Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:01:48,927 --> 00:01:51,452
The colossal Kevin O'Shea
goes back to pass.
2
00:01:51,629 --> 00:01:53,927
Sees his little brother Danny downfield.
3
00:01:54,099 --> 00:01:57,933
The rush is on. The ball is in the air.
The crowd is going wild.
4
00:01:58,103 --> 00:02:02,096
Danny catches the ball.
He's at the 10, the 20, the 25.
5
00:02:02,273 --> 00:02:04,468
It looks like he could go all the way.
6
00:02:04,642 --> 00:02:07,634
The O'Shea brothers
are about to win the championship.
7
00:02:07,812 --> 00:02:12,010
Oh, there's a fumble.
Danny got it. Hey, Kevin, wait up.
8
00:02:12,183 --> 00:02:16,847
How many touchdowns you gonna throw me?
I'll bet it's at least 50, maybe 100.
9
00:02:17,022 --> 00:02:20,423
- What time was Mom gonna pick you up?
- She's not picking me up.
10
00:02:20,592 --> 00:02:23,959
She said I could spend
the day with you. Isn't that great?
11
00:02:24,129 --> 00:02:26,154
Yeah. Great.
12
00:02:36,174 --> 00:02:38,108
- Okay, spaces or laces?
- Spaces!
13
00:02:38,276 --> 00:02:41,473
- Come on!
- Go!
14
00:02:42,047 --> 00:02:43,480
- Come on!
- Spaces!
15
00:02:46,551 --> 00:02:49,019
- Laces.
- Laces, daddy-o.
16
00:02:50,355 --> 00:02:53,950
- I'll take Butz.
- Yes. It's over.
17
00:02:54,692 --> 00:02:56,353
- Stein and Rip.
- Yes.
18
00:02:56,528 --> 00:02:58,553
- Pinski.
- Yes.
19
00:02:58,730 --> 00:03:00,197
- McCormick.
- Yeah.
20
00:03:00,365 --> 00:03:01,957
- Ralphy.
- Yes.
21
00:03:02,133 --> 00:03:04,101
- Mouse.
- Yes.
22
00:03:04,269 --> 00:03:06,362
- Moritti.
- Yeah.
23
00:03:06,538 --> 00:03:09,029
All right. Let's play some football.
24
00:03:09,340 --> 00:03:11,467
Hey, Danny, the ball. Give me.
25
00:03:12,343 --> 00:03:15,676
I must be pretty bad
if my own brother won't even pick me.
26
00:03:15,847 --> 00:03:19,146
- Danny, look at it my way.
- I stink and you know it.
27
00:03:19,317 --> 00:03:22,343
You're perfect, and I stink.
That's it. The end.
28
00:03:22,520 --> 00:03:23,748
No, that's not it.
29
00:03:23,922 --> 00:03:27,016
It's just that I'm so good
it makes you look really bad.
30
00:03:27,192 --> 00:03:29,558
- Are you trying to cheer me up?
- Yeah.
31
00:03:30,161 --> 00:03:32,925
- It's not working.
- See, I stink at something too.
32
00:03:33,098 --> 00:03:36,590
Give me the ball.
I'll score a couple touchdowns for you.
33
00:03:39,137 --> 00:03:41,765
We kick off. Stand back, baby.
34
00:03:44,542 --> 00:03:46,339
Hi, Danny.
35
00:03:47,412 --> 00:03:48,640
Hi, Patty.
36
00:03:48,813 --> 00:03:53,011
- Aren't you playing today?
- No, I'm on the injured list.
37
00:03:55,920 --> 00:03:57,717
Hey, Danny...
38
00:03:58,423 --> 00:03:59,720
...see that water tower?
39
00:03:59,991 --> 00:04:03,119
One day our name's
gonna be up there in big letters.
40
00:04:03,294 --> 00:04:04,727
The O'Shea brothers.
41
00:04:04,896 --> 00:04:08,127
We're gonna own this town.
You and me, buddy.
42
00:04:30,889 --> 00:04:34,154
Dig. Dig. Dig. Dig. Come on, people.
Show me something.
43
00:04:34,325 --> 00:04:36,156
Move it! Move it!
44
00:04:36,327 --> 00:04:40,263
Are you kidding, people? It's called sweat.
Show me some. Move. Move.
45
00:04:41,666 --> 00:04:44,396
Come on, gentlemen. Suck it up.
Suck it up!
46
00:04:44,569 --> 00:04:46,503
- Faster.
- Looking good, coach.
47
00:04:49,274 --> 00:04:51,538
- Oh, baby, now we're talking.
- Yeah.
48
00:04:51,709 --> 00:04:56,237
All right. Everybody, back up. Back up.
Give him room. Give him some air.
49
00:04:57,415 --> 00:04:59,110
Nice pop, Icebox.
50
00:05:00,151 --> 00:05:01,641
Thanks, Uncle Kev.
51
00:05:01,819 --> 00:05:03,684
- Is he dead?
- Well, he ain't moving.
52
00:05:03,955 --> 00:05:08,722
- You killed him, Icebox.
- Hey, Rudy, you okay?
53
00:05:10,595 --> 00:05:12,290
Oh, Rudy.
54
00:05:14,966 --> 00:05:18,595
Peanut butter and jelly sandwich?
Are you nuts?
55
00:05:19,771 --> 00:05:20,829
It's still good.
56
00:05:21,005 --> 00:05:23,997
You'll never get anywhere treating
your helmet like a lunch box.
57
00:05:24,175 --> 00:05:26,143
- What is that?
- Cheetos.
58
00:05:26,311 --> 00:05:28,643
- Crunchy or puffed?
- Puffed.
59
00:05:28,813 --> 00:05:29,802
Wimp.
60
00:05:29,981 --> 00:05:32,176
Everyone from here over,
go with Coach Butz.
61
00:05:32,650 --> 00:05:34,880
Everyone from here over, come with me.
62
00:05:35,153 --> 00:05:37,815
- Come on!
- Let's find out who's gonna make this team.
63
00:05:37,989 --> 00:05:40,617
- My mom made that!
- Move it.
64
00:05:40,792 --> 00:05:42,453
Set. Go.
65
00:05:45,830 --> 00:05:47,354
Set. Go.
66
00:05:51,469 --> 00:05:52,629
Go.
67
00:05:54,772 --> 00:05:57,536
- Oh, man.
- Next time.
68
00:05:57,709 --> 00:06:02,203
- Fifth one he's booted.
- Hands like frying pans. Set. Go.
69
00:06:04,816 --> 00:06:07,080
Why are you doing this to me, fellas?
70
00:06:07,252 --> 00:06:11,313
I cut your nails, wash you,
put gloves on you when you're cold.
71
00:06:11,489 --> 00:06:14,652
Hey, Hanon, you ever
catch anything? Ever?
72
00:06:14,826 --> 00:06:17,852
Caught a cold yesterday, Murph.
Here, have some.
73
00:06:18,029 --> 00:06:21,328
Gross. Gross. Get off of me, you little dork.
74
00:06:21,799 --> 00:06:23,232
Speed:
75
00:06:23,568 --> 00:06:27,698
The distance gained
divided by the time of travel.
76
00:06:27,872 --> 00:06:30,932
You clowns want to play football,
you gotta move.
77
00:06:31,109 --> 00:06:32,576
Ready.
78
00:06:37,749 --> 00:06:40,582
Come on, Tad. Go, Tad. Come on. Dig.
79
00:06:42,920 --> 00:06:45,912
What is this, a telethon? Ready.
80
00:06:57,068 --> 00:06:58,228
Next.
81
00:07:02,774 --> 00:07:05,902
Eight point five. Excellent, Briggs.
82
00:07:06,844 --> 00:07:09,745
- How did I do?
- I don't know. I don't have a sundial.
83
00:07:09,914 --> 00:07:11,404
Back in line.
84
00:07:11,582 --> 00:07:14,073
Hey, Icebox...
85
00:07:14,252 --> 00:07:17,653
...you look like a boy
and play like a boy.
86
00:07:17,822 --> 00:07:19,187
Do you pee standing up?
87
00:07:19,357 --> 00:07:22,224
No, when she's hot to trot
she's still gotta squat.
88
00:07:22,827 --> 00:07:27,560
- Get off. I can't breathe!
- That's the whole point.
89
00:07:29,334 --> 00:07:31,666
- Becky, let him go.
- I can't breathe.
90
00:07:31,836 --> 00:07:34,270
- Get away. Come on. Get off!
- Let him go.
91
00:07:34,439 --> 00:07:36,634
- Let me go.
- Please, stop.
92
00:07:37,942 --> 00:07:39,807
You're lucky my dad showed up.
93
00:07:44,148 --> 00:07:46,082
- Hi, Danny.
- Hi.
94
00:07:46,250 --> 00:07:48,343
- Hey, guys.
- Hi, Dan.
95
00:07:48,519 --> 00:07:52,615
Hey, guess what, Uncle Dan?
I got the whole headlock thing on tape.
96
00:07:52,790 --> 00:07:55,918
- Here, wanna see?
- No, that's okay. Thanks.
97
00:07:56,094 --> 00:07:59,154
- How's she doing?
- She's the best one out there.
98
00:08:06,504 --> 00:08:08,233
You know...
99
00:08:09,574 --> 00:08:13,169
...today I'm reminded
of what a lucky guy I am.
100
00:08:14,679 --> 00:08:17,341
Lucky to have been born an O'Shea.
101
00:08:19,617 --> 00:08:22,177
Lucky to have been born in this great town.
102
00:08:22,353 --> 00:08:24,878
Lucky to have been blessed
with abilities...
103
00:08:25,056 --> 00:08:29,186
...that allowed me to bring
something back here to Urbania...
104
00:08:29,360 --> 00:08:30,725
...my town.
105
00:08:30,895 --> 00:08:33,295
- Things like:
- Three high school championships.
106
00:08:33,464 --> 00:08:36,695
- Three high school championships.
- A collegiate championship.
107
00:08:36,868 --> 00:08:39,666
- A collegiate title.
- An all-American title.
108
00:08:39,837 --> 00:08:44,570
- An all-American title. And not to mention...
- And not to mention a Heisman Trophy.
109
00:08:45,009 --> 00:08:46,408
...a Heisman Trophy.
110
00:08:52,850 --> 00:08:54,317
Today, I'm even more lucky...
111
00:08:54,485 --> 00:08:58,319
...because there's one more thing
I can bring back to this town:
112
00:08:58,823 --> 00:09:00,984
A Peewee State Championship.
113
00:09:01,159 --> 00:09:02,592
Yeah!
114
00:09:11,002 --> 00:09:12,492
All right. All right.
115
00:09:15,440 --> 00:09:18,000
Now, when you hear your name called...
116
00:09:18,176 --> 00:09:20,610
...I want you to go over to Coach Butz...
117
00:09:20,778 --> 00:09:22,177
...and pick up your jersey.
118
00:09:22,480 --> 00:09:26,280
- Those jerseys are so cool.
- Dibs on Montana's number.
119
00:09:26,451 --> 00:09:29,420
I'm getting Michael Irvin's number,
the big 8-8.
120
00:09:29,587 --> 00:09:31,555
I just want one of those shirts.
121
00:09:32,290 --> 00:09:34,884
- Briggs.
- Yeah!
122
00:09:35,693 --> 00:09:37,661
- Patterson.
- Yes!
123
00:09:37,829 --> 00:09:39,490
- Hoffs.
- Yeah.
124
00:09:39,664 --> 00:09:42,428
- Lewis.
- Yeah.
125
00:09:42,600 --> 00:09:44,033
Bookman.
126
00:09:45,470 --> 00:09:48,132
- Grabelski.
- Grabelski!
127
00:09:48,306 --> 00:09:50,740
- Rivera.
- Rivera!
128
00:09:50,942 --> 00:09:54,503
- Scanlon.
- Scanlon, my man.
129
00:09:54,679 --> 00:09:57,239
- Parkhurst.
- Yes.
130
00:09:59,050 --> 00:10:01,814
- Walker.
- Yeah.
131
00:10:01,986 --> 00:10:04,819
- Lindemann.
- Yeah.
132
00:10:05,223 --> 00:10:06,952
- Beauregard.
- Yeah.
133
00:10:07,124 --> 00:10:08,785
Gibbs.
134
00:10:10,161 --> 00:10:12,959
- Grieson.
- Yes!
135
00:10:15,032 --> 00:10:16,659
And last but not least...
136
00:10:17,535 --> 00:10:20,231
...the backbone of this team...
137
00:10:21,739 --> 00:10:25,004
...Shawn Murphy.
- Yes! I knew it, Becky!
138
00:10:25,176 --> 00:10:28,805
Yes, thank you! I knew it!
139
00:10:35,553 --> 00:10:36,986
Now...
140
00:10:37,321 --> 00:10:38,788
...for the rest of you...
141
00:10:40,391 --> 00:10:42,416
...l'd like to say...
142
00:10:42,793 --> 00:10:44,454
Well, I just...
143
00:10:44,629 --> 00:10:47,655
I'd like to thank you for trying out.
144
00:10:47,832 --> 00:10:52,826
And I want you to remember,
hey, there's always next year.
145
00:10:55,540 --> 00:10:58,168
All right. Go.
146
00:11:12,590 --> 00:11:14,057
Okay.
147
00:11:15,860 --> 00:11:19,455
Well, I think this really sucks.
148
00:11:20,731 --> 00:11:23,962
I guess there's nothing we can learn
from this. Is there?
149
00:11:24,135 --> 00:11:26,933
Never try out for anything again.
150
00:11:45,957 --> 00:11:47,857
- Take her easy, coach.
- Hey, Ross.
151
00:11:48,159 --> 00:11:49,683
Kevin.
152
00:11:49,860 --> 00:11:53,728
- What the hell are you doing?
- I'm putting together a championship team.
153
00:11:53,898 --> 00:11:55,832
Did you see the faces of
the other kids?
154
00:11:56,000 --> 00:11:59,299
Football isn't about faces.
It's about speed, about talent.
155
00:11:59,470 --> 00:12:02,496
I picked the best.
Besides, I only got three weeks.
156
00:12:02,673 --> 00:12:05,369
- I can't waste my time with...
- Losers.
157
00:12:05,776 --> 00:12:08,609
- Butz.
- Who the hell are you, Vince Lombardi?
158
00:12:09,080 --> 00:12:10,672
This is peewee football.
159
00:12:10,848 --> 00:12:14,545
- Every kid should have a chance to play.
- Not on this team.
160
00:12:15,620 --> 00:12:18,214
What about Becky?
She's better than those boys.
161
00:12:18,389 --> 00:12:21,085
I hate to break it to you,
but Icebox is a girl.
162
00:12:21,258 --> 00:12:23,749
If you treat her like a girl,
she'll act like one.
