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WWW.MY-SUBS.CO
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So what you're saying, doctor,
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00:00:02,835 --> 00:00:05,069
is that my entire life
is falling apart
3
00:00:05,103 --> 00:00:07,371
and you're still vacationing
in Brazil. .
4
00:00:07,406 --> 00:00:11,275
Why couldn't you
make it back in time? .
5
00:00:11,310 --> 00:00:12,510
So, pay the ransom. .
6
00:00:12,545 --> 00:00:15,546
No, no, no! I don't want
someone to cover for you! .
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Look, you're my therapist. .
8
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You and I
have a history together. .
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You're like a father to me. .
10
00:00:21,053 --> 00:00:22,553
Now, what are the chances
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00:00:22,588 --> 00:00:25,023
someone's gonna walk
through that door,
12
00:00:25,057 --> 00:00:27,625
and I'm gonna feel
the same connection with them? .
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Hi, I'm Dr. Peterson. .
14
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I-I'll call you back.
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All right, why don't you start
16
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by telling me
what brought you here today? .
17
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Uh, well...
18
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I've fallen in love
with this woman I work with. .
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Her name is Caitlin. .
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So, we decided
that last night,
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we were gonna have sex. .
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You know, for the first time. .
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And you had difficulty
with your penis. .
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No, no. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. .
25
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Whoa! .
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Thi is not the face
of erectile dysfunction. .
27
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Look, the point is,
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normally I have sex
with someone first,
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then I fall in love.
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I mean, I-I've never
really loved anybody
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I haven't
already had sex with... .
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You know,
with the obvious exceptions...
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my mom. .
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My dog.
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Bruce Springsteen. .
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So, you and this Caitlin person
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were planning to make love
for the first time? .
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Yeah, but come on, doc,
Caitlin and I are adults. .
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We were approaching this
like any other date. .
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Hello, Caitlin. .
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Hello... .
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Mmmichael. .
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See, I love the way
you say my name. .
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You put a "mmm"
in front of it... .
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Like I'm delicious. .
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Do you know what time it is? .
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Yes. .
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It's about half an hour since
the last time you checked in. .
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It's like being a kid
on Christmas morning. .
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That killer hour
between 6:00 and 7:00. .
51
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When all you want to do
is unwrap the presents. .
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00:03:03,216 --> 00:03:04,815
You know
what the best thing is? .
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00:03:04,850 --> 00:03:07,152
Knowing that this is
definitely gonna happen,
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00:03:07,186 --> 00:03:09,687
because you are
way too much of a man
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to ever experience
erectile dysfunction.
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Michael,
did she really say that? .
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It was implied. .
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But listen, I don't think
we should make a big scene
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by leaving together. .
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So wait five minutes
and then go.
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I'll meet you at your place. .
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Five minutes... at my place.
Got it. .
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One Mississippi,
two Mississippi,
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three Mississippi... .
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Excuse me.
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I'm looking for the most
beautiful girl in the world. .
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Oh, yeah. Like chaka Khan
would hang out here. .
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There she is!
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Tony. .
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Mmmm. .
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Tony's here!
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Tony?! Where?! .
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Hey, Tony! Hey, Tony! .
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What are you doin' here?
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I was nowhere near
the neighborhood,
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00:04:04,843 --> 00:04:06,944
so I thought I'd drop by
and give you this. .
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Ohhh, that is so sweet.
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I'll see you tonight.
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Carter, Stuart,
I'll see you guys Friday night. .
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Can't wait. You got it. .
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Hey, there, lady-killer! .
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Oh! .
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He-e-e-y, Tony.
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I like that guy.
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Tony DeMarco... so cool! .
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Oh, I'm glad you guys like him.
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Nikki, it's just so nice for us
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to finally see you dating
someone who's not so... .
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Loserly.
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I don't date losers. .
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What about that creepy guy
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that used to sweep up hair
clippings at the barber shop? .
93
00:04:43,782 --> 00:04:47,585
Okay, "a"... it was a salon,
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00:04:47,620 --> 00:04:49,620
and "b"...
I thought he worked there. .
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Besides, I used to date Mike.
He's normal.
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216 Mississippi,
217 Mississippi,
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218 Mississippi,
219 Mississippi...
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Ow! .
