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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:02:25,854 --> 00:02:27,104 Hello? 2 00:02:29,232 --> 00:02:31,984 Hey, what's up? 3 00:02:34,696 --> 00:02:38,240 Five feet eleven, good looking, masculine. 4 00:02:40,243 --> 00:02:43,620 Yeah, work out, in good shape. 5 00:02:45,206 --> 00:02:49,585 Six and a half, thick, uncut. 6 00:02:49,711 --> 00:02:50,669 Fuck. 7 00:02:55,216 --> 00:02:58,260 Hello. 8 00:02:58,386 --> 00:03:01,513 Hey what's up? 9 00:03:01,639 --> 00:03:02,222 East Village. 10 00:03:02,348 --> 00:03:07,102 No, I'm more of a top. What about you? 11 00:03:07,228 --> 00:03:10,355 All right, too bad. 12 00:03:12,901 --> 00:03:18,238 Hello? Hello? 13 00:03:37,217 --> 00:03:40,636 You looking to hook up? 14 00:03:41,471 --> 00:03:45,307 Yeah, me too. Tonight. 15 00:03:45,433 --> 00:03:49,019 Yeah. I'm a top. 16 00:03:52,941 --> 00:03:55,234 You into that? 17 00:03:58,613 --> 00:04:01,573 No, I'm looking to travel. 18 00:04:03,743 --> 00:04:06,620 Where in Chelsea are you? 19 00:05:10,435 --> 00:05:12,436 Who is it? 20 00:05:12,562 --> 00:05:13,437 It's Jeff. 21 00:06:30,807 --> 00:06:33,517 I left my phone number on a piece of paper. 22 00:06:33,643 --> 00:06:36,812 Cool. Thanks for coming by. 23 00:06:36,938 --> 00:06:39,898 Thanks for having me. 24 00:06:46,531 --> 00:06:53,495 I have a girlfriend, by the way, so... 25 00:06:53,621 --> 00:06:55,914 Don't get your hopes up. 26 00:06:57,792 --> 00:07:00,168 That's too bad. 27 00:07:06,551 --> 00:07:09,511 My guest, is Erik Rothman, whose new film 28 00:07:09,637 --> 00:07:12,514 Outside of Lafayette, will have its 29 00:07:12,640 --> 00:07:15,392 world premiere at the Rotterdam Film Festival next week. 30 00:07:15,518 --> 00:07:18,979 And it will open here, at the Quad in New York on the 23rd. 31 00:07:19,105 --> 00:07:21,523 So Erik, are you working on something new now? 32 00:07:21,649 --> 00:07:24,609 I've been working on something for the last year. 33 00:07:24,735 --> 00:07:27,946 It's a film about a filmmaker and a photographer named 34 00:07:28,072 --> 00:07:33,452 Avery Willard who was a New York theater and advertising 35 00:07:33,578 --> 00:07:37,664 photographer in the 40's and 50's, but who also used 36 00:07:37,790 --> 00:07:41,793 his studio to photograph male nudes and physique spreads, 37 00:07:41,919 --> 00:07:43,420 and female impersonators. 38 00:07:43,546 --> 00:07:45,422 So how come I've never heard of this guy? 39 00:07:45,548 --> 00:07:49,384 Because no one has, really. His work is like a visual 40 00:07:49,510 --> 00:07:51,928 anthropology of gay life New York from 41 00:07:52,054 --> 00:07:55,140 the 40's 'til the 90's. 42 00:07:55,266 --> 00:07:58,185 Right now, you know I'm still in the beginning, 43 00:07:58,311 --> 00:08:01,188 I'm calling the film In Search of Avery Willard. 44 00:08:01,314 --> 00:08:07,319 And I'm just kind of in the beginning of it all, still. 45 00:09:37,410 --> 00:09:41,621 Hello? What's up? 46 00:09:41,747 --> 00:09:47,961 Five feet eleven, blonde, good looking. 47 00:09:48,087 --> 00:09:49,045 Masculine. 48 00:09:51,549 --> 00:09:52,465 You like? 49 00:09:52,592 --> 00:09:54,092 Yeah, I like. 50 00:09:54,218 --> 00:09:59,598 Good, cool. Make yourself comfortable. 51 00:09:59,724 --> 00:10:02,309 I'm going to, if that's okay. 52 00:10:04,729 --> 00:10:07,272 You don't worry about your neighbors at all? 53 00:10:07,398 --> 00:10:09,232 I like it. You don't like it? 54 00:10:09,358 --> 00:10:10,442 I like it. 55 00:10:11,902 --> 00:10:15,363 Get comfortable. Dude, come on. 56 00:10:17,617 --> 00:10:22,871 All right, that's better. I like guys like you. 57 00:10:22,997 --> 00:10:23,747 Yeah? 58 00:10:23,873 --> 00:10:25,790 I like masculine guys. 59 00:10:33,799 --> 00:10:35,717 This okay? 60 00:10:35,843 --> 00:10:41,014 Yeah. Why don't you come over here? 61 00:10:41,140 --> 00:10:44,934 Hold on, guy. Hold on. 62 00:10:45,061 --> 00:10:46,436 You like my body? 63 00:10:46,562 --> 00:10:47,729 Yeah, I do. 64 00:10:47,855 --> 00:10:50,732 I used to be a dancer, you know. 65 00:10:50,858 --> 00:10:52,651 Oh yeah? I want to touch you. 66 00:10:52,777 --> 00:10:56,529 Let's get used to each other first, if that's okay. 67 00:11:00,826 --> 00:11:03,828 My boyfriend gets off work around six, 68 00:11:03,954 --> 00:11:05,997 he'll be home by six-thirty. 69 00:11:06,123 --> 00:11:10,085 OK well, we got some time then don't we. 70 00:11:10,211 --> 00:11:11,753 What's your name? 71 00:11:11,879 --> 00:11:15,757 Russ. What's yours? 72 00:11:15,883 --> 00:11:16,633 Dave. 73 00:11:35,361 --> 00:11:37,445 He's the best poet I've read in a long time, 74 00:11:37,571 --> 00:11:38,697 you should take it home. 75 00:11:38,823 --> 00:11:42,200 Someone actually recommended it to me a long time ago but I, 76 00:11:42,326 --> 00:11:44,411 I couldn't get through it. 77 00:11:44,537 --> 00:11:45,704 Why? 78 00:11:45,830 --> 00:11:49,749 I was still with my ex-boyfriend Paolo, who was really sick. 79 00:11:49,875 --> 00:11:51,876 He was positive. 80 00:11:52,002 --> 00:11:55,547 I think it was just hard for me to read about AIDS back then. 81 00:11:55,673 --> 00:11:57,757 Is he still alive? 82 00:11:57,883 --> 00:12:02,971 Yeah - he's in London, he lives there. 83 00:12:03,097 --> 00:12:06,307 He went there to work and I broke up with him 84 00:12:06,434 --> 00:12:07,809 over the phone. 85 00:12:07,935 --> 00:12:08,852 Classy. 86 00:12:12,064 --> 00:12:14,983 In truth I think I didn't love him enough. 87 00:12:23,242 --> 00:12:28,788 Have you seen my belt, anywhere? Because I can't find my belt. 88 00:12:30,416 --> 00:12:33,585 Are you leaving? 89 00:12:33,711 --> 00:12:38,006 Yeah? No. 90 00:12:43,345 --> 00:12:50,810 I should go and... I should go. 91 00:12:50,936 --> 00:12:54,397 But I can't find my belt and I can't leave without my belt. 92 00:13:06,911 --> 00:13:11,122 So? So what's he like? 93 00:13:11,248 --> 00:13:15,794 He's like... he's just like nice. 94 00:13:15,920 --> 00:13:18,630 Nice! 95 00:13:18,756 --> 00:13:19,798 Yes, he's very nice. 96 00:13:19,924 --> 00:13:22,300 Where's he from? 97 00:13:22,426 --> 00:13:26,888 He's from the suburbs of Boston. He's a lawyer at Random House. 98 00:13:27,014 --> 00:13:28,848 You know he'd be the first American - 99 00:13:28,974 --> 00:13:29,891 American boyfriend I've ever had? 100 00:13:30,017 --> 00:13:34,187 I haven't seen you this excited about anyone in a long time, 101 00:13:34,313 --> 00:13:37,023 since Paolo. 102 00:13:37,149 --> 00:13:40,109 I was not that excited about Paolo, Claire. 103 00:13:40,236 --> 00:13:41,945 I don't know why you keep saying that all the time. 104 00:13:42,071 --> 00:13:43,363 You guys were a good couple. 105 00:13:43,489 --> 00:13:45,865 No, we were not a good couple because he bugged me. 106 00:13:45,991 --> 00:13:50,161 He was never interested in anything I had to say. 107 00:13:50,287 --> 00:13:53,414 So now, you've found a pupil? 108 00:13:53,541 --> 00:13:55,917 That's not what I'm saying. 109 00:13:56,043 --> 00:13:57,710 Paul - he is curious, he's excited. 110 00:13:57,837 --> 00:14:05,837 He's... yeah he's a nice guy. And he seems to really like me. 111 00:14:06,804 --> 00:14:09,556 I'm glad. 112 00:14:09,682 --> 00:14:11,474 I don't know. 113 00:14:18,357 --> 00:14:21,442 This is my little secret, you can't tell anyone. 114 00:14:21,569 --> 00:14:22,902 I won't. 115 00:14:23,028 --> 00:14:24,153 Do you swear? 116 00:14:24,280 --> 00:14:26,489 I swear. 