Original subtitles

Sorry.

- Shalom. - Hi, how are you?

- Welcome. - Thank you.

Please.

You think you can turn it down a little bit?

Thank you. Thank you.

Here we go.

Oh, we're here.

- Yeah. - Great.

Thank you very much and keep the change.

- Oh wow, thank you. - You're welcome.

- There you go. - Thank you.

Enjoy.

Oh, hello.

I'm not sure I have the... the right place.

This is apartment 6, isn't it?

Yeah...

Oh.

I'm Michael.

I'm... I'm subletting the apartment.

Yeah. Yes, no, but that's tomorrow.

You have the wrong day.

No, I don't, I don't think so.

Here.

Okay, so here it says the 8th.

Right.

And that's tomorrow, tomorrow is the 8th.

No, tomorrow is the 9th.

Today is the 8th.

- Today is the 8th? - Yeah.

Fuck. I was sure today's the 7th.

Come. Come, please come in.

- Are you sure? - Yeah, yeah.

I'm sorry about the mess.

I'm really sorry about the mess,

we were up all night shooting something for my class

and I didn't sleep for two days now

so I just forgot what day it is.

I was sure today is the 7th.

Just give me a few minutes and I will organize everything, okay?

I will make this place look good as new.

Excuse me.

Yeah?

Yeah, actually, I... I think it might be better

if I just book myself into a hotel.

No! Please, please, I'm almost finished.

- Five minutes. - No, no, thank you, but...

I think I'd be better off if I stayed at a hotel...

Listen, I promise, I...

Sorry, I have to answer, it's my mom

and she won't stop calling me if I don't answer, so...

Come. I will show you the house.

There are a lot of things.

Do you really wanna go to a hotel?

Look around you, this is like the coolest neighborhood ever.

You know there was even a...

an article in TimeOut London

about the sexiest neighborhoods in the world

and guess who won?

Please stay.

I'm sorry about my fuck-up,

but I promise you, this is a great apartment.

And...

I don't know how else to say it, but...

I really need the money.

Shit.

- Oh, hi. - Hi.

Hang on just a second.

I'm just trying to...

Who are you murdering over there?

Just trying to open a bottle of wine.

With a knife?

Couldn't find a corkscrew.

There we go.

Tried you earlier,

I was getting worried.

Oh yeah, sorry, my... my battery died.

Okay.

So how, how was your flight?

Did you get some sleep?

Not much.

Why didn't you take a pill?

I did. Two of them.

- Oh. - I've gotta get Berger

to give me something stronger when I get back.

I... thought he did.

I wish he had.

He said he'd think about raising the dose when I get back.

Okay.

So how's Tel Aviv?

Ah, I haven't seen that much of it.

It's kind of a strange mixture.

Not sure I can figure it out.

You always say that, and you always do by the fifth day.

I guess.

How's the apartment?

The apartment...

It's decent.

Decent?

It's okay, you know.

Well, why... why don't you show me around?

Ah, let's see...

Here we go.

There's the bathroom, you don't wanna go in there.

There's my desk.

Very low-hanging chandelier,

something like that.

And here is the living room,

you know, it's pretty standard.

Wait. What's, what's that on the wall?

That is "Nightmare on Elm Street."

Oh, part two!

"Freddy's Revenge."

Who hangs movie posters in their living room?

He's a kid.

I think he's a film student or something.

Ah, a room with a view.

Wouldn't go that far.

Just the other buildings,

here are the neighbors over there.

It's too dark to see anything

but it's actually a pretty cool location.

It was just chosen by TimeOut London

as one of the sexiest new neighborhoods in the world, so...

Well, TimeOut London makes mistakes too.

You're such a snob.

Here we are back in the kitchen.

Wait, wait...

Go back to the fridge.

Is that the kid?

Zoom in.

Yep, that's him.

Oh my god, he's hot!

Oh, stop. You could be his dad.

But I'm not.

Is he gay?

I don't know.

Okay, I can see you're not in the mood.

I'm sorry, I'm just exhausted.

Fine, I understand.

- Go to bed. - Okay.

- Good night. - Good night.

And don't forget to take your pills.

I won't, I won't, don't worry.

- I love you. - Love you too.

David Tartakover

is best known for his politically provocative posters.

His style features minimalist compositions

that use images taken from the media,

mixed with slogans and text,

inspired by Russian Constructivism.

