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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,755 --> 00:00:02,632 QUENTIN: Previously on The Magicians... 2 00:00:02,716 --> 00:00:03,967 JULIA: We found a key, too. 3 00:00:04,050 --> 00:00:06,178 The ghost said it has the power 4 00:00:06,261 --> 00:00:07,387 to reveal things that are hidden. 5 00:00:07,470 --> 00:00:08,638 I'm a hidden thing. 6 00:00:08,722 --> 00:00:09,973 I'm Hyman. 7 00:00:10,056 --> 00:00:11,391 When I first got stuck 8 00:00:11,474 --> 00:00:13,268 in the astral plane, 9 00:00:13,351 --> 00:00:15,729 I spent months trying to push things. 10 00:00:15,812 --> 00:00:16,980 I never got anywhere. 11 00:00:17,063 --> 00:00:19,399 Until I tried being the thing. 12 00:00:19,691 --> 00:00:21,401 Holy zerts! You did it! 13 00:00:21,651 --> 00:00:23,069 The farmers are hesitant 14 00:00:23,153 --> 00:00:25,155 because you're asking them to throw out food 15 00:00:25,238 --> 00:00:28,074 and replace it with, uh... MARGO: Inedible mushrooms. 16 00:00:28,158 --> 00:00:30,744 I got it. I just need it done. 17 00:00:31,036 --> 00:00:33,663 On Earth we tend to meet the people we're gonna marry first. 18 00:00:33,747 --> 00:00:36,499 FAIRY QUEEN: Surely you've heard of the Tribe of The Floating Mountain. 19 00:00:37,918 --> 00:00:39,169 (BLADE SLICES) (GASPS) 20 00:00:39,336 --> 00:00:41,254 FOMAR: It is my duty and honor 21 00:00:41,338 --> 00:00:43,298 to take the place of my late brother. 22 00:00:43,715 --> 00:00:45,550 ALICE: Why do you have magic? JULIA: I don't know. 23 00:00:45,675 --> 00:00:47,177 I'd do anything to get it back. 24 00:00:47,302 --> 00:00:49,471 If I could give it to you, I would. 25 00:00:49,846 --> 00:00:51,306 What if you could? 26 00:00:59,105 --> 00:01:00,982 Whoo. Sorry. 27 00:01:01,441 --> 00:01:02,609 Okay. 28 00:01:06,696 --> 00:01:08,615 ALICE: Last I checked, we're looking for a spell, 29 00:01:08,698 --> 00:01:10,242 not starting an eBay store. 30 00:01:10,325 --> 00:01:13,411 There's this old hedge story I once heard 31 00:01:13,495 --> 00:01:15,538 about some sort of electrical transfer 32 00:01:15,622 --> 00:01:19,042 Marina used to steal magic from some poor faun. 33 00:01:19,125 --> 00:01:20,543 People still talk about it. 34 00:01:21,670 --> 00:01:23,213 Just look. 35 00:01:26,508 --> 00:01:28,301 So, you want us to reverse engineer 36 00:01:28,385 --> 00:01:30,804 a hedge witch urban legend using kids' toys? 37 00:01:30,887 --> 00:01:33,181 I mean, aluminum wiring's been scant since the '90s, 38 00:01:33,265 --> 00:01:35,141 so unless you have a better idea... 39 00:01:42,399 --> 00:01:43,984 (MURMURING IN FARSI) 40 00:01:57,664 --> 00:01:59,291 Do you feel anything? 41 00:01:59,374 --> 00:02:00,417 No. 42 00:02:01,584 --> 00:02:02,794 Go again? 43 00:02:06,589 --> 00:02:07,590 (MUSIC PLAYING) 44 00:02:07,674 --> 00:02:09,342 Oh, as long as I know 45 00:02:09,426 --> 00:02:11,052 How to love I know I'll stay alive 46 00:02:11,136 --> 00:02:13,054 Why did that just turn on by itself? 47 00:02:13,263 --> 00:02:14,306 Oh, my God. 48 00:02:14,514 --> 00:02:15,724 I've got all my love to give 49 00:02:15,807 --> 00:02:17,225 And I'll survive 50 00:02:18,518 --> 00:02:19,728 Give me your hand. 51 00:02:20,145 --> 00:02:21,813 Wait. Stop. 52 00:02:22,147 --> 00:02:23,565 Do not do this. 53 00:02:23,940 --> 00:02:25,483 Did you just use that fish as a doorbell? 54 00:02:25,567 --> 00:02:27,152 I've been trying to warn you guys for, like, an hour. 55 00:02:27,235 --> 00:02:30,155 Being the fish button is the first thing in this entire room that's worked. 56 00:02:30,322 --> 00:02:31,406 What are you trying to warn us about? 57 00:02:31,489 --> 00:02:32,490 This spell. 58 00:02:32,907 --> 00:02:34,159 I've seen it in person. 59 00:02:34,242 --> 00:02:35,410 JULIA: Are you serious? 60 00:02:35,910 --> 00:02:37,120 Yeah. 61 00:02:37,746 --> 00:02:39,706 Couple months back on a book-stealing job, 62 00:02:39,789 --> 00:02:41,791 I saw a group of magically-starved idiots 63 00:02:42,167 --> 00:02:44,711 do the transfer, and by the end of it, 64 00:02:44,794 --> 00:02:46,755 everyone was on fire. 65 00:02:47,964 --> 00:02:49,549 Trust me. Fogg was right. 66 00:02:49,632 --> 00:02:51,593 It's a bad idea. 67 00:02:52,927 --> 00:02:55,388 Wait a minute. Did you just say Fogg was right? 68 00:02:55,555 --> 00:02:56,556 Oh... 69 00:02:56,639 --> 00:02:57,766 Fuck me. 70 00:02:57,849 --> 00:02:59,392 You have magic. 71 00:02:59,601 --> 00:03:00,852 And you're just now telling me? 72 00:03:00,935 --> 00:03:03,396 Don't take this the wrong way, 73 00:03:03,480 --> 00:03:05,732 but you've been a little drunk. 74 00:03:05,815 --> 00:03:07,942 And unreliable. Yes. 75 00:03:08,193 --> 00:03:12,489 I'm drunk, but I am entirely reliable. 76 00:03:15,617 --> 00:03:17,952 Um, maybe we should get back to Marina's spell. 77 00:03:18,119 --> 00:03:20,163 It wasn't Marina's spell. It's mine. 78 00:03:20,246 --> 00:03:22,457 She stole it from my private collection. 79 00:03:23,333 --> 00:03:25,627 And if any of you had attended my annual colloquia 80 00:03:25,710 --> 00:03:28,129 on prohibited magic, you would know 81 00:03:28,213 --> 00:03:30,632 that its proper name is the Voltaic Transfer. 82 00:03:30,715 --> 00:03:32,717 It is incredibly delicate. 83 00:03:32,801 --> 00:03:34,636 We know that, but... But what? 84 00:03:34,719 --> 00:03:36,304 But you want to rid yourself 85 00:03:36,388 --> 00:03:38,807 of the one thing we all so desperately want? 86 00:03:38,890 --> 00:03:40,225 If you understood what... 87 00:03:40,308 --> 00:03:41,309 You understand. 88 00:03:42,060 --> 00:03:43,812 I'm a Magician with no magic. 89 00:03:44,229 --> 00:03:46,439 A dean without a school. 90 00:03:46,731 --> 00:03:48,942 Just a blind, unemployed 91 00:03:49,025 --> 00:03:51,194 black man in America. 92 00:03:52,153 --> 00:03:57,242 Which, shockingly, was actually being kept 38% more tolerant 93 00:03:57,325 --> 00:03:59,411 through a series of enchantments 94 00:03:59,494 --> 00:04:01,413 which have now died. 95 00:04:01,496 --> 00:04:03,623 In case you hadn't noticed or perhaps maybe you weren't 96 00:04:03,706 --> 00:04:05,542 in a position to need to. Okay, you're really drunk. 97 00:04:05,667 --> 00:04:06,668 (LOUDLY) So what? 98 00:04:08,461 --> 00:04:10,296 What does it matter? 99 00:04:10,922 --> 00:04:12,799 Alice, of all people, you should know better 100 00:04:12,882 --> 00:04:14,467 than to attempt this. 101 00:04:14,551 --> 00:04:16,970 You want to blow yourselves up? Is that it? (SNICKERS) 102 00:04:20,723 --> 00:04:23,268 JULIA: Um... Just give me one second. 103 00:04:26,104 --> 00:04:27,355 Okay. 104 00:04:28,106 --> 00:04:29,357 (EXHALES DEEPLY) 105 00:04:54,340 --> 00:04:55,800 Uh, they'll hold for a day or two, 106 00:04:55,884 --> 00:04:57,719 but then Alice can recharge them. 107 00:04:58,970 --> 00:05:01,222 After we finish the transfer. 