Original subtitles

Then, let us begin.

O pitiful boy... o minion of Heart-under-blade.

Wait. Before we do, let me confirm the deal.

If I win...

You're going to return Kiss-shot's right leg.

Is that right?

And if I win, you'll tell me the whereabouts of Heart-under-blade.

Alright then.

Then, let's begin.

ORIGINAL STORY: NISLOLSIN

YOMI ARARAGI: HIROSHI KAMIYA

MASASHI EBARA

MIYU IRINO

HOCHU OTSUKA

NOGATARI PART 2: NEKKETSU

AIKIDO FOR BEGINNERS

THE KEYS To PITCHING

BASEBALL

Dramaturgy is a vampire.

V-Vampire?

He's... a vampire?

Isn't it obvious?

You honestly think there are humans with such a physique?

I've been alive for 500 years, but I've never seen such a human.

But why is a vampire's specialty hunting his fellow vampires? I just don't get it.

It's not unusual for a vampire to hunt his kin.

An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth.

And a vampire for a vampire, right?

Is that you, Araragi?

H...

Hanekawa.

No. I won't show them to you today.

SPIN

Wh-Wh-Wh-Wh- What-What-What are you talking about?

I don-don-don't understand you at all-all-all-all.

Unfortunately, I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about.

What, you've forgotten?

You saw my Panties.

And you were staring at them pretty intently.

I DID SEE THEM

N-No! It's a misunderstanding! A misunderstanding!

I only saw the lining of your skirt.

Th-That's right, I was only paying attention to the lining of your skirt.

That alone makes you a pervert.

Hanekawa...

What are you doing in a place like this?

A stroll, I guess?

Wait... This late at night?

What are you reading, Araragi? A book about baseball?

What, is it a book you can't show me?

Oh, maybe it's one of those dirty books?

Don't be stupid. I've never touched such vulgar publications.

I don't want my soul to become tainted.

Well, good night, then.

Hold on! Since we bumped into each other, we might as well chat a bit longer.

Chat? What are we going to talk about?

Let's see...

Then, Araragi, what did you study today?

I prioritized concentrating on math.

M-Math, huh?

U-Unfortunately, I only studied Spanish today.

Spanish? I see.

Unfortunately, I don't know much Spanish.

Th-That's truly unfortunate.

Yes, I can only hold everyday conversations.

CnacИБo! (Thank you!)

"CnacИБo" is Russian.

Oh, and "CnacИБo" doesn't mean something like "marvelous."

That's not good. You need to learn the correct meaning of words.

Y-Yeah. You really do know everything.

I don't know everything. I only know what I know.

In any case, it doesn't matter what I've been studying.

After all, humans are always learning.

You said something good there, Araragi.

So let's discuss something more productive.

I know! We should think about how to improve society!

I agree.

How do you think we can stop bullying?

Hanekawa...

Why don't you head home now?

I'm about to myself.

Well, I was going to go home, even if you hadn't told me.

Don't walk around at night.

You might run into a vampire, you know?

Actually, I'm kind of hoping to run into one.

Well, I think it's just a rumor, but... I thought, perhaps I'd be able to meet a vampire.

Why?

Why do you want to meet a vampire?

Well, no particular reason...

But I'm at an age where I hope extraordinary things will happen to me.

Like, I'd like to meet a vampire and have a chat.

Enough nonsense!

Huh?

I-I'm sorry. Did something I say offend you?

No, you're what offends me.

You piss me off. So annoying.

I stay alone because I choose to, so don't tag along.

So, A-Araragi... Why are you suddenly saying this?

You were having fun chatting with me until just a few moments ago.

It wasn't fun at all.

I was just pretending to have fun.

I was just after your inheritance.

M-My family isn't that rich, you know?

KISHI GYM

Maybe you're trying to get extra points on your transcript or something,

But Miss Honor Roll shouldn't waste her time on a dunce like me!

You might enjoy the sense of superiority,

But as the one being pitied, it's intolerable!

TSUBASA HANEKAWA Don't mess with other people's phones without permission.

Huh?

Dammit...

Huh? Huh?

DELETE LISTING? [YES] No

DELETING

DELETED

Just get out of my sight.

I understand.

