Original subtitles

What is a Juggalo?

Is a Juggalo a diehard superfan of Insane Clown Posse,

greatest duo in horrorcore rap music?

Sure.

But that's just the tip of the fuckin' iceberg.

We freaks, weirdos, outlaws,

derelicts, outcasts, unwanted, unloved, forgotten.

We are Juggalos.

And we are family.

Our hearts are covered in clown paint, y'all.

And that shit ain't never washin' off.

Mr. Macintosh, today's the day.

I don't wanna see you back here, okay?

Oh shit. What up, Faith?

I'm feelin' that beat, Trey. You ready?

Fuckin' A, homie.

Been ready.

Powers that be never gave a chance to people like us.

We scary to them.

America: land of the greed.

Home of the sheep.

One wine-flavored Black & Mild.

One novelty necklace.

Yeah, that's my shit.

Sign here.

Why do Juggalos paint our faces like clowns?

Maybe it's to mock society's mask.

I ain't never wearin' orange again.

It's a bullshit color anyway.

I want a copy of your Diabolical Deadbeats demo.

The name sounds dumb as shit when I hear it out loud.

Damn.

Well, I still wanna hear it.

Thanks for lookin' out for me, Faith.

Ninjas gotta stick together.

Stay gold, Trey.

Whoop, whoop.

Whoop, whoop.

The Gathering of the Juggalos

is our Shangri-La.

For one weekend a year we can let go,

live among our own, and get fucked up proper.

But the rest of the year, we gotta survive

among the society that rejects us.

One fucka-sippi, two fucka-sippi,

three fucka-sippi.

You cut me? I bleed clown paint.

Whoop, whoop.

Okay, Meemaw, time to make haste with the waste.

What you wanna eat for dinner?

We got... Beef Garden Vegetable

or Chicken Itty-bitty Noodle.

Chicken?

A dignified choice, madame.

Yum yum!

All right, Meemaw. I'm out.

Janice gonna come over in, like, a hour.

Make sure you're not fucked up and shit, okay?

Love you, Meemaw.

We hustlers with hearts of gold.

We down-ass homies.

We down with the clown 'til we dead in the ground.

Show me your butthole!

- Whoop, whoop! - Whoop, whoop!

Put that shit away!

Don't be such a wet fart, come here.

Fuck is wrong with you, man?

You complete me. Missed you, homie.

Are you getting hard right now?

Get the fuck off me!

Where are my keys at?

I took good care of her for you.

Uh-huh.

Oh, shit!

We are down with the clown

'til we dead in the ground.

Hot box that grave, big bro.

- From ashes - ... to smashes.

I could really use some advice right now, Mike.

You could ask me for advice.

You ain't got the sense your brother did, ninja.

I do... prefer nonsense.

Listen, homie...

I don't think I should go this year.

Ninja, what!?

You got no idea what it's like in there, man.

I'm on my third fuckin' strike now.

Mike, I am sorry you gotta listen to

this juffalo talk like this.

I gotta grow up, dude. Be a real fuckin' man.

What about your Juggalo fam?

Scottie D, Jimmy Soda, Mankini?

Butthole Ben?

You wanna disappoint Butthole Ben?

I mean, no, I love Butthole Ben.

Well, this shit you're talkin' right now

is very fuckin' stale.

I can't keep wildin' out like we're kids, Silas.

That's what got me locked up in the first fuckin' place.

Homie, I know I'm the reason you got locked up.

And...

I'm mad bummed about that.

That frat boy had it comin'.

But I ain't even thought

I would ever hear you say this shit.

Trey, you know the Gathering

is the only place I feel comfortable being myself.

It's where we belong.

If I go, it's gotta be different this year.

No stealin' golf carts.

No tippin' over porta-potties.

No trickin' ninjas into picking up poop dollars.

No butt chugging.

Butt chugging ain't illegal!

Si, I'm fuckin' serious, man.

You gotta promise to not fuck my shit up.

Promise me.

The carnival provides.

Yo, why you take the off-ramp?

Why take the same old road?

Trying to turn over a new leaf and shit, remember?

Yeah, but Pearlington sucks ass.

Yeah, well, someone forgot to fill up the wagon

and I want to eat something that ain't fuckin' prison food.

You know Scarecrow live out here, right?

Dude practically runs this joint.

I do not wanna see that psycho.

We'll make it quick, yeah?

Aight.

Yo, you got any gas money?

Fuckin' totally assed out.

Don't worry about it.

I've been sellin' my roids to this gay bodybuilders

and I cashed Meemaw's Social Security check, so we good.

Meemaw! Fuck, I miss her, man.

She doin' aight?

I mean she's a vegetable.

She fine, she's just like a poop machine, you know?

Still gonna take butthole pics for her though, right?

She ain't dead yet!

Juggalo family just hits different than blood family.

A lot of us ain't welcome with our own kin.

But our Juggalo family?

That shit.

That shit is unconditional.

-Thanks! -Don't forget the Rockin' Raspberry.

No, I won't.

Also the Passion Fruit Pear.

What am I, an asshole?

