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[ UP-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYS ]
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>> Uncle Grandpa: GOOD MORNING!
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GOOD MORNING.
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GOOD MORNING.
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>> GRFT: [ ROARS ]
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>> Uncle Grandpa: GOOD MORNING.
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GOOD MORNING!
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>>
MOST COMMONLY FOUND IN
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FRESHWATER RESERVOIRS SUCH AS
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SWAMPS AND LAKES, THE FEMALE
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ALLIGATOR MEASURES ABOUT NINE
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FEET IN LENGTH AND IS ARMORED
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WITH BONY PLATES THAT RUN ALL
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THE WAY DOWN THEIR MUSCULAR,
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FLAT TAIL.
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THESE BEAUTIFUL REPTILES HAVE
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BEEN LIVING ON EARTH FOR
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MILLIONS OF YEARS AND SOMETIMES
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REFERRED TO AS "LIVING
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FOSSILS."
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>> Uncle Grandpa: WHATCHA
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WATCHING?
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>> Mr. Gus: AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!
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>>
AND IN OTHER NEWS, WE'RE
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SEEING A HEAVY INCLINE IN
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TOOTHPASTE PRICES.
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>> Uncle Grandpa: DIDN'T MEAN TO
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STARTLE YOU, MR. GUS.
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JUST WANT TO KNOW WHAT YOU'RE
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WATCHING.
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>> Mr. Gus: THE NEWS!
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I'M WATCHING THE NEWS!
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OBVIOUSLY.
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WHAT'S IT TO YOU?
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>> Uncle Grandpa: WELL, AS YOU
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KNOW, IT'S 3:00, WHICH MEANS
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IT'S TIME FOR MY FAVORITE TV
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SHOW.
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SO IF YOU'LL KINDLY HAND ME THE
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REMOTE CONTROL.
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>> Mr. Gus: SORRY TO INTERRUPT
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YOUR SCHEDULE, BUT AS YOU CAN
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SEE, I WAS HERE FIRST!
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HEY!
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>>
HEY, DEBBIE, DID YOU SEE
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KEVIN TODAY?
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>>
ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
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OF COURSE I DID!
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>>
OH, SHH!
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HERE HE COMES!
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>>
HI, KEVIN!
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>>
HEY, LADIES!
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LOOK AT ME!
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Y'ALL SEEN MY MUSCLES LATELY?
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THEY BIG, HUH?
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[
SMOOCHES]
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OKAY, I'M SICK OF YOU LAME
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GIRLS NOW.
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[
BOTH GIGGLE]
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>>
SO CUTE, RIGHT?!
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>>
RIGHT?
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[
BOTH GIGGLE]
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[
BOTH SHRIEK]
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>> Uncle Grandpa: KEVIN IS SO
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HOT.
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>> Mr. Gus: WE'RE NOT WATCHING
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THIS.
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>> Uncle Grandpa: AW, COME ON!
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>> Mr. Gus: I ONLY WATCH THINGS
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THAT ARE INTELLECTUALLY
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CHALLENGING.
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>> Uncle Grandpa: ARE YOU SAYING
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"TEENAGE FART THROB" ISN'T
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INTELLECTUAL?
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>> Mr. Gus: THAT'S
EXACTLYWHAT
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I'M SAYING.
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>> Uncle Grandpa: HEY, DON'T
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CHANGE THE CHANNEL!
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IT'S THE BEST PART!
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COME ON, MR. GUS, PLEASE!
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>> Mr. Gus: NO!
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YOU CAN WATCH YOUR SHOW LATER!
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[ INDISTINCT ARGUING ]
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>> Pizza Steve: HEY, GUYS,
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WHAT'S --
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>> Uncle Grandpa: OOPS!
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SORRY, PIZZA STEVE!
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I DIDN'T SEE YOU THERE.
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>> Pizza Steve: [ GROANS ]
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GEEZ, MAN.
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WHAT ARE YOU GUYS ALL BENT OUT
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OF SHAPE ABOUT?