It's all right

This way, my strength as a human should've gone up a little now

BASEBALL PITCHING LESSONS

I've become stronger

That's why

That's why I'm sure I can defeat Dramaturgy

and retrieve Kiss-shot's right leg without any Problems

That's what's most important to me right now

The fact that my heart aches isn't a Problem

MARCH THIRTY-FIRST

NAOETSU HIGH SCHOOL - FRONT

What's wrong? Are you only going to run around, o minion of Heart-under-blade?

Don't call me such a weird name.

H-How's that?

What are you doing, Dramaturgy?

It's as you see. I'm surrendering.

With your amount of power, I wouldn't last if you hit me with that.

It'll take me two days to regenerate.

You misunderstand.

Not many of us vampires can instantly regenerate.

You're one of the exceptions.

After all, you are the minion of the Heart-under-blade.

I may not be a match for your power,

But I thought I might be able to win due to my battle experience.

But that seems to be impossible. I cannot hunt you.

No, but...

Or would you be satisfied if I put it this way?

I won't ever go after you again. So, please, at least spare my life.

NAOETSU HIGH SCHOOL - FRONT

Anyway, I got the right leg.

What just happened?

Hey, Araragi.

I couldn't tell from so far away,

But weren't you doing something like in a horror novel?

It has nothing to do with you.

I mean, why are you following me?

I don't get it. I told you not to bother me.

Don't act like a friend and meddle.

Araragi, you're not the type to say such things.

I feel bad I'm making you say things like that.

But you're forcing yourself to do so because of your current situation, right?

I'm sorry I didn't notice sooner. I'm sorry!

If you're in trouble, I want to be of help!

You're so pushy!

Don't read into things. I just got bored of being with you.

I like to be alone.

Don't lie. I know some people hate others and society, but you're not like that.

Even I can tell that much.

At the least, when you were chatting with me,

You looked like you were having fun.

Like I said, it was because I was after your inheritance!

DAKARA (LIKE I SAID) Like I said, it was because I was after your inheritance!

Like I said, it was because I was after your inheritance!

Like I said, our family isn't that rich! DAKARA (LIKE I SAID)

Like I said, our family isn't that rich!

Then, I was only after your DAKARA!

If you were thirsty, just say so!

I FLUBBED

That's not it!

DAKARA (LIKE I SAID) Like I said, I was only after your body!

KARADA (BODY) Like I said, I was only after your body!

DAKARA or my body, which is it?

Your body!

Then, if you show me your panties again, I'll make up with you.

I understand.

Is this good enough?

Can you see clearly?

Should I take my blouse off, too?

Hey--

I'm sorry for saying such horrible things!

Please be friends with me.

He really did return it, huh?

That's what a negotiator is for.

Here, Heart-under-blade.

But what are you going to do?

That thing's a different size than your current leg...

You can't just swap it out, right?

This is what I do.

Don't watch, fools!

Leave me alone during my meals! That's proper manners!

By the way, Oshino.

What is it?

Dramaturgy had blown away my left arm,

But it immediately regenerated.

So why didn't Kiss-shot's limbs regenerate?

Because, by the time Heart-under-blade met you,

She had lost most of her immortality as a vampire.

Wouldn't you think?

Yeah, that's what I thought!

But, my...

When my arms were chopped off,

The severed limbs had disappeared by the time my arms regenerated.

So, I thought perhaps Kiss-shot's limbs had already disappeared as well...

But that wasn't the case.

So what's the reason why they didn't regenerate or disappear?

She's a rarity, Araragi.

They want all of her body parts intact so they can obtain her power.

Cut up her entire body, and keep those parts intact.

In other words, those guys not only stole her limbs, but her immortality as a vampire.

Oshino.

Can I... really return to being human again?

Of course. You should be able to if you retrieve all of Heart-under-blade's limbs.

Didn't she say so?

Yeah, but what I mean...

Isn't it possible she was lying?

It's possible she's lying in order to regain her limbs.

Hey.

Don't doubt her like that.

Don't you feel sorry for her?

But...

To say something like that about the one who saved your life...

You really are ungrateful.

Come now, what's with that face you're making, Araragi?

Did something nice happen to you, or something?

Don't talk like you can see right through things.

APRIL FIRST

Then, it might be my fault.

What is?

The fact that you ran into a vampire.

You know how they say, "Speak of the devil"?

That saying is pretty valid when it comes to horror stories and such.

When you speak about apparitions, apparitions tend to approach you, so they say.

But isn't that strange?

In that case, since you told me the rumor, a vampire should've appeared to you as well.

That's not necessarily the case. It just means your probability goes up.

Besides, you could say one has appeared in front of me as well, can't you?