163
00:12:23,928 --> 00:12:28,262
- Don't tell me how to raise my daughter.
- Don't tell me how to pick my squad.
164
00:12:28,799 --> 00:12:31,131
Way to go, Kevin.
You hurt their feelings.
165
00:12:31,302 --> 00:12:33,736
- Danny...
- You hurt their feelings.
166
00:12:33,904 --> 00:12:36,338
You and I both know
those kids can't cut it.
167
00:12:36,507 --> 00:12:39,840
What am I supposed to do, lie to them?
Build up their hopes?
168
00:12:40,011 --> 00:12:42,445
Trust me. It's better this way.
169
00:12:42,913 --> 00:12:45,541
You'll thank me tomorrow.
170
00:12:47,051 --> 00:12:49,815
I knew you'd see it my way.
171
00:13:10,408 --> 00:13:13,571
God bless family, friends...
172
00:13:13,744 --> 00:13:18,010
...flowers, Nickelodeon,
all the little kitties...
173
00:13:18,215 --> 00:13:23,676
...PEZ, Mr. Lorenzo, the school janitor...
His ears are so hairy.
174
00:13:23,854 --> 00:13:29,258
- He's an unfortunate man, Priscilla.
- God bless Daddy's favorite sport, football.
175
00:13:29,427 --> 00:13:30,416
- Amen.
- Amen, baby.
176
00:13:30,594 --> 00:13:32,585
- Amen.
- Dig in.
177
00:13:32,863 --> 00:13:35,923
I still don't understand
why you didn't pick Becky.
178
00:13:36,100 --> 00:13:38,796
- Yes, you do, Karen.
- It's not good enough, Kevin.
179
00:13:38,969 --> 00:13:42,928
She's your niece, and she's one
of the best players out there.
180
00:13:43,107 --> 00:13:46,804
- Yeah, and she can make boys cry.
- Honey, she's a girl.
181
00:13:46,977 --> 00:13:49,241
And girls can run countries...
182
00:13:49,413 --> 00:13:52,849
...they can sit on the Supreme Court,
they can discover radium...
183
00:13:53,250 --> 00:13:55,343
...but they can't play peewee football.
184
00:13:55,519 --> 00:13:57,646
- Correct.
- Oh, Kevin.
185
00:13:57,822 --> 00:14:01,656
All right. Maybe I went a little too far.
Maybe I've been a little...
186
00:14:01,826 --> 00:14:05,694
- Pigheaded? Chauvinistic, maybe.
- All right. You proved your point.
187
00:14:05,863 --> 00:14:08,457
I think Becky should be
involved with the team.
188
00:14:08,799 --> 00:14:10,494
- Really?
- Yeah, or any girl.
189
00:14:10,668 --> 00:14:13,637
Debbie, get your friends.
I need girls with spirit.
190
00:14:13,804 --> 00:14:17,296
- I need pom-poms. I need cheerleaders!
- Yes!
191
00:14:21,712 --> 00:14:24,510
I hate not being picked.
192
00:14:26,684 --> 00:14:28,015
Hey, I got an idea.
193
00:14:28,185 --> 00:14:31,052
Why don't we go put some
mud tires on the go-cart?
194
00:14:31,222 --> 00:14:34,453
- I don't want to.
- All right. Forget the tires.
195
00:14:34,625 --> 00:14:38,561
How about if we go camping
in the woods, huh? Make moose sounds?
196
00:14:39,830 --> 00:14:41,855
Forget the moose sounds.
197
00:14:42,032 --> 00:14:44,000
Listen, Beck...
198
00:14:44,568 --> 00:14:49,096
...remember when Mom said that she was
gonna have to do what was best for her?
199
00:14:50,141 --> 00:14:54,669
Well, when she chose to leave us
she was kind of making a choice for us too.
200
00:14:54,845 --> 00:14:59,373
I mean, in a way, it gave us a chance
to get real close, you and me. Right?
201
00:15:00,785 --> 00:15:04,050
When Uncle Kevin didn't pick you
it was the same thing...
202
00:15:04,221 --> 00:15:07,213
...because, in a way, he freed
you up for something else.
203
00:15:07,558 --> 00:15:10,891
Or to do something different
where you could do the picking.
204
00:15:11,061 --> 00:15:12,551
Dad...
205
00:15:12,730 --> 00:15:14,630
...I just wanna play football.
206
00:15:16,000 --> 00:15:19,697
Hey, sweetie, if I had a football team,
I'd pick you.
207
00:15:31,849 --> 00:15:34,613
We never get picked for anything.
208
00:15:34,885 --> 00:15:38,651
- Life stinks.
- Yeah, there goes my shot at the pros.
209
00:15:38,823 --> 00:15:40,757
I'm gonna have to be a senator.
210
00:15:40,925 --> 00:15:44,292
Here's a kiss for Murphy
and one for Patterson and Briggs.
211
00:15:53,437 --> 00:15:57,134
Zol-fart, what kind of road kill
did your mom feed you last night?
212
00:15:57,308 --> 00:16:00,971
- Free-range skunk.
- This is a private establishment, gentlemen.
213
00:16:01,545 --> 00:16:03,308
Yeah, scram.
214
00:16:04,582 --> 00:16:08,882
- Please?
- I'm hurt. I'm really hurt.
215
00:16:09,053 --> 00:16:13,251
Yeah, we just came by to tell you guys
how incredibly sorry we are...
216
00:16:13,424 --> 00:16:15,449
...that you didn't make the team.
217
00:16:15,626 --> 00:16:17,025
Not!
218
00:16:24,468 --> 00:16:26,333
The Icebox!
219
00:16:29,106 --> 00:16:31,506
- Let's get out of here.
- Go!
220
00:17:33,637 --> 00:17:35,832
Sure. Big shot on the go-cart.
221
00:17:36,473 --> 00:17:38,805
I'd give anything
to get you on the field.
222
00:17:38,976 --> 00:17:42,343
- Don't worry, Murph. You'll get your chance.
- Yeah, sure.
223
00:17:42,513 --> 00:17:45,277
You and your spaz patrol
didn't make the team.
224
00:17:45,449 --> 00:17:47,781
Well, I got a little news flash for you.
225
00:17:47,952 --> 00:17:52,412
We started our own team,
and we're gonna kick your Cowboy butts.
226
00:17:52,589 --> 00:17:55,285
If you got a team, who's your coach?
227
00:17:55,459 --> 00:17:57,222
My dad.
228
00:17:57,861 --> 00:18:00,056
Your dad?
229
00:18:11,275 --> 00:18:14,540
There are few times in a man's life
when he can howl at the moon.
230
00:18:14,712 --> 00:18:18,375
When he gets married, when he scores
the winning touchdown in a game...
231
00:18:18,615 --> 00:18:21,345
...and when he buys his first Chevy.
Congratulations.
232
00:18:21,518 --> 00:18:24,078
- Thanks, Mr. O'Shea.
- Butz.
233
00:18:27,658 --> 00:18:30,388
- I'm going to lunch. You wanna surprise me?
- Yeah.
234
00:18:30,561 --> 00:18:33,792
- Sell a car.
- Okay. Sure.
235
00:18:52,583 --> 00:18:56,849
We're down by six points.
It's third and goal, two seconds left.
236
00:18:57,021 --> 00:18:59,353
I've been hit so many times I can't see.
237
00:18:59,523 --> 00:19:03,323
I'm busted up. I'm bleeding.
I'm so bruised I look like a code blue.
238
00:19:03,494 --> 00:19:06,292
- Two seconds? Thought it was four.
- Swore it was three.
239
00:19:06,463 --> 00:19:11,423
Believe me. It was two seconds.
Now the crowd in the stadium is going nuts.
240
00:19:11,602 --> 00:19:14,833
- All eyes are on me. I know...
- Howdy, gents.
241
00:19:15,506 --> 00:19:16,939
Already voted, mayor.
242
00:19:18,075 --> 00:19:22,341
O'Shea, I got my tail in a trap.
We gotta talk.
243
00:19:22,513 --> 00:19:25,505
Excuse me, boys. A little peewee business.
244
00:19:26,316 --> 00:19:28,216
Four seconds.
245
00:19:28,385 --> 00:19:31,377
To hell with the time,
you don't know what year it is.
246
00:19:31,555 --> 00:19:32,681
No.
247
00:19:32,856 --> 00:19:36,257
I'm feeling kind of foolish, son.
248
00:19:36,427 --> 00:19:37,724
Maybe it's the tie.
249
00:19:39,163 --> 00:19:42,997
Never mind the tie.
Now, we got a turd in the punch bowl.
250
00:19:43,167 --> 00:19:44,259
What?
251
00:19:44,435 --> 00:19:47,836
I got Urbania in the Pop Warner
league by telling everybody...
252
00:19:48,005 --> 00:19:50,838
...that the great Kevin O'Shea
was gonna be coaching.
253
00:19:51,008 --> 00:19:53,636
- Yeah?
- I just got a phone call.
254
00:19:53,811 --> 00:19:56,644
It seems there's two teams in this town.
255
00:19:56,814 --> 00:19:58,441
Who's coaching the other one?
256
00:19:58,615 --> 00:20:00,981
Hey, fellas. Good morning, Louise.
257
00:20:01,151 --> 00:20:03,210
How you doing, champ?
258
00:20:07,458 --> 00:20:08,823
- Dad.
- Hi.
259
00:20:08,992 --> 00:20:10,619
I gotta tell you something.
260
00:20:10,794 --> 00:20:14,662
Me and the guys, we're forming
our own football team. Love you a lot.
261
00:20:14,832 --> 00:20:17,096
You trying to make me
look like an idiot?
262
00:20:17,267 --> 00:20:20,065
Where do you come off
trying to put together a team?
263
00:20:20,237 --> 00:20:24,264
I mean, what makes you think
that you could coach football?
264
00:20:29,446 --> 00:20:32,142
- I just heard about this...
- I don't want to hear it.
265
00:20:32,316 --> 00:20:36,412
No, Danny. You can't coach football.
Hell, you couldn't even play.
266
00:20:36,587 --> 00:20:39,715
- Whose fault was that?
- It wasn't my fault.
267
00:20:39,890 --> 00:20:42,916
Who said life was fair?
Some of us run for touchdowns...
268
00:20:43,093 --> 00:20:44,856
...some of us run the projector.
269
00:20:45,028 --> 00:20:48,759
- I ran the class projector.
- I'm sure you were a great projectionist.
270
00:20:48,932 --> 00:20:51,833
Danny, listen, guys like you
and kids like that...
271
00:20:52,002 --> 00:20:55,563
They can't help that they're no good,
but they learn things.
272
00:20:55,739 --> 00:20:58,799
I mean they invent things.
They win Nobel Prizes.
273
00:20:58,976 --> 00:21:03,572
Einstein. Could he catch?
Did anybody care? No.
274
00:21:03,814 --> 00:21:06,044
Danny, listen to me. Listen to me.
275
00:21:06,216 --> 00:21:09,310
These things that you do
with the kids, they're great.
276
00:21:09,486 --> 00:21:11,317
I think they're admirable.
277
00:21:11,488 --> 00:21:15,720
You want to start a chess club,
a little nature walk class? This is fine.
278
00:21:17,828 --> 00:21:19,455
So let me get this straight.
279
00:21:19,630 --> 00:21:22,326
It's okay with you if I do something
with the kids?
280
00:21:22,499 --> 00:21:23,932
Sure.
281
00:21:24,535 --> 00:21:27,095
- But not football.
- Exactly.
282
00:21:27,704 --> 00:21:30,332
I knew you'd see it my way.
283
00:21:30,507 --> 00:21:31,974
- No, I don't.
- Pardon me?
284
00:21:32,142 --> 00:21:33,666
I don't see it your way.
285
00:21:34,244 --> 00:21:38,078
I've really never seen it your way.
I hate your way.
286
00:21:38,248 --> 00:21:40,808
- Now what's gotten into you?
- I'll tell you.
287
00:21:40,984 --> 00:21:44,420
You've gotten into me,
and I'm sick of it.
288
00:21:46,690 --> 00:21:50,558
- We're forming our own team.
- League rules state: One town. One team.
289
00:21:50,727 --> 00:21:52,854
- You can't have two.
- Have a playoff.
290
00:21:53,030 --> 00:21:57,194
That's a great idea, Wilbur.
How about it, fellas?
291
00:21:57,367 --> 00:21:59,301
How about it?
292
00:21:59,469 --> 00:22:02,336
Two Saturdays from today,
meet me at half-court.
293
00:22:02,506 --> 00:22:05,703
It's the 50-yard line, Dad.
294
00:22:08,212 --> 00:22:09,474
Danny...
295
00:22:10,647 --> 00:22:12,342
...you don't stand a chance.
296
00:22:12,783 --> 00:22:15,183
We just want to play.
297
00:22:18,522 --> 00:22:20,547
Yeah!
298
00:22:27,364 --> 00:22:29,992
Where are we gonna find
anybody for the team?
299
00:22:30,167 --> 00:22:32,761
Someone who's good,
not at basketball, but like...
300
00:22:32,936 --> 00:22:34,995
Are you guys kidding me?
301
00:22:43,247 --> 00:22:45,078
Nothing but glass.
302
00:22:45,249 --> 00:22:46,716
You want to play football?
303
00:22:46,883 --> 00:22:49,977
Mr. O'Shea, I have an aversion
to pain and suffering.
304
00:22:50,153 --> 00:22:52,951
Nubie, I'm not talking
about setting foot on the field.
305
00:22:53,123 --> 00:22:57,924
I need somebody to help me coach,
you know, to come up with some plays.
306
00:22:58,795 --> 00:23:00,262
What kind of plays?
307
00:23:01,965 --> 00:23:03,694
Creative plays.
308
00:23:04,001 --> 00:23:05,764
Anything goes?
309
00:23:08,005 --> 00:23:09,734
Use your imagination.
310
00:23:13,577 --> 00:23:14,566
I'm in.
311
00:23:19,750 --> 00:23:21,945
- You ever played football?
- No.
312
00:23:22,119 --> 00:23:24,485
- Do you like football?
- No.
313
00:23:24,655 --> 00:23:26,520
- You want to play football?
- No.
314
00:23:26,690 --> 00:23:28,351
Great. You can be on our team.
315
00:23:35,532 --> 00:23:37,966
Yes, that's right, flight 45.
316
00:23:38,135 --> 00:23:41,104
- Dad.
- I'll see you Tuesday, son.
317
00:23:41,271 --> 00:23:43,933
Yeah, the flight
gets in at 9:00. Don't worry.
318
00:23:57,321 --> 00:23:59,016
What about him?
319
00:23:59,189 --> 00:24:00,713
Hey.
320
00:24:06,930 --> 00:24:09,899
Merry Christmas, everybody.
