All language subtitles for Planet.51.2009.1080p.BluRay.x265-RARBG_English

I've never gone parking before.

I'm really not that kind of a girl.

Well, I'm not the kind of a guy
who would go with that kind of a girl.

Oh, that's so sweet. I think.

There's nothing to be scared of.

I knew this would happen if we made out!

Good shot, son.

General, I think he's surrendering.

Run! Run!

Fire at will!

Help!

Keep firing. Keep firing! Keep firing!

Kill every last alien!

You will all become my alien zombies.

-Command us, Master!
-Ouch, Mom!

What did I tell you
about these kind of movies?

It was almost over!

-Besides, they're all the same.
-That's not true.

You know, he looks just like his father.

Just like his father.

Oh, I hate the rain.

Raining rocks and dogs. Great!

Space,

a universe of mystery.

Well, today, the mystery will be unveiled.

Thanks to science, we now know
the universe is nearly 500 miles long

and it contains,
you're not going to believe this,

over 1,000 stars.

Lem, come on! Liven it up.

And still, the only known intelligent life

is right here on our planet.

No, not today! Not today! Please.

What was that?

That's our planet
after the attack of the Humaniacs.

They're gonna eat our brains for dinner!

Is that true?

Everybody, please, that's ridiculous.

Totally ridiculous.
Brains for dinner? Come on!

Brains are for breakfast with cereal and milk.

Dinner is organs and eyeballs.

Okay, everyone, everyone, please, listen up.

We're not getting eaten

or harvested
or having our brains barbecued.

The universe isn't scary. It's really amazing.

And don't forget to pick up
your planetary yo-yos.

We've got one for each of you.

You're looking at the new
Junior Assistant Curator!

High four!

Well, it's part-time now
and full-time after I graduate.

-How did you do, Lem?
-Got the job!

Knew you would.

Hey, I can see my whole life.

A house, a car, two kids,
they'll grow up and have kids.

They'll come home to visit on holidays.

-Well?
-Got it!

Lem, congratulations on that job.

-I knew you could do it.
-Yeah, thanks.

Oh, wow!

-There it is. Just two more days.
-Wow.

Humaniacs III:
The Final Battle for Our World.

-Victory or extinction!
-Victory or extinction!

If you guys go in costume,
I'm pretending we never met.

Did you just say what I think you just said?

I'm a planetarium professional now.

I don't have time for kids' movies anymore.

Kids' movies?
I suppose next you'll say aliens don't exist.

Duh!

Just as I thought. You're not Lem.

You're an alien zombie, like in Humaniacs II.

Skiff, I'm not a zombie.

Yeah, that's what you zombies
are programmed to say.

Tell me something the real Lem would know.

Well, I know Skiff is the only nutcase

who thinks the government
is hiding all alien evidence in Base 9.

And you give candy to your puppy
so he'll poop jelly beans.

It was just an experiment.

With all due respect,

I've put in the hours
and done a lot of alien research at work.

What are you talking about?
You work in a comic book store!

The greatest source of scientific knowledge.

Skiff, time to unpack the fake alien poop.

Right away, Mr. Haglug.

You will believe me, Lem,
when aliens put you on the takeout menu.

-Wow!
-Skiff!

I love fake-alien-poop day.

So, Eckle, do you think your sister's home?

-Why?
-I thought maybe...

I thought I might tell her I got the job.

-Why?
-Forget it. You tell her for me. Okay?

Okay, but every time you tell me
to tell her something,

she asks
why don't you just tell her yourself?

-What?
-And then my mom says

it's because you like her,
and then she says that, "Oh, that's so cute,"

and why don't you just ask her out already,

'cause she's been waiting
for you to ask her out

ever since we moved next door to you.

She has? The girl of my dreams likes me?

This is the best day of my life.

Yeah, we got to see that kid throw up.

Hey, he did it!

-He got the job!
-We're so proud of you.

I hear it's just one easy step up
to Senior Assistant Curator.

Come on, soldier. Take that hill.