Jesus...

Also the Sun Surge!

Think I never bought Juggalo Juice before, goddamn!

Fuckin' goofus.

Oh, what, what?

Sup?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Shit...

Ooh!

Oh, uh, give me a Blind Pelican

and 10 bucks on pump one, old timer.

That's a lot of sodie pop.

It ain't just soda, homie. That's Juggalo fuel.

You, uh, make a lot of money in that line of work, do you, son?

Not "gigolo", man, "Juggalo."

- You know Insane Clown Posse? - Uh-huh.

We're on our way to Ohio for the Gathering.

The Gathering of the Juggalos. Kind of a music festival.

More like a fuckin' religious pilgrimage.

The only posse I know in Ohio

wouldn't take too kindly to no gigolos.

Guess you ain't down with the clown, then, huh?

I loathe clowns.

They scare me.

On my ninth birthday party...

I caught a clown...

having sexual relations with my momma.

What the fuck?

I still can't eat salt water taffy.

Yeah, fuck Taffy.

I gotta split, man.

Keep the change, amigo.

Son...

never trust a painted face.

Shit,

I only trust a painted face.

Ring-a-ding!

At the Gathering,

you will hear complete strangers tellin' each other "I love you."

They may have never met.

But, if you're a Juggalo,

then you're fuckin' family.

All right, man, so I've got a serious question for you.

When are you gonna play me that finished fuckin' demo?

Oh, shit!

Homie, I thought you'd never ask!

Let's get that shit going, man.

Hear that fresh Diabolical.

Yeah, bitch.

That say dick pics for days?

Yeah.

You fucked up.

- Listen up. - Yeah?

Oh man, fuckin' dope

how you distorted those vocals there?

And that flow, man? Fuck.

Damn, homie!

You put in work while I was in the big house, huh?

Shit sound fucking good!

Thank you, homie.

Fuckin' fresh, no doubt.

You know what's not fresh, though?

"Diabolical Deadbeats."

We need something fresh to death.

We need a angle, like them old wrestlers had.

And I need some street cred, yo, because

you about to be jugga-famous, but I ain't shit.

Aight, Copernicus,

where you gonna find street cred?

Oh, you don't find it. It finds fuckin' you.

Juggalo fam is ride or die.

No matter what kind of shit goes down.

I been baptized in soda pop.

It's gonna be called Toxic Trey's Ice Cream Posse.

And it's gonna be custom Juggalo ice cream.

Hm?

Hey, you wanna try some of this Colonel Silas' Secret Recipe?

Bro, you get caught with that shit, I'm fuckin' bailin'.

Did you hear anything I fuckin' said?

I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream.

Don't mock my cream dream, man.

Homie, what you want from me?

I'm out here trying to be a rap god

and you, you wanna hang it all up

to be like the goddamn Good Humor homie?

I just thought I'd tell you, man.

After the Gathering?

Converting the Hatchet Wagon to an ice cream truck.

Already made the down payment, so...

Fuck my hairy butthole, you're serious.

Mm-hmm.

Hello?

Yeah, this Silasshole.

Oh, we are on our way.

Are you serious?

Oh yeah. No, that'd be...

Uh, we ain't got a name yet.

Uh, TBD. Is that like ICP?

Oh, okay. Sound check.

Saturday?

Yo, there ain't nothin' that can keep us from being there!

Thank you, fam.

No, thank the fuck you.

Much clown love!

Whoop, whoop!

The fuck was that?

Ah, just a little someone from the Gathering.

What!?

They had a cancellation.

We're gonna perform, mothafucka,

on the Clown Drip Stage at the Gathering on Saturday.

What the fuck are you talkin' about?

I submitted our demo and now we are performing.

The carnival provides, Trey.

Holy fuck.

Holy fuck!

Wait, yo, yo...

You don't rap in public, though.

I've seen you. You fuckin' choke like a joke.

Not no more, man. I've been practicing.

Believe that when I see it.

Well, believe this ninja.

Mm!

Si, what the fuck?

Yo, 'scuse me!

Si, what the fuck?

Yeah!

Did you want me to, uh, box that up?

Man, I didn't even finish my bird!

This is a family establishment.

Suck my dick, you mark-ass buster!

Everything was delicious, thank you.

Yo!

Fuckin' proud of you, man.

You got mad huevos!

-Let's go, ninja! -Whoa!

Fuck!

Motherfucker! Look at my fucking shirt, man.

Oh, sorry--

Don't fuckin' touch me, you freak.

Oh shit.

Milkshake's fuckin' garbage now.

Well, I said I'm fuckin' sorry, didn't I?

You're gonna regret running into me, you fuckin' mutt.

What the fuck did you call me?

You wanna get physical, huh?

Let's fucking go, huh? Huh?

No, no, no...

It's, it's cool.

My brother didn't mean nothin'.

He's just a floob.

Yo, that's the fuckin' law, man.

Let's make like a tree and get the fuck.

My bad, bro.

That's right, be respectful of the gentleman

and his expensive shirt.

The fuck...

Man...

I will always hate fucking cops.