117 00:14:26,615 --> 00:14:31,703 Because people in the publishing business like to gossip. 118 00:14:31,829 --> 00:14:34,831 People love to gossip in any business. 119 00:14:34,957 --> 00:14:36,833 Especially in publishing. 120 00:14:36,959 --> 00:14:38,585 Paul, I swear. 121 00:14:38,711 --> 00:14:40,111 I just don't want anyone... to know. 122 00:15:15,039 --> 00:15:17,415 Open your mouth. 123 00:15:27,676 --> 00:15:29,636 Take your shirt off. 124 00:15:57,289 --> 00:15:59,916 Had you had sex with any other men before you met me? 125 00:16:00,042 --> 00:16:06,631 A few. Not as many as you, I'm sure. 126 00:16:06,757 --> 00:16:09,300 I was a late bloomer. 127 00:16:09,426 --> 00:16:13,805 I was thirteen when I had sex with a guy for the first time. 128 00:16:13,931 --> 00:16:14,889 Yeah? 129 00:17:08,110 --> 00:17:09,944 What are you doing? 130 00:17:10,070 --> 00:17:11,112 It looks better that way. 131 00:17:11,238 --> 00:17:13,156 I don't think so. 132 00:17:17,244 --> 00:17:17,910 You're too cool. 133 00:17:18,037 --> 00:17:19,996 Oh yeah? 134 00:17:20,122 --> 00:17:21,998 Like New Yorkers don't wear their collars up? 135 00:17:22,124 --> 00:17:23,541 No. 136 00:17:23,667 --> 00:17:26,586 Same way we don't say "ciao" instead of bye. 137 00:17:27,046 --> 00:17:29,589 What's wrong with "ciao?" 138 00:17:29,715 --> 00:17:31,507 It sounds pretentious. 139 00:17:35,262 --> 00:17:38,097 I didn't say "ciao" to Markus, actually I said "tschuss." 140 00:17:38,223 --> 00:17:40,141 Same difference. 141 00:17:40,267 --> 00:17:42,185 He's German! 142 00:17:43,270 --> 00:17:45,855 It's okay. You have an accent. 143 00:17:45,981 --> 00:17:48,107 You can get away with it. I don't think I could. 144 00:17:48,233 --> 00:17:50,777 Thank you. 145 00:17:55,741 --> 00:17:57,742 It's beautiful. 146 00:17:57,868 --> 00:18:00,620 It's a picture of a woman missing the subway. 147 00:18:00,746 --> 00:18:03,790 When I first moved to New York I wanted to buy one, 148 00:18:03,916 --> 00:18:05,750 but it was like $1500. 149 00:18:05,876 --> 00:18:08,753 But I really wanted it so I asked my father if he'd, 150 00:18:08,879 --> 00:18:11,380 you know, lend me the money to get one. 151 00:18:11,507 --> 00:18:14,801 When he heard the price he thought it was ridiculous. 152 00:18:14,927 --> 00:18:18,429 Now that blonde girl is worth $5000. 153 00:18:18,555 --> 00:18:20,139 Oh my God, it's Katie. 154 00:18:20,265 --> 00:18:21,182 Who? 155 00:18:21,308 --> 00:18:22,683 Katie. 156 00:18:26,814 --> 00:18:29,015 Well maybe it's time for you to introduce your boyfriend 157 00:18:29,108 --> 00:18:30,983 to your ex girlfriend. 158 00:18:44,331 --> 00:18:48,209 And would periodically check his statistics. 159 00:18:48,335 --> 00:18:53,381 It was almost like a laptop and he enjoyed checking himself 160 00:18:53,507 --> 00:18:55,842 almost recreationally. 161 00:18:55,968 --> 00:18:57,760 There's a long line at the bathroom. 162 00:18:57,886 --> 00:19:00,054 I flirt with the good looking boy. 163 00:19:00,180 --> 00:19:04,559 Can't tell if gay or straight. Has a foreign accent. 164 00:19:04,685 --> 00:19:07,103 I tell him an idea I have for a video project. 165 00:19:09,565 --> 00:19:11,691 Coward! 166 00:19:36,842 --> 00:19:38,342 Erik... 167 00:19:42,389 --> 00:19:45,141 I think we should have a baby together. 168 00:19:54,193 --> 00:19:56,110 Where did that come from? 169 00:19:56,236 --> 00:19:58,112 I'm thirty-four. 170 00:19:58,238 --> 00:19:59,864 I know. 171 00:19:59,990 --> 00:20:01,282 I'm just saying, in a few years, if I haven't found 172 00:20:01,408 --> 00:20:04,076 the right guy... 173 00:20:05,579 --> 00:20:08,206 I don't know what Paul would think. 174 00:20:08,332 --> 00:20:11,125 I don't care what Paul would think. 175 00:20:11,251 --> 00:20:16,172 I do. I like him. 176 00:20:16,298 --> 00:20:19,967 We're talking about moving in together. 177 00:20:20,093 --> 00:20:26,599 What? I... I like him. 178 00:20:41,406 --> 00:20:43,616 Yes, is Dorothy there? 179 00:20:43,742 --> 00:20:45,368 I'll put Dorothy on the line. 180 00:20:45,494 --> 00:20:46,202 Thank you. 181 00:20:51,792 --> 00:20:52,333 Hello? 182 00:20:52,459 --> 00:20:53,334 Dorothy! 183 00:20:53,460 --> 00:20:54,919 Hi Erik, listen. We cannot tell you 184 00:20:55,045 --> 00:20:57,046 the results of your HIV test over the phone. 185 00:20:57,172 --> 00:20:59,006 It's a legal matter. 186 00:20:59,132 --> 00:21:00,758 We would be breaking state confidentiality rules. 187 00:21:00,884 --> 00:21:02,760 Are you telling me that I'm HIV positive? 188 00:21:02,886 --> 00:21:04,637 No, I'm not telling you that. 189 00:21:07,432 --> 00:21:08,266 Are you lying to me? 190 00:21:08,392 --> 00:21:12,144 What I want to know is why you're so nervous. 191 00:21:12,271 --> 00:21:14,146 Do you know you're supposed to wear condoms whenever 192 00:21:14,273 --> 00:21:15,982 you have sex, oral or anal? 193 00:21:16,108 --> 00:21:17,692 Of course, I know that. 194 00:21:17,818 --> 00:21:20,361 I'm upset because I think you're telling me I'm HIV positive. 195 00:21:20,487 --> 00:21:21,320 Wouldn't you be? 196 00:21:21,446 --> 00:21:24,699 When are you coming back to New York? 197 00:21:24,825 --> 00:21:27,785 I won't be back in New York for weeks, maybe months. 198 00:21:27,911 --> 00:21:31,372 I'm in Virginia, I'm doing interviews for a documentary. 199 00:21:31,498 --> 00:21:34,375 Just come into the office when you're back. 200 00:21:34,501 --> 00:21:36,210 Do you know my test results? 201 00:21:36,336 --> 00:21:38,587 Yes, I do. 202 00:21:38,714 --> 00:21:41,007 Well can you tell me what they are? 203 00:21:41,133 --> 00:21:43,426 Please? Please? 204 00:21:43,552 --> 00:21:44,885 Listen to me. 205 00:21:45,012 --> 00:21:47,430 What am I saying to you between the lines? 206 00:21:48,515 --> 00:21:51,309 That I'm HIV positive. 207 00:21:51,435 --> 00:21:53,728 What is the opposite of that? 208 00:21:53,854 --> 00:21:55,604 That I'm negative? 209 00:21:55,731 --> 00:21:57,231 Right. 210 00:21:57,357 --> 00:22:03,571 Oh fuck, thank you, thank you. Thank you. 211 00:22:03,697 --> 00:22:05,281 I'll come and see you when I'm back in New York. 212 00:22:05,407 --> 00:22:08,159 Skip it Erik, have a good day. 213 00:22:08,285 --> 00:22:12,288 Thank you, you too. Have a great day. 214 00:22:12,414 --> 00:22:14,874 Thank you Dorothy! Thank you. 215 00:22:28,472 --> 00:22:31,640 This is such a wonderful thing that you're doing 216 00:22:31,767 --> 00:22:32,683 for my brother. 217 00:22:32,809 --> 00:22:34,810 It's just, thank you so much. 218 00:22:34,936 --> 00:22:38,898 Well, your brother is a wonderful part of my life. 219 00:22:39,024 --> 00:22:41,442 This is nothing, it's my pleasure. 220 00:22:41,568 --> 00:22:44,153 Thank you, Luis. He's here. 221 00:22:44,279 --> 00:22:45,946 Okay. Okay! 222 00:22:46,073 --> 00:22:48,783 Everyone get in your hiding places he's coming up. 223 00:22:48,909 --> 00:22:51,160 Now! Go, go. 224 00:22:51,286 --> 00:22:53,412 Get in your places and quiet down. 225 00:23:01,671 --> 00:23:08,386 Surprise! Happy birthday! 226 00:23:09,304 --> 00:23:15,226 Oh my god, I said I never wanted a surprise party! 227 00:23:29,032 --> 00:23:30,533 Oh I hate you. 228 00:23:36,832 --> 00:23:38,833 Happy birthday. 229 00:25:10,759 --> 00:25:11,592 No! 230 00:25:11,718 --> 00:25:13,427 Maybe that's what you really want. 231 00:25:13,553 --> 00:25:14,595 No! 232 00:25:14,721 --> 00:25:16,388 Just 'cause I'm talking to some guy in the street. 233 00:25:16,515 --> 00:25:19,099 It doesn't mean I want to be single. 