321
00:24:11,234 --> 00:24:13,202
Look at this.
322
00:24:13,403 --> 00:24:15,997
There's more stuff over here.
Give me a hand.
323
00:24:18,608 --> 00:24:21,441
Careful with this.
Some of these are antiques.
324
00:24:25,315 --> 00:24:28,478
Timmy, I'm not sure,
but I don't think that goes there.
325
00:24:28,652 --> 00:24:31,849
Guys, a lot of this
equipment has been used before.
326
00:24:36,927 --> 00:24:39,088
It's a mom!
327
00:24:43,967 --> 00:24:47,596
Excuse me, coach? Hi, Mr. O'Shea.
I'm Cheryl Berman.
328
00:24:47,771 --> 00:24:51,070
I'm sorry Jake's late,
but I took him to see Dr. Harding.
329
00:24:51,241 --> 00:24:54,335
He sneezed three times this morning
and had me worried.
330
00:24:54,511 --> 00:24:56,001
You can't be too cautious.
331
00:24:56,179 --> 00:25:00,878
We never thought we'd have children,
not after 13 years. It was me.
332
00:25:01,051 --> 00:25:03,849
When I got pregnant
the doctor ordered me to bed.
333
00:25:04,020 --> 00:25:06,784
I spent nine miserable months
on my back.
334
00:25:06,957 --> 00:25:11,121
If I'd rolled over, I could've lost him.
And the birth, God only knows the pain.
335
00:25:11,294 --> 00:25:15,822
He weighed only 1 pound, 11 ounces.
He spent six weeks in an incubator.
336
00:25:15,999 --> 00:25:19,230
And I think football
is just the medicine for him.
337
00:25:22,105 --> 00:25:24,801
My shrink told her
I gotta get out more.
338
00:25:26,410 --> 00:25:29,345
- I think he's gonna be fine.
- Oh, okay.
339
00:25:41,191 --> 00:25:42,317
Cool.
340
00:25:44,027 --> 00:25:45,585
Thanks. I needed that.
341
00:25:48,198 --> 00:25:49,756
Let's kick some butt.
342
00:25:49,933 --> 00:25:53,630
- I don't know but I've been told
- Butz's butt is green with mold
343
00:25:53,804 --> 00:25:57,865
- You say thank you, I say please
- Kevin sits down when he pees
344
00:26:06,082 --> 00:26:08,573
Looking good. Real good.
345
00:26:09,886 --> 00:26:12,855
All right. Let's stretch it out. Come on.
346
00:27:01,204 --> 00:27:03,434
He throws. It's up.
347
00:27:06,109 --> 00:27:10,273
Yeah! Touchdown!
348
00:27:22,592 --> 00:27:25,755
- What a throw.
- What a find.
349
00:27:25,929 --> 00:27:29,421
What a hunk. Wait a minute.
350
00:27:29,966 --> 00:27:31,831
What am I saying?
351
00:27:32,002 --> 00:27:33,936
I'm the Icebox.
352
00:27:34,104 --> 00:27:37,039
The Icebox doesn't like boys...
353
00:27:37,707 --> 00:27:39,538
...except for that one.
354
00:27:43,847 --> 00:27:46,975
Hey, buddy, catch this.
355
00:27:47,784 --> 00:27:49,684
- He caught it.
- Good catch.
356
00:27:50,086 --> 00:27:52,577
Nice arm.
357
00:27:53,356 --> 00:27:55,187
- Junior Floyd.
- I'm Hanon.
358
00:27:55,358 --> 00:27:56,620
- Zolteck.
- What's up?
359
00:27:56,793 --> 00:27:58,385
- I'm Tad.
- Cool.
360
00:27:59,796 --> 00:28:04,130
- You wanna play some football?
- Yeah, let's see that arm again.
361
00:28:10,173 --> 00:28:11,470
Where is he?
362
00:28:11,641 --> 00:28:13,472
Hey, you.
363
00:28:22,752 --> 00:28:24,185
Hi.
364
00:28:26,923 --> 00:28:30,950
Dad, don't tell jokes. You can't tell jokes.
You never could tell jokes.
365
00:28:31,127 --> 00:28:33,823
I'm gonna ask his mother
if he can play football.
366
00:28:33,997 --> 00:28:36,989
I can't go in there.
I'd look like a geek.
367
00:28:37,167 --> 00:28:40,694
This doesn't sound like you.
You got a crush on this guy?
368
00:28:40,870 --> 00:28:45,068
I'm the Icebox.
I don't get crushes.
369
00:28:51,014 --> 00:28:52,675
Oh, my God. There he is.
370
00:28:52,849 --> 00:28:55,613
- He is so cute.
- Relax.
371
00:28:58,989 --> 00:29:01,753
- You didn't tell me his mother's Patty Floyd.
- So?
372
00:29:01,925 --> 00:29:04,325
I knew her when I was a kid.
I had a thing...
373
00:29:04,494 --> 00:29:07,019
- Would you get a grip?
- Me? You get a grip.
374
00:29:07,597 --> 00:29:10,361
- One of us has gotta knock on that door.
- You.
375
00:29:10,533 --> 00:29:13,058
- We need a quarterback. Do it.
- No, you do it.
376
00:29:17,073 --> 00:29:20,270
Hey. You traitor!
377
00:29:28,885 --> 00:29:31,080
Hi. Can I?
378
00:29:34,190 --> 00:29:36,317
- Danny?
- Hi.
379
00:29:37,427 --> 00:29:41,227
- Danny O'Shea, how are you?
- Fine. Really good.
380
00:29:41,398 --> 00:29:44,367
- Well, come on in.
- Sure.
381
00:29:52,008 --> 00:29:53,635
Ready.
382
00:29:54,010 --> 00:29:55,341
Go.
383
00:30:00,917 --> 00:30:04,580
- Man, what an arm.
- Ready. Go.
384
00:30:31,481 --> 00:30:35,178
Hanon, nice try. All right, guys.
Let's give it another shot.
385
00:30:35,351 --> 00:30:37,512
Use your hands.
386
00:30:38,021 --> 00:30:41,957
Ready. Go!
387
00:30:44,294 --> 00:30:47,695
Oh, good catch, guys. Good catch!
388
00:30:49,032 --> 00:30:52,195
My mom says the pads you gave me
weren't enough.
389
00:30:58,942 --> 00:31:00,432
Push him.
390
00:31:04,414 --> 00:31:06,473
Hey, this is great. Keep it up.
391
00:31:06,649 --> 00:31:07,673
I don't feel a...
392
00:31:10,887 --> 00:31:14,050
- Jake?
- Jake?
393
00:31:24,000 --> 00:31:27,527
- He will never do it.
- They've done it already.
394
00:31:27,704 --> 00:31:29,501
- Make your bet.
- Make your bet.
395
00:31:29,672 --> 00:31:32,903
If these boys don't win,
I sweep the shop for three weeks.
396
00:31:33,076 --> 00:31:36,341
It's gonna be a landslide,
and I'll say it again.
397
00:31:36,513 --> 00:31:39,914
- lf they don't win, I'll sweep it for a month.
- Good.
398
00:31:40,083 --> 00:31:42,779
- You got witnesses. Understand?
- Remember this.
399
00:31:42,952 --> 00:31:44,749
Stand like this. Come on in.
400
00:31:44,921 --> 00:31:48,618
It's a huddle. Huddle, Latin for round.
Turn around. There you go.
401
00:31:48,792 --> 00:31:52,853
Communication is the key.
I signal the quarterback with the play.
402
00:31:53,029 --> 00:31:57,728
He relates it to you in the huddle. Then,
we try it on the field. Okay, let's do it.
403
00:31:58,101 --> 00:32:01,195
Okay, guys. It's a curl
out to the fullback on two.
404
00:32:01,371 --> 00:32:04,602
Hey, wait a second.
How come we never call a play for me?
405
00:32:04,774 --> 00:32:06,605
- You're a tackle, dip-head.
- Hey!
406
00:32:06,776 --> 00:32:09,210
Nobody calls me a dip-head
except my sister.
407
00:32:09,379 --> 00:32:11,370
Hey, guys. Guys. Guys, wait!
408
00:32:11,548 --> 00:32:13,573
Guys, I'll run the ball.
409
00:32:13,750 --> 00:32:16,548
You always run the ball.
Why can't I run the ball?
410
00:32:16,719 --> 00:32:19,119
Because you're slow
and no one likes you.
411
00:32:19,289 --> 00:32:21,257
- Says who?
- Everybody says.
412
00:32:21,724 --> 00:32:23,123
- I call the play.
- You suck!
413
00:32:23,293 --> 00:32:25,056
I want to run the ball.
414
00:32:25,228 --> 00:32:27,753
- You can't go to my birthday party.
- So what?
415
00:32:30,567 --> 00:32:34,230
Okay, guys. That was good
for a first time. Let's try it again.
416
00:32:34,404 --> 00:32:36,804
Ready. Go!
417
00:32:41,477 --> 00:32:43,308
Nice pass. Nice catch.
418
00:32:46,649 --> 00:32:47,946
Junior.
419
00:32:54,824 --> 00:32:57,816
Ready. Go!
420
00:33:02,999 --> 00:33:05,593
- Yeah!
- Yes!
421
00:33:05,768 --> 00:33:07,360
All right!
422
00:33:10,540 --> 00:33:15,341
Very nice. Okay, from now on, we'll play
with this. Put this in the bathroom.
423
00:33:28,124 --> 00:33:31,787
- Good job, Icebox.
- Thanks.
424
00:33:31,961 --> 00:33:33,053
Anytime.
425
00:33:37,300 --> 00:33:41,327
- I'll get the quarterback.
- Hut one. Hut two.
426
00:33:42,972 --> 00:33:44,963
Got you!
427
00:33:47,310 --> 00:33:49,972
Okay, Icebox. You can get off me.
428
00:33:50,146 --> 00:33:52,740
Oh, sorry.
429
00:33:57,253 --> 00:34:02,247
Gentlemen, that is your opponent.
You must defeat her at all costs.
430
00:34:02,425 --> 00:34:04,655
Patterson, Becky is all they've got.
431
00:34:04,827 --> 00:34:07,591
She's strong.
I want you to hit her low and hard.
432
00:34:07,764 --> 00:34:09,061
Get in your position.
433
00:34:09,232 --> 00:34:12,258
Head up, butt down. Stick and drive.
434
00:34:12,568 --> 00:34:14,001
Set. Go!
435
00:34:17,040 --> 00:34:21,739
Oh, son. Son, it's a couch cushion.
It's a couch cushion, son!
436
00:34:21,911 --> 00:34:24,709
I want you to wrap your arms
and drive through it.
437
00:34:24,881 --> 00:34:28,578
- Stand back. Let the master do this.
- Let's go, coach!
438
00:34:28,751 --> 00:34:32,187
- Priscilla, I want you to shoot this.
- Go for it, Daddy.
439
00:34:33,022 --> 00:34:37,459
Briggs, count it off.
440
00:34:41,097 --> 00:34:42,860
Ready.
441
00:34:43,099 --> 00:34:44,964
Set. Go!
442
00:34:46,536 --> 00:34:47,935
Kevin!
443
00:34:54,544 --> 00:34:57,445
Oh, doctor!
444
00:34:59,749 --> 00:35:01,614
Coach!
445
00:35:01,784 --> 00:35:03,115
Daddy!
446
00:35:08,691 --> 00:35:12,718
If there's gonna be pee wee football
in Urbania, everybody's gonna play.
447
00:35:12,895 --> 00:35:18,060
Big round of applause for the Little Giants.
448
00:35:21,404 --> 00:35:23,736
She's buff. She's bad.
449
00:35:23,906 --> 00:35:28,240
She's Becky "The Icebox" O'Shea.
450
00:35:29,479 --> 00:35:34,815
All right. Let's give it up
for "Rad" Tad Simpson.
451
00:35:39,989 --> 00:35:44,688
Rudy Zolteck,
your neighborhood-friendly gasman.
452
00:35:47,130 --> 00:35:49,257
Gasman? I don't get it.
453
00:35:49,432 --> 00:35:50,763
Think about it.
454
00:35:50,933 --> 00:35:54,767
Here's Rasheed "Hot Hands" Hanon!
455
00:35:59,842 --> 00:36:04,609
Say hello to
Timmy "I Wanna Score" Moore.
456
00:36:10,219 --> 00:36:12,016
- Thanks for coming.
- That was great.
457
00:36:12,188 --> 00:36:14,622
- I want a copy of that.
- You got it.
458
00:36:14,791 --> 00:36:17,954
Johnny, I thought I was gonna
meet your dad tonight.
459
00:36:18,127 --> 00:36:22,120
He's got business and stuff.
See you, coach.
460
00:36:22,298 --> 00:36:24,357
- I'll see you.
- Bye.
461
00:36:24,534 --> 00:36:27,196
Well, the dip sucked.
462
00:36:27,370 --> 00:36:30,134
But bottom line, you're okay,
Coach O'Shea.
463
00:36:30,306 --> 00:36:32,137
Thanks, Junior.
464
00:36:32,308 --> 00:36:35,539
Do you have time to get me
your brother's autograph?
465
00:36:35,711 --> 00:36:38,805
Oh, let's go.
466
00:36:39,649 --> 00:36:41,947
- This was such a blast.
- It was nothing.
467
00:36:42,118 --> 00:36:44,985
No, you're doing an amazing job
with those kids.
468
00:36:45,154 --> 00:36:49,215
All that time I knew you, I had no idea
that you would be like this.
469
00:36:49,392 --> 00:36:51,690
- Well, I was 11.
- Yeah.
470
00:36:51,861 --> 00:36:54,159
I guess I've changed.
471
00:36:54,330 --> 00:36:56,491
Yeah, I guess you're right.
472
00:36:56,666 --> 00:36:57,690
Have I changed?
473
00:36:58,167 --> 00:37:01,830
Well, you're taller,
and you have your driver's license.
474
00:37:02,004 --> 00:37:07,567
And to be honest with you,
your face is exactly as I remember it.
475
00:37:08,344 --> 00:37:10,744
Come on, Mom.
476
00:37:12,748 --> 00:37:14,511
Good night, Danny.
477
00:37:14,684 --> 00:37:16,584
See you, coach.
478
00:37:16,752 --> 00:37:19,585
Good night, you guys. Sleep tightly.
479
00:37:19,755 --> 00:37:21,416
Tightly?
480
00:37:21,591 --> 00:37:23,525
Dumb.
481
00:37:23,926 --> 00:37:26,724
Okay, let's clean it up.
482
00:37:29,432 --> 00:37:31,866
There he goes.
483
00:37:32,702 --> 00:37:34,761
I love this. Wait, wait, wait.
484
00:37:36,706 --> 00:37:40,938
Hey, Karen, how many times you gonna
watch this? It's making me nauseous.