You.

Rumors and such aside, you were actively seeking a vampire last night.

Why were you doing such a thing?

You wanted to chat with, um... something superior to humans, was it?

No, I wasn't seriously looking for one.

I guess it's asking for something I don't have.

How do you put it? I'm kind of weighed down right now.

Like I wanted some change in my life?

A change, huh?

In the end, it's merely escaping from reality.

I want to return to reality.

I'm sure you'll be able to.

Though I said I want to be of help, if it's something that grand in scale,

It seems like there isn't much I can do.

That's not really true.

You brought me a change of clothes and stuff... Thanks a lot.

No, it's really nothing.

Anyway, why don't you hurry and change? Those clothes are in tatters.

You're right.

Let's see...

W-Well, but...

I guess I can at least change the top.

You're okay with size M, right?

Y-Yeah.

As for underwear, I got both briefs and boxers.

What's wrong? Aren't you going to change?

I'll change...

Wait a moment.

Just as I thought...

I thought about it yesterday, too, but your physique has changed a bit.

When I saw you from behind yesterday, I kind of felt like it wasn't you.

How your build was different.

You look thinner, or rather, more toned, too.

Of course his physique would change when he becomes a vampire.

His regenerative skills will try to keep his body in the healthiest condition.

Snore.

Excuse me for a second.

To the touch, it's no different than a human's.

Perhaps it feels a bit more elastic?

"No different than a human's"?

Hanekawa, have you touched some other guy's body before?

No, no! of course I haven't done such a thing!

Y-You're right. I said something based on my imagination.

That's not good.

Hurry and put your shirt on.

Sure.

Looks like it's good.

You're a lifesaver, Hanekawa.

I'll make sure to repay you for this.

It's okay.

This is about all I can do.

All you can do?

It's more than enough.

Really, thank you.

N-No need!

When we're in trouble, we help each other out!

If there's anything else you want me to do, don't hesitate to ask.

For now, this is all I can do.

I know! How about I clean up this classroom?

It's quite a mess.

It's fine. It's always been like this.

But that doesn't mean you can clutter it up even more.

You should start cleaning up where you can clean up.

Huh? What's this?

I forgot to tell you.

Since you were holding it so dearly, I picked it up on my way here.

Y-You're such a...

Snore.

Let's see...

You ran into a vampire on the way back from the bookstore, right?

On March 25th?

That night, after we met?

So, what's this?

SPECIAL: CLASS REPS WITH GLASSES So, what's this?

APRIL FOURTH

Episode is a vampire hunter and a half-vampire, huh?

Well, even I'm familiar with those vampire terms,

But can't you give me a few more details?

I've forgotten.

Wh-What're you--

Just hold on. I'll remember soon enough.

I remember now.

What do you remember?

Episode. He vehemently detests vampires.

Vehemently detests?

Why?

"Half" means that half of his blood is a vampire's, right?

Well, to put it simply,

Half-vampires are creatures who aren't accepted in the world of vampires.

On the other hand, they aren't accepted in the world of humans, either.

So... They end up hating their vampire blood.

Of those, Episode in particular has a strong hatred of vampires.

Unlike Dramaturgy, he's working more for personal emotions than for the job.

Totally makes me laugh.

It really does make me laugh...

To think ol' Dramaturgy was defeated by a brat like you.

Well, I'll grant you a quick death, so you don't suffer.

Listen. Don't think I'll go easy on you.

I hate bullying the weak...

But I love bullying bad guys!

Am I something bad?

Of course you are, right? You're a monster.

MONSTER

You're also...

I'm also what?

If you have something to say, go ahead and say it!

No, never mind.

I don't want to say anything.

Let's start.

A-A cross?

Araragi!

You can't give up yet!

Your opponent is mist!

It's mist. In other words--

Hanekawa...

Hanekawa! Hanekawa! Hanekawa!

Araragi, be quiet.

Pull yourself together. You're facing the mist, right?

Totally makes me laugh.

Mist. In other words, water, right?

And what happens when you hurl sand into it?

That's enough.

If you go any further... You can no longer stay human.

O-Oshi... Y-You... You can...

H-Hanekawa!

Don't yell at me like that.

You sure are sassy, Araragi. Did something nice happen to you, or something?

However, sorry to interrupt when you're so sassy, but the match is well over.

See that? He's passed out.

But... But...

Hanekawa is...

Hanekawa is...

Hanekawa is...