234 00:25:19,226 --> 00:25:20,643 It's really not fair. 235 00:25:22,229 --> 00:25:25,314 Come here. Oh, come on. 236 00:25:29,236 --> 00:25:33,989 Where are you going? I said I was sorry. 237 00:25:34,699 --> 00:25:36,909 It doesn't sound like you're sorry. 238 00:25:37,035 --> 00:25:39,537 You might say so, but you're not acting that way. 239 00:25:39,663 --> 00:25:40,746 You know what? 240 00:25:40,872 --> 00:25:42,873 I'm not the one who wants to do drugs all the time. 241 00:25:42,999 --> 00:25:44,750 Do not try to turn this around on me. 242 00:25:44,876 --> 00:25:45,501 I'm not trying to turn it around on you, 243 00:25:45,627 --> 00:25:47,461 I'm just trying to talk about your drug use. 244 00:25:47,587 --> 00:25:49,964 My drug use?! 245 00:25:50,090 --> 00:25:53,175 Why is it not okay for me to bring that up? 246 00:25:53,301 --> 00:25:55,469 Will you let me go to sleep? Please? 247 00:25:55,595 --> 00:25:57,513 I have to get up early, Erik. Some of us have jobs, you know. 248 00:25:57,639 --> 00:25:59,390 Ughhh. 249 00:25:59,516 --> 00:26:00,140 Don't do that. 250 00:26:00,267 --> 00:26:01,225 Ughhh. 251 00:26:01,351 --> 00:26:02,511 Do not make sounds like that. 252 00:26:03,853 --> 00:26:08,065 Erik! Erik! Stop it and go to bed! 253 00:26:08,191 --> 00:26:10,276 We can talk about it tomorrow. 254 00:26:11,987 --> 00:26:14,196 I can't go to sleep like this. 255 00:26:14,322 --> 00:26:15,364 Yes you can. 256 00:26:15,490 --> 00:26:17,366 No, I can't go to sleep when you're like this. 257 00:26:17,492 --> 00:26:18,534 When I'm like what? 258 00:26:18,660 --> 00:26:19,618 When you're like this. 259 00:26:19,744 --> 00:26:20,984 Well what do you want me to do? 260 00:26:20,996 --> 00:26:21,662 I want you to come to bed with me. 261 00:26:21,788 --> 00:26:22,538 Why? 262 00:26:22,664 --> 00:26:23,497 Because. 263 00:26:23,623 --> 00:26:26,458 Why can't we just sleep in different rooms? 264 00:26:26,585 --> 00:26:28,460 It's fine. It'll be good for us. 265 00:26:28,587 --> 00:26:31,589 Because I don't want to. 266 00:26:31,715 --> 00:26:33,549 You are such a baby. 267 00:26:37,804 --> 00:26:39,305 What are you doing? 268 00:26:39,431 --> 00:26:41,640 Come on, you don't need this. You don't need it! 269 00:26:41,766 --> 00:26:42,725 Erik! 270 00:26:42,851 --> 00:26:44,560 No, you're gonna come sleep with me in the bed. 271 00:26:44,686 --> 00:26:44,852 No I'm not. 272 00:26:44,978 --> 00:26:46,729 Now! Yes you are. 273 00:26:46,855 --> 00:26:47,688 No I am not. 274 00:26:47,814 --> 00:26:49,694 Yes you are gonna come sleep with me in the bed! 275 00:26:58,325 --> 00:26:59,199 Stop it! 276 00:27:04,623 --> 00:27:07,499 Why don't you just call that boy from the street 277 00:27:07,626 --> 00:27:09,835 and have him save you? 278 00:27:09,961 --> 00:27:11,920 He didn't give me his number. 279 00:27:12,047 --> 00:27:14,006 I hate you so much! 280 00:27:19,054 --> 00:27:21,096 I met Avery Willard through Jack Smith - 281 00:27:21,222 --> 00:27:23,891 if Jack Smith was doing some sort of ridiculous filming 282 00:27:24,017 --> 00:27:25,643 he would be there, and then he would tell you about it, 283 00:27:25,769 --> 00:27:28,354 and he'd say, "Oh, you're a filmmaker, 284 00:27:28,480 --> 00:27:29,730 you've got to meet this one." 285 00:27:29,856 --> 00:27:33,150 He was always putting together these underground 286 00:27:33,276 --> 00:27:35,653 kind of like talents, you know. 287 00:27:35,779 --> 00:27:37,946 I don't know what you call that kind of group of 288 00:27:38,073 --> 00:27:41,950 people because we weren't the Spielbergs of the time. 289 00:27:42,077 --> 00:27:44,328 And I don't even know if there is anything like - 290 00:27:44,454 --> 00:27:46,872 oh yes, there is - that stuff that's on the Internet now, 291 00:27:46,998 --> 00:27:49,917 is exactly what Avery Willard was and we all were. 292 00:27:50,043 --> 00:27:52,670 We weren't making great stuff, you know it's - 293 00:27:52,796 --> 00:27:55,297 but we were filming things that no one else would film, 294 00:27:55,423 --> 00:27:56,965 maybe that's what it was all about. 295 00:27:57,092 --> 00:27:58,467 Do you think he had talent - 296 00:27:59,594 --> 00:28:00,761 Avery Willard. Do you think he had talent? 297 00:28:00,887 --> 00:28:03,055 No, I don't think he had talent one. 298 00:28:04,224 --> 00:28:05,984 I think that's why he was angry all the time. 299 00:28:08,144 --> 00:28:10,562 Because he not only was not very attractive - 300 00:28:10,689 --> 00:28:14,733 actually I think his outsides were - 301 00:28:14,859 --> 00:28:16,985 because of what he was inside. 302 00:28:17,112 --> 00:28:19,446 You know, that happens to people, you know. 303 00:28:19,572 --> 00:28:20,656 I mean, check out Nixon. 304 00:28:20,782 --> 00:28:24,493 You know, that face goes with who's inside. 305 00:28:24,619 --> 00:28:27,121 And that's very - I really believe you can tell who 306 00:28:27,247 --> 00:28:29,289 people are - what they're somewhat about - 307 00:28:29,416 --> 00:28:30,541 by their appearance. 308 00:28:30,667 --> 00:28:33,127 You, for instance, have a wonderful open, 309 00:28:33,253 --> 00:28:35,212 and welcoming kind of thing about you. 310 00:28:50,770 --> 00:28:53,063 Hi it's Paul, leave me a message. 311 00:28:59,946 --> 00:29:01,697 So, guess who we ran into yesterday? 312 00:29:01,823 --> 00:29:03,490 Who? 313 00:29:03,616 --> 00:29:05,534 Your ex-boyfriend. 314 00:29:05,660 --> 00:29:07,828 Erik, if you saw Paolo now, you wouldn't believe it. 315 00:29:07,954 --> 00:29:11,749 He's working out and everything. He looks great. 316 00:29:11,875 --> 00:29:13,751 If you're gonna start with that again 317 00:29:13,877 --> 00:29:15,461 I'm gonna get very angry with you. 318 00:29:15,587 --> 00:29:17,188 I'm gonna call him and see if he wants to 319 00:29:17,255 --> 00:29:18,215 come to the gym with me. 320 00:29:18,339 --> 00:29:20,739 Don't worry he doesn't want you anyway, he's got a boyfriend, 321 00:29:20,759 --> 00:29:22,239 and they're moving together to Brazil. 322 00:29:23,762 --> 00:29:26,138 Is that true? 323 00:29:26,848 --> 00:29:28,265 What? That he has a boyfriend? 324 00:29:28,391 --> 00:29:30,350 That he's moving to Brazil. 325 00:29:30,477 --> 00:29:33,353 That's what he told me. 326 00:29:33,480 --> 00:29:35,898 Well that's just incredible, I mean he was, 327 00:29:36,024 --> 00:29:38,525 he always had this fantasy that he was gonna 328 00:29:38,651 --> 00:29:41,945 live on some island in the north of Brazil. 329 00:29:42,071 --> 00:29:43,697 I guess it's not a fantasy anymore. 330 00:29:43,823 --> 00:29:47,826 Where the hell is Paul? 331 00:29:47,952 --> 00:29:50,788 Yeah, where is he? 332 00:29:50,914 --> 00:29:53,499 He went to get some cash. 333 00:29:53,625 --> 00:29:55,209 I know, but it's been twenty minutes. 334 00:29:55,335 --> 00:29:57,669 More, it's like thirty minutes. 335 00:29:57,796 --> 00:30:01,048 I got this. 336 00:30:01,174 --> 00:30:01,840 Thank you, Dan. 337 00:30:01,966 --> 00:30:03,926 Are you sure? 338 00:30:04,052 --> 00:30:05,803 Yes, I'm sure. 339 00:30:05,929 --> 00:30:08,305 Thank you. 340 00:30:08,431 --> 00:30:11,433 Just run to the bathroom and I'll be right back. 341 00:30:20,652 --> 00:30:22,653 I just got a call from Paul. 342 00:30:22,779 --> 00:30:24,340 What happened? Was it something we said? 343 00:30:24,364 --> 00:30:25,280 No! 344 00:30:25,406 --> 00:30:28,867 No, I think it was the mix of wine with vodka, 345 00:30:28,993 --> 00:30:29,873 he's not feeling well. 346 00:30:29,953 --> 00:30:32,287 He went home. 347 00:30:32,413 --> 00:30:35,541 He sends his apologies but he's in bed. 348 00:30:35,667 --> 00:30:39,002 Okay, well - we're gonna go. 349 00:30:39,128 --> 00:30:40,629 Which way you headed? 