Original subtitles

Get out of here.

Previously on Best Medicine.

Are you more as parents?

I'm his best friend.

Why are you here?

I've decided to sell a house.

My house?

My house.

It was left to me.

I'm the eldest son.

I'm talking viral.

Is this what you're going to do with your life?

What?

Be a garbage person.

He makes you think it doesn't a dog.

What am I dedicating my life to?

I've loved Louisus since I was 12 years old.

She's perfect.

Nobody's perfect.

The only main thing she's ever done is to break up with it.

Maybe we could get together for a real date.

Martin.

And how?

Exhale.

Hey, Martin, buddy.

Not sure if you're here yet, but... I'm going to call you back, buddy.

We were both riding the adrenaline of the moment,

but I'm happy to pretend it never happened.

Good night.

You know, thank you.

It's depressed.

I think he looks like a dog.

Whatever he's feeling can be solved by sleeping,

eating, and pooping or destroying a pair of my shoes.

What's got them so interested?

I have no idea.

It looks like you have the flu.

So, you and Louisa, huh?

I beg your pardon.

I mean, I get why you like her.

She's a ray of sunshine.

But you, you're okay.

So you and Doc Martin, huh?

I did not see that coming.

Like at all.

Excuse me?

So to manage your flu symptoms, you need to

hydrate and take pain relievers, isn't it?

You know, who needs pain relievers right now?

Sheriff Mark, whoops!

Come on up high, baby.

Up high, yes.

I think it's great.

Lock and come at any age, you know.

What?

It's the flu, Mr. Collins.

Any questions?

Who initiated the kiss?

How passionate are we talking?

How did he kiss?

I picture a turtle eating a piece of notice.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Absolutely not.

What's this?

Take it.

Your car's parked in the red.

I parked exactly where I always have since I got here.

I turned a blind eye before, but those days are over.

Mark, it's for $50.

Let me just go out and move it.

Sorry.

Some mistakes can't be just moved back.

What?

What?

Mark says, why do you go out giving tickets like this?

Since when do you care nothing about rules and decency?

Okay, I have no idea what's going on right now.

Yeah, me neither.

Not after what I saw in the parking lot of the hospital.

Wait, what?

You saw that?

Yeah.

It might not be a crime, but it doesn't make it right.

You want me to close the door?

You don't have to.

What are you doing here?

You don't have to flue like everyone else, do you?

Nope.

But what we're around town, though, is that you and a certain... Not you, too.

This is a nightmare.

Is there a privacy anywhere?

Important when.

Not really.

So, what happened?

Nothing.

I'd find after a very long day tending to put a crime together.

The natural bond people feel in a crisis spoiled over.

And you and Louisa kissed.

Well, good for you.

You've been carrying a torch for us since you laid eyes on her.

What did you do wrong?

Nothing.

Why do you assume that I... Come on, what?

Nothing.

Tell me.

No.

Martin.

I may have suggested that we pretend it never happened.

Oh, my God.

Why?

Spares both the trouble, Mike.

Martin, is that how you really feel about love?

Or are we just trying to blow the whole thing

up to protect yourself so you wouldn't get hurt?

Well, by the way, Barry and Sensitive, you're going to have to apologize for that.

A-sap.

I have to go see George and Greg.

Apologize, Martin.

Mrs. Michelle.

You can call me Savannah.

You have fever, aches, and fatigue.

Sounds like the flu.

Are you sure we shouldn't be talking about that little patient?

He's running on a very low frequency.

No idea what that means.

Your dog is depressed, obviously.

For starters, he's not my dog.

I'm with the patient.

Please go now.

Elaine!

Open.

What?

Get him out of here.

Come on.

Come on.

We have a little fever.

Let's nodes are inflamed.

Okay, just FYI.

Understanding animals is literally my job.

Oh, yeah, and which job is that?

I own a traveling petting zoo.

And in my expert opinion... Oh, expert, really?

Is there a petting zoo collard somewhere?

It's called nature.

I'm sorry.

Do you see that?