Yeah, I saw.

Why were you just watching?

Why didn't you stop it?

It wasn't part of the deal.

I only agreed to negotiate with the three vampire hunting specialists.

Anything more than that costs extra. I don't deal with ordinary civilians.

Then you should've said so at the start!

If you had told me so...

If I had, would you have paid another two million yen to protect Class Prez?

Two million? I would've paid three million!

How can you joke at a time like this, oshino?

JOUDAN (JOKE) It's not a joke (joudan). It's a deal (shoudan), Araragi.

It's not a joke (joudan). It's a deal (shoudan), Araragi.

SHOUDAN (DEAL) It's not a joke (joudan). It's a deal (shoudan), Araragi.

It's not a joke (joudan). It's a deal (shoudan), Araragi.

And we have a deal at three million yen.

Now then, I'll give you a hint.

Why don't you use your head a bit, Araragi?

What's that immortal body of yours for?

Hanekawa...

Araragi?

Why are you rubbing your cheek against my stomach so dearly?

And is my uniform torn because of you, Araragi?

Sorry, Hanekawa.

Let me stay like this just a little longer.

APRIL FIFTH

Physically, at least, I feel a lot better now.

As for my immortality, I've regained almost all of it now.

I see. So that means you're okay to fight the next guy?

No. Unfortunately, it doesn't seem like I can use any of my vampire skills yet.

All it means is that I'm less likely to die than before.

I might be able to go against Dramaturgy like this,

But in my current condition, I can't even win against Episode.

Let alone go against Guillotinecutter.

Guillotinecutter, huh?

I assume he's a "human"?

Unlike Dramaturgy the vampire and Episode the half-vampire,

He's a complete, pure, ordinary human.

I don't think he's an ordinary human.

Well, that's true.

He's, that's right... a priest.

Don't tell me he's on the Christian Special Forces...

Close, but not quite.

But, in any case, he's human, right?

No matter what methods he uses, he's no match for vampires, right?

Not a vampire or a half-vampire, but a human is tasked with exterminating vampires.

We should be extra cautious.

In reality, he was the one who took both of my arms, remember?

That said, I was caught off guard back then.

And somehow, I wasn't feeling too well, either.

If Dramaturgy hunts vampires as a job, and Episode hunts for personal emotions...

Guillotinecutter hunts as his mission.

It's weird for me to say this, but "faith" is rather troublesome to deal with.

Hanekawa, how's the wound on your stomach?

Wound? There's not even a scar.

I see.

Well then, can I take a look?

What do you mean, "Well then"?

Hey, Araragi, would you like to eat sandwiches? This row is tomato.

Oh. No, I'm fine.

Really?

Here, Araragi. Have some Coca-Cola.

BLACK Here, Araragi. Have some Coca-Cola.

Thank you.

Just so you know, mine is diet cola.

ZERO Just so you know, mine is diet cola.

ZERO okay...

Since you naturally stay muscular,

You won't get fat no matter how many calories you eat, right?

If so, girls will be very envious of you.

I don't know.

If anything, I don't have an appetite.

I feel fine even if I don't eat.

Isn't blood a meal for a vampire?

Oh, that's right.

By the way, do you have any desire to drink someone's blood?

No. Come to think of it, I don't.

Hanekawa...

You shouldn't come here anymore.

Well, I thought you'd say that.

I beg you, please don't be hurt.

It's different than before.

Before, I felt that I didn't want to rope you into all of this.

Honestly, a big part of it was that I couldn't keep my feelings in check.

I regret that I was just taking it out on you.

However, it's different now.

How is it different?

Yesterday, when Episode's cross tore a hole in your side...

I lost all sight of myself.

The blood raced to my head.

And I thought there would be death.

My death?

Mine.

I talked with you about strength as a human, right?

The fact that you got injured pained me as if I was the one getting injured.

No, it was much more painful than if I were injured.

Hanekawa, I...

I don't want to return to being human again if it means sacrificing you.

Sacrificing?

I don't think you're doing anything of the sort to me!

But don't you think, "What am I doing?"

Spring break is an important time for us.

But you're wasting it on someone like me.

And on top of that, you almost died!

Don't you think, "What am I doing?" at all?

N-Not at all!

I don't get it.

For instance, if I were you, I couldn't do what you did for me.

Like being in front of such a dangerous guy when you're not even immortal.

I wouldn't have the confidence to expose my body like that.

But you do it like it's no big deal.

