Original subtitles

Hanna?

- Are you leaving now, or...? - Yeah.

'Cause I was thinking about the completion of the vision statement.

- We need it done before the board meeting. - Yes.

I'll work late tomorrow instead. I'll work late on it all week.

Great.

Ola and I are munching on popcorn and shooting ideas for the Friday quiz.

Nice.

THE YEAR I STARTED MASTURBATING

Hey! What the hell are you doing?

Hey!

Just drive.

- We're having dinner. - The door is open.

Yes, we were having dinner at seven.

Yeah, what time is it now?

Well, it's not seven.

It's five to eight.

- But we have a babysitter. - Yeah...

For fuck's sake.

I don't feel like it now.

Feel like it? We decided.

Aren't you coming?

Sorry.

What?

You got a parking ticket. I had to move the car.

- There you go. - Thanks.

A drink to start with, perhaps?

Yes. A bottle of Moët. Or is it pronounced "Moét"?

Yes. Lovely.

What are we celebrating?

Us. The future...

Maybe.

Okay.

Does that mean that you've done it?

Do you really want me to?

Didn't we sit here six months ago?

You said you would quit your job next month,

and start working out, stop stressing and whatever.

Yeah, but then the job became more fun. And it's nice to be able to afford stuff.

Hey, I have something for you.

Or, well, for us.

- What's this? - It's arriving in two weeks.

Are you joking?

A bottle of champagne, similar to Moët.

You bought a couch that cost more than a Tesla without talking to me?

You love surprises. You said that you like surprises.

Breakfast in bed, that's a nice surprise.

A giant couch named The Swan... Not really a nice surprise.

I paid for it with my own money.

- Did you have a look at the menu? - I was just about to do that.

Yes.

So just because you make more money than me, it doesn't matter what I think?

No. Oh my God. That's really not the case. I'm sorry.

Well, are we ready?

I would really like to recommend our climate-smart pilgrim scallops.

- Thank you, we'll have them. - Yes.

- You're doing it again. - Doing what?

Deciding what I'm eating. What if I want something else?

- Something else...? - Yes.

We do have a dark horse on the menu right now, "Rocky Mountain Oyster".

- Yes, I'll have that. - That's a go?

You know you ordered bull testicles, right?

We recommend that you order seven or eight different dishes.

If you are a party of two, you can share some, pick some, bicker some--

It's his decision, so that's...

Just choose.

Yes.

So...

"Herring." Herring...

Or I could of course bring you a selection of my favorites.

- Yes, let's do that. - Thank you.

Yes. Thank you.

- What? - No, nothing.

I decided that she should decide. It's not the same thing.

Yes. Absolutely. Exactly.

- Morten. - Hi!

Hey.

I was in the neighborhood and remembered you said you were coming here.

I thought, "I'll pop in for a beer," but it's crowded at the bar. No service.

What the hell?

- Do you know who I saw outside? - No.

Oscar. You know, with the pageboy haircut and sweatband, my old PT.

You know, he used to be muscular as shit.

Do you know how scrawny he's become?

I said, "Shit, what have you done?"

He said, "I'm on a keto diet."

"No, you really shouldn't be," I thought. But I didn't say it. It didn't look good.

- Yeah. - I mean... Hi.

- I'm gonna take a leak. - Yes. See you. Yes.

Did you tell him we're having a date night?

He's allowed to be here if he wants.

What's the problem?

- No. No problem. - Good.

So... I'm really going to make an effort so we can do stuff like this more often.

Our beverage package--

For the love of God, we're in the middle of a sensitive conversation.

I'm sorry, but...

- No. - Thank you.

Fucking consumer society.

I mean... Seriously.

Aren't you answering?

No. I'm here with you now.

Something might be up with Eli.

Hello?

Hi, Hanna. You need to come home right away.

What? Has something happened?

No, but Eli wants you to come.

"Eli wants"? You're watching him. We haven't even been here an hour.

But his bond to you...

It's critical for the child's sense of safety, and for not feeling abandoned.

- To be able to regulate your emotions-- - We'll be right there.

Bread made with black oats.

Can we have the bill, please?

Of course. Then I wish you good night.

Tusen takk, like you say in Norway.

Yes, thank you so much. Okay.

Are you coming?

Is that fermented milk?

Yes. Are you coming?

Yeah, I'm just going to clean up a bit.

Did you pick up the hemorrhoid cream?

- No, I'll pick it up tomorrow. - What?

Shush! He just fell asleep.

Mommy, I'm thirsty.

Here. We'll put it down here.

There you go.

Aren't you going to stop eating that fermented milk and eat me?

What?

Mr. Yoghurt Man, will you eat my yoghurt?

I'm very tired, Hanna. Can't we just wait until tomorrow?

Come here, my darling.

Ow.

Ow!

- Wild cat. - I'm sorry.

Wait.

You told me to eat you.

Yes, but can you come inside me, so we can make a little mini-me.

I'm ovulating.

Or... Or mini-you.

I need to get up early tomorrow, six a.m. I don't have the energy.

What do you mean, "don't have the energy"?

The restaurant, The Swan...

- And The Swan is...? - The couch.

But you know I can't come on my own.

You're talking about having a baby. It doesn't exactly make me horny.

You don't even have the time for the family you have, Hanna.

I don't understand what you're thinking.

Okay, well...

I'll do it, then.

Do what?

I'll quit my job.

If that's what you want, then quit.

- Yes, I wanted to-- - Wait.

- Obama. - I, uh...

There was actually something that I--

I forgot to fix that.

There's something I want to talk to you about.

It's not easy, but I thought...

I've noticed that you haven't been doing that well lately.

All I can say is that you are not alone.

My sister-in-law went through the same thing for several years.

Here.

- What's that? - The women's shelter.

- And ask to speak to Sofia. A great girl. - What?

If you ask me, I think you should leave that damn bastard.

- No, but... - You deserve someone a lot better.

Yes, but that's not it. He's not like that.

You are a strong woman.

You're smart, you're great, you're nice,

and most of all... you're really fucking good.

What's this?

You are now our representative in all international matters.

But you said that would be impossible.

Congratulations.

Uh... Okay...

You're going to go to festivals.

Cannes, Venice, Berlinale, San Sebastián, Gothenburg...

Yes, I know. But that wasn't why I came here.

I wanted to talk to you about... I've been under a lot of stress.

I'm not sure if you've noticed. Maybe it's been hard for me to show it.

You don't have to sit here and give excuses.

It can happen to anyone. Strong women, weak women, men...

But there is help.

- Alcoholics Anonymous. - No...

Google it.

The thing is that this job would mean a lot more stress.