-Hey, Neera.
-Hey, Lem.

I wanted to tell you, I got the job.

Lem, that's great!

-Maybe it's time that you and me...
-Yes?

I mean, would you want to...

Hey, Neera!
I've been looking all over for you.

-You've been looking for me?
-The cause needs you.

-The what?
-The cause.

Glar's involved with something
he calls "protesting."

It's like when you shout about stuff
that makes you upset.

Yeah, like our school pictures.

Why do they have to be of our faces?

I mean, what a bummer.

That means it's not good.

Neera, we need you! Righteous momma!

I'm so honored,
but Lem was about to ask me something.

Yeah? Man, what do you want to ask her?

-It's kind of private.
-No problemo, man!

I mean, I totally respect that.

So, Neera...

Neera and Lem had a private conversation

And don't want anybody else around

Yeah, you know, we can talk later.

Okay.

Peace.

That means, "See you later."

Bye!

Bye.

"The cause, man."

I'd like to cause him some pain.

I don't want to hear a single bubble.

Especially you, Bubbles.

Call the General! Call the General!

It's in the Containment Room.
Lock this section down, now!

Resistance is futile. Surrender or die.

Come on, Eckle. Go help your father.

What the...

Duck?

Wow!

No! No! No! No! No!

Mom, Dad, there's a ship in the...

My car!

Open wide
or the big, bad monster will get you.

The battle for our world has begun.

-Captain, mobilize the army.
-Yes, sir!

Right, men, move it!

Are they hostile? Will our species survive?

One thing we do know is

that they show no respect for
our parking laws.

And speaking of survival,

how will you survive
without a sparkling smile?

Give your smile that special glow

Try the sparkle action of Dental Pro

You know,
you're really good as that toothbrush.

Yeah. But what I really do best
is a suppository.

Now, let's see. Invasion by giant ants.

Invasion by sea monsters.

Invasion by 50-foot woman?

Here it is,
So, You've Been Invaded by Aliens.

-Keep your eyes on the aliens.
-Aliens?

All right, class, let's try it one more time.

The aliens are coming!

Flarc, you were too slow.
Go join the zombies.

I called it. The only question is,

should I be terrified
because it's the end of the world

or happy because I totally called it?

Me, I have a plan.

They're gonna need a native
to run the mines.

I'll befriend them,
show my executive skills, and bam! I'm in.

Speaking of "bam! I'm in..."

A cork?

It's your best defense against the aliens'
favorite form of research.

The probe.

You put it...

-Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think I get it.
-Oh, wait.

This is yours. I already used that one.

I just remembered, my job.

Gotta go. You know, my boss.

Your boss? No problem.
You guys can share.

Neera, you have to choose.

It's either me or Glar.

Oh, Lem, there's no question.

It's you, of course.

Come on! Come on! Come on!

Hello. This is the alien hotline.

Yes. Hi. I've found the alien.

They're here, and no weapon can stop them.

You've got to be kidding.

-Hello?
-Yes, hello. I've found the alien!

If you've spotted an alien fleet, dial 1.

For pod people, dial 2.

I can breathe! I can breathe!

You speak my language.

That's amazing! You speak my language.

Yeah. That's what I just said.

You just said, "That's what I just said."

-Say something else.
-Like what?

"Like what."
They're gonna freak back at Kennedy.

I'm Captain Charles T. Baker, astronaut.

As-tro-nau-t.

-Ass...
-Tro-naut.

Lem.

Lem.

Either your name is Lem,
or you want to mate with me.

Houston, we have a little problem.

-What do you want?
-Thanks for asking.

Coffee, light, two sugars.

Do you have any Frappuccino up here?
Any puff pastry, too. Thanks.

No, I mean are you here
to take over our world

and, like, eat our brains?

Hold on.

What kind of sick planet is this?

First of all,
it's supposed to be uninhabited, okay?

Not full of sea monkeys
dancing to the oldies.

My mission was to plant Old Glory,
whack a few golf balls

and head back to the Kids' Choice Awards.
I'm getting slimed.

