All language subtitles for Friends.S09E10.1080p.5.1Ch.BluRay.ReEnc-DeeJayAhmed

af Afrikaans
sq Albanian Download
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bn Bengali
bs Bosnian
bg Bulgarian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French Download
fy Frisian
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
km Khmer
ko Korean
ku Kurdish (Kurmanji)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Lao
la Latin
lv Latvian
lt Lithuanian
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
ne Nepali
no Norwegian
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt Portuguese
pa Punjabi
ro Romanian
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
st Sesotho
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhala
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
te Telugu
th Thai
tr Turkish
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
or Odia (Oriya)
rw Kinyarwanda
tk Turkmen
tt Tatar
ug Uyghur
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,212 --> 00:00:06,797 PHOEBE: He sprang to his sleigh To his team gave a whistle 2 00:00:06,965 --> 00:00:09,967 And away they all flew Like the down of a thistle 3 00:00:10,135 --> 00:00:13,262 But I heard him exclaim Ere he drove out of sight 4 00:00:13,430 --> 00:00:18,892 "Merry Christmas to all And to all a good night." 5 00:00:20,770 --> 00:00:24,815 - Wow. That was great. - Mm-hm. 6 00:00:24,983 --> 00:00:26,066 You really wrote that? 7 00:00:27,444 --> 00:00:28,944 Uh-huh. 8 00:00:29,154 --> 00:00:31,989 - Say goodbye, elves. I'm off to Tulsa. ALL: Aw. 9 00:00:32,157 --> 00:00:34,491 I can't believe you're not gonna be here for Christmas. 10 00:00:34,659 --> 00:00:36,493 You're really not coming back? 11 00:00:36,661 --> 00:00:39,830 Yeah, we have this paperwork that needs to be filed by the end of the year. 12 00:00:40,040 --> 00:00:42,708 - If I don't get it done, I'll be fired. - It's so unfair. 13 00:00:42,876 --> 00:00:45,919 - You don't even like your job. - So? Who does? 14 00:00:46,129 --> 00:00:47,588 - I like my job. - I love my job. 15 00:00:47,756 --> 00:00:50,841 - I can't wait to go back to work. - I can't get enough dinosaurs. 16 00:00:55,263 --> 00:00:57,347 I'm sorry I won't be here. 17 00:00:57,640 --> 00:01:00,309 It's just hard enough not seeing you during the week... 18 00:01:00,477 --> 00:01:02,436 ...but for Christmas... 19 00:01:02,604 --> 00:01:04,772 If this is what you have to do, I understand. 20 00:01:05,273 --> 00:01:07,316 Thanks. 21 00:01:07,484 --> 00:01:08,734 I'll see you New Year's Day. 22 00:01:09,110 --> 00:01:11,070 You're not gonna be here New Year's Eve? 23 00:01:11,905 --> 00:01:15,324 - Did I not mention that? - No. 24 00:01:15,617 --> 00:01:17,701 And to all a good night. 25 00:02:12,298 --> 00:02:15,467 All right, everybody. I know that it is Christmas Eve... 26 00:02:15,635 --> 00:02:19,012 ...and you'd rather be with your families, but there is no call for writing: 27 00:02:19,180 --> 00:02:23,809 "Screw you, Mr. Bing" on the back of my chair. 28 00:02:24,185 --> 00:02:26,353 By the way, you can all call me Chandler. 29 00:02:27,647 --> 00:02:29,815 - Hey. - Hey. Where you been? 30 00:02:29,983 --> 00:02:33,318 I was, uh, checking out that insurance company's Christmas party on three. 