Seriously, not see how sad your dog is.

Thank you, random zookeeper person, but what's coming out of your bag?

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Got it.

Please, just as I suspected.

Please.

That's it.

I'm out of here.

Sorry, please are a public health hazard.

And as much as I hate to say this, which is a lot until we

can prove we're not carrying them out, no one can leave.

Oh, my God.

I am torching this place on Yelp.

The gossip about Mark and I had to finally die down

and know where everybody is talking about me again.

People are awful, so nosy.

No boundaries at all.

Thank you.

Thank you.

What did happen?

Was it really just a kiss?

I bet Dr. Fussy pants is a real tiger into that suit.

Well, I hope you're... me.

This feels excessive.

No, of course you saw the shower with dishwashing soap was excessive.

Again, dishwashing soap kills fleas as does putting your clothes in the dryer.

It would be done soon.

How soon?

Today's the deadline to turn in my audition for Juilliard Alice recording at later.

So I really need to move this along.

Audition, huh?

What model are you doing?

I'm a Thespian myself.

That's right.

Yeah, you were so great as the mad scientist in the blood factory.

Oh, stop, stop.

I'm still working on my monologues.

Well, break a leg as we act as say.

I put the clothes in the dryer 37 minutes to go.

Feel free to check if they're done.

Oh, answer the phone.

Show up on time.

Now I have to vacuum and do laundry.

We're not gonna become Act 1 Cinderella.

If I were to let her to Juilliard, do you think you could start tomorrow?

All right.

I can't even have a personal moment with someone

without the whole town blabbing about it.

I know.

I'm so sorry about Greg.

He really should have known better.

I'm just gonna stay in here and avoid people like that.

Oh, my gosh, his little planes are like crazy.

Would you like a phone?

No, thanks.

I just don't know how everybody knows already.

That is my question.

Well, maybe Martin told someone.

Doesn't seem like the bragging type.

He definitely wasn't something to brag about.

Really?

Why?

Never mind.

I don't know why I would be interested.

I just don't know how else.

Everyone knows so fast.

No?

Guess I should call him.

Can I have that?

Oh, yeah.

Of course.

Of course.

You sure you don't want me to get you a spoon?

Okay.

Hello?

Did you tell someone about what happened between us?

Because everybody at the salty breeze knows.

Of course not.

I would never.

It was Mark, but apparently he saw us.

Mark?

Saw us?

Mm-hmm.

Oh, God.

Oh, God.

Uh, this is a disaster.

Mark saw us and everybody's talking.

So much for pretending it never happened, huh?

Yes.

So about that.

Oh, gosh.

He is.

Where are you doing here?

I'm sorry.

Where are you right now?

Hiding in the walk-in.

So, you know, I'm super happy about how this is working out.

Well, uh, I hit the infested my office with fleas.

Okay.

Stay warm in there.

Yeah.

Good luck with the fleas.

Mm-hmm.

Mark.

That was hard.

Mm-hmm.

All right, everyone, please get on your clothes

and then leave as soon as humanly possible.

I think it's strange feeling I've had this conversation before.

Oh, are you like a psychic?

In case you have who can be assigned.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Let's see you.

Oh, it's okay.

It's okay.

It's okay.

Everybody stay put.

Hey.

Is he texting?

Is he texting?

No one can leave.

Why?

What's the problem this time?

Don't panic.

But this woman has lesions that look like e-bose.

It's a moo-boo, moo-boomer.

What the hell is a booboo?

Doc, she has the plate.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

I can't have everyone's attention.

I can't breathe.

The plate is closing my door.

It's definitely not.

The health authorities are sending a biohazard team for Savannah, but they're

coming from Boston, so it's going to be a while.

The plate could probably kill all the old people first, right?

Coolish question, but brings me to my next point.

This type of plague doesn't spread easily from person

to person, but from fleas and infected animals.

And if antibiotics are taken within the first 24 hours, out comes very good.

It kind of sounds like if that bio, whatever team

doesn't get here in 24 hours, we're all screwed.

