Original subtitles

THEME SONG: Here we go.

We're getting on the road 'till we stop,

and then we'll shop.

So one, two, three, now baby, here we go.

Here we go.

Here we go on a mission, under-cover,

and we're in control.

Here we go.

Here we go.

We're Totally Spies, so get on with the show.

Here we go.

Here we go.

Here we go.

[alarm sounds]

-[gasp]

Ah!

-Huh?

-I am so stoked for our triple date.

Thanks so much for agreeing to do this, girls.

-Uh, we didn't agree, Clover.

-Yeah, you're forcing us, remember?

-Fine.

But that's 'cause I've been waiting to go out with

quarterback cutie Duncan Markus since the eighth grade.

And just think, if Duncan's brothers are as good looking

as he is, we all win.

-[gasp]

-Brothers?

-I thought we were being set up with Duncan's friends.

-His brothers are his friends.

They're, like, a totally close-knit family.

-Yo, Clover, heads up.

-Ah!

Huh?

Hi, Duncan.

These are the friends I was telling you

about, Sam and Alex.

-What's up?

-Hey.

-How's it going?

-These are my bros, Drew and Markus.

-[gasp]

-[gasp]

-So, are you psyched to see this righteous

football movie, Alex?

-I was.

Now I'm more interested in seeing a doctor.

-Ha.

[snort]

You're funny.

-Actually, I wasn't joking.

-Ha.

-How come I've never seen you around Beverly High, Markus?

-Because I don't go to high school.

I'm still in junior high.

-You'll have plenty of time to get acquainted later, girls.

Right now we have a righteous football movie to see.

-Grrr.

[cell phone rings]

-Huh?

-Ah, saved by the bell.

Um, we'll meet you inside the theatre.

[cell phone rings]

-Chicks--

always got to do stuff together.

-Good evening, ladies.

-What do you got, Jer?

JERRY (ON DEVICE): A break-in at the Internal Office of

Information.

-We can be there in two minutes.

-Hurry, girls.

National security could be at stake.

-97 floors?

We're never going to find this guy.

-According to the security mainframe, the break-in was on

the 89th floor.

-Ooh, nice work, Sammy.

We can nab our intruder and be back to the theater before the

opening credits.

Huh?

-We can't take the elevator, Clover.

He'll know we're coming.

-Alex is right.

We have to take the stairs.

-[sigh]

Did I say opening credits?

We'll be lucky to make it back before the next showing.

-(PANTING) Next time we leap a tall building in a single

bound, remind me to go with the sensible shoes.

-Apparently, we're not the only ones who had trouble on

the stairs.

-Well, other than having a nasty headache, he should be

just fine when he wakes up.

-Groovy.

Now, could we please find our bad guy and

get back to the movie?

[explosion]

-Ah!

-Be careful what you wish for.

-Let's get him, girls.

ALEX (OFFSCREEN): That's one way to get security clearance.

-There he is.

-[gasp].

-[gasp].

-The loser that's ruining my date, and he's got some kind

of microfilm canister thingy.

[weapon charging]

-Ah!

-Ooh, this guy means business.

ALEX (OFFSCREEN): Where'd he go?

-Ah!

-[gasp]

-Oof!

Ah!

-How could you let him get away?

-Actually, it was pretty easy.

-Let's double back.

If we hurry, we can head him off at the pass.

[elevator beeping]

[ding]

-Bingo, we've got him.

Yah!

-Huh?

-Freaky.

He, like, totally disappeared.

-He didn't disappear, Alex.

He outsmarted us.

-Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.

-[gasp]

-Great, we're trapped like rats in a cage.

-Have a nice ride, ladies.

[screams]

-Aw.

[creaks of metal]

-What was that about being safe, Sam?

-Now is not the time for sarcasm, Clover.

-According to that thing, we're stuck on the 75th floor.

-Not for long.

Alex, hop up on my shoulders and try the hatch.

-Oof.

It's no use.

It's jammed.

-Huh?

Terrific.

It's bad enough that WOOHP destroyed my date.

Now they're going to be responsible for destroying me.

-OK, no, Clover.

We are going to find a way out of this.

-Before or after we run out of air?

-[sigh]

[creaking metal]

-If only we had a way to contact Jerry, then maybe he

could WOOHP us out of here.

-Are you serious?

-Huh?

-I mean, just think about our WOOHPing

experiences for a second.

ALEX (OFFSCREEN): Don't remind me.

-Whoa!

-Whoa!

-Whoa!

Oof!

CLOVER (OFFSCREEN): One butt WOOHP, coming right up.

ALEX (OFFSCREEN): I hate it when that happens.

-Oof.

-Heh heh.

-Oh!

-Ahh!

-Oh!

-Ta-ta, girls.

ALEX (OFFSCREEN): Whoa, Jerry!

-Oof.

-Ugh.

-Ahh!

Oh!

Oof.

CLOVER (OFFSCREEN): That was the worst.

-Whoa.

CLOVER (OFFSCREEN): Whatever.

