All language subtitles for The.Real.L.Word.Los.Angeles.S02E02.720p.HDTV.ORENJI.en

Previously,
on The Real L Word...

- Hollywood!
- Hear, hear! Hollywood!

I feel like if I don't
go out to L.A.

And figure out why
I'm holding on to Francine,

I'll never be able to give
Vivian, like,

all of myself.

I'm gonna go.

You're in love with a girl.
Why are you here?

I don't know what's
wrong with me

that I can't get over her.

Francine, I'm tired
of wondering about you.

Okay? I'm tired of it.

"Achieving motherhood

is not straightforward
for lesbians."

No shit.

He was supposed to call
ten minutes ago.

We found a donor.

I don't want some
Joe shmoe that

beat off into a cup.

"Sorry, guys, I think
this is too much for me."

Fuck this.

At this point,
it's been three weeks

since we've had sex.

You gonna be okay to walk?

We were going to have sex.

And then did I just
fall asleep?

Pretty much.

Mom...

I just wanted to let you know
I met someone out here.

- Who?
- Her name is chanel.

- How are you?
- I'm good. How are you?

- Nice to see you.
- It's nice to meet you as well.

Chanel and I, we're almost like
instantly comfortable.

It meant so much more
than a dance.

And the dance was plenty
by itself.

There you go.

Yeah, just like that.

Cheers...To Rachel.

Welcome to Los Angeles.

Welcome to the west coast.

I heard the west coast
is the breast coast.

The west coast
may be the breast coast.

I would definitely say
it's inevitable

that me and Whitney
are going to hook up.

Welcome to my crib.

It's a possibility.

Let's talk about how much
you miss me.

You just get under my soul.

Sara can be shady.

Like, she can't trusted.

Some form of leprosy

slowly eating away at my limbs.

I like those limbs.

Sara keeps texting me.

Sara's like a drug to me.

It's like putting
a big ol' bag of heroin

in front of a heroin addict...

And telling them
they can't touch it.

Ohh! Ohh!

Ah huh!

♪ It was just the other night ♪

♪ I don't wanna
think about it ♪

♪ I don't wanna start a fight ♪

♪ I don't wanna
think about it ♪

♪ every time I take
a step left, right ♪

♪ yeah, I think I'm
gonna sleep real good tonight ♪

♪ just think about it ♪

♪ you'll find a way
to make me crazy ♪

♪ hazy ♪

♪ so hypnotized ♪

♪ think of the blue skies ♪

♪ new eyes ♪

♪ and I'll never roam again ♪

♪ I'm back in love again ♪

♪ found my way
back home again ♪

Sync by n17t01
www.addic7ed.com

Come here, my baby.

I wish I could do this all day.

Mmm.

It always feels good to be
intimate with Sara

and, you know, back in her bed.

You want a ride?

Love one.

I keep hearing all this shit
from my friends

about us being together.

But it's like, I don't care
what other people say.

- Hot.
- Yeah.

I feel like Romeo and Juliet.

It's like I'm sneaking
out of, like, one family

to go, like, yon window breaks
to the other.

Oh, but then I'll really die.

That sounds, actually,
accurate.

Like, you would get out alive

and I'd be--
end up dying.

You'd be like, "damn.

"I'm actually just sleeping.

Damn, bitch, don't take it
so seriously."

♪ She's a femme, femme, femme ♪

♪ a femme fatale ♪

♪ she'll only
break your heart ♪

What is this in here?

Where's the food?

Dog land.

This is different,
it's doglandia.

Aw, look at that.

Beautiful.

That's a beautiful doggy.

Let's go get it.

"Let's go get it."

I forgot this is a dog park,

which means dog poop.

I love you.
Oh, my God.

Sara, I'm still trying
to figure out

what the hell is going on with.

I know, can we pet it, please?

I've never seen one
that color before.

It's so beautiful.

I love the feeling
I get when I'm with her.

I have these huge moments
of, "you're the one."

- Oh, did it hurt?
Did you hurt--

- can you throw it again?
- It's so soft.

You know,
obviously she has been

unhealthy for me in the past.

But we have
a very intense attraction.

Even as destructive as it is,

she's like a vice, you know?

Come on, Sam!
Come on, Sammy!

Yay! Look at that.
Who's that?

I don't know,
but that's a cute dog.

He's like...

Is that whit?

Ugh, no fuckin' way.

- With Sara.
- With Sara.

Shay and I take all the dogs
to the dog park.

And there's Whitney with Sara.

This is my life, fml.
Oh, my God.

All I can think is like,

"really?
Really, Whitney?"

Gotta keep an eye on that.

Sara is just a bad seed,

and it's like Whitney
is brainwashed

by the golden pussy right now.

I just don't get it.

Do you mind if we
get out of here?

Like, I'm feeling like
I don't wanna be here.

The bitches are out,
and I don't mean the dogs.

Ah, gee.

♪ Oh, oh, oh, trouble ♪

♪ is callin' my name ♪

♪ makin' me crazy ♪

Oh, jeez.

I'm headed back to Francine's.

My parents were in town,

so I ended up spending the night
at their hotel with them

just to give Francine
some time to cool down.

First night I got here
was a disaster.

Frannie came in just ready
to roast me.

I think she's just scared,

and I think it's easier
for her to be mad at me,

'cause if she forgives me,

then she runs the risk
of being hurt again.

Three years have gone by
since we've broken up,

and I don't know
what it's gonna be like

seeing each other every day.

But in no way am I only
moving out to L.A. for Francine.

I mean, work
is my number-one priority.

And I'd like to kind of
create a magazine

for lesbians,
because in a lot of places,

they still think that we're
these birkenstock-wearing girls.

But I think that
the times have changed.

And we need a publication
that shows who we are now.

All right, all right.
Sounds good.

