Original subtitles

Excuse me.

Excuse me.

Are you Dr. Margaret Ford?

Yes.

Could I ask you... Would you sign my book?

Yes, of course.

- I recognized you from your picture. - Uh-huh.

- I hope I'm not inconveniencing you. - No, not at all.

It's for a friend. It's the second one I've bought.

Then I'm doubly pleased. Thank you for buying it.

You've helped me very much.

I'm very glad I have.

Thank you.

Good-bye.

And I saw the face of an animal.

And I said that we all try to run from experience.

From experience. Do you understand me?

But that it will seek us out.

You think that you're exempt?

I'm talking to you. Do you think that you're exempt?

Do I think that I'm exempt? That I'm exempt from what?

- Experience. - No.

I don't think that I'm exempt.

Well, you better be assured you're not.

What is the animal?

The animal.

You said in your dream you saw the face of an animal.

- I don't know how to say it. It was... - Yes?

It was a... I...

I want to say...

I don't know how to say it.

- I'm so sorry I'm late. - Oh, that's okay.

- You've eaten. Good. - Now, how are you today, Maggie?

I'm fine. Listen to this.

In her dream, she saw a foreign animal.

What is the animal? She cannot think of the name.

The animal is saying, "I am only trying to do good."

I say, "What name comes up when you think of this animal?"

- She says... - Yes?

"It is a lurg. It is called a lurg."'

And so if we invert "lurg," a lurg is a girl.

And so she is the animal, and she is saying, "I'm just trying to do good."

And now someone has heard her. Good, Maggie.

Good for you. Good work.

And now, what are you going to eat?

I don't have time.

It's so beautiful. It's old, and it's heavy.

It looks like someone gave it to you.

Sometimes I think the only pressures in my life...

- The only what? - I'm sorry?

You said "the only pressures."

"Pleasures." I said "pleasures."

No. What you said was "pressures," and this is what I'm telling you.

Many things that should be pleasures are not.

Your book is a best seller. Your income jumps up.

People think of you differently perhaps.

This is confusing.

Listen to me. Slow down.

Try to enjoy your success.

Give yourself all the rewards you would like to have.

You see a beautiful gold lighter,

buy one for yourself.

Your friend asks you to lunch,

go and eat lunch with her.

- Do you forgive me? - No.

Good-bye.

Go work.

Uh, sort of a...

- A what? - I don't know. A feeling of nothingness.

And what does that make you think of?

Will you leave me alone, for Christ's sake?

What does it matter? What does it mean? You understand?

It's in my head or not. It doesn't make a difference.

- Billy. - What?

Are you going to tell me I'm entitled to my feelings?

What does it... What the hell does it matter?

It matters if you're going to cure yourself.

If I'm going to cure myself.

- And what do I do now? - What do you do now?

No, no. What do I do today? What do I do tomorrow?

Today and tomorrow, you say this:

"I am a compulsive gambler.

The reasons for this are in the past."

Oh, man. I don't know. What am I doing here? What am I doing here?

You're here to take control of your life.

You want to know something?

What the hell do you care, man?

You're rich. You're comfortable.

You got your goddamn book you wrote.

All the time you want to help me, you don't do dick.

You don't do nothing, you and your goddamn book.

It's talk. And it's just talk.

The whole thing is a con game.

You do nothing. This doesn't help me.

You want to help me?

You want to help me? Help me with this.

Help me with this if you can. Because if not, I gotta use it.

To use it for what?

- Aren't you gonna ask me, "Is it loaded?" - To use it for what?

To use it to kill myself or, you know, to...

- I don't know, to... - Why would you want to kill yourself?

What do you think this is? Some dream?

Man, you're living in the dream... your questions.

- 'Cause there is a real world. - And what happened to you in that world?

- What happened to you? - What difference does it make?

You say you want to help. You can't help, 'cause, babe, you don't know what trouble is.

Give me the gun,

and I will help you.

Billy.

Billy, I swear to you.

You give me the gun,

and I will help you.

I just lost $25,000

that I do not have.

And if I do not pay it by tomorrow, they are going to kill me.

Now...

what kind of help is your damn promise now?

- Can I help you? - Yeah, I need a match.

- You looking for a partner to play something? - I'm looking for Mike.

- Who's Mike? - Would you get him for me?

I don't think Mike is here.

Why don't you go take a look?

What the fuck is it?

I'm looking for Mike.

Mike isn't here. What do you want?

- A friend of mine... - Hey. Cut to the chase.

- I'm very busy. What do you want with Mike? - I'm telling you, and you're Mike.

I want you to listen to this, 'cause you threatened to kill a friend of mine.

Is that what I did?

Yes, that's exactly what you did, Mike, and that behavior doesn't go.

Whether you mean it or not.

And it's irrelevant to me, 'cause you aren't going to do it.

Now, this is a sick kid.

- He's a compulsive gambler, and he... - Wait, wait. What is this?

What are you gonna do to me? What are you fronting off about?

If I'm this bad dude, why don't I take out some gun, blow you to a billion parts?

I'll tell you why. 'Cause I think you're just a bully.

Just a bully?

What, you're not gonna let me carry your books?

Aren't you a caution.

Let's talk turkey, pal.

One, you threatened to kill my friend.

You aren't going to do that. 'Cause if you do, you're going away for life.

- Two is the money. - Money?

- He hasn't got it, but... - Who is this friend?

- Billy Hahn. - Billy Hahn.