Yeah, screwed is in dead.

Wait, so you're the only doctor?

There isn't anybody better who knows how to deal with diseases?

Well, I went to medical school, so I like no-about diseases.

But yes, I'm it.

But we're fine.

No need to panic.

And again.

Doc, what are you doing?

Looking for clues as to where Savannah and her flea-ridden purse have been.

Damn it.

What?

She was at the salty breeze, which means people over there have been exposed,

and I need to get in touch with them.

We don't have to change back into the little gowns, do we?

Because if I'm gonna die of the plague, you're not.

I'm dying with my pants on.

Savannah, what was that?

Hey, guys.

What you want to talk to me about?

Well, wait a minute.

What's going on back here?

The claims he found a baby fox and is nursing a back to health.

I wish he'd take it somewhere else.

It's making brisket very anxious.

I get that kind of a rabbit-eared devil chihuahua.

Makes me a little nervous too.

Listen, Sarah, you have a small confession to make.

You cheated poker night.

You say, I don't know.

Oh, but not that.

Where are the ones showing your house?

What?

Your brother saw that Greg is a real true in the area and asked

us to convince you to accept his offer since we're friends.

Oh, some friends, you are.

Did he tell you what the terms of his offer is?

Sell a house out from under me and I get 20%.

Thank you so much, your lordship.

We thought at least if it was us, we'd look after your best interest.

Yes.

By kicking me out of my own house.

Listen, I hate to bring it up, but your brother says

you don't have much by way of retirement savings.

Yeah, well, you know how it is, lobstering.

You have a good year, and then a bad one.

So maybe you should let us show the house.

There's a couple of ones to see it today.

Fine.

Fine.

So... Any intel on what happened between Louisa and your nephew?

She's hiding in the walk-in right now.

Very upset.

You are not getting the hot goss.

You two are off the hot goss list.

Why me?

You could up with that.

You could stay on.

Hello.

And Sarah, listen.

There could be a crisis at the salty breeze.

Oh, you bet there is.

Louisa is hiding in the walk-in refrigerator.

When you got to apologize to her.

Never mind that.

A patient here, a woman named Savannah.

She was recently at the salty breeze, and she's exhibiting plague-like symptoms.

The plague?

Like... Bring out your dead?

That plague?

Bring it all the way down.

It's fine.

Bubonic, yes, the very one.

Wait.

What's that behind you?

Oh, that's got a baby fox, don't ask.

Hold the phone closer to it?

Sure.

Greg, stay here, please.

Look at those ears.

That's a North African Finneck fox.

Doug, where did you get one of those?

Funny story.

Wow, what's wrong with him?

For starters, his face is in a bowl of oatmeal.

Now, pull them out and make sure he's breathing.

Okay.

Whoa!

Hold the phone closer.

Let me see his neck.

Oh, good Lord.

What are those?

Do you promise to remain calm?

Wait.

This is the place.

I didn't know what I'm here today.

Excuse me?

Everyone listen up.

What do we do?

A biohazard team is coming.

Until you have all been tested, and the plague has

been ruled out, no one should leave the salty breeze.

Understood?

But we can still take walk-ins, right?

What are you doing here?

Bringing people something to eat, because I knew you wouldn't think about

that, because you don't think about people or their feelings.

Mark, Mark, we haven't had a chance to fumigate since you left, just some vacuuming.

So congratulations.

You've now potentially exposed yourself to plague-carrying fleas.

It's probably fine.

Well, now you can't leave until you've been cleared by the health authorities.

Good.

Okay.

Mark, would you like to talk?

No.

Yes.

I would like to talk.

Is there anything you'd like to say to me?

It actually makes sense?

Nope.

I got nothing to say to you, man.

Okay, fine.

And you can go back out.

Okay, I actually do have a couple questions.

Well, that should be fun.

How long has it been going on between you and Louisa?

Have you been dating all this time and just laughing at me behind my back?

Are you sure you're going to get married and

have little doctorate schoolteacher babies?