-What?
-You were just talking alien.

Hey, I'm not the alien here. You are.

-Me? You are.
-No, you are.

You are. You... You came to my planet.

An alien planet. Hello.

-Hello.
-Not, "Hello." "Hello!"

-Hello... What?
-What?

Let's start over.

Look, there's a command module
in orbit right now.

It's running out of fuel.

It has to leave in 74 hours,
and if I'm not on it,

it goes back to Earth without me. Capisce?

I have to get to my ship
and go back up in space.

Can you help me?

You want me to take you
to your flying saucer? No!

If they catch me helping you,
who knows what they'll do to me?

I'll lose everything.
My life was just getting perfect.

Kid... You are a kid, right?

I mean, you're not like
a thousand-year-old Yoda or anything?

Never mind. Look, kid, you're my only hope.

But I suppose you could leave me stranded.

My wife will have to support the kids.

Eleven. We have 11 kids, always hungry.

Yeah. Yeah.
But, hey, they'll get by without a father.

The important thing here
is you avoid a little trouble.

Alien hotline.
What's the nature of your sighting?

Hello? Are you there?

Hello? Are you there?

Hey, fella. Who wants a donut?

Silly dog!

There's your flying saucer. Now what?

Okay, here's the plan.

You knock out that cop,
then you overpower those two.

You neutralize that one

and handcuff the big guy
to the steering wheel.

That's your plan?
What if they start shooting?

You're one of their own.
They'll probably just aim for your legs.

-My legs?
-Don't your legs grow back?

No. We're not like your kind, okay?

I'll tell you what, eat this.

-You become invincible.
-Oh, good. Then you do it.

I can't be seen breaking the law.
I've got the right stuff.

-The what?
-The right stuff.

It means I have a lot of courage.

Now go!

Go on! Go! Go! Go!

Hey, Lem, something wrong?

Left flank. Move it! Move it!

As you can see,
the army is taking positions,

just like in The War of the Worlds,

getting ready for our first close encounter
with invaders from outer space.

Attention!

So they've come.

-Captain!
-Sir.

Have your men search the flying saucer.

Yes, sir! Move!

-Hazmat team, go!
-Sir!

Now our brave soldiers
are entering the alien spaceship.

It doesn't look big enough
to be a space destroyer.

It's dark in here.

Hey, look!

No sign of the pilot, sir.

Are you getting...

I've never seen such a heinous weapon.

We are up against a cruel, sadistic enemy.

Seal off the town.
I want that alien pilot found.

I protest!

They're bumming me out
with their bad vibrations

Well, there's one thing you've gotta do...

Never mind, Captain. The alien is right here.

-Grab him!
-Yes, sir!

Glar's not the alien!

Oh, no? Then what do you call this?

-Hair. He likes it long.
-Very unusual.

You might even say, very alien!

Excuse me! General!
He does go to the high school.

Glar's just trying to say
the aliens might be friendly.

Lem! Lem, you know astronomy.

If an alien came all this way,

wouldn't it be smart enough
to come in peace?

No! No! No! No! No!

I mean, they've come to harvest our organs,
make us slaves.

Me?

We should all, all of us,
right now, go home and hide.

That's a sensible young man. Let him go.

And the rest of you,
go to your homes and wait for instructions.

Hi.

Go back to your homes. Show's over.

Okay, come on, come on.

Hurry up. Go! Go! Go! Go!

Great! Just great!

Look, I said I'd take you
to your flying saucer, okay?

Well, there it is. Now, leave.

I'll get you a blanket and a pillow
for the night.

It's a miracle I'm gonna need.

Oh, you... You like the stone?
You like the stone?

Go! Go! Go get it!

There it is! Stop!

Don't move!

Aliens are quite like us,
except they have two sets of teeth,

hypodermic fingertips and hypnotic eyes
to control our brains

hypodermic fingertips and hypnotic eyes
to control our brains

and turn us into an army of zombies
and destroy our world.

What?

Remember, anyone caught
helping the aliens will go to jail.

Jail? This is great!

