Original subtitles

We are heading into one of the harshest winters on the planet.

There's no finish line.

But there is $250,000 waiting for the last person.

It's so cold.

Cold like this can kill you.

I can't feel my face.

I can't feel my hands.

This weather's going to sort a few people out.

The wolves howling across the lake send shivers up your spine.

You've got wolverines, wolves, bears.

It's a whole new frontier.

Alone season four, the Arctic.

It's on like Donkey Kong.

The mind's unravelling.

It's gone completely tits up.

I didn't think it would be easy,

but I didn't think it would be this hard.

The landscape doesn't care if you live or die.

I can feel my body dissolving.

Look, look, look.

that is so beautiful.

The northern lights are out.

The magic in the air.

Permanent now. And here forever.

God!

I need to be here till the end. I'm not tapping.

- Dinner!

Hello?

Hello? He's not here.

Hello, mate?

He's gone. He's actually gone. He's missing. Call it in.

We need immediate backup for search and rescue.

I think we're home.

This just got serious.

We are heading into one of the harshest winters on this planet.

It's going to be a nightmare if you're not prepared.

This is going to be crazy.

Australians think they know what they're in for.

They have no idea.

I was born in the Arctic Circle.

Have a look at this. I'll be able to use him for bait.

There's a fish on there.

got him.

Another one!

Another one to Trent.

There's the liver.

101 days. Here we come.

So hard.

I come from a life of a lot of trauma.

My body's like, "I thought you'd left that tough life behind."

I'm in this constant fight or flight mode.

okay, that really hurt.

I'm really afraid of doing more damage to this hip.

I was going to move into my permanent shelter today, and I need to move

all my stuff.

I can't do the movements I need to get things done.

my hip.

it's so sore.

I don't know what to do.

I can't carry the Peli case up the hill.

I can't.

I physically cannot with this hip.

It's going to destroy me.

Honestly, just, I feel like giving up.

I think I'm going to tap out.

I had so many plans. I had so many plans.

It was a dream to come here, and it's not enough time.

It's really not.

This hair.

I got my hair done for this because I had such a good idea.

Colouring, I don't just have wacky coloured hair usually.

I never colour my hair, ever, ever, ever.

I was going to make these awesome lures, like really cool lures.

I was going to cut a bit of the hair off and make little jigs out

of them so I could go ice fishing and I could work the whole water column.

I was going to get a combination of colours that were suitable for the

species out here.

And I was so excited to do it.

No, I didn't come... I did not come this far just to get this far.

No way, this can't be the end.

I'm not going. I'm not going.

Hell, no.

Not till I've made this lure and caught a fish with this hair.

I'm not a quitter.

Do it, do it, do it.

I'm moving, I'm moving.

We're in the boreal forest in the Arctic Circle.

It's just pain, it's just pain.

We're doing it, we're not giving up, we're going up the hill.

Come on, you can do this.

just a couple of metres.

Don't put it down, don't put it down, don't put it down.

Okay, okay, okay, just bear it, just bear it.

Get it in.

I did it.

Okay, we are going to put you here.

I did it.

I did it, I moved it.

that was intense.

But the hardest bit's done, holy shit.

20 minutes ago, I did not think that was going to happen.

I don't know where that came from,

but I just ignored the pain and I pushed through.

Okay, I've got to keep going.

Bit of hip pain.

Harden the fuck up, Alyce.

Guys done crazy things.

shit.

That was funny.

See how slow your reaction time gets when you...

I'm fucking hungry.

I think I'm going to go back to bed.

What was that?

Over there.

Guys, there's deer here.

They're so beautiful.

I don't want to spook them.

there's more. there's more.

So quiet, like here I am stomping through the bush, making a ruckus,

and they're just being peaceful, one with nature, you know?

this is magic.

This is so magic.

They're so cute when they run.

When I first landed here, I thought I was so prepared.

I just really wanted to win, but, God, like I just didn't expect it to

remind me of every traumatic experience I've ever had.

I've spent a few years in a car, you know?

It's not my first rodeo of tough places to be, you know?

You know, for the first time in my life, I have a home...

..with a loving partner and a beautiful community.

A lone reindeer.

Reindeers are in herds.

They're not solo animals, and I feel, for the first time in my life...

..yeah, I've got my herd, you know?

And I think, I want to go back to that herd, you know?

Misty?

I guess I'm saying it...

I'm officially tapping out.