- He lost how much to me? - Come on. Come on. $25,000.

$25,000 Billy Hahn has lost to me.

Excuse me one moment, will you?

You say Billy Hahn lost 25 large to me.

I'm showing you this 'cause I like you, okay?

'Cause you got blonde hair.

You're looking at Billy Hahn's IOU. Okay?

- Billy Hahn owes me 800 bucks. - In or out?

Deal past me.

Okay?

How come you made me so quick? How did you size me up so quick that I'm...

I'm not some hard guy who's gonna rough you up or something?

- I don't know. In my work... - What work is that?

- Well, it's none of your business. - In or out?

Out!

Oh, it's none of my business. Okay, then I stand corrected.

Here's the thing.

- I want something from you. - What do you want?

- I want you to do me a favor. - Why should I do you a favor?

'Cause if you do, I'll forget the 800 your friend owes me.

- What do you want? - Let's talk for a minute.

What is it?

- Do you know what a tell is? - A tell?

Here. Do this.

You have to choose a hand.

You do it to me. Do it.

Bingo. Do it again.

Okay. Now, I can do that all day.

How? You got a tell. You're telling me the hand that has the coin.

- I am? - Yes.

- How? - It's not important.

Okay. You're doing it with your nose.

You point your nose slightly at the hand that has the coin.

Okay? That's a tell.

Now, look back over my shoulder.

A guy in a beard, in a cowboy shirt...

- Do you see him? - Yes.

He's from Las Vegas. He's been beating me all night. He's got a tell. Okay?

When he's bluffing, okay, he plays with his little gold ring.

I caught him doing it. And he knows I did, so he stopped.

He's conscious of himself.

- I want you to do me this favor. - What's that?

I want you to be my girlfriend for a while, come in the game.

You stand behind me, watch me play.

We get in a big hand, I... I go to go pee.

You watch this guy and tell me,

does he play with his gold ring?

Then I know he's bluffing, I win the big hand,

and I forget the 800 your friend owes.

If you're such a good gambler, how'd you fall into this bind?

Who told you I'm a good gambler? I'm not a gambler.

- You're not a gambler? - No.

- What are you then? - Look, I made you a deal.

I'll tear up your friend's marker if you help me out.

Will you do that?

All right.

Two.

Three.

- One card. - The man takes one.

Dealer takes three.

- I bet a hundred. - Call.

Call.

Up 200.

Here we go.

Your three.

And five more.

Call.

- Pass. - The guy's got a full house. You got two pair.

It puts you in a philosophically indefensible position.

Well, it's good that I can joke about it, isn't it?

I'm out. You drove me out.

A man with style is a man who can smile.

- How are you? - I can't get a hand to save my soul.

- You having a good time? - Never better.

- Glad to hear it. - Out.

I'm out.

Damn cards... cold as ice.

- Full house. - New hand.

- What you do, win again? - That's right.

If you want to win the hand, you gotta stay in till the end.

- Thank you. - What do you gotta do around here to win a pot?

- You're gonna help me out here. - Yes.

You keep looking for the tell.

If he plays with his ring, I'm gonna gut that son of a bitch.

- Can we deal? - Deal, say the losers.

Well, the man says you gotta give action to get action.

Yeah, I've heard that too.

I bet the flush, the flush don't come. I slow-play chips, and nobody calls.

- New hand and a winner. - Budge over, will ya?

- Ante up. - Everybody stays. Everybody pays.

Here they come.

I bet 50.

I call.

And 50 back.

Fold.

100, and 200 more.

I call.

200. I call it.

Cards to the players. Three good players.

Mike?

One card.

Al?

One moment. I'll take three.

One card.

I pass.

What's the pot? Two, four, five... $800.

That's my bet.

I call it.

You call.

You only call?

Well, let's go visit Mr. More.

Your 800.

And I raise 2,500 bucks.

I can't stand it. South.

I'm going south.

South Street Seaport, the man says.

He can't stand the heat. He can't stand it.

You want to play cards? The bet is two and a half thou.

The bet? I'll tell you what the bet is.

Your 25.

And I raise you $6,000.

You son of a bitch! You've been steamrolling over me all night!

What are you trying to tell me? One card? You caught a flush? A boat? What?

I think you're bluffing, pal. I think you're trying to buy it.

Then you're gonna have to give me some respect or give me some money.

- The bet is $6,000. - I know what the goddamn bet is!

I'm going to pee.

Watch my cards.

I thought you were gonna bring me luck.

Make your own luck.

- Taking change. - Uh-huh.

And I think I might have to go to the well again.

Yes, yes, yes.

Some people say one thing.

Some people say something else.

If the man can't play, he should stay away.

His money is as good as yours is.

His money is. Now we're gonna see about his cards.

That's right, miss, isn't it?

Now we're gonna see his hand.

How you doing, miss? You bringing him good fortune?

Excuse me?

Who do you like in this hand, him or me?

- Leave the woman alone. - Just making conversation.

Who do you like in this showdown here, your friend or me?

Well, I've seen his hand, but I haven't seen yours.

That's right.

That's absolutely right.

Okay, let's play some cards.

Now, the bet is what?

You're raised $6,000, Mike.

Mike, how you feeling? You ready to take this guy's money?

Give me a light.

- He's bluffing. - You saw him?

He did exactly what you said. He played with his ring.

He did? Well, he better be.

'Cause my problem is I don't have the six, and if I lose...