But you will be able to handle it.

If anyone can do it, it's you.

You're the brightest person here. You're the best employee we've had.

You're fantastic. You're irreplaceable.

I can't think of anyone better.

You're well liked, you're good with people, languages, English...

- It's... Wow. - Yes, but...

What did you want to talk about?

Well, I came here... I came here to...

I wanted to...

I want a raise.

- Is that him? - Yes. Sorry, but I...

He knows you're at work, right?

- He doesn't respect you. - No.

- Well, I'll think about this and-- - I'll give you a thousand a month.

- Yes, but-- - Two thousand.

But you can't say anything to anyone. Especially not Ola.

I mean, anyone can do my job.

Anyone.

I'm grateful. I'm grateful...

I...

What?

- I was just wondering what floor. - I'm just going up and down.

Okay. Got it.

Anyone can do my job. I mean, anyone. Ola.

No...

So, down again? Or...?

No... Just press the sixth floor. I'm going to do it.

Good for you.

- Hi. - Hi.

I want to talk about something.

It'll have to be a walk-and-talk. I need to get home. Lasse has thrown up.

Okay... Lasse?

Yeah, the kids' goldendoo... Our goldendoodle.

- Shit. Okay. - It's chaos at home.

But I thought, I just want to...

If we could just... I quit.

God. Are you okay?

Damn!

Three thousand, then. I can't do more.

It's actually not about money. But thank you.

You need to think this over. Go home and just--

No, I've made up my mind.

But what about the report you're doing?

- And the festivals? The Christmas party? - Yes, I know.

Maybe it's a dumb thing to say about one's job, but it's really not that hard.

I mean, anyone could do it. Even Asrin.

- Asrin, who...? - Yes, Golnaz' niece. The intern.

She would do a great job.

I need to start prioritizing other things.

- I'm sorry. - Is this one of those Machu Picchu things?

No.

No one else can be Eli's mother, so...

Yeah. Fuck it. And I...

I'm sorry. I'll comp off my overtime. No need to drag it out.

Yes, sorry.

You've reached Morten. Leave a message after the beep.

Stop, look, listen.

Hi. I didn't think you could make the Wednesday training sessions.

I've done it.

Done what? You broke up with Morten?

No, God. I quit my job.

Why?

You know, it's been really stressful, and I promised Morten to kind of--

What do you mean, you promised Morten? This isn't the '50s.

You're allowed to have a boyfriend and a family and a career. It's fine.

That's what you think.

Well, never mind. It's done now.

Yeah, but it's not "never mind". It's going to look bad on your resume.

And we just updated your LinkedIn profile.

Fuck!

- What is it? - My milk ducts are blocked.

My whole fucking body hurts, and just leaks and sweats.

My cunt feels like sandpaper.

Come on now, girls. Let's go! No resting here, right? Come on!

- I delivered a baby three months ago. - Just go for it. Show me.

Sandpaper, huh?

Sandpaper. Petter has a chafed dick.

Will you come with me to check out party venues this week? My 40th birthday party.

I won't be able to. I have so much to take care of for Saturday.

Girls, is resting all you do here?

- Let's work as hard as the others. - Yes!

She'll be 40 soon, this one!

All the more reason to work hard. Come on.

Forty, that's when doors really start closing, Hanna.

You know the risk of a miscarriage increases by 50%?

- Hi. - And birth defects.

Petter also wanted to work out.

- Do you have a babysitter? - No, Ebbe is sleeping in his stroller.

He's at child care.

What?

But Petter!

What the hell? He's three months old!

He's a baby! You can't just hand him in like a coat!

Ebbe! Darling!

- Damn it! - What?

You're out of your mind!

What? A kettlebell could fall over on him.

I need to buy rain pants and pick up a photo book and get some stuff done.

- Yes... Bye. - Bye.

- Remember the naming ceremony on Saturday. - Of course.

- I was supposed to be training. - What?

Okay, let go.

Do you think Daddy will be happy now?

Can you paint me like a zombie?

A zombie?

I can do that.

Some brain here? Some brain.

With the white.

Let's do it this way.

You're...

That's great.

And hold your arms out like this.

Hello?

What?

Hi!

We came as fast as we could.

Hey, sweetie. Is that the Hulk?

What happened?

He grabbed an e-scooter at lunch, and a pickpocket showed up.

I was registering my e-scooter, and felt someone grab something in my back pocket.

So I drove after him and tried to stop him,

but then my front wheel got stuck in the tramway rail,

and I sprained my leg. And my AirPods were wrecked.

- Oh, God. - Yeah.

And then you ended up here in the hospital?

Yes.

Eli, would you like to go and get an ice cream with Ali?

- What? No. Shit. - I want ice cream.

Okay. Yeah, I was going to get coffee anyway. Oat milk?

- Yes, please. - Okay. Excuse me.

How are you feeling?

What do you think? Did you even listen to what I just said?

There we go. Here's a little paracetamol.

- Thank you. - Water.

You're sweet.

Thanks. You think so?

Yes, that means nice. He's Danish, so...

Let's see.

It's so crazy that you fell on an e-scooter. I've done that too.

- You've done it too? No! - Yes.

I've fallen too, actually.

Although it was on a bike.

And it wasn't that bad, actually.

No.

I keep wondering if this will change me.

You believe the best about others.

Exactly. You work with people...

I know what you mean. I am the same. That's why I chose to become a nurse.

- Really? - Yes.

I work with people too, actually. Although a little more creatively.

- I'm afraid I have to go. - Okay.

- But I'll be back. - Lovely.

- Get some rest. - Okay. Thanks. See you.

Yes.

You don't work with people.

I mean, there are people where you work,

but that's not what me and Louise were talking about.

- You and Louise? - Yes.

Yeah, okay, I get that I might not have been

the best in the world with all this home stuff,

but that wll change.

Ow, damn it!

- I'm sorry. - Why do you have to grip it so hard?

- Ah, thank you. - Here.

Where's Eli?

He found an airplane in the playroom, I think.

Okay, but... We need to talk a little, so maybe you could go outside for a bit?

Maybe he needs peace and quiet. Did you think about that?

Maybe you can stop hanging around in his room like a little sticker?

Hanna.

When we get home, want me to make a hot fudge sundaes that you love?

Hot fudge sundae? He's lactose intolerant. Do you even know what he needs?

Excuse me?

He has to end up in a hospital to get some warmth.

The nurse was better at it than you.

Yeah, but she's probably done a thousand courses in it. It's her damn job.

Damn it, I'm warm, right?

You are a lot of things, but you are sure as hell not warm and chill.

No.

Who's more chill than me?

