All language subtitles for The.Shape.of.Things.2003.PROPER.1080p.WEBRip.x264-RARBG

[TONE SOUNDING]

[WOMAN]
We would like to remind
our visitors today...

that the documentary film
on the works of Alex Katz...

will begin in 10 minutes
in the Brunnell Theater.

[DOOR OPENS, CLOSES]

[FOOTSTEPS]

[SPRAY CAN RATTLING]

Support us and become VIP member
to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org

♪♪

[MAN]
♪ I won't walk
with my head bowed ♪

♪ Be on caution
where lovers walk ♪

♪ Your love walks
where three's a crowd ♪

♪ Be on caution
where lovers walk ♪

♪ Lovers walk
Lovers scramble ♪

♪ Be on caution
where lovers walk ♪

♪ Lovers step
shuffle and gamble ♪

♪ Be on caution
where lovers walk ♪

♪ Lovers trip
Lovers stumble ♪

♪ Lovers dip
Lovers fumble ♪

♪ Lovers live
where love has crumbled ♪

♪ Be on caution
where lovers walk ♪

♪ Lovers strut
Lovers stroll ♪

♪ Lovers leap ♪

♪ Lovers late
Lovers wait ♪

[CONTINUES ON HEADSET]
♪ Making promises
that they can't keep ♪

♪ Lovers link up
arm in arm ♪

♪ Lovers slink up
Lovers charm ♪

♪ Lovers drink up
and come to harm ♪

♪ Be on caution
where lovers walk ♪

♪ Love is gone
and it's no one's fault ♪

♪ Lovers stop here
Lovers halt ♪

♪ Lovers don't walk
Lovers run ♪

♪ Will you look
what love has done ♪

♪ Will you look
what love has done ♪

♪ Will you look
what love has done ♪

♪ Be on caution
where lovers walk ♪

♪♪ [CONTINUES]

♪ Now love's limpin'
on a lovers crutch ♪

♪ Lookin' for a hand
with a personal touch ♪

♪ Be on caution
where lovers walk ♪

♪♪ [CONTINUES]

You stepped over the line.

♪ Be on caution
where lovers walk ♪♪

Huh?
You stepped over the line,
miss.

Uh, it's Ms.

♪♪ [OFF]

Sorry, Ms., but, um...

I meant to.

You're not
supposed to do that.
Or the photos.

That's why
I tried it.
Why?

To see what would happen.

Well, uh,

I mean, I'm what happens.

I-I ha... I have to walk over,
like I've done, and ask you
to take a step back.

And if someone doesn't,
what then?

I'm not sure.

I've never had anyone
not step back.

I've only said it, like, four times,
and every time they've done it.

What if I'm your first?
Non-stepper, I mean. Then what?

Look, I'm off in 10 minutes.
I'd probably just stand here,
make sure you didn't touch anything.

Really?
Pretty much.

Yeah... No, I'd let
the next shift talk to you,
kick you out, or whatever.

You wouldn't grab me
or anything?

You're not gonna mess up
my weekend with this,
are you?

I wasn't planning on it,
but I'm not completely
against it either.

See, if you get all crazy,
then I gotta write up
a report and stuff.

I'm here till 5:00, 5:30 easy,
and I have a second job
to get to... the video store.

Oh, that's where I...

I've seen you in there.
You helped me once, I think.

Yeah? With what?

The Picture of Dorian Gray.

You found it in "Drama,"
not "Classics."

Right!
I remember that!

Somebody misplaced it.
Yes!
Yeah, behind Cabaret.

Mmm.
That's funny.

Anyway, you helped me.
That was... nice.

Thanks.

But you're not gonna
return the favor, right?

You mean, step back over...

No, I-I'm... I'm sorry.
I can't.
Why is that?

It's a pretty good-sized
sculpture.

You could see it
just fine from here.

Truthfully?
I'm gonna deface the statue.

Oh.
Uh, is that paint?

Yes, it is.
Great.

Hey, uh, paint's
not really a great thing
to bring into a museum.

[CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY]
Why do you have that?

I'm gonna do something
to the nude.
What, like, color it?

I'm thinking more of
painting a big dick on it.
Oh.

And would "Why?" be completely
out of the question here?

- Because I don't like art
that isn't true.
- True?

This sculpture,
it's fake, it's not real.

Therefore, false art.

No, it's a Fornicelli.

It definitely is.
I read the little thingie there
one time.

Yes, but the leaf isn't.
It's not?

Well, what is it?
A pastie or something,
like strippers have?

It's plaster...

that was added by
a committee who had complaints
from local townspeople.

Really?
I didn't know that.

They took issue with his thing...
you know, the shape of it.

Said it was too lifelike.

It's supposed to be God.
You know, that's what
pisses them off.

Look.

See, it's right behind
the leaf there.

You can just see his...

[MAN]
Twig.
[BOTH CHUCKLE]

Yeah, but they didn't
even cover it properly.
It's shoddy craftsmanship.

I mean, if you're gonna do it,
at least do it...
Exactly. Do it right.

[ELEVATOR BELL DINGS]

So, you're a student, then,
or is this just basic anarchy?

Student.
Me too.

What's your emphasis?
Taking out school loans,
mostly.

But I do sit in on
a few English classes.

You're in art?
Mm-hmm. MFA.

Oh.
Applied Theory and Crit.

So, is this, like, a project,
then, or...

No, I am just getting started
on my thesis project now.

It's a big sort of
installation... thingie.

[CHUCKLES]
That's a good word, huh?
"Thingie."

It is.

Anyway, this is just...
an idea I had.

You're cute.

I don't like your hair.

Thanks... I think.

No, you're definitely cute,
but you should...

you should do
something with it,
your hair.

Okay.
I-I'll try that.

[EXHALES]

Your relief's late.
Yeah. Typical.

Yeah, so do you have to
stay at your station
until they spell you, or...

Oh, no, no. At punch-out time
I'm supposed to
get down there and do it.

They can really be pricks
about that.

Oh, you should go, then.

[MUTTERS]
Yeah.

Can I call you?

What do you want to call me?

Um... just up...
[VELVET ROPE CLANKS]

for right now.

I mean, talk.
Maybe get crazy.

Um, take you to dinner?

Okay.

Uh, sure.

Do they... allow you
to do that here?

What, eat dinner?

I meant, hit on the patrons.
Uh, no.

They've got a pretty strict policy
about that too actually.

But...
Ah. The great equalizer.

"But."
[GIGGLES]
Exactly.

I'll take the risk.
Good answer, Grasshopper.

What?

Kung Fu. On TV?

Remember when he was a kid,
there was an old guy
with fakey contact lenses...

Right!

[IMITATES CHINESE ACCENT]
Grasshopper.
[CHUCKLES]

I don't really watch
much television.

Yeah.

So, do you want a number?

Hmm? Oh, God.
Absolutely.

Oh, dang it.
I don't have a pen.

Me either.

Here.
What?

Give me the jacket.

Hmm? Oh.

Uh... Uh...
That's my own.

That's not
part of the uniform.
That's mine.

Good. Now you'll
always have it on you.

[MUTTERS]
6-3-0...

Great.

Yeah.

- So, I'll call you?
- Yeah.

It was nice
to meet you... again.

You too.

[CHATTERING]

You can definitely tell.
You can.

- Really.
- I bet your friends
say something.

Twenty bucks.

