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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,752 --> 00:00:04,378 NARRATOR: Previously on Friends: 2 00:00:04,546 --> 00:00:06,046 - Excuse me, miss. - It's Phoebe. 3 00:00:06,256 --> 00:00:08,340 - Will that be all? CHANDLER: They're twins. 4 00:00:08,550 --> 00:00:11,051 Phoebe's Phoebe. Ursula's hot. 5 00:00:11,261 --> 00:00:14,972 - It's for Ursula. - Sure, yeah. Okay, it fits. 6 00:00:15,181 --> 00:00:16,932 Marcel, give Rossy the remote. 7 00:00:17,142 --> 00:00:18,684 [SPEAKING IN SPANISH] 8 00:00:19,561 --> 00:00:20,894 How did he do this? 9 00:00:21,104 --> 00:00:23,439 It's this whole stupid Ursula thing. 10 00:00:23,690 --> 00:00:26,859 So he's going out with her. Is it really so terrible? 11 00:00:27,068 --> 00:00:29,319 - You don't know my sister. - Talk to Joey. 12 00:00:29,529 --> 00:00:32,364 - He's falling in love with her. - You won't lose him. 13 00:00:32,574 --> 00:00:36,035 They haven't even slept together yet. That's not serious. 14 00:00:37,412 --> 00:00:40,122 Oh. Um, yeah. 15 00:00:40,290 --> 00:00:41,665 May we help you? 16 00:00:41,916 --> 00:00:42,958 [RACHEL YELLS] 17 00:00:43,126 --> 00:00:44,626 Rachel! Rachel! 18 00:00:44,961 --> 00:00:47,087 I'm okay. I'm okay. 19 00:00:49,007 --> 00:00:50,924 RACHEL: Ow, ow, ow. Ow, ow, ow. 20 00:00:51,092 --> 00:00:53,469 Ow, ow, ow. Ow, ow, ow. 21 00:00:54,387 --> 00:00:57,473 Uh, hi, uh, my friend was taking down our Christmas lights... 22 00:00:57,682 --> 00:01:00,934 ...and she fell off the balcony and may have broken her foot or ankle. 23 00:01:01,144 --> 00:01:03,729 My God, you still have your Christmas lights up? 24 00:01:06,149 --> 00:01:07,900 Fill this out and bring it back. 25 00:01:08,318 --> 00:01:11,612 - Okay. Here you go. - Ow, ow, ow. Ow, ow, ow. 26 00:01:12,739 --> 00:01:14,990 MONICA: Okay. Whew. 27 00:01:15,158 --> 00:01:16,283 All right. 28 00:01:16,618 --> 00:01:17,993 Name... 29 00:01:18,244 --> 00:01:19,495 ...address... 30 00:01:20,371 --> 00:01:22,915 Okay. In case of emergency, call? 31 00:01:23,166 --> 00:01:24,333 You. 32 00:01:24,709 --> 00:01:25,751 Really? 33 00:01:26,377 --> 00:01:27,419 Yeah. 34 00:01:27,921 --> 00:01:29,588 Oh, that is so sweet. 35 00:01:31,716 --> 00:01:33,842 Oh, gosh. I love you. 36 00:01:34,094 --> 00:01:35,594 Okay, insurance? 37 00:01:35,887 --> 00:01:38,806 Oh, yeah, check it. Definitely gonna want some of that. 38 00:01:40,183 --> 00:01:41,475 You don't have insurance? 39 00:01:41,726 --> 00:01:43,310 Why? How much is this gonna cost? 40 00:01:43,561 --> 00:01:46,313 I have no idea, but X-rays alone could be a couple hundred dollars. 41 00:01:46,523 --> 00:01:48,982 - What are we gonna do? - There's not much we can do. 42 00:01:50,068 --> 00:01:53,737 Uh, unless I use yours. 43 00:01:54,656 --> 00:01:56,573 No, no, no, no, no. 44 00:01:56,866 --> 00:01:58,075 Well, now, wait a second. 45 00:01:58,284 --> 00:02:01,495 Who did I just put as my "in case of emergency" person? 46 00:02:01,913 --> 00:02:03,497 That's insurance fraud. 47 00:02:05,208 --> 00:02:08,502 Well, all right, then. Forget it. Might as well just go home. 48 00:02:08,753 --> 00:02:10,045 - Ow, ow, ow, ow! - Okay, okay. 49 00:02:11,589 --> 00:02:15,008 - Okay, come here. I hate this. - Thank you. I love you. 50 00:02:15,885 --> 00:02:20,389 Hi, heh. Um, I'm gonna need a new set of these forms. 