Original subtitles

Thirty-one knots.

Tom dropped the ball big time.

This is why I'’m not into, like, guys my age.

I just wish I hadn'’t, like, slept with him,

because now I feel weird.

You'’ve got a boyfriend.

I ----ed up and I'’m gonna admit I ----ed up.

Is this the biggest *bleep* you to my sh--ty day?

You'’re a ----ing sket...

You'’re looking very pretty.

I know.

I'’m going to bed.

It'’s my bed now.

- Good night. - Okay, wow.

Ugh!

Are you coming to sleep in here or not?

Primary charter guest, Jim Blumenthal.

Cannot wait to experience sailing in Menorca

with his girlfriend and close friends.

And the guests are requesting a night in Spain dinner party

with traditional local dishes.

- We'’re on a roll. - We are on a roll.

I mean, except for yesterday morning.

I wanna prove to you on this charter that I should stay.

I need people that I can trust, whatever it is.

Yeah.

If I put him back on anchor watch

and it happens again, I'’m ----ed.

I feel stress that this boat'’s not gonna look perfect.

Looks good.

All done.

Perfect.

I'’m looking forward to this charter.

I was excited.

I'’m a bit nervous now.

I thought the anchor situation was, like,

wrapped up by having the meeting and the chat, and what...

I don'’t know, it doesn'’t sound like.

In what sense?

Kind of brought it back up again and just said...

Mm-hmm.

Look, I'’ve been going through, like, a lot,

but I'’ve never had to deal with this before,

so I'’m just learning.

All crew, all crew, everyone in the cockpit, please.

- Can you pour champagne, please? - Yeah.

- - - Here they come. - I'’m excited.

That is a big boat. My God, that thing is beautiful.

Eyes on the prize, guys.

- Well, hello! - Hello!

- Hi. - Imagine meeting you here.

- Are you Jim? - I'’m Jim.

I'’m Captain Glenn, nice to meet you.

- Nice to meet you, Glenn. - Welcome to Menorca.

- This is Daisy. - Hi, nice to meet you.

My hands are sweaty.

- You ready to sail? - Absolutely.

- Tom, nice to meet you. - Hi. Ashley.

- Nice to meet you. - Thank you.

Marco, Ken.

Well, welcome. I'’d like to welcome you all to Menorca.

Hang on, that'’s my line, that'’s my line.

Yeah, I wanna formally welcome you guys all on board.

I'’m just gonna hand you over to Daisy.

She'’s gonna take you for a little tour of the boat.

- Outstanding. - All right?

- Thank you so much. - Thank you very much.

- Cheers. - Salud!

Nice.

- Do you wanna follow me? - We would love to.

So, up here we have the sun deck,

the bunny pad, the Jacuzzi.

It'’s like a little area for lounging.

Topless only.

- I said "topless," not "tapas." - Tapas!

Then you obviously have the main saloon here.

This is a nice area to cool down in, have pre-dinner drinks.

- You got it? - Ooh, baby, she'’s a heavy one.

This is the master cabin.

This is nice and big and nice and cool.

I think we'’re all sharing.

I think it'’s probably big enough for all of these people.

- Yeah, it is, right? - To be fair.

Okay, that'’s creepy, but all right.

And then we have two twin cabins.

- Wanna take this one? - Yeah, we'’ll take that one.

All good.

We'’re moving shortly.

- Are we gonna sail? - No, not enough breeze.

All right.

- Dinner, will we say 9:00? - Perfect.

And then tomorrow night you guys are having a seafood-palooza,

followed by a talent show.

Guests request a talent show, put on by the yacht crew.

But I can tell you in advance...

Woo!

We are a pretty talentless bunch.

It'’s frustrating when we'’re asked requests

like a talent show, because I don'’t have ----ing time

to think of a bloody talent.

Pretty much the only thing I'’m good at is

getting tan and drinking margaritas.

Let'’s get this party on the road.

And so we'’ll do stern, bow, operating spring,

- which is loose. - Perfect.

That is the most sophisticated sail control

I'’ve ever seen, I mean...

Every... he has...

That'’s all lines clear.

There you go, turn it up. Turn it up, love.

Ken, find some wind, let'’s go.

All right!

I almost patted your butt, I thought it was her.

So, you got really lucky.

Or unlucky, depending on how you look at it.