I just don't want to be doing this alone, you know?

I've done it enough.

I feel so relieved about it, you know?

Like, just this impending doom.

And my body just was like, "No."

"No way are we going through more trauma again

"when you have a choice not to, you know?"

What are you feeling right now, Misty?

just my body's a bit in shock, you know?

A lot of shock.

And like, in a way, peace.

Like, once I made the phone call, it was like,

oh, I don't have to stay here, you know?

Just reminded me of all the tough times I've had

and how many times I've just had to endure it alone, you know?

And for the first time in my life, I actually don't have to do that.

Nature is my love, is my safe space.

And I had a magical day with reindeer coming through camp today.

And reindeer don't travel solo.

They travel in herd.

And I got my herd waiting for me back home, you know?

God, I just know I'm loved, you know?

I just want to hold everything dear to me...

so close.

OK.

Fireplace.

Day seven, no food, no problem.

And I was thinking maybe after one or two days, I'll be struggling.

Look at this.

But look, I'm still working like a horse.

I have my fireplace.

I have a shelter.

We're getting there.

I'll cook all of this today.

My little house is coming along.

Starting to feel like home.

Smell of mushrooms.

It's going to be so good.

I'm so happy.

I'm going to have to find more of them.

there's a grouse.

He's been having a little dirt bath like chickens do.

my guts is rumbling.

Imagine if you're allowed to hunt with a bow.

That'd be... easy shot.

God, I hope that doesn't make it on TV.

Welcome to another beautiful day

in Sapmi, on this wonderful lake that I'm now much closer to.

It's been a big week.

I feel like I'm going all right mentally.

that sun feels nice.

It was noticeably colder last night.

Bit of a stark reminder that winter's coming.

Already a few improvements on the old shelter.

I'm pretty happy.

Pretty happy with this little spot down here.

I'm concerned about how much weight I'm losing.

I'm going to spend the morning foraging,

eating berries and looking through logs.

I'll see if I can find grubs.

Then that's bait for me to fish with.

And then if I see anything in the water,

really focus on getting some fishing done.

I've just got to hope that I can get it out far enough.

Hopefully we can turn you into a fish.

It is really important that I get this first fish.

The sooner I can get some fish,

the sooner I can get some calories back into me.

I guess my technique's getting a little bit better.

Still not far enough out though.

If I can't get any soon, I might be in a bit of trouble.

Even the duck out there's not having much luck.

It's probably thinking the same thing.

"Where's all the fish?"

If I keep looking at all the signs here the land's trying to tell me,

that duck knows where all the fish are,

because it's going just about 30 metres out from the shoreline

and it goes all the way along.

They always go back to the centre of the lake.

Maybe that's where I need to go.

I'm building a damn boat in the Arctic.

Good thing I got two tarps.

Yeah, all right, that's the length I've got to play with.

I did collect some wood yesterday,

which might make the top frame to go around me and the one at the base.

I want it to be a little bit wide.

I also want it to be deep.

And then I'll have a bunch of little U-shaped pieces

going along the outside.

Never built a kayak before, so this is going to be a new experience.

It's a big task.

And I don't have a lot of calories to spend.

But I need fish.

I need fish so I can stay here for the long run.

I'm a Palawa boy from Tassie, from Lutruwita.

Everyone finds different ways to connect to their culture

and to their ancestors.

For me, it's in getting to spend my time out connecting with the land

and practising the things that my grandfather, my ancestors,

they used to practise.

A bit long, but that's all right.

no way.

It's a fucking reindeer.

Check this little guy out.

my God, he's coming up to me.

Guys, he's coming up to me.

Hey, little guy.

Hello.

Hey, mate.

Come check out my boat.

Hey.

damn, guys.

How cool is that?

He's just passing through.

At a lot of pivotal moments in my life, a lone white animal appears.

It might be some sort of albino of the species

or just a single white bird.

Mum says that's usually Granddad, or from Granddad.

That you know it's looking out for you.

You started on a path and it's just sort of like a reassurance.

I'm definitely meant to build this boat is what I'm feeling.

Yeah, it's really special.

I don't know. It's just crazy.

Today is my sister's birthday.

Happy birthday, Jordi!

I miss you lots.

And I'm sorry I can't be there right now.

But I promise I'll make it up to you on the next one.

God, I feel like the worst sister.

But a big reason why I'm doing this is for her.

I want her to see that I was uncomfortable.