It's like a law of the universe.

Glad you checked me, homie.

About to fuck that chicken up!

I got you, fam.

What the fuck?

Stop!-

Help! Help!

- Go, go, go! -Eat your fuckin' chicken fingers

Where you at?

What the fuck was that? Should we do something?

Dude, we ridin' so dirty, we're Pigpen!

You want to go to fucking jail again?

I mean, when you put it like that...

Look, let's just play another track,

forget this shit.

This one's called Clown Sex.

Okay!

Okay.

Ooh!

Damn, homie, this beat is mad sexual!

Uh!

I tell you a year in lockup,

shit will make you horny as fuck.

Shit's all backed up.

I feel like fuckin' superglue with no lid,

know what I mean?

Hey, but now you all jugga-famous

'cause of that shit with Scarecrow,

it's gonna be mad easy for you

to get the skins at the Gathering.

Bro, at this point?

You put a pair of fake tits up on the telephone pole,

I'mma go Woody Woodpecker on that bitch.

There ain't nothin' better than some sweaty,

stinky fuckin' tent sex at the Gathering.

Uh, smell like that shit mud

from the Gathering of the Mudalos.

Remember that shit?

What was the name of the Jugalette you smashed that year?

Ah, Psychosis, bro!

Yeah, Psychosis!

Yo, she was wifey material, though. For real.

Man, that year fuckin' sucked.

I don't know about all that.

It did smell like the devil's anus.

But I smashed and I made enough cheddar to get my surgery,

so silver linings playbook.

Only a true wicked clown like you

would let ninjas staple money all over their body.

Shit, man, I'd do it again!

And I made bank when I convinced those juffalos

that I could get Deviant Dan to cut his nipples off.

- That was you? - Well, here's the thing.

He was plannin' on doing it already, so...

easy money!

Oh, earnin' and burnin'!

Carnival provides, yo.

The Gathering.

It's like adult summer camp

where all the counselors huff nitrous.

Lifelong friends are made.

Babies are conceived.

Couples get married.

And all are invited

to openly shit in garbage cans.

You know, God...

is a Juggalo.

This Dark Carnival shit is for real.

I think I'm starting to see the light, Father Silas.

It's like Meemaw always said,

"It's always darkest before the dawn."

What the--bro, that cop is tailin' us.

Nah!

You just 'noid 'cause you just out the hoosegow.

He's pullin' me over.

What the fuck?

Fuck, fuck!

You were goin' the speed limit.

What the fuck?

I'm goin' back to goddamn jail.

Fuck me in the ass!

Trey, you're not going back to jail.

I'm not about to let nothing get between us and the Gathering.

We are road warriors, bro. Let me handle this.

Please don't do anything fuckin' stupid, okay?

Stupid!?

You're the one who almost punched a sheriff!

Your conflict resolution skills are lacking, bro!

Violence has to be plan B.

Yeah, what the fuck is plan A?

Treat him like a bully.

Show 'em who's alpha.

Confuse their dumb white asses.

Man, that's a stupid, stupid fucking plan.

What's the problem, Officer... R. Cox?

Where you boys headed?

Church. We're going to Sunday school.

It's Thursday,

and I was speaking to the driver.

License and registration, please.

Psst, shut the fuck up, dude.

Can you tell me what I did wrong, Officer?

Smells fragrant.

What y'all been smokin'?

That's just incense.

It's for his anxiety.

Who else knows you're out here?

My sound cloud followers. My meemaw.

That's a weird question, Officer.

Why don't we, uh, see what y'all have in the back?

Uh, I don't think you can do that, Officer.

Don't you need, like, a warrant, right?

I have probable cause.

You see, this vehicle reeks of marijuana.

Further, it is littered with gang paraphernalia.

What gang?

Juggalos, right?

FBI classified Juggalos as a gang.

Nah, we squashed that shit.

The clowns sued the FBI. Get with the now.

The actions of a few do not define us all, my brother.

It's like saying all Germans are Nazis.

Yeah, or all cops are cocks!

Get the fuck out of the vehicle.

Whoa!

Welcome to Mississippi... dickheads.

Fuck...

Let's don't make the news, okay?

-Okay? -Okay.

Open up the back of this thing.

Let's see.

Open it.

Ohhhkay.

Uh, all that shit is intended for my own personal use.

It's my vitamins and shit.

That is an impressive collection.

Looks like, uh, 30 years to life to me.

Hope you aren't a repeat offender.

'Cause if so, you gonna be in for a world of shit.

That's right.

Boys at county gonna have a lot of fun with you.

You fuckin' freak.

And it's not even mine!

You know, transporting narcotics

across state lines is trafficking...

and a federal crime.

Oh!

What are you doin', man?

Silas, what the fuck!?

Are you fucking crazy!?

Si, you're gonna kill him, man!

What happened to plan A?

Silas, what the fuck?

No, no, no! Don't!

Don't, man.

Enjoy the Shadowside... porky!

Silas, no! Don't shoot!

Get the fuck over here! Let's get the fuck outta here!

Fuck, fuck, fuck...