Hey, like, my whole phone book.

- Alexander... - Chill.

Chill.

- Anton... - Chill.

- Mega chill. Maybe too chill... - Smokes a lot of weed.

- Ariana... - Nah. The same.

She's like you.

But you won't let me near you. You just get annoyed when I want to cuddle.

And why do you think that is?

I only matter to you when you want something.

I mean, please, can you just give him some water? He's choking.

Buddy, you want some water?

Do you know how hard it is to live with someone who feels offended all the time?

Who's never happy and always blames me for everything?

Okay, maybe you shouldn't be with me, then.

What?

I could have died today.

I...

I don't want this anymore.

We're not good for each other.

Are you breaking up with me?

Believe me, I have really tried to make this work.

Yes, but...

Hey.

I quit my job, for fuck's sake. For you.

Or for us.

You quit your job? Why the hell did you do that?

That's what you wanted! That's all you've been going on about, that I work too much.

But it won't change you, Hanna.

I...

You can obviously stay in the apartment until you find somewhere else.

If you don't have anywhere to go.

Of course I can find somewhere else to move to, but...

I know it sounds harsh, but I have to do this.

All you have given me is stress and hemorrhoids.

I'll stay at Ali's this weekend, so you can pack in your own time.

Mm. Okay.

Fine, I'll move out.

On one condition.

That we see a therapist. We have a child together, damn it!

Here.

So fucking immature!

Was that true?

Hi, you've reached Carolin. I can't answer the phone right now,

but if you leave your name and number, I'll get back to you as soon as I can.

Why are you crying, Mommy?

- I'm so happy that I'm your mother. - Okay.

I'll be staying with Carolin for a while.

Why?

Because she's... a little sad, and she... needs my help.

Yeah, okay.

But you and me, we will be able to...

see each other whenever we want and speak on the phone, anytime.

ASSHOLE

- Hi. - Hi, Hanna.

I'm sorry, it's been insanely stressful at home with Morten.

It's just chaos. I need...

somewhere to live for a couple of days.

I got you.

Yes. There.

I've been waiting for you to get in touch.

Yeah...

What the hell, Hanna? Ebbe's naming ceremony.

You were supposed to be Ebbe's godmother.

We've thought about our relationship over the weekend,

and we feel that we've had enough.

What do you mean, "we feel"?

You're just going to have to respect what we're saying.

Okay...

Well, I'm sorry.

Huh? I'm not...

You've been wrapped up in this baby thing.

You haven't had time to get together either.

Check into a hotel. You can afford it.

Yeah, but I emptied my account for that damned Swan, so...

It's a big, fucking couch, but it doesn't matter.

I just don't want to be alone right now.

I'm sorry, Hanna. I can't be the friend you need right now.

We'll be in touch.

- Hi, Hanna! - Hi, Mom.

Is everything okay? Yes, I'll be right there.

Well, actually, no--

Hey, I can barely hear you. It's this damn phone.

And I can't really talk right now. Hey, can I call you back later?

- Okay, but I-- - Here's your coffee.

Bye.

LOOKING (FOR A FRIEND) FOR TEMPORARY ACCOMMODATION IN STOCKHOLM.

Hi, this is Beata Franzén.

I'm calling regarding the party venue you were supposed to look at today.

Hi.

I'm sorry, my life has been really chaotic...

No problem, I'll reschedule. Tuesday at 7:00 p.m.?

Yes, that will be great. Thank you.

Excuse me. We're closing.

Okay. I just need to use the restroom, if I may.

No drugs or anything, we have a zero policy on that.

No. Absolutely not.

Don't you have anywhere to go?

Yeah. Of course I do.

My things, can I just leave them here?

I don't think anyone will take them.

CONTACTS

Hello?

Hi, Leyla. It's Hanna.

Hanna? Hanna who?

Hanna from ninth grade.

- No! - Hi!

I mean, are you kidding me? You're kidding!

Did you miss me? Are you moving in, or what's happening?

Hi! I mean, look at you!

No, you still don't have a butt.

No, no butt.

Damn, this is nice. You've really gotten your life together.

I don't know about "gotten", it was hardly for free.

Well, hey, that's the little one's room.

She is super spoiled.

The kitchen, the upstairs, the living room,

the fireplace... It's not on right now. There's a pool.

And here's Emir's room. He's 17 now.

You can sleep in here.

Teenagers, man...

Damn, I don't get it. They're so damn filthy.

But where are they now?

They're visiting Micke's mom in Dalarna, driving home tonight.

I had a meeting.

I put clean sheets in the bottom bunk. He'll sneak in when he gets home.

You would have had the guest room, but we're redecorating it.

- No, this is fine. - Okay.

- Thanks. - It beats sleeping on the street.

Hi.

Good morning.

Did everyone already eat?

Please, Hanna. It's 10:30. They've gone to work and school.

- I'm working from home today. - Yes.

You're bringing out my wild teenage self as usual, I guess.

Except being 14 is a bit different than being 40, huh?

- Double espresso. - Thank you.

I know someone you can go to with that.

With what?

Okay. Is it very visible?

It's super visible.

But, hey... What's happened?

Well, we have...

We've just taken a break.

We have a couples therapist you can go to. He's into God and stuff.

Not the average guy. Family values, you know.

- He will get you two back together again. - You think?

I'm sure of it. I'll send you his number.

I'll send you the girl's number as well, for the...

For this to be meaningful,

I think you both need to think very carefully about

if either of you want to stay together.

I mean, I want to...

if he can change and all that.

What goes through your mind when Hanna says that? Do you want her to change?

No, I mean...

I can't do this anymore. My body is giving up, damn it.

Bite the bullet, for God's sake... Women have done it for thousands of years.

It sounds like you want to assign blame, Hanna.

Yes.

I mean, most couples have things they need to work on in their relationship,

but it's not always doable.

In those cases you have to be able to face another scenario.

Otherwise the situation can become very... deadlocked.

This feels very vague.

Can't we just make some sort of deal that...

I start prioritizing you, and you stop whining?

Hanna, you need someone you can't boss around.

Or someone who doesn't mind it. Someone very strong or someone very weak.

Could we grab something to eat?

I have to get back to work.

Can you look after Eli on Thursday?

Yes.

What are you going to do?

I have a meeting.

A meeting? What, do you have a date?

With whom?

I have fought for this relationship for two years.

You've been so busy, you didn't even see how bad I felt. It's too late now.

I want a silver lining every day, not just whenever you have the time for it.

I'm fighting like a goddamn animal to make ends meet, and to make us money.

The only thing you care about is that damn silver lining.

Yes, because I want to feel good now.