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Hi. .
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Hi. .
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Uh, come in. .
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Wow. .
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You did all of this for me? .
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This is the way I live, baby. .
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Ooh, doves.
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I'm impressed. .
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You, uh... .
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You like animals? .
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Yeah.
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'Cause, you know,
I also have roaches. .
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So... How was your day? .
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Honey, I...
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I don't want
to talk about my day. .
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Oh, come on. .
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That's one of the things
I find so sexy about you...
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00:06:04,930 --> 00:06:09,100
that whole "take charge,
can do" thing, mmmichael. .
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Well, I did have a meeting
with the mta. .
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Did you? .
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We... we... we raised
parking-meter rates...
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To 25 cents for 10 minutes. .
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That's expensive. .
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You know what I did? .
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I didn't tell you yet.
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I knew it was gonna be good.
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I solicited campaign donations.
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I phoned the governor. .
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Ooh! I set up a town meeting.
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00:06:47,440 --> 00:06:49,474
I fired
the park superintendent. .
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00:06:49,508 --> 00:06:52,377
You fired Eric frick? How come? .
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He was, uh, he was a year late
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on the Washington square
park renovation. .
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Well, was that his fault? .
133
00:06:58,150 --> 00:07:01,152
Well... It had to be
somebody's fault. .
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00:07:03,688 --> 00:07:06,057
What... what are you doin'?
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00:07:06,091 --> 00:07:08,759
I don't know.
I just feel bad for Eric. .
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00:07:08,794 --> 00:07:11,262
He's worked for the parks
department his whole life. .
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Now what's he gonna do? .
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D-d-don't feel bad for him,
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'cause... 'cause
I already got him a new job. .
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At the midtown park...
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ing garage. .
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And he's happy. He's so happy.
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I mean, he's a junior valet. .
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And he works right under
a big sign that says, "park... ."
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Here." .
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What are you doin'? .
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Cait... Caitlin,
don't put the blouse...
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Caitlin,
step away from the blouse
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and get those breasts out
where I can see them!
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00:07:40,492 --> 00:07:43,895
I'm sorry, Mike.
I just kind of lost the mood. .
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00:07:43,929 --> 00:07:45,195
We should just wait. .
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I-I-I can't... I can't wait.
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I only have those doves
till 10:00.
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I want it to be perfect,
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and tonight's
just not the night.
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Caitlin...
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I'm sorry, Mike.
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How was your day? .
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Good morning. .
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Ha. .
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00:08:32,010 --> 00:08:35,045
Hey, Mike, the foreman
of the new project just called. .
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00:08:35,079 --> 00:08:37,348
The construction workers
walked off the site. .
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We had an agreement with them. .
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Apparently,
there were additional issues. .
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So what you're saying is
that they... .
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Promised
they would do something... .
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00:08:46,592 --> 00:08:49,460
And at the last minute,
then just up and left. .
168
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Is there nothing
more frustrating? .
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00:08:55,067 --> 00:08:57,201
Maybe the construction workers
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wanted the building
to be perfect,
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and they thought
that starting work early
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would ruin the foundation. .
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00:09:03,475 --> 00:09:06,010
Well, the city
understands that,
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00:09:06,044 --> 00:09:09,346
but is still... Very... .
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Eager... .
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00:09:11,050 --> 00:09:13,750
To break ground. .
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00:09:13,785 --> 00:09:16,354
The construction crew
is not about to go to work
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00:09:16,388 --> 00:09:20,658
just because the city takes off
its pants and begs them to. .
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00:09:22,628 --> 00:09:25,596
This great Metropolis
does not beg. .
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00:09:25,630 --> 00:09:27,231
You know what?
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00:09:27,266 --> 00:09:29,767
I'm starting to think
maybe this construction company
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is just a little too emotional. .
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00:09:31,336 --> 00:09:34,038
It doesn't really know
wha it wants. .
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00:09:34,073 --> 00:09:37,041
Spoken just like a city! .
185
00:09:41,680 --> 00:09:44,215
I know
what that was really about. .
186
00:09:44,249 --> 00:09:46,651
We're not getting
Memorial Day off, are we?
187
00:09:49,988 --> 00:09:52,223
Mike... .
