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Subtitles downloaded from Podnapisi.NET
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Mark O'Brien has been going
to UC Berkeley since 1978.
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That's O'Brien in the motorized gurney
heading for class last week.
4
00:01:01,120 --> 00:01:03,202
He had polio
when he was six years old.
5
00:01:03,360 --> 00:01:07,001
The disease left his body crippled,
but his mind remained sharp and alert.
6
00:01:07,160 --> 00:01:08,924
And since he wanted to be a writer...
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00:01:09,080 --> 00:01:13,404
...Mark O'Brien entered Cal
to major in English and learn his trade.
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He wrote this poem for us about school
here and about graduation.
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"Graduation."
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Today I hear the crowd's applause
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Receive congratulations from my friends
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Today I ask if I've found
a place among the rest
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Who studied, read, wrote
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And passed the test in cap and gown.
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Today I hope you see a man upon this stage.
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Mark O'Brien teaches us that courage
and perseverance overcome obstacles.
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With Mark O'Brien at UC Berkeley...
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00:01:53,360 --> 00:01:56,489
...Bill Hillman,
Channel 5 Eyewitness News.
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00:02:31,000 --> 00:02:32,843
"Breathing."
20
00:02:33,760 --> 00:02:35,524
Look, you
21
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This most excellent canopy, the air
22
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Presses down upon me
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00:02:41,200 --> 00:02:44,170
At fifteen pounds per square inch
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A dense, heavy, blue glowing ocean
25
00:02:48,520 --> 00:02:52,081
Teasing me with its nearness and immensity
26
00:02:52,240 --> 00:02:55,642
And all I get is a thin stream of it
27
00:02:55,800 --> 00:03:01,523
A finger's width of the
rope that ties me to life
28
00:03:14,680 --> 00:03:16,330
Shit.
29
00:03:16,600 --> 00:03:19,524
Okay, just focus.
30
00:03:19,720 --> 00:03:22,121
Scratch with your mind.
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Okay, your mind.
32
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Scratch with your mind.
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00:03:40,400 --> 00:03:41,811
Good morning.
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00:04:06,400 --> 00:04:08,482
Good morning.
35
00:04:08,680 --> 00:04:10,409
You're late.
36
00:04:18,520 --> 00:04:20,284
"Joan."
37
00:04:20,720 --> 00:04:24,247
I swear this was one crazy bitch
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00:04:24,400 --> 00:04:27,210
Who'd swing me about enough to scare me
39
00:04:27,360 --> 00:04:29,283
But careful enough so she could say:
40
00:04:29,440 --> 00:04:32,091
"Now what was all the yelling about?"
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00:04:32,240 --> 00:04:36,290
"You polios are screamers. Always were. "
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00:04:37,080 --> 00:04:39,128
I didn't say a word.
43
00:04:39,280 --> 00:04:42,409
I typed my skinny novel in my head
44
00:04:42,560 --> 00:04:45,211
And thought about revenge.
45
00:04:59,680 --> 00:05:01,569
Would you mind if I asked you
a favor?
46
00:05:02,480 --> 00:05:04,608
What, you need help moving furniture?
47
00:05:07,840 --> 00:05:09,683
I need an advance on my pay.
48
00:05:09,840 --> 00:05:11,490
Like, two weeks.
49
00:05:12,280 --> 00:05:15,045
Now, that's not exactly
asking too much, is it?
50
00:05:15,200 --> 00:05:18,363
What if you don't last
another two weeks?
51
00:05:20,280 --> 00:05:24,569
It was a real drag that I was no longer
allowed to use my other gurney.
52
00:05:24,760 --> 00:05:26,762
The self-propelled one.
53
00:05:26,920 --> 00:05:30,527
It had caused a couple
of spectacular accidents.
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00:05:30,720 --> 00:05:35,931
Basically, in spite of all the mirrors,
I couldn't see where I was going.
55
00:05:37,040 --> 00:05:42,843
Mary's fear and apprehension
slowly gave way to pride and purpose.
56
00:05:43,000 --> 00:05:45,128
Elizabeth, pregnant
herself with Saint John...
57
00:05:45,320 --> 00:05:48,642
...felt the power of this wondrous woman.
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00:05:48,800 --> 00:05:52,327
It was Elizabeth, and her absolute faith...
59
00:05:52,480 --> 00:05:55,802
...that gave Mary
the courage she was lacking.
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00:05:56,000 --> 00:06:00,210
And she gave thanks, saying,
my soul doth magnify the Lord...
61
00:06:00,360 --> 00:06:04,524
...and my spirit hath rejoiced
in God, my savior.
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00:06:04,680 --> 00:06:08,571
May the spirit of the Lord be amongst you
and remain with you always.
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00:06:08,760 --> 00:06:10,330
Amen.
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00:06:10,680 --> 00:06:16,369
I'm definitely a true believer, but
I believe in a God with a sense of humor.
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00:06:16,560 --> 00:06:18,801
A wicked sense of humor.
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00:06:18,960 --> 00:06:23,045
One who created me in his own image.
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00:06:23,200 --> 00:06:25,680
Hello. I don't think we've met.
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00:06:25,840 --> 00:06:26,887
I'm Father Brendan.
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00:06:31,560 --> 00:06:33,324
I'm Mark O'Brien.
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00:06:33,480 --> 00:06:36,165
I knew Father Seamus very well.
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00:06:36,320 --> 00:06:38,891
I'm sorry that he's not here any more.
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00:06:39,080 --> 00:06:42,129
As are many others.
I'll do my best to fill his shoes.
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00:06:42,280 --> 00:06:44,248
You'd like me to hear
your confession?
74
00:06:44,400 --> 00:06:45,640
Yes, I would.
75
00:06:45,840 --> 00:06:49,890
I told my attendant to come back
in half an hour. Is that okay?
76
00:06:50,320 --> 00:06:52,766
I'm in no rush.
I can be a bit time-consuming...
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00:06:52,920 --> 00:06:55,082
...but I'm worth the trouble.
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00:06:57,240 --> 00:06:59,242
I'm here for you, Mark.
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00:07:02,080 --> 00:07:03,684
Okay.
80
00:07:04,760 --> 00:07:09,448
This is not exactly a confession.
I haven't yet done the deed.
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00:07:10,040 --> 00:07:12,441
I was sort of hoping
to get a quote in advance.
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00:07:13,920 --> 00:07:15,001
What's on your mind?
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00:07:16,600 --> 00:07:20,241
The most immediate thing on my mind
would be one of my attendants.
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00:07:20,400 --> 00:07:22,050
Joan.
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00:07:22,200 --> 00:07:23,929
I'm thinking of getting rid of her.
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00:07:24,080 --> 00:07:27,971
It's an evil thought, but I can't help it.
Is she dishonest?
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00:07:28,120 --> 00:07:30,521
Or incompetent?
No. Neither of those.
88
00:07:30,720 --> 00:07:32,290
She looks at me the wrong way.
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00:07:33,200 --> 00:07:36,602
It's that "You need me
more than I need you" look.
90
00:07:36,760 --> 00:07:41,368
I'd like to show her she's wrong just for
the evil satisfaction it will give me.
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00:07:42,160 --> 00:07:44,527
Is that a sin, Father?
92
00:07:46,040 --> 00:07:47,644
Well, it obviously troubles you.
93
00:07:47,800 --> 00:07:53,045
Yeah, it troubles me a lot, because
what if it's really just a power trip?
94
00:07:53,240 --> 00:07:56,050
You know? Yeah, me against her?
95
00:07:56,240 --> 00:07:59,130
Me against the world?
I really wouldn't worry about that.
96
00:07:59,280 --> 00:08:02,409
The question is
whether you like having her around.
97
00:08:02,560 --> 00:08:05,484
I can't stand her.
Well, then get rid of her.
98
00:08:06,000 --> 00:08:08,810
If I were in a position to choose,
I'd find someone nice.
99
00:08:08,960 --> 00:08:10,485
Even if it was a power trip.
100
00:08:10,640 --> 00:08:14,008
Then I have your blessing to fire her?
101
00:08:14,160 --> 00:08:15,969
Unofficially, yes.
102
00:08:16,120 --> 00:08:17,690
That's good enough for me.
103
00:08:26,960 --> 00:08:28,405
Hey! Ha!
104
00:08:42,280 --> 00:08:44,248
"Amanda."
105
00:08:45,320 --> 00:08:47,891
Amanda would have been a pretty girl
106
00:08:48,040 --> 00:08:51,840
To touch, to hold, to kiss.
107
00:08:52,000 --> 00:08:54,287
Do you have any experience?
108
00:08:54,880 --> 00:08:56,484
No. None at all.
109
00:08:56,680 --> 00:08:59,160
That sounds perfect.
110
00:09:08,080 --> 00:09:10,560
So how long can you stay out?
111
00:09:10,720 --> 00:09:13,166
Three or four hours.
Yeah?
112
00:09:13,360 --> 00:09:16,011
Depends on how much fun I'm having.
113
00:09:16,400 --> 00:09:18,607
As she glided through crowds of lives
114
00:09:18,760 --> 00:09:21,240
She couldn't leave me lying there
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00:09:21,400 --> 00:09:22,640
Dried-out bubble gum
116
00:09:22,800 --> 00:09:24,882
Stuck on the underneath of existence.
117
00:09:26,960 --> 00:09:29,247
She took me on a picnic once
118
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With her boyfriend and another couple.
119
00:09:32,400 --> 00:09:35,370
Lust crackled in the air.
120
00:09:36,560 --> 00:09:38,085
And what did the boyfriend think?
121
00:09:39,560 --> 00:09:41,085
That I was in his way?
122
00:09:44,760 --> 00:09:47,445
I'm always in somebody's way, I thought
123
00:09:48,320 --> 00:09:50,766
The sun in my eyes.
124
00:09:56,400 --> 00:09:58,084
And?
125
00:09:59,240 --> 00:10:01,049
And what?
126
00:10:02,440 --> 00:10:05,091
And do you touch him?
What do you...? Yeah.
127
00:10:05,240 --> 00:10:06,730
I do everything.
128
00:10:07,280 --> 00:10:09,282
Do you have other questions?
129
00:10:10,240 --> 00:10:12,447
Gross.
What?
130
00:10:13,120 --> 00:10:14,565
What'd you say?
131
00:10:14,720 --> 00:10:18,520
Okay, look, no need to be defensive, okay?
I'm not exactly threatened by this guy.
132
00:10:18,720 --> 00:10:20,165
Yeah? Why not?
133
00:10:20,320 --> 00:10:23,051
God, he's much more a man
than you are.
134
00:10:27,200 --> 00:10:29,123
So, what does your boyfriend think of me?
135
00:10:29,280 --> 00:10:31,886
He's an asshole.
Doesn't matter what he thinks of you.
136
00:10:32,040 --> 00:10:35,328
I'm interested in the opinion
of an asshole.
137
00:10:35,680 --> 00:10:39,241
He thinks that you
are some kind of Svengali...
138
00:10:39,400 --> 00:10:42,165
...and that you're gonna hypnotize me
into your cult.
139
00:10:42,320 --> 00:10:43,970
He's right.
140
00:10:45,200 --> 00:10:48,170
He says he can already see changes.
141
00:10:51,200 --> 00:10:53,123
Her perfect, pale skin...
142
00:10:54,000 --> 00:10:56,480
...her Tudor court face...
143
00:10:56,640 --> 00:11:01,885
...her strong, fleshy legs
Drove me to ecstasies of despair.
144
00:11:02,040 --> 00:11:03,201
Want me to do that?
145
00:11:04,840 --> 00:11:08,401
All I wished for were hands that moved...
146
00:11:08,600 --> 00:11:11,001
...just to touch her.
147
00:11:11,160 --> 00:11:13,367
That would have been enough.
148
00:11:15,240 --> 00:11:19,529
So with a gentle, fearless
heart she took me in.
149
00:11:19,680 --> 00:11:22,251
I thrived in her garden...
150
00:11:22,400 --> 00:11:24,607
...and wanted more.
151
00:11:30,640 --> 00:11:32,608
Okay.
152
00:11:32,760 --> 00:11:35,570
Shirts, shirts, shirts.
153
00:11:36,040 --> 00:11:37,326
Oh.
154
00:11:39,600 --> 00:11:42,046
This you must have.
155
00:11:43,400 --> 00:11:46,051
What? What is it?
156
00:11:46,360 --> 00:11:48,806
I love you.
157
00:12:00,960 --> 00:12:02,371
Um...
158
00:12:08,240 --> 00:12:10,402
Did she reciprocate your feelings?
159
00:12:12,080 --> 00:12:13,241
She didn't seem to.
160
00:12:13,400 --> 00:12:16,244
Sometimes people can be very shy
about their emotions.
161
00:12:16,400 --> 00:12:20,564
Well, in case
she didn't get it the first time...
162
00:12:20,760 --> 00:12:25,322
...I told her again that I was in love
with her and I wanted to marry her.
163
00:12:25,480 --> 00:12:28,086
Thinking it might swing things.
Did it?
164
00:12:28,240 --> 00:12:29,605
Yeah.