485
00:37:41,110 --> 00:37:42,099
You kill me.
486
00:37:42,278 --> 00:37:46,112
No, Mom. Mom, let's calm down.
Let's calm down.
487
00:37:46,282 --> 00:37:50,446
You know, I was only trying to make
a point that Becky's all they got...
488
00:37:50,620 --> 00:37:53,384
...and to win, we've gotta neutralize her.
489
00:37:53,556 --> 00:37:56,081
Wait, wait, wait. What about Junior?
490
00:37:58,261 --> 00:37:59,250
Who?
491
00:38:02,131 --> 00:38:07,125
Hut one! Hut two! Hut three!
492
00:38:10,473 --> 00:38:12,941
Look at the cannon on that kid.
493
00:38:15,144 --> 00:38:16,941
He's playing for the wrong team.
494
00:38:17,113 --> 00:38:20,310
Hut one! Hut two! Hut three!
495
00:38:24,587 --> 00:38:27,613
- Yeah!
- That's the way. All right. Come on back.
496
00:38:32,428 --> 00:38:35,261
That's good, Johnny. Keep your head up.
497
00:38:35,431 --> 00:38:37,592
Spies.
498
00:38:37,767 --> 00:38:41,134
- Where?
- In the weeds.
499
00:38:41,837 --> 00:38:44,169
Somebody's a little scared, huh?
500
00:38:45,441 --> 00:38:49,775
Okay. Take a little break. Then, we'll
start running the super-secret play.
501
00:38:49,946 --> 00:38:52,039
I'm just gonna get the diagram.
502
00:38:52,782 --> 00:38:54,943
Coach, they're gonna do
the super-secret play.
503
00:38:57,111 --> 00:39:00,672
State police? Oh, thank God.
This is Thelma May Rogers.
504
00:39:00,848 --> 00:39:02,611
I'm 86. I live in Urbania.
505
00:39:02,783 --> 00:39:06,082
There are two men down the bridge
from the Shell station...
506
00:39:06,253 --> 00:39:09,188
...in the bushes spying on some kids.
507
00:39:09,356 --> 00:39:10,789
We're all so upset.
508
00:39:10,958 --> 00:39:15,292
I don't think men their age should be
parading around in their underwear.
509
00:39:15,462 --> 00:39:17,953
Please, hurry.
510
00:39:18,132 --> 00:39:19,394
- Nice going.
- Yeah.
511
00:39:20,200 --> 00:39:23,795
This is incredible.
They got the guards in the backfield.
512
00:39:23,971 --> 00:39:28,374
They... They got the center
to the right, and...
513
00:39:28,542 --> 00:39:30,976
And the quarterback isn't even there.
514
00:39:31,145 --> 00:39:34,205
They're standing around, Butz.
515
00:39:37,985 --> 00:39:39,247
Oh, yeah.
516
00:39:40,554 --> 00:39:42,146
Freeze!
517
00:39:43,624 --> 00:39:46,821
- I'm on a roll, huh?
- Your sandwich, dangerous one.
518
00:39:46,994 --> 00:39:50,157
Last night, I go out the window.
Today, I'm arrested...
519
00:39:50,330 --> 00:39:53,163
...handcuffed, humiliated. My own brother!
520
00:39:53,333 --> 00:39:55,995
lmagine how I feel married
to a peeping Tom.
521
00:39:56,170 --> 00:39:57,762
That was a brilliant move...
522
00:39:57,938 --> 00:40:00,839
...calling the state cops
instead of the local cops.
523
00:40:01,008 --> 00:40:04,341
I didn't think Danny had it in him.
I will get him back.
524
00:40:04,511 --> 00:40:07,742
This could've been avoided
if you'd just formed one team.
525
00:40:07,915 --> 00:40:11,681
Don't you understand that the people
of this town expect me to win?
526
00:40:11,852 --> 00:40:16,585
- Nobody buys a Chevy from a loser!
- Honey, this is peewee football. Remember?
527
00:40:16,757 --> 00:40:19,248
- It's supposed to be fun.
- It's not fun anymore.
528
00:40:19,426 --> 00:40:23,886
See, all the fun is gone now.
See, now it's war.
529
00:40:24,765 --> 00:40:27,131
Come on. Let's go. Keep moving.
530
00:40:29,670 --> 00:40:31,729
Come on. Make that cut.
531
00:40:33,040 --> 00:40:36,305
Come on. Come on. Protect the ball.
Good. Good.
532
00:40:37,711 --> 00:40:40,646
Lift them. Lift those legs. Thattaboy.
533
00:40:41,215 --> 00:40:42,648
Drive, drive, drive!
534
00:40:42,816 --> 00:40:44,784
Come on. Unload on this thing!
535
00:40:47,487 --> 00:40:49,819
Very nice. Looking good. Looking good.
536
00:40:49,990 --> 00:40:53,619
Hit. Hit. Hit. Hit. Hit.
537
00:40:53,794 --> 00:40:56,228
That's right, guys. Make them pop.
538
00:40:58,899 --> 00:41:00,560
Yes!
539
00:41:54,354 --> 00:41:57,152
You'll have to put the top up
if you want us to wash it.
540
00:41:57,324 --> 00:41:58,951
I didn't come for a car wash.
541
00:41:59,126 --> 00:42:03,688
You're wasting our time with this team.
We should concentrate on Sutterville.
542
00:42:03,864 --> 00:42:07,732
Jeez, Dan, you don't even belong
on the same field as your brother.
543
00:42:07,901 --> 00:42:10,233
One dollar for the wash, Butz.
544
00:42:10,871 --> 00:42:14,034
You'll just embarrass yourself
with them dirt-balls.
545
00:42:14,308 --> 00:42:18,142
Hell, if I was a mama hen
and they was my chicks...
546
00:42:18,312 --> 00:42:21,713
...l'd lead them to water
and let them drown.
547
00:42:21,882 --> 00:42:25,045
Harold, you're the tenth car
that's come in here today.
548
00:42:25,218 --> 00:42:27,152
You're entitled to a free wash.
549
00:42:27,321 --> 00:42:29,380
Okay, guys. Wash it.
550
00:42:54,014 --> 00:42:57,006
Hey, Junior.
551
00:43:03,924 --> 00:43:05,858
Truce.
552
00:43:07,928 --> 00:43:09,919
No!
553
00:43:12,199 --> 00:43:15,362
Hey, Dan, we're next.
554
00:43:15,535 --> 00:43:17,025
- Hey, Uncle Dan.
- Hi, Deb.
555
00:43:17,204 --> 00:43:18,432
- Hi, Junior.
- Hey.
556
00:43:18,605 --> 00:43:22,302
Hey, Becky, check it out. My mom
got us new uniforms for the game.
557
00:43:22,776 --> 00:43:25,108
- Cool.
- I am so jealous of you...
558
00:43:25,278 --> 00:43:29,942
...being in the huddle with Junior Floyd!
Even 12-year-old girls think he's a fox.
559
00:43:30,117 --> 00:43:33,712
- Yeah, well, I really don't notice.
- Well, see you.
560
00:43:33,887 --> 00:43:35,377
Yeah.
561
00:43:35,555 --> 00:43:36,715
Hey. Hi, Junior.
562
00:43:36,890 --> 00:43:37,879
What's up?
563
00:43:38,058 --> 00:43:41,459
I wanted to let you know
I'm gonna be at the game Saturday.
564
00:43:41,628 --> 00:43:44,654
Hey, Icebox, maybe you
should become a cheerleader.
565
00:43:46,967 --> 00:43:48,298
Bubbles and stuff.
566
00:43:52,406 --> 00:43:54,806
Junior!
567
00:43:54,975 --> 00:43:57,500
Hey, don't!
568
00:43:59,312 --> 00:44:00,506
There you go.
569
00:44:20,333 --> 00:44:23,530
Give me a J
Give me a U
570
00:44:23,703 --> 00:44:26,297
- Give me an N
- Becky!
571
00:44:30,844 --> 00:44:33,506
Hey, I got an idea
for a whole new defense.
572
00:44:33,680 --> 00:44:37,946
I read about a monster-back thing where
you run around causing destruction.
573
00:44:38,618 --> 00:44:40,950
Are you wearing lipstick?
574
00:44:41,288 --> 00:44:44,348
No. It's a cherry Tootsie Pop.
575
00:44:55,969 --> 00:44:57,402
O'Shea Chevrolet.
576
00:44:57,637 --> 00:45:00,071
I got a hot tip for you, Mr. Heisman.
577
00:45:01,208 --> 00:45:03,233
Butz!
578
00:45:03,477 --> 00:45:07,208
- Go ahead, Orville. I'm listening.
- There's a new family in town.
579
00:45:07,380 --> 00:45:10,178
They got a tough 10-year-old.
He's a monster.
580
00:45:10,350 --> 00:45:12,215
Now I'm talking real big.
581
00:45:12,385 --> 00:45:13,545
Oh, yeah? How big?
582
00:45:13,720 --> 00:45:14,982
Put it this way.
583
00:45:15,155 --> 00:45:18,090
If he was a trout,
you wouldn't throw him back.
584
00:45:18,258 --> 00:45:22,160
- Thanks a lot, buddy. I owe you one.
- Thanks.
585
00:45:31,738 --> 00:45:35,003
- Hi, big Jim.
- Hey there, Kevin.
586
00:45:39,079 --> 00:45:41,343
Hey, Kev. Where you going?
587
00:45:41,515 --> 00:45:44,177
Just out for a little spin, Danny.
588
00:45:44,351 --> 00:45:45,750
What's with the go-cart?
589
00:45:46,186 --> 00:45:49,212
Becky asked me to check the compression.
590
00:46:00,534 --> 00:46:02,525
- You following me?
- No.
591
00:46:04,104 --> 00:46:05,366
You following me?
592
00:46:05,539 --> 00:46:07,439
No.
593
00:46:08,542 --> 00:46:10,908
- Are you lying to me?
- No.
594
00:46:12,779 --> 00:46:14,644
He's mine, Danny! Damn it!
595
00:46:14,814 --> 00:46:17,374
Here they come! Danny's in the go-cart.
596
00:46:27,894 --> 00:46:29,725
This whole town may love you...
597
00:46:29,896 --> 00:46:32,729
...but I'm the only one
who knows how sick you are.
598
00:46:32,899 --> 00:46:35,766
- I treated you like a prince.
- You ignored me!
599
00:46:35,936 --> 00:46:39,838
- I took you to see the Cleveland Indians.
- You left me at the stadium.
600
00:47:03,463 --> 00:47:05,192
Damn it!
601
00:47:25,952 --> 00:47:27,351
Excuse me.
602
00:47:27,520 --> 00:47:29,454
Are you...?
603
00:47:29,623 --> 00:47:32,319
Hey, don't tell me. You're Coach O'Shea.
604
00:47:33,860 --> 00:47:35,487
Yeah, I'm Coach O'Shea.
605
00:47:36,529 --> 00:47:41,023
You're Coach O'Shea! Who am I?
Look at this.
606
00:47:42,802 --> 00:47:44,133
Who am I?
607
00:47:44,638 --> 00:47:47,368
Oh, you're remembering
my old playing days.
608
00:47:47,540 --> 00:47:49,474
Remembering them? I treasure them.
609
00:47:49,643 --> 00:47:54,012
You're the reason we moved to this town,
you and that football league.
610
00:47:54,748 --> 00:47:59,481
You... You look kind of small
for a football star.
611
00:48:03,857 --> 00:48:06,382
That's what they all thought.
612
00:48:08,561 --> 00:48:10,222
Yeah.
613
00:48:10,397 --> 00:48:13,025
- So where is your?
- His name's Spike.
614
00:48:13,199 --> 00:48:14,723
He's right here.
615
00:48:14,901 --> 00:48:16,334
Hang on a second. Spike!
616
00:48:16,736 --> 00:48:19,000
Come on down here.
617
00:48:20,006 --> 00:48:22,236
I want you to meet Coach O'Shea.
618
00:48:29,082 --> 00:48:32,279
Look at the boy.
He was bred for football glory.
619
00:48:32,452 --> 00:48:34,852
The first skin he touched was a pigskin.
620
00:48:35,021 --> 00:48:39,014
Pushing a football across the floor
with his head at four months old.
621
00:48:39,192 --> 00:48:43,128
Did his first pull-up when he was
18 months. Give me 10!
622
00:48:44,364 --> 00:48:47,856
Runs a 40 in 6.5 flat.
Bench-presses twice his own weight.
623
00:48:48,268 --> 00:48:53,137
Won the 8-year-old division of the pass,
punt, run when he was 5 years old.
624
00:48:53,606 --> 00:48:58,942
O'Shea, I've been cultivating him,
grooming him.
625
00:48:59,112 --> 00:49:01,376
Every night, before he goes to bed...
626
00:49:01,548 --> 00:49:06,611
...I massage his hamstrings
with evaporated milk. Yeah.
627
00:49:08,722 --> 00:49:10,451
He's quite a boy.
628
00:49:11,024 --> 00:49:12,150
Play to die!
629
00:49:12,459 --> 00:49:14,791
Knees high! Knees high!
630
00:49:15,061 --> 00:49:18,462
Guys, I got great news.
631
00:49:18,898 --> 00:49:20,388
We got a new player.
632
00:49:20,800 --> 00:49:21,892
Mama!
633
00:49:22,068 --> 00:49:24,798
- Who's that?
- Looks like a side of beef.
634
00:49:24,971 --> 00:49:27,735
Or a genetics experiment
gone terribly wrong.
635
00:49:27,907 --> 00:49:30,137
- Where's his socks?
- Where's his neck?
636
00:49:30,310 --> 00:49:31,902
He's bigger than my dad.
637
00:49:32,078 --> 00:49:38,017
Spike's in hell.
Spike's in peewee hell.
638
00:49:38,184 --> 00:49:40,118
Guys, Spike's our new tailback.
639
00:49:40,286 --> 00:49:42,914
Now we can run the annexation
of Puerto Rico.
640
00:49:43,089 --> 00:49:46,320
- What's that?
- I don't know if we're ready for that.
641
00:49:46,493 --> 00:49:52,022
- What formation do you like to run out of?
- Power-I. Now, who's Spike's lead blocker?
642
00:49:52,499 --> 00:49:53,591
The Icebox.
643
00:49:53,767 --> 00:49:56,930
- Where's he at?
- Right here.
644
00:49:57,337 --> 00:50:01,000
Is Spike mistaken? Aren't you a girl?
645
00:50:01,174 --> 00:50:02,436
Gee, good eye.
646
00:50:02,609 --> 00:50:05,942
- Spike don't play with girls.
- She's pretty good, Spike.
647
00:50:06,112 --> 00:50:08,672
Spike don't care. Didn't you hear?