I'm gonna take a shower,
so why don't you just,

whenever you're
getting off work,

give me a call.

Frannie and I, our relationship
is pretty volatile.

We fight like a married couple.

It's like we bicker,
and then two minutes later,

we're like, "oh, so tomorrow
we'll go to the beach, yeah?"

And it's like, people
are just so, like,

"you just acted like
you hated each other,

and now you're fine."

Yes, you're good now.

Yes, your salad is good.

You're good now.
I'm proud of you.

Your behavior last night,
however, was not good.

Yeah. No.

Francine, you're good.

You are good now.
You are good now.

You are good now.

No buts.
No buts.

Okay. Thank you.

Okay, bye.

Bye.

Oh, my goodness.

♪ Let's work it out ♪

♪ let's work it out this time ♪

♪ don't wait
for the sun to shine ♪

Marissa just texted me
and said her flight landed.

I'm trying to make sure, like,
her visit here

isn't, like, completely gay.
You know?

Riss! What's up, mama?

I'm good.
How are you?

Marissa's one of my straight
friends from college.

She's coming to town
to see L.A. life

and L.A. lesbians.

I just came out a year ago.

So she's gonna be helping me
size 'em up.

I told you I was
stalking this girl.

You were stalking somebody?

It is like stalker
appreciation month or something.

No, it's not.

- Or stalker awareness month--
same shit.

There's no such thing
as stalker awareness month.

So I got to go
meet her last night.

Cool as hell. Then she went
to the club with us afterwards.

Even better.

I always ask
for a recommendation,

'cause I never know
what to get.

I'm just a little nervous,
because I don't want it

to be like I want it so bad

that I make it up in my head.

I've only met chanel once,
and I'm really into her.

I'm like a little horn dog
around her.

And I'm just hoping
she's feeling it too.

I'm saying lesbians
fall in love

in all of 30 minutes.
Really?

Because you don't have
that nigga that's being cool

and pacing himself,

and he got eight other
bitches on the side.

You know what I mean?
So I gotta pa--you know?

That doesn't exist.

I met her yesterday.
Okay, you're in lust already?

Yeah, it's like
crazy lust, though.

It's like, "I like you."
"I like you too."

"Okay, well,
then we wanna go for it?"

Let's just not put all our eggs

into this one basket.

Sometimes I get caught up
in girls that are nothing like

what I'm looking for
or what I need.

Marissa's always been glad
to put me back on that road.

I just keep thinking
about her eyelashes last night

were, like, so out and bold.

- Lord have mercy.
- It ain't even been 24 hours.

♪ She comin' hard ♪

♪ she comin', she comin' hard ♪

♪ she comin' hard, she comin' ♪

♪ she comin' hard, hard,
she comin' hard ♪

Can you think of anybody else
you'd wanna ask?

The person who we thought
was gonna be our donor

is out.

This is insane.

I mean, I guess
this whole situation

just kind of was
a punch in the stomach.

I have decided that I am, um...

Ill-informed or have
un--mis--underestimated

people's biological connection
to their--

I just--I just don't get it.
- I--because, like,

every day, they shoot it off
into a towel,

and it's no big deal.

Like, instead of shooting it off
into a towel, give it to me.

Ideally, it would be awesome

if I could make
my own baby with her.

Um...But I can't.

I can't do anything about it.

I just gotta go--

you know, go with the process.

And, like, that's the thing
I hate about it,

is that we have no control.

And we're, like, stuck.

You ovulate in a month.

They're like--uh...

I'm ready, you know?

Like, I'm ready now.
I'm excited now.

We need to find a donor.

And I still really want
to find someone that we know.

Like, our future...
- Right. Well, look on--

- is hanging in his--
- His hands.

In his balls.

Our future is in his balls.

I mean, we have
a couple options.

The--the asking--
asking somebody

to give up your sperm
to make a baby,

uh, is a little daunt--
like, how do you--

would you like some wine?
Also, can we have your sperm?

I think we just start
asking people on the street.

I think we should put out
a craigslist ad.

"We need your junk."

It could work.
It could totally fuckin' work.

Have I lost you?
Are you divorcing me?

It was hot.

- Oh, you know what I want?
- Mm-mm.

- Spicy tuna crunch roll.
- There you go.

Romi, tell me
what salads they have,

'cause I don't have my glasses.

Um, they have seaweed,
cucumber...

Let me see.

My relationship with my mom

is a big part of my life.

My mom and my dad divorced
when I was six.

And then a few years later,

my mom married a woman.

So she understands the stuff
that we go through together.

So how are you?
How's work?

I'm the cashier, so you have
to be, like, exactly on point.

- Right.
- So one time,

I was like 75 cents over,
25 cents under,

35 cents, you know,
just under a dollar, but--

- they wrote her up.

- They wrote you up for it?
- And it's her first month.

- But she's dyslexic,
so that's something that--

- but then that's not
a good position for you.

Well, it's the only job I have.

Right, so I'm just saying,

heads-up to both of us,
which scared me,

kelsey might lose her job soon.

And that scares you because...

It scares me

because I'm gonna have
no help at all.

Lately, kelsey has been
a little bit of a challenge.

She's 23, you know.

She's never had to pay rent

and pay for her bills.

And I know she feels bad

because she doesn't want
to lose the job either.

So I think that half
the things I'm throwing at her,

it's--it's--

she doesn't even know
what the fuck I'm talking about.

I can't take care of me
and kelsey on everything.

I want to be able to provide.

I want all those things too,
and then--

- then you gotta
do something about it.

Oh, my God.

I know that!

I mean, shit, all I ask for
is bus money.

- Babe, I pay for drinks,
food, roof--

- but I don't want the drinks.
- I mean, everything.

She asked for the large one.

At least start looking
for a second job.

Okay, I'm the one cleaning...

And cooking.