165
00:12:29,760 --> 00:12:31,410
She left.
166
00:12:39,720 --> 00:12:42,564
Amanda could have been a pretty girl...
167
00:12:42,720 --> 00:12:47,282
...to touch, to hold, to take to bed.
168
00:12:49,800 --> 00:12:52,246
I wish I knew what to say to you.
169
00:12:52,720 --> 00:12:54,006
Welcome to the human race.
170
00:12:54,160 --> 00:12:56,970
Every day, somebody breaks
somebody else's heart.
171
00:12:59,280 --> 00:13:00,725
And as I said, I'm here for you.
172
00:13:00,920 --> 00:13:03,730
I just wish I had something
more useful to offer.
173
00:13:03,880 --> 00:13:06,451
All I have are these vague ideas
about life and death...
174
00:13:06,600 --> 00:13:08,728
...that we priests are equipped with.
175
00:13:08,880 --> 00:13:11,963
Have you considered
sharing your feelings with a therapist?
176
00:13:12,120 --> 00:13:13,485
Not really.
177
00:13:14,920 --> 00:13:16,604
Yeah? Father?
178
00:13:18,120 --> 00:13:19,724
I think I need a hug.
179
00:13:21,120 --> 00:13:22,485
A hug?
180
00:13:22,640 --> 00:13:24,130
Yeah.
181
00:13:27,600 --> 00:13:28,840
There you go.
182
00:13:41,640 --> 00:13:43,961
Hi. Vera?
Yes.
183
00:13:44,120 --> 00:13:45,645
Oh, hi, I'm Rod.
Hi.
184
00:13:45,840 --> 00:13:48,969
I... I usually do 4 to midnights...
185
00:13:49,320 --> 00:13:51,891
...but we could switch if necessary.
186
00:14:02,920 --> 00:14:04,843
Have you had any experience?
187
00:14:05,000 --> 00:14:06,809
Some.
188
00:14:11,200 --> 00:14:13,362
Would you get that, please?
189
00:14:19,360 --> 00:14:20,885
Hello.
190
00:14:23,520 --> 00:14:26,888
It's Sandy from Pacific News Service.
191
00:14:27,480 --> 00:14:31,724
Could you press that button
and put it on speakerphone, please?
192
00:14:35,200 --> 00:14:38,124
- Hi, Sandy.
- Hi, Mark. How you doing?
193
00:14:38,280 --> 00:14:39,850
I'm good.
194
00:14:40,000 --> 00:14:42,844
I have a new attendant.
She answered the phone.
195
00:14:43,000 --> 00:14:46,402
Her name's Vera.
Welcome, Vera.
196
00:14:47,280 --> 00:14:50,568
Thank you.
Mark, we're doing a series of articles...
197
00:14:50,720 --> 00:14:52,404
...that I think might interest you.
198
00:14:52,560 --> 00:14:55,086
The subject is sex and the disabled.
199
00:14:55,240 --> 00:14:58,687
It would involve interviewing people
in the Berkeley area.
200
00:14:58,840 --> 00:15:00,251
But why now?
201
00:15:00,400 --> 00:15:02,482
Because we've got the money now.
202
00:15:02,640 --> 00:15:06,042
But if you're working on something else,
then we can talk about it later.
203
00:15:10,400 --> 00:15:11,970
No.
204
00:15:12,120 --> 00:15:13,804
Now is fine.
205
00:15:13,960 --> 00:15:15,485
Great.
206
00:15:18,560 --> 00:15:21,040
There was no escaping it.
207
00:15:21,880 --> 00:15:25,601
A door had opened that I could not close.
208
00:15:26,760 --> 00:15:32,005
And in invisible writing,
it said, "Do not enter."
209
00:15:37,400 --> 00:15:40,244
Most positions like that one
are pretty much impossible.
210
00:15:40,400 --> 00:15:43,768
I don't know if you can quite visualize it,
but it's called a lateral...
211
00:15:43,960 --> 00:15:46,566
...or a sideways reverse cowgirl.
212
00:15:47,480 --> 00:15:51,769
It's okay. It's just a question of depth
of penetration for most people.
213
00:15:51,920 --> 00:15:55,083
Like my partner, for instance.
It doesn't really matter to me.
214
00:15:55,240 --> 00:15:57,811
I mean, I get just as excited
when he licks my nipples.
215
00:15:57,960 --> 00:15:59,450
When he bothers to do that.
216
00:16:03,600 --> 00:16:05,602
I think your tape's run out.
217
00:16:05,760 --> 00:16:07,762
Oh.
Oh.
218
00:16:15,480 --> 00:16:16,641
Do you want to continue?
219
00:16:17,520 --> 00:16:18,726
Uh...
220
00:16:19,120 --> 00:16:20,929
That's okay, Carmen.
221
00:16:21,120 --> 00:16:24,010
I think I've actually
got enough to work on.
222
00:16:24,160 --> 00:16:26,731
Thanks.
Well, give me a call if you need anything.
223
00:16:26,920 --> 00:16:31,130
Let me get you Greg's number. He's full of
things you wouldn't believe were possible.
224
00:16:31,280 --> 00:16:33,328
Oral sex is a matter of taste.
225
00:16:33,480 --> 00:16:35,926
And one thing that really works
in my favor...
226
00:16:36,080 --> 00:16:37,969
...is that I smoke so much weed...
227
00:16:38,120 --> 00:16:40,441
...that my taste buds are pretty jaded.
228
00:16:40,640 --> 00:16:43,769
This gives me a great deal of stamina
in the tongue department.
229
00:16:44,200 --> 00:16:46,851
And stamina is key in cunnilingus.
230
00:16:55,560 --> 00:16:58,006
Who are these people?
231
00:16:59,480 --> 00:17:03,690
I feel like an anthropologist
interviewing a tribe of headhunters.
232
00:17:08,120 --> 00:17:09,531
Hi.
233
00:17:09,920 --> 00:17:12,764
It's good to see you. How are things?
234
00:17:12,920 --> 00:17:15,571
Well...
Sorry.
235
00:17:16,360 --> 00:17:19,125
Things are a little confusing
at the moment.
236
00:17:19,280 --> 00:17:24,047
I would appreciate your advice as a friend,
if you know what I mean.
237
00:17:24,200 --> 00:17:27,568
Sure. And I understand what you mean.
238
00:17:29,720 --> 00:17:33,406
You remember at one point
you suggested I might see a therapist?
239
00:17:33,560 --> 00:17:35,244
Yes.
Well...
240
00:17:35,400 --> 00:17:40,725
...one way or another, it's a long story,
I ended up seeing a therapist.
241
00:17:41,360 --> 00:17:45,206
A particular sort of therapist.
242
00:17:45,880 --> 00:17:47,166
A sex therapist.
243
00:17:49,240 --> 00:17:52,483
Good morning, UC Berkeley.
May I please speak to someone...
244
00:17:52,640 --> 00:17:56,406
...in the Center for Sexuality
and Disability, please?
245
00:17:56,760 --> 00:18:01,687
I'm sorry, sir. The Center for Sexuality
and Disability has been shut down.
246
00:18:03,080 --> 00:18:05,401
Thank God.
Sir?
247
00:18:05,600 --> 00:18:07,489
I'm sorry to have bothered you.
248
00:18:07,640 --> 00:18:09,483
It's no bother.
249
00:18:09,720 --> 00:18:12,246
Oh, sir, before you go,
I can give you a phone number...
250
00:18:12,440 --> 00:18:14,841
...for one of the therapists
who used to work there.
251
00:18:15,000 --> 00:18:16,570
Would you like that?
252
00:18:16,720 --> 00:18:18,688
- It's not gonna fit.
- It's fine.
253
00:18:18,840 --> 00:18:22,242
- We got you. Everything's just fine.
- I don't like this. Let's forget it.
254
00:18:22,400 --> 00:18:24,209
Do you want to see this woman or not?
No!
255
00:18:24,360 --> 00:18:25,566
Oops. Too late.
What floor?
256
00:18:25,720 --> 00:18:27,768
Eighteenth floor.
Oh...
257
00:18:27,960 --> 00:18:29,769
So...
258
00:18:31,280 --> 00:18:33,089
...what sort of chance
do you give me?
259
00:18:33,240 --> 00:18:35,288
Of achieving your romantic fantasy?
260
00:18:35,440 --> 00:18:36,805
Very small to minute.
261
00:18:36,960 --> 00:18:40,931
Oh, look, you don't have to pull any
punches. You can be direct with me.
262
00:18:41,080 --> 00:18:43,526
Mark, I'm just a humble sex therapist.
263
00:18:43,720 --> 00:18:47,202
I try to help people with sex problems
that can be addressed.
264
00:18:47,600 --> 00:18:50,206
Your problem, I understand,
is that you've never had sex.
265
00:18:51,720 --> 00:18:52,881
That's correct.
266
00:18:53,040 --> 00:18:55,805
Would I be correct in assuming
you're unable to masturbate?
267
00:18:55,960 --> 00:18:58,088
Correct.
Has anyone done it for you?
268
00:18:58,280 --> 00:19:00,647
No.
Have you ever asked anyone?
269
00:19:00,800 --> 00:19:02,325
Not specifically.
270
00:19:02,480 --> 00:19:06,485
I asked someone to marry me once.
She declined.
271
00:19:06,640 --> 00:19:08,483
Does that come close to masturbation?
272
00:19:10,440 --> 00:19:13,364
You know,
being with the person you love...
273
00:19:13,520 --> 00:19:16,569
...is not the only way
of expressing yourself sexually.
274
00:19:16,720 --> 00:19:19,849
There are people called sex surrogates.
Oh?
275
00:19:21,360 --> 00:19:23,488
My penis speaks to me, Father Brendan.
276
00:19:24,680 --> 00:19:28,765
Sometimes I ejaculate during
a bed bath in front of my attendants.
277
00:19:28,920 --> 00:19:34,006
All I feel is shame and mortification while
other men apparently get pleasure. I...
278
00:19:34,760 --> 00:19:36,603
I'm sorry if I sound angry.
279
00:19:36,760 --> 00:19:38,808
Don't worry about it. Go on.
280
00:19:47,120 --> 00:19:49,202
This therapist...
281
00:19:49,720 --> 00:19:53,770
...suggested I could work
with a sexual specialist.
282
00:19:54,240 --> 00:19:56,891
Have sex with a person
known as a sex surrogate...
283
00:19:57,040 --> 00:20:00,647
...who would be sensitive
to my unusual needs.
284
00:20:00,840 --> 00:20:04,242
I've been giving it some thought.
Hold... Hold on.
285
00:20:04,400 --> 00:20:07,722
What do you mean, "have sex"?
Well, when a man and a woman...
286
00:20:07,880 --> 00:20:11,089
...love each other very much...
No, I understand what it...
287
00:20:11,480 --> 00:20:13,721
Are we talking about sexual intercourse?
288
00:20:15,240 --> 00:20:17,322
I think so.
Outside marriage?
289
00:20:17,480 --> 00:20:20,723
I did do my best
on the question of marriage.
290
00:20:23,080 --> 00:20:25,890
What's the difference
between this sexual specialist...
291
00:20:26,040 --> 00:20:27,565
...and a common prostitute?
292
00:20:27,720 --> 00:20:31,406
I don't know,
but I think there's a difference.
293
00:20:39,880 --> 00:20:41,882
How old are you?
Thirty-eight.
294
00:20:42,040 --> 00:20:43,326
Why exactly now?
295
00:20:43,480 --> 00:20:47,644
I never had any cash before,
that's a major factor.
296
00:20:48,240 --> 00:20:51,608
And I'm probably getting close
to my use-by date.
297
00:20:58,840 --> 00:21:02,561
And this is what you wanted
my advice on? Fornication.
298
00:21:02,720 --> 00:21:05,041
Your advice as a friend.
299
00:21:06,800 --> 00:21:09,121
Do I have the deciding vote, so to speak?
300
00:21:09,280 --> 00:21:12,921
Well, let's just say I value your advice
just as much as I do the therapist's.
301
00:21:15,920 --> 00:21:17,365
You're serious about this?
302
00:21:17,520 --> 00:21:20,171
I think sex is a serious matter.
303
00:21:20,320 --> 00:21:22,800
It's one of the most persistent themes
in the Bible.
304
00:21:23,280 --> 00:21:24,884
So...
305
00:21:25,960 --> 00:21:29,646
...is it possible for me
to know a woman...
306
00:21:29,800 --> 00:21:32,929
...in the Biblical sense, so to speak?
307
00:21:34,400 --> 00:21:36,050
And...
308
00:21:37,440 --> 00:21:39,442
And do I want to find out?
309
00:21:42,000 --> 00:21:43,570
You want my opinion?
310
00:21:43,720 --> 00:21:45,290
Please.
311
00:21:57,320 --> 00:22:01,848
In my heart, I feel like he'll give you
a free pass on this one.
312
00:22:06,160 --> 00:22:07,844
Go for it.
Huh?
313
00:22:08,000 --> 00:22:09,161
Go for it.
314
00:22:09,320 --> 00:22:11,129
Really?