Don't forget we're meeting Eli's teacher tomorrow morning at eight.

Are you kidding me?

Do you know how Eli got his damn waterproof trousers in the right size?

- Why are we talking about trousers? - What did he give Hampus for his birthday?

Do you have any idea? No, because I buy all that stuff. I get this stuff done.

I do the shopping, I do the baking... You don't even notice it!

You're the one who forgets Eli's things, and I'm the one who reminds you!

You can change your own damn toilet rolls.

Goddamn silver lining! We're parents, for fuck's sake!

Excuse me. The card was declined.

Do you have another one you could try, or maybe you can call someone?

Hey, I wasn't done. Can I...?

Hey.

- The financial yuppie dudes in the corner. - Yes?

- They haven't been served. - I'll take care of it.

- Take care of it. - I promise.

He is so damn uncool. He thinks he fucking owns me.

You know what? Forget about payment. It's on him.

Yes, let's do that.

By the way, did you find somewhere to live?

Yes... Sort of.

That's great. Congratulations! Nice!

Here I am.

You forgot your phone.

It's someone called Asshole. Is that your boyfriend?

It's my ex.

Shouldn't you go in and take care of those... corporate dudes?

Your boss seemed pretty pissed at you.

Yeah, I guess maybe I should.

But his chi, it's like... Something is fucked up with it.

I mean, it's like... His energies are all over the place.

He should be super-worried.

But I'm not.

Liv? You're not getting paid to sit here and chat, you know.

I'm sorry, but... I feel like you're mad now.

I'm sensing your anger.

Look, he becomes all flushed.

He doesn't seem at all receptive for an adult conversation.

If I'm a thousand percent honest, this job wasn't a perfect fit anyway.

You know what? I quit.

My bag...

Ah, fuck it. I'll get it myself.

Come on. We're going to The Lady and the Titty.

- Don't look so scared. It'll be fun. - Where are we going?

Shot race.

You look great, but I think you should change your top.

- What? - Just try it on.

What is this?

Wait. I'll apply some eyeshadow.

- Is this for a baby? - You'll look great in that.

Stop worrying about a job. Just get a new one.

And besides, you're the one choosing them, not the other way around.

Hey, how are you doing, really?

You kind of feel a little...

blocked.

What?

What does the pussy say? Is it disappointed too?

I don't know, should it say something?

Yes, you have to listen!

You need to let your pussy free.

Otherwise, you will be dead before you're 40.

I'm 40 in a couple of weeks.

Then you're in a hurry.

Close your eyes. And think about your pussy.

Do you feel it throbbing?

That's all your unused life energy.

That's where your life engine is. You need to let it out.

What am I supposed to--?

Stop being such a dork and do what I say.

Check out someone hot, and do the thinking with the inside of your vagina.

Then look away for four seconds.

Then look back.

Sometimes you just need something like that to get the system going.

Pussy first.

Check it out.

- Be quiet and leave before they wake up. - Okay.

Nice, a tribal.

Damn, that's retro.

When did you get it?

- Ninety-eight. - Ninety-eight?

That's when I was born.

Hanna.

Hi.

I'm sorry!

- I'm really... - Please.

- Here's your top. - You were supposed to leave.

The other way...

Fuck, I forgot my phone.

Hey, I'll... See ya.

Bye.

- Hi. - Hi.

Sorry. I forgot my phone. Can I...?

Okay.

Thanks. I think...

Right. Here it is.

Do you want these?

No, I'm fine, thanks.

I recognize you.

Do you go to Maria too?

- The addiction treatment center? - No.

- Hello? - Hi!

Are you on your way?

Yes, I'm on my way.

There was just a little... But yeah, I'm coming.

Bye.

Hey, excuse me. Could I...?

Hi! God, I'm sorry.

I'm late.

Insanely stressful morning. Sorry.

Thanks for waiting.

Really.

Have I missed something?

We're...

I thought that maybe we could get a coffee--

- What the hell is wrong with you? - There are kids here.

You pulled out a used fucking condom in front of the teacher.

And what the hell are you wearing?

What the hell is wrong with you?

Where's Eli?

Leave him be. You'll just scare him.

Hi!

Hi, sweetie! Hi, my love. I've missed you.

When are you coming home?

It's going to take some time before Mommy comes home, you know.

But you can come to me on Thursday, we can have ice cream...

I have something for you.

You do?

Thank you.

Now Mommy has to go.

Okay.

Hey, Morten...

Wait!

Hey, Morten!

The most hated woman in Sweden after Bride of Christ.

Hi, babe. Quattro Stagioni?

Shit, it was just chaos with that dude.

And my back is killing me.

Forget him. He is not important.

This is about you and your life energy. Focus on that.

Like masturbating, are you not doing it enough?

Not enough? Like, never.

Are you kidding me?

Well, I get bored.

I just lie there and think about what I'm going to buy, shop, take care of...

Cleaning and shit.

If I ever have the time, then I'm just tired, not horny.

All the research shows that masturbation frees crazy amounts of feel-good hormones.

- Great for a backache. - I'm taking your Coke.

Oxytocin, dopamine, it lowers the level of cortisol in your body,

strengthens your immune system, you sleep better...

Weird that I have survived all these years.

But that's, like, the thing.

You're a perfect example of how worn your hair, skin and nails get

when you don't masturbate enough.

I'm going to show you something. Vital information, so pay attention.

What are you doing?

This is your vagine.

This is the mons veneris, these are the labia, this is the vagina.

This is the clitoris. You figured it out, right?

Yes. You're being so loud...

Then you might also know it's the only organ that exists only for pleasure.

It has eight fucking thousand nerve endings, and you never even cared.

Do you realize what you've been missing?

Anyway... Here, about three to five centimeters up is the G-spot.

That's what makes you able to get lovely fountain orgasms or, like, squirt.

And then, in between the anus and the vagina, that's your M-spot.

With some light pressure here you can have the greatest orgasm in the world.

Below that, if you rotate... Imagine that you're turning... There.

So that you're against the anus.

This soft and nice back wall, towards the anal, that's your O-spot.

- The shrimp? - The shrimp.

Obviously most easily stimulated through anal sex.

Then there's the P-spot. It's on the urethral orifice.

If you stimulate it right, you can come exactly like dudes.

It's an amusement park, and you've never even cared.

A woman's body is wasted on you. You should have been a man.

Thanks.

Why are you still here? Go home and masturbate!

Home? I don't have a home.

Buy the thing in my text and find a corner to masturbate in.

I have to go. I want to hear everything about the masturbation thing later.

- Yes. - Yes.

Pussy first. Bye, babe. Kisses!