108 00:05:01,639 --> 00:05:04,434 I know. Everything is fucked. 109 00:05:04,809 --> 00:05:07,270 I'm sorry. It's not your fault. 110 00:05:07,812 --> 00:05:08,938 Julia. 111 00:05:09,022 --> 00:05:11,566 Yeah, well, it's not not my fault either, so... 112 00:05:11,649 --> 00:05:14,611 What you two utter idiots need, 113 00:05:14,694 --> 00:05:16,029 if you don't want to die, 114 00:05:16,196 --> 00:05:18,406 is the flesh of a magical creature 115 00:05:18,490 --> 00:05:21,576 to act as a sort of semiconductor. 116 00:05:21,659 --> 00:05:25,371 A potent energy-drainer. An incubus. 117 00:05:30,084 --> 00:05:31,419 MARGO: If this is about the whole 118 00:05:31,503 --> 00:05:32,795 marriage not being consummated yet, 119 00:05:32,879 --> 00:05:34,881 don't worry, it'll happen. 120 00:05:35,006 --> 00:05:37,133 Oh, no, no, no. You misunderstand me, my dear. 121 00:05:37,675 --> 00:05:39,719 See, I've heard a rumor about your adviser, 122 00:05:39,886 --> 00:05:42,555 the Pickwick? Sighted in a certain corridor, 123 00:05:42,639 --> 00:05:44,307 taking scrapings from the wall. 124 00:05:44,390 --> 00:05:46,184 He's just a compulsive redecorator. 125 00:05:46,351 --> 00:05:48,770 You might be interested to know that we both have been 126 00:05:48,853 --> 00:05:51,439 plotting against our mutual friend. 127 00:05:51,689 --> 00:05:52,815 Hmm. 128 00:05:52,941 --> 00:05:55,568 No idea what you're talking about. 129 00:05:56,778 --> 00:05:58,238 Margo. 130 00:05:58,404 --> 00:05:59,781 You can trust me. 131 00:05:59,864 --> 00:06:01,741 The misguided actions of my son 132 00:06:01,824 --> 00:06:05,495 have soured both sides of our arrangement. 133 00:06:05,578 --> 00:06:09,582 I've acquired a weapon forged in the foundries of Stonehaven. 134 00:06:10,583 --> 00:06:12,126 When the time is right, 135 00:06:12,210 --> 00:06:14,712 we could use it to kill the Fairy Queen. 136 00:06:19,509 --> 00:06:22,303 Hi. Oh, hell, no. 137 00:06:22,595 --> 00:06:24,097 Move. 138 00:06:24,180 --> 00:06:26,641 Hang your sheets out the window afterwards, dear. 139 00:06:26,724 --> 00:06:28,685 Guards! Guards! 140 00:06:28,768 --> 00:06:30,812 Don't even think about closing it. No! 141 00:06:30,895 --> 00:06:33,147 Guards! 142 00:06:34,857 --> 00:06:35,942 (BANGING ON DOOR) 143 00:06:36,025 --> 00:06:37,068 Let me out! 144 00:06:38,903 --> 00:06:40,905 (THEME MUSIC PLAYING) 145 00:06:48,705 --> 00:06:48,871 MAN: I don't give a shit if you have to find someone 146 00:06:48,871 --> 00:06:50,665 MAN: I don't give a shit if you have to find someone 147 00:06:50,748 --> 00:06:52,125 to sell those shares short. 148 00:06:52,208 --> 00:06:53,876 I need them today. 149 00:06:54,919 --> 00:06:56,546 So the incubus is a hedge fund manager? 150 00:06:56,963 --> 00:06:58,006 Plus 5%. 151 00:06:58,089 --> 00:07:00,008 And not one more cent, you piece of monkey shit. 152 00:07:00,091 --> 00:07:01,718 Just remember what Fogg said. 153 00:07:02,552 --> 00:07:03,886 Be respectful, no matter what. 154 00:07:04,596 --> 00:07:05,888 You got two minutes. 155 00:07:06,055 --> 00:07:08,474 Henry Fogg said that you might be able 156 00:07:08,558 --> 00:07:10,018 to help us power our spell. 157 00:07:10,518 --> 00:07:13,771 Uh... We just... We need to use your thing. 158 00:07:13,980 --> 00:07:16,524 My what? Your... Your thing. 159 00:07:16,608 --> 00:07:18,776 Your... Your business. 160 00:07:19,110 --> 00:07:20,445 Sorry? 161 00:07:20,862 --> 00:07:23,656 Your little friend. Uh, I mean... Your big friend. 162 00:07:24,574 --> 00:07:26,576 Well, I'm sure your friend 163 00:07:26,659 --> 00:07:28,703 is perfectly proportioned to your body. 164 00:07:28,786 --> 00:07:32,081 I was just saying... Your penis. 165 00:07:32,832 --> 00:07:36,544 Yep, we need to use your penis to power our spell. 166 00:07:36,628 --> 00:07:38,421 And we know that you need it too. 167 00:07:38,504 --> 00:07:40,590 So that's why we'll build the spell around it. 168 00:07:40,673 --> 00:07:42,008 It'll be completely painless 169 00:07:42,091 --> 00:07:43,718 and should only take a couple minutes. 170 00:07:48,389 --> 00:07:50,308 (LAUGHS) 171 00:07:56,272 --> 00:07:58,650 I can't believe that actually worked! 172 00:07:58,733 --> 00:08:00,652 Wha... What actually worked? 173 00:08:00,818 --> 00:08:03,529 I planted this joke on Fogg 25 years ago. 174 00:08:03,613 --> 00:08:05,823 I had him totally convinced that I had a magic Johnson. 175 00:08:05,907 --> 00:08:07,909 Wait, so you... You don't have a magic... 176 00:08:07,992 --> 00:08:09,160 Of course not. 177 00:08:09,327 --> 00:08:10,745 That's ridiculous. No, it's not. 178 00:08:10,828 --> 00:08:12,580 I mean, you're an incubus. 179 00:08:12,664 --> 00:08:14,957 Isn't sex, like, your thing? 180 00:08:15,375 --> 00:08:16,876 Gods no. 181 00:08:17,085 --> 00:08:18,753 I don't even like sex. 182 00:08:18,836 --> 00:08:22,799 Stress is a much better way to drain people's energy. 183 00:08:22,882 --> 00:08:24,050 May I? 184 00:08:24,967 --> 00:08:26,094 (SNIFFS) 185 00:08:28,638 --> 00:08:29,972 (EXHALES LOUDLY) 186 00:08:30,223 --> 00:08:31,391 (CHUCKLES) 187 00:08:31,474 --> 00:08:33,142 Oh, and you. 188 00:08:33,226 --> 00:08:35,687 You got a lot of it, I can tell. 189 00:08:35,895 --> 00:08:37,230 (SNIFFS) 190 00:08:38,314 --> 00:08:39,607 (EXHALES) 191 00:08:39,691 --> 00:08:41,275 Delish. 192 00:08:42,026 --> 00:08:44,570 (SNIFFLES) You give me a few more hits of this, 193 00:08:44,654 --> 00:08:45,905 and I'll give you something 194 00:08:45,988 --> 00:08:48,199 that'll actually power your spell. 195 00:08:55,331 --> 00:08:57,792 Is that your tail? Yeah. 196 00:08:57,875 --> 00:08:59,627 Yeah, I grow a new one every spring. 197 00:09:02,755 --> 00:09:04,132 Welcome back. 198 00:09:04,215 --> 00:09:06,926 I see you've misplaced your wife and child. 199 00:09:07,009 --> 00:09:10,304 You'd be shocked how easy it is to misplace people 200 00:09:10,388 --> 00:09:13,641 when your mind's on tax collection and annexation 201 00:09:13,725 --> 00:09:16,853 and unforeseen seafaring confusion. 202 00:09:19,188 --> 00:09:20,857 I'll immediately sail back out there and find them, 203 00:09:20,982 --> 00:09:22,650 of course... No, you won't. 204 00:09:22,734 --> 00:09:25,153 I have a bigger problem I need you to solve. 205 00:09:25,570 --> 00:09:27,155 The Stone Queen has locked 206 00:09:27,238 --> 00:09:29,073 Margo and Fomar in the dungeon. 207 00:09:29,699 --> 00:09:31,242 Wait. What? Why? 208 00:09:31,325 --> 00:09:34,078 She thinks it will get the marriage consummated, 209 00:09:35,163 --> 00:09:37,874 but ultimately I need the union officialized 210 00:09:37,957 --> 00:09:39,667 just as much as the Floaters do. 211 00:09:39,959 --> 00:09:41,461 Listen, pro tip. 212 00:09:41,627 --> 00:09:43,671 Let Margo out of there immediately. 213 00:09:43,755 --> 00:09:45,840 You know her. Force isn't going to work. 214 00:09:45,923 --> 00:09:48,885 True. Force may not work. 215 00:09:49,177 --> 00:09:52,096 But the clever coercion on the part of a trusted friend. 