31 00:02:33,486 --> 00:02:36,738 It was really beautiful. They have all these decorations and this huge tree. 32 00:02:36,906 --> 00:02:39,908 And I just thought, to hell with them, we have to work. 33 00:02:40,076 --> 00:02:42,661 So I stole their ham. 34 00:02:43,997 --> 00:02:46,123 You hear that? You may not be with your families... 35 00:02:46,291 --> 00:02:48,917 ...but at least it's gonna smell like ham in here. 36 00:02:50,211 --> 00:02:52,254 My kid's in a play right now. 37 00:02:53,173 --> 00:02:55,465 You know what? I know what will cheer you guys up. 38 00:02:55,633 --> 00:02:57,759 I had a talk with the boys in New York. 39 00:02:57,927 --> 00:03:00,095 I told them about all the hard work you've been doing... 40 00:03:00,263 --> 00:03:03,098 ...and that a little Christmas bonus may be in order. 41 00:03:03,308 --> 00:03:08,729 "A donation has been made in your name to the New York City Ballet." 42 00:03:11,149 --> 00:03:12,691 Well, that's like money in your pocket. 43 00:03:14,444 --> 00:03:16,695 All right, look, you want me to say it? This sucks. 44 00:03:16,905 --> 00:03:19,281 Being here sucks. This work sucks. 45 00:03:19,490 --> 00:03:21,783 Now it feels like Christmas. 46 00:03:22,452 --> 00:03:24,119 I'm sorry. 47 00:03:24,287 --> 00:03:27,247 Hey, at least you get to go home and be with your families tonight. 48 00:03:27,415 --> 00:03:29,958 I have to back to an empty hotel room and lay down... 49 00:03:30,126 --> 00:03:33,253 ...on a very questionable bedspread. 50 00:03:34,047 --> 00:03:37,049 Then tomorrow morning, you get to have Christmas morning in your own houses. 51 00:03:37,217 --> 00:03:39,635 Which, by the way, none of you have invited me to. 52 00:03:39,844 --> 00:03:44,097 - You can come to my house. - Ha, ha. No, thanks. 53 00:03:45,975 --> 00:03:47,684 - It was a nice pep talk. - Oh, thanks. 54 00:03:47,894 --> 00:03:51,313 I'm actually thinking about becoming a motivational speaker. 55 00:03:52,273 --> 00:03:56,151 So if you were home right now, what would you be doing? 56 00:03:56,361 --> 00:04:00,656 Typical Christmassy stuff, you know. Our holidays are pretty traditional. 57 00:04:00,823 --> 00:04:03,742 So here's a very special holiday song... 58 00:04:03,910 --> 00:04:07,537 ...that I wrote for some very important people to me. 59 00:04:10,708 --> 00:04:14,670 [SINGING] Went to the store, sat on Santa's lap 60 00:04:14,837 --> 00:04:17,881 Asked him to bring my friends All kinds of crap 61 00:04:19,467 --> 00:04:22,844 Said all you need Is to write them a song 62 00:04:23,012 --> 00:04:27,474 They haven't heard it yet So don't try to sing along 63 00:04:27,642 --> 00:04:30,143 No don't sing along 64 00:04:30,895 --> 00:04:36,775 Monica, Monica Have a happy Hanukkah 65 00:04:38,611 --> 00:04:44,658 Saw Santa Claus He said hello to Ross 66 00:04:45,326 --> 00:04:51,999 And please tell Joey Christmas will be snowy 67 00:04:54,002 --> 00:04:56,837 And Rachel and Chandler 68 00:04:57,005 --> 00:04:59,715 [SINGS GIBBERISH] 69 00:05:02,093 --> 00:05:04,303 Happy holidays, everybody. 70 00:05:05,221 --> 00:05:07,764 Okay, Pheebs, look in the kitchen. I'll look in the back closet. 71 00:05:07,932 --> 00:05:11,393 I can save you time, ladies. I'm right here. 72 00:05:11,894 --> 00:05:14,104 Yeah. Chandler, why don't you take a walk? 73 00:05:14,272 --> 00:05:16,231 This doesn't concern you. 74 00:05:17,108 --> 00:05:19,651 We are looking for our Christmas presents from Monica. 