- You aren't going to. - Are you sure you saw him?

He played with his ring. Call the bet.

The bet is $6,000.

$6,000.

I think you're bluffin'.

What are you, Joe Hep? I didn't ask what you think. Raise, call, or fold.

I should raise your ass, but I'm just gonna call.

My marker's good for a moment.

- What is this marker? Where are you from? - Where am I from?

I'm from the United States of Kiss My Ass. My marker's good.

Fuck you! And get the goddamn money up or fold the goddamn hand!

Listen, mister, this man is a man of his word. He's a regular player.

Where I come from, the rule is you can't call the bet, you're out of the hand.

Call the bet.

I'll call the bet.

- I'll back it up. - With what?

I said I'll back it up.

If he loses, I'll write you a check.

Who is this broad?

She's a friend of Mike's. She's all right. Your bet is called.

Trip aces. Beat 'em, my friend.

Club flush.

You owe me $6,000. Thank you very much.

Next case.

Tough beat, Mike.

It happens to the best. It happens to the rest.

I'm going home.

I'm out too.

Gentlemen.

Good night.

Huh.

I thought you had him, Mike.

I, uh...

Yes?

- He didn't do the thing with his ring. - No, he did it.

He did? Then the fuck is he doing with a flush?

What the fuck are you doing with a flush?

That beat trips where you come from?

Give me the goddamn money.

- We lost. - I have gathered that.

I, uh...

And if you think I'm leaving here without that check,

you're out of your motherfucking mind.

- Hey, look... - I'll look later. Now give me the money!

Okay. Okay, okay. Give me a moment, will ya?

Because I won that money from you, baby.

I'll give it to you when I get to it! Now don't get pushy!

Pushy, Jim? Pushy?

You don't know what pushy is.

Now give me my $6,000.

They put me in, um...

an embarrassing position,

but I'm gonna have to ask you for that money.

- That's right. - I can't tell you how sorry I am.

No, no, no. Please. Let's just complete this transaction and...

I think that that's probably wise.

And this check had better be like gold, you understand,

or I'm coming back here, because I won this money.

Okay. Okay. Okay.

Are you all right?

Cool it, man. Just cool it.

Please. You're gonna get your money.

You know what?

I don't think I'm going to pay you.

Don't get the guy mad. For heaven's sake, don't get the guy mad.

- Pay the man. - You crazy bitch. Pay me what you owe.

No, I don't think I will. And you know why?

'Cause you can't threaten someone with a squirt gun.

You slut. I can threaten you with anything I goddamn want.

- George. - Shut up.

- George. - What?

I think it's olly, olly in free.

- No, I'm doing fine. - No, George. You blew the gaff.

- I have? - Yes.

I told you a squirt gun wouldn't work.

A squirt gun would have worked. You didn't have to fill it.

What, am I gonna threaten someone with an empty gun?

No, George, you're right. Of course.

You guys are fantastic. What, do you do this for a living?

Ask her. Is she mad?

You're not miffed at us, are you? I mean, nothing personal.

You guys were going to con me out of my money.

- It was only business. - It was only business.

- It was only business, huh? - It's the American way.

I don't know about you folks, but I'm starved.

Anybody care for a snack?

I told you the damn squirt gun wouldn't work.

Aces and jacks, man with the ax, suicide kings.

Well, there you have it.

A sucker born every minute, huh?

And two to take him. Play past it.

Here.

Here's a souvenir of your escape from the con men.

You run a candy store. This is the candy store.

Now, I come into your candy store,

and I give you $20 in singles,

and I say, "Excuse me, miss. Could you please give me a $20 bill?

I have to send a registered letter to my mother."

To your aunt. It's more pathetic. Send it to your aunt.

To my aunt.

And it's addressed, and there's a stamp on it.

You give me a $20 bill. Give me the 20.

And I seal it. And you watch me seal it in the envelope.

Now, I gave you what appeared to be $20 in singles,

but when you count it, there's only 19.

And you say, "I've only got 19."

I've only got 19.

Here, let me count it.

And there are only 19.

"God, I'm sorry. Let me get another dollar from my wife in the car.

Here, hold this a minute."

And I give you the envelope with the $20 in it.

And I take the $19, and I go home. Good-bye.

And that's a little larceny called the Flue.

- I don't get it. - You don't get it?

- You gave me the 20, I gave you the 19. - Yes?

I just won a dollar.

Open the envelope.

That's right.

But I saw you put the $20 bill in there.

No. That's what you thought you saw.

How did you steal the bill?

Secrets of the pyramids.

It's okay, Joe. Show her.

I think we owe her one.

All right. The Flue revealed.

Let's do it again.

I come into your store, and I hand you $20 in singles.

And I say, "Excuse me, miss. Could you please give me a $20 bill?

I have to send a registered letter to my aunt."

And you give me the bill, and I seal it.

And you watch me seal it in the envelope.

A little page in the history of the short con.

It's been very nice talking to you.

- Here's your cab. - Thank you.

Good night.

May I talk to you for a moment?

My friend square with you on the $800?

Well, I thought you'd probably say that.

We struck a bargain. You said watch for the tell and you'd cancel his debt.

Are you a man of your word?

- All right. He's square. - May I have the IOU?

Hey, you're right.

What's right is right.

Thank you.

What's your name, by the way?

Thank you for a lovely evening.

You're a lovely woman.

Good night.

Come back anytime you'd enjoy some more excitement.