Are you hoping that I die?

So you guys can just dance on my grade.

Mark, Mark, I assure you, Louisa and I were not and are not together.

So if we're done here, I have a plague outbreak to deal with.

Yeah, but you didn't say that you won't be together, okay?

Because I can just see through that little game of yours, you are not going to seek

the future, best share of Mark, my love.

I go into the walk-in for an hour and come out to the literal plague.

Yeah, I make sure, thank those of you about our mortality.

Nice to think about getting our affairs in order

updating our wills, double checking the DNR.

Boring.

Right.

Who wants a shot on the house?

No, I'm talking.

Oh, sure.

First sign of a crisis and everyone drinks for free.

Well, if we're going to die, let's die at a party.

This is my kind of plague.

Free booze with my special lady.

But what I'm talking about.

Let's tell us the living life to the fullest.

So no regrets?

You do not recessive.

Oh, sure.

The plague?

Are you serious?

It's a possibility.

But we caught it early and we're treating it with antibiotics, so you should be okay.

Wow.

You know, I had my cards read recently.

And the reader said that something bad or not so bad could or could not happen.

And now look at this.

It's crazy, right?

You better not be interrogating someone

because I'm the one who does the interrogating.

Who are you?

Who asked the questions here?

Go ahead.

Ask your questions.

Doug, over at the Salty Breeze, has been exhibiting similar symptoms.

Have you had any recent interactions with him?

Doug?

Doug.

Dougie.

Doug.

No.

That name does not ring a bell.

I don't believe you.

I don't believe anyone anymore.

You know, stop trusting and you start resting.

Think about it.

Have you been a broad lately?

You know what?

Actually.

And I did go to Morocco recently for a yoga retreat.

And last day.

And that's where you got the Fennick Fox?

What's the Fennick Fox?

And anyway, it's probably just like a regular Fox, but with bigger ears.

You just said you didn't know what a Fennick Fox was.

So how would you know that Fennick Fox is that

big ears if you don't know what a Fennick Fox is?

Don't you lie to me, Savannah.

Okay.

Thank you for your help, Mark.

I'll take it from him.

Okay.

Hey.

I think I rounded her cage and pretty good.

She's gonna crack.

I don't know.

Hey.

But I'm still mad.

Okay.

Thank you.

I'm still mad.

Okay.

I got it.

Thanks, Mark.

I got it.

Wow.

There's some roiling tension between you two.

Let's go on on there.

Just admit you smuggled the Fennick Fox and sold it to Doug.

So I don't have to bring back the emotionally unstable sheriff.

Okay.

Fine.

But if you think you can make a living, charging

five-year-old's trite ponies, think again.

I don't think that.

I don't know why anyone would think that.

But the Fox you trafficked.

I call it exotic animal real me.

Whatever.

It likely has plague-carrying fleas that multiplied and migrated to the other

animals in your zoo and then spread to you and not a duck.

Look, I'm not a monster, okay?

I'm just trying to find loving homes for these animals.

They carry stress in their bodies just like we do.

You really feel like you're holding onto a lot of stress, too, my dude.

The only way to let go of stress is to open up.

Well, I wouldn't open up too much unless you have a lawyer present.

Now, if you excuse me, I need to let the town know about the mess you've made.

Elaine, we need to make a PSA.

What?

A public search.

A video telling the community what's going on.

Okay, we'll post it to your social media.

Oh, now you like my social media.

Elaine, please.

I would grant never making time to visit my sister in Florida.

You called your sister, and I quote, a joyless

iguana with a shard and nape for our blood.

I also regret trusting Joyce to keep our conversations private.

What about you, Lisa?

Is there anything or anyone you'd be sad to miss out on?

Really, really.

With everything that's going on this is what you're focused on?

Our school is closing, which is a huge blow to port when not to mention my career.

I mean, I have no idea what's happening in my life next.

Oh, oh, we might all have a disease that killed half of medieval Europe.

So, you know, sure, we can just discuss my weird kiss with the town doctor.

When you say, we... You're a hillside already done.