350 00:30:40,755 --> 00:30:41,839 I think I'm, I'm just gonna walk. 351 00:30:41,965 --> 00:30:45,509 I'll take a cab with you guys. 352 00:30:45,635 --> 00:30:45,926 Bye. 353 00:30:46,052 --> 00:30:47,636 You alright? 354 00:30:47,762 --> 00:30:48,762 Yeah. 355 00:30:48,888 --> 00:30:49,721 Well, always good to see you man. 356 00:30:49,848 --> 00:30:53,225 You too man, good night! 357 00:30:57,021 --> 00:30:58,981 - Bye! - Bye! 358 00:31:17,750 --> 00:31:18,709 Paul. 359 00:31:18,835 --> 00:31:20,335 Hello. 360 00:31:24,090 --> 00:31:29,052 It's Monday morning. Where have you been? 361 00:31:29,178 --> 00:31:32,514 Not now. I don't want to be late. 362 00:32:03,880 --> 00:32:05,714 Paul? 363 00:32:20,063 --> 00:32:24,232 They were very important for the gay community and 364 00:32:24,359 --> 00:32:25,943 he was an institution. 365 00:32:26,069 --> 00:32:28,153 And everybody walked out on him. 366 00:32:28,279 --> 00:32:30,989 It all just slowly fell apart. 367 00:32:36,120 --> 00:32:38,747 Avery was so bizarre, I thought. 368 00:32:38,873 --> 00:32:41,124 And also, I saw so many things in Avery 369 00:32:41,250 --> 00:32:43,377 I didn't like about myself. 370 00:33:46,524 --> 00:33:47,190 Hello? 371 00:33:49,652 --> 00:33:54,948 Hey what's up? East Village, you? 372 00:33:55,074 --> 00:33:58,160 It's eight-and-a-half inch. 373 00:33:58,286 --> 00:34:02,748 Hard as a rock, I got a beautiful cock. 374 00:34:02,874 --> 00:34:04,207 Yeah you like that? 375 00:34:07,211 --> 00:34:09,087 No, no, I can't host. 376 00:34:09,213 --> 00:34:14,801 I'm married. Yeah. No, my wife's not home. 377 00:34:14,927 --> 00:34:16,762 She's gonna come back home later. 378 00:34:16,888 --> 00:34:19,890 What I wanna do, I just fuck your mouth 379 00:34:20,016 --> 00:34:22,017 like I fuck her pussy. 380 00:34:22,143 --> 00:34:25,979 You little bitch, come here I want to fuck you. 381 00:34:30,943 --> 00:34:32,069 Hello? 382 00:34:33,863 --> 00:34:35,989 Hello? Hey what's up? 383 00:34:36,115 --> 00:34:44,115 East Village. You? Yeah, I'm a dominant top. 384 00:34:45,166 --> 00:34:47,918 What are you into? 385 00:34:49,837 --> 00:34:51,254 Where you from? 386 00:34:55,885 --> 00:34:59,930 Paul? Is that you? 387 00:35:00,348 --> 00:35:01,723 Paul? 388 00:35:42,098 --> 00:35:44,015 Hi this is Paul, leave me a message. 389 00:35:44,142 --> 00:35:48,687 Paul this is killing me, it's killing me, it's killing me! 390 00:36:08,249 --> 00:36:11,543 What I want to know is what you were doing on a phone sex line 391 00:36:11,669 --> 00:36:12,919 when you were supposed to be editing! 392 00:36:13,045 --> 00:36:14,754 You were gone for two days. I could not find you. 393 00:36:14,881 --> 00:36:16,423 So you were looking for me? Is that what you were doing? 394 00:36:16,549 --> 00:36:17,591 Of course not. 395 00:36:17,717 --> 00:36:20,237 Erik, I don't spy on you, and I will not stand being spied upon. 396 00:36:20,344 --> 00:36:22,262 If every time you go away we have to go through this, 397 00:36:22,388 --> 00:36:24,723 then I don't want to be in this relationship anymore. 398 00:36:24,849 --> 00:36:26,057 I have no idea where you are, 399 00:36:26,184 --> 00:36:27,517 I have no idea what you're doing. 400 00:36:27,643 --> 00:36:29,186 Why are you focusing on me? 401 00:36:29,312 --> 00:36:32,147 You've been working on this goddamn movie for four years. 402 00:36:32,273 --> 00:36:34,193 You get a chance to go away to an artist's colony 403 00:36:34,233 --> 00:36:36,276 where they bring you your lunch in a fucking picnic basket, 404 00:36:36,402 --> 00:36:38,322 and you spend the whole time on a phone sex line. 405 00:36:38,362 --> 00:36:40,155 I did not spend the whole time on a phone sex line! 406 00:36:40,281 --> 00:36:41,362 I don't have time for this! 407 00:36:41,407 --> 00:36:43,283 I have a job, do you understand what that is? 408 00:36:43,409 --> 00:36:45,952 I was at my desk, at work, early, on Monday. 409 00:36:46,078 --> 00:36:47,829 I do my job. I have my clients. 410 00:36:47,955 --> 00:36:49,080 Do you know what my work load is? 411 00:36:49,207 --> 00:36:50,248 Do you have any idea? 412 00:36:50,374 --> 00:36:51,333 Stop! Stop it! 413 00:37:13,356 --> 00:37:17,359 What? Oh, sorry, sorry. 414 00:38:25,845 --> 00:38:27,512 Have you seen this? 415 00:38:27,638 --> 00:38:29,014 Seen what? 416 00:38:29,140 --> 00:38:35,687 The floor is buckling over here. It's pretty bad over here too. 417 00:38:35,813 --> 00:38:38,106 Was it always like that? 418 00:38:41,110 --> 00:38:43,550 You should ask Mario if he can find someone to fix it for you. 419 00:38:47,366 --> 00:38:49,367 You know, you have to tell me what you do when 420 00:38:49,493 --> 00:38:50,410 you're out all night and I can't find you. 421 00:38:50,536 --> 00:38:52,329 Don't start with that. 422 00:39:00,296 --> 00:39:01,629 Erik? 423 00:39:03,924 --> 00:39:08,928 Erik? What are you doing? Erik stop it! Stop it. 424 00:39:28,866 --> 00:39:34,454 There were certain young men who were sort of on the scene, 425 00:39:34,580 --> 00:39:36,414 and hanging out on the streets and so forth, 426 00:39:36,540 --> 00:39:38,416 that Avery had seen me with and... 427 00:39:40,961 --> 00:39:42,879 Why is it so gray? 428 00:39:44,590 --> 00:39:46,466 Can you stop. 429 00:39:46,592 --> 00:39:47,425 We'll fix it later, Erik. 430 00:39:47,551 --> 00:39:50,595 We really shouldn't stop now, we're already behind. 431 00:39:50,721 --> 00:39:52,931 If we aren't going to do it now, why am I here? 432 00:39:53,057 --> 00:39:54,808 Can we just watch it going forward and 433 00:39:54,934 --> 00:39:56,434 we'll fix that bit later. 434 00:39:58,646 --> 00:39:59,270 OK, fine. 435 00:39:59,397 --> 00:40:01,398 John, thank you. 436 00:40:15,871 --> 00:40:19,082 Paul, Paul. 437 00:40:31,929 --> 00:40:33,388 Alright, Paul. 438 00:40:33,514 --> 00:40:40,311 I love you, very much, and you are my best friend. 439 00:40:40,438 --> 00:40:44,983 I admire you, and I think you're brilliant. 440 00:40:45,109 --> 00:40:50,196 You are sweet and kind and very loving. 441 00:40:53,784 --> 00:40:56,494 Since we first started going out, 442 00:40:56,620 --> 00:41:01,875 alcohol and drug use have been a problem in our relationship. 443 00:41:02,001 --> 00:41:04,878 I have never felt certain that you would come home any night 444 00:41:05,004 --> 00:41:06,921 that we've not been together for an evening, 445 00:41:07,047 --> 00:41:09,466 that's for over five years. 446 00:41:09,592 --> 00:41:12,719 Every New Year's you made a resolution to stop. 447 00:41:12,845 --> 00:41:14,929 But it never happens, Paul. 448 00:41:15,055 --> 00:41:19,142 After all of this, you are still my favorite person in the world. 449 00:41:19,268 --> 00:41:21,394 I want to spend the rest of my life with you and 450 00:41:21,520 --> 00:41:24,314 I want our relationship to make me feel stronger. 451 00:41:29,862 --> 00:41:32,614 I can't take care of you because you have proven 452 00:41:32,740 --> 00:41:37,327 to be helpless and unmanageable. 453 00:41:37,453 --> 00:41:41,539 I've worried about you every hour of every day. 454 00:41:41,665 --> 00:41:43,458 I can't live like this. 455 00:41:47,254 --> 00:41:49,339 If you don't get on a plane and follow through 456 00:41:49,465 --> 00:41:51,508 with the recommendations, 457 00:41:51,634 --> 00:41:56,179 our relationship is over and you need to move out. 458 00:42:04,730 --> 00:42:06,606 Are you finished? 