Let's go.

He said, "I can make any woman a whore in 15 minutes."

And what did you say to that?

I said he couldn't make anybody a whore that was not a whore to start out with.

He said, "I've been reading your mail,

and you are that whore."

Then...

'Cause he didn't realize what he had done.

And what had he done?

You know, I know there are people who are normal.

Are there?

Yes, there are.

- But... - But what?

But I don't know what those people do.

It's all right, darling. It's all right.

No. It's not all right.

It never was all right.

How can you live when you've done something...

Inhalation therapist to Room 316.

Inhalation therapist, Room 316.

Maria. I have to talk to you.

Uh, you excuse me?

Thank you.

Why do we listen to their troubles when we can't help them?

Oh, you have been talking to your murderess.

I know why she is in the hospital. She's sick.

The question is, what am I doing in there?

It's a sham. It's a con game. Nothing that I say will help her.

And there's nothing I can learn from her to help others avoid her mistakes.

That poor girl.

All her life, my father tells her she's a whore, so all her life...

- Your father? - I'm sorry?

You said your father says that she's a whore.

- I said "my father"? - Yes.

You remember what your friend told you yesterday?

Don't work so hard.

Do something that gives you satisfaction,

something that you always enjoy.

What do you really enjoy?

- What do I enjoy? - Yes.

I enjoyed writing my book.

Well, then write another book.

And in the short term, you come to my house for dinner tonight.

Will you do that?

I'm sorry. I can't come tonight.

Now, tonight you, uh... Forgive me for asking.

You have something to do that gives you enjoyment?

Yes, I think so.

Ah, that's good.

You need joy.

Mm-hmm.

You come back to play some pool?

- I'm looking for Mike. - Mike ain't here.

Try down at Charlie's.

Thank you.

♪ Inside I'm crying ♪

- ♪ 'Cause this true love stopped for you ♪ - Help you?

- ♪ But not for me ♪ - Drinking?

Scotch and water.

♪ Alone at home ♪

♪ I sit and stare ♪

♪ Afraid to leave ♪

- ♪ 'Cause you'll be there ♪ - There you go, gentlemen.

♪ When you walk by ♪

♪ I stop and cry ♪

♪ I turn away ♪

♪ So you won 't see ♪

♪ When true love ends ♪

♪ You say we're friends ♪

- Scotch and water. - Thank you.

- You pay now. - How much is it?

Well, like most things, it's negotiable.

Oldest trick in the book. Never fails.

Not good for much of anything, but still of great historical interest.

- Hiya. - Hi.

It's good to see you. Did I ever tell you my name? My name is Mike.

- Glad to meet you. - Well, I'm glad to meet you too.

- I have a proposition for you. - And what's your name?

Listen to this. How would you feel if someone were to do a study of...

a study of the confidence game?

And someone were to talk to you and learn your views and watch how you operate?

- A study of? - Yes.

- For what? - For my own reasons.

- What are you, a journalist? - I'm a writer. I'm a sort of writer.

You're a sort of writer, and that's why you came back here? To write?

- How would you feel about that? - What did you come back here for?

I came back here to write. I came back here...

- I would like to see how you operate. - Is that the idea?

You want to see how a true bad man plies his trade?

Yes.

All right.

- You'll call me when it comes in? - Yes, sir.

Thank you.

The basic idea is this.

It's called a confidence game. Why?

Because you give me your confidence? No.

Because I give you mine.

How do you get money when you have no money?

Watch closely. This is called short con.

Would you please check again, please? Howard. Martin Howard.

- Money order for $300. - It hasn't come in yet.

- As I told you, sir, the moment... - It was supposed to arrive this afternoon.

- The moment it arrives... - All right, all right. Thank you.

I'm expecting some money.

- Sergeant John Moran. - One moment. Moran?

- Yes, sir. - No, I'm sorry. It hasn't come in yet.

They told me definitely by 9:00.

If you'll have a seat, I'll let you know the moment it arrives.

Thank you.

Can you beat that?

Can you beat this? I've been waiting here since...

Honey? Since three o'clock this afternoon.

No.

Three o'clock this afternoon.

I got my car stolen, my wallet.

The kid's in the hotel room, hasn't eaten since noon.

- They told me I'd have my money by 9:00. - I swear to God.

I've got to pick up a bus ticket.

- When's the bus leaving? - Not till 6:00, but I gotta pick up the ticket.

- Where you going? - Back to Pendleton.

You're in the corps?

Joe, I was in the corps.

- When were you in? - '68- '70.

Yeah, I was there.

- Marty Howard. - John Moran.

John.

- Okay, look. What do you need for the bus? - Forty.

When my money comes in, I'll give you the 40. Go back to the base.

No, I couldn't take that.

The hell. What are you gonna do, miss your formation?

I'll lend you the 40. When you get back to the base, send it back.

- Um... - No, you get on that bus.

- Thank you. - Nothing to it. You'd do the same for me.

- If my money comes in first, you take... - No, we'll be all right.

- No. If my money comes in first... - No, I couldn't do that.

Moran.

Can I see some ID, please?

Thank you.

Now that man is going to give his money to a total stranger.

Now, you've got to take some money from me. I want you to take it.

- What do you need? - No, we'll get by.

No, wait.

You tell me. What do you need? I've got it right here.

Save your money, Joe. Semper Fi.

What's more fun than human nature?

- Well, you learn something new every day. - Ain't it the truth?