Yes.
315
00:22:11,280 --> 00:22:13,647
If you feel up to it. Do you feel up to it?
316
00:22:14,000 --> 00:22:15,968
To tell you the truth...
317
00:22:16,560 --> 00:22:17,800
...I'm scared.
318
00:22:17,960 --> 00:22:19,246
Well, then, we should pray.
319
00:22:27,640 --> 00:22:29,608
Sweet Jesus...
320
00:22:30,200 --> 00:22:33,010
...Mark and I sit at your feet...
321
00:22:33,720 --> 00:22:36,451
...and pray that you bless
this little journey.
322
00:22:36,600 --> 00:22:40,207
This one small step for a man.
323
00:22:41,120 --> 00:22:43,361
I really feel proud of myself.
324
00:22:44,040 --> 00:22:47,931
Imposing on someone I hardly know
to fornicate in their home.
325
00:22:48,080 --> 00:22:49,206
Get over it.
326
00:22:49,360 --> 00:22:51,488
It's perfectly normal.
327
00:22:53,880 --> 00:22:56,360
Ta-da!
Wow.
328
00:22:58,200 --> 00:23:01,204
There are all sorts of useful things
in that drawer over there...
329
00:23:01,400 --> 00:23:03,129
...if you guys feel like exploring.
330
00:23:03,280 --> 00:23:06,011
Oh, that's okay.
I'll bring my own sheets and towels.
331
00:23:06,200 --> 00:23:08,168
No, everything will be provided.
332
00:23:08,360 --> 00:23:11,728
I'm really honored that you asked me.
It'll be great karma for the house.
333
00:23:11,880 --> 00:23:14,406
Great karma for the house?
334
00:23:14,720 --> 00:23:16,768
My God, the pressure already.
335
00:23:16,920 --> 00:23:19,127
I can't stand it.
336
00:23:26,920 --> 00:23:28,206
Hey. It's Tony.
337
00:23:28,360 --> 00:23:29,964
Hi. This is Laura White.
338
00:23:30,120 --> 00:23:31,929
Is Cheryl in, please?
339
00:23:32,080 --> 00:23:33,969
- Cheryl.
- What is it?
340
00:23:34,120 --> 00:23:35,531
Phone.
341
00:23:35,720 --> 00:23:37,324
She's coming.
342
00:23:44,880 --> 00:23:47,247
I'm not your girlfriend.
When someone calls...
343
00:23:47,440 --> 00:23:50,523
...particularly someone you don't know,
you can use the word "Mom."
344
00:23:50,680 --> 00:23:53,286
Hello. This is Cheryl.
Hi. It's Laura.
345
00:23:53,440 --> 00:23:55,647
Haven't heard from you for a while.
How are you?
346
00:23:55,800 --> 00:23:58,406
Pretty well.
Look, I called to ask how you would feel...
347
00:23:58,560 --> 00:24:01,882
...about working
with a severely disabled client.
348
00:24:02,080 --> 00:24:03,127
I'm f...
349
00:24:03,280 --> 00:24:05,282
Can you hold on one second?
350
00:24:05,440 --> 00:24:06,601
Hey...
351
00:24:06,760 --> 00:24:08,489
...get a glass.
352
00:24:14,720 --> 00:24:16,882
Hello. Mark O'Brien's phone.
353
00:24:17,880 --> 00:24:21,646
Hi, this is Cheryl Cohen Greene.
May I speak to Mark?
354
00:24:28,120 --> 00:24:31,806
Uh, uh... Yeah, could you hold a second?
355
00:24:31,960 --> 00:24:33,962
What? What am I doing here?
Yes or no?
356
00:24:34,160 --> 00:24:36,731
Come on, make up your mind.
357
00:24:39,000 --> 00:24:40,604
Okay.
358
00:24:42,120 --> 00:24:43,565
Yeah. Go ahead.
359
00:24:45,160 --> 00:24:46,650
Hello. This is Mark.
360
00:24:46,800 --> 00:24:48,325
Hi, Mark. This is Cheryl.
361
00:24:48,480 --> 00:24:53,247
Laura called to introduce you. I understand
you'd like to meet. Is that right?
362
00:24:53,840 --> 00:24:55,080
Uh...
363
00:24:56,000 --> 00:24:57,331
Yes.
364
00:24:57,480 --> 00:25:00,848
I could see you on the thirteenth at 11:00.
365
00:25:01,000 --> 00:25:02,650
Would that be any good for you?
366
00:25:02,800 --> 00:25:04,564
Oh. Uh...
367
00:25:07,160 --> 00:25:09,686
Yes, I think that would be fine for me.
368
00:25:09,840 --> 00:25:11,205
Where are you from?
369
00:25:11,400 --> 00:25:13,323
Boston. You?
370
00:25:13,480 --> 00:25:16,324
Salem. Small world.
Oh.
371
00:25:17,600 --> 00:25:20,490
We'll talk for a while to begin with,
and when you're ready...
372
00:25:20,640 --> 00:25:23,371
...we'll start doing
some body-awareness exercises.
373
00:25:26,760 --> 00:25:29,161
Holy Mother of God.
374
00:25:31,360 --> 00:25:35,126
What are body-awareness exercises?
375
00:25:49,120 --> 00:25:51,043
Which one?
Doesn't matter.
376
00:25:52,400 --> 00:25:55,165
Will you stop acting
like you're going to your own execution?
377
00:25:55,360 --> 00:25:56,725
I'm not acting.
378
00:26:02,160 --> 00:26:04,640
Okay, the purple one.
379
00:26:05,480 --> 00:26:07,801
Just try and think about
something else.
380
00:26:08,000 --> 00:26:09,729
Baseball, for example.
381
00:26:09,920 --> 00:26:13,561
That's what they usually tell boys to do.
Baseball.
382
00:26:13,720 --> 00:26:16,121
You mean like
hope I make it to second base?
383
00:26:16,280 --> 00:26:17,884
That's helpful.
384
00:26:18,040 --> 00:26:22,250
Okay. All right. Be like that.
Uh...
385
00:26:27,480 --> 00:26:29,687
Maybe she forgot.
386
00:26:29,840 --> 00:26:31,808
Yeah, she forgot
or she got the date wrong.
387
00:26:31,960 --> 00:26:33,928
We should... We should just forget it.
388
00:26:34,080 --> 00:26:35,969
Let's go back. Come on.
389
00:26:36,120 --> 00:26:37,451
She has not forgotten. See?
390
00:26:38,760 --> 00:26:39,761
- Hi.
- Hi.
391
00:26:39,920 --> 00:26:41,285
Come on in.
All right.
392
00:26:41,440 --> 00:26:42,601
Hi.
Hi.
393
00:26:46,840 --> 00:26:48,365
Thank you.
394
00:26:58,800 --> 00:27:00,290
Okay. I'm going.
395
00:27:00,440 --> 00:27:03,364
I'll be back around 1,
but if you guys are finished early...
396
00:27:03,520 --> 00:27:05,488
...you can just let yourselves out.
Okay.
397
00:27:05,680 --> 00:27:08,047
Have fun.
Thanks. Bye.
398
00:27:08,800 --> 00:27:10,643
Bye.
399
00:27:16,320 --> 00:27:17,481
What time is it?
400
00:27:19,800 --> 00:27:22,644
Twelve after 11.
I think there's a strong possibility...
401
00:27:22,800 --> 00:27:25,371
...she's had second thoughts.
Mark.
402
00:27:25,520 --> 00:27:30,128
If she does arrive, she'd be perfectly
within her rights to turn around and run.
403
00:27:30,600 --> 00:27:32,011
She won't.
404
00:28:04,400 --> 00:28:06,323
- Hi. I'm Cheryl.
- Hi.
405
00:28:06,480 --> 00:28:08,482
Sorry I'm late.
Oh, no, no, not a problem.
406
00:28:08,640 --> 00:28:11,086
Come on in.
I'm Vera, one of Mark's helpers.
407
00:28:11,240 --> 00:28:12,526
Nice to meet you.
408
00:28:12,680 --> 00:28:14,682
Nice to meet you, too. Just...
409
00:28:22,000 --> 00:28:23,729
Hi, Mark O'Brien.
410
00:28:25,080 --> 00:28:27,128
Hi, Cheryl Cohen Greene.
411
00:28:27,280 --> 00:28:29,044
I'll be back in, say,
two hours?
412
00:28:29,200 --> 00:28:31,726
Yes. Perfect.
Okay.
413
00:28:37,080 --> 00:28:39,651
So...
Your money's on the desk over there.
414
00:28:42,480 --> 00:28:45,723
Yes, it is. Thank you.
415
00:28:45,880 --> 00:28:48,326
That was the wrong way to start off.
416
00:28:48,480 --> 00:28:50,562
It really was. Shall we start again?
417
00:28:50,720 --> 00:28:52,484
Please. You start.
418
00:28:53,480 --> 00:28:55,642
Although the aim is for us to have sex...
419
00:28:55,800 --> 00:28:58,531
...I'm not a prostitute.
You don't have to pay me up front.
420
00:28:58,680 --> 00:29:01,490
I have nothing against prostitutes,
but there's a difference.
421
00:29:01,640 --> 00:29:04,246
We can talk about that later.
I'm sorry.
422
00:29:04,760 --> 00:29:08,401
The other thing is, there's a limit
to the number of sessions we can have.
423
00:29:08,600 --> 00:29:10,921
Did Laura mention that
when you saw her?
424
00:29:11,080 --> 00:29:13,686
I'm sorry. I don't remember.
425
00:29:13,840 --> 00:29:17,526
The limit is six, but that gives us
plenty of opportunity to explore.
426
00:29:17,680 --> 00:29:18,920
Six.
427
00:29:19,080 --> 00:29:21,731
So I understand
you're able to have an erection.
428
00:29:22,280 --> 00:29:24,089
Yes, but not by choice.
429
00:29:24,280 --> 00:29:28,604
Do you know how many men there are who
would give anything for a natural erection?
430
00:29:28,760 --> 00:29:32,446
Is this your place?
No, it's a friend's.
431
00:29:32,600 --> 00:29:35,729
The only bedroom furniture
I have at my place is an iron lung.
432
00:29:36,560 --> 00:29:41,407
I've been wondering maybe
about possibly buying a futon...
433
00:29:41,560 --> 00:29:44,928
...you know, in case the need arose.
It might be worth thinking about.
434
00:29:45,080 --> 00:29:46,809
I've got the space, I think.
435
00:29:46,960 --> 00:29:49,770
It can be expensive, though, a nice...
436
00:29:49,920 --> 00:29:52,651
Futon, I mean. How much do you think
a good one would cost?
437
00:29:52,800 --> 00:29:55,280
Because I never...
Mark, take a deep breath.
438
00:29:56,000 --> 00:29:57,490
Yeah.
439
00:29:59,280 --> 00:30:00,645
And let go.
440
00:30:03,160 --> 00:30:07,404
Do I seem anxious?
You do a little.
441
00:30:07,560 --> 00:30:09,881
So Laura tells me you're a poet.
442
00:30:10,040 --> 00:30:11,963
What's it like to be a poet?
443
00:30:12,840 --> 00:30:17,129
It's a way of living inside your own head,
which is where I spend most of my time.
444
00:30:17,640 --> 00:30:19,563
But not today.
445
00:30:19,720 --> 00:30:22,166
Nice shirt, by the way.
446
00:30:22,320 --> 00:30:23,526
Thank you.
447
00:30:23,680 --> 00:30:26,490
So I'm gonna ask you
some basic questions, okay?
448
00:30:26,640 --> 00:30:29,803
Sure. Explain to me, so
that I really understand...
449
00:30:29,960 --> 00:30:32,406
...exactly what the iron lung is for.
450
00:30:32,600 --> 00:30:34,329
It keeps me breathing.
451
00:30:34,520 --> 00:30:37,763
I can spend a few hours outside of it
with my portable respirator...
452
00:30:37,920 --> 00:30:40,491
...depending on how I feel...
453
00:30:40,640 --> 00:30:43,246
...but I work and sleep in the iron lung.
454
00:30:44,880 --> 00:30:46,644
And how do you feel right now?
455
00:30:46,800 --> 00:30:48,211
Out of my league.
456
00:30:49,640 --> 00:30:53,201
I meant your breathing.
Oh, fine.
457
00:30:53,360 --> 00:30:55,966
In fact, better than usual.
That's great.
458
00:30:56,160 --> 00:30:57,366
Shall we get undressed?
459
00:30:59,920 --> 00:31:01,046
Sure.
460
00:31:08,040 --> 00:31:10,168
So it's good for me...
Be careful.
461
00:31:11,000 --> 00:31:12,570
Did that hurt?
462
00:31:12,760 --> 00:31:14,125
Not yet.
463
00:31:18,320 --> 00:31:20,891
Do you have any areas
of unusual sensitivity?
464
00:31:21,040 --> 00:31:23,566
Any parts of your body
you don't want me to touch?
465
00:31:23,720 --> 00:31:26,405
I have normal sensitivity all over.
