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QUENTIN: Previously on
The Magicians...
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JULIA: We found a key, too.
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00:00:04,050 --> 00:00:06,178
The ghost said
it has the power
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00:00:06,261 --> 00:00:07,387
to reveal things
that are hidden.
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00:00:07,470 --> 00:00:08,638
I'm a hidden thing.
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00:00:08,722 --> 00:00:09,973
I'm Hyman.
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00:00:10,056 --> 00:00:11,391
When I first got stuck
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00:00:11,474 --> 00:00:13,268
in the astral plane,
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00:00:13,351 --> 00:00:15,729
I spent months
trying to push things.
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00:00:15,812 --> 00:00:16,980
I never got anywhere.
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00:00:17,063 --> 00:00:19,399
Until I tried
being the thing.
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00:00:19,691 --> 00:00:21,401
Holy zerts! You did it!
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00:00:21,651 --> 00:00:23,069
The farmers are hesitant
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because you're asking them
to throw out food
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00:00:25,238 --> 00:00:28,074
and replace it with, uh...
MARGO: Inedible mushrooms.
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I got it.
I just need it done.
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00:00:31,036 --> 00:00:33,663
On Earth we tend to meet the
people we're gonna marry first.
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00:00:33,747 --> 00:00:36,499
FAIRY QUEEN: Surely you've heard
of the Tribe of The Floating Mountain.
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00:00:37,918 --> 00:00:39,169
(BLADE SLICES)
(GASPS)
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00:00:39,336 --> 00:00:41,254
FOMAR:
It is my duty and honor
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to take the place
of my late brother.
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ALICE: Why do you have magic?
JULIA: I don't know.
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00:00:45,675 --> 00:00:47,177
I'd do anything
to get it back.
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If I could give it to you,
I would.
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00:00:49,846 --> 00:00:51,306
What if you could?
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Whoo. Sorry.
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00:01:01,441 --> 00:01:02,609
Okay.
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00:01:06,696 --> 00:01:08,615
ALICE: Last I checked,
we're looking for a spell,
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not starting an eBay store.
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There's this old hedge story
I once heard
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00:01:13,495 --> 00:01:15,538
about some sort
of electrical transfer
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Marina used to steal magic
from some poor faun.
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00:01:19,125 --> 00:01:20,543
People still talk about it.
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00:01:21,670 --> 00:01:23,213
Just look.
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00:01:26,508 --> 00:01:28,301
So, you want us
to reverse engineer
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00:01:28,385 --> 00:01:30,804
a hedge witch urban legend
using kids' toys?
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00:01:30,887 --> 00:01:33,181
I mean, aluminum wiring's
been scant since the '90s,
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00:01:33,265 --> 00:01:35,141
so unless you have
a better idea...
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00:01:42,399 --> 00:01:43,984
(MURMURING IN FARSI)
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Do you feel anything?
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No.
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00:02:01,584 --> 00:02:02,794
Go again?
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00:02:06,589 --> 00:02:07,590
(MUSIC PLAYING)
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00:02:07,674 --> 00:02:09,342
Oh, as long as I know
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00:02:09,426 --> 00:02:11,052
How to love
I know I'll stay alive
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Why did that just turn on
by itself?
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Oh, my God.
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00:02:14,514 --> 00:02:15,724
I've got all my love to give
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And I'll survive
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Give me your hand.
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00:02:20,145 --> 00:02:21,813
Wait. Stop.
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00:02:22,147 --> 00:02:23,565
Do not do this.
53
00:02:23,940 --> 00:02:25,483
Did you just use
that fish as a doorbell?
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00:02:25,567 --> 00:02:27,152
I've been trying to warn you
guys for, like, an hour.
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Being the fish button is the first
thing in this entire room that's worked.
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00:02:30,322 --> 00:02:31,406
What are you trying
to warn us about?
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This spell.
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00:02:32,907 --> 00:02:34,159
I've seen it in person.
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00:02:34,242 --> 00:02:35,410
JULIA: Are you serious?
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00:02:35,910 --> 00:02:37,120
Yeah.
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00:02:37,746 --> 00:02:39,706
Couple months back
on a book-stealing job,
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00:02:39,789 --> 00:02:41,791
I saw a group of
magically-starved idiots
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00:02:42,167 --> 00:02:44,711
do the transfer,
and by the end of it,
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00:02:44,794 --> 00:02:46,755
everyone was on fire.
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00:02:47,964 --> 00:02:49,549
Trust me.
Fogg was right.
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00:02:49,632 --> 00:02:51,593
It's a bad idea.
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00:02:52,927 --> 00:02:55,388
Wait a minute. Did you
just say Fogg was right?
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00:02:55,555 --> 00:02:56,556
Oh...
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00:02:56,639 --> 00:02:57,766
Fuck me.
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00:02:57,849 --> 00:02:59,392
You have magic.
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00:02:59,601 --> 00:03:00,852
And you're just now
telling me?
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00:03:00,935 --> 00:03:03,396
Don't take this
the wrong way,
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00:03:03,480 --> 00:03:05,732
but you've been
a little drunk.
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00:03:05,815 --> 00:03:07,942
And unreliable.
Yes.
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00:03:08,193 --> 00:03:12,489
I'm drunk, but I am
entirely reliable.
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00:03:15,617 --> 00:03:17,952
Um, maybe we should get back
to Marina's spell.
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00:03:18,119 --> 00:03:20,163
It wasn't Marina's spell.
It's mine.
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00:03:20,246 --> 00:03:22,457
She stole it from
my private collection.
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00:03:23,333 --> 00:03:25,627
And if any of you had attended
my annual colloquia
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00:03:25,710 --> 00:03:28,129
on prohibited magic,
you would know
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00:03:28,213 --> 00:03:30,632
that its proper name
is the Voltaic Transfer.
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00:03:30,715 --> 00:03:32,717
It is incredibly delicate.
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00:03:32,801 --> 00:03:34,636
We know that, but...
But what?
84
00:03:34,719 --> 00:03:36,304
But you want to rid yourself
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00:03:36,388 --> 00:03:38,807
of the one thing
we all so desperately want?
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00:03:38,890 --> 00:03:40,225
If you understood what...
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00:03:40,308 --> 00:03:41,309
You understand.
88
00:03:42,060 --> 00:03:43,812
I'm a Magician with no magic.
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00:03:44,229 --> 00:03:46,439
A dean without a school.
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00:03:46,731 --> 00:03:48,942
Just a blind, unemployed
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00:03:49,025 --> 00:03:51,194
black man in America.
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00:03:52,153 --> 00:03:57,242
Which, shockingly, was actually
being kept 38% more tolerant
93
00:03:57,325 --> 00:03:59,411
through a series
of enchantments
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00:03:59,494 --> 00:04:01,413
which have now died.
95
00:04:01,496 --> 00:04:03,623
In case you hadn't noticed
or perhaps maybe you weren't
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00:04:03,706 --> 00:04:05,542
in a position to need to.
Okay, you're really drunk.
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00:04:05,667 --> 00:04:06,668
(LOUDLY) So what?
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00:04:08,461 --> 00:04:10,296
What does it matter?
99
00:04:10,922 --> 00:04:12,799
Alice, of all people,
you should know better
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00:04:12,882 --> 00:04:14,467
than to attempt this.
101
00:04:14,551 --> 00:04:16,970
You want to blow yourselves
up? Is that it? (SNICKERS)
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00:04:20,723 --> 00:04:23,268
JULIA: Um...
Just give me one second.
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00:04:26,104 --> 00:04:27,355
Okay.
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00:04:28,106 --> 00:04:29,357
(EXHALES DEEPLY)
105
00:04:54,340 --> 00:04:55,800
Uh, they'll hold
for a day or two,
106
00:04:55,884 --> 00:04:57,719
but then Alice
can recharge them.
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00:04:58,970 --> 00:05:01,222
After we finish the transfer.
108
00:05:01,639 --> 00:05:04,434
I know.
Everything is fucked.
109
00:05:04,809 --> 00:05:07,270
I'm sorry.
It's not your fault.
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00:05:07,812 --> 00:05:08,938
Julia.
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00:05:09,022 --> 00:05:11,566
Yeah, well, it's not
not my fault either, so...
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00:05:11,649 --> 00:05:14,611
What you two
utter idiots need,
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00:05:14,694 --> 00:05:16,029
if you don't want to die,
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00:05:16,196 --> 00:05:18,406
is the flesh
of a magical creature
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00:05:18,490 --> 00:05:21,576
to act as a sort of
semiconductor.
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00:05:21,659 --> 00:05:25,371
A potent energy-drainer.
An incubus.
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00:05:30,084 --> 00:05:31,419
MARGO:
If this is about the whole
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00:05:31,503 --> 00:05:32,795
marriage not being
consummated yet,
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00:05:32,879 --> 00:05:34,881
don't worry, it'll happen.
120
00:05:35,006 --> 00:05:37,133
Oh, no, no, no. You
misunderstand me, my dear.
