Original subtitles

We'll climb back into the low seventies Saturday and Sunday

and then cold front number two rolls in Sunday night...

Can you believe that's who they replaced me with?

I mean, look at what she's wearing! You're not at a nightclub, lady!

-She kinda looks like you. -No, she doesn't.

We've got scattered storms across the state from Houston all the way to Dallas.

If you're pointing at Dallas, it's two inches lower, ya dummy!

-Whatcha watching? -New weather girl.

Nope.

Thanks for watching. I'm Kelli with an "I," and that eye is on your weather.

God!

I bet everyone's gonna love her and no one's even gonna care that I'm gone.

Oh, that ain't true.

And besides, you'll find another job.

It's not that easy, Georgie.

I don't know. Just last week Kelli with an "I" didn't have a job and now look at her.

Mister McAllister, wait up!

You two planning anything fun tonight?

Movie, board game,

maybe a shower?

I showered... recently.

She's fine. She don't stink.

-Thank you. -But your legs are gettin' a little bushy.

Here's an interesting thing,

women started shaving their legs during World War Two

'cause their nylon stockings were being used to make parachutes.

How is that helpful?

I didn't say "helpful." I said "interesting."

I take it the job hunt is not going well?

I sent my tape to every station between here and Houston. No one is biting.

It's only been a few weeks. You just gotta be patient.

I don't need to be cheered up, I don't need to be pitied,

and I don't need to be reminded of how hairy my legs are!

So, I understand someone has a big birthday coming up.

Oh, that's right, twenty-one.

Our boy's becoming a man.

Planning anything fun, Amanda?

Oh, right.

It's okay. I don't need a fuss.

Naw, you gotta do something. Mandy, what'd you do for your twenty-first?

-I don't remember. -It was more than a decade ago.

I'm serious. You ain't gotta do nothin'.

No, it... it's a big birthday. Whatever you want.

-I'm tellin' ya, it's not-- -Pick something!

How 'bout shave your legs?

Or wear nylons. They're available again.

Oh, come on! I can't do it. They'll recognize my voice.

I ain't calling the station to complain about the new weather girl.

No, you don't have to complain. Just say that you miss me.

'Cause I'm less of a whore.

-Sorry, not doin' it. -God, thanks for nothing.

Hey, I paid for six years of college and don't charge you rent.

Yeah. Nothin' else!

-Hello? -Hi, Mandy. How are you?

That's a rabbit hole you don't wanna go down.

Understood.

I just wanted to check in and see what you're thinkin' for Georgie's birthday.

He said he doesn't want to do anything.

Really? Is it a surprise party?

Is he in the room? If he is just say, "What did Missy do now?"

No, there's no party. We're just gonna have a quiet evening at home.

Well, if there's no party, I'd be happy to cook him a birthday dinner.

Oh, that sounds nice.

And he can have alcohol if he wants, but no hard stuff.

I'm not operatin' a speakeasy.

Got it. I'll leave my moonshine in the car.

Very funny.

Wasn't a joke. Bye.

Relax! I don't drink moonshine.

Hey, it's Missy.

Hey, what's up?

How 'bout I throw Georgie a birthday party?

My friend Jennifer's parents are gone next week. We have the place to ourselves.

You wanna throw Georgie a party at your friend's house?

Yeah. I just need money for a couple of kegs.

I am not buying you alcohol!

I'm providing the venue.

How about this? When you turn twenty-one, I'll throw you a big party.

Like I want a forty-year-old planning my birthday party.

I will be thirty-seven!

I'm gonna cut out a little early on Wednesday.

My mom's cookin' me a birthday dinner.

I didn't know it was your birthday.

Well, it's okay. You ain't gotta get me nothin'.

"Ain 't gotta get me nothin'." How 'bout English lessons?

-It's your twenty-first, right? -Yeah.

And you're celebrating it at your mother's?

Yeah.

Please tell me you're gonna get drunk after.

No, but my mom said I could have a beer with dinner.

Georgie, going to a bar on your twenty- first birthday is a rite of passage.

Mandy's having a rough time. I don't wanna make her celebrate.

Fine. Then I'm taking you out.

Thanks! Awful dang kind of ya.

"Awful dang." You do hear how other people talk, right?

What should we have for lunch?

How 'bout ice cream? I want ice cream.

Let's have ice cream.

Hey! I had a thought about Georgie's birthday gift I wanted to run by you.

Oh, crap!