[SILENT STAMMERING]
Okay.

- I mean, I can't tell, so I figured...
- That's because you see you every day,
shower, getting dressed...

- So do you.
- I don't see you shower
or getting dressed.

I meant every day.
So far, anyways.

I know. I'm kidding.
Oh.

[CHUCKLES]

[BELL TOLLING MELODY]

[BELL TOLLS TWICE]

I'd like that, though,

if... you would.

What?

Showering and...
getting dressed, you know...

Both, if you want.

Either. Anything.
Any moment I can get with you.

That's what I'd like.

Ask and you shall receive.

So I'm asking, then.
[LAUGHS]

So you shall be receiving, then.

PDA.
What?

Public display of affection.
Oh.

I'm not used to that.
No?

I don't mind.
Really?

Nah.
Whose business is it?
Ours, right?

Kiss if we want to.
Make love in a bathroom stall.
Who cares?

I'd start with
the administration.

Why should they?
We're two adults.
We know what we're doing.

I think this is a bigger discussion
than before Jenny and Philip get here.

Whatever.
Oh, no, I mean...

I'd love to have it with you...
uh, the discussion.

And I agree... somewhat.
I understand.

No, another time
we'll definitely discuss it.

"Another time."

I'd rather do it.

[LAUGHING]

We'll, let me go
check the men's room.
[LAUGHS]

You amaze me.

And you amaze me.

You do. Look at you.

It's just a little jogging.

I'm very proud of you.

Thank you...

[COCKNEY ACCENT]
Henry Higgins.

What's that?
That's from a book.

Well, it's a play actually.

Not the one we're seeing,
though, is it?

No, we're... seeing Medea.
Oh, yeah, right.

I read this as an undergrad.
I like it.

Should I be nervous?
No, not too much.

I mean, unless we have kids.

Now, what about you?

What about me?

I don't know
anything about you.
Yes, you do.

I don't. Not really.

- Where am I from?
- Illinois, near Chicago.

- Sign.
- Gemini, I think.

- The twins, yes.
- Does that mean that you have
a split personality?

No, it means
I was born in June.
Ah. Okay.

Anything else you wanna know?

Why do you like me?

- What?
- Why would you like me?

I'm not anything. I mean...

Don't do that, okay?
That's the only thing about you
I don't like.

What you see in yourself
or don't see.

[SIGHS]
Fuckin' insecurities.

Sorry.

Do you like me?
Of course.

And do I appear
to like you? Huh?
Yeah.

I mean,
it seems like it, yes.
I do like you.

Do I seem to know
my own mind?
No question.

So don't you trust me, then,
to know how I feel?
Yeah... No, you're right...

I mean,
don't worry about "why..."

when... "what"
is right in front of you.

Those are very wise words...

from someone
with such a great ass.

Kiss me...

Grasshopper.

[WOMAN]
Ah-ah-ah!

PDA.
[GIGGLING]

I don't think anybody wants
to watch you kiss, Adam.

[CHUCKLING]

Hi, guys.

Hey, Phil.
Hello.

Hi.
Hey!

Evelyn, this is Philip.

Hello.
Hi.

And his fiancée, Jenny.

Hi.
Hey.

So, should we grab our tickets?

Adam, what's up with you?

Did you lose weight?

Um... a little,
maybe.

No, it's...
He cut his hair or something.

That's it, right?
Right.

Yeah, well, uh, both, sort of.

Huh.

Okay, so, let's, uh...
Come on.

Oh.
[SNAPS FINGERS]

♪♪ [ROCK]
Come on.

♪♪ [CONTINUES]

♪♪

♪♪ [CONTINUES,
VOLUME LOWERING]

[ADAM CHUCKLES]

So tell me this again.
You guys are gonna...
Underwater.

We're gonna get married
underwater.

You gotta be kidding me.
Like in those Life magazine
photos you see, or whatever.

Is that, like,
a... California thing?

No. We wanted
to try something bold.

That oughta do it.
[ADAM]
That is crazy. Really.

So if we want to attend,
we have to...

[PHILIP]
Get in the tank with us.
You bet.

- No. Honey, I thought
we said the guests...
- Uh, we haven't...

[LAUGHS]
We haven't settled
that part completely.

That is nuts.
No, I applaud you.
I think it is very bold.

Yeah, well,
don't expect my buddy here
to follow in our footsteps.

He's the least adventurous
person I know.
[EVELYN] Really?

Absolutely.
Oh, and the marriage thing?

Uh-uh.
It's not gonna happen. Sorry.
[GASPS, LAUGHS]

I don't know how many nights
I listened to this guy say,

"Not me, man.
I'm never gettin' hooked.
No way, man."

Well, well!
Listen, don't encourage him.

My roomie doesn't need
any more encouragement.

Former roommate.

You're gonna look stupid
in one of those wet suits.

- [JENNY LAUGHS]
- Hey, let's not be
a party pooper, my friend.

This could have been yours.

[PHILIP CHORTLES]
Oh, Phil, stop being...

Adam and I had a class together,
and he never got up the nerve
to ask me out.

I'm borrowing his pen,
like, all the time...
hint, hint...

and he's this total monk
the whole semester.

Anyway, Phil picks him up
from class one day, sees me,

and we went to mini-golf
that same night.

I cannot tell a lie.
I got the moves,
God help me.

Whoo!
God help all of us.

Well, like I said,
I think it's great.

It's really amazing... it is...

to find anybody willing
to take a risk these days,

to look a little silly
or different or anything.

Bravo.
To people with balls.

To balls.
Long may they wave.

I'll tell you
what took some balls.

That museum thing
a few weeks back,
with the balls.

Did you guys read about that?

Oh, Adam, of course you did.
You were supposed
to be guarding it.

But, uh...
Evelyn, did you hear
about it?

- [WHISPERS] The penis.
- [WHISPERS] Yes, I did.

Why are we whispering?

Because you don't say "penis"
in Jenny's house.

But we're at my place now,
so we sing it from the eaves.

♪ Penis, penis ♪

Bar's closed.
Last call.

- ♪ Penis, penis ♪
- Nice.

Seriously, though,
can you believe that shit?

Somebody with the gall to pull
that kind of bullshit on our campus?
Fuckin' burns me up.

Shh.
[EVELYN]
I'm an artist, so...

Maybe we should...
I don't really have
the same reaction as...

I mean, this isn't Berkeley.
What does that mean anyway...
"I'm an artist"?

Mmm, nothing.

It means nothing really.

Just that
I understand the impulse.

You what?
Um, Evelyn,
we should probably...

No, no. Wait, Adam.
I wanna hear.

What impulse?
It's called vandalism.

Uh, does anybody
want dessert?
Hold on.

This is rich. Go ahead.

Just that, um, I don't think
it was just kids playing.

I think it was
a sort of statement, a kind of...

- Statement?
- Yeah, I do.

What kind of statement
would that be?
It was pornography.

- Oh, no, it wasn't.
- Yes, it was.

No. Pornography is meant
to titillate, to excite you.

- Did you see a picture of what happened?
- [PHILIP] We did, yeah.

And does a penis excite you?

I mean, just any old penis?

Uh, you're funny,
and that's not the point.

It's totally the point!

How about you, Jenn?
Did you like what you saw?
Did it get you hot?

This is, like,
uncalled for, okay?

- All she said was...
- I know what she said.
Why don't you let her speak?