466
00:31:26,560 --> 00:31:31,805
I'm not paralyzed exactly.
It's just my muscles don't work too good.
467
00:31:31,960 --> 00:31:34,884
But you could touch me anywhere.
468
00:31:35,320 --> 00:31:36,890
That's great.
469
00:31:39,200 --> 00:31:40,247
Ow! Ow!
470
00:31:40,400 --> 00:31:43,563
Stop! It hurts! It hurts! Holy Mother of God.
What...? What's wrong?
471
00:31:43,720 --> 00:31:45,927
Ahh! My fingers are caught.
It's okay. It's okay.
472
00:31:46,080 --> 00:31:49,766
I've got it. I've got you. Don't worry.
Be careful, please.
473
00:31:52,600 --> 00:31:57,083
Mark, I'm gonna be really careful
with you.
474
00:31:57,240 --> 00:32:00,164
I don't want to hurt you or injure you
in any way.
475
00:32:01,760 --> 00:32:05,287
And it's really not sexy when
you yell at me. Okay?
476
00:32:07,240 --> 00:32:08,890
I won't yell at you any more.
477
00:32:09,040 --> 00:32:12,010
But you'll tell me, calmly...
478
00:32:12,200 --> 00:32:14,248
...the minute something starts to hurt.
479
00:32:14,880 --> 00:32:16,291
Yes.
480
00:32:16,440 --> 00:32:18,124
Okay.
481
00:32:19,400 --> 00:32:20,925
Here we go.
482
00:32:22,760 --> 00:32:24,444
Piece of cake. Heh.
483
00:32:37,080 --> 00:32:39,924
Nice shirt.
You already said that.
484
00:32:41,280 --> 00:32:42,566
Did I?
485
00:32:57,320 --> 00:32:58,651
Okay.
486
00:32:59,840 --> 00:33:03,401
I'm gonna slide these down.
Be careful with my feet, okay? My feet.
487
00:33:03,560 --> 00:33:05,210
Be careful.
Hold your breath.
488
00:33:05,360 --> 00:33:06,771
Okay. Whoa. There you go.
489
00:33:06,960 --> 00:33:08,325
Careful. Not so fast.
490
00:33:33,520 --> 00:33:35,204
You ready?
491
00:33:35,640 --> 00:33:36,926
Whoa.
492
00:33:37,600 --> 00:33:40,001
I'm gonna take that as a yes.
493
00:33:41,600 --> 00:33:44,683
So the difference between me
and a prostitute...
494
00:33:44,840 --> 00:33:47,047
...is a prostitute
wants your return business.
495
00:33:47,200 --> 00:33:48,326
I don't.
496
00:33:48,480 --> 00:33:51,211
I'm here to help you
learn about your sexual feelings...
497
00:33:51,360 --> 00:33:53,522
...so you can share them
with a future partner.
498
00:33:54,480 --> 00:34:00,328
Mark, I want you to tell me how it feels each
time I touch a different part of your body.
499
00:34:00,480 --> 00:34:03,370
Okay?
You know, whenever I'm naked...
500
00:34:04,160 --> 00:34:06,925
...everyone else in the room
is always dressed.
501
00:34:07,080 --> 00:34:10,163
Now that I'm in bed with
another naked person, it's very confusing.
502
00:34:10,760 --> 00:34:12,125
Why is it confusing?
503
00:34:12,320 --> 00:34:15,802
I'd always expected that God
or my parents would intervene...
504
00:34:15,960 --> 00:34:19,681
...to keep this moment from ever happening.
Not this time.
505
00:34:21,000 --> 00:34:23,321
So if something feels good,
you tell me.
506
00:34:23,480 --> 00:34:26,563
If something is ticklish or bothers you,
I want you to let me know.
507
00:34:26,720 --> 00:34:29,929
I don't want you to tolerate anything.
Okay.
508
00:34:30,080 --> 00:34:32,686
I'm gonna start with the top
of your head.
509
00:34:38,880 --> 00:34:41,770
You have soft hair.
510
00:34:42,600 --> 00:34:44,762
It's really nice to touch.
511
00:34:44,920 --> 00:34:48,003
Does it feel good?
It does.
512
00:34:59,960 --> 00:35:01,530
That feels weird.
513
00:35:02,200 --> 00:35:03,611
Weird good or weird bad?
514
00:35:04,120 --> 00:35:05,690
Just weird.
515
00:35:12,600 --> 00:35:14,250
That's good.
516
00:35:15,160 --> 00:35:18,243
Still good?
Everything good so far except the ear.
517
00:35:19,760 --> 00:35:21,967
Are these the body awareness
exercises?
518
00:35:22,120 --> 00:35:26,091
You're very clever to have worked that out.
People tell me I'm very perceptive.
519
00:35:27,840 --> 00:35:29,968
Mark, would you like to
see what I feel like?
520
00:35:32,600 --> 00:35:33,965
Sure.
521
00:35:59,560 --> 00:36:03,042
You touch one, you have to touch the other.
It's sort of a rule.
522
00:36:05,400 --> 00:36:08,165
That's a good rule.
Are you wearing cologne?
523
00:36:08,720 --> 00:36:10,245
Yes.
I like it.
524
00:36:10,400 --> 00:36:13,085
I don't usually like cologne,
but I like that.
525
00:36:15,160 --> 00:36:18,528
So, Mark, I'm gonna move my hand
along your body...
526
00:36:18,960 --> 00:36:22,567
...down to your penis, and
if you feel me... Ooh!
527
00:36:26,720 --> 00:36:29,041
Oh.
Nice job.
528
00:36:30,040 --> 00:36:32,646
I thought there would be more to it.
529
00:36:33,040 --> 00:36:35,247
Not that it was unpleasant.
530
00:36:35,400 --> 00:36:38,961
After all, I was in bed with a naked woman.
531
00:36:39,120 --> 00:36:43,011
She complimented me on my shirt,
my hair.
532
00:36:43,160 --> 00:36:45,367
She held my penis.
533
00:36:45,880 --> 00:36:49,487
I haven't even seen my penis
for over 30 years.
534
00:36:50,520 --> 00:36:52,568
Am I sharing too much, Father?
535
00:36:52,720 --> 00:36:55,121
No, no. I'm used to it.
536
00:37:05,080 --> 00:37:07,890
So next week.
537
00:37:08,040 --> 00:37:10,725
Friday the 20th, same time?
538
00:37:10,880 --> 00:37:12,325
That's good for me.
539
00:37:12,480 --> 00:37:14,687
Next time, we'll start to work
on intercourse.
540
00:37:17,240 --> 00:37:21,245
Were you afraid at the thought of seeing me?
Oh, God, I was terrified.
541
00:37:22,360 --> 00:37:25,887
You should be proud of yourself.
You did great. We've made real progress.
542
00:37:26,040 --> 00:37:28,930
Can I ask you something?
Sure. What would you like to ask?
543
00:37:29,080 --> 00:37:30,730
Anything, really.
544
00:37:30,880 --> 00:37:33,360
Just tell me something about yourself.
545
00:37:33,560 --> 00:37:36,086
Anything.
Okay.
546
00:37:36,320 --> 00:37:39,847
Um... I'm a very private person.
I have a private life.
547
00:37:40,000 --> 00:37:43,163
I need you to be aware of that.
But that's about it.
548
00:37:43,360 --> 00:37:44,521
This therapy's about you.
549
00:37:44,680 --> 00:37:47,286
Hello.
Welcome back.
550
00:37:48,320 --> 00:37:51,290
Perfect timing.
I hope you guys kept the noise down.
551
00:37:55,160 --> 00:37:56,525
See you then.
552
00:37:59,960 --> 00:38:02,440
What was it like?
How do you feel?
553
00:38:02,600 --> 00:38:05,763
Cleansed and victorious.
554
00:38:05,920 --> 00:38:08,400
Doesn't get any better than that.
555
00:38:08,560 --> 00:38:10,289
How about your first time?
556
00:38:10,440 --> 00:38:13,683
Oh, let me think.
What was it like?
557
00:38:13,840 --> 00:38:15,968
It wasn't all that pleasant.
Oh.
558
00:38:16,120 --> 00:38:18,282
I mean, it was consensual
and everything...
559
00:38:18,480 --> 00:38:21,768
...and I was in love with the guy,
but his dick seemed enormous to me.
560
00:38:21,920 --> 00:38:25,322
I didn't think it would fit.
It was scary.
561
00:38:25,480 --> 00:38:28,450
He was nice. I guess he couldn't help it.
562
00:38:28,600 --> 00:38:30,967
Was he Chinese?
Are you kidding me?
563
00:38:31,160 --> 00:38:34,130
I only dated white guys in high school.
Why is that?
564
00:38:34,280 --> 00:38:36,408
Stick it to my mom and dad,
I suppose.
565
00:38:36,560 --> 00:38:39,211
Are they happy now
you have a Chinese boyfriend?
566
00:38:39,360 --> 00:38:41,488
They're happy. I'm happy.
567
00:38:42,160 --> 00:38:43,571
What's his dick like?
568
00:38:44,400 --> 00:38:45,765
Perfect size.
569
00:38:46,640 --> 00:38:49,120
Why do you call it a
dick instead of a penis?
570
00:38:50,040 --> 00:38:51,087
Dick...
571
00:38:51,240 --> 00:38:53,811
Penis sounds like some vegetable
you don't want to eat.
572
00:38:53,960 --> 00:38:56,327
Heh, heh.
Dick sounds like what it is.
573
00:38:58,840 --> 00:39:00,683
The thing is...
574
00:39:01,480 --> 00:39:04,609
...it was all over so damn quickly.
575
00:39:05,840 --> 00:39:08,525
Yeah, tell me about it.
576
00:39:15,920 --> 00:39:17,365
First session.
577
00:39:17,520 --> 00:39:20,410
Mark O'Brien is the oldest
of four children...
578
00:39:20,560 --> 00:39:22,642
...and raised Catholic.
579
00:39:23,040 --> 00:39:25,042
He was extremely nervous.
580
00:39:25,200 --> 00:39:29,728
He yelled a lot when I took off his shirt,
but I think more out of fear than pain.
581
00:39:29,880 --> 00:39:34,363
He cannot masturbate, has had
only the occasional kissing experience.
582
00:39:34,520 --> 00:39:39,048
He's capable of achieving an erection easily,
but the unusual curvature of his body...
583
00:39:39,200 --> 00:39:42,329
...could be a serious
obstacle to intercourse.
584
00:40:17,720 --> 00:40:21,964
I just started working with this gentleman
who spends almost his entire life...
585
00:40:22,120 --> 00:40:25,442
...trapped in a big metal box.
586
00:40:28,080 --> 00:40:30,048
Did you hear what I said?
587
00:40:32,800 --> 00:40:35,770
Yes. Yes.
588
00:40:36,560 --> 00:40:40,281
And you are a saint.
589
00:40:59,360 --> 00:41:01,886
"Sometimes the head of the penis
may be too large...
590
00:41:02,040 --> 00:41:05,203
...to penetrate the vaginal opening
smoothly...
591
00:41:05,400 --> 00:41:08,961
...in which case the application
of lubricant is recommended...
592
00:41:09,120 --> 00:41:12,522
...to avoid possible..."
593
00:41:12,680 --> 00:41:14,808
Oh, my God.
594
00:41:18,240 --> 00:41:21,722
So, what's on the menu
for today?
595
00:41:21,880 --> 00:41:23,564
We're attempting intercourse.
596
00:41:23,720 --> 00:41:25,848
Heh. The big one.
597
00:41:26,040 --> 00:41:27,804
What do you think of it?
598
00:41:28,000 --> 00:41:29,764
Intercourse.
599
00:41:30,680 --> 00:41:33,331
Overrated but necessary.
600
00:41:33,480 --> 00:41:36,324
Plenty of other ways
of achieving the same result.
601
00:41:36,480 --> 00:41:40,007
Somehow you don't feel like you've done it
until you've gone all the way in.
602
00:41:48,000 --> 00:41:49,843
I want you to look at me this time.
603
00:41:52,040 --> 00:41:54,725
Come on, give it a try. Open your eyes.
604
00:42:00,200 --> 00:42:01,690
Do you like watching me undress?
605
00:42:02,720 --> 00:42:04,324
I do.
606
00:42:07,720 --> 00:42:09,882
So from now on...
607
00:42:10,040 --> 00:42:13,840
...you're gonna start to listen
to signals from your body.
608
00:42:14,000 --> 00:42:16,128
That way, you'll be able
to have some control...
609
00:42:16,280 --> 00:42:18,009
Oh, God! Oh, God.
610
00:42:18,720 --> 00:42:20,324
Damn.
611
00:42:21,920 --> 00:42:23,331
Shit.
612
00:42:24,360 --> 00:42:26,522
I did it again.
613
00:42:27,040 --> 00:42:29,407
This time, I ejaculated on her thigh.
614
00:42:32,200 --> 00:42:34,407
I felt cursed.
615
00:42:35,320 --> 00:42:38,005
That the whole enterprise was cursed.
616
00:42:38,200 --> 00:42:41,329
It seemed like a totally just punishment.