459 00:42:12,613 --> 00:42:14,531 You all finished? 460 00:42:23,624 --> 00:42:25,959 Jill is ready. 461 00:42:26,085 --> 00:42:27,627 Thanks. 462 00:42:32,550 --> 00:42:35,343 These are the files that I found at home. 463 00:42:37,888 --> 00:42:42,183 Thanks. Oh this is it. 464 00:42:42,309 --> 00:42:46,854 Paul also had some messages. Peggy Simon... 465 00:42:46,981 --> 00:42:48,606 All right, let me get this down. 466 00:42:48,732 --> 00:42:53,611 So, Peggy Simon, Lucius Ambrosino, 467 00:42:53,737 --> 00:42:56,990 and Gene Reid-Pharr. 468 00:42:57,116 --> 00:42:58,700 So I'm just telling everybody that 469 00:42:58,826 --> 00:43:00,827 Paul's taking some time off. 470 00:43:01,829 --> 00:43:04,455 If they ask, I tell his writers it's stress 471 00:43:04,582 --> 00:43:06,457 and he's taking care of himself. 472 00:43:06,584 --> 00:43:08,543 Thanks Jill. 473 00:43:08,669 --> 00:43:14,090 I feel terrible that your life has been so impinged by this. 474 00:43:14,216 --> 00:43:15,466 It's okay. 475 00:43:17,219 --> 00:43:19,262 Oh, here. 476 00:43:19,388 --> 00:43:21,264 This is Paul's mail. 477 00:43:21,390 --> 00:43:23,224 I went through most of it already. 478 00:43:23,350 --> 00:43:26,144 I think there's a check in there, somewhere. 479 00:43:31,609 --> 00:43:33,151 He called last night. 480 00:43:33,277 --> 00:43:34,986 And? 481 00:43:36,614 --> 00:43:42,493 He... he said that I ruined his life, 482 00:43:42,620 --> 00:43:44,746 and that he wasn't going to stay. 483 00:43:47,916 --> 00:43:52,045 Well, I think they all say that in rehab, Erik. 484 00:43:56,592 --> 00:43:58,551 I hope so. 485 00:44:02,723 --> 00:44:05,516 Dear friends, I wanted to write you, 486 00:44:05,643 --> 00:44:09,437 and tell you that I'm back from Minnesota, 487 00:44:09,563 --> 00:44:13,399 and that I can report that Paul is doing very, very well. 488 00:44:13,525 --> 00:44:14,984 He looks great. 489 00:44:15,110 --> 00:44:17,612 He has certainly taken to the program, to the steps. 490 00:44:17,738 --> 00:44:22,575 I'm proud of him for taking rehab so seriously. 491 00:44:22,701 --> 00:44:28,122 So he is coming back soon, and the next phase will begin. 492 00:44:28,248 --> 00:44:30,667 I'm nervous, I'll admit. 493 00:44:30,793 --> 00:44:32,752 And I know now that I need to separate myself from his 494 00:44:32,878 --> 00:44:36,255 recovery as best as I can. 495 00:44:36,382 --> 00:44:39,550 So I will rely on each one of you to remind me. 496 00:44:39,677 --> 00:44:42,136 That's all for now. 497 00:44:42,262 --> 00:44:43,638 Lots of love, Erik. 498 00:45:16,422 --> 00:45:17,714 I'm lgor. 499 00:45:20,676 --> 00:45:23,678 I'm Erik. Hello, lgor. 500 00:45:30,894 --> 00:45:32,687 No, not here. 501 00:45:32,813 --> 00:45:33,646 Yes. 502 00:45:33,772 --> 00:45:34,647 Let's go some place. 503 00:45:34,773 --> 00:45:37,024 No, I don't want to. 504 00:45:38,861 --> 00:45:41,112 We can go to my place, but I live in Brooklyn. 505 00:45:46,744 --> 00:45:49,704 Shit, is he okay? 506 00:45:49,830 --> 00:45:52,165 Did you guys do "G?" 507 00:45:58,046 --> 00:45:58,838 Take this. 508 00:46:05,137 --> 00:46:07,346 God it's gross down here. 509 00:46:10,434 --> 00:46:12,560 Thank you. 510 00:46:12,686 --> 00:46:15,062 I guess it would be completely inappropriate to invite you 511 00:46:15,189 --> 00:46:16,981 to my house now wouldn't it? 512 00:46:17,107 --> 00:46:19,025 I think so. 513 00:46:21,612 --> 00:46:22,693 Because I have a boyfriend? 514 00:46:22,780 --> 00:46:27,617 No, I... I remembered I have a class in the morning. 515 00:46:29,578 --> 00:46:30,787 What do you study? 516 00:46:30,913 --> 00:46:31,829 It's a drawing class. 517 00:46:31,955 --> 00:46:34,499 You're an artist? 518 00:46:34,625 --> 00:46:36,793 I paint so I guess I'm an artist. 519 00:46:39,004 --> 00:46:40,797 I bet you're very good at what you're doing. 520 00:46:43,300 --> 00:46:44,258 And you? 521 00:46:44,384 --> 00:46:46,219 What do you do? 522 00:46:46,345 --> 00:46:48,513 I make documentary films. 523 00:46:48,639 --> 00:46:49,722 Nice. 524 00:46:49,848 --> 00:46:55,728 Are you sure you don't want to come over? 525 00:46:55,854 --> 00:46:57,522 Just for a little bit. 526 00:46:57,648 --> 00:46:59,232 Yes. 527 00:46:59,358 --> 00:47:00,858 No, I'm, I'm sure. 528 00:47:00,984 --> 00:47:02,860 But my subway is this way. 529 00:47:02,986 --> 00:47:04,779 I can walk with you a little more. 530 00:47:04,905 --> 00:47:07,782 Igor. 531 00:47:09,576 --> 00:47:11,494 Where in Russia are you from? 532 00:47:11,620 --> 00:47:13,955 I'm from Ecuador actually. 533 00:47:14,081 --> 00:47:16,624 My father was a hard core Marxist and 534 00:47:16,750 --> 00:47:19,585 he named all of his kids after Russian names. 535 00:47:19,711 --> 00:47:22,004 My sisters are Tatiana and Tamara. 536 00:47:22,130 --> 00:47:24,841 And lgor ended up living in New York City. 537 00:47:24,967 --> 00:47:27,802 In Coney Island, of all places, surrounded by Russians. 538 00:48:10,762 --> 00:48:13,598 Oh my god. Are you okay? 539 00:48:17,477 --> 00:48:20,146 It's wonderful! 540 00:48:29,323 --> 00:48:31,282 You're coming in, right? 541 00:48:31,408 --> 00:48:33,868 Oh yeah. I come later. 542 00:48:41,793 --> 00:48:43,252 Are you coming in? 543 00:48:43,378 --> 00:48:46,255 I'll join you in a second. 544 00:48:50,010 --> 00:48:51,969 When are you two getting pregnant? 545 00:48:52,095 --> 00:48:53,721 We aren't. 546 00:48:53,847 --> 00:48:55,431 Why not? 547 00:48:56,808 --> 00:48:59,518 He already has two kids, and he doesn't really want 548 00:48:59,645 --> 00:49:01,479 to have another one. 549 00:49:02,564 --> 00:49:04,607 I'm sorry, sweetheart. 550 00:49:05,067 --> 00:49:07,818 Yeah, me too. 551 00:49:07,945 --> 00:49:13,824 He's not perfect but, I do like him. 552 00:49:20,958 --> 00:49:23,876 I wish I could trust you more. 553 00:49:25,545 --> 00:49:26,671 Excuse me? 554 00:49:26,797 --> 00:49:29,465 It really upsets me that I had to learn about how bad things 555 00:49:29,591 --> 00:49:32,134 were between you and Paul only at the end. 556 00:49:32,260 --> 00:49:35,054 I'm mad at you for not telling me. 557 00:49:35,180 --> 00:49:36,931 I've been hiding crucial events in my life 558 00:49:37,057 --> 00:49:40,893 since I was thirteen years old. 559 00:49:41,019 --> 00:49:45,314 That's no excuse. You need to change things. 560 00:49:45,440 --> 00:49:46,691 Get better therapy. 561 00:49:46,817 --> 00:49:49,902 I'm trying. I'm telling you now. 562 00:49:50,028 --> 00:49:51,946 Well, I appreciate it. 563 00:49:52,072 --> 00:49:53,948 But I still don't forgive you for keeping me 564 00:49:54,074 --> 00:49:56,617 in the dark for so long, ok? 565 00:49:56,743 --> 00:49:58,536 I need you to be braver than that. 566 00:49:58,662 --> 00:50:01,080 If I'm gonna be the father of your child? 567 00:50:01,206 --> 00:50:02,081 Yes. 568 00:50:02,207 --> 00:50:05,501 If you're gonna be the father of my child. 569 00:50:51,506 --> 00:50:53,174 I just want to say... 570 00:50:54,551 --> 00:50:58,220 Claire! Alassane! 571 00:50:58,346 --> 00:51:01,057 Jesus Christ, those two. Get a room! 572 00:51:01,183 --> 00:51:03,017 I want to say thank you for coming! 573 00:51:03,143 --> 00:51:08,189 I want to say thank you for coming, both of you. 574 00:51:08,315 --> 00:51:10,691 Thank you for driving during the snow storm, 575 00:51:10,817 --> 00:51:14,612 and Thomas, Vivian, Luca - thank you very much. 576 00:51:14,738 --> 00:51:16,655 Thank you very much for ditching your mom's 577 00:51:16,782 --> 00:51:17,948 fabulous cousin's party. 