He has said:

"My work is often considered a protest.

"It's not. It's a reaction.

"You have to go with the truth all the way.

"Otherwise, what have you accomplished?"

In one iconic poster, a little boy with one eye shut,

possibly shot by a soldier,

is juxtaposed with a child's drawing of a flower

and the words:

"Daddy, what are you doing in the occupied territories?"

One of his most famous works

was the logo he designed for the Peace Now Movement

in 1978.

The deceptively simple logo combines the words "Peace" and "Now"

and uses no other symbol or design.

It became the first widely used political sticker in Israel.

His work began to criticize the political establishment

even more sharply after the euphoric...

Hello?

Hi, is this David?

No. This is his husband, Michael.

Hi, Michael, it's Suzanne Shrib calling

from the IBS clinic.

Oh, hi, Suzanne.

Actually I have some terrific news for you and David.

What's that?

We've located a new surrogate for you.

I'm sorry, I'm not sure I understand.

Well, of course we'd like to set up an appointment for both of you to meet her

and give you a chance to form an impression,

see how you feel.

She's young, very bright,

she's getting an MSW at Rutgers.

Sorry, when was the last time you spoke with David?

Oh, about a month ago.

I promised I'd give him a call the moment we had a match.

Oh, hi.

Sorry, I didn't know if you're awake.

I just wanted to take something I left here.

Oh, no worries, come on inside.

I'll take it and leave, it's in my room, one minute.

Sorry, man, I just had to grab my weed.

Can't really fall asleep without it.

Yeah, sure, totally get that.

So, you're good?

You're okay? Need anything from me?

- You want some of this maybe? - No, no, I'm good, thank you.

Hey, you hungry?

I just bought some breakfast, you're welcome to join me.

- "Sweetbox"? - Yeah, according to my research

it's the best bakery in town.

What?

It's funny that someone has to come from New York

to tell me that the best bakery in town is just around the corner.

Are they good?

You're welcome to try one.

To tell you the truth, I don't really eat anything before lunch.

My breakfast is just black coffee and a cigarette.

- Do you mind? - Actually...

So,

what are you doing in Israel, if it's okay to ask?

Of course, I'm a travel writer.

I write a column for The New York Times.

- Really? - Yeah, it's called "The Intrepid Traveler."

"Intrepid"?

Intrepid, it means...

I don't know, resourceful? Brave?

Someone who won't give up,

who's strong in the face of adversity.

It's just a name though.

So you're not really intrepid?

I try to be.

The idea is to write about the...

the city as it really is.

The local city, not the... the touristy version.

It's your first time in Tel Aviv?

It's actually my second.

I was here for my Bar-Mitzvah.

But that was in Jerusalem about 100 years ago.

Probably wasn't such a great visit

if it took you so long to come back.

You are right about that.

It was kind of a difficult visit.

My parents were...

They were constantly fighting.

In fact, a couple of months after that they were divorced.

- Oh... - Yeah.

So what did they say when you told them that you're coming back here?

Who?

Oh, my parents, oh.

My mom passed away couple of years ago.

I'm sorry, I have to remember

not to ask people over 50 this question,

I always do that.

It's okay.

My dad is still very much alive and...

I think he'll be happy when I tell him I came back.

Well, I hope this time you'll have a better experience.

- Yeah. - I think Israelis really try to be nice to tourists.

Yeah, they wanna feed you, they wanna tell you stories,

speak English with you

even if they don't know how to speak English.

They just want you to like them.

Why do you think that is?

I don't know.

Maybe it's because we are in the Middle East,

but we wanna be treated like we are in the West.

Wow.

Can I quote you on that?

Are you making fun of me?

'Cause I was only trying to...

No, no, I wasn't. I meant that.

That was interesting.

Okay.

So what's the plan?

- You have a plan, right? - Oh, yes, yes.

Not only do I have a plan,

I have a list.

Everything that's highlighted in yellow,

that's top priority, then...

Neve Tzedek.

Sarona, Manta Ray Beach,

Tel Aviv Museum.

Aren't all those the must-sees?

Yeah, yeah,

if you are a Jewish princess on her Birthright tour, yeah.

These places are like the most clich� thing ever.

Florentin?

Yeah, we're not gonna go to Rothschild Boulevard,

you've been there enough.

What's wrong?

They stole my fucking bike.

Second time in six months.

Alright...

Alright, just calm down.