Unlucky. Come on, Monica.

There ya go. There ya go.

Aw!

I spoke to her.

I mean, I'’ve kind of felt like when I apologized to her,

maybe she was gonna give a small apology to me.

But she likes to be the victim of things, so...

We'’re working on the same boat together.

- It'’s a small ----ing space. - It is.

*bleep*

- Tom? - Yes?

Can you go out and look at the port side?

Port side of the house, the railing, the windows.

Yeah, I have done, Gary said.

Have you... is it done?

No, no, no.

Do you want me to go now, yeah?

Go out and look at it.

Ah.

Hey, Kel, so you'’re gonna go down?

- Yeah. - And I'’ll see you at 10:00.

10:00 p.m.?

Are we on lates together?

Yay!

You cool up here for another 30 minutes?

Yeah, man.

You'’re so annoying.

You and Gabriela are, like, a thing now.

I offered you a threesome. You said no.

I will not be having any threesomes with her.

Oh, is that jealousy I hear in your voice?

No, I'’m not gonna get... I don'’t get jealous.

I thought you guys sorted your stuff out.

We have.

So, are you girls friends now?

Oh, shut up.

...and it wasn'’t until about an hour after that.

I don'’t get it.

If I were Tom, I would be working my ass off.

He doesn'’t even seem fazed.

Like, pick up a chamois, get to work, do something.

Prove your value.

Kind of tipping in.

Your knees were kinda like...

Yep.

Oh, he wanna sh-- up my life.

Ah!

Dead ahead looks all clear.

Let her go now, you can let her go.

You'’re welcome.

Girls, do you mind changing into your blacks, please?

- Copy. - We need a wardrobe change.

That'’s two shots at the waterline.

- I'’m coming.

Colin, that looked like a really good bite.

- We'’re done, thanks, mate. - Copy that.

I'’m gonna go start pulling a few things for the table.

Yeah, I think the flybridge might be nice.

Yeah, and then I'’ll pull all the table stuff.

And I think it'’ll be a bit cooler,

because dinner'’s gonna be at 9:00.

Ah.

I'’m struggling.

You'’re not struggling, this looks beautiful.

I don'’t wanna put too much stuff on the table.

This looks great.

I'’m just really having, like, horny problems.

- Well, that'’s easy... - And they'’re not gonna go away.

That'’s easily solved, I think.

No, it'’s not.

All of these forks are different sizes, by the way.

- Do you need a hand up here? - I don'’t really know.

Should I just provide your entertainment for the evening?

Yeah.

Just because I'’ve got such a nice personality,

you guys are, like... I'’m like a magnet to you.

No, I'’m... no.

I know you are, so don'’t kiss me again.

So, now we'’ve all kissed you?

- No. - Except Kelsie.

Yeah, yes... wait, say that again.

Jesus Christ!

You'’ve all kissed me... exactly.

- Exactly. - Yeah!

This whole - Gabriela- - Gary situation

is ----ing frustrating.

Like, I could have ----ed Gary already.

I could have done it already.

- No one ever saw that for sure. - ----ed.

No, me neither.

Whatever, Gabriela.

I don'’t usually lose, so good luck.

There'’s something in the water on this boat.

- Yeah.

Yeah, my name is Glenn.

I'’m calling from the Parsifal III.

I'’m looking for a deckhand, and I need somebody pretty soon.

Okay, I'’ll see what we can do.

- Thank you very much. - Bye-bye.

I'’ve given it a couple days,

and what'’s happened since hasn'’t convinced me

that it was a one-off *bleep* up.

Mm-mm.

No, don'’t get me wrong, I like the guy.

But what else is he gonna do wrong

if that was his judgment on that?

It'’s a good point.

He'’s still distracted, and on top of that,

it hasn'’t really sunk in

how serious that was, and that'’s scary.

Coming up...

It took us quite a long time to drag.

That is not myself.

I'’ve been going through some things, as you know.

The whole point of anchor watch

is precisely to make sure that doesn'’t happen.

And later...

Ladies and gentlemen, our very own Gary "The Ladykiller" King!

- Yeah! - Ah!

Oh, my God!

They'’re not seated yet, right?

No, they'’re not.

Get yourself ready.

You look beautiful.

Thanks, baby.

Damn, I wish I could take my photos.

- Beautiful. - Oh, my God, look at this.