Yesterday, my life was perfect,

and now, I'm the most wanted
super-criminal in the world.

At least you have a world.

I'll probably never see mine again.

Our preliminary procedures
have been completed, sir.

The spacecraft is quarantined.

We're looking for a place
for your headquarters, sir, and...

Still no trace of the alien, sir.

Where would you hide if you were an alien?

Hide? Bravo, General.

An alien invader spends over $500
to fly across the universe to hide.

You clown!
He's here to take over our minds!

-Even yours!
-Diabolical!

Captain, place me under arrest.

Not so fast, General.

I've trained my superior intellect
to recognize alien mind slaves.

You're clean.

But he's a zombie, and those two.

How will we know who is a zombie?

Well, zombies don't feel any pain.

-You're clean.
-You, too.

General, you must capture the alien alive
and bring it to me.

I will unlock the secrets
of its marvelous brain.

Captain, search the town.

Go door to door if you must,
but find that alien.

Hello, Plark, if that really is you.

Have a nice day, Serbok,
or should I call you by your alien name?

It's you. It's you!

It's you!

How come I have to go to the dentist
if it's the end of the world, Mom?

Invasion or not, you've got to go.

My mom's a zombie! Help!

Zombie!

Okay, right, so,
this is the last street we're gonna do today.

-Okay, let's start at this end.
-Wait. I think I'm a zombie.

I'm hearing an irritating, piercing voice
in the back of my head.

-Oh, shut up. It's me.
-It's there again!

It's me, you moron.

Hey, what's that?

Hey, look.

That's funny!

Look at it! Look at the dog!

Mom?

Mom? Mom! Don't come in!

Rover? Boy, am I glad to see you! Rover!

Rover?

He's a probe we sent
to take pictures of your world.

Hey, a planet full of aliens,
and you sent back pictures of rocks?

Bad boy! Bad boy.

-Mom, don't come in!
-The alien!

Can I get your autograph?

Eckle, this isn't a comic book, okay?
It's serious.

I don't mind.
It comes with being a national hero.

And... And my Humaniacs poster?

And my... And my chest?

Hey, how about a snapshot?

Get one of me looking up at the stars.

-Mom!
-I saw the alien last night.

I am so in.

I got this guy wrapped around
my little finger.

Let me tell you, this alien's not so scary.

Your personal chef reporting for duty, sir.

May I give you some
tasty suggestions for tonight?

I've got a list of
the fattest teachers in my school

in case you're looking for a light snack.

Skiff, stop.
He's not here to eat us or anything.

He's harmless to everyone but me.

Better let me do the talking.

I think he's eyeing you for dessert.

It's kind of cute, the way he does that.

Oh, great. Let's just have a party!

We're doing a routine search for the alien.

Don't shoot! Don't shoot.

It's trying to control our minds.

-What do we do?
-Don't look in its eyes.

That's how they take over your brain.

Brains? That's right, brains!

You are my zombie slaves.

-I want to control your brains.
-It's inside my head!

Its will is too strong!

Hey, Macarena

-Command us, Master.
-Command us, Master.

-Command me, too.
-It's not real.

I think I know
when I'm being mind-controlled.

Hey, maybe they could get me on my ship.

I'm leaning toward "probably not."

...an extensive search.

-But I think I know who can.
-In the meantime at the landing site,

just to the left of me here,
everything is checked and double-checked.

The High Command
taking control of the situation...

You want our home for your headquarters?

Gee, that would be a great honor.

Honey, tell Lem we have guests.

Lem, there's someone you'd like to...

Check the papers.

Kiss the ship goodbye, Rover.

You really think you can get me on TV?

You're the biggest story in history.

-The whole planet will watch.
-The whole planet?

Interesting.

I left my hair products on the ship,
but I could improvise.

You know, astronauts have to deal
with any kind of emergency.

I get it. He can tell everyone he's peaceful.

All we need is a safe place, that TV reporter,

and then we can all get on with our lives.

Skiff, the comic book store, let's go there.