I'm not sure I follow,

you're saying you actually know who stole your bike?

Not exactly,

but if I'm lucky they sold it to the bike shop over there.

Last time those fuckers stole my bike, I found it there.

He's lying, he said it's not my bike.

He wants me to pay 500 shekels for my bike.

Why don't you just call the police? It's your bike.

Forget it, I don't want to do that.

Why not?

The police in this area are racists

and the immigrants, the money they'll have to pay a lawyer,

they'll have to steal another 30 bikes.

That's decent of you.

I don't think I could be that cool about it.

I mean, it is your bike, after all.

I know, I'm gonna come back later.

I know this guy's son, I'll talk to him.

Want some juice?

Sure.

This is the best pomegranate juice you're gonna get in Tel Aviv.

Maybe in the world.

Do you have small change maybe?

Thanks.

Oh, you're right, this is good.

I told you.

Thirsty, huh?

Yeah.

You hungry?

A little.

'Cause there's a great restaurant I know with really great Israeli food.

Sounds good.

But we'll have to wait till 3:00.

Why?

'Cause they have a Happy Hour.

Yeah, all the food is half price.

Well, it's two hours from now.

If you're hungry, we can go now.

I'm happy to pay.

No, no. It's okay, I can wait.

It's our special hummus with "ful," like fava beans.

Sounds good to me.

- So, two hummus with ful. - Yeah.

One meat soup, one Israeli salad,

and rice with beans.

- Okay. - Sounds great.

How about some shots? On the house?

No, no, I'm great, thank you.

Okay.

You never say no to free shots.

I'm fine with beer,

it's a little early in the day for me to start drinking arak.

Don't worry, I'll drink yours.

That's for you.

That's for you.

- L'chaim. - L'chaim.

So...

Do you write only about travel or also about other things?

What do you mean?

I googled you.

I saw you wrote a book once,

unless there's another writer named Michael Green.

"Complications,"

it says it was a "thrilling debut."

Yes, that was many, many, many years ago.

What was it about?

It's about the world I lived in back then.

New York City in the late '80s, early '90s.

What, like AIDS and stuff like that?

Well...

That's so depressing,

why does everything always has to go back to that?

Well, I didn't go back, I was there.

I sort of wrote the book in real-time.

My first boyfriend, he... he died of AIDS.

Fuck.

Enjoy.

Thank you.

Thanks.

Is that not what you ordered?

It is, but I said no onion.

I hate it.

How do you eat food without onions,

that's what gives it all the flavor.

Ichs.

What?

Ah, "ichs," it's like Hebrew for "yuck."

Ah.

Icks.

Not "icks." Ichs.

Ichs.

So, um, what about you, Tomer?

What kind of movies do you wanna make in the future?

Why in the future? I'm already making them.

Oh, great.

So, what are they about?

What are they about?

It's hard to explain.

It's kind of "artistic horror," I guess,

but I don't wanna, like, put it in a box, you know? I...

I wanna make films that will punch you in the face, you know?

I'd rather make my audience vomit than just being fine with it.

Yeah, I think cinema should physically shake you up,

like, like a rollercoaster.

Okay.

You have my number if you need anything.

Yeah. You have everything you need from the apartment?

Yeah.

Where are you staying?

Last night I went to my mother,

but I don't do it again, it's too far.

Where will you be tonight?

Not sure.

You know what's the shittiest thing?

Maybe I forgot to lock them.

I forget sometimes.

So, have fun, yeah?

Enjoy real Tel Aviv.

Wait.

What don't you just stay here tonight?

Until you figure something out.

Thanks, but it's cool.

I'm used to subletting my place and crashing at other people's.

- Are you sure? - Yeah.

I mean, you could stay on the sofa.

Maybe in return you could continue to be my tour guide.

Keep showing me around the city like you did today?

- Are you serious? - Yeah.

What if I'm like, a serial killer?

Or you, you could be a serial killer. I mean,

you never know.

It's that one.

So, I could just be here.

And you don't have to worry about me.

Okay.

Very well done.

Okay.

Anything else?

Horror movies aren't really my thing, to be honest. I...

- I don't always understand - You don't need to understand.

It's... it's what you feel.

It's a physical experience.

Oh, so, it's not meant to be scary?

It's not meant to be anything,

it's what you bring to it, it's...

it's what you see.

Oh, interesting.

"Interesting..."

What?

You're probably into what?

