a shield,

-get to the doc's car, and-- -Great plan.

and while all the hacking and slashing's going on, what are you gonna be doin', huh?

Throwin' migraines at 'em? Look, we stay here, we all die.

At least this way, some of us might get-- BUFFY: No.

We're all gonna make it.

I'm not losing anyone.

Check the supplies. See if anyone's hungry.

(General laughs)

Dissension in the ranks.

Seldom a harbinger of glad tidings.

Shut up.

Poor, frightened girl.

You've no idea what you've gotten yourself into.

Why don't you tell me? Would it make a difference?

What do you know of The Beast?

Strong, fast, hell-god.

From a dimension of unspeakable torment.

A demon dimension. I know.

She ruled with two other hell-gods, right?

Along with The Beast, they were a triumvirate of suffering and despair,

ruling with equal vengeance.

But The Beast's power grew beyond even what they could conceive,

as did her lust for pain and misery.

They looked upon her, what she had become, and trembled.

-A God afraid? -Such was her power.

They feared she would attempt to seize their dimension for herself...

and decided to strike first.

A great battle erupted.

In the end, they stood victorious over The Beast.

Barely. She was cast out,

banished to this lower plane of existence,

forced to live and eventually die...

trapped within the body of a mortal,

a newborn male created as her prison.

That is The Beast's only weakness.

Kill the man, and the God dies.

Unfortunately, the identity of the human vessel has never been discovered.

I don't understand. Now, I've seen Glory.

Not a whole lot going on in the hairy chest department.

You have seen a glimpse of the true beast.

Her power was too great to be completely contained.

She's found a way to escape her mortal prison for brief periods

before her energies are exhausted

and she's forced back into her living cell of meat and bone.

What about me? What about the key?

-Dawn. -I want to know.

The key is almost as old as The Beast itself.

Where it came from, how it was created,

the deepest of mysteries.

All that is certain is that its power is absolute.

Countless generations of my people

have sacrificed their lives in search of it

to destroy it before its wrath could be unleashed.

But the monks found it first.

Yes, and hid it with their magics.

Why didn't they just destroy it? If the key is as dangerous as--

Because they were fools.

They thought they could harness its power for the forces of light.

They failed and paid with their blood.

What do I do? What was I created for?

You were created to open the gates that separate dimensions.

The Beast will use your power to return home

and seize control of the hell she was banished from.

(laughs) That's it?

That's Glory's master plan? To go home?

You misunderstand. Once the key is activated,

it won't just open the gates to The Beast's dimension.

It's going to open all the gates.

The walls separating realities will crumble.

Dimensions will bleed into each other.

Order will be overthrown, and the universe will tumble into chaos.

All dark... forever.

That is what you were created for.

Dawn.

You think it's true... what he said?

(sighs)

I don't know.

Destroyer of the universe.

I guess cutting school doesn't seem so bad now, huh?

It's not you. You know that.

But it's in me, isn't it?

It's inside me.

What are we gonna do?

I won't let anything happen to you.

I promise.

(sighs)

Wriggling.

Come on, Tara. You have to eat something. (whimpers)

Want me to try?

Don't know. I'm gettin' used to pickin' fruit outta my hair.

You.

You are not a part of this, are you?

-Just a friend of the family. -Would you die for them?

Because that is what your future holds

if you align yourself with the Slayer and her misguided people.

It's my life, and I'll do what I please with it.

It's not just your life.

Unimaginable legions will perish, including everyone here.

You can stop this.

You can save all their lives by ending one.

The little girl. The key.

Destroy it, and the will of The Beast will be broken.

She will fade, a distant memory,

and all of this madness will end.

(Giles panting)

-(gasps) -Sorry.

Is-- Is he gonna be okay?

He was hurt pretty bad, Dawn.

It's because of me.

It's all my fault.

No, it isn't.

You don't know what's happening.

I don't have to.

I just know that sometimes terrible things happen to good people.

It shouldn't, but it does.

It's nobody's fault.

That's just the way life is.

Is that gonna help?

-(struggling breaths) -Ben?

-You have to let me out. -Ben?

You don't understand. I gotta get out! Open a door now!

What happened? I-I don't know. He just freaked out.

-Let me out! -Okay. Wil, open a door.

No! Ha!

Well, what do you know? Little Ben finally did something right.

-The Beast. -Hey, it's Gregor.

Now it's not.

(yells)

Buffy!

MAN: The Beast! Prepare to attack!

(swords clashing)

-Dawn! -(men screaming)

Willow! Get it down now!

Hear, hear my plea, circling arms protecting me.

We have to--

The Beast.

The car. Get the keys.

Buffy. Buffy, we have to find Dawn. We can't let Glory--

Buffy, Buffy.

Buffy, you have to get up. We need you.

WILLOW: Buffy, please! Buffy!

Grr! Arrgh!