617
00:42:41,480 --> 00:42:45,280
God wasn't actually denying
my sexuality.
618
00:42:45,440 --> 00:42:47,841
He was just pointing out to me
how useless it was.
619
00:42:50,720 --> 00:42:55,408
It's amazing to me how often God
is brought into the sex act.
620
00:42:55,840 --> 00:42:57,649
I understand even among nonbelievers...
621
00:42:57,840 --> 00:43:02,243
...the most common expression
of sexual ecstasy is, "Oh, God." Heh.
622
00:43:05,080 --> 00:43:08,050
Okay, I don't want to hear
any more about God cursing you.
623
00:43:08,200 --> 00:43:12,046
I want the credit. It was
my overpowering beauty that did it.
624
00:43:12,200 --> 00:43:15,761
It took you by surprise.
Now, where were we?
625
00:43:16,560 --> 00:43:18,449
What do you mean, "Where were we?"
626
00:43:18,600 --> 00:43:20,807
I'm gonna touch you.
627
00:43:21,880 --> 00:43:24,724
I'm touching you.
Okay.
628
00:43:24,880 --> 00:43:28,043
And when we both feel you're aroused...
629
00:43:28,200 --> 00:43:31,409
...like now,
I'm gonna guide you inside me.
630
00:43:31,560 --> 00:43:33,085
Is there anything I need to do?
631
00:43:33,920 --> 00:43:35,445
Just close your eyes...
632
00:43:35,600 --> 00:43:39,764
...and feel your body.
That's all you need to do.
633
00:43:46,280 --> 00:43:49,523
It won't fit. It's not going to fit.
Mark, it will fit just fine.
634
00:43:49,680 --> 00:43:52,490
No, it's dangerous. It's too big.
It's not too big. Relax.
635
00:43:52,640 --> 00:43:56,486
No, it won't fit. It'll hurt. It's too risky.
Mark, Mark, stop.
636
00:43:56,640 --> 00:43:58,165
Stop.
637
00:43:58,360 --> 00:44:01,807
I promise you nothing bad
will happen.
638
00:44:03,080 --> 00:44:06,129
Let's try again
while you're still hard.
639
00:44:11,640 --> 00:44:14,484
Shit! Shit.
640
00:44:16,120 --> 00:44:18,202
Shit.
641
00:44:20,000 --> 00:44:21,843
I'm really sorry.
642
00:44:22,000 --> 00:44:23,684
Stop being sorry.
643
00:44:23,840 --> 00:44:27,208
And stop reading
those stupid sex manuals.
644
00:44:30,200 --> 00:44:33,329
There's still some time left.
We could talk.
645
00:44:33,840 --> 00:44:37,322
Or you could suck my nipples.
That went well.
646
00:44:38,080 --> 00:44:40,765
Or which would you like to do first?
647
00:44:41,760 --> 00:44:45,970
I believe the root of his anxiety
is his parents and his religion.
648
00:44:46,160 --> 00:44:48,766
He believes he doesn't deserve sex.
649
00:44:48,920 --> 00:44:52,527
He believes he's responsible for his
little sister's death at the age of 7...
650
00:44:52,680 --> 00:44:55,650
...because his mother
was too busy looking after him.
651
00:44:56,480 --> 00:44:59,529
We discussed his fantasies,
which were mostly masochistic.
652
00:44:59,680 --> 00:45:02,650
Again, the idea of being punished.
653
00:45:03,080 --> 00:45:08,610
He's never seen female genitalia before and
seems quite frightened at the thought of it.
654
00:45:09,480 --> 00:45:12,006
My worry now is
that it's never gonna happen.
655
00:45:12,800 --> 00:45:15,883
I'm never gonna have intercourse
with Cheryl or any other woman.
656
00:45:16,040 --> 00:45:19,522
Maybe intercourse
would prove I was an adult.
657
00:45:20,240 --> 00:45:22,846
Maybe I don't want to cross that line.
658
00:45:23,440 --> 00:45:27,764
Maybe this is a bad idea.
659
00:45:29,360 --> 00:45:31,044
Do you want to know what I think?
660
00:45:31,200 --> 00:45:33,089
Please.
661
00:45:33,480 --> 00:45:36,848
Forget the psychobabble.
I grew up on a farm.
662
00:45:37,040 --> 00:45:39,725
Even the animals need a couple of tries
to get it right.
663
00:45:40,560 --> 00:45:43,166
May I suggest
you try to enjoy it more?
664
00:45:43,920 --> 00:45:48,289
Don't worry about the technical stuff.
You're a poet.
665
00:45:48,440 --> 00:45:50,602
Be romantic.
666
00:45:57,160 --> 00:45:59,686
Uh... No.
667
00:46:02,000 --> 00:46:04,082
Uh... Maybe.
668
00:46:08,440 --> 00:46:09,885
Yes. Thanks.
669
00:46:10,040 --> 00:46:11,565
That's good.
670
00:46:11,720 --> 00:46:12,846
All right.
671
00:46:13,040 --> 00:46:14,644
Okay.
672
00:46:17,600 --> 00:46:18,761
You nervous?
673
00:46:18,960 --> 00:46:20,485
A little.
674
00:46:21,080 --> 00:46:24,448
Want a spritz?
Yes, of course I would.
675
00:46:32,200 --> 00:46:34,601
I have a good feeling about today.
676
00:46:34,760 --> 00:46:36,808
A very good feeling.
Good.
677
00:46:36,960 --> 00:46:39,281
I had a feeling
it was never going to happen...
678
00:46:39,480 --> 00:46:42,324
...but I think today's the day.
Can I make a suggestion?
679
00:46:42,480 --> 00:46:44,130
Please.
680
00:46:44,320 --> 00:46:46,527
Stop thinking about it.
681
00:46:48,360 --> 00:46:50,408
Couldn't have wished for nicer weather.
682
00:46:50,560 --> 00:46:53,131
You're not listening, are you?
Stop thinking about it.
683
00:46:53,280 --> 00:46:55,282
Beautiful weather.
684
00:47:10,360 --> 00:47:12,089
Oh, my God, Mark.
685
00:47:12,240 --> 00:47:13,890
I'm so sorry.
686
00:47:14,040 --> 00:47:15,530
I forgot.
687
00:47:19,520 --> 00:47:22,000
She was very apologetic.
688
00:47:22,200 --> 00:47:24,521
Look, it may not be exactly
what we had in mind...
689
00:47:24,680 --> 00:47:28,287
...but I noticed a couple of blocks
from here a pretty nice motel.
690
00:47:28,440 --> 00:47:30,681
Might be worth checking out.
691
00:47:31,200 --> 00:47:32,929
Why not?
692
00:47:46,880 --> 00:47:49,360
Do you have anything on the ground floor?
693
00:47:50,200 --> 00:47:52,248
I've got a single.
How much?
694
00:47:52,400 --> 00:47:53,526
Thirty-five plus tax.
695
00:47:55,600 --> 00:47:57,967
My boss is the gentleman
in the gurney.
696
00:47:58,120 --> 00:48:00,327
He's supposed to be having
a therapy session.
697
00:48:00,520 --> 00:48:03,046
The facility we normally use
had some scheduling mix-up.
698
00:48:03,200 --> 00:48:06,568
We just need the room for two hours.
Can you do 20 cash?
699
00:48:10,800 --> 00:48:13,246
- A soda machine around the corner.
- Thanks.
700
00:48:13,400 --> 00:48:17,371
- And an ice machine if you need it.
- I'm sure it'll come in handy.
701
00:48:17,520 --> 00:48:19,682
Thank you so much.
702
00:48:30,400 --> 00:48:32,448
Okay, that's it.
703
00:48:33,280 --> 00:48:36,727
I've got a book to read. I'll be hanging
around reception if you need me.
704
00:48:36,880 --> 00:48:38,484
Thanks.
705
00:48:46,240 --> 00:48:48,208
Very atmospheric.
706
00:48:48,960 --> 00:48:51,884
Some people find motels exciting.
707
00:48:52,040 --> 00:48:54,281
Do you think I could be
one of those people?
708
00:48:54,440 --> 00:48:56,249
Of course.
709
00:49:06,440 --> 00:49:09,808
Nice shirt.
As in racy and sophisticated?
710
00:49:09,960 --> 00:49:12,725
You took the words right out
of my mouth.
711
00:49:16,680 --> 00:49:18,603
What's wrong with your boss?
712
00:49:21,200 --> 00:49:23,931
Basically he can only move his head.
713
00:49:25,200 --> 00:49:28,647
So, what sort of therapy
are they doing?
714
00:49:30,360 --> 00:49:31,964
They're having sex.
715
00:49:37,000 --> 00:49:38,490
You're shitting me.
716
00:49:38,640 --> 00:49:41,041
Okay. I'm shitting you.
717
00:49:41,200 --> 00:49:42,804
Oh, no, come on,
tell me for real.
718
00:49:44,080 --> 00:49:45,570
What are they actually doing?
719
00:49:47,080 --> 00:49:50,289
Well, today,
after some appropriate foreplay...
720
00:49:50,440 --> 00:49:53,330
...they're gonna try to achieve
full penetration.
721
00:50:08,000 --> 00:50:09,525
Are you okay down there?
722
00:50:09,680 --> 00:50:11,842
I'm choking.
723
00:50:12,480 --> 00:50:15,086
Oh, my God.
The mouthpiece.
724
00:50:15,280 --> 00:50:17,203
The mouth...
725
00:50:17,360 --> 00:50:18,805
Thank you.
726
00:50:28,120 --> 00:50:31,203
Well, I guess that's off the menu
until further notice.
727
00:50:44,160 --> 00:50:46,970
Come on. Lighten up.
728
00:50:53,320 --> 00:50:56,164
Bonny girl, bonny girl
729
00:50:56,360 --> 00:51:00,251
Won't you be my bonny girl?
730
00:51:00,400 --> 00:51:05,327
My dad used to sing that
to my little sister Karen before she died.
731
00:51:07,160 --> 00:51:09,811
She was kind of a sad little girl.
It didn't do much good.
732
00:51:11,240 --> 00:51:14,244
I'm really sorry
that the last time I saw her...
733
00:51:14,400 --> 00:51:16,880
...I fought with her and made her cry.
734
00:51:20,960 --> 00:51:24,851
My parents could have left me
in a nursing home, you know.
735
00:51:26,080 --> 00:51:30,449
Then they found out that the average life
expectancy for polios...
736
00:51:31,000 --> 00:51:34,004
...in nursing homes was 18 months.
737
00:51:36,840 --> 00:51:38,763
They took me home.
738
00:51:40,560 --> 00:51:42,369
Gave me a life.
739
00:51:44,520 --> 00:51:46,568
Gave up theirs.
740
00:51:47,360 --> 00:51:48,441
Mark...
741
00:51:48,600 --> 00:51:51,604
...I'm just going to go to the bathroom
for a quick pee...
742
00:51:51,760 --> 00:51:55,651
...and when I come back,
we're going to achieve full penetration.
743
00:51:55,840 --> 00:51:58,571
But before I go,
I want you to close your eyes.
744
00:51:58,760 --> 00:52:00,603
Is this a game?
It's not a game.
745
00:52:00,800 --> 00:52:03,326
Just do as I say. Close your eyes.
746
00:52:10,800 --> 00:52:13,451
Picture yourself as a 6-year-old boy
at the beach.
747
00:52:15,640 --> 00:52:17,324
Can you do that?
748
00:52:19,360 --> 00:52:20,771
Yes.
749
00:52:20,920 --> 00:52:22,729
Very easily.
750
00:52:22,880 --> 00:52:25,451
Describe some of your feelings.
751
00:52:25,960 --> 00:52:28,201
I feel exhilarated.
752
00:52:30,280 --> 00:52:32,965
Running along the Atlantic Ocean.
753
00:52:33,360 --> 00:52:35,647
I feel the wind.
754
00:52:36,320 --> 00:52:39,403
Wet sand between my toes.
755
00:52:39,560 --> 00:52:41,767
Do you really feel like him?
756
00:52:41,920 --> 00:52:44,161
Yes, I really feel like him.
757
00:52:44,320 --> 00:52:46,482
And can you really picture him?
758
00:52:47,320 --> 00:52:49,846
I don't understand.
I said I could feel like him.
759
00:52:50,000 --> 00:52:52,890
Of course I can picture him.
From the outside.
760
00:52:53,040 --> 00:52:54,451
I mean, as an adult.
761
00:52:55,320 --> 00:52:57,527
As you are now.
762
00:52:57,680 --> 00:53:00,763
Looking at him, with his...
763
00:53:01,240 --> 00:53:02,844
...crew cut and his little face.
764
00:53:12,120 --> 00:53:13,565
Yes.
765
00:53:14,400 --> 00:53:16,641
And are you mad at him?
766
00:53:17,640 --> 00:53:22,043
Do you blame him for getting polio?
767
00:53:25,120 --> 00:53:27,282
Was it his fault?
768
00:53:57,000 --> 00:54:00,846
She either forgot to close the bathroom
door or didn't bother to close it.