Ah!

Port wind is a fishbowl, and I'm tired of being a goldfish.

Are we recording?

Yes.

Are you looking at the... Okay, ready?

A go.

Hello.

Dr. Martin Best, here in Port Wind, where we appear to be having...

having an outbreak of bubonic plague.

Now, there's no cause for panic, but if you're experiencing flu-like

symptoms, along with painful swelling in your neck, armpits, or groin area,

or unusual lesions or sores, please come see

me or another health care provider immediately.

Just because I suck at the doctor's office,

don't get any ideas about committing any crimes.

Please share this post widely, Elaniacs, who could save a life.

She's saying you may have a while, or as if she is hoping to, like... Elaniacs?

She's worse than the plague.

Let those three die.

Yeah, question.

Shouldn't we consider other disease vectors like dirt?

I hate the internet.

Hello?

Hey, no, don't stay there.

Don't play?

Are you okay?

Yeah, I don't know.

This is weird, but I'm fine.

I... I... I have brought you lunch.

Thank you.

Uh-huh.

My present is too.

I'll take it.

His were very dry.

Hey, listen, so I speed read this acting book, and

it's had to track the emotional beats of Elaniacs.

I got to your model, and I started tracking the emotional beats of Elaniacs.

I... I... I don't think a money gets to it.

What?

You have to.

I... I looked at... and there... there's no extension.

Well, you have to do it today.

El... Look around.

I'm in a crisis.

I was thinking we could... We could shoot you to the window.

Seriously, just let it go.

Okay?

No.

Look, this is all you talk about.

Why don't you go to school in New York City.

Okay?

Let me help.

I don't want your help.

Okay?

If you like the idea of school in New York so much, you can go.

Bye.

Bye.

Leave the lunch.

Are you guys fighting?

Thank you.

Cheers.

We're a woman in a plague house.

You're looking awfully pleased with yourselves.

I'm feeling very pleased with my life.

Plus, you're stuck here with me, so you can't show my house.

What?

No such luck.

You have someone showing it for us.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh man, Collins.

Damn, I got all.

Stop!

You good?

Whoa.

That was really out of it.

I've got something really important to tell you when it might be scary.

I'm not going to be a dad.

Am I?

What?

Oh, I don't know.

You might have the plague.

The bubonic plague?

Mm-hmm.

How did I get that?

Doc said it must be some animals owned by some woman named Savannah.

Oh, no.

Savannah's got the plague.

Where is she?

Doc Martin's office, why?

She needs me.

Doug, stop with me.

I was supposed to leave.

Hi, Jim.

Hello?

Jeb, it's Sarah.

I can't talk now.

I'm showing a house for Ken.

You mean Greg?

Yeah, Greg.

Listen, could you do me a favor?

Where is she?

Where's Savannah?

Whoa, slow your road, Chief.

Doug, what are you doing?

You shouldn't be running around town with a plague-infested creature.

Don't you call my Savannah that?

I'm talking about...

Wait.

Your Savannah?

Have you and Savannah been into me?

That's a clinical way to put it.

That's Doc.

No heart.

Clop at marketing.

Period.

Go on.

I met her on a website for enthusiasts of unusual pets, but I only took a few

encrypted texts for me to realize that she's my soulmate.

That's what you said about my wife.

Oh, hey, Gil.

Good to see you, man.

So the answer is yes.

You two have been into me.

Come with me.

Savannah, my love.

That's not go crazy.

Are most of your painful lesions in your groin area?

Oh, yeah, do you want us to?

Nope, nope.

I take your word for it.

Right.

Now, you might actually have a sexually transmitted infection

called LGV, which has similar symptoms to the plague.

I'll spend that guy from Bonero.

Luckily, it too can be treated with a course of antibiotics.

Sorry, Doug.

One.

Doc, your last girlfriend gave you breasts.

This one gave you a disease similar to the plague.

As your physician, I feel compelled to say, make better dating choices.

I gotta say the vibe of the salty breeze was way better.