51 00:02:20,890 --> 00:02:21,932 Why? 52 00:02:22,142 --> 00:02:23,225 [LAUGHING] 53 00:02:23,393 --> 00:02:25,435 I am really an idiot. 54 00:02:27,105 --> 00:02:29,022 You see, I was filling out my friend's form... 55 00:02:29,232 --> 00:02:31,400 ...and instead of putting her information... 56 00:02:31,651 --> 00:02:32,901 ...I put mine. 57 00:02:33,236 --> 00:02:35,028 You are an idiot. 58 00:02:35,905 --> 00:02:39,199 Yep, that's me. Heh. I am that stupid. 59 00:02:41,244 --> 00:02:44,246 I had a dream last night where I was playing football with my kid. 60 00:02:45,081 --> 00:02:46,331 - That's nice. - That's nice. 61 00:02:46,708 --> 00:02:48,375 No, no. With him. 62 00:02:51,588 --> 00:02:54,715 I'm on this field, and they hike me the baby. 63 00:02:56,426 --> 00:03:00,179 I know I've gotta do something because the Tampa Bay defense is coming right at me. 64 00:03:01,472 --> 00:03:03,599 Tampa Bay's got a terrible team. 65 00:03:04,517 --> 00:03:05,893 Right, but... 66 00:03:07,145 --> 00:03:11,106 ...it is just me and the baby, so I'm thinking they can take us. 67 00:03:12,942 --> 00:03:14,985 And so I, uh, heh... 68 00:03:15,153 --> 00:03:16,737 I just heave it downfield. 69 00:03:16,988 --> 00:03:18,864 What are you, crazy? That's a baby. 70 00:03:19,073 --> 00:03:21,325 He should take the sack? 71 00:03:24,913 --> 00:03:28,332 Anyway, suddenly I'm downfield. 72 00:03:28,583 --> 00:03:32,419 And I realize that I'm the one who's supposed to catch him, right? 73 00:03:32,670 --> 00:03:35,380 Only I know there's no way I'm not gonna get there in time. 74 00:03:35,590 --> 00:03:37,424 So I am running and I'm running... 75 00:03:37,634 --> 00:03:39,301 ...and that is when I woke up. 76 00:03:39,552 --> 00:03:42,930 See, I am so not ready to be a father. 77 00:03:43,139 --> 00:03:45,057 Hey, you're gonna be fine. 78 00:03:45,266 --> 00:03:48,644 You're one of the most caring, responsible men in North America. 79 00:03:50,188 --> 00:03:52,022 You're gonna make a great dad. 80 00:03:52,273 --> 00:03:55,859 Yeah, Ross. You and the baby just need better blocking. 81 00:03:59,155 --> 00:04:03,033 Oh. Have either of you ever been to the Rainbow Room? Is it expensive? 82 00:04:03,284 --> 00:04:04,952 Only if you order stuff. 83 00:04:06,621 --> 00:04:08,580 I'm taking Ursula tonight. It's her birthday. 84 00:04:08,748 --> 00:04:11,833 - Whoa. What about Phoebe's birthday? - When's that? 85 00:04:12,001 --> 00:04:13,585 ROSS: Uh... 86 00:04:14,462 --> 00:04:15,504 ...tonight. 87 00:04:15,672 --> 00:04:19,091 Ugh, man, what are the odds of that happening? 88 00:04:21,261 --> 00:04:22,970 You take your time. 89 00:04:28,476 --> 00:04:29,643 There it is. 90 00:04:33,564 --> 00:04:34,606 So, what are you gonna do? 91 00:04:35,441 --> 00:04:39,319 What can I do? I don't want to screw it up with Ursula. 92 00:04:39,570 --> 00:04:40,612 And your friend Phoebe? 93 00:04:40,863 --> 00:04:44,741 If she's my friend, hopefully she'll understand. Wouldn't you guys? 94 00:04:45,243 --> 00:04:47,077 Man, if you tried that on my birthday... 