Okay, but if he's not housebroken,
you're cleaning up his mess.

We need a slogan, like something that says,

"It's a bummer to make war on the aliens
when we should make..."

Hey, Neera! Hi! Hi!

Kill any aliens, Lem?

Oh, no, you don't understand.
These soldiers aren't...

Oh, great! This day gets better and better.

General Grawl,
you better take a look at this.

Professor, take a look.

This is obviously alien writing.

It says, "Surrender or die,"

and this is a list of surrender terms.

Diabolical.

What are you doing in Lem's room?

I'm afraid your son is a zombie.

-Hey, kid, what's bugging you?
-Neera.

-What is that, like an alien hernia?
-Well, sort of.

It's the girl of my dreams,
and now she hates me.

Hate's a strong word.
Maybe she just dislikes you.

Plus, there's another guy, Glar.

Okay. You know your problem?

It's not Glar or Neera. It's Lem.

Look at you. You're so left-brain.

Or is it right brain? Whatever.

You're like the chief of control.
You've got to loosen up.

We've got a little time.
You, my friend, are in luck.

The doctor is in.

Me and green bean need to talk.

Before we begin, I have a technical question.

Are you considered
very ugly on this planet?

-What?
-Because I can't tell.

No.

-I mean, I'm okay.
-Oh, good. Good.

Why do chicks dig me?

Because I'm handsome?
Because I'm an astronaut?

Yes, and yes.

But it's also because
of Chuck Baker's three steps to romance.

Spot your prey.

Make your move. Show no mercy.

Hey, baby.

I saw you across the bar.

Are sparks flying or is this place on fire?

-You're sure you're not ugly, right?
-I think so.

Baby, tomorrow I go up in space,
maybe never to return.

Let's make our last night
a night to remember.

Lem! The cork!

The cork! Remember the plan!

The only plan here is to get Chuck on TV.

I'll be right back with the reporter.
I'm leaving you in charge.

In charge?

You heard him.

Things are going to be
different around here.

My wish is your command.

Come on, boys, let's track down this story.

We need an alien for the 6:00 news.

Wait! Stop! Hey!

-We're really upset!
-Yeah.

-Upset we really are.
-Yeah.

Are we upset, really?

Neera! I need to talk to you.

I thought you were after the alien.

-That's not what's going on.
-Then what is?

I...

Mysterious Lem

Tell us the secrets of your heart

I can't say.

Lem, I always thought we'd be together,

but I need someone who doesn't
always believe what he's been told.

It's like Glar says,
"The times, they are a-different."

Maybe you should go.

-Hey, baby.
-What?

Is this place sparking

or is fire making this a night
to show no mercy?

Did I happen to mention I'm not ugly?

Are you crazy?

Hey, is this guy giving you bad vibrations?

Lem was just leaving.

I'm hungry, guys.

Are you kidding me?

If you have to do a number one,
use these papers.

If you have to do a number two, go outside.

And, if it's number three, I can't help you.

Got you, alien! Victory or extinction!

Oh, yeah?
In space, no one can hear you scream!

-You missed!
-Crush, kill, destroy.

Crush, kill, destroy.

Hey, Master! We want to be destroyed, too!

Quick, cover the camera!

If it gets damaged again,
we'll have to pay for it.

You're afraid of a widdle storm.
It's nothing. You see?

Rover!

Rover!

Sit, Rover! Sit! Stop!
Heel! Roll over! Come back! Listen...

You can't escape the tractor beam.

It's pulling you to your doom!

6:00 news, here we go.

...going on a journey.

Soon, we will crush the rebel alliance

and control the galaxy.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

You are a rebel spy
and a traitor to the Empire.

Take her away.

Skiff!

Hasta la vista, baby. You are terminated.

General, over there.
Aren't those comic books?

Captain, get your men!

We gotta get out of here now!

Move it! Move it! Go, go, go, go, go, go, go!

Chuck, come on!

-Sorry, pal. Too dangerous.
-But...

Out!

You there! Stop!

Don't lose him, sir!