Elaine, we need to make another post.

All right.

Mm-hmm.

Hello, everyone.

This is Portland Public Safety Officer, Elaine.

Not your title.

With an important update.

Hi, everyone.

Dr. Best here.

So the situation is evolving.

And we're still waiting for the biohazard team to arrive to confirm.

But at the moment, my assessment is we are not having a plague outbreak in Portland.

Thank you.

But still don't commit any crimes.

Doc, have you ever thought about being a hair model?

Because the camera actually loves your hair.

What?

Who loves it?

Hey, if it's not the plague, what do you think it is?

I can't say.

Confidentiality.

What do you bet many diseases that have plague-like symptoms?

Yikes.

That looks uncomfortable.

So good news.

Martin just posted another video saying that it

looks like there's no plague outbreak after all.

So all we have to do is just hang out here for

a little bit longer, get tested just to be sure.

That's great.

You seem less than thrilled.

Hey.

I just feel disappointed about where my life is right now.

Well, this may be controversial given the day that we've had.

But when I'm feeling well, do you know what makes me feel better?

Besides, umbrella's and drinks.

Okay, then I give up.

I'm watching animal videos.

Huh?

Not what I was expecting.

And otters holding pause while they float on their backs.

Pudgy mama is doing goofy mama things in the airplane metals.

My favorite is this wolf dead in the katia.

I defy you not to be transported.

This is a twist.

Should we watch once?

I mean, after that, how could we not?

You know I got a cute up already.

I'm serious.

Okay, here we go.

Yeah.

Okay.

That is wolf blitzer.

We love him.

And this one...

So... No.

Is this a bad choice?

No, no, no.

It's perfect.

Yeah.

Okay.

Just watch this the right way.

Okay.

So I said, that's wolf blitzer.

Wolf blitzer.

And we don't like that.

Okay.

But we love wolf blitzer.

We love wolf blitzer.

Okay.

Sorry to intrude.

But I'm sensing some inner tension.

Whoa, you really are psychic.

People do say that.

But really we're all just animals who think we're

better at hiding around stress than we actually are.

I've barely worked on my audition.

I don't know.

I'm like too scared, I guess.

Fear of failure.

I get that.

I hate of taking tests in school.

Why do you think I turned to a life of crime?

Oh, the dark.

Yes, this is crazy.

I hate dating.

So hot.

Actually, I'm more afraid of success.

I mean, what if I crush this audition?

And Juilliard is like holy crap we have literally never seen anyone act so good.

Then he moved to New York City and you follow your dreams?

Barf, so basic.

Do you mind?

Then I would have to leave Al behind.

Is Al your boyfriend?

You know, we have this idea that life has to be either or.

But we can only have one good thing.

But what if the universe is like, no?

You can have all the good things.

So I could have Al and Juilliard?

Or in my case, beat this crazy STD in the

federal wildlife animal charges that I'm facing.

Yeah, no fingers crossed for the both of those.

I saw your video.

Hey, no offense, buddy, but you're not looking too good right now.

Um, Doc?

London, you shouldn't be here.

Oh, I'm growing nipples.

On my neck.

Okay, maybe you should.

Have you had intimate contact with this woman?

Doug or both?

Are you suggesting I had some kind of woo-woo-woo three-way with those weirdos?

Hell, now.

Rules out of the STD.

I got it.

Have you visited the petting zoo, maybe?

I mean, I don't think so.

This isn't a hard question.

I might have taken my son.

Isn't Glen and Jr. like 17.

Fine.

I went alone.

I like petting the gods.

So, is it?

Exposure?

Viewbows?

We might be looking at a plague outbreak after all.

Yeah.

I concur.

Hey, Doc, bad news.

Biohazard team got a fender bender and said

they're going to be delayed by a couple of hours.

Okay, didn't you say the longer it takes those

guys to get their the more dangerous it gets?

Great.

Now I have to text my mom back and tell her I am going to die.

It makes a lot.

Nobody is going to die.

Okay, we just need to stay calm and in control of the situation.