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00:05:37,675 --> 00:05:39,719
See, I've heard a rumor
about your adviser,
122
00:05:39,886 --> 00:05:42,555
the Pickwick?
Sighted in a certain corridor,
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00:05:42,639 --> 00:05:44,307
taking scrapings
from the wall.
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00:05:44,390 --> 00:05:46,184
He's just a compulsive
redecorator.
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00:05:46,351 --> 00:05:48,770
You might be interested to
know that we both have been
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00:05:48,853 --> 00:05:51,439
plotting against
our mutual friend.
127
00:05:51,689 --> 00:05:52,815
Hmm.
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00:05:52,941 --> 00:05:55,568
No idea what
you're talking about.
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00:05:56,778 --> 00:05:58,238
Margo.
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00:05:58,404 --> 00:05:59,781
You can trust me.
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00:05:59,864 --> 00:06:01,741
The misguided actions
of my son
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00:06:01,824 --> 00:06:05,495
have soured both sides
of our arrangement.
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00:06:05,578 --> 00:06:09,582
I've acquired a weapon forged
in the foundries of Stonehaven.
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00:06:10,583 --> 00:06:12,126
When the time is right,
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00:06:12,210 --> 00:06:14,712
we could use it to kill
the Fairy Queen.
136
00:06:19,509 --> 00:06:22,303
Hi.
Oh, hell, no.
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00:06:22,595 --> 00:06:24,097
Move.
138
00:06:24,180 --> 00:06:26,641
Hang your sheets out
the window afterwards, dear.
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00:06:26,724 --> 00:06:28,685
Guards! Guards!
140
00:06:28,768 --> 00:06:30,812
Don't even think about
closing it. No!
141
00:06:30,895 --> 00:06:33,147
Guards!
142
00:06:34,857 --> 00:06:35,942
(BANGING ON DOOR)
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00:06:36,025 --> 00:06:37,068
Let me out!
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00:06:38,903 --> 00:06:40,905
(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)
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00:06:48,705 --> 00:06:48,871
MAN: I don't give a shit
if you have to find someone
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00:06:48,871 --> 00:06:50,665
MAN: I don't give a shit
if you have to find someone
147
00:06:50,748 --> 00:06:52,125
to sell those shares short.
148
00:06:52,208 --> 00:06:53,876
I need them today.
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00:06:54,919 --> 00:06:56,546
So the incubus
is a hedge fund manager?
150
00:06:56,963 --> 00:06:58,006
Plus 5%.
151
00:06:58,089 --> 00:07:00,008
And not one more cent,
you piece of monkey shit.
152
00:07:00,091 --> 00:07:01,718
Just remember
what Fogg said.
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00:07:02,552 --> 00:07:03,886
Be respectful,
no matter what.
154
00:07:04,596 --> 00:07:05,888
You got two minutes.
155
00:07:06,055 --> 00:07:08,474
Henry Fogg said
that you might be able
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00:07:08,558 --> 00:07:10,018
to help us power our spell.
157
00:07:10,518 --> 00:07:13,771
Uh... We just... We need
to use your thing.
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00:07:13,980 --> 00:07:16,524
My what?
Your... Your thing.
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00:07:16,608 --> 00:07:18,776
Your... Your business.
160
00:07:19,110 --> 00:07:20,445
Sorry?
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00:07:20,862 --> 00:07:23,656
Your little friend.
Uh, I mean... Your big friend.
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00:07:24,574 --> 00:07:26,576
Well, I'm sure your friend
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00:07:26,659 --> 00:07:28,703
is perfectly proportioned
to your body.
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00:07:28,786 --> 00:07:32,081
I was just saying...
Your penis.
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00:07:32,832 --> 00:07:36,544
Yep, we need to use your penis
to power our spell.
166
00:07:36,628 --> 00:07:38,421
And we know that
you need it too.
167
00:07:38,504 --> 00:07:40,590
So that's why we'll build
the spell around it.
168
00:07:40,673 --> 00:07:42,008
It'll be completely painless
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00:07:42,091 --> 00:07:43,718
and should only take
a couple minutes.
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00:07:48,389 --> 00:07:50,308
(LAUGHS)
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00:07:56,272 --> 00:07:58,650
I can't believe
that actually worked!
172
00:07:58,733 --> 00:08:00,652
Wha... What actually worked?
173
00:08:00,818 --> 00:08:03,529
I planted this joke on Fogg
25 years ago.
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00:08:03,613 --> 00:08:05,823
I had him totally convinced
that I had a magic Johnson.
175
00:08:05,907 --> 00:08:07,909
Wait, so you...
You don't have a magic...
176
00:08:07,992 --> 00:08:09,160
Of course not.
177
00:08:09,327 --> 00:08:10,745
That's ridiculous.
No, it's not.
178
00:08:10,828 --> 00:08:12,580
I mean, you're an incubus.
179
00:08:12,664 --> 00:08:14,957
Isn't sex, like, your thing?
180
00:08:15,375 --> 00:08:16,876
Gods no.
181
00:08:17,085 --> 00:08:18,753
I don't even like sex.
182
00:08:18,836 --> 00:08:22,799
Stress is a much better way
to drain people's energy.
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00:08:22,882 --> 00:08:24,050
May I?
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00:08:24,967 --> 00:08:26,094
(SNIFFS)
185
00:08:28,638 --> 00:08:29,972
(EXHALES LOUDLY)
186
00:08:30,223 --> 00:08:31,391
(CHUCKLES)
187
00:08:31,474 --> 00:08:33,142
Oh, and you.
188
00:08:33,226 --> 00:08:35,687
You got a lot of it,
I can tell.
189
00:08:35,895 --> 00:08:37,230
(SNIFFS)
190
00:08:38,314 --> 00:08:39,607
(EXHALES)
191
00:08:39,691 --> 00:08:41,275
Delish.
192
00:08:42,026 --> 00:08:44,570
(SNIFFLES) You give me
a few more hits of this,
193
00:08:44,654 --> 00:08:45,905
and I'll give you something
194
00:08:45,988 --> 00:08:48,199
that'll actually
power your spell.
195
00:08:55,331 --> 00:08:57,792
Is that your tail?
Yeah.
196
00:08:57,875 --> 00:08:59,627
Yeah, I grow
a new one every spring.
197
00:09:02,755 --> 00:09:04,132
Welcome back.
198
00:09:04,215 --> 00:09:06,926
I see you've misplaced
your wife and child.
199
00:09:07,009 --> 00:09:10,304
You'd be shocked how easy
it is to misplace people
200
00:09:10,388 --> 00:09:13,641
when your mind's on
tax collection and annexation
201
00:09:13,725 --> 00:09:16,853
and unforeseen
seafaring confusion.
202
00:09:19,188 --> 00:09:20,857
I'll immediately sail
back out there and find them,
203
00:09:20,982 --> 00:09:22,650
of course...
No, you won't.
204
00:09:22,734 --> 00:09:25,153
I have a bigger problem
I need you to solve.
205
00:09:25,570 --> 00:09:27,155
The Stone Queen has locked
206
00:09:27,238 --> 00:09:29,073
Margo and Fomar
in the dungeon.
207
00:09:29,699 --> 00:09:31,242
Wait. What? Why?
208
00:09:31,325 --> 00:09:34,078
She thinks it will get
the marriage consummated,
209
00:09:35,163 --> 00:09:37,874
but ultimately I need
the union officialized
210
00:09:37,957 --> 00:09:39,667
just as much
as the Floaters do.
211
00:09:39,959 --> 00:09:41,461
Listen, pro tip.
212
00:09:41,627 --> 00:09:43,671
Let Margo
out of there immediately.
213
00:09:43,755 --> 00:09:45,840
You know her.
Force isn't going to work.
214
00:09:45,923 --> 00:09:48,885
True. Force may not work.
215
00:09:49,177 --> 00:09:52,096
But the clever coercion on
the part of a trusted friend.
216
00:09:52,180 --> 00:09:53,681
I am not going
to coerce Margo
217
00:09:53,765 --> 00:09:55,641
into having sex
with a 15-year-old.
218
00:09:55,725 --> 00:09:57,351
Have you never heard
of statutory rape?
219
00:09:57,435 --> 00:10:00,313
Fomar isn't a statue.
That is not what...
220
00:10:01,522 --> 00:10:04,192
Forget it. You will solve
this problem for me.
221
00:10:05,026 --> 00:10:06,110
And if I refuse?
222
00:10:09,655 --> 00:10:12,325
I've been searching
for a new keepsake.
223
00:10:13,534 --> 00:10:15,119
Several bits will do.
224
00:10:15,328 --> 00:10:18,331
Fine, but I have
a feeling Queen Margo
225
00:10:18,456 --> 00:10:20,333
is going to be
a little bit difficult.
226
00:10:22,168 --> 00:10:23,336
FOMAR: I know!
227
00:10:23,419 --> 00:10:25,213
You hate me
for killing Micah.