Did you wanna say
anything else? Huh?

Okay.

Then, look, all I'm...
I'm saying is that,
in my opinion,

it wasn't pornography,
it was a statement.

Wow.
The postgraduate mind at work.

[CLEARS THROAT]
You know, I still don't see
how that makes it a statement.

- What do you mean?
- It's graffiti.

It would be a huge statement,
especially for a town like this.

Which "Take Back the Night" rally
did you find her at, Adam?

You're really
the obnoxious type.
You know that?

I mean, how long did you
have to stomach this guy?
Evelyn...

Anyhow, who knows what
the person was saying by it.
We don't.

But I think it was a gesture,
a kind of manifesto, if you will...

W-W-Wait.
I don't think a person's dick
can be a manifesto. Uh-uh.

You can write a manifesto
on your thing,

but your thing can't be one.

[NERVOUS CHUCKLE]

I'm sure I read that somewhere.
See, you're just
trying to be really...

Hey, I'm not trying to be anything.
Who the hell do you think you are?

A few double dates,
and telling me anything
about who I am.

- Un-fucking-believable!
- Okay, this is getting a little...

Adam,
you can really pick 'em.
Let's just forget the whole...

You are not gonna take
his side in this, are you?
No.

Jesus!
I'm just trying to get out of here
with a touch of dignity.

I've got a test tomorrow
anyway.
"Statement."

Just shut the fuck up!

Fuck right off.

How would you know?

I think she was making one.
So, that's my opinion.

[PURSE, COAT RUSTLING]

Jenny, thanks for everything.

Yeah, how'd you know
it was a girl?

I don't.
I just said.

It's a guess...
what it was,
where it was placed.

An educated guess.

Oh, you're not...

She's not trying to take a poke
at my being an undergrad, is she?

Okay, can we just
stop this now, please?
Adam, tell me she didn't just...

Hey, artiste,
how did you know it was a woman
who painted the cock?

Very, very suspicious there.

You're such a prick.

Man, how do you go on
day after day?
[CHUCKLES]

Let's go.

Adam, are you coming?

Yeah.
[STAMMERING]

I'll meet you out front?
I just wanna...
Okay.

You're very sweet.

Good luck.
[LAUGHS]

"Good luck"?
Hey, fuck you!

Oh, come on, m-man!

Where in hell
did you meet that bitch?
At the museum.

What, did she give you
a haircut and a blow job,
now you're her puppy?

Phil!
I'm not her puppy!

The wedding sounds great.
[SCOFFS]

Really, it sounds... Yeah.

You don't have to leave.

[SIGHS]

[SHUTTER CLICKS]

[SHUTTER CLICKS]

[WHISPERING]

[WHISPERING]

Were you...

always like this before?

So...

you know.

Shy?
Mm-hmm.

Just about the fact
that no one would ever
sleep with me. That's all.

Come on!
No, seriously.

I mean, you're, like,
I don't know,

only the third person
I've ever...

Really?
Yeah.

I mean it.

And they were both young.

I mean, I was too.

I wasn't, like, hanging out
by a day care or anything.

It was during
high school, mostly.

Hmm.
So you're sort of
in uncharted waters here.

I don't wanna
blow your cover, but...

I could kinda tell.

Yeah?

Yeah.

Well, that's okay.
Nobody here at school?

Well, nothing serious.

Dates.
Some close calls.

But not anyone, you know...

Like Jenny?
No, no.

Are you sorry
you didn't ask her out?

Hmm? I mean, if...

if I wasn't in the equation.

Not really.

Hmm.

We just never got the right...

What...

[SIGHS]
I sort of blew that one.

Anyway, it's kinda weird
talking about it now that...

That's okay.

You know, it's nice to see,
every so often, someone... gallant.

So, did you enjoy tonight?

Uh-huh.

Dinner was great.

The trip into the city...
that was fun.
I like your car.

I meant the performance.

Oh, right, that.

Um...
[STAMMERS]

Not really.

Well...

that's all right.

That's fine.
Oh, no, it's not that
I didn't enjoy it. It was okay.

You didn't think it was amazing?

I thought it was amazing
that the cops didn't bust in
and stop her.

Oh, come on!

How could you not find that moving,
what she was doing?
Easy.

I mean, granted,
I usually love it when a woman
removes her tampon in front of me.

- Very sexy.
- It's not supposed to be sexy.

I was joking.
You know that.

I mean, Jesus,
it's an expression of herself
as an artist, as a woman,

a person.

I couldn't believe
what I was seeing.

Me either.
You didn't get it.
That's all.

No, that's not true.
We just don't agree. That's all.

- I wanted to like it.
- Then why didn't you?

Maybe because she was
finger painting portraits of her daddy
using menstrual blood.

She... is completely influential,

totally vanguard.

To me, it was nasty, it was private,
and I felt like it was something
I wasn't supposed to be seeing.

She allowed you to though.

She allowed you into her world,
into her work,

but in a highly theatrical way.

Exactly my point.
It's called theater, not therapy.

No, it's called performance art!

- It's called her period!
- It's called your taste up your ass!

[DOOR OPENS, CLOSES]

[URINATING]

[TOILET FLUSHES]

[WATER RUNNING IN SINK]

[WATER OFF]
[DOOR OPENS]

Did we just have
our first fight?

I think so.

Yeah, we did.

Cool.

Better mark it down
in our diaries.

Yeah.
Hey.

We can do that... fight.
That's good.

Why good?
'Cause, um,

now we get to make up.

[CHUCKLES]

[SIGHS]

Were you nervous before?

I mean, about us with the video.

Oh, not really.

A bit.
Sure.

Yeah. It's just,
let's not watch it. Okay?
Do we have to do that?

Not if you don't want to.
Good.

'Cause I don't think I could
get into that actually.
See, I'm totally different.

I think everyone should
see themselves doing it,

and their friends
should see it too.

That's why the tape's
going back to my place.
Don't be so frightened of everything.

I'm not.
I'm not frightened anyway.

I just don't think that's
a thing other people
need to see, ever... my ass.

People like who? Philip?

No, that's fine.
You can show him.

Are you crazy?

Why is he your friend?
Oh, God, you don't
wanna go over all that.

I just don't think you need
that kind of person in your life.

I mean, no one does.

It... It may be a touch early
to start dictating
who my friends are.

Yeah... I suppose.

[BOTH CHUCKLING]

Boy, he really got under
your skin, didn't he?

Under, over, around.
I hate that kind of guy.

What kind?
That kind.

Whatever he is,
that's what I hate.
I'll let him know.

No! God, no.
Don't give him the satisfaction.

And he'd take it too.
Believe me.
I don't know.

Maybe it would help him,
you know, be better or something.

The only thing that would help him
is a fuckin' knife through his throat.

Okay, I'm glad I don't have
a pet rabbit or anything.

You know what I mean.

Um... no, not really.

I've just been around his type,
that's all, and I don't like him.

Yeah, I got that part.
No big deal.

Right. No, it was
the "knife through the throat" part
that was the big deal, I thought.

Oh, that's just an expression.

From where?
Transylvania?

No.
[GIGGLES]

From the Scorned Girl's Handbook.

Oh, yeah, page 666.

[GASPS]
You've been peeking.

You know what happens
to peekers, don't you?

Well, if they're deejays,
they usually get asked to play "Misty"
on the radio all the time.

