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1
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What is this thing called love?
2
00:00:24,400 --> 00:00:29,040
This funny thing called love?
3
00:00:30,580 --> 00:00:35,480
Just who can solve its mystery?
4
00:00:36,940 --> 00:00:42,780
Why should it make a fool of me?
5
00:00:43,860 --> 00:00:50,500
I saw you there that wonderful day you
6
00:00:50,500 --> 00:00:57,240
took my love and threw it away and so i
7
00:00:57,240 --> 00:01:04,180
asked the lord in heaven above what is
this
8
00:01:04,180 --> 00:01:07,020
thing called love
9
00:01:53,420 --> 00:01:54,420
Come on.
10
00:02:50,220 --> 00:02:51,520
So, a dragon.
11
00:02:52,620 --> 00:02:55,440
Looks like a biker bitch choice.
12
00:02:56,400 --> 00:02:57,400
What does it eat?
13
00:02:58,160 --> 00:02:59,160
Men's dreams.
14
00:02:59,660 --> 00:03:00,660
Uh -huh.
15
00:03:02,500 --> 00:03:03,500
What?
16
00:03:04,140 --> 00:03:07,720
This is not the Jocelyn I know.
17
00:03:08,800 --> 00:03:10,240
You did this on a whim?
18
00:03:10,720 --> 00:03:14,240
Well, maybe you like the Jocelyn you
don't know better than the one you do.
19
00:03:14,520 --> 00:03:17,160
Before I respond, which one am I talking
to right now?
20
00:03:18,670 --> 00:03:20,010
You're asking the wrong person.
21
00:03:20,310 --> 00:03:21,790
I am not even here.
22
00:03:22,190 --> 00:03:24,070
I am in a place of bliss.
23
00:03:24,410 --> 00:03:26,010
That's what you do to me, Michael.
24
00:03:34,590 --> 00:03:35,590
Fuck.
25
00:03:36,370 --> 00:03:38,410
My mother. She's half an hour early.
26
00:03:40,070 --> 00:03:41,070
7 .45.
27
00:03:41,190 --> 00:03:42,630
What's she doing here? I told you.
28
00:03:42,870 --> 00:03:45,650
She's taking me on a spa weekend in San
Diego.
29
00:03:46,320 --> 00:03:48,080
I'm not lifting a finger until Sunday.
30
00:03:48,300 --> 00:03:50,280
Bet your mother will feel right at home
with that dragon.
31
00:03:52,940 --> 00:03:53,380
Thank
32
00:03:53,380 --> 00:04:01,740
you.
33
00:04:03,460 --> 00:04:04,460
Thanks.
34
00:04:13,080 --> 00:04:14,260
You all right, Luther?
35
00:04:14,500 --> 00:04:15,500
Oh, yeah.
36
00:04:15,560 --> 00:04:16,560
Just...
37
00:04:16,850 --> 00:04:22,370
Reacting to the prices of these entrees,
$125 for a steak.
38
00:04:23,070 --> 00:04:24,350
Relax, Luther.
39
00:04:25,190 --> 00:04:27,710
You're going too expensive to my father
anyway.
40
00:04:28,670 --> 00:04:32,190
Well, I take umbrage. I wonder what they
charge for that.
41
00:04:33,670 --> 00:04:35,270
It's kopi beef, Luther.
42
00:04:35,790 --> 00:04:42,550
It's gently yet thoroughly massaged by
hand and sometimes even by foot.
43
00:04:43,290 --> 00:04:44,290
Foot, huh?
44
00:04:44,630 --> 00:04:47,120
Oh. It's remarkable, don't you think,
Luther?
45
00:04:47,420 --> 00:04:49,260
Oh, yes.
46
00:04:50,540 --> 00:04:51,540
Look at there.
47
00:04:55,900 --> 00:04:56,900
Oh,
48
00:05:12,420 --> 00:05:13,420
what language.
49
00:05:13,820 --> 00:05:15,220
Is that you're speaking, Luther?
50
00:05:15,580 --> 00:05:16,680
It's Javanese.
51
00:05:17,020 --> 00:05:19,520
You mean Japanese?
52
00:05:20,180 --> 00:05:22,720
No, Javanese.
53
00:05:23,960 --> 00:05:25,000
From Java.