Marvelous, look at that, look at that.

Ah, the matador is here.

Ha!

Juan Carlos España, at your service.

Dear baby Jesus.

Somebody said it was Spanish night.

It is, I love it.

Tony, you went all out.

I expect you to wear that the rest of the trip, I'’m impressed.

I mean, that is...

- This is real polyester. - I have respect.

That sunset is so amazing.

Guests are seated and wine service is done.

- Okay, Marcos, we'’re ready. - Una momenta.

I think you can go to bed, bruü.

- Are you coming up, Marcos? - Yeah.

Okay, vamos.

Keep it together.

You just go to the far, far end; I'’ll go middle.

Okay.

To a wonderful Spanish evening.

- Look at this. - Oh, yeah.

- Olé! - Olé, olé!

We have traditional octopus,

and I did a twist, with a spicy aioli.

Enjoy, guys.

- Thank you! - You'’re welcome.

That is delicious.

It is so spicy, but it'’s...

In a fantastic way.

Can we get him to come home with us?

Okay.

Thank you so much.

All eaten.

They said it was delicious.

Thank you.

No, never would she do that.

Gabriela, the service is excellent.

- Thank you! - So good.

- Hello! - Hey, how are you?

Good, how are you?

Did you get some sleep?

- I did. - Good for you.

I'’m feeling ready for the night.

Good.

- Vamanos! - Come on, let'’s go, let's go.

Wow, I love lamb.

So, for you guys we have, like, lamb stew.

It has some mushrooms, white wine vinegar,

cooked for four hours.

All right, guys, enjoy it.

I think he'’s got some skills.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, pervert.

Will you just do laundry for 15 minutes,

and then you can go to bed.

You just wake up at half-six.

Okay, let'’s go.

That is beautiful as well.

We have a butternut squash tart, super famous here.

- It'’s amazing. - Gracias!

Mm! Mm!

Do you mind, I'’m trying to do dishes here.

- Hooters! - Guess... no.

Give a real guess.

Definitely not, Jim.

Give a real... do you guys know?

Wait, wait...

Chris has the answer.

He gave you the shocker at the gym?

I'’m so sorry.

You'’re stuck with me, and you should be compensated fairly.

The only thing that'’s gonna stretch

that out is a stronger wind.

- Strong wind, yeah. - So, she should come and get us.

- Exactly. - So, let'’s explain this to her.

Yeah.

I don'’t know if this ----ing anchor watch

is gonna do anything.

The meal was unbelievable.

Is it time for bed?

- Kelsie, do you wanna come up? - Yep.

What happened the other day has never happened to me before.

And I know you'’ve got jobs to do tonight,

but your most important job is this.

Critical...

Any question, like should I get them up,

the moment you think that, come and get us up.

If we get anywhere near the lines

that I'’ve drawn you, that...

Yeah, like... exactly.

Everyone, I think, is still a little shook

from running aground,

so I was totally expecting a very thorough walkthrough.

But I know my duties on night watch...

me and the stars, and the sunrises.

I'’m nervous because of what'’s happened.

- Of what happened, yeah. - Eh?

- Well, you can count on me. - That cannot happen.

Glenn, I got it...

wake you up if I'’m unsure about anything.

Roger, copy.

- Okay. - Nope, it won'’t.

Good.

All right, see you guys tomorrow.

We'’re gonna go to bed, too.

Good night. Sleep well.

- Cheers, thank you. - Good night.

No, not mine.

Mm!

There'’s five knots of wind,

so there are some rocks that come within the line.

I'’ll be up now.

It'’s not fun to wake the boss up,

but I'’d rather wake the boss up than disobey the boss.

Thank God nothing'’s happening, the boat'’s fine.

I'’m happy Kelsie,

she'’s got the confidence to come and wake me up.

She understands what'’s required of her.

♪ Gary'’s gonna wash his hair ♪

♪ He'’s gonna wash his hair, wash his hair, wash his hair ♪

♪ My hair'’s gonna feel clean ♪

Mother----er!

- Morning. - Morning.

That looks good.

Brie, raspberry, and then I put honey truffle on top.

*bleep*

- Good morning. - Can I offer you some coffee?

I'’ll take some coffee.

- Sure. - Awesome.

Ooh... what was... oh, gosh.

Good morning.

There was a wasp.

Good, Jane.