95 00:04:47,328 --> 00:04:50,580 ...you'd be staring at the business end of a hissy fit. 96 00:04:53,167 --> 00:04:56,211 You add a pinch of saffron, it makes all the difference. 97 00:04:59,382 --> 00:05:01,466 Okay, uh... 98 00:05:01,634 --> 00:05:03,552 - Monica? - Yes? 99 00:05:04,012 --> 00:05:05,762 Yes, she is. 100 00:05:05,930 --> 00:05:08,640 - Hi. This is my friend Rachel. - Hi. 101 00:05:08,850 --> 00:05:10,392 Hi, uh, Rachel, I'm Dr. Mitchell. 102 00:05:10,601 --> 00:05:13,103 And I'm his friend Dr. Rosen. 103 00:05:14,022 --> 00:05:16,023 Aren't you a little cute to be a doctor? 104 00:05:16,232 --> 00:05:17,482 Excuse me? 105 00:05:17,734 --> 00:05:19,609 God, young, young. I meant young, heh. 106 00:05:19,861 --> 00:05:21,069 Young to be a doctor. 107 00:05:21,237 --> 00:05:23,071 - Oh, good, Rach. - Thank you. 108 00:05:23,239 --> 00:05:24,323 Right. 109 00:05:30,121 --> 00:05:33,540 [R.E.M.'S "WHAT'S THE FREQUENCY, KENNETH?" PLAYING ON STEREO] 110 00:05:34,500 --> 00:05:36,752 So he said it was just a sprain, and that was it. 111 00:05:36,961 --> 00:05:39,254 Uh, you left out the stupid part. 112 00:05:39,922 --> 00:05:40,964 It's not stupid. 113 00:05:41,215 --> 00:05:45,552 The very cute doctors asked us out for tomorrow night, and I said yes. 114 00:05:45,803 --> 00:05:49,056 I think it's totally insane. I mean, they work for the hospital. 115 00:05:49,265 --> 00:05:52,184 It's like returning to the scene of the crime. 116 00:05:52,810 --> 00:05:56,813 - I say we blow off the dates. - What? Monica, they are cute. 117 00:05:57,065 --> 00:06:00,692 They are doctors. Cute doctors. Doctors who are cute. 118 00:06:01,152 --> 00:06:03,653 All right, what have we learned so far? 119 00:06:05,156 --> 00:06:06,823 [KNOCK ON DOOR] 120 00:06:07,408 --> 00:06:08,867 [MUSIC STOPS] 121 00:06:12,914 --> 00:06:14,206 ALL: Surprise! 122 00:06:21,881 --> 00:06:24,716 What the hell are you doing? You scared the crap out of me. 123 00:06:26,469 --> 00:06:28,387 - Was that the cake? - Yeah. 124 00:06:28,846 --> 00:06:30,972 I got a lemon shmush. 125 00:06:31,557 --> 00:06:33,683 Come on. She'll be here any minute. 126 00:06:34,268 --> 00:06:35,769 RACHEL: I hope it's okay. 127 00:06:40,108 --> 00:06:41,983 "Happy Birthday, Peehee." 128 00:06:43,986 --> 00:06:46,446 Maybe we can make a B out of one of those roses. 129 00:06:46,656 --> 00:06:49,116 Yeah, we'll just use our special cake tools. 130 00:06:50,034 --> 00:06:51,827 - Hey, what's going on? CHANDLER: Oh, we just... 131 00:06:51,994 --> 00:06:53,495 ALL: Surprise! 132 00:06:53,663 --> 00:06:55,497 Oh, oh, oh! 133 00:06:56,958 --> 00:06:58,750 This is so great. 134 00:06:58,918 --> 00:07:00,001 Oh, my God. 135 00:07:00,169 --> 00:07:02,087 This was not at all scary. 136 00:07:02,547 --> 00:07:04,005 Hi, everybody. Hi, Betty. 137 00:07:04,215 --> 00:07:05,465 Betty, hi. 138 00:07:05,675 --> 00:07:08,969 You found Betty. Oh, my gosh. This is so great. 139 00:07:09,220 --> 00:07:12,597 Everybody I love is in the same room. 140 00:07:12,849 --> 00:07:14,516 Where's Joey? 141 00:07:17,353 --> 00:07:18,770 Did you see Betty? 142 00:07:29,240 --> 00:07:32,993 I tell you, I wouldn't mind having a piece of this sun-dried-tomato business. 143 00:07:33,786 --> 00:07:38,165 Five years ago, if somebody'd said to me, "Here's a tomato that looks like a prune"... 