54
00:05:25,380 --> 00:05:29,340
Ah, and what do we know of Java?
55
00:05:29,660 --> 00:05:32,720
It's where the legendary fossil Java Man
was found.
56
00:05:36,440 --> 00:05:38,400
Oh, fantastic.
57
00:05:39,420 --> 00:05:41,820
I didn't know you were such a fossil
buff, darling.
58
00:05:45,100 --> 00:05:49,140
Go on, Luther, for... God's sakes!
59
00:05:50,380 --> 00:05:55,900
Elaborate! Well, to no one's surprise,
given the abundant rainfall, the rice
60
00:05:55,900 --> 00:05:59,720
fields in Java are among the wettest in
the world.
61
00:06:00,280 --> 00:06:01,280
Really?
62
00:06:02,100 --> 00:06:03,100
How wet?
63
00:06:04,300 --> 00:06:05,300
Soaking.
64
00:06:05,780 --> 00:06:06,780
Soaking.
65
00:06:07,780 --> 00:06:09,880
Okay, well, honey, let's get some beef,
yeah?
66
00:06:11,640 --> 00:06:14,080
That dinner went on fucking forever.
67
00:06:15,120 --> 00:06:17,360
I thought Luther would never shut up
about Java.
68
00:06:17,960 --> 00:06:19,600
Like I give a brown donut.
69
00:06:21,400 --> 00:06:23,740
You know what was the best time of my
marriage to Pemi?
70
00:06:24,420 --> 00:06:28,560
The year she was in prison for tax
evasion. My cock finally got a break.
71
00:06:28,920 --> 00:06:34,540
The woman is insatiable. She'll grind
any man down like a piece of wood on a
72
00:06:34,540 --> 00:06:35,540
lathe.
73
00:06:36,060 --> 00:06:39,520
Before I met her, I really loved sex.
74
00:06:40,580 --> 00:06:42,420
But she just wore me out.
75
00:06:43,600 --> 00:06:44,900
So why do I stay with her?
76
00:06:48,220 --> 00:06:49,840
Because we got something together.
77
00:06:51,760 --> 00:06:55,220
Do not mention this to my cock.
78
00:07:05,720 --> 00:07:07,960
Driving much calmer since the anger
management class.
79
00:07:10,820 --> 00:07:12,580
You actually have to come on a ride
-along?
80
00:07:13,040 --> 00:07:14,180
Did you know she was driving?
81
00:07:15,460 --> 00:07:18,960
Michael wanted to see what I'd do when
we're not together trying to do this
82
00:07:18,960 --> 00:07:19,960
her.
83
00:07:28,520 --> 00:07:30,860
Hey, Preston, the big guy, isn't that
Lindell?
84
00:07:31,140 --> 00:07:32,480
A kid never learns.
85
00:07:32,760 --> 00:07:33,760
Down, Michael, down!
86
00:08:08,659 --> 00:08:10,160
Hey, didn't I tell you to stay in the
car?
87
00:08:13,590 --> 00:08:15,570
Relax. I'm not dead.
88
00:08:15,990 --> 00:08:18,830
Unit 407, we have an officer down. Put
some pressure on the wound right here.
89
00:08:19,290 --> 00:08:21,750
Stay here. I'll guide the ambulance in.
90
00:08:24,610 --> 00:08:25,850
I feel as you came.
91
00:08:28,170 --> 00:08:29,430
Put some pressure down there.
92
00:08:31,490 --> 00:08:32,730
Not so hard.
93
00:08:34,309 --> 00:08:35,309
Are you okay?
94
00:08:35,390 --> 00:08:36,390
Me?
95
00:08:36,770 --> 00:08:37,770
Never better.
96
00:08:39,470 --> 00:08:40,470
Flesh wound.
97
00:09:05,960 --> 00:09:06,960
How you doing?
98
00:09:07,540 --> 00:09:08,540
Fine.
99
00:09:09,120 --> 00:09:10,120
Yeah?
100
00:09:10,520 --> 00:09:11,920
That's the first time I've been shot.
101
00:09:12,420 --> 00:09:13,460
How many times?
102
00:09:14,280 --> 00:09:15,280
A couple.
103
00:09:15,800 --> 00:09:16,800
What does it matter?