You just punched my ticket back to prison, you fuck!

"It's not even mine"? Narc!

Man, I don't get you.

You just did a year for my ass

and now you about to sell me out?

I ain't gonna do a bid over some dumb shit, Silas!

The year I did was 'cause I was protecting you, man!

You were protecting me? Yeah, right.

What the fuck did you say?

What are we gonna do, Silas?

We hightail it to the Gathering.

Fuck that, man.

We'll be smelling bacon the whole way.

Van ain't exactly low profile.

Homie, I just gave that blue boy enough acid

to make him think he is an orange.

Acid?

It's not for splittin' wigs, Trey!

It's for expanding minds.

I'm gonna sell some of this MKUltra at the Gathering.

Do you have any idea what they'll do to you in prison?

Don't worry. You'll be there to protect me.

Stop acting so hard, man.

I've seen you piss the bed recently.

One time!

Fuck.

We gotta get off the fuckin' road, man.

Lay low for a minute.

You know Scarecrow's not too far from here, right?

Scarecrow!?

What the fuck, man?

You trying to get me fucking killed now?

The ninja got a redneck car lot.

Maybe we can swap out the Hatchet Wagon

for a... you know, a clean ride!

What the fuck makes you think he's gonna wanna help us?

Okay, you may need to apologize to him first--

Fuck that!

Mothafucka had it fucking coming.

Fuck him!

Man, we got this sick fuckin' demo!

We're gonna perform! Our shit is going to pop off!

Fuck, man, fuck!

You gotta admit, it was pretty fire

the way I put down that oink oink.

A loving relationship is a tree to be tended,

not a flower to be picked.

Whoop, whoop!

What up, Road Kill?

Silas.

Trey, what the fuck are you doing here?

Scarecrow around?

Yeah, but I don't think he wants to see the likes of you.

Look, I know shit's been kind of gnarly

since that Gathering a few years back.

Shit's been fucked thanks to you!

I know alright, I'm here to fix it.

Your fucking funeral.

- Go ahead. - Fucking go in.

Yo, yo, yo, yo.

Whoa, is that a Hanzo?

Yeah, I think so.

Got the gold tip and everything.

You think that's real?

Man...

Thanks again for the milk, baby!

Shit, Juggalos.

Chocolate-covered pretzel?

-No thanks. -Your loss.

Hi.

Hey.

Hey just make sure Scare gets his.

This way, clowns.

Who's she?

That's Eden.

Scarecrow's little sister.

Eden? That's tight.

Knew a chick named Hallelujah once.

I know a girl named Modesty.

She used to show me her tits for Pokemon cards.

Yo!

Eden is so fly, man.

I'd, like, eat a bag of shit just to

buy her tampons.

Hope that happens for you, man.

Thank you.

Hey, Scarecrow?

You'll never guess who's here to see you.

Don't come in!

Man, what the fuck? I said don't come in.

I'm sorry, Scarecrow.

I thought you said come in.

I can't hear from all the bombs and shit.

If you can't hear well,

then close the fucking door you deaf idiot.

Yeah, you deaf idiot!

You shut the fuck up, Fuck Stick!

We gotta get these little legs movin'.

He'll be out in a minute.

It's fine.

Cool.

They had to cut out his butthole--from overuse, right?

Yo, so they couldn't fuck him up the pooper anymore, right?

So they started fucking

the surgical hole in his stomach instead.

They called it a, uh...

-Stoma. -A stoma.

Fucked up, right?

Hey, you think Scarecrow got a stoma?

Why don't you ask him? See what happens?

Scarecrow!

Hey, man, you got a sto--

My ninja! Ha!

Why the fuck you two shit stains

darken my doorstep?

Particularly you... Judas.

You come here to give up a pound of flesh?

Scarecrow, hear a ninja out.

I am sorry we got you kicked out of the Gathering

and had your car taken apart piece by piece.

I am.

Honestly, you know you deserve Juggalo justice, though.

You were stealing.

Allegedly.

Look, bro...

we got in a little trouble with the po-po.

Now, I know you fuckin' hate me.

Don't you hate cops more?

You got all of us

at the Mystic Mississippi Crew

banned from the Gathering for life.

Can you imagine the humiliation of 5,000 Juggalos

screaming, you fucked up!

You fucked up! You fucked up!

My bad.

Still rap?

Hell yeah.

Paint my face, say some dumb shit on the mic.

Take a sucka Juggalo's money.

That's one way to look at it.

So, uh...

you have some trouble with some cops?

Couldn't be avoided.

Mm.

We was down by Penny's Café, you know?

They pulled us over. Motherfucking pig saw my stash.

But I got the jump on him. I gave him some of this.

No way, fuckface!

Yo bruh,

why do we need to bring guns to this conversation?

Everybody chill!

That is a squirt gun.

That right there is some legit LSD.

I got it from Scary Larry, the junkie pioneer.

Treat yourself!

That cop is probably peaking right now.

If he does figure out what dimension he's in, though,

he's gonna be lookin' for the Hatchet Wagon.