- You impressed? - So you can't cheat an honest man.

That's probably true,

but what we've just seen is the operation of a slightly different philosophic principle.

- Which is? - Don't trust nobody.

Were you in the marines?

You see, everybody gets something out of every transaction.

I give that guy my confidence. I ask him for help.

And what he gets is he feels like he's a good man.

Now, what do you get out of this transaction?

- I told you. - Did you?

Yes, I said that I wanted...

You want to know a tell?

I'll show you another one.

Give me your hand.

Think of a finger.

Think of one.

- You're thinking of one? - Yes.

Okay.

I'm gonna tell you which finger you're thinking of.

Do you think I can do that?

- This one. - Yes. How did you know?

How did I know? 'Cause you were thinking of it.

- Do you want to make love with me? - Excuse me?

Because you're blushing. That's a tell.

The things we think, the things we want,

we can do them or not do them, but we can't hide them.

What is it you think I want?

I'll tell ya.

Somebody to come along,

somebody to possess you...

to take you into a new thing.

Would you like that?

Do you want that?

Yes.

What is it?

Yes.

That's good.

- Good evening. May I help you, sir? - A room.

- Your name, please. - Richard White.

Mr. White.

- You have a reservation? - No, I don't.

I'm sorry, Mr. White, but the entire hotel is booked up with the apparel show.

- Good night. - Good night, Mr. Dean.

- You have nothing? - No, I'm sorry, we don't.

Who's that man? Is that the manager?

Uh, no, sir. The manager is away from the desk at the moment, but I assure you that the hotel...

That's all right. Thank you.

- I'm sorry. If you could just check back... - That's perfectly all right.

What if the...

What if the man comes back?

He had on a tuxedo. We would believe he's going out for the evening.

- What if he does? - I don't think so.

And if he does, we deal with that thing then.

In or out?

We should be leaving.

You said he wasn't coming back.

Probably not. But why should we wait for him?

Some people would say that you're an interesting man.

I'm a con man.

That's what I am. I'm a criminal.

You don't have to delude yourself.

You can call things what they are.

You can call yourself what you are.

What am I?

Listen to me.

'Cause there are a lot of things in the world,

and there are many sides to each of us...

good blood, bad blood.

Somehow all those parts have got to speak.

You know what I'm talking about.

The burden of responsibility has become too great.

- It's true, isn't it? - Yes, it is.

Babe, I know that it is.

I read a book once which said this:

If you're fired from your job, when you're going home, take something.

A pencil... something to assert yourself.

Take a memento.

Take something from life.

I think what draws you to me is this.

I'm not afraid to examine the rules

and to assert myself.

And I think you aren't either.

Do you really think so?

Yes, that's exactly what I think.

I'm gonna wash up.

And then let's get out of this guy's room.

Let's get outta here.

- Taxi this evening, sir? - No, thank you.

- I want to see you again. - Well, I hope so.

We'll do that soon.

- I have to go. - Can I go with you where you're going?

- Where do you have to be? - I've actually got to be right here at...

Christ. What time is it?

- What is it? - Look. Look.

You remember Joey from last night?

- Your friend. - The guy in the bow tie.

Slowly... Slowly look over my left shoulder and tell me if you see him.

Yes. He's just crossing the street.

- Oh, Christ. - What is it?

There's a bit that I'm supposed to do here.

Okay. Okay, I'm gonna call you. Soon.

- Let me do this with you. - No, babe. Good-bye.

- You're getting into the frame-up. - Let me do this with you.

No! This is not a game. We're about to sting this guy.

I'll do it with you. Please. Let me do it with you. Just tell me what to do.

Aw, babe, you're mucking up my timing.

Come on.

You're my wife. You follow my cue. Whatever I do, don't volunteer anything.

Taxi!

However strange things seem, keep your mouth shut.

And the only one you know is me.

The airport. And hurry.

Going to the conference tomorrow morning?

Wouldn't miss it.

Wait for the light. They'll ticket you for jaywalking.

Oh, yeah. I've been in this town before.

- Fella left his briefcase. - Sorry?

Fella left his briefcase.

Well, he probably came from the hotel.

Let's, um, take it back and...

Holy Christ.

Oh, my God.

I'd better get this...

I suppose I'd better get this back to the hotel.

Let's, uh...

Let's... Let's just talk about this for one moment.

I'm with you.

Now, look, look, look. This has got to be stolen money.

I understand. But how do we know that?

What are you, nuts? There's $80,000 in the goddamn bag.

- Who's gonna be carrying that... - That's right.

...carrying that kind of money in a bag in the middle of the night?

- That's absolutely right. - And...

And there's no goddamn way I'm giving that money to the police.

- Why should we? So some cops can split it? - That's absolutely right.

I'm not gonna do it. And I'm not gonna let you do it.

All right, now let's just stop pussyfootin' around here.

This is the central proposition. This money fell into our laps.

There is no way we're gonna give it back.

So we all know what we're gonna do, so let's just face the goddamn facts.

'Cause we know we're gonna split the money, so let's just do it.

I, uh...

I work in a bank.

We don't wanna hear about your personal problems.

Will you just shut up for a second? Listen to what I'm gonna tell you.

I work in a bank.

If this money's clean... If it's clean, if it's not counterfeit, I say this.

I say we split it up.

And we split it up down the middle and we walk away, and this never happened.

That's what I say.

That's what I've been saying for the last three hours.