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>> Mr. Gus: I WAS BUSY WATCHING
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THE NEWS AND UNCLE GRANDPA CAME
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SNEAKING UP ON ME AND STARTED
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CHANGING THE CHANNEL AND JUNK.
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HMM.
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>> Uncle Grandpa: HEY, YOU KNOW
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VERY WELL IT'S
MYTV TIME!
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YOU CAN WATCH YOUR DUMB
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"CROCODILE VIDEOS" ON YOUR OWN
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DUMB TIME.
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>> Mr. Gus: WHA-WHATEVER!
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I WAS HERE FIRST!
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>> Uncle Grandpa: IS THAT RIGHT?
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>> Mr. Gus: YEAH, THAT'S RIGHT!
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>> Uncle Grandpa: IS THAT REALLY
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RIGHT?
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>> Mr. Gus: REALLY, REALLY
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RIGHT!
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>> Uncle Grandpa: OH, SO IT'S
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RIGHT THEN, HUH?
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>> Mr. Gus: OH, IT'S CRAZY
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RIGHT!
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[ INDISTINCT ARGUING ]
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>> Pizza Steve: WHOA! WHOA!
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WHOA!
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BEFORE YOU TWO GO RIPPING EACH
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OTHER'S HEADS OFF, PIZZA STEVE
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HAS A SOLUTION TO YOUR PROBLEM.
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YOU GUYS FAMILIAR WITH THE
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ANCIENT ART OF...LEG WRESTLING?!
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>> Mr. Gus: YOU WANT US TO LEG
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WRESTLE FOR THE REMOTE CONTROL?
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>> Uncle Grandpa: AND WHOEVER
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WINS GETS TO WATCH WHATEVER THEY
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WANT?!
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YOU'RE SO SMART, PIZZA STEVE!
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>> Pizza Steve: [ GIGGLES ]
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OKAY, SO IF YOU WANT THIS BAD
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BOY, YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO USE
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THESE BAD BOYS!
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>> Uncle Grandpa: BUT,
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PIZZA STEVE, I DON'T KNOW THE
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FIRST THING ABOUT LEG WRESTLING.
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>> Pizza Steve: THAT'S WHY I'M
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GOING TO TRAIN YOU!
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>> Mr. Gus: WELL, WHO'S GONNA
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TRAIN ME?!
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>> Pizza Steve: I'M GONNA TRAIN
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YOU, TOO!
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>> Mr. Gus: AND JUST HOW YOU
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GONNA TRAIN ME AND UNCLE GRANDPA
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AT THE SAME TIME?
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>> Pizza Steve: M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-
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MONTAGE!
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>> Uncle Grandpa: [ GRUNTS ]
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>> Pizza Steve: MM.
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>> Uncle Grandpa: [ GRUNTING ]
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[ GRUNTING ]
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>> Belly Bag: TONIGHT'S
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MATCHUP -- UNCLE GRANDPA VS.
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MR. GUS!
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WINNER GETS TO WATCH WHATEVER
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THEY WANT ON TV!
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>> Pizza Steve: LADIES AND
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GENTLEMEN, GET READY FOR THE
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MOST EXCITING FIGHT OF THE
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CENTURY.
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IN THE LEFT CORNER, WEIGHING IN
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AT 500 POUNDS...
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>> Uncle Grandpa: HEY!
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>> Pizza Steve: ...UNCLE "THIGH
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MEAT CRUSH CRUSH BUBBLE GUM"
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GR-R-R-R-R-R-ANDPA!
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AND IN THE RIGHT CORNER,
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MR. GUS.
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[ CRICKETS CHIRPING ]
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>> Belly Bag: WELL, FOLKS, LOOKS
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LIKE WE HAVE AN EXCITING FIGHT
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TONIGHT.
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>> GRFT: [ ROARS ]
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>> Pizza Steve: ALL RIGHT, BOYS,
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YOU KNOW THE RULES.
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I WANT A GOOD, CLEAN FIGHT,
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NOTHING ABOVE THE BELT.