I sat with it.

I've pushed through and I've given it my all.

If I can do this, then she's more than capable to do anything that she

wants to do in her life.

Today is the day where I need to find my sisu.

That extra fuel tank I didn't know I had.

Today is that day.

Because my body feels so low.

Let's go.

I haven't eaten in eight days besides blueberries.

And I'm super fragile at the moment.

So I'm just keeping that in mind.

Catching no fish is really starting to get to me.

It just feels like I'm not doing good enough.

Due to my own standards, of course.

So frustrating.

My body can't keep just eating blueberries,

as much as I would like to.

It needs fish to be happy and fish to survive.

I think I have something.

Or it's a snag.

It's a snag.

It scares me.

Like, what if I don't catch any fish today or tomorrow or the next day

or the next day or the next day or the next day or the next day?

Like, how much failure can I take?

no!

What did I pull that hard for?

She's gone.

My lure is gone.

My hook is gone.

My swivel is gone.

My sinker is gone.

It's not my idea of fun.

I don't like it.

I don't like it at all.

This isn't fun.

This is going to be one of the hardest things to ever record.

But I feel like I need to say it so you can understand a bit more

about why I've just been a blobbering mess.

I have struggled with a lot of mental health issues for quite a long time.

And it's been quite a struggle,

something that I've been hiding from everyone, from myself.

And...

..the reason I thought I could do this

is because I feel more comfortable alone.

I feel like when I'm alone,

I hide from the world

and I don't have to put on a smiling face

and I don't have to pretend to be happy when I'm not.

And being out here...

..I feel like all of those things have really hit me in the face.

And a lot of negative thoughts and feelings are coming up every day.

Because the truth is, mentally I'm struggling.

Mentally, there's this voice that's putting me down a lot

and I do a lot of work to keep that quiet

and to try and help and to try and fix it.

But the truth is, when I'm out here,

all of those coping mechanisms

and all of those things that I have in place are just ripped apart.

I've spent many days alone.

I've hiked alone.

I've been alone.

I've travelled alone.

But I've never just sat in one place alone.

And it's eating me up.

There's just no point being here, being miserable every day.

There's just no point going through that.

the Northern lights are out.

The magic in the air.

So pretty.

I'm going to take it as a good luck charm.

They're telling me to stay.

Putting on a show.

My connection with land isn't over.

I belong on this side of the world.

I think some sleep is going to do me some good.

Finding my sisu.

It's a little bit nippier than usual this morning.

Just a little bit.

It's got a little nip to it. Nothing crazy.

I'm a little bit chilly.

Yeah, I was zipped up in the sleeping bag last night.

Not much head sticking out or anything.

Just a little breather hole.

That was it.

Didn't even get sweaty.

So that's a measurement for you there.

That's a measurement for sure.

First thing, foraging.

Try and get any more mushrooms that I can get.

Just like a machine right now that just runs on mushrooms.

Whoo-ee!

Day's warming up.

I'm picking heaps of food.

Got a big old sack of mushrooms already.

Nice mushroom belly.

Check out this little lichen patch.

holy moly.

Something about the dry patches, the worms don't like it as much.

I'm going to try and get as much mushrooms as I possibly can because

they won't be here forever.

And they're valuable.

Very valuable.

And then smoke all of them.

And yeah, I'll be a big-time mushroom man.

Don't know what those are.

I don't know if anyone's ever credited lone success

to the majority of mushrooms, but I might be that guy.

I'm picking what's around, picking what's available to me right now.

But I want something more than mushrooms in my diet.

So I'm going to try out harvesting a bit of pine cambium.

That's the layer just underneath the bark that transports nutrients

throughout the tree.

It's got carbs in it, which I'm not getting maybe any of.

So I'm just getting the outer bark off first,

stripping that...

..and getting this white section all clean.

And then I should be able to go just up to the wood

and get these long strips.

And that is what I'm eating.

Cambium.

Not too much because if you overdo it, can block up the butt...

The butt!

Block up the guts so bad that, uh,

you, like, I'd have to leave because I would need a laxative.

Part of my strategy mentally out here is this thing called small hope.

It's a mindset that's helped me through difficulty in the past.

Try a bit of this cambium.

It's kind of like a hope in spite of circumstance.

No matter what the circumstance, you never know what tomorrow brings.

Very fibrous.

I've got mushrooms, I've got tree bark, I've got determination.