648
00:50:09,015 --> 00:50:10,346
Spike don't play with...
649
00:50:10,950 --> 00:50:14,113
I can tackle anything, anytime, anywhere.
Got that?
650
00:50:14,287 --> 00:50:17,620
Look, you berserk-o Barbie doll,
when you mess with Spike...
651
00:50:17,791 --> 00:50:21,158
...you mess with death.
- Can you walk the walk?
652
00:50:21,327 --> 00:50:22,351
- Try me!
- I will!
653
00:50:22,529 --> 00:50:24,156
- Let's go!
- Right now!
654
00:50:24,330 --> 00:50:26,161
Somebody call 911!
655
00:50:26,466 --> 00:50:29,230
All right. Okay. Okay. Hold it.
656
00:50:30,970 --> 00:50:33,370
Becky, wanna get that car for me, please?
657
00:50:33,540 --> 00:50:36,566
Why me? So you can play with this ape?
658
00:50:37,811 --> 00:50:40,644
Can I have a little word with you, please?
659
00:50:45,318 --> 00:50:47,809
Your leg's bigger than my body.
660
00:50:47,987 --> 00:50:51,047
With this guy, we got an actual shot
at winning this.
661
00:50:51,224 --> 00:50:55,160
Give me a minute to get him used
to the idea of playing with a girl.
662
00:50:55,328 --> 00:50:58,320
You don't think I can take him, do you?
663
00:50:59,732 --> 00:51:02,826
This is a bunch of crap.
664
00:51:21,521 --> 00:51:24,012
- Shirley.
- Hi, Kevin.
665
00:51:30,430 --> 00:51:32,921
Icebox not hungry?
666
00:51:33,099 --> 00:51:35,590
Alert the media.
667
00:51:35,935 --> 00:51:40,201
- How you doing, hotshot?
- Hey, Louise. Thank you, dear.
668
00:51:43,042 --> 00:51:45,203
Good shot.
669
00:51:45,378 --> 00:51:48,609
- You still mad at me for not picking you?
- No.
670
00:51:48,781 --> 00:51:52,046
- I guess you got your own team now.
- It's not my team.
671
00:51:52,218 --> 00:51:55,051
It's Spike's team.
672
00:51:56,556 --> 00:51:59,116
Dad's got a big crush on him.
673
00:51:59,292 --> 00:52:01,522
Don't be so hard on the old man.
674
00:52:01,694 --> 00:52:05,221
It can't be easy on him
having me as a brother...
675
00:52:05,398 --> 00:52:07,992
...or you as a daughter.
676
00:52:08,167 --> 00:52:09,896
Very funny.
677
00:52:10,069 --> 00:52:12,970
People like you and me, we're stubborn.
678
00:52:13,139 --> 00:52:16,404
If we don't get our own way, watch out.
679
00:52:16,576 --> 00:52:20,103
When you played football
you wanted to kill your coach too?
680
00:52:20,280 --> 00:52:22,942
Hey, you can't fault the guy
for trying to win.
681
00:52:23,416 --> 00:52:25,816
He doesn't wanna win.
682
00:52:25,985 --> 00:52:28,419
He wants to prove he's not scared of you.
683
00:52:28,821 --> 00:52:29,913
What do you want?
684
00:52:30,323 --> 00:52:34,089
I thought I wanted to play,
but now there's all this other stuff.
685
00:52:34,260 --> 00:52:36,490
What other stuff?
686
00:52:36,663 --> 00:52:39,427
Not football stuff.
687
00:52:41,768 --> 00:52:45,260
Debbie likes Junior, doesn't she?
688
00:52:45,939 --> 00:52:48,203
Does Veronica like Archie?
689
00:52:51,010 --> 00:52:54,138
She's gonna get him. I know it.
690
00:52:54,781 --> 00:52:58,683
You know, she'd probably kill me
if she knew I told you this...
691
00:52:58,851 --> 00:53:04,118
...but you wanna find a boy,
you gotta figure out how boys think.
692
00:53:04,290 --> 00:53:08,954
And if this boy's a quarterback,
he's probably gonna want some cute girl...
693
00:53:09,128 --> 00:53:10,686
...not some teammate.
694
00:53:12,465 --> 00:53:14,956
But I don't know about being a cute girl.
695
00:53:15,134 --> 00:53:16,533
I'm good at sports.
696
00:53:16,703 --> 00:53:19,968
Of course you are. You're an O'Shea.
697
00:53:21,040 --> 00:53:25,136
But listen to me.
You got a lot more to offer than football.
698
00:53:26,145 --> 00:53:28,079
- A lot more.
- You think so?
699
00:53:28,247 --> 00:53:30,477
I know so.
700
00:53:31,317 --> 00:53:33,842
Hey, Uncle Kevin.
701
00:53:36,322 --> 00:53:38,654
Do you think I'm pretty?
702
00:53:38,825 --> 00:53:40,019
No.
703
00:53:42,662 --> 00:53:45,153
I think you're beautiful.
704
00:53:56,843 --> 00:53:59,835
Okay, guys. Let's make
this power-I formation work.
705
00:54:00,013 --> 00:54:02,846
- Ready!
- Break!
706
00:54:05,918 --> 00:54:08,512
Ready. Set.
707
00:54:08,688 --> 00:54:12,089
Hut one. Hut two!
708
00:54:15,862 --> 00:54:18,592
You call this a team?
709
00:54:19,932 --> 00:54:22,696
Hey, pretty boy,
when you hand off to Spike...
710
00:54:22,869 --> 00:54:25,099
...put it here. Boom!
711
00:54:25,271 --> 00:54:26,863
And you, fat lineman!
712
00:54:27,206 --> 00:54:28,867
You rang?
713
00:54:29,042 --> 00:54:31,533
Get your jellyrolls out of Spike's way...
714
00:54:31,711 --> 00:54:34,407
...unless you want cleat marks
up your fat back.
715
00:54:37,116 --> 00:54:39,107
Spike!
716
00:54:39,786 --> 00:54:42,277
Come get in the car, son.
717
00:54:42,722 --> 00:54:43,984
What's going on?
718
00:54:44,157 --> 00:54:47,615
Oh, no.
719
00:54:48,461 --> 00:54:49,792
You're a Cowboy now.
720
00:54:49,962 --> 00:54:52,328
Thank you, football god.
721
00:54:52,498 --> 00:54:53,624
Where's he going?
722
00:54:53,800 --> 00:54:55,791
So you're a Heisman Trophy winner?
723
00:54:55,968 --> 00:54:58,766
I said I was Coach O'Shea, not Kevin.
724
00:54:58,938 --> 00:55:01,270
You must think you're pretty slick, huh?
725
00:55:01,441 --> 00:55:03,466
I can't wait till tomorrow.
726
00:55:03,643 --> 00:55:06,237
One more day, baby!
727
00:55:06,813 --> 00:55:08,940
One more day.
728
00:55:17,790 --> 00:55:21,248
- Great. Now the other guys have Spike.
- We got nothing.
729
00:55:21,427 --> 00:55:23,156
- We got us.
- Yeah, we stink!
730
00:55:23,329 --> 00:55:26,492
- Because you can't catch.
- At least he can walk.
731
00:55:26,666 --> 00:55:32,002
- Hey, Zolteck, have another Pop-Tart.
- Or can't you open your mouth wide enough?
732
00:55:32,171 --> 00:55:35,607
- Come on, that's enough.
- Yeah, coach is right. Break it up.
733
00:55:35,775 --> 00:55:38,471
Shut up, Junior. You're so good
it makes us sick.
734
00:55:39,011 --> 00:55:44,847
Hey, you don't want me to play?
No problemo. I'm out of here.
735
00:55:45,017 --> 00:55:47,850
If it wasn't for him,
we wouldn't even have a team.
736
00:55:48,020 --> 00:55:52,548
If it wasn't for him, maybe you'd stop
drooling and play a little more football.
737
00:55:52,725 --> 00:55:53,953
Yeah, he's right!
738
00:55:55,094 --> 00:55:57,085
Why can't we all play together?
739
00:55:57,263 --> 00:56:01,131
Oh, shut up, dipstick! You're probably
the main reason Spike quit.
740
00:56:01,300 --> 00:56:03,200
Yeah, quit bawling, you big baby.
741
00:56:03,369 --> 00:56:07,635
I can cry if I want. It's a free country.
I can even do this.
742
00:56:09,375 --> 00:56:11,343
Nice kick!
743
00:56:13,980 --> 00:56:15,971
Hey, guys, practice isn't over yet.
744
00:56:16,149 --> 00:56:18,982
Who cares?
745
00:56:32,765 --> 00:56:38,499
What's the use? I am a dipstick.
I'll never get to play.
746
00:56:40,339 --> 00:56:41,863
Hey, kid, you got a second?
747
00:56:42,041 --> 00:56:45,841
We have to get to a banquet in Canton,
where the Hall of Fame is.
748
00:56:46,012 --> 00:56:50,346
And we took a wrong turn somewhere.
Look, we started out here on l-7 east.
749
00:56:50,516 --> 00:56:52,882
We're coming across here.
We went up 104.
750
00:56:53,052 --> 00:56:57,352
We took the 49. Then we were gonna take
shortcuts. We go 10, 12, 48. Hut.
751
00:56:57,523 --> 00:57:00,515
And we have to hit Canton,
and we have to hit it hard.
752
00:57:00,693 --> 00:57:02,593
And I don't know where we are!
753
00:57:05,531 --> 00:57:07,522
Guys?
754
00:57:08,367 --> 00:57:09,561
Now what?
755
00:57:09,936 --> 00:57:12,871
Let's play some ball.
756
00:57:16,275 --> 00:57:18,300
- Steve Emtman.
- Emmitt Smith.
757
00:57:18,477 --> 00:57:19,967
Tim Brown.
758
00:57:20,146 --> 00:57:22,740
- Bruce Smith.
- Emmitt Smith.
759
00:57:28,254 --> 00:57:30,119
Take a shot. Just block me.
760
00:57:32,124 --> 00:57:33,751
Come on. You can do it.
761
00:57:35,228 --> 00:57:36,718
- No way.
- Don't be scared.
762
00:57:36,896 --> 00:57:39,194
Run through me. Run through me.
Come on.
763
00:57:39,365 --> 00:57:42,391
Get the fear out of your eyes!
Let's go! Come on!
764
00:57:48,241 --> 00:57:49,936
Yeah!
765
00:57:52,578 --> 00:57:54,637
All right. All right now. Good job.
766
00:57:54,814 --> 00:57:59,410
Just remember, football's 80%% mental,
40%% physical.
767
00:57:59,752 --> 00:58:01,811
- Right.
- Right.
768
00:58:03,322 --> 00:58:04,311
What?
769
00:58:04,657 --> 00:58:07,854
I wasn't always the biggest.
I wasn't always the fastest.
770
00:58:08,427 --> 00:58:11,828
I wasn't always the smartest.
But I believed within myself...
771
00:58:12,164 --> 00:58:13,654
...that I was a giant.
772
00:58:13,933 --> 00:58:17,664
He pivots, fakes, chucks the big bomb
halfway down the field...
773
00:58:17,837 --> 00:58:20,601
...to our, hopefully,
still wide-open tailback.
774
00:58:20,773 --> 00:58:23,264
I call it the annexation of Puerto Rico.
775
00:58:23,442 --> 00:58:25,273
- Not bad.
- Really?
776
00:58:25,444 --> 00:58:27,275
I kind of stole it from you.
777
00:58:27,446 --> 00:58:29,846
Raiders-Vikings, Super Bowl XI.
778
00:58:30,016 --> 00:58:32,109
Hey, you are a genius.
779
00:58:32,285 --> 00:58:36,517
Thanks. Problem is we don't have
a tailback.
780
00:58:38,291 --> 00:58:41,488
Listen, what if you tried this?
781
00:58:41,661 --> 00:58:43,856
You know what this is called?
782
00:58:45,865 --> 00:58:47,457
Intimidation.
783
00:58:47,800 --> 00:58:48,960
Cool.
784
00:58:49,969 --> 00:58:52,460
Now, tomorrow,
when you go to the game...
785
00:58:52,638 --> 00:58:56,472
...you don't want to be intimidated.
So let me see your game faces.
786
00:58:58,644 --> 00:59:01,044
No, no. You can do better than that.
787
00:59:01,213 --> 00:59:03,044
Let me see your game faces.
788
00:59:05,985 --> 00:59:07,816
Try this.
789
00:59:09,288 --> 00:59:10,915
You're getting it.
790
00:59:11,157 --> 00:59:13,318
That's it, guys. Now come and get me.
791
00:59:21,834 --> 00:59:23,893
- Mind if I ask you something?
- Yeah.
792
00:59:24,070 --> 00:59:27,562
I got kind of a big game coming up.
You got any advice?
793
00:59:27,740 --> 00:59:30,504
- Good luck.
- What, that's it?
794
00:59:30,676 --> 00:59:33,008
- Later.
- See you, Steve. Bye, Emmitt.
795
00:59:33,179 --> 00:59:34,669
- Have a good trip.
- Thanks.
796
00:59:34,847 --> 00:59:39,841
There's no big secret to winning football.
It's doing what these guys do every game.
797
00:59:40,086 --> 00:59:42,350
Just go out and give it your best.
798
00:59:42,855 --> 00:59:46,416
Bottom line, I took a team
to a Super Bowl, and we won.
799
00:59:46,592 --> 00:59:49,959
I even had some guys on that team
that nobody wanted.
800
00:59:50,196 --> 00:59:52,926
But we were a team,
and that's what you guys are.
801
00:59:53,099 --> 00:59:57,593
You're a football team. That's like
a family, except you get to hit each other.
802
00:59:57,770 --> 01:00:02,230
But you have to stick together.
Do that, and you'll be fine.
803
01:00:02,408 --> 01:00:03,739
Thanks, Mr. Madden.
804
01:00:03,909 --> 01:00:06,377
- Thanks, Mr. Madden.
- See you!
805
01:00:06,545 --> 01:00:09,275
Let me tell you people something.
806
01:00:09,448 --> 01:00:11,882
This ain't just a football.
807
01:00:12,385 --> 01:00:17,448
This is your hopes, your dreams,
your ambitions, your soul in a roll.
808
01:00:17,623 --> 01:00:19,454
It's your life.
809
01:00:19,625 --> 01:00:24,494
Tomorrow on that field,
it's do or die. Win or cry!
810
01:00:24,663 --> 01:00:26,722
Go, baby! Go!
811
01:00:27,633 --> 01:00:31,626
Men, tonight when you go home,
I want you to brush your little teeth.
812
01:00:31,804 --> 01:00:33,897
I want you to wash your little faces.
813
01:00:34,073 --> 01:00:37,065
And I want you to dream
of football glory...