228
00:10:25,296 --> 00:10:27,089
Oh, Jesus Christ.
229
00:10:27,465 --> 00:10:28,758
It's just, in our culture,
230
00:10:28,841 --> 00:10:31,969
younger sons can't marry
or inherit property.
231
00:10:32,053 --> 00:10:33,888
Most of us wind up
232
00:10:33,971 --> 00:10:36,808
serving in the Crag Guard
or dying in battle.
233
00:10:36,891 --> 00:10:38,893
Is this supposed to make me
feel bad for you?
234
00:10:39,101 --> 00:10:40,102
No.
235
00:10:40,937 --> 00:10:42,146
So, do you want
to take a break?
236
00:10:42,563 --> 00:10:43,981
Let me touch
your maiden peaks?
237
00:10:44,106 --> 00:10:45,900
Do you want me to cut your
hands off and have them made
238
00:10:45,983 --> 00:10:47,360
into a decorative,
whimsical planter?
239
00:10:47,443 --> 00:10:50,029
How are we supposed
to become one flesh
240
00:10:50,112 --> 00:10:52,031
if you won't let me
touch you?
241
00:10:52,323 --> 00:10:53,908
We're not.
But you're my wife.
242
00:10:54,158 --> 00:10:55,493
Oh, please.
243
00:10:55,910 --> 00:10:57,119
You don't need a wife.
244
00:10:57,620 --> 00:11:00,081
You need a pile of socks
and a sex-ed class.
245
00:11:00,164 --> 00:11:03,292
What's a sex class?
Who's Ed?
246
00:11:03,376 --> 00:11:04,752
It's something they make you
do on Earth.
247
00:11:04,836 --> 00:11:06,087
It makes you never wanna.
248
00:11:08,381 --> 00:11:09,966
How about I show you?
249
00:11:16,848 --> 00:11:18,099
Vaginas.
250
00:11:18,182 --> 00:11:20,601
The leading cause
of death in men.
251
00:11:21,185 --> 00:11:22,687
They spread disease.
252
00:11:23,354 --> 00:11:25,898
They explode
during childbirth.
253
00:11:27,024 --> 00:11:30,236
But worst of all, they bleed.
Every month.
254
00:11:30,528 --> 00:11:32,446
In fact, mine's doing it
right now.
255
00:11:33,197 --> 00:11:36,033
Well, that's okay.
I like blood.
256
00:11:39,203 --> 00:11:41,038
But do you like teeth?
257
00:11:44,458 --> 00:11:46,168
(EXHALES) Sorry I'm late.
258
00:11:46,544 --> 00:11:47,587
You okay?
259
00:11:48,212 --> 00:11:50,131
Enjoying being a palace guard
in your own palace?
260
00:11:50,214 --> 00:11:52,216
This uniform is, like,
really sweaty.
261
00:11:52,300 --> 00:11:54,302
Yeah, I know, but it beats
262
00:11:54,385 --> 00:11:56,220
having the Fairy Queen's
hand up your ass.
263
00:11:56,304 --> 00:11:58,347
Last thing we need
is another puppet king.
264
00:11:59,098 --> 00:12:01,100
Okay, key quest. Hit me.
265
00:12:01,934 --> 00:12:04,020
Uh, okay, so
I'm pretty sure that
266
00:12:04,145 --> 00:12:05,813
the fourth key is somewhere
267
00:12:05,897 --> 00:12:08,399
in this stretch of ocean
called The Abyss.
268
00:12:08,482 --> 00:12:10,401
Um, it's an uncharted
region of Fillory
269
00:12:10,526 --> 00:12:13,821
where it's, like,
sort of permanently night.
270
00:12:13,946 --> 00:12:15,031
Um...
271
00:12:15,114 --> 00:12:17,491
But, you know,
we get to go
272
00:12:17,575 --> 00:12:21,913
on a quest on a magical boat,
so it doesn't totally suck.
273
00:12:21,996 --> 00:12:24,790
Yeah. I wish I could.
274
00:12:25,082 --> 00:12:27,919
Believe me, but duty calls
a dozen different ways.
275
00:12:28,002 --> 00:12:30,296
And I can't leave Margo.
Right, of course.
276
00:12:30,379 --> 00:12:32,340
Sorry.
No.
277
00:12:32,423 --> 00:12:34,884
I was looking forward to going
on a boating quest with you.
278
00:12:34,967 --> 00:12:36,510
Who wouldn't?
279
00:12:38,846 --> 00:12:40,848
Think about it.
You can take Benedict.
280
00:12:41,223 --> 00:12:43,351
Go be life partners with
someone else for a little bit.
281
00:12:43,434 --> 00:12:46,771
But you'll be able to do the...
Thing on the prow of a ship
282
00:12:46,854 --> 00:12:48,314
you've been waiting
your whole life to do.
283
00:12:48,397 --> 00:12:51,442
What thing?
You know, the thing.
284
00:13:05,915 --> 00:13:07,917
Whoo!
285
00:13:10,920 --> 00:13:13,589
(IMITATES BLADE SWISHING)
286
00:13:14,882 --> 00:13:16,968
Sorry. Sorry.
287
00:13:26,560 --> 00:13:28,145
Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
288
00:13:43,411 --> 00:13:46,622
QUENTIN: Being on a mission
is a hell of an antidepressant.
289
00:13:46,706 --> 00:13:48,082
You notice that, Benedict?
290
00:13:48,165 --> 00:13:49,917
Well, now that
you mention it.
291
00:13:52,128 --> 00:13:53,421
Whoa.
292
00:13:53,504 --> 00:13:55,214
BENEDICT: We're entering
The Abyss, Sire.
293
00:13:58,384 --> 00:14:01,220
It'll be darkness
from here on.
294
00:14:04,473 --> 00:14:06,267
Thank you.
295
00:14:17,570 --> 00:14:19,905
So how long
until we can keep going?
296
00:14:19,989 --> 00:14:22,324
As soon as we find
safe passage, Your Majesty.
297
00:14:22,658 --> 00:14:24,452
WOMAN:
ls someone out there?
298
00:14:24,535 --> 00:14:26,203
Help!
299
00:14:28,080 --> 00:14:31,208
Is someone out there?
Help!
300
00:14:35,629 --> 00:14:38,257
God, I think there's someone
out there on a raft.
301
00:14:39,050 --> 00:14:40,426
(GRUNTING)
302
00:14:44,638 --> 00:14:45,890
(SIGHS)
303
00:14:46,015 --> 00:14:47,058
You okay?
304
00:14:47,141 --> 00:14:51,103
Wow, wow, wow. You just saved
the shit out of me. (SIGHS)
305
00:14:51,353 --> 00:14:52,563
Poppy Kline.
306
00:14:52,646 --> 00:14:55,107
Draconologist, postgraduate
fellow, and field researcher
307
00:14:55,191 --> 00:14:56,442
at your service.
308
00:14:57,234 --> 00:15:00,488
Holy shit.
You're from Brakebills?
309
00:15:01,614 --> 00:15:02,948
Yeah.
310
00:15:09,705 --> 00:15:11,749
So, Brakebills students
are kings and queens now?
311
00:15:11,832 --> 00:15:12,875
Yeah.
Shit.
312
00:15:12,958 --> 00:15:14,919
I've been stuck in The Abyss
way too long.
313
00:15:15,002 --> 00:15:16,170
How did you end up
out here anyway?
314
00:15:16,253 --> 00:15:17,546
I came
with some other students.
315
00:15:17,880 --> 00:15:20,549
Oh, hey, sorry.
I can... Uh...
316
00:15:20,633 --> 00:15:22,885
Spring Break, Class of 2016?
317
00:15:23,219 --> 00:15:24,428
Didn't turn out
so well for us,
318
00:15:24,512 --> 00:15:26,263
but that is a whole
'nother story.
319
00:15:26,806 --> 00:15:27,807
Wait, sorry.
320
00:15:27,932 --> 00:15:29,225
Do you know, um...
321
00:15:29,308 --> 00:15:30,726
If the next two words
out of your mouth are "Josh"
322
00:15:30,810 --> 00:15:33,020
and "Hoberman,"
we just became best friends.
323
00:15:33,104 --> 00:15:35,106
No way. He's still alive?
324
00:15:35,439 --> 00:15:37,650
I mean, as far as I know.
325
00:15:37,733 --> 00:15:39,026
Oh, that's amazing.
326
00:15:39,110 --> 00:15:40,736
So how does
a Brakebills student
327
00:15:40,820 --> 00:15:43,072
wind up alone on a raft?
328
00:15:43,405 --> 00:15:46,242
Get a girl a drink.
I'll tell you the whole story.
329
00:15:46,325 --> 00:15:47,535
All right.
330
00:15:51,122 --> 00:15:52,456
(DRINK POURING)
331
00:16:01,298 --> 00:16:03,092
(CLEARS THROAT)
Your Majesty.
332
00:16:03,175 --> 00:16:05,302
An urgent message
from Prince Ess of Loria.