Here we'’ve got fritatas with spinach, onion, and cheese.

Oh, my God, that looks amazing.

These are mini croque monsieurs.

Here we have a brie croûte

with brie, raspberry, and honey truffle on top.

Son of a...

Pastries, bread, bacon, vegan bacon, hash browns...

Oh, my God, there'’s more?

I'’m going straight for the bacon.

So good.

If you and Colin have time, you could work on the talent show.

What does everyone wanna do, like, sing a song?

As long as it doesn'’t have to be a good voice.

Like, give me a line, like,

♪ Oh, here'’s the fruit ♪

That actually sounded really good.

Nothing'’s off the table in yachting.

♪ Oh, ahoy, stand back

- Oh, ahoy. - Oh, ahoy.

We'’re not on a pirate ship.

We could be.

You pretty much can ask the crew to do anything except sex.

And I'’ve been offered money for sex before.

We can'’t choreograph a musical and work.

For this boat to operate effectively and safely,

I need every crewmember to be on their A game.

Tom has been distracted and defensive

since we dragged aground.

What'’s a good excuse for that? I can'’t think of one.

For me, it'’s actually better to be man down

than risk it ever happening again.

He'’s not giving me what I need.

He'’s not taking advantage of that small opportunity.

Tom, Tom, Tom, Glenn.

Meet me in the crew mess, please.

Come on down here. Let'’s have a seat.

Okay, Tom, you know, I'’ve had a little bit of time

to think about this, and it'’s quite clear

that it took us quite a long time to drag.

I have no understanding of how you couldn'’t notice it

if you'’re on anchor watch.

To me, it'’s impossible, it's...

The whole point of anchor watch is precisely

to make sure that doesn'’t happen.

And I feel bad, and I have no pleasure in this,

but you know, the more I think about it...

It'’s okay, don't worry about it, Glenn.

Yeah, I have to let you go. I got no choice.

Just let me say it while I'’m here in front of you.

That is not myself.

I'’ve been going through some things, as you know, that...

I know that.

And that really did affect me in what'’s going on.

I understand that.

It'’s really clear to me that Tom'’s mind is in another place.

So, it'’s not like we can just let him stay

because he can'’t do any harm.

He can still do harm in that mindset.

We'’re not here to provide a job for Tom.

We'’re here to run a safe boat. That'’s gotta be first.

Well, I'’m sorry it couldn't have worked out better.

It is what it is.

Oh, my God.

Get your stuff ready, because I think I'’m gonna

have a ride for you in about an hour, hour and a half.

- Yeah. - Cool?

- It is what it is. - All right, man, thanks.

I feel like this is gonna be one of

the biggest lessons in my whole life.

I just wanna start this whole season again,

and just do a ----ing better job.

You can'’t slack in this game.

I'’ve learned that the hard way.

Yeah, I'’ve gotta go.

It'’s a shame, but it is what it is.

I'’m sad to leave you guys.

Yeah, well, bro, you'’re gonna grow with this...

- Yeah. - Definitely.

I have to.

Yeah, you have to, yeah, yeah.

Yeah.

Gary, Daisy, and Colin,

can you guys meet me up in the wheelhouse?

Copy that, on my way.

- - - Hi, Tom. - Hi, Mum.

- - - How are you? - Been better.

I have to leave, basically.

I'’m not allowed to stay.

It'’s too big of an incident to sort of ignore.

- It was, you know... - Oh.

Yeah, I'’m...

Yeah.

I just wanted to have a quick word with you guys about Tom.

If there was a way I could keep him I would have,

but I can'’t trust him, and we just can'’t afford

to have somebody on board that we can'’t trust.

We are gonna be a little bit short.

Now, I hope to get his replacement

on before the next charter.

In the meantime, Colin, if I could ask you

to help out a little bit more on deck,

and then you can take up some of Tom'’s slack.

Okay, we can make it work.

Yeah, we'’re all just gonna have to chip in, all righty?

- Mm-hmm. - Yeah.

Cool

Let'’s get ready to rumble on the watersports

I wanna do that. They have, like, a float.

- Hello. - Hi.

I hope you don'’t hold any hard feelings.

No, we'’re good.

I know. I know.

We'’ve literally loved and hated each other this whole trip.

I hope that we can be friends one day properly.

You know, I hope we can look back at this

and just laugh at it.

