Original subtitles

[ UP-TEMPO MUSIC PLAYS ]

>> Uncle Grandpa: GOOD MORNING!

GOOD MORNING.

GOOD MORNING.

>> GRFT: [ ROARS ]

>> Uncle Grandpa: GOOD MORNING.

GOOD MORNING!

>> [ LAUGHS EVILLY ]

YOU, THERE -- GIVE ME YOUR

SPACE ORC GOLD.

>> WHY SHOULD I?

>> BECAUSE YOUARE A MINION, AND

IAM THE SPACE EMPEROR.

THAT IS WHY.

WHAT ABOUT YOU, STINKY MINION?

HAND OVER YOUR LASER-FUEL

RESERVES, PRONTO!

>> HOW COME WE ALWAYS HAVE TO

PLAY THE MINIONS AND YOU ALWAYS

GET TO PLAY THE SPACE EMPEROR?

>> BECAUSE I'M THE SPACE

EMPEROR, AND I GET TO DECIDE WHO

DOES WHAT.

NOW, WHICH ONE OF YOU MINIONS IS

GOING TO MAKE ME A DINNER

SANDWICH?

>> YOU'RE BEING TOO BOSSY, AND

THIS ISN'T FUN ANYMORE.

YOU CAN PLAY SPACE FRONTIERS ALL

BY YOURSELF.

COME ON, NATHAN. LET'S GO HOME.

[ CRASH! ]

>> Both: WHOA!

[ CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS ]

>> Uncle Grandpa: GOOD MORNING!

THAT'S RIGHT -- EVERYONE IN THE

WORLD'S UNCLE AND GRANDPA IS

HERE.

[ SQUEAK! ]

>> INTRUDER!

I AM THE SPACE EMPEROR OF THE

VORTRON DIMENSION, AND YOU ARE

AN INTRUDER!

>> Uncle Grandpa: OH, NO!

A SINISTER SPACE EMPEROR!

HE MUST HAVE GOTTEN STRANDED

HERE ON OUR PLANET SOMEHOW.

I BETTER SEND HIM BACK TO HIS

DIMENSION, ASAP!

BELLY BAG, CAN YOU PLEASE FETCH

MY TELEPORTATION LASER?

>> Belly Bag: SURE THING,

UNCLE GRANDPA.

>> Uncle Grandpa: THANKS,

BELLY BAG.

>> HOW LONG MUST THE EMPEROR

WAIT FOR HIS DINNER SANDWICH?

[ WHOOSH! ]

[ CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS ]

>> Uncle Grandpa: EASY-PEASY,

CANTONEZEY.

>> MELVIN!

IT'S TIME FOR YOUR DINNER

SANDWICH!

OH, HI, UNCLE GRANDPA.

I'M BABYSITTING THIS KID, AND HE

SEEMS TO HAVE VANISHED.

>> Uncle Grandpa: OH, YEAH?

WHAT DID HE LOOK LIKE?

>> OH, HE'S ABOUT THIS TALL,

BLOND HAIR, AND WEARING A TOWEL

FOR A CAPE.

MELVIN WAS JUST OUT HERE, AND

NOW HE'S GONE.

I FEEL LIKE THE WORLD'S WORST

BABYSITTER EVER IN THE WORLD.

I'VE NEVER LOST A KID BEFORE.

>> Uncle Grandpa: HMM.

COME TO THINK OF IT, NEITHER

HAVE I.

I PROMISE YOU THIS, BABYSITTER

LADY -- AS GOD AS MY WITNESS,

I'M GONNA FIND MELVIN AND BRING

HIM BACK, EVEN IF I HAVE TO

TRAVEL THROUGH EVERY SINGLE

DIMENSION TILL I LOCATE THE

SPECIFIC ONE THAT HE'S LOST IN.

[ WHOOSH! ]

PBHT!

>> WAIT, WHAT?

DIMENSIONS?

I THOUGHT YOU SAID YOU DIDN'T

SEE HIM.

>> Uncle Grandpa: UH, CAN'T HEAR

YOU.