I'm gonna make a rod so I can cast out a bit further.

And even if I, like, completely flop at fishing,

that small hope tells me that, like, I can still win.

Fun.

Old, soggy, maggoty mushrooms.

Gosh, the things you do.

Just the texture... the flavour.

what I would give for a fish.

Pretty brisk this morning.

we've got a lovely day.

Look how good this lake is, man.

Look at this.

Not a fish in sight.

I'm surprised at this water here in this little bay.

How it's just so shallow.

It's just like a foot or two under the surface.

That's why I'm not catching anything.

So I don't want to waste my time fishing there.

Fuck that, I'm going for the deep.

the monsters from the deep.

It's what I want.

It's what's going to keep me alive out here.

I've got a plan.

All right, come on, Dougy, let's do this.

Right, Operation Canoe, or Kayak, whatever you want to call it.

Titanic.

What could possibly go wrong?

A sparky, pulling a canoe out of sticks and a tarp.

All right.

It might be a bit wide, but what do I know?

I'm really enjoying just being out here in the wild.

Even when I was a kid at school,

I was the only one out of all my mates

who would be out in the woods in the middle of the night,

poaching pheasants, and all my other mates would be out, you know,

smoking and drinking and all that crap.

All those skills combined gives me a real edge.

Once I get the braces on, it'll all come together, hopefully.

So they're going to kind of look like that.

You know what I mean?

I'll just cut a little groove in,

and this is going to be the bend up,

in theory.

no!

Let's try again.

I'm going to give that a whirl.

it's not...

Fuck!

What do I do? What do I do? What do I do?

I think I need to think of a new game plan here with this wood.

But look, this is what I'm working with.

Trying to bend this.

Look, knot, knot, knot.

Knot, knot, knot. Knot, knot, knot.

Knot, knot, knot, knot, knot, knot.

It's just so knotty.

How can I bend wood without it snapping?

If I heat it up, it'll make it softer.

I'm thinking if I heat this up on the fire, that might bend.

Try this again.

It's coming a lot better.

Come on, don't snap.

That's exactly what I wanted.

Perfect.

See, I only need to do four of these, so it's not that big of an issue.

But I just want to get it right.

You can kind of see, if you squint, the makings of a kayak.

I'm so worried about not having fish right now.

I'm running out of energy.

Running out of time.

Running out of calories.

Running out of fat.

But all you can do is just keep trying.

Don't give in.

Try and get this kayak in the water.

And if that doesn't work, I'm screwed.

You know, I can't catch fish in the middle of the lake.

I don't know.

It's amazing how hard everything becomes when you're hungry.

I can't keep going like this without a feed.

A proper feed.

You just get massive anxiety.

That's what I've got right now.

no, it's just gonna snap.

I had a big forage today, and I found a couple of mushrooms and that's it.

I'm all foraged out.

I've wasted far too much energy today.

I've got one hope and one hope only, and that is to find fish.

So much riding on this kayak, it's unbelievable.

Check out that happy little family in the middle of the lake.

Those are some fucking big birds.

If they're happy out there, maybe there's some big fish out there.

All right, let's get this boat built.

Can't dick around looking at birds all day.

It ain't no masterpiece,

but we've got ourselves a pretty sturdy boat frame here.

I'm a bit happy with that.

I think that'll get the job done.

Yeah, she's a big boat. Going to take up most of this tarp.

Shit, eh? We're at this stage.

It's going to start actually looking like a boat.

Oh, I hate cutting such expensive tarp.

it's not very easy.

Slow it down.

It is important that I try and get this boat out on the water.

I've still got a little bit of tarp left to play with, I guess.

I'm just going to do a little test on some scrap over here,

see how tight I can pull it without it ripping.

But just as importantly, make sure that this thing floats.

Jesus Christ!

Yeah, right.

That's pretty good.

Because it'd be bloody dangerous

for me to fall in the water at the moment.

If I'm out in the middle of that lake, a cold shock can put me under.

time to get sewing.

"What did you craft when you were out on Alone?"

"I made two different sorts of sewing needle."

Good old constrictor knot.

Oh, you just can't go wrong with those.

out here all alone

but then you can go home.

rightio.

Well, shit.

All right, better make a paddle.

Day 10.

It's bloody fresh down here this morning.

Yeah, it is starting to get cold.

Bit frosty again.

Have a look at the mist in the background.

I look like a gorilla in the mist.