75 00:05:19,819 --> 00:05:23,196 CHANDLER: What? That's terrible. - No, no. We do it every year. 76 00:05:23,406 --> 00:05:25,866 Oh, well, that makes it not terrible. 77 00:05:27,076 --> 00:05:31,496 No. Yeah, we never find them. She's always bested us, that wily... 78 00:05:31,664 --> 00:05:32,998 ...minx. 79 00:05:33,875 --> 00:05:35,876 Don't worry. We're gonna search here for an hour... 80 00:05:36,044 --> 00:05:38,170 ...and then we're gonna go to Joey's and search. Okay? 81 00:05:38,338 --> 00:05:41,131 No, not okay. You can't look for Monica's presents. 82 00:05:41,299 --> 00:05:43,175 - No, we have to. - No, you don't have to. 83 00:05:43,343 --> 00:05:47,304 And you can't, because I live here too. 84 00:05:47,555 --> 00:05:51,975 - Well, then you should look with us. - Why? 85 00:05:52,143 --> 00:05:55,145 Chandler, aren't you worried about what to get Monica for Christmas? 86 00:05:55,355 --> 00:05:57,564 No, I have a great idea for a present for her. 87 00:05:57,774 --> 00:06:00,817 Oh, pfft. That's it? A great idea again? 88 00:06:01,652 --> 00:06:04,404 Chandler, that's not enough. What if she gets you a great present... 89 00:06:04,572 --> 00:06:06,740 ...two medium presents and a bunch of little presents... 90 00:06:06,908 --> 00:06:10,160 ...and you got her one great present? That's just gonna make her feel bad. 91 00:06:10,328 --> 00:06:13,121 Why would you do that to her, Chandler? Why? Why? 92 00:06:14,832 --> 00:06:17,250 - If I helped, we could find them faster. - That's right. 93 00:06:18,878 --> 00:06:22,506 - Ooh, ooh, we have a live one. - It's a Macy's bag. 94 00:06:22,673 --> 00:06:23,965 Yeah. 95 00:06:24,133 --> 00:06:27,928 - Oh. - Ooh. Who's it for? 96 00:06:28,888 --> 00:06:33,266 "Dear Losers: Do you really think I'd hide presents under the couch? 97 00:06:34,811 --> 00:06:37,312 P.S. Chandler, I knew they'd break you." 98 00:06:40,191 --> 00:06:42,442 Rach, these are for you. 99 00:06:43,111 --> 00:06:47,364 Wiper blades. I don't even have a car. 100 00:06:47,573 --> 00:06:51,701 No, but with this new car smell, you'll think you do. 101 00:06:54,414 --> 00:06:57,499 Okay, Pheebs, your turn. 102 00:06:59,085 --> 00:07:02,462 Ah. Toilet seat covers. 103 00:07:05,591 --> 00:07:08,218 Is that what you were doing while I was getting gas? 104 00:07:08,428 --> 00:07:10,887 You guys. 105 00:07:11,055 --> 00:07:15,434 And for Ross, Mr. Sweet Tooth. 106 00:07:18,020 --> 00:07:23,150 - You got me a cola drink? - And... a lemon-lime. 107 00:07:23,943 --> 00:07:27,028 Wow. Well, this... This is too much. 108 00:07:27,196 --> 00:07:30,073 I feel like I should get you another sweater. 109 00:07:32,076 --> 00:07:35,036 And last, but not least... 110 00:07:36,873 --> 00:07:39,583 They're ribbed, for your pleasure. 111 00:07:40,918 --> 00:07:42,878 Well, hey, Ben. 112 00:07:43,045 --> 00:07:49,259 What if the Holiday Armadillo told you all about the Festival of Lights? 113 00:07:49,469 --> 00:07:50,969 Cool. 114 00:07:51,179 --> 00:07:52,888 MONICA: Come on, Ben. 115 00:07:55,558 --> 00:08:02,105 Years and years ago, there were these people called the Maccabees. 116 00:08:02,273 --> 00:08:06,109 Ho, ho, ho! Merry Christmas. 117 00:08:07,653 --> 00:08:10,197 BEN: Santa. - Hey. 118 00:08:10,907 --> 00:08:14,034 What are you doing here, Santa? 119 00:08:15,912 --> 00:08:18,788 Well, I'm here to see my old buddy Ben. 120 00:08:19,207 --> 00:08:21,208 What are you doing here... 121 00:08:21,375 --> 00:08:25,170 ...weird turtle-man? 122 00:08:26,797 --> 00:08:33,470 I'm the Holiday Armadillo, your part-Jewish friend. 