814
01:00:37,243 --> 01:00:42,237
...because tomorrow, we're gonna crush
the Little Giants into smithereens.
815
01:00:42,415 --> 01:00:44,315
- What do you say, men?
- Yeah!
816
01:00:44,483 --> 01:00:45,472
Yeah!
817
01:01:07,173 --> 01:01:08,470
- Guess who.
- Who?
818
01:01:08,641 --> 01:01:09,835
- Me.
- Hey, Junior.
819
01:01:10,009 --> 01:01:15,606
Hey, that's disgusting. It looks like they're
trying to swallow each other's heads.
820
01:01:15,781 --> 01:01:17,373
They're doing it all wrong.
821
01:01:17,550 --> 01:01:22,146
You have to move your head dramatic, like
Kevin Costner in Robin Hood. Like this.
822
01:01:22,321 --> 01:01:26,189
No. In movies, they do that
chicken-pecking, mouth half-open thing.
823
01:01:26,358 --> 01:01:29,122
Like this. "Hey, baby."
824
01:01:30,129 --> 01:01:32,120
No.
825
01:01:32,298 --> 01:01:37,497
Check this out. My cousin told me that
her and her boyfriend use their tongues.
826
01:01:38,204 --> 01:01:41,037
- That's disgusting.
- I know. Spit swappers.
827
01:01:41,207 --> 01:01:45,200
- Yeah, kind of like them.
- Tonsil hockey.
828
01:01:48,714 --> 01:01:51,979
You know the only problem
with kissing your own hand is?
829
01:01:52,151 --> 01:01:53,140
What?
830
01:01:53,319 --> 01:01:56,550
- It doesn't kiss back.
- You wanna learn how to kiss?
831
01:01:56,722 --> 01:02:00,317
- I didn't say that. Do you?
- No. I just got that vomit taste.
832
01:02:00,493 --> 01:02:03,155
Hey, we'll have to learn
how sooner or later...
833
01:02:03,329 --> 01:02:06,230
...I mean, if you wanna have kids
and get a job.
834
01:02:06,398 --> 01:02:09,595
- You can have kids without kissing.
- You can't get a job.
835
01:02:09,768 --> 01:02:12,999
Well, I'll become a teacher.
836
01:02:13,339 --> 01:02:17,935
But what if you were forced to?
Wouldn't it be good to learn with a friend?
837
01:02:18,511 --> 01:02:21,344
You know, for scientific purposes.
838
01:02:21,514 --> 01:02:26,417
No way! If I had to learn how to kiss,
and I mean absolutely, positively...
839
01:02:26,585 --> 01:02:32,080
...no way out of it, no matter what, can't
get out of it, I had to learn how to kiss...
840
01:02:32,258 --> 01:02:36,092
Well then, I think I'd want
to learn with...
841
01:02:36,262 --> 01:02:38,594
Let me guess.
842
01:02:39,265 --> 01:02:42,359
- Debbie.
- I don't know.
843
01:02:42,535 --> 01:02:46,938
But if not her, definitely another
cheerleader-type, right?
844
01:02:47,106 --> 01:02:50,371
Maybe. I don't know.
845
01:02:50,543 --> 01:02:52,773
Look, this is really weird.
846
01:02:53,546 --> 01:02:55,707
Hey, Junior.
847
01:02:56,549 --> 01:02:59,609
If I was like a cheerleader,
you'd wanna learn with me.
848
01:02:59,952 --> 01:03:02,944
But you're not. You're different.
849
01:03:03,122 --> 01:03:05,420
You're cool. You're the Icebox.
850
01:03:05,591 --> 01:03:09,891
Come on, you're probably the only girl
I've met that can beat up my dad.
851
01:03:11,964 --> 01:03:14,558
Anyways, I'll see you later.
852
01:03:34,987 --> 01:03:37,478
- Hey.
- Hey, Uncle Kev.
853
01:03:37,656 --> 01:03:41,023
Is Aunt Karen home?
854
01:03:47,933 --> 01:03:49,798
Come on in, buddy.
855
01:03:53,939 --> 01:03:55,566
Oh, no, you don't. You can't.
856
01:03:55,741 --> 01:03:59,040
This team has come too far
to be shot down on a lousy call.
857
01:03:59,345 --> 01:04:02,712
Watch the grabbing, zebra.
They're giving him the business.
858
01:04:02,881 --> 01:04:05,782
What? You're throwing me out?
I'll throw you out.
859
01:04:05,951 --> 01:04:07,851
I'll throw your mother out.
860
01:04:08,020 --> 01:04:10,511
- Hi, Dad.
- Hey.
861
01:04:10,689 --> 01:04:13,658
- Bye, Dad.
- Hang on. What do you got, a victory cake?
862
01:04:13,826 --> 01:04:16,693
- Half that team's allergic to chocolate.
- It's not a cake.
863
01:04:16,862 --> 01:04:19,797
You can't sneak away
without telling me what it is.
864
01:04:19,965 --> 01:04:21,364
It's nothing.
865
01:04:21,533 --> 01:04:24,468
Okay. If my little fullback
wants to surprise me...
866
01:04:24,637 --> 01:04:27,128
...that's all right with me.
867
01:04:28,307 --> 01:04:30,366
Little fullback?
868
01:04:30,542 --> 01:04:32,533
Your little fullback?
869
01:04:32,878 --> 01:04:36,245
That's all I am to you, isn't it?
Your little fullback.
870
01:04:37,149 --> 01:04:40,050
Your ticket to beating Kevin
and winning the game.
871
01:04:40,386 --> 01:04:41,717
Becky, what's wrong?
872
01:04:42,221 --> 01:04:44,815
What's wrong? Everything's wrong.
873
01:04:44,990 --> 01:04:48,687
Do you know what Mom used to call me?
Her little princess.
874
01:04:48,861 --> 01:04:52,194
When she tucked me in she'd go,
"Good night, little princess."
875
01:04:52,364 --> 01:04:54,628
Then she'd kiss me on my cheeks.
876
01:04:54,800 --> 01:04:57,997
Then she'd pull the covers all around me.
877
01:04:58,671 --> 01:05:00,536
And you remember that?
878
01:05:01,073 --> 01:05:02,233
Yeah.
879
01:05:02,408 --> 01:05:04,501
She wouldn't let me play football.
880
01:05:04,677 --> 01:05:08,010
She wouldn't call me
her little fullback either.
881
01:05:08,681 --> 01:05:12,947
Becky, look, Mom's not here anymore.
She left us.
882
01:05:13,252 --> 01:05:15,686
- She quit.
- No!
883
01:05:15,854 --> 01:05:19,017
She didn't quit. She just found
a better team.
884
01:05:19,391 --> 01:05:21,518
I'm not playing tomorrow.
885
01:05:21,694 --> 01:05:26,358
This was your idea. This game was the
most important thing in the world to you.
886
01:05:26,532 --> 01:05:32,027
No, Dad, this game means everything
in the world to you.
887
01:06:01,800 --> 01:06:05,236
Come on, Dad. Throw it in here.
888
01:06:16,815 --> 01:06:20,649
Come on, fellas. Tomorrow's the big one.
Don't let me down.
889
01:06:20,819 --> 01:06:24,619
You want intimidation?
I'll show you intimidation.
890
01:06:47,946 --> 01:06:50,779
I'll be back in a few days.
891
01:06:50,949 --> 01:06:53,110
Be good.
892
01:07:02,294 --> 01:07:05,627
- You get a good night's sleep.
- Don't think about football.
893
01:07:05,798 --> 01:07:08,358
I won't, Daddy.
894
01:07:14,206 --> 01:07:16,299
Three.
895
01:07:17,309 --> 01:07:19,709
Four.
896
01:07:20,312 --> 01:07:22,712
Five.
897
01:07:23,215 --> 01:07:25,547
Six.
898
01:07:26,051 --> 01:07:28,986
Seven. Eight.
899
01:07:35,727 --> 01:07:38,924
I want to pump you up.
900
01:08:08,694 --> 01:08:15,099
Good night, Urbania. And a special
good luck to all tomorrow's players.
901
01:08:44,396 --> 01:08:46,455
Well, hello again, everybody.
902
01:08:46,632 --> 01:08:50,068
This is Cliff Parson,
your play-by-play announcer.
903
01:08:50,235 --> 01:08:53,068
What a day it is.
We're at Kevin O'Shea Stadium...
904
01:08:53,238 --> 01:08:55,433
...located in pastoral Urbania, Ohio...
905
01:08:55,607 --> 01:08:58,667
...scene of what's become known
as "Mania in Urbania."
906
01:09:00,112 --> 01:09:02,239
Yeah, let's go.
907
01:09:04,483 --> 01:09:06,781
Now shake it up.
908
01:09:07,319 --> 01:09:10,083
Guys, quiet down! Hold it.
909
01:09:10,255 --> 01:09:14,157
Father Kelly is kind enough
to say a prayer for our victory today.
910
01:09:14,326 --> 01:09:15,418
Yeah!
911
01:09:15,594 --> 01:09:16,754
Pipe down!
912
01:09:16,929 --> 01:09:19,864
All right. Quiet down for chrissake!
913
01:09:21,166 --> 01:09:22,929
Hey, shut up!
914
01:09:25,437 --> 01:09:27,268
Go ahead, Father.
915
01:09:27,439 --> 01:09:33,503
As we are about to embark on this journey
of athletic competition...
916
01:09:33,679 --> 01:09:37,171
...we pause to reflect.
It is not whether you win or lose...
917
01:09:37,349 --> 01:09:39,681
Giants! Giants! Giants!
918
01:09:39,851 --> 01:09:40,875
What the hell?
919
01:09:41,053 --> 01:09:44,648
Giants! Giants! Giants! Giants!
920
01:09:44,823 --> 01:09:48,486
Giants! Giants! Giants! Giants!
921
01:09:48,961 --> 01:09:50,861
Let's kill them! Come on!
922
01:09:51,029 --> 01:09:52,326
They don't respect you!
923
01:09:54,533 --> 01:09:57,696
Hey, Briggs, you big snot-ball,
I'll eat you for lunch!
924
01:10:00,639 --> 01:10:03,472
All right. All right. All right. Guys, cool it.
925
01:10:03,642 --> 01:10:07,476
One sec, coach. Paging Spike the putz!
926
01:10:07,646 --> 01:10:10,137
Hey, hey! Hang on, son.
What's the matter?
927
01:10:10,315 --> 01:10:13,682
That's right, Spike!
Icebox is gonna defrost you!
928
01:10:13,852 --> 01:10:16,150
You're getting fired up?
929
01:10:16,321 --> 01:10:18,050
Yeah, there you go, son.
930
01:10:18,223 --> 01:10:21,192
Save that rage!
Uncork it on the first person you hit.
931
01:10:22,694 --> 01:10:25,492
All right. All right. All right.
Enough of that.
932
01:10:25,664 --> 01:10:28,224
- Relax, coach.
- We're unstoppable!
933
01:10:28,400 --> 01:10:29,924
Yeah!
934
01:10:30,836 --> 01:10:31,928
Hi, guys.
935
01:10:34,072 --> 01:10:35,664
Becky?
936
01:10:35,841 --> 01:10:39,743
Look, I just came by to wish you
good luck and have a great game.
937
01:10:40,345 --> 01:10:42,677
I'll be rooting for you.
938
01:10:47,252 --> 01:10:49,447
All right. Everything's gonna be okay.
939
01:10:49,621 --> 01:10:51,714
- Let's talk strategy, guys.
- Strategy?
940
01:10:51,890 --> 01:10:54,518
Without Becky, we're gonna be
Cream of Wheat.
941
01:10:54,693 --> 01:10:58,857
Without Icebox, Spike's gonna rip off
my face and wear it on Halloween.
942
01:10:59,031 --> 01:11:02,933
I'm leaving the country.
I'm going to New Mexico.
943
01:11:03,769 --> 01:11:06,033
Guys, wait. I got something to show you.
944
01:11:06,204 --> 01:11:07,466
- What?
- What is it?
945
01:11:12,044 --> 01:11:13,375
Death shrouds.
946
01:11:15,047 --> 01:11:16,571
Your name's on the back.
947
01:11:16,748 --> 01:11:21,879
So the guys at the morgue
can identify the bodies.
948
01:11:34,900 --> 01:11:39,132
Hold up! Gentlemen...
949
01:11:39,971 --> 01:11:41,734
...this ain't just a football.
950
01:11:41,907 --> 01:11:43,238
It's our lives!
951
01:11:43,408 --> 01:11:45,433
Show them what we have!
952
01:11:45,644 --> 01:11:48,807
Here come the Cowboys!
953
01:11:52,084 --> 01:11:54,609
Let's go, guys. Come on.
954
01:11:54,786 --> 01:11:57,277
Okay? Here we go. All right!
955
01:12:10,102 --> 01:12:13,765
Okay. Remember, guys,
this is just a football...
956
01:12:13,939 --> 01:12:15,873
...just air and pig intestines.
957
01:12:17,542 --> 01:12:19,772
All right. Come on.
Let's get out there.
958
01:12:33,625 --> 01:12:36,492
I can't see with this thing on!
959
01:12:42,934 --> 01:12:45,198
Is this on? Is this...?
960
01:12:45,370 --> 01:12:47,861
Great to see you, folks.
Welcome to the park.
961
01:12:48,039 --> 01:12:53,067
Today, Kevin's peewee Cowboys
are gonna test their mini-muscles...
962
01:12:53,245 --> 01:12:55,338
... against Danny's Little Giants.
963
01:12:55,514 --> 01:12:57,106
Little Giants, nice touch.
964
01:12:57,282 --> 01:12:59,147
- I thought you'd like that.
- Guys.
965
01:12:59,317 --> 01:13:00,443
Kevin, you call it.
966
01:13:00,619 --> 01:13:03,281
- Heads.
- Excuse me. How come he gets to call it?
967
01:13:03,455 --> 01:13:07,050
What's the difference?
You kick off, we ram it down your throat.
968
01:13:07,225 --> 01:13:10,683
We kick off, take it from you,
then ram it down your throat.
969
01:13:10,862 --> 01:13:14,320
You've been bossing me around
since we were kids. Stop it.
970
01:13:14,499 --> 01:13:16,933
You don't ask for things. You take them.
971
01:13:17,102 --> 01:13:19,696
Like you took my ticket
to that World Series?
972
01:13:19,871 --> 01:13:22,066
Guys, cut it out. You're brothers.
973
01:13:22,240 --> 01:13:25,004
- Not by choice.
- I don't have to take that...
974
01:13:25,177 --> 01:13:28,669
...from a guy who sunk
his last dime into a broken gas station.
975
01:13:28,847 --> 01:13:32,374
It's been servicing this community
for over 40 years.
976
01:13:32,551 --> 01:13:35,418
- It's a landmark.