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00:09:52,257 --> 00:09:54,325
That Wayne Sheridan guy
is here again. .
189
00:09:54,359 --> 00:09:56,861
Aw, not him again. Damn! .
190
00:09:56,895 --> 00:09:59,763
Every time he comes here,
it's the same thing. .
191
00:09:59,798 --> 00:10:02,433
It's questions,
questions, questions. .
192
00:10:02,468 --> 00:10:04,635
What is wrong with that guy? .
193
00:10:04,669 --> 00:10:07,438
He's a reporter? .
194
00:10:07,472 --> 00:10:09,307
Nah, Stuart,
he's not just a reporter,
195
00:10:09,341 --> 00:10:10,641
he's my Nemesis.
196
00:10:10,676 --> 00:10:15,245
I mean, he is my Lex Luthor,
my darth vader,
197
00:10:15,314 --> 00:10:17,115
my Matt Richter. .
198
00:10:17,149 --> 00:10:18,415
Huh? .
199
00:10:18,449 --> 00:10:19,984
Sixth grade. .
200
00:10:20,018 --> 00:10:22,587
Brutal wedgies. .
201
00:10:25,624 --> 00:10:27,458
Hey, hey, Flaherty. .
202
00:10:27,493 --> 00:10:29,526
That's a nice-lookin'
fountain pen. .
203
00:10:29,561 --> 00:10:30,828
Must have been a bribe.
204
00:10:30,862 --> 00:10:32,930
I know you can't afford it.
205
00:10:32,964 --> 00:10:35,633
Wayne...
What are you doin' here? .
206
00:10:35,667 --> 00:10:38,603
Shouldn't you be off
investigating your mother
207
00:10:38,637 --> 00:10:40,304
for some sort of scandal? .
208
00:10:40,338 --> 00:10:41,639
Like what? .
209
00:10:41,673 --> 00:10:44,942
Oh, I don't know. Having you. .
210
00:10:46,878 --> 00:10:49,747
Aw, hey, hey. Come on.
Do you mind? .
211
00:10:49,781 --> 00:10:53,351
What's the matter?
You seem a little defensive. .
212
00:10:57,389 --> 00:11:00,425
I got nothin' to hide. .
213
00:11:00,459 --> 00:11:02,260
You've been trying
to pin something
214
00:11:02,294 --> 00:11:04,195
on this administration
for years. .
215
00:11:04,229 --> 00:11:08,298
When are you gonna realize
that I'm like the road runner
216
00:11:08,333 --> 00:11:12,669
and you're like
a big, stupid reporter? .
217
00:11:12,704 --> 00:11:15,907
Yeah, well, this big, stupid
reporter's next story
218
00:11:15,941 --> 00:11:19,577
is gonna focus on the mayor's
involvement in organized crime. .
219
00:11:19,611 --> 00:11:21,078
You're dreaming. .
220
00:11:21,112 --> 00:11:22,813
You know,
there's a couple of things
221
00:11:22,847 --> 00:11:24,048
I haven't done in my life...
222
00:11:24,082 --> 00:11:26,583
take down a mayor,
win a pulitzer. .
223
00:11:26,618 --> 00:11:29,120
Pleasure a woman. .
224
00:11:30,322 --> 00:11:31,622
It would be kind of nice
225
00:11:31,656 --> 00:11:34,025
to take care of both
of those things in one story. .
226
00:11:34,059 --> 00:11:36,994
Mayor connected to mobster. .
227
00:11:36,996 --> 00:11:39,663
The only mob story you could do
on this administration
228
00:11:39,697 --> 00:11:41,131
is a positive one. .
229
00:11:41,165 --> 00:11:43,067
We got them out
of fulton fish market. .
230
00:11:43,101 --> 00:11:45,369
We got them out
of the javid center. .
231
00:11:45,403 --> 00:11:46,937
We've even been thinking
232
00:11:46,971 --> 00:11:50,174
of making them film
"the sopranos" somewhere else. .
233
00:11:50,209 --> 00:11:52,643
Does the name Tony DeMarco
mean anything to you? .
234
00:11:52,678 --> 00:11:54,045
No. .