Romantic comedies, musicals?

Is that a crime?

No,

but it's very unoriginal to be a gay man who loves musicals.

What, do you have like a poster of Liza Minnelli in your living room?

What's wrong with musicals?

Nothing, and that's the problem.

Everyone is so happy and so gay.

And what's wrong with that?

It's not a question of wrong, it's a question of...

Not all of us like cheesy romance and happy endings.

Tomer!

Michael, Daria. Daria, Michael.

Hey, it's nice to meet you.

We just saw you in Tomer's film,

you were very good.

Don't believe him, he didn't like it.

I did.

You're welcome to come in.

Daria and her boyfriend Amir had a fight.

We didn't fight, we broke up.

Don't worry, this happens every two weeks.

I think they do it just to have a lot of make-up sex.

This time it's different, Tomer.

- What did he do this time? - What did he do?

Well, right in the middle of rehearsal he stops everything

and says I'm ruining the dance.

Me?

He cursed me in fucking Arabic

and it wasn't about anything that happened in the rehearsal,

it was all about something I said about his family a few days ago.

What did you say about his family?

That maybe he shouldn't invite them.

That maybe it's not for them,

maybe it's too provocative.

I didn't say it in a racist way, you know?

In what?

- Racist way! - Oh.

Fuck, I don't know if I want my parents to come either.

Daria and Amir have a dance show that opens tomorrow.

Oh, great! I love dance.

Yeah.

Here, you're invited.

Oh, it's interesting.

Is this Arabic?

Yes, Amir is Arabic.

And also a pain in the ass.

So everything we do has to have Arabic in it.

Even if it's not connected at all.

Tomorrow is their premiere and then they're moving to Berlin together.

- Yeah... - Wait, you're leaving Israel?

Yes.

But I thought you were breaking up.

We are breaking up.

So why are you moving to Berlin with him?

My best friend is dumping me.

I told you, you could come too,

but you didn't want to.

Of course I want to but I need to finish university first, you know.

Tomer can't move away

because his mother is stuck in the kibbutz.

He will never leave her.

That's bullshit.

So, what do you plan on doing in Berlin?

Basically the same thing, dance,

only with some more people in the audience.

Maybe there I can afford more than a kid's meal at McDonald's.

Wow.

Is that the big dream then?

What, a Big Mac?

Oh, no, I'm fine. Thank you.

I don't know...

I guess I've just given up trying to make it happen here.

Why?

It's so hard to be an artist here, you know?

You have to beg the government for budgets

and then pray that anyone comes,

especially if your partner is a Palestinian.

A couple of years ago, we had a big new show.

A week before the premiere,

everything in Gaza got crazy.

Like, missile attacks, bombings,

you know, all that shit.

And at the end we performed in front of three people.

Tomer was one of them.

Well, I hate to be the guy who says, "When I was your age," but...

"When I was your age..."

But, really,

we protested, we got arrested.

We did everything we could to change the world.

Maybe it wasn't very much,

but some... some things did change.

I don't know,

maybe this is my protest,

to leave this place and think only of myself for once.

To really live,

not only survive.

Isn't it odd that you're moving to Germany?

A place that symbolizes Jewish tragedy.

What's so funny?

Nothing, we're just high, but you know that Berlin is like

the coolest place for many years.

Tons of young Israelis move there.

Come.

Michael!

Hey.

Look what I have.

- Wow. - I cut class today

and on the way here I stopped at this like second-hand bookshop

and that's where I found it.

How cool is that?

Tomer.

Bye.

Is that your boyfriend?

I don't have a boyfriend.

We're just hanging out, that's all.

He wanted more, but I'm not into all that.

Why?

Just not.

People today are so desperate for love and relationships,

so when they meet someone cool

they immediately want to define and label and...

I mean, why would I wanna have sex with only one person, you know?

I don't wanna tie myself down to anyone.

A man, a woman.

One partner, two partners,

even 100 partners, you know? I just...

I want to enjoy everything life has to offer.

Sure, but one of the things this world has to offer is the...

the love of another human being.

Some might even say it's the best thing life has to offer.

Do you still fuck?

Excuse me?

You and...

David, you still have sex?

- Well... - You don't have to answer this question

- if you don't want to. - No, no.

I'm perfectly okay answering, it's just that, well...

Yeah, we do occasionally have sex.

Occasionally?

What does it mean?

What does that mean? It means occasionally.