123 00:08:34,805 --> 00:08:38,558 You sent me here to give Ben some presents. 124 00:08:38,726 --> 00:08:41,019 Remember? 125 00:08:42,271 --> 00:08:44,356 What? 126 00:08:44,774 --> 00:08:46,733 Okay, Ben, why don't you open some more presents? 127 00:08:46,943 --> 00:08:49,653 Santa, the armadillo and I will have a talk in the kitchen. 128 00:08:50,112 --> 00:08:53,657 There's a sentence I never thought I'd say. 129 00:08:54,617 --> 00:08:56,159 What are you doing? 130 00:08:56,369 --> 00:08:59,496 You called everyone and said you had trouble finding a Santa costume... 131 00:08:59,664 --> 00:09:02,290 ...so I borrowed one from a guy at work. 132 00:09:02,500 --> 00:09:05,001 Thank you, but you gotta leave. 133 00:09:05,211 --> 00:09:06,670 - Why? - Because... 134 00:09:06,879 --> 00:09:09,589 ...I'm finally getting him excited about Hanukkah. 135 00:09:09,757 --> 00:09:11,258 And you're wrecking it. 136 00:09:11,467 --> 00:09:15,512 But I didn't get to shake my belly like a bowl full of jelly. 137 00:09:18,641 --> 00:09:22,477 I'm sorry, Chandler, but this is really important to me. 138 00:09:22,895 --> 00:09:26,856 Okay, fine. I'll give the suit back. 139 00:09:27,024 --> 00:09:31,361 Hey, you think you can keep it another night? 140 00:09:33,114 --> 00:09:35,156 Santa? Really? 141 00:09:35,658 --> 00:09:40,996 - Yeah, is that okay? - Did your dad ever dress up like Santa? 142 00:09:41,998 --> 00:09:46,126 - No. - Then it's okay. 143 00:09:48,296 --> 00:09:50,505 You know what, everybody? 144 00:09:50,673 --> 00:09:52,882 Go home. You should be with your families. 145 00:09:53,092 --> 00:09:55,302 It's bad enough that we're working New Year's Eve. 146 00:09:57,805 --> 00:10:01,182 Did I not tell anyone about New Year's Eve? 147 00:10:01,350 --> 00:10:05,395 All right, look, go. Go home, okay? Merry Christmas. Go. 148 00:10:05,563 --> 00:10:07,981 ALL: Merry Christmas. CHANDLER: Peace on earth. 149 00:10:08,149 --> 00:10:12,861 ALL: Bye. - Good. Godspeed, good people. 150 00:10:13,571 --> 00:10:17,741 - You're not gonna go? - Nah. I couldn't leave you alone. 151 00:10:17,908 --> 00:10:20,201 Oh. Thanks. 152 00:10:20,620 --> 00:10:24,414 Besides, I can't leave until that Christmas party downstairs clears out. 153 00:10:24,582 --> 00:10:27,876 There are some pissed-off insurance people looking for that ham. 154 00:10:28,085 --> 00:10:29,252 Ah. 155 00:10:29,420 --> 00:10:30,837 [PHONE RINGS] 156 00:10:31,756 --> 00:10:34,090 - Chandler Bing. - Hi, honey. We're all here. 157 00:10:34,258 --> 00:10:36,051 We just want to wish you a Merry Christmas. 158 00:10:36,260 --> 00:10:37,761 ALL: Merry Christmas. 159 00:10:37,928 --> 00:10:39,971 [PHOEBE SPEAKS GIBBERISH] 160 00:10:40,598 --> 00:10:43,266 Aw, merry Christmas. I miss you guys. 161 00:10:43,476 --> 00:10:46,061 So is it horrible? Is everybody working really hard? 162 00:10:46,312 --> 00:10:49,105 Uh, well, no, it's just, uh, me and Wendy. 163 00:10:49,357 --> 00:10:52,025 Wendy? That sounds like a girl's name. 164 00:10:52,902 --> 00:10:55,403 It is. Did I not tell you about her? 165 00:10:55,571 --> 00:10:59,366 Mm-hm. About the time you told me about New Year's Eve. 166 00:10:59,575 --> 00:11:02,661 - Where's everybody else? CHANDLER: I sent them home. 167 00:11:02,828 --> 00:11:06,623 Oh, you are such a good boss. Is she pretty? 