235
00:11:54,079 --> 00:11:57,014
Good, 'cause the feds have been
tryin' to nail that guy
236
00:11:57,048 --> 00:11:58,715
for racketeering charges
for years. .
237
00:11:58,750 --> 00:12:01,318
But that wouldn't concern you,
would it?
238
00:12:01,353 --> 00:12:02,853
'Cause you've never heard
of him. .
239
00:12:02,887 --> 00:12:06,958
You know,
I-I-I'll be right back. .
240
00:12:07,025 --> 00:12:10,027
Here...
look at these secret files.
241
00:12:11,363 --> 00:12:13,296
Nikki .
242
00:12:13,331 --> 00:12:15,298
Where is your boyfriend,
Tony, right now? .
243
00:12:15,333 --> 00:12:16,500
At work.
244
00:12:16,534 --> 00:12:18,735
I see,
and that wouldn't involve
245
00:12:18,770 --> 00:12:22,172
hanging outside a social club
in a warm-up suit, would it? .
246
00:12:23,842 --> 00:12:25,576
What are you talking about?
247
00:12:25,778 --> 00:12:27,745
Nikki, you're dating a mobster. .
248
00:12:27,779 --> 00:12:30,080
Not Tony. Everybody loves Tony. .
249
00:12:30,115 --> 00:12:33,184
Because everybody
who doesn't... Is dead. .
250
00:12:35,154 --> 00:12:37,488
I am never gonna get married! .
251
00:12:37,523 --> 00:12:38,722
That's it. That's it. .
252
00:12:38,757 --> 00:12:40,525
We'll play the pity card.
253
00:12:40,559 --> 00:12:43,360
I am not pitiful. .
254
00:12:44,863 --> 00:12:47,731
Well, I don't want
to go wide with it. .
255
00:12:47,766 --> 00:12:50,201
We just have to make it clear
that this is personal. .
256
00:12:50,235 --> 00:12:53,671
This is a desperate
single woman's mad scramble
257
00:12:53,705 --> 00:12:56,039
to land any man
who'll have her. .
258
00:12:56,041 --> 00:12:57,241
Hey, Mike... .
259
00:12:57,275 --> 00:12:59,276
You should probably know... .
260
00:12:59,311 --> 00:13:02,446
A while back, I fixed a couple
of parking tickets for Tony. .
261
00:13:02,481 --> 00:13:05,249
He also gave Carter and me
a tip on a horse. .
262
00:13:05,284 --> 00:13:08,552
And I got his niece
into private school,
263
00:13:08,587 --> 00:13:12,022
put a loading zone in front
of his buddy's laundromat,
264
00:13:12,056 --> 00:13:15,259
and I got him
diplomatic plates.
265
00:13:17,195 --> 00:13:18,562
Paul. .
266
00:13:18,597 --> 00:13:20,731
He calls me "lady-killer." .
267
00:13:23,134 --> 00:13:24,235
All right. .
268
00:13:24,269 --> 00:13:26,437
Well, so far,
I'm not hearing anything
269
00:13:26,471 --> 00:13:28,172
that's gonna make
the front page. .
270
00:13:28,207 --> 00:13:29,640
Oh, Mike, I made my decision. .
271
00:13:29,674 --> 00:13:33,443
We gave that waste contract
to thunderbird sanitation. .
272
00:13:35,413 --> 00:13:38,082
Hey, Nik... .
273
00:13:38,116 --> 00:13:41,051
Let me see the back of that
jacket that Tony gave you. .
274
00:13:44,423 --> 00:13:49,059
Okay, raise your hand if you
ever helped Tony bury somebody. .
275
00:13:51,663 --> 00:13:54,599
So the mayor giving
this mob guy the contract
276
00:13:54,633 --> 00:13:56,700
is a big problem? .
277
00:13:59,370 --> 00:14:01,038
No, no. .
278
00:14:01,072 --> 00:14:04,575
The mayor buying beer
for those cub scouts...
279
00:14:04,609 --> 00:14:06,744
that was a big problem. .
280
00:14:06,778 --> 00:14:10,214
This... this...
this is a catastrophe. .
281
00:14:11,049 --> 00:14:12,116
Look...
282
00:14:12,150 --> 00:14:13,818
I can't sit here
283
00:14:13,852 --> 00:14:16,686
and explain the entire
political process to you.