Close.
No, I'll show you.

But you have to
do me a favor.
What's that?

Just... smile.

Smile into the camera...

for as...

long as you can.

[SIGHS]

[EVELYN MOANING]
[GROANS]

Jenny!

Adam! Hi!

Hey.

Hi.

Oh!
So...

Thanks for coming.
I appreciate it.

Of course.
How's it going?

You know... okay.

Right.

Lots to do
for a wedding.
I bet.

Yeah. Invitations to get out,
arrangements to make.

Air tanks to fill.
[LAUGHS]
That too.

So you guys are still
going through with that, huh?
That's what we're saying.

- What do you mean, "saying"?
- No, no, no. We are.

It's what we're doing.
I just...

- Jenny, what?
- I don't know.

I'm just, you know, worried.
Why?

About what?
What do you think?
Philip.

He's just, I don't know,
being funny.

- Funny how?
- Just kinda funny odd.

Like nice.

Nice?
Yeah. You know, sweet?

Now, I love him and all.
I do. You know that.

But that is not the way I would
describe him to people... sweet.
Would you?

I wouldn't exactly use his name
and "sweet" in the same...

short story.

And that's what's bugging me.

I mean, he's only been like this
once before, maybe twice.

But definitely once,
when we were first going out
and he was seeing somebody else.

You remember that?
Yeah. I do.
The other one.

The other Jenny. Exactly.

I'd call and I could hear him
freeze up, you know,

get all sort of... sweet,

fish around slowly
until he figured out
if it was her or me.

God, I used to hate that.

Maybe I'm just
making it all up, you know?

I mean, my own insecurities
and looking for a reason to not...

Dive in?

- Take the plunge?
- Oh, God!

Jump off the deep end?
Stop me before I...

Cute, but yes.

That might be it,
but I don't think so.

I mean, I wanna get married.
I do.

Even if it is underwater.

And I love the guy,
whether he's sweet or not.

It's just, I don't believe him
now that he is.

Well, you got me.

Really? I mean,
you don't know anything?
Haven't felt that?

I only see him, like, once a week
in our survey course, so it's not like
I'm in the inner circle anymore.

I know. I just thought
that maybe you'd tell me
if you knew something.

But I would tell you, Jenny.
I would. Seriously.

Really?
I think so.

I mean... Oh, look,
that's a lousy thing
to pass on to a person.

And if I did, you know,
know something
and then told you,

you'd more likely
hate me forever
than be grateful.

Yeah, that's probably true.

Um, you could lie.
Feel free.

No, you're probably right.
So that doesn't exactly make me
want to come clean here.

Which I have nothing
to come clean about, okay?
Honestly.

It's just...

I-I just feel
that I would.
I-I do.

Because I think
you're pretty amazing...

if the, uh, truth be known.

[CHUCKLES]

And you're almost married,
so why shouldn't it be?

Uh, the truth, I mean.

Thank you.

Not a problem.

Anyway, that's all I know.

Which is nothing.
Okay!

Hwah!
[LAUGHING]

I'm just being stupid.

Hey.

If you feel it, it's not stupid.

[GROANS]
God!

[GIGGLING]

You're a lovely person.
You know that?

"Lovely"?

Jesus, why don't you just
call me gay and get it over with?

Hey!
Lovely is nice.

No, I wish there were
a few more lovely people
in the world.

I mean it. You are.

And getting cuter by the day.
What is that girl doing to you?

Lots.

She's amazing. Really.

What happened to your glasses?

Are you wearing...
No! Adam!

Are those contacts?
Yep.

Contacts.
[GIGGLING]
Oh, my God.

This from the former
tape-around-the-nose-thingie
champion.

That was only for, like, a week!
That one time!

I know, but still,
you gotta admit...

I do. It's great.
I feel better.

"Better."
I mean, you're, like,
this totally hot guy now.

No.
No, I mean, I always thought
you were handsome before, but...

I didn't think you'd go in
for the makeover thingie.

[GIGGLING]
Me either.

Who knew?

Well, apparently she did.

You are still seeing her,
aren't you?

Oh, yeah. She's...

You don't hold a grudge, do ya?
All she said that night...

Oh, God,
I couldn't believe that!
No, it was great.

No, truthfully, it was.
I mean, Phil needed to hear
every word of that.

He did, too.
Hear it, I mean.

You know, he even said something
after you guys left.

I mean, not an admittance
of guilt, exactly,

but as close to one
as we're likely to hear
from the guy.

Really? What'd he say?
I'm amazed.
As was I.

He put on quite the show.
I remember vaguely.

[CHUCKLES]
They both did.

Anyway, later on
he said something like,

"He could do worse."

Not exactly a seal of approval.

No, but a lot for him.

And after what she said?

You're right.

Huh.

Hey, her middle name's
not Jenny or anything, is it?

No such luck.
Whew!
[GIGGLES]

No, it's Ann.

Evelyn Ann Thompson.

It's nice, right?

Eat?
[GIGGLES]

What?

Eat.
Those are her initials.

The acronym of her name
is E-A-T.

Hey, that's cute.
Oh, God, you're a goner.

I know.
It's pathetic, isn't it?

Somewhat.
But lovely.

No, not that again!

What the heck is this?

What is this?
What?

Did you stop biting your nails?
Yeah, for, like,
a month now.

Don't tell me she...
It's true.

She gave me some kind of crap
to put on 'em, and that was it.
I just stopped.

You have nails!
This is crazy!

It's no biggie.

The whole time I've known you...
three years now...

your fingers have looked
like raw meat.

Anyway, awful.

And now you just quit.
This girl is the messiah.

I've quit before.
For, like, an hour.

I love this woman.

Me too.

Yeah, I can see that.
Wow.

And you'd really tell me
if you knew something?

I would, yes.
Okay.

Geez, when did you get so cute?

Whew.
[CHUCKLES]

Shit.

Yeah.
[SIGHS]

What was that all about?
[CHUCKLES]
I don't know.

Uh, I'm not sure.

Look, I'm sorry.

No. Don't be.
I am.

Uh, I'm the one
with the ring on.

Yeah, it's...
my friend's ring.

Good point.
Thanks for reminding me.

You're welcome.

Aw, dang it!

Oh, no, listen,
it wasn't because of,

you know, my worries or whatever,
how I'm feeling about Philip right now.

It wasn't.
Okay.

It just...
Happened.

Right.

I've wanted to do that
for a long time.

Three years.

Me too.

Now we take it
down to the... the beach
and bury it.

Don't we?

Yeah, we do.
Of course.

Um...
don't you want to?

Bury it?

Yes. Or...

No. No, we can't
talk about it.

Don't even say the...

God. Do you have
a shovel in your car?
[NERVOUS CHUCKLE]

Uh, I don't, no.

[BOTH CHUCKLE NERVOUSLY]

But... I have my car.

My bike's right over there.

Then it... should be fine
if we were to...

go to the beach.

I suppose so.

Good.

[SIGHS]

Oh, come on.
We should go bury this.

On the beach.

[MAN]
♪ Oooh, ooh-ooh-ooh
Ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh ♪

♪ Oooh, ooh-ooh-ooh
Ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh ♪

♪ Oooh, ooh-ooh-ooh
Ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh ♪

♪ Oooh, ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh
Ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh ♪

♪ Oooh, ooh-ooh-ooh
Ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh ♪

♪ Oooh, ooh-ooh-ooh
Ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh ♪

♪ Oooh, ooh-ooh-ooh
Ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh♪ ♪

♪♪ [FADES]
What time did they say?