Did it taste good?

- Kisses. - Yes. I can pay for us.

Oh my. Hanna.

I've called, but you haven't picked up.

- Is... Has something happened? - No, Mom. Nothing's happened.

I wanted to ask if I could stay here for a while.

I mean, there's no peace and quiet to work at home, so I just thought...

- Of course you can stay here. - You're on your way somewhere.

No, of course we'll cancel it if you need us.

I'll call Gunilla. I'll tell her we're not coming.

- New shoes? Chic. - Yeah. No...

How are you doing?

I'm fine.

I just have a lot on my plate right now.

Did he break up with you?

Why do you assume that he did?

Yes.

I mean... yes.

- Oh, my... - It'll be fine, honey.

Well, you're very lucky to have a good income, then.

If you're going to be on your own.

I quit my job, too, actually.

Oh, my.

Eva, it'll be fine. A lot of people do freelance work nowadays.

I was actually going to do some freelance work.

TORCH MARCH AGAINST NUCLEAR WEAPONS WOMEN FOR PEACE

Hello?

Hi! It's Beata. You had an appointment for viewing our party venue yesterday.

Mm. There won't be any damn party.

No...

- Good morning. - Morning, sweetie. Did you sleep well?

Absolutely.

Or... Not really.

- Coffee? - Yes, please.

- Here you go. - Thank you.

- What is it? - No, it's nothing.

I'm just thinking that maybe it's good for you to take it easy for a bit.

You've been working so much.

But work is the only place where I'm not chided for who I am.

But maybe Morten will come back to you if you work a little less.

I know it's been tough, but I didn't think you guys would break up.

I didn't think so either.

Wouldn't it be great if you could work it out? Hanna.

Yes, but I need to get a job.

I mean, there's nothing I want more than to have you here.

Really.

But I already hired someone for your position.

Wow, okay.

- That was quick. - Yes, I gave Asrin the job.

Asrin?

She's great. Thank you.

That was just something I said, it wasn't like...

But she needs an assistant.

My God... Hanna!

Hi! I didn't understand why you quit all of a sudden. Come on! Let's grab a soda.

No, yeah...

Admit it, you got the Netflix job.

- No, I mean-- - Yes, you just...

So damn great that the job goes to a woman, and someone your age!

- Congratulations, fucking Netflix! - Yes...

- Shall we treat ourselves with some sugar? - Yes, thank you.

No, I didn't get that job. I actually don't have a job.

Staffan said that you needed an assistant or help with some things, and I thought...

Yes.

Let me just check my calendar.

Okay. Yes, it's a little tight, but you know what?

We'll squeeze it in.

We can do the interview now.

Interview? Okay, I mean...

I had your job. You were an intern.

Yes, but it's important to do everything correctly, so there's no talk of bias.

And that you have the motivation for the tasks.

That's super important.

So... Are you good at keeping timetables?

Scheduling...?

Yes. Sure.

This one is good.

Which word describes you the best?

Goal-oriented, individualistic or cooperative?

I guess I'm goal-oriented.

And cooperative, and all of it, really, I would say.

Classic answer. Good.

Do you have a basic understanding of the Microsoft package?

Excel and Keynote?

I know you did that course, but I had to help you a bit.

Yes, you had to do that, but that was because I gave you assignments.

You were an intern, so...

Okay, good. I just needed to know.

Exactly.

Okay, and... You know, let's do this one instead.

Can you describe one instance in your career

where you did something extra and delivered above expectations?

What do you know.

- Hi. - Hi.

Time to go up and down with the elevator again?

No.

Take me to where you're going.

Absolutely.

Adam.

Hanna.

My buddies gave me a singing course as a gift.

Let the tonal rise... One of those gift packages. This way.

...all the way up to the main timbre.

- Hi! Welcome. - Hi.

Drop-in, that's nice!

Just keep on breathing. Breathe in.

And out.

And just breathe a few times.

Let out all the stress.

Yes...

Babies can scream endlessly.

Why is that?

- Dogs can bark as much as they want... - I'm sorry, I think I'll--

...without getting a sore throat and getting hoarse. Why?

They use the power of the womb.

Let's do a little barking.

Be my guest, go down on all fours.

And start in your pelvis.

And then you will bark like a big brown Labrador.

Thank you. Fantastic. And now let's bark like a--

Could it be a Cocker Spaniel?

Yes, a Cocker Spaniel. Be my guest.

Wonderful! Thank you! Thank you.

Breathe out all the bad energy, and breathe in the new energy.

Hi.

What's your name?

- Han... Hanna. - Hi, Hanna.

I think we should start with you.

- Okay. - Come.

- Where are we going? - Come.

Come.

- Just relax. - Okay, yes.

Our voice reflects our inner power,

and its vibrations can heal lots of things,

like negative energy and physical problems.

The vagus nerve,

one of our most important internal organs,

is stimulated by singing.

Go ahead. Sing a song.

- What? - Sing a song.

Sing a song?

I can't sing, at all.

I will count to three. Just take whatever first comes to mind.

- No, I'm not at all-- - Yes.

One...

two...

three.

Sing from the womb.

- Whoops! - Please, can you just...?

- Absolutely. - Just let me go. Thank you.

It was just a little...

I need to go to the restroom, and then I have this thing.

Yes. But you're very welcome back.

- Thanks. - Whenever you want.

Let's say bye-bye to Hanna.

Shit, my life is just...

At least you sang from your womb.

I quit my job to be more present in the relationship,

and now we're not together anymore.

So now I don't have my job either.

I mean, yeah, I got the job, but as an assistant to my previous job.

What about you?

What does your gut feeling say?

You have a mom who adores you.

Ouch. No, I wouldn't say that.

You have a child who's under the age of one, but sleeps through the night.

And you have a girlfriend from Nyköping who is about to get a doctor's degree.

Wow. Good guess. But you're wrong.

- But I feel like it's time soon. - With the girl from Nyköping?

Unfortunately, she doesn't exist either.

Okay, so you are simply emotionally open

to being constantly interrupted for four years?

Yes.

Exactly.

Hey, I... wanted to ask if I could take you out to dinner.

Unless you're scared of heights. But you seem brave and open-minded.

ASSHOLE: CAN YOU COME BY WITH ELI'S HARMONICA?

My God, that kiss was amazing, completely different than Morten's.

We're going hang gliding tomorrow.

Some experiential thing.

Okay. But you hardly know each other. You just met.

Yes, but I don't know. There was something special about him.

Okay.

Hey, what are you doing?

I'm sorry. Shit. I'm coming.

Fuck it, now I'm feeling anxious. I'm not doing it. Bad idea.