-[giggle]

-Ahh!

Whoa!

Whoa.

Ahh!

Whoa!

[screams]

Cheese.

Ahh!

Whoa!

Ahh!

JERRY (OFFSCREEN): Hello.

-Ahh!

Oof.

-Ow, that hurt.

-Ahh!

Whoa!

Oof.

-Man, talk about pathetic.

Pfft.

[laughter]

-Ahh!

-Huh?

-Oh!

-Oof.

[screams]

-My butt is still sore.

Would it kill Jer to buy us a cushy landing pad?

So, thanks but no thanks.

I'll take my chances in this grody elevator.

-There's got to be some kind of gadget in here.

You know, a stick of exploding gum or a laser lipstick or an

eyelash curler catapult.

-In case you've forgotten, Sam, the majority of our

gadget experiences haven't exactly

been successful either.

SAM (OFFSCREEN): Ugh, I was trying to forget about that.

-[gasp]

Ahh.

Oof.

CLOVER (OFFSCREEN): I can't believe you did that.

ALEX

(OFFSCREEN): Whatever [scream]

-Err, argh.

Oh!

-We can't get any traction.

Oof.

-(PANTING) Ah!

Oh, oh.

-Whoa!

-Whoa, aah!

SAM (OFFSCREEN): That was the worst.

-Oh, just thinking about it makes me nauseous.

[creaking metal]

-True.

But gadgets have saved our butts on

more than one occasion.

[electronic beeps]

[electronic beeps]

-Ahh!

Whoa!

-Hiah!

-Yah!

-Cool!

-Ah!

-Urgh.

-Mmm.

-Anti-gravity cycle.

CLOVER (OFFSCREEN): Oof, close one.

-Wow.

ALEX (OFFSCREEN): You can mess with me, but you better not

mess with my hair.

[giggles]

-Whoa!

CLOVER (OFFSCREEN): Aha, fashionable and functional.

Cool.

Yeah.

Ah!

Never underestimate the power of a good accessory.

-Yeah.

-See, it isn't all that bad.

[creaking metal]

-Whatever.

All I know is if it wasn't for stupid WOOHP, we'd never be in

this situation.

We'd be at the mall with cute boys where we belong.

-Yeah, but if it wasn't for stupid WOOHP, you never know

would have met some of the cutest boys of all.

-Aah!

-I'm Rock.

-Aw.

ALEX AND SAM (OFFSCREEN): Whoa.

[giggles]

CLOVER (OFFSCREEN): Oh, that one was

definitely hunk material.

[giggles]

[scream]

ALEX (OFFSCREEN): Oh, please.

[giggles]

-Oof.

CLOVER (OFFSCREEN): It's not my fault guys can't help

themselves around me.

-You've got to be kidding.

-I'll give you that one, Alex.

-And don't forget about all the cool

places we get to visit.

It makes our job seem almost like a vacation.

[music playing]

-OK, fine.

Maybe being a spy isn't all bad.

[creaking metal]

[creaking metal]

-Careful not to make any more sudden movements.

We don't want the elevator to fall again.

[snap]

[gasp]

[snap]

[gasp]

[screams]

[screeching metal]

-It's official--

this is a total nightmare.

In fact, it's even worse than Alex's driving.

-Sorry.

Ahh.

Oh!

Ahh!

Whoa.

Yeh-- whoa!

Woo hoo!

-Ahh!

ALEX (OFFSCREEN): That went well.

CLOVER (OFFSCREEN): As if.

[screams]

-Whoa.

Aah!

-Whoa!

-Ahh!

-Whoa!

[horn honking]

[screams]

SAM (OFFSCREEN): I can't believe you did that?

[laughter]

ALEX (OFFSCREEN): Whew, close one.

-Well, maybe not worse.

-Uh.

I'll have you know that I've driven my car for a whole week

without getting a single scratch on it.

-Well, give yourself a gold star.

-I already did.

-Huh?

-Look, the only way we're ever going to get out of this jam

is if Sam uses her smarts.

-Clover, please, I'm not that smart.

CLOVER (OFFSCREEN): Reality check.

You're, like, always getting us out of

sticky situations, Sam.

SAM (OFFSCREEN): Oof.

Argh.

Clover, no.

It could be a trap.

[beeps]

-It's a bomb.

-Correction--

a temperature-sensitive bomb.

Let's see.

Quick, tie your belts around one corner.

-Oof!

Ahh!

-Activate it and follow my lead.

One, two, three.

-Oof!

SAM (OFFSCREEN): Quick, everybody lift your chains.

Now roll before it swings back.

-Ah!

-Oh!

CLOVER (OFFSCREEN): You go, girl.

SAM (OFFSCREEN): Yes.

-Hiah!

-Oof.

-Ahh!

-Ahh!

Help me!

Ahh!

-Whoa!

Whoa!

Whoa!

-You've got an answer for everything.

-I guess I do figure a lot of stuff out.