Is there any chance we can borrow one of your cars

and leave the van here just--

just 'til after the Gathering?

Pretty please.

Wait a second.

Let me get this straight. Like...

you two goony birds want me

to loan you a non-felonious vehicle

while I babysit your van,

which the cops are actively searching for?

Uh-huh.

I just fail to see how this trade benefits me.

Come on, ninja.

Help a couple fellow Juggalos out, man.

I knew that stupid fucking Juggalo family shit

would come up. Fuck that clown shit!

I'm a business... man.

All right, Scarecrow.

I got some real good shit here.

Some artisanal Molly, free range mushrooms,

small batch cocaine,

and free trade Peruvian hash.

Can we do a deal?

I'll take the whole stash.

I'll keep the van.

And I want you two to come to

a little ceremony we're having later.

Anything to get to the motherfucking Gathering.

If I can look my enemy in the eye

and I don't see myself...

then I understand neither myself nor my enemy.

There goes my goddamn cream dream.

I cannot believe we traded the wagon

for this fucking piece of shit.

It could be worse.

This guy I sell T to...

he offered to be my sex table if I gave him a discount.

What the fuck is a sex table?

Oh, it's where you get down on all fours like a table

and people have sex on top of you.

Don't knock it 'til you try it, boys!

What's up? I'm Trey.

Hi, Eden, like the garden.

What's up with quiet riot over here?

Silas Elton Devereaux.

Please to meet you, my lady.

Oh, Elton, huh?

Hey, don't sleep on Tiny Dancer.

Shit's a fucking certified banger.

Oh, I like Elton John.

But, uh, I hear you two can rap.

You gonna spit some bars for me or what?

I got you.

He gets stage fright sometimes.

Shut up, T-Money.

Just give me a minute.

Okay.

Oh shit, that's pretty good.

I hope I didn't offend you talkin' about you fartin'.

Oh, not at all.

My farts are...

very sexual.

I bet they are.

I'm impressed, homie.

I think there's actually a chance

you won't totally embarrass yourself at the Gathering.

The Gathering?

You ain't never been? We're gonna perform there.

No, some Juggalos are cool, but...

Brian--I mean, Scarecrow-- he just takes that shit too far.

I already live in a violent world.

I ain't tryin' to escape to one too.

Oh, it ain't literal, though.

Songs are just like little mini horror films

set to a dope-ass beat.

Yeah, Juggalos ain't about violence.

It's all about family.

Like, no matter how fucked up your past is,

unconditional acceptance.

Yeah, I hear that, but, you know,

family ain't exactly a good thing for everybody.

So...

this place all yours?

It was my Grammy's, but, uh,

she left it to Brian when she died.

She was mauled to death by a pack of feral wolves.

What?

Yeah, back when this place used to be a plantation,

they would train wild dogs and wolves

to hunt down runaway slaves.

Their descendants are still in these woods.

Bloodlust is, like, in their genes and shit now.

After my dad found our Grammy, never ate sausage again.

Hey, uh, I gotta express myself.

You boys wanna come inside?

Like the NWA song?

The greatest gift you can give yourself

is calm amongst the chaos.

What?

Oh, I'm just... in awe.

Well, fuck off.

I don't like doin' this, but I don't have a choice.

I'm sorry.

One of you guys got a light for me?

What does he do with the milk?

He thinks it's his secret to getting his legs to work again.

He wants to stop eating solid food and only drink my milk.

Idiot.

Plus, he sells it to, like, bodybuilders

and sex freaks and shit.

But every time, I think about Lotus.

Who's Lotus?

Sorry.

Didn't even make it to her first birthday.

Lotus--that's a Juggalo name.

Yeah, her daddy was a Juggalo.

He said the lotus grows in the darkest muck of the swamp.

But when it blossoms,

it's the most beautiful flower in the world.

That's some poetry right there.

So, what's the deal with you and your brother... Brian?

He's overprotective.

But he's the only family I got.

You ever think about leavin'?

Oh, I've tried.

Never turns out well.

He says he needs me, which is kind of sweet

in a twisted sort of way.

Each of these was an escape attempt.

I'm just trying to survive now.

Yo, that's why blood don't always mean family.

Wasn't always like this.

Brian and I used to be best friends before Afghanistan.

He even saved my life once.

Our dad was a DEA agent, always out of town.

One day, he comes home and finds our mother

in bed with his brother.

Full bloodbath.

Shit.

Brian hid us under the trailer

while daddy went full Jack Torrance.

Would've killed us if he could've found us.

Damn.

Thought my family was fucked up.

What's up with your family?

Junkie mom.

Dad... no idea.

Grew up in and out of foster homes

'til I met Silas, his big bro, Magic Mike.

They took me in.

Mike taught us about music.

Taught us how to be men.

Showed us that Juggalo life.

Where's he at now?

He passed.

Car accident.

He was driving Meemaw home from the bar.

When he stopped at a red light, some...

joker came at him with a tire iron and he panicked.

Didn't see the garbage truck coming.

Crushed him like a grape.

Meemaw's still in a...

barely conscious state.