168 00:11:07,833 --> 00:11:11,544 - Uh... Uh... - Answer faster. Answer faster. 169 00:11:11,754 --> 00:11:14,589 - I don't know. - Answer better. Answer better. 170 00:11:15,675 --> 00:11:18,718 I don't think of her that way. I mean, she's a, uh, colleague. 171 00:11:18,928 --> 00:11:21,971 - What does she do there? - Oh, she's regional vice president. 172 00:11:22,139 --> 00:11:24,641 - She's just below me. - She did what? 173 00:11:28,688 --> 00:11:32,065 Below me. 174 00:11:33,150 --> 00:11:35,819 Oh, wait, is Wendy the runner-up Miss Oklahoma? 175 00:11:35,986 --> 00:11:37,654 What? 176 00:11:38,989 --> 00:11:41,157 Well, she didn't win. 177 00:11:42,535 --> 00:11:44,327 All right, well, maybe I should let you... 178 00:11:44,537 --> 00:11:47,497 ...and the second-prettiest girl in Oklahoma get back to work. 179 00:11:47,707 --> 00:11:49,040 Well, second prettiest that year. 180 00:11:49,208 --> 00:11:51,710 Of all the girls in Oklahoma, she's probably... 181 00:11:51,919 --> 00:11:53,378 Chandler, stop talking. 182 00:11:55,464 --> 00:11:58,091 Honey, there's really nothing to worry about. 183 00:11:58,300 --> 00:12:00,552 - Okay. - I'm serious. 184 00:12:00,761 --> 00:12:02,011 Okay. 185 00:12:02,304 --> 00:12:05,014 - Merry Christmas. - Merry Christmas. 186 00:12:05,182 --> 00:12:07,892 - Merry Christmas, you guys. ALL: Merry Christmas. 187 00:12:08,060 --> 00:12:09,185 [PHOEBE SPEAKS GIBBERISH] 188 00:12:14,567 --> 00:12:18,069 - The wife says hi. - Ah. Fun conversation? 189 00:12:18,279 --> 00:12:21,322 Ah, well, she's just got this weird idea that, uh... 190 00:12:21,490 --> 00:12:23,867 ...just because you and I are alone something's gonna happen. 191 00:12:24,243 --> 00:12:26,745 Huh? Really? 192 00:12:26,912 --> 00:12:30,540 Hmm. Would that be so terrible? 193 00:12:32,501 --> 00:12:35,587 This is probably the wrong thing to be worrying about... 194 00:12:35,755 --> 00:12:39,591 ...but you're getting ham on my only tie. 195 00:12:46,265 --> 00:12:49,809 - Whoa, back off, missy. - Ha, ha. Missy? 196 00:12:50,019 --> 00:12:52,645 I don't know. I'm not used to girls making passes at me. 197 00:12:52,813 --> 00:12:56,858 Wait a minute. Am I sexy in Oklahoma? 198 00:12:57,818 --> 00:13:02,405 - You are to me. - No. No. No. 199 00:13:03,407 --> 00:13:06,993 - Look, I'm married. - So? I'm married. 200 00:13:07,203 --> 00:13:09,078 I'm happily married. 201 00:13:09,330 --> 00:13:11,873 Oh. What's that like? 202 00:13:13,000 --> 00:13:17,212 - Right. So I'm sorry, but... - Seriously? Happily married? 203 00:13:17,379 --> 00:13:20,507 So that phone call before, that was happy? 204 00:13:20,716 --> 00:13:23,927 Well, look, it's not easy to spend this much time apart. 205 00:13:24,136 --> 00:13:26,346 She's entitled to be a little paranoid. 206 00:13:26,514 --> 00:13:29,182 Or, in this case, right on the money. 207 00:13:30,309 --> 00:13:34,771 You know, she's amazing and beautiful and smart. 208 00:13:34,939 --> 00:13:38,566 And if she were here right now, she'd kick your ass. 209 00:13:41,153 --> 00:13:46,574 Look, you're a really nice person, ham stealing and adultery aside. 210 00:13:48,452 --> 00:13:51,246 But what I have with my wife is pretty great. 211 00:13:51,413 --> 00:13:54,457 So nothing's ever gonna happen between us. 212 00:13:55,000 --> 00:13:57,252 Okay, let me ask you something. 