216 00:09:52,180 --> 00:09:53,681 I am not going to coerce Margo 217 00:09:53,765 --> 00:09:55,641 into having sex with a 15-year-old. 218 00:09:55,725 --> 00:09:57,351 Have you never heard of statutory rape? 219 00:09:57,435 --> 00:10:00,313 Fomar isn't a statue. That is not what... 220 00:10:01,522 --> 00:10:04,192 Forget it. You will solve this problem for me. 221 00:10:05,026 --> 00:10:06,110 And if I refuse? 222 00:10:09,655 --> 00:10:12,325 I've been searching for a new keepsake. 223 00:10:13,534 --> 00:10:15,119 Several bits will do. 224 00:10:15,328 --> 00:10:18,331 Fine, but I have a feeling Queen Margo 225 00:10:18,456 --> 00:10:20,333 is going to be a little bit difficult. 226 00:10:22,168 --> 00:10:23,336 FOMAR: I know! 227 00:10:23,419 --> 00:10:25,213 You hate me for killing Micah. 228 00:10:25,296 --> 00:10:27,089 Oh, Jesus Christ. 229 00:10:27,465 --> 00:10:28,758 It's just, in our culture, 230 00:10:28,841 --> 00:10:31,969 younger sons can't marry or inherit property. 231 00:10:32,053 --> 00:10:33,888 Most of us wind up 232 00:10:33,971 --> 00:10:36,808 serving in the Crag Guard or dying in battle. 233 00:10:36,891 --> 00:10:38,893 Is this supposed to make me feel bad for you? 234 00:10:39,101 --> 00:10:40,102 No. 235 00:10:40,937 --> 00:10:42,146 So, do you want to take a break? 236 00:10:42,563 --> 00:10:43,981 Let me touch your maiden peaks? 237 00:10:44,106 --> 00:10:45,900 Do you want me to cut your hands off and have them made 238 00:10:45,983 --> 00:10:47,360 into a decorative, whimsical planter? 239 00:10:47,443 --> 00:10:50,029 How are we supposed to become one flesh 240 00:10:50,112 --> 00:10:52,031 if you won't let me touch you? 241 00:10:52,323 --> 00:10:53,908 We're not. But you're my wife. 242 00:10:54,158 --> 00:10:55,493 Oh, please. 243 00:10:55,910 --> 00:10:57,119 You don't need a wife. 244 00:10:57,620 --> 00:11:00,081 You need a pile of socks and a sex-ed class. 245 00:11:00,164 --> 00:11:03,292 What's a sex class? Who's Ed? 246 00:11:03,376 --> 00:11:04,752 It's something they make you do on Earth. 247 00:11:04,836 --> 00:11:06,087 It makes you never wanna. 248 00:11:08,381 --> 00:11:09,966 How about I show you? 249 00:11:16,848 --> 00:11:18,099 Vaginas. 250 00:11:18,182 --> 00:11:20,601 The leading cause of death in men. 251 00:11:21,185 --> 00:11:22,687 They spread disease. 252 00:11:23,354 --> 00:11:25,898 They explode during childbirth. 253 00:11:27,024 --> 00:11:30,236 But worst of all, they bleed. Every month. 254 00:11:30,528 --> 00:11:32,446 In fact, mine's doing it right now. 255 00:11:33,197 --> 00:11:36,033 Well, that's okay. I like blood. 256 00:11:39,203 --> 00:11:41,038 But do you like teeth? 257 00:11:44,458 --> 00:11:46,168 (EXHALES) Sorry I'm late. 258 00:11:46,544 --> 00:11:47,587 You okay? 259 00:11:48,212 --> 00:11:50,131 Enjoying being a palace guard in your own palace? 260 00:11:50,214 --> 00:11:52,216 This uniform is, like, really sweaty. 261 00:11:52,300 --> 00:11:54,302 Yeah, I know, but it beats 262 00:11:54,385 --> 00:11:56,220 having the Fairy Queen's hand up your ass. 263 00:11:56,304 --> 00:11:58,347 Last thing we need is another puppet king. 264 00:11:59,098 --> 00:12:01,100 Okay, key quest. Hit me. 265 00:12:01,934 --> 00:12:04,020 Uh, okay, so I'm pretty sure that 266 00:12:04,145 --> 00:12:05,813 the fourth key is somewhere 267 00:12:05,897 --> 00:12:08,399 in this stretch of ocean called The Abyss. 268 00:12:08,482 --> 00:12:10,401 Um, it's an uncharted region of Fillory 269 00:12:10,526 --> 00:12:13,821 where it's, like, sort of permanently night. 270 00:12:13,946 --> 00:12:15,031 Um... 271 00:12:15,114 --> 00:12:17,491 But, you know, we get to go 272 00:12:17,575 --> 00:12:21,913 on a quest on a magical boat, so it doesn't totally suck. 273 00:12:21,996 --> 00:12:24,790 Yeah. I wish I could. 274 00:12:25,082 --> 00:12:27,919 Believe me, but duty calls a dozen different ways. 275 00:12:28,002 --> 00:12:30,296 And I can't leave Margo. Right, of course. 276 00:12:30,379 --> 00:12:32,340 Sorry. No. 277 00:12:32,423 --> 00:12:34,884 I was looking forward to going on a boating quest with you. 278 00:12:34,967 --> 00:12:36,510 Who wouldn't? 279 00:12:38,846 --> 00:12:40,848 Think about it. You can take Benedict. 280 00:12:41,223 --> 00:12:43,351 Go be life partners with someone else for a little bit. 281 00:12:43,434 --> 00:12:46,771 But you'll be able to do the... Thing on the prow of a ship 282 00:12:46,854 --> 00:12:48,314 you've been waiting your whole life to do. 283 00:12:48,397 --> 00:12:51,442 What thing? You know, the thing. 284 00:13:05,915 --> 00:13:07,917 Whoo! 285 00:13:10,920 --> 00:13:13,589 (IMITATES BLADE SWISHING) 286 00:13:14,882 --> 00:13:16,968 Sorry. Sorry. 287 00:13:26,560 --> 00:13:28,145 Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. 288 00:13:43,411 --> 00:13:46,622 QUENTIN: Being on a mission is a hell of an antidepressant. 289 00:13:46,706 --> 00:13:48,082 You notice that, Benedict? 290 00:13:48,165 --> 00:13:49,917 Well, now that you mention it. 291 00:13:52,128 --> 00:13:53,421 Whoa. 292 00:13:53,504 --> 00:13:55,214 BENEDICT: We're entering The Abyss, Sire. 293 00:13:58,384 --> 00:14:01,220 It'll be darkness from here on. 294 00:14:04,473 --> 00:14:06,267 Thank you. 295 00:14:17,570 --> 00:14:19,905 So how long until we can keep going? 296 00:14:19,989 --> 00:14:22,324 As soon as we find safe passage, Your Majesty. 297 00:14:22,658 --> 00:14:24,452 WOMAN: ls someone out there? 298 00:14:24,535 --> 00:14:26,203 Help! 299 00:14:28,080 --> 00:14:31,208 Is someone out there? Help! 300 00:14:35,629 --> 00:14:38,257 God, I think there's someone out there on a raft. 301 00:14:39,050 --> 00:14:40,426 (GRUNTING) 302 00:14:44,638 --> 00:14:45,890 (SIGHS) 303 00:14:46,015 --> 00:14:47,058 You okay? 304 00:14:47,141 --> 00:14:51,103 Wow, wow, wow. You just saved the shit out of me. (SIGHS) 305 00:14:51,353 --> 00:14:52,563 Poppy Kline. 306 00:14:52,646 --> 00:14:55,107 Draconologist, postgraduate fellow, and field researcher 307 00:14:55,191 --> 00:14:56,442 at your service. 308 00:14:57,234 --> 00:15:00,488 Holy shit. You're from Brakebills? 309 00:15:01,614 --> 00:15:02,948 Yeah. 310 00:15:09,705 --> 00:15:11,749 So, Brakebills students are kings and queens now? 311 00:15:11,832 --> 00:15:12,875 Yeah. Shit. 312 00:15:12,958 --> 00:15:14,919 I've been stuck in The Abyss way too long. 313 00:15:15,002 --> 00:15:16,170 How did you end up out here anyway? 314 00:15:16,253 --> 00:15:17,546 I came with some other students. 315 00:15:17,880 --> 00:15:20,549 Oh, hey, sorry. I can... Uh... 316 00:15:20,633 --> 00:15:22,885 Spring Break, Class of 2016? 317 00:15:23,219 --> 00:15:24,428 Didn't turn out so well for us, 318 00:15:24,512 --> 00:15:26,263 but that is a whole 'nother story. 319 00:15:26,806 --> 00:15:27,807 Wait, sorry. 