What does the pussy want?

- My pussy is going gliding. - Good.

...and this is the crossbar, which spreads the wings apart.

And here we have the rigging with the wires.

It's very important to check these, so that they're not twisted.

Then you attach the hook.

There you go. Now you can try to lie down.

Yes. Then we'll hang up the harness like that.

- Hi. - Yes, hi. How are you guys doing?

Good. How are you?

Yeah, I'm all right.

I've got a new job and it's...

It's not at all as demanding, so that's good.

Sounds good.

And I have started to learn to stress down and all that.

I started singing. Or, just once.

And done one of those hang gliding things, when you fly a little and stuff.

I don't know, I feel like I...

I've landed in myself a little bit more now.

Okay. How are you getting on with getting an apartment?

Yes... Well no... I mean, I'm getting there. I'm looking, and stuff.

I did feel a little guilty about it ending the way it did.

But this is my apartment, so...

Yes.

- You wanted to talk to Eli, right? - Yes...

I thought you and I could--

You can talk to Mommy.

Hi.

I love you.

I love you too.

APARTMENTS - MAX 3,500,00 SEK

NO RESULTS

ERSTAGATAN - 5,000 SEK DOKTOR ABELINS GATA - 18,000 SEK

LOUISE HENRIKA AXELSSON, STOCKHOLM NURSING, FRIENDS AND FAMILY

FOLLOW

No!

Damn!

No!

Hey, what happened?

Oh, sorry. No, I... It's just a friend has died, so I...

Oh no, my poor little thing!

- Jeez. Were you close? - Yes, pretty close.

Oh, that's awful.

Thanks.

And here's half a balcony,

a nice French balcony.

Really nice furniture too.

- Seventeen thousand, right? - Nice wallpaper...

Fridge, freezer, stove, microwave...

Huh? It doesn't get any better.

No.

Perfect. And look at this, the bedroom.

Nice view of the courtyard.

Bathroom, shower...

What's in there, then?

It's rented out.

Oh.

But I think you should go for it.

The rent is really good for Södermalm/City.

It doesn't get any better than this.

Hi, Hanna. I'm sorry, I can't talk right now because Petter has a cold,

but I'll call you later, okay? Kisses.

THE RASPBERRY CAVE - A BOOK ON VAGINAL SEX LIV: DID YOU LISTEN?

I'VE RENTED AN UGLY APARTMENT

AND ADAM HAS GHOSTED ME!

WHO'S ADAM? BUY THE STIMULATOR LIKE I SAID

The vagina can be a good gauge of life and how we are feeling.

Seeing the vagina like a person who keeps everything on track for you

can be a tool to get a sense of well-being.

What does the vagina want you to do?

Will the vagina be happy if you cut down on expenses so that you can work less?

If you schedule in some free time,

start dancing, take a bubble bath,

read comics, short porn stories,

take up horse riding?

Does the vagina want you to let out your inner slut?

Does your vagina want you to do things that make you laugh?

Does your vagina think that you...

Are you okay in there?

Yes.

The important thing is to care about others, but to not forget about yourself.

When does the vagina say, "no"?

Hanna?

- Hi. - You know you're late, right?

I had to take all the notes myself at the meeting. It was super stressful.

I'm sorry.

BE ON TIME! IMPORTANT

R.I.P.

Hanna.

Hi.

- Hi. - Everything okay?

I was talking to Asrin, and we felt it would be great

if you could empty the office storeroom.

We need the space.

Uh... Yes.

That's great. I can help you later, but I have a lot on my plate right now, so...

- Now, or...? - That'd be great.

Listen, one more thing. I was thinking about the vision document.

I'm working on it now, and have based it on your old one,

because it was pretty well-structured, I thought.

So I was just thinking, maybe you would like to sort of polish...

Like, polish and finish it.

I'll just see who's calling, then I'll take care of it.

Good.

- Hello? -Hi, Hanna.

I'm standing here with your gigantic couch.

I almost broke my back carrying it up to the apartment.

Could you get someone to come pick it up?

Yes, but it wasn't... It was for you, so what am I supposed to do?

Yes, but it takes up the whole apartment, so please take care of it.

Hi. Carolin can't talk. She's resting.

I can't either. Bye.

- Hi! - Hi.

You okay?

Yes, I'm fine.

Where's... Where's Eli?

- He's playing with Legos. - Hi.

You've met Louise.

Yes, and you check out my Insta stories, right?

Yes, that's right.

Yes, you seem like a really nice girl, so that's good.

A girl who doesn't have anything of her own to, you know...

Yes, who only thinks of you. Food and pillows and stuff.

Shall we take a look at the couch?

- Maybe you want these. - Good. Thanks.

I'll take the painting, too, now that I'm here.

Already?

But it's ours.

Sure, but I have a van, and I was the one who paid for it.

So maybe it's a little bit more mine?

We can't wake him up.

I'm sorry to bother you, but I have to talk to her.

She feels really let down by you, Hanna.

And she's very tired. Hormones and stuff. It's a special thing to become a mother.

Yes, I know. I am a mother.

But you're more of a mom on the side.

- No-- - She doesn't need any girl drama.

- Move over. - She's asleep. Please.

What are you listening to, a fucking anxiety aquarium?

- I mean, I'm sorry. - Hi.

I get that I've been a pain in the ass and that...

I get that I have been all wrapped up in my own stuff.

But I have been through the worst crisis in my whole life,

and you haven't been there at all.

Just because I didn't show up at your new-bourgeoisie fucking naming thing!

I thought our friendship was worth more, but apparently not.

So you know what?

I have been with you through this "getting--"

Stop it.

Go spin a fucking wine bottle or something.

I've been with you through the whole "getting pregnant on your own" thing,

before you met this damn idiot who quotes Joe Rogan and Jordan Peterson.

I have gone with you to Denmark. I've had your back for, like, 20 years.

And then, when I really, really need you, you immediately dump me.

Then I'm a bad friend, all of a sudden.

We don't want this negative energy...

Can you hear this mansplaining fucking know-it-all talking for you? Can you?

Because the echo is fucking big!

Get in touch when you wake up from this psychosis.

There, there...

Well, that was liberating, but it's a bit Agatha Christie-ish.

There's no one left now. No Morten. No Carro. No Adam.

Chill, they seem really uncool anyway.

Come on, chin up.

You know, I usually think all the love songs are about me.

Like, "You are the most beautiful thing,"

and that the pussy is singing to me.

We need to change your track. I can feel it. We can't have this.

First, a little sage cleanse.

It removes all the bad energies and adds good vibes.

We have to get going now.

Sweetie, come here!

Yeah, I'll take that twig.