578 00:51:18,075 --> 00:51:20,076 Thank you for giving us a reason. 579 00:51:20,202 --> 00:51:24,705 Dan, thank you so much for agreeing to sleep on the couch. 580 00:51:24,831 --> 00:51:25,956 Oh, really? 581 00:51:26,833 --> 00:51:28,113 Alright, I'll sleep on the couch. 582 00:51:28,168 --> 00:51:32,505 No really, seriously, I really want to 583 00:51:32,631 --> 00:51:34,590 I really want to thank you all for being here. 584 00:51:34,716 --> 00:51:36,634 It means a lot to me, that you're here, 585 00:51:36,760 --> 00:51:38,719 and we're spending the holiday together. 586 00:51:39,221 --> 00:51:40,179 It means so much. 587 00:51:40,305 --> 00:51:46,644 And I'm especially happy to have Paul here with us. 588 00:51:46,770 --> 00:51:48,521 Looking so gorgeous... 589 00:51:53,693 --> 00:51:55,903 Why thank you, Luca. 590 00:51:58,698 --> 00:52:05,746 It has not been an easy few months, Paul, but 591 00:52:07,791 --> 00:52:09,500 Erik... 592 00:52:09,626 --> 00:52:17,216 I think you are a wonder, and your energy and your positivity, 593 00:52:17,342 --> 00:52:23,180 and the way you're bravely changing your life - 594 00:52:23,306 --> 00:52:27,893 it's just amazing to watch. 595 00:52:28,019 --> 00:52:31,981 And to be part of. 596 00:52:32,107 --> 00:52:34,233 You inspire me and I love you. 597 00:52:34,359 --> 00:52:36,026 Thank you. 598 00:52:36,153 --> 00:52:38,988 Merry Christmas. 599 00:52:39,114 --> 00:52:41,699 All right, cheers everyone. That's it. 600 00:53:01,720 --> 00:53:06,599 What is that? 601 00:53:08,685 --> 00:53:11,437 I wonder who put that there. 602 00:53:32,500 --> 00:53:35,127 Oh no, you didn't. 603 00:53:40,258 --> 00:53:42,635 Merry Christmas. 604 00:53:46,431 --> 00:53:47,223 Thank you. 605 00:53:47,349 --> 00:53:53,854 For your love. And your patience. 606 00:53:53,980 --> 00:53:56,398 And thank you for putting up with me. 607 00:54:05,700 --> 00:54:07,326 It's amazing. 608 00:54:07,452 --> 00:54:08,494 Do you like it? 609 00:54:08,620 --> 00:54:12,289 Nah, I love it. 610 00:55:03,383 --> 00:55:06,969 Paul? Paul pick up the phone. 611 00:55:07,095 --> 00:55:10,806 We just won a Teddy Award - best documentary. 612 00:55:12,475 --> 00:55:16,145 Paul are you there? 613 00:55:18,523 --> 00:55:21,942 OK, call me back as soon as you get this. 614 00:55:22,068 --> 00:55:23,610 I love you. 615 00:56:02,567 --> 00:56:06,362 Paul? Paul pick up the phone. 616 00:56:06,488 --> 00:56:09,365 We just won a Teddy Award - best documentary. 617 00:56:11,993 --> 00:56:14,411 Paul are you there? 618 00:56:16,456 --> 00:56:20,542 OK, call me back as soon as you get this. 619 00:56:20,668 --> 00:56:22,336 I love you. 620 00:56:24,214 --> 00:56:25,374 Hi Paul. I wanna talk to you! 621 00:56:25,465 --> 00:56:29,009 I've been trying you for days, I'm starting to get worried. 622 00:56:29,135 --> 00:56:31,720 Call me back when you get this, hope all is well, it's Vivian. 623 00:56:31,846 --> 00:56:33,764 OK, bye. 624 00:56:33,890 --> 00:56:36,392 Erik? This is Jill. 625 00:56:36,518 --> 00:56:40,813 Paul has not showed up in the office all week 626 00:56:40,939 --> 00:56:42,606 and he's not returning my calls. 627 00:56:42,732 --> 00:56:44,483 I need to know what's going on. 628 00:56:44,609 --> 00:56:48,821 So please call me - 212-249-3576. 629 00:56:48,947 --> 00:56:49,571 Thanks. 630 00:56:54,202 --> 00:56:55,828 Why don't you try calling the police? 631 00:56:55,954 --> 00:56:57,496 Oh the police can't do anything. 632 00:56:57,622 --> 00:56:59,423 There are only two ways Paul is going to stop. 633 00:56:59,541 --> 00:57:01,750 He's going to run out of money, or he's going to die. 634 00:57:01,876 --> 00:57:04,044 Hey, don't say that. 635 00:57:04,170 --> 00:57:06,130 Why do you think it's your job to save him? 636 00:57:06,256 --> 00:57:08,132 Dan! Stop it. 637 00:57:08,258 --> 00:57:10,843 We don't need your Twelve Step bullshit right now, okay? 638 00:57:10,969 --> 00:57:12,889 If your boyfriend was on a three week drug binge, 639 00:57:12,971 --> 00:57:14,532 don't tell me you wouldn't do everything 640 00:57:14,597 --> 00:57:15,514 you could to find him. 641 00:57:15,640 --> 00:57:16,348 - Right? - No, I wouldn't. 642 00:57:16,474 --> 00:57:17,307 Please. 643 00:57:17,434 --> 00:57:18,392 I'm thinking of hiring a private detective. 644 00:57:18,518 --> 00:57:21,311 I'm sorry - I can't sign up for this. 645 00:57:21,438 --> 00:57:23,522 Call me when you guys get sane. 646 00:57:23,648 --> 00:57:26,024 Erik, I love you. I'm here for you. 647 00:57:26,151 --> 00:57:28,360 But I can't support this ridiculous type of behavior. 648 00:57:28,486 --> 00:57:31,155 It didn't work the first time and it's not going to work now. 649 00:57:31,281 --> 00:57:31,447 Sorry, I'm late. 650 00:57:31,573 --> 00:57:34,074 Paul's a grown up. 651 00:57:34,200 --> 00:57:35,534 He's going to work it out, or he's not. 652 00:57:35,660 --> 00:57:36,994 But you're not going to save him. 653 00:57:37,120 --> 00:57:39,204 You never were, and you aren't now. 654 00:57:39,330 --> 00:57:40,998 What's going on? 655 00:57:41,124 --> 00:57:42,666 Very helpful, Dan. 656 00:59:56,175 --> 01:00:00,262 Hi. Where are you? 657 01:00:02,724 --> 01:00:06,226 Don't - don't go anywhere. Stay where you are. 658 01:00:15,737 --> 01:00:17,404 I love you. 659 01:00:24,912 --> 01:00:25,787 Let's go home. 660 01:00:25,913 --> 01:00:27,748 Don't start, Erik. 661 01:00:32,378 --> 01:00:38,050 Can you believe this place? Isn't it incredible? 662 01:00:38,176 --> 01:00:40,886 It's a hotel room, Paul. 663 01:00:41,012 --> 01:00:44,348 Don't be mean or I'm not going to let you stay here. 664 01:00:50,021 --> 01:00:51,772 Oh please don't do that. 665 01:00:56,027 --> 01:00:57,527 Must've been expensive. 666 01:00:57,654 --> 01:00:59,655 I got lucky. 667 01:01:02,116 --> 01:01:04,493 There's a middle of the week deal. 668 01:01:04,619 --> 01:01:06,745 Fashion week is over and everyone went back to Milan. 669 01:01:06,871 --> 01:01:09,790 There's also this art thing in London. 670 01:01:09,916 --> 01:01:12,209 What are you talking about? 671 01:01:12,335 --> 01:01:16,588 Froze? No, Frieze? The art thing? 672 01:01:16,714 --> 01:01:17,714 Do you want a drink? 673 01:01:24,514 --> 01:01:27,599 Shit, I'm all out of ice. Do you mind getting us some ice? 674 01:01:27,725 --> 01:01:32,187 We got lots of ice at home. Come on. 675 01:01:32,313 --> 01:01:34,940 What did I tell you? 676 01:01:35,066 --> 01:01:39,236 Come see the bedroom. I'll show you. 677 01:01:39,362 --> 01:01:43,323 Try the bed. Oh, it's amazing. 678 01:01:43,449 --> 01:01:45,033 I love this bed. 679 01:01:48,496 --> 01:01:49,871 Paul... 680 01:02:06,055 --> 01:02:08,765 I'm sorry I ruined your premiere in Berlin. 681 01:02:12,687 --> 01:02:14,855 I was really proud of you. 682 01:02:18,735 --> 01:02:21,820 Come on, come on, let's go home. Let's go home. 683 01:02:25,742 --> 01:02:27,743 Please don't hate me. 684 01:02:39,130 --> 01:02:45,302 Do you think I've lost weight? I know I lost a little. 685 01:02:50,099 --> 01:02:53,602 It's the crackhead diet. I don't recommend it. 686 01:02:53,728 --> 01:02:55,479 Let's go home. 687 01:02:58,691 --> 01:03:01,485 I'll come home tomorrow. You should leave now. 688 01:03:02,445 --> 01:03:04,362 I'm not leaving. 