She does do this.

If I could pay her to do that,

that would be a job,

which is kind of
what it is now.

I'd pay kelsey
to clean the house and--

- it's unspoken.

Make food for me
and rub my head at night.

- That's about
the extent of the intimacy--

she rubs your head?

These days, yes.

- Stop!
- Ohh, guys.

Kelsey needs more sex.
She needs more emotional.

She needs me
being affectionate.

- That's normal, honey.
- I'm 23. I need sex.

- That's normal.
- I need sex too.

She used to be so passionate
and romantic

and, you know, couldn't keep
her hands off me.

And now she just...

I did. I would, like,
want to rape her

every time I saw her.

And I would just
grab her and hug her and...

I get--I get in my head.

I have a lot going on.

And I've been pissed off
lately at her.

I don't...Want to come home
and rip your clothes off.

Really?
You've been pissed off at me?

Just because of, like,
the whole, like, money thing.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.
God.

If you stop, it's harder...

To get back.
And I know that.

And I feel like
it's getting to that point.

So she needs to feel
connected, right?

I can work on that.
Okay?

I'll be better.

Well, hey.

Hi.
I'm tired.

Yeah.

I got wine.
You want some?

This how lesbians open wine.

I wasn't going to.

- How did you get
a-a bruised lip?

- It's a mystery bruise.
- Yeah.

No, I swear to God.

- So the rumors are true.
- No, no, no, no, no, no.

Wait a minute.
Wait just a minute.

I love how fast word travels.

Wait, why?
What word did you hear?

- Nothing.
- What?

- Nothing.
- Tell me.

I just heard that you
hooked up with Sara again.

And who told you that?

- Does it matter?
- Yeah, it does matter.

It does. It does.
It doesn't.

It doesn't matter.
Who told you that?

I'm not telling you.
It doesn't matter.

I'm not telling you.
Who the fuck told you that?

I'm not telling you.

Tell me the first letter
of their name.

No, I'm not telling you,
is what I just said.

Point is, is what happens.

I can't believe, like,
seriously--

- no, hold on a second.

Whitney has an alternate life.

What the fuck
are you talking about, dude?

- Because, like, I was--
when I--

before, she was like,

"fuck Sara and her fake tits."
And--

and, "I can't stand
that bitch."

And then she sleeps with her.

I feel like all of us
have been there

to pick up the pieces
of this really

tumultuous relationship
for a whole year now.

And I think, you know,
we're all exhausted by that.

And I can't understand

why she's not completely
exhausted by it.

How did it go from,

"go ahead and punch
her fake titties"--

- all right, let's not
talk about that.

Well, you said
it doesn't matter.

You said it, not me.
Um...

You don't have to answer
to anybody.

You're goddamn right I don't,

'cause I'm a fucking adult,
number one.

And number two--

- you don't have
to answer to me.

I'm just your best friend

asking you questions,
that's all.

But I'm saying, like,
I can either

get butt hurt over shit,

or I can just like take it
like I already did.

I'm single, and I do
what I want to do.

I have no idea what it is
about Sara

that makes Whitney keep
going back to her.

I really don't even think

there's a decision-making
process.

It's like--she, like,
sprinkled voodoo dust

on top of Whitney's head.

I think she's hypnotized.

I need a cigarette.

♪ Got a style
so cool about you ♪

♪ make me wanna know
a little more about you ♪

♪ not trying to be rude when
I push up on you and I say ♪

Moving to L.A., I was hoping
to reconnect with Whitney,

but I haven't spent
any time with Whitney

since I've been here, really.

And I don't like feeling like

I'm not important.

It's kind of a slap
in the face.

It's a slap in the vaj.

It hurts.

You know, masturbation
makes you feel good.

And when you're pissed off,
it's great.

I'm totally gay gold star,

but for some reason,
chicks sucking dick--

got it.

'Cause they look like
they're whores.

I'm not sure what Whitney
and Sara's deal is.

I think Whitney is making
stupid decisions.

And she's thinking
with her little head

and not her big one.

Oh, my God.
Ohh.

She hasn't held Sara
accountable

for anything that she's done.

Oh, my God. Oh!

Oh!

Ah!

Ohh! Ohh!

Oh, my God.

Ohh.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.
Fuck.

Ahh.

Yay.

Oh, my God, I need a cigarette.

♪ Dreamin' of the time ♪

♪ you'll notice I'm alive ♪

♪ I'm feeling ♪

♪ I'm falling for you ♪

♪ each step I take ♪

♪ feel like I'm crying ♪

- Hi.
- Welcome home.

Good. How are you?

- I started cutting up the gar--
I'm gonna make the broccoli.

Do you know what I'm making?

You're making the mahi mahi,
but I'm making the garlic.

Now that Claire is here,

I'm not sure
what's gonna happen.

Mm, what happened
to the cutting board?

I don't know, but I searched
all over for it.

Your first love

is always gonna have
that place in your heart.

Did you know, when I was little,
I used to love Ricky Martin?

I thought he was so sexy.

Now he's gay, just like you.

And obviously,
I'm not over her.

It's like you try not
to have feelings for people.

But the thing's still there,

you know, in my heart
or wherever it is.

I've gotten good at things.

Are you Martha Stewart yet?

But then, she still
has a girlfriend.

Like, I just feel like
it's kind of scary.

- Betty cracker?
- You're so mean.

Betty cracker.

I like this workin' out,
cookin'.

It's like...
A changed woman.

Francine and I aren't
the same people

that we were when we dated.

I dated her from 19 to 23,
and now I'm 26.

So it's like I've grown up
since then.

I'm not that kid that I was
when I dated her.

How many years has it been
since we cooked dinner together?

It's been a long time, Claire.

Don't you like how
I'm talking to you now?

Really trying to not be--

- not Nazi over--
- Not be controlling.