333
00:16:05,386 --> 00:16:07,054
Wasn't Ess in the dungeon?
334
00:16:07,138 --> 00:16:08,347
High Queen Margo let him go
335
00:16:08,430 --> 00:16:09,723
as he was innocent
of all charges.
336
00:16:10,057 --> 00:16:11,934
Oh, right. Yeah.
337
00:16:13,352 --> 00:16:14,603
Sorry about that.
338
00:16:19,608 --> 00:16:24,155
I figured out the problem.
Humans don't mate in captivity.
339
00:16:24,238 --> 00:16:27,032
What Margo and Fomar
need is a honeymoon.
340
00:16:27,283 --> 00:16:29,285
An hour's ride north,
there is a forest
341
00:16:29,368 --> 00:16:31,412
with naturally-occurring
aphrodisiacs
342
00:16:31,495 --> 00:16:34,206
that's guaranteed to get
that marriage consummated.
343
00:16:34,415 --> 00:16:36,208
(SIGHS) Fine.
344
00:16:36,458 --> 00:16:38,127
But if you fail...
I know, I know.
345
00:16:38,210 --> 00:16:40,504
New keepsakes.
Fingers, ears.
346
00:16:40,588 --> 00:16:42,506
Try your spleen.
347
00:16:42,590 --> 00:16:44,508
Okay.
Go.
348
00:16:45,885 --> 00:16:48,554
Fieldwork was my thing at
Brakebills, and well, dragons.
349
00:16:48,637 --> 00:16:50,139
Love them.
350
00:16:50,222 --> 00:16:52,057
Wait, so what happened
to your ship?
351
00:16:52,433 --> 00:16:54,059
Oh. Wrecked.
352
00:16:54,185 --> 00:16:55,311
Off the coast
of the Truth waters.
353
00:16:55,394 --> 00:16:58,147
I spent two years
on that little picket.
354
00:16:58,230 --> 00:17:01,025
And, bam.
Over in an instant.
355
00:17:02,109 --> 00:17:03,444
That was three weeks ago.
356
00:17:04,195 --> 00:17:07,781
You survived for three weeks
on a raft by yourself?
357
00:17:08,115 --> 00:17:09,825
Yeah, it was rough.
358
00:17:10,951 --> 00:17:12,244
Especially without magic.
359
00:17:12,328 --> 00:17:13,537
Do you know anything
about why the hell
360
00:17:13,621 --> 00:17:16,123
it just went out?
I mean...
361
00:17:16,207 --> 00:17:18,334
I just hope
someone's fixing it.
362
00:17:18,417 --> 00:17:21,128
That someone is, um,
sort of me.
363
00:17:22,546 --> 00:17:26,800
I'm on a quest, right,
for these golden keys.
364
00:17:26,884 --> 00:17:28,260
Right, so there's
seven of them.
365
00:17:28,344 --> 00:17:31,222
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
Golden keys?
366
00:17:31,513 --> 00:17:32,806
Like...
367
00:17:36,268 --> 00:17:37,519
Holy shit. How did you...
368
00:17:37,603 --> 00:17:38,604
Short version?
369
00:17:38,896 --> 00:17:40,064
Stole it.
370
00:17:40,397 --> 00:17:42,524
Mid-voyage we wound up
on this random island,
371
00:17:42,608 --> 00:17:45,110
just, like,
covered in treasure.
372
00:17:45,194 --> 00:17:46,362
A dragon breeding ground
which is like...
373
00:17:46,737 --> 00:17:48,197
Ah. Spontaneous orgasm.
374
00:17:48,572 --> 00:17:50,491
I mean, places like this
are so rare.
375
00:17:50,574 --> 00:17:52,201
There are only
two species of dragon
376
00:17:52,284 --> 00:17:53,494
that even build
treasure-nests.
377
00:17:53,577 --> 00:17:55,704
Anyway, this was
in one of them
378
00:17:55,788 --> 00:17:57,539
with a bunch of cool stuff.
379
00:17:57,623 --> 00:18:00,251
But the thing
that got me was
380
00:18:00,334 --> 00:18:01,835
I could feel something
coming off it.
381
00:18:01,919 --> 00:18:04,213
Yeah.
Even now.
382
00:18:04,296 --> 00:18:06,423
It's somehow
not dead, right?
383
00:18:07,174 --> 00:18:09,551
And, you know, the dragons
were all horny and distracted,
384
00:18:09,635 --> 00:18:11,220
so I just took it.
385
00:18:11,887 --> 00:18:13,055
Just like that?
386
00:18:13,389 --> 00:18:16,267
I'm a person of questionable
ethics. (CHUCKLES)
387
00:18:17,184 --> 00:18:18,227
Here.
388
00:18:19,353 --> 00:18:22,606
It's yours,
from one quester to another.
389
00:18:24,441 --> 00:18:25,734
Wow. Thank you.
390
00:18:26,652 --> 00:18:27,653
So do you know what it does?
391
00:18:27,736 --> 00:18:30,197
I mean, each one sort of
has a unique thing.
392
00:18:30,281 --> 00:18:31,448
I don't know.
393
00:18:32,324 --> 00:18:35,452
Maybe you can figure it out.
Yeah.
394
00:18:35,744 --> 00:18:38,497
Uh... Here's to that.
395
00:18:38,998 --> 00:18:40,207
(BOTH LAUGH)
396
00:18:44,169 --> 00:18:45,379
(SIGHS)
397
00:18:46,338 --> 00:18:48,340
You wanna? Yeah.
Oh.
398
00:18:51,635 --> 00:18:54,138
Okay.
Well, here goes nothing.
399
00:18:56,807 --> 00:18:57,850
(SIGHS)
400
00:18:57,933 --> 00:18:59,310
(SPEAKING FARSI)
401
00:19:01,270 --> 00:19:03,772
Ugh. Man, one of your wires
is coming loose.
402
00:19:03,856 --> 00:19:05,649
You're gonna
kill yourselves!
403
00:19:05,733 --> 00:19:09,069
Oh, my God. I can't...
Golly Moses.
404
00:19:09,361 --> 00:19:11,238
You're right.
They're gonna kill themselves.
405
00:19:11,322 --> 00:19:13,574
Don't you have some shower
to go haunt?
406
00:19:13,657 --> 00:19:15,409
Oh, no one's
showering right now.
407
00:19:15,784 --> 00:19:17,703
Except Fogg,
and he's asleep.
408
00:19:17,870 --> 00:19:20,581
Jesus, that man needs help.
Is he all right?
409
00:19:20,664 --> 00:19:22,624
Just a bit zozzled, I think.
410
00:19:23,334 --> 00:19:25,419
He was quite naked.
(CHUCKLES)
411
00:19:26,170 --> 00:19:28,714
Remarkably well-preserved.
412
00:19:30,007 --> 00:19:32,343
Guess it's possible
to age gracefully.
413
00:19:32,760 --> 00:19:33,969
PENNY: Oh, my God.
414
00:19:34,053 --> 00:19:36,013
Fuck, man.
I can't watch this.
415
00:19:36,513 --> 00:19:39,391
See? This is what I love
about you, Penny.
416
00:19:39,516 --> 00:19:40,851
You act
like you don't care,
417
00:19:40,934 --> 00:19:43,645
but really, you care most
in this whole story.
418
00:19:43,896 --> 00:19:45,731
Yeah, then... Then why
is everyone acting
419
00:19:45,814 --> 00:19:47,691
like I'm not a part
of it anymore?
420
00:19:47,775 --> 00:19:52,154
Maybe it's time to blouse
this Popsicle stand.
421
00:19:52,321 --> 00:19:53,822
You mean, leave?
Why not?
422
00:19:53,906 --> 00:19:55,699
Go find a story to watch
423
00:19:55,783 --> 00:19:57,534
that doesn't make you
so depressed.
424
00:19:57,743 --> 00:19:58,786
(GASPING)
425
00:19:58,869 --> 00:20:00,621
Oh, I think they did it.
426
00:20:00,913 --> 00:20:02,122
(GASPS)
427
00:20:07,044 --> 00:20:08,754
I'm having a good time.
428
00:20:09,546 --> 00:20:10,547
Mmm.
429
00:20:14,051 --> 00:20:15,719
You just wait a second,
I'm gonna close...
430
00:20:41,787 --> 00:20:43,580
Rise and shine, princess.
431
00:20:44,957 --> 00:20:46,667
(STUTTERS) Who?
432
00:20:46,750 --> 00:20:48,710
The real question, dipshit,
is how you managed
433
00:20:48,794 --> 00:20:50,712
to black out after,
what, five drinks?
434
00:20:50,796 --> 00:20:52,506
Why do you always have
to embarrass yourself?
435
00:20:52,589 --> 00:20:53,632
I don't...
436
00:20:54,466 --> 00:20:55,717
Okay.
437
00:20:57,386 --> 00:20:58,512
Um...
438
00:21:00,681 --> 00:21:02,015
Seriously.