Wow!

Don't you ever run off like that.

What if they took you to the pound?

How would I find you?

Lem?

Oh, boy!

We'd better run!

Let's move!

Move! Move! Move! Move! Move!

Move it! Move it! Move it! Go!

Let the doctor handle this.

Ladies, who wants to meet an astronaut?

-Ladies! One at a time!
-Chuck!

I'm on Facebook.

Ready?

Look out! The monster!

It's getting away!

-Got you!
-Rover? No!

-Quick, hotwire the car!
-What? Hotwire the who?

When are you green goobers
going to evolve?

-Attention, all personnel.
-What's the matter?

Why did he do it?

I was gonna teach him to beg
and everything.

Amazing! The alien's brain is so powerful,
it's controlling them even now.

What is it telling you to do?

I think I'm supposed to dig a hive
for the alien queen.

Yeah. I'm supposed to blow up things.

-I mean, unless you need help with the hive.
-Oh, no, I'm good.

-You sure?
-I'm good.

Never mind them, Professor.

This thing has all the answers.

Where's your master? Talk!

The flying saucer
is going to an undisclosed location

to be taken apart and studied.

This reporter is now going to reveal
to you where that location is.

This reporter has just been told
that if I do that,

I will be taken apart and studied.

Oh, look. That's perfect. That's great.

Oh, just great! Perfect!

John Glenn goes around the world,
he's a senator for life.

I went across the fricking universe!

I should be governor, minimum!

But, no,
I'm marooned here on this stupid rock!

This stupid rock is my home,

or it was until you came along
and ruined everything!

I want my life back, unless, I don't know,

maybe there's something else
you want to ruin.

Who's that?

My boss.

Sorry, Mr. Hucklo.
It's just for one little night.

Maybe a week. I really hope this
doesn't affect our working relationship.

Oh, great! Just great! Fired.

Say, why don't you just harvest my organs
and get it over with?

Oh, great. Now look what you did.
You made him really upset.

Lem?

Lem?

You're looking right at my home.

See that star, the little red one?

Circling that star is a planet called Earth.

It's about 20 billion miles away, give or take.

There's no way space is that big.

What? Are you kidding?

There's billions of galaxies,
and each galaxy has billions of stars.

Next to that, kid,
our planets are just dust in the wind.

So, nothing I knew was right?

Come on. You knew about Neera.

I mean, look at her.

Lose the antennae,
get some plastic surgery, she's a hottie.

I don't have the right stuff, like you.

Kid...

I never had the right stuff.

I'm a button pusher, Spam in a can.

I don't even fly the ship. It's all automatic.

I only got this far on charm
and my rugged good looks.

You risked everything
to help a stranger from another world.

You're the one with the right stuff.

Get out of here.

Finally! We've been looking for you!

Guys!

Great hiding spot. I call the closet.

No way! Let's go fight the army.

How's your species at hiding?
Can you change your skin to this color?

Your call, Captain Baker.
What's it going to be, fight or hide?

Neither.

I think Lem's saying he wants the closet.

I'll tell you what it's going to be.
We're gonna go get Chuck back to his ship.

Skiff, you were right about Base 9.
That's where they have his ship.

-But we don't know where it is.
-Yes, we do.

Rover found me.
He's also programmed to find my ship.

Wait, where is Rover?

-It's too painful to talk about.
-It's okay.

They've got him at the comic book shop.

Well, then, we've got to go get him.

Hold on.
The whole army's looking for you two.

You can't just stroll through town.

Wait, wait, that new movie,
doesn't that open tonight?

Yeah. Why?

The citizens of Glipforg
are undaunted by alien invaders

and are bravely going about
their normal routines.

Got you!

There's the comic book store. Let's go.

What great costumes!

You two are finalists. Up on stage.

We're not here to enter the contest.

Then why are you dressed like aliens?

We're here to win the contest.

-What?
-Yeah, good.

Trust me. Trust me.

Private, come here.

Hold your fire, soldier.

Take us to your leader.

Welcome to
the Humaniacs III Costume Contest.