I am gonna miss you, but it'’s just, like,

I feel like this is probably, like, the best thing.

I have learned to never have sex with a woman

who wants to have sex with your boss.

- All right, thanks, Ashley. - Bye, hon.

This could be Tom'’s ride coming now.

No!

- Love you, man. - Love you.

Take it easy.

I didn'’t wanna let anyone down on the crew,

but I'’ve just been up and down like a yo-yo, like, constantly.

I'’m actually leaving the boat,

just for some stuff going on back home.

- Oh, that makes us sad. - Oh!

- Boom. - Take care of you.

- Yeah. - You take care of you.

Good luck with everything.

But definitely need to listen to people more and to...

not to act on my emotions.

- It'’s been real, bro. - Take care, man.

I will.

Look after yourself, keep in touch.

But it'’s time for me to say goodbye.

Well, that was unexpected. That'’s sad.

Really good life lesson for him.

Big time.

What do I do, what did I miss, what'’s happening?

- Feel so out of the loop. - Jesus...

All right, so, Tom'’s left.

Yeah, just learned that.

You can go down, if you want.

Come up at 11:00.

Aw, bye, Tom.

We should have somebody by...

by next charter, we should have the full replacement.

- Are you sad? - Sad?

I mean, I got a little, like, teary-eyed.

I mean, I don'’t, like...

Yeah, we don'’t want nobody to go.

Well, let'’s see how'’s the new boy.

I ----ing hope it'’s someone that Kelsie likes,

someone that Gabriela likes.

I'’m done.

We gotta work together on this, then.

Yeah, I know.

I can jump in wherever. What about the watches?

Kelsie'’s on nights now anyway,

so if you help me out in the day,

Even if I can make you have a break during the day,

put a chamois in my hand.

Gary, we'’re gonna fire up.

I'’m gonna go change my shirt.

You can start picking up.

Anchor'’s home, anchor's home.

Copy, anchor home, thanks.

This is a good breeze, eh?

Now that Tom'’s off the boat, I really wanna get things

back to normal as quickly as possible

to lighten the mood and focus on making sure

the guests have the best experience possible.

Gary, can you pitch up? I'’m gonna do the mizzen.

Copy.

Can I do it?

I'’m gonna try to get everything away,

because I'’m worried we're gonna heel hard.

I feel like I kinda know what I'’m doing,

but you make this look good.

- Do I? - Yeah, yeah.

Well, thank you, thank you.

To the deck, everyone.

Let'’s go see what's happening up there, I guess.

How'’s that?

Boom, you'’re there.

Okay, main.

Sorry it'’s so windy.

I just moussed my hair, I don'’t know

what you'’re talking about, pal.

That'’s it, yep.

- It'’s getting serious now. - Let'’s haul out the genoas.

I don'’t like these cabinets.

And you'’re good.

Oh!

We are moving!

Holy cow!

Ah!

Nice, I like excitement.

Yeah, nice job, Colin.

Dear baby Jesus.

Coming up...

- Ready whenever you are. - Oh, yeah?

- Yeah. - When you told me that?

I thought Gabriela came down and told you?

Where'’s our food?

Oh, ----ing..

Oh, yeah, yeah.

*bleep* me!

That'’s what we should be doing, is, like,

a pots-and-pans band for our talent show.

I can do that.

Yeah, but that'’s what we should be doing.

See, that would be fun.

Gary, if you want, we'’ll put that lazy sheet away now.

Okay, copy.

Well, Ken, I guess you could call the mizzen.

Yes, sir.

Good.

We'’re gonna go to four.

That'’s four shots, four shots.

- Copy, thanks, mate. - Whew, okay.

Dinner is at 9:00.

You'’re on dinner service tonight.

Cool.

I don'’t know what to do about this ----ing talent show.

You know I used to be a professional dancer, right?

What kind of dancing did you do?

- Samba and salsa. - Oh, cool.

That would be good.

I grew up dancing salsa since I was, like, five,

so I was born for this.

When I first moved to L.A., I ended up getting picked up

on a professional samba team,

and my instructor asked me to assist him

on his private salsa lessons with celebrities.

So, I got this.

Ahh... yeah.

I think they would love that.

Yeah, they would.

You wanna brainstorm ideas?

Does any of us have any talent? You.

Zero.

You do play guitar.