439
00:21:02,474 --> 00:21:05,060
You hold your liquor
like a kindergartner.
440
00:21:07,980 --> 00:21:11,483
Sorry, um, can you... Are
you... Are you seeing this?
441
00:21:13,861 --> 00:21:15,320
Nobody cares, dude.
442
00:21:15,404 --> 00:21:17,865
They all have actual jobs,
unlike you.
443
00:21:18,073 --> 00:21:19,366
Right, okay.
444
00:21:19,700 --> 00:21:20,993
No problem.
445
00:21:27,124 --> 00:21:29,042
What the fuck did you do?
Okay, I can explain.
446
00:21:29,126 --> 00:21:31,044
What is this key?
Just calm down.
447
00:21:31,128 --> 00:21:33,422
It's all right.
There's another me.
448
00:21:33,505 --> 00:21:35,632
And he's mean,
and no one else can see him.
449
00:21:35,716 --> 00:21:37,426
Nothing about this
is all right.
450
00:21:37,509 --> 00:21:39,261
Okay, listen.
Here's the deal.
451
00:21:39,678 --> 00:21:41,805
The key does have a power.
No shit.
452
00:21:41,889 --> 00:21:43,474
It takes the darkest parts
of you
453
00:21:43,557 --> 00:21:46,477
and makes a kind of...
Well, you met it.
454
00:21:46,810 --> 00:21:49,938
It's kind of like
a depression monster?
455
00:21:50,022 --> 00:21:52,649
Looks like you,
talks like you.
456
00:21:53,859 --> 00:21:56,236
But don't worry, it can't
actually hurt you.
457
00:21:56,945 --> 00:21:58,906
Unless...
Unless?
458
00:21:58,989 --> 00:22:00,449
Unless it gets in your head
459
00:22:00,532 --> 00:22:01,658
and convinces you
to hurt yourself.
460
00:22:01,742 --> 00:22:03,494
Well...
But you'll be fine.
461
00:22:03,577 --> 00:22:05,496
It only affects the last
person who touched the key.
462
00:22:05,579 --> 00:22:07,539
So just pass it along
to someone else.
463
00:22:07,623 --> 00:22:10,667
That's what we did.
Who's we?
464
00:22:10,751 --> 00:22:11,919
My former shipmates.
465
00:22:12,002 --> 00:22:13,420
After I stole the key,
466
00:22:13,504 --> 00:22:14,838
we passed it
from person to person
467
00:22:14,922 --> 00:22:17,758
until we, you know,
ran out of options.
468
00:22:17,841 --> 00:22:20,010
What does that mean,
you ran out of options?
469
00:22:20,260 --> 00:22:21,261
Um...
470
00:22:21,345 --> 00:22:22,804
Hit an iceberg?
471
00:22:23,180 --> 00:22:24,848
I happened to be holding
the key when we sank
472
00:22:24,932 --> 00:22:26,934
'cause the rest of 'em
just couldn't handle it.
473
00:22:27,142 --> 00:22:28,810
You have to be, like,
a badass about it,
474
00:22:28,894 --> 00:22:30,729
and what can I say?
475
00:22:30,812 --> 00:22:32,564
They were weak.
Okay, I'm sorry.
476
00:22:32,648 --> 00:22:35,692
Exactly how many of them
survived the key before you?
477
00:22:35,943 --> 00:22:38,028
Hmm. Maybe, like, half?
478
00:22:38,278 --> 00:22:40,072
This key made half
of your shipmates
479
00:22:40,155 --> 00:22:42,533
kill themselves,
and you gave it to me?
480
00:22:42,616 --> 00:22:44,451
Yeah. But don't worry.
481
00:22:44,535 --> 00:22:47,329
They were all pretty
psychologically damaged already.
482
00:22:47,538 --> 00:22:49,623
You'll be fine.
You're so happy and positive.
483
00:22:50,749 --> 00:22:52,626
No. No, no.
484
00:22:52,793 --> 00:22:54,878
I'm not. This is like...
485
00:22:54,962 --> 00:22:56,421
It's like
we're on a boat, okay?
486
00:22:56,505 --> 00:22:58,006
This is not how I usually am.
487
00:22:58,090 --> 00:22:59,841
You're usually a wet blanket,
self-pitying,
488
00:22:59,925 --> 00:23:01,051
party pooping dickwad.
489
00:23:01,134 --> 00:23:03,053
Shut up!
490
00:23:03,637 --> 00:23:05,430
You better pass that
along fast.
491
00:23:05,514 --> 00:23:07,891
What? No!
Not if there is a 50%
492
00:23:07,975 --> 00:23:09,518
chance of it killing
the next person.
493
00:23:09,893 --> 00:23:11,186
(STUTTERS)
494
00:23:11,645 --> 00:23:12,729
Okay.
495
00:23:13,981 --> 00:23:16,191
Right, yep.
I'll just hold on to it.
496
00:23:16,650 --> 00:23:18,360
Until we get back
to Whitespire.
497
00:23:18,735 --> 00:23:20,737
I can do that.
Your choice.
498
00:23:20,821 --> 00:23:22,239
I mean,
we're stuck in The Abyss
499
00:23:22,322 --> 00:23:23,532
till we found our way out.
500
00:23:23,615 --> 00:23:24,616
It could be days.
501
00:23:24,700 --> 00:23:26,326
It could be weeks.
502
00:23:26,618 --> 00:23:28,453
But hey. Don't stress.
503
00:23:29,079 --> 00:23:30,998
You might be fine.
You won't be.
504
00:23:31,081 --> 00:23:32,416
You know what?
505
00:23:33,000 --> 00:23:35,669
I have come up against you
before, asshole.
506
00:23:36,003 --> 00:23:38,255
Maybe a little more subtly,
but you and I both know
507
00:23:38,338 --> 00:23:39,756
that I've got a black belt.
508
00:23:39,965 --> 00:23:41,258
So come at me.
509
00:23:45,971 --> 00:23:47,472
The problem is your hair.
510
00:23:47,556 --> 00:23:48,974
I know you're just trying
to hide your face,
511
00:23:49,057 --> 00:23:50,767
but it really only
makes it worse.
512
00:23:51,184 --> 00:23:52,769
Seriously,
have you ever noticed
513
00:23:52,853 --> 00:23:54,271
that your face sort of
looks like a foot?
514
00:23:54,354 --> 00:23:55,939
If feet had frown lines?
515
00:23:56,023 --> 00:23:57,983
I mean, you're definitely
aging prematurely,
516
00:23:58,066 --> 00:24:00,944
which is a symptom
of early-onset Alzheimer's.
517
00:24:01,028 --> 00:24:03,655
Which, funny,
both your grandparents had.
518
00:24:03,739 --> 00:24:06,617
And you will definitely get it
so then you'll be
519
00:24:06,700 --> 00:24:08,577
a senile frowny foot-face.
520
00:24:09,161 --> 00:24:10,704
Jesus. Fuck.
521
00:24:12,331 --> 00:24:15,626
This is pointless.
You can't run me off.
522
00:24:16,877 --> 00:24:18,879
You can't eat me off.
523
00:24:19,880 --> 00:24:21,757
You can't drink me off.
524
00:24:23,133 --> 00:24:26,011
You can't jerk me off.
525
00:24:26,136 --> 00:24:27,554
God, you're so vulgar.
526
00:24:27,638 --> 00:24:30,182
We had a thing going,
and you... You made it
527
00:24:30,265 --> 00:24:32,059
unnecessarily gross.
528
00:24:32,142 --> 00:24:34,770
You sick of the shallow,
petty stuff?
529
00:24:35,896 --> 00:24:37,272
I get it.
530
00:24:38,231 --> 00:24:40,067
The thing is,
I start on the outside,
531
00:24:40,150 --> 00:24:42,110
and I work my way
into the core.
532
00:24:42,361 --> 00:24:45,947
The part of you
that kept magic from Julia
533
00:24:46,031 --> 00:24:47,282
when you could have
helped her,
534
00:24:47,366 --> 00:24:50,702
that is what set her
on that path.
535
00:24:50,786 --> 00:24:54,289
You got your best friend
sexually assaulted.
536
00:24:55,082 --> 00:24:57,209
And let's talk about
what happened to Alice.
537
00:24:57,292 --> 00:24:58,627
You ruined her.
538
00:24:58,752 --> 00:25:01,213
And she is never going to be
the girl that she was.
539
00:25:01,296 --> 00:25:03,882
You killed her,
and she is never coming back.
540
00:25:03,965 --> 00:25:07,928
How many people have to pay
the price for your heroics?
541
00:25:08,553 --> 00:25:09,680
Just stop!
542
00:25:09,763 --> 00:25:11,973
You are willing to destroy
everyone around you
543
00:25:12,057 --> 00:25:14,643
to find something
that makes you feel okay.
544
00:25:14,726 --> 00:25:16,687
But you are never
gonna feel okay.
545
00:25:16,770 --> 00:25:19,314
No, stop. You're trying
to get in my head.