I'll take the money to the bank. And tomorrow...

Excuse me. Are you nuts? Do you think we're insane?

Listen to what I'm gonna say. We keep this money intact. We don't touch it.

I check it out.

If it's hot, we... we sit on it for six months, a year.

- And you keep the money all this time? - Listen to what I'm gonna tell you.

I can go to my bank tomorrow morning, here, in town,

and I can get...

I can get $10,000, $20,000 clean money... my money.

I'll give you a bank check.

I keep the briefcase, you keep my money.

- We keep your money. - Yes.

Wait a second. Wait a second. Back up, back up.

I'll go to my bank. I'll go to my bank, all right?

I'll get $30,000, and I'll get the thing checked out.

I'll give you my money, and I'll take the briefcase, you son of a bitch.

Who's he think he's dealing with here, for Christ's sake?

I'm gonna wash up. I'm gonna change my shirt, and then we'll go.

- Keep an eye on the, uh... - Go on. Don't worry.

- You awake? - Yeah.

- How you doin'? - Fine.

Got a little bit more than you bargained for, huh?

- What's happened? - Yeah.

I don't understand how this works.

Okay, I'm gonna tell ya.

The mark gets dressed. We take him to the bank.

Don't include the broad in it, Mike. Are you nuts? You had to drag her along?

Leave it be. She doesn't have to know how we do this.

Be cool, Joey. It's almost over. It's going good.

Don't mouth it. It's going how it's going. You were a fool to have brought the broad.

Be that as it may, you make a deal with the mark.

Gets to ship the briefcase to himself in, uh... Where's he from?

- Baltimore. - From Baltimore.

Now, why do we let him do that?

Because before he does, he goes to a bank here

and gives us $30,000 as collateral so that we trust him.

Just before we send him the briefcase, we switch it on him,

and we've got his $30,000.

If it's phony money in the case, why do you have to switch it?

Who said it was phony money? It's real. That's the beauty of the thing.

We're showing the guy 80,000 real dollars.

We borrowed the money from the hard guys for one night. Tonight we give it back.

How's he doing?

He's changing his shirt. We got a couple of minutes.

I hope you enjoyed your evening. You have seen sights that few have seen.

You were a goddamn fool to bring her along.

It's over, Joe. It's all right.

You did real good.

Okay, time to go.

- Let's take it to the bank. - Better get your jacket.

Coming out in about five minutes.

We'll be coming out in five minutes.

Not as far as I can determine. Negative. None of them are armed.

We'll act as if they are, in any case.

Roger.

When you come in, have a female officer go for the woman,

get her down on the ground and frisk her good.

I don't know who she is, and I don't trust her.

I'll take the young guy, you take the old.

I got it.

The signal is I clear my throat.

Say again.

- And that's at the bank? - Yes, at the bank.

- He's a cop. - What?

He's a cop. I heard him on the walkie-talkie.

- Oh, my God. We gotta get her out of here. - You'd bloody better well believe it.

- Hold it. Briefcase. - Got it.

What did we forget?

Good. Come on.

Where are you going?

- It's just my wife. She's got a cough. - No, no, no. Hold on.

- We're gonna stay with you. She... - Nobody goes anywhere.

- She's very ill. - Police. Don't move.

- I told you, my wife is ill. - Move back, get on the floor, sit on your hands.

- You're under arrest. It's all over for today. - No.

You move, and I'll blow your goddamn head off.

I've gotta get out of here.

- Uh-uh. - No.

How is he?

Yeah, he's dead.

I can't be here.

Why'd you have to kill him? Are you out of your mind?

We've got about seconds to get outta here.

- A straight bitch and she panicked. - Shut up. Go check the door.

Come on.

- Stairs. - Go.

They're out there.

She's killed us, man.

The bitch has killed us dead.

Steal the car.

I can't do that.

Do you wanna spend the rest of your life in jail?

Or do you wanna get us out of here?

We need you to steal the car.

All my life, Mike... All my life, I never had a moment's violence.

Never saw a moment's violence.

Forget it. Wipe it down, and let's get outta here.

I swear to God. And you had to bring your square-john broad into it.

- You had to bring your trick into the game. - Okay, okay. It's happened.

It's something that happened.

- It was an accident. - An accident?

Goddamn you! You broke the first rule!

I should've turned around the first moment you brought the broad!

I brought the broad? Who brought the goddamn cop?

- Where did you get the cop? - I found him at the apparel show.

- He looked like a businessman. - Okay, okay. Shut up.

- He looked... - I said shut up!

We're gonna get the car wiped down.

In a couple minutes, we'll be out of here and we're home clean.

None of this ever happened.

You go home, nobody even knows your name, and it's all over.

We give the mob back their money...

Where's the briefcase?

You had it.

You had it at the garage.

- You had the briefcase. - I thought we put it in the car.

- Where is it, Joe? - It isn't there.

- What does this mean? - I'm sorry, Mike. I swear.

- When we were in the garage... - Shut up. Let me think for a second.

What does it mean?

I'm sorry, Mike. I was scared.

You were scared? You son of a bitch! You've killed us!

What does it mean?

It means we've lost $90,000 we borrowed from the mob.

If we don't pay it back tonight, they turn us over for that cop we killed.

- I can give you the money. - You got senile, old man.

- I can give you the money. - I need $80,000 by this evening.

- I'll get it. I'll give it to you. - You have that kind of money?

I can get it.

Then, for God sakes, get it.