769
00:54:02,080 --> 00:54:05,323
I found the sound of her peeing
incredibly erotic.
770
00:54:06,000 --> 00:54:10,244
And the sound of her tearing off
toilet paper incredibly intimate.
771
00:54:11,080 --> 00:54:14,323
By the time she came back,
I had a terrific boner.
772
00:54:22,600 --> 00:54:24,090
Go on.
773
00:54:24,600 --> 00:54:27,922
I'm gonna rub the tip of your penis
around my vulva.
774
00:54:28,080 --> 00:54:31,766
And when it's ready,
I'll guide you in.
775
00:54:31,920 --> 00:54:36,448
Breathe slowly
and think of something delicious.
776
00:55:14,160 --> 00:55:16,322
They've been a long time.
777
00:55:17,400 --> 00:55:18,765
Uh-huh.
778
00:55:22,640 --> 00:55:25,007
You got a boyfriend?
Yes.
779
00:55:28,760 --> 00:55:30,364
I grew up in Salem.
780
00:55:30,520 --> 00:55:32,727
Raised Catholic, like you...
781
00:55:32,880 --> 00:55:36,930
...but the Church did not appreciate
my attitude toward sex.
782
00:55:37,080 --> 00:55:40,846
You had an attitude toward sex?
I did. I liked it.
783
00:55:41,000 --> 00:55:43,844
They think they threw me out,
but I threw them out.
784
00:55:44,000 --> 00:55:46,367
So, for years,
I didn't believe in anything...
785
00:55:46,520 --> 00:55:48,966
...and now I'm converting
to Judaism.
786
00:55:49,120 --> 00:55:51,646
Well, it's good to have
some kind of insurance.
787
00:55:51,800 --> 00:55:54,724
Oh, I didn't think of that.
Then why are you doing it?
788
00:55:54,880 --> 00:55:59,204
My husband asked me to do it
before his grandmother dies.
789
00:55:59,360 --> 00:56:02,204
The idea is, if it makes her
happy and him happy...
790
00:56:02,360 --> 00:56:03,771
...it'll do the same for me.
791
00:56:04,560 --> 00:56:07,609
The fact that I'm already happy
does not seem to be relevant.
792
00:56:08,200 --> 00:56:11,204
What does your husband do?
He's a philosopher.
793
00:56:11,360 --> 00:56:15,081
Wow. At a university?
No. In his own mind.
794
00:56:15,240 --> 00:56:19,211
He runs the house and plays guitar.
795
00:56:19,360 --> 00:56:20,850
He thinks a lot.
796
00:56:28,400 --> 00:56:29,970
It's getting late.
797
00:56:38,880 --> 00:56:40,723
Hey, we did great today.
798
00:56:40,880 --> 00:56:42,564
You were fantastic.
799
00:56:43,040 --> 00:56:46,283
You're a fully-fledged
male Homo sapien...
800
00:56:46,440 --> 00:56:49,125
...endowed with a handsome
and substantial penis...
801
00:56:49,280 --> 00:56:51,362
...which now has a proven track record.
802
00:56:51,960 --> 00:56:53,769
You should be thrilled.
803
00:56:53,920 --> 00:56:55,251
Was I really inside you?
804
00:56:55,400 --> 00:56:58,927
You were really and truly inside me.
805
00:56:59,080 --> 00:57:01,686
For how long?
At least five or six seconds.
806
00:57:01,840 --> 00:57:03,330
Is that all?
807
00:57:03,520 --> 00:57:05,966
That's a long time for some people.
808
00:57:06,120 --> 00:57:09,203
You were pretty excited.
I don't know what you were thinking about.
809
00:57:09,400 --> 00:57:11,846
Yeah, I, whew, heh...
810
00:57:12,480 --> 00:57:14,289
I don't, either. Heh.
811
00:57:14,440 --> 00:57:15,601
It was...
812
00:57:15,760 --> 00:57:18,604
It was all a jumble of sensations.
813
00:57:18,760 --> 00:57:22,810
Well, you definitely
achieved penetration.
814
00:57:23,000 --> 00:57:25,241
It was penis-vagina all the way...
815
00:57:25,400 --> 00:57:27,971
...and you definitely
get an "A" for orgasm.
816
00:57:31,880 --> 00:57:33,370
Cheryl.
817
00:57:36,440 --> 00:57:37,965
Did you come?
818
00:57:39,480 --> 00:57:41,130
No, Mark, I didn't.
819
00:57:41,280 --> 00:57:43,487
Can we try for that next time?
820
00:57:46,040 --> 00:57:47,280
Is that what you want?
821
00:57:48,640 --> 00:57:50,165
Yes.
822
00:57:50,960 --> 00:57:52,769
That's what I want.
823
00:57:54,640 --> 00:57:56,324
Okay, then.
824
00:58:11,560 --> 00:58:14,131
Hi. How you doing?
Good. Good. Come on in.
825
00:58:14,280 --> 00:58:16,487
How are you?
Still exhausted.
826
00:58:16,680 --> 00:58:18,444
Beer?
No, I'm okay.
827
00:58:18,640 --> 00:58:21,689
Oh, you need a glass?
That'd be great.
828
00:58:21,840 --> 00:58:23,763
So...
829
00:58:23,920 --> 00:58:26,321
...on reflection, how do you feel?
830
00:58:26,520 --> 00:58:27,681
It was okay.
831
00:58:28,280 --> 00:58:32,604
I liked some of the other stuff just as much
or better, but I'm glad it's behind me.
832
00:58:32,760 --> 00:58:34,683
So am I. Congratulations.
833
00:58:34,880 --> 00:58:37,690
Thanks.
Thanks, Rod.
834
00:58:38,240 --> 00:58:40,925
When this is all over,
I'm gonna write an article about it.
835
00:58:41,120 --> 00:58:43,441
After all, sex sells.
836
00:58:43,600 --> 00:58:44,761
Seriously.
837
00:58:45,440 --> 00:58:48,683
So you're only doing this for the money?
Oh, absolutely.
838
00:58:48,840 --> 00:58:51,764
That makes me feel so much better
about everything.
839
00:58:52,880 --> 00:58:56,362
What is she like? Cheryl.
You've never said anything about her.
840
00:58:57,640 --> 00:58:59,961
She's the most wonderful person
on the planet.
841
00:59:01,600 --> 00:59:04,206
- How's it going?
- He reads too many books.
842
00:59:04,360 --> 00:59:06,931
He has it in his head
that after meeting three times...
843
00:59:07,080 --> 00:59:11,369
...we should be able to have penetrative
sex which results in simultaneous orgasm.
844
00:59:11,520 --> 00:59:14,410
Boom, just like that.
That's very funny.
845
00:59:14,560 --> 00:59:16,369
Yeah, I guess it is.
846
00:59:16,520 --> 00:59:18,329
What do you think of him?
847
00:59:20,280 --> 00:59:21,770
Cheryl?
848
00:59:22,600 --> 00:59:24,170
I like him.
849
00:59:42,880 --> 00:59:45,042
What are you thinking about?
850
00:59:46,200 --> 00:59:47,690
Nothing.
851
00:59:50,800 --> 00:59:52,962
I don't believe you.
852
00:59:54,440 --> 00:59:58,161
Okay, I was just thinking
about the whole conversion thing.
853
01:00:00,280 --> 01:00:02,567
I still don't believe you.
854
01:00:11,600 --> 01:00:13,762
Then whatever it is...
855
01:00:13,960 --> 01:00:17,043
...I guess I'm not in the mood
for talking about it.
856
01:00:21,040 --> 01:00:23,088
So?
857
01:00:24,760 --> 01:00:26,364
What do you think?
858
01:00:37,160 --> 01:00:38,810
Hello. This is Cheryl.
859
01:00:38,960 --> 01:00:40,610
Hey.
860
01:00:41,800 --> 01:00:43,006
Mark?
Hey.
861
01:00:43,200 --> 01:00:45,931
Could we meet somewhere for coffee?
862
01:00:46,800 --> 01:00:48,962
Somewhere nice? My treat.
863
01:00:50,520 --> 01:00:53,444
I don't usually meet with clients
outside of working hours.
864
01:00:53,600 --> 01:00:54,761
You know that.
865
01:00:54,960 --> 01:00:58,169
We don't have to talk business.
866
01:01:01,640 --> 01:01:06,168
Mark appears to be indulging
in typical transference behavior.
867
01:01:06,320 --> 01:01:09,608
We know this is not unusual
after first successful intercourse...
868
01:01:09,760 --> 01:01:13,082
...but I think he's
particularly susceptible.
869
01:01:24,360 --> 01:01:29,526
He cannot help but seeing me
as the multifunctional, all-purpose woman.
870
01:01:29,680 --> 01:01:34,163
Mother, sister, teacher,
lover, best friend.
871
01:01:34,320 --> 01:01:39,531
At the same time, his anxiety
about sexual performance has diminished.
872
01:01:54,880 --> 01:01:56,848
You look stunning.
873
01:01:57,000 --> 01:01:58,650
Look at this.
874
01:02:01,480 --> 01:02:03,562
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.
875
01:02:03,720 --> 01:02:05,768
Could you put my cup
right on the edge here?
876
01:02:05,920 --> 01:02:09,208
Sure.
Right on the edge.
877
01:02:09,520 --> 01:02:12,524
And stick the straw in my mouth,
please.
878
01:02:13,040 --> 01:02:14,883
Is that okay?
Perfect.
879
01:02:15,080 --> 01:02:18,084
Oh, sir, I'd wait a couple minutes.
That coffee's kind of hot.
880
01:02:18,240 --> 01:02:20,641
Oh, thanks.
You're welcome.
881
01:02:22,480 --> 01:02:26,087
So, what should we talk about?
You know, we don't have to do much talking.
882
01:02:26,760 --> 01:02:29,206
I just wanted to be seen
with you in public.
883
01:02:30,440 --> 01:02:33,364
And I want people to say, "Hey, who's
that gimp with that beautiful blond?
884
01:02:33,560 --> 01:02:37,167
Ha, ha, ha.
How did he get so lucky?"
885
01:02:41,840 --> 01:02:44,650
If an old girlfriend from school
you hadn't seen for years...
886
01:02:44,800 --> 01:02:46,928
...showed up here suddenly,
like, right now...
887
01:02:47,600 --> 01:02:49,762
...how would you introduce me?
888
01:02:50,760 --> 01:02:52,683
As your boyfriend?
889
01:02:52,840 --> 01:02:54,888
As my husband.
890
01:02:55,080 --> 01:02:57,128
I mean, why not go all the way?
891
01:02:59,120 --> 01:03:00,246
Really?
892
01:03:00,400 --> 01:03:02,846
We're pretending, right?
893
01:03:03,800 --> 01:03:05,370
So...
894
01:03:06,840 --> 01:03:08,444
...sure.
895
01:03:13,280 --> 01:03:15,760
"Love Poem for...
896
01:03:16,280 --> 01:03:21,286
For No One in Particular."
897
01:03:22,560 --> 01:03:24,164
Tell me...
898
01:03:24,960 --> 01:03:26,883
Tell me...
899
01:03:27,800 --> 01:03:28,801
Tell...
900
01:03:28,960 --> 01:03:30,769
Let me.
901
01:03:31,160 --> 01:03:33,003
Let me...
902
01:03:33,320 --> 01:03:35,322
Let me...
903
01:03:36,600 --> 01:03:38,409
Let me what?
904
01:04:05,160 --> 01:04:06,924
Really? Really, aren't you the one...
905
01:04:07,080 --> 01:04:09,162
...that's always said
it can't get personal?
906
01:04:09,360 --> 01:04:12,807
That's a whole other thing.
What are you doing opening my mail?
907
01:04:12,960 --> 01:04:15,008
It was scented.
I assumed it was junk mail.
908
01:04:15,200 --> 01:04:18,170
Even less reason to open it.
Where is it? Give it to me.
909
01:04:18,320 --> 01:04:21,051
You're not getting it.
This is none of your business.
910
01:04:21,200 --> 01:04:23,441
You're still not getting it.
I threw it out.
911
01:04:24,640 --> 01:04:26,529
You didn't.
I fucking did!
912
01:04:28,400 --> 01:04:29,970
What's up?
913
01:04:44,760 --> 01:04:46,444
Would you ask your mother...
914
01:04:46,600 --> 01:04:49,001
...to pass the salt, please?
915
01:04:49,440 --> 01:04:53,729
Ahem. Cheryl, would you
please pass the salt?
916
01:05:04,920 --> 01:05:08,083
Listen, I'm... I'm sorry.
917
01:05:08,240 --> 01:05:12,086
I know I really upset you before.
No, no, no. You didn't.
918
01:05:12,240 --> 01:05:14,561
I'm fine.
You sure?
919
01:05:14,760 --> 01:05:16,250
Yes.
920
01:05:19,720 --> 01:05:21,165
I promise.
Really?
921
01:05:21,320 --> 01:05:24,130
Yes. In fact, I've come around
to your point of view.
922
01:05:24,280 --> 01:05:25,645
You were right.
923
01:05:25,800 --> 01:05:28,770
You're usually right about these things.