Claire keeps talking
about how she changed.

And she's grown up now.

And I really want
to believe her.

But, you know, actions speak
louder than words.

So we'll see what happens.

Do you like my collection
of lesbian magazines?

Why don't I invite my mom over

and go like this...

I dated Claire for a long time.

But, um, my parents
don't know I'm gay.

These aren't Claire's.

My mother, she's like,

"well, how are you going
to have a baby

if you keep hanging around
with girls?"

And I'm like, "oh, my God."

"Herro."

- Look at--this is
the girl you're gonna die over.

- Who?
- Look at her.

I'm still thinking
about the perfect way

to tell them.

You know, like, write it
in a fortune cookie.

Surprise!
Just kidding.

Okay, cheers to Claire.

Cheers to us, um,
getting along...

From now on.
Okay.

- Cheers.
- Cheers.

♪ Uhh ♪

♪ ♪

Where are you?

Oh!

Oh.

Right here.

I'm gonna hang up.

Today I'm going out to march

in the Martin Luther King
parade

with a group from
the gay and lesbian center.

Hey. I'm chanel.

Y'all love having me wait.
I'm real sorry.

You know it's always
Marissa's fault.

- Here's your bagel.
- Thank you.

Why am I being blamed for that?

Huh? 'Cause it's
always your fault.

I'm second.
How are you?

Good.

Been out here a long time?

- A little bit.
I got here--

well, I got here
extra earlier than I planned--

- oh, yeah, that's right.
You said no traffic.

- None.
- The first time I met chanel,

she was, like, all covered up.

She had, like,
this long-sleeved shirt

and, like, long pants.

And this time, she had on,
like, this white tank,

whatever, and like, like,
breasts were all up and shit.

Like, ahh, she's the shit.

How we gonna walk like this?
We're gonna go like this.

Wait, no, see?
You're already wrong.

You gotta go, like,
over the leg.

- That ain't gonna work.
- Okay, look.

Can--do you know
how to dance?

- A little bit.
- You know how to move?

Okay.

You're gonna--
you're gonna move that leg.

And then you're gonna
put in--no.

Then you're gonna
put this in front of me.

In front of you?
Hold on.

See?

I'm supposed to walk
down the street like that?

- Yeah.
- That's so gay.

♪ ♪

I'm a direct beneficiary
of the civil rights movement,

you know, and all the work
that m.L.K. Did.

And I feel like this is
the civil rights movement

of our day.

So it's important to me
to be a part of it

to draw that correlation,

to make sure that people
see that gay and lesbian rights

are just as important
as, you know, race relations

were in the '50s and '60s.

I kind of held on to chanel
throughout the entire parade,

because...

Like, I always talk about
the work that I do.

But having her close by

just kind of really
gave it meaning, you know?

Like, it gave me
the emotional element.

You know, like, this is why
I'm out fighting for gay rights

so that I can spend
my life with you.

Well, my time
at the moment--

not my life.
That sounds like forever.

♪ My love ♪

♪ give it to you, baby ♪

♪ don't throw it ♪

I kind of want to talk to you,

but I-I need you
to promise

not to say anything to Whitney.

I can't promise you that.
What is it, first?

- So, okay, Sara and Whitney
really cuddly-cuddly.

- Uh-huh.

And I'm a little confused,

just because...

When I left New York,

um, Sara was trying
to get a job at arrojo.

And hana and her--
- In New York?

Yeah, and asking me advice.

And, like...
Hana was like,

"yeah, we're getting
back together, you know."

Hana is Sara's ex, and, um,

before I came to L.A.,

she would ask me if I could
get Sara a job interview.

But not to tell Whitney.

And it seemed very shady.

I got a text yet again today.

I mean, I have it all
on my phone.

I just don't know
exactly what I should do,

because I don't want to seem
to Whitney like...

You know, I'm...
A tattletale.

Well, why don't you...?

Make it easy on yourself--
I'll tell her.

Rachel, you might not want
to say anything,

but Whitney is my best friend,
and I live with her.

And I've watched her go through

the gamut of emotions
with Sara.

And if this is real
and what you're saying

is, you know,
actually happening,

it's absolutely
my responsibility

as a friend to tell her this.

Are you fucking kidding me?

Well, hana asked me,
um, about the salon.

She's like, "yo, can you
get Sara a job?"

- Mm-hmm.

And I was like, "yeah,
you know, I'll hook her up.

Like, you know,
be an assistant."

She's like, "oh, no,
she doesn't want to do that."

I was like, "well, she's
probably gonna have to do that."

You know what I mean?

So they had a conversation
back and forth,

and they were talking about it.

And you saw a text...

- I saw the text--
- That was like--

she told hana that she wanted
to get back with her

and move to New York.
Yes, that's what they said.

That's what hana said.

I wanted her to see, you know.

So I let her read

all the text messages
between me and hana.

And also, she made me swear
not to say anything,

which I thought was weird.

It's so manipulative,

and it's so shitty.

And you better fuckin' believe

that Sara will be knowing

that there will be nothing
fucking between us

from this point on.

I was just opening my doors
up to her again.

So I feel really fucking
betrayed and played.

If I can't learn from this...

Red, screaming flag,
like, then I'm a fucking idiot.

Somebody's shady as fuck,
and somebody's lying.

And the common denominator
is always fuckin' Sara.

Tonight you better believe
that I'm gonna

fuckin' let her know
I know what's up,

'cause this isn't going on
one day longer like this.

♪ Hands down,
wanna break my fall ♪

♪ 'cause I could fall
too hard ♪

♪ it seems so glamorous ♪

Black and I'm proud,
I'm here to stay.

Wait, I said it all wrong?

So cute!

I think the parade
actually showed a lot

about my character to chanel.

Wanna do your little walk?

Yes, that you didn't practice.