Funny how things happen sometimes.

- I'm sorry, Mike. - Get in.

- I'll tell 'em... - They know what happened.

You don't have to tell 'em a goddamn thing.

Start for the airport.

What happens now?

What's gonna happen is this.

Joey gives the money back to the mob, and then he goes away.

I'm gonna go away.

You're gonna stay here 'cause you have a life here.

Nobody knows who you are. They can't trace you.

If you don't tell them, then they don't know.

Listen to me.

You're gonna get a strong urge to confess to thievery, to murder.

You're gonna want to confess.

Don't do it.

What happened was an accident. The fact that you were there was an accident.

You did nothing wrong.

So you go and forget it.

I...

I just wish...

Stop the cab.

Inversion, projection,

compression, elaboration are devices...

Excuse me.

...for the transposition...

Projection, inversion,

compression and elaboration

are devices for transforming...

in the joke...

Maggie.

Maggie!

What is it? What is it, darling?

- Come inside. - No.

- No. I... - What?

- I have to talk to you. - What? Anything. What is it?

You know... You know the dream where you've done something terrible,

some... some... and you're going to die,

and you say, "I wish this was a dream."

Maggie darling, come inside, sit down and tell me.

No. Listen to me. No.

And if you reveal yourself, you betray someone else, and...

When you have done something unforgivable.

Yes.

When you have done something unforgivable, I'll tell you exactly what to do.

You forgive yourself.

It isn't as if you'd killed somebody.

Dr. Littauer? Excuse me. I'm sorry.

Dr. Ford. Do I have the wrong day? Am I here on the...

I'm very sorry. I'm very sorry. I'm quite ill. I have to cancel.

- Are you all right? - Didn't I just tell you?

What did I just say?

No calls through under any circumstances.

Call my appointments for today and cancel them.

Dr. Ford?

Dr. Ford?

Dr. Ford, it's Billy Hahn.

What do you want?

I tried to call.

I had to cancel my appointment tomorrow. They said you weren't taking any calls.

I have to go away for several days.

Yes, I think it's best if we suspended treatment for a while.

I stopped by to tell you that I would be gone and couldn't come tomorrow.

Yes.

Thank you.

- Are you all right? - Yes.

Could I speak to Bill, please?

Right. I'll hold.

Bill. Yeah. How's it going?

Real good.

What? Oh, yeah!

Hey, well, that's really good news, man. I'm always glad to hear that.

Yeah.

Excuse me.

I just won $5,000 on a baseball game.

- How 'bout givin' me a taste? - Oh, man.

I would give you a taste if you'd make a bet sometime. You're so fuckin' cheap.

- How come I always gotta play the straight man? - Hey, man, think about it.

- Think about what? - Sit down, man.

- Who filled the goddamn water pistol? - I did.

You're turning into Sarah Bernhardt, man.

That water pistol made a puddle big enough to swim in.

- That's the point, isn't it? - A taste for the theatrical.

You don't know the half of it. He threw his arm out battin' that bitch around.

- He hit her? - Oh, yeah.

Slam-bang on the breeze-oad.

He put the slam-bang on my forehead. Look at this fuckin' bruise you gave me.

What do you pay for? It's realism.

- So, is she gonna stand up? - Well, like you said, she's on tilt.

But I don't think she's gonna beef to the cops.

So do you want me to send him back to have him check on her again?

No, I think she'll stand up. Pay the kid off.

- Keep him a little scared. - Oh, yeah.

Mike, how did you know she was gonna go for it?

Go for it? Hey, the broad's an addict.

This is great. This is fantastic. Listen to this.

- The bitch, when we were dressing the room... - When you were dressing my hotel room?

- Spreading some personal junk on the bureau. - We put some personal stuff up on the bureau.

- Uh-huh? - Yeah?

Yeah.

- So it'll look like somebody's in the room. - Get this. Listen to this.

I leave some stuff... I leave 40, 50 bucks up on the desk.

Now, the broad steals my pocketknife.

- No. - The broad... My hand to God!

- She boosts my lucky pocketknife. - Can you beat that?

- The bitch is a booster. - The bitch is a born thief, man.

- So you had her made from the jump? - I'm tellin' you, a ton of fuckin' bricks.

- "Show me some real con men." - Yeah, we showed her some con men.

We showed her some dinosaur con men, some old-style.

Yes, sir.

Years from now, they're gonna have to go to a museum to see a frame like this.

- That's right. - Took her money and screwed her too.

A small price to pay.

We took out for the hotel... two hotel rooms.

Speaking of which, $300 for your hotel room?

Always show a little front. You taught me that yourself, Mike.

Oh, you're such a flatterer.

Spend 300 to make 80,000?

Mike, you are the ringtail rounder.

- You are King Kong. - One riot, one ranger.

- You put that bitch in the panic bag. - Hey, baby, this is my road game.

- What's next? - For me? A vacation.

I'm goin' to Vegas tonight on the ten o'clock. You wanna come?

- Quittin' winners this time. - Miss ya.

What did I say? Got the two hotel rooms.

52.90 for two policemen's uniforms.

Twenty-five dollars we gave the parking lot attendant

and 500 to the kid.

Give me a running total.

Mike. Mike, what are you... Why are you here?

- We can't be here. - What are you doing here?

Listen. Listen. They're following me.

- They're following me. - They are?

- Yes. I tried to... - Wait a second.

Vegas Air Flight 182 departing for Las Vegas...