144 00:07:38,374 --> 00:07:40,750 ...I'd have said, "Get out of my office." 145 00:07:44,130 --> 00:07:46,965 Dad, before I was born, did you freak out at all? 146 00:07:47,175 --> 00:07:48,925 I'm not freaking out. I'm just saying... 147 00:07:49,093 --> 00:07:50,927 ...if someone had come to me with the idea... 148 00:07:51,095 --> 00:07:55,682 Dad, Dad, Dad. I'm talking about the whole, uh, baby thing. 149 00:07:55,892 --> 00:07:58,768 Did you, uh, ever get this sort of... 150 00:07:59,020 --> 00:08:03,440 ...panicky, "Oh, my God, I'm gonna be a father" kind of a thing? 151 00:08:03,691 --> 00:08:04,983 No. 152 00:08:05,651 --> 00:08:08,695 Your mother really did the work. I was busy with the business. 153 00:08:08,946 --> 00:08:10,780 I wasn't around that much. 154 00:08:11,032 --> 00:08:12,991 Is that what this is about? 155 00:08:13,201 --> 00:08:14,951 No, no, Dad. I was just wondering. 156 00:08:15,161 --> 00:08:18,622 There's time to make up for that. We can do stuff together. 157 00:08:18,873 --> 00:08:23,251 You always wanted to go to colonial Williamsburg. How about we do that? 158 00:08:23,878 --> 00:08:25,712 Thanks, Dad. Really, heh. 159 00:08:25,963 --> 00:08:28,590 You know, I just, I just... 160 00:08:29,258 --> 00:08:31,551 I just needed to know, um... 161 00:08:31,761 --> 00:08:34,846 ...when did you start to feel like a father? 162 00:08:35,056 --> 00:08:41,186 Oh. Well, I guess it must have been the day after you were born. 163 00:08:41,812 --> 00:08:44,856 We were in the hospital room, your mother was asleep... 164 00:08:45,107 --> 00:08:48,902 ...and they brought you in and gave you to me. 165 00:08:49,111 --> 00:08:51,238 You were this ugly little red thing. 166 00:08:51,405 --> 00:08:52,489 [CHUCKLES] 167 00:08:52,657 --> 00:08:56,952 And all of a sudden, you grabbed my finger with your whole fist... 168 00:08:57,203 --> 00:08:58,745 ...and you squeezed it... 169 00:08:58,996 --> 00:09:00,705 ...so tight. 170 00:09:02,583 --> 00:09:04,459 And that's when I knew. 171 00:09:07,547 --> 00:09:10,465 So you don't want to go to Williamsburg? 172 00:09:13,803 --> 00:09:15,720 We can go to Williamsburg. 173 00:09:17,056 --> 00:09:18,640 Eat your fish. 174 00:09:20,184 --> 00:09:21,560 [SPEAKING IN SPANISH] 175 00:09:21,811 --> 00:09:22,936 [KNOCK ON DOOR] 176 00:09:23,104 --> 00:09:25,230 MONICA: Rachel, the cute doctors are here. 177 00:09:25,481 --> 00:09:26,898 RACHEL: Okay, coming. 178 00:09:27,358 --> 00:09:29,776 Hi, come on in. Hey, Michael, Jeffrey. 179 00:09:29,986 --> 00:09:31,361 - Hi. - Hi. 180 00:09:31,529 --> 00:09:32,654 Uh, here, we brought wine. 181 00:09:32,822 --> 00:09:36,992 Look at this. It's from the cellars of Ernest and Tova Borgnine. 182 00:09:37,285 --> 00:09:39,911 - So how could we resist? - Oh, that's great. 183 00:09:40,079 --> 00:09:42,205 - So, Monica, how's the ankle? - It's, uh... 184 00:09:42,373 --> 00:09:43,873 [RACHEL CLEARS THROAT] 185 00:09:44,709 --> 00:09:46,585 Why don't you tell them? 186 00:09:47,003 --> 00:09:48,753 After all, it is your ankle. 187 00:09:49,297 --> 00:09:52,215 You know, it's feeling a lot better. Thank you. 188 00:09:52,425 --> 00:09:55,093 Listen, why don't you guys sit down, and we'll get you some glasses. 