104
00:09:17,120 --> 00:09:19,600
Oh, I don't know. Life, death, eh.
105
00:09:21,480 --> 00:09:24,320
You're far too melodramatic, you know
that?
106
00:09:25,000 --> 00:09:26,780
Liz, you were shot.
107
00:09:27,100 --> 00:09:28,300
I've been full of holes forever.
108
00:09:28,900 --> 00:09:29,900
What's one more?
109
00:09:32,620 --> 00:09:33,620
Hey.
110
00:09:36,209 --> 00:09:37,610
Hey, you were shot.
111
00:09:38,090 --> 00:09:40,270
Hey, I'm not in a mood.
112
00:09:43,410 --> 00:09:44,410
Come here.
113
00:09:48,250 --> 00:09:52,710
I gotta go get that.
114
00:09:53,610 --> 00:09:54,610
It's the office.
115
00:10:07,530 --> 00:10:12,550
A franchise agreement coming along. A
lot faster now that I decided to draft
116
00:10:12,550 --> 00:10:13,550
on my dad's boat.
117
00:10:13,790 --> 00:10:15,050
I need it first thing in the morning.
118
00:10:16,170 --> 00:10:18,430
It'll be there. Michael, I want you to
meet someone.
119
00:10:19,110 --> 00:10:21,970
Say hello to the reason you are working
so hard.
120
00:10:22,390 --> 00:10:23,390
Marilla Brunetti.
121
00:10:23,570 --> 00:10:24,570
Buongiorno, Michele.
122
00:10:24,810 --> 00:10:25,810
Buongiorno.
123
00:10:26,090 --> 00:10:30,750
It's an honor. I had one of the best
meals of my life at Ristorante Brunetti
124
00:10:30,750 --> 00:10:33,010
Florence. Ah, perfetto.
125
00:10:33,480 --> 00:10:37,640
I will have my husband prepare you un
piatto cosรฌ speciale at the New
126
00:10:37,640 --> 00:10:38,640
Las Vegas.
127
00:10:39,080 --> 00:10:40,080
Ciao, Michele.
128
00:10:40,340 --> 00:10:41,340
Ciao!
129
00:10:46,860 --> 00:10:49,020
Don't ever do that again.
130
00:10:50,900 --> 00:10:53,140
I'm going to go home. No, you don't.
131
00:10:53,540 --> 00:10:55,180
There's no one there to take care of
you.
132
00:10:55,380 --> 00:10:57,340
I don't need anybody to take care of me.
133
00:10:59,960 --> 00:11:01,280
That's what this is all about.
134
00:11:02,140 --> 00:11:03,640
That's what... What's about?
135
00:11:04,380 --> 00:11:09,100
You can't stand anybody looking after
you.
136
00:11:09,760 --> 00:11:11,200
Showing you some concern.
137
00:11:12,120 --> 00:11:13,980
Yeah? So?
138
00:11:47,830 --> 00:11:51,710
Wheatgrass. Oh, it tastes like my mouth
is just in mode.
139
00:11:55,170 --> 00:11:56,610
What are you drinking there, darling?
140
00:11:57,110 --> 00:11:58,490
It's naked Chardonnay.
141
00:12:01,650 --> 00:12:02,690
It's perfection.
142
00:12:10,350 --> 00:12:12,070
Perfection. That's fucking great.
143
00:12:12,870 --> 00:12:14,670
You should write wine reviews, mother.
144
00:12:15,600 --> 00:12:22,440
Did I tell you the gardener saw me and
Michael in the bedroom, naked?
145
00:12:23,620 --> 00:12:25,640
How much did he see?
146
00:12:26,920 --> 00:12:28,700
We were in the afterglow.
147
00:12:30,620 --> 00:12:32,240
Michael is quite a lover.
148
00:12:32,740 --> 00:12:39,120
Well, I'm sure I'm transgressing some
Freudian boundaries, but your father's
149
00:12:39,120 --> 00:12:40,120
so bad.
150
00:12:40,220 --> 00:12:41,440
He could turn pro.
151
00:12:41,880 --> 00:12:44,560
Why, there's this little thing that he
does. Okay, Mother, TMI.
152
00:12:46,160 --> 00:12:47,160
T -M -I.