So, Daisy and the girls dance.

You'’re the headlining act, with a...

- Yeah, I'’m... - He'’s gonna tell a joke.

- That'’s gonna be the highlight. - Highlight.

Say, hey, guys, we'’re all gonna do a 20-second slot.

So, this is all you get.

Everyone can laugh and applaud, then we move to the next one.

That'’s it, done. Easy-peasy.

Okay, the tender'’s good.

That'’s about it, isn'’t it?

All right, what do you kids wanna do?

- Let'’s pull out the... - Water stuff?

- Yeah, let'’s go, water toys. - Water stuff? Okay.

All right.

Okay, are we gonna blow up some stuff?

Yeah, you are.

Yeah, we need to blow up a sailboat.

I don'’t know where everybody went.

Whew, okay.

Half an hour nap.

They should never leave us in charge, because...

I know.

we'’re just gonna come down and screw some sh-- up.

I bet this is their, like, worst nightmare.

- Oh! - Can I get anyone anything?

Can I jump off the side here?

- Is Gary there? - No, nobody'’s there.

- Oh, okay, you guys are just... - Should I wait?

No... no, you can go, I'’ll stay here.

Gary, Gary, Daisy.

Yeah, Dais, go ahead.

Hey, I'’m just on the swim platform.

The guests are about to go swimming.

I can wait here until you'’re ready.

On my way.

So, you promise Gary and Colin will not get mad

at me if I jump?

I promise you, I will take full responsibility.

You can see all the witnesses.

I mean, there are ----ing how many other people up?

I hate my life.

Whew!

Good job.

Whew, *bleep*. We need a deckie.

You guys are jumping over the side.

They were like, "Are you sure I can jump off?"

I'’m like, "You are allowed to jump off."

Daisy said... Daisy said I could do it!

Oh, you'’re in big trouble, mate!

You'’re such a rat!

You'’re in big trouble!

We do have kayaks also,

and there'’s some nice caves to look at in there.

I don'’t know if that's your guys'’ fancy.

- Ooh, yeah. - Yeah!

*bleep* really?

I mean, I'’m used to hard work,

don'’t get me wrong, but being a man down

---ing sucks, you know?

Kelsie'’s working at night, so she'’s sleeping.

It'’s like, *bleep* you need that extra crewmember there

just to take a bit of load off.

All right, we going on the kayak?

You guys are ready to go.

This is the best.

What'’s up?

That is cool.

I mean, how often do you get to sit in a cave

and look at that view?

- Is that dirty? - Yeah.

- Wait, fishy dirty? - Fresh fishy.

- Mm, then we'’ll put it in there. - Ehh, ehh, ehh.

- I smell it. - Ehh, ehh.

All crew, all crew, the guests are on the way back.

Girls, change into your blacks, please.

Ah.

I'’ve got the kayak.

How were the caves, nice?

- Really fun. - Ah!

Rehydration is key.

I'’m gonna pound a grapefruit martini tomorrow.

We still have St. Germaine left, right?

I'’m doing wine tomorrow.

Permission to invade.

What'’s for dinner tonight, my friend?

We have lobster, clams, mussels...

- Oh! - Scallops, calamari.

Tonight, timing'’s very important because

there'’s gonna be a lot of dishes, family-style.

All right, we'’ll see you tonight.

So, we need to keep the freshness.

The mussels, clams, lobster, scallops...

there'’s a lot of things going on in my galley right now.

Are you okay for your music?

Yeah, I'’m the emcee.

Sweet. Excellent. What time we doing this?

After din-din.

Stunning. Rawr.

Oh, wow.

Come on, hurry up, hurry up. No, get with your wife.

Make sure and get the sunset.

Daisy'’s upstairs with them. What do you need?

You have to wait until they sit down?

I don'’t want it to be overcooked, you know?

Are you gonna try and kiss me again tomorrow night?

And Daisy'’s job.

You'’re gonna do water, or you want me to?

Okay.

Isn'’t "Kevin" the male version of "Karen?"

No, it'’s actually "Chad," I think.

Daisy'’s doing wine and everyone'’s seated.

Okay.

To a great trip, to great friends, and to our next trip.

- Oh! - Yeah!

- Ooh! - I like that.

- Ready whenever you are. - Huh?

- Ready. - Oh, yeah?

- Yeah. - When you told me that?