GOING THROUGH A PORTAL.

UH, SORRY.

[ SQUISH! ]

[ WHOOSH! ]

[ SQUISH! ]

[ POP! ]

>> Uncle Grandpa: ALL RIGHT.

NOW TO FIND MELVIN AND BRING HIM

HOME!

>> INTRUDER!

YOU ARE UNDER ARREST, FILTHY

INTRUDER.

>> Uncle Grandpa: OH, BOY.

WHAT LUCK.

I'M SO GLAD I BUMPED INTO NATIVE

TOWNFOLK.

>> BE QUIET.

>> LET'S TAKE HIM TO THE MUDDY

PRISON DUNGEON, INTRODUCE HIM TO

GORNAK.

[ SPLASH! ]

>> Uncle Grandpa: MELVIN!

>> [ GRUNTS ]

>> Uncle Grandpa: MELVIN!

MAN, I REALLY GOT TO FIND THAT

KID.

>> [ GROWLS ]

[ PANTING ]

>> Uncle Grandpa: GOOD MORNING.

>> [ ROARS ]

[ GROWLS ]

[ CRACK! ]

[ GROWLS ]

>> Uncle Grandpa: YOU MUST BE

GORNAK.

>> [ GRUNTS, GROWLS ]

>> Uncle Grandpa: LISTEN,

GORNAK -- IT'S VERY NICE TO MEET

YOU, BUT I'M AFRAID I CAN'T PLAY

WITH YOU RIGHT NOW.

SO, IF YOU'LL KINDLY EXCUSE ME,

I MUST BE ON MY WAY.

[ WHIRRING ]

[ GRUNTS ]

[ SPLAT! POP! ]

ARE YOU OKAY, UNCLE GRANDPA?

WELL, I THINK GORNAK MUST HAVE

MISUNDERSTOOD ME WHEN I TOLD HIM

I CAN'T PLAY WITH HIM RIGHT NOW.

MIND IF I TRY TALKING TO HIM?

BY ALL MEANS, UNCLE GRANDPA.

[ CREAK! ]

[ SLUMP! SNAP! ]

[ GROANS, GRUNTS ]

>> [ GROWLS ]

[ GRUNTING ]

>> Uncle Grandpa: GORNAK, I

DON'T MEAN TO BE RUDE, BUT,

HONESTLY, I DON'T HAVE TIME TO

PLAY RIGHT NOW.

THERE'S A BOY OUT THERE WHOSE

NAME IS MELVIN, AND HE NEEDS ME

TO FIND HIM.

>> [ GRUNTS ]

>> Uncle Grandpa: YOU SEE, I'VE

NEVER LOST A KID BEFORE, AND I'M

NOT GONNA LOSE ONE NOW.

SO I MUST BID YOU FAIRLY WELL.

>> Belly Bag: UM, UNCLE GRANDPA,

COULD YOU STOP GETTING PUNCHED

IN THE BELLY BAG?

>> Uncle Grandpa: WHY,

CERTAINLY, MY TRUSTY POUCH

FRIEND.

>> [ GRUNTS ]

[ POP! ]

>> [ GROWLS ]

>> Uncle Grandpa: HEY, GORNY.

I'M NOT SURE IF YOU'RE AWARE,

BUT YOU GOT A LOT OF CROWDING

BACK THERE.

HAVE YOU CONSIDERED GETTING

BRACES?

>> [ GRUNTS ]

[ THWIP! ]

>> Uncle Grandpa: ALL RIGHT,

GORNAK, I DIDN'T WANT IT TO COME

TO THIS, BUT YOU LEAVE ME NO

CHOICE.

YOU JUST EARNED YOURSELF ONE

ORDER OF UNCLE GRANDPA'S SPANK

BOTTOM SPECIAL.

>> [ CRYING ]

>> THIS WARRIOR IS MOST

IMPRESSIVE.

>> Uncle Grandpa: [ GRUNTS ]

GOOD MORNING, MINIONS.

>> HE MUST BE SHOWN TO THE

EMPEROR.

>> Uncle Grandpa: THE EMPEROR?

