Original subtitles

STARRING ANDY GRIFFITH...

WITH RONNY HOWARD...

ALSO STARRING DON KNOTTS.

THE COWS WAS ALL HERE AN HOUR AGO

AND I HAD TO GO DOWN AND FIX THE SEPARATOR.

WHEN I GOT BACK, ONE OF THEM HAD BEEN TAKEN.

SURE SHE COULDN'T HAVE JUST WANDERED OFF?

NO, SIR. I KEEP A TIGHT GATE.

FURTHERMORE, I CHECKED ON THE UPPER PASTURE.

NO, SIR. SHE'S BEEN STOLE, I TELL YOU

SAME AS LADY HUFF'S COW WAS STOLE.

NOW, I WANT TO KNOW WHAT YOU'RE GONNA DO ABOUT IT.

WELL, WE'LL DO ALL WE CAN.

WE PROMISE YOU THAT.

I CAN'T GET MILK OUT OF PROMISES.

HEY, KEEP AWAY

FROM THAT GATE.

I JUST PUT MY BIG BULL IN THERE

SINCE THE POLICE AIN'T GIVING ME NO PROTECTION

MAYBE HE CAN.

HERE COMES THE MAYOR.

NOW, WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND HERE?

HELLO, TATE. HOW'S CORNELIA? OH, FINE.

NOT A CLUE.

NOT A SINGLE BLESSED CLUE.

YEAH, THAT'S ABOUT WHAT I FIGURED.

AIN'T NOTHIN' MUCH HERE EXCEPT THEIR FOOTPRINTS.

FOOTPRINTS?

YEAH.

ABOUT ALL WE GOT TO GO ON NOW.

SHOCKING, SHOCKING, SHOCKING, THAT'S WHAT IT IS.

TWO COWS HAVE BEEN STOLEN, SHERIFF.

SOMETHING HAS GOT TO BE DONE ABOUT ALL THIS.

I EXPECT YOU'RE RIGHT, MAYOR.

THESE PEOPLE DESERVE PROPER PROTECTION

AND MY ADMINISTRATION IS GONNA SEE TO IT

THAT THEY GET IT.

MAYOR, I TOLD FLETCH WE'D DO ALL WE COULD.

WELL, NOW, THAT DOESN'T SEEM TO BE ENOUGH.

WHAT'D I'D BETTER DO

IS PHONE DOWN TO THE CAPITOL

HAVE THEM SEND UP A REAL PROFESSIONAL.

YES, SIR, TATE.

BY JOLLY, I'M GOING

TO SEE TO IT PERSONALLY THAT YOU GET RESULTS.

I'LL HAVE A MAN HERE IN 24 HOURS

A MAN WHO REALLY KNOWS SOMETHING

ABOUT SOLVING CRIMES.

NO OFFENSE, SHERIFF.

IT JUST HAS TO BE DONE.

YEAH, AND LISTEN, EDGAR, I'D APPRECIATE IT

IF YOU'D PRINT THE DESCRIPTIONS

OF THEM MISSING COWS IN THE PAPER, TOO.

RIGHT. BYE.

WELL?

THE MAYOR SAY WHEN THAT FELLA'D BE COMING BY?

NO. SOMETIME THIS MORNING'S ALL I KNOW.

ALL RIGHT, I'LL SAY IT AGAIN-- I DON'T LIKE IT.

NOW, THE MAYOR HAS GOT NO CALL

TO SUPERSEDE YOUR AUTHORITY LIKE THAT.

WE CAN HANDLE THIS CASE WITHOUT ANY OLD NOSY PARKER

COMING UP HERE FROM THE STATE CAPITAL.

YEAH.

ANDY, YOU DON'T SEEM TO REALIZE HOW SERIOUS THIS IS.

NOW, WE GOT TO PROVE TO THEM THAT WE CAN HANDLE THINGS

OR THEY'LL BE SENDING OUTSIDERS TO MEDDLE IN

EVERY TIME WE TURN AROUND.

BARNEY, MAYBE THIS FELLA CAN BE OF SOME HELP.

NO, NOT LIKELY.

HE'S JUST AN INTERLOPER.