320 00:15:27,932 --> 00:15:29,225 Do you know, um... 321 00:15:29,308 --> 00:15:30,726 If the next two words out of your mouth are "Josh" 322 00:15:30,810 --> 00:15:33,020 and "Hoberman," we just became best friends. 323 00:15:33,104 --> 00:15:35,106 No way. He's still alive? 324 00:15:35,439 --> 00:15:37,650 I mean, as far as I know. 325 00:15:37,733 --> 00:15:39,026 Oh, that's amazing. 326 00:15:39,110 --> 00:15:40,736 So how does a Brakebills student 327 00:15:40,820 --> 00:15:43,072 wind up alone on a raft? 328 00:15:43,405 --> 00:15:46,242 Get a girl a drink. I'll tell you the whole story. 329 00:15:46,325 --> 00:15:47,535 All right. 330 00:15:51,122 --> 00:15:52,456 (DRINK POURING) 331 00:16:01,298 --> 00:16:03,092 (CLEARS THROAT) Your Majesty. 332 00:16:03,175 --> 00:16:05,302 An urgent message from Prince Ess of Loria. 333 00:16:05,386 --> 00:16:07,054 Wasn't Ess in the dungeon? 334 00:16:07,138 --> 00:16:08,347 High Queen Margo let him go 335 00:16:08,430 --> 00:16:09,723 as he was innocent of all charges. 336 00:16:10,057 --> 00:16:11,934 Oh, right. Yeah. 337 00:16:13,352 --> 00:16:14,603 Sorry about that. 338 00:16:19,608 --> 00:16:24,155 I figured out the problem. Humans don't mate in captivity. 339 00:16:24,238 --> 00:16:27,032 What Margo and Fomar need is a honeymoon. 340 00:16:27,283 --> 00:16:29,285 An hour's ride north, there is a forest 341 00:16:29,368 --> 00:16:31,412 with naturally-occurring aphrodisiacs 342 00:16:31,495 --> 00:16:34,206 that's guaranteed to get that marriage consummated. 343 00:16:34,415 --> 00:16:36,208 (SIGHS) Fine. 344 00:16:36,458 --> 00:16:38,127 But if you fail... I know, I know. 345 00:16:38,210 --> 00:16:40,504 New keepsakes. Fingers, ears. 346 00:16:40,588 --> 00:16:42,506 Try your spleen. 347 00:16:42,590 --> 00:16:44,508 Okay. Go. 348 00:16:45,885 --> 00:16:48,554 Fieldwork was my thing at Brakebills, and well, dragons. 349 00:16:48,637 --> 00:16:50,139 Love them. 350 00:16:50,222 --> 00:16:52,057 Wait, so what happened to your ship? 351 00:16:52,433 --> 00:16:54,059 Oh. Wrecked. 352 00:16:54,185 --> 00:16:55,311 Off the coast of the Truth waters. 353 00:16:55,394 --> 00:16:58,147 I spent two years on that little picket. 354 00:16:58,230 --> 00:17:01,025 And, bam. Over in an instant. 355 00:17:02,109 --> 00:17:03,444 That was three weeks ago. 356 00:17:04,195 --> 00:17:07,781 You survived for three weeks on a raft by yourself? 357 00:17:08,115 --> 00:17:09,825 Yeah, it was rough. 358 00:17:10,951 --> 00:17:12,244 Especially without magic. 359 00:17:12,328 --> 00:17:13,537 Do you know anything about why the hell 360 00:17:13,621 --> 00:17:16,123 it just went out? I mean... 361 00:17:16,207 --> 00:17:18,334 I just hope someone's fixing it. 362 00:17:18,417 --> 00:17:21,128 That someone is, um, sort of me. 363 00:17:22,546 --> 00:17:26,800 I'm on a quest, right, for these golden keys. 364 00:17:26,884 --> 00:17:28,260 Right, so there's seven of them. 365 00:17:28,344 --> 00:17:31,222 Wait, wait, wait, wait. Golden keys? 366 00:17:31,513 --> 00:17:32,806 Like... 367 00:17:36,268 --> 00:17:37,519 Holy shit. How did you... 368 00:17:37,603 --> 00:17:38,604 Short version? 369 00:17:38,896 --> 00:17:40,064 Stole it. 370 00:17:40,397 --> 00:17:42,524 Mid-voyage we wound up on this random island, 371 00:17:42,608 --> 00:17:45,110 just, like, covered in treasure. 372 00:17:45,194 --> 00:17:46,362 A dragon breeding ground which is like... 373 00:17:46,737 --> 00:17:48,197 Ah. Spontaneous orgasm. 374 00:17:48,572 --> 00:17:50,491 I mean, places like this are so rare. 375 00:17:50,574 --> 00:17:52,201 There are only two species of dragon 376 00:17:52,284 --> 00:17:53,494 that even build treasure-nests. 377 00:17:53,577 --> 00:17:55,704 Anyway, this was in one of them 378 00:17:55,788 --> 00:17:57,539 with a bunch of cool stuff. 379 00:17:57,623 --> 00:18:00,251 But the thing that got me was 380 00:18:00,334 --> 00:18:01,835 I could feel something coming off it. 381 00:18:01,919 --> 00:18:04,213 Yeah. Even now. 382 00:18:04,296 --> 00:18:06,423 It's somehow not dead, right? 383 00:18:07,174 --> 00:18:09,551 And, you know, the dragons were all horny and distracted, 384 00:18:09,635 --> 00:18:11,220 so I just took it. 385 00:18:11,887 --> 00:18:13,055 Just like that? 386 00:18:13,389 --> 00:18:16,267 I'm a person of questionable ethics. (CHUCKLES) 387 00:18:17,184 --> 00:18:18,227 Here. 388 00:18:19,353 --> 00:18:22,606 It's yours, from one quester to another. 389 00:18:24,441 --> 00:18:25,734 Wow. Thank you. 390 00:18:26,652 --> 00:18:27,653 So do you know what it does? 391 00:18:27,736 --> 00:18:30,197 I mean, each one sort of has a unique thing. 392 00:18:30,281 --> 00:18:31,448 I don't know. 393 00:18:32,324 --> 00:18:35,452 Maybe you can figure it out. Yeah. 394 00:18:35,744 --> 00:18:38,497 Uh... Here's to that. 395 00:18:38,998 --> 00:18:40,207 (BOTH LAUGH) 396 00:18:44,169 --> 00:18:45,379 (SIGHS) 397 00:18:46,338 --> 00:18:48,340 You wanna? Yeah. Oh. 398 00:18:51,635 --> 00:18:54,138 Okay. Well, here goes nothing. 399 00:18:56,807 --> 00:18:57,850 (SIGHS) 400 00:18:57,933 --> 00:18:59,310 (SPEAKING FARSI) 401 00:19:01,270 --> 00:19:03,772 Ugh. Man, one of your wires is coming loose. 402 00:19:03,856 --> 00:19:05,649 You're gonna kill yourselves! 403 00:19:05,733 --> 00:19:09,069 Oh, my God. I can't... Golly Moses. 404 00:19:09,361 --> 00:19:11,238 You're right. They're gonna kill themselves. 405 00:19:11,322 --> 00:19:13,574 Don't you have some shower to go haunt? 406 00:19:13,657 --> 00:19:15,409 Oh, no one's showering right now. 407 00:19:15,784 --> 00:19:17,703 Except Fogg, and he's asleep. 408 00:19:17,870 --> 00:19:20,581 Jesus, that man needs help. Is he all right? 409 00:19:20,664 --> 00:19:22,624 Just a bit zozzled, I think. 410 00:19:23,334 --> 00:19:25,419 He was quite naked. (CHUCKLES) 411 00:19:26,170 --> 00:19:28,714 Remarkably well-preserved. 412 00:19:30,007 --> 00:19:32,343 Guess it's possible to age gracefully. 413 00:19:32,760 --> 00:19:33,969 PENNY: Oh, my God. 414 00:19:34,053 --> 00:19:36,013 Fuck, man. I can't watch this. 415 00:19:36,513 --> 00:19:39,391 See? This is what I love about you, Penny. 416 00:19:39,516 --> 00:19:40,851 You act like you don't care, 417 00:19:40,934 --> 00:19:43,645 but really, you care most in this whole story. 418 00:19:43,896 --> 00:19:45,731 Yeah, then... Then why is everyone acting 419 00:19:45,814 --> 00:19:47,691 like I'm not a part of it anymore? 420 00:19:47,775 --> 00:19:52,154 Maybe it's time to blouse this Popsicle stand. 421 00:19:52,321 --> 00:19:53,822 You mean, leave? Why not? 422 00:19:53,906 --> 00:19:55,699 Go find a story to watch 423 00:19:55,783 --> 00:19:57,534 that doesn't make you so depressed. 424 00:19:57,743 --> 00:19:58,786 (GASPING) 425 00:19:58,869 --> 00:20:00,621 Oh, I think they did it. 426 00:20:00,913 --> 00:20:02,122 (GASPS) 427 00:20:07,044 --> 00:20:08,754 I'm having a good time. 428 00:20:09,546 --> 00:20:10,547 Mmm. 429 00:20:14,051 --> 00:20:15,719 You just wait a second, I'm gonna close... 430 00:20:41,787 --> 00:20:43,580 Rise and shine, princess. 