153
00:12:48,060 --> 00:12:49,460
You brought it up.
154
00:12:50,100 --> 00:12:51,220
I brought up me.
155
00:12:51,560 --> 00:12:58,340
Not you and my father, the pro. Well,
point is, thanks to your dad's
156
00:12:58,340 --> 00:13:01,960
skills and staggering sperm count,
you're here.
157
00:13:02,280 --> 00:13:04,740
We should celebrate the man and his
penis.
158
00:13:05,700 --> 00:13:06,740
You said penis.
159
00:13:07,120 --> 00:13:08,760
I didn't just imagine that.
160
00:13:09,260 --> 00:13:11,340
My asthma has a whole new trigger now.
161
00:13:11,740 --> 00:13:12,740
Girl talk.
162
00:13:14,700 --> 00:13:15,700
Trying to bond.
163
00:13:19,220 --> 00:13:20,400
This place is nice.
164
00:13:21,600 --> 00:13:23,240
A chance to forget who we are.
165
00:13:23,620 --> 00:13:24,960
You never want to do that.
166
00:13:25,480 --> 00:13:28,220
There are too many people out there
ready to do it for you.
167
00:13:45,100 --> 00:13:46,100
What time's your flight?
168
00:13:47,560 --> 00:13:48,560
Seven.
169
00:13:49,140 --> 00:13:51,120
That means you'll be in Florence by mid
-morning.
170
00:13:54,880 --> 00:13:57,400
Remember watching the sunrise together
when we flew back?
171
00:14:01,480 --> 00:14:03,340
I've had such a wonderful time with you,
Arthur.
172
00:14:04,700 --> 00:14:06,200
We could have this all the time.
173
00:14:08,700 --> 00:14:10,500
That would ruin everything.
174
00:14:35,510 --> 00:14:36,510
Hey, Rembrandt.
175
00:14:39,310 --> 00:14:40,310
Bleeding?
176
00:14:41,490 --> 00:14:42,490
Aren't we all?
177
00:14:43,970 --> 00:14:46,290
You must be Mikey's new friend, Liz.
178
00:14:47,350 --> 00:14:48,350
I'm Vic.
179
00:14:50,710 --> 00:14:51,710
Shot or stabbed?
180
00:14:52,090 --> 00:14:53,870
Shot. It's the flesh wound.
181
00:14:54,150 --> 00:14:55,430
I've got a million of those.
182
00:14:55,950 --> 00:14:57,350
That's why I act the way I do.
183
00:14:59,170 --> 00:15:00,210
You hungry?
184
00:15:01,110 --> 00:15:02,410
Yeah. Come on.
185
00:15:08,110 --> 00:15:09,110
Tuna fish.
186
00:15:10,350 --> 00:15:11,350
Especially.
187
00:15:13,670 --> 00:15:15,670
Be honest, I eat it for the mercury.
188
00:15:16,610 --> 00:15:19,250
Figure one day it'll make my cock light
up in the dark.
189
00:15:19,830 --> 00:15:21,350
That'd be great. You can read in bed.
190
00:15:22,590 --> 00:15:23,830
I'll have to buy a book.
191
00:15:26,570 --> 00:15:27,730
Michael told me about you.
192
00:15:28,510 --> 00:15:31,110
What did he say?
193
00:15:31,750 --> 00:15:33,310
That he wishes he was more like you.
194
00:15:34,850 --> 00:15:35,850
Bad idea.
195
00:15:36,880 --> 00:15:38,560
It's enough for me to go around for
everybody.
196
00:15:41,320 --> 00:15:46,700
Um, so... You don't care that Michael
Thamey? The guy who's engaged?
197
00:15:48,180 --> 00:15:50,520
I believe in the theory of magnetic
north.
198
00:15:51,380 --> 00:15:55,020
No matter where you think you are or
where you think you want to be, you're
199
00:15:55,020 --> 00:15:56,380
drawn to magnetic north.
200
00:15:57,780 --> 00:16:01,040
And you, my dear, are magnetic north.
201
00:16:04,760 --> 00:16:05,760
I, um...
202
00:16:06,000 --> 00:16:07,620
Thanks for letting me stay on your boat.
203
00:16:08,400 --> 00:16:09,960
Anytime. And it's a yacht.