ALL HE'LL BE DOIN' IS INTERLOPIN'.

NOW, WE GOT TO MAKE IT CLEAR TO HIM THAT HE DON'T BELONG.

WE GOT TO STAND TOGETHER AND TURN ON THE BIG FREEZE.

WELL, THAT'S NOT VERY FRIENDLY.

WELL... NOTHING PERSONAL.

JUST BEING REALISTIC.

BOY, IT'S A GOOD THING YOU GOT ME AROUND

YOU KNOW THAT?

YOU'D LET THESE FELLAS JUST WALK ALL OVER YOU.

NO, SIR, I SAY WE FREEZE 'EM OUT.

IS LUKE JENSON BACK?

HUH? NO.

HE'S STILL IN ASHEVILLE COUNTY JAIL. WHY?

THAT LOOKS LIKE HIS DOG

OVER THERE AT ERNIE WALKER'S TRASH CAN.

YEAH. THERE COMES LUKE.

THAT OLD HERMIT BACK IN TOWN?

YEAH.

THE BAD PENNY'S BACK.

WANT ME TO PICK HIM UP?

NO, NO, NO. I DON'T -- I DON'T MEAN TO HOUND HIM.

I'LL JUST GO OVER AND SAY HELLO THOUGH.

FELLOW LIKE LUKE, IT'S A GOOD THING

TO LET HIM REST HIS EYES

ON A SHERIFF'S BADGE EVERY NOW AND THEN.

YEAH.

YEAH. WELL...

ANDY?

HMM?

IF THAT INTERLOPER SHOWS UP

YOU KNOW WHAT HE'S GONNA GET FROM ME?

WHAT?

BIG FREEZE.

GOOD MORNING, LUKE.

SURE HAVE GOT A LOT OF NICE THINGS ON SALE, AIN'T THEY?

PRICES MARKED REAL PLAIN ON EVERYTHING.

YOU NOTICED THAT.

FIGURIN' ON BUYIN' A FRYIN' PAN?

I AIN'T GOT NO MONEY.

AIN'T NO HARM IN LOOKING'.

NO, NO. NO HARM IN LOOKING

BUT I WOULDN'T TAKE THAT "SERVE YOURSELF" SIGN

TOO SERIOUSLY.

SEE YOU, LUKE.

DID YOU HEAR THAT, MACK?

YOU HEARD WHAT HE SAID, HUH?

DID YOU HEAR WHAT HE SAID?

"PRICES MARKED REAL PLAIN ON EVERYTHING," HE SAID.

HUH.

WELL, HE KNOWS THAT

POOR OL' LUKE DON'T HAVE NO MONEY.

YES.

EVERYBODY KNOWS

POOR OL' LUKE DON'T HAVE NO MONEY.

EVERYBODY.

EVERYBODY, EXCEPT YOU AND ME.

YEAH.

YES, SIR.

THAT'S HIM. IT'S GOTTA BE.

BIG, BLACK CAR, CAPITAL CITY LICENSE.

LET'S MAKE OUT LIKE WE'RE NOT HERE.

BARNEY!

ALL RIGHT, BUT LET'S NOT BEND AN INCH.

LET'S SHOW HIM HE'S GOT THE BOTH OF US

TO STAND AGAINST.

LET'S JUST GIVE HIM THE BIG FREEZE.

HOWDY.

GOOD MORNING.

I'M, UH, WILLIAM UPCHURCH OF THE SPECIAL INVESTIGATION SECTION.

YOU MUST BE SHERIFF TAYLOR.

UH, NO. THIS HERE IS SHERIFF TAYLOR.

I'M DEPUTY FIFE.

OH, UH, SORRY.

I JUST ASSUMED, WHAT WITH THE SIDEARM

AND THE TIE AND ALL, THAT YOU MUST BE THE SHERIFF.

OH, WELL, THAT'S ALL RIGHT.

IT'S A LOGICAL MISTAKE.

GLAD TO MEET YOU, MR. UPCHURCH.

NICE OF YOU TO COME DOWN ON SUCH SHORT NOTICE.

OH, IT'S JUST PART OF THE JOB.

FIFE, DID YOU SAY?