10:30.
It's 10:50 now.

No big deal.
You always wait
at the doctor's office.

I know. I just had to be
at work by 12:00.

Today?

Yeah, I told you that.

No, you didn't.
Yeah, I did.

I always work Wednesdays.

Really?
Yeah. Every Wednesday.

Hmm.
It's okay.
I can be late if I have to.

Are you sure?
Yeah.

I mean, they hate it,
but I'll come up with something.

Or we can go.
No.

I wanna do this. I do.
[SIGHS]

I mean, w-who wouldn't want
to pay a lot of money
to get their nose chopped off?

[CHUCKLES]
[CHUCKLES]

Well, you're only talking to them
anyway. That's all.

It's just weird to think...
People do it
all the time.

Especially out here.

Right.
No, you're right. You're right.

- I just never imagined myself
to be one of those people.
- I'm one of those people.

What? You are not.
Take a look.

Where?

I don't see anything.
Exactly.

You got your nose done?
Honestly?

Sixteen.
My parents' birthday present.

Thoughtful.
I asked for it.
I had this terrible hook.

The Jewish slope,
we called it
in Lake Forest.

The only ski run
for miles around.

I can't believe it.
I can't tell.
That's the idea, isn't it?

You could be lying to me.
What would be
the point of that?

To get me in here.
To watch chunks of my flesh
get torn away.

You could be a sadist
for all I know.
Hey, quit sweet-talking me.

God, they did an amazing job.

Mmm.

Wait a minute.
Your name's Thompson.
That's not Jewish.

On my mother's side, you dope.

That's what makes me Jewish.
Her maiden name is Tessman.

Oh.
We don't have to
stay here, Adam.

No, it's okay.
It just makes me jumpy.

It's cosmetic, not corrective.

Lots of guys do it.
It's no big deal. I promise.

Well, if it's cosmetic,
maybe I should just
put some powder on it.

You know,
I think you'll look great.

You have a good face.

A nice shape to your nose,
actually,

but it's just got that bit of...

What?
Bulb.

At the end. I mean...
Well, not a bulb exactly,
but more of a...

No, I get it.
Sort of a Rudolph effect.

[BOTH MOANING]

PDA.
Indeed.

Shall I go check the men's room?

- I dare you.
- Shut up.

I'm serious.
Is this, like, my last meal
or something?

A conjugal visit
before I'm drawn and quartered?

Stop being so morbid.
It's just flesh.

Yeah, I see what you mean.

It's just flesh.
[CLICKS TONGUE]

That's not morbid at all.
It isn't.

You've bitten more skin off
from around your fingernails...

than a doctor would ever
trim off your nose.

It's true.

How'd you get that scar
on your back?

Which? The...
Yes, the raised one.

A kid, um, threw a stick
at me, first grade.

Stitches?
Yeah. Thirty-three.

And is that terrible?
Are you disfigured
because of it?

Well... I don't like
to wear tank tops.

What's the matter with scars?

Not a thing.

Did you try to...
No. Not really.

I mean, I cut on myself a little,
tried to get attention
when I was a teenager,

but I didn't wanna
slit my veins open.

So, is my arm unattractive to you then
because of those, or not?

No, not at all.

I love your arm.
It's beautiful.

They're like rings on a tree.

They signify experience,
make us unique.

I can see that.
And that's all this is.

The idea of you
having some surgery.
[MOANS]

It's an experience.
[SIGHS]
I know.

It just makes me...
What? Nervous?

"It's a far, far better thing I do
than I have ever done."
[CHUCKLES]

Something like that.
Is that from a book?

[LAUGHING]
Yeah. Dickens.

Ah! So...

are you gonna go check?

What?

What, the restroom?
Uh-huh.

What if they call my name though?
Seriously.

What if they do?

I smell trouble...
Mmm.

which I may not be able
to do after this.

Just go.
All right.

[WOMAN CHATTERING]

Then I can
show you something.
What?

Hmm? Oh, nothin'.
No, uh,

just a little something
I had done... for you.

Wait. No. Show me now.

It's a big religious no-no.

[ZIPPER UNZIPS]

Nice, huh?
"Eat."

Let me guess.
You couldn't afford the "me."

No, you goof.
[LAUGHS]

It's your initials.

Do you like it?

I do.

I like it.

[MUNCHING]

[PHILIP]
I'm serious.
It looks good.

Just shut up. Don't get here late
and then make fun of me.

- No. You look distinguished.
- Phil.

I look like a hockey player.

Yeah, but a distinguished one.

What'd you do anyway?

I fell.
[LAUGHS]

Come on.

What?
Seriously. I did.

You sound like a battered wife.

[MOCK WHIMPERING]
I fell.
That's not funny.

[CHUCKLES]
Yeah, it is. It's very funny.

I mean, it's not that funny
that wives get beat up,

but the fact that you look like one...
that I find hilarious.

Well, that's what happened.
I tripped, I fell. No big deal.

You really fell?
Yeah.

I, uh, tripped going up the...
You know?

No. What?

The... thingie.
I hit the edge of the...

You know.
No. It's "the edge of the"
that I'm a little hazy on here.

The edge of the knob...
my doorknob.

You really tripped?
Truthfully?
Yes. God.

Huh.

Okay.

[PAPER WRAPPER CRINKLING]

Why do you say that..."Huh"?

- What, you don't believe me?
- No. I just...

I saw your girlfriend
the other day,

maybe what, last Thursday.

You weren't in class.
I asked her if you were okay. That's all.

Yeah? So?

And she said yes, but you were recovering
from an operation or something.

What?
That's what I said.

Then she said it wasn't really
an operation, per se,

just some thing you had done...
a "procedure."

That was it.
So I just thought,
No.

I don't know, whatever.

I-I hurt it. Really. I hit it... You know,
I banged it up pretty bad at home.

So I had the doctor
take a look at it, but he
didn't operate or anything.

So where'd you see her?
I don't know.

Starbucks or somewhere...
the mall maybe.

She doesn't drink coffee.

So it was downtown then.

Record City, I think.

Wh-What, you worried
I'm gonna steal her?
No.

God. Don't be so...
Believe me.

- [MUFFLED] Ugh!
- Anyway, it's gonna be fine.

Well, that's good to hear.

Yeah.

And, uh,

you'd tell me if there was
anything seriously wrong.

Of course.

Hey, what's up?

I mean, we're friends, right?

You'd come to me.
About what?

- Phil, what's...
- Jenny told me.

Jenny told you what?

She kissed you.

- Oh.
- She felt shitty, I guess.

I could tell for, like, a week
somethin' was goin' on.

And then finally
she told me about it.
She did.

I mean, she did do that,
but it-it was nothing.

No. I don't mean nothing, no.

Uh, it meant nothing.
It didn't hold any meaning for us.

For "us"? Okay, so you
can speak for her then?
It just happened.

For me. It didn't for me.
It was just a...

[VOICE BREAKING]
And that's all she said?

- Don't tell me there's more.
- No. God, no, not at all. No.

It's all right.

I'd been acting weird lately.

This whole... marriage idea
is just freaky, so...

It's my fault, I guess.

Sorry.

It's better than me
having to kiss you.
[CHUCKLES]

- Good point.
- No tongue, right?