But she... she's gonna wake up.

Soon.

There are a million ways to mourn.

All of them are correct.

Thank you.

It's like life splits into two halves...

before you lose someone you love and after.

-What what? -Hold on, let me get it.

Make a wish and blow.

What did you wish for?

I can't fuckin' tell you.

It wouldn't come true!

I would've wished for a friend like the two of you have.

When you a Juggalo, you got family all over the world.

I like you nerds.

Glad you're staying for the ceremony.

Us too.

You guys wanna fuck?

Uh...

I can't today.

You can tell me if you just think I'm gross.

I just ate, so--

Don't worry about it.

I just wanted to feel loved for a second.

Girl, we love you already.

You're more than just your body.

You're one of us.

You a Juggalo whether you know it or not.

You see this ninja over here?

He just did a year in jail for me.

It's nothin'. Just a little fight.

He stood up for me.

Si, don't.

It's cool, T.

He stomped the fuck out of this frat boy's scrotum.

Dude was comin' at me 'cause I'm trans.

Promised Mike I'd look after you.

That's dope.

You dope.

I showed you my scars. Now show me yours.

Oh, oh, you know about scars?

Oh, okay.

You watch the YouTube--

What's that?

It's like I was born

with my heart outside my body, you know?

'Cause people always be coming for your life.

But... it's cool.

You feel more.

That's sexy.

I'm gonna go.

No, don't.

You're not trying to make me a sex table, are you?

Capture the beauty.

They say love is humanity's most complicated emotion.

That's all bullshit.

In reality, it's the fuckin' simplest.

All expressions of humanity are of the divine.

Whoop, whoop.

How do you like our faces?

They're perfect.

We are no more different from each other

than two fingers on the same hand.

Let's begin the necromancy.

Eden, are you ready?

We are here to contact the spirit of Lotus,

who was taken from us at a very young age.

Eden, what the fuck!?

It's okay, Silas.

Shhh! Don't fuck up my incantation!

Your mother's blood has been shed and consumed.

Lotus, please, speak with us!

How's a baby ghost supposed to communicate?

I know.

Shh!

But she never learned to talk, right?

Shut the fuck up, man!

God!

There's too many distractions.

I just...

we need something more potent.

What if...

What if we consumed a little flesh...

Anything to feel her presence again.

Eden, no!

Don't do it.

I love that pinky.

If Lotus's spirit is gonna join us,

it's because I made a sacrifice.

I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream.

I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream.

I scream, you scream...

Hell yeah, let the healing begin!

Whoa, what the fuck!?

Mm, oh...

You're so...

You're so fuckin' hardcore, Scarecrow...

Did it work?

Is she here?

She's losing too much blood.

We gotta cauterize it!

What?

Didn't you ever see Rambo 3?

Where he put the gunpowder on his stomach

and lit it on fire?

You wanna use my lighter?

Gotta be hotter than that.

I've got a cooking torch in the kitchen.

I know it's in here somewhere. I made crème brulee last week!

You made fuckin' crème brulee...

Yeah, I used breastmilk!

-Ah! Ah! -That's it! Go, go, go, go!

Give me the hatchet.

It better fuckin' work 'cause

we ain't goin' to no goddamn hospital.

Swing, swing, swing.

Chop, chop, chop.

Just do it.

Oh, goddamn dude.

Ain't no thing. I just watch a lot of movies.

It's Lotus!

Momma's here, baby!

Randy! What took you so long?

Randy...

Randy Cox!

What the fuck?

Forgot my name.

We got fuckin' made.

I gotta piss out my dick...

Thank you.

Get the fuck out my way. Piss dick comin' through!

Scarecrow, you sold us out.

I answer to Randy.

I'm a capitalist, bitch.

Shit is beyond your feeble minds.

That's how you treat family, huh?

Pfft!

Shut the fuck up!

Lookin' out for my real family.

Check it out.

She's useless on her own.

I post her ads.

Get her drugs, pay for countless abortions, like... what?

You didn't think you were the first, right?

Shut up!

Why do you wanna leave me?

'Cause you milk me, you sick fuck!

You push everyone I love away.

Was that me? It was loud.

Randy, why the fuck would you do that!?

Do you...

Ever get the urge to do something really crazy!?

I mean, like, uh, you know, when you're drivin' on a bridge

and you think to yourself,

"What if I just jerked this motherfuckin' wheel

and drove this damn thing right off the edge!?"

You ever get that feelin'?

Randy, you need to get that gun out my face.

When my boy Adam was a little, little baby,

I used to wonder,

what if I suffocated him while he slept?

It would've been so easy.

Randy, can you get that fucking gun out of my face

and these fucking clowns out of my hair?

You've got clowns in your hair? Clowns in your hair...

Where? Where?

Whoa... Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Randy? Randy, come on, man.

We both served, remember?

Oorah...

Give into that feeling, Randy.

I wish I could.

But... I pray to a greater god.

Let's go, Juggalos.

Eden, no!

Fuck!

Tell your boss this squares us right?

Bye.

Whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo...