UH, WASN'T IT YOU WHO MADE THAT SPECIAL REPORT

ABOUT SAFETY PROCEDURES ON COUNTRY ROADS?

YEAH, THAT WAS ME.

AND YOU HAD A LITTLE JINGLE, TOO.

"WALK ON THE LEFT SIDE AFTER DARK

OR YOU'LL WIND UP PLAYIN' THE HARP."

VERY EFFECTIVE.

WELL, I JUST INJECTED A NOTE OF HUMOR.

IT MUST BE GRATIFYING

TO HAVE AN ALERT NUMBER-TWO MAN.

OH, IT IS.

IT REALLY IS... GRATIFYING.

SIT DOWN, WON'T YOU?

YEAH. LET ME GET YOU A CUSHION.

HERE. SIT RIGHT DOWN.

WE'VE GOT SOME FRESH COFFEE, IF YOU'D LIKE SOME.

UH, NO, THANK YOU.

UH, ABOUT THE CASE, MR. UPCHURCH,

WE'RE DOIN' ALL WE CAN.

OF COURSE, IF YOU'VE GOT ANY SUGGESTIONS

WE'D BE GLAD TO LISTEN.

IN A BUSINESS LIKE THIS, I ALWAYS SAY

THE MORE COOPERATION YOU CAN GET, THE BETTER.

THAT'S GRATIFYING TO HEAR, MR. FIFE.

OH... BARNEY.

BARNEY. I DO APPRECIATE YOUR FRIENDLY ATTITUDE.

I SOMETIMES FIND THE LOCAL SHERIFF'S DEPARTMENT A BIT RESENTFUL.

THEY REGARD ME AS AN OUTSIDER.

NO.

OH, YES.

YOU MEAN LIKE AN INTERLOPER?

EXACTLY.

THEY DO? THEY DO.

WELL, NOW, GETTING DOWN TO THE CASE...

YEAH, THE CASE.

...I HAVE ONLY THE SKETCHIEST DETAILS. THAT'S ALL RIGHT.

BUT AS I UNDERSTAND IT

THERE'S BEEN SOME CATTLE THIEVING.

THAT'S RIGHT.

I SUPPOSE THE FIRST STEP

WOULD BE A VISIT TO THE PREMISES.

YEAH. IT WOULD.

WELL, FINE.

LET'S JUST GO RIGHT ON OUT TO THE PREMISES.

RIGHT ON OUT TO 'EM.

I'LL GET THE CAR. IT'S RIGHT OUTSIDE.

I'LL HOPE YOU'LL EXCUSE THE FACT

THAT IT AIN'T BEEN WASHED

BUT I'VE JUST BEEN SO BUSY.

I UNDERSTAND.

I SUPPOSE WE'D BETTER PICK UP THE MAYOR, TOO

SINCE HE'S THE ONE WHO REQUESTED ME.

FINE, FINE. THE MORE THE MERRIER.

BARN, LISTEN, REMEMBER-- ME AND YOU-- THE BIG FREEZE.

LET'S HOLD IT RIGHT HERE.

NOW, YOU WILL NOTICE

THAT OVER THERE IS A FENCE

AND IN THE FENCE IS A GATE.

NOW, FOR ALL APPARENT INDICATIONS

THE MISSING ANIMAL WAS REMOVED

FROM THE AFOREMENTIONED PREMISES

BY MEANS OF UTILIZATION OF THE GATE

WHICH IS IN THE FENCE.

THAT SOUNDS LIKE A REASONABLE HYPOTHESIS

OF THE MODUS OPERANDI.

UH, YEAH. THAT'S ANOTHER WAY TO PUT IT.

I WILL NOW DEMONSTRATE

HOW EASILY

THE GATE CAN BE OPENED BY UNAUTHORIZED PERSONNEL.

FIFE, WE ALL KNOW HOW A GATE OPENS.

THE MAIN THING NOW IS TO GET THOSE COWS

BACK TO THE GOOD PEOPLE AND LOYAL SUPPORTERS

WHO OWN THEM.

MAYOR, THE DESCRIPTIONS IS IN THE PAPER

AND FOLKS WILL BE ON THE LOOKOUT

IF ANYBODY TRIES TO SELL ONE OF 'EM.