284
00:14:16,721 --> 00:14:18,222
Mike, are you angry at me
285
00:14:18,256 --> 00:14:21,791
or are you angry at your penis? .
286
00:14:23,594 --> 00:14:26,397
Is that the only class you took
at shrink school? .
287
00:14:28,733 --> 00:14:31,402
Uh, sir, we need to speak. .
288
00:14:31,436 --> 00:14:34,304
When you awarded that contract
to thunderbird sanitation,
289
00:14:34,338 --> 00:14:35,839
what criteria did you use? .
290
00:14:35,873 --> 00:14:39,777
Well, I used a nonbiased,
blind comparison
291
00:14:39,811 --> 00:14:41,512
of the cost benefits of the...
292
00:14:41,546 --> 00:14:44,014
Mike, please. We're talking
about garbage here.
293
00:14:44,048 --> 00:14:45,916
I picked the one
with the cool logo. .
294
00:14:45,950 --> 00:14:48,618
So, you... you didn't meet
295
00:14:48,653 --> 00:14:50,854
with any
of the company's executives? .
296
00:14:50,888 --> 00:14:52,056
Absolutely not.
297
00:14:52,090 --> 00:14:53,824
I think we can
keep you clear of this. .
298
00:14:53,858 --> 00:14:54,858
Clear of what? .
299
00:14:54,892 --> 00:14:56,727
Clear of nothing.
300
00:15:11,510 --> 00:15:13,510
Sir, who are you with
in this picture? .
301
00:15:13,545 --> 00:15:15,746
Oh, that's Nikki's boyfriend. .
302
00:15:15,780 --> 00:15:17,881
We went on a fishing trip
together. .
303
00:15:19,150 --> 00:15:21,084
This is Tony DeMarco. .
304
00:15:21,119 --> 00:15:24,888
He's the president
of thunderbird sanitation. .
305
00:15:24,923 --> 00:15:27,124
He's a known mobster.
306
00:15:27,159 --> 00:15:28,592
I thought it was odd
307
00:15:28,626 --> 00:15:31,461
when he said,
"let's go whack some fish." .
308
00:15:39,037 --> 00:15:40,571
Hey, Caitlin. .
309
00:15:40,605 --> 00:15:42,906
Listen, Mike,
I've been thinking. .
310
00:15:42,941 --> 00:15:45,876
About last night,
I overreacted. .
311
00:15:45,910 --> 00:15:49,046
Don't worry about that.
We got bigger problems. .
312
00:15:49,081 --> 00:15:52,282
Ooh. Is it political?
313
00:15:53,585 --> 00:15:56,486
Wayne Sheridan...
314
00:15:56,520 --> 00:15:58,622
he's got the mayor
linked to organized crime. .
315
00:15:58,690 --> 00:15:59,823
What? .
316
00:15:59,857 --> 00:16:01,959
Nikki's boyfriend. .
317
00:16:01,993 --> 00:16:03,026
Is it real? .
318
00:16:03,061 --> 00:16:04,294
Yeah, it's real. .
319
00:16:04,329 --> 00:16:05,663
Can we bury it? .
320
00:16:05,697 --> 00:16:07,631
No, not with this reporter,
321
00:16:07,666 --> 00:16:09,500
'cause he's got it in
for the mayor. .
322
00:16:09,534 --> 00:16:11,135
So, we'll go after him. .
323
00:16:11,169 --> 00:16:13,837
He's clean. He's a pro.
There's nothin' there. .
324
00:16:13,872 --> 00:16:15,806
What's the fix?
325
00:16:19,177 --> 00:16:21,344
Oh. No, Mike. .
326
00:16:21,379 --> 00:16:23,113
Come on.
These are your friends. .
327
00:16:23,147 --> 00:16:26,851
You think I don't know that? .
328
00:16:26,885 --> 00:16:28,919
What choice do I have?
329
00:16:28,953 --> 00:16:30,287
I don't get it. .
330
00:16:30,321 --> 00:16:32,889
Look, doc... .
331
00:16:32,924 --> 00:16:35,092
It's politics 101. .
332
00:16:35,126 --> 00:16:37,160
If your guy's in trouble,
333
00:16:37,195 --> 00:16:38,996
someone's gotta jump
on the grenade. .