431 00:20:44,957 --> 00:20:46,667 (STUTTERS) Who? 432 00:20:46,750 --> 00:20:48,710 The real question, dipshit, is how you managed 433 00:20:48,794 --> 00:20:50,712 to black out after, what, five drinks? 434 00:20:50,796 --> 00:20:52,506 Why do you always have to embarrass yourself? 435 00:20:52,589 --> 00:20:53,632 I don't... 436 00:20:54,466 --> 00:20:55,717 Okay. 437 00:20:57,386 --> 00:20:58,512 Um... 438 00:21:00,681 --> 00:21:02,015 Seriously. 439 00:21:02,474 --> 00:21:05,060 You hold your liquor like a kindergartner. 440 00:21:07,980 --> 00:21:11,483 Sorry, um, can you... Are you... Are you seeing this? 441 00:21:13,861 --> 00:21:15,320 Nobody cares, dude. 442 00:21:15,404 --> 00:21:17,865 They all have actual jobs, unlike you. 443 00:21:18,073 --> 00:21:19,366 Right, okay. 444 00:21:19,700 --> 00:21:20,993 No problem. 445 00:21:27,124 --> 00:21:29,042 What the fuck did you do? Okay, I can explain. 446 00:21:29,126 --> 00:21:31,044 What is this key? Just calm down. 447 00:21:31,128 --> 00:21:33,422 It's all right. There's another me. 448 00:21:33,505 --> 00:21:35,632 And he's mean, and no one else can see him. 449 00:21:35,716 --> 00:21:37,426 Nothing about this is all right. 450 00:21:37,509 --> 00:21:39,261 Okay, listen. Here's the deal. 451 00:21:39,678 --> 00:21:41,805 The key does have a power. No shit. 452 00:21:41,889 --> 00:21:43,474 It takes the darkest parts of you 453 00:21:43,557 --> 00:21:46,477 and makes a kind of... Well, you met it. 454 00:21:46,810 --> 00:21:49,938 It's kind of like a depression monster? 455 00:21:50,022 --> 00:21:52,649 Looks like you, talks like you. 456 00:21:53,859 --> 00:21:56,236 But don't worry, it can't actually hurt you. 457 00:21:56,945 --> 00:21:58,906 Unless... Unless? 458 00:21:58,989 --> 00:22:00,449 Unless it gets in your head 459 00:22:00,532 --> 00:22:01,658 and convinces you to hurt yourself. 460 00:22:01,742 --> 00:22:03,494 Well... But you'll be fine. 461 00:22:03,577 --> 00:22:05,496 It only affects the last person who touched the key. 462 00:22:05,579 --> 00:22:07,539 So just pass it along to someone else. 463 00:22:07,623 --> 00:22:10,667 That's what we did. Who's we? 464 00:22:10,751 --> 00:22:11,919 My former shipmates. 465 00:22:12,002 --> 00:22:13,420 After I stole the key, 466 00:22:13,504 --> 00:22:14,838 we passed it from person to person 467 00:22:14,922 --> 00:22:17,758 until we, you know, ran out of options. 468 00:22:17,841 --> 00:22:20,010 What does that mean, you ran out of options? 469 00:22:20,260 --> 00:22:21,261 Um... 470 00:22:21,345 --> 00:22:22,804 Hit an iceberg? 471 00:22:23,180 --> 00:22:24,848 I happened to be holding the key when we sank 472 00:22:24,932 --> 00:22:26,934 'cause the rest of 'em just couldn't handle it. 473 00:22:27,142 --> 00:22:28,810 You have to be, like, a badass about it, 474 00:22:28,894 --> 00:22:30,729 and what can I say? 475 00:22:30,812 --> 00:22:32,564 They were weak. Okay, I'm sorry. 476 00:22:32,648 --> 00:22:35,692 Exactly how many of them survived the key before you? 477 00:22:35,943 --> 00:22:38,028 Hmm. Maybe, like, half? 478 00:22:38,278 --> 00:22:40,072 This key made half of your shipmates 479 00:22:40,155 --> 00:22:42,533 kill themselves, and you gave it to me? 480 00:22:42,616 --> 00:22:44,451 Yeah. But don't worry. 481 00:22:44,535 --> 00:22:47,329 They were all pretty psychologically damaged already. 482 00:22:47,538 --> 00:22:49,623 You'll be fine. You're so happy and positive. 483 00:22:50,749 --> 00:22:52,626 No. No, no. 484 00:22:52,793 --> 00:22:54,878 I'm not. This is like... 485 00:22:54,962 --> 00:22:56,421 It's like we're on a boat, okay? 486 00:22:56,505 --> 00:22:58,006 This is not how I usually am. 487 00:22:58,090 --> 00:22:59,841 You're usually a wet blanket, self-pitying, 488 00:22:59,925 --> 00:23:01,051 party pooping dickwad. 489 00:23:01,134 --> 00:23:03,053 Shut up! 490 00:23:03,637 --> 00:23:05,430 You better pass that along fast. 491 00:23:05,514 --> 00:23:07,891 What? No! Not if there is a 50% 492 00:23:07,975 --> 00:23:09,518 chance of it killing the next person. 493 00:23:09,893 --> 00:23:11,186 (STUTTERS) 494 00:23:11,645 --> 00:23:12,729 Okay. 495 00:23:13,981 --> 00:23:16,191 Right, yep. I'll just hold on to it. 496 00:23:16,650 --> 00:23:18,360 Until we get back to Whitespire. 497 00:23:18,735 --> 00:23:20,737 I can do that. Your choice. 498 00:23:20,821 --> 00:23:22,239 I mean, we're stuck in The Abyss 499 00:23:22,322 --> 00:23:23,532 till we found our way out. 500 00:23:23,615 --> 00:23:24,616 It could be days. 501 00:23:24,700 --> 00:23:26,326 It could be weeks. 502 00:23:26,618 --> 00:23:28,453 But hey. Don't stress. 503 00:23:29,079 --> 00:23:30,998 You might be fine. You won't be. 504 00:23:31,081 --> 00:23:32,416 You know what? 505 00:23:33,000 --> 00:23:35,669 I have come up against you before, asshole. 506 00:23:36,003 --> 00:23:38,255 Maybe a little more subtly, but you and I both know 507 00:23:38,338 --> 00:23:39,756 that I've got a black belt. 508 00:23:39,965 --> 00:23:41,258 So come at me. 509 00:23:45,971 --> 00:23:47,472 The problem is your hair. 510 00:23:47,556 --> 00:23:48,974 I know you're just trying to hide your face, 511 00:23:49,057 --> 00:23:50,767 but it really only makes it worse. 512 00:23:51,184 --> 00:23:52,769 Seriously, have you ever noticed 513 00:23:52,853 --> 00:23:54,271 that your face sort of looks like a foot? 514 00:23:54,354 --> 00:23:55,939 If feet had frown lines? 515 00:23:56,023 --> 00:23:57,983 I mean, you're definitely aging prematurely, 516 00:23:58,066 --> 00:24:00,944 which is a symptom of early-onset Alzheimer's. 517 00:24:01,028 --> 00:24:03,655 Which, funny, both your grandparents had. 518 00:24:03,739 --> 00:24:06,617 And you will definitely get it so then you'll be 519 00:24:06,700 --> 00:24:08,577 a senile frowny foot-face. 520 00:24:09,161 --> 00:24:10,704 Jesus. Fuck. 521 00:24:12,331 --> 00:24:15,626 This is pointless. You can't run me off. 522 00:24:16,877 --> 00:24:18,879 You can't eat me off. 523 00:24:19,880 --> 00:24:21,757 You can't drink me off. 524 00:24:23,133 --> 00:24:26,011 You can't jerk me off. 525 00:24:26,136 --> 00:24:27,554 God, you're so vulgar. 526 00:24:27,638 --> 00:24:30,182 We had a thing going, and you... You made it 527 00:24:30,265 --> 00:24:32,059 unnecessarily gross. 528 00:24:32,142 --> 00:24:34,770 You sick of the shallow, petty stuff? 529 00:24:35,896 --> 00:24:37,272 I get it. 530 00:24:38,231 --> 00:24:40,067 The thing is, I start on the outside, 531 00:24:40,150 --> 00:24:42,110 and I work my way into the core. 532 00:24:42,361 --> 00:24:45,947 The part of you that kept magic from Julia 533 00:24:46,031 --> 00:24:47,282 when you could have helped her, 534 00:24:47,366 --> 00:24:50,702 that is what set her on that path. 535 00:24:50,786 --> 00:24:54,289 You got your best friend sexually assaulted. 536 00:24:55,082 --> 00:24:57,209 And let's talk about what happened to Alice. 