Well, I will in about another 30 days' time.

All this hair.

Check this one over here.

come on, baby!

We got a perch.

We got a perch.

Plan today, start cutting some stuff up for the smoker.

Then we're going to go to the shelter, do a bit of work on that.

That should be looking pretty close to being done by the end of today.

And it's important, like, it's starting to drop off the temperature.

So, you know, I don't want to be doing that

when it's bloody minus 10 degrees.

Start with the perch first, eh?

I'm reasonably happy with where I'm at.

I haven't really gone without food.

I've caught a few fish, caught a lot of fish.

And then, you know, using them as bait to catch my other fish

was bloody amazing.

that's not a bad start.

I've built a smoker

and I've got at least two weeks of dried trout and fish.

She's full.

There's going to be a time where I can't fish.

Smoke in your eyes.

It's going to either be icing up

or the fish just aren't going to be biting.

It's going to be too cold.

So any fish I can get in the bank, the better.

I think I'm traveling all right at this stage.

I wonder when the predators come and try and start stealing my fish.

Smoke away, my little petal.

Let's go to the shelter.

Slowly turning this into my home.

Once I'm down out of the shelter, you know,

everything I do will be permanent.

So I can really fix it up and get it exactly how I want.

Yeah, we're moving house.

It's in a low-lying gully, which is over the river.

It's a bit of a trek down there,

but, you know, once it's done, it's done.

man, this is hard work.

Glad I've only got to do this once.

It's pretty swampy.

Look at the water in through here.

I don't want to get wet.

no.

No, no, no.

shit.

I've just walked down to where my new shelter is.

The river has risen a heap.

I thought it was just a little river.

I've got to try and get across it.

I'm going to have to build a bridge to get back over it, I reckon.

I want to stay on this ride as long as I can

and hopefully just set an example to my kids.

I'm probably not going to be the best survivalist person out here.

Like, I've fished and hunted my whole life, but I've never experienced

anything of this magnitude.

But, yeah, I'll be striving to get the job done.

Like, I didn't come here not to win.

I'm not going to be happy if I'm not close to winning.

Put the fat end over the other side this time.

If you work hard, you can achieve anything.

And that's all I want for my kids is just to have a crack.

Do not drop your sleeping bag, whatever you do.

You hear people say that they're not going to quit.

I truly believe that I won't quit in this.

And that's her.

Pretty sure she's looking all right.

Day 10.

I wonder if my wife's had the cops around there yet.

Friends and family that can't get a hold of me thinking that she's

probably knocked me off.

Come on, wind, give me a break.

Look at that.

Sitting here by the fire just trying to get warm because it's bitter.

Such a worry.

Is it going to be in for the next week?

You just don't know.

With the wind howling, today is the day to launch the kayak.

Just got to try and persevere.

It's just toned down a little bit there.

I hope that's a sign of things to come.

this is so heavy.

Can I get this on my back and just walk with it?

massive anxiety about this wind.

I can't see where I'm going.

I really can't.

Let me see.

Right.

Fuck.

I don't want to damage the kayak on the rocks.

I can feel the wind blowing.

Right. Straight going down to there.

Go, go, go, go, go.

Fuck.

can the wind just go away, please?

I want to go fishing in peace.

Hey! Jesus! No need to get feisty at me.

What a shit day for a cast.

I'm so tired.

I can barely even throw it...

..reel it, whatever you call it.

The wind is just taking it away.

my God.

It's me, this frickin' jacket.

I also feel so unbalanced.

It's all in a knot now.

The wind put it in a knot.

This is stupid.

I'm going to have to change my line.

I just want to fish!

No.

No!

That was really scary.

I never got panic attacks until I came here.

I want to push through.

I just don't know what's the line.

What's the line where I say I'm not okay?

Or this is going to hurt me in the future.

I just don't know.

Because I've never done this before and I've never felt like this before.

I don't know...

I don't know what else to do.

I'm over two weeks in and I haven't caught a fish.

I saw that!

I can cut off a little bit of bait off my foot, I reckon.

I could catch something on that.

You eat me, I eat you.

The winter, the cold winter is coming.

Welcome to Guts Ache Inn.

I'm here forever.

I've just got to learn how to eat rocks and moss and logs.

I can't get the kayak going.

This is just too dangerous.

You saw what happened to the Titanic. It sunk.

And I really don't want that to happen here.

jeez, there's a strong wind.

Here we go.

.