Obviously, as a relationship evolves

some things happen less frequently than they once did.

And I'm not just talking about sex.

Lots of things change.

So you have an open relationship?

No...

Not as far as I know.

Wow.

I can't imagine no sex-life, I mean, that would kill me.

Well, I didn't say there was no...

Forget about sex, just...

kissing.

I mean, don't you miss it? Like...

Like a really good kiss that makes you forget about everything,

you know?

You're a funny one.

Why?

Because for Mr. I-don't-want-a-boyfriend-

no-happy-endings,

you sound pretty romantic about the power of a kiss.

I'm gonna take a shower.

Hey! Hey!

It's okay, it's okay. Shh...

Shh...

Hey!

He fell in the water.

I'm sorry, I was just worried he might...

- Michal! - I was just, I was only trying to help,

I saw the baby going in the water.

I was only trying to help, I saw him fall and...

It's okay.

I'm really sorry.

- Come on. - It's okay, forget about it.

Jesus.

Hey you.

Hi.

Everything okay?

Yeah, everything's fine.

Tried you earlier.

I know, I was busy.

Okay, listen, I just, I talked to Suzanne,

I know she called you earlier,

she wasn't supposed to do that.

I'm really sorry, okay?

But let's just wait till you get home

and we can talk about this together,

just the two of us.

I mean, at the end of the day, this is good news, right?

Yeah, I thought it was something we were supposed to be doing together.

Michael, come on,

you realize this is just the first step of a very long process.

- Don't you remember? - I realize you want this more than I do,

enough to, you know, go get the ball rolling behind my back.

No, actually, I...

Michael, no balls are rolling

and if you don't wanna talk to her

I will call Suzanne and I will let her know.

But from the information that has been shared with me

this woman sounds pretty amazing.

- Maybe even better than Ashley. - I don't wanna meet her.

I don't wanna meet anyone.

Wait, what do you mean?

I want us to let it go.

- Let what go? - You know what.

This, the baby.

All of it.

Maybe it was a mistake.

Michael, I'm very sorry this happened,

but you don't get to just unilaterally decide this,

- we got to talk about... - Hold on.

Sorry to disturb, but we need to go if we don't wanna be late.

Of course, just give me a second.

Okay.

Who was that?

It was my... landlord.

He's invited me to a dance thing.

A dance thing?

Yes, some of his friends are performing at something,

I really should get going.

Fine.

- Enjoy the dance. - Yeah, okay.

Come dance with us.

Ah, I think I'm gonna go home.

- What? - Yeah, I've had a few too many drinks

and you know, all the jetlag.

Have some MD.

- What? - MDMA, it will wake you up.

I'm good, thank you.

Ever tried it?

Ah, yes, I've tried some back in my twenties.

The 1920s?

Very funny.

Go, go, have a good time.

I'll see you back home.

Wow, home already?

What, the party is over?

You're wearing pajamas.

Yes, I am, and?

Who wears pajamas?

A lot of people.

Really? Where? In Downton Abbey?

Well, my dad wore pajamas, my grandfather did as well,

which makes me a proud third-generation pajama wearer.

Exactly, it's a grandfather thing.

Why do you always gotta make me feel like such an old man?

I'm sorry, I didn't mean to do that,

I don't see you as an old man, really.

What's that?

This guy on "Atraf."

"Atraf"?

The Israeli Grindr.

Oh, okay.

So this guy is texting me all the time

and he wants me to treat him like a chair.

And it's a pity, 'cause look, he's really hot.

I really don't get this.

What's not to get?

I don't know, ordering in sex like it's a pizza.

How is that any way to meet somebody?

A quick way, no drama.

You see, all these guys are very close.

What do you think about him?

He's good looking.

- Really? - Yeah, I mean...

Come on, how do you resist a body like that?

Should I ask him to come over?

What, for me?

For us.

I have... I don't know, I don't think so.

Too late, he's gonna be here in 7 minutes.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi.

Hi.

I'm Michael.

Kobi. Nice... nice to meet you.

Come on in, have a seat.

Nice pajamas.

Thanks, they've been in my family for years.

Where are you from?

I'm, uh, from the US. New York City.

Cool, cool.

I never been, I would love to go.

Well, you should.

I will.

It's very expensive right now, but...

I will.

Are you two a couple?

No, no, I'm here on business.

Okay, what do you do?

I'm a journalist. A writer.