You're so gay.

And I'm seeing, like, a whole
nother part of her.

Like she's--like she's
in her own element.

I'm glad you came.
I'm glad I came.

That was empowering.

It was special.

It was a bunch of black people

in a positive setting.

♪ The more I think about you ♪

♪ the more I think I want ya ♪

♪ ooh ooh ♪

♪ ah ah ah ah ah ah ♪

♪ 'cause you're all
I wanna do ♪

By the end of the parade,

like, she's really feeling me,
you know?

Stop acting like you like me.

Stop acting
like you like me, shit!

And, uh, I kind of got rewarded

with a little kiss
before she left, so...

That was our first kiss.

♪ Baby, baby ♪

♪ all I wanna do ♪

♪ Is get with you ♪

Stop fighting it.

All right, get out of here
before your mother kill me.

Yeah.

♪ The more I think I want ya ♪

Fuck me.

♪ Do do ♪

♪ whoa oh oh oh oh oh ♪

♪ 'cause you're all
I wanna do ♪

- Hey, guys!
- Hi.

- How are you?
- Hi.

Mwah!
Good to see you.

- Mwah. Ohh.
- She's right around there.

Once we lost
the donor that we knew,

we wanted to set up dinners
with a few of our guy friends.

I haven't even had a drink yet.

I know that kacy loves Olivier,

and I really love Paulo.

He's adorable.
He's Italian.

I thought you were
gonna have wine.

If he was up for it,
I wouldn't mind him

being a donor.

Uh, I actually had a question

that I wanted to ask you both.

- Here it comes.
- So--yeah.

If we asked you...

To donate your sperm
for us to start a family,

what would you say?

Be honest!
Be honest.

I would say no.

No?

- All right.
- No.

Because--
- Why?

I know you, and so...

The thing is,
if I give you the sperm,

I know that you want that baby
to be yours, you know?

And...As we're friends,
it's gonna be hard.

We cannot talk about it,
you know.

It's not something I even
thought about doing.

I don't know.

It's not the physical,
you know,

material thing of it
that is the issue.

You know, it's just the fact
that, one, I do know you.

We are really good friends.
We're in each others' lives.

There's, like,
involvement there.

You wouldn't be able to just
detach yourself and say...

No.

"I'm doing a good thing
for my good friends"?

No.

Their attachment
to their sperm shocks me.

I guess the difference is,

if either one of you
needed an egg,

I would have no issue.

You would have no issue at all?

The reason why we would
do it for them

is because we love them
so much.

And the reason why
they wouldn't do it for us

is 'cause they like us.

It's so fucking ridiculous!

It's just like, "I hate you.
Here's my shit.

Do with it
what you will."

But, "like, I love you so much,

"it would be hard for me
to watch you

raise a child I helped make."

They're entitled
to their feelings.

Absolutely.

We are not entitled
to their sperm.

I feel very honored, though,

to even be thought about.

- Yeah, me too.
- Really.

I mean, that's a big deal.

And for someone to ask you that
is, you know--

you must think
really highly of me.

I don't know why, but...

I mean, I think the thing

that bit us in the ass is that

we think that you care
very much about family

and values.

And it clearly
worked against us.

If you guys were
a little douchier...

I know, it probably would work.

We just thought
it would be easier.

And now we have to
go down a different path.

I'm very tired
of talking about sperm.

- Oh, my God.
- I've had my fill.

No pun intended.

Sounds like a fun night to me.

Babe...

Where are you?

Right here, hon.

Hi.

- You look cute.
- I wanna change.

I forgot what you
looked like when you left.

Come...

I'm tired.

Did you make my food?

Mmm.
Oh, your food.

I literally, like,
just finished.

So how was your day?

Good. I'm just tired.

I'm currently working
at Marc Jacobs.

But don't want to be working
paycheck to paycheck

the rest of my life
every day in retail.

Baby, will you get me
my little slippers?

I went to school for makeup.

I've been doing makeup
for the last 10, 11 years.

You made yourself some food?
Thank you.

But then this last year,
I lost my job,

and I was, like, struggling,
and then I was broke.

It's been really hard.

Yeah, I'm shaky.

Why?

I didn't eat very much today.

I was just like running
around all day--I was busy.

If kelsey was to step it up
and get a full-time job,

I would know that, like,

my job wasn't the sole...

Income of us,

where, as of now,

if it isn't coming from me,

we're fucked.

It's a lot to have
on one person

in a relationship.

If I give you money,

will you run down
and get some alcohol?

- Uh-huh.

Because of that pressure
when I get off work,

my head doesn't turn off
unless I'm drinking.

And then we can have
like a little buzz in us

before we go.

It's gonna be crazy.

I'm gonna need a drink.

All right, what should I get?

Just get a thing of vodka,

and then get, um...

Some soda water.

Like the glass one?

Yeah.

Girl! All right, baby.
I'll be back.

♪ It's a simple computation ♪

♪ you take easy conversation ♪

♪ add erotic exploration,
adoration ♪

♪ but when he said
I love you, girl ♪

So what's the deal,
frannie, for tonight?

Your friends gonna be there,
Francine?

Yeah, some of them.

I'm gonna be nervous.

Grab the bottle of wine.
Let's just finish it.

Tonight Claire and I
are going to haute.

Um, it is a girls' party.

What is this?

What?
It's my favorite hat.

We're having
a good time together.

And I know that I have
a lot of flaws too, you know.

I need to learn
how to let things go.

I need to learn how to move on
from the past,

and if we're gonna work
on something,

then I need to drop that anger.

And I need to move forward
and see

if we can really
make this happen.

And I think we can.

With slutty shoes on.

A slutty face on.

Just kidding.

♪ ♪

All right, these people
are all with me.

I don't know if that matters.

- Hi.
- Hi.