We're really upset! We're really upset!

Let's hear it for the finalists.

What are we supposed to do?

Give them their daily
minimum dose of Chuck.

Hello, Humaniacs!

Come on, Lem!

Look at me. Watch this.

Yeah! That's it!

Bust a move, green machine.

All right!

The alien!

Lem!

Over here!

There he is!

All of these costumes!
Sir, how do we find the alien?

Simple, Captain.
Like us, the alien is in uniform.

Grab him!

-I got you!
-Chuck!

No! No! Get off!

Okay, keep back.

Move.

Time to meet the monster face to face.

Look at it, Professor. It's hideous.
And that smell...

Hey, you try wearing
the same suit for three weeks.

What a remarkable brain you must have.

An incision here and here,
it should pop right out.

No! You're making a mistake! He's friendly!

This poor boy's obviously a zombie.

-I'll remove his brain, too.
-What?

You are no longer needed, slave.

I release you. Return to your puny life.

Kid, I'm going down anyway.

There's no need for you to come with me.

Thanks for everything.

How about it, Professor?

Difficult to tell.

Do you still believe the alien is friendly?

-No.
-This boy is free!

Oh, Lem! We're so glad you're not a zombie!

What about the alien spawn, sir?

I want it destroyed, one little piece at a time.

All right, let's get these aliens to Base 9!

Not that it exists.

Move it!

Go on.

Get in!

We're here to honor
a young man who survived

a harrowing ordeal at the hands
of the alien monster.

Lem, come on out!

Son?

Lem, I understand you'll be working
right here after you graduate,

teaching about the mysteries of space.

Give us a preview of what we'll learn.

Well, we know everything
about our universe.

-It's 500 miles long
-500 miles!

-Remarkable!
-I can't.

Space isn't 500 miles. It's not.

It's so much bigger than we can imagine.

There's billions of galaxies,
and each galaxy has billions of stars,

and next to that, our planet is just...

Excuse me.

Lem?

I know I was kind of harsh. I'm really sorry.

Oh, hi, Neera.

-What are you doing?
-It's called hotwiring.

It's how they start cars on Earth.

Lem, I was thinking...

Well, you know, now that this is all over...

-Yeah, Neera?
-Maybe we could...

Lem, you left everyone hanging!

-I'm going to go find Chuck.
-But how?

-It's impossible without Rover!
-My little Rovie.

I can still hear his wagging little antenna.

Rover?

Rover!

Rover! Rover!

You're alive!

But how did you get out?

Good going, boy!

Rover, Rover, can you find Chuck?
Where's Chuck?

You're going with me?

All right!

Thought you could take over our world?

Your kind knows no decency.

-You mean chick magnets?
-No, aliens.

Tell us your invasion plans.

And don't bother taking over my mind.

If you do,
Captain Kisno has orders to shoot me.

If you take over Captain Kisno's mind,

Lieutenant Groit has orders to shoot him.

If you take over Lieutenant Groit's mind,

Sergeant York will shoot Captain Kisno,
Lieutenant Groit and myself,

along with these three soldiers.

Each man has a designated target
in the squad.

Should you succeed
in taking over all our minds,

Corporal Hisk has orders
to electrocute everyone.

If this fails, the entire base is rigged to blow
at the touch of a button.

General, sir? Am I supposed to shoot
Hecknavar or Kolski?

-I shoot Kolski.
-No. You shoot Meckavoy.

-Well, then who shoots Kolski?
-I can shoot myself.

That won't be necessary.
Hecknavar, you shoot Kolski,

Captain Kisno and graze Corporal Hisk.

Yes, sir!

Not yet!

-Drop your weapon!
-You.

No! You first.

-You're mine, Hecknavar!
-I'm not taking my eyes off Kisno.

Drop it, dirtbag!

Hold your fire!

Hold your fire!

Captain Kisno, get everyone out of here.

You're not thinking
all this is my fault, right?

All right, if you won't tell us,

there's another way
to unlock the secrets of your brain.