213 00:13:57,419 --> 00:14:01,005 If what you and your wife have is so great... 214 00:14:01,173 --> 00:14:04,425 ...then why are you spending Christmas with me? 215 00:14:05,845 --> 00:14:08,429 You were the most beautiful woman in the room tonight. 216 00:14:09,640 --> 00:14:11,015 - Really? - Are you kidding? 217 00:14:11,183 --> 00:14:14,185 You're the most beautiful woman in most rooms. 218 00:14:21,986 --> 00:14:24,612 Whoa, whoa, whoa. What's going on? You and I just made out. 219 00:14:24,780 --> 00:14:27,240 - You and I are making out? - Well, not anymore. 220 00:14:27,992 --> 00:14:31,828 - But we don't do that. - I know. I just thought it would be fun. 221 00:14:32,955 --> 00:14:35,999 - How drunk are you? - Drunk enough that I know I wanna do this. 222 00:14:36,166 --> 00:14:39,419 Not so drunk that you should feel guilty about taking advantage. 223 00:14:41,171 --> 00:14:43,214 That's a perfect amount. 224 00:14:49,555 --> 00:14:51,347 - You know what's weird? - What? 225 00:14:51,557 --> 00:14:53,933 - This doesn't feel weird. - I know. 226 00:14:54,101 --> 00:14:59,314 - You're a really good kisser. - Well, I have kissed over four women. 227 00:15:00,733 --> 00:15:02,400 - You wanna get under the covers? - Uh-huh. 228 00:15:02,568 --> 00:15:04,110 Okay. 229 00:15:13,037 --> 00:15:14,662 Wow, you are really fast. 230 00:15:14,872 --> 00:15:18,041 It bodes well for me that speed impresses you. 231 00:15:19,418 --> 00:15:22,503 - We're gonna see each other naked. - Yep. 232 00:15:22,671 --> 00:15:25,340 - You want to do it at the same time? - Count of three? 233 00:15:25,507 --> 00:15:27,008 - One. - Two. 234 00:15:27,176 --> 00:15:29,260 Three. 235 00:15:33,140 --> 00:15:37,185 Well, I think it's safe to say that our friendship is effectively ruined. 236 00:15:37,394 --> 00:15:40,021 Eh, we weren't that close anyway. 237 00:15:41,982 --> 00:15:44,400 So are you really gonna go out with that nurse-man? 238 00:15:45,778 --> 00:15:47,820 Well, uh, you and I are just goofing around. 239 00:15:47,988 --> 00:15:51,616 I thought, why not just goof around with him? 240 00:15:53,702 --> 00:15:57,956 I don't know if you've ever looked up the term "goofing around" in the dictionary. 241 00:15:58,123 --> 00:16:00,416 Well, I have. 242 00:16:00,626 --> 00:16:05,588 And the technical definition is two friends... 243 00:16:05,756 --> 00:16:12,053 ...who care a lot about each other and have amazing sex... 244 00:16:14,515 --> 00:16:18,810 ...and just want to spend more time together. 245 00:16:18,978 --> 00:16:22,146 But if you have this newfangled dictionary that gets you mad at me... 246 00:16:22,314 --> 00:16:26,025 ...then we have to, you know, get you my original dictionary. 247 00:16:28,821 --> 00:16:30,571 I am so bad at this. 248 00:16:31,490 --> 00:16:33,783 I think you're better than you think you are. 249 00:16:33,993 --> 00:16:37,787 - Really? Okay. So if...? - Know when to stop. 250 00:16:37,997 --> 00:16:40,039 You know, I sensed that I should stop. 251 00:16:41,083 --> 00:16:43,292 - So we're okay? - Yeah. 252 00:16:46,755 --> 00:16:49,465 - Don't do the dance. - Right. 253 00:16:51,093 --> 00:16:53,428 I can't get married without something old, something new... 254 00:16:53,595 --> 00:16:56,389 ...something borrowed, something blue. - Okay, okay. 255 00:16:56,598 --> 00:16:58,891 Here's something blue and new. 256 00:16:59,101 --> 00:17:01,602 You are so efficient. I love you. 257 00:17:01,937 --> 00:17:03,146 - Let's go. - No, no, wait. 258 00:17:03,313 --> 00:17:05,023 We need something old. 259 00:17:05,232 --> 00:17:09,444 Okay. I have a condom in my wallet that I've had since I was 12. 