689 01:03:06,157 --> 01:03:08,241 You don't want to watch this. 690 01:03:09,327 --> 01:03:10,702 I'm fine. 691 01:03:14,123 --> 01:03:15,207 Erik, you should go. 692 01:03:15,333 --> 01:03:16,792 I said I'm fine. 693 01:03:20,254 --> 01:03:24,633 You're no worse than anybody else. 694 01:03:24,759 --> 01:03:27,010 I'm sure that there's someone down the hall 695 01:03:27,136 --> 01:03:29,721 doing exactly the same thing. 696 01:03:29,847 --> 01:03:31,598 Really? 697 01:03:31,724 --> 01:03:32,808 Yeah. 698 01:03:57,750 --> 01:04:00,001 Paul, I know that you're ready. 699 01:04:00,127 --> 01:04:02,045 You're ready for this to be over. 700 01:04:02,880 --> 01:04:03,922 How do you know that? 701 01:04:04,048 --> 01:04:10,846 Because I know you, Paul. I know you. 702 01:04:10,972 --> 01:04:15,267 I'll come home tomorrow, but you should go now. 703 01:04:15,393 --> 01:04:20,397 You're gonna come home tomorrow, and you're going to go to rehab. 704 01:04:20,523 --> 01:04:21,648 I said I'm coming home tomorrow. 705 01:04:21,774 --> 01:04:22,732 I did not say I'm going to rehab. 706 01:04:22,859 --> 01:04:25,861 Do you promise? 707 01:04:25,987 --> 01:04:27,320 Promise. 708 01:04:28,906 --> 01:04:32,576 Who is that? 709 01:04:32,702 --> 01:04:37,038 It's your choice. That's all you're gonna get. 710 01:04:37,164 --> 01:04:38,665 I think you should just leave. 711 01:04:38,791 --> 01:04:39,875 Paul! 712 01:04:52,763 --> 01:04:54,472 You want anything? 713 01:04:56,475 --> 01:04:58,351 Yeah I'll have a beer. 714 01:04:58,477 --> 01:04:58,977 OK. 715 01:05:21,792 --> 01:05:22,584 You ok? 716 01:05:22,710 --> 01:05:24,127 I'm fine. 717 01:06:16,847 --> 01:06:19,766 Erik? Erik? 718 01:06:19,892 --> 01:06:21,059 What? 719 01:07:27,918 --> 01:07:29,252 I'm glad you called. 720 01:07:29,378 --> 01:07:31,588 I didn't expect to see you again. 721 01:07:31,714 --> 01:07:35,592 I'm on a little vacation. 722 01:07:35,718 --> 01:07:40,138 I was working in Boca for the last six months. 723 01:07:40,264 --> 01:07:45,018 And now I'm back, and I'm not sure 724 01:07:45,144 --> 01:07:48,313 what I'm gonna do next, you know? 725 01:07:56,072 --> 01:08:01,785 Come on baby, come on. That's it. 726 01:08:01,911 --> 01:08:03,620 There you go. 727 01:08:22,389 --> 01:08:24,516 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 728 01:08:43,035 --> 01:08:47,205 You look so serious. You make me feel a little weird. 729 01:08:47,331 --> 01:08:49,582 Do other people say that to you? 730 01:08:49,708 --> 01:08:52,001 You know, I got a degree in English. 731 01:08:52,128 --> 01:08:54,796 I'm not some stupid faggot. 732 01:08:58,551 --> 01:09:01,970 Hold the lighter underneath, you gotta get more smoke, man. 733 01:09:06,267 --> 01:09:07,225 That's it, hold it. 734 01:09:07,351 --> 01:09:11,062 That's it, let it go, let it go, let it go, let it go. 735 01:09:11,188 --> 01:09:13,356 Easy, easy, yeah. 736 01:09:19,113 --> 01:09:20,321 You like that? 737 01:09:32,168 --> 01:09:37,839 Yeah, that feels good. 738 01:09:37,965 --> 01:09:39,257 Feels really good. 739 01:09:41,218 --> 01:09:45,180 And you, you have a very nice body, Russ. 740 01:09:45,306 --> 01:09:46,806 I like to show off my body. 741 01:09:46,932 --> 01:09:47,473 You do? 742 01:09:47,600 --> 01:09:48,266 Yeah. 743 01:09:48,392 --> 01:09:50,185 That's very good. 744 01:09:55,191 --> 01:09:58,151 You want something to drink? 745 01:09:58,277 --> 01:10:00,778 Yeah just some water please. 746 01:10:00,905 --> 01:10:03,615 Juice, how about juice - I got orange juice. 747 01:10:03,741 --> 01:10:06,367 Sounds perfect. 748 01:10:28,682 --> 01:10:29,515 You okay out there? 749 01:10:29,642 --> 01:10:30,308 Yeah I'm fine. 750 01:10:39,568 --> 01:10:40,777 What're you doing? 751 01:10:40,903 --> 01:10:42,403 I just think I'm gonna leave. 752 01:10:42,529 --> 01:10:46,241 Oh don't, don't do that. You know? 753 01:10:46,367 --> 01:10:50,203 Don't do my drugs and then leave on me. 754 01:10:50,329 --> 01:10:52,497 Don't be one of those guys. 755 01:10:59,088 --> 01:11:01,256 You want to come to the bedroom for a little while? 756 01:13:46,630 --> 01:13:48,548 I'm glad to see you. 757 01:13:49,550 --> 01:13:51,509 Are you? 758 01:13:51,635 --> 01:13:53,511 I'm not sure I would be if I were you. 759 01:13:53,637 --> 01:13:54,887 Yes, I am. 760 01:14:00,394 --> 01:14:02,061 How are you? 761 01:14:03,272 --> 01:14:06,858 I'm great. You? 762 01:14:06,984 --> 01:14:11,112 Good. Better. 763 01:14:14,283 --> 01:14:16,200 That was a doozy? 764 01:14:17,411 --> 01:14:19,620 We always liked a little melodrama, you and I. 765 01:14:22,458 --> 01:14:23,416 I guess we did. 766 01:14:24,543 --> 01:14:27,336 You know I ran into everybody in your life 767 01:14:27,463 --> 01:14:28,384 this past year but you. 768 01:14:28,464 --> 01:14:30,882 I heard that. 769 01:14:32,134 --> 01:14:35,178 The first person I saw when I got back was Alassane. 770 01:14:35,304 --> 01:14:38,556 On the corner of 9th and University. 771 01:14:38,682 --> 01:14:43,436 He gave me the biggest hug anyone has ever given me. 772 01:14:43,562 --> 01:14:46,439 I will be grateful to that guy for the rest of my life. 773 01:14:46,565 --> 01:14:50,568 He and Claire are not together anymore. 774 01:14:50,694 --> 01:14:54,322 I'm sorry to hear that. Was it the kid thing? 775 01:14:54,448 --> 01:14:55,990 Yeah. 776 01:14:56,116 --> 01:15:00,995 Since they broke up, she and I have started 777 01:15:01,121 --> 01:15:03,206 that conversation again. 778 01:15:03,332 --> 01:15:04,707 Have you? 779 01:15:04,833 --> 01:15:05,666 Yeah. 780 01:15:08,504 --> 01:15:12,507 I'm happy to see you, I'm very happy to see you. 781 01:15:14,384 --> 01:15:18,804 You survived, Paul. It's incredible. 782 01:15:18,931 --> 01:15:21,557 I have. It is incredible. 783 01:15:28,732 --> 01:15:34,987 It amazes me that after all this time I can still feel shocked 784 01:15:35,113 --> 01:15:38,574 I don't start and end each day with you. 785 01:15:38,700 --> 01:15:40,576 So what do we do now? 786 01:15:48,377 --> 01:15:52,296 I don't know, Erik. What do you think we should do? 787 01:15:54,716 --> 01:15:58,803 I don't really want to leave you yet. 788 01:16:01,348 --> 01:16:05,184 I think that's probably the best thing for us right now. 789 01:16:08,438 --> 01:16:12,441 I think this has been the perfect beginning for 790 01:16:12,568 --> 01:16:15,528 whatever is going to happen. 791 01:16:22,744 --> 01:16:24,453 OK. 792 01:16:27,916 --> 01:16:30,543 - OK. - OK. 793 01:17:36,360 --> 01:17:39,904 Would you turn that light on, above the bed? 794 01:17:40,030 --> 01:17:41,822 I don't want to be in the dark with you. 795 01:18:16,858 --> 01:18:19,819 I can't believe this is happening. 796 01:18:33,250 --> 01:18:33,750 Erik! 797 01:18:33,875 --> 01:18:34,667 What? 798 01:18:36,503 --> 01:18:38,921 You're not supposed to be naked. 799 01:18:39,047 --> 01:18:41,006 Okay. 800 01:19:12,414 --> 01:19:13,414 We're not having sex. 801 01:19:13,540 --> 01:19:14,498 No! 802 01:19:32,184 --> 01:19:34,143 I just want to be naked with you. 803 01:19:40,484 --> 01:19:42,526 You smell like you. 804 01:19:51,953 --> 01:19:55,790 I think that this is enough for right now, okay? 805 01:19:55,916 --> 01:19:58,250 OK. 806 01:20:16,561 --> 01:20:18,729 Hey! Hey! 807 01:20:20,941 --> 01:20:23,359 Erik, right? 808 01:20:29,741 --> 01:20:34,370 Wait a minute. Ivan? 809 01:20:34,496 --> 01:20:35,412 Igor. 810 01:20:35,539 --> 01:20:43,539 Oh my god, oh my god. That's so embarrassing. 811 01:20:44,005 --> 01:20:47,299 Hey at least I knew it was a Russian name, right? 812 01:20:47,425 --> 01:20:51,345 Hey it's okay. It was a while ago. 813 01:20:51,471 --> 01:20:53,973 How's the... how's the painting going? 