- Ought to be a landfill.
977
01:13:35,587 --> 01:13:38,750
You don't know anything
about loyalty or heart.
978
01:13:38,924 --> 01:13:42,690
I would put that gas station
up against any business in this town.
979
01:13:42,861 --> 01:13:44,192
- You sure?
- Yes, I am.
980
01:13:44,362 --> 01:13:46,762
- Okay, fine.
- Okay, fine.
981
01:13:46,932 --> 01:13:48,456
What are we talking about?
982
01:13:48,934 --> 01:13:53,268
My car dealership against your gas station,
winner of this game takes it all.
983
01:13:53,438 --> 01:13:54,928
- You're on.
- Fine.
984
01:13:55,106 --> 01:13:58,269
I'll even let you call it. Open up your fist.
985
01:13:58,443 --> 01:14:00,934
- Heads.
- Tails.
986
01:14:01,112 --> 01:14:05,412
- This will be the longest day of your life.
- We'll see about that.
987
01:14:05,951 --> 01:14:07,043
What am I doing?
988
01:14:07,219 --> 01:14:10,382
Cowboys! Cowboys!
Win, win, win!
989
01:14:10,555 --> 01:14:14,150
- Giants! Giants!
- Help us, God!
990
01:14:16,928 --> 01:14:18,896
Let's make something happen.
991
01:14:21,933 --> 01:14:26,461
Giants kicking off. They'll defend
the western goal to my right, your left.
992
01:14:49,294 --> 01:14:50,283
Go!
993
01:14:50,462 --> 01:14:53,920
All right, guys. All right.
Kicking is the key to this game.
994
01:15:00,438 --> 01:15:03,999
Somebody's holding a pound of Aunt
Betty's nut butter. It's a live ball!
995
01:15:04,175 --> 01:15:06,268
Cowboys recover.
996
01:15:14,986 --> 01:15:16,954
That was easy.
997
01:15:19,324 --> 01:15:21,224
l-formation right, 32 dive on go.
998
01:15:21,393 --> 01:15:23,122
Ready. Break!
999
01:15:23,295 --> 01:15:25,286
When I get finished with you...
1000
01:15:25,463 --> 01:15:28,398
...you'll fart out your mouth
and talk out your butt.
1001
01:15:28,800 --> 01:15:30,461
Is that physically possible?
1002
01:15:30,635 --> 01:15:31,693
Down!
1003
01:15:32,804 --> 01:15:33,862
Set!
1004
01:15:34,039 --> 01:15:35,233
Go!
1005
01:15:40,979 --> 01:15:44,073
- All right. All right.
- That's my boy!
1006
01:15:47,552 --> 01:15:49,019
Are you all right?
1007
01:15:49,220 --> 01:15:50,244
I think so.
1008
01:15:50,555 --> 01:15:53,183
I guess it is possible.
1009
01:15:53,358 --> 01:15:55,053
Go!
1010
01:16:03,969 --> 01:16:06,301
Way to hold him.
1011
01:16:12,344 --> 01:16:14,505
Dead meat.
1012
01:16:16,147 --> 01:16:17,409
Go!
1013
01:16:24,689 --> 01:16:26,452
Stay with him. Come on.
1014
01:16:33,598 --> 01:16:36,431
Touchdown, Cowboys!
1015
01:16:39,904 --> 01:16:43,067
This isn't American Gladiators.
That was a cheap shot.
1016
01:16:43,274 --> 01:16:45,105
No penalty. No penalty.
1017
01:16:49,314 --> 01:16:53,478
Did I pass the spelling test, Mrs. Greely?
1018
01:16:53,852 --> 01:16:58,482
Wow. Spike knocked him all the way back
to second grade.
1019
01:17:09,467 --> 01:17:12,698
- Okay, three little pigs on go. Ready.
- Wait.
1020
01:17:12,871 --> 01:17:16,068
- What's the three little pigs?
- Here.
1021
01:17:16,241 --> 01:17:21,338
Look. We're lined up strong left. Zolteck,
watch Murphy coming through the hole.
1022
01:17:21,679 --> 01:17:23,943
- Ready.
- Break!
1023
01:17:28,887 --> 01:17:31,117
Down!
1024
01:17:31,289 --> 01:17:34,315
Set! Go!
1025
01:17:37,195 --> 01:17:40,130
Blow the whistle! Blow the whistle!
1026
01:17:40,298 --> 01:17:44,462
Blow the whistle! Come on. Blow it!
Blow it!
1027
01:17:45,170 --> 01:17:48,037
Tad, you're going the wrong way.
1028
01:17:48,273 --> 01:17:51,436
Blow the whistle! Come on!
Blow the whistle! Blow it.
1029
01:17:51,609 --> 01:17:53,167
Blow it!
1030
01:17:56,748 --> 01:17:57,874
All right.
1031
01:17:58,149 --> 01:17:59,776
Down!
1032
01:18:00,385 --> 01:18:03,115
Set! Hut!
1033
01:18:17,302 --> 01:18:20,328
I should have gone to summer school.
1034
01:18:45,830 --> 01:18:48,765
Okay. Hanon, I want you to run
a bear trap curl...
1035
01:18:48,933 --> 01:18:51,902
...and try to catch the ball.
- No problem.
1036
01:18:52,070 --> 01:18:55,870
- Okay, guys. On two. Ready.
- Break!
1037
01:19:04,182 --> 01:19:05,843
Down!
1038
01:19:07,118 --> 01:19:10,610
Set! Go! Go! Go!
1039
01:19:23,902 --> 01:19:27,065
Hey, Hot Hands.
You're the best player on our team.
1040
01:19:30,441 --> 01:19:32,568
- Ready.
- Break!
1041
01:19:33,912 --> 01:19:35,277
Gonna rip your head off.
1042
01:19:37,515 --> 01:19:39,176
Down!
1043
01:19:40,318 --> 01:19:41,808
Set!
1044
01:19:42,320 --> 01:19:44,720
Go! Go! Go! Go!
1045
01:19:48,560 --> 01:19:54,226
Hammersmith dives on the ball in the
end zone. Touchdown, Cowboys!
1046
01:19:54,866 --> 01:19:57,460
I can't see with this thing on!
1047
01:19:57,635 --> 01:20:02,436
That's the end of your first half.
The score: Cowboys 21, Giants nothing.
1048
01:20:02,607 --> 01:20:06,771
- I'm not finished with you, Zol-fart.
- Have a nice halftime, girls.
1049
01:20:06,945 --> 01:20:10,142
Look at my back. Is my spine sticking out
through my uniform?
1050
01:20:10,481 --> 01:20:14,349
- It's hard to tell.
- I've lost feeling in the back of my leg.
1051
01:20:14,519 --> 01:20:16,578
- Maybe it's asleep.
- Nobody wake it.
1052
01:20:16,754 --> 01:20:21,157
- Hanon, call 911.
- I can't. My fingers are stuck together.
1053
01:20:21,359 --> 01:20:25,762
Hey, Danny, this thing's gone far enough.
Let's call it off, huh?
1054
01:20:25,930 --> 01:20:28,490
- It's not over.
- It's not over. You're sure?
1055
01:20:28,666 --> 01:20:29,963
It's halftime.
1056
01:20:30,134 --> 01:20:35,037
Okay, kid. Hey, there'll always be a job
for you at the full-service pumps.
1057
01:20:47,585 --> 01:20:50,019
Okay, guys. Listen up. We still got a shot.
1058
01:20:50,188 --> 01:20:52,850
A couple things go differently for us,
we're in it.
1059
01:20:53,358 --> 01:20:56,122
- We can do it.
- We really creamed them by showing up.
1060
01:20:56,294 --> 01:21:00,321
We quit. So call us if you decide
to coach softball.
1061
01:21:00,898 --> 01:21:04,299
- What about the second half?
- Tell them we can't come out.
1062
01:21:06,204 --> 01:21:09,765
- Put us on the injured list.
- Yeah.
1063
01:21:22,687 --> 01:21:26,521
You know, there's something
you guys should know.
1064
01:21:26,691 --> 01:21:30,593
When I was 10 years old,
I put myself on the injured list.
1065
01:21:32,797 --> 01:21:36,255
- I never got off.
- Why?
1066
01:21:36,434 --> 01:21:40,996
Because I didn't get picked a few times.
So I started hiding under the bleachers.
1067
01:21:41,306 --> 01:21:43,774
That's where we belong,
under the bleachers.
1068
01:21:43,941 --> 01:21:45,340
No, you don't.
1069
01:21:45,510 --> 01:21:48,104
You guys belong out there
with those Cowboys.
1070
01:21:48,279 --> 01:21:51,942
You know how I know that?
Because I belong out there with my brother.
1071
01:21:52,116 --> 01:21:55,449
Give us a break. You couldn't beat
Kevin O'Shea at anything.
1072
01:21:55,620 --> 01:21:59,579
- No, that's not true. I did beat him once.
- When?
1073
01:22:00,391 --> 01:22:04,725
When we were kids. We used to race
our bikes down Cherry Hill after school.
1074
01:22:04,896 --> 01:22:07,490
We'd race every day,
and he always beat me.
1075
01:22:07,665 --> 01:22:11,260
But one time, one time, I beat him.
1076
01:22:11,469 --> 01:22:16,429
- You beat Kevin down Cherry Hill?
- Yes, I did. He ate my dust.
1077
01:22:16,874 --> 01:22:19,968
- Big deal. One time.
- You know...
1078
01:22:20,144 --> 01:22:24,638
...one time, at Randy Cooper's swim party,
I did a back flip off the high dive.
1079
01:22:24,816 --> 01:22:29,753
- And my brother chickened out.
- Roger chickened out? He's a Marine.
1080
01:22:29,921 --> 01:22:32,913
Oh, that's nothing.
One time, at a Spring Carnival...
1081
01:22:33,091 --> 01:22:35,753
...I beat both my brothers
in the cow-dung toss.
1082
01:22:35,927 --> 01:22:38,657
You beat Matt and Brad in the turd toss?
1083
01:22:38,896 --> 01:22:41,490
One time, I went fishing
with my entire family.
1084
01:22:41,666 --> 01:22:44,191
I was the only one that didn't throw up.
1085
01:22:44,369 --> 01:22:47,338
So what?
That doesn't make us good football players.
1086
01:22:47,638 --> 01:22:51,472
Wait a second, guys. Who said
you had to be good to play football?
1087
01:22:51,642 --> 01:22:53,837
You play football because you want to.
1088
01:22:54,145 --> 01:22:55,942
You play because it's fun.
1089
01:22:56,147 --> 01:22:59,139
You play so you can pretend
you're Joe Montana...
1090
01:22:59,317 --> 01:23:03,276
...throwing a touchdown pass
or Emmitt Smith going for a long run.
1091
01:23:03,454 --> 01:23:06,446
And even if those Cowboys are better
than you guys...
1092
01:23:06,624 --> 01:23:10,492
...even if they beat you 99 times
out of 100...
1093
01:23:10,661 --> 01:23:13,357
...that still leaves...
- One time.
1094
01:23:13,731 --> 01:23:17,895
- One time.
- Yeah. One time.
1095
01:23:21,038 --> 01:23:25,338
- Stop! Who are we?
- Giants!
1096
01:23:32,450 --> 01:23:36,511
- I just told the mayor you forfeited.
- You give the mayor a message for me.
1097
01:23:36,687 --> 01:23:38,951
Tell him not to bet on the Cowboys.
1098
01:23:39,123 --> 01:23:40,385
- You forget one thing.
- What?
1099
01:23:40,558 --> 01:23:44,392
- That's my field.
- Yeah, well, we got the ball.
1100
01:23:45,696 --> 01:23:48,062
Come on. All right.
1101
01:23:57,942 --> 01:24:00,274
Okay, guys. All right. Here we go.
1102
01:24:00,478 --> 01:24:02,844
- Go, Spike.
- All right. Let's hit somebody.
1103
01:24:03,014 --> 01:24:04,948
Break!
1104
01:24:07,251 --> 01:24:09,811
They're gonna have to put you in a body bag.
1105
01:24:10,221 --> 01:24:13,713
- Prepare to eat grass.
- Pig breath, you're in big trouble.
1106
01:24:13,925 --> 01:24:19,090
- How come?
- Football's 80%% mental and 40%% physical.
1107
01:24:19,263 --> 01:24:20,890
- Set. Go!
- What?
1108
01:24:31,742 --> 01:24:33,767
Hey, guys, look!
1109
01:24:34,912 --> 01:24:38,040
- Second and nine.
- They gained a yard!
1110
01:24:40,585 --> 01:24:42,746
We got one yard.
1111
01:24:45,790 --> 01:24:47,451
One yard.
1112
01:24:47,859 --> 01:24:49,417
Don't mean nothing.
1113
01:24:49,827 --> 01:24:51,556
Down!
1114
01:24:51,729 --> 01:24:54,129
Set! Go!
1115
01:24:59,537 --> 01:25:03,234
Flea-flicker to Floyd. He's got
room up the sideline, the 45, the 50.
1116
01:25:09,146 --> 01:25:13,105
First down, Giants, on their longest gain
of the afternoon.
1117
01:25:13,317 --> 01:25:15,376
What kind of defense is that? Come on.
1118
01:25:15,553 --> 01:25:17,544
All right. Great. Great stuff.
1119
01:25:17,722 --> 01:25:22,284
Giants, Giants, first and 10
Giants, Giants
1120
01:25:22,560 --> 01:25:26,257
Okay, listen up. What would be the last thing
they'd expect us to do?
1121
01:25:27,131 --> 01:25:31,261
- A reverse to me?
- Down!
1122
01:25:31,802 --> 01:25:35,101
Set! Go!
1123
01:25:37,341 --> 01:25:39,673
I'm gonna die. I'm gonna die.
1124
01:25:39,844 --> 01:25:42,312
- Come on, Tad!
- I'm gonna die!
1125
01:25:42,480 --> 01:25:44,971
Tad! Go! Go! Run out of bounds!
1126
01:25:50,087 --> 01:25:51,611
Tad! Run!
1127
01:26:00,831 --> 01:26:02,696
Go! Go!
1128
01:26:04,769 --> 01:26:07,169
We scored! We scored a touchdown!
1129
01:26:07,371 --> 01:26:09,805
Touchdown, Giants!
1130
01:26:12,043 --> 01:26:14,807
Oh, my God! My son scored a touchdown.
1131
01:26:40,605 --> 01:26:44,632
Down. Set. Go!
1132
01:26:55,219 --> 01:26:58,154
Yes. I've done it.
1133
01:27:12,770 --> 01:27:15,534
All right, Spike.
We're not taking any chances.
1134
01:27:15,706 --> 01:27:20,040
Either take Junior Floyd out of the game
or you donate a kidney to Aunt Ruth.