- Oh, Jesus!
- I'm just asking.

No. Please.

Well, I got a 3:10.

[ZIPPER ZIPS]

So long, Romeo.

Where's your jacket?

What?

Okay, this is, uh...
too much.

The cord jacket?

The lumberjacky-lookin' thing?

I don't know.
Uh-huh.

And this, uh,
Tommy Hilfiger-ish job...

Where'd you come up
with that?
The mall. I bought it.

- What's the big deal?
- That's, like, a sailing slicker.

She likes it.
It's reversible.

Well, isn't that just neat?

What I want to know is,
do you like it?

It's okay.
Uh-huh.
Let me ask you this.

Did you get to keep the cord job,
or did she make you toss it?

- Who cares? God...
- Huh?

I threw it out, okay?
Goodwill, actually.

"Goodwill, actually."
It's no big thing.

Dude, don't just say
"no big thing."

I begged you to throw out the farm coat
our freshman year.

I mean, you lost both of us
a lot of dates with that thing on, okay?

You've had it since, like, birth.
All right? So do me a little favor.

Let's not pretend that the jackie
and the, uh, weight...
Ow!

and the Jon Bon Jovi hair
are no big thing.
Ow! Don't!

'Cause when it comes to routine,
you used to be, like,
Mister goddamn Rogers.

It's a fuckin' jacket, Phil!

Just lay off.
Go to class.

Uh-huh, fine.
Fine.

I just hope the next time
we pass each other,
I recognize who the hell you are.

Oh, yeah? Well, if not, you and Evelyn
can always head over to Record City
and have a chat.

Hey! I wouldn't get too deep
into the moral issues during
this particular conversation.

Okay, Romeo?

I may have a big fucking mouth,
but at least I keep it to myself.

[BOTH GRUNTING]

[MUTTERING]
Oh! My...

Oh, is it time to go?
Uh-huh?

Fine. So long, matey!

Ow!

You've got my fuckin' bag!

Dude!
Seriously, I've got class!

♪♪ [LOUD ROCK]
♪♪ [WAILING]

♪♪ [CONTINUES]

♪ Oh ♪

♪♪ [WAILING]

[PEOPLE CHATTERING]

So, everything's good?
Yeah. You know, okay.

Hmm.
You?

Oh, pretty great, actually.
Just studying, working on my art.

Right. You've got that
big thing that you're doing.
Mm.

Thesis project for my degree.

And it's going well?
Yeah.

What was it again?
I never said.

Oh. Well, that's why.

Right. It's this sculpture...
thingie.

Nice.

[CHATTERING]

I think what you've
done with Adam...
it's really great.

What I've done?
Well, just, you know,
he's changed.

That's right. He's changed.
Of course.
I didn't mean that you...

I know. I'm just saying,
he did the work.
Right.

[CLEARS THROAT]
Well, that's always what
they say, though, isn't it?

[CHUCKLING]
What?

Who are "they"?
You know, like in Cosmo,

when they have those tests
asking you what you'd like
to change about your guy.

Ah, now you're gonna get
all scientific on me.

It's true, though, isn't it?
I mean, almost everyone
I've ever gone out with,

if you could alter just
one thing about them or...

even to get them to stop
wearing sunglasses
up on their head all the time,

then they'd be perfect.

- Well, it's that sort of deal, isn't it?
- Something like that.

Or it could just be
that I care about him.

Hmm. Well, Phil's got, like,
six of those "one things,"
but it's the same idea.

Right. And how is old Phil?

Well, he's Phil...
six things away
from being amazing.

[BELL DINGS]

Hey.

- Hey, Evelyn.
- Adam. Hi.

Jenny. I didn't know that you...

I invited her.
Oh.

Uh...
I like your new jacket.

Phil told me about it.
Oh, yeah. It's, uh,

new.

And your nose...
My God, are you okay?

Of course.
It was nothin'.

Falling down
is not nothing.
[ADAM CHUCKLES]

It looks okay though.

- Anyway, uh...
- Anyway, pull up some floor.

We... got you a juice.

You don't drink coffee.
It's not. It's decaf.

It's still coffee.
Good point.

So I drink coffee.
Then I just don't
like the caffeine.

Mm. Jenny was just saying
that she thinks you're great.

I mean, doing great things
with yourself.

Yeah?

Thanks, Jenny.
She thinks you're just
about perfect now.

Don't you, Jenn?
I didn't say that.

No. It's true. I'm exaggerating.
She said... and I paraphrase...

"He's changed,"
but she implied for the better.

Oh. Well, I agree.
I have.

And again, thank you.
You're welcome.

I think you've changed too, Adam.
A lot.

Yeah? How's that?

Well, you've gotten cuter...

and stronger, more confident
and, um...

craftier.

Craftier, huh?
Apparently so.

Oh, that spill you took
must have done it.

[SIGHS]
I'm sorry. Am I missing
something here?

I'm not sure.
Evelyn, what's up?

Nothing. Not a thing.

Well, sometimes it's hard to read me,
you know, know when I'm joking.

Very hard.
It is, but I am... joking.

I mean, Adam took a bad fall
and smashed his nose,
but he's okay now.

See? It healed well,
don't you think?

Yes.
Uh, do you guys want
a salad or something?

I'm hungry.
I'm fine. Jenny?

I'm okay.
Hungry?

Your nose looks...
How much weight have you lost?

Not that much really.

Twenty-one pounds.
I peeked. Is that all right?

- "Peeked"?
- His journal... a record of
his progress that he's keeping.

Really? Oh, that's so cool.

- Cosmo story in the making, huh?
- Yeah.

Okay, I'm, like, totally lost here.

You're mentioned in there too,
Jenny.

Where?
Adam's journal.

I mean, it's a veiled entry,
but I think it's you.

Evelyn.
I peeked twice.

You're right next to someone
known as "cute waitress."
[JENNY] Why is that?

- I mean, Adam?
- You're not.
[STAMMERING]

- Something about a meeting and
a drive after in your cute little "V-dub."
- What are you saying?

- It's getting pretty late.
I really need to get go...
- Don't go. Why are you doing this?

I just want to talk
about the kiss.

Why can't we do that?
This is inappropriate, okay?

[WHISPERING]
Did you tell her?
No. No, no. He didn't.

Philip did. We met,
and he told me all about it.

The rest I got
from lover boy's diary.
She's making that up.

Wait. Philip told you
about our talk? When?

What else
did he tell you?
Lots of things.

He's a very chatty guy
when you... wind him up.

I can't believe it.
Evelyn, let's just drop it, okay?

- If you're angry with me,
all right, but this is not...
- We're just talking.

Fine. You wanna...
Go ahead.

- I mean, Adam wrote something
in his journal, obviously.
- I didn't!

What do you wanna hear?
We kissed.

No. No, no. I... I knew that.

I'm sorry.
I've confused you.

I meant about my kiss...
with Philip.

What?
That's bullshit.

No. That's getting even.

Unless you guys have something else
you want to tell me about...
meaning the drive.

You didn't meet Phil.
Ask him.

- He would have told me.
- Apparently not.

I'm going.

I'm going now, okay?

I'll, uh, see you.

You guys are still coming
to my showing, right?

[FOOTSTEPS DEPARTING]
Well... you said you would.

[BELL DINGS]

Okay.

That was horrible.
Oh, I don't know.