I thought Gabriela came down and told you.

You told me go ahead?

Really, are you serious right now?

Daisy'’s doing wine and everyone'’s seated.

That'’s why I was standing here staring at you.

All right, all right, all right.

I thought... okay, misunderstanding.

Loco, how dare you throw me under the bus like that?

I have to try to send everything at the same time.

You can ask me for, "Oh, I need now."

It'’s not gonna happen. Where'’s our food?

Raw, raw, raw, raw, raw.

What the *bleep*, Gabby?

Bad.

Ai sh--.

Where'’s our food?

I'’m actually really hungry.

Ai sh--.

So, this is Marcos'’ homemade bread.

Next time, would you like me to say "Fire?"

Okay.

I'’m caught off-guard when Marcos throws me under the bus

right in front of my ----ing face.

Who does that?

This is not my first dinner service.

Like *bleep* man.

You can go with that so they can start picking.

- Shrimp tartare? - Yeah.

So, we have local shrimp tartare.

Oh, yay.

- I'’ve never had shrimp tartare. - Neither have I.

But it'’s really delicious.

- Can I take this? - Go.

Calamari ala plancha and scallops beurre blanc.

Beurre blanc, beurre blanc.

Whatever.

Scallops with beurre blanc sauce.

Yes, that is Marty'’s favorite.

That is delicious.

Keep it together. Okay.

Oh, my gosh, this is heaven on Earth.

Oh, my God, look at that.

- Marcos, this is... - Oh, my God.

The paella, baby.

This is calamari and chorizo rice.

Ooh!

I love you, Marcos.

Have you tried the scallops yet?

Yeah, the scallops are amazing.

Ah, okay, so, I'’m gonna tell some jokes.

What?

I'’m used to hearing, like, "fire," go ahead.

Oh, they'’re sitting, drinking wine.

She just keep talking, and I didn'’t get it.

Okay.

This food is ----ing phenomenal.

Thanks, bro.

All crew, all crew, can everyone come to the crew mess?

Oh sh--.

*bleep* this is embarrassing.

Oh, my Lord.

This talent show better be amazing.

But white could be cute, too, if we do white.

I don'’t like singing and dancing in front of people.

The last time I did that,

I was in elementary school and we sang

"Were All in This Together,"

and of course they clapped for us at the end,

because we'’re ----ing six years old.

Okay, let'’s go.

Woo!

Ladies and gentlemen,

welcome to tonight'’s Parsifal III talent show.

Believe it or not, we all have full-time jobs,

so it was a really tall order to put this together.

But we have some amazing acts for you tonight.

And our opening act, we have

the Parsifal Bombshells performing a sexy salsa.

- Yeah! - Woo!

The last time I did a memorized dance routine

was probably when the Macarena came out in the '’90s.

- Hey, hey, hey!

I'’m, like, sweating.

Woo, nice!

Woo!

Okay, now you have to get up.

It'’s horrible.

Oh, my God!

Whoa, I'’d hate to go second.

- Ah! - Woo!

- Vaya! - Hey!

Oh, wow.

Holy catfish!

Hey!

Yeah!

Woo!

I just wanna talk a little bit about my wife.

Oh!

I went to the doctor, she came with me.

I had a little exam, and at the end of the exam

the doctor told me that I could touch myself

whenever I feel like it.

And I'’m like, "Fantastic."

She said, "No, that'’s not what he said.

"He said, '’You could have a stroke at any time.'’"

Oh!

Woo!

I'’m not married.

♪ Ken wants to be a deckhand

♪ We just might give him a job

♪ Rick and Veronica are laid-back ♪

♪ But they'’re probably freaks in the sack ♪

♪ Natalie'’s Big Jim ♪

♪ He'’s the horniest man you'’ll ever meet ♪

♪ But he'’ll still sweep you off your feet ♪

Oh!

- Yeah! - Woo!

Okay, ladies and gentlemen...

Uh-oh.

Please hold onto your seats.

Our very own Gary "The Ladykiller" King!

Okay, Jim, you'’re gonna come with me.

Jim, you brought this on yourself.

Yeah, he sure did.

Ah!

Oh, my God!

Woo-hoo!

That was unbelievable.

Everyone'’s a winner.

I'’m very proud of the crew.

I'’m amazed. I'’m impressed, actually.