1135
01:27:20,211 --> 01:27:23,112
- Yes, sir!
- Okay. Come on. Get going.
1136
01:27:41,465 --> 01:27:46,027
- Personal foul, number 32, white.
- Are you crazy? What kind of call is that?
1137
01:27:46,203 --> 01:27:49,934
Hey. That wasn't very nice, you big bully.
1138
01:27:50,107 --> 01:27:54,441
If that kid of yours pulls another stunt
like that, you're both out of here.
1139
01:27:54,612 --> 01:27:59,242
- Hey, I thought you wanted to win.
- Not like that.
1140
01:28:28,913 --> 01:28:31,347
- Hi.
- Sure you want to do this, Becky?
1141
01:28:31,515 --> 01:28:34,450
- Call me Icebox.
- Hey, Icebox.
1142
01:28:34,618 --> 01:28:36,415
Kick some butt.
1143
01:28:38,656 --> 01:28:40,146
Call me Becky.
1144
01:28:49,800 --> 01:28:53,497
- What's that cheerleader doing?
- It's no cheerleader. That's my niece.
1145
01:28:53,671 --> 01:28:54,968
And she's pissed.
1146
01:28:55,139 --> 01:28:56,663
Break!
1147
01:28:59,110 --> 01:29:02,978
Keep clear, Ice Chest,
or I'll have to mess up your face.
1148
01:29:04,882 --> 01:29:08,841
Two, fifty-six. Two, fifty-six.
1149
01:29:09,019 --> 01:29:12,386
Two, fifty-six. Down!
1150
01:29:12,656 --> 01:29:15,625
Set! Go!
1151
01:29:26,470 --> 01:29:31,305
What a hit by Becky O'Shea.
The ball is loose. Hanon tightly covers it up.
1152
01:29:31,509 --> 01:29:34,034
Yes! All right! That's my girl!
1153
01:29:34,211 --> 01:29:36,042
Yeah.
1154
01:29:36,213 --> 01:29:37,703
No!
1155
01:29:40,584 --> 01:29:42,313
- Let it go, man.
- Get away.
1156
01:29:43,120 --> 01:29:46,556
I got it! I got it! I got it!
1157
01:29:56,600 --> 01:29:58,693
Zolteck! Come here.
1158
01:29:59,203 --> 01:30:04,800
- You rang?
- Chicken little flea-flicker on two. Take it.
1159
01:30:06,610 --> 01:30:10,341
- Okay. Chicken little flea-flicker on two.
- What's that?
1160
01:30:10,614 --> 01:30:12,013
It's a pitch to Johnny.
1161
01:30:12,516 --> 01:30:16,919
Pitch to Johnny?
You can't pitch to Johnny. I'm Johnny!
1162
01:30:17,087 --> 01:30:19,681
Zolteck, he's gonna need some running room.
1163
01:30:19,990 --> 01:30:21,355
Got you.
1164
01:30:21,525 --> 01:30:24,961
- Break!
- Excuse me, guys! Guys, come on!
1165
01:30:26,630 --> 01:30:31,727
Excuse me. Maybe you can help me.
I'm trying to remember what I had for lunch.
1166
01:30:31,969 --> 01:30:35,632
- How can we do that?
- By taking a whiff of this.
1167
01:30:37,875 --> 01:30:39,433
Hut. Hut two.
1168
01:30:41,579 --> 01:30:44,810
- Now what?
- Just run to him.
1169
01:30:46,250 --> 01:30:48,115
Dad?
1170
01:30:48,686 --> 01:30:50,779
Dad!
1171
01:30:50,955 --> 01:30:52,217
Dad!
1172
01:30:58,429 --> 01:31:00,260
Dad!
1173
01:31:01,398 --> 01:31:03,525
Dad!
1174
01:31:07,171 --> 01:31:08,468
Dad!
1175
01:31:09,373 --> 01:31:12,501
Touchdown! The Giants deficit
is cut in half...
1176
01:31:12,676 --> 01:31:15,270
...on brilliant running by Johnny Vennaro.
1177
01:31:17,915 --> 01:31:22,477
- Line up. Let's go. Get the guys over here.
- We're out there. Let's go to kick off.
1178
01:31:25,089 --> 01:31:26,647
Down!
1179
01:31:26,824 --> 01:31:29,816
Set! Go!
1180
01:31:36,300 --> 01:31:40,327
- Clear it out. Let's go.
- All right, guys. Way to go.
1181
01:31:40,504 --> 01:31:42,802
What's the matter, four-eyes?
1182
01:31:42,973 --> 01:31:45,134
Want your mama?
1183
01:31:45,809 --> 01:31:48,141
Don't be talking about my mama.
1184
01:31:49,380 --> 01:31:53,373
Watching Jake play football
has really been great for my family.
1185
01:31:53,550 --> 01:31:54,608
Yeah.
1186
01:31:54,785 --> 01:31:57,652
Down. Set. Go!
1187
01:32:02,927 --> 01:32:06,363
Rip their filthy ears off, Jakester!
1188
01:32:08,499 --> 01:32:10,763
Yes! Yes!
1189
01:32:17,675 --> 01:32:22,476
- I use these for acid indigestion.
- So what are we gonna use these for?
1190
01:32:22,646 --> 01:32:24,341
Intimidation.
1191
01:32:27,318 --> 01:32:28,808
Break!
1192
01:32:41,165 --> 01:32:42,894
Go.
1193
01:32:46,170 --> 01:32:49,264
What's the matter with you?
You gonna play or what?
1194
01:32:49,773 --> 01:32:53,903
Okay. I've got the play.
Silver streak to Hanon on two.
1195
01:32:54,078 --> 01:32:55,340
Are you sure?
1196
01:32:55,512 --> 01:32:57,844
- Ready.
- Break!
1197
01:32:58,983 --> 01:33:01,474
- Oh, crud.
- Come on.
1198
01:33:02,419 --> 01:33:04,546
Set! Go!
1199
01:33:09,093 --> 01:33:11,118
Pass! Pass! Pass!
1200
01:33:24,942 --> 01:33:26,569
Yeah! That's my boy!
1201
01:33:34,485 --> 01:33:36,214
All right, Hanon!
1202
01:33:36,387 --> 01:33:37,649
Touchdown!
1203
01:33:37,821 --> 01:33:40,119
- Wrong defense!
- I didn't call the blitz!
1204
01:33:45,129 --> 01:33:47,996
With 1:45 left and the score tied
21 to 21...
1205
01:33:48,165 --> 01:33:52,158
...it looks like Mr. Momentum
may be changing his address.
1206
01:33:52,336 --> 01:33:53,667
All right, men. Let's go.
1207
01:33:55,005 --> 01:33:56,802
Down!
1208
01:33:57,141 --> 01:33:58,802
Set!
1209
01:33:59,309 --> 01:34:01,106
Go!
1210
01:34:06,750 --> 01:34:09,583
- Get off of me.
- You're mine.
1211
01:34:11,755 --> 01:34:13,882
All right. All right.
1212
01:34:16,460 --> 01:34:20,726
With less than a minute to play, the
Cowboys are heading for that end zone.
1213
01:34:20,898 --> 01:34:22,661
Set! Go!
1214
01:34:28,472 --> 01:34:30,303
Stick a fork in them. They're done!
1215
01:34:32,409 --> 01:34:34,604
Easy! Easy! One more!
1216
01:34:34,945 --> 01:34:36,105
Come here, son.
1217
01:34:36,280 --> 01:34:39,875
Thirty-eight toss. You understand?
Thirty-eight toss. Let's go.
1218
01:34:43,087 --> 01:34:46,056
Do you remember that
championship game with Sutterville?
1219
01:34:46,223 --> 01:34:49,317
The one where Kevin scored
the winning touchdown?
1220
01:34:50,461 --> 01:34:51,723
Time-out.
1221
01:34:51,895 --> 01:34:56,332
The Giants call a time-out with 10 seconds
left and the ball on the one-yard line.
1222
01:34:57,034 --> 01:34:59,025
Come on, guys. Huddle up.
1223
01:34:59,203 --> 01:35:02,730
Look, no one thought
we'd make it this far.
1224
01:35:02,906 --> 01:35:06,899
But now it's time to really dig in.
They're gonna give the ball to Spike.
1225
01:35:07,077 --> 01:35:09,978
- We've gotta stop him.
- He's too strong.
1226
01:35:10,147 --> 01:35:12,513
We can do it together.
1227
01:35:14,184 --> 01:35:16,709
- Ready.
- Break!
1228
01:35:17,521 --> 01:35:21,321
Hold that line! Hold that line!
Hold that line!
1229
01:35:22,793 --> 01:35:24,226
Set!
1230
01:35:26,864 --> 01:35:28,422
They know the play.
1231
01:35:28,599 --> 01:35:30,692
They know the play.
1232
01:35:33,770 --> 01:35:36,170
Set!
1233
01:35:36,406 --> 01:35:38,431
Go!
1234
01:36:07,171 --> 01:36:09,162
Turn it up!
1235
01:36:15,312 --> 01:36:17,712
- Yes! We're in! Touchdown!
- Yeah!
1236
01:36:17,881 --> 01:36:19,644
- It was over!
- No. We stopped him.
1237
01:36:19,816 --> 01:36:21,374
- He was in.
- No way.
1238
01:36:21,685 --> 01:36:23,949
Move it back. Everybody, off the ball.
1239
01:36:24,121 --> 01:36:25,782
Move back.
1240
01:36:26,290 --> 01:36:27,484
Giants' ball!
1241
01:36:28,091 --> 01:36:29,752
No! No!
1242
01:36:29,927 --> 01:36:31,952
Giants' ball!
1243
01:36:32,129 --> 01:36:33,596
Told you.
1244
01:36:33,764 --> 01:36:35,629
Time-out.
1245
01:36:40,003 --> 01:36:43,097
You did it, guys. You stopped him.
I'm real proud of you.
1246
01:36:43,273 --> 01:36:47,141
- Coach, there's still four seconds left.
- We can beat these guys.
1247
01:36:49,313 --> 01:36:52,043
Put me in, coach!
I wanna kick some butt!
1248
01:36:52,216 --> 01:36:54,514
What kind of play you got for this?
1249
01:36:54,918 --> 01:36:57,580
How about the annexation of Puerto Rico?
1250
01:36:57,754 --> 01:37:02,123
With four seconds left, the Giants
trot onto the field for the final play.
1251
01:37:05,295 --> 01:37:07,957
- Ready.
- One time.
1252
01:37:10,834 --> 01:37:12,597
- Ready.
- Break!
1253
01:37:13,837 --> 01:37:16,169
You're mine, pom-pom.
1254
01:37:17,674 --> 01:37:20,700
- All right.
- Let's go, baby. One more play, baby.
1255
01:37:20,877 --> 01:37:23,072
Watch the wingman.
1256
01:37:28,819 --> 01:37:30,446
Down!
1257
01:37:30,621 --> 01:37:33,181
- Don't let anybody behind you!
- Set!
1258
01:37:37,995 --> 01:37:39,758
Go!
1259
01:37:44,201 --> 01:37:46,965
Reverse! Reverse!
1260
01:37:50,240 --> 01:37:53,676
She doesn't have the ball.
Fumblerooski! Fumblerooski!
1261
01:37:57,147 --> 01:38:01,413
- Yeah! No mercy!
- No ball.
1262
01:38:06,757 --> 01:38:09,055
- Get him!
- He's got the ball!
1263
01:38:21,705 --> 01:38:24,333
I got it. I got it.
1264
01:38:24,508 --> 01:38:26,066
Come on! Come on!
1265
01:38:26,543 --> 01:38:29,944
I'm gonna score a touchdown.
I'm gonna score a touchdown!
1266
01:38:30,113 --> 01:38:32,081
No, you're not.
1267
01:38:37,788 --> 01:38:39,016
Yeah!
1268
01:38:42,359 --> 01:38:45,260
- We won!
- We won!
1269
01:39:05,282 --> 01:39:07,147
We did it! We won!
1270
01:39:07,684 --> 01:39:10,915
- We won! We won! We won!
- We did it!
1271
01:39:11,088 --> 01:39:12,817
We won!
1272
01:39:13,924 --> 01:39:16,984
We won! We won!
1273
01:39:17,994 --> 01:39:19,222
We won!
1274
01:39:22,632 --> 01:39:24,691
Patty Floyd...
1275
01:39:25,335 --> 01:39:29,101
...I was wondering if you'd be interested
in having dinner with me?
1276
01:39:33,009 --> 01:39:35,603
Fine, if you'd like to think about it.
1277
01:39:38,582 --> 01:39:40,675
Get a grip, Dad.
1278
01:39:42,919 --> 01:39:45,649
Yeah! Oh, yeah!
1279
01:39:46,423 --> 01:39:47,856
Yes!
1280
01:39:51,061 --> 01:39:55,964
Giants! Giants! Giants! Giants!
1281
01:39:57,000 --> 01:40:00,197
Congratulations, Danny.
Looks like you're the new head coach.
1282
01:40:00,370 --> 01:40:03,635
If you're pissed at me, don't be.
If I wasn't tough on you...
1283
01:40:03,807 --> 01:40:06,742
...when we were kids,
you never would've beat me today.
1284
01:40:06,910 --> 01:40:11,677
- Okay. Listen, Kev, my guys are wondering...
- They want to tar and feather me in public?
1285
01:40:11,915 --> 01:40:15,783
No. They're wondering if your team
wants to join the Little Giants.
1286
01:40:15,952 --> 01:40:18,182
One town. One team.
1287
01:40:19,156 --> 01:40:21,681
- All right. I'll tell my boys.
- Hey, Kev.
1288
01:40:21,858 --> 01:40:25,055
- Is it possible to have two head coaches?
- No.
1289
01:40:25,228 --> 01:40:29,460
In case the head coach doesn't know
as much about football as the other coach?
1290
01:40:34,871 --> 01:40:37,101
Let me think about it. All right?
1291
01:40:37,274 --> 01:40:39,868
- Deal.
- Danny.
1292
01:40:40,477 --> 01:40:42,911
That bet we made,
you're not holding me to it?
1293
01:40:43,480 --> 01:40:48,508
Kevin, am I the kind of guy that's gonna
throw his own brother out on the street?
1294
01:40:48,819 --> 01:40:51,014
- No.
- There's always a job for you...
1295
01:40:51,188 --> 01:40:54,521
...at Danny O'Shea Chevrolet.
I'll start you on commission...
1296
01:40:54,691 --> 01:40:59,321
Danny, look, there's gotta be some way
we can work this out. What do you want?
1297
01:40:59,496 --> 01:41:02,693
Well, there is one thing.
1298
01:41:02,866 --> 01:41:04,390
What?
1299
01:45:50,420 --> 01:45:51,409
[ENGLISH]
99485
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