189 00:09:55,261 --> 00:09:57,178 - Okay. - Okay. 190 00:09:57,346 --> 00:10:00,098 - Um... - Stat. 191 00:10:02,727 --> 00:10:06,021 Okay, listen, I'm thinking, why don't we just tell them who we really are? 192 00:10:06,272 --> 00:10:10,150 - I mean, I think it'll be fine. - It will not. We'll get in trouble. 193 00:10:10,359 --> 00:10:12,277 Monica, would you stop being such a wuss? 194 00:10:12,612 --> 00:10:16,323 A wuss? Excuse me for living in the real world. 195 00:10:16,657 --> 00:10:18,950 - So? - So they still seem normal. 196 00:10:19,201 --> 00:10:20,410 That's because they are. 197 00:10:20,578 --> 00:10:23,330 You have to admit, when we go out with women we meet at the hospital... 198 00:10:23,497 --> 00:10:25,665 Would you relax? Take a look around. 199 00:10:26,292 --> 00:10:29,127 There are no pagan altars. 200 00:10:30,212 --> 00:10:33,089 No piles of bones in the corners. 201 00:10:33,299 --> 00:10:35,467 They're fine. Go like this: 202 00:10:39,347 --> 00:10:43,391 I said we are not going to do it, okay? Sometimes you can be such a big baby. 203 00:10:43,601 --> 00:10:45,226 - I am not a baby. - Be serious. 204 00:10:45,436 --> 00:10:47,604 - You get uptight... - You act like a princess. 205 00:10:47,813 --> 00:10:50,231 - You know what? You know what? - What? What? 206 00:10:50,441 --> 00:10:54,361 Every day you are becoming more and more like your mother. 207 00:10:54,570 --> 00:10:57,489 Excuse me. Hello, here we go. 208 00:10:58,991 --> 00:11:01,576 This is a great place. How long have you lived here? 209 00:11:01,786 --> 00:11:04,746 Thanks. I've been here about six years. 210 00:11:04,955 --> 00:11:08,124 And Rachel moved in a few months ago. 211 00:11:09,126 --> 00:11:11,711 See, I was supposed to get married... 212 00:11:11,921 --> 00:11:13,963 ...but, um, I left the guy at the altar. 213 00:11:17,593 --> 00:11:19,219 - Really? - Yeah. 214 00:11:19,470 --> 00:11:22,180 Yeah, I know it's pretty selfish, but, heh... 215 00:11:22,431 --> 00:11:24,808 ...hey, that's me. 216 00:11:29,146 --> 00:11:30,855 - Why don't you try the hummus? RACHEL: Ahem. 217 00:11:31,107 --> 00:11:32,399 So, Monica, what do you do? 218 00:11:32,566 --> 00:11:35,902 Uh, I am a, uh, chef at a restaurant uptown. 219 00:11:36,112 --> 00:11:38,571 - Oh, good for you. - Yeah, it is. 220 00:11:39,907 --> 00:11:44,828 Mostly because I get to boss people around, which I just love to do. 221 00:11:47,289 --> 00:11:48,957 Well, this hummus is great. 222 00:11:49,166 --> 00:11:50,875 God bless the chickpea. 223 00:11:53,295 --> 00:11:55,088 [LAUGHING] 224 00:11:55,756 --> 00:11:56,965 Oh, God. 225 00:11:57,174 --> 00:11:59,634 I am so spoiled. 226 00:12:03,889 --> 00:12:04,931 That's it. 227 00:12:06,600 --> 00:12:09,227 And by the way, have I mentioned that back in high school... 228 00:12:09,437 --> 00:12:10,812 ...I was a cow? 229 00:12:13,149 --> 00:12:15,275 I used to wet my bed. 230 00:12:16,152 --> 00:12:18,987 I use my breasts to get other people's attention. 231 00:12:19,321 --> 00:12:21,114 We both do that. 232 00:12:27,913 --> 00:12:30,415 [PHONE RINGING] 233 00:12:35,463 --> 00:12:38,214 Monica and Rachel's apartment. 