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[ BELL DINGS ]
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>> Belly Bag: UNCLE GRANDPA
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COMING OUT WITH A STRONG START
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WITH SOME SHIN JABS.
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OOH, MR. GUS ANSWERING WITH A
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MEDITERRANEAN HEEL STOMP.
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UNCLE GRANDPA USES THE
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NATIVE AMERICAN LEG BURNER!
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OH, NO.
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MR. GUS DOES NOT LOOK GOOD.
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[ BELL DINGS ]
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WHAT A GREAT FIRST ROUND, FOLKS!
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TONS OF ACTION!
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>> Pizza Steve: DOING GREAT,
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KID.
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JUST LIKE WE PRACTICED.
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>> Uncle Grandpa: YEAH, I FEEL
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GOOD ABOUT THIS.
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>> Pizza Steve: COME ON,
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MR. GUS.
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YOU GONNA LET HIM PLAY YOU LIKE
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THAT?
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>> Mr. Gus: MAYBE IF YOU
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ACTUALLY TRAINED ME INSTEAD OF
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MAKING ME DO YOUR CHORES AND BE
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YOUR PERSONAL SLAVE.
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>> Pizza Steve: FORGET ABOUT
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THAT.
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HERE'S WHAT YOU GOT TO DO.
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[ WHISPERS INDISTINCTLY ]
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>> Mr. Gus: [ CHUCKLES ]
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[ BELL DINGS ]
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>> Belly Bag: ROUND TWO, AND
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UNCLE GRANDPA IS USING THE SAME
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SHIN JAB STRATEGY.
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AMAZING!
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MR. GUS IS TAKING A BEATING BUT
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DOESN'T SEEM TO CARE!
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>> Uncle Grandpa: [ GRUNTING ]
216
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>> Belly Bag: WAIT, WHAT'S THIS?
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MR. GUS HAS USED THE
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DINO-SKIN-SHED MANEUVER!
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THE REAL MR. GUS IS BEHIND
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UNCLE GRANDPA!
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UNCLE GRANDPA TRYING TO MAKE A
222
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RUN FOR IT.
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OH, NO!
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A FLAT TIRE!
225
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UNCLE GRANDPA DESPERATELY TRYING
226
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TO PUT HIS SHOE BACK ON.
227
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MR. GUS WITH THE HOOK, LINE, AND
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SWEEPER!
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>> Pizza Steve: 1...2...
230
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>> Belly Bag: WILL UNCLE GRANDPA
231
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BE ABLE TO RECOVER?
232
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[ BELL DINGS ]
233
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LOOKS LIKE UNCLE GRANDPA WAS
234
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SAVED BY THE BELL!
235
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>> Uncle Grandpa: HE'S JUST TOO
236
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SMART FOR ME.
237
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>> Pizza Steve: YOU GONNA LET
238
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HIM STOP YOU FROM WATCHING YOUR
239
00:06:45,007 --> 00:06:46,017
FAVORITE SHOW?!
240
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>> Uncle Grandpa: YOU'RE RIGHT.
241
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HE ALWAYS GETS TO WATCH WHATEVER
242
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HE WANTS!
243
00:06:49,023 --> 00:06:50,023
>> Pizza Steve: THAT'S THE
244
00:06:51,001 --> 00:06:51,011
SPIRIT!
245
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BREAK A LEG!
246
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>> Uncle Grandpa: YEAH!
247
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WAIT, WHAT?
248
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>> Pizza Steve: GREAT WORK,
249
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MR. GUS.
250
00:06:56,017 --> 00:06:58,007
LOOKS LIKE ALL THAT MASSAGING ME
251
00:06:58,016 --> 00:06:59,006
PAID OFF!
252
00:06:59,012 --> 00:07:01,012
NOW GO OUT THERE AND KICK SOME
253
00:07:01,016 --> 00:07:02,006
LEG!
254
00:07:02,007 --> 00:07:03,007
>> Mr. Gus: YEAH.
255
00:07:03,010 --> 00:07:05,010
THAT REMOTE IS MINE!