This don't look like no fuckin' police station.

Yeah bro, what the fuck?

I know, I know this is scary.

Hell, I'm even scared.

Why are my hands so fucking sweaty?

Okay, my boy dosed you with acid,

but we don't deserve to fuckin' die, man!

Acid?

That's why I feel like this.

It's real good shit, bro.

Maybe you're even havin' a little bit of fun?

This is supposed to be fun?

Happiness is not always fun.

"Happiness is not always fun."

Damn.

I'm not gonna ever win a rap battle.

I'm not gonna get up on stage at the Gathering.

I'm never gonna eat another banana split.

This is all your fuckin' fault, Silas.

I would've never come to Scarecrow's

if I wasn't trying to protect you!

Whoever asked you to protect me?

Your brother Mike did!

I ain't your little sister, Trey.

I never was.

I just want you to be happy, man.

My happiness isn't your responsibility.

I know.

I guess I just need to be... needed.

We lost a year to that shit.

It don't fuckin' matter.

Nothin' fuckin' matters anymore.

Fuck!

Oh, shit!

It's the sheriff.

The fuck?

Look, Randy!

It's Barnum and fuckin' Bailey.

Hi!

Ow.

What a dark and...

beautiful night.

Huh?

Hey...

Is the sun sleepin'?

Randy, you fuckin' sheep.

Is this who you are?

Just takin' orders?

I'm not normally like this.

Unfortunately...

ya'll witnessed my little mistake here.

She can't help herself.

Ah...

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

I hunted her down once...

-Please, Randy. -You gotta go back.

Ariel? Ariel.

Could've avoided all of this.

Damn it, my dick's gotta piss again!

Mr. Randy, Mr. Randy, please think about Adam.

Would you do this to your boy?

Sweetie.

Happiness is not always fun.

Mm-hmm.

All right, let's do this.

You don't have to do this.

Mm-hmm.

You don't have to do this. We can go back to how it was.

I think we both know that we have

passed the point of no return!

Who are these guys?

Um, these are some Juggalos.

Why are they here?

To take the blame.

Mm.

Hey, hey...

Do you remember when I used to sing you to sleep?

-Stop. -No, no, do you remember?

Huh?

Oh.

Yeah.

Mm-hmm.

Please, stop!

Please stop it. Stop it!

You nightmare maker, stop!

Baby, do you understand what will happen to your daddy

if that baby's born?

Killing the unborn is wrong.

You taught me that.

It's a fuckin' abomination.

In Sunday school, they teach you that all life is precious.

Is that what they teach you at Sunday school?

They teach you at Sunday school

all life is precious?

No, I'm sorry, I'm not laughing at you,

it's just you're so goddamn cute when you're being pious.

Randy, please help me.

Randy, please stop.

Do... do you know who put all the piss in my dick?

Randy, please...

Who put the piss in my dick?

- Please, Randy... - Babe, where did you go?

Where did you go?

Oh, I see you! Oh... I see you!

Please stop.

Peek-a-boo! I'm comin' to get you!

- I'm comin' to get you! - Please stop.

- I'm comin' to get you! - Please help me.

I got you!

Oh, baby, baby...

that child, it ain't ever gonna be born, okay?

I can feel his heartbeat.

He's part of me.

Sweetie...

that thing is gonna ruin both of our lives, all right?

This ends tonight.

Uh, excuse me, Gavin?

Uh, have you ever seen God?

What the fuck is up with you tonight, huh?

Dad...

My eyes are wide open, that's what's up!

-Shh! -Please!

Please don't hurt me, Dad. Please don't hurt me.

-No, no, no, sweetie. -Please don't hurt--

Look at me. Look at me.

I'm not gonna hurt you.

These losers are.

Like fuckin' hell we are.

Let her go, asshole!

Hey, shh, shh, shh...

Hey... I see God right now.

He's right over there!

And he's wearin' clown paint.

That's the Dark Carnival, Randy.

You believe!

Oh fuck, it's coming!

Hey, we're gonna hurry!

We better hurry!

Dad...

Baby!

Let's just kill it, okay?

And then everything can go back to normal.

Just be just like it was, all right?

We can blame it on these two fuckin' losers.

Dad...

Remember when I told you you'd regret runnin' into me?

Now it looks like I'm the ringmaster

of your fuckin' circus, boy.

-Huh? Do-do--

-Fuckin' asshole! -Back up!

Back the fuck up!

Sit down!

Sit the fuck down!

Just get over it!

It's meat, okay? It's just fuckin' meat!

I don't wanna be a part of your family anymore.

Quit your whining!

If you just scraped it out like I fuckin' told you to,

we wouldn't be sitting here right now, so shut the fuck up!

Randy! The carnival is always watching.

Happiness is not always fun.

Gavin!

Really, Randy?

It is time to stop hurting things.

Lower... your sidearm, Randall.

Put that fucking gun down.

Randy?

Randy...

I should not be standing on this grass right now.

Do you know how much grass I have killed

in my whole life?

It's coming!

I've seen the light!

Now it's dark.

No...

No, no, no...