546
00:25:19,606 --> 00:25:20,941
Quentin.
547
00:25:22,776 --> 00:25:24,236
I am your head.
548
00:25:24,319 --> 00:25:27,280
You know I'm right
because I am you.
549
00:25:32,828 --> 00:25:36,832
To Mr. and Mrs...
Fomar.
550
00:25:37,040 --> 00:25:38,709
Fomar.
551
00:25:39,292 --> 00:25:40,544
Bottoms up.
552
00:25:42,879 --> 00:25:46,174
In my culture, the
woman always drinks first.
553
00:25:46,550 --> 00:25:47,718
Drink the wine, Margo.
554
00:25:47,801 --> 00:25:49,344
I don't wanna
drink the wine.
555
00:25:49,428 --> 00:25:51,763
What I wanted was for you
to handle this, Eliot.
556
00:25:51,847 --> 00:25:53,598
You'll feel better
if you just
557
00:25:53,682 --> 00:25:56,643
drink the wine, Margo.
558
00:26:05,277 --> 00:26:06,653
(COUGHS)
559
00:26:08,113 --> 00:26:09,823
So, um...
560
00:26:10,824 --> 00:26:13,118
Do we have sex
in the carriage?
561
00:26:13,201 --> 00:26:15,912
Or do we have sex outside?
562
00:26:15,996 --> 00:26:20,041
Or do...
I'm not having sex with you.
563
00:26:20,125 --> 00:26:23,336
You psychotic fetus.
564
00:26:23,712 --> 00:26:25,130
Ever.
565
00:26:33,513 --> 00:26:35,390
Either I just killed him
with my rage
566
00:26:35,474 --> 00:26:36,933
or you drugged his wine.
567
00:26:37,017 --> 00:26:38,769
And to think...
568
00:26:38,852 --> 00:26:39,978
You doubted me.
569
00:26:40,061 --> 00:26:41,062
To think.
570
00:26:42,272 --> 00:26:46,568
I just spent three days locked
in a dungeon with him.
571
00:26:46,777 --> 00:26:48,862
Okay. Yes, and that sucks.
572
00:26:48,945 --> 00:26:51,281
But we have a problem,
possibly much bigger
573
00:26:51,364 --> 00:26:53,200
than sleeping beauty
over here.
574
00:26:53,283 --> 00:26:54,284
The fairies
are up to something
575
00:26:54,367 --> 00:26:55,368
in the Northern Orchards.
576
00:26:55,452 --> 00:26:57,329
They evacuated the villagers
weeks ago
577
00:26:57,412 --> 00:26:59,664
and haven't let another
human in since.
578
00:26:59,748 --> 00:27:02,959
Except Ess came through
on his way from Loria,
579
00:27:03,043 --> 00:27:05,045
and he saw some crazy shit.
580
00:27:05,128 --> 00:27:07,464
Rivers running red,
three-eyed fanged toads,
581
00:27:07,547 --> 00:27:10,425
mutant plant life,
Chernobyl-level shit.
582
00:27:10,509 --> 00:27:13,428
I think the fairies might
be poisoning the ecosystem.
583
00:27:13,512 --> 00:27:16,598
Great, well,
now I can't be mad at you.
584
00:27:17,140 --> 00:27:18,266
Thanks.
585
00:27:18,767 --> 00:27:20,685
I know,
I wanted to fight, too,
586
00:27:20,769 --> 00:27:22,813
so that we could make up
and on the other side of it,
587
00:27:22,896 --> 00:27:25,065
we could just...
Be us again?
588
00:27:25,732 --> 00:27:27,317
Who are we now, El?
589
00:27:27,400 --> 00:27:28,819
We used to be glamorous,
590
00:27:28,902 --> 00:27:30,821
amazing mega-bitches.
591
00:27:31,530 --> 00:27:32,906
And now?
592
00:27:33,156 --> 00:27:36,743
We have depth and character.
593
00:27:37,452 --> 00:27:40,413
Let's decide...
We'll find us again
594
00:27:40,497 --> 00:27:42,833
once we're done
saving Fillory.
595
00:27:42,916 --> 00:27:44,167
Okay?
596
00:27:45,168 --> 00:27:46,336
(HORSE NEIGHING)
597
00:27:46,419 --> 00:27:47,921
Duty calls.
598
00:27:48,004 --> 00:27:49,923
Let's go see
about these orchards.
599
00:27:56,054 --> 00:27:57,722
Which are...
600
00:28:01,935 --> 00:28:03,603
No longer here.
601
00:28:11,027 --> 00:28:14,030
Nothing is going to save you.
Not Brakebills.
602
00:28:14,114 --> 00:28:16,449
Not Fillory.
Not a quest.
603
00:28:17,117 --> 00:28:18,326
Just do it.
604
00:28:19,911 --> 00:28:21,329
Kill yourself.
605
00:28:21,913 --> 00:28:23,665
Make it stop.
606
00:28:24,624 --> 00:28:26,376
You know the way out.
607
00:28:37,470 --> 00:28:38,972
BENEDICT: King Quentin, no!
608
00:28:39,639 --> 00:28:41,182
No, I wasn't. I was just...
609
00:28:41,516 --> 00:28:42,893
I thought I saw something.
Your Majesty,
610
00:28:42,976 --> 00:28:45,312
if I may, I understand
what you're contemplating.
611
00:28:45,729 --> 00:28:47,188
I thought about it too.
612
00:28:47,981 --> 00:28:50,901
Though I have never spoken
about it, of course.
613
00:28:51,943 --> 00:28:52,986
Why not?
614
00:28:53,278 --> 00:28:56,489
Well, you know what parents
teach you about emotions.
615
00:28:57,324 --> 00:29:01,703
That you should bottle them up
and never talk about them
616
00:29:02,329 --> 00:29:05,999
and turn them into maps,
for example.
617
00:29:06,124 --> 00:29:07,584
Jesus, Benedict.
618
00:29:08,335 --> 00:29:10,086
Okay, we should
talk about this.
619
00:29:10,170 --> 00:29:12,088
If it please you, Sire,
but first,
620
00:29:12,172 --> 00:29:14,257
why don't we step away
from the edge of the boat?
621
00:29:17,177 --> 00:29:20,805
Yeah. I don't really
trust myself right now.
622
00:29:21,348 --> 00:29:25,185
You know, in old days,
when sailors would go mad,
623
00:29:25,477 --> 00:29:27,520
the crew would tie them
to the mast. (CHUCKLES)
624
00:29:27,771 --> 00:29:28,980
Isn't that funny?
625
00:29:29,064 --> 00:29:30,565
Oh, my God.
Tie me to the mast.
626
00:29:30,899 --> 00:29:31,983
(CHUCKLES)
627
00:29:34,194 --> 00:29:36,655
No... No, Your Majesty.
No, do it.
628
00:29:37,197 --> 00:29:39,824
Okay, swear to me,
no matter what I say,
629
00:29:39,908 --> 00:29:42,494
that you will not untie me
until we get to Whitespire.
630
00:29:43,995 --> 00:29:46,873
Very well. I won't.
631
00:29:47,374 --> 00:29:48,750
Thank you.
632
00:30:16,736 --> 00:30:17,904
It worked.
633
00:30:20,407 --> 00:30:21,825
Thank you.
634
00:30:23,326 --> 00:30:24,911
(LAUGHS)
635
00:30:26,371 --> 00:30:27,622
(SIGHS)
636
00:31:12,792 --> 00:31:16,254
Oh, I see
the transfer worked.
637
00:31:16,337 --> 00:31:19,424
It's still small, I can feel
that, but I'm gonna grow it.
638
00:31:19,507 --> 00:31:21,009
I hope you'll be careful.
639
00:31:21,801 --> 00:31:22,802
I will be.
640
00:31:24,679 --> 00:31:28,308
You know that
fixing my glasses
641
00:31:28,683 --> 00:31:29,893
won't fix me.
642
00:31:30,852 --> 00:31:32,687
Yeah, but they make
all of this
643
00:31:32,771 --> 00:31:34,314
one speck less shitty.
644
00:31:39,986 --> 00:31:41,112
(MARGO GROANS)
645
00:31:42,447 --> 00:31:44,324
MARGO: It smells like
the fairy realm.
646
00:31:46,076 --> 00:31:47,452
We're so far north.
647
00:31:47,702 --> 00:31:50,497
The climate should be cold
and dry, not hot and moist.
648
00:31:50,580 --> 00:31:52,957
Yeah, well, they're such
moisture freaks.
649
00:31:53,666 --> 00:31:56,377
All that spritzing
and bathing.
650
00:31:56,711 --> 00:31:59,089
You know, it's...
It's like they're afraid
651
00:31:59,172 --> 00:32:01,800
to dry out
in Fillory or something.
652
00:32:04,094 --> 00:32:05,929
Oh, my God.
653
00:32:07,555 --> 00:32:10,225
The fuckers are terraforming.