256
00:07:05,009 --> 00:07:06,009
>> Belly Bag: BUT FIRST, A WORD
257
00:07:06,012 --> 00:07:07,012
FROM OUR SPONSORS.
258
00:07:07,007 --> 00:07:07,997
>> Uncle Grandpa: HEY, I'M
259
00:07:08,003 --> 00:07:10,003
UNCLE GRANDPA -- EIGHT-TIME LEG
260
00:07:10,003 --> 00:07:11,023
WRESTLING FEDERATION CHAMPION.
261
00:07:11,023 --> 00:07:13,003
AND LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING.
262
00:07:13,006 --> 00:07:14,016
YOU DON'T GET LEGS LIKE THESE
263
00:07:15,001 --> 00:07:17,021
OR BUNS LIKE THESE FROM EATING
264
00:07:17,019 --> 00:07:20,009
TRASH LIKE THIS.
265
00:07:20,010 --> 00:07:22,010
THE WAY TO MAXIMIZE HEALTH AND
266
00:07:22,009 --> 00:07:23,019
LEG POWER IS JUICING YOUR
267
00:07:23,022 --> 00:07:24,022
VEGETABLES!
268
00:07:24,021 --> 00:07:25,021
[ GRUNTS ]
269
00:07:26,000 --> 00:07:27,020
JUST LOOK AT THAT AWESOME GREEN
270
00:07:28,001 --> 00:07:29,001
VIBRANCE.
271
00:07:29,004 --> 00:07:30,014
NOW, DOESN'T THAT LOOK
272
00:07:30,010 --> 00:07:31,010
DELICIOUS, TOMMY?
273
00:07:31,011 --> 00:07:32,021
>> UH...
274
00:07:32,023 --> 00:07:33,023
>> Uncle Grandpa: GET JUICED!
275
00:07:33,023 --> 00:07:34,013
[ BELL DINGS ]
276
00:07:34,012 --> 00:07:36,012
>> Belly Bag: FINAL ROUND!
277
00:07:36,007 --> 00:07:37,017
UNCLE GRANDPA WITH THE TOLEDO
278
00:07:37,022 --> 00:07:38,022
TOE TICKLER!
279
00:07:38,018 --> 00:07:39,998
>> Mr. Gus: [ GIGGLING ]
280
00:07:40,002 --> 00:07:41,012
>> Belly Bag: MR. GUS WITH THE
281
00:07:41,015 --> 00:07:44,995
ALABAMA HOTFOOT!
282
00:07:45,004 --> 00:07:47,014
THE NIGERIAN NAIL FILE!
283
00:07:47,012 --> 00:07:49,012
>> Mr. Gus: MY CUTICLES!
284
00:07:49,008 --> 00:07:50,008
>> Belly Bag: OOH!
285
00:07:50,008 --> 00:07:52,018
CANADIAN CALF CRUNCH!
286
00:07:52,021 --> 00:07:56,011
THE SOMALIAN SNAKE CHARMER!
287
00:07:56,009 --> 00:07:59,019
THE CALIFORNIA SWIMMER'S SHAVE!
288
00:07:59,021 --> 00:08:03,011
THE TUSCANY TOE FLOSSER!
289
00:08:03,016 --> 00:08:03,996
OH, MY!
290
00:08:04,004 --> 00:08:04,024
>> Both: HUH?
291
00:08:04,022 --> 00:08:06,012
>> Belly Bag: IT LOOKS LIKE THIS
292
00:08:06,010 --> 00:08:08,020
MATCH IS ALL TIED UP!
293
00:08:08,022 --> 00:08:10,022
ONLY ONE PERSON CAN DECIDE THE
294
00:08:11,000 --> 00:08:12,010
OUTCOME OF THIS ONE!
295
00:08:12,008 --> 00:08:13,008
>> Mr. Gus: HEY, PIZZA STEVE!