- I'll try it, I promise. - Good.

Did you have fun?

- Bye, Eli! - Bye.

God, you're jumping so far! I can't jump that far. Whoops!

If you could choose any boat you like--

None. They're all so crappy.

They're not crappy, come on.

Yes. None, I said.

- None? - None.

Meh... Why?

That one.

Yeah, that one's pretty. Not the brown one with the round windows?

No.

Mommy,

it's really nice here.

Yes, isn't it?

Keeping your pussy in mind, you can make decisions that make you feel good.

Hi.

Not just in the moment, but in the long run.

Then you have to ask yourself,

what makes my vagina feel good?

When is my vagina happy?

Does your vagina think you should quit working and start studying?

I emailed you a link to an audiobook. It would be great if you could listen.

- Absolutely, sure. - Great.

- It's no Gunilla Bergström, but... - No problem.

Great. Thank you.

It can be extra exciting to masturbate while watching yourself in the mirror.

You can also try to photograph yourself.

Or do you want to read or see something before or during masturbation,

as a starter or an enhancement of the sensation?

Spread the inner labia.

Lift the clitoral hood.

Spread your pubic hair so that you can see your perineum.

All of these amazing or weird

or goofy or beautiful parts

are there for you to enjoy.

What? Huh? What did I do that was so damn horrible?

Didn't you know that masturbation makes you a happier human being,

and is good for stress and back problems and things?

Yeah, reduces stress... You get more effective at work.

Damn it, 39% of men jerk off at work, and only 6% of women.

They get what it's all about, right?

Ola?

Onanists make better bosses.

Staffan?

Maybe we should have a masturbation break at work.

Vibrators instead of stress balls.

Might be something to add to the Christmas gift bag.

Yes...

Yeah.

No, I'm actually going to finish listening to this chapter, if that's okay.

Yes.

Can we fix this Bluetooth thing? This did get a little weird.

I think you need to log out...

I'll have a look at it.

Stop, look, listen.

Stop, look, and listen.

Hanna!

Wait.

Hey... I've been thinking about you so much.

Did you do the hang gliding?

I'm sorry. I really wanted to go, but everything got messed up.

I wanted to get in touch, but I didn't have your number. I'm sorry.

I didn't even notice you weren't there.

So, how was it?

Amazing. Life-changing. You know.

What about you? Have you been singing anything lately?

No, I mean, my

Mom was taken into a hospice that day, so I was with her.

Oh.

God. How is she, then?

I mean, she has cancer.

So she only has a few weeks left.

Life, you know?

But...

It feels good to think about something else.

I get it if you don't want to make any plans with me now...

But if you're free on Saturday, maybe you can give me another chance.

One small chance.

And damn it, this time we have to exchange phone numbers.

Okay.

- Nothing outside the city center. - Okay.

See you at my place at 8:00 p.m.

- Hi. - Hi. Thanks.

Eli's harmonica.

Why did it take so long?

Did it? I've just been a little busy.

Did you do something?

You look so...

nice.

Thank you. I don't know. I'm less stressed out, I guess.

Okay.

Do you want to come in?

No, I can't, actually.

Thanks for this.

It is so beautiful.

With the photos of that trip. It was... lovely.

- Isn't Louise here? - Huh?

Isn't Louise here?

No, that... It didn't really work out.

It...

- Well, I-- - I was thinking...

I bought an extra ticket to the concert on Saturday. If you want to come?

I think we need to talk after everything that's happened.

Yes...

I'm actually not free on Saturday, but some other time?

Okay. Where are you going?

Do you have a date?

Hug him when he wakes up, for me.

- Bye. - Bye.

- There's something special about Adam. - Okay.

He's so... mature.

Damn, that's nice. I'm so happy for you.

But don't forget, what's important now is you. Pussy first.

- What are you wearing? - I'm wearing, like, a leopard print dress.

A leopard print dress?

I have a T-shirt underneath.

You have a T-shirt underneath? Fashionista.

Yes, well... Wait. I think that's him.

Okay, okay, but pussy first.

Yeah, come on.

- Hi! - Hi.

Hi, sweetie. Aren't you supposed to be in bed? It's eight o'clock.

Yes, but he needs his raincoat.

Okay, but It's not raining now, is it?

No, but in case...

Why are you dressed like that?

I'll go get it, then.

- Hi. - Hi.

Hi...

Sorry. Morten, Adam, Eli.

- Adam. - Hi. Morten.

- Adam. - Yeah.

Adam.

So, do you want this?

No, it's not raining now.

Come on, sweetie.

Bye, sweetie.

I'm sorry. That was a bit weird.

I didn't know he was coming. He just showed up.

- Hi. - Hi.

Adam's been with his mother at the hospice for three days.

- He looks all worn out. - Shit.

That doesn't make me any less horny...

Should I take the T-shirt off?

No, take your panties off. Then the T-shirt.

Is it okay to sleep with someone that sad?

Yes, just take them off.

Wait. He's coming out of the shower now.

- Hi. - Hi.

- Can I do something to help? - No, I've got it.

- Are you sure? - Yes.

- Go to the couch, I'll be right there. - Okay.

Go in and be your most sensual you.

Stop the crying, make him horny. Make your pussy happy.

Hi. Plupp, plupp, plupp.

Here I am. Yes, my name is Plupp.

Fuck, I'm sorry.

- I'm standing here outside my home. - We have a shared account.

Come here.

- The walls are made of peat and moss. - I mean...

- They're supported by branches... - Oh, God.

- ...standing in a circle. - Bluetooth, wait.

There.

Gone.

UNLISTED NUMBER

Get rid of it.

Hello?

- I'm calling from Ersta hospice. - Wait.

- I'm so sorry to have to tell you this... - Wait.

...but your mom has just passed away.

LIV: DID HE MAKE THE PUSSY HAPPY?

She wasn't exactly a great mother.

But I would have wanted to give her the chance to be a great-grandmother.

She would have wanted that.

I really want to become a dad. I've felt that way for a long time now.

You would make a great dad.

You think so?

Yes.

It feels so good to talk to you.

I feel like you really understand me.

We're a lot alike, you and me.

At times like this, you realize how short life is.

It's not always good to put stuff off.

No. Exactly.

I promised myself some time ago that I would try to find someone

who likes and understands me, to start a family with.

That's beautiful.

You're truly amazing.

You're taking this so well.

If you had been a few years younger, it would have been perfect.

- But kids is the decisive factor for me. - What?

Me and my ex did IVF for a long time. I can't go through that again.

But I hope we can keep in touch as friends.

Yes. Yeah.

Now let's move into the deep frog.