Is that clear?

Um, has anyone seen the fox?

What?

My mom was right.

I lack the emotional maturity to own a pet.

You need to find that fox.

You're going to be fine.

But if you need to pet a baby, go.

Oh, shut up.

Doc, we're not more incoming.

I'm not feeling so hot.

I'm like, is this the plague?

My daughter's like, go find out, dummy.

I just feel like ass.

You know, a good general all over assiness.

Mark, text your mom at the pharmacy.

Tell her we need more antibiotics, rabbit

flu tests, any IV bags you may have on hand.

Have her leave them out front and then go run down and get them.

Got it?

Oh, no problem.

Elaine, we need to update the public.

Excuse me.

Dr. Best here.

Small update on the previous update.

But... Not... You.

Yes.

To reiterate, please disregard my previous post.

We are having an outbreak of plague here in Fortnite.

Also, Al, if you're watching, I am sorry that I was so crabby.

That was not about you.

I do want to go for it and I really need your help.

Okay.

First, we're going to die.

And we're not going to die.

Now we're back to dying.

Make up your mind already.

Will you, Doc?

Ooh.

That guy sucks.

We're all symptom free for now, so I think we should just...

What?

Stay calm.

I'm calm.

I'm calm.

What is?

It's Greg's real estate firm.

Hi, Greg Garrison Realty.

This is Greg speaking.

How may I help you find the home of your dreams?

I see.

Well, that is... Okay.

Well, thank you very much.

Who was that?

The buyer is looking at Sarah's house.

Jeb Collins told him the house was full of fleas with plague.

I wonder why he would do that.

Pete's me.

Oh, fine.

I paid him off to bed now that he excused me.

If I'm going to die of the plague, I want to do it in my own house.

Nobody's pushing me out.

Well, except possibly death.

Right.

Point taken.

You know what I think we could all use right now?

We'll have to do it.

We'll have to do it.

Oh, yes.

You fired up.

Okay.

Did you get the antibiotics?

Yeah, I got you.

Sorry, y'all.

All right.

Okay, everybody, listen up.

We're having a lot of people come in right now not feeling well.

Now, most of you probably just have the flu, but some of you might have the plague.

So here's what we're going to do.

Who here is having fever, aches, and fatigue.

Okay.

And you're going to take rapid flu tests out here in the waiting room.

Now, who has swollen lymph nodes under your chin, possibly in your armpit or groin?

Okay, if you have any of those, you're going to come into

the exam room or need to give you antibiotics right away.

Now, you are not contagious, and we will take care of you.

I'm just here for nighttime gas.

Note it.

Let's go.

Ow, what are you doing here?

Do you have plague symptoms?

I don't care about the plague.

Famous last words.

Came back.

Thank you.

I'm so sorry, honestly.

I was just afraid of my own awesomeness.

I forgive you, but we have to move fast.

We only have a couple hours until the deadline.

All right?

Did you remember I was your speech?

Yeah, my fuck.

Sick.

I have no idea what time it means.

Okay.

Who wants to be in a movie?

Or a very low-budget audition video?

No, I might be available.

You're not thinking of doing this in here, are you?

Why not?

I'll go deal with the plague while you put on your little show.

Hi.

I'm Elaine Denton, and I will be performing Olga's monologue from Anton

Chekov's Three Sisters, which is a play that I have read.

It almost seems as if a minute more.

And we'll know why we live.

And why we suffer.

If only we knew.

If only we knew.

What difference does it make?

What difference does it make?

If only we knew.

And cut.

Elaine, you're so good.

Should I take my line again?

No.

I think we got it.

Oh, my goodness.

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

The mother-child bonded so primal, so deep.

I mean, why would a lady wolf ever not want to have that experience?

The guy will come and go, but the bond here wolf baby, that's forever.

I mean, not having a wolf cub.

I mean, she probably regret that for the rest of her wolf life.

What?

Are you wanting a wolf cub?

What?

No.

Why would you?

I mean, maybe.

Okay, I don't know.