260 00:17:10,821 --> 00:17:12,488 That'll work. 261 00:17:12,656 --> 00:17:14,490 I don't think so. 262 00:17:15,242 --> 00:17:17,160 Okay. Now we just need something borrowed. 263 00:17:18,829 --> 00:17:22,623 - Here, just take this. - That's stealing. 264 00:17:22,833 --> 00:17:25,376 We'll bring it back. Just put it under your dress. 265 00:17:32,634 --> 00:17:34,677 Aw. 266 00:17:36,889 --> 00:17:39,015 Okay, one thing at a time. 267 00:17:41,310 --> 00:17:43,144 Listen, um... 268 00:17:44,438 --> 00:17:46,731 ...I've been thinking. 269 00:17:47,357 --> 00:17:51,152 It's not fair for me to ask you to spend all of your money on our wedding. 270 00:17:51,320 --> 00:17:54,405 I mean, you work... You work really hard for that. 271 00:17:54,615 --> 00:17:56,824 - Well... - Well, you work for that. 272 00:17:58,744 --> 00:18:01,454 Look, I've thought about it too. And... 273 00:18:01,622 --> 00:18:06,250 ...I'm sorry. I think we should spend all of the money on the wedding. 274 00:18:07,169 --> 00:18:11,172 - You do? - Yeah. I'm putting my foot down. 275 00:18:12,883 --> 00:18:15,009 Yeah, look, when I proposed... 276 00:18:15,177 --> 00:18:19,305 ...I told you that I would do anything to make you happy. 277 00:18:19,473 --> 00:18:23,142 And if having the perfect wedding makes you happy, then... 278 00:18:23,310 --> 00:18:25,269 Then that's what we're gonna do. 279 00:18:25,854 --> 00:18:28,314 You are so sweet. 280 00:18:30,734 --> 00:18:35,113 But wait. What about our...? What about the future and stuff? 281 00:18:35,322 --> 00:18:39,075 Ah, forget about the future and stuff. So we only have two kids. 282 00:18:39,243 --> 00:18:43,412 You know, we'll pick our favorite, and that one will get to go to college. 283 00:18:44,623 --> 00:18:46,874 - You've thought about that? - Yeah. 284 00:18:47,042 --> 00:18:51,087 - How many kids were we gonna have? - Uh, four. A boy, twin girls... 285 00:18:51,255 --> 00:18:52,713 ...and another boy. 286 00:18:54,466 --> 00:18:57,260 - What else did you think about? - Well, heh... 287 00:18:57,427 --> 00:19:01,097 ...stuff like where we'd live, you know. 288 00:19:01,306 --> 00:19:05,768 Like a small place outside the city where our kids could ride their bikes and stuff. 289 00:19:05,936 --> 00:19:09,605 You know, we could have a cat that had a bell on its collar... 290 00:19:09,773 --> 00:19:13,651 ...and we could hear it every time it ran through the little kitty door. 291 00:19:13,819 --> 00:19:18,114 Of course we'd have an apartment over the garage where Joey could grow old. 292 00:19:23,412 --> 00:19:25,246 You know what? 293 00:19:25,789 --> 00:19:28,708 I don't... I don't want a big, fancy wedding. 294 00:19:29,209 --> 00:19:31,377 - Sure you do. - No. 295 00:19:32,671 --> 00:19:35,381 I want everything that you've just said. 296 00:19:35,549 --> 00:19:38,009 I want a marriage. 297 00:19:38,510 --> 00:19:40,761 - You sure? - Mm-hm. 298 00:19:42,598 --> 00:19:46,726 - I love you so much. - I love you. 299 00:19:59,156 --> 00:20:05,119 - Ah! Oh, I love it. - Really? You're not gonna return it? 300 00:20:05,329 --> 00:20:06,787 Well, not this second. 301 00:20:09,625 --> 00:20:12,043 Hey, look, you guys. It's snowing. 