I think it'’s way better than I was expecting.

That was so dang funny.

Except for Gary, that was scary.

I love how we both forgot the choreography.

I know.

Good night, good night, we'’ll see you in the morning.

Gabriela, you can go to bed and get up for 7:00.

- Be on deck at 7:00. - Yeah.

- Okay. - I'’m exhausted.

Here'’s your night duties.

Wind picks up to 15 knots, wake me up, or any alarm.

- You dig? - Mm-hmm.

Sweet.

And I'’m gonna go to bed. Are you all good?

Mm-hmm.

Yeah, sh--. Hell.

Literally, that'’s why I was, like...

I was like, Gabriela needs...

No, I just kissed her.

You'’ve kissed three out of four girls on this boat,

you realize that?

They kissed me.

Yeah.

- You'’re up early. - Are you an early riser?

I think you'’ll be just in time to watch the sunrise.

You want a coffee or anything?

I hope it'’s as good as how the girls make it.

- Well, I guess I am a girl. - It is perfect.

Oh, if you end up that direction,

I'’d take another coffee.

How is this not uncovered, it'’s 7:00?

Kels, can I meet you in the cockpit?

Why is this not uncovered?

Sh--, hell.

This is annoying.

Okay.

What are we doing?

You'’ve been up for an hour, Jim? Should have knocked on my door.

Oh!

Good morning, sunshine.

It'’s gonna be a better morning when I get a coffee.

Hey, Gary, I know you are super busy,

but who would I talk to about getting a coffee?

- Just black coffee? - Yeah, just black.

I couldn'’t find a stew anywhere.

Yeah, and I'’ll be up.

- Gabriela? - Yes, love?

Can we get a black coffee for Rick also, please?

- Yes. - Thanks.

- Morning, Rick. - Hey, Gabriela.

Hey. How we doing?

One question...

what time are the girls supposed to be up in the morning?

She was...

Oh, really?

I know, but we'’ve got two deck crew members

up before any girls.

Okay, okay.

Just trying to work this out.

I'’m not trying to cause a fight.

I mean, I'’m waking up before the stew, it'’s, like...

it'’s weird.

I don'’t know.

Okay *bleep* Gary, I'’m not gonna get into an argument with this.

No, because you'’re defending yourself...

I'’m not arguing at all.

I'’m not getting defensive, I'’m saying that's fine, and...

Yeah, but everything I'’m just saying let'’s work it out,

you just say... and putting words into my mouth.

- No. - You are.

You'’re attacking me and you'’re attacking my department.

You'’re making it sound like we'’re lazy.

There'’s two of us out on deck, Dais.

There'’s three of you girls inside for this charter.

What I'’m trying to say, Gary, is

"I got talking to the guests, I didn'’t do my job"

isn'’t an excuse.

- No, she didn'’t say that. - That'’s what I'm trying to say.

I never said she said that.

But you just came to me saying that Kelsie didn'’t do her work

because she was doing coffees and talking to the guests.

That'’s what I said I imagine was happening.

I'’m actually ----ing pissed off right now.

How hard is it for Daisy to acknowledge

we'’re picking up her slack?

We'’re a man down, for *bleep*'’s sake.

Throw us a fricking bone here.

Fine.

We'’re here for the guests, at the end of the day.

Gary, making a coffee is a crazy request.

Now you'’re putting words into my mouth again.

Well, you just said the problem was the coffees.

Did I say that? I never said that.

I said the problem is Kelsie'’s obviously

had something else to do but the guests,

and sh-- wasn'’t done. That was the problem.

Gary is frustrated, taking it out on me,

and history'’s repeating itself.

This is your department.

I don'’t want that to happen again.

Ugh!

Next on "Below Deck Sailing Yacht"...

You'’re a very insightful person,

but sometimes you make a lot of things about you.

You'’re being a ----ing idiot, so you better stop it.

No, I'’m not being an idiot. I'’m just, like, you...

Yeah, you know what *bleep* off.

Are you girls gonna fight over Gary tonight?

- No. - No.

Someone'’s gonna get hurt, or someone'’s gonna get fired.

This storm last night brought a lot of swell with it.

These are not small swells.

Oh, Jesus Christ.

They'’re gonna break!

Dog those doors, please, dog those doors.

Hold, they'’re gonna break.

Ah, mother----er! *bleep*