537 00:24:57,292 --> 00:24:58,627 You ruined her. 538 00:24:58,752 --> 00:25:01,213 And she is never going to be the girl that she was. 539 00:25:01,296 --> 00:25:03,882 You killed her, and she is never coming back. 540 00:25:03,965 --> 00:25:07,928 How many people have to pay the price for your heroics? 541 00:25:08,553 --> 00:25:09,680 Just stop! 542 00:25:09,763 --> 00:25:11,973 You are willing to destroy everyone around you 543 00:25:12,057 --> 00:25:14,643 to find something that makes you feel okay. 544 00:25:14,726 --> 00:25:16,687 But you are never gonna feel okay. 545 00:25:16,770 --> 00:25:19,314 No, stop. You're trying to get in my head. 546 00:25:19,606 --> 00:25:20,941 Quentin. 547 00:25:22,776 --> 00:25:24,236 I am your head. 548 00:25:24,319 --> 00:25:27,280 You know I'm right because I am you. 549 00:25:32,828 --> 00:25:36,832 To Mr. and Mrs... Fomar. 550 00:25:37,040 --> 00:25:38,709 Fomar. 551 00:25:39,292 --> 00:25:40,544 Bottoms up. 552 00:25:42,879 --> 00:25:46,174 In my culture, the woman always drinks first. 553 00:25:46,550 --> 00:25:47,718 Drink the wine, Margo. 554 00:25:47,801 --> 00:25:49,344 I don't wanna drink the wine. 555 00:25:49,428 --> 00:25:51,763 What I wanted was for you to handle this, Eliot. 556 00:25:51,847 --> 00:25:53,598 You'll feel better if you just 557 00:25:53,682 --> 00:25:56,643 drink the wine, Margo. 558 00:26:05,277 --> 00:26:06,653 (COUGHS) 559 00:26:08,113 --> 00:26:09,823 So, um... 560 00:26:10,824 --> 00:26:13,118 Do we have sex in the carriage? 561 00:26:13,201 --> 00:26:15,912 Or do we have sex outside? 562 00:26:15,996 --> 00:26:20,041 Or do... I'm not having sex with you. 563 00:26:20,125 --> 00:26:23,336 You psychotic fetus. 564 00:26:23,712 --> 00:26:25,130 Ever. 565 00:26:33,513 --> 00:26:35,390 Either I just killed him with my rage 566 00:26:35,474 --> 00:26:36,933 or you drugged his wine. 567 00:26:37,017 --> 00:26:38,769 And to think... 568 00:26:38,852 --> 00:26:39,978 You doubted me. 569 00:26:40,061 --> 00:26:41,062 To think. 570 00:26:42,272 --> 00:26:46,568 I just spent three days locked in a dungeon with him. 571 00:26:46,777 --> 00:26:48,862 Okay. Yes, and that sucks. 572 00:26:48,945 --> 00:26:51,281 But we have a problem, possibly much bigger 573 00:26:51,364 --> 00:26:53,200 than sleeping beauty over here. 574 00:26:53,283 --> 00:26:54,284 The fairies are up to something 575 00:26:54,367 --> 00:26:55,368 in the Northern Orchards. 576 00:26:55,452 --> 00:26:57,329 They evacuated the villagers weeks ago 577 00:26:57,412 --> 00:26:59,664 and haven't let another human in since. 578 00:26:59,748 --> 00:27:02,959 Except Ess came through on his way from Loria, 579 00:27:03,043 --> 00:27:05,045 and he saw some crazy shit. 580 00:27:05,128 --> 00:27:07,464 Rivers running red, three-eyed fanged toads, 581 00:27:07,547 --> 00:27:10,425 mutant plant life, Chernobyl-level shit. 582 00:27:10,509 --> 00:27:13,428 I think the fairies might be poisoning the ecosystem. 583 00:27:13,512 --> 00:27:16,598 Great, well, now I can't be mad at you. 584 00:27:17,140 --> 00:27:18,266 Thanks. 585 00:27:18,767 --> 00:27:20,685 I know, I wanted to fight, too, 586 00:27:20,769 --> 00:27:22,813 so that we could make up and on the other side of it, 587 00:27:22,896 --> 00:27:25,065 we could just... Be us again? 588 00:27:25,732 --> 00:27:27,317 Who are we now, El? 589 00:27:27,400 --> 00:27:28,819 We used to be glamorous, 590 00:27:28,902 --> 00:27:30,821 amazing mega-bitches. 591 00:27:31,530 --> 00:27:32,906 And now? 592 00:27:33,156 --> 00:27:36,743 We have depth and character. 593 00:27:37,452 --> 00:27:40,413 Let's decide... We'll find us again 594 00:27:40,497 --> 00:27:42,833 once we're done saving Fillory. 595 00:27:42,916 --> 00:27:44,167 Okay? 596 00:27:45,168 --> 00:27:46,336 (HORSE NEIGHING) 597 00:27:46,419 --> 00:27:47,921 Duty calls. 598 00:27:48,004 --> 00:27:49,923 Let's go see about these orchards. 599 00:27:56,054 --> 00:27:57,722 Which are... 600 00:28:01,935 --> 00:28:03,603 No longer here. 601 00:28:11,027 --> 00:28:14,030 Nothing is going to save you. Not Brakebills. 602 00:28:14,114 --> 00:28:16,449 Not Fillory. Not a quest. 603 00:28:17,117 --> 00:28:18,326 Just do it. 604 00:28:19,911 --> 00:28:21,329 Kill yourself. 605 00:28:21,913 --> 00:28:23,665 Make it stop. 606 00:28:24,624 --> 00:28:26,376 You know the way out. 607 00:28:37,470 --> 00:28:38,972 BENEDICT: King Quentin, no! 608 00:28:39,639 --> 00:28:41,182 No, I wasn't. I was just... 609 00:28:41,516 --> 00:28:42,893 I thought I saw something. Your Majesty, 610 00:28:42,976 --> 00:28:45,312 if I may, I understand what you're contemplating. 611 00:28:45,729 --> 00:28:47,188 I thought about it too. 612 00:28:47,981 --> 00:28:50,901 Though I have never spoken about it, of course. 613 00:28:51,943 --> 00:28:52,986 Why not? 614 00:28:53,278 --> 00:28:56,489 Well, you know what parents teach you about emotions. 615 00:28:57,324 --> 00:29:01,703 That you should bottle them up and never talk about them 616 00:29:02,329 --> 00:29:05,999 and turn them into maps, for example. 617 00:29:06,124 --> 00:29:07,584 Jesus, Benedict. 618 00:29:08,335 --> 00:29:10,086 Okay, we should talk about this. 619 00:29:10,170 --> 00:29:12,088 If it please you, Sire, but first, 620 00:29:12,172 --> 00:29:14,257 why don't we step away from the edge of the boat? 621 00:29:17,177 --> 00:29:20,805 Yeah. I don't really trust myself right now. 622 00:29:21,348 --> 00:29:25,185 You know, in old days, when sailors would go mad, 623 00:29:25,477 --> 00:29:27,520 the crew would tie them to the mast. (CHUCKLES) 624 00:29:27,771 --> 00:29:28,980 Isn't that funny? 625 00:29:29,064 --> 00:29:30,565 Oh, my God. Tie me to the mast. 626 00:29:30,899 --> 00:29:31,983 (CHUCKLES) 627 00:29:34,194 --> 00:29:36,655 No... No, Your Majesty. No, do it. 628 00:29:37,197 --> 00:29:39,824 Okay, swear to me, no matter what I say, 629 00:29:39,908 --> 00:29:42,494 that you will not untie me until we get to Whitespire. 630 00:29:43,995 --> 00:29:46,873 Very well. I won't. 631 00:29:47,374 --> 00:29:48,750 Thank you. 632 00:30:16,736 --> 00:30:17,904 It worked. 633 00:30:20,407 --> 00:30:21,825 Thank you. 634 00:30:23,326 --> 00:30:24,911 (LAUGHS) 635 00:30:26,371 --> 00:30:27,622 (SIGHS) 636 00:31:12,792 --> 00:31:16,254 Oh, I see the transfer worked. 637 00:31:16,337 --> 00:31:19,424 It's still small, I can feel that, but I'm gonna grow it. 638 00:31:19,507 --> 00:31:21,009 I hope you'll be careful. 639 00:31:21,801 --> 00:31:22,802 I will be. 640 00:31:24,679 --> 00:31:28,308 You know that fixing my glasses 641 00:31:28,683 --> 00:31:29,893 won't fix me. 642 00:31:30,852 --> 00:31:32,687 Yeah, but they make all of this 643 00:31:32,771 --> 00:31:34,314 one speck less shitty. 644 00:31:39,986 --> 00:31:41,112 (MARGO GROANS) 645 00:31:42,447 --> 00:31:44,324 MARGO: It smells like the fairy realm. 646 00:31:46,076 --> 00:31:47,452 We're so far north. 647 00:31:47,702 --> 00:31:50,497 The climate should be cold and dry, not hot and moist. 