654
00:32:10,517 --> 00:32:13,186
They're turning our kingdom
into a mushroom steam bath.
655
00:32:13,269 --> 00:32:14,813
That is not okay.
No.
656
00:32:15,021 --> 00:32:16,397
Definitely not.
657
00:32:18,650 --> 00:32:20,568
That mushroom just moved.
658
00:32:21,236 --> 00:32:23,154
Really?
Should I pluck it?
659
00:32:25,824 --> 00:32:27,283
I'm gonna do it.
660
00:32:27,367 --> 00:32:29,077
Margo, don't.
661
00:32:35,792 --> 00:32:37,168
(GASPS)
Oh.
662
00:32:40,004 --> 00:32:41,756
(WHIMPERS)
Uh...
663
00:32:42,173 --> 00:32:44,342
It's a fairy embryo.
664
00:32:45,552 --> 00:32:47,720
Really?
These are eggs, El.
665
00:32:48,054 --> 00:32:49,264
I mean, really?
666
00:32:49,347 --> 00:32:51,141
The fairies
aren't just terraforming.
667
00:32:51,224 --> 00:32:53,309
They're growing an army.
668
00:32:53,393 --> 00:32:54,644
Oh, fuck.
669
00:32:57,605 --> 00:33:00,525
I think these fairies might
actually qualify as Big Bads.
670
00:33:00,608 --> 00:33:02,819
I mean, think about
all the crazy shit
671
00:33:02,902 --> 00:33:04,529
they've kept us busy with.
672
00:33:04,612 --> 00:33:08,158
Earthworms, adolescent
slug mash, turtle semen.
673
00:33:08,241 --> 00:33:11,077
This is all just
a thin frosting of whimsy
674
00:33:11,161 --> 00:33:14,080
on a cupcake of conspiracy.
675
00:33:14,289 --> 00:33:17,542
No, no, no, no, no, no.
This is a full-scale invasion.
676
00:33:17,625 --> 00:33:20,211
We need a plan bigger than
just assassinating the Queen.
677
00:33:20,295 --> 00:33:23,715
We need... We need... We
need... We need... We need...
678
00:33:23,798 --> 00:33:26,718
We need... Margo?
679
00:33:28,469 --> 00:33:29,721
Margo?
680
00:33:30,847 --> 00:33:32,640
Kidnapping. Hostages.
Leverage.
681
00:33:32,724 --> 00:33:35,393
Don't ask questions, go! Go!
What the fuck?
682
00:33:35,476 --> 00:33:37,312
Go, go!
683
00:33:47,572 --> 00:33:48,948
It's a bitch, right?
684
00:33:49,574 --> 00:33:51,534
Imagine being stuck
on a raft with that thing.
685
00:33:51,618 --> 00:33:53,244
Have you tried
distracting it?
686
00:33:53,328 --> 00:33:56,039
For some reason, mine
was really into seagulls.
687
00:33:56,289 --> 00:33:57,790
Wonder if that's because
I'm into seagulls?
688
00:33:57,874 --> 00:33:59,584
Please, fuck off.
689
00:33:59,667 --> 00:34:01,753
Look, I'm sorry
I passed you the key.
690
00:34:01,836 --> 00:34:03,338
I really thought
you could handle it.
691
00:34:03,630 --> 00:34:05,423
This is me handling it.
692
00:34:05,506 --> 00:34:07,342
No, no, you're right.
693
00:34:08,509 --> 00:34:10,720
I wish we'd thought
of tying ourselves up.
694
00:34:10,803 --> 00:34:13,139
That first day,
we passed it around randomly.
695
00:34:13,223 --> 00:34:14,891
That killed three of us
off quick.
696
00:34:15,016 --> 00:34:16,726
Called it Bloody Tuesday.
697
00:34:16,809 --> 00:34:18,770
We figured out it affects
some people right away.
698
00:34:18,853 --> 00:34:21,397
Others, it takes time
to wear down.
699
00:34:24,275 --> 00:34:25,610
You want me to take the key
for a while?
700
00:34:25,693 --> 00:34:26,861
Give you some relief?
701
00:34:26,945 --> 00:34:28,238
No.
702
00:34:29,447 --> 00:34:31,616
I don't trust you not
to pass it on to someone else.
703
00:34:31,908 --> 00:34:33,451
And I need it.
704
00:34:34,369 --> 00:34:35,995
For the quest. (EXHALES)
Fine.
705
00:34:36,412 --> 00:34:37,956
Be a suffer-martyr.
706
00:34:38,581 --> 00:34:40,291
Look, the keys don't
just make you suffer.
707
00:34:40,375 --> 00:34:41,793
They help sometimes, too.
708
00:34:42,418 --> 00:34:45,088
Like with the keyholes
and shit like that.
709
00:34:45,630 --> 00:34:46,798
Keyholes, like...
710
00:34:47,048 --> 00:34:49,968
Like in the walls
or clocks.
711
00:34:50,718 --> 00:34:52,262
Don't ask me how it works.
712
00:34:52,887 --> 00:34:55,265
So... So where do
the keyholes go?
713
00:34:55,348 --> 00:34:58,851
To Earth or the Neither lands
or wherever.
714
00:34:58,935 --> 00:35:01,271
Wait, wait.
Are you serious?
715
00:35:06,734 --> 00:35:08,403
Stop it.
What are you doing?
716
00:35:08,486 --> 00:35:09,696
I've been stuck here
in Fillory this whole time
717
00:35:09,779 --> 00:35:10,989
when I could have gone home?
718
00:35:11,072 --> 00:35:13,658
Hey. No, Poppy, stop it.
719
00:35:13,741 --> 00:35:16,327
Poppy, no. Stop.
720
00:35:16,411 --> 00:35:17,829
Poppy!
721
00:35:18,746 --> 00:35:20,873
I told you
you should've killed yourself.
722
00:35:20,957 --> 00:35:22,041
(EXHALES SHARPLY)
723
00:35:23,793 --> 00:35:24,919
Okay.
724
00:35:28,381 --> 00:35:30,675
Okay, we just have
one outstanding problem.
725
00:35:31,092 --> 00:35:32,927
You kind of still need
to fuck your husband.
726
00:35:33,011 --> 00:35:34,595
Don't worry. I got this.
727
00:35:37,765 --> 00:35:38,975
(CROAKING)
728
00:35:39,976 --> 00:35:44,105
Let's just say Ess was right
about the toads in these parts.
729
00:35:44,439 --> 00:35:47,108
They've got three eyes?
No, baby.
730
00:35:47,650 --> 00:35:49,152
They've got fangs.
731
00:35:51,863 --> 00:35:53,906
(FOMAR MOANING)
732
00:35:56,117 --> 00:35:58,786
Oh ! Oh,
something bit my manhood.
733
00:35:58,870 --> 00:36:00,872
Congratulations, son.
You just had sex.
734
00:36:00,955 --> 00:36:02,749
The first time's
always painful.
735
00:36:02,832 --> 00:36:05,001
It's all those teeth
they've got down there.
736
00:36:05,293 --> 00:36:08,588
But, hey, you were amazing.
737
00:36:09,547 --> 00:36:10,882
What?
738
00:36:10,965 --> 00:36:12,675
I like to watch.
739
00:36:14,344 --> 00:36:15,928
Wanna go again?
740
00:36:16,929 --> 00:36:17,972
Hmm?
741
00:36:18,806 --> 00:36:19,849
QUENTIN: Benedict!
742
00:36:23,811 --> 00:36:25,355
Benedict, help!
743
00:36:26,439 --> 00:36:27,690
Your Majesty?
Oh, my God, Benedict.
744
00:36:27,774 --> 00:36:28,941
Okay, untie me.
745
00:36:29,025 --> 00:36:30,276
Sire, you said
not to untie you.
746
00:36:30,360 --> 00:36:31,402
No. No, no, no, no, no.
747
00:36:31,486 --> 00:36:32,737
Please, come on. Okay, look.
748
00:36:32,820 --> 00:36:34,405
I'm not trying
to kill myself.
749
00:36:34,489 --> 00:36:36,324
Poppy took the key,
and she is trying
750
00:36:36,407 --> 00:36:37,742
to use it to get back
to Earth.
751
00:36:37,825 --> 00:36:39,619
Just... Okay,
go find her yourself.
752
00:36:39,702 --> 00:36:42,330
Just whatever you do, do not
let her leave with that key.
753
00:36:42,413 --> 00:36:43,581
Yes, Your Majesty.
754
00:36:45,416 --> 00:36:46,751
God.
755
00:36:50,129 --> 00:36:51,714
No! Stop!
756
00:36:52,131 --> 00:36:53,424
(GRUNTING)
757
00:37:03,184 --> 00:37:04,644
Hey, did you get it?
758
00:37:04,727 --> 00:37:06,020
I'm sorry, Your Majesty.
759
00:37:07,939 --> 00:37:09,774
I'm a terrible failure.
760
00:37:10,358 --> 00:37:12,443
Okay. It's okay.