I'm going to say something to you if I'm overstepping, tell me to buzz off.

If you ever decide to have a baby on your own, it will be there for you.

Cooking, babysitting, whatever you need.

We'll all be there for you.

You know, coolers, all of us.

Oh, honey.

Sunny, even when nosey and annoying with your friends.

You guys.

It took you a while.

Everyone in this room needs to be tested along with a few people down the street.

Understood.

We've already got team members over there.

We'll get a testing station set up ASAP.

Coming back.

First, I want you to check on my patients with lesions.

Some of the ones out here might have the plague.

Some of them might just have the flu.

But everyone out here needs rapid tests for plague.

Okay, folks.

I'm headed home soon as they clear me.

Oh, okay, I can sleep it up.

Same in my nerves as a shot.

You could settle them by helping me prep for tomorrow.

Sweetie, after the day I've had, I'm in Bath and an Aptaritizer.

Am I crazy to say today was fun?

Yes.

On first, we're dying, then we're not dying, then we're dying.

Now we're not dying.

Now the drink, anybody.

Tranks on the house.

Let me crawl down and we'll control real quick.

Oh, hey, thanks, Doc.

You know, despite being trapped in the paradigm of Western medicine, I would have

been in real trouble if I hadn't come to you.

I think you are in real trouble.

Your fox did give six of our townspeople the plague.

Yeah, well, if I may, I think your dog is sad,

because he doesn't know where he stands with you.

He's like, am I a dog, or am I not?

He's not.

I don't believe you.

And neither does your dog.

You know, you should admit that you actually

care about whoever it is that you care about.

Please to yourself.

Uh-huh.

You should pursue a therapy degree while you're in jail.

Maybe I will.

Anyway.

Thanks, Doc.

Hey, do you know any lawyers?

Hi, Sarah.

Vice of the end.

It's always like that.

Oh, you're not even going to apologize.

Look, Mark, I understand you're upset, but I don't know what I actually did.

Am I your friend?

Excuse me?

Do you consider me your friend?

Yes.

Okay.

Well, when you're friends with someone, and you start having feelings for the

erects, you gotta give them a heads-up, Doc.

It was just something that happened, Doc.

Oh, no.

Oh, I know.

Like, I go one time.

He did the moment type thing.

Oh, man, nothing.

Huh.

Huh.

Come on.

He kissed Louisa, and you think he meant nothing.

He's not just lying to me, buddy.

You're lying to yourself.

I'll see you later, okay.

Thanks for meeting me.

Sure.

I mean, what a day.

In fact, it gave me a lot to think about.

About what?

Um...

What are the odds of an exotic animal, not even from the continent, showing up in

a small town and causing an outbreak of plague?

Wait, wait, what?

Low.

Oh.

Very low, vanishingly low.

And there are lots of things about life that

I might not understand as well as I thought.

I don't know why I sometimes say obnoxious things.

Martin, you don't know.

You know, another surprising thing about life is that sometimes

other things with incredibly low odds can also happen.

Nice things.

Things between two people.

Are these...

I've been thinking, too.

Yeah, that's fine.

I think this town is too small for us to date.

Even if it were a good idea, which I don't think that it is.

Oh.

You're a great guy.

Oh, you don't believe in anything.

No, I just...

And we have this crazy push and pull, which is exciting and also frustrating.

And I just don't think I have a bunch of time for a lot of drama right now because

I want to have a baby.

Okay, now with you.

Not what I was saying, just a baby.

I wish you luck with that.

I do.

I love you.

How good are you?

Okay.

Okay, Copernicus.

Let's go for a walk.

We're getting a sister city from Norway.

Next Tuesday.

Dr. Best, such an honor.

Will these out of towners?

Why are they trying so hard?

I don't trust them.

Change board went forever.

I want people to know the truth about our guests.

Oh, my God.

All new best medicine.

Next Tuesday on Fox.

At least I'm a thermic.

One of us is going to need to go for home.

I'll do it.

So no signal.

Doc, all new.

Next on Fox.