648 00:31:50,580 --> 00:31:52,957 Yeah, well, they're such moisture freaks. 649 00:31:53,666 --> 00:31:56,377 All that spritzing and bathing. 650 00:31:56,711 --> 00:31:59,089 You know, it's... It's like they're afraid 651 00:31:59,172 --> 00:32:01,800 to dry out in Fillory or something. 652 00:32:04,094 --> 00:32:05,929 Oh, my God. 653 00:32:07,555 --> 00:32:10,225 The fuckers are terraforming. 654 00:32:10,517 --> 00:32:13,186 They're turning our kingdom into a mushroom steam bath. 655 00:32:13,269 --> 00:32:14,813 That is not okay. No. 656 00:32:15,021 --> 00:32:16,397 Definitely not. 657 00:32:18,650 --> 00:32:20,568 That mushroom just moved. 658 00:32:21,236 --> 00:32:23,154 Really? Should I pluck it? 659 00:32:25,824 --> 00:32:27,283 I'm gonna do it. 660 00:32:27,367 --> 00:32:29,077 Margo, don't. 661 00:32:35,792 --> 00:32:37,168 (GASPS) Oh. 662 00:32:40,004 --> 00:32:41,756 (WHIMPERS) Uh... 663 00:32:42,173 --> 00:32:44,342 It's a fairy embryo. 664 00:32:45,552 --> 00:32:47,720 Really? These are eggs, El. 665 00:32:48,054 --> 00:32:49,264 I mean, really? 666 00:32:49,347 --> 00:32:51,141 The fairies aren't just terraforming. 667 00:32:51,224 --> 00:32:53,309 They're growing an army. 668 00:32:53,393 --> 00:32:54,644 Oh, fuck. 669 00:32:57,605 --> 00:33:00,525 I think these fairies might actually qualify as Big Bads. 670 00:33:00,608 --> 00:33:02,819 I mean, think about all the crazy shit 671 00:33:02,902 --> 00:33:04,529 they've kept us busy with. 672 00:33:04,612 --> 00:33:08,158 Earthworms, adolescent slug mash, turtle semen. 673 00:33:08,241 --> 00:33:11,077 This is all just a thin frosting of whimsy 674 00:33:11,161 --> 00:33:14,080 on a cupcake of conspiracy. 675 00:33:14,289 --> 00:33:17,542 No, no, no, no, no, no. This is a full-scale invasion. 676 00:33:17,625 --> 00:33:20,211 We need a plan bigger than just assassinating the Queen. 677 00:33:20,295 --> 00:33:23,715 We need... We need... We need... We need... We need... 678 00:33:23,798 --> 00:33:26,718 We need... Margo? 679 00:33:28,469 --> 00:33:29,721 Margo? 680 00:33:30,847 --> 00:33:32,640 Kidnapping. Hostages. Leverage. 681 00:33:32,724 --> 00:33:35,393 Don't ask questions, go! Go! What the fuck? 682 00:33:35,476 --> 00:33:37,312 Go, go! 683 00:33:47,572 --> 00:33:48,948 It's a bitch, right? 684 00:33:49,574 --> 00:33:51,534 Imagine being stuck on a raft with that thing. 685 00:33:51,618 --> 00:33:53,244 Have you tried distracting it? 686 00:33:53,328 --> 00:33:56,039 For some reason, mine was really into seagulls. 687 00:33:56,289 --> 00:33:57,790 Wonder if that's because I'm into seagulls? 688 00:33:57,874 --> 00:33:59,584 Please, fuck off. 689 00:33:59,667 --> 00:34:01,753 Look, I'm sorry I passed you the key. 690 00:34:01,836 --> 00:34:03,338 I really thought you could handle it. 691 00:34:03,630 --> 00:34:05,423 This is me handling it. 692 00:34:05,506 --> 00:34:07,342 No, no, you're right. 693 00:34:08,509 --> 00:34:10,720 I wish we'd thought of tying ourselves up. 694 00:34:10,803 --> 00:34:13,139 That first day, we passed it around randomly. 695 00:34:13,223 --> 00:34:14,891 That killed three of us off quick. 696 00:34:15,016 --> 00:34:16,726 Called it Bloody Tuesday. 697 00:34:16,809 --> 00:34:18,770 We figured out it affects some people right away. 698 00:34:18,853 --> 00:34:21,397 Others, it takes time to wear down. 699 00:34:24,275 --> 00:34:25,610 You want me to take the key for a while? 700 00:34:25,693 --> 00:34:26,861 Give you some relief? 701 00:34:26,945 --> 00:34:28,238 No. 702 00:34:29,447 --> 00:34:31,616 I don't trust you not to pass it on to someone else. 703 00:34:31,908 --> 00:34:33,451 And I need it. 704 00:34:34,369 --> 00:34:35,995 For the quest. (EXHALES) Fine. 705 00:34:36,412 --> 00:34:37,956 Be a suffer-martyr. 706 00:34:38,581 --> 00:34:40,291 Look, the keys don't just make you suffer. 707 00:34:40,375 --> 00:34:41,793 They help sometimes, too. 708 00:34:42,418 --> 00:34:45,088 Like with the keyholes and shit like that. 709 00:34:45,630 --> 00:34:46,798 Keyholes, like... 710 00:34:47,048 --> 00:34:49,968 Like in the walls or clocks. 711 00:34:50,718 --> 00:34:52,262 Don't ask me how it works. 712 00:34:52,887 --> 00:34:55,265 So... So where do the keyholes go? 713 00:34:55,348 --> 00:34:58,851 To Earth or the Neither lands or wherever. 714 00:34:58,935 --> 00:35:01,271 Wait, wait. Are you serious? 715 00:35:06,734 --> 00:35:08,403 Stop it. What are you doing? 716 00:35:08,486 --> 00:35:09,696 I've been stuck here in Fillory this whole time 717 00:35:09,779 --> 00:35:10,989 when I could have gone home? 718 00:35:11,072 --> 00:35:13,658 Hey. No, Poppy, stop it. 719 00:35:13,741 --> 00:35:16,327 Poppy, no. Stop. 720 00:35:16,411 --> 00:35:17,829 Poppy! 721 00:35:18,746 --> 00:35:20,873 I told you you should've killed yourself. 722 00:35:20,957 --> 00:35:22,041 (EXHALES SHARPLY) 723 00:35:23,793 --> 00:35:24,919 Okay. 724 00:35:28,381 --> 00:35:30,675 Okay, we just have one outstanding problem. 725 00:35:31,092 --> 00:35:32,927 You kind of still need to fuck your husband. 726 00:35:33,011 --> 00:35:34,595 Don't worry. I got this. 727 00:35:37,765 --> 00:35:38,975 (CROAKING) 728 00:35:39,976 --> 00:35:44,105 Let's just say Ess was right about the toads in these parts. 729 00:35:44,439 --> 00:35:47,108 They've got three eyes? No, baby. 730 00:35:47,650 --> 00:35:49,152 They've got fangs. 731 00:35:51,863 --> 00:35:53,906 (FOMAR MOANING) 732 00:35:56,117 --> 00:35:58,786 Oh ! Oh, something bit my manhood. 733 00:35:58,870 --> 00:36:00,872 Congratulations, son. You just had sex. 734 00:36:00,955 --> 00:36:02,749 The first time's always painful. 735 00:36:02,832 --> 00:36:05,001 It's all those teeth they've got down there. 736 00:36:05,293 --> 00:36:08,588 But, hey, you were amazing. 737 00:36:09,547 --> 00:36:10,882 What? 738 00:36:10,965 --> 00:36:12,675 I like to watch. 739 00:36:14,344 --> 00:36:15,928 Wanna go again? 740 00:36:16,929 --> 00:36:17,972 Hmm? 741 00:36:18,806 --> 00:36:19,849 QUENTIN: Benedict! 742 00:36:23,811 --> 00:36:25,355 Benedict, help! 743 00:36:26,439 --> 00:36:27,690 Your Majesty? Oh, my God, Benedict. 744 00:36:27,774 --> 00:36:28,941 Okay, untie me. 745 00:36:29,025 --> 00:36:30,276 Sire, you said not to untie you. 746 00:36:30,360 --> 00:36:31,402 No. No, no, no, no, no. 747 00:36:31,486 --> 00:36:32,737 Please, come on. Okay, look. 748 00:36:32,820 --> 00:36:34,405 I'm not trying to kill myself. 749 00:36:34,489 --> 00:36:36,324 Poppy took the key, and she is trying 750 00:36:36,407 --> 00:36:37,742 to use it to get back to Earth. 751 00:36:37,825 --> 00:36:39,619 Just... Okay, go find her yourself. 752 00:36:39,702 --> 00:36:42,330 Just whatever you do, do not let her leave with that key. 753 00:36:42,413 --> 00:36:43,581 Yes, Your Majesty. 754 00:36:45,416 --> 00:36:46,751 God. 755 00:36:50,129 --> 00:36:51,714 No! Stop! 756 00:36:52,131 --> 00:36:53,424 (GRUNTING) 757 00:37:03,184 --> 00:37:04,644 Hey, did you get it? 758 00:37:04,727 --> 00:37:06,020 I'm sorry, Your Majesty. 