302 00:20:12,252 --> 00:20:14,003 RACHEL: Oh. 303 00:20:15,214 --> 00:20:20,468 - Oh, wow, it's so beautiful. - Wow, it really is. 304 00:20:20,636 --> 00:20:22,220 RACHEL: Ah. 305 00:20:23,013 --> 00:20:26,098 Wendy's a fat-girl name. 306 00:20:26,266 --> 00:20:28,768 PHOEBE: Aren't we done with that? 307 00:20:28,936 --> 00:20:33,022 Okay, fine. Fine. Let's talk about snow. 308 00:20:34,107 --> 00:20:35,566 Do you think it's snowing in Tulsa... 309 00:20:35,734 --> 00:20:38,569 ...where my husband's having sex on a copying machine? 310 00:20:41,281 --> 00:20:43,532 - Hey. - Oh, my God. 311 00:20:43,700 --> 00:20:45,660 JOEY: Hey. RACHEL: Aw. 312 00:20:45,827 --> 00:20:49,372 Hey. Look at that. It's a Christmas miracle. 313 00:20:51,458 --> 00:20:55,461 - What are you doing here? - I wanted to be with you. 314 00:20:55,629 --> 00:20:57,380 I missed you so much. 315 00:20:57,547 --> 00:21:00,841 - Hey, hey, uh, who'd you miss the most? - Monica. 316 00:21:02,094 --> 00:21:03,928 Gotcha. 317 00:21:06,473 --> 00:21:10,935 - I never wanna leave you again. - But I thought if you left, you'd get fired. 318 00:21:11,144 --> 00:21:14,605 Turns out they can't fire me. Because I quit. 319 00:21:14,982 --> 00:21:18,526 - What? - What? You...? You really quit your job? 320 00:21:18,735 --> 00:21:22,196 Yeah. It was a stupid job, and I could not stand leaving you. 321 00:21:22,489 --> 00:21:24,740 And why should I be the only one who doesn't get to do... 322 00:21:24,908 --> 00:21:26,200 ...what he really wants to do? 323 00:21:26,410 --> 00:21:31,330 - Well, what do you really wanna do? - I have not thought this through. 324 00:21:31,999 --> 00:21:35,501 - Oh, my God. - I know. I should've talked to you first. 325 00:21:35,711 --> 00:21:38,879 No, I think that this is what you wanna do. I think it's great. 326 00:21:39,798 --> 00:21:41,674 Thanks. 327 00:21:41,883 --> 00:21:46,971 Chandler, your being here is the best Christmas present I could ever imagine. 328 00:21:47,222 --> 00:21:48,306 Aw. 329 00:21:48,515 --> 00:21:51,017 - Now give me my real gift. CHANDLER: Yeah. 330 00:21:51,184 --> 00:21:53,227 PHOEBE: Thank you. - Here, pass those around. 331 00:21:53,812 --> 00:21:55,771 ROSS: Oh, hey. 332 00:22:01,611 --> 00:22:05,906 "A donation has been made in your name to the New York City Ballet." 333 00:22:07,659 --> 00:22:09,994 How did you know? 334 00:22:10,162 --> 00:22:14,165 What? Are you kidding? I can't return this. 335 00:22:15,334 --> 00:22:17,710 I thought it was time we started thinking about other people. 336 00:22:17,878 --> 00:22:20,338 And besides, this gift still says I love you guys. 337 00:22:20,547 --> 00:22:24,342 - Mine says, "To Lillian Myers." - I don't have a job. 338 00:22:29,556 --> 00:22:32,141 Actuary? No. 339 00:22:32,476 --> 00:22:35,644 Bookkeeper? Hmm, no. 340 00:22:35,812 --> 00:22:38,397 Topless dancer? 341 00:22:43,820 --> 00:22:47,365 Hey, you know what I just realized? You are the sole wage earner. 342 00:22:47,532 --> 00:22:53,037 You are the head of the household. I don't do anything. I'm a kept man. 343 00:22:53,246 --> 00:22:54,747 You are. 344 00:22:54,915 --> 00:22:56,332 Honey, here's 20 bucks. 345 00:22:56,625 --> 00:22:59,251 Go buy yourself something pretty while I'm at work tomorrow. 346 00:23:06,385 --> 00:23:08,386 [English - US - SDH] 28246

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.