UH... AREN'T THOSE UH, FOOTPRINTS OVER THERE?

WELL, YES. YES.

THOSE ARE FOOTPRINTS.

I PRESUME YOU MADE A MOULAGE, SHERIFF.

YOU KNOW WHAT A MOULAGE IS, DON'T YOU?

A PLASTER CAST OF THE PRINTS.

NO. IT DIDN'T SEEM LIKE IT'D BE MUCH HELP.

OH, IT COULD BE VERY VALUABLE.

GATE OPENS EASY ENOUGH

BUT WE'D BEST KEEP IT CLOSED.

WE GOT A BULL IN THERE.

THE SHERIFF TELLS ME YOU DECIDED

NOT TO MAKE A MOULAGE.

A MOULAGE?

YEAH, THAT'S RIGHT.

WE DECIDED NOT TO MAKE A MOULAGE.

OH, WE TOLD A FEW PEOPLE

BUT WE DECIDED IT DIDN'T MAKE SENSE

UPSETTING FOLKS RUNNING AROUND

BLABBING, MAKING A BIG MOULAGE OUT OF IT.

UH, BARNEY, HE MEANS

A PLASTER CAST OF THE PRINTS.

THAT KIND OF A MOULAGE.

WELL, IT DOESN'T MAKE ANY DIFFERENCE.

THE GROUND'S ALL BEEN TRAMPLED ON NOW.

YOU GOT ANY LEADS, SHERIFF?

UH, NO, NOTHING DEFINITE.

WHAT DO YOU THINK, MR. UPCHURCH?

THIS IS DEFINITELY THE WORK OF A GANG.

THERE ARE THREE SEPARATE SETS OF FOOTPRINTS HERE.

IT COULDN'T BE THE WORK OF JUST ONE MAN.

A GANG, HEH?

THREE MEN.

WELL, NOW WE'RE GETTING SOMEPLACE.

GOOD WORK, UPCHURCH.

OH, JUST A BASIC OBSERVATION.

WELL, COME ON, SHERIFF.

LET'S GET BUSY.

LET'S GO FIND THOSE THREE FELLAS.

ALL RIGHT, LITTLE LADY.

THERE DON'T SEEM TO BE ON ONE AROUND.

WHAT SAY YOU COME TAKE A NICE WALK WITH OLD LUKE, HUH?

WELL, NOW, STEP PRETTY, LITTLE LADY, STEP PRETTY.

COME ON. COME ON.

STEP PRETTY.

I THINK THAT CAN USE JUST A TOUCH MORE PLASTER.

I ALWAYS LIKE TO MAKE MY MOULAGES

A BIT ON THE SOLID SIDE.

I LIKE TO USE A LITTLE EGG WHITE IN MINE--

MAKES THEM MOISTER AND FLUFFIER.

ANDY, THIS IS NO JOKE.

IF WE'D HAVE DONE THIS SOONER

WE'D HAVE HAD THIS CASE WRAPPED UP BY NOW.

I HOPE IT HELPS, BARN. I REALLY DO.

OH, IT WILL.

THAT MR. UPCHURCH IS A REAL PRO. HE'S JUST SMART AS A WHIP.

YOU KNOW, THIS IS THE KIND OF MODERN CRIME-BUSTING

I'VE BEEN TRYING TO TELL YOU WE SHOULD HAVE BEEN DOING.

ALL READY HERE.

EXCUSE ME, ANDY. IT'S MOULAGE TIME.

YES. THESE TELL THEIR LITTLE STORY, ALL RIGHT.

LIKE SEE HERE.

NOW, THIS FELLA IS PROBABLY THE LEADER...

UH-HUH.

BECAUSE THIS FELLA ALWAYS WALKS

DIRECTLY BEHIND HIM.

YEAH. SORT OF LIKE HERO WORSHIP.

THAT'S RIGHT.

PRETTY SMART OUTFIT.

DON'T SEEM SO SMART TO ME.

LOOK AT OLD NUMBER TWO THERE.

INSTEAD OF FOLLOWING HIS LEADER

HE WALKED RIGHT THROUGH

THAT MUD HOLE.

YEAH, HE DID.