You're really scary.

Honestly, it's too much.

Don't be hurt! I don't mean it that way...

But I have no idea why you go so far for my sake.

I'm just one of your classmates you recently got to know.

I don't understand how you can be so devoted to me like that!

You're like a saint.

But your self-sacrifice is too much of a burden for me.

I'm not capable of carrying it.

It's not self-sacrifice.

It's not self-sacrifice!

Then, what is it?

Self-satisfaction.

Araragi, you've got the wrong idea about me!

I'm not that good a person, or that strong a person!

I just do what I want to do.

And I don't think there's a human out there who's as selfish as I am!

I think I'm sly and try to be wily.

So much so that it really would be too much.

However,

if it makes it harder for you to get things done because I'm around,

Then my help isn't really helping, is it?

I guess it's time I was dismissed from the role of errand girl?

It's true that I really don't have anything I can do anymore.

No, there is something you can do.

Wait for me.

In the new term, at that school.

Please wait for me there.

To be able to chat with you again...

I look forward to that with all my heart.

Whoa.

Beep beep beep. Beep beep beep. Beep beep beep.

What's that sound?

My heart leaping.

Girls make that kind of sound effect when their hearts leap?

Whew, that was close. I was about to fall in love (horechau) there.

You were about to dig (horechau)... for a hot spring or some oil or something?

That must be your standard tactic for picking girls up, isn't it?

No, I don't know what you mean.

To begin with, I hardly ever talk to girls.

You're acting all tough and stuff, but you bought such a dirty book.

SPECIAL: CLASS REPS WITH GLASSES You're acting all tough and stuff, but you bought such a dirty book.

Geez...

Well... I'll lend you these.

Give them back in the new term.

Araragi, you like Panties, right?

U-Um...

oh, but if you don't want them...

Nonono, I didn't say I didn't want them or anything.

It's not like we're talking about whether or not I need them and stuff.

Um, what was it?

I need to return them when I see you in the new term, right?

COZY~ COZY~ COZY~

I'm sorry, I can't give these back to you.

H-Huh?

Or rather, I will never give them back.

They will become a family heirloom,

And be passed down in the Araragi family for generations.

I'd rather you not.

This pair of panties has forever been parted from your body!

How selfish!

I won't give the panties back, but in return...

I'll make sure to repay my debt to you when you need it.

Even if I can't do anything,

I'll make sure to be there.

My purpose in life from this day on will be to repay my debt to you.

I don't care. Just give me back my panties.

Without panties, and wearing a skirt like this that offers very little security,

I have to go home from here!

Compared to that, you winning against your final opponent, Guillotinecutter,

Can't be that difficult, can it?

Of course not!

Then, I wish you the best of luck!

I wish you the best of luck!

See you in the new term!

See you in the new term!

Sorry, I made a mistake.

Class Prez has been abducted.

What should I do?

What the hell should I do?

Araragi...

Give up on being a human.

Araragi!

I-I'm sorry, Araragi, I--

You...

What are you going to do with Hanekawa?

Nothing. If you don't do anything, either.

I don't have monstrous strength like you guys,

But I've trained quite a bit.

I can easily kill a girl like her.

And you call yourself human?

Hanekawa...

It'll be fine.

I'll make sure to save you.

This is truly unpleasant.

I'm not patient enough to put up with a make-believe high school friendship.

Let us begin soon.

"Begin"? How will we go about that?

All you have to do is raise both hands in the air

And say "I surrender" as soon as the battle begins.

In other words, the battle is over the moment it begins.

I got it.

A-Araragi...

Don't worry about me!

- There's no way I can't be worried about you! - Araragi! Run for it!

If I can't see you anymore,

There's no meaning in my going back to being a human!

Araragi...

GIVE UP ON BEING A HUMAN

This is truly not human

I've given up being human

I know

I am a monster now

PREVIEW I've been bored this whole time.

But you didn't bore me, servant.

I'll be leaving town. My work is done, after all.

Although, it was a failure.

I told you didn't I?

That you'd be disappointed if you found out who I really am.

Because of me... Because of me...

Because of me...

You didn't save me because it was me.

You would've saved anyone if they were that weak.

Please die, my master!

NOGATARI PART 3: REIKETSU Please die, my master!

NOGATARI PART 3: REIKETSU You shall die, my servant!

NOGATARI PART 3: REIKETSU

A-Araragi!

P-Please m-massage my braless breasts!