- Give me a hug.
- Claire.

So nice to meet you.

I've heard so much about you.

- Welcome.
- Thank you.

Claire.
Nice to meet you, finally.

I've heard nice things.

Claire and I met up

with a lot of the other girls.

I knew a fair amount
of people there.

Nice to meet you, finally.
I've heard nice things.

- Yeah? Who?
- Ruby.

Yeah? Oh, yeah.

She's a very good
friend of mine.

We're all coming over
on Monday.

It's like such a small world,

because I feel like
everyone's connected,

especially, like,
in the gay world.

It's like friends of friends.

Like two degrees of separation.

It's a big cesspool.
No, I'm kidding.

Uh, issa, her friend,
just texted me today.

- Issa is--used to be
my roommate.

- Nuh-uh!
- We lived together.

♪ Hey, pretty lady ♪

- ♪ pretty lady ♪
- ♪ Hey, pretty baby ♪

I noticed that Rachel
and Romi were flirting.

And my initial thought was,
"what's going on?"

- I'm getting a drink.
- Okay, you get a drink.

Look at you guys!

We're getting along.
Can you believe it?

We are,
we're getting along today.

- We are getting along.
- Tomorrow might be--

- good, I like when
you guys are getting along.

Oh, no, no, no.

It's either really good
or really bad.

We get to the bar,
and we're having a lot of fun.

Claire was being
very well behaved

and being really nice.

These are my friends.

And very warm
and affectionate towards me,

which I didn't expect.
It felt great.

♪ Way down, stand in line ♪

'Cause, trust me,

I saw it first fucking hand.

I'm saying, Sara, like,
"why, dude?"

Like, do you understand, like,
literally last week,

like, I felt like...
Like...

No, you don't understand.

I already told you
what my side of it was.

Sara wants to act
like everything's fine

and everything's kosher,

and let's just go back to being
all happy and lovey-dovey.

And, like, no, that's not
how it's gonna play out.

How could you see a text
message that I sent to her?

Don't worry about it.
Like, I saw it, trust me.

- But what are you mad about?
Like, I already told you--

- what am I mad about, Sara?
Really?

- Yeah.
- Really?

What am I mad about?
Yeah.

- I don't know if you think
I don't see things, but I--

- I mean, I haven't
talked to hana

in a really long time.
Really?

When's the last time
you talked to hana?

- Today.
- Okay.

- But...
- All right, good.

But I don't go run off
and kiss girls.

No, I'm not gonna do that.

Well, you did, hon.

We're sitting in the cabana,

and I have Rachel to my left,
Romi to my right.

And they kiss.

Me?

- You just made--
you just kissed her.

Like...

How easy you did that.

So easily, you just kissed her.

You're gonna leave me.

I'm not gonna leave you,
but, like,

you just so easily kissed her.

Do you want a threesome?

No.

Then why would you do that?

I'm sorry, wait.
Come again?

You've always been here for me?

Really? Really, Sara?

I haven't?
I mean...

What are you mad about?

- So give it a second,
dude, like--

- why?
- Because I'm--I'm upset, Sara.

I never lied to you about shit!

Oh, really?

When I looked in
your fucking eyes?

Really?
When I looked in your eyes?

But did I say no?

Like I would ever
fucking do that.

You lied!
You're such a fucking liar!

Are you serious
right now, Sara?

Really?

I'm kind of new
to the whole game out here.

And I really want to steer clear
of any drama.

And that's just all I'm seeing
from all of these girls.

Give me my cigarette back,
please. Can I have it?

Fuck you, Sara.

All right, fine.

I wasn't raised to start
screaming at people

at nightclubs.

Control yourself.

Yeah, I'm sure.
You fuckin' will.

Peace out!

Bye!

What?

I'm aggravated
at some bullshit.

Let's just get
your shit, and let's go.

I don't wanna, like--
- Go home?

Yeah, I wanna go.

I gave Sara so many chances

and so much of myself.

And, like, I'm always
left high and dry.

So whatever, like, it's...

It was a very clarifying
moment tonight.

♪ ♪

All right.

All right.
Give me your phone.

Let's call a cab.

We need to go home.

Sit in this chair.

No, I'll get it.

- Honestly, we're--

tomorrow we're rethinking
our whole relationship.

- We are?
- Yeah, we are.

- Oh, we are?
- Yeah, we are.

Oh, tomorrow
we rethink everything?

- When you're fuckin' sober,
we're--

yeah, we're fucking re--
- Oh.

You just fucking
made out with her.

I was not making out with her.

I was, like, drunk and wasted.

I'm not...

- Babe--babe,
we're waiting for our cab.

Romi!

Baby, bullshit aside...

Bullshit aside.

Should I call it?

Taxi.

♪ Doctor, doctor ♪

♪ I'm already back for more ♪

♪ I tried to bottle you up ♪

♪ but that shit
just didn't work ♪

♪ I just can't let it go ♪

♪ losing control ♪

♪ I wish I never
decided to explore ♪

♪ I need a f-f-fix ♪

- Hey.
- Hey, what are you doing?

Nothing.
I miss you.

I miss you too.

You look cute.

I love you.

How's L.A.?

It's good.

It's like--
it's taking a bit

of getting used to the driving

and the bars closing
at 1:30, but I love it.

We walk in the front door,

and the first thing she does
is call her ex-girlfriend

and is, like,
lovey-dovey to her.

And, like, that I can't stand.

It's like, you're
telling me you love me,

but then you're telling your
ex-girlfriend you love her.

Or whatever they are.
And it's--

I just don't think it's fair
to either of us.

And I don't appreciate that.

I already have places
I want to take you

when you come here.

I'm just over it.

You're still my screen saver.

Am I still your screen saver?

Where's my phone?

I better be, woman.

- Ta-da!
- Oh, good, it's me.

Mwah!