-It's in two days. -I know, I know.

What are you gonna get him?

I was thinking a silver money clip, maybe shaped like Texas.

I don't know. He's pretty attached to that stupid Velcro wallet.

All right, I'll keep thinking. And you better be thinking too.

He only turns twenty-one once.

It should've been before you had a baby, but here we are.

Thanks for pointing that out.

Honey, I know you're having a tough time, but if the situation were reversed,

you know Georgie would suck it up and make a fuss.

I'll make a fuss. Fine. Leave me alone.

Is CeeCee having ice cream for lunch?

God! I'm a bad mother, I'm a bad wife, anything else?

You're kind of a crappy daughter, too.

-Seven hundred. -L.

There are three Ls. Yep. Raking up there, close to five thousand dollars.

-What are you doing? -Your legs aren't that hairy.

Thank you.

What's going on with the pits?

-Hey. -Hey, how was your job?

Fine. So listen, I was talking to Ruben about my birthday

and he really wants to take me out for drinks.

What about your mom's?

Well, we'll have dinner and then I'll meet him afterwards.

You don't have to come, it can just be a guys' night.

-I'm free. -Great! The more, the merrier.

Wh-- Hang on! I-- I thought you didn't wanna do anything special?

Well, I know, but Ruben's really into it.

Well, then I should come too.

Sorry, dudes only.

Well, she can come if she wants, but you don't have to.

No, I want to. Because I am a good wife and a good mother and a good daughter.

Okay.

-I'd like to solve it. -Okay. Solve it.

"Double your pleasure...

You're kind of a so-so sister.

Happy birthday, dear Georgie Happy birthday to you

Make a wish.

-Yay! -Yay!

-Champagne for me and the birthday boy. -Thank you.

How about me?

You make enough bad choices without alcohol.

A toast to my firstborn. I am so proud of you.

I wish your dad could be here to see all you've accomplished.

A father, a husband, a business owner, only twenty-one.

Cheers.

Sorry, I thought you were done. Let me refill.

Anyway, I am so excited to see what the future holds. Happy birthday.

Cheers.

Thank you, Mom. Thanks, everybody.

Well, I always knew whatever you set your mind to, you would achieve.

Well, that's what my parents used to say about me.

You'll find another job.

And if not, you've got a great husband to provide for you.

-How 'bout presents? -Me first.

-Dang! -What is it?

A Texas-shaped money clip.

And it's solid silver.

Thank you. This is perfect.

Yeah, it just came to me.

I've been sittin' on this wallet since seventh grade.

It's gonna be hard to give it up.

Your turn, Mom.

Well, this is a little awkward now, but here.

A new Velcro wallet! Cool!

The birthday boy is here!

Hey!

Let me pour you a beer.

Forget beer.

Waitress, four shots of tequila.

-Really? -Yeah! Come on, it's a party.

Okay.

I'm gonna put some songs on the jukebox.

See if they got any Aerosmith.

It is your birthday, but, no.

Here, you go.

To the birthday boy.

-Ain't we gonna wait for Connor? -Nope.

Uh-oh.

Good morning.

Oh, look what the cat spit up.

What happened?

Well, I puked a pepperoni pizza I don't remember eating, so that's one thing.

When you and Georgie came home, we heard a lot of shouting.

-Really? -He sounded pretty mad.

-Did you hear what it was about? -You don't know?

Look at me. Do I look like I know anything?

-Well, did you see him this morning? -No, he left before I got up.

Well, maybe we made up.

He slept on the couch.

Maybe we didn't.

Got the toilet unclogged. Someone tried to flush this money clip.

What? He tried to flush my birthday present?

You stole my idea?!

I gotta talk to him.

Don't you think you should find out some more information first?

Who's right, who's wrong?

These are important things to know if you are gonna win this fight.

-Why does she have to win? -Jim, not now.

You're alive. Impressive.

Need you to connect some dots for me.

Which dots?

The ones between tequila shots and ten minutes ago.

-That's a lot of dots. -It was a lot of shots.

What's the last thing you remember?

You went over to the jukebox.

That jukebox. A wasteland of classic rock.

The Eagles, what an overrated band.

-Hey, hey! Focus! -Right.

Wasteland of classic rock. Eagles, what an overrated band.

I'm just sayin' we've got all night, pace yourself.

-What? I don't have a job. I don't have to get up tomorrow.

-What'd you choose? -To walk away.