Professor Kipple!

He's all yours.

He thinks we've found him.

Hang on, Chuck. We'll find you.

There you are.
I was just warming up for you.

Now, we'll have that brain out in no time.

You don't want my brain. It's useless.

I spent four years at a party school.
Trust me, it's mush.

Hello? Anyone here?

-Skiff, what are you doing?
-Come on. No one's around.

I'm not going to get caught.

Hey! Look, look, look.
I'm paying! I'm paying!

The thing with the...

I mean, it just went over the... Wow!

Base 9.

This is amazing! I was right again!

How do we get in without being seen?

Well, I tried to get along
tried to play along happily

But I'm sorry, Officer
Your rules ain't no good for me

There's one thing you've got to do
And that's stick it to the man

Stick it to the, stick it to the...

Stick it to...

Now!

Cool.

I don't suppose
your planet's invented painkillers?

Yeah! Good work, Rover!

Guys! This is so Luke Skywalker!

By the way,
you're not brother and sister, right?

-How much time is left?
-Just enough.

Rover here will take us right to my ship.

That's a funny place for his antenna.

Captain, I want the whole base on red alert!

Yes, sir!

General, you must save its brain!

I'm more concerned with saving a world.

That professor's a genius.

I feel positively effervescent.

In fine fettle. What a salubrious experience!

Well said. Cheers!

My ship!

Way to go, kid!

Step away from the flying saucer!

And put your hands in the air.

There was never a chance you'd get away.

You'd destroy the whole base
just to get me?

-That is sick!
-Actually, it's kind of flattering.

Sick? Sick, young lady, is helping
the enemy of your world.

Sick is befriending a creature
that's so completely different.

Sick is... Well, look, it's right in front of you!

I'm sorry, Professor. It's too dangerous
to let the alien live another minute.

Wait! Wait! Wait! Stop!

General, I know what you're afraid of,
and it's not Chuck.

It's not monsters or aliens.

It's the unknown.

I've spent my whole life running from it,
and I think maybe you have, too,

but I'm telling you,
the unknown isn't something to be afraid of.

It can be your best friend.

And just when you think that it means
the end of everything you know,

it's really just the beginning.

Base destruct, two minutes.

What are you looking at? Run!

Take that!

Everyone on board! Let's go!

Attention, all personnel.
Evacuate base immediately.

-What are you doing?
-I can't leave him here.

-Why not?
-Because he's got the right stuff.

Base destruct, 60 seconds.

-There's no time for autopilot.
-What's the matter now?

I'm going to have to pilot this bucket.

Base destruct in 15 seconds.

She is so heavy!

Ten, nine, eight, seven, six,

five, four, three, two, one.

Yeah!

You guys should check this out.

-Hey, what do you think?
-Such a big universe.

I am definitely coming back here.

Am I a zombie now?

This guy reads too many comic books.

Hey, Neera, now that this is all over,

-would you want to...
-Yes.

But you didn't hear what I was gonna...

Gross!

Strap in, everyone,
'cause I'm taking you home.

Hey, it's Lem!

Hi!

The General, too.

The monster!

It's all right, Chief. He's with me.

Soldiers, attention!

There is among us an astronaut.

Captain, thanks for coming back for me.

A pleasure, General.

Maybe next time you have guests
you'll throw a better party.

Kid, how would you like to be president

of the local
Chuck Baker, Party Maker Fan Club?

Oh, yeah!

Oh, can I join?

Be a good boy,
and don't forget to drink your oil.

Rover, you coming?

Or do you want to stay here?

Rover! My little bitty boy!

Lem, you saved my life.

You saved mine, too.

That was a man hug, just then.
It's very big on my planet.

Hey, take care of this guy, okay?

You're a great planet, and your '50s are fine,

but give me a call when you get to the '60s,

'cause that's gonna be fun.

Doc, that brain operation was inspired.

You simply must try it.

No, no, no, no! No! No, no.

Oh, no, no, boy. Easy, easy.

Not the tongue. Not the...

This is gonna be a long trip.