I may have a job out there
while I'm there.

Well, that's good,
but you got jobs with me,

so don't make your schedule
too crazy.

- Well, you are
a full-time job.

Yeah.

At haute, when we were being
affectionate with each other,

she did tell me
some really sweet things.

And I actually believed her.

A lot of times, Claire says
the sweetest things,

but her words don't match up
with her actions.

And that's where I get
really upset.

All right, boo.

I love you.

Love you too, baby.

Okay, bye.

Bye.

At this point,
you know, I just...

Take it day by day,
go with the flow.

♪ Is this how
you destroy me? ♪

♪ is this how you destroy me? ♪

♪ is this how
you destroy me? ♪

♪ is this how you
destroy me? ♪

♪ is this
how you destroy me? ♪

♪ is this how
you destroy me? ♪

♪ is this how you destroy me? ♪

I feel like shit.

Do you know what
you did last night?

- Mm-mm.

You kissed Rachel.

- Like, how--I don't--
I don't remember it, babe.

Like, I don't remember.

I was sitting
right next to you.

You leaned over me to kiss her.

Apparently,
last night my behavior

was out of control.

How did we get home last night?

I don't remember things,
and that scares me.

I was just making out with her?

You just reach over
and you just grab her face

and you start kissing her.

It's like this time,
you kiss her.

What if something else
happens if I'm not there,

and you're drinking?
Like...

I don't even, like,
like Rachel like that.

I don't even think
of Rachel that way.

This had been happening
and building up and building up.

And there's one thing when
you're blacking out

and hurting yourself,

but there's another thing
when you start hurting

the people that you love
around you.

You're just making out
with girls in front of me.

I can't handle that.

What if I was to to do that?

I just don't even
know what to say.

This morning I just
looked at myself and said,

"you are done."

I never want
to lose my girlfriend

because I did something
I would never do

in a blacked-out stage.

I can't do this anymore.

♪ Hello again ♪

♪ hello, baby ♪

♪ I'm glad you're here ♪

I'm sorry.

♪ I need you close to me ♪

Operation find sperm,
stage two.

Selection.

"Our donors' personal
health and family history

are carefully screened through
a comprehensive questionnaire."

They're not just taking
every Joe shmoe off the street.

So this is 5% of the 1%.

Yeah.
At this point,

I don't care
where it comes from anymore.

Can you order it online?

Can they ship it to your house?

Okay, so if we want to, like,
see his picture

and hear his interview,

we have to pay $200.

All right.

Shall we?

This is kind of a moment.

Right now we're buying
access to sperm.

I know.

We don't need to find a lawyer.

We don't have to have paper--
papers drawn up.

We order it.
They send it to our doctor and--

- 1214.

We sweet talk our doctor
into giving it to us

so we can do it at home.

All right.

Mm, we did it.

So do a search.

So you wanna do a basic search

before we, um--
- Sure.

He has a b.S.
In mechanical engineering.

Chinese and Colombian?

This guy's 5'10", 195.

That's...
Good.

Our kid would need braces.

- Those are some thick--
- Ooh, serious eyebrows.

- Some thick-ass eyebrows.

He's got little feet.

That's not good,
if we have a boy.

I didn't have anything
that I specifically

was looking for in a donor.

Kacy, of course,

we both wanted somebody
that looked like her.

No one's as cute as her.

Um, but I mean,
all of the donors,

they're all college graduates.

They're all smart.
They're all athletic.

I mean, every
single one of them

has these amazing qualities.

Let's just do a search,
just quick, me.

- Okay.
- So everything that I've got.

Um...

- Be sure to double-click
big boobs also.

Where are the Italian guys?

Come on, guys.
Look, he's an Italian.

Oh, he's cute!
He's cute!

Olive skin.

He's in advertising/
copyrighting.

Me. Basketball.
L.A. laker fan.

And he looks really Italian.

Don't you think that's nice?

- Yeah.
- I like that guy.

It's me.
You're cuter.

He's in our favorites.
Let's keep looking.

This is good.

In, you know,
less than an hour?

That's true.

Like, it really gives me hope.

I definitely feel more
in control of the situation.

Yeah.
I'm totally shocked,

because I was so against this.

I mean, this was not something
I thought would happen--

that I would be
this comfortable and excited

about some random
stranger's sperm.

But the end
is what's important.

And that's kacy and I
starting a family

and having a baby, and...
We're getting there.

Is that what you want?
Is that what you want?

Give me--come on!

You're right back on me.
Right back on me.

Mmm, we should close
the blinds.

♪ Mmm ♪

♪ ooh ♪

♪ painless, I know about pain ♪

- Whew.
- They're home.

I'm hungry.

- Did you get tuna?
- No, Turkey.

What happened last night?

We were out and, like,
Rachel...

Whitney's ex-girlfriend
has been in town,

and, like, for some reason,
there's been this, like,

attraction and I'm flirting
with her when I'm drunk.

And like--but I didn't
even know it happened.

- You don't remember any of it?
- No, no.

Oh, rom...

It was bad, I mean...

We talked about it.
We've made up.

Like, we're past it.

But it's not okay for me

to just lightly
brush it off and say,

"oh, this is allowed to happen
because I'm a drunk."

No.

You have to realize
having bipolar--

I mean, you and alcohol?

Not a good--
not a good mix.

Romi, when she was 14,

out of nowhere told me
she was suicidal.

And I had to put her
in a hospital.

And at that time,
they diagnosed her

with having bipolar disorder.

They said it always
had been there,

but it just really
manifested itself

when she hit puberty.

But it's been happening
more...Consistently,

and I'm waking up,
and I'm like,

"I'm fuckin' scared."

And the only way
to prevent it is

to not be drinking right now.

But it's like I am
29 years old.

- Yeah.
- I need to, like,

move forward?