- Look, we can't be seen together. - Don't leave me. I'm so glad you're here.

- You're in no danger. - I told you, they're waiting for me.

There were men... There were policemen following me.

What are you doing here? I thought you'd gone.

I couldn't get on the right flight. Now look.

If they haven't followed you here, then you have some time.

- But we have to split up. - No, I can't.

- Yes. - No, don't leave me.

- This is a godsend that you're here. - I'm gonna tell you where I'm going.

- We'll meet there. We'll take separate flights. - No, no.

No, no, no. I'm so frightened.

And, Mike. Mike, I...

I took all my money...

I took all my money out of the bank. I'm...

And you'll help us disappear. We'll disappear together.

Mike, I've got a quarter of a million dollars.

We can live. We can...

I can't believe I'm seeing you.

Do you think you were followed to the airport?

I don't know. I'm frightened all the time.

- I saw them. I went to the bank. - Yes, I see.

Then I waited to throw them off before I went to the airport.

- Good. - I bought my ticket in another name.

I think that's wise.

My real name is Margaret.

Margaret. We'll get out of this, I promise you.

- Yes. - I'll get us out of the country.

- Yes. - We need a plan.

I've got you.

- It was fate I found you. - Yes, it was.

- Because together... - Yes, we can.

And when I saw them... When I saw that they came after me...

It's all right now. You're safe.

No, I knew that I was being punished.

No. It was an accident. No.

No, I knew that I was bad.

You know why? You know when I knew?

Because I took your knife. That's when I knew.

- What knife? - Your knife from the hotel room.

And I said, "That's why it happened. Yes, because I'm bad. Because I stole."

What is it?

Mike, what is it?

Oh, you're a bad pony, and I'm not gonna bet on you.

Mike.

You see...

the thing of it is, you just said my knife.

- I don't understand. - My knife.

You said you took my knife from the hotel room.

You see, in my trade, this is called, what you did...

You cracked out of turn. Huh?

You see? You crumbed the play.

My knife.

What do you want? What do you fuckin' want from me?

You want your 80 grand back? I can't give it back. I split it up.

What do you want? Revenge?

- I gave you my trust. - Of course you gave me your trust.

That's what I do for a living.

You asked me what I did for a living. This is it.

Look... Look, I'm sorry. I'm sorry I hurt you.

Really. You're a good kid.

Now, whatever it is you feel that you have to do...

- Sit down, please. - I'd love to, but I...

I said to sit down.

- What are you gonna do, go to the cops? - I may.

And tell 'em what? What are you gonna tell 'em, stud?

That the author of the best-selling Driven: A Guide to Compulsive Beha vior

gave her fortune away to some con man?

You see my point?

But we've had fun. You must say that.

I said to sit down.

If you walk out that door, I'm going to kill you.

I don't believe you.

What is life without adventure?

What? What do you want me to do?

You took my money.

- How naughty of me. - You raped me.

- Is that what I did? - You took me under false pretenses.

Golly, Margaret, well, that's just what happened then, isn't it?

Okay, look, you got stung, and you're hurt.

I can understand that. You're stuck, and you're steamin'.

I want to know how you could do what you did to me.

It wasn't personal. Okay?

And funny as that sounds, I'm sorry that it happened, but it did.

We've all gotta live in an imperfect world.

- You used me. - I used you. I did. I'm sorry.

And you learned some things about yourself that you'd rather not know.

I'm sorry for that too.

You say I acted atrociously.

Yes, I did.

I do it for a living.

You sit down!

You can't bluff someone who's not paying attention.

Are you nuts?

- What are you, nuts? - I want you to beg me.

Fuck you. I'm not gonna beg you for a goddamn thing.

- Beg me. - It's a goddamn bluff.

You're all bluff. What, are you gonna kill me and then go to jail?

Give up all that good shit that you have? Your best seller? That doctor stuff?

All that stuff you're trying so hard to protect? You're gonna give that up?

It's not my pistol. I was never here.

Beg for your life, or I'm going to kill you.

Hey... No.

I can't help it. I'm out of control.

- Hey. No, I... - Beg me for your life.

Hey, fuck you! This is what you always wanted, you crooked bitch! You thief!

You always need to get caught 'cause you know you're bad.

I never hurt anybody. I never shot anybody.

You sought this out. This is what you always wanted.

I knew it the first time you came in.

You're worthless, you know it?

You're a whore. You came back like a dog to its own vomit.

You sick bitch! I'm not gonna give you shit!

Thank you, sir. May I have another?

Are you Dr. Margaret Ford?

Yes, I am.

Would you sign my book?

I'd be delighted.

Maggie! Darling!

I missed you.

How are you?

- I'm fine. Really fine. - Are you?

Yes, I absolutely am.

Good. Come.

I'm so happy you are back.

Now we'll sit down,

and then you'll tell me everything.

Please.

Do you know how frightened I was for you before your trip?

It was just the strain. I had my book coming out and...

No, no. I know.

But something... There was something on your mind.

- You were... - That's right.

And you said, "When you've done something unforgivable,

you must forgive yourself."

And that's what I've done, and it's done.

Good. Good.

Oh. Now, what are we going to eat?

What did you eat down there?

Dr. Littauer, you're wanted on the phone.

Oh. Sorry, darling.

Please, order for me.

Excuse me.

Yes?

Could you tell me what that is on the buffet?

- A Waldorf salad. - Thank you.