I could've told her about
the blow job I gave him.

Kidding.

- You had no right
to make her feel that way.
- She's got a boyfriend who's shit.

- Now she knows.
- It was still wrong
to treat her like that.

- And me.
- Yeah, let's talk about you.

She called me, okay?
She wanted to get together and,

you know, talk about Phil,
and then...

And then you made out.
Most natural thing in the world.

It was a mistake, okay?
I know that.

I just want the truth.
I told you what I did.

You think I wanted to kiss that guy?
I only did it for the effect.

I'm asking you, Adam.
What else happened?

I deserve to know.

Nothing.

You're sticking with that?

Oh, and glad to hear
about your trip.

- See you next fall.
- What was I supposed to tell him?

- The truth!
- Wh...

Come on.

Look, I took shit
about my new jacket.

That's all people say to me anymore.
"What's up with you?"
"What's goin' on?"

I can't exactly spread it around
what I've done.
What? You fell.

What are we doing here?

Are you tired of me?
Is that it?

God, no!

I don't get it.

I don't want to sound
old-fashioned here, but...

you're a step away from
fuckin' around on me.
I would never do that.

If it hadn't been her,
if it'd have been...

oh, say, that cute waitress
the other night.

You didn't think
I caught that, did you?

The chatty chat and the extra
three bucks on the tip.

That was nothing.

It's never anything...
until it's something.

Geez! Next you're gonna tell me
that the handkerchief with
the strawberries on it is missing.

I don't know that reference.

Evelyn, please.

Evelyn.

I'll do anything you want.

I know what I did was wrong.
I do. I messed up.

So just tell me what to do,
and I'll do it.

I just... I don't...
I don't wanna lose you.

- You're sure?
- I am so sure.

I love you.

Anything I say?

Anything.

Give them up... as friends,
both of them.

Huh?
No explanation.

Don't see them or speak
to them again, not ever.

That's what I want.

That's to prove to me
about how you feel.

- And if I don't?
- Well, um, I pretty much
let these things end.

Final answer?

I choose you.

You choose well...

Grasshopper.

[PEOPLE CHATTERING]

[SIGHS]

Adam.
[CHUCKLING]

- Ahoy.
- Phil.

How's it goin'?
So...

what, you don't
take my calls now?

What? No, I...
It's all right. I understand.

The whole...
[MUMBLING] thing.

- [SIGHS]
- I've just been busy with work and all.

[SCOFFS]
Yeah, whatever.

- Well, I should probably grab a seat.
- Hold up. Hey.

Where's the fire?

What? No. I...

No. I just want a... good spot and...

So, where's Jenny?
Funny.

What?
Man, come on.

We broke up, broke it off... whatever.
You knew that.

No. I... When?

Like, two weeks ago,
right after...

You know.
You and Jenny...
I can't believe that.

Believe it. She came over one day
after seeing you guys, I guess.

That was it... the ring off,

took her CD's back...
gone.

I'm sorry.
I mean, I was lookin' to get out.

You know that. But once you start
makin' those plans, you know...

like pickin' out napkins and shit...

it's almost easier
to just do the thing.

- I don't know what to say.
- Don't worry about it.

You haven't seen her lately,
have you?

- No.
- Okay.

Well, this ought to be good, huh?
[SCOFFS]

[PEOPLE CHATTERING]

- [ADAM]
Jenny.
- Adam.

- Hey.
- Hi, Phil.

I'm sorry... about you guys.

Boy, you just can't keep
anything to yourself, can you?

Well, every so often,
I guess. Right?
What?

You never change.
That's what.

[SIGHS]

- Oh, and, Phil?
- Yeah?

You don't really need
sunglasses indoors.

[SIGHS]

- What is she...
- It's not, like, totally official yet.

Fuck. What are you gonna do?

- Well, we should probably
find a place too.
- Let's grab two close to the exit.

Oh, maybe we shouldn't...

You know, Jenny and...

Whatever.
Take care, man.

[CHATTERING]

[CHATTERING]

Could I...
Mm-hmm.

[PEOPLE SHUSHING]
[CHATTERING DIES DOWN]

Good afternoon.

Thank you for coming out today.

It's the middle of Stop Week,
and I'm sure this is not...

how most of you studying for finals...

would choose to spend your time
away from campus... on campus.

[CHUCKLING]

The accompanying visual portion
of this graduate thesis project...

is currently available in
the exhibition gallery across the way,

so if you don't stay today for...

punch and cookies, um...

please stop by and take a look
at your... convenience.

[YAWNING]

Okay, that's the boring stuff.

Oh, I almost forgot.

And this is fairly personal...
probably shouldn't even do it...

but it really is the capper
to my time here at Mercy,

so please indulge me.

I was given an engagement ring...
two days ago,

and I haven't really
answered the guy yet.

So I wanted to do it today.
Here goes.

This is a beautiful stone...

and an amazing gesture
on your part...

for many reasons.

By the time I'm through here,

I promise that you'll
have your answer.

[MURMURING]

My graduate advisor gave me
this advice five months ago.

"Strive to make art,

but change the world."

And so,
being a good little student,

that's what I set out to do.

With that in mind,
I present you with my newest work.

It is a human sculpture...

on which I've worked
these past 18 weeks...

and of whom I am very proud.

The piece itself is untitled,

since I think... I-I hope...

it will mean something different
to each of you...

and, frankly,
anyone who sees it.

[WHISPERING]
Can I get a spot...
[SWITCH CLICKS]

I did the MTV thing
here on the face.

This is a "before" picture that
I had a classmate take of us...

near the Pizza Hut
out by the highway.

[SCATTERED CHUCKLING]
That was our first
official encounter...

after he asked me out
at his place of work...

a big no-no, or so I was told.

And it was here that I coaxed him
into eating his first vegetarian meal.

[CHUCKLES]
Well, as vegetarian...

as a spinach-and-mushroom
calzone can be.

He also had a salad.

Anyway, he told me that,
for him, it was a huge deal...

and it does mark the beginning
of my systematic makeover...

or sculpting, if you will...

of my two very pliable
materials of choice...

the human flesh...

and the human will.

[AUDIENCE MURMURING]
[FOOTSTEPS DEPARTING]

But this, I'm afraid, was not done
out of love or caring...

or concern.

This was a simple matter of,

"Can I instill 'X' amount of change
in this creature...

using only manipulation
as my palette knife?"

[WOMAN GASPS]

I made sure that nothing
was ever forced...

during our sessions
or sittings together...

I-I can't really say they were
dates, not on my part,

although the illusion of dating
was imperative...

and that his free will was at
the forefront of each decision.

I made suggestions,

presented the illusion
of interest and...

desire,

but never said,
"You must do this."

Not once.

Any questions yet?

I found that with the right coaxing...
yes, coaxing,

often of a sexual nature and often
in very public arenas, I'll admit...

I could hone the inside
of my sculpture...

as well as the surface.

Now, I found myself...

suddenly creating
strong moral ambiguity...

where I could detect only
the slightest traces before,

often in direct proportion
to the amount of external change.

This means, as my subject
became handsomer...

and firmer and more confident,

his actions became
more and more...

um...

questionable.

Against medical advice,

he had work done to his face...

and insisted to those around him
that he had...
What?

merely fallen down.