Are you gonna do,
like, a.A.?

Are you gonna--
- I don't wanna do a.A.

I think it's gonna take
a lot of, like,

not going out as much,

just so you can get used to it.

It's unrealistic.
Like, I'm gonna go out.

Mm.

I'm gonna be around my friends.

So are you supportive
of her not drinking?

I'm very supportive
of her not drinking,

because I don't like the way
she acts when she drinks.

She has a drinking problem too,

but that's for her
to figure out.

You know what I mean?
Like...

That's her own journey,
her own path.

I don't think I have
a drinking problem.

Well, then there,
so she doesn't have one.

- I don't.
- I mean, I think you do.

'Cause I love you,
I'll tell you that.

'Cause I've seen how much
you can drink too.

- Yeah.
- You can put a lot down.

Yeah, I know.

So then she can drink and...

Do her thing.

- Do you have concerns?
- Yeah, major concerns.

It's gonna suck.

Like, honestly.

♪ ♪

Oh, so what do you think
about this?

Oh, that looks good.

And then I just add
namiwave llc,

parentheses, namiwave. Com

is a blah blah blah blah blah.

Then the first time
that I actually mention

the DVD-vending business
is down in the position.

Yeah, that's good.
Yeah.

- Okay.
- Perfect.

I told you, like,

Claire's still staying with me.

So I don't know...

Less stressful to be here.

I just don't get it.

I just don't get what...

Is going on, like...

You know what I mean?

Like, don't tell me you love me

and then act...Crazy.

- Well, she knows that--
I mean, you know,

she keeps on saying
that she wants to...

To, like, get back together
with you, right?

Which is total lies.

A total lie.

Like, last night,

she was video chatting
with Vivian.

That's really not trying

to work things out with someone.
No.

That's like stringing
both parties along.

Like, you can't try
to figure something out

when you're still wavering.

And I'm not--
I'm not interested in that.

- Yeah.
- It's toxic.

It's a very toxic relationship.

And I don't know why
we still continue this.

It's like you either need to...

Go with your girlfriend or not.

♪ ♪

♪ so I'll hang on to you ♪

There's lighters galore
sprinkled about...

Illustrating
our very healthy lifestyle.

I feel like Cleopatra here.

I'm just gonna do this.

So are you tired?

Yeah. I'm exhausted.

I feel like...

I'm just worn down.

I mean, have you talked?

Have I talked to her?

Um...Briefly.

But she was still
illustrating the same points

of denying everything
and just...

Trying to reiterate the fact

that she loves me,
and she doesn't understand

why I'm not believing her.

You know, you don't have to
sort everything out right now.

No, I know.

I'll just start
a 12-step program...

S.A., Saras anonymous.

Ohh. Sorry.

I don't see you
vulnerable a lot.

And I feel like right now
you're really vulnerable.

- No.
- Yes, you are.

I mean, you are, a little.
Like, you can't help it.

Yeah.
I'm a dainty flower.

Well, you can be, actually.

It's just, like, fucked up,
because her life

is very much intertwined
with mine.

Oh, no, I don't know
what that's like.

- I know.
- Not at all.

Right.

I mean, how are you feeling

with me being out here?

I mean, I feel good
about you being out here.

Yeah. I surprisingly
feel totally zen.

I feel fine too.

I don't know what's going on,

but I feel so fine
with everything.

Yeah.

I'm glad that we are
communicating.

- Yeah, me too.
- You know?

Me too.

Rachel has been here
for a few days now.

And, honestly,

it's much more pleasant
than I thought it would be.

I was a little nervous
coming in--I'm not gonna lie.

Like, she has a history
of being a little intense.

But now she's here.

And things are actually good.

Like, she's much more
laid-back,

and I'm pretty much
done with Sara.

So if I'm single
and she's single,

It could happen.

Frannie, let's just
sit here and talk.

Francine had
a late night at work.

And so she walked in,
and she was not happy,

from the get-go.

Don't be an asshole.

Why is it that you feel
like I'm such an asshole?

Because you came here
to work things out.

- I've tried and--
- You've tried, Claire?

You were an asshole
the entire time.

- I can't speak a word--
I can't speak

unless you speak for me.

Wow.

Francine, both of you know

what I'm doing,
so therefore--

- so that's why I'm taking
myself out of the situation,

because I don't need to wait
around for an asshole like you

that makes me feel like
shit about myself all the time,

because I have been stuck
in that for so long,

and I am really hard on myself,

and you're even harder,
and that sucks.

I'm not in love
with two different people.

Why are you trying to bullshit?

No, I am not trying
to bullshit.

Why are you trying to paint me
out to be such a bad person?

I'm not painting you out
to be any way.

This is how I feel about you!

I am bad. I did wrong.
I did you wrong.

I'm not doing this.
I'm not doing this right now.

'Cause you look at me
and tell me

we're gonna get married
and whatever, and I believe it,

and then as soon as you
walk in the door,

you're calling up
some other chick,

telling her
that you love her too.

And that feels like shit.
Okay?

Okay?

I just feel like
such the bad guy,

and I hate that feeling.

She doesn't listen to me.
She doesn't hear me.

She--she just thinks
of all the things

that I did to her in the past.

We were each others'
first serious girlfriends.

I mean, you know?

And we made a lot of mistakes.

But it's like,
I'm not the same girl,

and she just won't let--
she will not let the past go.

So it's, like--

it's a hard thing to do,
you know?

But she was my first love,
and I haven't given up.

And it's just--it's like
I'm sad that I haven't given up,

and I'm also sad
that I haven't moved on.

I mean, that's why I'm here.
I'm not here--

like, if it didn't mean
something, I wouldn't be here.

And it's like I've tried so hard
to get over it,

and I've failed so miserably.

I can't talk about it.

♪ What does it feel like? ♪

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