204
00:16:10,400 --> 00:16:13,420
Oh. You think I'd spend this kind of
money on a boat?
205
00:16:16,640 --> 00:16:17,640
Vic,
206
00:16:18,580 --> 00:16:19,840
I should get going.
207
00:16:20,100 --> 00:16:21,340
Well, I'm just getting to know you.
208
00:16:21,980 --> 00:16:22,980
Where do you have to go?
209
00:16:23,360 --> 00:16:24,360
Home.
210
00:16:24,560 --> 00:16:26,780
Well, probably a good idea.
211
00:16:27,500 --> 00:16:30,260
Stick around here much longer, I'll just
end up marrying you.
212
00:16:30,520 --> 00:16:32,200
Oh. What's your ring size?
213
00:16:35,310 --> 00:16:36,310
Finish your lunch.
214
00:16:36,850 --> 00:16:37,850
Okay.
215
00:16:45,790 --> 00:16:47,270
Ah, Michael.
216
00:16:47,870 --> 00:16:52,130
Meet Hansine. It means God is good in
Norwegian.
217
00:16:53,510 --> 00:16:58,870
I love your cut, but if you ever wanted
no friend title, call me.
218
00:16:59,110 --> 00:17:03,290
She won a trophy in Oslo for best
sideburn design.
219
00:17:04,170 --> 00:17:05,210
Long as best.
220
00:17:05,810 --> 00:17:10,109
But they must align with the list to be
truly alive.
221
00:17:10,790 --> 00:17:15,150
Oh, that's life on the high seas with
Dirty Harriet. She's getting there.
222
00:17:15,869 --> 00:17:16,869
You believe this?
223
00:17:17,750 --> 00:17:21,609
Spent all night last night working on
the Bernetti franchise agreements for
224
00:17:21,609 --> 00:17:23,270
Arthur and he's not even here?
225
00:17:23,589 --> 00:17:25,550
It wasn't a weird funk this morning.
226
00:17:26,210 --> 00:17:31,690
He said, did you ever think something
would go one way in your life and
227
00:17:32,080 --> 00:17:35,780
When you discovered you were wrong, it
shook the primal order.
228
00:17:36,040 --> 00:17:37,040
He said that?
229
00:17:37,280 --> 00:17:38,960
You think he's coming out?
230
00:17:39,180 --> 00:17:41,860
I hope not. He doesn't have the wardrobe
for it.
231
00:17:43,060 --> 00:17:44,060
Very true.
232
00:17:45,780 --> 00:17:52,380
I am the last living Akhilesh of Swami
Amravati, who, as you all know, was the
233
00:17:52,380 --> 00:17:55,520
greatest proponent of the ten -hour
orgasm.
234
00:17:56,160 --> 00:18:00,280
I was his lover from 1951 to 1953.
235
00:18:01,110 --> 00:18:05,550
and the inspiration for his first book,
The Rigors of Endless Pleasure.
236
00:18:06,570 --> 00:18:12,050
I remember the summer we met at his
seaside retreat in Jammu, Azmir.
237
00:18:13,070 --> 00:18:17,350
It was there that he taught the ancient
secrets of breath control and clitoral
238
00:18:17,350 --> 00:18:18,350
levitation.
239
00:18:18,670 --> 00:18:22,190
There are those who say he died, but I
was there.
240
00:18:22,790 --> 00:18:28,810
After he and I had an all -day love
-making session, the Swami had an eleven
241
00:18:28,810 --> 00:18:30,010
-hour orgasm.
242
00:18:30,460 --> 00:18:32,160
and simply dematerialized.
243
00:18:32,580 --> 00:18:34,860
Now that's an organ.
244
00:19:49,200 --> 00:19:50,860
You do me in, counselor.
245
00:19:52,120 --> 00:19:53,500
What can I do for you?
246
00:19:54,460 --> 00:19:57,240
I am wounded, but I'm motivated.
247
00:20:04,920 --> 00:20:10,800
I'd like to fall asleep next to you.
248
00:20:11,680 --> 00:20:12,840
I'd like that, too.
249
00:20:13,300 --> 00:20:14,300
Okay.
250
00:20:25,930 --> 00:20:27,470
Pain is for people who feel pain.