-Do whatever you want. -Aw, I'm glad I have your permission.

Pool table's open. Who wants to play?

-I do. -Cool!

Mandy, let's go play.

I'm glad somebody wants to have fun.

On behalf of my family, I apologize.

She's just blowin' off steam.

Aw, crap!

What?

-I'm the jerk! -Hold on.

She's been havin' a rough go of it.

I really just hope this cheers her up.

-Wha-- That makes it worse! -It sure does.

-McAllister Auto. -Ruben, good. It's Mandy.

Georgie's not here. He's on a tow.

Is he mad at me?

I'm mad at you. You stabbed me with a pool cue.

Please, I would never do that.

I have a bruise on my left nipple!

Well, what about Georgie?

I don't know. He didn't seem happy when you were on the payphone.

Payphone? Who would I have called?

I have no idea. Although, I would recommend Alcoholics Anonymous.

Well, do you remember anything?

We were playing pool. Well, I was playing pool.

Come on, you wuss, fight me!

Mandy, please, somebody's gonna get hurt.

Nobody's gonna get hurt. Boop!

-Ow! -Ow.

Your shots.

-Hey! One of those was mine. -And it was delicious.

Why are you being such a dick?

-No, I'm not! -Mandy.

Fine.

I stood up for what I believed in and I lost my job.

And I was really good at that job.

-You were. -Aw, thanks!

You're good at your job, too. Probably, I don't really know.

God, I worked so hard to get my career back

and people were starting to recognize me

and I was this close to being a woman on the streets...

Wha-- What did I say?

I don't know. You were mad, you were sad.

There was a hot girl at the bar. What do you want from me?

Well, then what happened?

I bought her a drink. Her name's Rebecca. She's a masseuse.

What happened to me?

Then I saw you on the payphone and Georgie bein' all mad.

I think I know who I called.

Good for you. I'm gonna go ice my nipple.

-Hello? -Hey, Scott. It's Mandy.

It's nice to hear from you during the day.

So I did call you last night.

You sure did.

-Did I wake you up? -You sure did.

Did I say anything embarrassing?

You sure did.

Please, please give me my job back.

I would get down on my knees,

but the floor here is sticky and I'm wearing a skirt and--

-Who are you talkin' to? -Just gimme a sec. This is important.

Come on, we've known each other for a long time. I--

Is that Scott?

It's a work call.

You're drunk dialing your ex-boyfriend.

No, I'm drunk dialing my ex-boss.

-Hang up the phone. -You hang up the phone.

Fine!

Yeah, I was a little drunk.

It's okay.

I hope Georgie knows there was nothing inappropriate,

except for you calling me at home and waking me up

and telling me what you were wearing.

I'm sorry.

So, um... I'm a little fuzzy on the details.

Did I get my job back?

-You did not. -Yeah.

-Hey. -Hi.

Look, I wanted to apologize.

Kinda busy.

Look, I know last night got out of hand, and I'm really sorry that I called Scott,

but I promise, it was just to get my job back.

You told me that last night.

So, I already apologized?

Yeah.

Then why are you still mad at me?

I'm not mad about the phone call. I'm mad about what happened on the drive home.

-Did I puke in your truck? -In it, on it, around it.

I'm sorry.

-Are you sorry for anything else? -I am.

Can you give me a hint?

Okay, I'm good. We can go.

Can't wait to get this night over with.

I was just trying to celebrate your birthday.

Tonight wasn't about my birthday. It was about you.

Well, sorry. Not all of us have our lives figured out at twenty-one.

So, now you're mad at my age?

Yes! It's a constant reminder of what a failure I am.

False alarm. Where were we?

So, you blew up your career. Start over.

This was the start over! I am thirty-two. I don't get more start overs.

Age don't matter!

That is a dumb thing only a twenty-one-year-old would say.

So, now I'm young and dumb?

Yes, and that makes me old and-

Oh, God.

-All over you? -Like a vomit fire hose.

God, I'm really sorry.

Oh, forget it.

It's just everything seems to come so easy to you.

It ain't easy. I work my ass off.

Yeah, and you deserve all your success.

Well, you do too.

And so what you didn't have it at twenty-one.

If you had it, we would've never met and there'd be no CeeCee.

You're right.

Oh, here's your money clip.

Next time you're mad at me, don't flush it down the toilet.

I didn't flush it down the toilet.

So, it was me?

Boy, I do not come off good in any of these stories.

Earlier that morning...

Bye bye.