-Yeah, it sort of makes up for that annoying know-it-all

mentality of yours.

-Uh!

-Uh, I'm sure she means that in the best way possible.

Actually, I think the lack of oxygen is

getting to her brain.

-I suppose I could try and do something with the electronics

of the elevator.

-Go for it.

-Ah!

-Watch it.

-Apparently, this is one bad guy we aren't going

to be able to defeat.

-Are you kidding?

-We've beaten much worse baddies

than this dumb elevator.

[gasp]

ALEX (OFFSCREEN): That one still gives me the shivers.

-Oh!

Ah!

-Ahh!

-Eliminate them all!

-Uh!

CLOVER (OFFSCREEN): What a freak.

-Uh!

Ahh!

Uh!

-Oof!

Hup, ah!

-Oof!

-Ahh!

-Yah!

Oof, ugh!

Ha!

-Oof!

Ah!

Hiah!

-Hup!

Ah!

-Ah!

SAM (OFFSCREEN): I hope we've seen the last of those creeps.

-Ugh, ah!

SAM (OFFSCREEN): Mental note to self--

never go into Jerry's body again.

-Ahh!

CLOVER (OFFSCREEN): Don't remind me.

-Ahh!

ALEX (OFFSCREEN): Can we please change the subject?

-Ah-- ah-- achoo!

-Ugh!

[giggles]

CLOVER (OFFSCREEN): OK, remind me why we're spies, again?

ALEX (OFFSCREEN): Don't remind me.

-Ahh!

-Whoa-- whoa!

Oof.

Ow!

-[gasp]

Hey.

ALEX (OFFSCREEN): What a weirdo.

-Oof!

-Ah!

CLOVER (OFFSCREEN): What a loser.

[scoff]

Rude much?

-Hup.

-Yah!

[gunshots]

[gasp]

-Hold it right there.

SAM (OFFSCREEN): He takes weirdo to a whole new level.

[gasp]

[boom]

-Hey, stop them.

-Oof!

-Ugh.

Oof.

[scream]

-Wah!

-Ah!

-Ah!

Ha!

-Oof!

Oof!

Ah!

-Ah!

Ah!

-Aren't there any normal villains out there?

-If you're trying to cheer us up, you're going about it all

the wrong way.

-Tell me about it.

Reminiscing about our missions only makes me realize how much

I hate WOOHP and how being a spy has ruined my life.

-I have to agree.

I don't think our lives could get any worse.

[zap]

ALEX (OFFSCREEN): Don't be so sure about that.

-[gasp]

-[gasp]

-The elevator roof is on fire.

-Alex, what are you doing?

-Wah!

[creaking metal]

ALEX, SAM, AND CLOVER (OFFSCREEN): [coughs]

Ah!

Whoa!

[screams]

[elevator beeping]

ALEX (OFFSCREEN): We'd better do something fast, or in a few

seconds, we're going to be flat as pancakes.

-Well, I guess this is goodbye.

It's been great knowing you girls.

[elevator beeps faster]

ALEX (OFFSCREEN): I'm really going to miss you guys.

-I am so sorry I've been so cranky.

You two are my best friends in the whole wide world.

[elevator beeps frantically]

[screeching metal]

[poof]

[hiss]

-Hey, that wasn't bad at all.

-Yeah, I though it would hurt a lot worse.

SAM (OFFSCREEN): That's because we didn't crash.

We're alive.

[cheers]

-Hello, girls.

-Jerry?

-You saved our lives, Jer.

Thank you.

Thank you, thank you.

-You're very welcome, Clover.

Well, don't thank me, ladies.

Thank WOOHP's newest gadget, REAM--

Rapidly Expanding Absorbent Mousse.

-You know something, girls?

For all our complaining about WOOHP, there is one thing I

remember liking about being a spy.

-What's that?

-Jerry

-Yeah, you're right.

-Ahem.

Mmm, yes.

Thank you, girls.

Now why don't you run along and get back to your dates?

-But what about the intruder?

-Oh, we captured him--

-Huh?

---a few blocks from here with this nasty little molecular

melting gun.

The suction cups on his feet made him

quite easy to apprehend.

-Cool.

In that case, come on girls.

I've got a quarterback to smooch.

-Oh, darn.

Looks like we're too late.

The movie just ended.

-Oh, no.

Uh, there they are.

Quick, we have to think up an excuse.

Duncan, this is so unbelievable.

-I feel the same way, Clover.

This has been the best date ever.

I mean, you know, talk about a great movie.

I never felt, like, so many emotions before--

joy and sadness.

-Shin splints.

-And hunger.

Heh.

Let's get some pizza.

-Great idea, little brother.

Let's go.

-Ah, this is great.

They never even knew we were gone.

[gasp]

Hey, wait a second.

How dare he not notice I wasn't there.

That's it.

We're breaking up.

Ah!

-Ow!

-Well, at least this gets us off the hook.

-Totally.

Want to go see a movie?

-As long as I don't have to get into an

elevator, I'm there.

[laughter]