924
01:05:39,280 --> 01:05:42,602
It was quite a lovely poem, really.
925
01:05:43,400 --> 01:05:45,721
Nothing astounding...
926
01:05:45,920 --> 01:05:49,527
...but it was heartfelt, and then...
Babe.
927
01:05:50,400 --> 01:05:52,289
Everything's great.
928
01:05:52,440 --> 01:05:55,728
I just need to get to sleep.
929
01:05:58,200 --> 01:05:59,690
Okay.
930
01:06:01,960 --> 01:06:03,564
Good night.
931
01:06:50,080 --> 01:06:53,129
Let me touch you with my words.
932
01:06:53,320 --> 01:06:56,324
For my hands lie limp as empty gloves.
933
01:07:16,640 --> 01:07:18,688
Amanda.
934
01:07:26,960 --> 01:07:28,849
I haven't seen you in a while.
935
01:07:29,000 --> 01:07:30,729
I know.
936
01:07:30,880 --> 01:07:32,564
I'm sorry.
937
01:07:34,240 --> 01:07:35,969
I'm, um...
938
01:07:36,120 --> 01:07:38,521
Well, I'm going to Germany...
939
01:07:38,680 --> 01:07:41,809
...so I wanted to say goodbye
to you before I left.
940
01:07:41,960 --> 01:07:43,644
Why are you going to Germany?
941
01:07:44,440 --> 01:07:45,885
To study German.
942
01:07:46,080 --> 01:07:48,048
For how long?
943
01:07:48,200 --> 01:07:52,285
One or two years, maybe.
944
01:07:53,080 --> 01:07:56,084
But, you know,
we should keep in touch.
945
01:07:56,240 --> 01:07:59,084
Yeah, but why go to Germany?
946
01:07:59,240 --> 01:08:01,925
It's the only place in the world
where humor is forbidden.
947
01:08:06,840 --> 01:08:08,604
What?
948
01:08:10,160 --> 01:08:12,686
You could always make me laugh.
949
01:08:18,000 --> 01:08:21,322
I love you, Mark.
950
01:08:25,120 --> 01:08:27,441
I really do.
Really?
951
01:08:27,600 --> 01:08:29,762
"Yes, I love you, but not in that way."
952
01:08:30,880 --> 01:08:33,360
"I love you, but I'm not in love with you."
953
01:08:33,520 --> 01:08:34,931
Blah, blah, blah.
954
01:08:35,400 --> 01:08:36,811
The same old story.
955
01:08:37,880 --> 01:08:39,405
I'm sorry.
956
01:08:58,240 --> 01:09:01,403
I think it's great what you're doing
with that surrogate lady.
957
01:09:01,560 --> 01:09:03,449
Well, it could have been you.
958
01:09:05,880 --> 01:09:08,087
Yeah, it could have been...
959
01:09:08,560 --> 01:09:10,164
...but it wasn't.
960
01:09:13,280 --> 01:09:15,009
I had this...
961
01:09:15,160 --> 01:09:19,722
...faint hope that she would show
the slightest bit of jealousy.
962
01:09:20,000 --> 01:09:22,571
Shows you how naive I am.
963
01:09:23,240 --> 01:09:25,641
The fact that I was no longer a virgin...
964
01:09:25,800 --> 01:09:28,770
...that I was a made man, so to speak...
965
01:09:28,920 --> 01:09:31,730
...it made no difference to her at all.
966
01:09:35,600 --> 01:09:37,602
Want to go out sometime?
967
01:09:39,240 --> 01:09:40,765
No. I don't think so.
968
01:09:40,920 --> 01:09:42,809
What? Your boyfriend?
969
01:09:42,960 --> 01:09:45,361
No. I'm busy. That's all.
970
01:09:47,840 --> 01:09:49,490
What's wrong with this anyway?
971
01:09:49,640 --> 01:09:51,642
We're having a nice time, aren't we?
972
01:09:52,640 --> 01:09:54,324
It's okay.
973
01:09:56,040 --> 01:09:58,611
Well, if you have stuff to do,
I can go take a walk...
974
01:09:58,760 --> 01:10:02,082
...if you're busy, and come back later.
No, no. Stay.
975
01:10:02,240 --> 01:10:03,730
Stay.
976
01:10:06,080 --> 01:10:08,048
So come on, tell me.
977
01:10:08,520 --> 01:10:10,682
What kind of therapist is she, really?
978
01:10:10,840 --> 01:10:13,844
I told you the first time.
She's a sex therapist.
979
01:10:16,200 --> 01:10:19,204
Today, they're working on
simultaneous orgasm.
980
01:10:22,400 --> 01:10:23,811
What's that?
981
01:10:29,040 --> 01:10:31,088
Boy, am I glad to see you.
982
01:10:31,240 --> 01:10:33,402
Don't you say that to all the girls?
983
01:10:33,560 --> 01:10:36,166
Yes, but I always mean it.
984
01:10:57,200 --> 01:10:59,726
Remember about your breathing?
985
01:11:01,720 --> 01:11:05,202
Concentrate on breathing out
rather than in.
986
01:11:06,760 --> 01:11:09,001
Mark was able to achieve an erection...
987
01:11:09,200 --> 01:11:11,931
...as soon as I put my mouth on him.
988
01:11:12,120 --> 01:11:14,566
He did the controlled breathing
as I suggested...
989
01:11:14,720 --> 01:11:19,282
...and I was able to get on top
and guide him in quite easily.
990
01:11:22,280 --> 01:11:23,964
Shit. Is it really in?
991
01:11:24,120 --> 01:11:26,088
It's really in.
992
01:11:27,960 --> 01:11:29,962
I couldn't believe it.
993
01:11:30,640 --> 01:11:32,768
I was finally there.
994
01:11:35,360 --> 01:11:37,806
Too soon, I came.
995
01:11:37,960 --> 01:11:40,770
But she kept holding me inside her.
996
01:11:43,400 --> 01:11:47,803
Then a look of pleasure
brushed lightly over her face...
997
01:11:48,280 --> 01:11:52,251
...as though an all-day itch
were finally being scratched.
998
01:11:58,800 --> 01:12:01,201
She put her hands down
on the bed by my shoulders...
999
01:12:01,360 --> 01:12:03,488
...and kissed my chest.
1000
01:12:08,200 --> 01:12:11,249
This act of affection moved me deeply.
1001
01:12:16,160 --> 01:12:18,322
I almost wept.
1002
01:12:19,560 --> 01:12:21,961
No one had ever done anything like that.
1003
01:12:28,360 --> 01:12:30,362
It was so unexpected.
1004
01:12:31,840 --> 01:12:33,524
So natural.
1005
01:12:42,760 --> 01:12:44,808
I love you.
1006
01:12:46,480 --> 01:12:48,369
I love you.
1007
01:12:49,440 --> 01:12:51,408
Did you come?
1008
01:12:52,040 --> 01:12:53,883
Yes.
1009
01:12:54,520 --> 01:12:55,806
Mark is breathing well...
1010
01:12:55,960 --> 01:12:57,724
...learning to pace himself.
1011
01:12:57,880 --> 01:13:01,601
There is no real impediment
to a variety of sexual activities...
1012
01:13:01,760 --> 01:13:04,411
...given the right sort of partner.
1013
01:13:05,440 --> 01:13:06,851
His deeper emotional needs...
1014
01:13:07,000 --> 01:13:10,721
...are outside the scope
of my potential involvement.
1015
01:13:18,920 --> 01:13:21,082
What happens when...?
1016
01:13:22,880 --> 01:13:25,326
What happens when what?
1017
01:13:26,280 --> 01:13:29,409
When people become attached
to each other.
1018
01:13:29,920 --> 01:13:32,924
What people?
Just people.
1019
01:13:33,080 --> 01:13:35,526
What's the chemistry in it all?
1020
01:13:36,560 --> 01:13:39,723
When people are attracted to each other.
Are you attracted to me?
1021
01:13:39,880 --> 01:13:41,609
God, no.
Ha-ha-ha.
1022
01:13:41,760 --> 01:13:44,047
I'm just talking hypothetically.
1023
01:13:44,200 --> 01:13:46,248
Hypothetically...
1024
01:13:46,720 --> 01:13:49,246
...they write poems.
1025
01:13:49,680 --> 01:13:51,762
They have sex.
1026
01:13:53,920 --> 01:13:55,968
And what happens next?
1027
01:13:56,160 --> 01:13:58,811
After poetry and sex?
1028
01:14:00,200 --> 01:14:02,043
Nothing or everything.
1029
01:14:02,200 --> 01:14:04,601
The rest is by negotiation, as it were.
1030
01:14:04,760 --> 01:14:06,444
What do you mean?
1031
01:14:06,960 --> 01:14:11,409
I mean, you can leave
it at love and attraction...
1032
01:14:12,200 --> 01:14:16,489
...or you can make things complicated,
like most people do.
1033
01:14:18,440 --> 01:14:20,204
Have you?
1034
01:14:22,800 --> 01:14:24,484
Yes.
1035
01:14:25,560 --> 01:14:27,847
Then, afterwards...
1036
01:14:29,200 --> 01:14:30,964
...there was this...
1037
01:14:32,120 --> 01:14:33,724
...moment.
1038
01:14:35,640 --> 01:14:39,326
This glimpse of an awful sadness to come.
1039
01:14:45,560 --> 01:14:48,131
Can I use the phone?
Sure.
1040
01:14:48,280 --> 01:14:50,647
Will you call their room?
1041
01:14:50,840 --> 01:14:52,649
Hold on.
1042
01:14:53,480 --> 01:14:55,084
Thanks.
1043
01:15:02,000 --> 01:15:05,243
What should we do next time?
Any requests?
1044
01:15:08,000 --> 01:15:09,161
Mark?
1045
01:15:09,320 --> 01:15:11,243
I'm thinking.
1046
01:15:13,640 --> 01:15:16,450
We have two sessions left
Is that correct?
1047
01:15:17,400 --> 01:15:18,640
That's right, or...
1048
01:15:19,360 --> 01:15:20,850
Or what?
1049
01:15:21,720 --> 01:15:24,121
Or we could stop now.
1050
01:15:26,000 --> 01:15:28,002
You mean make this the last session?
1051
01:15:28,160 --> 01:15:29,491
Yes.
1052
01:15:35,760 --> 01:15:39,890
What do you think we should do? It's not we.
It's you, Mark. It's up to you.
1053
01:15:40,040 --> 01:15:43,487
I want to know how you feel.
That doesn't come into it.
1054
01:15:43,680 --> 01:15:45,330
Yes, it does.
1055
01:15:45,480 --> 01:15:48,131
I don't just write poems to anyone.
1056
01:15:49,960 --> 01:15:52,201
Mark, what do you want me to say?
1057
01:15:52,400 --> 01:15:55,051
How much I was touched by that?
1058
01:15:55,200 --> 01:15:59,125
How special this has been for me?
1059
01:16:00,400 --> 01:16:03,324
That's not gonna help you.
It's gonna make it worse.
1060
01:16:03,800 --> 01:16:06,565
So you're saying that...
1061
01:16:07,080 --> 01:16:09,731
...the sixth session, that would be it?
1062
01:16:09,880 --> 01:16:11,564
That would be it.
1063
01:16:14,520 --> 01:16:16,329
If it's any consolation...
1064
01:16:16,480 --> 01:16:19,245
...it's also hard for me to think about it.
1065
01:16:22,280 --> 01:16:24,203
Then maybe we should
pull the plug now.
1066
01:16:24,360 --> 01:16:25,407
I think we should.
1067
01:16:29,400 --> 01:16:33,166
I guess you might as well save
that money. Buy yourself a futon.
1068
01:16:41,280 --> 01:16:43,089
Just a second.
1069
01:16:52,600 --> 01:16:53,931
Bye, Mark.
1070
01:16:56,200 --> 01:16:57,611
Bye.
1071
01:17:07,120 --> 01:17:09,282
Everything all right?
He did great. See you.
1072
01:17:09,440 --> 01:17:11,886
Sorry. I have to run.
Okay.
1073
01:17:45,880 --> 01:17:48,042
You forgot this.
1074
01:18:04,000 --> 01:18:05,604
Thank you.
1075
01:18:50,320 --> 01:18:55,406
I wanted to believe that because of Cheryl
my life had changed, but it hadn't.
1076
01:18:57,240 --> 01:18:59,891
I just kept thinking, "Is that it?
1077
01:19:01,720 --> 01:19:02,881
Is that all there is?"
1078
01:19:06,640 --> 01:19:09,211
I think you've done a great thing.
1079
01:19:21,240 --> 01:19:24,528
So is this your first time?
It is. I'm converting.
1080
01:19:24,680 --> 01:19:26,330
Oh, wonderful.
1081
01:19:26,480 --> 01:19:28,721
Come here.
I need to look at your hands...
1082
01:19:28,880 --> 01:19:31,611
...your fingernails and your toenails.
1083
01:19:31,760 --> 01:19:34,286
So, what do you do?
1084
01:19:34,760 --> 01:19:37,843
I don't think you'd understand.