WELL, IT, UH... DOESN'T MEAN A THING.

REMEMBER, IT WAS NIGHT.

IT'S HARD TO SEE PUDDLES IN THE DARK.

THAT'S RIGHT, ANDY.

YOU COULD HAVE FIGURED THAT OUT.

MY MOULAGE AIN'T TOO THICK, IS IT?

NO. IT'S JUST RIGHT.

WELL, THIS WILL SET UP FAST, AND THEN

WE'LL TAKE THE CASTS IN FOR EXTENDED DATA ANALYSIS.

YEAH, I WAS JUST GONNA SUGGEST THAT MYSELF.

LET ME POUR.

A-HA. THERE.

I'VE MEASURED THE DEPTH OF EACH OF THESE FOOTPRINTS

AND THAT GIVES US AN IDEA OF THE WEIGHT

OF EACH MAN WHO MADE EACH PARTICULAR PRINT.

THAT'S VERY GOOD.

YOU SEE, MAYOR, THE HEAVIER THE MAN IS,

THE DEEPER HIS FEET SINK INTO THE GROUND.

OH, REALLY?

LEASTWAYS, THAT'S THE WAY ME AND UPCHURCH SEE IT.

OUR MEASUREMENTS INDICATE THAT ONE MAN, ABEL

IS OF AVERAGE WEIGHT, OR PERHAPS SLIGHTLY LESS

WHILE THE TWO OTHERS WHOM WE'VE DESIGNATED

AS BAKER AND CHARLIE ARE HEAVIER.

MUCH HEAVIER.

EXACT WEIGHTS ARE DIFFICULT TO ASCERTAIN

BUT A SEASONED GUESS

WOULD PUT THEM IN EXCESS OF 250 POUNDS.

OH?

YOU SEE, MAYOR, I DON'T THINK

YOU'RE GETTING THE OVERALL PICTURE.

NOW, ABEL THERE IS A SMALL MAN

WHEREAS BAKER AND CHARLIE...

FIFE, DON'T EXPLAIN IT TO ME.

WELL, I DECLARE, UPCHURCH

THIS IS REALLY SOMETHING.

DID YOU HEAR THAT, SHERIFF?

SHERIFF!

UM, YEAH, I HEARD.

THAT MAKES GOOD SENSE.

THEN WHY AREN'T YOU OVER HERE, PAYING ATTENTION?

I WAS LISTENING.

I WAS JUST LOOKING OUT THE WINDOW.

SHERIFF, WILL YOU PLEASE

STOP GUMPING OUT THAT WINDOW

AND GET ON THE BALL?

NOW AT LAST WE'VE GOT A LEAD

ON THOSE THREE CROOKS--

TWO BIG ONES AND ONE LITTLER.

NOW I WANT THIS CRIME WAVE STOPPED.

I WANT CONSTANT PATROLS ON EVERY PLACE THAT KEEPS COWS.

BY JOLLY, I WANT THOSE THREE MEN BROUGHT IN.

MR. MAYOR, WE'LL BRING THEM IN, ALL RIGHT,

NOW THAT WE'VE GOT A MAKE ON THEM.

RIGHT, AND?

RIGHT.

WELL, LET'S GET TO IT.

SARAH, GET ME TATE FLETCHER.

WELL, I DON'T KNOW, SHERIFF.

THIS SOUNDS LIKE A LOT OF DURN AWFUL FOOLISHNESS TO ME.

WELL, IT COULD BE, FLETCH

BUT THEN AGAIN, IT MIGHT JUST END THIS COW STEALING.

HOW LONG DO I HAVE TO STAY HERE?

JUST BE PATIENT NOW, FLETCH.

OLD LUKE, HE COMES BY HERE EVERY DAY ABOUT THIS TIME.

I'D LIKE TO GET ON BACK TO THE FARM.

I'VE GOT A... SHH, SHH.

: YEAH, THAT'S A NICE COW

YOU GOT THERE, FLETCH.

YOU TAKE CARE.

DON'T LET ANYBODY STEAL HER.

BETTER KEEP HER FASTENED UP

IN YOUR CORRAL.

YOU GOT ANY LEADS ON THE COW THIEVES?