PERFECT.

I COULD ASK HIM WHERE MELVIN IS.

THANK YOU.

NOW, DON'T GO SPENDING THAT ALL

IN ONE DIMENSION.

[ BONK! ]

>> [ CHOMP! ]

EMPEROR ZORTH, I PRESENT TO YOU

THE INTERSTELLAR WARRIOR WHO

BESTED GORNAK.

>> Uncle Grandpa: HEY, THERE,

EMPEROR ZORTH.

>> YOU!

>> Uncle Grandpa: OH, THERE YOU

ARE.

COME ON, MELVIN.

LET'S GET YOU HOME.

>> THE NAME ISN'T "MELVIN."

IT'S "EMPEROR ZORTH"!

AND I'M NOT GOING ANYWHERE.

BACK ON EARTH, NO ONE LISTENED

TO ME, BUT HERE...

WATCH THIS.

[ WHISTLES ]

GO MAKE ME A DINNER SANDWICH.

>> Uncle Grandpa: WHY ARE YOU

FOLLOWING HIS ORDERS?

>> BECAUSE HE'S THE EMPEROR.

[ CREAK! ]

>> Uncle Grandpa: OH, NO.

AFTER I ACCIDENTALLY SENT HIM

HERE, MELVIN DOESN'T WANT TO GO

HOME.

WHAT AM I GONNA DO?

IT'S LIKE HE'S TAKEN DRESSING

UP LIKE AN EMPEROR TOO FAR.

HEY, THAT GIVES ME AN...

IDEA!

I'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

[ DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS ]

>> UNCLE GRANDPA, WHAT

ARE YOU DOING?

I COMMAND YOU TO TAKE THAT

RIDICULOUS COSTUME OFF.

>> Uncle Grandpa: I'M NOT

UNCLE GRAN--

[ COUGHS, CLEARS THROAT ]

>> Emperor Krell: [ Aristocratic

voice ] I AM NOT UNCLE GRANDPA.

I'M EMPEROR KRELL!

I GO ON A LOVELY COSMIC CRUISE

OF THE NETHERVERSE FOR TWO

WEEKS, ONLY TO COME HOME TO FIND

MY THRONE'S BEEN TAKEN OVER BY A

KID!

WHY ARE YOU JUST FOLLOWING HIS

ORDERS?

>> HI, AGAIN, UNCLE GRANDPA.

>> Uncle Grandpa: I AM NOT

UNCLE GRANDPA!

>> AND I AM NOT JUST SOME KID

SITTING ON A THRONE!

I AM EMPEROR ZORTH!

[ CHOMP! ]

NO MAYO! MAKE IT AGAIN!

>> Emperor Krell: BELAY THAT

ORDER, MINION.

THERE IS ONLY ONE EMPEROR, AND

THAT IS ME.

NOW GET OFF MY THRONE, KID!

>> IT'S MY THRONE, AND THE

MINION DOES MY BIDDING!

BECAUSE I'MTHE EMPEROR!

>> Emperor Krell: I'MTHE

EMPEROR!

>> I'MTHE EMPEROR!

>> Emperor Krell: I'MTHE

EMPEROR!

>> I'MTHE EMPEROR!

[ BOOM! ]

[ THUD! ]

>> I'M OKAY.

>> Emperor Krell: MAKE ME A

DINNER SANDWICH.

>> YOU THINK YOU CAN

JUST MAKE ME MAKE YOU A --

[ RUSTLING ]

WHAT?

WHAT'S GOING ON?

WHY AM I DOING THIS?

>> Emperor Krell: BECAUSE I'M

THE EMPEROR.

AND NOW SHOOT FIRE OUT OF YOUR

MOUTH.

>> THAT'S INSANE.

I'M NOT GOING TO -- AAH!

AAH!

STOP MAKING ME DO THIS!

THAT'S AN ORDER!

AAH!

[ Voice breaking ] PLEASE?

>> Emperor Krell: NEVER!

AND NOW I ORDER YOU TO BECOME MY

DINNER-SANDWICH-MAKING,

FIRE-BREATHING PET POGNOG...