234 00:12:38,382 --> 00:12:42,427 Uh... Uh, yeah, just one second. Uh, Rachel, it's your dad. 235 00:12:45,389 --> 00:12:46,639 Hi, Dad. 236 00:12:46,849 --> 00:12:48,850 No, no. It's me. 237 00:12:49,894 --> 00:12:52,604 Listen, Dad, I can't talk right now. Um... 238 00:12:52,813 --> 00:12:54,898 But there's something, um... 239 00:12:55,107 --> 00:12:57,942 There's something that I've been meaning to tell you. 240 00:12:58,444 --> 00:12:59,486 Excuse me. 241 00:12:59,904 --> 00:13:01,946 Remember back in freshman year? 242 00:13:02,156 --> 00:13:05,116 Well, Billy Dreskin and I had sex on your bed. 243 00:13:15,419 --> 00:13:16,503 Daddy... 244 00:13:17,588 --> 00:13:20,465 Daddy... Daddy, why? Why would I sleep with Billy Dreskin? 245 00:13:20,716 --> 00:13:22,967 His father tried to put you out of business. 246 00:13:23,219 --> 00:13:24,677 You are dead. 247 00:13:28,808 --> 00:13:31,100 Ross, he's got the remote again. 248 00:13:31,352 --> 00:13:32,519 Good. 249 00:13:33,521 --> 00:13:35,063 Maybe he can switch it back. 250 00:13:35,356 --> 00:13:37,899 [SPEAKING IN SPANISH] 251 00:13:39,068 --> 00:13:40,276 Maybe not. 252 00:13:42,112 --> 00:13:43,196 Hello? 253 00:13:45,199 --> 00:13:46,699 Uh, ueah... Uh... 254 00:13:47,701 --> 00:13:51,120 Okay, uh, hold on a second and let me just check and see if she's here. 255 00:13:51,330 --> 00:13:55,250 It's the woman from the hospital. There's a problem with the form. 256 00:13:55,459 --> 00:13:57,168 Oh, God, what do we do? 257 00:13:57,419 --> 00:13:59,212 I don't know. Just find out what they want. 258 00:13:59,463 --> 00:14:01,297 Okay. No, you do it. 259 00:14:02,007 --> 00:14:04,217 Hello. This is Monica. 260 00:14:04,635 --> 00:14:05,760 Yeah? 261 00:14:06,595 --> 00:14:08,179 Oh. Okay. 262 00:14:08,430 --> 00:14:10,723 Yes, we'll be right down. Thank you. 263 00:14:11,892 --> 00:14:14,644 We forgot to sign one of the admissions forms. 264 00:14:15,312 --> 00:14:18,106 - Okay, you're right, this wasn't worth it. - Thank you. 265 00:14:18,399 --> 00:14:20,066 - Okay, let me just change. - Yes. 266 00:14:23,195 --> 00:14:25,238 - Hey. - Hey. 267 00:14:26,156 --> 00:14:27,240 Trouble? 268 00:14:28,492 --> 00:14:30,618 Your sister stood me up the other night. 269 00:14:30,828 --> 00:14:34,455 Oh, no. Don't you hate it when people aren't there for you? 270 00:14:36,417 --> 00:14:39,377 - Did you try calling her? - I've been trying for two days. 271 00:14:39,628 --> 00:14:42,380 When I called the restaurant, they said she was too busy to talk. 272 00:14:42,631 --> 00:14:45,300 I can't believe she's blowing me off. 273 00:15:04,737 --> 00:15:05,778 Hey. 274 00:15:06,947 --> 00:15:08,323 Oh. 275 00:15:09,742 --> 00:15:11,409 Um, you got a minute? 276 00:15:11,660 --> 00:15:14,495 Um, yeah, I'm just working. 277 00:15:22,796 --> 00:15:24,631 - So... - Uh-huh? 278 00:15:26,342 --> 00:15:28,551 Um, oh, I got you a birthday present. 279 00:15:28,886 --> 00:15:30,345 Oh, wow, you remembered. 280 00:15:35,059 --> 00:15:38,311 Oh. It's a Judy Jetson Thermos. 281 00:15:38,520 --> 00:15:39,812 Right. Like the kind you... 282 00:15:40,022 --> 00:15:41,189 Right. 283 00:15:41,857 --> 00:15:44,025 Oh, I got something for you too. 284 00:15:44,234 --> 00:15:45,443 How'd you know I was coming? 285 00:15:45,611 --> 00:15:48,780 Um, yeah, um, "twin" thing. 