251
00:20:30,250 --> 00:20:31,650
I met your dad today.
252
00:20:32,230 --> 00:20:33,230
Oh, yeah?
253
00:20:33,730 --> 00:20:34,750
He hit on you?
254
00:20:35,650 --> 00:20:36,910
He talked to me.
255
00:20:38,510 --> 00:20:39,610
It's not like him.
256
00:20:41,130 --> 00:20:42,850
Everyone has sides.
257
00:21:03,630 --> 00:21:04,630
Are you okay?
258
00:21:04,650 --> 00:21:05,650
Get away.
259
00:21:05,710 --> 00:21:06,710
Liz.
260
00:21:07,390 --> 00:21:08,390
Get away.
261
00:21:08,710 --> 00:21:12,950
Okay. What's going on? I dropped my last
pain pill. I can't fucking find it.
262
00:21:13,330 --> 00:21:14,890
I'm in fucking pain.
263
00:21:15,370 --> 00:21:18,090
Just get the fuck out. I'll help you
find the pill.
264
00:21:18,310 --> 00:21:20,290
Get the fuck out.
265
00:21:20,530 --> 00:21:22,150
Hey. Hey, calm down.
266
00:21:23,650 --> 00:21:24,650
Stop it.
267
00:21:26,710 --> 00:21:28,290
Okay, okay. Come here.
268
00:21:29,090 --> 00:21:30,090
Come here.
269
00:21:30,510 --> 00:21:31,570
Let's lie you down.
270
00:21:31,910 --> 00:21:32,990
I'll find the pill.
271
00:21:36,800 --> 00:21:37,800
character.
272
00:21:38,180 --> 00:21:39,200
You know who said that?
273
00:21:39,580 --> 00:21:40,580
No.
274
00:21:41,760 --> 00:21:42,760
Yes.
275
00:21:43,100 --> 00:21:44,500
Kennedy? No.
276
00:21:45,560 --> 00:21:46,580
It was my mother.
277
00:21:47,960 --> 00:21:49,320
Two months before she died.
278
00:21:50,440 --> 00:21:53,480
She didn't pick character at all. I just
killed her.
279
00:21:54,020 --> 00:21:57,280
I'm sorry. I didn't know that, Liz. You
never told me that. It wasn't much of a
280
00:21:57,280 --> 00:21:58,280
story.
281
00:21:59,960 --> 00:22:03,080
She was fine and then we buried her.
282
00:22:06,190 --> 00:22:07,190
I'll find the pill.
283
00:22:09,210 --> 00:22:11,310
Oh, God, I hate you being so nice to me.
284
00:22:11,530 --> 00:22:12,349
I know.
285
00:22:12,350 --> 00:22:13,350
No, I really do.
286
00:22:13,550 --> 00:22:14,550
Oh, I know.
287
00:22:16,810 --> 00:22:17,810
Oh, God.
288
00:22:21,830 --> 00:22:22,830
Hi,
289
00:22:25,970 --> 00:22:26,970
stranger. Hi.
290
00:22:27,210 --> 00:22:28,210
What are you doing?
291
00:22:29,010 --> 00:22:30,790
I'm working late.
292
00:22:32,250 --> 00:22:34,170
It was the mother -daughter weekend.
293
00:22:34,970 --> 00:22:37,930
The perfect pedicure solves every
problem in life.
294
00:22:38,130 --> 00:22:39,410
You have a problem?
295
00:22:39,730 --> 00:22:40,730
We had a blast.
296
00:22:41,590 --> 00:22:43,710
Gossiping, eating like crazy.
297
00:22:44,110 --> 00:22:46,310
I mean, the place took forever to get
to.
298
00:22:46,510 --> 00:22:51,150
And some of the women there were just
off the charts.
299
00:22:52,010 --> 00:22:53,010
Here's a tip.
300
00:22:53,350 --> 00:22:57,890
Never get into a mud bath next to a
divorcee. Huh? I'm losing it.
301
00:22:58,390 --> 00:22:59,390
Hey,
302
00:23:00,110 --> 00:23:01,110
call you tomorrow.
303
00:23:09,390 --> 00:23:10,390
Okay open.
304
00:23:12,410 --> 00:23:13,410
Thank you.
19642
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