Fuck...

I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream.

I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream...

Shut up!

Fuckin' shut it! Shut it!

I'll blow your fuckin' head off!

-Shut up or I'll-- -Dad!

Oh! Oh, my fucking shirt.

Oh, fuck, fuck.

Fucking hell.

No, no.

She's gone, man.

Shit, girl.

That sucks.

Yo!

Maybe that baby's still alive in there, right?

I like that.

What the fuck are you doing?

You ain't never seen Mr. Wizard?

I'm sterilizing the blade.

No, I was a Bill Nye guy.

What are you gonna do with it?

Peep the technique.

Girl, I'm sorry,

but I know this is what you would've wanted.

Oh fuck no, man.

Ugh...

Oh...

Blood is sticky, yo.

Ugh, fuck!

Where you at?

Where you at, lil' ninja?

Oh, I got him

Oh my fucking God...

Oh...

I think he's dead.

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

Gotta clear the mouth.

Oh, come on, buddy.

Come on, buddy. Come on, buddy.

Oh, he ain't breathin'.

Turn him over. Turn him over.

Ooh, come on, buddy.

Oh, Trey!

We're fuckin' heroes!

Holy fuck.

He's our family now.

We're gonna take good care of him for you.

I'm gonna call him...

Lil' Dirty Bastard.

Get it?

Yeah, I get it.

Hold him, hold him, hold him.

Okay, hold him up, hold him up.

Hold him up, hold him up.

Come here, buddy.

Okay, okay.

Nice and tight, that's it, buddy.

Okay, okay.

I got him, I got him.

Come here, buddy.

Hey, hey...

Oh my god.

Yo, Trey...

I'm mad bummed about all this death and shit...

but this is a Dark Carnival miracle.

The miracle of life is some dank-ass shit, huh?

You like that, buddy?

I think that fuckin' ceremony worked.

We're comin', Eden.

You look dangerous as hell, ninja.

Finally, the street cred I've been waitin' for.

What the fuck does "less lethal" even mean?

How can you be less dead?

I know, right?

Death is way less cool than they make it sound in rap songs.

Yo, I've been thinkin' about our name.

The Blood Wolf Clan.

You Timber Trey...

and I'm Silas the Lycan.

What you think?

I think it's fresh as fuck.

Yo, you cryin', homie?

It's been a stressful day, man.

Family.

Family.

Family.

Family.

Be what you wanna be.

Act how you wanna act.

Love who you wanna love.

Dance how you wanna dance.

Do what you wanna do.

Fuck you if you don't like it.

We are fucking Juggalos.

What the fuck are you, juffalo soldier?

Can you please send Eden outside?

I think she would like to come with us to the Gathering.

No.

Don't you think that should be her decision?

Well?

Guess it's time for Plan B.

Who wants a taste of my taser sword?

Oh!

Shotgun!

Stop, stop, stop!

Stop! Stop! Aah!

Aah!

You ain't got a dog in this fight, Silas.

This is family shit.

You better believe it is!

-Silas! -Shut up!

Oh, fuck!

You fucked up.

No, you fucked up!

Aah!

Eden.

Eden come on...

You only hurt the ones you love.

You mean the ones you pity?

Eden!

What am I gonna do?

You're the only thing I've got!

Please!

I'm not a thing, and you haven't got me.

At least not anymore.

I'm your blood.

I'm your family.

You're not my family.

And you ain't a fuckin' Juggalo.

Eden... come on.

What are you doing...

Drink up...

baby bitch.

Aaah!

That's some poetry right there.

You okay?

In the laws of the jungle,

the real strength of the wolf is not its claws

or its teeth or its hunting prowess.

The strength of the pack is the wolf,

and the strength of the wolf is the pack.

That'll be 17 dollars.

Baby, are you okay?

Best day of my life.

'Cause you look like dog shit.

We down with the clown 'til we dead in the ground.

Huh?

Carnival provides.

Baby, you're not makin' any sense.

Thank you.

I do prefer nonsense.

You're a beautiful person.

There is not an imperfect soul among us.

Blood Wolf Clan.

How fresh is that?

Blood Wolf Clan is for the children.

Street cred, homie.

I love you, bro.

I love you too, ninja.

We all think we deserve grace.

But how many us show compassion to those around us?

The unfortunate.

The ugly.

The poor.

The gross.

Blood may be thicker than water...

but it ain't shit compared to the bond of Juggalo family.

Oh shit!

Oh shit!

It's the dogs!

Juggalos show each other mercy.

They forgive.

They accept.

This is the misunderstood pack that I choose.

I choose the light.

Wow... that was fuckin' beautiful, man.

Ready to get up onstage and wild the fuck out?

Hell yeah, ninja.

Annihilate that motherfucker.

Better give me a copy of that demo.

You go, I'll follow.

Road Warriors, dude.

Let's tag team this shit.

You nerds are gonna be great.

Matter of fact...

I need my fam up there with me.

Let's fucking go!

Family!

Family!

Family! Family!

Family!

Whoop, whoop, motherfucker.

Whoop, whoop.