He writes for The New York Times,

so you better be good.

Good night.

Oh, fuck...

Fuck.

Michael.

Hey, what's going on?

Hi, Tomer.

I think it's best if I got a hotel.

- What? - I really need to work and...

Why? What happened?

Don't worry, you'll be paid in full.

Why are you going?

- Are you Michael? - Yes.

Michael, wait, please. I got us muffins, come on.

Stay.

You have one more night, why would you...

Also my mom wants you to come to the kibbutz for dinner, she...

She's cooking non-stop since last night,

she'll kill me if you don't come.

Stay.

It's okay, you can go.

See this place over there?

There was my first kiss.

Maya Noodleman.

We were 11.

Yeah... We went behind one of the machines and kissed

until she started to cry,

'cause a bee stung her in the eye.

They used to make honey here,

that's what made the kibbutz so famous.

Oh, sweet,

never been to a honey factory.

Oh no, they stopped making honey here many years ago.

They sold everything to some...

giant global corporation, you know.

They still use the kibbutz logo for sales.

To keep it authentic, you know.

That's a pity.

Yeah, maybe.

Nice to meet you, I'm Malka.

I'm Michael, really nice to meet you.

I'm very sorry I didn't have much time to prepare a lot.

Tomer only told me that you are coming in the last minute.

- This is so wonderful. - Thank you.

Especially this, what's this called again?

It's my mom's top-secret pumpkin tahini.

She won't reveal the recipe to anyone.

I don't blame her, it's really delicious, thank you.

Tomer is also a good cook.

He knows how to make a good Israeli breakfast.

Have you made him one?

Didn't have the time yet.

How long are you going to stay?

I leave tomorrow.

- Already? - Yeah, just here for work.

The idea is to see how much I can discover about a city

in just five days.

And what did you discover about Tel Aviv?

I don't know...

Maybe that it's full of contradictions?

You know, it's chaotic and tense,

but at the same time it's completely laid back.

It's unlike any other place I've visited.

But that maybe because Tomer here was my guide.

I've enjoyed having him around, seeing the city through his eyes.

I'm sure the feeling is mutual.

He never brings anyone back to the kibbutz.

I'm embarrassing you?

I used to be the cool mom, once upon a time.

I was in all his movies,

but now if only he could, he would, poof,

make me disappear.

I wouldn't make you disappear,

but I might hit the mute button sometimes.

Do you have children, Michael?

No, no, I don't.

And you've never wanted any?

Tomer mentioned that you have a partner for many years.

Yes, well, when we were the right age,

it was much less common for gay men to have children,

and now that it's actually a viable option...

I guess we're just too old.

What are you talking about?

Here in the kibbutz there is a couple, two women,

not young at all,

that just had beautiful twins.

Everything is possible now.

You know, if only I could,

I would have a few more like him.

That's the only one thing I...

- Regret. - Regret, yeah.

Not having more children.

You know, I had him on my own,

well, with a little help from the sperm bank,

also not the most traditional thing,

especially here in the kibbutz.

Everybody said, "This is not right,

"a child should grow up with a father,"

but I think it's bullshit.

Father, mother...

The only thing a child needs to grow up is love.

Well, you did a great job with this one,

congratulations.

L'chaim!

But listen, Michael,

it's never too late to have a child.

Any time is the right time.

I'm sure your parents wanted grandchildren,

all parents want grandchildren.

My father certainly didn't, at least not from me.

I mean, when I told him we were even thinking about surrogacy,

he said we were crazy.

That the world had gone mad

for allowing two men to even think about having children.

He will change his mind

once you'll bring him a grandchild, believe me.

I'm not so sure about that.

Why not?

Well, the truth is,

we did try, my husband and I.

Quite recently, in fact.

We...

we found a wonderful surrogate,

she got pregnant almost immediately.

And everything went really, really well.

We were so happy waiting, you remember what that's like.

All the preparations, we...

we turned the guest room into a nursery and...

And then six months ago,

we made it to the delivery room and...

And things went...

Well, not so good.

We lost our baby.

Oh.

My father, he...

He came to the hospital and he didn't say a thing to me.

Didn't hug me or anything,

he just stood there with this look on his face, like:

"See? See, I told you so."

Oh my god,

I'm so sorry, I...

didn't mean to spoil the dinner.

It's not as if I actually knew her,

she was, you know, she was just a newborn.