761
00:37:13,528 --> 00:37:15,113
We'll get
the key back somehow.
762
00:37:23,037 --> 00:37:24,330
Benedict.
763
00:37:28,334 --> 00:37:30,211
Hey, hey. Benedict.
764
00:37:30,503 --> 00:37:32,130
Whoa, Benedict, no.
Hey, listen.
765
00:37:32,213 --> 00:37:35,007
Whatever it's telling you
to do, do not do it.
766
00:37:35,967 --> 00:37:37,301
I'm sorry.
767
00:37:38,469 --> 00:37:39,720
Benedict, no!
768
00:37:51,190 --> 00:37:53,234
Mmm. Yummy.
769
00:37:54,694 --> 00:37:55,736
Oh.
770
00:38:02,743 --> 00:38:04,245
(HUMMING)
771
00:38:07,373 --> 00:38:08,374
(MUSIC PLAYING)
772
00:38:08,458 --> 00:38:11,169
Oh, as long as I know
how to love
773
00:38:11,252 --> 00:38:12,670
I know I'll stay alive
774
00:38:12,753 --> 00:38:14,547
I've got all my life to live
775
00:38:14,630 --> 00:38:16,632
I've got all my love to give
776
00:38:16,716 --> 00:38:20,386
And I'll survive, hey, hey
777
00:38:20,470 --> 00:38:22,138
Penny, what's wrong?
778
00:38:22,221 --> 00:38:24,182
Just saying goodbye.
What?
779
00:38:24,640 --> 00:38:26,184
Goodbye?
Where are you going?
780
00:38:26,767 --> 00:38:28,019
Just away.
781
00:38:28,144 --> 00:38:29,437
Away... Wait.
782
00:38:30,146 --> 00:38:33,608
Fuck, I hate this thing.
Um, I don't understand.
783
00:38:33,691 --> 00:38:35,067
Is this because
of what happened with Kady?
784
00:38:35,151 --> 00:38:36,569
No.
Okay.
785
00:38:36,652 --> 00:38:37,904
Is it because
we did the transfer?
786
00:38:37,987 --> 00:38:40,198
No. Look, I gotta go.
787
00:38:40,281 --> 00:38:41,824
Wait, will you just
talk to me for a second?
788
00:38:41,908 --> 00:38:44,243
You know what,
we barely know each other.
789
00:38:44,327 --> 00:38:47,121
Don't suddenly act like you
care just 'cause I'm going.
790
00:38:47,205 --> 00:38:48,706
I'm not acting.
791
00:38:48,789 --> 00:38:50,041
I do care.
I don't want to see you go.
792
00:38:50,124 --> 00:38:51,709
I don't want
to see you give up.
793
00:38:51,792 --> 00:38:53,961
Give up?
Yeah.
794
00:38:54,045 --> 00:38:57,381
You're the one who had magic,
and you gave it away.
795
00:38:58,216 --> 00:39:01,052
What's your plan?
Go back to law school?
796
00:39:01,135 --> 00:39:02,803
Live off your trust fund?
797
00:39:02,887 --> 00:39:05,473
Actually, no, my plan
was to take five minutes
798
00:39:05,556 --> 00:39:07,934
and try to remember
what life was like
799
00:39:08,017 --> 00:39:10,228
without a god or a quest.
800
00:39:10,311 --> 00:39:11,938
Or some dead asshole
bothering me.
801
00:39:12,021 --> 00:39:13,648
And, I don't know,
frankly beyond that,
802
00:39:13,731 --> 00:39:14,941
it's none of your business.
803
00:39:15,024 --> 00:39:17,777
'Cause you have
nothing beyond that.
804
00:39:17,860 --> 00:39:19,070
(DOOR OPENS)
805
00:39:24,033 --> 00:39:25,618
Penny wants to say goodbye.
806
00:39:27,870 --> 00:39:30,957
You're leaving?
I can't do this anymore.
807
00:39:32,041 --> 00:39:35,419
I can't be a ghost person
in my own life, okay?
808
00:39:39,882 --> 00:39:41,842
Why don't I just
make you a new body?
809
00:39:43,052 --> 00:39:44,512
Like Mayakovsky did for me.
810
00:39:50,560 --> 00:39:52,812
(DOG BARKING)
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
811
00:40:02,572 --> 00:40:03,698
(GASPS)
812
00:40:03,781 --> 00:40:05,908
A-plus job
getting rid of me, gorgeous.
813
00:40:07,410 --> 00:40:08,828
Is this just a dream?
814
00:40:09,996 --> 00:40:12,915
That time you fell out of
the tree when you were 12.
815
00:40:12,999 --> 00:40:17,003
The bone in your arm healed
in six little weeks.
816
00:40:17,086 --> 00:40:19,463
How come your fear
of heights never did?
817
00:40:24,927 --> 00:40:26,304
I'm not the bone.
818
00:40:27,888 --> 00:40:29,223
I'm the terror.
819
00:40:31,309 --> 00:40:33,644
I do love how you keep trying.
820
00:40:34,645 --> 00:40:36,147
And trying.
821
00:40:37,273 --> 00:40:41,027
And trying. And trying.
822
00:40:41,110 --> 00:40:42,278
(GASPS)
823
00:40:47,783 --> 00:40:49,160
(GRUNTS)
I have not been punched
824
00:40:49,243 --> 00:40:50,620
that hard since Burning Man.
825
00:40:50,703 --> 00:40:53,456
Where is he?
Where did he go?
826
00:40:55,124 --> 00:40:56,917
Why does it smell
like barbeque?
827
00:41:00,338 --> 00:41:03,215
Benedict is dead,
and best-case scenario,
828
00:41:03,299 --> 00:41:04,717
the dragon shits the key
into the bottom of the ocean.
829
00:41:04,800 --> 00:41:06,844
Um, Quentin.
Don't talk to me.
830
00:41:06,927 --> 00:41:08,888
Please, I mean it.
Okay.
831
00:41:08,971 --> 00:41:10,890
Just... (CLEARS THROAT)
Just one thing
832
00:41:10,973 --> 00:41:12,600
and I swear I will never
talk to you again.
833
00:41:12,683 --> 00:41:13,726
What?
834
00:41:13,809 --> 00:41:15,770
Dragons don't shit.
835
00:41:15,853 --> 00:41:17,813
Okay, great,
fun fact. Thanks.
836
00:41:17,897 --> 00:41:19,357
No one knows exactly
how it works,
837
00:41:19,440 --> 00:41:22,068
but what they ingest
goes elsewhere.
838
00:41:22,151 --> 00:41:23,778
They're gatekeepers,
you know?
839
00:41:23,861 --> 00:41:25,404
They don't just make portals.
840
00:41:25,488 --> 00:41:26,864
They are portals.
841
00:41:27,490 --> 00:41:30,660
So, actual
best-case scenario...
842
00:41:30,993 --> 00:41:32,620
The key went
to the Underworld.
843
00:41:33,746 --> 00:41:34,789
Mmm.
844
00:41:34,872 --> 00:41:36,207
Oh, my God.
845
00:41:43,214 --> 00:41:44,799
If you're here,
I'm practicing
846
00:41:44,882 --> 00:41:47,134
an Osseus Confervium.
Bone-knitting.
847
00:41:47,218 --> 00:41:48,969
First step to building
a new body.
848
00:41:49,387 --> 00:41:52,223
I know you can't see me,
but I'm here.
849
00:41:53,849 --> 00:41:55,309
Thanks for giving a shit
about me.
850
00:42:00,773 --> 00:42:01,982
Alice?
851
00:42:02,274 --> 00:42:03,275
(BREATHING SHAKILY)
852
00:42:03,359 --> 00:42:05,444
Alice, you okay? Alice?
853
00:42:06,028 --> 00:42:08,239
God, Alice. Alice!
854
00:42:08,447 --> 00:42:10,950
God, this is... Where's...
855
00:42:11,826 --> 00:42:12,868
Alice!
856
00:42:14,203 --> 00:42:15,496
(BREATHES HEAVILY)
857
00:42:16,831 --> 00:42:20,042
Okay, okay, God.
Come on.
858
00:42:20,876 --> 00:42:24,213
Come on, someone's got
to hear this, please.
859
00:42:28,050 --> 00:42:29,051
(MUSIC PLAYING)
860
00:42:29,135 --> 00:42:31,470
Oh, as long as I know
how to love
861
00:42:31,554 --> 00:42:33,222
I know I'll stay alive
862
00:42:33,305 --> 00:42:35,182
I've got all my life to live
863
00:42:35,266 --> 00:42:37,309
I've got all my love to give
864
00:42:37,393 --> 00:42:40,187
And I'll survive, hey, hey
865
00:42:55,828 --> 00:42:59,415
It took all the strength
I had not to fall apart
866
00:42:59,498 --> 00:43:03,252
Kept trying hard to mend
the pieces of my broken heart
867
00:43:03,276 --> 00:43:08,276
http://hiqve.com/
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