296
00:08:13,016 --> 00:08:14,006
>> Uncle Grandpa: WE NEED YOU TO
297
00:08:14,014 --> 00:08:15,014
BREAK THE TIE TO SEE WHO GETS
298
00:08:15,015 --> 00:08:16,015
THE REMOTE.
299
00:08:17,001 --> 00:08:18,011
>> Pizza Steve: SHH.
300
00:08:18,007 --> 00:08:19,997
MY SHOW IS ON.
301
00:08:20,005 --> 00:08:21,005
>>
PREVIOUSLY ON
302
00:08:21,009 --> 00:08:22,009
"OVEN LOVIN'"...
303
00:08:22,012 --> 00:08:23,012
>> Mr. Gus: DID YOU JUST TRICK
304
00:08:23,009 --> 00:08:24,019
US INTO LEG WRESTLING SO YOU
305
00:08:24,021 --> 00:08:26,011
COULD WATCH YOUR OWN SHOW?
306
00:08:26,013 --> 00:08:28,013
>> Pizza Steve: CAN'T HEAR YOU!
307
00:08:28,009 --> 00:08:29,009
>>
OH, YEAH, CRUSH THAT RED
308
00:08:29,015 --> 00:08:30,005
PEPPER, BABY.
309
00:08:30,007 --> 00:08:30,017
ALL OVER.
310
00:08:30,023 --> 00:08:31,023
ALL OVER!
311
00:08:32,000 --> 00:08:33,020
>> Mr. Gus: MAN, PIZZA STEVE
IS
312
00:08:33,018 --> 00:08:34,008
SMART.
313
00:08:34,008 --> 00:08:35,018
>> Uncle Grandpa: THAT'S WHAT
314
00:08:36,000 --> 00:08:38,000
I'VE BEEN TRYING TO TELL YOU!
315
00:08:41,009 --> 00:08:43,009
THAT WAS WEIRD.
316
00:08:49,013 --> 00:08:52,003
>> ♪ EVIL WIZARD ♪
317
00:08:52,004 --> 00:08:54,024
♪ EVIL WIZARD ♪
318
00:08:54,023 --> 00:08:58,003
♪ EVIL WIZARD ♪
319
00:08:58,003 --> 00:09:00,023
♪ EVIL WIZARD ♪
320
00:09:01,000 --> 00:09:07,010
♪ EVIL WIZARD ♪
321
00:09:12,008 --> 00:09:13,998
[ TOILET FLUSHES ]
322
00:09:14,006 --> 00:09:14,996
>> UGH.
323
00:09:15,002 --> 00:09:17,002
THAT WAS AN EVIL BREAKFAST.
324
00:09:17,004 --> 00:09:20,014
HMM, WHAT KIND OF EVIL CAN I DO
325
00:09:20,010 --> 00:09:21,010
TODAY?
326
00:09:21,012 --> 00:09:23,012
LET ME SEE.
327
00:09:23,015 --> 00:09:25,015
DEMOLISH A PET STORE?
328
00:09:25,020 --> 00:09:28,000
SET FIRE TO AN ORPHANAGE?
329
00:09:28,005 --> 00:09:30,005
DESTROY THE EARTH?
330
00:09:30,016 --> 00:09:31,996
MESS WITH EDDIE?
331
00:09:32,006 --> 00:09:33,006
AW, YEAH, SON!
332
00:09:33,016 --> 00:09:34,016
NOW THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKIN'
333
00:09:34,022 --> 00:09:36,022
ABOUT!
334
00:09:36,018 --> 00:09:38,018
TIME TO DISPENSE A HEALTHY LOAD
335
00:09:38,018 --> 00:09:44,008
OF EVIL!
336
00:09:44,010 --> 00:09:44,020
>> HUH?
337
00:09:44,023 --> 00:09:46,003
>> BEHOLD!
338
00:09:46,005 --> 00:09:48,015
I AM EVIL WIZARD!
339
00:09:48,019 --> 00:09:49,009
AAH!
340
00:09:49,011 --> 00:09:50,021
>> HYUP HYUP HYUP HYUP HYUP.