He also started to deceive
his friends... and myself...

with greater abandon
during this period...

while showing increased interest
in other women.
[SIGHS]

Indeed, he had relations
with his best friend's fiancée...

and continues to withhold details
about the incident from us...

to this day.

Moreover,

he was willing to give those friends up
when asked...

walk away without
any further contact...

after said encounter...

leading me to an assumption
of further wrongdoing...

with the young woman in question.

This is fucked!

[AUDIENCE MURMURING]

I call this act
morally questionable...

because it seems to be motivated,
in my mind at least,

as much out of guilt
as genuine feelings for me.

He has then, as I see it,
been completely...

and totally refashioned
as a person.

And yet,
open any fashion magazine,

turn on any television program,

and the world will tell you
he's only gotten...

more interesting,
more desirable, more normal.

In a word,

better.

He is a living,
breathing example...

of our obsession
with the surface of things,

the shape of them.

Not bad, huh?

This was a completely...
startling and...

unexpected turn of events, but...

obviously, I can't accept.

You can examine the stone
and setting further...

when it's placed in the exhibit.

As for me, I have no regrets,

no feelings of remorse
for my actions,

the manufactured emotions...
none of it.

I have always stood by
the single and simple conceit...

that I am an artist, only that.

There is... only art.

[AUDIENCE MURMURING]

[DOOR OPENS, CLOSES]

Now, you may hold
a different opinion,

feel differently.

I welcome that.

Difference is good,

great, vital even.

Only indifference is suspect.

Only to indifference do I say...

[MICROPHONE ECHOES]

[HUSHED]
fuck you.

[AUDIENCE MURMURING]

[MICROPHONE FEEDBACK]

With that in mind,
I offer you my untitled sculpture...

and supporting materials today.

Thank you.

[AUDIENCE CHATTERING]

[BELL TOLLING]

Not a big modern art crowd,
I guess, huh?

Hey.

Glad you stopped by.

I can't really show my face
in the streets,

so it seemed logical.
Look, Adam, I know that...

Please...
just refer to me as "it"...

or, uh, "untitled."

It'll help me keep
some perspective here.

I know that this a lot for you
to take in and everything, but I...

Uh-huh, yeah.

I got a little Gregor Samsa thing
goin' right now, so, uh...

I know my work relied on not
telling you what was going on.

Sorry.
You're sorry.

That's great. I figured
I was really gonna have to work
to get that one out of you.

Oh, I'm not sorry,
not for what I've done.

I just feel bad
that you're so upset.

[STAMMERING]
Screw you!

You have screwed me, a lot.

You wanna watch it?
Just pull up a chair.

Shit. You are seriously
fucked up.

I mean it.
Listen to your mouth, Adam.
You never used to talk like that.

Oh, you're gonna take credit
for that too, huh?
No.

You picked that up all on your own.
Cute guys always have potty mouths.

They think it makes them cuter.
Oh, yeah?

Tell me how cute
this one is then.

Fuck you!
[GASPS]

You heartless cunt.

[LAUGHS]

So tell me then.
Go ahead.

You feel that way about me.
You can tell me what I did wrong.

If I did something wrong.

You don't see this as wrong?

You honestly have
no concept here.

If you hadn't been here today,

hadn't heard all this stuff,
wouldn't you still be happy...

waiting at home for me,
hoping this went well,
wanting to make love?

- That's not the point.
- Yes, it is. It's the total point.

All that stuff we did was real for you.
Therefore, it was real.

It wasn't for me.
Therefore, it wasn't.

It's all subjective, Adam...
everything.

I'll tell you something real.
I should sue your ass.

You could try.

I did take that risk.
Yeah.

That's right, you did.

[FOOTSTEPS ECHOING]

What's this doin' here?

It was only four bucks
at the Goodwill.

Why would you buy that?

Just so I'd have it...

all of you.

Fine.

What the hell?
It can't get any worse.

If you get off on showing people
my old socks...

and scuzzy sheets, go for it.

[CUP CLATTERS]
I don't "get off" on it.

This is my work, Adam.

I'll give you back whatever you want
as soon as I get my grade.

The ring would be nice.

[VOICE BREAKING]
It was my grandma's.

I'll take care of it.

Good.

Hard feelings?
Me?

No. We had some fun, right?

- Yeah.
- Oh, but, hey, that's subjective.

Exactly.
But do me a favor?

Don't fool yourself
and think that this is art. Okay?

It's a sick fuckin' joke,
but it's not art.

Is that right?
Pretty much, yeah.

And if I'm wrong about that...

I mean, if I've completely
missed the point here,

and somehow puking up...

all your own shitty little neuroses
all over people's laps is actually art,

then you ought to at least realize
there's a price to it all.

Wow. Okay, so...

you're saying...
I should be a better person?

[LAUGHS]
I mean, is that it?

That's the nutshell, yeah.

Better like... you?

[SCOFFS]
No.

Just better.

Oh.

Tell me, though,

just one thing.

Yes?

Was any of it true?

The, uh, nose job...

or Lake Forest?

Your mother's maiden name?

One thing you ever said to me?

[HUSHED]
No.

And the scars are...

That was another project.

I got it.

Sorry.

[FOOTSTEPS DEPARTING]

I should, uh, [SNIFFLES]

probably get going.

Are you coming?

No, not yet. Don't worry.
I'm not gonna mess up your stuff.

No spray paint.

That one time...

in my bed one night
when you leaned over...

and whispered in my ear...
remember?

- And I whispered back to you.
I said that I...
- I remember.

I meant that.

I did.

- Yeah?
- Yes.

Oh.

[FOOTSTEPS DEPARTING]

[MUFFLED SOB]

♪♪

♪ Who dries your eyes
as you cry real tears ♪

♪ Who knows or cares
what an imitation is ♪

♪ Only you do ♪

♪ You can paint his nails
make him wear high heels ♪

♪ Why waste time
alterin' the hemline ♪

♪ Or do you ♪

♪ Tear off your own head ♪

♪ Tear off your own head ♪

♪ It's a doll revolution ♪

♪ You can bat your lashes
You can cut your strings ♪

♪ You can pull his hair
with your move-able fingers ♪

♪ It looks so real ♪

♪ But one won't do it
so collect the set ♪

♪ Dress him in pink ribbons
Put him in a kitchenette ♪

♪ How does this feel ♪

♪ Tear off your own head ♪

♪ Tear off your own head ♪

♪ It's a doll revolution ♪

♪ What's that sound
It'll turn you around ♪

♪ It's a doll revolution ♪

♪ They're takin' over
and they're tearin' it down ♪

♪ It's a doll revolution ♪

♪ You can pull and pinch him
till he cries and squeals ♪

♪ You can twist his body
till it faces backwards ♪

♪ Plastic features ♪

♪ You could make somebody
a pretty little wife ♪

♪ But don't let anybody
tell you how to live your life ♪

♪ Broken pieces ♪

♪ Tear off your own head ♪

♪ Tear off your own head ♪

♪ It's a doll revolution ♪

♪ Tear off your own head ♪

♪ Tear off your own head ♪

♪ It's a doll revolution ♪

♪ Tear off your own head ♪

♪ Tear off your own head ♪

♪ It's a doll revolution ♪

♪ Tear off your own head ♪

♪ Revolution ♪

♪ Revolution ♪

♪ Tear off your own head ♪

♪ Revolution♪ ♪

Please rate this subtitle at www.osdb.link/bksbu
Help other users to choose the best subtitles