759 00:37:07,939 --> 00:37:09,774 I'm a terrible failure. 760 00:37:10,358 --> 00:37:12,443 Okay. It's okay. 761 00:37:13,528 --> 00:37:15,113 We'll get the key back somehow. 762 00:37:23,037 --> 00:37:24,330 Benedict. 763 00:37:28,334 --> 00:37:30,211 Hey, hey. Benedict. 764 00:37:30,503 --> 00:37:32,130 Whoa, Benedict, no. Hey, listen. 765 00:37:32,213 --> 00:37:35,007 Whatever it's telling you to do, do not do it. 766 00:37:35,967 --> 00:37:37,301 I'm sorry. 767 00:37:38,469 --> 00:37:39,720 Benedict, no! 768 00:37:51,190 --> 00:37:53,234 Mmm. Yummy. 769 00:37:54,694 --> 00:37:55,736 Oh. 770 00:38:02,743 --> 00:38:04,245 (HUMMING) 771 00:38:07,373 --> 00:38:08,374 (MUSIC PLAYING) 772 00:38:08,458 --> 00:38:11,169 Oh, as long as I know how to love 773 00:38:11,252 --> 00:38:12,670 I know I'll stay alive 774 00:38:12,753 --> 00:38:14,547 I've got all my life to live 775 00:38:14,630 --> 00:38:16,632 I've got all my love to give 776 00:38:16,716 --> 00:38:20,386 And I'll survive, hey, hey 777 00:38:20,470 --> 00:38:22,138 Penny, what's wrong? 778 00:38:22,221 --> 00:38:24,182 Just saying goodbye. What? 779 00:38:24,640 --> 00:38:26,184 Goodbye? Where are you going? 780 00:38:26,767 --> 00:38:28,019 Just away. 781 00:38:28,144 --> 00:38:29,437 Away... Wait. 782 00:38:30,146 --> 00:38:33,608 Fuck, I hate this thing. Um, I don't understand. 783 00:38:33,691 --> 00:38:35,067 Is this because of what happened with Kady? 784 00:38:35,151 --> 00:38:36,569 No. Okay. 785 00:38:36,652 --> 00:38:37,904 Is it because we did the transfer? 786 00:38:37,987 --> 00:38:40,198 No. Look, I gotta go. 787 00:38:40,281 --> 00:38:41,824 Wait, will you just talk to me for a second? 788 00:38:41,908 --> 00:38:44,243 You know what, we barely know each other. 789 00:38:44,327 --> 00:38:47,121 Don't suddenly act like you care just 'cause I'm going. 790 00:38:47,205 --> 00:38:48,706 I'm not acting. 791 00:38:48,789 --> 00:38:50,041 I do care. I don't want to see you go. 792 00:38:50,124 --> 00:38:51,709 I don't want to see you give up. 793 00:38:51,792 --> 00:38:53,961 Give up? Yeah. 794 00:38:54,045 --> 00:38:57,381 You're the one who had magic, and you gave it away. 795 00:38:58,216 --> 00:39:01,052 What's your plan? Go back to law school? 796 00:39:01,135 --> 00:39:02,803 Live off your trust fund? 797 00:39:02,887 --> 00:39:05,473 Actually, no, my plan was to take five minutes 798 00:39:05,556 --> 00:39:07,934 and try to remember what life was like 799 00:39:08,017 --> 00:39:10,228 without a god or a quest. 800 00:39:10,311 --> 00:39:11,938 Or some dead asshole bothering me. 801 00:39:12,021 --> 00:39:13,648 And, I don't know, frankly beyond that, 802 00:39:13,731 --> 00:39:14,941 it's none of your business. 803 00:39:15,024 --> 00:39:17,777 'Cause you have nothing beyond that. 804 00:39:17,860 --> 00:39:19,070 (DOOR OPENS) 805 00:39:24,033 --> 00:39:25,618 Penny wants to say goodbye. 806 00:39:27,870 --> 00:39:30,957 You're leaving? I can't do this anymore. 807 00:39:32,041 --> 00:39:35,419 I can't be a ghost person in my own life, okay? 808 00:39:39,882 --> 00:39:41,842 Why don't I just make you a new body? 809 00:39:43,052 --> 00:39:44,512 Like Mayakovsky did for me. 810 00:39:50,560 --> 00:39:52,812 (DOG BARKING) (INDISTINCT CHATTER) 811 00:40:02,572 --> 00:40:03,698 (GASPS) 812 00:40:03,781 --> 00:40:05,908 A-plus job getting rid of me, gorgeous. 813 00:40:07,410 --> 00:40:08,828 Is this just a dream? 814 00:40:09,996 --> 00:40:12,915 That time you fell out of the tree when you were 12. 815 00:40:12,999 --> 00:40:17,003 The bone in your arm healed in six little weeks. 816 00:40:17,086 --> 00:40:19,463 How come your fear of heights never did? 817 00:40:24,927 --> 00:40:26,304 I'm not the bone. 818 00:40:27,888 --> 00:40:29,223 I'm the terror. 819 00:40:31,309 --> 00:40:33,644 I do love how you keep trying. 820 00:40:34,645 --> 00:40:36,147 And trying. 821 00:40:37,273 --> 00:40:41,027 And trying. And trying. 822 00:40:41,110 --> 00:40:42,278 (GASPS) 823 00:40:47,783 --> 00:40:49,160 (GRUNTS) I have not been punched 824 00:40:49,243 --> 00:40:50,620 that hard since Burning Man. 825 00:40:50,703 --> 00:40:53,456 Where is he? Where did he go? 826 00:40:55,124 --> 00:40:56,917 Why does it smell like barbeque? 827 00:41:00,338 --> 00:41:03,215 Benedict is dead, and best-case scenario, 828 00:41:03,299 --> 00:41:04,717 the dragon shits the key into the bottom of the ocean. 829 00:41:04,800 --> 00:41:06,844 Um, Quentin. Don't talk to me. 830 00:41:06,927 --> 00:41:08,888 Please, I mean it. Okay. 831 00:41:08,971 --> 00:41:10,890 Just... (CLEARS THROAT) Just one thing 832 00:41:10,973 --> 00:41:12,600 and I swear I will never talk to you again. 833 00:41:12,683 --> 00:41:13,726 What? 834 00:41:13,809 --> 00:41:15,770 Dragons don't shit. 835 00:41:15,853 --> 00:41:17,813 Okay, great, fun fact. Thanks. 836 00:41:17,897 --> 00:41:19,357 No one knows exactly how it works, 837 00:41:19,440 --> 00:41:22,068 but what they ingest goes elsewhere. 838 00:41:22,151 --> 00:41:23,778 They're gatekeepers, you know? 839 00:41:23,861 --> 00:41:25,404 They don't just make portals. 840 00:41:25,488 --> 00:41:26,864 They are portals. 841 00:41:27,490 --> 00:41:30,660 So, actual best-case scenario... 842 00:41:30,993 --> 00:41:32,620 The key went to the Underworld. 843 00:41:33,746 --> 00:41:34,789 Mmm. 844 00:41:34,872 --> 00:41:36,207 Oh, my God. 845 00:41:43,214 --> 00:41:44,799 If you're here, I'm practicing 846 00:41:44,882 --> 00:41:47,134 an Osseus Confervium. Bone-knitting. 847 00:41:47,218 --> 00:41:48,969 First step to building a new body. 848 00:41:49,387 --> 00:41:52,223 I know you can't see me, but I'm here. 849 00:41:53,849 --> 00:41:55,309 Thanks for giving a shit about me. 850 00:42:00,773 --> 00:42:01,982 Alice? 851 00:42:02,274 --> 00:42:03,275 (BREATHING SHAKILY) 852 00:42:03,359 --> 00:42:05,444 Alice, you okay? Alice? 853 00:42:06,028 --> 00:42:08,239 God, Alice. Alice! 854 00:42:08,447 --> 00:42:10,950 God, this is... Where's... 855 00:42:11,826 --> 00:42:12,868 Alice! 856 00:42:14,203 --> 00:42:15,496 (BREATHES HEAVILY) 857 00:42:16,831 --> 00:42:20,042 Okay, okay, God. Come on. 858 00:42:20,876 --> 00:42:24,213 Come on, someone's got to hear this, please. 859 00:42:28,050 --> 00:42:29,051 (MUSIC PLAYING) 860 00:42:29,135 --> 00:42:31,470 Oh, as long as I know how to love 861 00:42:31,554 --> 00:42:33,222 I know I'll stay alive 862 00:42:33,305 --> 00:42:35,182 I've got all my life to live 863 00:42:35,266 --> 00:42:37,309 I've got all my love to give 864 00:42:37,393 --> 00:42:40,187 And I'll survive, hey, hey 865 00:42:55,828 --> 00:42:59,415 It took all the strength I had not to fall apart 866 00:42:59,498 --> 00:43:03,252 Kept trying hard to mend the pieces of my broken heart 867 00:43:03,276 --> 00:43:08,276 http://hiqve.com/ 60524

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