341
00:09:50,023 --> 00:09:52,003
>> [ GROANS ]
342
00:09:52,005 --> 00:09:53,995
MY FOOT!
343
00:09:54,005 --> 00:09:54,995
OH, IT HURTS SO MUCH!
344
00:09:55,006 --> 00:09:56,006
>> YOU WANT ME TO CALL AN
345
00:09:56,010 --> 00:09:57,020
AMBULANCE OR SOMETHING?
346
00:09:57,017 --> 00:09:59,007
>> HOW CAN YOU POSSIBLY CALL AN
347
00:09:59,010 --> 00:10:01,010
AMBULANCE, EDDIE, AFTER I'VE
348
00:10:01,015 --> 00:10:03,015
MADE YOUR LIFE A LIVING
349
00:10:03,021 --> 00:10:05,001
NIGHTMARE?!
350
00:10:05,005 --> 00:10:08,005
[ LAUGHS ]
351
00:10:08,013 --> 00:10:10,013
>> I WOULDN'T EXACTLY CALL
THIS
352
00:10:10,015 --> 00:10:12,995
A LIVING NIGHTMARE.
353
00:10:13,005 --> 00:10:15,005
WHOA! A $20 BILL!
354
00:10:15,014 --> 00:10:16,014
>> HUH? WHAT?
355
00:10:16,015 --> 00:10:17,995
WELL, WHATEVER.
356
00:10:18,003 --> 00:10:19,003
20 BUCKS AIN'T MUCH.
357
00:10:19,003 --> 00:10:20,023
I MAKE THAT IN LIKE AN HOUR.
358
00:10:20,020 --> 00:10:22,010
>> WAIT A SECOND.
359
00:10:22,011 --> 00:10:24,011
IT'S ACTUALLY STUCK...TO A $100
360
00:10:24,012 --> 00:10:25,022
BILL!
361
00:10:25,022 --> 00:10:26,022
WOW!
362
00:10:26,022 --> 00:10:28,012
120 BUCKS!
363
00:10:28,012 --> 00:10:29,022
IF IT WEREN'T FOR YOU, I WOULD
364
00:10:30,000 --> 00:10:31,020
HAVE WALKED PAST ALL THIS CASH.
365
00:10:31,017 --> 00:10:32,017
THANKS, EVIL WIZARD.
366
00:10:32,021 --> 00:10:34,011
AND IF YOU ASK ME, THEY SHOULD
367
00:10:34,012 --> 00:10:36,012
CALL YOU LUCKY WIZARD.
368
00:10:36,016 --> 00:10:37,996
HOT DOG!
369
00:10:38,004 --> 00:10:40,004
>> YEAH, WELL, NO ONE ASKED YOU!
370
00:10:40,004 --> 00:10:42,004
AND GOOD LUCK FIGURING OUT WHY
371
00:10:42,004 --> 00:10:43,024
THEY WERE STUCK TOGETHER!
372
00:10:43,019 --> 00:10:44,999
OH, WELL. I TRIED.
373
00:10:45,006 --> 00:10:45,013
HMM.
374
00:10:45,015 --> 00:10:46,015
SINCE I'M IN THE CITY, I MIGHT
375
00:10:46,020 --> 00:10:48,020
AS WELL FIND SOMETHING TO DO.
376
00:10:48,023 --> 00:10:50,013
OH, WAIT!
377
00:10:50,008 --> 00:10:51,008
IF I HURRY, I STILL MIGHT BE
378
00:10:51,016 --> 00:10:53,006
ABLE TO CATCH $2 TACO TUESDAYS
379
00:10:53,010 --> 00:10:54,010
AT TACO STORE.
380
00:10:54,013 --> 00:11:00,013
[ LAUGHS EVILLY ]
381
00:11:00,015 --> 00:11:01,015
[ SLURPING ]
382
00:11:01,019 --> 00:11:02,019
AHH.
383
00:11:02,019 --> 00:11:04,019
OH, TACO STORE, YOU'RE THE
384
00:11:04,023 --> 00:11:07,003
EVILEST.
23752