Lift your palms up, and we'll be most present.

And down. Womb to the floor.

We've just moved out of Mercury retrograde,

so this is a very good opportunity to manifest.

Beautiful, girls.

You are doing great.

Now we'll do a classic chassé.

Foot on the bar, and hands above your head.

There you go.

And then we'll bend our knee.

Why do you look so old?

He wasn't looking for a partner after all.

He just wanted a hyper-fertile uterus or something.

- I see. - I feel so goddamn stupid.

Why don't you just focus on yourself instead of these fucking dudes?

We agreed on that. We know what body part you should be listening to.

Put your phone away. We're doing an exercise.

- I have to go. - Where to?

I need to go home to see Mom. Sorry.

- Call me later. - Yes.

This week's mantra: it's not easy when it's hard, but it's nice when it's hard.

Oh, Hanna!

Hi, Mom.

Mommy is coming.

- Hi. - Hi.

- Mommy's here. - Hi, sweetie. How are you?

Fine.

- What are you guys doing here? - Eva and I were just talking.

- Hi. I'm so glad that you could make it. - Yes.

- I need to go to the bathroom. - You need to go to the bathroom?

Yes, of course.

- We'll go to the bathroom. - Okay.

I think he misses this.

Being a family.

I know that I've...

hurt you and made you sad,

but...

I needed this time to sort out my feelings,

and

I think that we should do it.

Have another baby.

And be a family.

A real family.

For real.

There you go. Let's go and sit down here again.

You sit down. I'll just get a refill.

Put all you have into it.

Come on, then!

No, not that hard! Ow, ow, ow!

He is a big, strong boy.

Should Daddy and Mommy try?

Mom is stronger.

- Really make an effort, then. - Yes.

I have some great news.

You can have your old job back.

What?

Yes.

Okay... What about Asrin?

No, I want you.

Yes.

And she's been accepted into an educational program in California too,

so there's an opening.

Okay.

But that's not the main reason. It's because you are the best.

- And you know it. - Yes.

- Yes. You can move over there today. - Yes.

That's the way it is. Great.

Hey, wait.

Sorry. Wait.

I...

I'm actually going to have to...

turn you down.

I see, and...

Is it the bastard who...?

No! I mean, no.

I'm tired of being good all the time. I mean, I wanted to be mediocre.

Like Ola, kind of.

Hand in half-assed reports and go home early

and be perfectly happy with yourself, like a guy.

But listen, I mean, you have enormous poten...

- No, I need to be able to live outside of... - I mean, this is...

- Do you want me to stay? - Yes.

Then I want to lower myself to his level.

Huh?

Well, then that's what we'll do.

- I guess we'll make it work. - Okay.

- What do you think, Ola? - Yeah, sure... Or...

I'm sorry, I meant that in a good way.

- It wasn't... - Yes.

- She meant that in a good way, obviously. - I get that.

- Exactly. - Then it's decided.

- So, can I move over there now? - Yeah, yeah.

SURROUNDED BY BAD BOSSES

THE RASPBERRY CAVE

Hanna.

- Hi. - Hi.

I just wanted to say it feels darn great that you're back.

Yes.

I mean, I do like Asrin, but she was so quick.

She had a hand cream too that was so damn strong.

I mean, I got a rash over my chin area.

It activated some old allergy rosacea.

What? Did she touch you on the chin?

No, I don't think so. I was probably...

I think it was that she used my keyboard at some point.

- And then I used it and touched my face. - Oh, dear.

But I just want to say it's great as hell, you know, with

the old team.

- Hi, Mommy. - Hi, sweetie!

Hi!

Hi. Hi, sweetie.

- Hi! - Hi.

Did you get up late?

It was just a couple of minutes.

- Let's go check out the animals. - Come, sweetie.

- Are you excited? - Yes.

Come on, let's go have a look. They have a ton of birds here.

Hi.

Look, have you seen the wolves? Eli! Look, there.

Wow.

See the arctic fox up there?

Isn't that a lynx?

- Wow, look at that. - Yeah.

It looks like you, when you get the tenth parking ticket in a week.

Listen, I...

I really want this.

But it's like...

We're ending up the same way again.

Yes, you were right.

I prioritized things wrong.

I lived according to other people's expectations and didn't listen to myself.

Is this about the dude with the baseball cap?

No, God, his mother--

Actually, it's got nothing to do with him. This is about me.

I don't know, I...

I need to be able to be who I am and...

If you can't take it, then that's okay.

Pussy first.

Okay.

- Hi. - Hi.

I just wanted to ask if you want to meet up.

Well, I don't know if I... I don't think I can.

Okay, I get it.

But maybe some other time?

No, I really don't think so, Adam. But take care.

He does not have "certain points", okay? He has no points.

He did so much drugs that he ended up in a coma, damn it.

You go, then!

Take Ebbe with you.

Stop telling me whom I should spend time with. Okay?

- Hi! - Hi!

Hi.

It's me, your worst friend. Remember me?

Damn, I missed you so much.

Shit, I'm sorry, Hanna.

I mean, I'm so sorry that I've been stuck with this dude

who thinks he is a natural wine-feminist, but is just a regular Mars and Venus guy.

Would you be willing to listen to me for a while, so that I can explain?

Yes.

About time.

Okay.

- Okay? - Yes.

I'm sorry! I'm sorry!

Shit, I didn't know what to say.

It was such a weird situation.

Let's go over there and check if we can borrow...

What?

Hooray for Hanna!

Oh my God, what's this? Are you kidding me?

Hi, darling!

Hi!

Mom!

Well, congratulations.

Boss man!

Hi!

Hi, sweetheart! Me and Carolin invited everyone for you.

- Congrats! - And a few others.

- Kissy kiss. Congratulations. - Hi.

Because you're, like, a star.

Right?

Hi!

- It might fit your head better. - Whoops!

So sexy.

Hi!

Vagus Venus.

Yes! Congratulations!

Hi.

- Hi. - You too? Hi.

No, no! No, oh my God, stop!

Why do you have tears in your eyes?

I'm so happy to be your mom, sweetie.

It worked!

She seems different.

More...

More mature.

There we are. Hashtag: Hanna40.

Absolutely.

Are you going for sexy or funny?

Sexy, or what do you think?

Hi!

Well, this is damn great... stuff.

It's important to feel well here, in these regions.

Absolutely.

We're thinking about introducing one of those pleasure pauses at the office.

Oh... Pleasure pose?

- No, not a pose, a pause. - Okay.

- A pause. - A pause.

Like a break, when you can, like...

Well, like, smoke and... Or masturbate.

Subtitle translation by: Ron Sawyer