286 00:15:51,283 --> 00:15:53,368 I can't believe you did this. 287 00:15:53,577 --> 00:15:55,370 I can't believe you... 288 00:15:55,621 --> 00:15:57,246 ...did this. 289 00:16:01,460 --> 00:16:03,670 So, what's the deal with, um, you and Joey? 290 00:16:04,505 --> 00:16:05,838 Oh, right. 291 00:16:06,048 --> 00:16:08,841 He is so great. But that's over. 292 00:16:09,802 --> 00:16:11,594 - Does he know? - Who? 293 00:16:12,471 --> 00:16:17,100 Joey. You know, um, ahem, he's really nutsy about you. 294 00:16:17,559 --> 00:16:19,060 He is? Why? 295 00:16:19,353 --> 00:16:21,229 - You got me. - Right. 296 00:16:21,480 --> 00:16:22,522 Excuse me... 297 00:16:22,773 --> 00:16:25,400 ...doesn't this come with a side salad? 298 00:16:27,027 --> 00:16:28,861 So, um, are you gonna call him? 299 00:16:29,071 --> 00:16:31,948 - What, you think he likes me? - No. Joey. 300 00:16:32,324 --> 00:16:37,078 Oh. No, no. He is so smart. He'll figure it out. 301 00:16:37,329 --> 00:16:38,955 Do you want some chicken? 302 00:16:39,748 --> 00:16:42,083 No, no. No food with a face, remember? 303 00:16:43,002 --> 00:16:45,128 You have not changed. 304 00:16:45,462 --> 00:16:46,879 Yeah, you too. 305 00:16:50,384 --> 00:16:53,094 - Hi. Remember us? - Mm-hm. 306 00:16:53,762 --> 00:16:57,557 Um, yeah, you just called about needing a signature on the admissions form? 307 00:16:57,808 --> 00:17:00,268 Well, it turns out we need a whole new one. 308 00:17:00,519 --> 00:17:02,562 Because, um, you see... 309 00:17:03,105 --> 00:17:05,231 ...I put the wrong name again. 310 00:17:05,941 --> 00:17:08,776 - Because, um... - You're that stupid. 311 00:17:10,029 --> 00:17:12,739 I am. I'm that stupid. 312 00:17:13,323 --> 00:17:15,825 Yeah, and I'm just gonna pay for this with a check. 313 00:17:16,243 --> 00:17:18,077 You know, your insurance will cover that. 314 00:17:18,287 --> 00:17:20,872 Yeah, I know. I'm just not that bright either. 315 00:17:23,125 --> 00:17:24,584 Okay, worst case scenario: 316 00:17:24,918 --> 00:17:28,212 - Say you never feel like a father. - Uh-huh. 317 00:17:28,380 --> 00:17:32,341 Say your son never feels connected to you as one. 318 00:17:32,843 --> 00:17:36,471 Say all of his relationships are affected by this. 319 00:17:36,680 --> 00:17:38,389 Do you have a point? 320 00:17:39,600 --> 00:17:41,517 You know, you'd think I would. 321 00:17:42,519 --> 00:17:44,437 [MARCEL GASPING] 322 00:17:44,646 --> 00:17:46,522 What's up with the simian? 323 00:17:47,608 --> 00:17:49,650 It's just a fur ball. 324 00:17:51,612 --> 00:17:53,154 Okay, whose turn is it? 325 00:17:53,363 --> 00:17:55,323 Yours. I just got 43 points for "kidney." 326 00:17:55,741 --> 00:17:59,077 No, you got zero points for "idney." 327 00:17:59,286 --> 00:18:01,621 I had a K. Where's my K? 328 00:18:01,789 --> 00:18:03,456 [GASPING] 329 00:18:08,712 --> 00:18:11,631 You've got to help me. My monkey swallowed a K. 330 00:18:11,840 --> 00:18:13,341 Get that animal out of here. 331 00:18:13,550 --> 00:18:17,011 The animal hospital is way across town. He's choking. I don't know what to do. 332 00:18:17,221 --> 00:18:19,889 - What's going on? - Marcel swallowed a Scrabble tile. 333 00:18:22,017 --> 00:18:25,645 Excuse me. This hospital is for people. 334 00:18:25,854 --> 00:18:28,231 Lady, he is people. He has a name, okay? 335 00:18:28,440 --> 00:18:30,066 He watches Jeopardy... 