NO, NOTHING DEFINITE, BUT WE KNOW

THERE'S THREE OF THEM.

TWO OF THEM'S PRETTY GOOD-SIZE MEN.

SO IF ANYBODY OF THAT DESCRIPTION

COMES BY YOUR PLACE

YOU LET ME KNOW.

CHANCES ARE, I'LL BE WORKING REAL LATE

AT THE OFFICE TONIGHT

SO YOU CAN GET A CALL THROUGH TO ME HERE.

I'LL SEE YOU, FLETCH.

YOU HEAR THAT, MACK?

SOME BAD FELLAS BEEN STEALING COWS.

YOU KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT THAT, DO YOU?

HUH?

SEEMS, UH, THREE FELLAS BEEN DOING IT,

TWO OF THEM PRETTY GOOD SIZE.

YES.

THREE FELLAS.

MACK...

MACK...

THE SHERIFF IS GONNA BE IN HIS OFFICE EXTRA LATE TONIGHT.

YEAH.

THIS MIGHT BE JUST THE NIGHT

FOR THOSE THREE FELLAS TO TAKE ANOTHER WALK.

I STILL DON'T THINK MUCH OF THE IDEA.

WELL, TIME WILL TELL, FLETCH.

BETTER GET AWAY FROM THAT WINDOW.

COME RIGHT ON IN.

HELLO, MAYOR.

SHERIFF, WHAT IS ALL THIS?

WHY HAVE YOU PULLED THESE MEN IN OFF PATROL?

THOUGHT I MIGHT NEED A LITTLE HELP

TO CATCH A COW THIEF.

THE COW THIEVES? HERE?

CHANCES LOOK PRETTY GOOD.

WELL, I'D BE PROUD TO KNOW

HOW YOU FIGURED THAT OUT, SHERIFF.

I THOUGHT YOU MIGHT, MAYOR.

THIS HERE'S THE WAY

THE PRINTS LINE UP, AIN'T IT?

YES, UH... APPROXIMATELY.

MM-HMM.

THERE SEEMS TO BE

ONE SET OF PRINTS MISSING.

I DON'T GET YOU, ANDY.

THEY'RE ALL HERE--

ABEL, BAKER AND CHARLIE.

WHERE'S THE PRINTS MADE BY THE COW?

THE COW?

THE COW?

YEAH.

THEN AGAIN, MAYBE THE COW'S PRINTS ARE HERE.

NOW, THESE TWO FELLAS HERE--

THEY ALWAYS SEEM TO FOLLOW THIS FELLA.

THAT RIGHT THERE MIGHT SUGGEST SOMETHING.

WHAT?

WELL, THESE PRINTS COULD BE MADE BY THREE MEN.

THEN AGAIN, THEY COULD BE MADE BY A MAN AND A COW.

A COW?!

SHOES ON A COW?

THAT WOULD SEEM TO EXPLAIN EVERYTHING

AND THAT MAN JUST COULD BE LUKE JENSON.

SHERIFF TAYLOR, DID YOU CALL THESE MEN

AWAY FROM THEIR DUTY

JUST TO GIVE THEM THAT HAREBRAINED IDEA?

I FIGURED THEY'D NEED SOME HELP.

LUKE KNOWS FLETCH HAS GOT A PRIZE COW OUT THERE

AND I FIGURED HE'LL COME BY TONIGHT

TO HELP HISSELF TO IT.

THEN WHY AREN'T YOU OUT THERE WAITING FOR HIM?

HE'S TOO SMART FOR THAT.

LUKE OR HIS DOG WOULD SPOT US FOR SURE.

WE'VE GOT TO GET HIM WITH THE EVIDENCE

SO I FIGURED WE'D WAIT IN HERE AND LET HIM TURN HISSELF IN.

YOU SEE --

SHERIFF, I AM A PATIENT MAN

BUT I'VE HEARD ENOUGH.

I HAVE HEARD ENOUGH.

I AM NOT GOING TO PERMIT

THE ENTIRE LAW FORCE OF MAYBERRY

TO SET AROUND IN SOMEBODY'S PARLOR

ON SOME IMPOSSIBLE THEORY

WHILE THOSE CROOKS COULD BE CLEANING OUT EVERY FARM

IN THE COUNTY.