334
00:16:39,030 --> 00:16:40,263
What if no one jumps? .
335
00:16:40,298 --> 00:16:42,766
Well, then,
someone's gotta get pushed.
336
00:16:42,800 --> 00:16:46,102
I'd go with that Paul guy. .
337
00:16:46,137 --> 00:16:49,840
Look, I-I'm not here
338
00:16:49,874 --> 00:16:52,609
to find out which one
of my staff to sacrifice. .
339
00:16:52,644 --> 00:16:54,712
You just want me
to tell you it's okay. .
340
00:16:54,746 --> 00:16:56,146
Yes! Please!
341
00:16:56,180 --> 00:16:58,215
I got 15 minutes
before the press conference. .
342
00:16:58,249 --> 00:17:00,617
If I tell you to do something
questionable in your job,
343
00:17:00,652 --> 00:17:03,020
then I'd be doing something
questionable in my job.
344
00:17:03,054 --> 00:17:04,889
I just want you
to tell me it's okay. .
345
00:17:04,923 --> 00:17:07,925
Just say the words,
"it's okay." .
346
00:17:07,959 --> 00:17:10,193
Not unless
it's for the right reasons. .
347
00:17:11,062 --> 00:17:13,130
Doc...
348
00:17:13,164 --> 00:17:16,667
I'm really angry at my penis. .
349
00:17:18,970 --> 00:17:21,705
It's okay. .
350
00:17:21,739 --> 00:17:23,774
Thank you, doc! .
351
00:17:23,808 --> 00:17:25,075
Oh, Mike? .
352
00:17:25,109 --> 00:17:26,910
Pay mallory on your way out. .
353
00:17:32,083 --> 00:17:33,617
This is it. .
354
00:17:33,652 --> 00:17:36,987
One of us is goin' down.
355
00:17:37,022 --> 00:17:38,588
I'm really nervous.
356
00:17:38,623 --> 00:17:39,957
James, don't be. .
357
00:17:39,991 --> 00:17:42,793
At one time or another,
every great political figure
358
00:17:42,827 --> 00:17:44,928
has been sacrificed
for the greater good. .
359
00:17:44,962 --> 00:17:47,097
So you'd be okay
if it were you? .
360
00:17:47,132 --> 00:17:48,932
Hell, no. I need my j-o-b. .
361
00:17:53,471 --> 00:17:54,638
I should be the one to go. .
362
00:17:54,672 --> 00:17:56,574
This whole thing
is basically my fault. .
363
00:17:56,608 --> 00:18:00,110
Basically? Try "totally."
364
00:18:00,144 --> 00:18:03,179
I'll take you down with me. .
365
00:18:03,214 --> 00:18:04,214
It's me.
366
00:18:04,249 --> 00:18:05,749
I'm out. .
367
00:18:05,784 --> 00:18:09,219
And I just blew all that money
on groceries.
368
00:18:17,028 --> 00:18:18,062
Good afternoon.
369
00:18:18,096 --> 00:18:19,729
I have a brief statement
to make. .
370
00:18:19,764 --> 00:18:24,201
The allegations against
the mayor are ridiculous. .
371
00:18:24,235 --> 00:18:25,802
If there has been
372
00:18:25,836 --> 00:18:29,072
any wrongdoing
in this administration,
373
00:18:29,106 --> 00:18:31,875
there's only one person
who's at fault. .
374
00:18:36,981 --> 00:18:38,882
And that person...
375
00:18:41,286 --> 00:18:42,486
is me.
376
00:18:45,823 --> 00:18:50,294
I awarded Tony DeMarco
that city contract.
377
00:18:50,328 --> 00:18:53,797
I authorized
all favors done for him. .
378
00:18:53,831 --> 00:18:57,634
So I, alone,
am totally responsible. .
379
00:18:59,270 --> 00:19:01,305
I have no further comment
at this time. .
380
00:19:01,339 --> 00:19:04,040
If you have any questions
about regular city business,
381
00:19:04,074 --> 00:19:06,977
Paul lassiter will be happy
to answer them. Thank you.
382
00:19:12,683 --> 00:19:15,586
Deputy mayor, Michael Flaherty,
took the blame today