336 00:18:30,275 --> 00:18:33,027 ...he touches himself when nobody's watching. 337 00:18:34,113 --> 00:18:35,613 Please, have a heart. 338 00:18:35,823 --> 00:18:38,074 - I'll take a look at him. - Oh, thank you. 339 00:18:38,325 --> 00:18:39,367 - Michael. - Rachel. 340 00:18:39,576 --> 00:18:40,618 - What? - Monica. 341 00:18:40,786 --> 00:18:42,620 - Oh. - Hi. 342 00:18:55,008 --> 00:18:56,175 Hey. 343 00:18:57,094 --> 00:18:58,261 Urs. 344 00:18:58,637 --> 00:19:00,763 What are you doing here? I've been trying to call you. 345 00:19:01,932 --> 00:19:02,974 Listen, um... 346 00:19:03,142 --> 00:19:07,019 Don't say "listen." I know that "listen." I've said that "listen." 347 00:19:08,272 --> 00:19:09,313 I'm sorry. 348 00:19:10,357 --> 00:19:12,358 I don't get it. What happened? 349 00:19:12,609 --> 00:19:15,027 What about everything you said under the bridge? 350 00:19:15,988 --> 00:19:18,322 Yeah, um, ahem... 351 00:19:19,116 --> 00:19:21,742 You know, just forget about what I said under the bridge. 352 00:19:21,952 --> 00:19:25,163 I was talking crazy that night. I was so drunk. 353 00:19:26,832 --> 00:19:27,874 You don't drink. 354 00:19:28,667 --> 00:19:30,585 That's right, I don't. 355 00:19:31,170 --> 00:19:33,087 But I was drunk on you. 356 00:19:34,256 --> 00:19:37,049 - Oh, Urs. - But, yeah, so it's not gonna work. 357 00:19:37,759 --> 00:19:40,428 Why? Is it because I'm friends with Phoebe? 358 00:19:41,680 --> 00:19:44,473 If it was, would you stop hanging out with her? 359 00:19:46,643 --> 00:19:47,685 No. 360 00:19:47,895 --> 00:19:49,645 No, I couldn't do that. 361 00:19:50,397 --> 00:19:53,107 Um, then, yeah, it's because of Phoebe. 362 00:19:54,526 --> 00:19:57,278 So you know, it's either her or me. 363 00:19:58,739 --> 00:20:01,866 Then, uh... Then I'm sorry. 364 00:20:06,496 --> 00:20:08,080 You know... 365 00:20:08,248 --> 00:20:10,625 ...you're gonna be really, really hard to get over. 366 00:20:11,460 --> 00:20:12,501 I know. 367 00:20:18,717 --> 00:20:23,137 I don't know whether it's just because we're breaking up or what... 368 00:20:23,388 --> 00:20:25,389 ...but you have never looked so beautiful. 369 00:20:26,058 --> 00:20:27,099 Really? 370 00:20:57,965 --> 00:20:59,423 - Pheebs? - Yeah. 371 00:21:10,102 --> 00:21:11,394 He looks so tiny. 372 00:21:13,063 --> 00:21:14,814 - We just got the message. - Is he all right? 373 00:21:15,023 --> 00:21:17,358 Yeah, the doctor got the K out. 374 00:21:17,985 --> 00:21:20,319 He also found an M and an O. 375 00:21:22,239 --> 00:21:25,074 We think he was trying to spell out "monkey." 376 00:21:31,415 --> 00:21:34,875 The doctor says he'll be fine. He's just sleeping now. 377 00:21:36,545 --> 00:21:38,337 So you feel like a dad yet? 378 00:21:38,588 --> 00:21:40,339 No. Why? 379 00:21:40,716 --> 00:21:44,343 Hey, come on, you came through. You did what you had to do. 380 00:21:44,553 --> 00:21:46,053 That is very dad. 381 00:21:46,221 --> 00:21:47,763 Oh, look, he's waking up. 382 00:21:48,098 --> 00:21:50,558 ROSS: Hey, fella. How you doing? 383 00:22:10,037 --> 00:22:14,874 [DUBBED IN SPANISH] 384 00:22:19,713 --> 00:22:21,672 ALL: Ooh. 28198

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