We never even really had a chance to bond with her,

just the idea of her.

In any case,

we've put it behind us now.

What name did you give her?

We named her Sarah,

after my mother.

I'm really so sorry, I...

certainly hadn't planned on...

I'm sorry.

No, no.

It's I who am sorry.

Very, very sorry.

Home sweet home.

So, did you finish packing?

What the fuck?

I can't in good conscience leave you with a closet

that looks like it's been ransacked by baboons.

But that's how I like it.

No, that's how you think you like it.

Why not just give my way a try?

You may surprise yourself and find out you prefer it.

And if you don't, no need to worry,

I guarantee you the baboons will return.

How am I supposed to find anything?

It's very easy, I'm gonna show you.

Your nice shirts,

all two of them, are right here.

Your t-shirts all folded and arranged by color

are up there.

Your jeans, sweaters,

sweatshirts, sweatpants

are there.

Your shoes are down on the floor,

your sneakers, your flip-flops.

Your underwear is in this drawer

and your socks are here.

But we have a bit of a problem with your socks.

Come here, give me a hand with this,

we have some serious matchmaking to do.

And please, no projecting your crippling fear of relationships

onto these poor, defenseless socks.

Socks, in case you didn't know,

are monogamous.

They're like swans.

Wait...

What are you doing, what...

You're murdering them, don't roll them into a ball like that,

it makes them lose their elasticity.

Here, you...

You just wanna put them right on top of each other,

look, I'll show you with this.

You just lay

one right on top of the other

and then you ever so gently

just bring them together.

Like a perfect square.

You're crazy.

Excuse me, sir,

have you seen my partner?

Looks just like me,

blue with white stars.

Um, no, I haven't seen him.

Well,

looks like we're the only single socks left.

I lost my mate too.

Hey, I got an idea.

Why don't we pair up?

No way!

You want me,

a blue sock with white stars,

to pair up with you, a simple yellow sock?

It will never work.

Well, excuse me, geesh.

Here I thought a young, hip,

blue sock with white stars would be open to experimenting.

Why are you such a slave to social conventions?

- Wait. - What?

This song,

you have to hear this song, wait.

May I ask Monsieur to move to the balcony?

The best breakfast in Tel Aviv is now being served.

Ichs.

What?

I thought you hated onion.

Of course I do, but you love it.

Oh, would you care for some bread I just baked,

I mean, bought?

This looks just like the challah my grandfather used to throw at us

every Friday before Shabbat.

Why did he do that?

Who knows,

but basically instead of slicing the bread

he'd just tear pieces off of it

and throw it at anyone who wanted some.

I always thought of it like some old-fashioned religious custom, you know.

The breaking of the bread.

We didn't do those things in the kibbutz.

I have to ask my father what it meant when I call him,

tell him I was back in Israel.

Alright, alright...

No, no...

What?

Look at this picture.

- What's happening? - It's a pigeon, but look,

look what's going on behind the pigeon...

Are those two people having sex?

- Yes. - Wow.

Look at that, is it real?

You'll tell me when it's online, right?

I mean, the article.

- I will. - 'Cause I really wanna read it.

Okay.

And you know what?

What?

I think you should write another book.

Call it:

"The Nightmare Bar-Mitzvah,"

and then I'll buy the rights and make a great movie,

which, of course, will be better than your book.

Which will be good too, but you know, just not as good as the movie.

And then I'll win an Oscar.

Yeah... And I'll probably share it with you, you know, 'cause...

I'm nice.

Well, I would like that very much.

Oscars or no Oscars.

I think you should try again.

Huh?

I think you should try again, I agree with my mom.

I don't think it's too late for you.

Wow,

I thought you didn't believe in happy endings.

It has nothing to do with happy endings,

I just think you'll be a good father,

that's all.

Well, Tomer,

I really should get going.

But thank you for everything.

You'll be in touch, right?

About the article and...

Of course, of course I will.

Oh...

Hey,

it's okay.

It's okay, Tomer.

Everything is gonna be okay.

Oh my god,

I can't believe I'm crying at the airport, it's so fucking gay.

Go, go, just...

Just go, I'm okay. I'm okay.

Hey, it's me.

I'm on the plane,

it's a little too early to call, so...

If all goes well I'll be home around five this afternoon.

I was thinking maybe we could go to Stone Park for dinner,

we haven't done that in a long time.

Anyhow, I will see you soon.