814 01:20:54,099 --> 01:20:57,852 Good. How's the film business? 815 01:20:57,978 --> 01:21:00,229 Okay I guess... 816 01:21:05,610 --> 01:21:08,863 Hey do you want to get something to eat? 817 01:21:08,989 --> 01:21:10,948 I've got an hour. 818 01:21:11,074 --> 01:21:12,783 I'd sit with you. 819 01:21:14,244 --> 01:21:17,246 So, you're not with your boyfriend. 820 01:21:17,372 --> 01:21:18,163 I don't know. 821 01:21:18,290 --> 01:21:24,086 He went away for a while, then he came back, 822 01:21:24,212 --> 01:21:27,840 and then we started seeing each other again, 823 01:21:27,966 --> 01:21:30,885 and now I have no idea what's going on. 824 01:21:35,765 --> 01:21:37,205 How long have you guys been together? 825 01:21:37,309 --> 01:21:37,766 For nine years. 826 01:21:37,893 --> 01:21:40,561 You're lucky. 827 01:21:44,941 --> 01:21:48,027 I don't feel lucky. 828 01:21:51,990 --> 01:21:53,991 What about you? 829 01:21:55,118 --> 01:22:00,831 Well I'm sort of seeing someone right now, 830 01:22:00,957 --> 01:22:06,795 but I always lose interest after four months, six months, 831 01:22:06,922 --> 01:22:10,466 that's all they seem to last. 832 01:22:10,592 --> 01:22:15,721 I'm seeing this guy now but it's nothing serious. 833 01:22:15,847 --> 01:22:16,972 It's more like a fuck buddy. 834 01:22:17,098 --> 01:22:23,145 We go out to dinner sometimes - mostly he talks, and I listen. 835 01:22:23,271 --> 01:22:26,190 I like being taken out for dinner, what can I say? 836 01:22:26,316 --> 01:22:28,025 I'm superficial. 837 01:22:29,444 --> 01:22:33,238 Who doesn't like to be taken out to dinner? 838 01:22:33,365 --> 01:22:35,115 I'll take you out to dinner. 839 01:22:36,409 --> 01:22:37,868 Yeah? 840 01:22:40,622 --> 01:22:41,914 Sure. 841 01:22:47,170 --> 01:22:49,755 I'd like that. 842 01:23:37,012 --> 01:23:37,970 Hold on... 843 01:23:41,224 --> 01:23:43,475 Hey... 844 01:23:43,601 --> 01:23:44,268 Hi. 845 01:23:44,394 --> 01:23:45,811 Can we talk? 846 01:23:45,937 --> 01:23:47,938 Um, I'm on the phone. 847 01:23:52,569 --> 01:23:54,028 Can you give me a few minutes? 848 01:24:46,206 --> 01:24:49,083 Okay, so, what you got? 849 01:24:53,379 --> 01:24:56,423 How are you feeling about things? 850 01:24:59,135 --> 01:25:00,636 You're putting it on me. 851 01:25:00,762 --> 01:25:02,262 No that's not what I mean to be doing. 852 01:25:02,388 --> 01:25:04,973 I just, I think we need - 853 01:25:05,100 --> 01:25:07,601 You just wanna know what I think we should do. 854 01:25:10,522 --> 01:25:11,605 Yes. 855 01:25:16,694 --> 01:25:20,030 I think we should move in together. 856 01:25:20,156 --> 01:25:23,325 Someplace totally new. 857 01:25:26,871 --> 01:25:29,665 Either that or break up right now, you decide. 858 01:25:31,543 --> 01:25:34,002 That seems like a high ultimatum, don't you think? 859 01:25:34,129 --> 01:25:36,130 Then let's not do it. 860 01:25:40,135 --> 01:25:44,221 Let's finally really, really, really stop doing it. 861 01:25:44,347 --> 01:25:45,681 Don't say it like that. 862 01:25:45,807 --> 01:25:47,266 What do you want, Erik? 863 01:25:47,392 --> 01:25:49,560 Be clear about that for once in your life. 864 01:25:49,686 --> 01:25:51,270 I'm trying to. 865 01:26:14,210 --> 01:26:17,254 Erik... Erik. 866 01:26:40,403 --> 01:26:42,154 Stop it! 867 01:26:43,198 --> 01:26:45,407 I don't have time for this. 868 01:26:48,161 --> 01:26:51,955 Jill is coming to pick me up to take me to lunch with the kids. 869 01:26:52,081 --> 01:26:54,124 Then I'm taking the 3:20 train back to the city - 870 01:26:54,250 --> 01:26:55,250 are you coming back then? 871 01:26:55,251 --> 01:26:57,961 No, I'm going to stay here until tomorrow. 872 01:26:58,087 --> 01:26:59,671 I've got some work to do. 873 01:26:59,797 --> 01:27:00,672 Okay. 874 01:27:00,798 --> 01:27:04,259 Then you have to pick me up at Jill's at 2:45 875 01:27:04,385 --> 01:27:07,179 to take me to the station. 876 01:27:12,810 --> 01:27:16,188 You have from now until then to make your decision. 877 01:27:16,314 --> 01:27:18,440 I'm not going back to the city by myself 878 01:27:18,566 --> 01:27:19,274 without this being decided. 879 01:27:19,400 --> 01:27:22,152 I... I just think it's a little weird that you give me what, 880 01:27:22,278 --> 01:27:24,947 3 hours? 881 01:27:25,073 --> 01:27:26,406 To make a decision like this? 882 01:27:26,532 --> 01:27:27,324 I'm sorry. 883 01:27:31,246 --> 01:27:34,456 I'm not doing this in order to be difficult. 884 01:27:34,582 --> 01:27:36,667 Or to... 885 01:27:36,793 --> 01:27:38,669 try to control things or whatever you want to 886 01:27:38,795 --> 01:27:41,338 tell your friends I'm doing. 887 01:27:41,464 --> 01:27:46,260 I'm doing this because I have to do this to save my life. 888 01:27:49,889 --> 01:27:53,141 Can you understand? 889 01:27:53,268 --> 01:27:55,602 I do understand. 890 01:28:00,525 --> 01:28:02,234 I have to go. 891 01:28:02,360 --> 01:28:05,654 Can you bring my suitcase later, please? 892 01:28:54,495 --> 01:28:56,913 So do you have a decision for me? 893 01:28:59,375 --> 01:29:01,585 Yes. 894 01:29:03,171 --> 01:29:05,255 Yes, as in your answer is yes? 895 01:29:09,469 --> 01:29:11,011 Yes. 896 01:29:13,598 --> 01:29:14,306 Good. 897 01:29:17,352 --> 01:29:21,355 You're not - you're not worried about our fighting? 898 01:29:21,481 --> 01:29:22,439 Of course I am. 899 01:29:22,565 --> 01:29:26,526 I'm worried about a lot of things. 900 01:29:30,281 --> 01:29:31,782 But I'm happy. 901 01:29:33,242 --> 01:29:34,409 Me too. 902 01:29:37,163 --> 01:29:38,663 You sure about this? 903 01:29:38,790 --> 01:29:39,873 Yes. 904 01:29:39,999 --> 01:29:40,624 Are you? 905 01:29:40,750 --> 01:29:42,125 Yes! 906 01:29:45,546 --> 01:29:46,046 Good. 907 01:30:00,645 --> 01:30:04,356 I'll see you in New York. I love you. 908 01:30:04,482 --> 01:30:08,318 I love you too. 909 01:32:24,914 --> 01:32:26,039 Who is it? 910 01:32:26,165 --> 01:32:27,707 It's Erik. 911 01:32:52,525 --> 01:32:53,775 Come on in. 912 01:33:23,681 --> 01:33:25,557 You can't do it, right? 913 01:33:29,937 --> 01:33:30,562 No. 914 01:33:42,033 --> 01:33:44,701 Well we had some good times together didn't we? 915 01:33:47,288 --> 01:33:49,164 We did. 916 01:34:11,812 --> 01:34:14,272 I need to get ready for work. 917 01:34:43,636 --> 01:34:47,597 I think I left my blue cashmere sweater in your apartment. 918 01:34:47,723 --> 01:34:49,432 You did? 919 01:34:49,558 --> 01:34:51,101 And my raincoat, also. 920 01:34:51,227 --> 01:34:52,560 I saw that. 921 01:34:52,687 --> 01:34:56,773 Will you leave them with the doorman for me please? 922 01:34:56,899 --> 01:34:57,774 Sure. 923 01:34:57,900 --> 01:34:59,734 I'll pick them up later. 924 01:35:04,198 --> 01:35:07,617 I don't think we should see each other for a long time, Erik. 925 01:35:07,743 --> 01:35:09,536 I know. 926 01:35:12,665 --> 01:35:16,418 But you can call me if you need me for anything, anytime. 927 01:35:17,628 --> 01:35:19,003 No. 928 01:35:19,130 --> 01:35:21,548 I can't do that. 929 01:35:23,509 --> 01:35:24,676 It's okay. 930 01:35:27,304 --> 01:35:29,597 I do love you, Paul. 931 01:35:29,724 --> 01:35:35,103 Do you? I wonder. 932 01:35:35,229 --> 01:35:37,230 I do. 933 01:35:42,820 --> 01:35:48,491 Okay. Enough of this. 934 01:35:48,617 --> 01:35:49,701 I'm going to work. 935 01:35:52,079 --> 01:35:54,497 I have a lot to do today. 936 01:36:15,686 --> 01:36:16,811 Be well. 937 01:36:16,937 --> 01:36:19,355 I will be.65370

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