You can try me.
1085
01:19:38,040 --> 01:19:39,724
Okay.
1086
01:19:39,920 --> 01:19:43,049
I'm a housewife.
Why shouldn't I understand?
1087
01:19:43,200 --> 01:19:45,680
Maybe I was mistaken.
Turn around.
1088
01:19:45,880 --> 01:19:47,609
And drop your robe halfway.
1089
01:19:47,800 --> 01:19:50,804
I'm gonna check for any
loose hairs on your back.
1090
01:19:50,960 --> 01:19:53,167
That looks good.
I'll take the robe...
1091
01:19:53,320 --> 01:19:55,891
...and you can let your
hair down now.
1092
01:19:56,040 --> 01:19:58,281
I see you're very comfortable being naked.
1093
01:19:58,480 --> 01:20:00,687
It's never been one of my problems.
1094
01:20:01,800 --> 01:20:04,963
Sometimes new brides
come with their mothers.
1095
01:20:05,120 --> 01:20:08,806
"Do I have to take this off?
Can I please leave this on?"
1096
01:20:08,960 --> 01:20:10,803
They've never been naked before.
1097
01:20:10,960 --> 01:20:12,962
"No, honey, it all has to come off."
1098
01:20:13,160 --> 01:20:15,891
And it does?
And it does.
1099
01:20:16,080 --> 01:20:21,484
They stand at the edge of this pool
with nothing to cling to but themselves.
1100
01:20:21,640 --> 01:20:23,961
Nothing to hide behind.
1101
01:20:24,120 --> 01:20:25,610
This is your body.
1102
01:20:26,520 --> 01:20:29,763
This is the body that God
crafted for you.
1103
01:20:33,120 --> 01:20:34,360
Okay, Mark.
1104
01:20:34,520 --> 01:20:36,682
You can open your eyes now.
1105
01:20:41,920 --> 01:20:43,843
This is your body.
1106
01:20:51,280 --> 01:20:53,248
This is your body.
1107
01:20:55,200 --> 01:20:57,931
Here among the...
1108
01:20:58,120 --> 01:21:01,124
Oh, about 37,000 here tonight at the Stick.
1109
01:21:01,400 --> 01:21:03,448
Local boy makes good...
1110
01:21:03,600 --> 01:21:07,366
...first time back in a visiting uniform.
1111
01:21:07,520 --> 01:21:11,730
Runner on first with one out
to the lanky left fielder.
1112
01:21:11,880 --> 01:21:13,689
And the pitch.
1113
01:21:13,840 --> 01:21:18,209
And he struck him out!
I don't think he was expecting that.
1114
01:21:20,000 --> 01:21:22,401
Yeah, you can do it. Come on.
1115
01:22:02,240 --> 01:22:04,641
The person you are calling is not in.
1116
01:22:04,800 --> 01:22:06,325
Please leave a message.
1117
01:22:07,800 --> 01:22:11,282
Rod. I need your help.
1118
01:22:11,440 --> 01:22:13,010
The power's gone out...
1119
01:22:13,160 --> 01:22:15,049
...including the pump on the iron lung.
1120
01:22:15,240 --> 01:22:19,006
I'd say I got about three hours
before I start to turn blue.
1121
01:22:19,440 --> 01:22:21,442
I hope you get this in time.
1122
01:22:21,600 --> 01:22:25,127
It's Mark. I'll try 911.
1123
01:22:32,280 --> 01:22:33,930
Ohh!
1124
01:22:35,480 --> 01:22:37,084
Shit.
1125
01:22:50,280 --> 01:22:52,647
So this is how it ends.
1126
01:23:11,840 --> 01:23:13,729
Mark.
1127
01:23:13,920 --> 01:23:15,809
Can you open your eyes for me, Mark?
1128
01:23:15,960 --> 01:23:17,325
Can you hear me?
1129
01:23:18,600 --> 01:23:20,011
Mark?
1130
01:23:20,160 --> 01:23:22,003
Come on, Mark.
1131
01:23:26,640 --> 01:23:28,529
They'll be letting you go today.
1132
01:23:28,680 --> 01:23:31,524
Whoever looks after you
will leave the portable respirator...
1133
01:23:31,680 --> 01:23:35,366
...switched on at night, fully charged.
You'll have at least one backup system.
1134
01:23:35,520 --> 01:23:37,522
Okay?
Okay.
1135
01:23:38,200 --> 01:23:40,521
How close was I?
1136
01:23:41,520 --> 01:23:43,010
To what?
1137
01:23:44,080 --> 01:23:48,051
You know, to the...
That tunnel thing and the...
1138
01:23:48,200 --> 01:23:53,445
The light and the voice saying,
"Don't go near the light."
1139
01:23:55,520 --> 01:23:59,366
Is that what you remember?
No, I assume I passed out.
1140
01:24:00,040 --> 01:24:02,691
Before that,
I remember feeling sorry for myself.
1141
01:24:02,880 --> 01:24:04,291
Hmm.
1142
01:24:04,880 --> 01:24:07,804
Do you feel relieved now?
No.
1143
01:24:07,960 --> 01:24:11,567
Relieved that Rod got
to me in time, but I...
1144
01:24:12,840 --> 01:24:14,808
I still feel sorry for myself.
1145
01:24:14,960 --> 01:24:18,282
Well, I'm sure there's a cure
for that.
1146
01:24:18,440 --> 01:24:20,522
Do you want to talk to someone or...?
1147
01:24:20,680 --> 01:24:23,365
I feel comfortable talking to you.
1148
01:24:24,560 --> 01:24:27,291
Well, I'm just a volunteer.
1149
01:24:27,440 --> 01:24:29,761
I'm not a therapist.
1150
01:24:29,960 --> 01:24:32,406
I can recommend you
to someone, if you like.
1151
01:24:32,560 --> 01:24:34,403
I'm... I'm sorry to be rude.
1152
01:24:34,560 --> 01:24:37,769
I'm just smiling at the idea
that a therapist...
1153
01:24:37,920 --> 01:24:40,491
...could do anything useful
for me right now.
1154
01:24:40,640 --> 01:24:42,085
My priest couldn't.
1155
01:24:42,240 --> 01:24:44,925
Are you religious?
Yes.
1156
01:24:45,080 --> 01:24:50,246
I would find it absolutely intolerable not
to be able to blame someone for all this.
1157
01:24:55,920 --> 01:24:58,526
Are you?
No.
1158
01:24:58,680 --> 01:25:01,365
I don't... I don't go to any church or...
1159
01:25:01,520 --> 01:25:03,409
I don't think about God very much.
1160
01:25:04,480 --> 01:25:06,847
I do believe there's a...
1161
01:25:07,000 --> 01:25:10,129
...mysterious logic or...
1162
01:25:11,280 --> 01:25:13,123
...poetry to life.
1163
01:25:14,320 --> 01:25:16,288
I guess that makes me
a spiritual type.
1164
01:25:16,440 --> 01:25:18,249
Yes.
1165
01:25:18,400 --> 01:25:20,289
That would count.
1166
01:25:24,680 --> 01:25:26,284
Would you like me to visit you?
1167
01:25:26,440 --> 01:25:28,886
Are you married?
No.
1168
01:25:29,040 --> 01:25:31,486
Do you have a steady boyfriend?
1169
01:25:32,160 --> 01:25:36,210
No.
Then please visit as often as you can.
1170
01:25:37,040 --> 01:25:38,485
Bye.
Bye.
1171
01:25:38,640 --> 01:25:41,644
Take care.
Hey, hang on a second.
1172
01:25:44,480 --> 01:25:46,608
There's just one more thing
I want to tell you.
1173
01:25:47,200 --> 01:25:48,929
What's that?
1174
01:25:51,200 --> 01:25:53,123
I'm not a virgin.
1175
01:25:55,280 --> 01:25:56,441
Go ahead.
1176
01:26:02,120 --> 01:26:04,327
- Thank you for sharing that with me.
- Sure.
1177
01:26:11,040 --> 01:26:12,804
I'm flabbergasted.
1178
01:26:12,960 --> 01:26:14,121
She adores me.
1179
01:26:14,280 --> 01:26:18,444
She'll do anything for me,
and I can get pretty kinky sometimes.
1180
01:26:19,240 --> 01:26:21,891
Here I was,
ready to offer comfort to the forlorn.
1181
01:26:22,040 --> 01:26:24,441
It's supposed to be my specialty.
1182
01:26:24,600 --> 01:26:27,444
Well, I guess I can throw away
that little speech.
1183
01:26:27,600 --> 01:26:32,208
No, no. Please, make the little speech.
1184
01:26:32,360 --> 01:26:33,361
I'd love to hear it.
1185
01:26:34,040 --> 01:26:35,963
Okay, fine. Here goes.
1186
01:26:36,120 --> 01:26:38,168
The meaning of love.
1187
01:26:38,760 --> 01:26:40,285
Love is a journey.
1188
01:26:40,440 --> 01:26:42,010
I like it already.
1189
01:26:46,160 --> 01:26:48,891
That's it. That's all I've got.
I told you, it's short.
1190
01:26:49,040 --> 01:26:51,884
Love is a journey.
Heh.
1191
01:27:09,360 --> 01:27:13,046
I met Susan five years before I died.
1192
01:27:13,240 --> 01:27:16,084
She was the love of my life.
1193
01:27:16,600 --> 01:27:19,080
We had the same priorities.
1194
01:27:19,240 --> 01:27:22,403
Baseball pretty much came first.
1195
01:27:22,560 --> 01:27:25,404
And we wrote each other mushy poems.
1196
01:27:25,560 --> 01:27:29,042
I never expected it, nor did she...
1197
01:27:29,200 --> 01:27:31,885
...but that's often the
way things turn out.
1198
01:27:33,600 --> 01:27:35,728
Susan Fernbach.
1199
01:27:37,560 --> 01:27:40,450
They say there is a cup of life...
1200
01:27:40,600 --> 01:27:43,490
...which is either half
empty or half full...
1201
01:27:43,640 --> 01:27:46,769
...depending on how you feel about things.
1202
01:27:46,920 --> 01:27:49,446
Of course, the two halves were never even.
1203
01:27:50,040 --> 01:27:52,930
Not in my case, that's for sure.
1204
01:27:53,120 --> 01:27:57,284
I mean, look at all the years of
unendurable crap I've had to put up with.
1205
01:27:57,440 --> 01:28:00,171
That fills most of the cup.
1206
01:28:00,960 --> 01:28:03,691
But in the little bit that's left...
1207
01:28:03,880 --> 01:28:05,609
...what do I have to show for myself?
1208
01:28:07,520 --> 01:28:09,602
At the very least...
1209
01:28:09,800 --> 01:28:14,124
...three beautiful women who all loved me.
1210
01:28:14,520 --> 01:28:17,410
And who will all show up at my funeral.
1211
01:28:17,600 --> 01:28:23,642
His was a dynamic voice
in a paralyzed body.
1212
01:28:23,800 --> 01:28:26,201
A life lived fully...
1213
01:28:26,400 --> 01:28:28,801
...long after he should have been dead.
1214
01:28:28,960 --> 01:28:32,328
And against all odds,
by Mark's own admission...
1215
01:28:32,480 --> 01:28:34,767
...he knew love.
1216
01:28:34,920 --> 01:28:36,968
Emotional and physical love.
1217
01:28:38,800 --> 01:28:41,326
And in this way, Mark lived his life.
1218
01:28:41,480 --> 01:28:44,245
Day by day by day...
1219
01:28:44,400 --> 01:28:48,086
...breath by breath by breath.
1220
01:28:48,240 --> 01:28:54,009
For 49 years,
he loved and he was loved.
1221
01:28:59,040 --> 01:29:02,931
And now Susan Fernbach
will read one of Mark's favorite poems.
1222
01:29:10,360 --> 01:29:12,966
This is called:
1223
01:29:13,600 --> 01:29:16,922
"Love Poem for No One in Particular."
1224
01:29:20,640 --> 01:29:23,644
Let me touch you with my words
1225
01:29:24,480 --> 01:29:25,561
For my hands
1226
01:29:25,720 --> 01:29:28,371
Lie limp as empty gloves.
1227
01:29:28,720 --> 01:29:31,485
Let my words stroke your hair
1228
01:29:31,640 --> 01:29:36,202
Slide down your back and tickle your belly.
1229
01:29:36,600 --> 01:29:38,250
For my hands
1230
01:29:38,400 --> 01:29:41,961
Light and free-flying as bricks
1231
01:29:42,120 --> 01:29:45,044
Ignore my wishes and stubbornly refuse
1232
01:29:45,200 --> 01:29:48,886
To carry out my quietest desires
1233
01:29:49,040 --> 01:29:52,965
Let my words enter your mind
1234
01:29:53,400 --> 01:29:54,811
Bearing torches
1235
01:29:55,880 --> 01:29:58,884
Admit them willingly into your being
1236
01:29:59,080 --> 01:30:02,641
So they may caress you gently within
1237
01:30:02,800 --> 01:30:04,211
Within
1238
01:30:05,000 --> 01:30:08,108
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