COME ON, MEN.

YOU COMING?

NO. I'M GOING TO STAY HERE.

DEPUTY FIFE...

WELL, SHERIFF, I, UH...

I'LL GO MAKE US A POT OF COFFEE.

WELL?

I-I JUST, UH...

THOUGHT I'D, UH... WAIT WITH YOU A SPELL.

WELL, I APPRECIATE THAT, BARN, BUT...

MAYOR COULD BE RIGHT.

COULD BE A KIND OF A HAREBRAINED IDEA.

WELL, I'LL TAKE MY CHANCES.

I WAS ALMOST OUT TO THE CAR, AND...

I GOT TO REMEMBERING...

ANOTHER TIME A FEW YEARS BACK WHEN...

ANOTHER MAYOR OF OUR TOWN

ACCUSED YOU OF HAVING A HAREBRAINED IDEA.

REMEMBER THAT?

THAT WAS WHEN YOU HAD THE IDEA...

OF MAKING ME YOUR DEPUTY.

WELL, WE'D BETTER GET THESE... THESE THINGS OFF THE FLOOR.

Luke: NO! GET AWAY!

Fletcher: IT'S HIM, SHERIFF! COME ON!

COME ON, BARN!

YEAH. ANDY, WAIT!

I'VE GOT TO GET MY...

WAIT A MINUTE. HOLD IT!

I'VE GOT TO... GET MY BULLET.

Luke: NO! GET AWAY!

WHAT'S GOING ON?

WHAT'S THE TROUBLE?

HE'S CAUGHT HIM.

I RECKON THAT'S ALL

THE PROOF WE'LL NEED.

WELL, I DECLARE.

IS IT POSSIBLE?

THEN HE WAS OUT THERE, STEALING A COW.

NOT EXACTLY A COW.

YOU'RE LOOKING AT WHAT HAPPENS

WHEN A NEARSIGHTED MAN

TRIES TO PUT SHOES ON A ORNERY OLD BULL.

BOY, WHEN AUNT BEE CLEANS OUT AN ATTIC,

SHE REALLY CLEANS OUT AN ATTIC, DON'T SHE?

THIS STUFF -- MNH.

PA? YEAH, WHAT?

WHAT'S THIS?

OH, THAT'S AN OLD UMBRELLA STAND

MADE OUT OF AN ELEPHANT'S FOOT.

AUNT BEE NEVER DID LIKE IT.

CAN I PLAY WITH IT?

SURE.

WELL, BARN, DID MR. UPCHURCH GET OFF ALL RIGHT?

YEP. YEAH, HE'S GONE, BUT HE WON'T FORGET US.

YOU RECKON?

NO.

I'D SAY THIS WHOLE THING'S TAUGHT HIM A VALUABLE LESSON.

YEAH? OH, YEAH.

SEE, UPCHURCH IS THE TYPE

THAT'S LIABLE TO GO ON INCONCLUSIVE EVIDENCE --

YOU KNOW, HE SEES SOMETHING RIGHT OFF --

HE JUMPS TO CONCLUSIONS, GETS CARRIED AWAY,

DOESN'T STOP TO THINK, YOU KNOW?

TYPICAL SHORTCOMING

THAT WOULDN'T HAPPEN TO A SEASONED LAWMAN.

I DON'T KNOW, BARN.

HE WAS JUST DOING HIS JOB.

ANDY, WHAT'S THAT?

THAT'S AN ANIMAL TRACK!

IT IS! ANDY, THAT'S AN ELEPHANT!

THAT'S WHAT IT IS, IS AN ELEPHANT!

WHY, THERE'S A ROGUE ELEPHANT ON THE LOOSE!

HE'LL TRAMPLE THE CROPS, CARRY OFF THE BABIES!

ANDY, WE GOT TO MOVE!

YOU KNOW ANYBODY THAT'S GOT AN ELEPHANT GUN?

BARNEY,

I DON'T BELIEVE HE'LL GET VERY FAR ON JUST THREE LEGS.

THREE LEGS?

OPIE'S GOT THE FOURTH.