FOREVER!

>> POGNOG?

WHAT'S A POGNOG?

[ BUBBLE! BUBBLE! BUBBLE! ]

NO, NOT THE MAYONNAISE!

[ SOBBING ]

>> Emperor Krell: WHO'S THE

EMPEROR NOW, KID?

[ LAUGHS EVILLY ]

>> YOU'RE THE EMPEROR!

YOU ARE!

YOU'RE THE EMPEROR,

UNCLE GRANDPA!

[ Crying ] I'M SO SORRY.

I JUST GET CARRIED AWAY WHEN I

PUT ON THAT STUPID COSTUME.

[ SOBS ]

I LEARNED HOW ANNOYING IT IS TO

BE BOSSED AROUND, AND I'LL NEVER

DO IT AGAIN.

I HATE BEING SPACE EMPEROR.

I JUST WANT TO GO HOME!

>> Uncle Grandpa: THAT'S JUST

WHAT I WANTED TO HEAR.

>> WHAT?

>> Uncle Grandpa: HUH? OH.

I WAS JUST SAYING, "THAT'S JUST

WHAT I WANTED TO HEAR."

>> BUT -- WHAT?

>> Emperor Krell: WHO IS THAT

HANDSOME DEVIL?

OH, NEVER MIND.

PREPARE TO DIE!

>> Uncle Grandpa: NOT THIS

MORNING!

[ WHOOSH! ]

>> Emperor Krell: HA!

YOU MISSED ME!

[ WHOOSH! ]

AAH!

>> Uncle Grandpa: I TOTALLY

MEANT TO DO THAT.

[ BUTTON CLICKS ]

[ CRANK! ]

[ WHOOSH! ]

>> Uncle Grandpa: I NEVER LOST A

KID YET.

READY TO GO HOME, MELVIN?

>> SO, DID YOU KNOW THERE WAS AN

EVIL EMPEROR DUDE WHO LOOKED

EXACTLY LIKE YOU, OR WAS THAT

JUST A COINCIDENCE?

>> Uncle Grandpa: UH, CAN'T HEAR

YOU.

GOING THROUGH A PORTAL.

[ ZIP! ]

[ ZIP! SQUISH! ]

[ ZIP! ZIP! ]

>> MELVIN!

THANK YOU, UNCLE GRANDPA.

COME ON INSIDE, MELVIN.

I'LL MAKE YOU A DINNER SANDWICH.

>> HOW ABOUT IMAKEYOU

A DINNER SANDWICH?

>> OKAY.

THANKS, MELVIN.

>> DON'T THANK ME.

THANK -- UNCLE GRANDPA?

[ GUST! ]

>> Uncle Grandpa: ♪ GOOD...

MOR...

NING ♪

>> Belly Bag: IT'S TIME FOR

"TIGER TALK," WITH YOUR HOST,

GIANT REALISTIC FLYING TIGER!

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

>> GRFT: [ GROWLS ]

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

[ ROARS ]

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE STOP ]

[ GROWLS ]

[ ROARS ]

>> Mr. Gus: THAT'S A GOOD

QUESTION, TIGER.

I'D SAY ABOUT THREE OR FOUR

TIMES A WEEK.

>> Audience: OOH!

>> GRFT: [ ROARS ]

>> Mr. Gus: NO.

>> Audience: AW!

>> GRFT: [ GROWLS, ROARS ]

>> Mr. Gus: MY FAVORITE FOOD IS

TOAST.

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

>> Belly Bag: THAT'S ALL THE

TIME WE HAVE FOR "TIGER TALK"

TODAY.

TUNE IN TOMORROW WHEN

PIZZA STEVE MODELS THE HOTTEST

FALL TOPPINGS.

[ CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKING ]

>> GRFT: [ GROWLS ]

>> Uncle Grandpa: [ SNAP! ]

[ SQUEAK! SQUEAK! SQUEAK! ]

[ SQUEAK! SQUEAK! SQUEAK! ]

AAH-AAH-AAH--

CHOO!